#we have been kinda lucky if we think about it tho

[toobusybeingdelulu]

something something about billy teaching little kids how to swim, and being good at it (otherwise their parents would have not let him); something something about his tendency to keep throwing good advice at people even while being a dick about it (max and steve, for example) something something about him apparently having a natural predisposition for helping people out and-

[danielnelsen]

there’s so much i wanna do this week/month/etc but i’m just too sick, i have no energy, i can’t sleep, i’m constantly nauseous and headachey and on the verge of a migraine, i’m stressed and irritable and impatient and panicky…….how tf did i survive nearly 5 years of high school untreated if i can’t even manage this when i don’t have any major obligations rn

[todayisafridaynight]

YEAH NO TONBI GOT HANDS.......... my timing on suggesting it may be Questionable but I AM very glad it holds up as a movie :] hopefully the interview and We Make Antiques are fun diversions! But also take it easy <3 can confirm Nakai is Pretty Moe in both though <3 And I WILL harass you about Masato's VA next week...

TBF YOU SUGGESTED IT A WEEK OR SO AGO twas on me for taking a while to get to it... nevertheless i did really enjoy it thank you..... AND YAYA IM SO STOKED TO WATCH THE FULL INTERVIEW AND WMA2 THANK YOU SO MUCH AGAIN ☆*: .｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆!!!!!

esp cant wait to hear about masato's VA in the future.. 👁️👁️

[ilythena]

Request: Jack and Luke go to an animal shelter to adopt a pet (cat or dog, which ever is your favorite) and Jack falls for the adoption counselor that helps them pick out the perfect pet

𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐌𝐀𝐋 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑 | 𝐉𝐀𝐂𝐊 𝐇𝐔𝐆𝐇𝐄𝐒

★SUM after Luke begs Jack to get a dog, he ends up lucky in more ways then one.

Fem!reader, straight fluff, no warnings! Kinda short tho, tbh I got too interested in Luke begging Jack for a dog 😭 req are open so don’t be shy to send in some, almost done w a lot of them just gotta find time to post em <3

♪ DIAMOND BOY - SZA

“Can you just hear me out-“ “no.” “Please! Just one!”

Sitting on the bed in Jacks room of their shared apartment, Jack throws his head back with an irritated groan. “Luke, I’m not going to keep arguing with you about this shit. We can’t have a dog. Who’s going to watch it? And clean up after it? We’re both professional hockey players and have zero time for an animal.”

With a pout, Luke hesitates before speaking again. “I’ll clean up after them! And I’ll spend all the time with them!” “Luke no. We have a game tomorrow. Go to bed.”

“Why am I even asking! I’m a grown man. I’ll just get one and bring it home.” “I wish you fucking would.”

Luke storms out of Jacks room and heads to his own. Immediately getting on his phone and ranting to Quinn about his problems, Jack turns his body and sighs.

“…what’s going on with the Hughes’?” “Apparently Jack said no to a dog. Luke’s not taking the rejection well.”

The two brothers glare at each other from across the locker room, Luke tightening his laces and Jack grabbing his stick. He mouths an ‘I’m not changing my mind. No dog.’ And Luke huffs before walking out.

“…..well, he’ll get over it soon.” Nico says, patting Jack on the back and he just frowns. “Why is he so insistent on a pet all of a sudden? I mean, you understand why I’m saying no right?”

“Yes, I understand. But I can also see his side. You two will come to a compromise eventually. Let’s not worry about this stuff and just focus on trying to win the game tonight, okay?” Nico says and with a nod, both boys walk out of the room and onto the ice.

Everything was going well at first, Jack had even scored a goal! But it’s like this week just wasn’t on his side. The opposing team began crushing them after the first quarter, swiftly taking out their team with a score of 3-1.

On top of the crushing loss, it was pouring rain outside. And his umbrella broke, which meant he had to walk in the rain, with his brother who’s mad at him, after he loses a game. Great.

Both boys get to the car cold and covered in water—not a word spoken between the two. Luke closes his door shortly after Jack does and it’s pure silence between the two. Jack starts the car and turns the heat up to the max before driving off and making his way home.

“Hey luke?” “…yeah?” “I’m sorry. I’ve been really stressed out and honestly I don’t think it’s good for us to be arguing over something so stupid. Maybe we should get something to eat-” bark! Jack’s eyes snap over to Luke and suddenly it feels like the car is at 100 degrees.

“What was that.” “What was what…?” Bark! Comes from Luke’s side of the car once again, this time Jack can faintly see something moving inside of his jacket.

“Luke.” “….listen! Do you see how hard and cold it it outside? Poor thing would have freezed to death out there!” “I told you no dogs!” “Look at her!”

Luke pulls the small puppy out from his jacket and you can see her shaking. Wet, cold, and obviously very lost.

“…what do we do now?” Jack whispers and Luke doesn’t answer, pulling the animal closer to his chest. After a moment of discussing what to do, the boys decide to just go home and sleep for the night.

“Hi, welcome in… how can I help you?” “We wanna adopt this dog-“ “no we don’t.”

Jack pushes Luke behind him and gently snatches the puppy from his hands, a sharp gasp cutting through the air when Luke feels the shove.

“Oh! Where did you find them?” “On the street, my brother couldn’t help but pick them up.” You gently take the animal out of Jack’s hands and inspect them for a second before looking him in the eyes. “I’ll have to do a cleaning and a check up for them, since they’re very dirty and I want to make sure the dog is healthy before I give them to you.”

Jack glances at you and when you two make eye contact all the anger he had directed towards Luke died down immediately in his throat. He quietly nodded and in less than a second, you were gone and in the back.

Another one of your coworkers came and got their information, and Jack had sat next to Luke in the small waiting area.

“…can we please keep the dog-“ “maybe.”

After what seemed like hours, you walk out with the dog put in a small kennel, handing it to your coworker. “Good news, puppy is very healthy! Bad news, you can’t keep her because she’s microchipped, which means she does have an owner.” Luke groans in disappointment, but his eyes flicker over to another dog playing through the window in a designated play area.

Jack notices this, and after standing there for a while, he speaks. “….are any of the dogs over there up for adoption?” “Yes sir! All the animals on the right side of the building are up for adoption. Are you interested in adopting today?”

“Um, yes.” Luke’s head snaps over into Jack’s direction. “That’s great! I’ll let you two look at the animals, and let me know if you decide to adopt.”

As you walk away, Jack looks at Luke and glares. “Don’t get too happy. I’m picking the dog.”

“Hello Mr. Hughes, how may I help you today?” “Hey. I know this is really sudden, but I think he’s sick! He’s been throwing up a lot.”

Jack drags in a golden retriever, who his brother named ‘Jett’ and he doesn’t look to well. Slouching and obviously very tired.

“Oh no! Here, follow me. I’ll get him onto the inspection table and I’ll check what’s wrong with him.” He follows you down the hallway with the puppy in his arms and sets him down gently onto the cold metal table.

Watching you take a stethoscope and check up his heartbeat and trying to listen into his stomach, his heart briefly stops when you call in your coworker to do an x-ray on the animal.

After getting sent to the waiting room and waiting an hour, his worried face shifts to confusion when Jett quickly runs out the door and in between Jack’s legs.

“So, I thought he had an infection in his stomach from some sort of food, but as soon as I officially set up the x-ray and tried to put him under it, he refused and went from looking sick to looking completely fine. My diagnosis is that he was trying to get your attention by being dramatic.”

Jack scoffs in disbelief and looks down at the golden ball of fur in between his feet, shaking his head and rolling his eyes.

“Wow. So I brought him here for nothing?” “Pretty much.” You try to hold back a laugh but fail miserably, smiling at the animal and preparing the register for his bill.

“Well, at least he’s okay! That’s all that matters.” You say and Jack lets out a brief chuckle before looking down at the machine.

“150 dollars?!” “Unfortunately, He did waste the supplies used to prep the x-ray machine…”

“Back again, Mr. Hughes?” “He was eating grass, I’m concerned he’s sick.” “You said that the last time you came in.”

It’s been about 4 months since Jack officially adopted Jett, and coincidentally his owners been coming into your clinic non stop for those past 4 months.

“I’m just looking out for him, what kind of owner would I be if I just let everything slide under the rug?” He grins and you scoff with a smile before leading him and his dog into a private room so you can “investigate” the problem with Jett.

The happy dog jumps up onto the table and rolls over, making a happy sort of huffing noise when you rub his stomach. After doing regular check up procedures, you can determine that there’s absolutely nothing wrong with Jett.

“As usual, there’s nothing wrong with your dog. Why do you keep coming in here when you know he’s fine?” Jett jumps on you and you can’t hold back a laugh when he jumps down onto the floor and stands in a playing position. You open the door to the dog play area and let him out to go socialize with the other dogs that stay in the clinic.

“Maybe I just wanna see the cute girl who works here.” “Well maybe there’s an easier way for you to do that instead of dragging him along with you and wasting your money.” Jack bites his lip into a smile and slowly walks closer to you with his hands into his pocket.

“Does that mean that maybe I can take you out on a date this weekend?” “Maybe it does.” You lean against the counter that holds all the paperwork and files in the clinic and take out a small slip of paper, writing something down on it before shoving it into his hands and walking back into a ‘staff only’ facility.

“ xxx-xxx-xxxx. I’ll see you this weekend, Hughes. ;)”

————————————————————————

I would have added my pink banner BUT I ran out of picture space….. sorry this ended so suddenly, I was struggling w how to end it!

© copyright of ilythena. Do not repost or translate onto any other websites.

[lewlewlemon44]

Honeymoon SMAU | LH44

Pairing- reader! x Lewis Hamilton

Warnings- 18+, suggestive content, swearing.

Summary- you and Lewis get married and share part of your honeymoon with your fans.

yourinstagram

yourinstagram We did it! I finally married the love of my life. There is not better feeling than this! I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you @lewishamilton, you are the most amazing person I have ever met, and I can’t express how proud am to be your wife. ❤️

lewishamilton love you babe, I never imagined that one day I’d marry someone as amazing as you❤️

SusieWolff congratulations you two! The ceremony was so beautiful💜

yourinstagram thank you Susie

fencer best night ever bruvs

->yourInstagram would’ve been better if you didn’t come looking for Lew and I but whatever

->Fencer Carmen was looking for him! It was either me or her so just be happy it was only me that had to witness that

->spinzbeatsinc I tried to warn you not to look for them, they can barely keep their hands to themselves without a giant event celebrating their love for one another

->lewishamilton we get it, thanks guys

->teamLH omfisgsgedjg poor Miles

mercedesf1 Mr and Mrs Hamilton💜

F1 Congratulations Mr and Mrs Hamilton! Can’t wait to see you both in the paddock again!

landonorris does this mean I can call you mum now?

->yourInstagram of course son

->landonorris 😎

mrsnorris4 sidgensjdbeb they’ve adopted Lando!

y/nstan oh so we're just going to ignore the 3rd picture... okay

->pierregasly Lewis will kill us if we do

->likedbypierregassleee BBG LEWIS? NO SHOT

->charlesleclerc might look bbg but he's a trained fighter, just ask Max or Fernando

yourbestfriend love you guys! ps this does mean Lewis can stop being my sugar daddy

->yourinstagram of course not, he knows the rules

yourinstagram story

lewishamiltoninstagram story

yourinstagram

yourinstagram one day into the honeymoon and he's already being a dick but whatever, still love you.❤

yourbestfriend girl what did I tell you? take sex away from him when he's being sassy.

->yourintagram how do you know I didn't?☹

->yourbestfriend did you?

->lewishamilton nope

->lewy/n fudeutyujdehgfyuhtgs

lewishamilton I've been a dream, what you talking about?

->yourinstagram babe I've posted the evidence; you threw me in the water and also flipped me off when I asked if you packed the towels.

->lewishamilton nah not true

->maxverstappen we can see it Lewis

->lewishamilton see what?

luluham NOT LEWIS TRYING TO GASLIGHT EVERYONE

liked by youinstagram, maxverstappen and pierregasly

sebastainvettel looks like a lot of fun, enjoy this time before you start having kids!

liked by lewishamilton and yourinstagram

->rb!seb LMAO SEB

lewishamilton love you too sweetie❤

lewishamiltoninstagram story

yourinstagram story

lewishamilton

lewishamilton so lucky to be your husband, kinda miss our son tho .❤

landonorris awe miss you too, dad

->roscoelovescoco 😑

-> y/nstan LEWIS GHUIFH

yourinstagram I'm the lucky one❤

lewy/nsupremacy OMG THEY WENT GO KARTING

danielriccardo who won tho?

