#was there ever any character who like pretended to be a zombie to attack and eat ppl

[plantsucc]

boys when they take their central nervous system stimulant (ADHD pills) and can finally live out their dreams 🤤

[imsparky2002]

Coward and Proud of It

(Nathaniel is drawing in his sketchbook after another akuma attack, and notices his classmates looking embarassed, their faces riddled with guilt.)

Nathaniel: Why do you guys look like that?

Alix: Dude, we’re such horrible friends! We forgot about you again!

(He looked confused. She sounded sincere, but why?)

Rose: I can’t believe we left you behind! We’re supposed to look out for each other!

Nathaniel: Uh, what are you talking about?

Nino: We didn’t go back to look for you dude! We were too busy saving our own skins. (He looks ashamed. Nathaniel realizes what’s going on.)

Nathaniel: Are you talking about the last akuma attack? You think you abandoned me?

Kim: Yeah! You were nowhere to be found. Weren’t you looking for us?

Nathaniel: Uh... no? Guys, you didn’t leave me behind. I left you.

(The entire class gasps in shock.)

Chloe: What are you on about, Kurtzberg?!

(He just rolls his eyes at the girl.)

Nathaniel: Whenever I am able to do so, I slip away from you guys. Afterall, Akumas seem to have a magnet for our group. And the best way to avoid getting killed is to lay low, away from the source.

Adrien: You make it sound like we’re a liability to you!

Nathaniel: *Bluntly* You are. You all run around like headless chickens, instead of ducking for cover and keeping your heads down. If this were a zombie apocalypse, you’d fail horribly. Well, except for Adrien and Marinette. Somehow you two always manage to avoid the brunt of the attacks. Not to mention you’ve never been akumatized yourselves. Main character energy if I’ve ever seen it.

Marinette: Yeah... that’s the reason. *Internally sweating*

Max: Nathaniel, you make up one fourteenth of a group. I am pretty sure we’d realize if you had abandoned us.

Nathaniel: Well, Max, for a guy with such a high iq, you clearly weren’t smart enough the other four times I did it.

Alya: Hold on a second, you’ve left us FIVE TIMES?!

(Nathaniel nods. He doesn’t understand why everyone seems so surprised.)

Nathaniel: You make it sound like it’s such a hard thing to do. When you’re all freaking out like that, it’s easy for a quiet guy like me to slip away.

Alix: (Talking about the Art Club Squad) But every time we texted you in the group chat, you acted like you were trying to find us. You even said you understood how panicked we got.

Nathaniel: Yeah, I was lying. You think I’m gonna reveal my escape plans? Then you’ll wanna join me, and I can’t have anyone from this class, even my friends, putting a target on my back via association.

Juleka: *Mumbling* Ouch, dude.

Chloe: Hmph! Well if you’re so elusive, tell us how on earth a nobody like you managed to survive all these attacks.

Nathaniel: Why should I tell you? You’d just try to join me next time.

(Rose uses her puppy dog eyes, and he caves.)

Nathaniel: Alright, fine. But I’m not taking any of you next time, you hear me?

(They grumble and nod.)

Nathaniel: Ok, Stormy Weather was pretty easy. All I had to do was avoid Alec, head home to my house, shut all the windows, lock the doors, hide under the bed, and done. For some reason, Akumas usually attack anyone unlucky enough to be outside. If they don’t have a specific victim in mind that is.

(The classmates all mutter in agreement. He had a point.)

Nathaniel: Next up was Guitar Villain, and once again you all ran off together, not even thinking of splitting up. And it seems none of you got the idea of just pretending to like the music. That’s what I did, just copied what I saw Ivan doing in class the day before, and headbanged like there was no tomorrow. I find the music to be cringe as all hell, not to mention the singer’s a deadbeat dad with an obviously fake English accent, but I had to fake it to make it.

Juleka: *Muttering* He really is a scumbag.

Nathaniel: Then there was Frightingale. I didn’t escape by myself, since I got a helping hand from a certain cute writer who I had been in the music video with. Turns out we had both been crushing on the other for awhile, and finally had the courage to ask eachother out. He took me to a safespot with the other kids in Mendeliev’s class, they took a liking to me, since I actually bothered to ask about their lives. You do realize that the kids besides Marc, Mireille, Jean and Aurore have names right?

Marinette: Of course we did!

Nathaniel: Really, what are they?

(The class is unable to even come up with a guess.)

Sabrina: Uh...

Nathaniel: That’s what I thought. Anyway, Zombizou was my favorite. Me and the Science kids got to kick love-zombie ass, and in order to avoid suspicion, Marc and I kept making out whenever they were near. It was so awesome! (He blushes before getting back on topic.) So yeah. You guys never abandoned me, I abandoned you. And before you say anything, no, I’m not sorry.

Alix: *Looking forlorn* But dude... we’re your friends!

Nathaniel: Well, you are. Most of the Art Squad is, but the rest of you only interact with me if you need something for your ships. You realize I’m an accomplished cartoonist, right? The Ladybug comic I work on with Marc is a huge success. I’m just as important as the rest of you!

Kim: Dude, we aren’t saying you’re not.

Nathaniel: Well I wasn’t important enough for any of you to notice I was being bullied by Chloe?

Chloe: Oh please, Kurtzberg. You got off easy.

Marinette: She made everyone’s life bad, Nathaniel. Not just yours!

Nathaniel: When you get bullied, everyone coddles you. When I get humiliated in front of the class, nobody besides my art friends came to comfort me, to explain to me why I got akumatized, why I was right to feel angry about what happened. Marc’s class also took the time to explain to me how it was creepy to write my self-insert being in love with a real classmate. They’re the reason I apologized to you, Marinette.

Chloe: Well if they’re so cool, then why don’t you join them!

Mylene: Chloe! We wouldn’t want that! Nathaniel’s our friend!

Nathaniel: Actually, that’s what I plan on doing next year. No offense, but I can only tolerate like half of you. I’d rather be with a class that actually recognizes my value, that takes the time to ask how I’m doing. If that makes me a background character in your world, so be it.

(He gets up and sees Marc waiting for him.)

Nathaniel: I’m not some helpless little lamb that gets lost whenever there’s an akuma. I’m a survivor, a coward, and I’m proud of it. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna make out with my boyfriend.

(He smirks as he sees each classmate with their jaw on the floor.)

Turns out our Nath wasn’t abandoned after all. He’s just an escape artist. This felt so cathartic to write, and I hope you enjoyed it. As usual, let me know your thoughts in reblogs, replies, posts, and asks. @artzychic27 @msweebyness 

[immaturityofthomasastruc]

IOTA Reviews: Sole Crusher

Well... It's finally here... the episode introducing the new bee hero. And what do you know? It looks like I was right about how the new character would be portrayed.

It's kind of funny how I made predictions exaggerating what could happen, and they were surprisingly accurate. Isn't that funny?

Let's just get into the seventh (chronologically the seventh and the seventh episode in the season to air after “Mr. Pigeon 72”) episode of Miraculous Ladybug's fourth season: Sole Crusher. Damn, I hate that a pun this clever was used for the title.

We get to the point pretty quickly with the first scene being Zoe arriving in Paris and getting a tour of the city. She asks to stop at the Dupain-Cheng bakery, where she meets Marinette through some brief Unfunny Marinette Slapstick. The two quickly strike up a conversation.

I mean, it's not like Zoe is the sister of the absolute worst human being in existence, right?

Marinette compliments Zoe's shoes, and she points out that she designed them herself, and wrote every good thing anyone has ever said to her on them. But because she only has one friend, there's only a standard “I <3 U” on the left shoe.

So Zoe leaves the bakery and heads to Le Grand Paris where she meets her mother, Audrey. Unlike how she talked with Marinette, Zoe pretends to be just as snobby as Audrey in order to fit in. She then meets up with Chloe, who criticizes her for having poor person things like a phone without any diamonds embedded in it. And then she sees Zoe's shoes.

Look, that meme was already dated when it was referenced in Black Panther three years ago. Please don't try to reference memes in 2021, Miraculous Ladybug.

Chloe offers some golden heels while saying that those kind of shoes are for winners to wear and crush the losers underneath. This is the only episode to mention this kind of ideology, and believe me, it gets worse when Chloe decides to teach Zoe how to be like her.

Get used to this. This episode is all about demolishing any semblance of likability in Chloe's character. Now that Astruc doesn't have to bother with writing Chloe with decency since she's not Queen Bee, watch as he turns her into an absolute caricature of her former self.

Yes, Chloe has ordered her father to give her a lot of frivolous things in the past, but she has been shown to care about him, like immediately rushing to hug him after she was safe in “Origins” and showing concern for when he was akumatized into Malediktator while apologizing for causing it. For the love of God, one of the first things she did when she allied with Hawkmoth at the end of Season 3 was to have him unto her parents' akumatization. I guess she only cared about her rich parents for their status and not because she actually loved them right?

Next up on the list of Chloe's positive qualities to ruin is her friendship with Sabrina.

🎶It's seven o'clock in the morning🎶 🎶I can't believe they made this scene🎶 🎶With the writing Astruc's enforcing🎶 🎶It's like he's trying to piss off me🎶

Yep, Chloe doesn't view Sabrina in a twisted view of friendship anymore. Now she's a slave. I'm not exaggerating by the way, he actually said that in a tweet.

THIS IS WHAT THOMAS ASTRUC ACTUALLY BELIEVES

Okay, so I guess all those times we saw Chloe playing superheroes with Sabrina in “Antibug” and “Miraculer” were just a slave driver playing with their property. Actually apologizing to Sabrina for getting her akumatized in those episodes? Protecting her from the Scarlet Akumas in “Ladybug”? She was just interested in keeping her slave around. I think Astruc may have slept through the slavery unit in his history class. Yes, Sabrina was mostly used as a joke to show how controlling Chloe could be, but there were still semblances of an actual friendship between the two.

Chloe arrives at school and introduces Zoe as her half-sister, despite being the same age and having the same mother. Because I guess we can add basic biology to the list of things the writers don't understand. Now that we're at school, Chloe's friendship with Adrien is next up on the chopping block.

Yep, despite being Adrien's only friend and making a big deal about valuing his friendship to the point where she threw a big party just to make sure he wouldn't leave her and risked cooperating with an Akuma to save him, now Chloe just sees Adrien as a rich meal ticket. Two of the earliest episodes to show Chloe had a more compassionate side to her, and they just undid them. Even as much as I hated the episode, “Felix” showed Chloe was willing to cooperate with Marinette and her friends just to find a way to cheer Adrien up on the anniversary of his mother's not-death.

For the love of God, Astruc, 1984 was supposed to warn people about what could happen if they rewrote the past, not encourage people to rewrite the past. He probably finished Animal Farm thinking Snowball really did work alongside the humans, didn't he?

Marinette comes up and Zoe pretends to hate her, leading Marinette to wonder why she did that. She texts Zoe (she gave her number to her earlier) and invites her to a concert on the Liberty, but Chloe finds out. Zoe thinks fast and pretends it's just so she can torment her more. Chloe then takes out a book listing all the ways she can torture Marinette. I wonder if this is a metaphor for the writing process behind most of the episodes last season.

Zoe decides to go outside for some fresh air, and Andre comforts her. Funny how Andre bends over backwards to give Chloe whatever she wants, yet he's willing to actually talk to Zoe like an actual parent. Andre tries to cheer Zoe up, but she talks about her past where she had to put on an act so she would be liked, but (bet you've never heard this before) she just wants to be accepted for who she truly is. The surge of emotions is enough for Shadowmoth to akumatize her into Sole Crusher.

In addition to having one of the most clever puns for an Akuma name, I actually like Sole Crusher's design. Not only is it a good excuse to reuse Chloe's character design, it makes sense thematically, as Chloe was trying to mold Zoe into a copy of herself. The gold and diamonds also make sense given Chloe's love for shiny things. Her powers tie into the bizarre belief Chloe has about stepping on the winners. Whenever Sole Crusher kicks or steps on someone, she absorbs them and gets progressively bigger, making it easier to do so. While it's not cracking my top ten anytime soon, it's still an interesting character design.

Sole Crusher heads to the hotel to get Chloe, and she manages to get away pretty quickly. Maybe in an alternate universe, she's a track star? For some reason, she runs to the Dupain-Cheng bakery and then... Oh my God... pushes Marinette's parents so they get absorbed by Sole Crusher, before trying to do the same with Marinette.

When has Chloe ever done something like that? Whenever she endangered someone during an Akuma attack, it was unintentional or a result of her naivety. She was only trapped in Pixelator's dimension because Adrien tried diving to save her, she only alerted Rogercop to Ladybug's presence because she eagerly called out for her, and during “Zombizou” she only tried to throw Sabrina towards the horde of kissing zombies once, and that was meant to highlight her growth. The only person to actually do stuff like this consistently is Lila, but I guess she got vaporized by Big Brother offscreen.

This episode is determined to make the audience hate Chloe by retconning everything about her character while portraying her as a complete monster. As bad as Chloe could get, she was never selfish enough to use anyone as a human shield. This kind of behavior honestly could be explained by saying Chloe was lashing out as a result of losing the Bee Miraculous permanently, but the events of the Season 3 finale aren't mentioned ONCE, not even in the next episode that introduces Queen Bee's replacement! How the hell can you set up the next Bee hero without explaining why the original needs to be replaced in the first place?! And trust me, I'm going to talk about Zoe replacing Chloe later.

Sole Crusher grabs Marinette in her hand, so the Horse Kwami, Kaalki, uses her power to teleport over to Adrien's house and inform him Ladybug needs help, meaning once again Adrien did nothing in this episode before becoming Cat Noir.

At the Liberty, Chloe offers more victims to Sole Crusher in the form of the band Kitty Section (consisting of Luka, Juleka, Rose, Ivan, and Mylene) and theatens the giant golden supervillain she can send her back to Paris, even though she's really not in a position to bargain right now. And she STILL continues to insult her. Do you hate Chloe yet? Come on, do you? The writers won't stop until you do.

After we see Sole Crusher's conflicted emotions, Marinette is set free by Cat Noir and transforms into Ladybug, immediately summoning her Lucky Charm, a shoehorn. They only learn Zoe's sneakers were where she were akumatized thanks to Chloe's ranting, so the episode unintentionally made Chloe save the day. Ladybug breaks into Le Grand Paris and breaks the sneakers where Zoe hid them, using the shoehorn to open a door. So Sole Crusher is de-evilized, Ladybug fixes the damage, and gives yet another charm to Zoe.

Afterwards, Zoe goes to the Liberty, apologizes for the act she put on, all while divulging to the audience her “tragic backstory”.

Of course, everyone welcomes her with open arms.

And right here is where the biggest problem I have with Zoe as a character. I normally hesitate to use this term given how often it gets thrown around when criticizing characters these days, but I really can't say anything else.

Zoe... is a Mary Sue.

For those who don't know, the term Mary Sue originated in a Star Trek fanfiction from 1973 satirizing several self-insert stories at the time. Most of these stories showed a beautiful young woman joining the crew of the Enterprise and immediately gaining the attention of the crew. Mary Sue parodied this character archetype by showing how much she was appreciated by Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock, the latter being driven to tears at her funeral despite his species being emotionless normally.

What does this have to do with Zoe? She has the exact same storyline as Mary Sue in the parody fanfiction. Her mere presence is enough to make Chloe act extremely out of character in an attempt to make her look better, and as soon as she apologizes while giving a frankly vague backstory, everyone just accepts her as their friend, and I mean everyone in the entire class. I'm sorry, but it just doesn't feel earned. Why was she bullied at her old school? What did her bullies have against her? What caused her to stop going along with her peers, and why did everyone turn against her? How the hell did the bullies who put cockroaches in another student's locker get no punishment while the victim was forced to transfer schools? It's an intentionally unclear backstory designed to make the audience feel sympathetic towards Zoe without actually doing anything else.

I want to ask anyone reading this who watched the episode a question: Outside of her backstory, what do we actually know about Zoe?

What is her personality like? She's nice? Socially awkward? We've never had a character like that in Miraculous Ladybug before! Sorry Marinette, Adrien, Juleka, Nathaniel, Mylene, and Marc, there's a new character with more personality than all of you combined!

What are her goals? She wants to be an actress? Great, but why? Even though there's no clear answer for why Marinette loves fashion, or why Alya loves journalism, or why Nino loves DJing, you can still see the passion in their lives when they do something related to their goals. Zoe only says she wants to be an actress, connecting it to her people pleaser backstory (and given how it ended, she must be a terrible actress), and in the next episode, she immediately gets the lead role in a student film.

When Mylene got the starring role in the movie in “Horrificator”, we at least got snippets of her acting skills in the same episode that established her desire to be an actress, which is also implied to be because she was inspired by her father in “The Mime”. She didn't just say she wanted to be an actress and got the leading role. She still had problems to overcome like her cowardice, which threw her own self-confidence into doubt. Here, Zoe just says she wants to be an actress, and is rewarded for no reason the very next episode.

Zoe basically exists only to be a foil to Chloe, and the writers had no idea what to do in terms of a personality, so they just dumped a bunch of extremely likable character traits onto her without thinking of how her character could come off. And like I said, she's a Mary Sue.

I'm not the only one who thinks this. I've seen a handful of posts on this very site calling Zoe a Mary Sue. In fact, I even asked another Tumblr user @anxresi​ to quote their take on Zoe being a Mary Sue, which I couldn't even top in terms of accuracy. They basically listed off five things that made Zoe a Mary Sue.

She has to have a ‘tragic backstory’ so all the other characters will fall in love with her. Usually within minutes, in the very first episode they’re introduced.

She has to have a supercute design so that the audience at home will fall in love with her. And if they don’t, they’re automatically dismissed as ‘haterz’ even if their objections are purely from a writing POV.

Her only flaw will be thinking too little of herself. “What, lil ol’ me as the Bee Miraculous holder? With my shyness, colorful shoes, chic beret and personalized pink strip in my hair? Gosh, who’d have thought it?”

The contrast to her half-sister will be a constant plot point, with Chloe always getting dumped on. “You see, kids? Bad things happen to bad people. But you see this super-sweet girl over here? She gets a free DAD. Instant FRIENDS. To star in her own MOVIE. The chance to be a SUPERHERO, even though she only arrived last week. Who cares if she has no depth, no personality and barely any reason for being in the show, apart from being a massive ‘Up Yours’ to all the Chloe fans out there?”

What about character development, Mr Generic Zag Guy? “Development? What’s that?! Zoe is already perfect as she is. The only ‘development’ she’ll receive is having her hair done in the first episode she’s introduced. Besides, That‘d’ word is banned here at Zag studios. Why do you think we abandoned Chloe’s stillborn arc so quickly? This is a KIDS show, why bother trying to create a complex character with more than one dimension?”

This is essentially who Zoe is. She's perfect, has no character flaws, has a cute design so the audience will love her already, and was designed only to replace Chloe as Queen Bee. That's all she is.

So the episode ends with Zoe feeling happy at all the new friends she made while we get one of the most blatant attempts of symbolism in the ending card I've ever seen.

See, look. While Marinette is happily talking with Zoe with the image of Ladybug next to them, Chloe is to the far left with an EVIL purple aura, showing how bad she is compared to how great Zoe is. Only a braindead moron would actually like Chloe over the super awesome and pretty Zoe!

I'll give my final thoughts on the episode in the next part where I analyze this plotline as a whole.

LINK TO “QUEEN BANANA” REVIEW

[citowon]

spring troupe and gender neutral s/o watch horror movies

about time i finally write for this blog... i was hit with the image of masumi watching a horror movie with his s/o, thought how lovely it would be if there was content of that, then realized i have that power now

word count: 1,935

tags: established relationship, non-detailed mentions of horror themes (gore, monsters, etc)

sakuya sakuma

🌸 when the topic of a horror movie date first comes up, he’s a bit scared. he’s only seen a couple, one of which was for mankai play research.

🌸 when it’s actually showing, though, he’s pretty calm! the anticipation was the worst part, and he somehow doesn’t get scared even during the most terrifying movie of the year. he’s great at reminding himself it’s just fictional in the end

🌸 vampires? not scary. aliens? he thinks they’re cute! gore? well, yeah, it’s unnerving at first but it’s all fake, and once he reminds himself of that he’s fine

🌸 he gets scared at the littlest things though. there might be a continuity error where a knife is in its holder on the counter in one shot and then removed the next, and no one in the movie acknowledges it nor is it supposed to mean anything but he can and will psych himself out thinking about just what moved it

🌸 king of predicting plot twists! he might be very good at spotting continuity errors, but he’s even better at picking out little bits of foreshadowing and putting together the mystery

🌸 gets spooked the most by jumpscares. every time he squeaks a bit (on really bad ones he might scream) and every time he always does the same embarrassed sigh afterwards and goes to squeeze your hand to calm himself

🌸 psychological horror is definitely the best pick for sakuya. he thinks a lot about what’ll happen next in the movie and loves to discuss about movies with you regardless of the genre, so with thought-provoking psychological films it fits him like a glove

🌸 and hey, if things ever get too intense he loves b-list horror movies! he thinks the bad acting is endearing and always finds something to compliment even with the trashiest, corniest flick

🌸 if you ever get uncomfortable, he might commentate in the movie and try to poke fun at it- i mean, the killer clown is kind of funny! look how bright and colorful it is compared to the rest of the set! he keeps his voice light and sunny so you have something comforting to concentrate on

masumi usui

🎧 he loves the idea of horror night. cuddling with you, holding you protectively as the suspense rises, stealing kisses to distract you from the monster and erase your fear...

🎧 he’s only seen a few horror movies in his life, less than the fingers he has on one hand, but whatever. it’s a movie. it’s not real. if he got too immersed he could just tell himself it’s fake and be done with it.

🎧 spoiler alert: he didn’t.

🎧 masumi did not, and i repeat, did NOT expect to get so invested??? even if you’re scared, he’s definitely the most terrified

🎧 that’s not to say he’ll show it. he’s doing everything to keep a neutral face, and you’ll probably assume he’s holding to you tighter during the scary parts like he’s protecting you.

🎧 (it’s actually because you’re the one [1] thing grounding him. you’re protecting him, not the other way around! in hindsight, he likes being cared for even when he thought he’d be the one spoiling you, not the other way around. he just wishes it didn’t have to be during such a scary movie, that’s all)

🎧 will take his fear to the grave... unless you ask him directly about it. please hold him and tell him the monsters aren’t real, even though he’s a heavy sleeper he will stay up until 3 am, his mind reminding him how creepy the movie was every time he’s about to drift off

🎧 so does not fuck with ghosts, if he didn’t believe in them before he certainly does now. the poor guy looks up how to ward away spirits and ends up carrying around a salt packet on him for the next two weeks

tsuzuru minagi

📖 tsuzuru’s not exactly a horror fan. he claims it’s brainless and pointless

📖 (admittedly he’s a little scared of them, but he still thinks they’re dependent on shock alone, and have zero rewatch value since the writing is more focused on in-the-moment spooks than actual plot.)

