#we’re starting over again . anyways
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Chilcille huh... ngl I was a little suspicious. like why would you do that, huh... hope youre not mischaracterizing anyone in your weird and wacky ship. a little weird. but then you said they both had flat asses and you know what? I salute you and your perfect characterization
The fact you seem to think you managed to not make this ask insulting is baffling. What the hell. Fuck off.
If you actually care to be open minded about the ship, I talk about marchil on my sideblog 24/7. Funnily enough I’m currently 4k words deep into an analysis of their character arc together in canon, but that’ll take some more days to get done. Some notable posts:
Of course without counting the analyses of Chilchuck on his own I’ve made, like my masterpost on his family situation. Or better yet you could also read my fics for them, see how weird and wacky they are here.
Wanna talk about mischaracterisation? They’re literally a comedic duo who interacts 24/7. Marchil is crazy bc ppl are like "did those shipper read with their eyes CLOSED?? They have no chemistry!" Meanwhile canon is like: "She’s obsessed with knowing everything she can about him and she reads him like a book." In her eyes he’s like that extra rare and hard and shiny unlockable dating sim character, that brooding mysterious character trope that’s thrilling to crack open and typically is at the center of the plot. The wife roleplay???? "Hey, did you know his type is blondes. Hey did you know he likes his women pretty and blonde. Hey did you know he likes her hair. Hey did you know that he teases her 24/7 and it’s one of the few things that consistently gets him grinning because he finds her reactions cute." Like a schoolyard bully pulling on the pigtails of the girl he likes.
It’s not like they have any thematic narratives or relevance. It’s not like she’ll live to 1000 and has existential dread about it while he’s logically gonna be her next friend to die at 50 and wether it’s romantic or platonic it’ll terrify her to lose him. It’s not like it’s fear of death x fear of rejection so they’re both obsessed with the thought of loss looming, past and ongoing. It’s not like it’s half-elf x half-foot and there’s an inherent journey that was and still is to dispel prejudices and truly come to see each other. It’s not like he’s painfully real and raw and flawed but still a good man, that he’s not the figure of prince charming that she’s always dreamed of while still being virtuous and worth fighting for. Or you know, her hair being golden and it being the epitome of beauty to him, and his hair turning silver and it being Marcille’s worst nightmare.
Just a weird wacky ship who means nothing but shallow things to people who have weirdo reasons for liking it. Like can you not. If you’re not imaginative enough to think of reasons why this ship may have an appealing dynamic that’s not my issue. But yes, yes, they’re both flat asses to me, thanks.
#Dungeon meshi#Ask#Spoilers#dungeon meshi manga spoilers#Marcille donato#chilchuck tims#Marchil#You me the parking lot after i finish and post my arc analysis#Sobbing……… we’re 20 over here in the rarepair pit come on. Like do u not see how obsessed i am. Do u think they like. Mean nothing to me#Do u think it’s all incidental and i slipped and the 10 thousands of words I write for them had no thought or feelings behind them or#Their arc is so beautifuuuuul they come to see each other and her standards become more real while he allows hope and openness#Into his heart again 😭😭 not the way two of their scenes lowkey read as a proposal…#Anyways I hope this makes it clear I’ll fight to my dying breath for them.#I don’t want trouble and i imagine you don’t either so just don’t come shitting on my doorstep#In positive news my fic Grind Me Down Sweetly recently reached 100 likes and 1k hits <3 it can also be read as just platonic so if you like#Them as a duo even as friends give it a shot#Every time I see someone shitting on marchil I start making marchil content faster btw#Not art#Unstoppable force x immovable object my beloved. They need someone stubborn loving methinks. One who loves stubbornly and one who confronts
