#we go there to party with the ancestors

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

ok having actually beaten the msq (up til endwalker anyway) i think im qualified to make an au now. anyway mystery as venat + wol vivi + shiromori as elidibus send post

[homunculus-argument]

I don't think fantasy writers play enough with the concept of the different fantasy races having distinct ethnicities. Like imagine a group of mixed peoples, where the dwarves are all roasting each other like dwarves do, and one of them remarks that when he first saw one of the other dwarves in the group, he mistook her for a man. The other dwarves in the group blink in surprise - the closest that dwarves will go to an audible gasp of shock - and she pulls out a knife and tries to stab him.

Once the dwarves have been separated from each other and the situation has calmed, one of the humans asks another dwarf what that incident was about. Naturally a human woman would have been insulted too, but dwarves are so jovial about insulting each other, why was this matter different?

And the dwarf who was asked explains that there are things you can brutally insult another dwarf about, and there are things you simply do not touch. The dwarf-woman in question is from a completely different region of The Great Underground as the others, and her people have different norms about what kind of patterns men and women braid into their beards. The dwarf insulting her wasn't only insulting her appearance, he was being racist.

The human is surprised to learn that dwarves have different peoples, and the dwarf looks at them like at an idiot. Of course they do, they even look completely different from each other. And the human listens as the dwarf lists off various distinguishing clothing details too nuanced for a human to notice, and then how dwarves coming from different corners of the world have different physical traits, according to what kind of conditions their local stone types dictate.

The human spots a connection and goes oh! We have that too, though ours are not about rock types and tunnel air, but the weather aboveground. Humans' facial features vary by how hot, cold, arid or windy their ancestors' homelands were, and our skin tone varies by how much the sun shines in their native region.

The dwarf frowns at the last part, going "I thought you people just paint your skin and dye your hair for fun", and the human admits that yeah, we do that too, but not all the time, and not the whole skin. The dwarf asks, what of that tall woman the colour of dravite, her palms and the soles of her feet were lighter than the rest of her. Does that mean she paints herself dark to be more beautiful?

The human says no, that just happens naturally. Maybe it's because one's palms and feet aren't exposed to the sun as much, so they are paler.

The dwarf nods, still unsure whether this is actually legit or just the human habit of lying for fun, and proceeds to ask about the wild northman of their party. He is as pale as an olm, but the palms of his hands and the soles of his feet are dark. Are they painted, or naturally that way?

No, the human answers. That guy just doesn't bathe.

[wonderjanga]

I’m Certainly Your Best Friend

Marvel: “You know, you look just like your great, great, great, great great great great 1000 times great grandpa.”

Aquaman: “I do?”

Marvel: “Yeah. The only difference is your mustache. He didn’t have one.”

Aquaman: “I’m sorry, but I’m pretty sure you’re saying that you knew my ancestor.”

Marvel: “I did.”

Aquaman: “…How?”

Marvel: “Well, I used to be a fisherman some many thousand years ago. I finished him out of the water after I electrocuted it.”

Aquaman: “You electrocuted the water?”

Marvel: “Yeah! I wanted to catch as much fish as possible! I accidentally made his heart stop.”

*silence*

Aquaman: “Did you kill my great grandpa?”

Marvel: “No! I restarted his heart, of course. That was actually how I learned that electricity could stop them. Anyways, after that, we became best friends.”

Billy didn’t realize that Aquaman took that ass “Wait, if my grandpa was his friend, and I like this guy, does that mean we’re genetically bound to be best friends?” So, they grew significantly closer and started doing a bunch of random shit together that they had a lot of fun doing. They were bros.

Now, apparently the JL hadn’t known of this blossoming broship until GL and Flash asked him a question.

Flash: “Cap! Who’s your best friend?”

GL: “It’s us, right?”

Marvel: “Uh…” *feels put on the spot and doesn’t want to upset either of them*

GL: “It’s totally us.”

Supes: “I might not be. I spent quite a lot of time with Cap.”

Flash: “We spend more time.”

Wondy: “What about your best female friends?”

Marvel: “You and Mary.”

Wondy: “Oh. Good.” *proud*

Flash: “Then we’re your favorite male ones!”

Marvel: “Uh… no.”

GL: “What was that?”

Marvel: *clears throat* “No.”

GL and Flash: *gasps*

Flash: “Wha— who is it then?”

Marvel: “…Aquaman.”

*silence*

GL: “What?”

Marvel: “It’s Aquaman.”

*more silence*

Flash: “Since when???”

Marvel: “I don’t know! A long time?”

GL: “How? We barely see you guys hang out.”

Marvel: “We do fun stuff together all the time. Outside of work. Like how last week after the alien invasion, we swam to Antarctica so we could hold a polar bear fighting tournament.”

Flash: “…huh???”

Supes: “Wait really?”

GL: “Dude! Why didn’t you invite us?”

Marvel: *shrugs*

GL: “Don’t just shrug!”

Supes: “Cap, what else have you done with Aquaman?”

Marvel: “A week ago we went down to Atlantis to party?”

GL and Flash: *more gasps*

Marvel: “And the week before that, we went to Brazil for all the Mardi Gras celebrations going on.”

GL and Flash: *even more gasps*

Marvel: “So… Yeah.”

[fushitoru]

chapter 2: the aftermath a bridgerton!au

pairing ⸺ duke!satoru gojo x fem!reader

summary ⸺ dearest gentle reader, a new season is upon us as the ton gets ready for a season filled with drama, heartbreak, and passion. after being crowned diamond of the season, heir to a dukedom mr. satoru gojo⸺only looking to marry just to secure his inheritance⸺has his sights set on you, the easiest (and most obvious) option. later, when you catch his saying unsavory things about you on a terrace when he least suspected it, you swear to never marry gojo. as london's fashionable set goes through yet another wedding season, will there be hope for scandalous gossip, hate, and thinly veiled insults, or will we witness blooming love and passion?

warnings ⸺ nsfw, enemies to lovers, bridgerton au, angst, fluff, eventual smut, jealousy, misogyny, regency era au, gojo being infuriating, reader also being infuriating, both of them are clueless honestly

chapter summary ⸺ after an eventful first ball after your debut, you continue the season with thinly veiled vexation towards gojo. but fate is not on your side; you and gojo keep encountering each other, matching fire with fire (7.8k)

a/n some parts of this chapter broke my brain to write but i kind of had fun! as always thank you to @/sinn-claire for beta reading :p i was going to say i'll try to have weekly updates but i don't want to jinx it lol

prev. the debutante | next. the manor

general masterlist | series masterlist

Dearest gentle reader, 

It appears that Her Majesty has bestowed the coveted title of this season’s Diamond upon none other than Miss Itadori, who has indeed lived up to her newfound acclaim as the incomparable of the year. At the latest ball, our shining Diamond was quite occupied, with suitors lining up in such numbers that one might have thought them to be queuing for the royal throne itself. Furthermore, blooms were budding between many of the debutantes and gentlemen, including…..

...Yet, one particular couple captivated the attention of all: none other than Mister Satoru Gojo and our season’s Diamond. After having kept his words sparse and his attentions limited to none, Mister Gojo appeared utterly taken with Miss Itadori, conversing with her intimately on the dance floor. It seems your humble Author was indeed correct⸺Mister Gojo has entered the marriage market. However, the exclusivity he has adopted may not deter the determined maidens he seeks to avoid, for the Ambitious Mamas will no doubt perceive his selectiveness as a challenge to be overcome. 

One cannot help but wonder if an announcement of particular interest will be made at the upcoming Gojo country house party. Although your Author has not yet laid eyes upon the guest list for the Duchess Gojo’s anticipated gathering, reliable sources suggest that nearly every eligible young lady of marriageable age will be journeying to Kent next week. The country house party is known to be a perilous affair. Married individuals often find themselves enjoying the company of someone other than their spouse, while the unwed frequently return to town betrothed with surprising haste.

Indeed, the most unexpected engagements often follow closely on the heels of such rustic diversions.

⸻ LADY WHISTLEDOWN’S SOCIETY PAPERS

Satoru had no intention of squandering his time this season⸺or at any time, for that matter.

The notion of love matches held little appeal to him, despite witnessing such a union firsthand in his own parents. Make no mistake, the Duke and Duchess Gojo enjoyed a happy marriage, and Satoru held both his father and mother in the highest regard. Yet, he was perfectly content on his own.

Being one of the strongest bachelors⸺both intellectually and physically⸺has been Satoru’s destiny. Ever since his ancestors had been blessed by the royal family with the dukedom, the Gojo family had made its goal to be the most powerful nobility and the closest to the royal family. (Which is still maintained in the status quo, because the Queen dotes on Satoru, inviting him for tea every fortnight. The Queen lavished him with overly sweet biscuits, and in return, Satoru provided her with the latest gossip from court). 

But this responsibility doesn’t get fulfilled without independence; one had to accept the solitary truth that to be truly great was to remain unswayed by the fleeting pleasures of the world⸺love included.

Satoru had little time or interest for the other vices that tempted men of his station, such as lust. Contrary to the whispers circulating among the ton, Satoru had never indulged in the life of a rake or frequented brothels as many of his acquaintances did. Really, the allegations were, in truth, merely just a byproduct of his appearance and demeanor; with a young man with the stature, face, and eligibility of Satoru, the public would immediately like to slap on the label of “rake” due to his arrogant personality. Moreover, any encounters he had witnessed between men and women⸺whether dropping his friends off at brothels in his carriage after an evening at the gentleman’s club or overhearing flirtations at parties⸺struck him as shallow and an utter waste of time, especially when he was already a week behind on the ledgers and other official matters his father had entrusted to him. (He did have one indulgence, however: a weakness for gluttony, with an array of sweet confections as his loyal companions during long, sleepless nights.)

Marriage was an even greater burden. The thought of being accountable for a wife, and eventually children, seemed like a daunting task to Satoru. With sleepless nights spent on covering just a fraction of the business his father must do as a duke, Satoru was tired. He was exhausted⸺exhausted from the weight of responsibility, from striving to meet his father’s expectations, from seeking the Queen’s approval, from worrying over what Whistledown might print about him, and from the gossip of the businessmen with whom the Gojo family dealt. 

And yet, despite this weariness, Satoru was gripped by an insatiable obsession with perfection, an obsession that only deepened his fatigue. He craved approval, power, and the flawless execution of his duties⸺desires that gnawed at him even as they threatened to consume him.

Which is exactly why he needed a perfect wife. A wife that was capable, could handle bothersome people⸺which he was steadily losing the patience to deal with⸺and a reliable companion. Someone that would reduce his stress, not add to it. 

Satoru had spent all day lurking in the shadows as best as he could; being the most eligible bachelor did mean that brothers and sisters were coming up to him, singing praises of their debutante in an effort to capture his interest. But Satoru knew all too well that the loudest families often had the most to compensate for.

As ladies in white paraded before the crowd, many buckling under the weight of judgment and attention, Satoru prowled like a jungle cat, staying hidden in the throng, biding his time, and waiting for the right moment to strike.

What he noticed first about you was your way of carrying yourself. Even Auntie⸺the Queen⸺who, after seeing countless of girls today, had been incredibly bored, dragged her eyes over you in slightly more interest than she did for others. The moment you stepped through those grand doors into the court, it was evident to everyone that your stride was that of someone who understood her role and position in life⸺a confidence that set you apart from the other debutantes. Satoru’s eyes raked over you, observing you as your chest rose slightly as you took a breath in. 

And then you smiled.

Satoru's eyes widened, just imperceptibly, as he watched your expression as you made your way to the Queen. He made sure to shake his expression off to a more nonchalant one as he watched your form walk. Lesser men than Satoru would die for your smile. Men, out of all traits a woman could possess, cherished a pretty visage the most. Yet, what your smile conveyed went beyond mere beauty; it embodied innocence and the qualities most esteemed in a demure bride (which Satoru knew was just all a show, but it was indeed indicative of your skill to put up appearances, hence deeming you a reliable companion).

The corner of the young man's mouth rose.  When the Queen declared you the diamond of the season, Satoru knew he had found his quarry.