📖 he’ll roll his eyes and tease you a little but eventually he’ll go along with watching a horror movie

📖 to psych himself out of his fear tsuzuru decides to watch them critically and note what plot points to do (or more likely not to do) for future plays

📖 this works out for the beginning but by the middle of the movie he’s enraptured. he can’t tell if it’s actually good or if it’s a car wreck he can’t help but watch

📖 does the corny move where he yawns and wraps an arm around you, and you’d almost buy it from his earlier cynicism but then the killer shows their face and he tenses up like hell and you just know

📖 gets embarrassed every time he’s scared- he even turns pink, and gets even redder if you try to hold his hand or cuddle him closer (even though there’s nothing he’d want more after something that creepy)

📖 by the end he’s got a few new ideas that might go to autumn or winter troupe’s latest plays, and admits okay, fine, maybe horror isn’t so pointless after all

itaru chigasaki

🎮 screw movies, you’re playing horror games instead!

🎮 most of itaru’s horror games are single-player, so one of you takes the controller while the other sits next to the player, but itaru’ll drape his arms around you from behind in a back hug the entire time you play

🎮 he doesn’t really shut up. the entire time, he’s either cracking a joke or trying to freak you out more, if only so he doesn’t get in his head and overthink the creepy atmosphere

🎮 asshole only quiets down when the game gets tense, and then suddenly puts his hands around your shoulders or neck to scare you. regardless if you fall for it or not, he always laughs at himself and just-so-happens to break the tension as a scary cutscene plays

🎮 still commentates when he’s the player, but gasps or jumps even at small atmospheric scares

🎮 itaru definitely overthinks the game. he gets super cautious over tiny details and makes the missions way harder than they should be since he keeps overestimating the enemy line of sight and how noisy the avatar is

🎮 if you happen to be playing a co-op horror it’s a constant ��no u” battle over who should do the scariest tasks

🎮 “reader, we need to cleanse the room next. you should do it” “no, you should do it. you have the quartz item remember” “i can give it to you since you have the ghost ward” “the ghost ward doesn’t apply to this quest, besides, you’re better at this ghost attack quick time event than me” “no it does, and you’re more optimized” “i can just give the items to you-“ “no you should do it” “no you” “no you” “no you” “no y-”

🎮 you both lose

citron

🍋 citron loves horror movies! he thinks they’re... comforting?

🍋 turns out he’s only seen movies about cursed dolls and b-horror, which explains a lot- he loves dolls too much to be scared by them and he thinks b-list horror is hilarious- but he’ll still proudly proclaim he’s unflappable and swear to protect you from the bad guys

🍋 when you’re actually watching the movie you can’t tell if he’s faking his reactions or not. he’s very noisy

🍋 he gets scared enough during the gruesome and horrific scenes to hold you close and tight like a teddy bear, and during the worst of it he might muffle a scream by diving into the crook of your neck, obscuring his vision until the scene changes

🍋 and yet, he laughs at the next scene’s unrealism, and manages to poke enough fun at the movie that you giggle and his terror disappears, he loves your laugh way more than he can be afraid of monsters

🍋 can’t do gore for the life of him, but when it comes to the actual plot, he’s rather critical of characters acting dumb. he catches on to nonsensical writing quick, but usually asks you to clarify the plot holes before realizing that he found a loophole in the writing

🍋 whenever you’re scared and not even his goofy reactions and commentary can help, he plants a sweet kiss on your cheek, strokes your hair, and holds you close to his chest until the fear goes away. he’s surprisingly good at protecting you from the movie

🍋 after the movie he’ll say his country has a similar legend to the movie monsters, but he claims the legends are true in zafra, and zafrans have a very specific tradition to prevent the monsters from attacking them

🍋 the movie also gave citron the idea of creepily standing behind you silently until you turn around and get startled, or occasionally chanting in a strange, cultish language and pretending he didn’t say a thing, or making a doll with the same markings as the clown puppet from the movie...

🍋 citron continues to be even scarier than the actual horror movie, but can’t wait until the next horror night! maybe watching it was a bad idea after all...

chikage utsuki

🌙 chikage just doesn’t get the appeal of horror. it’s just a fake movie, why do people get so creeped out by terrible sfx and unrealistic monsters?

🌙 he’s seen scarier things than any werewolf pack, zombie outbreak, or witch coven can throw at him. if you insist on watching a scary movie, fine, he’ll be happy to let you sit on his lap, just don’t expect to creep him out as well, or else you’ll be sorely disappointed.

🌙 he analyzes the movie more than he watches it, but doesn’t speak up even though the fight scenes look pitiful. if this were real life, he’d sweep the whole brood of shambling monstrosities in record time and be back home in time for izumi’s curry

🌙 chikage runs his hands under your shirt whenever the monster’s on screen to scare you. it’s actually really creepy- his fingers are light and quick and always makes you flinch, even if you know it’s just your boyfriend

🌙 he’ll listen to your thoughts about the movie, but doesn’t have strong opinions himself. he thinks the scares are mediocre at best, even without considering his background, but won’t mention how unrealistic it was unless you mention it first.

🌙 psychological horror, however, is a whole different story

🌙 maybe chikage can’t get scared by generic spirit halloween monsters but once you introduce thought-provoking plot, questions and dilemmas, now he’s hooked

🌙 he really likes wondering if the protagonist is actually the good guy and making theories about the origins of the monsters and why they’re so destructive, even if he forgets about them once the movie’s over.

🌙 love love looooves the “the monsters were harmless creatures before humans dished out the first blow” trope. he knows how common it is, but there’s a lot of ways to go about it, especially on a subtextual level, and he just can’t get enough

🌙 the deeper the plot is, expect a longer conversation about the ins and outs of it. they get surprisingly thoughtful and introspective, even if chikage throws in a few bullshit stories related to the movie just to watch you squirm

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed Episode 12 second part

(Masterpost) (Other Canary Funsies) 

Warning: Spoilers for All 50 Episodes!

After locking Wei Wuxian into some comically large chains, Wen Chao has him thrown into the dungeon, with an unpleasant surprise.

This Fucking Dog

Being a fan of The Untamed involves occasional second-hand embarrassment, like when they fly on their swords, or the zombies all have the same wig, or a fight sequence moves slower than everybody’s granny. It's ok because each of these things is offset by excellence in acting, story, costumes, weapons, sets, etc.

Then there's this fucking dog. 

The department of questionable practical effects really outdid themselves with this thing. Just seeing this awful creation on screen gives me so much cringe squick I can barely look at it. But for you, dear readers, I FORCED MY EYEBALLS to watch the entire dog sequence OVER AND OVER. Then I applied some brightness adjustments and looked at it EVEN MORE. 

Let's get desensitized! I’m going all in on this monstrosity.

First, this dog does not ever move its body or its feet. Its legs are totally immobile. It appears to be made of a big sawhorse with a stick for the neck. The head swings up and down and side to side. That’s it.  

“Animatronic” is too generous of a term for this thing. The animatronics at Chucky Cheese learned to play musical instruments and host birthday parties decades ago. This dog cannot play an instrument and it has to wait for Wei Wuxian to walk over to it before it can attack him. 

When it falls over after Wen Ning K.O’s it, it’s like a chair falling over. It just topples to the side, legs sticking straight out.  

(more after the cut)

Next, It has a mouth full of teeth, which opens and closes. And it has drool the texture of Astroglide Extra-Thick Gel. But...no tongue.

Seriously you guys, it literally does not have a tongue. They just sculpted a little bump at the at the bottom of its mouth, despite dogs being known for, like, lolling their tongues out of their mouths at every opportunity.

Moving along, it has dull, lifeless eyes, and its eyelids are visibly disconnected from the rest of its head, like a doll that mechanically shuts its eyes when you lay it down to sleep.

Finally, its fur looks like a fucking muppet, and it has random shiny spots all around its eyes and lips. These are probably supposed to be body fluids of some kind, but they just look like someone was careless with the cra-z-glue.

Xiao Zhan gamely tries to act opposite this ridiculous fail prop, but there is nothing remotely scary about it.  

Here is Wei Wuxian being scared. I replaced the animatronic dog with a reversed clip of my dog Pepper asking for a piece of cheese, and I think it looks more convincing this way. 

Ok, let's be done with this stupid fucking dog. Wen Ning knocks it out, Wen Chao criticizes it in the morning, and nobody ever speaks of it again. 

Wei Wuxian is so mortified to have endured this farce that when Lan Wangji asks him, much later, “why are you afraid of dogs?” he does not say “don’t you remember that time I got chewed on by a giant animatronic dog at Wen Chao’s place?” but instead pretends that this never fucking happened. 

Wen Ning to the Rescue

For contrast, the next dungeon scene is a really touching and important encounter between Wen Ning and Wei Wuxian. 

Wen Ning comes and knocks out the creature, and gives Wei Wuxian medicine. 

Wen Ning is doing this in defiance of his clan and his sister, simply because Wei Wuxian is his friend. Yes, he feels indebted, but Wen Qing saved WWX’s life once, so the tally is already even. Wen Ning is just super attached to Wei Wuxian, and vice versa; WWX calls him Wen-Xiong in this scene. 

When Wen Ning explains how to use the medicine, Wei Wuxian changes the subject to ask how WN and his sister are doing. He is bleeding, chained up, high on adrenaline and fear, and what he really wants is to hear how his friends are doing. When Wen Ning talks about Wen Qing’s troubles, Wei Wuxian wishes she would accept help, instead of always going it alone. 

Wei Wuxian thanks Wen Ning formally, and tells him no words can express his gratitude. Whether this is a literally correct translation, the gratitude both of these young men feel toward each other transcends words. It will become a driving force in both of their lives as they save each other from increasingly awful situations. 

Wen Ning tells Wei Wuxian about the burning of Cloud Recesses....the burning of the half we never visit. It would suck to damage that exquisite set, so I’m ok with that production choice, but creates some cognitive dissonance when characters get upset about the fire. 

Wei Wuxian reacts to the news of Lan Wangji’s injury by punching the concrete floor of the dungeon, which is dumb but also highly relatable. 

After Wen Ning leaves, Wei Wuxian decides to save the medicine for Lan Wangji, who might not even need it, while WWX is bleeding right now and definitely needs it. No matter how bad things are for him personally, Wei Wuxian is always thinking about ways to help the people he loves, and constantly seeing his own needs as less important than everybody else’s. 

Breakfast Time

After his night of terror and maiming, Wei Wuxian emerges as chipper as ever. Almost like he is already an expert at hiding his trauma from the people close to him. 

Lan Wangji gives him a careful look, taking in the sight of his ripped clothes and bloody neck and hands. 

Jiang Cheng is angry at Wei Wuxian for joking about his injuries, so he shoves him, potentially causing more injuries. 

Wei Wuxian laughs off the signs of torture and attempted murder and everyone goes along with it. Nobody knows what happened to him other than "dungeon" and what he looks like right now, and they’re all just like, okey dokey, I guess you’re fine.  

He’ll carefully laugh off his months in the burial mounds in the same way, later, and Jiang Cheng will accept it nearly as readily as he accepts this. But by that time Lan Wangji will see right through him.

Nie Huaisang mentions the Lan Clan in the course of discussing breakfast, and then everyone pauses awkwardly because they know that mentioning this will make Lan Wangji think about the recent attack on his home and the deaths of many of his fellow disciples. Whereas if nobody had mentioned it, he totally wouldn't think about it. That's how grief works, right?

Insult to Injury

Wen Chao decides to spend some time gloating about battles and insulting people's families, which he does with Wen Qing standing behind his eyeline so that she can warn Wei Wuxian not to let his brother go off. 

Jiang Cheng is not going to let anybody who isn't his mother insult his father like that, but in a reversal of their normal roles, Wei Wuxian restrains him and helps keep him from doing something rash.

Monster Hunting

Wen Chao makes everyone read out loud until Nie Huaisang wisely faints and gets carried off. Then he gathers everyone for a monster hunt.  It's unclear why he wants to go monster hunting but he sure does, and bringing the hostages along might make them all die, which would be a nice bonus.

The cultivators wander around en masse in a small section of forest, thoroughly covering every inch of it. This is a great way to hunt for a dead body but not so good for living prey. 

Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng stand around like bitchy queens at a dance club, talking smack about Wen Chao and his girlfriend. 

Wei Wuxian brings out a salty phrase and Jiang Cheng wonders what websites he's been going to. 

Dude. Lighten up.

Leave that Boy Alone

Wei Wuxian notices Lan Wangji struggling, and now that he knows the backstory, he's determined to help. Jiang Cheng is determined to stop him.

This is, once again, the fundamental disagreement between the brothers, and it's never going to be solvable. Jiang Cheng's specific dislike of Lan Wangji may be rooted in jealousy, but his belief in not helping outsiders runs a lot deeper than that.

For Wei Wuxian, there is no such thing as having helped enough. If someone is his friend, he will never stop helping them, and he has a lot of friends, and makes new ones wherever he goes. He's always going to be giving something of himself, to the detriment of any conflicting obligations. 

Jiang Cheng tells him that Lan Wangji won't accept his help, and Wei Wuxian says that's not the point. 

What other people think, want, say, or do, is not going to have any effect on whether Wei Wuxian does what he feels is right. This is a bit of a problem where a person's right to self-determination conflicts with Wei Wuxian's need to help them, as Jiang Cheng will eventually discover.

Jiang Cheng's least effective argument is the one he relies on most often when they disagree: other people's problems are not our responsibility. He's saying this to an orphan who was eating trash and stealing scraps from dogs before Jiang Fengmian came into his life. 

Jiang Cheng doesn’t seem to realize the underlying logic of this argument. If it's wrong for Wei Wuxian to help the people he cares about, it was also wrong for Jiang Fengmian to help Wei Wuxian. Jiang Cheng loves Wei Wuxian and would willingly die for him, but he, like his mother, rejects the philosophy that brought them together in the first place.  

Wei Wuxian walks away from an upset and shocked Jiang Cheng to offer a piggyback ride to Lan Wangji.

...who won't accept it, but who will remember the offer forever.

Writing prompt: Thoughts of an animatronic dog

Soundtrack:  Five Nights at Freddy’s by The Living Tombstone

[dontshootmespence]

Home Again

Summary: Spencer and Luke are happily married when the world goes to shit. In the chaos, they’re separated. After years, each one presumes the other dead. Until one day.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Luke Alvez

Word Count: 3,564

Warning: Zombie apocalypse shit. Character deaths. 

A/N: This fulfills my apocalypse au square for @cmbingo​. 

Inside their mid-size apartment, Luke dances to his favorite music as he moves about the kitchen, getting dinner ready for when Spencer comes home. A medical researcher’s work was never really done, but in the years since they’d gotten married, Spencer made a commitment to be home by every night at 6PM unless they discussed otherwise. 

Turning on the nightly news, Luke saw what looked like a pretty severe car accident on the road that Spencer normally took on the way home. He pulled out his phone and dialed, hoping to give his husband a head’s up about the driving conditions, but it went straight to voicemail. “Hey, Spence, it’s me. I mean, of course it’s me,” he laughed. “But anyway, I’m working on dinner now and I just saw the news. There’s a big accident on I-275 so you might want to take another way home if you can. I’ll see you in a little bit. Love you.”

As Luke slipped the chicken into the pot, he heard what sounded like another car wreck and ran to the window, sticking his head out to see a car on its side and one man running clumsily after another. A knock at the door distracted him from the damage on the street below. 

“Luke, it’s Steven. Open up.”

Steven was their neighbor and a college student. They rarely ever spoke. “Steven, what’s wrong?”

“There’s something wrong, man. People are going crazy out there. They’re attacking each other and...and eating each other. It’s like there are...”

Luke couldn’t help but laugh. “Do not say zombies. There’s no such thing, kid.”

Swallowing the lump in his throat, Steven insisted. “Something is happening. If you know what’s good for you, you’ll pack up some essentials and get moving. Apparently, it started at the Recovered Exploration Lab downtown and people, zombies, whatever they are, they’re headed this way. I just wanted to give you a heads up.”

Steven sped down the stairs in a panic, leaving Luke’s focus to drift back to the television. “We’re here just above Recovered Exploration Lab where the breakout of what looks like zombies seems to have started,” the news anchor started. “On the ground, people are ripping and tearing and eating each other in what seems to be a real-life apocalypse, folks. At this time we don’t know what caused it, but we can assume that the staff at Recovered Exploration have been keeping secrets. This is WLVW Channel 2 News. Back to you in the studio.”

Luke couldn’t believe what he was hearing and ran back to the window to see even more people than before ambling down the street. Cursing under his breath, he pulled out his phone again and dialed Spencer again. “Spence, have you heard what’s on the news? Are they talking about it on the radio? They’re saying it’s a real life zombie apocalypse out there and I’m, I’m, I’m, uh, looking out the window and people are attacking each other. There’s a swarm of people heading toward the apartment so I’m grabbing some essentials for us. Meet me at our diner okay? Then we can figure out what to do. Be safe, Spence. I love you.”

Running into their bedroom, Luke grabbed the biggest backpack he could find and anything he thought they might need. Spare clothes, toiletries, canned food, a can opener, toilet paper, some sharp knives and his guns from work. “What else?” He spoke into the empty room. On the wall hung their favorite picture from their wedding. He and Spencer wore matching tuxes and walked hand in hand along a lit-up, tree-lined path. Lost in thought, the commotion brought him back. He stuffed the picture into the backpack and ran downstairs, hoping that this was all a dream.

----

Having heard both of Luke’s messages, Spencer took an alternative route home, but unfortunately, he ran into another accident, slamming on the brakes as two cars crashed into stopped cars in front of them. With traffic at a standstill, he pulled his phone out and tried to call Luke. Obviously, there had to be another explanation for what was happening. 

As he was about to try calling for a second time, he saw someone in the wreckage ahead, who he’d previously assumed to be dead, jerk back to life. Slowly, she go up from the ground and shuffled toward an office that had his back turned. When an ear-shattering scream resounded through the air, Spencer dropped his phone. She wasn’t the only one.

A man from a nearby car knocked on Spencer’s window. “Buddy, we need to get out of here. You have anything that might help?” 

“Like what?” Spencer asked, voice quivering as he picked up his phone from the car floor and shoved it back in his pocket. Quickly, he searched the car for anything that might be helpful. His keys.

“Anything in the trunk?” The man asked, grabbing Spencer’s arm and yanking him away from the incoming crowd. “We need to move now.” 

His mind had blanked. After grabbing the emergency preparedness bag from the trunk of the car that Luke insisted he have, he and the unnamed man ran over the highway barrier and away from the traffic. “I need to get to the diner on Jones and Washington,” Spencer said. “Do you know it? My husband said to meet him there.”

Staring back into the growing see of screaming and ambling bodies, the man replied. “I don’t think you’re going that way, kid.”

----

Stumbling down into the street they lived on, Luke looked around in horror. He ran. He ran as hard and as fast as his body would allow, staying clear of any of the infected like his life depended on it. Right now, it did. 

Luke wavered between walking and running in the general direction of the diner he knew so well. For five years, every Friday, he and Spencer would head there for a greasy burger and fries and some of the best milkshakes either of them had ever tasted. 

The farther he traveled from the apartment, the less insanity he seemed to encounter, but still, his heart beat with reckless abandon as he peered around every corner. If whatever this was didn’t get resolved soon, every street, every city, every state would be something to fear. No longer would he and Spencer be able to go to the local park and bask in the sun. No more walks on the beach. No more calm and colorful sunsets. “You’re getting ahead of yourself,” he muttered to himself. “Just get to the diner.”

Using landmarks to guide his way (so that he could keep his phone on and pray for a call from Spencer), he crossed what he believed was the halfway point between the apartment and the restaurant. They now lived in a world where people ate each other and rose from the dead, but it was the groups of human beings taking this whole situation as a free for all that he had to avoid most of all. 

As he hurriedly turned the corner, Luke bumped into a group of nervous but determined young adults. The youngest couldn’t have been 16 and the oldest topped 25 at the most. By the looks of the straggling adults, most of them had already lost someone or taken this new world as an excuse to ditch their families and fend for themselves. The most self-assured of the bunch stepped in toward Luke and looked at his bag. “Seems like you’re well stocked.”

“For a couple days,” he replied, carefully taking a small step backward. “For my spouse and I until this whole thing blows over.” He spoke the words, but something told him ‘this whole thing’ wasn’t going to be over anytime soon. 

With each step Luke took back, the young man stepped forward and tried to yank the bag from his grasp. “Sorry, kiddo. That ain’t happening.” Before the other man could swing his gun from his back and into his hand, Luke had his pulled and aimed. “Don’t. I don’t wanna hurt people. You walk away. I’ll walk away and we’ll pretend this never happened.”

The next moments passed by in a blur - kids running, bullets flying. Luke didn’t glance back, running away from the screams and toward the diner with tears in his eyes. He just shot a kid. A kid who was just trying to survive in whatever the hell this new world was. 

----

Days passed before Spencer and his party of misfits arrived at the diner. Jim was the man that shook him to reality. On the way they’d also run into a single mother named Avery and her 3-year-old son, Chase, who were being harassed by a couple of guys who just didn’t want to take no for an answer. Although they tried to resolve things peacefully, Jim killed the one that pulled a gun on him and the other ran away. From there, they all went to Jim’s former precinct and grabbed whatever guns they could find. Unlike Luke, Spencer wasn’t used to holding guns, but he was going to have to get accustomed quickly.

Normally, the diner looked reminiscent of the 50s. Crisp black and white checkered floors, red leather seats, clean white tables and chrome chairs at similarly colored bar-tops. Now there were skid marks on the floors, dinged counters and bits of food all over the floor. The kitchen had already been ransacked so very little decent food was left, but they stocked up on what they could and waited. 

Nearly a week went by before Jim insisted they leave. “I know your husband was going to meet you here, Spencer, but if we stay any longer we’re putting ourselves in danger. We don’t wanna use all our gunpower to defend this place when we can’t stay here.”

Spencer knew he was right, but the thought of leaving hurt his heart. “I’m never going to see my husband again, am I, Jim?”

The older man just looked at him sadly, resting his hand on Spencer’s shoulder. “Call him. You’ve still got a little power left. Leave a message. And hope for the best. I’ll give you a minute before we head out.” 

Spencer thanked him softly and went into the back room before pulling out the phone. Shakily, he dialed Luke one more time. “Hey, babe. I’ve been at the diner for almost a week. I don’t know what happened to you...or,” his voice broke, “or if you’re even still alive, but if you are, I’m headed toward my mother’s nursing home. I need to see if she’s okay. I have no idea if we’re ever going to see each other again. I hope we are. But if we aren’t, I need you know that the years we’ve been together, the years we’ve been married, they’ve been the best and happiest of my life. Studying what I study, it can suck the life out of you, but seeing you in the mornings, the sun shining on your face, it gave me that little push I needed to go do what I do. You changed my life, Luke. I love you so much. If you’re out there, and you can’t get to me, just know that, I love you with everything I have.”