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i have such strange feelings about gen 4’s pokédex and specifically the new cross-generational evolutions it introduced. a lot of them feel unnecessary and slightly boring but harmless at best, some of them are active tragedies of wasted potential, but then there are a few shining exceptions where i’m like ‘wait, that evo WASN’T introduced in the same gen as the original one? they didn’t think to do that right off the bat?’ i’m looking at togekiss i cannot imagine a world in which togetot was ever conceived as the final stage in a line. like that is not a fully formed pokémon get out of here. thank you togekiss
#anyway#gliscor is a very solid new evo#roserade is cool#weavile is fine#gallade and froslass being new split evos with actual unique ideas are good#the new eeveelutions are definitely in the category of ‘you mean these weren’t in gen 1??????’#and just about all the rest of them are like.#idk#yanmega rhyperior electivire mamoswine magmortar etc etc#they’re too similar to the originals. either that or just ugly or boring#they’re forgettable. you think of the original evolutionary lines and you don’t think of them at all#they’re like that one relative you’ve met about 3 times at most in your life awkwardly showing up#like ohhh yeah that’s right we’re related#whereas it feels like a good cross-generational evo will make you forget a time they ever didn’t exist#pokémon#oh gen 4 my beloved you are so *grabs by the throat* you are such a. game! one of the generations ever#you beautiful thing held together by duct tape and dreams and so poorly planned. mwwwwwahhhhh ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️#tangrowth i’m sorry but ain’t nobody care. yanmega my friend dragonflies are SO cool yet like. still you are not important#lickylicky i’m sorry but a lame evolution is not enough to save a lame pokémon#mamoswine… i’m sorry please just try again. start over
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oh i can already tell i’m about to have some really unpopular opinions about the edge of sleep tv show
#i remember everyone loving the podcast when it came out#but as someone who was an active fan of audio dramas and podcasts for years at that point the show just. made me frustrated#i realized later after listening to left right game that qcode has this very strange and almost uncanny production behind it#where they get incredibly famous actors to play characters and then bank their marketing on that alone#and the writing is always *almost* good. like sometimes you start to think you might actually be listening to a good show#bc i mean the audio quality and special effects are all stellar#but then the writing and acting is always just a little bit too over-the-top and dramatic for it to feel natural#like the writers don’t know how to portray emotion without visuals so they just make everything Way Too Intense#and each time it feels like they just ask ‘what’s the most insane thing that can happen next?’#’oh ok he’s gonna chop dave’s dick off’#and every time you start to actually like a character they say something misogynistic or just otherwise batshit fucking insane#not to mention that time in left right game where a girl confessed her love to her best friend before LITERALLY DYING FOR HER#only for the best friend in the next scene to be like ‘erm i’m not gay 😐 awkward…’ and she’s NEVER BROUGHT UP AGAIN#qcode productions are kinda like the fast fashion of fiction podcasts i think#they churn out so many so quickly and they always feel just slightly unnatural or superficial#not to mention when i tried looking into them years ago and it’s impossible to find#literally anything about them. like their minimalist ass website was so insanely insanely vague#and yet clearly they’ve gotta have a fuck ton of money backing them to have this absurd amount of a-list talent on board#(which really i think that is all they care about)#anyways yeah some markiplier fans are gonna get pissed at me for not kissing the ground he walks on. but i was one of you. i AM one of you#and i hate that somebody out there is holding the iron lung movie over us like we’re dogs and if we wanna watch it#we gotta watch this show. which BTW they are giving no details about where to watch it#and seemingly no promotion or marketing material for a show that’s been in production for years coming out in less than 3 weeks#just weird as fuck man. and i don’t even think mark has much to do with it