->yourinstagram me, of course

->lewishamilton huh?

roscoelovescoco mums so prettys

->yourinstagram thank you Ros, miss you little buddy

->LHitaly oh my god thats so cute

yourinstagram story

youinstagram

yourinstagram look at my man @lewishamilton 🤤

lewishamilton ❤

danielriccardo i'd be shocked if you don't come back pregnant.

liked by lewishamilton and yourinstagram

->landonorris ewww no

->alexalbon don't worry Lando, it's just the stork.

nicolashamilton no, thank you.

->hamiltonbrothers i dont think I can look at him the same

stansunite THEY LIKED DANIELS COMMENT WE'RE GOING TO GET A LEWY/N BABY IN 9 MONTHS

->deluluforlulu OMG THAT BABY WILL BE SO CUTE

->y/nstan imagine the content we'd get omg

[ourflagmeansgayrights]

so part of me wants to blame this entirely on wbd, right? bloys said he was cool with the show getting shopped around, so assuming he was telling the truth (not that im abt to start blindly trusting anything a CEO says lol), that means it’s not an hbo problem. and we already know wbd has an awful track record with refusing to sell their properties—altho unlike coyote v acme, s3 of ofmd isn’t a completed work and therefore there isn’t the same tax writeoff incentive to bury the thing. i just can’t see any reason to hold on to ofmd except for worrying about image, bc it would be embarrassing if they let this show go with such a devoted fanbase and recognizable celebrities and it went somewhere else and did really well (which it would undoubtedly do really well, we’ve long since proven that). it feels kinda tinfoil hat of me to making assumptions abt what’s going on in wbd behind the scenes, but i also feel like there are hints that i’m onto something w my suspicions: suddenly cracking down on fan merch on etsy doesn’t seem like something a studio looking to sell their property would bother with, and we know someone was paying to track the viewing stats on ofmd’s bbc airing, which isn’t finished yet, so i’d expect whoever is monitoring that to not make a decision abt buying ofmd until the s2 finale dropped.

but also i think part of me just wants there to be a clear villain in the situation. it’s kinda comforting to have a face to blame, a clear target to shake my fist at. but the truth is that the entire streaming industry is in the shitter. streaming is not pulling in the kind of profit that investors were promised, and we’re seeing the bubble that was propped up w investor money finally start to pop. studios aren’t leaving much room in their budgets for acquiring new properties, and they’re whittling down what they already have. especially w the strikes last year, they’re all penny pinching like hell. and that’s much a much harder thing to rage against than just one studio or one CEO being shitty. that’s disheartening in a way that’s much bigger and more frightening than if there was just one guy to blame.

my guess is that the truth of the situation is probably somewhere in the middle. wbd is following the same shitty pattern they’ve been following since the merger, and it’s just a hard time for anyone trying to get their story picked up by any studio. ofmd is just one of many shows that are unlucky enough to exist at this very unstable time for the tv/streaming industry.

when i think abt it that way, tho, i’m struck by how lucky we are that ofmd even got to exist at all. if the wbd merger had happened a year earlier, or if djenks and tw tried to pitch this show a year later, there’s no way this show would’ve been made. s1 was given the runtime and the creative freedom needed to tell the story the way the showrunners wanted to, and the final product benefited from it so much that it became a huge hit from sheer gay word of mouth. and for all the imperfections with s2—the shorter episode order, the hard 30 minute per episode limit, the last-minute script changes, the finale a butchered mess of the intended creative vision—the team behind ofmd managed to tell a beautiful story despite the uphill battle they undoubtedly were up against. they ended the season with the main characters in a happy place. ed and stede are together, and our last shot of ed isn’t of him sobbing uncontrollably (like i rlly can’t stress enough how much i would have never been able to acknowledge the existence of this show again if s1 was all we got)

like. y’all. we were this close to a world where ofmd never got to exist. for me, at least, the pain of an undue cancellation is worth getting to have this story at all. so rather than taking my comfort in the form of righteous anger at david zaslav or at wbd or at the entire streaming industry as a whole, i’m trying to focus on how lucky i am to get to have the show in the first place.

bc really, even as i’m reeling in grief to know this is the end of the road for ofmd, a part of me still can’t quite wrap my head around that this show is real. a queer romcom about middle-aged men, a rejection of washboard abs and facetuned beauty standards, a masterful deconstruction and criticism of toxic masculinity, well-written female characters who get to shine despite being in a show that is primarily about manhood and masculinity, diverse characters whose stories never center around oppression and bigotry, a casually nonbinary character, violent revenge fantasies against oppressors that are cathartic but at the same time are not what brings the characters healing and joy, a queer found family, a strong theme of anti colonialism throughout the entire show. a diverse writers room that got to use their perspectives and experiences to inform the story. the fact that above all else, this show is about the love story between ed and stede, which means the character arcs, the thoughts, the feelings, the motivations, the backstories, and everything else that make up the characters of ed and stede are given the most focus and the most care.

bc there rlly aren’t a lot of shows where a character like stede—a flamboyant and overtly gay middle-aged man who abandoned his family to live his life authentically—gets to be the main character of a romcom, gets to be the hero who the show is rooting for.

and god, there definitely aren’t a lot of shows where a character like ed—a queer indigenous man who is famous, successful, hyper-competent, who feels trapped by rigid standards of toxic hypermasculinity, who yearns for softness and gentleness and genuine interpersonal connection and vulnerability, whose mental health struggles and suicidal intentions are given such a huge degree of attention and delicate care in their depiction, who messes up and hurts people when he’s in pain but who the show is still endlessly sympathetic towards—gets to exist at all, much less as the romantic lead and the second protagonist of the show.

so fuck the studios, fuck capitalism, fuck everything that brought the show to an end before the story was told all the way through. because the forces that are keeping s3 from being made are the same forces that would’ve seen the entire show canceled before it even began. s3 is canceled, and s2 suffered from studio meddling, but we still won. we got to have this show. we got to have these characters. there’s been so much working against this show from the very beginning but here we are, two years later, lives changed bc despite all odds, ofmd exists. they can’t take that away from us. they can’t make us stop talking abt or stop caring abt this show. i’m gonna be a fan of this show til the day i die, and the studios hate that. they hate that we care about things that don’t fit into their business strategy, they hate that not everyone will blindly consume endless IP reboots and spin-offs and cheap reality tv.

anyway i dont rlly have a neat way to end this post. sorta just rambling abt my feelings. idk, i know this sucks but im not rlly feeling like wallowing in it. i think my gratitude for the show is outweighing my grief and anger, at least for right now. most important thing tho is im not going anywhere. and my love for this show is certainly not fucking going anywhere.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for "unknowingly" cheating on my girlfriend?

🤍🍇 so i recognize post

preface: yes i am, theres no excuse, i just want to hear more ppl's thought because different ppl in my life have very different opinions on this??? even though i think cheating is cut and dry?

earlier this year, i (20nb, tho i was 19 at the time) was in a purely monogamous relationship with my ex (19f). there were ups and downs, i had some issues that i really shouldve talked to her about, but overall it was the best experience. id never dated anybody before. she's the only person who ive ever loved in that way. i think shes the best person, funny, smart. i was really lucky to have her.

i have another friend, who i'll call H (21f), who has been my friend for years. we're really close, and we've shared a lot with each other. i also love her deeply, though in a different, entirely platonic way. she has told me that she loves me, and has loved me in romantic ways, even though i've never reciprocated (im fine with that, everyone in my main friend group is a little bit polyamorous).

there were two main incidents that happened between me and H. the first, i didnt really understand what was going on or that it was entirely wrong. we were cuddling, which i do with all of my friends, and she started getting really into it and getting on top of me. she asked if she could kiss me (on the lips) and i said no, partly because, well, i had a monogamous partner, and partly because i hate kissing on the lips. i probably shouldve entirely cut it off at that moment. my only excuse (which is pretty flimsy) is that, im kinda aroace so physical affection and the difference between platonic and romantic have always left me a little confused. i kinda thought this was normal, especially because H is polyamorous and in several relationships that heavily blur the lines between platonic and romantic.

then, about two weeks after that, H and i hung out again, but this time we were smoking marijuana. weed makes me highly suggestible and also incapable of remembering anything past about five seconds. not that im blaming the drugs, just describing the situation. basically, H and i were cuddling again when she decided to move on top of me and got flirty, with a lot of touching sensitive places for the purpose of getting a reaction (all above the belt). i went along with this because i respect H, ive known her for a long time, and i didnt want to say no to her. again, not an excuse, because she didnt force me to do it.

in the moment, i didnt think this was cheating. we werent doing anything explicitly sexual, we weren't making out, but we were definitely frisky and i know H was horny at the time. a couple hours later, when i sobered up, i suddenly realized what we had done and asked H if i had just cheated on my girlfriend. she also seemed to realize what had just happened and we agreed that i had cheated, that it was entirely wrong, and we should never do it again.

i decided to tell my ex about this immediately, because i thought she should know. i asked if she was in a position to hear bad news, and when she was, i was completely honest. she obviously didnt take it well, mentioning how she felt like she could never trust me again despite being the person she trusted most in the world. she loved me but this was unacceptable and a huge violation. i agreed, and after a bit of thinking, i told her that i thought we should break up. i had terrible guilt about what i'd done and assumed that we'd never recover, and it didnt seem like she could pull the plug, so i did.

she proceeded to get even more mad at me because of this, which in hindsight is completely understandable. from her perspective, i had just dropped two emotional bombs on her, and maybe i was implying that i liked H more than her. i wasnt, and i dont, but i know why it came across that way.

my other friends agreed with me that i shouldve broken up with her after that. in hindsight, i dont know if it was the right choice. i miss her dearly and wish i had worked more on the relationship.

we've since talked about it. i told her that i still loved her (bc i do, very deeply, and i dont know if i'll ever get over her) but said that i dont expect anything, dont expect a relationship, etc. she was okay with this because, in her words, she trusts me to not make it a big deal or awkward. we hang out frequently now, we watch anime together, and we get along well as friends. i feel so lucky that she is willing to spend time with me, that she still enjoys my company even a little bit.

the confusing part is that i told my dad about this and he basically said, "you were 19yo in a long distance, online-only relationship. this was inevitable and you shouldnt feel too bad about it. it was wrong but not the worst thing ever." i dont really agree with that, because it was a pretty serious relationship despite being online. we even met up at a convention and spent several nights together in a hotel. it was the happiest weekend of my life. i thought i could marry her maybe someday. and i dont think being 19yo justifies it. 13yo maybe, but i was old enough to know right from wrong, even if my knowledge about romantic and sexual relationships was underdeveloped.

basically, im looking for nuanced opinions. i fully expect the results to be YTA. im hoping ppl can give me any sort of insight in the comments.

PS: H is partially to blame bc she knew i was in a monogamous relationship but please dont hate on her too much in the comments, we've had a lot of talks about this and what happened drastically changed the way the both of us see relationships and each other. basically, she learned her lesson and she was never trying to be a bitch or a homewrecker. i know her well enough to know shes a good person at heart. she's also not on tumblr to see any of your comments. direct all of you criticism towards me, please.

What are these acronyms?

[aspergerasparagus]

OH—did the Frankies and Lucky ever have any hang overs before, I don’t know if they have anything to drink buut… do they? And would they do it again?

Real and Monster can't drink (can smoke tho so we won't think about that too much) due to them being robots. Toon can drink but again cartoon logic so he gets "drunk" and kinda has hangovers but they wear off really quickly and he can sober himself up if needed.

Lucky on the other has been drunk and suffers real bad from hangovers. Real Frankie tried to wine and dine him but realised drunk Lucky was really really affectionate and giddy so gave him a whole bottle of wine. He regretted it later when Lucky ended up in the roof rafters and wouldn't come down cos he thought it was part of the show. (He passed out eventually and monster got him.)