Quickly, he ended the call and shoved the phone back in his pocket before breaking down sobbing. He allowed himself a few minutes and then met Jim, Avery and Chase outside. They’d all agreed to head in the direction of his mother’s nursing home. Spencer prayed that Luke and his mother were still alive. And safe.

----

After shooting the kid, Luke ran into a building a melted down. Sure, he’d had to shoot people before. He’d killed people before. But this was different. This was practically a kid whose only crime was trying to look out for the group he was with. Between dodging zombies and dodging other people, it took Luke almost two full weeks to get to the diner, but by the time he arrived, if Spencer had been there, he was gone. 

Despite the possibility of nearby zombies or walkers or whatever he’d heard people calling them, Luke screamed at the top of his lungs and lost it. Without finding him here, there was no guarantee that they were ever going to see each other again. In his search for any salvageable supplies, he came across random papers, broken glass, ripped bandages - but nothing of use. 

When he glanced down at the floor, he saw Spencer’s signature and hurriedly picked it up, but the other pieces of whatever note he left were too ripped up and dirty and stepped on for him to make out what it said. As his fingers slid over his husband’s name, a tear fell from his eye. If Spencer was still alive, he was likely headed in the direction his mother lived. 

“Hello?” A small voice broke Luke from his train of thought. He spun around, his hand on the gun in his holster. “Please don’t hurt me,” the girl said. Dirt and dried blood covered her face and her eyes conveyed a lifetime of hurt. “Please.”

Luke lowered his gun. “How old are you?”

“Fourteen.”

Luisa had been right in the eye of the storm at the start of this whole thing weeks earlier. “My papa died trying to save my mama. And then she was bitten trying to save my sister and I. She saved me, but it was too late for Josephine. My mother lost too much blood. She fell asleep and never woke up and I had to- I had to put her out of her misery. I’m all alone.”

“Not anymore, kiddo. “You’ll stay with me.”

“Thank you - “

“Luke.”

“Thank you, Luke.”

----

The weeks that followed put Spencer’s band of misfits went through the ringer. After detouring around a group of people that would’ve outnumbered them three to one had they decided they wanted trouble, they had to fight their way through a hoard of walkers. Though they had few weapons, they managed, but not without Jim being bitten. 

“Kid, you know without a medic around this tourniquet is just stopping the inevitable. The bastard nicked my brachial artery,” Jim said, heavily drawing in each breath as it came to him. “You’ve got to take the weapons and keep those two safe for as long as you can. Maybe find your husband again.”

Spencer swallowed the lump in his throat. “I could go find-”

“No way. There’s a hoard at our backs and only Lord knows what up ahead. I won’t have you risking that for me.”

Over and over again, Spencer tried to reason with him, but in a way Jim was right. He had no idea what was up ahead and even if he found a medic there was no guarantee that he’d get back in time to save Jim. “I’m sorry,” Spencer said, placing a handgun in his palm. “I really am.”

“I know, kid. I have you find your husband again. Now get going.”

Once Spencer grabbed the weapons Jim had, he gathered up Avery and Chase and headed out into the unknown. A gunshot rang out and the crows fled into the sky. Hope was waning fast.

----

On their way to Diana’s nursing home, Spencer, Avery and Chase faced no further challenges. As soon as they detected voices, they headed away from them, preferring to stay in their small group of three than risk bringing other people into their ranks. They crossed the occasional zombie, but they were quickly dispatched.

Finally, they reached Diana’s home, but they were too late. Spencer found her alive, but too bloodied and bruised to move. “Mom, I’ll find someone. I won’t let you die,” Spencer said softly as he cried. “I can find someone to help and we can get you out of here.”

Diana was nothing if not a realist. “I’m going to die, Spencer. Soon probably. I just hope I can keep my wits about me until the sleep sets in. How’s Luke? Where is he? Is he-?”

“I don’t know,” Spencer sobbed. “You really want to talk about my life right now?’

“Yes. When I first saw this on the news, I thought I was having a nightmare, but it’s real and it’s unreal and I just want a sense of normalcy.”

Spencer radioed Avery to tell her where he was before curling in next to his mother. “I was on my way home from work when this all started. Luke was home. I-I haven’t seen him since and I don’t think I’m ever going to see him again. Mom, I’m so scared of being alone.”

“You’ll find him again,” Diana said weakly. 

“How do you know?”

“A mother knows. Remember?”

Spencer grabbed her hand and started reading the nearest book he could find. “Spencer...” she said, whisper soft. “It’s time for me to go to sleep.”

“No, mom, just a little bit longer.”

“Promise me something.”

“Anything.”

Diana fought for each breath. “Don’t let me turn into one of those things.”

Spencer choked out a sob. “I won’t.”

“And stay hopeful.” 

He promised he would, though he wasn’t sure it was a promise he could keep. “Mom?”

Nothing.

Before she could come back, he took a small gun out of his pocket, aimed, and fired. “I’ll try, Mom.”

----

Days passed into weeks passed into months passed into years. In a world changed, it changed those within in. Luke, once a confident and self-assured government agent, turned inward, going from one “safe haven” to another and sheltering himself and Luisa until their hideaway was discovered and they needed to move on, never once fighting for a place to call a makeshift home.

Through the years he lost himself, finding that instead of helping others, he did only what he had to do for he and Luisa to survive, never once taking a life, only dispatching zombies when need be. 

On the other hand, Spencer found himself hardening against the world. More than a year after everything began, Avery was overtaken by a hoard they passed, shoving Chase out of the crowd and toward Spencer. With her last breaths, she begged Spencer to take care of her son. Five years later, he and the almost nine-year-old boy headed a group of nearly 50 people, though numbers dwindled and rose from month to month. 

Spencer became a leader, but he confided in no one, killed if it was necessary to defend his “home”, and rarely spoke, shutting down in the face of any emotional connection. To connect was to lose, and he had lost enough. 

“Daniel and Alexa, you’ll accompany me into town for some supplies.” In addition to defending the makeshift community they’d developed, Spencer always sent out scouts to ensure that no one touched the supplies in surrounding towns. Less-looted stores were low in number and eventually he would need to conduct another reconnaissance mission to find supplies, but for now they would survive. “We leave within the hour.”

Smiles were few and far between, for Spencer more than most. However, the little boy he’d ended up raising as his son brought him a sliver of joy, along with his memories of Luke. They coaxed him to sleep at night and in the morning, he used them to make it through the day. “Chase, you know I love you, right?”

“I do, Spencer. Be careful okay? I can’t lose you.”

“I’ll be back.” He never promised, knowing more than most that sometimes the world was cruel. “Be good for Sandra.”

Though he was born before the world went to shit, Chase had essentially grown up in this new world. He was disciplined and trustworthy and more an adult than any almost nine-year-old boy should ever have to be.

On the way to gather supplies, Spencer zoned out, only gathering little bits of the conversation going on behind him. Both Daniel and Alexa had lost spouses at the start of the apocalypse and something told Spencer they were seeking comfort in one another now that they were “safe.” Funny how the meaning of a word could change in such a short amount of time.

While out for supplies, Spencer had insisted that no one go anywhere alone, so the three entered the hardware store in search of anything they could use as a weapon. As he gathered ropes and zip ties and wrenches into his supply bag, he heard Alexa and Daniel call for him. “Boss!”

Spencer approached the two, their guns raised and ready to fire. In the line of sight was a young woman, sheltered by a man. He closed his eyes and begged the universe for this not to be a joke, his mind playing tricks on him. When Spencer opened his eyes, he remained. “Luke?”

He smiled and immediately broke into tears. “Spence? You’re, you’re-”

Pushing past Daniel and Alexa, Spencer ran into Luke’s arms on the verge of tears, pressing his lips to his husband’s for the first time in nearly seven years. “I’m alive. And you’re here. How are you here?”

“Because I’m a different person. You?”

“Me too,” Spencer said sadly. “Everything’s changed. Except what I feel for you. I’m finally home again.”

[knjoodles]

learn to love; jungkook | 04

pairing: teacher!jungkook x singleparent!reader

genre: angst, fluff

word count: 3.5K

summary: raising your daughter alone while simultaneously watching your ex-husband live the life of his dreams away from the two of you hurts. badly. it hurts a little less, though, when you find an unlikely friend while looking for help.

lowercase intended.

psst! this chapter is a game-changer AND has a character named after one of my followers! i hope she sees it and enjoys it. 💞

01 | 02 | 03 

   your alarm clock woke you, it’s piercing siren startling your eyes wide. groaning and fluttering your eyes to adjust to the sudden morning rays warming your somnolent face, you glared at the flashing red numbers across from you, reading a proud eight a.m. “fuck,” you mumbled, sinking your head into your pillow. your head pounded sparingly as you buried your head further, your attempt at drowning out the gentle pain failing.

    what had happened last night? nothing devastating. you're not one to irrationally act out; you always think about seyoung first. the last thing you can recall is throwing your shoes off and bag to the floor and essentially passing out on your bed after attending a team dinner. your days never seem to end, it just feels as though you have small pockets of time to breathe in between your busy schedule. when your five-minute break is up, though, it's back to work.

    you slowly arose from your cozy, welcoming bed and stared at the pillow sitting next to you, one that you'd clung to all night judging from its evident crumpled form in comparison to the other pillows sprawled across your bed. ouch. it sits where hoseok would lay.

    shaking your head to ensure you wouldn't have any regressive thoughts at eight in the morning, you pulled your comforter back, swinging your legs across the bed and perching comfortably on its edge. gazing at your feet, you sighed quietly, thanking the heavens it was saturday but dually cursing it for your support group session being today. you hadn't told anyone about it, not even sooyoung. this was for you, and you alone. you trudged from your bed to the master bathroom, scrubbing your teeth.

   it was at this moment that the sweet aroma of a saturday morning breakfast wafted from your kitchen to your bedroom. you inhaled it peacefully, the fragrance calming you and clearing your mind. you finally left your bedroom, shuffling towards your kitchen and living room. you silently apologized to the heavens for scolding it about the support group and thanked it once more, being reminded that you wouldn't know what to do half the time without sooyoung.

    "morning!" a voice sang from your kitchen. "i see the zombie finally decided to rise from sleep?" it chuckled, the sound of what seemed like waffles sizzling. your stomach growled at the thought of biting into one and you returned sooyoung's laugh, the patter of your daughter's feet against the tiled floor growing louder as she ran towards you. "seyoung, be careful! i don't want you slipping!"

    "it's okay, sooyoung auntie!" your daughter assured, her smaller frame finally finding you. "mom!" she giggled excitedly as she wrapped her arms around your waist, tugging affectionately. "you're finally awake!" she moaned, pulling on your large cotton shirt. "you know, i thought you died! so i called sooyoung auntie, and she told me you were alive. but i didn't believe her, so i asked her to prove it! and she told me she couldn't prove it this early in the morning. it wasn't even that early!"

    "seyoung-ah, what part of four in the morning isn't early to you?" sooyoung complained, her voice ringing through your home, body still not in view. peeking her head past a pillar separating the three of you, she scowled, annoyed, slapping another waffle onto a stack on a plate. "i was busy dreaming my dreams and this little one wakes me from my beauty sleep! at four in the morning! seyoung, if i didn't love you so much, who knows what i'd do!" she groaned. you and your daughter chuckled in unison, her small hand dragging you to the table to sit with her and sooyoung.

    "this is the first time i've made blueberry waffles, so don't expect a master chef level plate," sooyoung grinned as she placed the large pile of waffles in the middle of the table. "seyoung was okay with normal waffles up until she spotted the blueberries in the fridge. after that, she wouldn't stop tormenting me to add them in!" she joked, sitting down across from you.

    "torment?!" seyoung squealed, eyes wide, a smile cracking across her cheeks. "all i wanted was some pancakes, auntie!" she pat the table playfully, sooyoung pinching her cheek lovingly. "and, you said yes!"

    "and, i said yes," sooyoung repeated, looking over at you. "you both know i can't say no to seyoung! it's like refusing to eat a feast in front of you after you haven't eaten for days. what do you expect me to do? starve?" she jested, earning an eye roll and a grin from you. no one failed to make you laugh like your very dramatic sooyoung.

    "yeah, yeah." you bantered, serving yourself two warm pancakes. "gosh, sooyoung, these smell incredible," you gushed as you cut a piece swiftly, wanting to savor it immediately. it instantly melted in your mouth, the flavor of the warm fruit bursting into your mouth. you smiled brightly, chewing vigorously and holding up a cheerful thumbs-up. your daughter did the same, earning a giggle from sooyoung as she studied the two of you.

    "you guys look exactly alike," she murmured as she took a portion of waffle into her mouth, nibbling contentedly. swallowing, she continued, "just the same. it's like someone copy-paste in real life."

    seyoung turned to you, her face crinkled into a joyous grin. she placed her petite hand on top of yours, squeezing it tenderly. "i'm pretty, just like her! my mom is the prettiest lady in the world."

    "that she is!" sooyoung chimed in agreement, pointing her fork with a half-eaten chunk of waffle on it at seyoung. "no one can compare, except for me. i humbly accept second place, madam (y/n)." she bowed teasingly.

    "no, seyoung, you're the prettiest! and what about yebin? she's pretty too, right?" as much as you hated mentioning yebin, you knew you had to encourage seyoung to form a relationship with her 'step-mom'. you had to be the bigger person and you have to ignore the urge to scream at her every time you see her face. that's what being an adult is. hiding your feelings and pretending that you're generally okay.

    "eh," seyoung dragged, filling her mouth with a large piece of waffle. "not as pretty as you," she assured between chews. "yebin's scary when she takes off her makeup." her unintentional attack on yebin prompted sooyoung to sputter in amusement, bursting into laughter.

    "you're even starting to talk like your mom!" sooyoung exclaimed, resting her head on the table to mask her cackling. "i can't," she gasped, throwing her head back and covering her mouth. "you guys are getting more and more alike every day!"

    you smiled at your excited daughter, who was now drawing a large smiley face using maple syrup on her plate. admiring your best friend cackling in front of you and your daughter being undeniably herself, you sat contempt, knowing life was good for the time being.

    "next time?" sooyoung started as she slipped on her shoes, her purse dangling from her shoulder. "call me. if you ever need an extra hand around here, i'll come as soon as i can. promise you'll call?"

    "promise." you reassured, nodding politely. seyoung hovered behind you waving to her beloved aunt as she departed. "thanks for the breakfast and lunch, soo. you know i couldn't have done it without you." you dart your head around to spot your daughter, finding her peering behind your leg. "seyoung, say bye to sooyoung!"

    "bye, sooyoung auntie! come back soon! i want to make chocolate pancakes next!" seyoung called as sooyoung walked to her uber. "please come back!" seyoung repeated hesitantly, "i won't wake you up early again!"

    "good." sooyoung nodded, climbing into the passenger seat. "i'll see you monday, (y/n)! enjoy your weekend." sooyoung closed the door of the car and the uber sped off, you and your daughter lingering in your front lawn until she was out of sight.

    "what are we gonna do today, mommy?" seyoung turned to you, eyes full of curiosity.

    "well, i wanted to keep it a surprise, but i may or may not have scheduled a sleepover for you and ailee!" you exclaimed, grabbing your daughter's hands excitedly.

    "a sleepover?!" she squeaked, ecstatic as ever. "a sleepover with ailee!" seyoung jumped up and down, her pigtails swaying. "thank you, mommy, thank you!" she followed you inside, slipping off her sandals. you glanced at the clock, noting that it was currently around two o'clock.

    "ailee's mom expects us at four, so go and get ready! i'll drop you off." you smiled, leading her towards her bathroom.

    "you're not staying? even for a little bit?" seyoung turned, pouting. "why? are you not friends with ailee's mom?"

    "no, no, ailee's mom and i are still friends! mommy just has a lot of work to do." you reasoned, crouching down to eye-level with your daughter. "i wish i could stay, baby, but duty calls!"

    "okay," she replied half-dejectedly, waddling into her room to fetch her clothes to shower. you felt relieved your daughter hadn't tried to pry. you were just getting help for the two of you.

    seyoung, excited as ever to finally have reached ailee's house, practically leaped out of her car seat and beelined towards the door. you dashed after her, finding it difficult to keep track of locking your car and your wild daughter all at once. "seyoung-ah!" you called sternly, making her almost immediately stop and apologize profusely. after assuring her that she didn't make any large mistake, you took her by the hand and led her to the front door, making sure she walked confidently next to you — a tip you'd read in a parenting journal.

    the door swung open as excited squeals sounded from either side, ailee and seyoung basically grabbing each other to hug tightly. chuckling at the two running off to play, seyoung's backpack still in your hand, you glanced at ailee's mother, mai. "they're really excited, huh?" she exclaimed, watching them clamber up the stairs. "here, let me take that," she offered.

    "of course!" you replied, placing the bag in her hand. "i can't thank you enough for taking seyoung in today. i would've called her nanny, but today was so busy, and —"

    "it's no issue," mai interrupted, smiling assuringly. "we all know how hard you work. and after you alone juggled both of our kids after my husband's accident, well," she turned, making sure your kids weren't there. "it's the least i could do. do you want to come in? i can get some coffee going,"

    "i'd love to, but i can't," you explained. "i've got a meeting of sorts to get to soon. i'll pick seyoung up around ten tomorrow?" you asked, adjusting the sleeve of your sweater.

    "that works perfectly. call me if there's anything important!" she called, waving to you as you departed towards your car.

    "likewise!" you responded, waving politely and climbing into your car, waiting until their front door shut. why did you always find yourself on the verge of losing it in this exact position? in front of mai's house, in your car, right in front of the wheel. and, mimicking the way you always react to these situations, you rubbed the leather of your steering wheel, stopping yourself from resting your forehead against the horn and letting it ring until you felt satisfied. it was time to go to that potential shitshow of a support group, and you didn't know how to feel. pain? fear?

    you thought your divorce from hoseok would be the worst you've ever felt. and granted, it partially was, but at least you were sure of yourself. sure that you didn't want anything to do with this anymore, regardless of how much you loved him. but now? you didn't even know if you wanted this. the worst feeling to you was clear now; it was uncertainty, because uncertainty can corrode you and all your confidence in ways nothing else can.

    and, again mimicking the way you always react to these situations, you pressed the gas and drove, preparing yourself for both the worst and the best.

    the community center was cold. that was your first thought.

    dozens of people filed into the large auditorium, all trying to catch a glimpse of the one directory they offered to guide attendees to their respective support groups. after standing on your toes for what felt like hours, you finally read, 'divorcees and widow(er)s support group, room 613'. you found your place to go, but did you really want to walk into that room?

    there that uncertainty went again, eating away at your confidence like a parasite.

    you have to go, you reasoned to yourself it's not just for you, it's for seyoung. she'll catch on to what's going on eventually, you can't let her see you weak! with the reminder of seyoung fresh in your mind, you took the elevator to the sixth floor and searched thoroughly for room 613.

    "excuse me?" a voice asked from behind you, startling you. "are you lost? 'cause i am, too."

    you snorted at their comment, turning around to face them fully. a tall, muscular man stood in front of you, voice deep, hair slicked back handsomely. "oh," you muttered, stepping back to make eye contact more comfortably. "yeah, you could say i'm lost," you nodded, darting your head to either side of the hallway. "i'm looking for room 613. do you know where that is?"

    "613? i'm headed there myself," he replied awkwardly. the two of you stood together silently, both not knowing what to say in panicked silence. "i, uh, i'm park chanyeol." he introduced himself bluntly, offering his hand.

    hesitating, you finally took his hand, shaking it firmly, the way you do with customers or partners. "i'm (y/n) (l/n)." you responded.

    "(y/n) (l/n)," he repeated, looking towards the ceiling. "that sounds familiar, do i know you?"

    you cringed internally. one of the reasons you became a producer was to avoid being recognized in public, to avoid the constant attention, to avoid the all-eyes-on-you treatment artists are forced to undergo. so, as a result, when someone does recognize your name, you get a sudden urge to become a hermit. "long story short, i'm a producer."

    "ah, i see." chanyeol replied, hearing the hint of apprehension in your voice. "well, (y/n) (l/n), we're in the same boat, so let's find the room together." thankful he understood your tone, you set off with chanyeol, trekking across the hallway to find the infamous room 613. to your annoyance and surprise, the room seemed to be hidden away from the rest of the hallway, and out of numerical order.

    chanyeol opened the door for you and let the both of you in. room 613 was larger than what you expected; the room seemed to be at least three times as big as the other rooms, with many people filling up seats and talking amongst themselves. you didn't expect this many people to ever show up to a support group, but you stood corrected. not knowing where to go, you glanced at chanyeol, who motioned for the two of you to head over to the tables supervisors had set up, which were lined with water and general snacks.

    pouring two plastic cups of water for the both of you, you looked again at chanyeol, who was tapping his foot on the floor, glancing at the clock restlessly. "hey," you started, immediately getting his full attention. "tell me about yourself, chanyeol."

        a small silence between the two of you.

    "but, only if you're comfortable!" you stammered, hoping, praying that you didn't push any buttons within the first hour of meeting someone.

    he laughed at your uneasiness, dimples revealing themselves. "it's no big deal. uh, my wife and i recently divorced after i caught her cheating on me. is this it? is this the sharing thing they wanted us to do?"

    you chuckled, amused. "yeah, i think it is. and, it's a small world; the exact thing happened to me, but with my husband. do you have any kids? i have a daughter."

    "thankfully no," chanyeol answered, now visibly more comfortable. "we were planning on it, but that was before she cheated on me,"

    you nodded, understanding where he's coming from. you never told hoseok, but you'd always wanted to have a son with him alongside seyoung. and, like chanyeol, you never got there because of someone else's mistake. "i'm sorry you had to go through that." you sympathized.

    "i just need this to finally get over everything. i'm sorry you had to go through that too, especially because you have a daughter," he stated, caressing the back of his neck. "hey, if you can do it, so can i, right?"

    "yeah. and if you can do it, so can i." you repeated, smiling at him. the two of you shared a laugh at your new paired saying as the facilitator called everyone to the circle of chairs in the middle of the room, asking everyone to take a seat. you and chanyeol sat side-by-side, the both of you somewhat relieved that you weren't in this completely alone. at least there was someone who gets how you're feeling and just how painful it can be.

    "hi, everyone!" the facilitator's voice echoed through the room, loud, clear, and confident. "my name is lee chaerin, and i'll be the 'leader', if you will, of today's support group! a reminder, in case some of you are unsure, this is the divorcee, widow, and widower support group. if you're in the wrong room, please consult the new directory outside!" she announced. as a few people shuffled quietly out of the room to find their place elsewhere, she clasped her hands together. "again, my name is lee chaerin. i'm a trained psychologist and have been studying psychology for nearly twelve years at this point. cool, huh? my hope for this support group is that i help all of you heal, even if it's just a little. i want to make sure that all of you are okay, and can help each other while helping yourself!" she rested her hands on her hips and smiled, sighing contentedly. "i know that no one really wants to do this, but it's important. let's all go around the room and introduce ourselves, what we do, what happened, and what you hope to gain from this support group! after this, we'll split into groups to share our in detail stories and learn from each other. sounds like a plan? great."

    that type of introduction was a nightmare in reality. ever since you were ten you despised introducing yourself that way, and today, once married with a daughter, you feel the same way. some things never change.

    you weren't allowed to reach for your phone for the next two hours. they say that phones ruin the human experience because they allow an escape from awkward or undesirable situations. whoever 'they' are, they sure as hell are right.

    you tried your best to pay attention to everyone's name and goals for the group. you wanted to, but with the number of people surrounding you and how much was on your mind, it was tiring to listen past their occupation.