When the ball came, Satoru acted similarly: observing from behind, staying in conversation with his friends and other noble men that did business with the Gojo family as he prowled the ballroom, waiting for the right moment to ask you for your hand. And then Naoya came in when you were finally alone, away from all the incompetent men that dared to think they had a chance to court you, and Satoru almost laughed snarkily at how easy it all was. 

Approaching you, saving you from Naoya⸺it was all a perfect construction of his. Dancing, he noticed your steps were carried out with a practiced perfection and grace, and your responses to his questions displayed a respectable level of intellect. He could tell your responses were practiced and simple, your constitution and demeanor a result of much effort into presenting yourself as best as you could. But what does it matter, when you do it so perfectly?

Maybe it was a bit naive of him, but you seemed to glow when conversing with him. It amused him, as he kept watching your pretty eyes as you kept smiling while he kept throwing difficult questions at you. It was all expected, however. Satoru knew he was blessed with the brilliant blue Gojo eyes and eccentric fair, white hair; he was the most eligible bachelor for not only wealth and power but reproductive capabilities and opportunities as well. Which lady wouldn’t want to be mother to his cute and beautiful blue-eyed babies?

After witnessing such mediocre men who paled in comparison to Satoru, surely you must be smitten. Gojo could see right through you: you, the diamond, have been looking for a man as meritorious as you, and you had found it in Satoru. 

So why were you acting this way?

When you wake up in the morning and get ready for suitors, it is as you expected; there are multiple carriages outside your doorstep, and there is a line from the drawing room, extending all the way down the stairs. When Choso stumbles into the drawing room, where you and your mother are enjoying tea, he is clearly unhappy at the selection of men waiting to be let in to call upon you. 

“This is absurd!” Choso’s hands raked over his hair in an effort to process the scene he had just witnessed. “Why do I see Naoya waiting outside?”

Your nose crinkled in distaste. “Well, dear brother, I certainly cannot control which suitors call upon me. He must’ve enjoyed our conversation yesterday. The enjoyment, however, is one sided.”

Choso’s eyes widened comically. “You had a conversation with him yesterday?” He then turned to your mother accusingly, who was reading a Whistledown while sipping on her tea innocuously. “This would not have happened if I was there, Mother. This is your fault.”

Your mother continued drinking her tea nonchalantly, waiting for a few beats to grace him with a response. “I prefer this, my son, to no visitors out there because our dear Lord Itadori scared all the bachelors away with his pickiness.” Then, her eyes flashed. “And don’t give me that tone.”

You snickered behind your palm as Choso visibly deflated.

 “Kuna! Get back here!”

Pitter patters of small paws started to get closer and closer, as heavy footsteps followed it. Yuji and the family corgi, Sukuna Jr., burst into the room. Eyeing the biscuit in your hand, Kuna made his way directly to you, panting at your feet. A pet given affectionately by your-not-so-affectionate older brother, Sukuna, when he left for his year long trip around Europe, Kuna was the cutest little puppy. You and Yuji loved to spoil him, clearly shown as Yuji patted him while breathing heavily. You cooed as Kuna licked your fingers while inhaling the biscuit you had presented him. 

“Well,” your mother stood up, having finished her tea, and began ushering in the maids to clear the table. “It seems our morning will be quite busy. You’d best be prepared for a long day, my dear.”

Choso was still grumbling as he took a seat across from you, his eyes narrowing at the sight of the long line of suitors outside. “I’m keeping an eye on that Naoya fellow. If he so much as looks at you the wrong way…”

You raised an eyebrow at your brother’s protectiveness, feeling both amused and touched. “Choso, I appreciate your concern, but I can handle myself. Besides, with Kuna here, I doubt any of these gentlemen will get too close without proper approval.”

As if understanding the conversation, Sukuna Jr. barked enthusiastically, his tail wagging as he looked up at you with bright, expectant eyes. You smiled and scratched behind his ears, watching as his tiny body wriggled with joy.

Yuji, still catching his breath from the chase, flopped onto the chair beside you, shooting a grin at Choso. “Come on, big brother, give her a break. It’s not every day our sister gets declared the diamond of the season. Let her enjoy it.”

Choso crossed his arms, still unconvinced. “I’m just saying, if any of these men don’t meet my standards⸺”

“Your standards?” you interrupted with a teasing lilt. “Choso, I’d never find a husband if I had to meet your impossible standards. Besides, you should be more concerned about finding someone yourself.”

Choso’s cheeks tinted with a slight blush, but make no mistake; he was hot with anger, ready to make a snarky retort. Your mother, who had been overseeing the maids, turned her attention back to the conversation with a soft smile.

“Your sister is right, Choso. It’s her time to shine, and as her family, we should support her, not make things more difficult.” She gave him a pointed look before turning to you with a gentler expression, and he backed down as he always does for your mother. “Now, my dear, are you ready to begin receiving your guests?”

You took a deep breath, nodding as you steeled yourself for the hours of polite conversation and careful navigation of the social battlefield ahead. “As ready as I’ll ever be.”

“Good,” your mother said, her voice laced with both pride and encouragement. “Remember, you are the diamond of the season. There isn’t a man out there who wouldn’t be lucky to have you.”

You offered a weak smile. “Let’s get this over with.”

As you walked toward the sofa where you would be talking with suitors, Kuna trotted alongside you, his presence a comforting reminder.With Yuji and Choso trailing behind, and your mother leading the way to open the door, you braced yourself for the onslaught of admirers waiting beyond the door.

But as you straighten your posture, in anticipation to greet the first suitor, you couldn't help but glance down at Kuna, who stared up at you with wide, curious eyes. You chuckled softly.

“Well, Kuna,” you whispered, “let’s see who passes your test today.”

Gojo’s gaze wandered down to Sukuna Jr. in your lap as you stroked his fur, and he gave you a saccharine⸺yet strained⸺smile. “Must this dog bear witness to our conversation? 

As if sensing Gojo’s unfriendliness, Kuna started growling, and you could feel the rumble deep in his stomach. You met Gojo’s sweet smile with one of your own. “Yes.”

Gojo blinked, and the smile on his face faltered. You noticed that this was one of the first time Gojo’s ever expressed an emotion outside of smugness, and you count this as your personal win.

“Well,” he hesitated, and then a smile was on his face as if that stumble didn’t happen. “You look wonderful this morning, Miss Itadori.”

Your eyes flashed at his audacity to talk behind your back and try to fool you with flattery. “On the contrary, I think I look rather simple.”

Gojo, none the wiser as to what you were referring to, waved his hands. “Nonsense.”

Before you could respond, Kuna let out a low, rumbling growl, his sharp eyes fixed on Gojo. The sound was subtle, but in the quiet of the morning, it was unmistakable. Gojo’s gaze flickered down to the small dog, and his smile tightened ever so slightly.

You gently scratched behind Kuna’s ears, calming him, though his gaze never left Gojo. “I apologize on behalf of my dear Kuna,” you said, your voice light but nonetheless pointed. “He tends to be wary of many, particularly those he believes to be with ulterior motives.”

Gojo nodded, unfazed, and looked down at the dog in question. Upon eye contact, all your efforts to calm Kuna went to naught as the dog stood up, tense and teeth almost bared fully, to stare back at Gojo defiantly. Gojo, to his credit, was starting to be a little wary and was giving the pup an impassive stare. 

“You know, I have an affinity for dogs. There are many pups that I have spent my entire childhood with.” He offered a chuckle and moved his hand to pet Kuna. “Dogs do have a way of sensing things, don’t they?” That was clearly the wrong decision because the dog’s growl grew louder, and suddenly, he snapped at Gojo’s hand. Before Kuna could sink his teeth into Gojo’s hand, however, Gojo smoothly withdrew it out of his reach. 

“Protective, isn’t he?” Gojo laughed, but his stare towards Kuna was veering more and more into a glare. He tried to disguise his irritation by suavely adding, “Admirable. I’m glad he has protected my lady so well.” Gojo then grabbed your hand to give you a small kiss on the back of it while keeping eye contact. You had to divert your eyes elsewhere to avoid coloring your cheeks; while you knew this was just another one of Gojo’s pretenses to charm you, you were still fazed by it. 

You cleared your throat and tried to uphold the conversation. After all, it would be outright rude to keep throwing thinly veiled insults his way when there were others in your company; he also had the potential to spread further malicious rumors about you if you showed attitude. You mustered up a fake smile, and offered, “He was a gift to me and Yuji offered by my older brother, Sukuna, when he went traveling,” you offered. 

“Is that the brother you hoped to follow to Europe?”

You blinked and faltered. You didn’t expect him to remember that tidbit from your conversation at the ball last night. While most of the preferences you had asserted were artificial⸺supplemented to you by your tutor, who had drilled what fake preferences of yours would woo men⸺you truly did gain enthusiasm for the languages because you hoped to prove your helpfulness to Sukuna in an effort to run away from your inevitable debut. At the time, you were rebelling against anything your mama said, avoiding anything  associated with being paraded around like an animal, put on display for men. “Yes,” you said slowly, “Yes, it is.” 

Gojo smiled, this time a little more genuine at the fact it was his first time receiving an authentic response from you this morning, rather than something covered with a fake smile. Just as he leaned in slightly, probably preparing to make another smooth remark, Kuna, who had been shifting in your lap, suddenly stilled, his face buried in your lap and tail facing Gojo. For a moment, you thought he might be settling down.

And then it happened.

The largest fart ripped through the room out of Kuna’s arse, which was pointed directly in Gojo’s face. While you were not a scholar studying physics, you were aware that the air dynamics did not do Gojo any favors in preventing the smell from hitting him direct-on. Gojo’s eyes widened in surprise, and his suave expression faltered entirely as the smell quickly followed, filling the air around you both.

You could feel the heat rushing to your face in your effort not to laugh out loud. Trying to keep your composure, you gently patted Kuna’s belly, who was now face up, tongue lolling out in bliss. “Oh, dear,” you muttered, your voice strained with the effort to suppress a laugh.

Gojo, for once, was at a loss for words. His eyes were tearing up, probably at the smell; whenever you and Yuji spoiled Kuna with those biscuits, he dropped nasty-smelling dungs, and you knew Gojo wasn’t spared at all. The arrogant bachelor, who always seemed to have a witty response ready, was now at a loss of words as he weakly gazed upon the weak little poot! poot!s that escaped Kuna as you continued patting his stomach in an effort to relieve your pup’s digestive system.

At Gojo’s expression, you had to take quiet, deep breaths in an effort to rein in the cackles that were threatening to overcome you. You resorted to covering your mouth as you strained, “As you can see, my Kuna is quite expressive, and he seemed quite eager to show you that.”

He offered you a strained smile. “He does indeed generate quite a bit of wind.” At that, you could no longer hold back. Genuine laughter wracked through your figure, hurting your ribs as you tried to quell it with a hand to the mouth, but no avail. Your muffled laughter was still loud, and when the giggles subsided, you wiped your tears and threw an apologetic look at Gojo, preparing to express your regret. 

But you stopped at the sheer wonder he contained in his face as his gaze fixated on your lips, which were drawn back in the ghost of the smile you had while laughing riotously. Without allowing you much time to dwell on it, he stood up and dipped his head in a little bow. “Well, I have been taking quite a bit of your time, Miss Itadori. I better let other suitors have their chance.” He kissed the back of your hand. “I hope to see you at the horse race tomorrow.”

“Likewise.” You couldn’t help but spy some red coloring Gojo’s alabaster cheeks as he made his way to the exit. As you greeted the next suitor, the imprint of a certain man’s lips continued to tingle on your hands. 

“I told you he was a rake,” Nobara muttered as she scrubbed your arm with an intensity that matched her outrage. After hearing what Gojo had said about you, she was livid. Unfortunately, your skin was bearing the brunt of her frustration.

“Well,” you mused, trying to distract her, “what rumors have you heard that make you think that?”

“Momo told me a few months ago⸺” Nobara paused, her hands hovering over the various bottles on the counter. “Which scent would you prefer for your hair?”