[acatwithstockings]

Could you please, please tell me everything about the 1990's Good Omens (very bad) Movie script? you mentioned not being able to taIk about it because no one is interested (which I very much relate to, but in just basically anything Good Omens related) I was not there for when it was leaked, so I'd really like to know like... all of it (I promise I am so interested, and also very very obsessed with Good Omens. I'll absolutely be your captive audience.)

the only things I think I know are that Crowley's mean and has a nightclub, and Aziraphale has a museum(??). and it's in America??

You don't know how happy it just makes me to ramble on about that one. Could write a whole essay tbh (I try my best not to bc my spelling is atrocious pff ).

Only snagged it myself after a whole year of searching when it got put up on Dropbox for a few hours. Got taken down quickly again. Idk if it was bc of a copyright claim or if the owner took it down themselves bc it isn't supposed to be spread around due to said issues and they (not quite so cleverly) posted the Link on a post that would make it especially easy for the copyright holder to find it. At any rate, I Got really lucky in that regard. The copyright issues around this thing are fascinating in general and could make for a great study in regards to the flaws of that system.

As for the script contents... Well it's something.

Yes Crowley is mean, it would be wrong however to reduce that version of him to that. (I will try and point out why later). Yes he owns a nightclub, the aptly named hellfire on a hill (? Idk enough about british topography to know if that's a hint towards a real part of town or just bc the visual of it is cool ) in London. So It does not play in America and Aziraphale is working at the British museum. Canon explanation why they try everything and anything to not give back the artefacts they stole, I suppose. (That was a joke. In the script itself it isn't even as much as mentioned that our favorite angel has any interest in collecting anything, missed opportunity if you ask me)

In general the whole thing plays out extremely differently from the story we all love. And sadly lacks the Prattchian humor... For obvious reasons. It does have it's moments tho not many but they are there. ( "Crowley un-snakes" will never not be funny)

What follows is a lengthy summary which will have a bit of analysis and personal interpretation mixed into it . Bc who needs good struktur if you can do stream of consciousness? Am I right?

We begin with the protagonist Crowley in company of Aziraphale, who in this version sadly takes a bit of a backseat, playing checkers in Aziraphale's study. In this version they are color coded: with pure white clothing and hair and pure black clothing and hair. Crowley remarks that 'everything is going too well'. To which Aziraphale points out, that complaining seems to be a favorite past time of the demon. in this version he has a knack for putting down/dismissing Crowley on basis of being a demon (" Oh, isn't that just like a demon? Six-thousand years and all you do is complain") and it's part of his ark , kinda. Cohesion and following things through isn't exactly a strong suit here.

It looks like Aziraphale is about to win, however Crowley uses the cliché 'Lock over there' trick to cheat. In the following dialogue we learn that they have been playing one checkers match a week for the past six thousand years. So basically it's presumed they played their first match in Eden before checkers was even invented. (Then again the stage direction describes a painting depicting Crowley as green snake wearing sunglasses in Eden, so they just have been trend setters from the start) . They then set a date for their next match, Crowley makes his distaste for earth known, they meet Aziraphale's assistant Polly, who is very unimpressed by Crowley and then he is off not without causing some mischief with a stolen wallet.

Aziraphale gets a little scene where he is appraising a painting for its authenticity. He gets called 'bramy as a box of fruit bats' and tells the ones that brought the painting that if it were real, he'd know bc he would have seen the master paint it. The interesting thing here is that this scene essentially is there to show us, that despite not acknowledging Crowley's cheating or directly calling out the forgery and its purpose (to gain money), even calling it pretty, he knows what's going on he simply chooses to play/be aloof .

Next we get introduced to the nightclub. Nothing much happens here at first except that we get introduced to the Barstaff. Or well at least Tina (my love) the barman. As it seems Crowley is managing a successful business and outside of a little rant, calling people sheep and wanting bigger cocktail umbrellas, he genuinely seems to be competent in his leadership and friendly to his staff. Even knowing them by name .

Other notable staff members are Warren, I think he has one line and is the handyman/security of the nightclub and Marjorie who gets a few more lines and is part of the waitstaff. Who by the way are put in full body imp costumes bc of course the nightclub is themed after hell.

Crowley then contacts hell, where he ultimately gets told that Satan himself has a special task for him. And we get the first clue that Crowley, who so far has given us very cool very early 90's style Anti"hero' is scared shitless. Not just that, hell thinks he is a bit of a loser, not being impressed by his mission reports and all that.

We then get to the good old Hyde Park scene with a nearly drowned drake safed by Aziraphale's intervention and everything. What is interesting here however is, that Crowley is a full blown nihilist and Aziraphale just very over enthusiastically positive. Aziraphale saying a woman is doing something good by giving her ice cream to a child while Crowley points out that the ice had first been dropped to the ground and been liked by a dog. (Script!Aziraphale as much as I love you but I am with script! Crowley on this one). Aziraphale points out that that hardly matters because the child is happy and that makes it a good deed. Crowley snarkily retorts that happiness is a stupid metric for good things and says he likes one thing about humans : that they are reliable in doing the selfish bad thing.

Aziraphale then tries to get Crowley to reveal why things are going to well. Crowley points out that they are enemies and he shouldn't give out that information despite the arrangement (sadly we don't get more information about that but I would love to know how it looked in that universe) and only is convinced by Aziraphale being hurt about it and giving him sad puppy eyes. Crowley then invites Aziraphale over to his nightclub after hours to talk about what head office actually wants from him.

We then jump to the nightclub again. Crowley is surprisingly decent towards people, Tina is managing the club and all seems rather nice. Madam Tracy is making an entrance. In this version she is an slowly aging out of it IT-girl. It's implied that she had a multitude of affairs and that she has now been payed off big time. (I enjoy Madam Tracy in this version a LOT). She never seems to be quite there but still owns any situation.

Her and Crowley have a little conversation that gets broken up when he decides to deal with a Troublemaker at the bar instead of letting Warren take care of it. (Side note that part of the script gave me the HC that script! Crowley is very short, definitely shorter than script!Aziraphale don't ask me why) . He is having a full blown Anime protagonist moment, including using the bribe the trouble maker gives him to give to the Waitress the Troublemaker had harassed in a very cool™ manner and stopping a punch with one hand. Just believe me it's very anime. But again Crowley seems to be actual decent boss, believe it or not.

He then gets a Call in the bathroom . Satan talking to him through the mirror without prior notice. He orders Crowley to get to a graveyard within 30 minutes. Crowley is keeping it together but he is panicking. He is having a short conversation with Tracy again in which he stays relatively friendly surprisingly enough.

Fun fact this whole film would have had "Every day' as musical theme. Bc from this moment the song gets mentioned continuously.

After speeding and vandalizing a cop car out of desperation since he is late and they determined to stop him, we get to meet satan. In this version he is a cold calculating (but very cool) business man . Crowley, in German we'd say 'legt sich erstmal ordentlich auf's maul' (meaning he trips and falls on the ground). He is groveling before him, bootlicking and trying to appease his Master (for real tho if that movie would have been made there would have been Satan/Crowley shippers bc that shit is some fuel for a toxic ship). At any rate Crowley is making a bit of a fool of himself and Satan is enjoying the Powertrip. In the end he gives Crowley the antichrist with the task to raise the baby or else suffer worse than anyone else in hell. However if he succeedes he is getting to leave the planet (again he supposedly doesn't even like earth in this version)

Anathema is introduced. She is just a little occult girl that felt the antichrist coming to earth. No mentioning of prophecies or anything. Our beloved Agnes does not exist in this universe. Just a little girl with green eyes and a sense for the occult.

Now with a baby he is supposed to take care of, Crowley makes his way back to the nightclub. There he hides the newborn from his employees and gets pulled away to discuss something by Tina. Since he is hiding the baby he puts the newborn down, right into Madam Tracy's money bag. And well, while he is off talking with Tina , Madam Tracy is taking her bag without noticing the child and off she goes. Leaving Crowley with the problem of a lost antichrist and for some reason a slowmo shot of him trying to catch up with a taxi.

He starts drinking. He knows he is done for so what's the point. (The first bottle he grabs is Aardvark Snapps idk why I finde that interesting) . At this point he has accepted that he will end up for an eternity being punished. Hours later Aziraphale makes an appearance and is a little bit judgemental about Crowley being drunk. (Side note: an other hc of mine is that script!Aziraphale is straight edge bc of that scene). Crowley tries to have him join him drinking but fails. And then just tries a to have a little heart to heart. ("I am doomed, Aziraphale") Only getting a little speech about being a demon and therefore inherently being doomed ('duhhh!') back.

Crowley eventually just confides in Aziraphale how much he has fucked up having a bit of a monologue about it. Eventually Aziraphale offers to help find the boy, but only if he is allowed to influence him. To which Crowley reluctantly agrees, because it would mean that he still fails his task of raising a boy that Satan could be proud of. But Aziraphale is a little bit manipulative (also Crowley is still drunk while Aziraphale is sober) so they shake on it. Anyway this exchange is one of my favorites in the script .

We finally jump eleven years into the future and get to meet Adam.

He has been adopted by Madam Tracy. And is now running a bed and breakfast in the quaint little town of Tadfield. Instead of an army base this Tadfield has direct access to the sea. Including it's very own pier. Anyhow I said Adam is running the b&b that's because Madam Tracy is a neglectful parent and as much as I enjoy her script version, she is not doing great here. Adam is running errands, making breakfast for his mom and generally keeping things together. His whole introduction is him being a little adult .

He finally gets some child time and we meet 'the Them' except they are not 'the Them'. Brian, Pepper and Wensleydale are a friend group and they try to talk to Adam because Pepper wants to be friends with him ( I think the intention was to make Pepper and Adam as THING but idk) . But Adam wants nothing to do with them and instead just wants his peace and quite. So he gets insulted for not having a father and sulks off.

Anathema has also arrived at the scene. And has a culture shock bc of the lackluster infrastructure out here. She arrives in Tadfield with some difficulties and now has to somehow find a place to stay. And while the town seemed overrun with places renting out rooms it also has a case of outdated world views and nobody is willing to take Anathema in for some reason or the other. She eventually gets pointed into the direction of Madam Tracy. Where she is informed that she can have a room . And Madam Tracy casually dunks on Picasso which I can support.

Anathema then repeatedly runs into Adam and tries to strike up a conversation but he just doesn't want to and runs off. As both of them eventually go home at the end of the day he accuses her of following him, since they both are taking the same path. As he gets told that Anathema also lives at the same address as him now he gets angry and stroms to Madam Tracy, disrupting a seance to scold her for taking on a lodger without his approval. He is angry that Madam Tracy is so reckless taking in people without proper background check.

Following that, Adam interviews Anathema. And they bond .

At night Adam sneaks off to the pier and we learn that he has build a model of Tadfield in an abandoned arcade.

He and Anathema bond a bit more over breakfast. (And honestly I like that version of them more relationship wise. As much as I love Prattchet, he did have a particular style of writing children that also came through in Gomens . It lends itself great to hypotheticals and punchlines, not so much for interpersonal relationships)

Back to Crowley and Aziraphale. Last time Crowley had been hopeful and appreciative of the angel. Well now he is running out of time and he is getting grumpy and down in the dumps and ready to give up. While Aziraphale is still unrelentingly optimistic. Poly makes an other entrance, Crowley puzzles together an ancient Etruscan pott. All riveting stuff.

Shadwell, or what's left of his character makes a short appearance as 'MAD OLD MAN' shouting and standing on a soap box as set dressing for Crowley to buy a newspaper and... Pay for it . (Honestly I would have not expected HIM to pay for anything)

He gets zapped into hell without notice.

(Side note Miss Ashtoreth is mentioned as secretary of Satan himself.)

Satan wants to check up on his son's progress. Crowley is shitting himself and lies, reassuring Satan that the boy is properly evil and all that . Of course Satan wants to see the boy real soon and tells Crowley to tell the boy that he is ready for when the boy wants to see him. And after taking a look at Adam by rearranging the universe itself to show a likeness in the stars (hell is a very surreal space with an office above the pit and direct view of all of the universe) Crowley gets zapped back to earth. (Also Satan calls Crowley 'Crawler' which is the script version of Crowley's name change, probably)

Crowley Is now properly stressed out.

