#we hate earn in this household

[weilongfu]

"You smell different today," Thame said as he curled around Po's back in the early morning sunlight. "Why haven't you smelled like this before?"

Po scrunched up his nose. "I didn't do anything, maybe something is funny with your nose today."

"Na.... P'Po..." Thame nuzzled under Po's ear and Po shivered in a way that was becoming too common. The soft touch of Thame with his alpha smell of warm cotton and leather was becoming near pavlovian. "Maybe we should stay in today..." Thame's hand rested on Po's waist as his thumb rubbed his hip bone.

Po felt a spike of heat in his gut and turned to face Thame, but hid his frown. "And have Dylan be mad at me because you missed recording the guide track for MARS' new song?"

"Well..."

"Go take a shower and wash the funny smell out of your nose," Po said before kissing Thame carefully.

"Shower with me?" Thame asked between slower pecks on lips, cheeks, and forehead.

"Thame-"

With one final kiss, Thame gracefully rolled out of bed into a stretch before heading to Po's bathroom. Once he was out of sight, Po pulled open his bedside table drawer. Two pill bottles greeted him and Po shook both before frowning at last. The birth control pills rattled in their bottle but the heat suppressants remained quiet

"When did I..." Another, smaller, wave of heat rolled through Po's body before he swallowed down the one pill he did have while picking up his phone and ordering a refill on his pharmacy app. As Thame started vocal exercises in the shower, Po took a calming breath. "It'll be fine. He'll be out all day and I can come home early, pick up my suppressants and he'll never know."

After a quick shared shower where Po did his best to keep Thame's hands and his own where both could see them, the day started as normal. Thame took his taxi to the newly created SYNC offices and Po took his to Uncle Joei's tailor shop. This was apparently all the normalcy the universe could afford as Uncle Joei's shop was suddenly busy with a party of ten, a groom and his groomsmen, all wanting tuxedos for a Western style wedding. This was swiftly followed by a call from Nano to the shop, asking for fabric swatches for the next set of suits for MARS since the first set went over so well on social media. Po suspected the credit on the photos was what had lead to an uptick in Uncle Joei's business.

"Ah... I picked them out already nong," Uncle Joei said happily into the phone. "I'll have N'Po bring them over, yes?"

"Oh that would be perfect," Nano replied with the same enthusiasm. "Do you mind if we send him back after lunch?"

"Of course not, of course not. We probably won't see a big surge of customers again, it's usually pick-ups and fittings in the afternoon." Uncle Joei turned to Po. "Your friends want to treat you to lunch after you drop off the swatches. Just let me know when you're on your way back."

Po blotted the sweat beginning to bead on his brow with a handkerchief which made Uncle Joei's smile change just a bit. "I'll head out now then."

"Go, go, I'll tell them." As Po picked up the swatches and left, Uncle Joei turned to the phone again, "N'Nano? I think N'Po might not make it to lunch..."

As it turned out, Po barely made it to SYNC. Despite the copious amounts of neutralizing spray he'd picked up and applied on the way to the shop, Po felt eyes on his body following him. The hood over his head and light scarf around his neck did nothing to restrain what was becoming a large amount of pheromones. Po checked his phone, the pharmacy had still not refilled his prescription.

"P'Po! Have you been waiting long?" Nano said as he came down to the building lobby to escort Po up. "Aren't you hot covered up like that?"

"I'm..." Po fought the urge to resist as Nano helped uncover him. The first burst of air conditioning over his heated skin made him shiver. "Well, yes, thank you."

Nano's nose twitched and Po pretended to ignore it. As a fellow omega, Nano wouldn't do anything ridiculous over Po smelling like his heat was coming in. At least not in public. "Come on up, P'Thame has been unbearable he keeps whining about how he had to record the guide track instead of staying home with you." Po sighed and Nano giggled as he pulled Po to the elevator. "Anyway, we're almost done for the morning so we can all go have a nice lunch and catch up."

Po smiled. "You saw me three days ago at the group house."

"But that was three days ago! A lot has changed, like P'Jun and P'Dylan haven't been in each other's faces lately and I think-"

Po let Nano's chatter wash over him as he tried to control his breathing, unable to see the way Nano's eyes kept darting over him. When the elevator opened once more, Thame was waiting for them. Po tried to meet his eyes and saw them widen.

"P'Po, are you-"

"P'Thame, you better take him home," Nano cut in.

"Nano!" Po gave the smaller boy a nudge. "You-"

"I'll call Uncle and tell him you won't be back, he suspected you weren't feeling well," Nano said as he hopped out of the elevator for Thame to take his place and immediately put his arm around Po's waist to help support him. "Bye bye P'Po! I'll grab the swatches from you next time! P'Thame, you better take good care of him!"

"I always do," Thame said while looking into Po's eyes and pressing buttons. Po turned to face him, but the only thing that flashed before his eyes was Earn's disgusted face.

"It smells so bad, like pool chlorine!"

"Thame, I-"

"I called a car service in advance. It's parked in the parking lot and I'll return the car later," Thame said as he guided Po by the waist, always gentle, never forceful. "Just you and me."

Po allowed himself to be nudged, herded, seat buckled, and driven home. Thame continued to give Po what were presumed to be his usual loving glances, supported by the holding of hands at stoplights and traffic halts, but Po could barely feel them, lost in the memory of his last heat off suppressants.

"Earn," Po said quietly. "If it bothers you that much-"

"Of course it does! Your heat smell is awful, it smells so bad, like pool chlorine!" Earn huffed. "But what else am I supposed to do, I'm your boyfriend."

"I didn't say you have to stay and help."

"Or what? You'll go ask someone else?"

"I can just handle it myself, I've done it before while you've been away at conferences or giving presentations."

"And you'll stink up the house!"

"Then maybe you should leave the house for now," Po said quietly. "And I'll make sure it's aired out before you come back."

Earn did not come back.

"P'Po?" Thame said as he gently shook Po. "We're here. Do you need me to-"

"I can get inside," Po said firmly. "You can go back to-" Po stopped as Thame was already by his side, helping him out of the car. Po felt his knees wobble, unsure if it was the oncoming of his heat or the way his body normally reacted when Thame did something stupidly romantic.

"I'm not going anywhere unless you tell me to leave."

"I'm not going to tell you," Po said as they walked into the condo lobby. "Most alphas choose to leave."

"Most alphas or just your ex?" Thame mused as they waited for the elevator. "After meeting Earn, I have to say I think it's the latter."

"I thought you didn't do alpha pissing contests," Po said as they finally stepped into his condo.

"Oh, no pissing was involved." Thame said as he locked the door before walking with Po to the bedroom. "He did stop me in the bathroom, but I was already done." Thame watched at a distance as Po removed some of the outer layers of his clothing, the heat smell intensifying. "I took the measure of him another way and it was... educational."

Po scoffed and leaned back against the headboard of the bed. "Thame-"

"Can I stay?" Thame asked quietly as he took a step closer. "Can I spend this heat with you?"

Po pulled up the blanket around himself despite how it felt unbearably hot. "...doesn't it smell bad?"

"What smells bad? Your heat scent?" Thame tilted his head and Po nodded. "Who said it smells bad? Earn?"

"He used to complain all the time when we shared heats until we stopped." Po looked to the side. "He said I smelled like concentrated pool chlorine and that... it got worse when he-"

"He's dumb and his nose is bad," Thame said as he took another small step which earned him side eye. "You smell so nice, like the beach on a nice day. You smell like salt and sun and happiness." Thame sat on the edge of the bed and Po allowed it. "I like everything about P'Po so much, I can't imagine a situation where I'd think you smell bad." Thame nudged himself closer and opened his arms. Po allowed himself the comfort of them. "I can't imagine what it's like to have so many heats with a partner like that," Thame said as he rubbed Po's back and kissed his neck. Po grumbled in warning and Thame only resumed rubbing Po's back. "But I'm not Earn. Even if it's not this heat, the next, or the hundred after, I want to spend them with you when you're ready some day."

Po nuzzled some more into Thame's neck, the muskier leather part of Thame's smell becoming stronger in response to Po's state. There was no risk of Thame doing anything Po did not want, and Po knew this was immutable fact. But the time to make a choice was rapidly coming as heat and slick began to pool between Po's legs.

"Kiss me," Po said softly into Thame's neck.

Thame pulled away to look Po in the eyes and cup his cheeks before kissing him softly, reverently. His hands remained there but did not push or pull. Po's hands, forever greedy, moved to Thame's waist and sought the hem of his shirt, but Thame still did not move. There, Po could feel the beating of Thame's heart and the rapid pace of his breaths as Po's scent intensified. Thame did not pull away.

"Touch me," Po said into Thame's lips.

Thame's hands moved slowly down Po's neck, his shoulders, his arms, and finally rested on his thighs, squeezing gently, the same yet different from all the times they'd spent together before.

"P'Po, please." Thame moved to kiss Po's neck again and this time was met with no growl, but a moan instead. "Tell me what you want me to-"

Po pulled Thame down on top of him. "Stay with me."

Thame kissed Po again before pulling off his shirt and reaching into Po's pants and between his legs. Past sticky hardness into slick opening, Thame's fingers gently rubbed and prodded. Po felt his body arch without his permission.

"I'm so happy," Thame murmured as he pulled the blanket away with his clean hand while the other continued to work Po's body. Po arched his hips again and Thame took the opportunity to pull off Po's pants. "Thank you, thank you, thank you." Thame kissed each word down Po's still clothed chest, causing the other man to protest despite how both of Thame's hands were now busy coaxing and teasing both erection and hole.

The first orgasm surprised them both with the suddenness of it all. Po whimpered and moaned amid a fresh wave of cum and slick while Thame continued to work him through it.

"Towels," Thame mumbled to himself as he finally pulled off Po's t-shirt and his jeans after a kiss. "Towels later, yes." Thame rubbed the head of his dick against Po's opening. "Are you ready?"

Po pulled Thame down for another kiss, deeper, hungry in a way where he'd only just realized he'd been starving. "Please."