    "hi everyone, i'm youngjae," the conventional 'hi, youngjae' sounded from the group in a monotone state, defining the core of everyone's mood at this point of the support group. "i'm a songwriter for jyp entertainment, and my goal is to heal so i can focus on my job. my wife and i divorced after some internal issues." youngjae motioned to the man sitting next to him, nodding in his direction.

    not that you'd know, though. you were staring at your feet.

    "hi, everyone, my name is jeon jungkook." a man's voice stated, making your head shoot up from the ground. the sudden movement made his eyes dart towards yours, and the two of you sat frozen, only seeing each other, eyes locked. "i'm a teacher, and my goal is to stop thinking about her every day so i can move on." his voice became audibly quieter, but it didn't matter. the room was dead silent, anyway.

    you couldn't even hold your mouth open. your jaw and chest tightened. you didn't expect him to be here.

    you broke eye contact to eye his hands, his index finger and thumb of his right hand seemingly toying with a ring that was no longer there.

    a ring that was no longer there.

    your eyes met again. the air was tense and suffocating; the panic that filled only the two of you created an atmosphere only you and jungkook could feel.

    he broke eye contact, his glance now on his lap. his voice now barely a whisper, he spoke, still loud enough for you to hear. "i lost my wife in a car accident about a year ago. she was hit by a truck while she was coming home to me."

—

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[icecreamkink]

watched all of the untamed / cql in two weeks after my friend 1 told me abt mdzs a hundred years ago and my friends 2 and 3 tried to get me into cql for like two whole years and there are.

feelings.

very first scene is a very dramatic death in the middle of nightmare battle on sith planet land . i will forget abt it in the next tenish episodes and then will be very surprised when it becomes Extremely Painful

anyway magic flying gays and possession and human sacrifice! we are off to a great start

in retrospect, chaos goblin wei wuxian must have had a blast pretending to be so cRaZy and be as disruptive as he could as mo xuanyu lbr

listen. why is fire always evil coded. cant a magic clan wear red, black and orange and have flame motif while being wholesome?

For Legal Reasons These Are Not Zombies

i wish the politics of the sect were a bit clearer, especially at the beggining when the wen clan had sm power, was wen ruohan the chief cultivator? is that why they were so slow in responding to the attacks? im v confused by the pre yiling patriarch politics

fighting in the roof by the moonlight as way of flirtiiiiiiing. as i understand this is a wuxia/xianxia trope and honestly...... thank u for ur service

slight bullying and being a nuisance in general, as a way of flirting we love to see it

wwx: if i drink on the rooftop, thats not inside the cloud recesses! hmmm check and mate :D lwj: i will fuck u up so help me god   wwx: :0

i lov them

through hell or high water (quite literally) wei wuxian rem ains a trashfire gremlin till the end and i love him with my whole heart

in the pt subs wei wuxian calls jiang cheng a stubborn duck and i dearly wish that had come back

my opinions on almost every character goes from love to hate u - Hmm Me Like U - BABY. ILY. and i am Very Pleased w that. its been a while since i loved such a complete cast so much i think

no really. i WONT go into a detailed rant abt what i love about each of these characters and each of their relationships to each other. but i COULD. 

some lan disciples in the loudest whisper ever: YEAH THATS THE JIN BASTARD MENG YAO HEARD THE GOT SUPER HUMILIATED BY HIS DAD LOL SURE HOPE HE DOESNT TAKE SLIGHTS TO HIS CHARACTER TO HEART

lan xichen, immediately: i must Love him 

being into problematic ppl is in the Lan genetics, we come to realize

wen qing deserves so many awards for so many things but not snapping and just stabbing wen chao is at the top 

that scene at lan qirens class where wwx talks about using resentful energy to fight a violent spirit. exquisite.

 It establishes Good Student lan wangji, wei wuxian as curious and questioning and not afraid of taboo,  lwj sees that wwx is not, in fact, a dumb ass hes just a Dumbass,  shows us the audience (esp. a western audience) how shocking the idea of disrupting the dead/dying and controlling resentful energy actually is,  the theoretical foreshadow arguing, everyone else like ‘shUT UP’,  “and how could you ensure that the resentful energy would obey you and not hurt other?” “well i havent thought that far” and of course, lan qiren just straight up lobbing a hard object at wwx head,. chefs kiss

fellas is it gay to bother the hot rule obessessed nerd from ur school and make drawings of him with flowers in his hair and then hide gay porn in his book to antagonize him and ask him to hold ur hand and be ur friend and talk to him all the time and get him drunk and give him bunnies bc you know he likes them and give him a lantern and always want his attention and dedicate yourself to getting him to smile-

and after all of that wwx rly said oh i Admire him, aksd like yeah we all were there in high school buddy

i have Learned. caves = gay.

 accidental marriage +beint physically tied together with the sacred married ribbon+ gay panic+foreshadowing+bunnies! in the cave (1)

the story abt lan yi and baoshan sanren tho. i would like to see it

early days wen bros pull my heart strings like a guqin 

EVERYTHING about the lantern scene; disaster hets jiang yanli and jin zixuan; how wwx made lwj a bunny lantern. how soft and touched lwj was. wwx gleefully pointing out he was smiling and lwj IMMEDIATELY PULLING HIW SWORD ON HIM LMAO. tragically foreshadowy promises to do right by pepople, living without regrets. lwjs 'oh no do i love him??' face. just. all of it. 

i have it on good acc that in the novel lwj is explicitly Repressed Gay Panicked Big Horny which is delightful and rly Adds to the performance

 baby lwj is really just conceal dont feel dont let them know u have EMOTIONS (derogatory)

jiang cheng rly went "why dont.u go play with HIM if u like him so much"

jc and wwx have big BIG annoying sibling energy dont think too hard abt it or youll cry

lotus pier is soo pretty :((((((((((((((((

up until episode 13 you could think this could be a magical ancient chinese gays pride n prejudice w swords and shenanigans ................youre just not prepared for the game of thrones of it all

seriously ha ha ha i cried so much w this show my eyes genuinely swelled up . like. physically. fun timez fun timez

that being said, its hilarious that wen xu goes to cloud recesses like 'come out or ill kill all these hostages' and then DOESNT WAIT FOR AN ASWER AND KILLS THEM ALL IMMEDIATELY. do u know how blackmail works sir

 would like to make it recorded that from day one i was like 'CALL A GODDAMN CULTIVATION G20 THIS ASSHOLE SECT IS LITERALLY MASSACRING YALL!!' and it took them like 3 or 4 massacres to do anything and they STILL sent their heirs into their territory  LIKE

when wwx cites the gusu lan rules to wen chao tho. that rebel/attention whore/cutie pie 'look lan zhan i DID memorize the rules after all' ‘also a big fuck you to the wen sect :D :D’ sweet spot that scene achieves . delicious

all the cultivator young masters being petty af even though they are practically prisoners at the cave is hilarious and i love them

hurt and comfort + gay mistunderstandings + watsonian gay declaration music + accidental evil acquisition! at the cave (2)

its like where do i start? the fact theyre both trapped and kind of heavily injured inside an isolated cave with a murder turtle? wwx gay panicking lwj into coughing up bad blood? lwj being jealous as wwx babbles abt mianmian? telling him he shouldnt play with people and wwx saying he never played him? wwx going Oh. I See what is happening. YOU like mianmian, and lwj absolute done face ??? (iconic) wwx touching the sacred married ribbon Again? the telepathic communication? the sword? WEI WUXIAN ASKING LAN WANGJI TO SING TO HIM AS HE IS PASSING OUT AND LWJ SINGING HIM. THE SONG. HE WROTE. FOR WWX. AND THAT HE CALLED. THEIR SHIP NAME????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

they are SO insufferable pleeeeease

in the words of my friend 1 : “CQL is so gay we were all amazed how it got past the censors Ofc unfortunately it can't be novel level gay But they did their best And we love them for it”

in the theme of songs THIS OST. WUJI HAS BEEN LIVING IN MY MIND RENT FREE SINCE I FIRST HEARD IT the whole ost is so so sO beautiful.

 the costuming in this is also soooo exquisite. the embroidery? the fabrics? the details? how every sect and clan has a distinct style and architecture? (also ik they based each off of dif periods in chinese history which is REALLY fucking cool) just chefs kiss

the direction too!. i enjoy the unusual camera movements and i think they give it that Vibe, also their composition is PARTICULARLY good when it comes to telling the subtext through position of camera/position of character (like nhs off to the side in scenes he at first glance doesnt need to be/ how lwj is often centered when hes Jealous Yearning at wwx being affectionate w other ppl, wwx return from burial mounds etc)

ik madam yu is like Badass Milf Check and shes not getting any mom of the year awards but im delighted at how messy she is. IMAGINE that woman on tiktok

you better have enjoyed gay cave (2) bc its Just Pain from here on out! 

jiang fengmian and madame yu win the Most Dramatic Way to show they do care about each other, actually ..... ever :)

i thought jiang yanli jiang cheng and wei wuxian forcing themselves to escape yunmeng barely holding on after their parents are killed was going to be the height of pain in this show. ha. 

the family dynamics in general on this showwwww, both blood/ adopted/ found families, brotherly bonds and lifelong friendships just. rly. truly. fucked me up. theyre all so important and complicated and well rounded and beautiful and tragic

and beyond being a Win For the Gays im so glad the relationships w wwx and jiang yanli/ wen qing were NOT changed from platonic bc they are so much better like that imo. like maybe if we didnt Live In A Society it wouldnt be so, but the fact wwx and others can love and value them so much and theres nothing romantic or sexual abt it is like. so refreshing. especially @ jyl, with the way he and jc are overprotective of her and shes such a nurturing/care taker figure for them, it would just not vibe as well if they made it romantic

i love that this is a story abt Wei Wuxian, the Yiling Patriarch aka Actual Satan/Boogey Man/Village With/Public Enemy Number One , my dude is literally a necromancer who only dresses in black and has evil smokey black tendrils wafting out of him, but the really edgy one is still jiang cheng, pastel purple fashion icon

and speaking of best/worst siblings wei wuxian and jiang cheng *immediately starts crying* 

The Golden Core Transfer i just. no thots only tears 

wen qing and wen ning putting themselves in so much danger just.... to help them. wn saving jc from wen chao. wq finding a way to get wwx to transfer his core. like thinking about the monumental work these two did to help wwx and jyl and jc... jyl trying so fucking hard to be strong and keep on moving and giver her little brothers comfort after losing everything... jiang cheng. losing his parents and his home and his ability to do anything abt it and his complete desperation and lack of self worth and turning on them with agression  when he didnt realize all that they did for him ... hhhhhhhhhhhhh

me, pointing at the whole cast “i just LOVE them mom!!!”

its sad tho, that BARELY ANY of the women have like.... actual important conversations let alone relationships with each other at all in the story. and like wq and jyl have stayed at the same place for extended periods of time, where wq actively took care of her TWICE,  and still! not one measly convo, nothing! ................ .𝓌ₕᵧ

everyone in this show need a good sip of Self Worth and Stop Sacrificing Yourself juice 

ngl the sword flying looks very dumb 

“a-cheng, please bring a-xian back.” “i will, i promise.” ;-;

the whole calling each other by the More Intimate Version of the name, first as teasing and later as true intimacy. mmmhmmm yes

untamed where everythings the same but wwx evil flute song is eoeo

related that scene when wwx comes back from the burial mounds for the first time w demonic cultivation and he acts all formal and calls lwj hanguang-jun and keeps being evasive and distant and mean and soooooo................. facetious 

and how hes kind of desperately trying to keep intense lwj at bay (A FIRST) and avoiding actually talking to either of them and its all tension ughhh and then he MOCKS his and lwjs relationship, he jokes w him in this like... mean echo of their usual ~banter~ oof 

 and like!!! uncertain but so relieved jc who just HUGS him w no reservations for once and its not like he isnt just as worried as lwj abt wwx and what hes doing, but he chooses in that moment to enjoy getting him back first and mmhmMMMmMm yes (maybe my favorite scene in the whole show? MAYBE SO. ) 

highkey hurt me but also. i might be into mean wwx. i will take no criticism.

lan zhans sad eyes tho :((((((((( 

on one hand i wish we could have seen what happened at the burial mounds but on the other the timeskip adds so much flair to his return so im hnnn

also i love that hes been missing for 3 months reappears kinda melancholic and bloodthirsty and knowing malign tricks and jc is like 'so. are u sad bc of lan wangji'

when ur bae survived the war but he thinks ur evil/ might be evil so you cant kiss :///

hmmm talking at the rooftop under the moonlight not mentioning everything that stands between usssss

they are the two jades of lan and we’ll be the two heroes of yunmeng is the type of line u dont even need to know whats gonna happen to know thats gonna be sad

when they fight wen ruoshan at the nightless city i thought that was the battle we see at the first ep and its not and its so easy and theyre all like ‘yayy we won go wwx!’ i was just. SCREAMS WHAT is gonna HAPPEN

so like. post burial mounds/sunshot campaign pre yiling patriarch wwx is like. ultra arrogant, ultra mocking, peak lil shit and it gave me e v e r y t h i n g i wanted

even tho having the wen prisoners at the targets at phoenix mountain and still having wwx and jzx shooting the arrows was???? so.... tone deaf 

wwx: fucking w demonic energy   jyl: he has never done anything wrong in his life, ever <3 <3 (mood)

the parallels between meng yao/wei wuxian (and even xue yang a bit?) are Seen and they are Valid

wwx post burial mounds: can yall SHUT UP abt the goddamn sword (suibian left the chat)

LIKE truly, we talk abt the angst and yearning with wangxian. but what abt wwx and suibian. xianbian / xianqing angst and comfort 100k

take a shot everytime someone coughs up blood

zidian is simply the coolest spiritual weapon rip to suibian and chenqing and bichen and sendou and baixa........ but tis the truth 

cons: everyones families died in a nightmare war! everyones homes burned to the ground! everyone is traumatized! pros: everyone gets cooler clothes and weapons!!

wen ning and a-yuan and yanli bestest babes squad dont touch me rn

everyone: brooding and fighting                                                                wq and jyl: why dont you try some acupunture/drinking some soup and calm down huh? how abt that bitch?? 

showing the battle/massacre at the nightless city first was genius actually bc then everytime we have a cute scene w yunmeng bros and theyre like 'we'll be together forever! uwu' youre like oh. oh no. oh no no no. 

justice vs lawfulness vs means and ends 👁

jc: stay in the right path and practice the art of the sword                        wx: yeah thats not gonna happen chief

my reaction to wwx renouncing to the sect politics to help the wens was just that elmo burning gif in succession

the dramatic rain. wen qing desperately calling out to wen ning. the ghosts/puppets killing the guards. how terrifying wn actually was while wwx was controlling him :( lwj goeing after him to try and stop him and then he just; he Sees him and understands him even if he cant actually do anything about it other than let them go. 

“there must be somewhere in this earth we can go to :(((((((((”

"IF I HAVE TO FIGHT THEM, I'D RATHER IT BE YOU. DYING BY YOUR HANDS WOULD AT LEAST BE WORTH IT." oh my god oh my god oh my goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooddddddd

also lwjs umbrella is white w black smoke.. .  . nice

yiling patriarch / demonic farming burial mounds settlement is like one of my favorite concepts. they an "EVIL" FARMING COMMUNITY LED BY THE VILLAGE WITCH COME ON

they planted TURNIPS and LOTUS FLOWERS and ONE (1) baby and made lanterns and a common hall :(((((((

wen qing and wei wuxian, baddest bitches and genius science best friends i absolutely LOVED to see it. they rly went ‘is anyone gonna sibling/project partner that’ and didnt wait for an answer

both wwx and jyl getting lotus ponds at the burial mounds and in lanling bc they miss lotus pier ;;;;;;;w

;;;;; wish jyl had actually gone into the burial mounds. we were robbed of jyl and wq meeting again and jyl meeting a-yuan and seeing the settlement and the homes and all ;w; at least jc did go, stab wounds and broken arms and all

wwx like... having thrown his whole life away to help the wens (yeah the sect leaders and jin guangshan in particular wanting his stygian tiger amulet was an Element but still) and not.... necessarily regretting it, but grappling with all of the consequences of it... becoming moody and drepressed at times, missing his family and lotus pier and his friends and probably simply missing being around people and causing trouble, extrovert that he is, lashing out at the wens and at a-yuan, just in general the whole messiness of that experience

the way the resentful energy does affect his temperament is rly nice bc its not too in your face,(i mean outside of the Shaky Hands of Rage) but like he clearly has a much lesser control on his anger and impulsivity (tall order) than both before bm and after hes ressurected

on that note A-YUAN BABIEST BABY BOY BEST BOY

lan zhan being like oh hey there wei ying fancy meeting u and our son here. just passing by u know how it is hmmmmMm and then PLOT TWIST having defied orders to go see him and being punished for it. oof;;

 they habent seen each other in like? a year? and now theyre tgt 10 seconds and are already parenting a child together

also lwj rly kneels down in the snow way too much to be healthy

wwx: calm down guyssss i wont lose control of demonic cultivation omgggg  .   spoiler alert: he loses control of demonic cultivation

did u enjoy cute children? good bc now the Real Pain Begins

jiang yanli and jin zixuan rly out there APROPRIATING both disaster gays AND bury ur gays huh ;w;

i KNEW jin lings birthday was gonna fuck something up but the GASP that left my body when wwx lost control of wn and killed jin zixuan .. . . 

im sorry and thank you aaaaAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAaAAAAA 

when wen ning and wen qing were telling wwx their plan i was saying NO NO NO NO NO NO out loud in despair 

also can we talk abt how wq is definetely talking about only the both of them surrending themselves but then? everyone else just surrenders w them? IT MAKES NO SENSE LIKE WHY WOULD THEY what would be the Point

 sometimes there are some pretty gaping jumps in logic and continuity that are just like                     ?          ?

wwx: oh so when you try to murder me its justified but when i survive through dark magic and murder all of you its a "war crime"

unsurprisingly, his most feral, most spiraling moment talking to the sect leaders on the roof and attacking them and even fighting lan zhan is among my favorite scenes... its like, so painful to watch but also   so       thrilling   (and maybe my wen bbs dying arose some resentful energy in me what can i say) 

and its JUST, all they ever wanted was to do good but then... war. and trauma. and hubris. 

jiang cheng on the ground clearly thorn between what to do and feel is a Mood, lets just say

i was already crying when jyl showed up, but if i wasnt-

 i suffered SO MUCH through this series trying to figure out WHY jc would kill wwx. and when i understood. its somehow not as bad as i thought and also MUCH MUCH WORSE

a look into my group chat during the last flashback episodes:

SO ANYWAY. after the BLOOD BATH and RIPPING YOUR HEART OUT and FEEDING IT TO YOU  the untamed goes ‘ayy back to the present!! tu du dud ud du’ 

literally it ends a quarter into an episode and then KEEPS GOING i had to pause and stare blankly at the ceiling for an hour

babie cultivators and detective soulmates . i do need some cute after All of That 

(not that the pain is over LOL)

lwj is significantly less emotionally repressed in the present and its delightful. hes just ALL IN with wwx. and not just in the ‘i would and have killed various men and risked my reputation for you’ but also ‘ur tired here have a drink i brought it up cause i know u like it and it want you to be happy, always’

“when everyone praised me and wanted my power, you were the only one that challenged me. now that everyone hates me and wants me dead, youre the only one that stands by my side.” hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnnnnn 

and just filling in the blanks how lan zhan searched for him. for all of those 16 years he searched for him and was punished for it and raised a-yuan, the only survivor of the burial mounds settlement, as his own in gusu......

and jiang cheng.  being the tough love uncle . having raised the yunmeng jiang clan from the rubble all alone, his whole family dead, some of it on the blame of his own brother, his siblings, his closest friends gone.......and only jin ling there needing his guidance. 

THE PARALLEL BETWEEN JIN LING BEING A LIFELINE FOR JIANG CHENG AND A-YUAN FOR LAN WANGJI AFTER THE BATTLE AT THE NIGHTLESS CITY  

great now i made myself sad

and like . the fact! that lwj and jc dislike each other!!. jc projects blame onto him for wwx both “leaving” him and indirectly causing their families deaths and when hes so consumed by it he makes wwx an enemy, lwj is there now? trying to protect him?? and lwj, who can never understand the pain that wwx , indirectly or not put jc through, but who was right there when jc tried to kill him and will never allow him to hurt wwx again. and how they like. in a way project blame of their tragedies onto each other while dealing with some type of survivor guilt and in their own way still loving wwx through it all???  amd in way its kind of fundamentally selfish but also tragically understandable? and like when u put it against the fact that after he disappears during the sunshot campaign they were looking for him together and fought together??

JUST. THE CHARACTERS. AND THE RELATIONSHIPS IN THIS. MAN. UGH. GOD. 

and like i think thats what makes it so good? its such a sad and painful and violent story, edgy even, but its compelling bc at the center of it there are all of these relationships and different types of love and hope and. :( i love it

enough crying lets talk abt wwx sleeping at the jingshi with lwj and wearing his under garment for a minute 🙏

 jin ling just has that Was Raised by JC energy tho lmao i love him

babie cultivator squad is the perfect ammount of cute and comedic relief while still bearing the weight? of the narrative in a way, both from sizhui and jin lings existences, and also. like. how do i put this. they feel hopeful? they were born after a war, they came of age at a time of relative peace, they dont hold on so closely to the resentments of their parents/father figures, they are specifically shown as more accepting and open minded. and its like.... Hope for the future  

one of the ?? things  i love the most is the fact that the main cast are often in situations where theyre hunted/running but they like. never wear disguises... just going around in their gorgeous expensive clan clothes and hair ornaments and distinctive spiritual weapons.... maybe w a straw hat on, just for kicks

wwx teacher 🥺🥺🥺

so this is why its called Yi City Misery huh

a-qing is such. an icon. im so sad. my girl even knew to leave xys dumb self rotting by the road but no one listens to her thats why theyre all dead or sad 

her and xue yang measuring each other up was so entertaining lmao

 its the funniest thing when hes like. HERES MY SAD STORY. FOR WHY IM A SADISTIC MURDERER. I BROKE MY HAND ONCE. 

like ok someone broke his hand in a horrible way, and like Poverty, i get it but also like.......... that lost the brunt of a proper sob story like, 50 sadistic murders ago bby

and i love that xingchen does not entertain that for a second hes like ‘not ?????? good enough???’ and the best thing is he wasnt even like 'u hadto be the bigger person' or sth but ' well then break that dudes hand back, rip his arm off for i care, what do the rest of us have to do w anything???” 

anjo sensato :(

xue yang is like..... the sexy sadistic evil version of a himbo..... a meanbo...

the fucked upness of xy’s feelings for xxc/ xxc and sl feelings for each other... like my dude literally gave his bf HIS EYES. and xy getting so attached to xxc .... the fucked up fake domesticity.... having him hurt sl..... then desperately trying to bring him back ...................... oof

song lan........... literally had his eyes AND tongue removed, his bfs eyes put in place, was almost killed, turned into a puppet by his bf unknowingly, manipulated by xy, sees his bf killing himself in despair.... and STILL finds the strenght to get up from there, and keep on traveling and helping people and attempting to fix xxcs soul.......... like, my man. damn. 

wangxian looking at songxiao and seeing an Actually more painful parallel for themselves. ft. that Color Coding. 