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Thinking through the logical conclusions of lore that the source material has clearly not thought that deeply about can be annoying or depressing in the sense of seeing exactly how deep the plot holes go but so long as it doesn’t inherently break the suspension of disbelief or ruin your enjoyment of the overall story it can be really fun to figure out what you can use to plug the holes. Like that’s just free real estate now baby. If the lore implies X but the story wound up at Z, then you can make the journey through Y be whatever you want it to be
#writing#this is about a lot of shows but unfortunately in this specific moment it’s about#elena of avalor#now that [static noise] has a completed draft I need to finish the bed you made#it’s just like half a chapter that I ended up having to rewrite bc the first version of it ceased to work once I finished the fic#but i want to get it finished and up so I’m looking back over my draft#and just. I have. so many Thoughts#I’m v pleased with how I handled the jaquins#low key I want. to write another spin off.#(I have already written two spin offs of this fic that I haven’t even finished posting)#specifically addressing: hey where the fuck is Esteban’s spirit guide. What Is The Deal#this show DEFINITELY didn’t think through ‘everyone has a spirit guide’ lmao#i think it would kind of fuck if Shuriki uhhhhh killed his spirit guide#ANYWAY#so many apologies in advance to my subscribers when that nonsense starts appearing in your inboxes again#i have a problem#the problem is that Esteban Flores is a traumatized little stress ball and I want to shake him around like he’s in a snow globe#SORRY WE’RE AT TAKING THE DISNEY JUNIOR SHOW WAY TOO SERIOUSLY ON MAIN HOURS AGAIN#THIS JUST. THIS IS JUST GONNA HAPPEN AT LEAST UNTIL I GET THIS FIC AND ALL ITS SIDE STORIES OUT OF MY SYSTEM
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us: oh boy looking outside and seeing the rabbits relaxing in our front yard sure is the highlight of our day
also us: (violently eyeing the house of the neighbour that shot most of them some years ago and made seeing the rabbits really rare for a long while)
#we’re also getting dragonflies back over here which is neat#as someone who is terrified of them. seeing them disappear for a long while and then *reappear* is still cool#also ae know how they reproduce now which is not something ae ever wished to know#you can’t exactly tell the wild animals living directly in front of your house to get a room though y’know#anyway. now all we need is for the garden snakes to show up again and we’re back to how we started#that’s neat yeah?
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DATING IS SO HARD WTF
#vent to follow in the tags lmao#like. what????#people!!! chill the fuck out!!#i had some dude unmatch with me bc i didn’t respond to him YESTERDAY#and like it’s not that big of a deal we’d only just matched but like?? patience is a fucking virtue?? and i have a life?#he was all like come back :((( then two minutes later he was like ok sorry for bothering you bye and then LEFT#like. fine if you do that but the message?? what??#anyway it came at a bad time bc. a bitch is already in crisis rn#cause i kinda feel like my irl friends hate me for some reason and i already feel bad that i’ve been so busy i’ve not been able to#talk to them that much#and i was supposed to go on a trip with my friend but that’s been postponed (not her fault or mine)#and my car still won’t start. we tried to jump it today and it didn’t do anything#anyway i’m like rapid cycling through major emotions and it’s like mimi chill the fuck out#and listening to way too much phoebe bridgers i know the end#also i’m in crisis bc i’ve made up with like. my oldest friend who used to have a crush on me and when i told him i preferred girls he like#stopped talking to me for a while#that was years ago and now we’re slowly becoming friends again but i feel so much guilt over it for no reason#and i get into avoidant episodes as a coping mechanism and like. i feel like im going into one atp#okay okay vent over im okay lmaoo#sorry folks hope your days going better than mine <3#。・:*˚:✧。 mimi speaks!