Thame obliged by thrusting in slowly and Po sighed in pleasure, glad Thame remembered his preferences even when not thinking about them. Although heat increased his desire and urgency, Po was still a more sensitive partner and moving too fast was something that caused more pain than pleasure early in sex. Something Earn had never bothered to think about.

"Is it good, P'Po?" Thame asked as he gently scraped his teeth against Po's neck. It was a secondary question, although Po wasn't sure if Thame knew he was asking it. "Do you want more?"

"It's good," Po said as he pulled Thame's face back into view to kiss him again. "It's really good. You can- ah!" Thame gave another hard thrust as a test and Po nearly squirmed from the overstimulation which meant it was almost enough. "Thame, I-"

"Do you want me to knot you, P'Po?" Thame asked as he maintained his slow pace, but harder thrusts. Po suddenly found it hard to breathe. "I know we've done it before but-"

"Yes," Po said in a breathy gasp. Thame pressed in as deep as he could go and Po could already feel the base of his dick swelling, catching on the edge of his hole. "But I'm..."

"Did he never knot you, phi?" Thame's brow furrowed and Po couldn't tell if it was annoyance at Earn or concentration from trying to melt his brain from pleasure while maintaining his perfect timing. "Don't think about him right now, think about me." Thame nuzzled Po's neck again as his knot finished swelling and he thrust in one last time.

Po groaned, feeling Thame's orgasm inside himself and feeling his own release all over his chest, coming untouched. The fullness was something health class had never properly described and something Earn had only granted him once. After deciding he hated Po's heat scent, Earn avoided knotting Po to avoid being stuck so close to the smell for longer than he needed to be.

"Can I bite you, phi?" Thame asked as he kissed everywhere he could reach. "Can I make you mine for good? My wonderful phi."

Po, unable to resist, melted under the attention, but did not present his neck and Thame didn't push. He settled for rubbing his cheeks against Po's neck, scenting instead of biting. Po sighed and allowed himself to enjoy the attention until they were untied.

"How long do your heats normally last?" Thame said after they separated and had a moment to clean up before the next wave came upon them.

"Not more than a day or two," Po said with a shrug. "At least that was before I took suppressants around Earn."

Thame paused for a moment. "Will... Will you go back to taking suppressants?"

Po looked to his bedside drawer. "Do you want to keep sharing heats with me?"

"Yes." Thame took Po's hands in his and kissed his knuckles. "Please let me."

Po's phone beeped and a glance told him it was the pharmacy.

Po pulled Thame down on top of him again.

"Then let's keep going."

"Yes, phi. Let's."

[overexciteddragon]

Suffering from the "the world is a hell place trying to take away my rights and will to live and I don't think I'll see a world where I don't work my way into an early death" kinda depression I call that "rational depression"

[ferrstappen]

dad of three l dad! max verstappen imagine

a/n: sooo max is officially a dad 😭😭 so I picked up the draft of my dad!Max series with the twins which you can find here! I hope you like it and let me m ow if you have some ideas!

summary: baby verstappen nº3 is here, and the twins are now happy with the idea.

It had been a quiet morning, at least by the new Verstappen household standards.

The Monaco penthouse, usually alive with the squabbling of six-year-old twins and the occasional feline disaster, was unusually peaceful. The cause of this rare tranquility? The arrival of Baby Lia had everyone mesmerized, literally and metaforically having everyone wrapped around her little finger.

Youcradled the newborn in your arms, gently rocking her in the nursery Max had insisted on painting himself. Pale pink walls, soft grey furniture, and a mobile of tiny stars that the twins helped assemble.

“You’re not even crying today,” you murmured, brushing a soft kiss on Lia’s forehead. “It’s like you know I needed a break, what a smart baby, yes you are.”

Footsteps padded down the hallway, fast and energetic. Then came the crash of something toppling over. The twins ready to disrupt the quiet.

“Mila!” Luca’s voice rang out, shrill and dramatic. “You almost dropped her bunny!”

“It’s not my fault Jimmy knocked it down!” Mila huffed back.

You sighed, smiling despite the quiet moment gone. The calm had lasted exactly twelve minutes.

You stepped into the hallway with Lia, just in time to see Jimmy dart out from under the baby’s toy box with a fluff of pink clutched between his teeth.

“Mama!” Mila wailed, dramatic tears already forming. “Jimmy stole Lia’s bunny!”

“Yes, because you dropped it, Mila!” Luca reprimanded his twin.

Before you could intervene, Max’s voice boomed from the kitchen. “Jimmy! No stealing from the baby!”

Max appeared, wearing sweatpants, a Red Bull hoodie, and holding two sippy cups. He looked equally amused and tired. parenthood in a nutshell.

“Crisis averted?” he asked, eyebrows raised.

“I think Jimmy wants attention,” you replied, bouncing Lia gently. “He’s jealous, he probably thought it was only going to be the twins forever.”

Max chuckled, scooping up the cat and plopping him into Luca’s arms. “That’s what happens when you’ve ruled the house for years. Then babies come and steal your spotlight. Tough life.”

“And what about Sassy?” You asked Max.

Max glanced toward the back of the couch where Sassy lounged with the disinterest of a feline queen, which of course she was. “She’s plotting our demise, probably.”

You snorted, the vibrations of your body earning a smile from Lia.

The twins came running, now united in their mission: cooing at their baby sister.

“Can I hold her again?” Mila asked, reaching for Lia’s tiny hand.

“No, me first!” Luca insisted, already positioning the couch pillows for support just like Max had shown them.

You sighed again, this time with a full heart. You remembered the day you told the twins about the pregnancy, Luca had declared he didn’t want “a baby stealing his toys,” and Mila had spent the afternoon sulking because “babies are boring.” And both of them had tried really hard to stop the baby’s arrival.

Now? They were obsessed.

It was later that weekend in Miami when Max found himself being cornered in the paddock for an interview with Sky Sports Netherlands.

“So Max,” the interview began in Dutch, “congratulations again on the new addition to the family! How are things going at home with three kids now?”

Max grinned, hands in his pockets. “Chaotic. Loud. Exhausting… Perfect.”

The interviewer laughed. “And the twins? How are Mila and Luca adjusting? I remember they weren’t too pumped when we crossed paths a few months ago.”

Max didn’t hesitate. “Honestly? I thought they’d hate it. When we told them (Y/N) was pregnant, Luca wanted to move out.” He chuckled, shaking his head. “Mila made us sign a paper saying we’d still play Barbie games with her even after the baby came. They were so in denial that we got a call from their teacher.”

The small group of journalists laughed.

“But now?” Max continued. “They’re obsessed. They follow Lia around like bodyguards. Luca brings her toys she can’t even use, Mila sings to her. They fight about who gets to hold her. I think I’ve held her less than both of them.”

“And the cats?” The interviewer teased. “I hear Jimmy and Sassy have opinions.

“Oh, Jimmy’s a menace. He tries to sleep in the crib,” Max said, his tone fond. “Sassy’s smarter, she gives Lia a five-foot radius. She watches from a distance like she’s evaluating her for royal court or something which is very entertaining.”

There was more laughter.

“Sounds like a full house.”

Max nodded. “It is. But I wouldn’t trade it for anything.”

-

Back home, the house was quieter than usual.

With Max in Miami, you were managing the trio on your own. Your mother had offered to stay, but you politely declined, liking the rhythm and evolving routine; early mornings with Lia after the twins left to school, midday chaos with the twins, and long, quiet evenings watching Max on the TV while feeding the baby.

You curled onto the couch, baby Lia nestled in a wrap on your chest, Mila curled up beside you, and Luca was completely knocked out from building a Lego fortress with a secret baby princess chamber, which he assured was for both Lia and Mila.

Max’s interview played in the background. “Luca wanted to move out,” Max said on the screen, laughing.

You giggled, watching Luca’s face twitch in sleep as if he’d heard his name.

The moment made your heart ache with pride and love.

Two days later, Max came home.

The door opened quietly, he’d learned not to make noise just in case Lia was sleeping, but before he could take a step in, Mila barreled into him.

“Papa!” she squealed.

Max laughed, lifting her with one arm and dropping his bag with the other. Luca followed, hugging Max’s waist.

You appeared at the end of the hall, holding Lia with one hand and balancing a bottle in the other. “Hello babe, the house didn’t burn down.”

He met you halfway, kissing you deeply, letting his hand rest over Lia’s tiny head. “Missed you,” he whispered on your lips.

“She missed you too. She kept staring at the TV every time you talked.”

“She’s a Verstappen, she knows good racing.” Max bragged, a habit he picked since the twins were born was now at its peak after the birth of Lia. “Plus, she was conceived the night I won the fourth so she knows what’s good.” Max whispered the last part so the twins wouldn’t hear.

Later that night, the five of you, cats included, were on the bed.

Mila had brought her blanket, Luca had brought snacks which were promptly confiscated by Max. Jimmy snuggled into Max’s feet while Sassy stared at the baby with mild disapproval.

Lia gurgled softly between you, wearing a pale pink Red Bull onesie Max had been gifted by the team.

“I can’t believe we made her,” you whispered, resting your head against his shoulder.

“I know,” he whispered back, brushing his thumb along Lia’s little hand. “She’s perfect.”

“I was so scared,” you admitted. “I thought adding another baby would ruin the balance and let’s be honest, we never really thought about having another baby, we were just desperate to celebrate your championship.” You giggled, remembering the night.

Max turned to you, cupping your cheek. “You were right to be scared. But we didn’t ruin anything. We just… added more love.”

Luca yawned. “Papa, can Lia come to the next race?”

Max smiled. “Not yet, buddy. But soon.”

Mila curled next to her mother. “She needs earmuffs with her name printed, like the ones we use when we go see daddy race.”

“She’ll have them,” Max promised. “We’ll get her baby-sized ones.”

You smiled, the warmth in your chest spreading like sunlight.

“I know we have enough but… I think we need a new cat.” Max proposed.

You snorted. “Excuse me?”

Max shrugged. “It’s only fair! The twins have Jimmy and Sassy, Lia deserves her own.” Your husband worked his beautiful blue eyes on you.

“We’ll talk about it tomorrow.” You said, knowing this fight was already lost.

“Mila was also talking about a puppy after meeting Leo.”