THE A-YUAN/SIZHUI REVEAL PUNCHED ME IN THE HEART but in a good way for a change

should have know that he would be the Best Boy the cute one w all the braincells

the butterfly AND the bunny lantern. i see how it is

u know is very convenient that no one can see the stark black veins on wen nings neck, ever 

BAT WEN NING 

wns face when lwj comes into wwx room like ‘:0 omg did u two finally get your shit together? good for you master wei good for u’ 

(they didnt) (yet)

DISASTER DRUNK LWJ. JUST. THRUST SOME CHICKENS TO SHOW UR RESSURECTED BAE THAT U LOVE THEM.

i have absolutely no idea WHY they gave lwj the same punishment for fighting his own sect/allies to protect the burial mounds as when they got drunk on cloud recess class days.... like? its such a ... emotional continuity error again

also is lwj gonna get an actual friend besides wwx , ever

mianmian marrying and having a family and a cute life after saying FUCK U AND UR SYSTEM TOO in a much less unhinged and dramatic way than wwx......... fills me w joy

also lol the idea that like. her husband not knowing that shes friends w satan/the boogey man/the village witch is hilarious

i love nie mingjue bc hes the resident Though Guy but also the most dramatic bitch in this show and thats Saying Something

jin ling cant have one uneventful relative can he

the fact that everyone present already knew “mo xuanyu” was wwx at the stairs is so funny, their faces are like ‘oh............ wow. that. sure is a development. shock” 

in the tradition of extremely loud whispers wwx tells lwj with twelve guards standing like one meter away from them: HEY PSH LAN ZHAN PRETEND IM FORCING YOU TO STAY W ME DO IT

oh my god oh my god

the absolute Yearning on his face when he leaves wwx and a-yuan at the burial mounds and refuses to stay for dinner was already Enough but the fact?? they brought it back?? to this declaration of love?? their expressions??????? strike me dead right now just go ahead

lFor Legal Reasons We Cant Kiss but we will have a very sappy declaration of love and trust and look at each other in way that is the actualization of 💞💘💗💖💓💘💞💗💖💘💗💖💕💞

also icb all the sect leaders and guards are standing there watching them say they like like each other with a dozen swords pointing at their neck

i enjoyed the depiction of the fickle public perception and how easily it can be used to scapegoat people. when the sect leaders turn on jgy and wwx knows thats its more for convenience than anything else...

poor lxc is literally like 'oh so when YOUR problematic boyfriend gets called evil its a misunderstanding but when its MY problematic bf-'

ok like i cant get over nmj let jgy play a song that messed with his temperament at all, like maN u KNEW he might be shady wth

wwx: “hey dont say anything bad abt lan zhan hes not an arrogant dick, thats just his face. 

ME ON THE OTHER HAND"

the cultivators as wwx is poking holes in their narrative is literally *nazaré meme*

"wei wuxian-!" "what did i break your leg, too?" not to be problematic but i laughed so hard

not as hard as "you dont have the rank to talk to me " tho

i Enjoy that, over the course of story, wwx sees that... theres nothing truly to Do, but move on. he saw how his arrogance and his mistakes hurt others, and hes trying to fix what he can, but he already did die for his mistakes and there are things he cant fix and that's. just how it is. even towards jgy, the narrative doesn't go gleefully and completely with "lets make THEM pay bc theyre the big bad" bc its not that simple, and it wouldn't lead anywhere but more pain...

re him and jiang cheng and the wens and kinda. isnt that what nhs did? scheming to displace jgy out of revenge more than any justice and doing so in the most painful way?

idk if that actually makes sense im truly just babbling

i thought the scene at the lotus pond would be CUTE but the context was PAIN again

jiang cheng finding out about his golden core and his conflict with wwx at the guanyin temple .... destroyed me but in a nice way kinda.... same way it destroys him look at his face oh god

and. the fact??? he sacrificed himself for wwx?? first?? and he'll probably never tell anyone much less wwx???? keeps me up at night

i havent decided if the neckbreak transition between jgy does sth super Evil or does he he does OR Does He yes he does O R does heeeee is sth i dislike or not

jin guangyao and wei wuxians most interesting parallel is that... theyve both seen 'hmm hey this system is fucked up' and wwx went 'so fuck it all i will renounce it and challenge it' and jgy went 'so fuck it i will use all of it to my advantage and manipulate it to my goals and whims'

the fact jgys mom was actually great and he loved her and his whole issue w it was more than simply being ashamed of being a bastard kinda got me ngl

never trust a dude with a fan.

nhs and jgy: the first rule to a convoluted and decades spanning violent revenge plot is to have fun and be yourself! 

when a-yuan finally FINALLY remembers ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;-;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; wen ning has someone in his family back and a-yuan has someone to talk abt his wen family and wwx has him back bc he survived and lwj raised him anD HES THEIR SON. THEYRE MARRIED AND HAVE A SON. UGH.

and theyre allowed to heal. everyone is allowed to try and recover and be happy

netflix put all of the 3 endings on top of each other and it looks kinda weird actually BUT I DONT EVEN MIND :’’’’’’’’’)

the gasp that left me when lwj says ‘wei ying’ and wwx turns.........

there was also a screen with ‘thank you mxtx for creating these characters, we hope their wishes come true’ and i might. have cried then too. maybe. 

that was . a ride. as is proven by this behemot of a ramble clearly i just really needed and Outlet. i am currently trying to convince dumb monkey brain to not consume the other medias of mdzs immediately bc i REALLY need to like. live. a life. and take care of real responsibilities.  *longest oh boi ever*

[jackest-jack]

I would very much like to hear about your spooky scary Sirens, pretty please 🥺

AJKSJAKISJAJAJF Ok so I almost had a heart attack when I saw you were following me because YOU’RE SO COOL so thank you

I already wrote about my spooky scary sirens over here, and they have pictures and I would be willing to write a short thing with them later but for right now I’m gonna pick a different thing and blab about it.

The most fleshed out and cohesive thing I have is the vampire band nerd slasheresque story with a police chase followup as well as a separate zombie apocalypse thing, so ig I’ll go with that. More under cut and warning for like a lot of gore and death and angst. I’m also only doing the first part of that because this is taking a long ass time

I came up with this in junior high, and I was in band, and I noticed that each instrument section had different personalities sort of, so I made characters around that and put them in a horror plot where they all die horribly, because what else are you gonna do? This is gonna be a plot rundown and it might get real long. (It is no longer a rundown. Its just unedited word vomit.)

anyways a bunch of friends, who I’m just gonna call by their instrument names, go camping in the woods for a couple weeks. They all take one car and set up in the middle of fuckin nowhere.

Clarinets a vampire pretending to be a high schooler for kicks, because she was 15 when she turned 5 years ago and got dragged away to the magic underworld (basically a series of safehouses and towns for the supernatural) and she wants a letterman goddamnit.

She gets adopted into a friendgroup despite her best efforts, and gets dragged along on the camping trip in the small car and close quarters with a buddy system and she hasn’t eaten anything substantial in like two months and its proving to be a problem when she starts thinking of her friends as snacks instead of people.

one night, percussionist gets up to go on a 3 am lake walk. But, the buddy system. So he takes Clarinet, who never seems to sleep anyways, with him.

They’re on the edge of a lake littered with huge old chunks of driftwood, looking out over the water, when Percussionist steps on something sharp. It went straight through his sandal and he pulls it out without much trouble, but “that nail looks kind of rusty and I’m Pretty Sure I’m bleeding a little bit, oh I hope I don’t need a shot-“

she falls on him like a cat on a wounded songbird. She has enough of her mind left to cover his mouth and stop the screams as he slowly loses blood.

He tries to fight back. He does. he jams the nail deep into her throat and twists away, but she catches his wrist and slams him backward, a sharp stick going through his stomach, sticking him bloody at the base of an old driftwood branch still attached to its old tree.

She stops draining just before he dies. And she waits, and waits, and waits. Finally, hours later, the corpse takes a deep gasp and its eyes fly open. It begins the excruciating process of pulling itself off the tree.

his wound is closed less than a minute later.

he comes to and sees her sobbing on the ground, bloody streaks under her eyes from where she tried to wipe away her tears with hands soaked from putting pressure on his stomach in a feeble attempt to save him.

“Vampires, huh?” He says, half joking, half looking for an explanation.

—-—

they’re sitting around a small campfire, and Clarinet tells him that he’s a vampire, he needs blood, he cant go back to camp or he will eat his friends. She leaves to find him something substantial before he loses it.

back at the original camp, its around sunrise. Flute notices a small trail of smoke not far off, realizes that Percussionist is missing, and gets French Horn to help him look for their idiot friend (and maybe put out a small fire.)

They make it about 3/4th of the way to the smoke when flute trips on a tree root and scrapes his knee. About a mile away, Percussionists head perks up.

He distantly realizes that he just left the campfire that he’s supposed to stay at, but he can‘t seem to care. The hunger doesn’t gnaw at him or hollow him out. Its not like looking for a fix either. Its an itch in his whole body, a near unavoidable function of his being. The hunt is as natural as a cough, a spasm of muscles to take away the awful itch.

He moves faster than he ever could before, and just to see if he can, he jumps up and begins running across the branches of trees. Its slower, but sneakier; his prey won’t see him coming.

Finally, he reaches them. He jumps on the smaller one, sending it crashing to the ground. It’s blood is what brought him here. He sinks his hollow teeth into its neck and begins feeding.

There is a scream and a crash as the taller one runs away. Thats ok. He only needs one.

———

French horn, for her part, is freaking the fuck out. The sun had just peaked over the horizon and orange light was streaming through the trees when everything went to shit.

The pale thing had fallen on Flute, and the noise he made… she was almost certain he was dead now.

She kept running. If she could make it back to camp, then maybe she could get help, or maybe leave before the rest of them died too.

She charges through a thicket, sharp thorns scraping and tearing every inch of her as she shoves her way through. She shuts her eyes as she goes, to avoid the thorns poking them out.

When she comes out the other side, she feels her gut sink.

She doesn’t recognize the trees or bushes around her. She doesn’t see a path.

She’s lost.

She wants to break down, to scream and cry the injustice to the heavens, to kick and punch and fight the thing that killed her friend, to sit down and rest and have a moment to breathe, to be home-

She picks a direction and runs.

———

Percussionist stops draining Flute just before he‘s dead, following the instinct that drove him to where he is.

He wants to be horrified. He does, really. But he was so hungry, and the itch is still there, waiting beneath his skin to pounce on him again. But for now, its gone, and he can think clearly. He can move without the instinct tainting his every twitch.

He turns to look at the person he drained and sees-

He sees his friend. And it hits him all at once.

He killed a person, a person he knew, a person he cared for, and he had been powerless to stop it. He didn’t even know- he didn’t realize- he would never have done it if he-

but he knew he would have. Even if he knew. He would’ve killed Flute, and he hates himself for that.

So he sits by the body of his dead friend, maybe in solace, maybe because some instinctive tick tells him to. He doesn’t want to know. He refuses to.

When Flute sat up and gasped, Percussionist could‘ve sworn he had a heart attack (even without a functioning heart.)

To Flutes credit, he made it through Percussionists halting and confused explanation before letting himself ask about the smell.

”what smell?” Percussionist asked, and lifted his nose to the air.

He got his answer. The smell of blood, salty and sweet and with a coppery tinge to it drifted through the air, leaving a hunger and odd comfort sitting in his gut. It reminded him of smelling baking cookies from the kitchen as a kid.

A leaf crunched, and he snapped out of his trance. Flute had stood up and broken into a run, faster than any human could’ve gone. After the person that had been with him.

After his friend.

Percussionist sprinted after him.

——

He had the chance to notice how fast he was really going, now that he could think through the hunger. He practically flew through the forest, leaping over a fallen log half his size that blocked his way. He ducked and dodged branches that threatened to slash his face, and if he were running for something else he may have threw his head back and laughed.

As it was, he was following the occasional red flash of a windbreaker that he could barely keep up with without being hit by a tree.

He could heal now right? Did he really even need to be worried about being hit by trees?

He let one slap his face just to test, and he felt the stinging pain all across his face as a deep cut opened across his nose and eyes. He faltered as his vision went red with blood. A second later, it was gone, and he could see again. ….And he‘d lost flute. Great.

He sniffed the air, remembering how he’d been able to smell the blood, and tried to look for his friend.

He could smell the whole forest. Sap and pine and rotting leaves, rotten flesh and mushrooms and a skunk miles and miles off, the sweet sting of honey and dew and campfire smoke, and over it all, the most lovely smell-

Well, looks like he couldn’t find him that way. He thought for a moment, and groaned. He could just follow French Horn and get to her first!

He began running again.

———

Clarinet had just made it back to the campsite, a live deer kicking around over her shoulder. She would’ve killed it, but she couldn’t quite figure out how without losing any of its blood, and since she drained and seriously injured Percussionist he would need a lot of blood-

and the campfire had a suspicious lack of vampires around it. Great. She could only hope that no one had cut themselves-

She stopped as the scent of blood hit her nose. She cursed and took off running, dropping the deer as she did.

——

French Horn thought she was going to die when she heard a bush rustle and snap behind her. She had stopped for a rest, thinking she was safe (if very lost). She was braced for her death when Percussionist crashed through the bushes.

”Oh, good, you’re still alive. We need to go like right now.”

Before she could protest, he grabbed her wrist and began pulling her away. With his very cold, very pale hand.

”Wait. Was it you?” She said, planting her feet.

”Yes.” his voice was solemn, and his eyes downcast. “But unless you want Flute to get you, we need to go”

She tore her wrist out of his grasp.

“Flutes dead. Flute’s dead and you killed him!”

And Flute hit her from the side. He sank his teeth deep into her neck, but only for a moment. Then he pulled back, looking horrified and ran away.

French Horn stands up dazedly. “That was…”

”Yeah.”

she lifts a hand to her bleeding neck where the bite is still gushing blood.

A rustle of trees comes from the side, and Clarinet skids to a stop in front of them. She takes in the situation and drops to her knees, tearing loose a piece of her shirt and holding it to the holes in French Horn’s neck.

”Wheres the third?”

French horn points to the copse of trees he disappeared into.

”I think we might actually be jinxed.” A pause, then “That was supposed to be a joke. Go after him. He’s heading towards the camp, and chances are he won’t be able to stop himself a second time.”

Percussionist nods, and then stops. “How do I get there?”

”just run straight! GO!”

and he does.

———

Clarinet gently explains to French Horn that vampires are real, and that she is one. When asked why she isn’t bloodthirsty, Clarinet answers that she has a lot of blood left in her still, and that she’s not all the way changed, and that the change will, in her words, “Stink. Its kind of the worst thing you’ll have to go through, and it’ll take way longer since you have blood, and you may not notice at first.“

French Horn pursed her lips. “Theres no way to stop it?”

Clarinet shook her head.

”Okay. Okay, shouln’t we help Percussionist?”

Clarinet swore. “You won’t be much help in the state you’re in, but I can drop you off by the camp. Pack our things and be ready to go.”

Clarinet scooped French Horn up and took off into the woods.

———

Percussionist got there just as Tuba was ripping Flute off of his neck.

Despite Flute being the smallest out of all of them, and Tuba being the strongest, he was struggling to keep the scrabbling, biting Flute away.

So, Percussionist did the only logical thing and full body tackled Flute, trying to hold him down. It worked, sort of. Long enough for Tuba to start running. Long enough for Sax and Trombone to see what the ruckus was.

Flute burst out of Percussionists grip, grabbed Trombone and ran.

Sax sprinted after them, and percussionist was left in the dust, standing dumbstruck as they all dashed off. He snapped out of it when Trumpet pressed an axe to his shoulder and told him to not move.

———

Flute knows this: he is very hungry. He also knows that blood tastes very good.

His last two meals escaped. He thinks he let the first go, but he can’t seem to remember why. The second was ripped away from him by someone like him, which was rather rude.

But this one won’t get away. He is far to hungry to let that happen.

He feeds as he runs, draining the squirming thing dry, pinning its flailing limbs against his chest. It stops wailing eventually.

He slows as he becomes able to think clearly again. He holds the body in his arms and revels in the fact he is no longer hungry. Then, he looks at the thing he drained.

And it’s his friend. He feels his stomach drop, and a hollow pit grow in his chest. His friend is dead, and it’s his fault. He tells himself there’s nothing to do but run, so he does.

Really, though, he just doesn’t want to see what she’ll become.

———

“What did you do to them.” Said Trumpet, each word slow and dangerous. She lifted the axe off his shoulder, and he felt relief before he realized she was lining up to take off his head.

He may be able to heal, but he did not want to see how far that ability stretched. Not like this, at least.

He swallowed his fear and asked, ”What makes you think I did something?“

She barked out a harsh laugh. “You go missing in the middle of the night with Clarinet, who still isn’t back. Flute and French Horn go to look for you and have mysteriously disappeared. Tuba came running from this direction, bleeding like a stuck pig. And here I find you, in the center of it all.”

Ah. He was fucked. Time to implement the worst plan ever, considering how fast Trumpet was.

”that’s- that sure is some pretty overwhelming evidence that I did something. I swear I didn’t, though but I know you won’t believe me so I’m just gonna RUN!”

He ducked under the axe she swung at his head, and took off running into the trees. He glanced behind him to see her struggling to keep up, and grinned. He was actually getting away with his head, and beating Trumpet in a footrace for once-

He turned back around just in time to see the tree that crumpled his skull.

———

He wished he could say he didn’t feel every excruciating twitch of his skull righting itself as he laid there. As it was, it was painful enough he was functionally passed out.

Which is why he was surprised to see trumpet dragging him by his feet deep into the woods.

Not half as surprised as trumpet, who dropped his feet and swore when he sat up and gasped.

”What the hell? You were dead! that killed you!” She yelled.

Percussionist was still reeling from how much growing his skull back sucked, and latched on to the first thing he noticed.

”Did you steal my shoes?”

”what are you?” She asked in a tone that was decidedly horrified.

He fiddled with a piece of grass somewhere to his left. “A vampire, as of yesterday. Really though, why do you have my shoes?”

“Not important. What do you mean as of yesterday?”

”Last night, really. Me and Clarinet-“

”Clarinet and I.” She said.

”Whatever. We went on a walk and turns out she’s always been a vampire, and then she did the vampire thing, and now I’m a vampire, and things have just been spiraling from there-”

”That explains a lot, actually. Who else is a vampire?”

Percussionist, feeling slightly more alive, realized they weren’t by the camp anymore.

”Where are we? Why do you have my shoes, and why are you so calm about this?”

”oh.” She said. “I may have made an action plan for something like this. You know, in case of murderers, or if supernatural stuff was real.”

”thats cool. Why steal my shoes?“

”I was framing you for murder.”

an awkward silence settled over them.

”We should get back to camp. Stop more people from getting vampired and all.”

”Yeah. Lets do that.“

———

Sax skidded to a stop in front of Trombones body. She was limp, and pale, and by all accounts dead. He whipped out his phone to call anyone, anyone at all, and pitched it into a tree when it read no service.

He sat, and he cried by his best friend, who always made the shittiest puns, who was the worst at sports, who thought anything with soulmates was stupid but still read all the stuff he suggested her. Who was dead.

He was still crying when she sat up and latched onto his neck, draining him dry.

———

French Horn and Clarinet ran across Tuba, who was holding gauze to his neck where he had been bit. French Horn was starting to feel slightly feverish, but otherwise okay.

”Guys! Are you okay? The weirdest thing just happened.” He said.

”We need to leave.” Said Clarinet. “Now.”

”No argument here. Have you guys seen Flute? He was with you last time I saw him.“

French Horn and Clarinet shared a look.

“I’ll go find him. You two pack. we leave before dusk.”

They watched as she disappeared into the leaves.

”Whats going on?” Asked tuba, a hint of worry in his voice.

French Horn took a deep breath in before saying “Vampires are real.”

Tuba burst out laughing.

“Oh. You’re serious.” He said as he hefted a tent into the back of the van.

”you don’t believe me.”

“How could I? I haven’t seen any proof that they exist.”

She threw a bag of trash in the van with more force than nessecary.

“What attacked you then?”

At this he paused. “I don’t know. But I’m pretty sure it wasn’t a vampire.”

———

Percussionist and Trumpet made it to where Trombone was crying over Sax, the late afternoon sun reflecting off of their now pale skin.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay. He’ll be alright.”

Trombone looked up at him and snarled, all teeth and rage, and Percussionist jumped back.

”He’ll end up like me, won’t he.”

Percussionist nodded.

”I don’t know what world you’re living in, but this isn’t fucking alright!”

Trumpet walked over and knelt in front of Trombone. She held out her hand, and Trombone scrambled away.

”I don’t believe you would hurt me. Not right now. I know you didn’t do it on purpose.”

”so what?” She scoffed. “I still did it. Should I just go on existing as whatever I am now? Just kill people so I can live?”

”Actually,“ Percussionist said, “we can live off of different types of blood.”

Trumpet looked back and pinched the bridge of her nose. “Shut up you twatwaffle, can’t you see this is a delicate moment?”

”just figured it would be some good information to have.“ he said.

“Are you seriously telling me my angst fest was for nothing?” She asked.

Percussionist leaned against a tree. “Oh, don‘t worry.” He said. “Theres still plenty of angst about the immortality.”

“Sax did always say he wanted to be sixteen forever.”

Trumpet rolled her eyes. “Lets go home.”

Trombone reached out to take Trumpets hand, and Sax shot up and clamped his jaws around her throat. Trombone grabbed Trumpets wrist and pulled her away as Percussionist peeled Sax away.

”Let him.“ choked out Trumpet. “I‘ll be one of you either way.”

”Absolutely not!” Said Percussionist. “Trombone, go find literally anything else with blood.” Sax kicked and snarled in his grip. “Hurry! I’m not sure how much longer I can hold him.”

———

“Flute!” Yelled Clarinet. She had been looking for him for an hour now, and still couldn’t find him.

She was walking along an old trail that went out of use years ago when she almost tripped over him. He was curled up in the shade of a tree, hiding away in a hollow.

“What do you want.”

”I want to take you home.” She said.

he laughed. “Something like me doesn’t deserve a home. I killed people, and I knew there was another way, but I did it anyway. Just leave me here to rot.”