“Sandalwood,” you replied.

Nobara nodded and poured some of the rich liquid into her hands before massaging it into your scalp. You closed your eyes, feeling the tension from the day's exhausting and dull conversations slowly melt away under her skillful fingers. “Momo mentioned that he’s often out late at night, which seems suspicious. But now that I think about it, Momo isn’t the most reliable source,” Nobara added, her tone shifting to one of skepticism.

You quirked an eyebrow. “Why do you say that?”

“There’s talk that she attempted to lure another maid’s husband into an affair,” Nobara replied, her hands now working the shampoo through your hair with a practiced ease. “She even tried to gain access to his quarters.”

You gasped. “How scandalous!”

“I know,” Nobara said, her hands now massaging the back of your neck with a gentler touch. “So, who knows how much truth there is to her gossip. But still, Gojo’s behavior is less than honorable, don’t you think?”

You sighed, gazing up at the ceiling with a mix of frustration and resignation. “He was gossiping about me with other men, calling me all sorts of horrible things⸺‘simple,’ of all things. And yet, he has the audacity to want to call upon me?”

“You know,” Nobara mused as she continued her task, “He sounds the exact opposite of what some of your books would imply.”

You hummed in agreement, recalling the radical works you kept hidden beneath your bed. Your mother would be appalled if she ever discovered them, but you often sought solace in political writings that challenged the rigid expectations of society. “I know. And that is precisely why I have no intention of encouraging his attention this season—at least, not before I ensure his complete and utter humiliation.”

“But do take care. His connections to the Queen are quite strong.”

You drew back from Nobara's hands, much to her chagrin. She gave you a glare while you exclaimed, "What?"

“Surely you’re aware that the Gojo dukedom is among the closest to the royal family?”

You fervently hoped your mother hadn’t caught wind of Gojo's status. Yet, the way she had been observing you⸺subtly scrutinizing you in the drawing room while feigning interest in a suitor awaiting his turn⸺suggested otherwise. She had certainly noticed Gojo's growing interest, and the thought of her getting involved, fixating on a match with him, filled you with dread. Drawing your hands over your face, you moaned, the very notion of her scheming to pair you with Gojo weighing heavily on your mind.

“But that should hardly be a concern if you’ve begun to distance yourself from him, correct? You have been creating some distance, haven’t you?”

Your silence spoke volumes, and Nobara, ever quick to discern your hesitation, gasped in exasperation. “You cannot seriously be considering giving this gentleman any encouragement, can you?”

"No, no, it’s not that,” you replied, massaging your temples in frustration. “It’s just that my mother is probably ecstatic at the prospect of securing a match between me and Gojo.”

“But surely, if she knew the things he’s been saying behind your back, she would understand.”

You tried to open your mouth to respond, but it felt as if your throat had closed up. Would she really? A match with Gojo would mean elevated status for the Itadori family⸺a duchess for a daughter. What worth is there in being the diamond of the season if not to secure the most advantageous match? The very thought made your chest tighten with the suffocating realization that your mother might very well advocate for the union, despite Gojo’s duplicity.

“I⸺” you swallowed. “I’m not sure.” Before Nobara could interrupt, you stood up and reached for your robe. 

Nobara's brow furrowed as she watched you stand up. "Where do you think you're going? You’re not done with your bath, and your hair is still full of suds!" She reached out to stop you, her hands hovering as though unsure whether to pull you back into the tub or grab the robe you were now clutching.

You forced a small, tired smile, grateful for the distraction. “I need just a moment. The water's gone cold, anyway.”

“Oh, nonsense! You’ll catch a chill if you get out now. Sit back down,” Nobara insisted, her protest tinged with genuine concern. She placed a firm hand on your shoulder, guiding you back toward the warm water.

With a reluctant sigh, you allowed yourself to be coaxed back into the tub. The momentary reprieve from the conversation was a relief, and you welcomed Nobara’s determined focus on completing your bath. She picked up a sponge, her earlier frustration melting into concentration as she scrubbed your back.

“Well, we can discuss that scheming rake later,” she muttered, more to herself than to you. “For now, let’s get you properly cleaned up before your mother comes looking for you. She’d never forgive me if I let you appear anything less than perfect.”

You nodded with a lump in your throat, grateful for the change in topic, even if only temporary. The soothing rhythm of Nobara's hands working through your hair, the warmth of the bathwater, and the familiar, comforting routine helped ease the tightness in your chest. For now, the troubling thoughts of Gojo and your mother's ambitions could be set aside.

“Now, hold still,” Nobara said, her tone softening as she rinsed the last of the soap from your hair. “We’ll have you looking radiant again in no time.”

The conversation was left unfinished, hanging in the air like a question that neither of you was quite ready to answer. But for now, the silence was a welcome refuge.

"Do you have any notion of how impossible it is to charm a lady when there is a pup expelling such foul air right beneath your nose?" Satoru lamented, leaning back in his chair and raking a hand through his tousled hair. The trio gathered at the table presented a rather unusual sight: Satoru, visibly discomposed; Nanami, calmly sipping his drink as ever; and Suguru, nearly doubled over in laughter at his friend’s misfortune.

“Would you please⸺SMACK⸺cease your laughing?!” Satoru glared at Suguru, who seemed to be of no hope, now with tears in his eyes as he clutched his stomach and the back of his head, which Satoru had just hit. 

“Truly, your vanity⸺haaah⸺your vanity was in need of humbling,” Suguru managed between breaths, still snickering behind his palms. 

Satoru glowered, crossing his arms and staring daggers into his drink, as if his gaze alone could break the fine glass. “My pride had already suffered enough. She was positively frigid.”

Nanami hummed. “Perhaps she’s merely discerned your true nature.”

“It defies comprehension,” Gojo groaned, ignoring Kento’s statement. “What kind of lady disparages her own beauty as ‘simple’? I cannot fathom what has caused her such vexation. Only the night before, she was utterly taken with me!”

Suguru⸺who had now calmed down⸺was in the midst of wiping his tears when he suddenly stopped. “You don’t suppose it had anything to do with your careless words, do you?”

Kento eyed the pair in front of him with an accusatory side eye. “And what precisely did you say?”

 “Satoru, in his usual fashion, could not contain his tongue. Out on the terrace, with the garden as witness, he spoke rather unkindly, referring to the diamond as ‘simple and dull.’”

“Nonsense,” Satoru waved his hands, dismissing the idea. “The lady would never wander the gardens at such an hour in the night unchaperoned.”

“I suggest you reconsider.” Kento gave him a stern look and continued, “I happened upon her last night, emerging from the gardens, and she appeared rather disheveled.” 

This revelation gave Satoru pause, but if there was one thing certain about Satoru Gojo, it was this: his arrogance was such that he could scarcely fathom anyone, least of all a lady, finding his charm anything but irresistible⸺even if that very lady had overheard him uttering defamatory remarks about her. And this lady was one he could not let go of, unless he wanted to wave good-bye to his future.

“I am confident all will be well,” Gojo exhaled, his lips curving into a Cheshire smile. “Even if she did overhear, surely a few well-chosen sweet words will surely set matters right.”

(He was most grievously mistaken.)

“How many of those biscuits do you suppose we could finish?” Yuji was eyeing the biscuits from his seat next to you in the pavilion where you and your family were sitting. Out promenading with the other families of the ton, it was a scenic and beautiful day for you to mingle with even more suitors. The joy!

“Certainly less than me,” you remarked, sipping on your tea smugly. By the irritated pout on his face, you knew you were successful at getting a rise out of your younger brother. Knowing your mother wasn’t in sight, you quickly darted for the jam-filled biscuits, and your brother quickly followed in tow; soon, you were both stuffing your faces silly with the sugary treats.

“You two are incorrigible,” Choso scrunched his nose from where he sat across from you, arms crossed. “There’s no need to inhale those biscuits. What if someone sees?”

Yuji stuck out his tongue⸺now adorned with biscuit crumbs⸺and continued gorging, while you snickered at your younger brother’s pettiness.

“Miss Itadori.”

You began coughing wildly, caught off guard, and hastily straightened your posture to greet your guest. You turned to see Lord Ino, who offered you a slight nod before acknowledging your brothers. “Lord Itadori. Mister Itadori.”

“Lord Ino, nice to meet you on such a fine day.” You try to put a smile on your face as best as you can, even though you were caught off guard. “How do you find today’s weather?” 

Takuma grabs the back of your hand to kiss it. “I find it wonderful for the prospect of promenading. Do you care to do so with me?”

“Of course,” You stand up and link your elbows with Takuma’s.

“We’ll be thirty paces behind you, sister.” You both turned to look at Choso, who was giving Lord Ino his inevitable protective glare. Given Ino’s acceptable station, Choso hadn’t immediately protested, unlike the many suitors he had chased out of your manor the day before. He grabbed Yuji by the elbow, who, with cheeks comically inflated like a chipmunk hoarding acorns, was promptly dragged away. “Yuji, get up.” The last you saw of your brothers was Yuji’s futile protests, his mouth too full to be coherent⸺inevitably sending some crumbs flying onto Choso⸺and Choso swatting him for it.

As you began your walk with Lord Ino, the conversation naturally turned to the upcoming horse race. “Are you looking forward to the race this afternoon?” you asked, trying to keep the conversation light.

“I am,” the lord replied. “And you?”

“Very much so,” you said, a hint of excitement in your voice. “I have a feeling that the less popular horse⸺Blaze, was it?⸺might surprise everyone. The conditions seem just right for an underdog victory; the track is soft and warm, which would favor Blaze’s build.”

Lord Ino glanced at you with a polite but unconvinced smile. “But Thunder has higher odds and more bets. It’s as simple as that.”

You couldn’t help but bristle at the word “simple,” a word that had recently come to grate on your nerves. You pressed on, though, determined to keep the conversation pleasant. “I suppose there’s some truth to that, but sometimes there’s more to a race than just the odds and popularity.”

Ino chuckled softly. “Well, a good mentor and friend of mine⸺Duke Nanami⸺agrees with the odds, and His Grace is someone I deeply respect. I tend to follow his lead⸺the duke has a way of teaching lessons without hindering one’s growth.”

Before you could respond, the sound of a trumpet blared in the distance, signaling the start of the race. You looked at him, giving him a courteous nod, gesturing in the general direction Choso and Yuji were supposed to be in. “It seems the race is about to begin. I must rejoin my family.”

You curtsied as he bowed, and you watched as he walked away, leaving you momentarily alone. You took a deep breath, trying to dispel the lingering irritation from the conversation. Just as you began looking for your family, you felt a presence approaching.

You turned to find Lady Mei Mei and her entourage closing in. Their expressions were a study in artful contempt, laced with curiosity and barely concealed amusement. The atmosphere between you was thick with unspoken competition, each woman silently gauging the other’s position on the social ladder. 

“Miss Itadori, what a nice surprise!” Lady Mei Mei remarked, her tone dripping with false sweetness. “It appears you are alone and unchaperoned in a garden yet again! At least, according to what the rumors say. Was it part of yet another one of your charming ploys to get what you want?"

You met her gaze with cool composure, not giving her the satisfaction of a visible reaction. "I have no clue what you're talking about."

Lady Mei Mei tilted her head slightly, her eyes narrowing as if appraising a particularly interesting specimen. "Really?" she mused, drawing out the word as though savoring it. "It’s just that Lord Gojo hasn’t spoken with you all day. Even if Whistledown commended you in the last issue, I wouldn’t expect his interest to linger." The two ladies flanking her⸺unremarkable save for their sycophantic attachment to Mei Mei⸺giggled behind their fans, as though she had delivered a crushing blow.

You allowed yourself a small, almost imperceptible smile, one that didn’t reach your eyes. "So I’m assuming he called upon you?" you questioned sweetly, your voice laced with feigned politeness.

For a fleeting moment, Lady Mei Mei’s carefully curated composure slipped, the faintest flicker of irritation crossing her face before she regained control. She leaned in slightly, her voice lowering to a conspiratorial whisper meant for you alone. “None of the suitors will be interested in you any longer. The Queen may have mistakenly proclaimed you the diamond, but a pretty face, empty smiles, and hollow words can only last so long.”