“Max!”

[inky-duchess]

Fantasy Guide to Governesses

I've covered royal childcare in this post here but I received an ask asking for specifics surrounding the role of Governesses. So what do we need to know? For @princealienelffish22

Who is the Governess?

Governesses are the female private tutors that raise children for royal, noble or affluent families. They aren't quite servants nor are they equal to the family. In all households, the governess is usually unmarried but there have been some examples in royal households where the governess was or had been married such as Kat Ashley or Margaret, Countess of Salisbury. This was mainly to ensure she wouldn't go getting distracted by her own kids and family while she's raising somebody else's kids. If she is not a noble, she will at least be well born, at least middle class. Being a governess wasn't exactly a desired job but it was a respectable way for an unmarried woman to earn herself some cash. She will, of course, be very educated.

What does the Governess do?

A Governess is essentially a tutor. She would been in charge of teaching children the fundamental 'R's, (Reading, Writing and Arithmetic). She would teach all children but when boys reached about age 7 or so, the boys would go on to male tutors for more expansive education. The governess would teach girls up until they came out in society or even until they married, mainly teaching them languages, etiquette and chaperoning the children. She would even teach life skills such as sewing, embroidery and art to the girls in her charge. Whilst the more hands on tasks would fall on nursery staff, the governess probably had a more emotional role in the raising of the children.

Role of the Governess in the family

The thing with hiring a governess didn't mean that the kid's parents hated their babies or didn't feel like raising them. With many noble, upper class and royal families, they simply wouldn't have been able to juggle both their duties and children. This lead to many children forming attachments to their governesses that lasted lifetimes such as Queen Victoria's Baroness Lehzen. This sometimes caused tension between parents and governesses. Tension was also often caused if the governess was too close to certain members of the family like the husband or wife, because the governess was expected to distance herself unless invited. She wouldn't be invited to eat dinner with them, she would eat alone. She would come with them to their summer residence and if they were travelling. She would come and go if she wanted but she was expected to be at their beck and call.

Notable Governesses

Margaretta Eagar (funny story, she's the reason that OTMA had slight Irish accents when speaking English)

Margaret Pole, Countess of Salisbury

Madame de Maintenon (she ended up marrying the King)

Kat Ashley (stayed with Elizabeth I all her life)

Baroness Louise Lehzen (stayed with Victoria long after her marriage)

Charlotte Percy, Duchess of Northumberland

Anna Leonowens (The King and I - is this Anna)

Louise Élisabeth de Croÿ

Yolande de Polastron, Duchess of Polignac

Caroline Lamb

Edith Cavell

Anne Sullivan

Mary Wollstonecraft (before she became a writer)

Edith Cavell

Anna Whittaker

Anne Sullivan (Helen Keller's governess)

Maria Sklodowska - Curie (before she became a scientist)

Maria von Trapp (Yes, she's real and no, she's not Julie Andrews)

Marion "Crawfie" Crawford

Clara Knight

Charlotte Brontë (before her books)

[sapphlopods]

This will be one of the hardest things I ever have to do, but I need help even though I hate asking for it.

Please help me escape my homophobic and financially abusive parents. More under "Keep Reading"

I'm Chaim, and ever since I graduated high school, I’ve lived with my parents. Australia has an incredibly bad housing crisis, and it’s nearly impossible for me to move out without friends or roommates who have a pre-established house, which I have none. 

Over the course of the past 4 years, I have watched my father devolve into this angry right-wing conspiracy theorist who thinks all “Wokes” should d1e. He has no idea I’m a lesbian as I fear for what he will do if he ever finds out. 

My mother has a range of health issues, in 2022 she had a heart attack, and this year, she was diagnosed with brain and kidney cancer, which she is in and out of hospital for. Her financial assistance has been delayed over and over, we still need to wait 2 months to get help. 

So, my household's only income is from my father and me. My father has an incredibly bad gambling, drinking and tobacco addiction, he goes through a pack of 30 cans and a pack of 30 cigarettes in 2 days. Tobacco and alcohol are heavily taxed here and are upwards of $60+ each; that’s $120 every 2 days, he earns $1600 fortnightly and spends roughly $840 of it on just his addictions; that’s more than half his pay, and that isn’t including the horse races he bets on. 

That leaves me to pick up the slack on groceries, rent, my mother's medicine and lend them money when Dad “overspends” at the pub. My father would rather starve than lessen his addictions a bit so we can afford to stay in our house and have food to eat. 

This has been happening for years even before my mother fell so ill she couldn’t work but it's gotten worse. I do not want to leave my mother, but she will not leave my father no matter what since she sees nothing wrong with what he does. I’m tired of being nothing more than a piggybank and a maid to my parents since I will never be able to move out when all my money goes towards keeping a roof over our heads. Even while I was on vacation, they still called me up and asked for money. 

I’ve wanted to move out for a long time, but my situation is getting direr by the day, and I can’t save a single cent to leave like this. I know many problems are going on in the world right now that deserve people’s time more than this so thank you for reading this far. 

If you can spare anything, please send it to my ko-fi. It'll be going towards getting stuff sorted so I can move to my partner Cinna, who lives far away in Chile, but I have no other option now. 11/12

I also have a few items listed on my eBay that people might like, a lot of it is fandom stuff and collector things I have accumulated, I'll be putting more stuff up slowly as I sort through my things preparing to move. https://www.ebay.com.au/usr/sapphlopods

[goldfades]

𝐂𝐑𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐏𝐋𝐄 ───── LUKA DONCIC

free palestine carrd 🇵🇸 decolonize palestine site 🇵🇸 how you can help palestine it's crucial that we stand in solidarity with those who need our support. right now, the people of palestine are facing unimaginable hardship, and it's up to all of us to do what we can to help. whether it's raising awareness, donating to relief organizations, or supporting calls for justice and peace, every action counts. we can amplify their voices, shed light on their struggles, and work towards a future where every individual can live with dignity and freedom. your support can make a difference! FREE PALESTINE!

⟢ ┈ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 | 1.6k

⟢ ┈ 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 | (request for my lovely jo, @wanderlusturous) you, a hotheaded wnba star and your equally chaotic courtside boyfriend luka dončić take turns being menaces on and off the court, earning the title of Crash Out Couple with every tech, shove, and courtside screamfest

⟢ ┈ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 | banter, luka being an instigator, it's kinda cute

The first time you meet Luka, he’s not quite a household name yet—but he’s well on his way. The smirk, the aura, the almost reckless abandon with which he commands the court—it’s all there. You’re sitting at a bar in Manhattan after a grueling Liberty practice, sipping on some overpriced cocktail that tastes like regret and stale citrus, when he strolls in, all easy confidence and mischief. You’re vaguely aware of who he is—because, duh, basketball—but you don’t care. Not about his growing fame. Not about the headlines that tend to follow him like a stray dog.

At first, it’s just banter. He comments on the Liberty cap perched on your head like he knows something. You volley back, sharp and unbothered, because you’re you, and nobody gets to talk slick without catching a little heat. You don't even realize you're flirting until he pulls out that grin, all teeth and menace, and asks for your number like it’s the most natural thing in the world.

You give it to him—mostly because you’re intrigued by the audacity.

The rest, as they say, is history.

Fast-forward a couple of years, and the “Crash Out Couple” is practically an ESPN institution. You’d roll your eyes at the nickname if it weren’t so hilariously accurate. You, with your unapologetic on-court antics, and Luka, with his penchant for egging on entire benches, were practically made for each other. There’s a viral video that resurfaces every few months, some grainy courtside footage of Luka heckling refs while you jaw at a six-foot-four forward breathing down your neck. The caption reads, “Soulmates.” You both pretend to hate it, but the truth is, you kind of love it.

The media has their narrative: the fiery, unrelenting WNBA star and the NBA's most charming troublemaker. But what they don’t see is how it started—how the two of you fit together in a way that no one else ever really could.

Before you were dubbed half of the league’s favorite chaotic duo, you were just a girl with a chip on your shoulder and a game so good that even your doubters had to sit down and shut up. You grew up on New York asphalt, weaving through defenders who didn’t care if you were 13 or 30. You’d seen it all—trash talk, cheap shots, elbows that left bruises—and you didn’t just survive it; you thrived in it. You weren’t Sabrina Ionescu good in college—you were Sabrina Ionescu-adjacent, a little grittier, a little rougher around the edges.

By the time the Liberty scooped you up, you’d already perfected the art of letting people underestimate you. On the court, you were all business—sharp elbows, sharper words. Off the court, you weren’t much different.

And Luka? He had the same energy, just dressed up in a European accent and a billion-dollar smile.

So when the two of you finally crossed paths, it wasn’t fireworks or love at first sight or any of that fairytale nonsense. It was a slow build, a series of exchanges that started as friendly competition and escalated into something neither of you could ignore. You pushed him; he pushed back. You taunted; he laughed. And when the time came, he showed up for you the way you didn’t even realize you needed.

The arena hums with energy, a pulsing beat of chatter, sneakers squeaking on hardwood, and the occasional blare of the PA system announcing players warming up. You’re on the court, loose-limbed and laser-focused, bouncing a ball between your hands as the Liberty logo gleams under the bright lights. The crowd’s a blur, faces blending together, but you know exactly where Luka is without looking.

He’s courtside, leaned back like he’s sitting on his own throne, wearing that damn smile that always means trouble. He’s dressed low-key—a hoodie and jeans—but the way he carries himself, you’d think he was the one suiting up to play.

“You look nervous,” he calls out, loud enough for half the court to hear.

You roll your eyes, dribbling lazily as you make your way toward him. “Why would I be nervous? You’re not the one guarding me.”

He raises an eyebrow, feigning offense. “That’s a shame. I’d shut you down in five minutes.”

“Five?” you fire back, smirking now. “I’d have you in foul trouble in two.”

The assistant coach whistles sharply, breaking the moment as you’re called back into the fold. You turn, already putting him out of your mind, but not before Luka leans forward, his voice following you.

“Just don’t get ejected, okay? I want my money’s worth.”

You don’t look back, but your grin gives you away.