She remembered when she’d been like this. She had forgotten to eat, had slipped up. Its not a hard thing to do. When you’re a vampire, you brain tricks you into feeling fine by your old standards until you‘re so hungry you can’t stop it.

She believed it was all her fault, though. The only way someone had gotten through to her was something they had called twisting the knife. She had always called it shitty.

She sighed. “I wanted to say sorry.”

He poked his head out a little, peering up at her. “You didn’t do anything.”

”But I did.” She said. “I drained percussionist dry last night, and then I left him to find you. I watched while you attacked your friends, and now, I’m giving you a chance to fix the harm we caused. What will you do with it?”

”You made me like this?” He asked.

”Yes.”

he lunged at her face, fingers clawing for her eyes. She turned around and ran for the campsite, making sure he was behind her, and praying that he would forgive her for the stunt she just pulled.

———

The campsite was packed, and Percussionist and Trombone had made a game of who could catch the best songbird for Sax. Sax was less murderously inclined, though it was hard to tell if it was because the blood he had consumed or trumpets growing nonhumanness.

After the third or fourth time of watching Sax suck down a bird or squirrel like a juice box, Tuba was forced to admit that maybe vampires were a little real.

(He noticed his neck wound had already scabbed over and was halfway gone. He was afraid to ask if he was becoming one.)

The sun was slipping behind the tops of the trees when Clarinet charged out of the forest, leapt over the van, And yelled “Flutes trying to kill me!”

Flute burst into the clearing and lunged at Clarinet. Percussionist stepped in the way.

”What happened?“

”She did this in purpose! She said she dropped you in the woods to kill us!”

Percussionists blinked. “No she didn’t. She told me to stay where I was while she got something for me to eat.”

he stopped yelling. Now, he just looked confused. “But she turned you.”

”Yeah? It was an accident. She obviously regretted it.”

Percussionist backed off, and Flute looked at clarinet.

”why did you say all that then?”

“You were’t gonna come with me if I didn’t. Besides, you were spiraling and this was the easiest way to stop that.”

”Sounds like the shittiest way to stop it, too.” Scoffed Tuba.

She sighed. “Yeah. It was.”

”Hey,” asked sax. “Are any of us still human? I know me, Percussionist, and Trombone aren’t-“

”Percussionist, Trombone, and I.” Said Trumpet.

”-And I saw you two jump over my van, but whats up with the rest of you?”

”Basically,” said Clarinet, “anyone who was bit is or will become a vampire, depending on how much blood they had left in them after the bite. Was there anyone who wasn’t bit?”

everyone was silent as they all glanced at each other, looking for anyone who could say yes. It quickly became awkward, and was broken by Clarinet muttering “Fuck.” quietly under her breath.

”Who all, um, died today?”

Flute, Sax, and Trombone slowly raised their hands. Clarinet squinted at Percussionist, which prompted him to say “What? I died last night.”

French Horn yelled “past twenty four hours, dingus.”

He rolled his eyes and raised his hand.

”Alright. You three,” -she made a sweeping gesture towards the three with their hands down- “Are going to have the worst couple weeks of your life. Take a few days off of everything. Don’t go to the hospital. Stay isolated. Call me when the pain’s mostly over.”

Tuba’s lips pursed. “What, exactly, is going to happen to us?”

”The way it was explained to me was that your body slowly cannibalizes itself. It sucks.”

”hm.” He said. He looked very troubled.

They got in the van and drove through the night.

For now, they rest. A short break, before they have to figure out the rest of their lives.

[tigerkirby215]

5e Fluttershy, the Element of Kindness build (My Little Pony: FIM)

(Artwork by SophiesPlushies on DeviantArt.)

Like, it took me a solid 5 minutes to find the first image in this post and I had to sift through so much softcore porn to find it. I didn’t even find it by searching DeviantArt I had to go on fucking derpibooru oh my lord.

Anyways: here’s another shit brony build because people don’t hate me enough! Well that and I do genuinely love the characters from My Little Pony, and think that they’d be fun to make builds for. But feel free to call me a garbage brony at your leisure.

These are the words of a man who has been beaten down after being a brony for around 10 years.

GOALS

I'm just good with animals - Fluttershy talks to animals. That’s one of the main things she does really.

I'm doing this because you're my very best friend - As the element of kindness we of course need to share our heart and soul with our friends.

Nopony pushes new Fluttershy around! - MLP Wiki makes an express point of mentioning The Stare in Fluttershy’s powers, so of course we’ll do our best to include that.

RACE

Before you say anything no I’m not a pegasi stan just because I did both Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash. Regardless Aaracokra still makes the most sense for Fluttershy unfortunately because there’s few bird races and fewer flying races.

As an Aaracokra you +2 to Dexterity and +1 to Wisdom which we’ll be keeping because I don’t know if your DM will allow Tasha’s rules. You also get 50 feet of Flight but you can’t be wearing Medium or Heavy Armor to do this, which means I don’t get to say “something something Medium Armor.” And finally you can buck someone to deal damage equal to a d4 plus your Strength; technically their Talons which deal slashing damage but feel free to view them however you want.

If I was to build Fluttershy I’d honestly use the Owlfolk UA race (which will hopefully be out in Wild Beyond the Witchlight and / or Strixhaven) for a multitude of reasons, the most notable of which being the fact that you can fly with Medium armor as an Owlfolk. But the Detect Magic Ritual ability is also nice as is the reaction to stop yourself from falling. Unfortunately Aaracokra technically made more sense since Fluttershy can’t detect magic.

Basically even I have to make choices which are suboptimal in order to ensure maximum roleplay, and even when I play my builds I change them to make them better to play.

ABILITY SCORES

15; WISDOM - You are compassionate and good with animals: both those things are Wisdom skills!

14; DEXTERITY - Since I can’t go “something something medium armor” for this build (yay Aaracokra) I guess getting a 16 in DEX thanks to your race is a good call. If playing an Owlfolk or something you can afford to having 14 total in DEX, as you can then wear medium armor.

13; CONSTITUTION - Look, roleplay stats are great and all but so is not dying.

12; CHARISMA - You are cute small pony... bird... Pony-bird...

10; INTELLIGENCE - Most of your time was spent taking care of animals and most of your knowledge comes from on-hand training as opposed to studying. Basically you’re not Twilight.

8; STRENGTH - As a young filly Rainbow Dash would do most of the heavy lifting for you. As a young mare Rainbow Dash still does most the heavy lifting for you. She is a Barbarian after all!

BACKGROUND

Most ponies know to come to you if their pets are in trouble, and if you’ve ever had pets you know the doctor that helps them is a true Folk Hero. As a Folk Hero you get proficiency in Animal Handling (yay) but I’d swap the Survival proficiency out for Stealth because well... you’re very good at hiding. You also get proficiency with Land Vehicles (most Land Vehicles in D&D are controlled by animals; usually horses! Wait... aren’t you a horse?) and an Artisan’s Tool of your choice: go for Carpenter’s Tools to make some bird houses and chicken coops!

After living in Ponyville for so long most ponies are willing to give you some Rustic Hospitality, giving you a warm place to rest and recover... as long as you can get over your crippling shyness! Eep!

(Artwork by probablyfakeblonde on DeviantArt.)

THE BUILD

LEVEL 1 - CLERIC 1

Starting off as a Cleric because I thought Wisdom and Charisma saves were more fitting for Fluttershy, and for the Insight and Medicine skill proficiencies.

As a Cleric you get to choose your subclass at level 1, and there’s nothing you love more than a little bit of Peace and quiet. As a Peace Cleric you get proficiency in Performance thanks to Implement of Peace, for those great MLP song numbers. But more importantly you can call on the power of friendship for an Emboldening Bond!

As an action, you choose a number of friends within 30 feet of you (this can include yourself) equal to your proficiency bonus. Your friendship bonds them together for 10 minutes or until you use this feature again. While any bonded creature is within 30 feet of another they get a d4 they can add to an attack roll, ability check, or saving throw once per turn. You can use this feature a number of times equal to your proficiency bonus, and you regain all expended uses when you finish a long rest.

And finally we can talk about the Spellcasting! You get three cantrips from the Cleric list at level 1: Guidance is always welcome among friends, and Spare the Dying can be a literal life safer! Other than that you are still expected to fight in D&D so take Sacred Flame to defend yourself. You can also prepare a number of spells equal to your Cleric level plus your Wisdom modifier. As a Peace Domain Cleric you can inspire Heroism among your friends, or protect yourself (and hide!) with Sanctuary.

Other than that Healing Word is a staple healing spell (we aren’t taking Cure Wounds right now for reasons but feel free to prepare it), Shield of Faith will let you defend your allies, Protection from Evil and Good will help you invoke the Elements of Harmony against the big bad of the season, and Detect Evil and Good will help you find the Elements of Harmony!

You could also take Bless, but I’m not going to tell you to take Bless because optimizers would crucify me for telling you to double up on d4s.

LEVEL 2 - CLERIC 2

Second level Clerics get their Channel Divinity once per short rest and you have a variety of options to choose from:

Turn Undead will make skeletons and zombies not want to hurt the cute little ponies, which will force them to run away for awhile.

Balm of Peace (the main reason we took the second level in Cleric) will let you run around and heal all your friends for 2d6 plus your Wisdom modifier.

And Harness Divine Power (ty Tasha’s) will let you recover a spell slot, but can only be used a limited amount of times per Long Rest.

You can also prepare another spell and be a little less nice with Command. Telling your enemies to “LOVE” isn’t going to be that effective, but making them grovel or drop works just as fine.

LEVEL 3 - RANGER 1

When you spend enough time around animals you’re automatically either a Ranger or a Druid. Quinn? Never heard of ‘em. Regardless multiclassing into Ranger gives you proficiency in a skill from the Ranger list and it’s good to know about Nature so you can find plants to help your fluffy buddies! Deft Explorer also gives you two language proficiencies (again: pick your poison) and Expertise in a skill. You’ll never guess which skill we’ll be getting... it’s Animal Handling. You’re good with animals.

We actually aren’t going to be taking Favored Foe because we aren’t using weapons for one, but more importantly despite it’s name Favored Enemy is also good for tracking friends! You have advantage on Survival checks to track your favored “enemies”, as well as on Intelligence checks to recall information about them. Go for Beasts to easily find a feathered or fluffy friend! Oh and you also get more languages because I don’t know why, so again pick your poison.

LEVEL 4 - RANGER 2

Second level Rangers get their Fighting Style, or as I like to call it your Helping Style because we’ll be going for Druidic Warrior! You can pick up two cantrips from the Druid list: I opted for Druidcraft (you can grow some flowers for your friends; yay!) and Mending to tend to your cottage.

And of course with cantrips we also get more Spellcasting! You can learn two spells from the Druid list: you’re never not going to want Cure Wounds (which is why we didn’t take it earlier btw) and Animal Friendship is an obvious must.

LEVEL 5 - RANGER 3

Third level Rangers get to choose their Ranger Archetype and we’ll be going for the Gloomsta- Ah you all know it’s going to be Beast Master. You get a Ranger’s Companion not from the PHB but from Tasha’s! The Beast of Land would make the most sense and while it’s probably expected that they be a wolf or something you can pretend that you’re playing Fighting is Magic and have Angel Bunny fight for you! Anyways here’s a crash course on your new fluffy friend:

Their AC is equal to 13 plus your proficiency bonus (currently 16.)

Their health is equal to 5 + five times your Ranger level (currently 20) and they have a number of d8 hit die equal to your Ranger level.

They have a 40 foot movement speed and a 40 foot climbing speed.

You can command it to attack with your bonus action; it has the same hit chance as your spell hit chance (WIS mod + Prof Bonus [currently 6]) and deals a d8 + 2 + prof bonus damage.

If they move at least 20 feet straight toward a target and then hit with an attack on the same turn, the target takes an extra 1d6 slashing damage and must make a Strength saving throw against your spell save DC (if they’re a creature.) If they fail they’re knocked prone.

You can command the beast to attack, dash, disengage, or hide with your bonus action.

If you don’t command it they take the dodge action.

You can revive them with a spell of first level or higher 1 hour after they die, and can change your beast after a long rest.

Man, who knew that taking care of a pet was so difficult? Well you also get Primeval Awareness (because Primal Awareness actually doesn’t work that well for this build.) You can use your action and one spell slot to sense the following types of creatures within 1 mile of you: aberrations, celestials, dragons, elementals, fey, fiends, and undead. This lasts for one minute, and doesn’t reveal the creatures’ location or number.

And you learn another spell: Goodberry is good to feed yourself and all your friends! As long as they’re okay with eating berries, of course. C’mon... they’re good for you! Pleeeease?

(Artwork by AssasinMonkey on DeviantArt.)

LEVEL 6 - RANGER 4

Finally an Ability Score Improvement... or Feat? We’ll be going for Eldritch Adept, which is admittedly weird but it’s the only way to get Beast Speech so you can Speak with Animals at will! Is total level 6 a little late to finally be able to speak with animals? Yeah, but this is unlimited so it fits better and doesn’t spend your spell slots.

LEVEL 7 - CLERIC 3

Finally back to Cleric land which means finally we can prepare some second level spells! As a Peace domain Cleric you automatically get Aid and Warding Bond prepared, both of which are very good for keeping your friends alive. You can also finally get Hold Person to finally have The Stare!

LEVEL 8 - CLERIC 4

Level 4 in Cleric means another Ability Score Improvement: Wisdom is still your core stat so increasing that by 2 would be your best choice.

You also get another cantrip at this level, and can prepare two more spells! For cantrips I’d recommend Light to see with your dumb bird eyes unless you’re an Owlfolk, and I’d recommend preparing Lesser Restoration and Enhance Ability to further boost your friends.

(Artwork by Koveliana on DeviantArt.)

LEVEL 9 - CLERIC 5

5th level Clerics can now Destroy Undead of CR 1/2 or lower with their Channel Divinity. Don’t feel too bad about it; they were big dumb meanies anyways!

You can also prepare third level spells too! As a Peace Domain Cleric you get Beacon of Hope to help with healing, and Spike can send letters out for you with Sending. You can also prepare Dispel Magic in case Twilight needs help with more dangerous spells.

LEVEL 10 - CLERIC 6

6th level Peace Clerics get Protective Bond. When a creature affected by your Emboldening Bond is about to take damage, another bonded creature within 30 feet of the first can use its reaction to teleport to an unoccupied space within 5 feet of the first creature. That creature then takes all the damage instead. It’s worth mentioning that since this specifies “creature” you can actually bond with your beast companion and have it use its reaction, or have others go in to defend angel.

You can also prepare another third level spell like Revivify, so you don’t lose any friends. And to top it off you can use your Channel Divinity twice per short rest! Woohoo!

LEVEL 11 - CLERIC 7

7th level Cleric, 4th level spells. As a Peace Domain Cleric you get Aura of Purity to protect your friends, and Otiluke’s Resilient Sphere to put your enemies in time out. You can also prepare another spell like Freedom of Movement, in case you need to run!

LEVEL 12 - CLERIC 8

8th level Clerics get a variety of features. To start off you get an Ability Score Improvement, which means we can finally cap off your Wisdom for maximum spellcasting! This also means you can prepare more spells, but we’re actually going to hold off on getting more spells for now.

You can also put a little more LOVE into your spells with Potent Spellcasting, adding your Wisdom modifier to the damage of your Cleric cantrips. And finally your Channel Divinity will now Destroy Undead or CR 1 or lower.

LEVEL 13 - CLERIC 9

The reason we held off on getting more Cleric spells last level is because now we get those big 5th level spells! As a Peace Domain Cleric you can help your friends out of any jam with Greater Restoration, and know what they really mean to say thanks to Rary’s Telepathic Bond.

You can also prepare some of those big hitter spells like Mass Cure Wounds to save your friends, and you can cast both Dawn and Summon Celestial to call on Celestia herself! Isn’t that Twilight’s job? Well, it’s still good to have contacts!

(Artwork by CigarsCigarettes on DeviantArt.)

LEVEL 14 - RANGER 5

Now that we’ve got all the support we could need for our friends it’s time to return to our roots and focus on Angel! Feel free to focus more on Ranger instead of Cleric if you so desire when building this yourself; I simply opted for more healing instead of damage.

We’re finally 5th level with Ranger which finally means you’ll be getting an Extra Attack!... Which you probably won’t use because you can use cantrips instead. Well it’s still nice to have?

The good thing though is that you can learn more Ranger spells like Healing Spirit, which is a really strong healing spell that was kinda gutted by erratas. But it’s still nice and efficient regardless of what spell slot you casted it at, effectively being a 6d6 heal for a second level spell slot!

LEVEL 15 - RANGER 6

6th level Rangers can now add Roving to their list of skills from Deft Explorer. Your movement speed increases by 5 feet, and you get both a climbing and swimming speed equal to your walking speed. Is total level 15 a little late to get a 30 foot movement speed? Yeah probably, but every little bit helps!

Speaking of another little bit you get another Favored Enemy... I mean friend! ...I don’t know pick whatever you think will be relevant for the campaign. Also yes: you do get more languages, because Ranger.

LEVEL 16 - RANGER 7

7th level Beast Masters have Exceptional Training with their Animal Companion. You can use a bonus action to command the beast to take the Dash, Disengage, or Help action on its turn... which you could already do anyways thanks to Tasha’s.

I’d say that after Tasha’s this feature would work even if you don’t command your beast, but as always discuss the rules with your DM.

Well at least Angel’s attacks count as magical to overcome resistances, which is good because you were probably dealing with nonmagical resistance for awhile now.

You can also prepare another spell like Pass Without Trace, so you and your friends can sneak around unseen. Pass Without Trace is one of those spells that is always useful regardless of what level you are, so picking it up now is still useful!

LEVEL 17 - RANGER 8

8th level Rangers get another Ability Score Improvement. You’ve probably noticed our uneven Constitution score by this point: yeah that was because we were going to grab Resilient Constitution at some point. Increasing your CON gives you a nice +17 to your health and makes your Constitution saves (and concentration saves!) a +8 total.

You’ve also spent so much time on the ground moving through nonmagical difficult terrain costs you no extra movement thanks to Land’s Stride. You can also pass through nonmagical plants without being slowed by them or taking damage from them. Additionally, you have advantage on saving throws against plants that are magically created or manipulated to impede movement. You may be able to fly but that doesn’t mean being able to move on the ground isn’t useful!

(Artwork by AssasinMonkey on DeviantArt.)

LEVEL 18 - RANGER 9

9th level Rangers can learn third level spells, and you’ve probably spent enough time training with Rainbow Dash by this point to make a Wind Wall to protect your friends! (Basically the Ranger spell list sucks and we’re only really going down Ranger still for more subclass features.)

LEVEL 19 - RANGER 10

You get a new feature from Deft Explorer at this level: you are now Tireless! As an action you can give yourself a number of temporary hit points equal to 1d8 plus your Wisdom modifier (so 5.) You can use this action a number of times equal to your proficiency bonus, and regain all expended uses when you finish a long rest. Additionally whenever you finish a short rest your exhaustion level is decreased by 1.

You’re also a master of avoiding social interaction. Nature’s Veil lets you turn invisible as a Bonus Action until the start of your next turn. You can also use this feature a number of times equal to your proficiency bonus, and regain all expended uses when you finish a Long Rest.

LEVEL 20 - RANGER 11

11th level Beast Masters can invoke Bestial Fury! With 11 level in Ranger and 20 total levels in this build your Animal Companion can now... attack twice! Look Beast Master is playable now, I never said it was good.

At least you can learn one last Ranger spell: in your ultimate stand against darkness Daylight will help you banish the dark! ...Or something. Look again: the Ranger spell list sucks.

FINAL BUILD

PROS

You do not hurt my friends! You got that? - Even with the multiclassing you still get spell slots up to 7th level, and have more than enough magic to shake a stick at. Not to mention that Angel will always be by your side to pump out a bit more damage with your Bonus Action!

You’re the cutest thing ever - Maxed out Wisdom was rather expected from a Cleric, but Expertise in Animal Handling combined with unlimited Beast Speech means that you can easily make friends with any beast you come across! Just make sure your DM is okay with you giving a hydra belly rubs.

Whatever you wanna do is fine... - You’ve got quite a good mix of features that will help you both in and out of combat, meaning that there’s plenty that your friends can rely on you to help with! In fact there’s a lot of things that only you can do as a Ranger which are quite helpful!

CONS

You’re such a loudmouth... - Most of your class resources only come back after a Long Rest, with only your Channel Divinity coming back after a Short Rest. You’re still plenty capable with just Angel by your side but don’t spend everything in one fight, or else you’ll be left with nothing but Sacred Flame and Animal Companion attacks.

Are you coughing because... - So let’s talk about Angel: even with 11 levels in Ranger they’re not great. AC of 19 is pretty good but they’ll probably max out around 60 HP. Your average Wizard will have more HP than this by level 20. Two maul attacks will do decent damage but you could get equal value out of Spiritual Weapon, and you only get the second attack with Angel at total build level 20. And yeah for most of this build Angel is going to be sitting around 25 max HP, meaning they’re likely to go down a lot. Aid can help keep your pets healthy and happy but don’t be upset when your level 4 Ranger companion keeps going down.

Awful, just awful! - We kinda miss the best of both worlds for the sake of a build that’s “in-character.” No 10th level of Cleric means no Divine Intervention (even if it’s only a 10% chance it’s still good to have), and no 12th level of Ranger means no ASIs. One good thing about this build is that it does peak around level 10 or so where the multiclassing doesn’t start to damage it, but if you really expect to run all the way to level 20 I’d sooner play either a straight Ranger or a straight Cleric.

But you’re coming along to share your kindness with everypony around you, and guide your friends to victory! Use your expertise to keep your friends alive while Angel kicks some major tail! Get down and be assertive, but remember not to push yourself too hard. Everypony already loves you for who you are, even if you’re in fact a little shy.

(Artwork by Rodrigues404 on DeviantArt.)

[cherryeol04]

Stray Kids Playing Minecraft~

A/n: I hope you all enjoy, and if you liked, please leave a like! 💖💖💖💖

Tags: @straysrachaa @lordseochangbin @channiesmixtape @starryseung​ @felixsanxchatbot @jisungsjheekies​ @mrbangchannie

Chan

- doesn't know almost anything about Minecraft the first time around but he plays with you to make you happy

- you have to baby him for a while

- BUT THEN!

- He goes and learns about the game in his free time

- and then he pleasantly surprises you now that you he doesn't suck anymore

- and most peculiar of all

- he got really interested in redstone

- boi can make some INVENTIONS

- His house is like, fully automated - farm and all

- it makes you jealous but also very proud

- a pretty big pacifist

- shears, veggies and bread is all he needs

- he still big soft baby but he smart baby now

- also, would totally run around with a pumpkin on his head if you could still wear them in the latest version

Lee Know

- would kill everything that moves

- would hoard all the meat and refuse to give you any

- deforestation at its finest

- king of surplus

- playing with him is actually playing by yourself cuz he goes off on his own

- builds himself a goddamn empire!