“Whatever would be most convenient for you to believe.” Her words were empty and her threats dull, but you couldn’t help but let it compound on the irritation you had experienced today. But you knew better than to let your tongue loose; you were quite impulsive when you had started, and you didn’t want to start any scandal anytime soon. Instead, you held your ground, trying to maintain your composure (outwardly, at least) as Lady Mei Mei and her entourage turned to leave, their laughter echoing in your ears. 

You tried to implement a few things your tutor had ingrained in you: taking deep breaths and setting your posture correctly. However, as you stood there, collecting yourself, the last thing you needed seemed to manifest before you: Satoru Gojo.

His tall figure approached you with that familiar, self-assured stride, his eyes glinting with mischief. "Ah, Miss Itadori," he greeted, a sly smile playing on his lips. You were already irritated, and it took all your will-power to stifle a groan. 

"I couldn’t help but notice you were conversing with Lord Ino," he remarked casually.

Give him a smile. "Indeed, we were enjoying a promenade. It is, after all, what young ladies and their suitors are expected to do."

“Quite the choice in company!”

KEEP up the smile.  "He is a nobleman, and I am of noble descent. I fail to see your point, Mr. Gojo." 

Gojo’s smile was quick and cutting. “Oh, I’ve no particular quarrel with Lord Ino. It’s simply that he’s hardly the sort I’d expect to see on your arm. After all, he’s practically Nanami’s lapdog.”

You felt the familiar irritation rising within you⸺and you were fighting for your life trying to keep a smile on your face⸺but you kept your tone measured. "And what, pray tell, are you implying by that, Mr. Gojo?"

"It’s quite simple, really⸺" 

But your patience, already worn thin, snapped at that word.

"My good sir, do you not think it rather dishonorable to speak ill of others behind their backs?" Gojo began to respond, but you cut him off. "It’s curious how quickly opinions can change, is it not? Just the other evening, you seemed to hold me in rather low regard. Tell me, do you often dismiss people as ‘simple’ when they fail to meet any of the lofty expectations you have set? Or do you perhaps truly believe yourself to be at a station higher than others?"

Gojo stiffened, the smile slipping from his face as your words hit their mark. Before he could respond, Choso appeared at your side, his protective presence a welcome relief.

“Is there any problem, sister?” Choso asked, his tone polite yet firm as he glanced at Satoru, his eyes narrowing slightly.

Gojo’s gaze flicked to Choso, his irritation clear as he opened his mouth to make a cutting remark, and you couldn’t thank the gods enough for Choso’s mother hen tendencies. But the words faltered when he recognized who had interrupted. For a brief moment, surprise flashed in his eyes before he masked it with a tight-lipped smile.

You seized the moment, turning to Satoru with a sweet smile. “I think our time is up, Mister Gojo,” you said, your voice laced with venom.

Satoru hesitated for just a fraction of a second before nodding curtly, his expression unreadable. “Of course. Until next time, Miss Itadori.”

With that, he stepped back, allowing you and Choso to walk away toward where people were gathering for the race. As you moved through the crowd, you could feel Satoru’s gaze lingering on you, but you didn’t look back.

“That horse appears rather stout, does it not?” Yuji squinted against the blazing sun as he observed the horses from his seat beside you in the grandstand. “Why has it garnered so many bets?”

Choso, seated protectively on your other side, kept a steady arm linked with yours. His presence was reassuring, though your irritation was directed at the figure seated just below you. Satoru Gojo, to your endless chagrin, was sitting with Lady Mei Mei, who had all but forced her way into the seat beside him. Though he tried to appear indifferent, his signature flirty remarks flowing with ease, you noticed the subtle signs of irritation crossing his face. Whether it stemmed from Lady Mei Mei's advances or from your earlier exchange, you couldn't be sure. You refused to meet his gaze, though you could feel his eyes on you intermittently as the crowd waited for the race to begin.

“Men can be quite foolish at times,” you remarked hotly, your voice carrying just enough to be overheard. “Some people value the superficial and materialistic over true substance, much like they do with horses. Blaze, for instance, has the qualities that truly matter.”

You could almost feel Gojo’s gaze intensify, and despite yourself, you glanced in his direction. Lady Mei Mei, ever the actress, feigned a stumble, exclaiming with a coy smile, “These crowds are rather rough on a lady!”

You scoffed inwardly at her transparent attempt to press her bosom against Gojo’s arm.

“Oh my,” Gojo drawled, his voice oozing concern. “We can’t have that, can we?” Ever the gallant gentleman, he interlaced his arm with hers. “Here, for extra protection. I wouldn’t want a pretty lady shedding tears beside me.”

Mei Mei’s smirk was as satisfied as a serpent after a meal, and she batted her eyelashes coquettishly. “If I were to cry, would you console me?”

“Of course,” Gojo replied smoothly. “Though I might find myself crying should my horse lose. The bets I’ve placed are rather substantial.”

A flirtatious giggle escaped Mei Mei’s lips. “Then I shall cheer with all my might, so you needn’t suffer any losses, my lord.”

You were perilously close to tearing your hair out.

“I appreciate your enthusiasm, my lady,” Gojo said, taking her hand and kissing the back of it with exaggerated flourish. “But rest assured, I am quite confident of a victory today. Thunder is swift and cunning, far superior to that... other horse. It’s simple, really—Thunder will win.”

Your composure cracked. “Yuji,” you called, your voice sharp. Your brother, who had been lost in thought, snapped to attention. “Despite the other horse’s popularity, Blaze possesses the one quality universal to all champions: speed and diligence. The track conditions are in its favor.”

Yuji, caught off guard, blinked in confusion. “Yes, of course, sister,” he mumbled, clearly unsure of why you were addressing him.

“And anyone who thinks otherwise,” you continued, raising your voice slightly, “is bound to lose their money. Sorely and simply.”

Gojo matched your tone, his voice ringing out. “But of course, it’s all in good fun. There’s no need for hostility over a sport, is there? Both horses are fine contenders, though I remain convinced Thunder shall emerge victorious.”

Mei Mei tittered, parroting his sentiments, but you could hardly see straight for the anger coursing through you. Unable to hold back, you retorted, “However, it is, after all, still a race. And Blaze will win.”

By now, your exchange had drawn the attention of those around you, including your brothers. Choso and Yuji exchanged puzzled glances before Yuji asked weakly, “Are you still talking to us, sister?” Meanwhile, Choso’s protective instincts flared, his gaze darting suspiciously between you and Gojo.

Before you could reply, the horses lined up at the starting gate, and the crowd collectively rose to their feet, including Gojo. “Steady now, Thunder!” he called out, his voice brimming with confidence.

Not to be outdone, you shouted, “Come on, Blaze!”

The bell rang, and the horses surged forward, the crowd erupting in cheers. Blaze and Thunder quickly pulled ahead, the two horses locked in a fierce battle for the lead. Thunder was currently ahead, its sleek form cutting through the track with precision.

“Steady, Thunder! Keep the lead!” Gojo’s voice was full of excitement, urging his horse onward.

Your heart raced with frustration as Blaze lagged slightly behind. “You can do this, Blaze!” you urged, your voice rising above the din. Without thinking, you began whistling sharply, drawing alarmed looks from your brothers. The stares from the crowd meant nothing to you as you focused solely on the race.

Blaze, as if responding to your encouragement, began to accelerate, its powerful strides eating up the ground between it and Thunder. You noticed Thunder’s pace faltering, fatigue setting in, while Blaze surged ahead, pulling into the lead with a quarter of the race remaining.

Now it was Gojo’s turn to whistle, his voice tinged with desperation. “Straight to the finish line, Thunder! Don’t let up!”

But Blaze only widened the gap, its momentum carrying it farther ahead. You couldn’t contain your laughter, a joyous sound that bubbled up from within as Blaze crossed the finish line first, with Thunder trailing behind.

“Goddamn it,” Gojo cursed under his breath, his frustration palpable. You clapped your hands in delight, your laughter ringing out.

With deliberate grace, you placed your hands on your hips and turned to Gojo, flashing him a triumphant smile. “I’m so glad the ‘simple’ horse won,” you said, your voice dripping with satisfaction. “It seems I’ve finally bested a duke.”

Gojo’s blue eyes bore into you, their intensity searing, but you met his glare with a boisterous laugh, savoring the victory as the crowd’s cheers and claps echoed around you. Until it was only the two of you, staring each other down.

Gojo ⸺ 0, you ⸺ 1.

Now, Duchess Gojo had always had a penchant for gossip, no one escaping her eye and observation. Of course, it was now the Whistledown era, for the unknown author could observe far more than the high-profile duchess, who was the receiver of much praise and attention due to her son’s eligibility. But this eligibility had only been achieved because of her ability to direct the tide based on her reconnaissance, and in all her years, no could match her sass and direction. Except one. 

"You know, Lady Itadori," the Duchess remarked, her tone laced with feigned pensiveness, "the Gojo manor in the countryside has been dreadfully quiet, and, if I may say, it has been quite some time since we last enjoyed a proper tête-à-tête.”

The two ladies stood together near the stands, choosing a more secluded spot from which to observe the horse race. Lady Itadori, her closest confidante, met the Duchess’s gaze with a gleam in her eye. "Indeed, I must agree."

For a moment, the two women stood in silence, their eyes surveying the scene before them. From the ladies flirting shamelessly to the gentlemen scrambling for the favor of the season’s debutantes, they were like spectators at a grand circus. Yet, their attention was drawn to a particular act.

Raising her fan to her lips, Lady Itadori whispered conspiratorially to the Duchess, "I might add, my diamond has been spending a considerable amount of time in your son’s company."

The Duchess met her friend’s eyes and laughed lightly. "How many days do you wager it will take in the manor?"

Lady Itadori, now fully smirking, gave a delicate shrug. "It took you and the Duke but four days."

prev. the debutante | next. the manor

general masterlist | series masterlist

a/n: reader is hearing boss music rn

forced proximity whatttt

gojo when kuna ripped one in his face

comment, reblog, and send in an ask to let me know ur thots :3 memes are also appreciated <3

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[bigbad-tardis]

I don’t normally do meta analysis on tumblr of Doctor Who episodes but I’ve seen people so far reducing Dot and Bubble as a critique of Gen Z and the obsession with social media and “no one wants to work these days!” When I took away a different interpretation of the episode.

Dot and Bubble is about a group of rich white settlers. They’re so rich that to them two hours of work is too much and by their own admission they spend all their time partying otherwise. But I think it’s that scene at the end that really cemented my interpretations of the episode. The other member of the survivors is like “we can live like our ancestors and tame the wilderness.”

They’re trying to capture the magic of the good old days when they aren’t equipped to handle it, but not because of social media, but because they’re so out of touch with reality due to their rich backgrounds! *Lindy gets Ricky September killed and then tells people a lie in order to save her own skin, but also ends up with an ownership over his memory. She tells everyone that she couldn’t stop Ricky from going back to save more people but her tone reminds me a lot of the people on rich reality shows. “He was so brave.”

Idk where else I’m going with this but just something I noticed and thought was interesting about the episode.

*Edit addition: the reason I brought that up was because it’s the kind of ownership over something that isn’t theirs that is only really found by rich people. See Kim Kardashian wearing Marilyn Monroe’s dress.