The game starts, and it’s clear from the jump that they’re gunning for you. You’re no stranger to being a target, but tonight it feels personal. Every time you touch the ball, there’s a defender glued to you—sometimes two, sometimes three. They’re in your face, hands swiping, shoulders digging into you on every drive.

It’s annoying, but you don’t let it show. Not yet.

You’re still finding your rhythm when the first cheap shot comes—an elbow to your ribs during a fast break. You stumble, barely, and the ref doesn’t call it. Luka is on his feet instantly, arms raised as he shouts something in Slovenian that’s definitely not family-friendly.

You wave him off with a quick glance and grit your teeth, setting up on the next possession. They want to frustrate you, throw you off your game. Fine. Two can play that.

By the second quarter, it’s obvious they’re not letting up. A hard screen sends you sprawling, and when you get up, your expression is thunderous. The forward who set the screen smirks, muttering something you can’t hear but understand perfectly. You take a step toward her, jaw tight, but your teammates pull you back before the whistle can blow.

From the corner of your eye, you catch Luka laughing, leaning into the drama like it’s his own personal soap opera. He’s clapping now, shouting something about “that’s my girl!”

It’s all fuel. Every shove, every sneer, every comment—you take it, you feed on it, and you channel it into the next play. You cut through the defense with surgical precision, drawing fouls and making them pay. By halftime, you’ve put up enough points to silence most of the chirping.

But Luka? Luka’s louder than ever.

When the buzzer sounds, you jog off the court toward the locker room, passing by Luka on your way. He’s waiting, still grinning like he’s enjoying this more than anyone else in the building.

“Having fun yet?” he teases, leaning over the railing.

You stop, towel slung over your shoulder, and level him with a look. “Oh, I’m just getting started.”

He throws his head back, laughing, and for a second, you forget how much your ribs hurt.

By the time the third quarter starts, you’re running on pure adrenaline. Your body aches, your jersey clings to your skin, and the defenders are still swarming you like vultures over a carcass. But you’ve got that look in your eye—the one that tells everyone, including Luka, that you’re done playing nice.

They keep testing you, and you keep answering. Elbow jabs in the paint? Fine, you’ll fight through them. Double teams in the corner? Bring it on. But there’s only so much a person can take before they hit their breaking point.

And that point comes when you drive to the basket, slipping past one defender before the next one—a towering forward with about four inches and twenty pounds on you—steps into your path. She doesn’t go for the ball. Instead, she throws her shoulder into you with enough force to send you stumbling back.

The ref blows the whistle, finally calling the foul, but you barely hear it over the rush of blood in your ears.

The forward grins, smug, like she’s gotten away with something. And that’s it. You snap.

Without thinking, you shove her—hard. Hard enough that her sneakers screech against the hardwood as she stumbles back a few steps, eyes wide with shock. The crowd erupts into chaos, the kind of noise that rattles your bones.

She comes back at you immediately, barking something that you don’t catch because your teammates are already between you, dragging you back while her team does the same. The refs are blowing their whistles like it’s a lifeline, trying to regain control.

And Luka? He’s on his feet, losing his mind.

“That’s what I’m talking about!” he yells, clapping his hands so loud you can hear it over the chaos. “Push her again! She deserved it!”

You glance his way, and the sight of him is almost enough to make you laugh. Almost. He’s leaning so far over the railing it looks like he might climb onto the court, his hoodie halfway off, gesturing wildly as he yells something in Slovenian that probably translates to “start the fight!”

The announcers are having a field day. The crowd is on their feet. Social media is already typing up their captions.

But you? You’re still locked in, eyes blazing as you stare down your defender, silently daring her to come at you again.

The refs eventually restore order, handing out double techs for good measure, but the damage is done. The entire arena is buzzing, and you can feel the shift in momentum.

You walk back to the bench, chin high, and when you sit down, Luka catches your eye again. He’s grinning like he’s never been prouder in his life.

“You really gave them their money’s worth,” he calls out, voice practically dripping with pride.

You grab a water bottle, smirking despite yourself. “You’re welcome.”

The rest of the game plays out like a blur. The other team never quite recovers, and the Liberty take the win. By the time the final buzzer sounds, your name is trending, along with Luka’s, under the now-iconic title: Crash Out Couple.

↳ make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated !

↳ thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡

[abbysimsfun]

Sims In Bloom: Generation 2 Pt. 147 (Looking to the Future)

Heather's pregnancy progressed well into her second trimester. Changes in appetite and appearance were par for the course and she handled them like a seasoned pro. This baby would probably be her last, and she was grateful to be healthy, especially as construction on Buttercup Pet Clinic's remodel was well underway.

But between the spider bite in the jungle and the stress of Ash's kidnapping early in her pregnancy, good health felt like a blessing.

Conrad was always great help managing their household, and these days were no different. He walked the dog after work and spent time with the kids, giving Heather extra time to work with the architect and construction crew at her clinic.

While Ash was in San Myshuno for a weekend with the Landgraabs, the Gordons were surprised by a visit from the ghost of Boomer, Heather's white cat who died before Winterfest. Though most of the Gordons were now seasoned veterans when it came to ghosts, this was Lavender's first interaction with an ethereal being. She looked cautiously at the cat, but soon broke into giggles, leaning down to try to pat Boomer's head.

The encounter reminded Heather and Conrad not to keep Ben and Captain Whitaker waiting. Though their home was always busy and soon to be even more full, Heather brought it up the day before Ash was set to return from the city.

"Lavender loves all the pets," she said, pulling out her phone to check her schedule. "I have fewer appointments this week, and I think when Ash comes home we should go out to Deadgrass Isle with some ambrosia treats. We can leave Lavender with Hazel and Suri, but Ash should be there if he wants to be. After what you told me Rafa heard from Marco, I feel like I need to do everything I can to make him good, teach him empathy."

"We changed things," Conrad insisted. "He's not going to be whoever he was going to be."

"But he was kidnapped. Counselors say he seems fine, but what if the curse...? What if we can't change things?"

"What if nothing. The counselors are professionals, and they'd say if they thought anything was wrong."

Heather nodded. "I need you - and the counselors - to be right."

On a rainy Saturday in San Myshuno, Ash was hanging out with his father and sister Bridgette - but he was cornered, alone, by a figure he'd been attempting to avoid. He sneered at Marco's ghost, who left crystals of sand on the tiles beneath his feet. "What do you want? I don't want to help you!"

"I don't need your help! I've been trying to give you a message."

"I don't want to talk to you."

"If you don't, I'll never go away. If I don't tell you this, I'll never cross over."

"Fine. Say it or whatever."

"You've always been a brat, huh?" Marco curled his lip in frustration. "Look, in the future, you're the most celebrated college kid on the planet. You invented time travel."

"I...what?"

"That man from the future who's been all over the news? Emit Relevart only got here because you, a genius little shit, invent time travel before you turn twenty. At least you did. But we changed things."

"I'm not even ten. I don't know the first thing about time travel!"

"Maybe not now, but in one of your only interviews with the press, you said you became obsessed with the idea before high school and programmed the remote that first jumped through time for an extra credit project. You earned admiration, accolades, fame, and competition. But some people hate you for being the first, and others hate the thought of messing with time; they fear you for what you can do, and for your name."

"I haven't done anything!"

"You will! At least, you were supposed to, but taking you left you with a healthy fear of traveling through time, and I get it. That's my bad! But someone who's just as smart is out there right now hoping they'll be the one to discover time travel. They would have, if you hadn't done it first. They were close, but they're more careless than you. Since no one can get close to you - least of all Ximena - they're the one who sold her the faulty remote that got me killed."

"Who is it?"

"I'm not allowed to tell you that. I don't even think I know their real name, anyway."

"Not allowed by who?"

"The Grim Reaper! That bag of old bones broke a lot of rules to keep me here, and you don't even want to listen. But Grim won't walk me through to the other side until I tell you that you need to be the one to invent time travel or else it'll be too unstable."

"Why didn't Grim tell me himself?"

"He's not allowed to pass on last words, but we both agreed you needed to know this. The fabric of space and time is at stake here!"

"Maybe sims who mess with time travel should deal with it being unstable."

Marco growled and Ash peeled back in fear. "You don't get it. Time travel will be invented one way or another. Now that Emit's here, sims are intrigued. It's inevitable. Time travel will exist, but simanity can either do it the right way...or the wrong way."

"And I'm the right way?"

"Just barely." Marco shrugged. "I'm a bad guy, right? Bad guys want time travel, and everyone has an opinion about whether it messes with some grand design, but this is history we shouldn't mess with."

"Our friends, Felix and Lilith, are trying to make a time traveling device to help Emit find a time thief from the future. Can't they invent it instead? Then the other sim won't do it."

"You better help them, Ash Landgraab. History doesn't like to be changed too much, and I don't think they're going to do it without you."

Ash frowned. "How do you know? Why are you telling me this?"

The door opened with a click and Malcolm smiled at his son in the empty room. "Who are you talking to? And why is there sand on the floor? Where'd it come from?"

Ash looked nervously at his father. Marco had disappeared, and Ash suspected he'd never see him again, despite his unanswered questions. "Uh, Dad, can I tell you something?"

"Of course."

"Sometimes, I can see ghosts. Just now, I was talking to the ghost of the man who kidnapped me."

Malcolm laughed. "What do you mean?"

"I see ghosts. Real ghosts who died, just like I almost did when I was little."

Malcolm furrowed his brow. "How long have you known you see ghosts? Do your mother and Conrad know?"

Ash nodded. "They know ghosts aren't all scary, but they can't see as many ghosts as I can."

"What did you and the ghost talk about?"

"He said I still have to be the one to invent time travel or else it'll change the future too much."

Malcolm grinned. This all sounded too far fetched to be believed, but he played along with his creative son's often wild imagination.

"Is that all? We certainly wouldn't be disappointed to have a genius inventor in the family!" ->

<- Previous Chapter | Gen 2 Start | Gen 2.1 Summary

Gen 1 Start | Gen 1 Summary

NOTE: Programming won the poll when I asked what skill Ash should max in his teens, and even though programming doesn't actually help with time travel via gameplay (yet?), it's all coming together with the plot!