- and no one knows where it is

- if he catches you inside his house without permission: shoot first, ask questions never

- mobs fear him, not the other way around

- will give you items cuz you're a charity cause

- actually shares when you both go mining though

- but let's face it, he's just OP

- would try to get all the cats

- totally to chase away creepers

- not because he wants an army of them or anything

- gets annoyed that he has to constantly fish because the cats keep taking them but won't be tamed by him

- he totally did not search for mine shafts just for name tags to name his cats

- DO NOT HURT HIS CATS

- or he'd cancel you in-game and irl too

Changbin

- would be super excited to play Minecraft with his friends

- he would be the first on the server to scout out the land and get resources

- however, no one warned him about night fall

- and all the creepy, scary things that spawned

- changbin lives in the ground now

- he dug a hole at the base of the mountain to take refuge during the night and never looked back

- normal person? No way! He was a mole now!

- the best at mining and interior rock design

- he would only resurface to seek out food and animals

- it was Changbin who stole all the cows and sheep, so you couldn't find them for felix

- he would have three large pins just next to his mountain

- lots of cows, rainbow sheep and pigs with saddles

- " uh...so I found these pins of animals and like...no house?"

- "What?"

- "I think the magical Minecraft fairy spawned it into the world?"

- "It's super weird. But I'm gonna kill some cows for their leather"

- "DON'T YOU TOUCH MY COWS!"

- and to your shock, a secret door in the mountain opens and Changbin comes running out

- the door made courtesy of Chan

- "He's got a diamond sword already?!?"

- it's the last thing you scream as he kills you for being near his cows

- and after a round of feeding and breeding, he disappears back into his hole

Hyunjin

- would only be about building

- he would be the first one to have a diamond pickaxe just so he could mine cobblestone faster

- would also get efficiency V just so he could speed run through the mines

- would wander through different biomes for days to collect clay so he could make concrete

- and while you're busy actually playing the game, he would beg for you to pick flowers on your trip so he can dye the concrete different colors

- his first house would be a mansion

- but he would give up half way because he kept falling off the roof and dying

- would forget he is actually playing the game and would get scared when night falls and mobs start spawning in his unlit house

- not like you didn't tell him countless times to put down torches

- but he kept saying they ruined his aesthetic

- but now he keeps dying because mobs are literally waiting at his spawn point, killing him over and over and over again

- and he begs you to set the time to day and kill the mobs for him

- but you just laugh uncontrollably at him because karma really is a bitch

- but in the end, he ends up making an entire city, and invites the others to come and play on the server.

Jisung

- would be just like Chan

- a pure ass baby when it comes to playing minecraft, but super eager to play the game

- his first spawn would be in the middle of the night (because of server)

- and you would try to tell him to not leave the safety of spawn, but he just wouldn't listen

- "Listen, Y/n, I know what I'm doing! I'm a pro at this!"

- and he would run confidently into the night, like the actual idiot that he is

- he wouldn't get too far before he was attacked by all the mobs and got killed

- "Well that was just rude!"

- "Oh my god Jisung, I told you not to do it."

- "Well how was I supposed to know they were going to kill me?!"

- and you can only shake your head at his stupidity

- he would eventually wait until daytime, but unfortunately all of his items would be lost due to despawning

- it's not like either one of you were equipped to go and retrieve his items

- zombies sucked man! And skeletons are the worst!

- but with a new day comes a new adventure and you both head out to find a place to call home

- Jisung would run the entire way, even though he had no food to keep his hunger up

- he also wouldn't be paying attention to where he was going and would fall into a hole

- a very BIG hole

- 'J.One fell from a high place'

- "Really Jisung?"

- "I couldn't see it!"

- playing with Jisung would be a very challenging task, because he would never learn

- because by the time he had diamond armor and ready to fight the wither, he would have fallen from fifteen cliffs, twenty holes in caves and three ravines

- "Jisung if you die one more time I swear to god!"

- 'J.One fell from a high place'

- "That's it! I quit!"

Felix

- You would be so hyped to play with Felix

- You've seen him play other games, so you knew he'd be great at minecraft

- Getting the server had been his idea, the easiest way everyone could play together

- First day of spawn, Felix would already be listing off the things that you would need to accomplish

- wood, cobblestone, iron, seeds, sheep

- it was all just so overwhelming

- by the time you make your first complete set of wooden tools, felix would have iron tools already

- he'd been ten feet underground, digging for more resources while tasking you to find the animals for food, wool and feathers

- easier said then done

- and when he resurfaces and you don't have animals, he would simply sigh and go do it himself

- which would upset you because you would spend hours looking for just one god damn cow

- meanwhile, Felix would take five steps in one direction and come across hundreds of cows!!!

- WHERE DID ALL THESE COWS COME FROM?!?!?

- he'd travel the whole map just to find a jungle to get coco beans

- seriously though, how did he find the fucking jungle?

- it like doesn't exist

- except it does and Minho most likely lives there with all his cats

- Also, there's pandas!!!!!

- Felix would try and tame a panda, even though it's not possible

- When not trying to show off, Felix would be in his crappy little hut (cause hyunjin was still making the city), making cookies and cakes because why wouldn't he?

- at least he shares, unlike someone.....

- Felix would be absolutely unstoppable at the game, while you struggle to get to iron level armor (while trying to keep Jisung alive)

- Felix would have just a big ego

- it's okay though. One strike from Seungmin's sword and he'd be put back into his place

- Revenge is a dish best served Seungmin.

Seungmin

- the worst of the worst

- he would be the one to pretend to not know the game

- but really, he would be a minecraft expert

- read: troll

- every chance he would get, Seungmin would try to do something to ruin your day

- don't ever go mining with him. EVER!

- he would be the one to lead over a creeper to you in a ravine while you're trying to mine diamonds, right next to a lava pool

- the first one to explode wouldn't do any damage, thankfully

- "Don't you dare bring a creeper over here!"

- "I wouldn't."

- somehow, you wouldn't be convinced

- but you decided to trust him

- y/n clown

- you're just mining away at the diamond when a big explosion happens

- and you notice two things

- 1. the diamonds and the surrounding area were blown up

- 2. you were now in the pool of lava, dying

- meanwhile, Seungmin was running away, cackling like the evil little shit that he was

- the holy terror, that's what they would call him

- he would purposefully go out and fight creepers just to gather their gunpowder so he could make dynamite

- no one was safe from him

- except Minho

- because no one knew where he was

I.N.

- Jeongin would spend at least two days researching things for the game before actually playing

- he would want to have some knowledge before walking into hell that was the Stray Kids server

- it's okay though, because everyone loves Jeongin

- really, he wouldn't need to do a thing

- diamond armor, enchanted? check

- enchanted weapons? check

- his own cat and dog? double check

- everyone would do anything for this baby

- but Jeongin isn't one to mooch *coughJisungcough*

- even with all his presents, he would still start with the basics of punching a tree

- while others have found this skills in cooking, mining, falling into holes, redstone and building

- jeongin would be more interested in potions and enchanting

- YOU'RE A WIZARD INNIE!

- Jeongin would quickly master potion brewing

- even if it meant battling the scary blazes in the nether

- huh, so that's why Changbin was screaming so much

- he would be hired by Minho to make him potions of breathing so he could go claim an ocean monument

- Jeongin would only do it if he could help

- surprisingly Minho agrees and for the first time in 84 years, everyone gets to see Minho's character

[moonlit-jeno]

love sick

Chapter 9- Jaemin

pairing: nct dream ‘00 line + reader

genre/warnings: angst, fluff, character death

words: 3.5k

summary:

He could have prevented both of their deaths. He should have prevented both of their deaths. But he didn’t.

He wonders what that means for the rest of them

masterlist | prev | next

Renjun used to always say that time was an illusion. Granted, he was normally joking in response to Jaemin yelling at him for being late, but his words have never felt truer than right now. The days blend together, differentiated only by the routine house change and the occasional food run.

Right now he’s inside some store that is somehow still entirely intact, shelves stocked with rows and rows of food. His stomach growls. “What if we stayed here?” Jeno looks up from the package of green bread that he’s observing. “What, you mean like overnight?” “Yeah. It would make sense, right? Shit ton of food. Plus it’s sheltered, and I’m sure we could figure out the furniture situation.” He muses, observing the aisles. Jeno makes a noise of agreement.

“That’s actually not a bad idea. Let’s throw some food in the car before we talk to y/n and Hyuck about it.” Jaemin does his best to grab foods with the most nutritional value, which is hard when it’s all packaged. He nearly throws up when he gets to the meat section, all of it rotting away inside the glass cases. There are some yogurts that are still good and he calls out to Jeno, laughing as the boy pushes the cart and then jumps on the back, pretending to fly. 

Something pulls in his chest, the scene reminding him of the day it all started. Flashbacks pop up behind his eyes and he takes a deep breath, mechanically throwing yogurts into the cart to distract himself.

He’s so lost in his head that he doesn’t realize Jeno’s calling his name until the guy grabs his wrist. “Jaemin? You good?” Jaemin blinks and looks from his wrist to the elder, then down to the cart. It’s pretty much filled with yogurts, several containers on the floor, rolling down the aisles. He didn’t realize how aggressively he was throwing them. “Yeah, sorry. Distracted.” Jeno nods and lets go of his wrist after a minute. “Alright. Come on, let’s get back to the car.”

They’re about four aisles away from the exit when they hear it. The sound of sneakers scuffling along the floor, a loud pop as a bag is presumably stepped on. Jaemin’s eyes widen and both boys freeze, making terrified eye contact. “What do we do?” Jaemin mouths, trying his best not to make a sound. They’re way too far from the entrance to make it. Jeno gives him a look that says “Why are you asking me?” and shrugs helplessly.

The footsteps have stopped and the store is now eerily quiet, every other sound drowned out by the frantic beating of Jaemin’s heart. He grabs the gun out of the cart, looking back at Jeno. Jeno nods, creeping forward slowly with him. He uses one arm to push Jeno behind him.

His head is pounding and he’s breathing too loud, but the more he tries to calm himself, the more he freaks out. They peer into one aisle, finding it empty. Jaemin doesn’t know whether to feel relieved or not.

The next aisle is just as empty. Jaemin’s beginning to wonder whether they just imagined the sound. He hopes they did. There are only two aisles left until they can bolt to the car.

Jaemin slowly peers into the next aisle, eyes widening as he’s met with the barrel of a gun. His heart stops beating and he stands frozen. Jeno makes a noise behind him and he snaps back into himself, raising his own gun jerkily.

“Are you infected?” The person behind the gun demands, nudging Jaemin’s forehead with the the point of it when Jaemin takes too long to respond.

“N-no. No, we’re not.” His voice breaks and he has to clear his throat, try again. 

Jeno’s hand brushes over his arm, gripping onto it tightly, and Jaemin flinches. “Are sure?” Jaemin’s eyes are zeroed in on the finger on the trigger, how it twitches ever so slightly. “Yes, we’re fucking sure! We’re not infected!” 

There’s a moment where Jaemin is sure he’s about to die, but then the gun is lowered, and Jaemin is face to face with a boy who looks to be no older than Jaemin. He smiles brightly at them. “Hi! I’m Chenle. Jisung’s hiding somewhere.” It contrasts the mood so starkly that all Jaemin can do is stare at him before breaking into a nervous laughter. “Uh, okay. Okay, cool. We’re gonna leave now.” “Are you going to take anything? Or were you just visiting to admire the place?” Chenle asks, tucking the gun into his waistband before raising his eyebrows at them. Jaemin flushes, looking back at Jeno. Jeno looks ready to fight the kid. “We were grabbing food before you decided to hold us at gunpoint.” Jeno explains through clenched teeth.

“Hey, you also technically held me at gunpoint.” He motions to the gun still clenched in Jaemin’s hand. Jaemin startles and tucks the gun into his own waistband. He’d forgotten he had it.

“Right. Great meeting you, we’re leaving now.” Jeno turns to go back and grab the cart, Jaemin following. They rush towards the exit, but Chenle follows them. “Where are you headed?” He asks. “There aren’t too many places left to go.”

Jaemin shrugs, glancing out the window before pausing. “Dunno. We’ll figure it out later.” The guy doesn’t say anything in response. Jaemin waits a moment, but Jeno nudges him with the cart to keep him moving. He turns to leave.

They’re halfway out the door when another voice calls out to them. “Wait! Take us with you.” Another boy stands next to Chenle. He’s taller, has a deeper voice, but somehow manages to cower behind his friend. Something pulls in Jaemin’s chest at the sight.

“And why would we do that?” Jeno asks, eyeing the pair up and down. “We don’t know you.” “But we’re trustworthy.” Chenle shrugs. “And I’m good with a gun.” Jaemin can tell Jeno is done with this conversation. “Great. We’re good with guns, too.” “Not really. I just saw your gun skills and I’ve gotta say, they’re kind of lacking.” Jisung says. Jaemin feels a little attacked. 

“Still a no.” Jeno says at the same time that Jaemin says “Fine.” They turn to face each other. “What?” Jaemin makes a series of facial expressions and gestures that he hopes convey that he doesn’t want to leave these two alone and helpless. Jeno returns the expressions, his exasperation growing until he groans. “Fine. We have two other people with us, we’ll let them decide.”

Chenle and Jisung stay inside while Jeno and Jaemin take the cart out to the car. “This is a bad idea.” Jeno grumbles, glaring at Jaemin. “What if they rob us?” “Why would they do that?” Jaemin asks in place of answering. The fact that he can’t confidently say that they won’t rob them should be concerning. Jeno raises his eyebrow as Jaemin. “This is an apocalypse, Jaem. Why wouldn’t they do that?”

“Took you long enough.” Donghyuck says when they get to the car, hopping out to help them chuck the food in the back. There’s no annoyance in his tone, though. He sounds relieved. You hop out to join them.

“Yeah, well. We met a couple people.” Jaemin sighs, trying to figure out how to tell you and Hyuck what happened without raising concern. He focuses on the food as he recounts everything, not wanting to see your expressions.

You and Donghyuck are gaping at him when he finishes, twin looks of disbelief on your face. “And you want to take them with us? Are you insane?” Donghyuck asks, voice shrill. “Clearly, he is.” Jeno says. Both boys glance at you, probably expecting you to agree with them. You bite your lip. “Oh God. Don’t tell me you’re considering it. What if they rob us?” “I mean, it might not be a bad thing? Don’t forget, the only reason we know each other is because you broke into my house.” You point out.

Donghyuck scoffs. “Of course you would want more guys to come with us.” Your expression falls, hurt written all over your face. Jeno rolls his eyes. “I thought we were past this, Hyuck.” “Fine.” Donghyuck waves his hand and saunters back into the car. “Bring them out here, I guess it won’t hurt to talk to them.” Jaemin runs back to grab Jisung and Chenle, trying to appear threatening as he warns them not to pull any funny business. Naturally, you and Donghyuck look suspicious, gazes calculated as you analyze them. “Why do you want to come with us?” You ask the first question, looking scarily intimidating. Jaemin almost forgot how you acted when you first met them, grilling them about the zombie apocalypse that you didn’t believe in.

Chenle answers with his head held high. “We’ve been stuck here since the whole thing started. We don’t have a car, and there’s no way that we can travel on foot without dying.”

“How did you get here in the first place, then? And how is it that there’s no one else with you?” Your gaze is intimidating enough that Jaemin’s shaking and he’s not even the one being questioned. Jisung seems to try to shrink behind Chenle, who doesn’t even look fazed.

“This is my dad’s store. I used to open it sometimes, but I hated going alone so I brought Jisung with me. There’s no one else inside because I got a call the day everything went down, telling me to lock up and protect myself.” 

You narrow your eyes at him, scanning, before nodding to yourself. “Alright.” It looks like you’re about to agree to let them come with, but then you pause, eyebrows furrowing. “Wait. We walked into the store just fine. You’re seriously going to tell me that no one else tried to break in?” ”No, they did. I shot them.” Chenle smiles sarcastically. “You’re welcome.” The corner of your mouth twitches up and you hold his gaze for a moment before turning to the rest of your group. “Okay. I’m good with them.” “You’re not going to backstab us, are you?” Donghyuck asks them. Both boys shake their heads, hands held up. “We won’t, we swear.” The answer seems to satisfy Donghyuck. He nods at Jaemin.

Jeno’s the last one, but he ends up caving. “Fine. Don’t make us regret this.” Chenle and Jisung both smile. “Thank you! You won’t regret it.” They go to hop in the car but Jeno stops them with an outstretched hand. 

“Gun.” Chenle’s smile falters, but he hands the weapon over. Jeno turns to Jisung. “You too.” “I don’t have one.” Jisung replies. Jeno moves to pat him down and Jisung flinches back. Jeno levels him with a stare. Chenle squeezes Jisung’s hand reassuringly, and Jisung slowly relaxes.

Jeno pats him down quickly, taking note of the setting sun. He doesn’t find any other weapons. “Alright. Off we go.”

Jisung and Chenle end up making a great addition to the group. They seem to be complete opposites. Jisung barely talks and Chenle barely shuts up, his voice loud and laugh even louder. It only serves to make their interactions funnier to the rest of them. 

Chenle almost reminds Jaemin of Renjun, with his quick wit and sharp tongue. And Jisung is so timid and awkward that Jaemin can’t help but to basically adopt him. He’s two years younger than Jaemin and he quickly becomes the younger brother he never had.

Donghyuck never fails to join in on the teasing, Chenle cackling as you and Jeno watch from the side. Jaemin notices that you’re a bit more closed off from the two new boys, not that it’s hard to figure out why. You probably figure that Donghyuck’s ready to jump down your throat any chance he gets (he is). Plus, you’re already distant with him and Jeno. Why would you be welcome to newcomers?

Jeno’s a different story. He’s surprisingly fine with Chenle, finding the kid hilarious. Jisung… not so much. 

Maybe it has to do with the time Jeno made a bad joke and Jisung called him boring. Or maybe it’s like Donghyuck said: Jeno’s jealous of the attention Jaemin’s giving Jisung. It’s kind of funny to him, watching the older boy pout as Jaemin pinches Jisung’s cheeks.

Jisung has a little wallet sized calendar that he keeps with him, checking off the days to keep track of time. It’s a little disheartening to see just how long it’s been since the beginning of the end, that day marked with an x and a frowny face. There’s a smiley face on one of the days from last month.

“What’s this?” Jaemin asks, tapping the day with his index finger. Jisung looks over, confused, and then flushes red. He mumbles something inaudible. “What?” “That’s the day Chenle and I joined you guys.” Jisung looks away, clearly embarrassed, but the gesture’s so sweet and innocent that Jaemin’s heart warms.

Jaemin reaches over to pinch his cheeks, cooing at him. Jisung yelps and tries to bat his hand away. “Aww, you marked down the day that we met? Cute.” 

Donghyuck hears the chaos and runs over, attacking hugging Jisung from the back. “You really like us that much?” Chenle cackles as you and Jeno watch, laughing from the sidelines. There’s something different about your smile as you watch them. It’s brighter, happier than Jaemin’s seen you look in a while. It lifts his spirits even higher, if that was possible.

The house that they’re in right now is tiny, not leaving for a lot of space. It doesn’t really provide much shelter either; the walls are thin and there’s a draft that seeps in and chills him to the bone. There aren’t enough blankets for all of them so they have to improvise, snuggling up to each other. Jisung and Chenle are curled together across the room. You’re sandwiched between Jaemin and Jeno, Hyuck hugging Jeno from behind. You’re facing Jeno, which is fine, except that means that no one is hugging Jaemin and he’s cold. His eyelids are heavy and he feels dead tired but he can’t get comfortable enough to fall asleep. He’s about to get up and pull Hyuck on top of him when he hears it.

There’s a noise from across the room, a loud growl that has Jaemin bolting upright, looking around wildly for intruders. He doesn’t find anyone. 

Someone whispers an apology from across the room. Jaemin squints his eyes, trying to see in the dark, and Jisung sits up. The kid laughs sheepishly. “That was my stomach.” “Jesus, you scared me.” Jaemin stands. “Come on, let's get you some food. What do you want?” “A baguette.” Jisung doesn’t even hesitate. Jaemin raises his eyebrows, reaching forward to poke him in the side. “Kidding! I want oatmeal.” Jaemin boils the water while Jisung pulls a package of oats out of the box. He must accidentally splash Jisung with the boiling water when because he groans when Jaemin is pouring the water into the bowl.

“Shit, sorry.” “Hmm? That wasn’t me.” Jisung sounds confused. “Oh. Must’ve been Jeno, he snores sometimes.” Jaemin shrugs it off, but then they hear the noise again. It sounds closer, and it’s accompanied by a banging. His heart drops to his stomach. “Shit. Shit, grab whatever you can, we’ve gotta go.” Their escape this time is harder. It’s dark, for one, so none of them can see what’s happening. Plus they’re all half asleep. Jaemin almost loses his mind trying to explain the situation to a non comprehending Jeno.

“Jesus Christ, pay attention. There are zombies here. We heard them like, a minute ago. We need to leave.” 

You all huddle together at the front door, Jeno clicking the key to unlock the car ahead of time. Jeno runs them through it, yawning midway through his speech. “We run, we jump into the car, and that’s it. Don’t take time to get comfortable. As soon as your ass hits the seat, you scoot over and slam the doors shut. Ready?”

The grass is wet and Jaemin groans as he realizes he doesn’t have shoes, the mud slimy between his toes. It’s a miracle he doesn’t fall.

It’s another miracle that the zombies fall. They may be strong but they’re not too coordinated, and Jaemin glances back to see one running at them, only to slip and land on its face. It would be funny if it weren’t so damn terrifying.

Everyone piles into the car successfully, Jeno slamming his foot on the gas and speeding off. Jaemin turns to look around the car. “Everyone okay?” Murmured agreements sound around the vehicle, and Jaemin sinks back into his seat in relief. The SUV only fits five people, Jisung being the unlucky one sitting in the trunk. There’s plenty of space back there and the boy has a clear view of the rest of them, so it’s not that bad.

Somehow the car is more comfortable than the house and Jaemin finds himself drifting off, heavy eyelids finally resting. He’s just about to fall asleep when he feels a bang, an annoying beeping sound filling the car. Jaemin fights the urge to throw himself out of the car. “Alright, who doesn’t have their seatbelt on?”

“Fuck, Jaemin, that’s not the seatbelt sign. The trunk’s open.” Jeno swears. “What? But it’s closed.” You say, turning around to look back. Jaemin’s about to agree when suddenly the trunk flies up. Jisung screams and reaches forward to grab the headrest. 

There’s an awful growling sound and suddenly the serene atmosphere is shifted into chaos. You yell Jaemin’s name and hand him a gun. Donghyuck and Chenle are both trying to pull Jisung into the backseat, the lanky boy having trouble fitting. He’s just about over when he lets out another scream, being pulled backwards with such force that he’s ripped out of their grips. Jisung just barely manages to grab onto the headrest.