[cheshitora]

warning: oral (f!receiving), afab!reader, fingering, mentions of toy usage, kaiser likes to torture your clit. need i say more? not proofread/edited

based off of this bedtime thought lol

kaiser will never give you the satisfaction of a quick fuck. no, he doesn’t believe in quickies.

kaiser loves to take his time with you. dare i say he loves to torture you. he’s not subtle at all with the way he desires you. subtlety is not his strong suit. he loves hard in worst way and it reflects on your sex life as well.

he NEEDS to take his time tormenting your cunt. so if you’re asking, or worse, begging, for him to eat you out, don’t expect him to finish his task in 10 minutes.

the room fills with the sound of squelching as he plunges two of his long digits in and out of your gummy cunt, your pussy sucking his fingers back in greedily as his tongue flicks at your sensitive bud with teasingly short flicks. soon, you shudder, another orgasm ripping through as your sweet juices coat his tongue and fingers, pulling them to suck on them like a candy treat.

nothing turns kaiser on more than the twisted expression on your face when you reach your 4th or 5th orgasm for the night. or at least, you think that’s how many times you’ve cum already. you lost track the second kaiser attached his mouth to your glistening folds. and just when you thought you'd had enough, you witness kaiser whipping out his favorite vibrator to abuse your clit with, as if it wasn't swollen enough already.

shock waves ripple through your body everytime he presses the toy harder against your sensitive bundle of nerves, that devilish grin plastered on his face when he sees tears pooling on your lower lid. does he wipe your tears away? if he's in a good mood, yes.

and right now, he's feeling generous. kaiser hates to see you cry on a regular day. but when you're tearing up from the painful sensation of overstimulation, then he's over the moon. because you're crying from the pain and pleasure he's bringing to you.

he gaslights you into thinking it's your fault for bringing this upon yourself, and it just might be.

after all, the two of you had dinner plans for the evening, but as you watched your handsome boyfriend dress himself for your date, you couldn't help but become flustered and anxious to pull his clothes back off his body. kaiser easily sensed your sudden change in demeanor as you watched him from your seat in the bed. he knew that look in your eye and he was just about ready to give you that satisfaction... until you asked him for a quickie.

the dumbfounded look on his face was one you'd never seen before until it morphed into one of offense. it looked as if you had just insulted him and his ancestors. a quickie? no. kaiser wasn't going to succumb to a quick 5-10 minute fuck, however long it would take him to spill inside you.

instead, you were subjected to clit torture. hours and hours of torment to your most sensitive region. you don't even know how much time has actually passed since he nearly ripped your expensive dress off your body and threw you onto the bed. you vaguely even remember kaiser stopping after your second orgasm to call the restaurant and cancel your special reservation, your mind fuzzy and and vision blurred with unshed tears.

"see what you do, schatz? we could've been having dinner together by now. guess i'm the only one eating tonight though."

moral of the story? if you value your clit, don't ask kaiser for a quickie. if you do, then cancel any plans you have for the day. dinner reservations? cancelled. party you’re invited to? declined. dentist appointment? rescheduled. hotel? trivago.

[ihavetoomanyocsdealwithit]

You break down into tears and tell them: "It’s been so long since I’ve felt this happy, I think I just got overwhelmed. You make me happy.” 

Heartslabyul dorm; Savanaclaw dorm (here); Octavinelle dorm; Scarabia dorm; Pomefiore Dorm; Ignihyde Dorm; Diasomnia Dorm

Leona Kingscholar – It isn’t often that his dorm throws a feast, but when they do they party like, well, animals. He knows that you haven’t had a chance to really experience any of the cultures outside of the Isle, and let’s be honest, if there is anybody who needed a break in this damn school, it was you.  

You had crashed into his lounging spot, legs weak from dancing and a drink placed in your hand. He doesn’t think anything of it, telling you that it’s safe. He had meant the drink. But when you look at him, you hear something different. Something whole, something that echoes in the way he shares his bed with you, his dorm, his food, his people, rough and tumble as they are. Even when you are fighting to earn your share, you know that he wouldn’t allow things to go too far.  

When he looks at you trying to hide the tears, and even your soft explanation, he understands completely. By the Ancestors does he understand.  

He pulls you deeper into his chair, his jacket tossed over your head as he hides your weakness in the seclusion and dark.  

“One day, you’ll get the lion’s share.” He rumbles, rubbing at your arms while you sip on your drink. “Joy will crack under your teeth and you will never hunger for it again.”  

Ruggie Bucci – It isn’t often that they hold a feast at Savanaclaw but when they do they party like, well, animals. Ruggie especially has been looking forward to this for weeks. Free food, great drinks, dancing until the sun comes up, and all those delicious leftovers to snack on and hide away!  

He never expected to get you on the dance floor, but you learn fast, hips swaying and stomping with beats from his home. It’s only when you two finally come together, sweating and out of breath that he realizes.  

When you explain though, he starts laughing, his own tears pinpricking until the both of you are simply taken off the floor, your hysterical laughter almost concerning. Ruggie picks the both of you up, splits a donut and eases the both of you back into the couches.  

“We are going to be rich in joy one day,” he tells you, eyes shining as he wipes the tears from both of your eyes, “You’ll be drunk of it, with no end in sight.”  

Jack Howl – You are one of the few people who will at least try and keep up on his runs, and he appreciates it. He knows it’s mainly for the views at the end, but you come none the less, and it’s nice to have a running buddy, even if he has to run a bit slower for you.  

When the sun peaks out over the water, it’s a sunrise he’s seen a dozen times over. The sun in bringing a glow to your face, the wind tossing your hair around, he still appreciates little moments like these were the both of you get to get away. That’s when he sees the small trail ghosting over your cheek.  

He doesn’t fully understand, but he pulls you in anyway, nuzzling into your neck until you start giggling from his hair.  

“Most people don’t cry when they’re happy, you know.” He murmurs, but his tail is going a mile a minute behind him.  

[sxorpiomooon]

How will your fs family or ancestors react to you? A pac reading

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Pile 1-

This is HILARIOUS bc I see them stressing out so bad there will probably be issues in you guys getting married or together something about being unconventional I am suddenly reminded of nobody wants this the new netflix show? The story is basically of how a woman who runs her sex podcast gets together with a guys who's rabi. I see their ancestors panicking bc they will be like omL tHiS IS TERRIBLE THR WORST THING THAT COULD HAVE HAPPENED to .... Um wait..... It's actually not that bad? I see them panicking then finally catching their breath like oh.. oooohhh it's not that deep I heard "we're fine, we are fine" lmaao it's gonna be so hilarious. Do watch that show guys

Pile 2-

This is extremely rude and outrageous but they might feel as if their son has wasted his potential I heard "years of hard work going into the drain" there will be a lot of drama I also feel like this is possibly mainly the mother of your fs very dramatic and doing all that for no reason sort of lady. She will probably be causing issues and trying to bring you down every chance she gets. Instead of they i keep thinking of a she again and again it's def their mother. They will feel as if they have lost and will be extremely disappointed. Oml so much drama lord I can hear an old woman crying for no fucking reason. She might give alot of taunts such as "oh irs mt fault I raised you wrong this is my failure" blahblahblah I heard old hag LMAOO so yes, don't listen to that old hag my pile 2<3

Pile 3-

Finally a good pile🙏

I think they'll be quite stressed I got Italy for some reason I also think you'll be randomly revealed to them so it might take them as a surprise like huh? They might have not been aware of you before which will cause them stress. But later on I see them loving you so much especially the mother. I see the mother being the most stressed first and then ending up loving you the most. One of the parties might travel to meet the other? They will welcome you in their home very warmly. I see them treating you like their own never making you feel like an outsider lmao very close it's like they are your parents now too. "I'm coming home I'm coming home tell the world I'm coming home" i keep hearing this song again and again I'm also hearing stand by you by rachel platten. I'm even seeing wings for some reason haha. Something that I see is that they will also admire the love that you are your fs will share. Very beautiful family lord I'm seeing orange colour sunset too. Suddenly saw that super famous cute kid rustyn too.

Pile 4-

Hell naww, they will 100% try to persuade their son/daughter to leave your behind. I see them pulling dirty tricks😭 They might even manage to cause a rift between the two of you but I see y'all coming back together eventually again. I keep seeing someone travelling via boat in the water maybe they will quite literally try to separate you by sending them to some foreign lands but I do see both of you getting together again and them realising that they won't succeed. There might be this financial or class divide between the two of you which is why they'll do it. This reminds me of this webtoon that I was reading recently "the child that looks just like me" give it a read if you wish to.

Thankyou!!

[onion-souls]

I remember reading that in some of Lovecraft's later letters, he had a profound change in his racism and otherwise unpleasantness. Do you know what I'm talking about? Might you know where to find those specific correspondences?

(Going to be citing letters throughout this, which can easily be found by googling Lovecraft letter to [named correspondent] [date]. Don't have time at the moment to hyperlink everything.) I wouldn't say profound, but he mellowed out. His most extreme racism shows up largely in his 1910s to 20s writings, which is when he was talking about a "Teutonic master race" of which the Anglo-Saxon was the superior breed, the genetic inferiority of the Celts, and praising the KKK. This started to diminish largely due to exposure to people. He learned he was partially Welsh, and he began a deep friendship via correspondence with Robert E. Howard, who, like many Irish-Americans of the time, had a strong connection to a fantastical image of his Celtic ancestors revived through the late Victorian imagination. His anti-Celtic statements were always something of an affectation of British Imperial attitudes rather than anything that really made sense for a turn of the century Rhode Islander, and they were the first thing to fall away. His antisemitism also shifted after his meeting with his wife of seventeen years, Sonia Greene, and friendship with Robert Bloch; apparently he would still say dumb shit but they were quick to call him out on it. In his November 8, 1934 letter writer John Vernon Shea, he expresses embarrassment on some of his older and then still lingering views and specifically asks Shea not to quote them at Bloch. Possibly the most influential figure in his social circle, however, was James Ferdinand Morton, Jr., an anarchist political writer, Baha'i convert, and NAACP member frequently who took Lovecraft to task for his racism and basically helped him see that the KKK was a terrorist organization. Lovecraft had hideous views but he was also a rather soft sort - not from an anti-racist angle, but actual violence was a thuggish act unsuited of a gentleman. This was also what was causing some of his shifts in his antisemitic statements in that 1934-37 period; he was still bigoted, but didn't like the news that coming out of Europe.

But he also never dropped his anti-Black racism, and I would recommend looking into his correspondence to Morton, particularly his March 23, 1931 letter, where he dismisses Franz Boas' well-evidenced skepticism towards the then fashionable anthropological racial divisions. He was willing to change and even deconstruct his views on everyone else, but kind of put his foot down when it came to Black people. By 1934 (and note that he died on March 15, 1937), his attitudes had largely shifted to a kind of Anglo-Saxon Cultural Supremacism mixed with his growing sympathies with non-Marxist Utopian socialism (somewhat of the Edwardian progressive H.G. Wells sort), best expressed in his November 22, 1934 letter to poet Natalie H. Wooley [Collected with his letters to Robert Bloch] and a January 18, 1931 letter to Morton . He basically started to ease up on the genetic racism (though the anti-Black racism never went away, at least not in anything recorded his writing) and pivoted to a notion that anyone could plausibly achieve an equal level of civilization as the WASP/"Nordic," but he still had a strong streak of racial/societal separatism, expressing a distrust of "cultural mongrelism" as late as January '31 [to Morton]. The one thing I would push back on is the common statement that he was unusually racist and antisemitic for his time, which really isn't true considering that his most extreme statements were also platforms of mainstream political parties in the 10s to 40s, and the pulp fiction published alongside his works were pretty much just as shitty, if not worse. It's just that he and Howard are some of the few pulp magazine writers from the period that we still read, so the cringe lingers. He was always a bigot, despite some evolution, but what's particularly interesting about him is that he was willing to maintain a social circle of people who would call him out on it. Complicated guy, but I think a lot of this is wondering what he would have become if he lived to see the 40s to 60s and kind of hoping that he would have kept changing.

[gloomyluvr]

TANS AND WHORES (just one and his name's rafe)

in which rafe plans a last minute beach day

fem!reader x rafe cameron

fluff

warnings!: playful whore and slut shaming (between reader and rafe), not a warning but reader is kinda suggested to have darker skin than rafe

a/n: may the ancestors forgive me for writing about a white man who'd probably call me a beaner if he was real 😓🙏. it's so hard to write any petnames in english cuz it's not what the language i use for petnames typically. but i have to compromise and have reader call rafe something silly or simply just rafe 🥸 pls lmk of any spelling errors tysm!

beach days with the pogues were definitely one of your favorite past times. no doubt about it. there was just something so intimate about spending the whole day together by the ocean without a single care in the world other than partying, surfing and being inebriated. 

but you loved beach days with rafe cameron just a bit more. especially when rafe was the one who planned them.

it was only 10am when the buzzing of your phone from under your pillow had awoken you. you groaned, annoyed that someone had disrupted your beauty sleep. without even looking at the contact , you answered the call. 