[saltnsugarbear]

where you told me even if we died tonight (that I'd die yours)

summary: Tyler doesn't like winter usually, but he's learning to live with it

title from: "House In Nebraska" by Ethel Cain

word count: 0.7k

content warnings: um none really!!! gets a little spicy at the end though <3

side note: for my beloved Moon! our beloved cowboy <3 my tornado wrangler Moon i adore you <3

Tyler hated winter.

Winter meant no tornado season! It's was a lazy season for the crews content creation, spending the extra free time preparing for the next tornado season.

Everyone bundled up either away in the camper or their respective homes. Tyler retreated to his house in Nebraska.

Not really his, but yours. You lived just outside of Grand Island on a decent amount of land. Most of it was covered in trees but you had a small enough barn on your property to house two cows and a smaller coop for your chickens.

It was a quiet life that the Wranglers had been shocked by, mouths agape when they first came to your house for dinner. You were the exact opposite of what they expected for Tyler. Quiet, reserved, relaxed.

You liked the quiet life you had, driving into town for weekly farmers markets and selling your animal products and produce to the people in town. It was almost comical how much your life resembled that of a fantasy.

But being such meant you were an early riser and well.... That was maybe Tyler's least favorite part. Waking up to an empty bed every morning was upsetting for anyone. Especially when he thinks he's worn you out the night before only to open his eyes to an empty pillow.

But he knows you love your animals. Knows you cherish the routine and home you've created for yourself here. So he wouldn't ask you to change it.

In fact he kind of likes being your house husband, only bringing in a third of the household earnings didn't emasculate him. Albeit you weren't actually married. He liked getting to cook and tidy up and just exist.

You never expected him to provide or help out but took it graciously. He learned your storage methods and how you liked your coffee and how dark you liked your steak.

All of this to say, he has your second cup of coffee ready for you when you come in from the barn. Your routine was just as easy to learn as your coffee order and you came inside the house at nearly the exact same time everyday.

So the mug is waiting for you when you enter the house, beelining for the kitchen.

Tyler is leaning on his elbows on the counter, forehead resting against the mug in his hands and eyes shut. He does a better job of wearing himself out than you. Your footsteps don't wake him as you approach the peninsula counter, sidling up to his side. You're soft with your kiss to his cheek, pecking along his scruff and making him stir.

"Morning, cowboy..." You whisper, pressing another kiss to his cheek before backing off. He huffs while you wrap your hands around the mug, settling a little aways from him.

"G'morning..." Tyler sighs, leaning up against the counter to stand straight. He sets his mug down before resting his hands on the counter to brace his weight.

He notices your lack of winter clothes, brow furrowing as he looks around for them. Tyler spots your jacket, hat and gloves over the side of the couch, slowly piecing together your plan.

"Someone's eager this morning," Tyler grins at you, pushing off the counter to corner you against it. He's smooth as you takes the mug from your hands, setting it just out of reach from both of you. You can't help but match his grin.

"Need to warm up somehow...." You say, sliding your hands around to rest along his lower back.

"Really? And what way might that be?" He tries to feign innocence, bracketing your body with his arms while he places his hands on the counter.

"Oh, I think you know..." You tease him, pushing your hips to meet his. You can feel the slight bulge in his low resting pants that tells you he's on the same page.

"Care to enlighten me? Think I need a little help getting the hint.." Tyler teases but you're all too eager to please, surging forward and kissing him roughly. A complete opposite to your soft hands over his stomach.

Maybe Tyler didn't hate winter if it meant living like this.

[weilongfu]

Unfiltered Sunburn

(The "alpha pissing contest" Po mentioned during Chlorinated Salt Water. It's 1000000% wish fulfillment Earn hate. Don't judge.)

"Excuse me for a moment," Thame said with a smile and a gentle squeeze of Po's hand. "I'll be right back and the next round is on me." Po gave Thame a look. "What?" Thame squeezed Po's hand again. "I'll be fine, I'm just going to the bathroom."

After looking around the room, Po squeezed back. "Okay, don't come back too quick. I think Baifern will enjoy being conscious for a few moments even if it means you're not here."

Thame watched Baifern stir at the sound of her name and winked in her direction despite Po's annoyed huff. Understandably, Baifern shrieked and fainted again. "She says I'm not her bias, but that keeps happening. What would happen if I invited Per here tonight?"

"Other than Gam killing you?" Thame only smiled in response. "You're a menace."

"Just for you," Thame said before kissing the back of Po's hand, earning another round of cooing and screams as he walked away.

The bathroom was quiet when Thame entered but the door opened with a loud bang as he zipped up his fly to leave.

"So you're dating Po."

Thame only gave Earn the pleasure of being viewed from the corner of his eyes. "I am."

"And how much did he pay you just to get you to come to the party tonight?" Earn leaned against the wall by the urinal. The smell of alcohol, urinal cake, and something like photo developer solution was beginning to stick to Thame's nose and of the three, he wasn't sure which was Earn's scent. "Or did he ask as a favor back when you both worked for ONER?"

"Neither," Thame replied as he moved to wash his hands. "I pursued him, I wooed him, we danced one of the oldest dances two people might dance, and now I'm here." Thame flicked the water off his hands before moving to the air dryer. "And what about you?" Thame timed it perfectly and failed to hear Earn's annoyed huff over the running machine. "How did you get P'Po to date you? I can't imagine it was your smarts, your wits..." Thame looked over his shoulder at Earn. "Or your capabilities."

"I was- AM very capable. He thought he was helping me, supporting me because he loved me, but I did plenty on my own! I'm a CEO of my own successful company-"

"That P'Po did all the design and promotional work for. That you took all the credit for and only wanted to give him credit for after he became famous and it'd be even more advantageous for you." Thame nodded and turned to face Earn at last before leaning against the wall by the sink. "That is a kind of capable. I've seen it a lot with managers that get fired before the end of their first month."

Earn sputtered. "You have a lot of nerve for a washed-up idol."

"Well I did only just wash my hands. It'll take a bit for me to wash the rest of myself in a sink and get rid of the rest of my nerve if that's what you want, phi."

Earn finally growled and moved to get into Thame's face, but Thame was quicker and despite being nearly the same height, Thame tipped his head up and Earn wound up looking down at their shoes. Thame growled low and even the grumbles from Earn's throat stopped. Here, backed against a wall, the smell of musk and leather began to override the smell of photo developer.

"Thank you, phi, for educating me on the kind of partner you were." Thame continued to tip his head up just to look down on Earn. "Shallow, selfish, rude, and impulsive. I promise to take even better care of P'Po so he'll forget all about you and continue to be even happier. Please look forward to it."

Earn sneered at the floor and Thame resisted knocking Earn over so he could kiss it. Another huff and Earn shoved Thame aside and stormed out, leaving the scent of anger and shame in his wake. Thame breathed out and felt the tension leave his body before washing his face slightly to remove the smell from his nose and leaving the bathroom.

"You're back," Po said with a small smile as Thame sat back down. He glanced over at the bar where Earn was throwing back drinks a little vehemently. "Did Earn talk to you in there?"

"A little, he wanted to make sure I was taking good care of you, P'Po." Thame smiled. "And I made sure to tell him I was."

"Kyaaaaaa!" Baifern, now recovered and resting her cheek against her hand, gave a breathy sigh. "Mr. A and Mr. B, you look so cute together."

"Don't we, phi?" Thame threw his arm around Po's shoulders and pulled him closer despite Po's protests to Baifern. "I think P'Po is the best for me."

"He is! Ai Po! You better not waste this opportunity!"

"Oh, that reminds me!" Thame snapped his fingers before pulling out his phone. "I should be thanking you, P'Baifern, you helped P'Po find his way to me. Should I call Pepper and have him say hi to you?"

Baifern fainted again and Po raised his hand to get a waiter.

"Check please."

[kyufessions]

customer service

synopsis: you get into a small argument with your boyfriend over facetime

pairings: idol, boyfriend! jaemin x g.n. reader

genre: angst w/ a happy ending, drabble(?)

word count: 1.1k

general taglist: @jwnghyuns @eaudenana @soobin-chois

jaemin smiles to himself as he listens to you telling him about your day at work, the corner of his lips turning downward as you tell him about a rude customer you encountered today.

“you didn’t deserve that baby, i’m sorry.” he responded, propping his phone up against the extra pillow on his hotel bed as he laid against the other.

on the screen you dismissed his apology, chuckling at it, even. “don’t apologize, it’s not your fault people can’t respect customer service workers.” he watches you smile as you take a sip of your hot chocolate, taking note of the colorful marshmallows you used that he specifically filled up in the cupboard before he left home three weeks ago. “how’s tour? are you taking care of yourself? please say yes.”

nodding, he adjusts himself on the bed so his elbow is propping up his head to properly face the phone. as he lays on his side, he hates how you’re on a screen and not directly across from him or better yet: next to him. “tour is good, i just wish you were with me to experience it with me.”

you knew where this conversation was headed. you’ve had this same exact argument many times before that ultimately led nowhere but into space, never to be heard of again until months or weeks later. “jaemin-“

he grips some of his hair in his fist, not tightly but enough to grab onto it to feel a little something. as he sighs, he sits up a little more to come across more serious. “i don’t know why you don’t just quit your job.” he starts talking with his hands as he speaks, the phone moving as he continues to speak. you put down your mug on the coaster and hug a pillow to your chest to brace yourself for the same exact talk you’ve had before. “you don’t exactly love your job, you complain about it a lot. you don’t even make a lot yet you still stay there.” he lets out a deep sigh before continuing on, both of his hands taking a quick break to run through his locks and landing on top of his pillow. “i make enough for the both of us to live comfortably. lavishly even, if we wanted. you wouldn’t have to work, just stay home and do whatever you want. i don’t get-“

“because jaemin, how would that look if i just stayed home all day not contributing to the household at all while you do all the work and bring in all the money?” he stares at you blankly through the screen, waiting for you to continue. “lazy, jaemin. it would make me look lazy. and spoiled. and look like a good-for-nothing partner that doesn’t do anything but clean around the house, cook, look pretty and use their hard earned boyfriend's money. i’m not going to be that person.”