On the other end of London (probably) Aziraphale's Crowley senses tingle and he just starts running (presumably) towards Crowley. This never gets brought up or explained. And is so bizarre I couldn't skip it.

Back in Tadfield Adam and Pepper get a bit of a bonding moment. Talking about action figures, Pepper giving Adam a lecture about not being sexist , getting fish and chips. The topic of Adams lack of a father gets brought up again and he lies. Telling Pepper he had met his father before and his father is some sort of international business man, that meets with presidents and is very busy. Eventually Pepper asks about Anathema and tries to convince Adam to take her (pepper) to the movies.

Back in London one Angel apparently unable to use public transport arrives at the nightclub. We can assume that he had been running the whole way. He gets pointed towards Crowley by multiple staff members, 'Every day' gets another cameo and he accidentally stumbles into the dressing room for the waiting staff, which is very embarrassing for him but not for the women.

When he reaches Crowley's office, the demon doesn't want to talk. He is panicking and packing to go on the run for the rest of eternity. (Which for him just means a suitcase full of sunglasses) . What follows is the infamous dialogue script!Crowley get his reputation from. (I might make myself very unpopular here but I think that reputation is not quite deserved. Yes he is an asshole but also the harsher exchanges only play out when he is stressed/panicked and usually if he goes too far he will try and paddel back. Still worst of the Crowleys without a doubt just not quite as bad as people like to paint him. Also script!Aziraphale isn't half as naive and helpless as people like to paint him either and in this house we let him have his agency! But also more on that later)

The exchange switches tone once Aziraphale lets his unbreakable optimism fallter and gets sad. To which Crowley immediately reacts bc trying to reassure him that they are in fact friends and that he shouldn't be sorry. Pointing out that he (Crowley) now knows what the boy looks like to counteract Aziraphale's pessimistic statement that they could never have found the boy bc they didn't even know what he looks like. They agree to hit one more town in their search for the boy.

In Tadfield Anathema finally gets to talk about her quest to find the SOMETHING with Madam Tracy. And have her witness a fight between Brian and Adam about Adam's father. (Srly Adam gets constantly bullied bc of that.) Anathema steps between the two to protect Adam. They make a deal to tell each other's secrets. First we get Anathema showing Adam stuff about the antichrist and the weapon she plans on killing him with.

Then we get an intermission with Crowley and Aziraphale discussing how they should choose which town to go to. They decide with a dart throw.

Back with Adam and Anathema. Adam shows Anathema his model of Tadfield. To the question what he plans on doing once that model is done, he tells her, he is going to build the rest of the world and rule over it. He also voices his desire to go somewhere else so he is no longer stuck in Tadfield.

Aziraphale and Crowley arrive in Tadfield during a Thunderstorm and face the same problem as Anathema. No one wants to rent them a room in town. And while with Anathema the whole thing was rooted in sexism, disdain for outsiders (aka read as Americans) and misunderstandings about her occupation, for those two it's the obligatory 'People think they are a gay couple' thing but with a giant side of Homophobia.

Crowley want to give up, Aziraphale want to go on and eventually they end up at Madam Tracy's.

Madam Tracy mistakes them for the gas person, Crowley wants separate rooms, Aziraphale a shared one,(we never get to know which they now took bc the script has both, scenes with a shared room and with a separate rooms. It could also be that Crowley simply stays longer than Aziraphale and therefore the shared room becomes his single room. At any rate it is never specified. And to be honest there are multiple parts of the script where the author very obviously had given up on it , soooo) Crowley praises Aziraphale's skill as homemaker, Madam Tracy tells them, they have to wait for Adam. Adam comes home Crowley recognizes the boy.

Crowley and Aziraphale take a stroll on the beach and come to the agreement that each should spend a day with the boy, despite Crowley trying to avoid having Aziraphale influence the kid. They also witness how Brian's father is getting things set up and ready to tear down the pier.

In the evening they play an other game of checkers. Adam witnessing first hand Crowley's cheating as he gets the both of them to have dinner with the whole house.

At the dinner table they convince Madame Tracey to let them take Adam to London for a day. Adam being obviously overjoyed about the whole thing.

Anathema sees Aziraphale's and Crowley's true nature for a sec. And I am sorry if this part comes across as rather dry, it's also rather dry in the script.

Adam gets taken to London. First Aziraphale get to show him the museum and talk about human creations . (Side note , when I first got my hands on the script I thought I was missing a page bc the dialogue has a really awkward jump in this scene but no ... It's supposed to be like that and either it was the author giving up or it was supposed to be a kid thing. Jumping from one topic to the next with not much logic. We will never know)

Adam then confronts Aziraphale about Crowley's cheating. And here comes the part why I will never see script!Aziraphale as truly naive or helpless. Aziraphale admits to Adam that he had always known Crowley cheated, he just thought it virtuous to not point it out. Bc he played fair and in his mind that was enough to stand above the other and win in a sense and just let him do the cheating. Adam points out how it's stupid, and that was that. Aziraphale is stunned and does what most people with too much money and no idea how to handle kids do, exactly drag him somewhere, where he can buy shit.

Next up is Crowley. First he drags Adam to Soho. Not Good Omens there might be a cozy bookshop somewhere Soho but well 90s it's a bit of a cess pool Soho. With hookers and homeless teenage girls ( and for all those people that take Crowley being displeased with Adam for giving the girl some change as point to call him fundamentally mean/bad... I implore you learn what character motivations are. He has been tasked with raising an evil child, has promised an evil child, obviously he is displeased when that child is doing something selfless. And he wouldn't do something selfless in the presence of said child either bc again he is supposed to influence him towards evil) Crowley then gets him a milkshake and takes him to his club where they have the mirror conversation to Aziraphale's. Ending with Adam pointing out that it is pretty boring to always win for the wins sake by the means of cheating.

On the way back they have a short (also very old couple and married) conversation about their respective experiences with the boy. Accidentally letting it slip that they know who Adam's father is, believing the boy to be asleep. He is not.

That night Anathema finally succeeds in her endeavor of finding the antichrist. Her crystal ball revealing to her that it is indeed Adam. She is so shocked by that, that she lets the ball fall but luckily for her Aziraphale does his thing and it lands safely without breaking. (That another quirk of the script apparently Anathema and Aziraphale were supposed to be something and what ever that is, it's even weirder than Adam and Pepper)

Madam Tracy also finally recognized Crowley from THAT night and they have a honest heart to heart. Or whatever you call it when the otherwise always woozy character suddenly seem lucid and aware of what will happen.

That night Adam goes to Anathema for emotional support bc of the father thing. Anathema however is in the middle of a crisis bc she now knows what Adam is and had tried to get herself ready to murder him but struggles with herself to do it. Eventually Adam notices the knife behind her back and with the first flair of his antichrist powers forces her to show it to him before storming off hurt.

Being emotionally distraught he runs to his hideout on the pier and calls out to his feather. First nothing happens but then after Adam went off the pier and back again it is completely transformed into a bright happy carnival. His Father has arrived. Satan immediately takes Adam under his wings . He even dresses him up as a mini self.

The next morning the whole town of Tadfield is one giant carnival. There is a parade with elephants. And the people from around town are all mindlessly attending the celebration.

Crowley has a short meeting with Satan (on an elephant can't stress that enough) and gets told that he is supposed to come to Satan to talk about his promotion to alpha centauri. AND

( Don't ask me why I find this too funny to not share, my humor is very broken )

The town is being further transformed and more people are made mindless puppets. But now Crowley is happy to have gotten away with his stunt. He is roleplaying flirting with someone in a mirror. (Also in the script notes it literally says James Bond for acting directions for Crowley, and that's such a dorky idea I love the theory of it ... Bit of a waste in this tho).

Aziraphale tries to change his mind but Crowley shuts him down by pointing out that he was the one saying happiness alone is making things a good deed so it shouldn't matter if people have to be made into mindless puppets first. They are happy after all.

Meanwhile Adam is torturing Brian by throwing tomatoes hat him and having the rest of the town join in with the fun. He just wants his father to be proud of him (nawww ) (that naw was sarcastic). In the crowd Anathema is fighting to regain control over herself.

Aziraphale still tries to convince Crowley. Tugging at his heart strings but even the tried and true "I thought we are friends" won't work this time. Crowley wants to seize his opportunity, he wants out and up.

While those two are arguing, Anathema struggles. All she wants it the knife but she is exhausted.

Crowley is looking for a starting point for his launch towards alpha centauri. He is climbing onto a church tower. Behind him Aziraphale still hasn't given up. Despite not liking heights (!? Wasn't mentioned before will not be mentioned again but apparently script!Aziraphale has a fear of heights). He finally gets an idea and challenges Crowley to one last match.

Crowley for once doesn't cheat and it looks like he is about to win but then Aziraphale DOES cheat, desperate to keep Crowley on earth and have him fight at his side. And Crowley just shrugs and accepts. His next line after acknowledging the win already calls Satan his ex-boss and if that is not a very impressive 180° turn then I don't know what is. (Just a throw back to character motivation, we could speculate it's because most of what Crowley has said were lies and half truths and deep down he actually likes earth and bla or he just remembered how much he would miss his nightclub BUT I as number one script!Crowley (not really) defender say ... It's just unfinished/bad writing and there simply wasn't enough time or inspiration or whatever to finish his character ark)

Anathema manages to give both of them the knife. Crowley is so idiotic and tries to grab it but it burns him . I mean, duhh! Anathema literally tells them that this knife can hurt the antichrist why should it be harmless for a way lesser demon? So Aziraphale takes the knife.

After calling Crowley his best friend, Crowley himself calling himself stupid, Aziraphale, presumably (presumably is important here) with the knife, goes off to confront Adam. He tried to talk Adam out of it. Trying to point out that no good father leaves his kid alone for eleven years and if this is really what Adam wants. As he points out that Madam Tracy despite all her flaws still love Adam he gets discorporated, by Adam. But bc this is a Movie script and we don't have much time left he just stays in his true angel form (which is very much just white robes , wings and halo ) right where he is, further trying to talk Adam out of it .

(here is an other line in my mounting pile of evidence that script! Aziraphale is neither naive nor helpless and simply chooses to carry himself that way bc he thinks it's virtuous. He literally acknowledges that people can do bad things. Something he would not do at any point before that in the script. I rest my case )

While Aziraphale is trying to make Adam think about things, Crowley is off confronting Satan, presumably without the knife.

Satan acknowledges that Crowley had lied to him but is still in such a good mood that he still wants to give out the promotion. Even throws in the titel of fiend extraordinar. For a moment it seems like Crowley considers but ultimately he tells Satan that he wants to quit. Satan is not happy about that and after Crowley also pulls out a pink rubber glove and the knife (yhea Crowley had the knife all along , take that continuity or rather scree logic, like not showing how they get a rubber glove is fine, what ever but having the last scene with the knife be the one where it's shown that he can't touch it and Aziraphale had to carry it would have made it feel a bit too deus ex machina.) Satan forces him into half snake form and summens hands that try and drag him back to hell.

Thanks to his already established Crowley senses (probably ) Aziraphale suddenly shows up and charges at Satan. Who in turn is like 'An angel, really? You betrayed me,..' and then roasts Aziraphale to a crisp before destroying the knife .

Adam confronted with a robotic acting madam Tracy, listening to his every command, starts to reflect on his actions. Getting called in by his father to greed the four horsepersons he notices Aziraphale and Crowley.

Adam now faced with all the destruction says: no, I am not doing it. Stan tries to threaten him into obeying but he gets the good old 'You not my dad'. For being a deadbeat for 11 years. Adam then heals Aziraphale and frees Crowley. Now flanked by the two Adam banishes the horseman.

Satan demanding obedience once more, gets reminded by Crowley that he himself once rebelled. And after laughing about that revelation he tells Adam that it was interesting meeting him but as it seemed he wasn't cut out to be a dad. To Crowley he says that he is now banned from hell and to Aziraphale that he should tell his boss, that at least his son (the antichrist) had more guts than his(Jesus and yes the script sadly uses he/him for God).

After Satan vanishes they have to escape a collapsing pier. Noticing too late that Madam Tracy is also still there. Adam ends up releasing her from her trance by calling her mom and telling her that he loves her. Aziraphale ends up saving both of them, flying them to safety on the beach.