“what.” you made no effort to hide your annoyance. 

“hey baby, you just waking up?” 

quickly, you sat up. your sour mood instantly turns sweet at the sound of your boyfriend's voice. “hey sexy, yeah sorry i slept real late last night. what’s up?”

rafe chuckled at the switch up, “the uv’s at 9 and supposed to reach 11 so, i thought we should go to the beach. it’d be perfect for you to try that oil.”

“aww you remembered! you’re such a cutie patootie, awww!” you teased.

“yeah yeah, whatever. anyways, i have our bag packed. i want you ready by 10:30. i’m about to leave tannyhill.”

you pulled your phone away to check the time and gasped. “rafe it’s already 10:16! that’s not enough time to get ready!” 

“yes it is, you don’t needa put on makeup or do your hair. just throw on a fucking bikini,” he demanded, “i already packed some extra clothes in the bag just in case we go somewhere after.”

you groaned into the phone dramatically, letting your frustration be known. but rafe stayed unbothered, already used to your bratty attitude.

“10:30.” he restated before hanging up.

at the beach, rafe set up your spot with your towels, umbrella, and chairs all while you stood next to him serving looks. once everything was set, you kneeled on your towel while digging into the bag rafe had messily packed, desperately searching for your tanning oil as rafe sat on the towels behind you, putting on sunscreen as you had advised him the u.v. rays were far too intense for his sensitive pale skin to handle.

“baby can you get my back please.” 

you looked back at rafe only to find his bare back facing you, “put on a shirt whore!” 

“you’re literally wearing the skimpiest bikini ever, slut!” rafe called back, used to your usual antics. 

you gasped, “i’m gonna let you burn until your skin flakes off.” you threatened, smacking the blonde’s back causing him to grunt.

“do it then.” he challenged, knowing you would never let him suffer such pain. responding in a sigh you stayed quiet as you gave in and covered his freckled back with spf. “how come you can practically be naked while i can’t even take my shirt off.” 

“because,” you massaged the sunscreen into rafe’s tense muscles, “i’m super hot and sexy and i have an even hotter and sexier, jacked, six foot something boyfriend who can fight. unfortunately for him, my manicures matter to me too much to wanna ruin them. that and i can't fight for shit. okayyy my turnnn!”

you quickly handed rafe the expensive ass tanning oil you begged him for. according to you, it worked wayyy quicker than the typical drugstore oils that had barely even tinted your naturally tan skin plus it even had skin benefits or some bullshit.

 rafe only hummed, before switching places with you. he poured the greasy oil into his hands, rubbing them together. he scoffed, not believing he had spent nearly 100 dollars on the oil. not that it had hurt his wallet or anything, he just didn’t understand what the big deal was. regardless he bought it for you just to see the smile he loved so dearly.

large hands began messily roaming your back. rafe made sure to get every nook and cranny of your back, partly because he wanted to protect you from the sun, but mostly because he would take whatever chance he could to touch you. 

“want me to help you with your front too?” rafe asked ever so kindly, but you looked back at him to see him with the biggest smirk on his face that immediately let you know this generous offer was nowhere as innocent as it seems. he raised his eyebrows, eager for a response.

“fine, but don’t be nasty.” you turned back around, patiently waiting for rafe as you watched the waves crash.

“yea yea, whatever you want.” rafe muttered. you didn’t have to see your boyfriend to know that he had the biggest smile on his face, with no intention of staying true to his word.

bonus a/n: originally, this was supposed to be a bit longer, i was gonna write them in the water just bullying each other but then it became really suggestive and like i scrapped it.

i write to have a lil rafe cameron fluff in the sea of smuts and angst 😓 and yet here i was, close to unintentionally writing smut !!! beyondddd ashamed of myself. but no hate to smut writers, i love u freaks 🙂‍↕️

[ghouldump]

Trick or Treat | Lestat de Lioncourt x Reader

ෆ sneaking into the supposedly empty townhouse, you are met by a surprise

literally something fun and random since we’re officially in spooky season 😆🎃

“what are you supposed to be?” the random girl asked, as you stood in the mirror, applying the burgundy lipstick.

“a vampire,” you said, sitting the stick down to reach and tighten your corset.

“could've had me fooled, i thought you were a hooker,” she cackled, while you frowned.

“and you are?”

“poision ivy-

“are you sure though, because it’s giving fiona in shrek forever after,” you said, the rest of your friends laughing, while she frowned, storming out of the crowded bathroom.

“bitch,” you mumbled, watching the door as she walked away.

you had allowed your friends to drag you to the nightclub, the prices were half off for those with costumes, which is why you dressed up to begin with. you loved to party, but not tonight, not when you intended on binge-watching all of your favorite halloween movies you'd seen too many times to count.

“i’ll be back, i need some air,” you mumbled, leaving the restroom before any of your friends could stop you.

stepping outside, you sighed, it was refreshing to be out of the humid building. the wind blowing in the night sky, as the tourist crowded the french quarters. you didn’t see the hype, everything was always overpriced — but your friends insisted, claiming all of the potential hook ups would be in the club tonight.

“y/n, are you okay?” kasey, a close friend, came out of the club, her eyebrows slightly raised.

“i’m fine, i’m just not feeling it, i think i’ll catch an uber home,” you said.

“i can bring you-

“no, i don’t want to ruin tonight, i’ll text you when i’m home, you have fun,” you told her, hugging her as she nodded.

“see you later,” she said, going back into the building.

opening the app on your phone, you were about to type in your address, when the voice caught your attention.

“this is the house of the famous rockstar, lestat de lioncourt, he claims to be a vampire,” the tour guide said excitedly, as you slowly approached the group.

“do you think it’s true?”

“well, new orleans has always been a strange place, so we can’t be sure — but he could have a potential ancestor who’s name was also lestat, who moved here, from france,” the guide explained, making you look at the large townhouse.

you were just now hearing about this. you had seen the rockstar a few times in the media, but you had no idea he lived in new orleans. there was too much history from all over the city, to be fascinated by one individual, who could have been a vampire.

pretending to be on your phone, you waited until the group moved along before you slipped past the fence, and went to the door. twisting the knob, you were surprised to find the door unlocked. were they not afraid people would sneak into this house?

shutting the door behind yourself, you turned on your phone’s flashlight, and walking through the house. first, the living room, vintage, yet timeless, each piece of furniture, costly in price. thousands of books, most you hadn’t even heard of, your fingers lightly dragged across them. moving upstairs, you stopped at the first door, twisting the knob, but realized, it was locked.

going to the second door, you entered the master bedroom, eyeing the king-sized bed in the middle of the room, you walked from corner to corner, touching any and everything, when you accidentally triggered a lever — opening a hidden room. seeing a singular coffin, you gasped.

the rumors seemed to likely be true, you couldn’t wait to get home and text the group chat about this. turning to leave, you jumped back, as your flashlight was pointed at the blonde man, who stood around six feet, with peculiar blue eyes.

“oh my goodness, you scared the hell out of me,” you said, making him grin. his expression was sending chills down your spine.

“it isn’t nice to enter someone’s home without their permission,” he said, as you stared into his eyes, it dawned on you, that this was the rockstar…who is a vampire.

“i am so sorry, i wasn’t thinking, but i really need to get going-” you went to move around him, when he moved in front of you, the lights turning on. he hadn't even touched the switch, and yet the room had lit up in an instant.

“i can’t just let you leave, not after what you’ve seen,” he said, smiling as you backed away.

“i won’t tell anyone, i don’t know why i-

“shh, shh, you’re so afraid,” he said, his smiling growing, as he reached to touch your pounding heart.

“please don’t hurt me,” you shut your eyes, turning your head.

“trick or treat”

“excuse me?” you opened your eyes, facing him.

“trick or treat, let’s determine if you deserve to leave so freely,” he tilted his head.

“treat,” you gulped, as he grinned, his fangs showing.

“are you supposed to be a vampire?” he asked suddenly, chuckling.

“y-yes” he was the first person to get it right all night, in the first guess.

“i mean, i see it, but it’s a bit stereotypical, don’t you think,” he said, crossing his arms, as he examined the costume.

“where did you get it?” he reached, tracing the fabric.

“spirit…halloween,” you said, as he rolled his eyes.

“that explains why it feels so cheap,” he said before he was back staring at you.

“please don’t kill me”

“you’re an eccentric human, your thoughts are so complex, i think i’ll keep you around,” he said, moving closer. your thoughts were like a storm, conflicting, while intriguing.

“mister-

“don’t worry, chèrie, you are destined for a treat unlike any other,” he said, pulling you closer, his fangs sinking into your neck.

“is it still ringing? i can try calling her,” kasey stressed, a few hours into the morning, she realized you never texted her. the sun was now setting, and they were scrambling to get in contact with you.

meanwhile, in the luxurious townhouse, hidden in the secret room — lestat laid in his coffin. your phone lay on the counter, ringing for the millionth time, but you didn’t hear it. straddling his lap, there was a light thumping from the shifting of the coffin. your moans filled the walls, as lestat traced up your pretty skin, now covered with the beauty marks of his fangs.

coming down from the euphoric state, you leaned down, kissing his soft lips. moaning, you giggled as he kissed from your lips, onto your neck, before his fangs were back in your neck. your eyes rolled back, moaning at the feeling. while it hurt, the first few times, there was only pleasure now.

pulling away, you stared into lestat’s eyes, kissing his lips, tasting the iron from your blood. you couldn't help but admire the amount of control lestat had over himself.

“will you turn me into a vampire?” you asked him, as his hand went to your neck, tracing down to your shoulder.

“do you want to be a vampire?” he asked, as his hand moved back up, laying against your cheek, as you nodded.

“when i was younger, i used to pretend to be one,” you admitted.

“prove yourself to me, and we can discuss the possibility,” he said, as you pecked his lips once more, nodding in understanding.

“can i have your autograph, my friend are probably losing their minds, and i need a really good reason why i haven't reached out,” you told him, your nails trailing down his chest.

“of course, but i expect to see you back tomorrow night,” he said matter of factly, holding your hand, as you carefully stood.

going to your phone, your eyes widened at the number of calls and messages. “oh my-i don't think that will be enough, they’ll probably hate me after this,” you stressed, flenching, as he ended up behind you in a matter of seconds.

“tell them you were busy, stuck in a game of trick or treat,” he winked, as you nodded, beginning to get dressed. grabbing a marker, he signed your cleavage and sent you on your way, fully expecting you back in the next few hours.

god, you loved halloween.

i can't decide if i prefer a happy ending, or angst, like ughh

[thewritetofreespeech]

Could I request Astarion and Gale with a reader who's a descendant of a famous mage and acts super nonchalant about it?

Astarion

When they tell him about their ancestry, for no other reason that to make conversation, Astarion is surprised to hear the name.

Even when he was a mortal, that name was one of legend. People often forget that there are a lot of names like Elminster out there. Old names that conjure as much power in the name as the person themselves.

He can’t say he’s surprised. Looking at their face he could tell that they were apart of ‘nobility’.

Astarion does wonder if that gets them any perks, being related to a famous person. Entry to some secret society? Party invitations? At least a discount at Sorcerous Sundries?

Gale

“You’re related to---!” “Yes. Gale. I am. Can we stop taking about this please?”

The moment Gale finds out he is shocked, impressed, and a little hurt that they never told him about it.

How could they not tell him that they were related to an icon of the arcane arts? Furthermore, they let him just look like and idiot when they met, going on & on about his studies and being a great wizard. It's so embarrassing!!