“but that’s not how you’d look!” he protests, rolling his eyes before continuing to speak. “i want you to live comfortably doing whatever you want to do-“

“then let me work, jaemin! i’m tired of having to work a stupid retail job, yes. but i also enjoy this stupid retail job, it’s annoying but it’s the same type of annoying that your job is.” you begin slouching deeper into the couch with a huff, your bottom lip pursing out slightly. “plus my job has good benefits. i don’t mind working. if you want me to cut back on my hours, fine. just say that, use your words; we’re both adults. but stop pestering me to leave my job.”

“i just want to take care of you without worry, that’s all. i don’t want you to have to worry about a roof over your head, about your next meal or clothes or-“

“as much as i appreciate that jaemin, and i really do, trust me, i feel a sense of accomplishment when i have a job. if i did not have a job, i would feel lost and out of control. and spending your money would make me feel bad because it’s your hard earned money, not mine. besides, my compact has great insurance and my coworkers are wonderful to work with- it’s a fun environment. just- please stop asking me about it, okay? i’m sick and tired of the same old discussion.”

jaemin nods, taking everything you say with consideration. you’ve told him every time how much you enjoy your job despite the complaints, but he never believed you- or maybe just refused to believe you. jaemin was a firm believer in doing things that made you happy, and if you weren’t happy then find something that did. so that’s all he was trying to do- but he sees now that he was wrong about that. he didn’t take into consideration the amount of time you’d have to spend alone while he was at practice, out at schedules, or even touring if you didn’t have a job. if all you did was stay home, at first he thought you would love the idea until he realized that that isn’t the type of person you are. you’ve been working since you were a teenager and have loved it ever since. so who was he to think your stop now?

he lays his head on the pillow, his eyes never leaving yours from the phone screen. “i’m sorry, baby. i just want the best for you, and only you know what’s best for you. so i’m sorry my baby.” you start to reassure him how it’s fine until he says it’s not. “you’re a hard worker and i love you for that, okay? i love that so much, and so much more. im sorry. i’ll make it up to you when we get back.”

you just laugh at how soft he’s become, picking back up your mug and holding it in your hands for warmth as it gets colder during the ungodly hour. “thank you for apologizing jaem, i appreciate it.” you pause for a brief moment, smiling at him. you admire the look on his face. the way his eyes are looking at you through the screen, the corner of his lips, and the way his skin is glowing so effortlessly. and all he’s doing is just laying there, freshly woken up and ready to take on the day in another random city. “i love you.”

the words bring butterflies to his stomach, the joy hard to hide as he refuses to disguise itself behind a tired facade. “i love you more, my royalty.”

“you’re a liar.” ensues an argument that goes on for another fifteen minutes before jaemin has to leave for schedules. but not before allowing you to win the ‘i love you’ game you two always play.

[eulaliasims]

Round 4, Hill Farm 1 / 8

Over at the Hill household, Jia is doing a excellent job taking care of the sheep, and Drustan has been stuck with laundry.

Drustan: Why do I have to do the laundry, outside, in the cold? :(

Because you have a want to earn a cleaning point.

One baby sibling was enough for Dunk, thanks.

Jia: Hang on a minute, Sun—UNCLE DOGGY!

That's actually Elmet's nickname forever, much to his deep regret.

Sun: Jia says she doesn't like horses because they can't really fly, but I think that's stupid. Horses are great. You can braid their hair and they can run REALLY fast. Do you have a horse on the farm, Uncle?

Eisu: No, we haven't had one for quite a long time.

Sun: You should get one, then. The ones with a white blaze on the nose are the best ones, but—

Sun talks a lot more than her mum ever did.

Hate that I know this about you!

Drustan also wants to gain a cooking skill point, so his dads have let him take over cooking duties for a while to practice.

Drustan: It's supposed to look like that... right?

He's not having a good time with this baby, btw.

[crystlizabeth]

The Riley household dealing with a complication at school.

The girls are about 7-8! All children are oc!

Just watch this video https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT89KHjBj/

Simon and you having to talk to Sa’diya and Zhuri because Diya has been getting bullied and Zhuri is not having it but her sister won’t tell her the girls name. Now you sit in the living room in front of the two girls your oldest son watching from the side, laughing her and there not helping the situation.

“Zhuri you don’t need to be fighting nobody.” You spoke to your daughter.

“What is it?” Zhuri asked speaking over her mother as well as ignoring her. Sa’diya sitting next to her looking as her mom with teary eyes Simon sitting on the table as he watch you with the girls.

“Zhuri love, look at me.” Simon spoke trying to get her out of Diyas face.

Zhuri side-eyed her father looking straight back as her twin, “Sy what is her name.” Zhuris tone stern.

The look Simon received caused Elijah to laugh covering his mouth when his parent looked at their 15 year old. “What Z is standing on business.”

You signed “mmhm I know but if she fights one more little girl the have to change schools.” You whipped your face.

“The all deserved it though mama, they’re lil brats.” ‘Lijah spoke his arms falling over his chest.

“Listen Diya nobody should bully you like, you’re such a smart girl beautiful girl baby, don’t let those lil shits words get to your head.” You spoke looking at her, he giving you a small nod.

Simon though Zhuri had ever right to act like this somebody was billing her sister as she wasn’t standing for it. Sa’diya was never good with words or ever felt like she could speak up despite how you and him were raising the girls. So Zhuri did it for her.

“What is her name!”

“Zhuri you cant be in her face like that love.” You spoke, Diyas teary eyes looking at her sister.

“She won’t tell me her name.” Zhuri mumbling sitting forward now out of her face, her dark eyes never met yours, only glanced at Simon.

“Why do you wanna know her name love?” Simon asked.

The little girl didn’t answer him, let’s just say it was a long night thw though the would have to discuss it the next day again. But when Simon got a call from the school that he need to come pick up his daughters because of an incident.

Now here we are on the couch again Zhuri with a little smile on her face kicking her feet, she was pleased with herself. Diya was also smiling.

“Okay tell your mum what happened.” Simon said standing next to you his hand on your waist. He could feel your stress poor out of your pours.

“You’re not in trouble Zhuri, what happened.” You spoke.

“Umm well, I tried not to tell Ari that girl name, but she found out and went over to that girl, and she went over and caped her..” Sa’diya spoke, “she told her ‘don’t you touch my sister no more.’” She finished.

Zhuri from the side of her speaking up “And I would do it again!” She said a fat grin on her face.

You couldn’t help but giggle “Zhuri okay.. oh my god.. what was the lil girls name.” You chuckled, the two boy around you laughing.

“Stormy, and I made sure to show her the true storm.”

“Girl bye. You showed her the storm.” You laughed.

“Mmhm.. so dose this mean I don’t have to go to school tomorrow.” She asked. You looked at your husband leaving this part to him because you couldn’t be serious with her right now after what she said.

“No, but you still are doing school work at home.” Simon spoke earning a groan from her.

“Looks like you’ll be going to school with Aliyah,” he spoke.

“YAY! and we’ll get to see uncle Johnny more too!”

Simon chuckled taking the girls in his arms when the came over to him. He never taught them to resorted to violence but he never opposed to it and Zhuri was a fighter and a girl who hated seeing the people she loved be brought down, so he might have told Zhuri this was an exception.



[hollowcryofthegodless]

Sengoku Era Hashira headcanons

These headcanons have been microwaving since June, as I've always wanted to write about them, but life gets in my way sometimes. You might even get to know more about them once we finally get to Kokushibou's POV in Hinokami's Future! But now, dumb bullet points. I might even make a timeline about them if you guys get confused with their ages.

[Read More because it's Long, uhhhh content warnings for teen pregnancy and murder]

Yoriichi Tsugikuni

Became a demon slayer at 16, his wife was killed when he was 15 and trained for nine months

Became a Hashira at just two months and began teaching his colleagues breathing techniques for easier time killing demons

Was 20 when he reunited with his brother and introduced him to the corps

Exiled from the corps at 24, after letting Tamayo go and the announcement that Michikatsu became a demon

Searched for Michikatsu in his remaining life

Became head of the Tsugikuni household to provide for Michikatsu's abandoned family, using Michikatsu's name. was a very hands-off head and doesn't even fight anymore.

He'd been a Hashira for 8 years before being exiled

Michikatsu Tsugikuni

Became a demon slayer at 21 after a year of training, became the Moon Hashira in half a year

Unlocked the mark before he became a Hashira, hence his promotion

Unpopular with most Hashira because of his antisocial and direct personality

Hates the Rumbling Hashira’s guts for basically poking fun of him and his need to be better than his brother

His breathing technique is hard to learn with its many forms, which is why most of his students gravitate towards Yoriichi's more, to his jealousy

Sends his family all of his allowance with the condition they never contact him again

Reluctantly slots himself back to the older brother role

Began vomiting up blood and has dizzy spells when he turned 24

His last conversation with Yoriichi was basically lambasting all of his insecurities towards his brother

Cares about the other Hashiras, actually, and seeing them die breaks him more and made him resent Yoriichi and the mark they all earned

Killed the Rumbling Hashira first (bozo) after he became a demon

Was a Hashira for 3 years before becoming a demon on the eve of his 25th birthday

Hijurou Rengoku

His name literally means fire

Three years older than Yoriichi and Michikatsu

The same Rengoku who found Yoriichi weeping at his wife's side and put him on the corps

Was the one who developed Flame Breathing and unlocked his mark at the age of 20

Dies at the age of 25 sick

His younger brother, six years his junior, becomes the Flame Hashira after his death

Very optimistic, bright, and friendly, the only one who worries over Michikatsu outside of his brother

Michikatsu visits him before he died

His presence within the corps was calming and peaceful that after he died nothing stays the same

He'd been a Hashira for 8 years

Married young at the age of 15, so he sympathized with Yoriichi’s dilemma

Had three children, his first was when he was 18, the next when he'd been 19, and the last when he was 23

Yuukijurou Rengoku

勇気 (courage, spirit)

Met Yoriichi when he was 15, Michikatsu when he was 17

Three years their junior

Unlocked his mark at the age of 16

Had a crush on Michikatsu

Married at 21

Had a child immediately, but the child dies due to sickness so he resolves to teach Hijurou's first son Flame Breathing

After Hijurou died, he became more spiteful and blamed Yoriichi for the marks

developed an alcohol addiction after Hijurou died

The same man who was part of Yoriichi’s trial when he spared Tamayo

Was killed by Kokushibou at the age of 23 when he finds the Rengoku estate

Hid Hijurou's children and tried to take Kokushibou on

Akito Izakuchi

義人 (righteous person) 雷 (literally thunder)

A year younger than the Tsugikuni twins

Is golden haired, and was considered a blessing by his parents because of it. He sees himself as thunder due to his hair color.