At the beach they also meet Anathema, who promises not to kill him, and Pepper . They watch as the pier explodes and burns to the ground. Anathema also has uncomfortable eye contact with Aziraphale while he ripples back into human form . (Don't ask me why it feels uncomfortable, Anathema is described as looking tens while he still full angel and softening once he is human again, so idk)

Apropos Anathema and Aziraphale. The next Morning, he comes to say goodbye and ends up offering a job bc (I forgot to mention it when it happened) Polly, his assistant had a promotion. So he is in search for a new assistant. She end up kissing him on the cheek and calling him angel but in a way where it's ambiguous if she now knows that he is one or if she just thinks he is a good person and something always makes her forget what he really is. At any rate Aziraphale says he had never gotten a kiss on the cheek in six thousand years and knowing a bit about history and cultural practices I am inclined to calling him a liar. But then again this is fiction .... So sure ... Cheek kiss virgin this one.

While that is happening Madam Tracy is asking Crowley if she can keep the boy now . And Crowley reassures her, that after this, no one is going to come for him. He even offers to throw a birthday party for her at his club, all she should do is to just to look after the boy. It's actually a very sweet exchange.

Outside Brian and Adam have a little exchange, Brain trying once more to get to Adam with the father thing. But Adam has no daddy issues anymore. Instead he asks Pepper out to the movies and Brian just tags along without being asked. Where is Wensleydale you asking ? Take your best guess, he was mentioned once said one thing and then fell off the earth. He probably exploded with the pier and nobody even remembers.

With the kids now finally as a group we have the last shot of Aziraphale and Crowley. They are walking along the street , Crowley one stolen apple in hand . Having their talk about good and evil. Accusing each other of being a little bit of a good person (press x to boubt) and just enough of a bastard (oh absolutely). How they both knew the other was cheating all along. And maybe alpha centauri isn't such a good idea after all. You can't even get booze there. The last thing that is said is Aziraphale telling Crowley to 'not start THAT again', after being offered the apple.

I lied one more screenshot bc Every ...it had been for told by the cursed script for ages now. (I am pretty sure it had been in the talks to put go to Every day' even before the script was ordered so that is just a joke)

At any rate I do have to go to work in ....eh three hours ... So I will leave it at the summary for now. I am dyslexic and English mu second language so I am very sorry for all the mistakes I probably made . If someone reblogs this before I get the chance to correct them, let it be said that at least nobody can claim this is ai pfff.

Also not I said the name of the author the two times I mentioned him simply bc I don't feel like acknowledging the name of the person. I got into Gomens bc of Sir Terry and I stay here for him. This little obsession with the shit script happened by pure chance and purely against my will pfff

[whatsupwalnut]

Painland Week Day 2: Myths/Legends

@ deathsankh: lmao does Edwin Payne rly think i cant see him 😂

@ deathsankh: poor kid’s been in hell for 73 years and he comes right back to school? NERD

@ deathsankh: omg he made a friend, i love this for him

@ deathsankh: his lil friend is cute but imma let them cook 🙏

@ deathsankh: bumped into the boys again today, they brought me an offering

@ deathsankh: little girl didnt know she was dead, poor thing

@ deathsankh: i can’t share deets (thanks hipaa) but she died in her apartment and she’s been stuck there for decades

@ deathsankh: they played a game with her and suddenly her soul is calling to me??? okay boys, go offff

@ deathsankh: they thought i couldnt see them BEHIND A DESK lmaooooo 

@ deathsankh: these new kids crack me up

@ deathsankh: the dead boys are still in that apartment, they can’t hide for shit

@ deathsankh: 🏅 congrats to the worst to ever do it 🏅

@ deathsankh: they sent me two more souls in the past month and they’re still scared of me

@deathsankh: we’re colleagues now darlings, have fun out there 💅

@ deathsankh: stop, the little dead boys

@ deathsankh: im obsessed

@ deathsankh: they started a “detective agency” and ive gotten like 16 tributes from them so far

@ deathsankh: and get this

@ deathsankh: they’re calling it

@ deathsankh: THE DEAD BOYS DETECTIVE AGENCY 😂😂

@ deathsankh: like that’s not gunna attract attention from the afterlife

@ deathsankh: i put my contacts on notice, hands off unless they go thru me

@ deathsankh: the night nurse could be a problem but who’s gunna say no to me 💅

@ deathsankh: these boys are lucky i like they, they literally freed a ghost IN THEIR OFFICE tonight

@ deathsankh: like im not gunna sense them hiding on the windowsill 🙄

@ deathsankh: i should have said BOO right before i took Wilfred 😂 but u know im too profesh

@ deathsankh: i guess the dead boy detectives got spooked bc now they’re in port townsend??? 

@ deathsankh: BITCH IM EVERYWHERE 😂😂

@ deathsankh: i gotta call my girl Lilith, she was out there last time we spoke and it’s been too long

@ deathsankh: their little friend kinda reminds me of her

@ deathsankh: these boys stay getting themselves into situations ong

@ deathsankh: i cant talk specifics but that dad was a piece of work

@ deathsankh: im only sorry i couldnt get to him myself.

@ deathsankh: Lilith is Not Doing Well, please reach out if you have her info 🙏

@ deathsankh: shit is POPPING OFF in port townsend

@ deathsankh: why cant these kids take a proper holiday

@ deathsankh: night nurse is ON MY ASS like i don’t already know about this

@ deathsankh: she takes this shit too seriously lmao

@ deathsankh: YO

@ deathsankh: HELL????

@ deathsankh: HITTING UP MY CONTACTS ASAP @DESPAIR KEEP AN EYE OUT FOR A SAD NERDY KID IN UNDERWEAR YOU’LL KNOW THE ONE

@ deathsankh: oh shit what up @simonpages 

@ deathsankh: Thank you to everyone who reached out to Lilith, including the dead boy’s little friend! She’s doing much better now and hell has a new resident :) 

@ deathsankh: NOT LILITH lmao my bad 😂

@ deathsankh: the boys are out of hell but everyone is still sad??? they said their neighbor died but i didnt hear anything? mods????????????????????????????????????

@ deathsankh: this one is out of my jurisdiction gl out there boys 🫡

@ deathsankh: whole squad is back in London

@ deathsankh: the medium’s parents are annoying i need to give them a buzz…

@ deathsankh: NOT LIKE THAT u know i can’t take ppl before their time, but like…

@ deathsankh: they need a lil reminder that im coming :) 

@ deathsankh: i gotta take the night nurse out for drinks bc she is STRUGGLING @ThePrincipal u crazy for this one queen 😂😂 girls night soon?

@ deathsankh: fr tho does nn think i look at all that paperwork bc LMAO

@ deathsankh: the tweedy one loves it tho have fun king

@ deathsankh: like im not gunna approve the asylum paperwork sksksksks

@ deathsankh: omg they got the news and the whole squad is crying in the club 

@ deathsankh: even the night nurse lmao im never letting her live this down

@ deathsankh: maybe i shouldnt have delivered the news personally, i think i almost killed the boys again 😬 my bad yall

@ deathsankh: was anyone surprised the curly one kissed the tweedy one when i told them 😂

@ deathsankh: took them long enough tbh 😻

[diorsluv]

feather , christmas special

“ all i want for christmas is you ”

series m. list

nhl + umich x platonic!drysdale!reader,

luke hughes x fem!reader,

temporary male!oc x fem!reader

( socialmedia!au )

jamie.drysdale

liked by yourusername, dylanduke25, lhughes_06, and 58,021 others

jamie.drysdale happy 20th birthday lil sis..

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

edwards.73 aww you were best friends when you were kids…. what happened

→ jamie.drysdale she got too annoying

→ yourusername he became “one of the boys” 🙄

yourusername u dont seem too happy abt me turning 20

→ jamie.drysdale ur one year away from being 21 and that means i have to take care of u when u get drunk

→ trevorzegras he started crying to me about how he didn’t want you to grow up

→ jamie.drysdale LIES trevorzegras

username63 I AM SOBBING SO HARD RN THIS IS TOO CUTE

markestapa thanks for the childhood pics that i def won’t post when she least expects it

→ jamie.drysdale anytime 🫡

→ yourusername HEY HEY NO

_alexturcotte

liked by jackhughes, yourusername, trevorzegras, and 32,332 others

_alexturcotte happy birthday to miss mini drysdale and i hope you enjoyed your photoshoot (i took all the pics) 🥳🥳

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

yourusername my own personal photographer 🥰

→ _alexturcotte you’re lucky you’re my fav girl

→ yourusername AWWW STOP ITTT

colecaufield yes and i brought the props

luca.fantilli i don’t think you should trust her with a torch

→ yourusername I’M VERY RESPONSIBLE

username49 THE TIARAAAA

username57 i love how they all post her at the same exact time

jackhughes be careful, remember how her dress lit on fire last time?

→ yourusername THAT WAS YOU THO????

→ _quinnhughes but it was kinda your fault jack

→ lhughes_06 dude YOU were the one that dropped a lit candle on her skirt

→ jackhughes okay i didn’t need you to gang up on me 😟

rutgermcgroarty

likes by yourusername, adamfantilli, colecaufield, and 59,795 others

rutgermcgroarty happy birthday to the best drysdale 🍰

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

yourusername aw i AM the best drysdale 🥱

→ rutgermcgroarty ok now dont gotta get all cocky about it

username54 all the phones 😭😭

username25 the second pic is giving best girl energy

adamfantilli that cake genuinely scared the shit out of me

→ yourusername it’s just sparklers 🙄

markestapa you made us sing happy birthday for her 6 times.

→ rutgermcgroarty well you all sounded bad

→ mackie.samo you were the one that was off key tho???

username38 her bday looks so funnn

colecaufield

liked by trevorzegras, jackhughes, yourusername, and 45,239 others

colecaufield happy birthday even tho we don’t see each other enough so i had to use pics from your 18th birthday 😒

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

_alexturcotte imagine not being able to see her

→ colecaufield ok little buddy you don’t see her any more than i do

→ jackhughes literally could not be me (it’s torture)

yourusername I’LL COME TO SEE YOU MORE OFTEN COUGH SYRUP 🥰🥰

→ colecaufield i take it back i don’t want you coming near me

→ trevorzegras i started “cough syrup” u gotta give me credits

→ yourusername no i did it first stop trying to steal my genius ideas

username36 the heart shaped balloon is adorableee

luca.fantilli her 18th bday was 🔥🔥

→ lhughes_06 bro u werent even there

→ edwards.73 u didnt even know her

→ yourusername it’s okay guys he just wants to fit in #fomo

_quinnhughes

liked by luca.fantilli, yourusername, rutgermcgroarty, and 75,239 others

_quinnhughes i helped secretly decorate her apartment for her 20th birthday and you didn’t. we are not the same 🥱🥱

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

yourusername since when did you start bragging about me

→ _quinnhughes since rn

→ yourusername i’ll take it ig……

username47 THE FLOWERS AAAAA

username19 guys have you noticed how dead silent booker’s been

→ username58 fr he hasn’t commented at all or posted anything abt her 😭

jackhughes i helped too

→ _quinnhughes shut up no u didnt

→ yourusername let him have his moment jack, he doesn’t get a lot of them

dylanduke25

liked by yourusername, adamfantilli, mackie.samo, and 24,136 others

dylanduke25 took her out to eat then surprised her with the best pizza she’s ever eaten for her bday 💪

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

mackie.samo your handwriting is atrocious

→ dylanduke25 wbk tell me something i don’t know 🙄

username34 oh! candles on pizza!

username15 mcdonalds on ur bday >>>>>

yourusername the pizza was cold asf but that’s okay!!!!!!