Eventually he gets over it, and forgives them (though they don’t need forgiveness), and instead focuses on pestering them with questions about their ancestor and if they have any ‘relics’ from the late mage. Seeing the family’s little ‘exhibit’ of the great mage’s artifacts (which are really just a hair brush, some robes, and a non-magical necklace) becomes one of his reasons for living against the big Brain.

[idontknowmanijustlikereading]

Unique!AU continuation: Zoey

Okay, Zoey's turn to be unhumanified

Unlike Mira, who's abilities are primarily physical, Zoey's are primarily magical.

The physical aspects extend to speed and not much else. She's a bit more durable than a human, but not Mira level of durable.

Speed and endurance? She is a fucking demon. I'm talking can cross a room in a fraction of a second, not quite teleporting, but to the human eye it would look like it. The only reason Mira and Rumi keep up is because of their own inhuman genetics. The one time Celine caught Zoey speedblitzing she thought she blacked out for a moment and just didn't realize (we excuse so much shit on our own, and Zoey, a social butterfly, knows this, so she didn't bother making an excuse. She did nearly have an anxious breakdown about it when she was alone tho).

Can see in the dark, but doesn't get the animal shine to her eyes.

Unnaturally flexible, but suffers no joint issues/pain from it (apparently dokkaebi are enthusiastic wrestlers? Idk how flexible you have to be for wrestling, but I say you have to be flexible for it, so.). She liked to freak out Rumi and Mira by pulling her fingers flat against the back of her palm in the beginning, but then they got used to it. It was a party trick she used because she knew she could just excuse it as being double jointed or something similar.

Because of the wrestling aspect she also has strangely good balance. I'm talking cat like balance. Usually she plays up her clumsiness because of this, just to throw people off.

Despite all this she herself doesn't have a particularly big interest in wrestling (disappointing all of her dokkaebi ancestors smh (jk))

When it comes to the magical aspect there are a lot more things.

Has natural resistance to most magics and curses. That includes being able to tell if someone's been cursed or if someone is attempting to curse her.

Is extremely sensitive to magic. This allows her to also sense other magical beings, such as dragons and demons amongst other things...

This sensitivity also helped her a lot during demon hunter training. Because it was so familiar to her, she connected to the Honmoon very easily. Rumi was thrilled and Celine was honestly slightly suspicious.

She can fly -like properly fly- which aids her a lot in her speedblitzing. When she's alone she likes to just hover in the air and spin around like she's in a microwave, says it helps her think. When she needs to be stealthy she sometimes hovers imperceptibly above the ground so that her "footsteps" are completely silent.

Does have genuine magic. She can create fully-fledged illusions that feel like they have mass, can make sound etc. Can curse people if she wants to(never wants to). These are the strongest parts of her magic, but she can also do small things, like conjuring up a trip-worthy pebble, misting up Mira's glasses etc (Mostly things that creates a slight bit of chaos/mischief since Cham dokkaebis are known for playing pranks on humans, and even if Zoey isn't one, it's still in her DNA)

Since I went with her being part Go dokkaebi, she is naturally very good with most weapons, but her one true love is her Shin-kals. Go dokkaebis are supposed to be exceptional with arrows, but I just changed it to any projectiles.

And her magic extends to her weapons, allowing her control over them while they're in mid-air. We already see a little of this when she's fighting in the movie, since she kind of uses her blades like a bladed fan? Im just extending it a bit, allowing her to change the trajectory of them in mid-air. Think Yondu's arrow that he uses in the gotg movies. If she is focused enough she can also change the trajecotry of other people's projectiles. This is very difficult and draining for her tho.

When it comes to physical features one of the big things to keep in mind is that Zoey is the definition of uncanny valley. Mostly because of the illusion she puts up to hide herself, you can just kind of sense that she isn't quite human, quite normal.

But we're talking about what she actually looks like, so first and foremost: Her sclera(white part of the eye), gums, and tongue are pitch black. (learned to smile without teeth very quickly, unless she had had her illusion in place. Rumi and Mira are absolutely obsessed tho)

Speaking of teeth; her upper canines curl out slightly form her mouth, like tusks, similar to Mystery before his transformation. They aren't nearly as large though, they just barely peek out from beyond her lips (Mira and Rumi think they're adorable)

Has markings like Rumi, but hers look closer to tattoos, being black. They're also not sharp like the tiger-stripes demons tend to have, hers are far more angular and line-like. They kind of follow her bone structure, following the lines of her collarbones, the hollows of her cheeks etc. They are very slightly sunken into her skin, like scars. (is immensely jealous(not really) of Rumi's markings since hers glow fun colours while Zoey's do not)

Her ears are pointy, not long like an elf's, but still pointy. Like a goblin. (given that dokkaebis are kind of known as Korean goblins as far as i could tell lmao)

Her nails also grow into sharp points. They don't have any extra durability or anything, they just naturally grow into a triangle shape.

Kay, that's it. Imma get into the habits and urges of these guys next.

[lvl16cleric]

With someone of a rare race.

Astarion, Gale, Wyll, Halsin

Genre: Fluff, some angst with comfort.

~2.7k words

Astarion

(Aasimar!reader)

Holiness radiated from you. You were the blinding light of passion and ascension that people worshipped. Or that’s how it felt— people had expectations for Aasimars. The race with a touch of divinity in their blood. You were no different from your kin; expected to be holier than thou, defeat those who have sinned. You didn’t expect to fall in love with an undead of all things. One of the necrotic things you vowed to destroy as a being infused with radiant magic.

Astarion was beautiful, he was sweet when he wanted to be, and he had a humor that was a touch macabre but you found it almost charming. When he first came onto you, flirting that night at the party with the Tieflings, you swear you felt the sin billowing off him... But it only allured you more.

And now you were— dating? Somewhat? You kissed, you spoke in pet names and affections. You never wanted this, or that’s what you told yourself. You were supposed to slay creatures like him! Now, you slayed beasts side by side with the vampire. You even let him feed off you… What would your ancestors say? Would they come to you in a vision and smite you?

Astarion’s sweet coo broke you out of your deep thoughts. “Sweet, aren’t you coming to the tent? It’s rather late— and you know the bugs swarm to your light.” He grimaced playfully, his words held no bite, only a light tease. His sharp eyes took notice of your face: your eyes slightly squinted, your brow creased, a frown tugging at your lips.

He beckoned you closer, “Come on, pet. We ought to sleep.” He waited for you to enter the tent, stepping in after you. He watched as you laid on the bed roll, “Is something wrong, darling? Or do you always have such a bitter face before bed?” He sat beside you, gently touching your hair.

At first, you said nothing. Why worry him? You decided to murmur out, “I’m alright.” Your voice heavy in your throat yet light in tone. He wasn’t falling for that, after years of reading expressions and little body movements. He gently put his hand upon your face, cold compared to your living warmth. “Is it something I did?” He tilted his head, giving you those big red puppy eyes he didn’t know he had.

“No! You don’t do anything wrong and that’s the problem.” Radiance crackled off you as your thoughts grew too much on your mind and you finally snapped. “I’m supposed to— slay creatures like you!” You spat, sitting up. Astarion was forced to step back, your radiance pained him, as an undead creature, “My love..—“ He stammered. You cut him off, despite your cruelty. “I’m going against my divinity to be with you—! And yet… I love it! I love being with you! I shouldn’t. I should *hate* you. I should stake your heart. But I’d rather stake my own than do that to you.” You rambled, tears filling up those glowing eyes that shined bright in the dark of the tent, only otherwise lit by a few candles.

As the tears fell down your face, coating your cheeks, and your radiant energy slowly dimmed. “Look.. I even hurt you by being near you. How can this work out for us..?” You let out a soft sob. He could approach once the energy stopped crackling, huffing a bit. He wasn’t good with feelings, but for his dearest one who brought him out from the darkness and never pushed him, for the one who cared for him when it felt like no one could, he’d do anything. “Darling.. It doesn’t matter!” He sputtered. “I mean, and forgive me for using such an unoriginal phrase, but it doesn’t matter who we are on the outside. You, a brilliant aasimar with all that beautiful divinity through your veins. Me, an also brilliant vampire with cold blood in mine.” He gave a little tilt of his head, staring right into your teary eyes with his own. He reached for your hand, holding it.

He waited to see how you reacted, and when you adjusted into his arms, he held tight. “We’re both here in one piece, yes? We both have so much to give, and no stakes will be going through either of our lovely little hearts, my dear.” He stroked away the tears, feeling the glow of your now soft light on his skin. Perhaps even the undead could be sweet and worthy of another chance of life. You knew Astarion deserved one. Your ancestors be damned— this man was who you loved. And he loved you too. You could feel it in how he held you, how he stepped out of his own comfort zone to say some kind words meant to comfort your sobbing self. He deserved everything, and you’d be damned if anyone stopped you from giving the world to him.

Gale

(Star Elf!Reader)

Curiosity was one of Gale’s strongest suites. That’s why, when he met you, you clicked instantly. You, a beautiful star elf, from another plane of existence: Sildëyuir. He asked countless questions… It was almost never ending. “Is that the usual hair color, or is yours unique?” “Do you know of any good books that come from your realm?” “Say, I heard your realm is famous for having a slower time— two days is more like one. Is that true?” He spat out hundreds of questions, curious about your culture, your people, your customs.

Similarly, and to his surprise, you reciprocated. “Is the fruit in Faerûn as good as Sildëyuir?” “Are humans common here..?” “The feywild is beautiful, do you think it can compare to the material plane?” “What magics do you study, as a human?” You both rambled on and on, question after question. It’s your bonding ritual, so to say. He loves to learn; and you need to know more about this plane anyway if you wish to remain there.

As you bonded through shared inquisition, you grew... Fonder of one another. The questions turned more intimate, more personal. One night, he came to you and asked about the “mating rituals” of your people. You were flustered, to say the least. But you explained to your best ability about your culture on love-making. He nodded diligently at each word, taking mental notes.

When that fateful time came around, when Mystra doomed him to erupt the Absolute, and he took what he thought would be his last night with you… He used your words, and created something both he and you would enjoy. Specialized to bring both your cultures together, both in how the night went and how the ‘mating’ went.

Now, you two lay. Basking in the grass as he pointed out stars and named constellations. “You know— the Ursa Major…” He cut himself off with a question, “Do you see the constellations in your plane?” He barely gave you time to answer before spouting out another. “Oh! Do you have— Hmph!“ You decided to cut him off this time. With a kiss on his lips. He was caught off guard, but chuckled against your lips and kissed back.

“My love, what was that for?” He smiled, warmth filling his gaze. When you spoke, he cut you off playfully with a kiss just the same. After it broke, you two got into fits of loving laughter. “Do all people of your plane kiss so messily?” You teased at his lacking skills. He hadn’t kissed much after the orb and his fallout with Mystra! “Oh, leave me be.” He smiled, waving his hand gently at you.

You were his lovely Star Elf, his extraplanar love. He’d cherish you ‘til the end of Faerûn itself. And he would ask a million questions and annoy you until the end of it as well. Neither of you would have it any other way.

Wyll

(Goliath!Reader)

You were large, with strange markings decorating your form. They curved along your cheeks, to your neck, down to your torso and toes. You were taller than the rest of your companions by a long shot; over 7 foot tall to be exact. Growing up in a tribe in the wilds of Faerûn hardened you, and your people’s love for competition and achievements raised you to be hard-working and strong.

When you got that tadpole in your head, you thought for sure you’d be the odd one out. Always sticking out like a sore thumb. But you didn’t— this whole group was full of weirdos! Perhaps the most “normal” of the lot was Wyll. A famed defender titled the Blade of Frontiers. You respected his abilities and believed him to be a loyal and reliable man.

He had scars that marked his face and body, and after his encounter with Mizora— he was left with ridges along his frame and new horns to his silhouette. His body was a storybook, just as yours was. The markings on your body told your fate, and you couldn’t get tattoos because of it— these marks are your fate. His marks are his past. Both mean new beginnings.

Together, you were two tales that intertwined. Two books connected in lore. Two stars in the same constellation. That’s how he fell in love with you. Your bravery, your daring, your competitiveness, how you simply insisted you could dance better than him and he proceeded to show you up. You weren’t a sore loser— you accepted and laughed and let him help you up as you stumbled off your footing.