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What a shame… you always had such beautiful hair
#my art#artists on tumblr#the legend of korra#seeds of the red lotus#original character#sotrl haya#found this about 90% finished in one of my Procreate folders and decided to finish it off#apparently we’re on a RL siblings roll lately#oh Haya. Haya Haya Haya…#what can I even say about her?#she’s very high on the list of the worst OCs we have ever created. she’s truly a vile human being with 0 redeeming qualities#and yet.. here she’s just fourteen. lost and confused and grieving#a little brother on her hands and no one to turn to. to lean on. no one to take care of her#she’s a child. she isn’t supposed to have to be the adult because there’s no one else to take up the mantle#she’s a victim of awful circumstances who nevertheless had the CHOICE not to perpetuate them. but she did#and that’s why what she did is unforgivable#but that’s a talk for future Haya. how about we focus on this Haya for now?#I imagine this takes place at some point not long after her parents die#she looks more like Siamak than Afarin but she did inherit Afarin’s hair. it reminds her of her every time she looks in the mirror#and after a while she can’t take it any longer#so she stumbles into the kitchen late at night. pulls scissors out of the drawer and goes wild#but it doesn’t bring any relief. she looks at her curls scattered all over the floor and she just feels worse#the scissors fall out of her hand and it takes everything in her not to cry because Ghazan might wake up and hear her#so she just stands there in the dark kitchen. feeling utterly alone in the world#and she truly. truly is. isn’t she? she’s alone. an orphaned girl no one will ever care about again. how awfully sad is that?#anyway. moving in before I start crying. you know what I just noticed?#the way I drew this implies the scissors fell out of her left hand. meaning likely she was using her left hand. meaning she’s left handed#just like Suiren is. does that mean Suiren inherited that FROM Haya? that it’s yet another similarity they share? well it wasn’t intentional#but now that I’ve though of it… yes. yes that is exactly the case. and I’m close to biting into a wall because of it#did I ever mention that Suiren is left handed before? I can’t remember. but I decided she was +- five years ago. so it’s always been canon
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i seriously need to get a new job and start making money again asap bc i cannot keep living at home much longer it’s driving me insane
(wrote an entire essay in the tags without meaning to oops)
#i feel so isolated from everything bc i’m not in school rn but all my friends are and 90% of the ones who are in state go to the same school#so they’re all in the same town and here i am 45 minutes away#i never get invited to anything bc 1) my friends all tend to make plans really last minute#and 2) if we want to go out and drink - which we usually do bc that’s the stage of life we’re in rn - i’d have to stay the night with#someone bc i absolutely cannot afford a 45 minute uber home and most of my friends don’t like staying over / having people stay over#so i have basically no social life and it’s only gotten worse in the past couple months since i got laid off from my main job#not only did i love that job but i loved my coworkers and work was pretty much the only time i left the house and interacted with people#and without that job i can’t even do the little solo things i used to do to cheer myself up like go see a movie#or even just go for a long drive bc i’m broke (as in i have $17 in cash to my name and am like $1000 in debt rn)#so all i do is rot in bed all day and apply for jobs that i’m overqualified for yet still don’t get hired#i barely even leave my room bc i avoid my family which just makes me feel guilty bc i love my family#but they get on my nerves so easily and most of the conversations i have with my mom end in her lecturing me about something and me crying#and on top of everything it’s just straight up embarrassing to be unemployed and completely directionless about college and living at home#logically i know i’m still very young and it’s common to live at home when you’re 20 but literally none of my friends do#i had a couple friends who lived at home for the first 2 years after high school and went to community college but by now they’ve moved out#and they’re all at universities and either graduating this year or next year meanwhile the earliest i could possibly graduate is in 2 years#i should be finishing my junior year rn but i’ve only completed my freshman year#i hated the school i was at and planned on transferring sophomore year but long story short that didn’t work out#even longer story short i ended up doing a semester each at 2 different community colleges and failed all my classes both times#and took 2 semesters off so now i’m a full 2 years behind and even though my freshman year was miserable#i’m starting to wish i stayed at that school anyway bc at least i would be at a university and accomplishing something#plus theres a huge difference between staying at home for a couple years after high school then moving out later#vs living on your own right away then having to move back home after you’ve already experienced having your own space#and on top of everything i have an older sister who’s a literal genius and graduated last year#and a younger sister who just finished her freshman year at the school i hated but she loves it and got perfect grades and made friends#so they’re both thriving and here i am living with my mom and my 13 year old brother and just completely failing at everything#i’m just so miserable and obviously moving out again and going back to school wouldn’t magically fix everything#but at least i would feel like my life was going somewhere and i wasn’t getting left behind by everyone i know#i just have no idea how to move forward and i feel like ever since high school not a single thing has gone the way i wanted it to#vent