→ dylanduke25 hard as a rock

→ markestapa WOAHHH THERE DUKER 🤨🤨

→ dylanduke25 bro stop making it weird

→ lhughes_06 fr

trevorzegras they always say the way to a woman’s heart is through food

→ yourusername but do they say that tho….??

username93 best gift ever frfr

markestapa

liked by yourusername, edwards.73, lhughes_06, and 65,297 others

markestapa HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIL DRIZZY

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

yourusername OH MY FUCKING GOD. THIS IS THE BEST ONE YET LMFAOOOO

→ markestapa LETS FUCKING GO I WIN

mackie.samo goddammit i knew i should’ve done this instead

→ markestapa loserrrr

username32 oh my……

_quinnhughes what the hell is this

jamie.drysdale i’m ashamed to say i think you know my sister better than i do

→ markestapa no no her edward cullen phase was a difficult time for all of us

→ jamie.drysdale i’ve blocked out all the trauma

→ yourusername you’re all haters

trevorzegras

liked by jamie.drysdale, _quinnhughes, yourusername, and 89,027 others

trevorzegras i spent 5 hours secretly decorating and making these cupcakes and i survived all the weird stares i got for walking straight past the christmas section SO BE GRATEFUL. oh and happy birthday i guess

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

yourusername i was so confused why jack and quinn wouldn’t let me in my own room for those five hours.. but yes yes i’m so grateful AND THE CUPCAKES ARE MAGNIFICENT

→ trevorzegras at least SOMEONE appreciates my efforts

→ _alexturcotte trevor you almost popped like half the balloons from blowing them up too much

username61 why did i just now realize that her birthday is on christmas

colecaufield wait i thought ian somerhalder was supposed to be on one of the cupcakes

→ trevorzegras who???

→ trevorzegras OH THE HOT GUY FROM THE BLOODSUCKER SHOW

→ yourusername fr i was kinda expecting tom blyth too but it’s okay

username30 LOUIS PARTRIDGEEEE

mackie.samo

liked by lhughes_06, yourusername, adamfantilli, and 53,928 others

mackie.samo i tried going the “aesthetic” route for u but clearly u like the rob pattinson ones more 🙄🙄 happy birthday mini drysdale

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

yourusername BUT YOU HELPED WITH THE SURPRISE PARTY AND I LOVE THAT SO MUCH MORE

→ mackie.samo HAHA IN UR FACE markestapa

→ markestapa WHAT NO I HELPED WITH THE PARTY TOO

_quinnhughes the amount of tiaras we’ve given her is concerning

→ yourusername i like them thoughhh ☺️

→ jamie.drysdale you know how she is with her tiaras

→ yourusername I STOPPED WEARING THEM WHEN I WAS 8 AND YOU KNOW THAT

username57 the way it’s turned into a competition 💀

edwards.73

liked by markestapa, adamfantilli, yourusername, and 57,294 others

edwards.73 pics from the birthday girl’s afterparty bc everyone else is unoriginal

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

yourusername wait til you see jack’s post 😭

→ edwards.73 wait WHAT

username44 good lord how many parties are there lmaooo

→ yourusername you don’t even wanna know

jackhughes oh please you weren’t even there for the pre-party

→ edwards.73 WHAT PRE-PARTY??

→ yourusername don’t worry ethan i didn’t know about it either until i was there 😭😭

→ edwards.73 how come i wasn’t invited 😒

trevorzegras since when was there an afterparty???????

→ yourusername yeah i don’t think they invited you..

→ trevorzegras WHO??

→ yourusername uhh mark, mackie, moosey, duker, rut, luca and adam

→ jackhughes it’s fine z they weren’t invited to the pre-party anyway

luca.fantilli

liked by yourusername, lhughes_06, mackie.samo, and 85,872 others

luca.fantilli more pics of this kid at her afterparty 🤷‍♂️ happy 20th birthday

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

edwards.73 ur actually so unoriginal

→ yourusername he idolizes u 🤩🤩🤩

→ luca.fantilli shut up

username12 wait that cake is so cool

username47 new tiara every post LMAO

yourusername “this kid” is crazy

→ luca.fantilli i am older than u tho

→ yourusername NOT EVEN BY A YEAR

→ luca.fantilli I’M LIKE 5 DAYS OFF

jackhughes

liked by _quinnhughes, yourusername, trevorzegras, and 94,782 others

jackhughes happy birthday to our christmas girl (our pre-party was on christmas eve) 🥳🥳

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

yourusername i think i maxxed out my cake consumption

→ jackhughes good thing you ate our cake first

username27 are you telling me she had THREE parties 😦

→ yourusername yes. THREE of them.

→ username27 girl you are stronger than i’ll ever be

edwards.73 wtvvv the pre-party sounds like it was lame

→ lhughes_06 ngl it might’ve been better than the afterparty

→ dylanduke25 LUKE YOU WERE AT THE PRE-PARTY????

→ lhughes_06 oops

username16 birthday princess turned birthday queen i loveeeeee

adamfantilli

liked by jamie.drysdale, luca.fantilli, yourusername, and 48,396 others

adamfantilli HAPPY BIRTHDAY LIL DRIZZ! i hope you enjoy your birthday and that baby pic i definitely didn’t steal from your brother

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

username34 jamie has started the attack of the baby pics

yourusername the shrek photos 😦😦 my sweet sweet adam what have they done to you

→ adamfantilli many many things 😔

markestapa im ngl 4 year old lil drizzy was dripped out

→ adamfantilli fr

→ yourusername FR

→ jamie.drysdale no… no she wasn’t

username6 i need someone to post shrek on my birthday

luca.fantilli i can’t believe you posted two whole pics of her on her bday

→ yourusername you’re just toooooo funny 😒

lhughes_06

liked by yourusername, _quinnhughes, edwards.73, and 97,290 others

lhughes_06 hit em with the annual birthday sleepover 🥱 happy 20th birthday lil drizzy, ur finally my age

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

yourusername i’ve always been your age 🙄

→ lhughes_06 mmmm but barely

→ yourusername I EXPECTED MORE FROM YOU

→ lhughes_06 i bought you $200 worth of gifts u just havent opened them all yet

username72 HE GAVE HER A FULL CROWN INSTEAD OF A TIARA AW

jackhughes she stopped letting me and quinn sleep over when we turned 13 but how come u still get to do it 🤨

→ lhughes_06 i’m the favorite

→ yourusername wbk tbh

username84 THE POSSIBILITIES ARE LOW BUT NEVER ZERO

rutgermcgroarty is that why you kicked the rest of us out after the afterparty 😞

→ lhughes_06 yes

→ yourusername can’t break tradition!

_quinnhughes hey hey no funny business alright

→ lhughes_06 bro she has a literal bf

→ yourusername all we do is gossip and give each other facials

→ lhughes_06 DON’T SAY THAT yourusername

→ luca.fantilli luke do you have something to tell us���?

username75 luke is secretly a girl

→ username12 or secretly a simp

→ username71 i dont think hes “secretly” any of those things 😭😭

yourusername

liked by lhughes_06, jamie.drysdale, colecaufield, and 99,117 others

yourusername thank you to everyone who wished me a happy birthday and to everyone who celebrated me turning 20 years old!! and ofc thank you to a certain someone who always stays up until exactly 12 am to wish me happy birthday first 🫢 also merry christmas and happy holidays, i love you all mwahhhh!

view all comments

jackhughes i wonder who that someone could be 🤔

→ trevorzegras huh i think their name seemed to have slipped my mind

→ _alexturcotte it’s so weird usually i don’t forget

→ colecaufield i can’t believe none of us can remember

→ _quinnhughes you’re all painfully obvious

lhughes_06 wow the special shoutout 😱

→ yourusername ik ur just so lucky

username26 so let’s run it back to booker and the fact that he’s been completely silent throughout ALL of this

→ username48 fr like where is bro

username3 isn’t that the crown luke gave her

mackie.samo we’ll throw an even better party next year

→ yourusername i’m looking forward to it 🫣

notes ) so.. i actually struggled trying to find good pics and ALMOST NONE OF THEM MATCH EACH OTHER lmaooo but yes here is the christmas special i promised and ik no one posts actual insta posts for someone elses bday but it was more fun writing it that way n i hope u all like it!! (lightly proofread so if there are any mistakes i apologize 😭)

tags: @aliaology @hockeyboysarehot

[whyse7vn]

GHOSTED -

[ ot7 x reader ]

YOONGI -

yoongi: hey

sent 6 hours ago

yoongi: bro

sent 1 hour ago

yoongi: *babe

yoongi: hello?

y/n: yes

yoongi: oh

y/n: ???

yoongi: are we fighting?

y/n: no?

yoongi: so just fuck me then?

y/n: pretty much

yoongi: no one loves you

sent 30mins ago

yoongi: ur annoying me

y/n: hiii babe

yoongi: what is ur problem?

y/n: what?

yoongi: i have a gun to my head

y/n: don’t shoot?

yoongi: why is that a question?

y/n: cuz i’m not sure

yoongi: not sure about what?

y/n: if i want you to shoot or not

yoongi: why have you been taking so long to respond?

y/n: omgee do you miss me???

yoongi: not anymore

y/n: YOU DO?????

ur so cute

yoongi: whatever

sent 10 mins ago

yoongi: okay now ur doing it on purpose

could literally be bleeding out rn and ur ignoring me

sent 20 mins ago

yoongi: all together you’ve ignored me for 8 hours

y/n: i don’t like math

yoongi: i don’t like being ignored

y/n: was busy

yoongi: liar

y/n: i’m being honest you big baby omg!

yoongi: i am not a baby that’s gross

you would literally be in prison rn if i was

y/n: you don’t need to take everything i say literally

yoongi: you didn’t need to ignore me

y/n: i’m here now

what do you want?

yoongi: what do i want????

are you trying to break up with me rn?

y/n: and if i was??

yoongi: i’m not speaking to you rn

y/n: ok

yoongi: this is the part where you beg for my forgiveness

HOSEOK -

hobi: you can’t tell anyone but you know that argument jin and jimin had last week?

sent 5 mins ago

hobi: the one where jin threw his shoe at jimin?

sent 5 mins ago

hobi: anyways it was actually my fault

it wasn’t jimin who ate those strawberry tart things it was me

jin asked me who ate them and i said jimin

just for funzies

and i knew he would believe it

i was gonna say ur name but jin would of let you off to easy

don’t tell ANYONE

i’m fr

tarts were good as hell tho

10/10

hope he gets some more

idk where their from so i fr pray he buys more

sent 3 hours ago

hobi: ANSWER ME

why are you ignoring me 😓?

y/n: bored as hell

hobi: ???

y/n: was bored as hell?

hobi: so you ignored me??

y/n: yeah??

hobi: are you mentally ill?

y/n: possibly?

hobi: gws?

y/n: thanks?

hobi: why do you hate me?

y/n: are you truma dumping rn?

hobi: you are my truma

y/n: truma by seventeen

hobi: i love seventeen

y/n: so do i

hobi: let’s hang out with seventeen

y/n: i agree

hobi: aju nice

y/n: clap clap clap clap

hobi: why do you hate me?

y/n: thought we were moving on from this tbh

hobi: bored as hell is not an good excuse for ignoring me

y/n: it’s like we take 2 steps forward then 13 steps back

hobi: 13 just seventeen

y/n: did that just for them

hobi: ur kinda funny

y/n: thx

hobi: stop distracting me omg?

y/n: sorry

won’t do it again

hobi: why do you hate me?

y/n: if we think about it you’re the mentality ill one in this relationship

hobi: ok that’s a lie

ur a sociopath

y/n: you don’t even know what that means

hobi: i so do

y/n: what does it mean then

hobi: ur abnormal

y/n: fuck you

hobi: it’s okay love my little sociopath 🥰

y/n: …

hobi: the next time you ignore me i’m leaving you

sent 4 hours ago

JIMIN -

jimin: hello there something seems to be wrong with the hand break of my car

can you send anyone out to fix it

📎 3 imagines attached

sent 5 mins ago

jimin: pls i need some to fix it asap

📎 1 video attached

sent 3 mins ago

jimin: this is REALLY REALLY important pls i need to be somewhere in the next two hours

sent 1 hour ago

jimin: THIS IS LIFE OR DEATH

y/n: ew

that is your dick

jimin: when can you send someone out 😖

y/n: get lost

jimin: :((((

sent 1 hour ago

jimin: um okay….

sent 2 hours ago

jimin: yoongi just said i’m “so desperate” in the gc and if he’s talking about what i think he is i will NEVER talk to you again

sent 5 mins ago

jimin: ur lucky

he wasn’t talking about that

sent 4 mins ago

jimin: HEY

4 missed calls from jimin

jimin: fine be like that…

sent 20 mins ago

jimin: thought about it and

idc if the boys see my dick!!