Wyll laughed as you attempted that dance again, you just had to do as good of a job as him! But you always fell, and he always helped you up and kissed your skinned knees and palms. “My love, you’re too tense. You have to let the movements flow.” He showed you a move, then motioned for you to try. You fell. Silly. He helped you up once more. This was your life for the next few hours…

And afterwards, when you had finally perfected the move he showed you, he gave you a warm kiss on the cheek. Though, you had to crouch down for him to do so. His lips pressed against the marks that lined your face, that made your face so beautiful.

As he traced your lines with his lips, you spoke quietly about what each line meant for your fate— the ones that already happened and the ones that would come later. “The one your lips just touched show I am courageous and will win battles.” You smiled softly as his lips pressed to the next. “I hope I’m somewhere in these marks, I end up going on lively and daring adventures with you.” He smiled up at you from where he was stood beside with you sitting. “Perhaps there is…” You murmured, moving to grab his chin and kiss him on the lips.

Despite the differences between you, you were somehow one and the same. Both strong, courageous, daring, yet both able to be soft and find peace in themselves and others.

Halsin

(Shadar-Kai!Reader)

Living between life and death was far from easy— especially when you’re in eternal servitude to the Raven Queen in the Shadowfell. But after the tadpole implanted in you— her voice no longer lingers. A time of respite, it makes you not want to rid of the illithid tadpole sometimes. Become a mindflayer or be at the deity’s beck and call every minute… Neither sound very fun.

A man you met on your travels has taken an interest in you, though. Especially after you were shown to not be affected by the Shadow curse swarming the once prosperous land. Maybe it was because you were used to the effects of the Shadowfell. They’d already cursed you once— turned you from a beautiful elf into a husk that lingers between living and dying. Halsin believed this to be somewhat of a miracle atleast for the time. It would certainly help in aiding his friend Thaniel.

You traversed the lands, no bell rang and no lantern lugged around unlike your companions. It amazed him. But it also worried him. He wondered if he could cure you. He hadn’t read on what you were, or rather what you were cursed to be. A simple remove curse spell simply won’t work this time, he was afraid.

He met with you one night. “Hello, my heart.” A torch diligently lighting his path. You were relaxing in the shadows, it felt like home. You’d forgotten what life was like before you were turned. Who were you…? You didn’t know. Maybe it was for the better, you could start anew. Until the Raven Queen returns to command you. “Hello, Halsin.” You spoke back, your emotions were dimmed by your curse. You didn’t feel as much. But Halsin had some way of making you feel… alive.

The two of you sat in the grass, swirling dark greens and black shadows all around you, held at bay by the torchlight. “Not the most beautiful of natures creations— but I suppose if you enjoy it, it has its perks.” He chuckled, gently holding your hand. “It’s a wonder how you can survive these shadows… You know, I grew up here. Playing with Thaniel through the woods of this once prospering land.”

The land was once wonderful, he remembered it clearly. He wondered if you were once a beautiful elf, just as this land was once full of green and sunlight. Nature was nature, he loved you anyhow. “You know, my heart, is there something you remember from before… The Shadowfell got into you.” He spoke softly, his tone holding a deep love and curiosity for all things you.

You hummed, shaking your head. “Nothing. It’s all a blur. The Raven Queen keeps me in this stasis, and I don’t know much else. It’s a wonder what this tadpole can do for me.. No ravens around me, no words in my head… It’s almost a blessing and a curse.” You murmured, speaking with soft yet sad eyes. If only you could keep the effects of the Raven Queen at bay without needing the tadpole.

"Perhaps there's... an herb or a charm of some sort that could keep her away. I'm sure I could find something in the throes of my work. I want you safe, my heart. I'll accept you in any natural form you take, but if it pains you then I see no reason for it. She makes you perform deeds and go on long journeys on a whim... That is no suitable life for us, if we were to live at the grove." Halsin sighed with a heavy feel in his chest.

"Halsin, it's alright. I'm used to it." You muttered, avoiding the warmth of his eyes. Of course you felt bad about it, how couldn't you? You were cursed, far from perfect, far from the peace he deserved. Though he always spoke of balance, and you were a perfect balance between life and death itself. You were perfect for him, he always said. He always tried to assure you. You felt you didn't deserve him... "I believe it isn't, my heart. You deserve the peace you have without her in your head." He gently cupped your face, shaking his head somberly and making you connect eyes. "I adore you, my dearest... Please, never forget that. Curse or not, I will always try to help you. As you have helped me, and Thaniel and Oliver, a great deal... Soon, this land will be healed and hopefully we can find a way to heal you as well."

The two of you sat there, in one another's arms amongst the billowing shadows of the cursed lands. He loved you. He knew he did. He knew you loved him too, and that's all that mattered to him. Curse or no curse, you were still you. And maybe he could fix your curse with a little luck and some love...

a/n: hope u enjoyed!!! i love writing for rare dnd races,, its so fun to learn about them and their own uniqueness

[witchcraftwithwater]

Another collective “pick a pic” intuition reading, because there’s someone out there, even if it’s just one person, that may need to hear some of this. Since this is a collective reading, take what resonates (if any) and leave the rest!

Letting you know that I don’t sugarcoat readings! What I am told and feel is what you’ll get! If you don’t want that, this isn’t the reading for you!

Pic 1 - 1963 Original Midge doll

Pic 2 - 2019 Pop star Barbie

Pic 3 - 2023 Brooklyn from Barbie A Touch of Magic

Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and pick the picture (or pictures) you’re drawn to!

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Picture 1:

I’m getting a strong feeling that there’s someone you have a crush on or have feelings for. Someone you really hope you’ll get together with and hope they feel the same way! Here’s the thing. You might find out from them or a third party that they do like you, which you’ll be super happy about. However, I gotta be honest and let you know that they aren’t the one for you. Even if you get together and date, you won’t end up with them in the end. You could be feeling happiness and that “of course they are the one!” But my pile 1’s, they aren’t the one and you’ll learn that in one way or another.

You’ll meet that person you’re meant to be with, but please don’t rush into things because of loneliness. You and your love will find each other when the time is right and no matter what, you can’t force it. No matter how hard you try. The universe isn’t playing, it’s telling you to take the time to love yourself and to heal from any wounds you have. To not rush because you are running from those wounds. You can’t run from pain. That’s not to say you need to completely heal from pain because we all know trauma doesn’t just go away, no matter how long has passed.

You will heal! Even if you feel you won’t and that you’ll hurt forever, things will get better and when you meet your love you will be strong and confident!

Please don’t give up!

Picture 2:

I am feeling that you, my pile 2’s, are stuck. You have been trying to do something, trying to accomplish a goal or just move forward in life but damn, something is blocking your way and it’s driving you crazy! What is this that’s blocking you? Is it family? Is it the legal system? A disability? Whatever it is, it’s almost like a brick wall in your path and no matter how you try, it won’t break and you can’t seem to go around or climb over it.

I can sense this feeling of… feeling useless? Which you are not!!! But you can’t help feeling things, even if they are bs. You’ve tried so much and so long that you feel like you’ll never move forward. Never get out of this rut you feel stuck in. Some of you want to move out of your parent(s) house but can’t right now and you are feeling bad because you have friends or family who live on their own and you’re wondering why the heck you’re still home and why you’re stuck?

Also, if it’s the legal system, whyyyyy oh whyyyy aren’t they helping you? They are helping others, why not you? Maybe it’s a disability and you need help moving out but the system isn’t giving you the resources you need.

Please know that you’ll make it out of this. It may feel like you won’t and that you don’t know what you’re supposed to be doing, but the universe knows what you are going to do and when you do you will remember these times and how you got through them!

Picture 3:

This is kinda weird, but you all are going to get into something soon. A hobby or just something that really interests you. It could be learning about your ancestors. Maybe it’s starting to collect something that makes you super happy to see every day. I see some of you starting a book series that’ll be one that really changes your life in the way I’m sure a lot of you know. Some of you will love it so much that when you finish the series you literally start it over the second the final book ends.

When you find this thing, it’ll feel like you’ve found a brand new part of you that you didn’t know was missing.

It makes me really happy knowing how happy you will be! This thing will be your escape from the world. Something you can always rely on to make you feel good. You could even think about it all day until you can do it again.

This will be your special thing. Something you can keep to yourself and not have to share with others. Your own piece of heaven!

You don’t have to go searching for it, it’ll come to you and pretty soon too!

Have fun!

————

I hope this helped someone! I don’t normally do these since I used to do tarot readings a lot, but I have some spiritual gifts and want to help others.

I’d like to do more of these if people enjoy them! Like or reblog to let me know!

[astrow0rldx]

Dark Asteroids

TW Very Dark Themes of Human Experience & Nature.

Look at the house its in to show where it would show up, and its aspects to see how it influences different energies in your life.

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narcissus (37117) - narcissist. your side, or people in your life.

nessus (7066) - abuser, r@pist, predator. sexual abuse, obsession.

dejanaira (157) - ^ nessus victim. victim of these.

proserpina (26) - ruined innocence, abductions.

persephone (399) - ^ similar story. where time is not your own. held hostage, absence caused strife.

melete (56) - anxiety.

deprez (9795) - what makes us sad

pan (4450) - earthy carnal energy, lust, chase, desire.

maniac (228029) - inner maniac, where we do things other wouldn't, unexpected hobbies or passion.

lie (26955) - where you lie or manipulate, or get lied to about.

ate (111) - rushing to conclusions, delusional. respond to perceived, or real threats.

lucifer (1930) - where you are powerful. pride, egotistic. where you gain followers by manipulations. how you transform. why you look for revenge.

phaeton (3200) - dangerous behavior, people that got carried away, car crashes, accidents.

icarus (1566) - accidents, excessive risk.

nemesis (128) - enemies. vengeful self.

sado (118230) - sadistic dark sexual expression. borderline pain. thats that make us sad hard time expressing.

myrrha (381) - sexual relationships that go against natural law.

medusa (149) - your the prettiest, natural beauty can be corrupted by others. assault. punishment for something that isn't your fault.

karma (3811) - karmic connections, circumstances. fated.

tantalus (2102) - never getting what you want. always out of reach, temptation without satisfaction.

furia (194982) - our anger. what proves it. what attitudes bother us.

cassandra (114) - a gift & a curse. where your rejection ruined your life. where no one believes what you say

anubis (1912) - egyptian god of the dead.

grieve (4451) - grieve, grief, mourning, sorrow.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

for Nessus and pan to be in my 7th house i do attract those type of people. lustful, predatory men. but like in my actual relationships to.

furia is in my 4th house and i get really angry in the home, my mars is also there. narcissus is in my 4th house and and i have a narcissistic mother. my ancestors i work with seem to be very strong and aggressive to.

phaeton, dangerous behavior, accidents, and car crashes are prevalent in my dreams stuff like that and it's in my 12th house. also mania is there and spirituality, drugs, sleep/dreams, psychology could be where i have an unexpected hobby and passion others wouldn't.

icarus is another dangerous behavior, excessive risk. in my 5th house of parties, sex, creativity, entertainment etc. while deprez is there to that causes depression. as i read or write out celebrity chart analysis, everything puts together as lore, jhene aiko, jeffery dahmer, donald trump, etc. so as im writing mines out and its just mini asteroids, i love to see the depths, and art of my birth chart.

my lucifer is in the same house as my lilith the 3rd. also where my sun and venus is. and i do have really good mental manipulation skills, lying and using my words to scheme. but im only so aware because im not to much in my ego about it and never really liked to since a kid except when i needed to, but was always aware of that "power". nemesis is there and that is also my vengeful self. ate is also there in my 3rd house lol, rushing to conclusions, delusional. respond to perceived, or real threats. but these characters are very influnced in my school life also. im also a big trickster, love mind games, dark humor,etc.

tantalus in my 2nd house is frustrating. so as medusa in my 6th house of day to day activities & work environment. proserpina and persophone in my 10th and 2nd house is scary.