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i promise the plan was to write tonight but you see, i can’t be calm about anything apparently
#ASDFGH it’s a joke but also i had to have a nice long conversation with my sister to feel at peace again#it started as fangirling over the new epic saga and turned into a heart to heart and i honestly feel a lot better#i think we spoke for at least two hours actually :’ ))#it’s very easy to think she won’t understand me bc our personalities have some differences but the older i grow the more i think we’re alik#still different but alike#anyway i love her so much and i love you guys and i’m sorry this week feels particularly bad for writing#tomorrow and sunday i’m gonna try my hardest to make it online and shower y’all with things to read 💜 and my love hehe 💜#for now i’m getting ready to sleep and lurking though… maybe reblog some memes for me to send ya 👀#get ready to ramble | ooc
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channeling best boy eijun and starting to watch kimi ni todoke~
#king’s court#kimi ni todoke#I read part of the manga years ago but I genuinely remember none of it#so we’re starting the anime from the beginning#I’m excited I already adore sawako all over again#her character design is so cute#especially her chibi!!#also sorry but eijun loving his series so much is hilarious because like. I’m a misawa shipper right#you couldn’t find a love interest less like kazuhaya than miyuki#it’s just funny to me#anyway back to watching
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man having grown up in an abusive household makes it so hard to tell when something is a normal disagreement a normal family would have and what is a fight that is absolutely something a normal healthy family would never ever have… like…. 😐
#it happened so fast too I can’t even process how it set off#context being my mom got really dizzy which happens because of her condition#and so we asked her to lay down#about 30 min later she’s back up again making sandwiches for my dad#we all start like calmly kinda teasingly being like cmon dad#she should be laying down why did you have her get up for that#and then my sister said something and then my dad got louder and she got louder and I was like why are we yelling#and so I had to get loud and it was just a whole mess#and my dad got really really fucking mad#and was being a total dick in my opinion#over like… nothing#and my mom sounded all scared and idk man it was a very weird interaction#and I was really shocked up about it because my brain just always goes back to when we used to get hit#but we’re adults now so I’m sure that won’t happen again but sometimes the way my dad gets pissed off#like it feels like it still could happen again one day ykno….#idk#I know so much is in the past#but it still feels like it happen again every so often and it’s very very very scary lol#anyways I can’t wait to leave <3 hahaha#but seriously like is that normal idk probably not I wish I had some sort of reference to what a healthy parent is supposed to be like#i don’t know a single person with a good relationship w their parents at least not both of them#it’s always just like one or none of them lmao#anyways#</3#abuse cw#also to make matters worse this all happened during our movie nights we’ve been having#to make my sisters boyfriend feel welcome in the family#since he moved in#like I can’t imagine moving into my partners house#and just hearing like constant screaming fighting matches randomly throughout the week like ok 😐😐😐
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should i quit my job
#classic post to make at 2:30 am#i’m just. miserable#i worked so much overtime right before christmas (like starting at 9 ending at 1am kinda shit)#and it was like okay well that was a really terrible few weeks but at least it’s over!#and then today i had to work till 9pm.#we’re just so understaffed. since i started here last sept we’ve had 5 people rotate through my team and i’m currently the only member lol#when i joined this team i was the third person!! i was 3 of 3 and now im by myself!!!#and it wasn’t so bad in the summer tbh but that was like 2 months out of the entire year lol#literally since last november it’s been like things are busy but we’re working on getting some help so it will be better soon!#i just feel like i can’t keep up and im tired and im cranky and im angry and irrititable all the time#and it was taking like a genuine physical toll before xmas like went to bed feeling so shaky and awful#anyways i’ve tired myself out here in the tags so im gonna try to sleep again but know that in my heart i had more to say#personal