Became a demon slayer at 14, was promoted to Hashira at the age of 19

Unlocked his mark at the same age as his promotion

Michikatsu hates him, although he has a reason

According to Michikatsu, he hides his cowardice by taunting his peers, mostly the Moon Hashira

He never gets his name right, when he and Michikatsu go on missions together Akito asks personal questions, he acts innocent when he insults him, and finally he learns of Michikatsu's motivations and delves more into his mockery of him

Died at the age of 24 indirectly by Kokushibou. When he found out Upper Moon One was hunting down the Hashiras, he made his younger brother protect him

Kokushibou is enraged that he would put his brother in danger, he turns his brother into a demon and forced him to feed on Akito

Consequently, his younger brother became the first Upper Moon Two

Was a former tsuguko of Michikatsu, before switching to Sun Breathing and then developing Thunder Breathing from it. Michikatsu never forgave him for ditching his studies for his brother.

Kanae and Shinobu's ancestor

Yuuya Mizumoto

優 (gentleness) 穏 (calm) 水 (water) 元 (origin), because he's the first Water Hashira

Two years older than the Tsugikuni twins

Became a demon slayer at 15, was promoted to a Hashira at 18

Unlocked his mark when he was 19

Mellow and quiet, but he's an exemplary and assertive teacher when the situation needs him to be

Yuuya and Yoriichi usually pair up if Hijurou is not around or he feels overwhelmed by his exuberant personality

Yoriichi’s second student, and was close to Hijurou who was his other student

Died unexpectedly after having dizzy spells and vomiting blood, in his sleep

Michikatsu attended the funeral and went to a tizzy trying to solve why he died suddenly and Yoriichi didn't speak for a week

His tsuguko becomes the next Water Hashira and is the one who condemned Yoriichi after his brother betrayed him

Aoi's ancestor

Masaaki Kazahari

真 (truth) 秋 (autumn) 風 (wind) 張 (stretch)

The only Hashira the same age as the Tsugikuni twins, just a few months older

Became a demon slayer at 14, became a Hashira a few months after Yoriichi did

Didn't like Yoriichi and didn't learn from him because he thinks he has a superiority complex, so was surprised when he got to know him and learned he was humble

But goddamn his brother is worse and makes him feel a whole lot bad about his jealousy toward Yoriichi

His death was the main reason why everyone found out about the time limit the marks gave them

His sister is the next Wind Hashira after him (she was present at the trial with Yoriichi, and she tried to get him to stay to no avail)

Mitsuri's ancestor

Tsuyoshi Ishihara

強 (strong) 志 (aspiration) 石 (stone) 原 (origin)

Surprisingly, despite his large and tall physique, he is the youngest of them all, four years younger than the Tsugikuni twins

He became a demon slayer at 13, and became a Hashira at 17

The last surviving Hashira outside of Yoriichi, he was the only one who vouched for his mentor before he was exiled

Was killed by Kokushibou in his 24th birthday

Accepted his death and smiled at his old friend

no descendants since he was fully devoted to the demon slayer cause

[sickofthis666]

Your recent post tags are so real like. I never really felt like a woman, I looked around and was like omg what’s wrong with me everyone is feminine and woman like and I don’t feel like. And now I’m like yeah. Cause being a woman is not a ‘feeling’ it’s not being a ‘girlie pop’ with ‘girlie’ hobbies like. I was born a female thus I am a female. And I’m not any less woman because my personality traits are various and not gender construct fitting. Sighhhh.

(anon is referring to the tags on this post if I'm not wrong)

IKR! Like ever since hearing the argument "feeling like a woman" my only reaction was "wtf does that mean? bc despite one for so long, I somehow missed the memo" or thinking of sexist bs like wearing heels, putting on make up, etc. OR if we're getting dark, feeling like a woman is walking home alone at night and noticing how every one else on the street is a man/men and praying tonight is not the night you get raped. Like yeah the only womanly feeling I've ever had is when feeling like prey or when being treated differently from men in an ostentatious way. Sure I hate linking being a woman to being a prey but it's also my lived experience...

And YEAH growing up a teenage girl was SO confusing and lonely?? Like suddenly 99% of the girls around you follow those new arbitrary rules out of NOWHERE, like shaving x body part and wearing make up a certain way, and I was just standing there like?? What is going on?? What happened? WHY? Why are you doing this? Why ain't the boys? WHY are you not questioning this AT ALL??? And copying each other like mindless drones??? Why am I the only one bothered by this?? CAN ANYBODY HEAR ME???

Like idk maybe it's bc I grew up in a "relatively" sexism-free household, like despite my mom doing the childcare and cooking and laundry, she also had a full time job and a PhD (contrary to women who give up on long studies/careers to have kids) and earned more than my dad, so basically as a kid I thought sexism was something on the way out/threatened with extinction?? Like my parents never told me I couldn't do or be something bc it's a boy thing or bc I was a girl.

Like I hate the words femininity, feminine, masculine, etc, bc it's all bs, made up to enforce sexism. Nothing is inherently feminine nor masculine, and those can't be "reclaimed" bc they're prison bars, no matter how you assemble them you'll get a prison as result. I really thought we were on the way to get rid of that bs but that was just too good to be true ig.

Being a woman is just a feature, I was born this way the same way I was born with brown eyes, and it should be a category like any other, taken into account only when necessary (medically, etc).

Sorry for the rant lol, but I've just never felt like I could discuss this with other women before, not without being seen as a weirdo.

[sokkastyles]

I totally agree with everything you answered and I love the way you analyze and delve into what is not explicitly stated in the world of Avatar.

I also thought about the point you made about Azula resenting Zuko for not being able to be an older brother to her. And now I want to add that I thought that Azula facing Vision-Zuko, perhaps is a way of showing that she subconsciously recognizes that Zuko was hurt by her and at the same time hates him and blames him for everything that happened to her and her family. Because she out loud blames Ursa, Mai and Taylee, but she never blames Zuko (individually) which is the common factor in the whole matter

Now moving on to another subject, I want to consult about this thought that I have

I think that in the Avatar universe being a prodigy is something that really has no value and is not recognized among the characters themselves (unless you are the Avatar). On the other hand, being considered a prodigy is more a quality and symbolism of a villain who is a bender and that ends up being punished (Ex Azula, Amon, Yun from Kioshi's book

And I think that something that supports my theory is that the The creators themselves spoke in an interview (which I read from the avatar wiki) that said that they advocated for the belief that characters had to make an effort to earn power instead of getting it easily, that as we have seen, "prodigies" totally encapsulate the opposite of that belief.

So I think that is why Atla does not consider Katara or Toph as prodigies (despite the fact that the fandom strives to give them that title, just to make them feel special, completely forgetting that their value does not lie in their ability to control an element) because both Katara and Toph had to fight their way to learn about their element and their value as a person, nothing was easy for them, and it was their need to look for options that led them to be great benders.

And I think that here I can also mention Zuko in which I firmly believe that if Ozai had not made his son feel like someone inferior to his sister, he would have been such a prodigy. like Azula (since throughout the series it is shown that when he had confidence in himself and a clear goal he grew enormously in firebending ability, in just a few months) But that would have also meant that he would have fully embraced the worldview that the Fire Nation had during the war, and that perhaps nothing would have made him change his mind, because, why would he change when he was not going through any lack and was a prodigious prince? However, that did not happen, and Zuko was considered someone worthless and was exiled from his home, which allowed him to open his mind to the real world and find tools to become one of the greatest firebending masters

To conclude this I will say that being a prodigy in the Avatar universe does not make the character inherently superior to others or impossible to achieve, it only indicates rather that that character may have the capacity for evil within him and / or has a mind that was forced to mature from a very early age, either by abuse or survival, but edo also means that they reach their full potential when they are children and can no longer grow beyond that

For me then an avatar power scale would be: beginners, advanced, and masters and the prodigies could only end up in the master box, because apart from completely mastering their control they are not invincible and they are not extremely special either, because the avatar canon itself does not treat them that way, even if they are villains

I do think Azula blames Zuko for being hurt, and this is both a way for her to make herself feel safer (because she's not weak like Zuko) and a way to avoid her own guilt in being complicit in Zuko's abuse. I mean, psychologically, it often does happen that way when abuse is happening in a household. Azula can't blame her father for hurting Zuko, so it must be Zuko's fault for "making" Ozai hurt him.

I'm confused by the part of your ask about how only evil characters are prodigies. The show is pretty explicit in its portrayal of Aang as a prodigy.

What I see as the show's stance on this is tied to the repeated theme of balance. Azula fell because she did not have balance in her life, and tried desperately to prove that she was already perfect. Aang struggled with understanding that not everyone likes a show-off, and being an airbending prodigy wasn't enough, he had to learn all four elements to become the hero he was meant to be. Zuko actually becomes more successful once he learns to embrace balance, too, even though he doesn't start out as a prodigy.

It's not the prodigy aspect that makes Azula a villain, it's believing she doesn't need to grow, regardless of how powerful or good she is at the start, that makes her a villain. The show gives us countless examples of characters who meet their own destruction because they refuse to learn from others and think only of themselves. Zhao is another example, Jhong Jhong's pupil who was consumed by his own fire.

The show's approach towards what a master is is based on martial arts, in which mastery is achieved through growth, discipline, control, and harmony. Not through raw power or natural talent, which can only take you so far if you have no respect for the world around you.

[flightlessfinch]

garden song by phoebe bridgers / the black brothers.