SHOW IT TO THEM IF YOU WANT

I AM NOT ASHAMED

sent 10 mins ago

jimin: STOP IGNORING ME OMG????

2 missed calls from jimin

jimin: i am an example to men fuck you die

y/n: joon laughed and called you a slut

jimin: #slut4myqueen

wait he laughed?????

tf is he laughing for???

4 missed calls from jimin

jimin: HELLLO COME BSCK RN

YOU DONT GET TO SAY THAT AND GHOST ME AGAIN

HELLOOOOO HELLOOO HELLLO GELLO

HELOOEOD

incoming call from jimin…

JUNGKOOK -

y/n: YOU WANNA SEE MY NEW DRESS

jungkook: PLS PLS PLS

SEND PICS

sent 10 mins ago

CAN I JUST FT YOU?

sent 10 mins ago

ANSWERRRRRRR

20 missed calls from jungkook

sent 14 hours ago

jungkook: it’s a new day and i have a knife to my neck

sent 2 hours ago

jungkook: i know you are awake

where are my pictures

send 30 mins ago

jungkook: ok

sent 2 hours ago

jungkook: I LIED IM NOT OK IM NOT

sent 10 mins ago

jungkook: plsplsolslplslpls

y/n: hi

jungkook: dress?

y/n: ??

jungkook: show me the dress

now

y/n: …

jungkook: pls

i’m like a dog waiting to be fed

y/n: never compare yourself to a dog again are you sick in the head

jungkook: me and bam are identical twins rn

y/n: i’m gonna throw up

jungkook: show me the dress 😖

y/n: no

jungkook: ok fine im just gonna go do a line of coke then

y/n: ur being extra

like extremely extra

jungkook: coke is on the table

my lines are ready

im about to sniff

y/n: just come over and see ur for yourself?

jungkook: OH???

OK I WILL

I WILL DO THAT

fuck the lines

i’m omw

HEHEHEHE 🤭🤭

NAMJOON -

namjoon: when you get home text me ok?

sorry i could say bye properly they wanted me to record something

staff are being slow today

i’m kinda getting annoyed

yk i would of walked out with you otherwise

or you can call me

actually just call me

sent 3 hours ago

namjoon: i said call me i mean it

sent 2 hours ago

namjoon: so are you fucking home now??

sent 1 hour ago

namjoon: hello??????

y/n: kim namjoon???????????

namjoon: sorry

i didn’t mean to be mean

y/n: i think you did

namjoon: you didn’t call

y/n: sorry

namjoon: i worry yk??

y/n: i said i was sorry

namjoon: idc

for 6 hours i was on the edge of my seat

what if you died or something?

did you just ignore me for fun or did something actually happen

y/n: i’m home

namjoon: it’s too late to tell me that now

y/n: i didn’t watch our show btw

i’m waiting for you

namjoon: …

y/n: ^^

namjoon: answer my question

y/n: stop being mean

namjoon: you were mean first

y/n: wasn’t

namjoon: you didn’t call babe

y/n: SORRY OMG WONT HAPPEN AGAIN

namjoon: TAKE UR SORRY AND SHOVE IT UP UR ASS TBH

y/n: i’ll watch the new episode rn

namjoon: …

y/n: that’s what i thought bitch

namjoon: i’m not coming home

y/n: oh no!!

my hand it’s just itching to press play rn

namjoon: whatever be there in 10

y/n: once again i prove i wear the pants in this relationship

sent 10 mins ago

SEOKJIN -

y/n: bff can you pick me up

jin: i am NOT ur bff

i am ur BF thank you very much

but ig i could

where are you?

and what the hell are you dumb out so late it’s like 2 am

sent 4 mins ago

jin: how the hell can i pick you up if idk where ur at

ur lucky i’m still awake and willing to come get you

sent 5 mins ago

4 miss calls from jin

jin: what if i kill you

CAN YOU TELL ME WHERE UR AT

sent 2 mins ago

jin: went to look for my car keys and you still haven’t replied

do you want me to break up with you rn?

sent 4 mins ago

12 missed calls from jin

jin: the amount of times i have called your phone is embarrassing

like i’m some obsessed sick freak

WHERE ARE YOU

i really don’t want to have to drive around seoul looking for you

am i a stalker????

sent 10 mins ago

5 missed calls from jin

jin: I HOPE WHOEVER TOOK YOU MAKES YOU SUFFER

okay i take that back

i’m a LITTLE freaked out rn

just a little

don’t let it get to ur head

sent 20 mins ago

jin: DROVE TO HYBE AND THEY SAID YOU LEFT LIKE BEFORE 10???

also why the hell are they still open fr that’s not right

WHERE ARE YOU IM DRIVING AROUND THE STREETS LIKE A LOSER

7 missed called from jin

y/n: LMAO fell asleep in seungcheol’s car

and my phone died

jin: seungcheol???

y/n: seventeen man

scoups?

jin: where are you rn???

y/n: at seungcheol’s

vernon said hi

jin: TELL VERNON TO DIE

y/n: um rude?

i said you said hi back

anyways will come home later might as well stay here for the night

jin: send me the address

y/n: miss me that much??

jin: send it

y/n: are you mad at me???

you started sharing your location with jin

jin: put my reputation on the line for you today

i will never forget this

y/n: why am i scared rn…

TAEHYUNG -

tae:

why is this us

*whimpers in your ear*

sent 14 hours ago

tae: okay that wasn’t that bad

sent 1 hour go

tae: i’ve definitely said worse

sent 2 hours ago

tae: yare yare

sent 1 hour ago

tae: do you think army would call me tae-chan if i asked

or should i be v-chan

but thinking about it tae-chan just connects with me on a different level

it’s so personal

intimate almost

sent 2 hours ago

tae: baka why are you ignoring me

yare yare

sent 3 hours ago

tae: HELLO HELLO

pls 🥺pls 🥺pls 🥺pls🥺

sent 2 hours ago

tae: ヾ( ￣O￣)ツ

me asf

sent 1 hour ago

tae: oh

heyyyyyy lolz

i now see how smoking negatively effects the brain

i would like to formally apologise for the man i was in the last hours

y/n: kys

tae: i was high and watching naruto

forgive me 🥺

y/n: you are out of ur mind

tae: *was

i was out of my mind

never smoking again i swear

y/n: we need to go on a break or something

i need time to fully process the bullshit you just came to me with

tae: live in the moment

don’t dwell on the past

sent 10 mins ago

tae: HEY COME BACK

ily

ghosting me will NOT solve our issues

…

can you tell i was listening to svt when writing this low-key can’t see straight rn how the hell it 1:42 am rn not on tbh

[owlight]

Hello hello! I’ve been really enjoying reading your writing and saw that your requests were open! (:

May I request Zoro, Usopp + a character of your choice (even if it’s nobody) with a gn! s/o who has no sense of danger? They just enjoy the excitement of adventure and rush into things with no thought ~

Thank you in advance if you decide to take my request !

Thank you for requesting 💖😚 I love this request fr,been in my draft for few months I'm sorry for that

Tags: not proof read, fluff, reckless behaviors,making up plots as I write

Zoro & Usopp & Trafalgar law with a gn!s/o with no sense of danger

Zoro

You're like Luffy but worse because unlike Luffy you're smart and still choose to walk right through the danger of life without a blink of an eye

But lucky for you ! Zoro is built different (kinda himbo ngl) and he will walk through danger with you with no thought too because someone gotta keep you safe while you walk into the most obvious death trap ever

He will always keep an eye on you ,just to make sure you don't get yourself into trouble,but just like Luffy you wander off on your own ,he goes after you (he get lost in his way to find you) and then he find you fighting some marine captain at a bar for some animal crackers

He so chill with you because years of begin with Luffy had made him immune to no sense of danger (he is also like you too so he doesn't mind it much)

He really like your fearless side ,you could get into the wildest most dangerous situation and you would still have your smile ,he admire that about you a lot

"(y/n) nami told us to stay low" Zoro grumble as he carry you under his arm and run from the marine troops running after you two "yeah but he was a dick to the waitress AND tried hitting on me" you defend yourself, Zoro shakes his head "...you got yourself a point but I'm not taking the blame when we reach the ship,you will !" Zoro says as he run down some alleyway to hide from the Marines,he can't help but smile at the fact you still trying to get free to fight the Marines...ah yeah he is a bit more in love with you because he want to do that too but for once he gotta put your safety before his hunger for a good fight...

He will try his best to let you be doing your adventures safely,he is strong and can protect you well but eh if only he wasn't so bad at actually stopping you from doing reckless things

He will agree to anything reckless you want to do because he Is just...he think it's a good idea? Why not fight a whole troop on your own with him? Both of you are capable???? He doesn't see why everyone think that's dangerous

He is your ride or die for real,he would go down with you with anything without a thought usually,he might argue for like one minute then he would give in Because he think you got a valid point

he might be Stern with you sometimes to make sure you don't harm yourself though , putting yourself in harm is his last thing on his list (still on the list tho)

He enjoys your spirit, quality time with you always lead to him learning new things about himself like he could fight five crocodiles to grab you from an untimely death

He is a 10/10 boyfriend, would help you invade a country if you asked enough

Law

Law sometimes wonder how you both Ended up together, you are the complete opposite from him ,you rush into things ,you are reckless,you don't care for danger

But again you're the reason why he is able to do so many new things ,explore new island and get into some questionable situations

"(y/n)-ya....where were you..and why are you holding a Capybara?" Law asks as he stand on the deck of the Polar Tang,you are standing on the sand as you look at the decked submarine ship "oh yeah,see I went to explore the island with bepo and then I have seen some guy,see the guy called himself the capybara king and he was terrorizing the people of the island,turning them into capybara and I had to fight him and yeah I kinda lost the fight..... and I need your help" you tell him and law rub his temple,so tiredly "we shouldn't care it's not our business,we should leave,get Bepo and let's leave the island" law says sternly and you smiles sheepishly "ahhhh..this is Bepo though,he turned him into a Capybara cuz he took the fall instead of me..."

Law left eye twitch slightly as he grab his sword ".....alright show me where is that bastard ,I will deal with him and then we are leaving and you are grounded for the next month"

You are the reason why he partly have anxiety from new places ,please stop getting into dangerous situation the moment your foot hit an island

He is this close ".." on just starting to put you on those kid leashes before going anywhere,just so you don't wander off somewhere and end up liberating some island by accident

He appreciates your fearlessness yet it make him worry so much about you,please Just stop trying to have some new adventure he know you're a Pirate but You are not immune to injuries

He patch you up after every adventure you end injured from ,he is always glued to you after that ,making sure you don't leave his sight

The crew have a chart for watching (baby sitting) you duty ,they all trying to help law not get grey hair before his thirties by watching over you before you end up somewhere you are not supposed to be

Law still loves you though,your energy is a fresh breath of air in his life even if you always acting so recklessly ,he still adores you

Will try to explore with you sometimes in hope to keep you entertained and safe (you end up finding the one piece I swear)

6.4/10 boyfriend , would stop you from doing a lot of dangerous things ,but sometimes he will watches you do dumb reckless things just to see you come to ask him for help ,it's his favorite routine in a way

Usopp

Every night ,he pray to god that you stop trying to do these dangerous adventures because you always end up dragging him with you ,bless your heart your idea of fun is like active suicide activities in his eyes

He loves you truly but he can so much play brave in face of death,you are like Luffy (but without the plot armor) and he worry sick for you whenever he sees you wander off to your new adventure whenever you reach a new island ,and so much against his own self preservation..he follows you

"my love... I'm pretty I saw Marines camping nearby" Usopp mumble as he hold your hand, walking with you,you have no care in the world as you walk " oh yeah I know,I already burnt Thier camp, they won't bother us for a while while we gather what we need " Usopp felt his eyes jump from his skull '' YOU DID WHAT?"

" oh damn is that judgement??? Uso! I was keeping us safe,beside I made sure no one was inside ya know,it will be more calm for us to walk!" You explains to him and he sighs deeply,your intentions are pure yet your action was what he could describe,a crackhead level plan "we will have to deal with angry marines when they discover what you did ,they will probably call for backup"

You shake your head with a little mischievous grin " they won't be able to,I took all Thier den den mushi mushi " you tell him as you show him your bag,and it was true it was filled with transport snails different shapes and looks very relaxed as they eat a.. cabbage? Do you keep cabbages in your backbag?