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I wanna flesh out a yakuza oc but every time I think about it I end up thinking about an oc of mine who already Exists who’s not a yakuza oc. but is, in fact, an oc who is a yakuza. and that fact is genuinely completely unrelated
#he existed WAY before I started playing yakuza or knew really anything about it#actually he contributes to why I got into yakuza to begin with. cause when my friend first showed me y0 I was like ough… my character#grew up in this exact environment and culture and structure and etc (son of a patriarch)#so it was legitimately a good reference for his background and stuff#I kinda wanna talk about him/his background more on here but. like i said he’s. not technically a yakuza oc#and he can’t be because he. canonically. has PLAYED yakuza. like the games EXIST cause it’s just a normal real world type universe and#I won’t get into all this much but he ends up in the states on the dl for Reasons. accidentally ends up with a son when he’s 22 (son’s#mother being significantly younger but again we’re not gonna get into THAT mess). ends up seeing the first game being sold somewhere in nyc#and is unable to restrain his curiosity about it (as an Actual Yakuza) so he ends up getting his son a ps2 for his birthday partly just#as an excuse to buy and play yakuza 1 because he NEEDS to know what’s in it#something something it ends up being a weird bonding thing with his son who’s definitely too young to be watching this game being played#(he was born the same year as haruka so he’d be like. 8-9. also already a concerningly violent child with many issues but. anyway)#something something he ends up disappearing out of the blue from the states when his son is 12 but the pastime still sticks for said son#from then on. so uh. yeah weirdly significant that these games Exist in this story/universe bdsjhfdfjnd#idk why I’m avoiding saying his name. his name’s asura. he’s a year or two older than daigo (born 1974) and his family’s supposed to be a#pretty powerful one in the tokyo area and he was supposed to be a nepo baby sorta like daigo except he’s not Technically an only child- he#has a much younger sister. but obviously she wasn’t gonna be considered for taking over their father’s seat nor would she want to#she wants absolutely nothing to do with any of it and changes her last name pretty soon after moving to the US to get away from them#no beef with her brother or anything she was just treated absolutely horribly and disgustingly by older members of their family growing up#ANYWAY I should stop talking bdshshcbsnnf I didn’t mean to infodump all this the lore is just. deep with these guys#Asura wasn’t even made to be a particularly prominent character or anything it’s his SON who’s a Bonafide Main Character and asura’s ties in#the story are mostly related to Him. (though his sister is also a pretty prominent character so there’s connection there too)#rambling#also one more note. yes. the timing and location of where asura would’ve first bought yakuza 1 means that it would most likely be the#infamous original english dub version. which is hilarious to think about#especially because his son’s mom (I keep calling her that because they weren’t really in a Relationship they just co-parented and lived#together a little less than half the time. it’s complicated) Did Not Approve of a game that Adult around their kid. so she would not be fond#of walking in the room and hearing TEN YEARS IN THE JOINT MADE YOU A FUCKING PUSSY#luckily she was so young and considered her son a lost cause and a burden as it is so. she complained but didn’t really do anything about#it. I mean shit she was like. only around 24-25 I think. but yeah
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you know what. we’re starting fresh. I’m gonna remake
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#I just feel so stuck#I realized once again we’re starting to wrap up a year and I’m not where I want in life#I feel worse about myself than ever before#I’m not happy#I don’t feel cared about#like I feel like I just exist#it’s like I wish I could get a do-over but idk what would even change because everything is external#I’m turning 28 this year and I keep thinking of how many people would say oh it gets better#when#when does it get better#anyway sorry i’m just in a mood
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🦇
#nunya beeswax#i dropped davids stuff off today with an angry letter and a sad letter#and he texted me basically right after saying that he had read them and wanting to come over and talk#and i honest to god figured he wanted to argue but i was like. well i can just kick him out if he starts arguing#but instead he came over and sat down and said ‘youre right about everything you said. i was a bad partner to you and you deserve better. im#not going to make excuses im just here to say that i truly am sorry and i hope you can forgive me’#and i cried a lot and we hugged a lot and anyway. hes gone now. but we’re on good terms again#and the weight of the world on my shoulders feels much much lighter
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