"the doctor put her hands over my liver she told me my resentment's getting smaller"

in the house of black, resentment and anger is a birthright. it's passed down from parent to child, and the only escape is estrangement. if you're disinherited, you cannot inherit your mother's rage.

this song makes me think of both of the black brothers, but especially sirius. being scapegoated for your entire life will build resentment toward the golden child whether you want the anger to be there or not. sirius loves his brother, but in childhood they were not only brothers, best friends, but rivals for their parents' love and affection. favouritism is toxic. it builds a rift between children. at ten, regulus learned that association with his own brother would sour his image in his parents' eyes. he lived in fear of becoming him. he'd been taught that he could only earn love with obedience and "goodness." sirius' abuse was a tool orion and walburga used to exert control over regulus. "if you're bad, if you're anything like your brother, this will be you. we won't love you anymore." when you are a child, losing your parents' love is the subject of nightmares.

their gentle treatment of regulus served as another tool of abuse toward sirius. "we care capable of being loving, patient, and gentle. just not to you, because you are wrong, and bad, and broken. you are a rotten child. if you were different, we would love you." they had completely different childhoods under the same roof.

children growing up in abusive households don't have a baseline for "normal." abuse is normal to them. they don't know it's abusive or bad until they are much older, and reflect on their experiences in childhood (if they even remember, which oftentimes they don't. trauma gets written over by the brain all the time). sirius likely thought he was evil, and bad, and broken when he was a kid. he was told he deserved it by his parents, and they're his parents, so he believed them. he loved his mother and father. he was hungry for their love in return, but he couldn't do anything right in their eyes.

the scapegoat cannot earn love with "goodness" or obedience. everything they do is wrong.

sirius grew up angry. he was taught his emotions weren't important, and he was punished for expressing himself, so his quiet childhood anger grew louder and louder. he was hungry for love, but he learned love was impossible for him to acquire, so he settled for attention. hatred can be a substitute for love. at least when he was hated he wasn't invisible.

"i grew up here 'til it all went up in flames except the notches in the door frame"

sirius and regulus had a complicated relationship that often toed the line between love and hatred, because every lesson they learned about love taught them that it is conditional and transactional. they loved each other but it was in a stormy, inconstant way. they fought like cats. the bond between brothers is vicious in a way a relationship with anyone else could never be. they were in each others first memories, they don't remember what it's like not to have a brother (until sirius learns, and realizes estrangement and death are more different than he imagined when he left. "you're dead to me" is one thing, death is quite another).

they are the only two people on earth who know what it was like to grow up in that house.

i don't think they ever apologized to each other for anything. they've said unforgivable things to each other over and over again, and didn't address a word of it once the anger faded, just like their parents. they were close when they were kids because sirius hadn't ruined himself in his parents' eyes yet. likely, before sirius was sorted into gryffindor he was his parents' favourite child because he was their heir.

regulus was more than likely an afterthought most of the time for the first ten years of his life. he isn't as charming, handsome, or outgoing as sirius, which probably resulted in negative comparisons. "why can't you be more like sirius? why are you so shy?" that sort of thing. he grew up hungry for love, and sirius grew up nourished by it because he was golden.

then, he revealed his "flaw" and his parents turned on him. this must have been terrifying. regulus, after being an afterthought for his entire life, was suddenly the favourite. despite sirius' suffering, regulus must have been quietly happy about this for a long time. children aren't as empathetic as adults are. they're also selfish, it's developmentally normal. regulus didn't understand why sirius couldn't just be "good" and stop making their parents angry. he didn't understand that no matter what sirius did, there would always be a fault in it.

to his parents sirius was a rotten, bad child. no matter how much you wash rotten fruit, it won't unripen. he was doomed. he probably tried to please them, especially when he was younger (first to fourth year, i'd say, before he learned that his childhood was not normal). he was clever, he probably brought home perfect marks with the hope that his parents would offer him a crumb of affection, and was left disappointed every single time. which resulted in more rebellion because if he was going to be bad in their eyes no matter what, why would he even try to make them happy?

regulus didn't have friends like james or remus to help him understand that his childhood was abusive. if you believe his friends were people like barty crouch jr and evan rosier, both of them probably had similar childhood experiences to regulus. the rosier family is also old, traditional pure-bloods. barty canonically has a horrible relationship with his dad, which his mother seemingly enabled if not normalized. she obviously loved barty a lot, but she also failed to protect him from his father's anger.

because he didn't understand how abusive his parents were to him as well as sirius, he probably blamed sirius for his own suffering. when he talked about it with his friends, barty and evan probably would have agreed with him. "they're nice to you, they'd be nice to him too if he wasn't such a shit-stirrer. he's doing it for attention." he was taught to hate his brother. his parents indirectly told him with their actions that sirius didn't deserve love, and as they grew older and grew apart, when sirius found unconditional love and acceptance outside of their family, regulus' resentment toward sirius turned into hatred.

regulus was a lonely child. he was shown over and over again that he could not be himself or he would not be loved by his family. he was taught that he couldn't be close with his own brother. as a subconscious form of self-preservation he likely distanced himself from sirius regardless, because if he knew him and loved him less it wouldn't hurt so much to inevitably see him be abused right in front of him. to survive, regulus made himself so small he hardly existed. he didn't interfere with his parents' punishments and harsh words for sirius because if he did, he would lose the only source of acceptance and love in his life.

sirius watched regulus watch him suffer and do nothing. he decided he was a coward, and he didn't love him enough to help him.

"i don't know when you got taller see our reflection in the water"

sirius waited until his sixth year to run away. i think if regulus wasn't in that house he would have ran away from home much sooner.

when you are the older sibling in an abusive household you feel a sense of responsibility to protect your younger sibling. you are automatically parentified. your parents are not to be trusted, so your little brother comes to you with the big, scary questions he has. you become independent and self-sufficient. you stand between your abusive parent and your brother because you don't want him to get hurt. you grow up fast because if you don't you'll suffer more, and your sibling will suffer more too.

sirius was taught that he deserved the hatred he experienced, and he knew if he left the hatred would have nowhere to go but his brother. the idea of leaving him alone there, and not knowing whether or not he was safe, whether or not his parents were in a rage, whether or not regulus had a question that needed answering that he couldn't bring to their parents, made sirius feel obligated to stay.

this brings us back to resentment.

regulus blamed sirius for their parents abuse. sirius blamed regulus for the abuse he experienced, because he was staying in that house for him, so every terrible thing he experienced, every harsh word, was for regulus. all of this, while regulus didn't believe they were being abused at all.

i imagine regulus wasn't grateful that sirius stayed. he probably thought he was stupid for not leaving whenever he had a chance. he probably said so every single time sirius went to him for comfort after something awful happened in that house. they had explosive fights about this, the kind of fights you can only have with your brother. this went on for two years, until something truly horrific happened and sirius had to go.

"i hopped the fence when i was 17 then i knew what i wanted"

even if you have to get out to survive, leaving an abuser is hard. sirius still loved his parents, and he loved his brother. he must have felt guilty for not being the son they wanted, despite his rage toward them. abusers are not abusive all the time. he likely has fond memories with both of his parents, as well as his brother. his mother's hands were gentle as often as they were harsh, and the emotional confusion that is created with that sort of inconsistency will result in guilt when a child thinks of their parent in a negative light.

regulus likely compounded this when they discussed it. "our parents aren't abusive. you're ungrateful. you want to be coddled. they're hard on us because they want us to be strong. you shouldn't speak that way about our mother. she says she does everything out of love for us, she's our mother, sirius, do you really think she's a monster?" sirius doesn't think she's a monster, he thinks she's cruel, and abusive, because his friends helped him to see her honestly.

in canon, when he discusses regulus' blood supremacist beliefs, sirius says: "...my idiot brother, soft enough to believe them..." (referring to their parents). i don't think that this mindset, for regulus, stopped at blood supremacy. regulus is always trapped in his parents' version of their childhood, and he is so emotionally invested in it that seeing his own childhood any other way is unthinkable to him. if his parents are abusive and unloving, and he has spent his whole life making himself small to appease them, how could he live with that reality? how could he bear it? it is a sunk-cost fallacy.

every punishment regulus was ever given, he was convinced he deserved. sirius knew it wasn't fair. they couldn't see eye to eye.

the night sirius left, i think regulus realized he was right about their parents. i think he thought they abused sirius, but not him. he realized that the way their parents treated sirius couldn't possibly be normal. i think he died believing his parents didn't abuse him. the guilt he must have felt about this is unfathomable. believing his brother was abused and for some reason he was not, when regulus was abused, is so painful.

regulus quietly resented sirius for leaving him behind. in his ugliest, most selfishly human moments he viewed it as a lack of love, not entirely self-preservation. his self-esteem was undoubtedly already terrible because of the nature of his parents inconsistent and conditional love, when sirius finally left regulus probably internalized his absence as proof that there is something fundamentally unlovable about him. they didn't speak after sirius left, even at school. if regulus spoke to sirius, he knew he might get in trouble for it. there must have been a sense of betrayal, no matter how justified sirius was for leaving. regulus doesn't seem like he would be able to handle guilt well. sirius represents a lot of unpleasant emotion for regulus. regulus represents a lot of unpleasant emotion for sirius. they probably both actively avoided each other.

it didn't help that there was another, external barrier rising between them.

they went to opposite sides of the war. regulus found community and acceptance among the death eaters. sirius found community and acceptance with the marauders and the order of the phoenix.

"no, i'm not afraid of hard work i get everything i want i have everything i wanted"

by his sixth year, regulus has everything he always wanted as a child. his parents' undivided attention and love. friends. power. it is bittersweet.

by his seventh year, sirius has everything he always wanted as a child. a home far away from his family. freedom. boundless love. it is bittersweet.

their differences are irreconcilable.

sirius heals the wound of his childhood and tries to build a life he is proud of, but it is impossible to escape the shadow of his family. they haunt him. he worries about his brother the same way he did when they were kids, but he knows he cannot stand up for him anymore. it was too much. he had to save himself. he knows the danger regulus is in, and the dark path he is walking down, but he can't help him because regulus doesn't want to be helped.

you can't save someone who doesn't want to be saved.

"everything's growing in our garden you don't have to know that it's haunted"