"....alright I guess you...really thought this out" Usopp mumble nervously,failing to see that one of the snails look like it belonged to a certain golden suit admiral...he trust you enough to not be that foolish..but you are unfortunately and he is in love with you..

Always have a mini heart attack because of you,have mercy on his soul he will have a heart condition because of reckless you can be combined with Luffy own recklessness,how did he end up having to be with two reckless people in the same crew???

He tries his best to district you off any dangerous situation,so you don't jump at it ,just like with Luffy ,he would gaslight you into NOT going to the dangerous Island because no we didn't just go pass it please don't tell Luffy about it

You are Chaotic good,which he appreciates you are not doing all that out of idiocy (like Luffy) but sheer curiosity and wanting to explore ,it's cute

He singlehandedly saved you 68836 times by begin the voice of reason for you and you listen to him because you love him

He would save you if you need saving ,he would man up for you just to save you and you would appreciate him and love him-at least that what he thinks he want to do, usually you end up saving him ngl

You and him are the polar opposite yet mash together so well,you still listen to him when things get serious and he still let you go apeshit when he notices you needing to let your energy out

He still adores you anyway, because after you get tired from getting into so much adventures ,you cuddle to him like a little cat and he goes through 7737 stage of happiness while biting his hand to not wake you up

You're so precious to him in general even if he is pretty sure he is getting white hair because of you

10/10 boyfriend ngl , would try to stop you but fails miserably and end up joining you,is good at lying his ass and getting you both out of trouble so good for you ngl

[starheirxero]

[rez]

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Anyway

Hope Castor can help Lunar.

Or atleast point him in the right direction.

I think Lunar is finally facing himself really.

And I understand wanting him out of the house but like- why are they surprised he ran away?

Thats like what Lunar does? He ran for months after he died, him running away is par for the course. And he was gone for three days because he was in jail? They didn't even accept that, they just got mad at him for running. As if Monty hadn't actually decided he was gonna kill Lulu.

Like Lunar would probably be dead if he'd stayed, or atleast injured.

'We do still love you and youre still our little brother'

-They say as they irepibly damage any and all trust Lunar had in them at the moment and in the future.

Moon I understand you want him to actually face consequences but there's no going back from this!

Lunar will never trust you, or anyone else in this family, again.

Castor pleasepleaseplease be the one who finds him.

Ohhh how I want to see more Pollux and Castor interactions bc as I said in another ask that idk if you received Cas almost seems to be avoiding talking to her specifically about Lulu.

That or Lunar gets kidnapped again.

More specifically by the creator so gem (or even just Cas) have to save him

But with Gemini separate there's also the possibility rez or someone else targets one of the twins while the other is away so thatd be neat.

ALL OF THIS NODNODNOD!!!!!!

I think Castor choosing to help Lunar while Pollux doesn't would be really interesting from a Gemini perspective. They're the twins, they make up one astral, one constellation together. If they truly become divided over this, I would be deeply fascinated to see where it goes from there since we got so used to seeing them as Gemini—a collective entity—rather than themselves.

And YEAH LIKE. Listen. I know that to the family, because they don't actually have the full picture, it looks like Lunar is just a loose canon that attacked Earth in a fit and then dipped. But also LUNAR TRIED TO EXPLAIN THAT THEY WERE IN LITERALLY INCAPABLE OF RETURNING SOONER BC THEY WERE JAILED AND THEN REZ PUT THEM ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE GLOBE. AND MOON JUST WENT "I DON'T CARE." LIKE CMON 😭 "why were you gone for 3 days" "i was jailed and then left in russia" "whatever i dont care" MOON WHEN I GET YOU.......

THE "I LOVE YOUS" BETWEEN IT ALL YEAH.

I'm sorry but no amount of "you are family and we love you" is going to lessen the blow of "you have basically been squatting in my house (that i invited you into and you've been paying rent for) and you're a danger to this entire family so I want you to never speak or get near any of us until you sort yourself out." ESPECIALLY WHEN MOON SAID "YOU'RE LUCKY I EVEN STILL CONSIDER YOU FAMILY" LIKE I'M SORRY BUT THAT'S WILD. Again, I understand Moon in this situation. That does not mean I don't think he wasn't insanely rude LMAO 😭

Exactly like you said, Moon cannot undo this. Lunar has always looked up to old Moon and so I cannot imagine how much more it hurts coming from him. I honestly can't imagine a clear future where Lunar is going to feel safe amongst their own family again, knowing that they all viewed them as dangerous enough to be kicked out. Honestly, I'm half expecting this to end up as "Lunar lives independently and then realizes they actually feel better not living around their family and that they were kinda awful for them on accident" HDKSHDJS

YEA MORE CASTOR N POLLUX INTERACTIONS WOULD BE GREAT...... Yesyes I have received ur other ask and I'm actually gunna answer it after this one but GHOD yeah. Seeing them disagree abt smth is so interesting and I need more of it....... If one twin is hurt tho,,,,,,, ouhg. The Angst........

[clemnchai]

Dealer! Ellie headcannon’s ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

dealer! ellie who’s your polar opposite. everyone was surprised when you two first came out. you’re sweet as honey and shy— outfits always a littlee skimpy. and ellie was… ellie. she loves it tho. loves having arm candy ♡

dealer! ellie who gets genuinely offended when you try to roll your own joints or even smoke without her. she’s such a baby about it. “what the fuck? where’d you get this shit from?” she picks up the tiny baggy with aggravation on her face. “well… you were busy els— and i’ve been stressed! y’cant be mad at me because you neglected me” you say with a small pout. “neglect—? ok ok. you’re not smoking this shit, man. how about this, i roll you a joint with my good shit and we can watch hello kitty island adventure—whatever the fuck and chill, kay?” safe to say ellie takes the ‘pretty girl’ discount seriously ♡

dealer! ellie who always rolls your joints in strawberry papers and bags your weed in cute baggies w hearts ♡

dealer! ellie who called you princess in a teasing way at first but it just…. stuck. ♡

dealer! ellie only lets you do her make up while she’s high as a kite. so now you’re here sitting on her lap putting mascara and eyeliner on her pretty red eyes. “els, stop moving. i’ll mess up” you stop and sit back to look at her while she smokes the last of her joint. “you’re lucky m’ letting you do this— how long does this take again? is this why you take so long to get ready?” you rolled your eyes as she rambled and she playfully pinches ur waist and smoothes her hand over. “done! “ you hand her a small mirror to look at your work. “cute. my lil’ picasso.” leaning in to give you a wet smooch that you dodge. “no kisses, you’ll ruin my work.” she huffs and sits up to effortlessly flip you over so she’s on top of you. you let out a girly squeal at the sudden change in position. “fuck that.” she says n’ then gives you wet, exaggerated kisses all over your pretty, giggly face ♡

dealer! ellie who does things because she knows it makes you nervous. she’ll take your cheeks in between her fingers and shotgun kiss you during the smoke sesh and chuckle at how you look at her w doe eyes:( or she’ll tease you in public— moving her hand a little too close to the warmth in between your thighs and pulling away when she hears your breath stutter. she can be so mean:( ♡

dealer! ellie who listens to 90s rap and r&b. also cannot fuck you without some r&b in the background. “sets the mood” she says. ♡

dealer! ellie who passes you the joint when fucking you:( “yea— yea. shit. you look so fucking good.” she pulls the joints from her mouth and blows the smoke away from your face. the way you cream around her strap makes her head fuzzier than weed could ever. “here— open up bun” she places the joint in between you lips and stares as you inhale— and eventually pull back to turn your head up to exhale. “mmh.” she gives a validating hum and smacks your ass— completely discarding the joint to kiss your red, pouty lips ♡

dealer! ellie who makes stupid jokes and conspiracies while high. “dude…. what do you think would happen if everyone farted at the exact same time. what if the world like— fuckin’— exploded or something.” “ellie.. what?” you cant contain your giggles at the auburn haired girls question. “what?? it’s a genuine question. what if all of our farts created a nuclear bomb. that’s kinda… scary. now i’m getting scared.” she said seriously— as if the made up situation could ever happen. “ellie.. that will never happen and i’m pretty sure your farts alone could create a nuclear bomb.” you joked back and giggled at her offended face. “okay…. you got me.” she’s so silly😭

dealer! ellie who only downloads social media so you can send her memes and things that remind you of her. her only instagram pics are scenery pics and pictures of you ♡

dealer! ellie who loves ass. that’s it. especially loves when you wear short skirts so when you bend down she can see your cute pink panties. sometimes she’ll pull your panties to the side and eat your pussy from the back till your knees are weak:( ♡

dealer! ellie who just loves her girl soo much!! you’ll often catch her staring at you and you get so shy— but all she’s thinking about is how lucky she is to have such a sweet girl like you belong to her and her only ♡

- ˚ʚ♡a ɞ˚

[superm4ks]

I need Max to serve some cunt bc it's been wayyy too long. The last time he really served cunt was when he called George a dickhead but I need moree

😑😑😑😑 👍🏽 ok respectfully we love a good Baku cat fight but like

- excuse me

- literally the next race

- Checo was telling media both Max’s titles happened because of him somebody out there was floating Prost senna conversations people lost their whole minds like 😭😭

-first of all quali didn't even start great like he hadn't set a lap when it got red flagged kind of Amateur hour at rbr. last time u will c number 1 car go out late btw he’s fully traumatized these days he’s breaking front wings hauling ass out of that garage god bless him. Anyway p9 wid his hyped up teammate starting on pole the casuals were celebrating even tho max was doing like. borderline unthinkable laps in fp2 so u could smell a generational moment from the get go

-dude overtook like literally everybody on hards by like lap 15 i think and still had all four wheels somehow spinning faster than checos fresh mediums by lap 40

- Destroying ur teammates entire wdc campaign in a single race weekend on hard tires from p9 kinda cunty idk?. To me

- Ok fine then Monaco: Jeddah won the battle but he won the war. made up 2 tenths in one of the shortest sectors of the whole calendar in prolly one of the best and most competitive quali sessions in Monaco, ever. Senna type performance, just fully letting the talent take over rascasse and antony noghes. U cannot serve more cunt than that

- Non? Bon. Spain: black and white flag for track limits. His engineer tells him he’s stupid and Max is like 'whatvr what’s the fastest lap' and his engineer is like 'SORRY did u not hear what I just' and max steals fastest lap from Checo. Who btw had just set that on new softs for his flop lil point and Max leading by 24 seconds at risk of getting a pen wid gp warning him against it is like 😚😚😚😚😚bet . This isn’t cunt to u. Ok

- FINE. Canada: do I have to talk about senna again😐. Do I have to say he equaled sennas wins at 25 years old. But despite the Senna numbers it was also an eerily Schumacheresq quali session from Max. Taking pole by a second under the rain is something u c twice, maybe once in a lifetime, if ur lucky. We are lucky 🫵🏽

- Austria: u look at me rn and tell me Austria wasn’t the most 2021 max you’ve seen that mf since that actual season. U tell me he didn’t serve cunt nearly sending both Red Bulls to eat shit at the RED BULL ring because he was a lil annoyed checo dared to like. Squeeze him a lil bit. Nearly overtaken by an Haas i cannot stress this enough. Bro Lewis impeded him once by accident during practice and Max literally twerked in front of his car and got away wid it. And on top of that he gaslit rbr into letting him pit for softs and risk the whole race to take one single extra point like he wud rather fucking die than let anybody else have it. He’s beating merc in the THE FONSTRCUTORS CHAMPIONSHIP‼️‼️‼️‼️ HES 1 PERSON

- .

- Austria was such fucking prime Verstappen cunt delivry it was so dumb and all of it completely unnecessary and ur fucking telling me he hasn’t really ‘served’ because he doesn’t have some tall beans and toast bitch up in his face like

- Which obvi brings me to Silverstone: HE WON THE BRITISH GP HE literally won the British Grand Prix???? Half a million people praying on his downfall, mclaren having its own lil moment he doesn’t give a fuck 5 poles and 6 wins in a row on ur head fucking losers eat it. Eat ittt. 2023 has been nonstop cunt serving from this guy it’s literally one of thee greatest verstappen performances to date put some respect on it immediately . Thank u