“Get it off of me!” Jaemin’s eyes widen as he meets Jisung’s panicked expression and he swings the gun up, finger on the trigger. There’s a malformed hand around Jisung’s ankle and Jaemin makes the mistake of following the hand to the rest of his body. It’s a zombie, he knows it’s a zombie, can hear Jisung screaming for help, and yet…

All he sees when he looks at the face is Renjun. He gapes at the sight in front of him as he’s suddenly thrown back to a week ago, to Renjun sitting on the grass as he awaited his death. To months ago, the boy cackling as Jaemin woke up to find the scribbles left by a Sharpie and a bored Renjun.

He falters. There’s yelling in the background but it all blurs together in Jaemin’s ears until someone grabs his shoulder and screams “What are you doing?” That brings him back into the present and suddenly everything snaps back into focus. The zombie isn’t Renjun.

Jaemin raises the gun to shoot but it’s too late. Jisung screams bloody murder as he’s dragged out of the SUV, hands trying desperately to get a grip on anything that could possibly save him.

“No!” Jaemin throws himself forward to grab Jisung’s hand, but it’s too late. He watches in horror as Jisung’s body lands on the road, zombies swarming around him. It’s a gruesome sight, and he vaguely registers Chenle take the gun from him, watches as the remaining zombies fall to the ground. There’s a hand gripping his shoulder, keeping him in place, and it’s only then that he realizes he’s screaming, body trying to launch him after Jisung.

They eventually pull over to shut the trunk and get gas. It’s probably his turn to drive but nobody mentions it, not with the state that he’s in. His eyes are locked on the rear window, the scene replaying over and over in his head.

The panic in Jisung’s eyes. The desperation with which he clawed at the back of the seat. The fucking screams he was letting out as he begged, pleaded with Jaemin to save him. Because he could’ve saved him.

He should have saved him. It’s his fault. If he hadn’t frozen up, Jisung would still be alive. And why did he freeze up? Because he thought he saw his dead friend? It shouldn’t have mattered if it was Renjun, because it wouldn’t really have been Renjun. He would’ve had to shoot him anyways. But he didn’t.

It’s his fault Jisung’s dead. This is the second person he’s killed so far. Even if he wasn’t the one who dragged Jisung out of the car. Even if he wasn’t the one who turned Renjun or shot him in the head. He could’ve prevented their deaths. It’s his fault.

He wonders what that means for the rest of them.

[ninakaina]

sigh. another resident evil ada plot post. this time my thesis is “resident evil 6 is some of the best horror in resident evil and mainstream video games as a whole, the world just wasn’t ready for it because it’s a psychological horror in a game they expect survival horror from, but ada differs from the other re main characters (chris and leon) because she is able to think critically about complex concepts and rarely struggles to survive in any situation, leading to a more mature story, you literally just don’t give ada’s re6 campaign the credit it deserves”

like, okay, so you find out that your war criminal boss who creeped on you 15 years ago has been watching you and anonymously contacting you to work for him. you contact him and he tells you that the answers can be found in an isolated location. you go to the location. you find that your fingerprint is in the security system. you, who have coped badly with trauma by thinking of your body and name as a different person than you since at least 1998, find evidence of a mission carried out by you under his command that you have no memory of. you’re told that a series of terror attacks are going to be carried out by you.

you go to the first location to be attacked, and it is attacked, but not by you. you run into your on again off again boyfriend and he’s freaked out by you. after saving him, you break into an underground lab run by your ex-boss’s evil secret society and find a vhs tape labeled with your name, which your friend saw before he ran into you. the tape shows you hatching out of a zombie egg, but you know you didn’t hatch out of a zombie egg. you realize that you haven’t actually been in contact with the guy, but an unknown person who has your body and name is pretending to be him to manipulate you and is committing acts of terror under your name.

you go to the next targeted location. through an apocalypse, soldiers are hunting for you, and you overhear them reporting sightings of you via radio, but you aren’t at the places where they saw you. you follow their updates on your location. you find out that your ex-boss went white boy crazy when you left him and killed thousands of women in an attempt to turn them into a copy of you that would love him. you realize many of the monsters you’ve been fighting were once intended to be you, and that the attempt to turn them into you made them into what they are.

you realize that the woman with your face was once a scientist your ex-boss had manipulated since she was 15, and who helped create the project to copy you out of devotion to him, before he turned on her and made her into a test subject. being forced to be you, or specifically the persona you created for yourself, has driven her insane and now she wants to destroy the world that destroyed her. but beneath it, she’s also come to see the harm she’s done with her work, and somewhere deep down she wants you to help her and to stop her— she sought you out and led you to all this information, after all.

you meet her when she’s killed. you tell her body (your body) you’re sorry for what happened to her, and that if she had only wanted to get revenge against the man who hurt her, you would have helped her. her body tells you she never needed your help, because she’s the real you. she then possesses the ship you’re on, forcing you to fight your way through an army of half-formed copies of yourself calling you your abuser’s name. your hands are reaching for you from the walls and giant melting copies of your own face say “i’m the real ada wong, you’re a pretender!” when you finally blow up your giant face before it eats you, your job isn’t done.

you go find your ex-boss, who the other you mutated into a monster to make him feel how she did, and kill him a little, but not before he says some of the most fucked up stuff to you and almost tramples you to death. you leave your friends, not answering their question of “what are you”, to finish him off. you give them an escape route and all the information they need to clear their names, but none of the information that would clear yours. you go to the other you’s lab and destroy all evidence that she ever wasn’t you. i could theorize about the significance of this but i won’t. you find a final zombie egg that she described as her greatest creation. a human-looking hand reaches out. you destroy it. you get a phone call. someone has a new job for you. you take it. how is this not at least as good as any given silent hill game

[musical-chick-13]

And Theon bc I love him

WHAT A COINCIDENCE I LOVE HIM TOO (this answer is gonna be a combination of books and show)

Send me a character and I’ll tell you the following:

• Did they live up to their potential? / In what ways was their potential unachieved?

-I would say yes. The only negative I have about his general arc is his death (which, see below). But Theon from the very beginning was, though not a particularly nice person, still relatable. Feeling othered, wanting to be accepted by an immediate environment that doesn’t accept you, isolated from and ostracized by your family, and the tension that comes between serving the different types of familial relationships in your life. Theon has no idea who he is, tossed aside by his blood family for not growing up with them and being “soft,” aka sort-of moral and having emotions that aren’t selfish rage or smugness (which, yep, that second part is a mood, see: my entire childhood and how no one wanted to be around an “emotional” “soft” child). And from there, he spirals out of control in a way that, while certainly not admirable by any stretch of the imagination, is still understandable in the context of the narrative and his characterization. And from there, after going through hell and quite literally losing himself (even to the point of straight-up denying rescue), he builds himself back up gradually, to the point where he expressed extreme regret for what he’s done, helps an innocent woman escape a truly horrifying situation, acknowledges that his family is generally garbage, and (in-show b/c again books aren’t finished), helping to restore his sister to power, rescuing her after his PTSD relapses while confronting Euron, and ultimately opting to protect the Starks come hell or high water in order to genuinely atone for what he’s done. He is no longer conflicted because he wants to do the right thing, and that right thing is defending the kingdom from the White Walkers and making sure Sansa and Bran are safe. And it’s no longer about fulfilling a duty or finding a family to fill the void. Because now he has found himself. I will contend that Theon has one of the best, most nuanced, most organic redemption arcs of all time. I will forever be grateful that I got to see that piece of storytelling unfold.

Although, I would love to know what he thought of Dany. A missed opportunity, that.

• How they negatively and positively affected the story.

-Positive: His arc of identity and finding where your loyalties lie ties into the overall theme of “How do you find yourself in a world where goodness, authenticity, and honesty are often punished and increasingly rare?” And it proves that governmental politics aren’t the only defining factors in decisions: familial politics can be just as difficult and dangerous, which adds yet another rich, complicated layer to the overall story. He has a genuine, honest-to-Drowned-God redemption arc, which is...not really present anywhere else in the story (no, Jaime is not on a Redemption Quest, I will die on this hill). But I think the biggest draw of Theon’s presence is that it deconstructs the whole “Character Revenge Fantasy” idea. He does bad things. We want him to be punished. But not like that. No one deserves that. How far is too far? What does retribution really look like? Given how easily that idea can be abused and go off the rails, is retribution even something to strive for? What is the point of using extreme violence/torture/mutilation/breaking someone’s psyche when it doesn’t really accomplish anything? Isn’t atonement and genuine justice a better option? It certainly was for Theon. He could only piece himself back together and do anything meaningful once he was out of his abusive environment. All of these are imporant questions that are posed by his existence in the narrative.

-Negative: Idk if I have much to say here. My biggest problem is his death (see below), but that’s not really a negative story effect so much as...being disappointing and narratively irrelevant. I gotta say, his introduction via his sister was...really weird. I genuinely have no idea why GRRM wrote that. It never came up again or had any kind of narrative ramifications and kind of cast a strange, uncomfortable light on his relationship with Asha/Yara for the remainder of the story. I can ignore and enjoy their later relationship it if I don’t think about it too hard, though, so I guess I’ll chalk it up to GRRM having a Bad Idea.

• What my favorite arc for them is.

-All of it?? Theon’s journey is kind of...one big arc, which is why I think it works so well. He has this overarching redemption plot which spans the entire series and informs every decision he makes (for good or for bad, depending on where in the aforementioned journey he is). The redemption arc isn’t bogged down with side plots or other pieces of narrative clutter, meaning it has time to grow and, thus, be gradual and realistic. If I had to choose a specific point, it’s probably when he tries to reintegrate back into society via supporting Yara. Gaining the Iron Islands’ support for her ruling, spiriting away with Euron’s fleet, and ultimately rescuing his sister after her capture. He can’t just go back into society. He’s scared. He has really bad PTSD. But he recognizes that putting his home in good hands is something bigger than just him because it’s Yara’s home, too. I just...I really love family relationships, y’all.

• What I think of their ending.

-I’m not really sure how I feel about this one. I get that the series is GrimDark™ and that people who make the right choice and fight for good die all the time, but Theon dying just felt...wrong. To me.

And, like...I get it. It makes sense to parallel his original descent into villainy (cemented by executing those two boys and pretending they were Bran and Rickon) with him dying to protect Bran himself. It ties into the whole very common trope of completing a full redemption arc by committing a completely selfless act at great personal cost. It’s kind of like the whole Missy thing in Doctor Who (which...hoo boy, that post is coming, make no mistake), where selfishness is directly opposed by making the ultimate sacrifice with no motivation for personal gain. And the fact that the last words he ever heard were “You’re a good man?” I cannot even begin to describe how much that makes me sob. But...honestly, I’m really tired of this idea that redemption has to end in death in order to be achieved or “complete.” I think it’s much more poignant to have a redeemed character live to help build a better world. Because what’s the point of telling people to be better if the “reward” is death? No one’s going to want to reform themselves if they think that’ll be the result.

I think the thing that Bugs Me™ the most is that Theon never really got to have a moment of peace when he was alive. Sansa gained the North’s love and at least had a secure childhood. Ned and Cat were happily married for years. Arya had parents who loved her and a good relationship with Jon. Jon fell in love with Ygritte and found his Night Watch Bros, and Robb (in show verse) had some very happy moments with Talisa. Davos put great stock in what he considered fulfilling friendships with Stannis and Shireen; Brienne was treated respectfully by Renly, Catelyn, and Sansa; Missandei and Grey Worm had each other and their friendship with Dany, who herself had many personal successes in her quest for the Iron Throne and saw the death of her abusive brother. Cersei even had moments with Jaime (who himself had several notable military victories and at least some time with Myrcella, as well as being gladly and deeply in love, however dysfunctional that love was), times when she successfully fought off enemies (including her dad), and some sweet moments with Tommen, as well as a huge victory via blown-up sept at the end of season 6. Theon was treated as a second-class family member by the Starks his whole life by being “traded” to them as a condition of war resolution AS A BABY, is immediately disparaged and mistreated by his immediate family when he tries to return to them, makes terrible decisions that almost cost him his conscience completely, is brutally tortured by Ramsay, is on the run with his sister from Euron almost immediately after, and has a PTSD attack that ultimatly results in him having to launch a rescue mission. And then he fights ice zombies. And then he dies. He never really...got to be happy at all? There was never any kind of “win” for him. Not even survival. The narrative couldn’t even give him that.

TLDR: Theon’s death seemed less shock-value-y than others (like, for example, Shireen or Missandei or, heck, Melisandre even), and it isn’t the worst thing I’ve ever seen. It’s narratively-informed and it makes sense as an emotional through-line, but, ultimately, Redemption Cemented By Selfless Death is a tired trope, and I honestly thought this story (which...you know...serves as a deconstruction of common fantasy tropes/book tropes in general) was better than that.

• When I wish they had died. / If I think they should’ve died.

-So here’s where we get personal™ kids.

So, it’s no secret that I am...severely mentally ill. I’ve talked about expression/presentation of mental illness in regard to Cersei a lot on this blog, and how that (as paradoxical as it may seem) helped bring a sense of comfort and emotional resonance to me. Theon, post-Ramsay, has, I think, a very clear case of PTSD. Theon is one of the few characters I’ve seen where his mental illness isn’t the cause of the bad, violent, dangerous choices he makes. It only takes root after he has made the decision and conscious effort to better himself, and it, rather than demonizing him, serve to humanize him. His trauma didn’t define him. And although a PTSD attack led to him unintentionally losing Yara to Euron’s capture, he makes every effort to rescue her, a goal he does end up achieving. It is so rare I get to see a character who goes through these things, successfully fight them and come out with positive qualities at the end. Like...switching topics a bit here, Jaime going back to King’s Landing to (try to) escape and ultimately die with Cersei made sense to me because, as Jaime says, he is a hateful man. He never made much of an honest effort to be anything else. And he never truly wanted to be good; he just wanted to be liked. He wanted to adopt some personality that would make him feel less disconnected from the rest of the world. But Theon...genuinely feels remorse for everything he’s done. He makes a concerted effort to do everything in his power to improve the lives of people he believes are good and deserve to be safe. So, just...killing him off in a Completely Selfless Sacrifice (like...you know how a lot of mentally ill people put themselves through suffering-like OCD rituals, bottling feelings, self-harm, even suicide-in a misplaced attempt to “help” or “protect other people”) seemed antithetical to everything we saw of his arc.

Ultimately, with such a humanizing, empathetic portrayal of trauma and mental health struggles, seeing Theon be killed off just...pissed me off. I am so tired of seeing mentally ill characters die. I really want to believe that I can live through and thrive in spite of the things that afflict me, and I get example after example of characters not being allowed to do that. It feels awful, quite frankly. And it makes hope that much harder. 

I also just feel like...there was nothing the story gained from his death? I get the thematic parallels as mentioned earlier, but it didn’t really move the story forward in any significant way. It didn’t motivate other characters to do anything, it had no political ramifications, it didn’t serve to contribute to any kind of happy ending or commentary on society, it just...was sad. Again, I thought this story was better than that.

[rhysand-vs-fenrys]

Could you do a thing about who The Untamed characters are? Your weekly posts and such are good, but I was wondering what their context is?

-Sure!! I’ll put it under a “Keep Reading” so it doesn’t flood anyone’s dash :)

**I usually reblog Untamed asks to my Untamed fandom page as well, so this note is for followers of Wuxian-vs-Wangji:: I’m avoiding spoilers in these descriptions and trying to simplify things into a format non-viewers can follow, so please do not comment with spoilers.

I also limited the list of characters to those in 10+ episodes, which left some fan favorites off the list.

Main & Major Characters Throughout the Story::

Wei Wuxian // Wei Ying (Informal Name) // Yiling Patriarch (The Sage of the Burial Mounds)

Think... Battlemage Necromancer.

Uses the dark flute Chenqing to draw out and command the hate and resentful energy of the dead, weaponizing it against his enemies.

Adopted by the Yunmeng-Jiang Clan Leader after his mother (a rogue cultivator) and father (a beloved Jiang servant) were killed in a monster hunt.

Considered by Jiang Yanli and Jiang Cheng to be no different from a blood sibling.

Killed on the Cliffs of Heavenly Nightless by his brother Jiang Cheng while committing suicide in the first 5 minutes of the show; Resurrected via a rare and dangerous spell by madman Mo Xuanyu 16 years later.

In the Present Arc, Wei Wuxian dons a mask so others will not recognize him (laughably the mask fools absolutely no one but he Commits to the Look) and pretends to be the insane outcast Mo Xuanyu.

Lan Wangji // Lan Zhan (Informal Name) //  Hanguang-Jun (The Light-Bearing Lord)

As younger brother to the so-far childless Clan Leader of the Gusu-Lan, he is the Clan Heir and commands a position of high power and respect worldwide.

As he and his older brother are seen as the pride and joy of the Lan Clan, they are referred to worldwide as “The Twin Jades of Lan”.

Considered a paragon of righteousness and virtue.

Joyless, friendless, and isolated from others at the start of the story, but develops first a begrudging respect for- then love for- Wei Wuxian.

For 16 years he refuses to accept that Wei Wuxian is dead since no body was recovered. Lan Wangji travels the world and throws himself headfirst at chaos both to protect the common people and in hopes that Wei Wuxian will appear.

In the present-arc, acts as a teacher and guide to the Junior Disciples of the Gusu-Lan.

Particularly skilled in a Lan musical technique called “Inquiry”, in which a guqin (zither) player mixes spiritual energy into a song and plays notes as a coded language to commune with the souls of the dead and ask them questions. Lan Wangji also develops a proficiency for an extremely rare and difficult form of guqin magic where he can literally attack people with the sound and power of the instrument.

Wei Wuxian’s own use of music to control others seems to have been heavily inspired by the Lan magics, though theirs are mainly in the vein of healing and suppressing darkness.

Jiang Wanyin // Jiang Cheng (Informal Name) // Yunmeng-Jiang Clan Leader // Sandu-Shengshou (Master of Three Poisons)

Most commonly referred to only by the informal name “Jiang Cheng”

Beloved brother- and eventually bitter enemy of- Wei Wuxian.

One of those fancy multi-purpose tools in human form (the Tooliest of Tools)

Thanks to his parents, has a massive inferiority complex that usually leads to violent outbursts against his adopted brother.

Like Lan Wangji, cannot accept that Wei Wuxian is dead as only charred bones were found where he fell. Spends 16 years hunting down any whisper of Wei Wuxian or demonic cultivation and executing any demonic cultivators he finds. 

Feels both extreme hatred and guilt towards Wei Wuxian.

Wears a purple snake bracelet-and-ring combo on one hand, the spiritual tool Zidian given to him by his mother. Zidian takes the form of a whip that strikes not only the flesh, but the soul of a person. It can instantly destroy any spirit possessing a body.

Wen Qionglin // Wen Ning (Informal Name) // The Ghost General

Almost exclusively referred to by the informal name Wen Ning.

Considered to be a weapon- or pet- of Wei Wuxian’s.

A young cultivator who Wei Wuxian resurrected from the dead and who acted as his subordinate during the rise of the Yiling Patriarch.

Fiercely loyal to Wei Wuxian in both life and death.

Black veins and eyes mark him as one of the ultra-rare Living Dead. Not a mindless zombie slave (Ghost-Puppet), but a fully conscious reanimated human capable of independent thought and action.

In battle, Wei Wuxian will use his flute Chenqing to focus resentment and hatred through Wen Ning and give him enhanced abilities, control his actions, or calm him.

Other Figures: Both Past and Present Arcs

Lan Xichen // Lan Huan (Informal Name) //  Zewu-Jun (The Grand Overgrowth Lord)

Clan Leader of the Gusu-Lan and elder brother of Lan Wangji.

Though he is Clan Leader, often deferrs to or is advised by his Uncle Lan Qiren (who HATES Wei Wuxian).

As he and his younger brother are seen as the pride and joy of the Lan Clan, they are referred to worldwide as “The Twin Jades of Lan”.

The most respected Clan Leader in the world for his kind and fair nature. Often acts as an arbitrator in disputes.

Uses a white jade flute to calm and settle angry or resentful energy around him. Wei Wuxian is his dark reflection.

Willing to give anyone a chance due to his pacifist nature. Does not feel hatred towards Wei Wuxian but rather tries to understand what drove him towards darkness and help guide him back.

Ships Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji relentlessly and often finds ways to push them together early on.

Nie Huaisang (No formal/informal name) // Nie Clan Heir // Nie Clan Leader

Half-brother of the Nie Clan Leader Nie Mingjue, later becomes Clan Leader in his place.

Despite being first heir to- then leader of- a Clan that prides itself on brute strength, Nie Huaisang is a kind and gentle soul who prefers the arts and artistic pursuits.

Religiously carries around a fan and never holds a sword.

Sweetheart, goober, and close friend of Wei Wuxian. Even in Wei Wuxian’s fall from grace, never bears him any ill will as Wei Wuxian never does anything to harm him. 

The only major (still living) character not at the Battle of Nightless where Wei Wuxian dies (though his brother Nie Mingjue was present).

Informally titled “The Head Shaker” as Clan Leader due to his indecisive nature. Whenever asked questions he frequently shakes his head and says “I don’t know”.

Considered a weak fool by many, but he is frequently advised (and coddled) by Lan Xichen and Jin Guangyao.

Jin Guangyao // Meng Yao (Informal Name) // Lianfang-Zun (Hidden-Fragrance Master)

Originally a servant of the Nie family, taken in by Nie Mingjue.

Bastard son of the Jin Clan Leader Guangshan and a prostitute, is consistently demeaned and debased for his parentage. The only ones who show him respect and kindness are Nie Mingjue, Nie Huaisang and Lan Xichen.

Half brother of Jin Zixuan and Mo Xuanyu (the madman who resurrects Wei Wuxian)

While a servant of the Nie Clan, Guangyao frequently acts as a buffer between ultra-masculine Nie Mingjue and his softer half-brother Nie Huaisang.

Nie Huaisang may be thought a dumbass by most, but he’s *Guangyao’s* dumbass, and thus Guangyao consistently shows care towards Nie Huaisang.

Other High-Profile Characters:: Both Past and Present Arcs (Noted by their names)

**Some will say I’ve left names off this list, but to avoid getting into EVERYTHING  everyone does, I’m limiting this to characters in 10+ episodes. This leaves some fandom favorites off the list but this is only meant to be a basic introductory guide. 

Sorry to fans of Xiao Xingchen, Song Lan, A-Qing, and Wen Yuan.

(Past Arc) Wen Qing (women do not have formal vs informal names or titles)

Wen Ning’s beloved elder sister.

Distant cousin to the evil Wen Ruohan and Wen Chao, and thus holds a prominent position within the Wen Clan. In the novels I believe she is said to be the 4th most powerful person in the entire Wen Clan (Behind Wen Ruohan and his two sons).

Considered to be the greatest physician ever produced by the Dafan-Wen, a clan of healers subjugated by the evil Wen Clan.

Her loyalties lie exclusively with her little brother Wen Ning, and she will do anything to keep him safe and protected. On her own though, she does tend towards the side of good and acts against her Clan when she is able to do so without putting Wen Ning at risk.

(Past Arc) Jiang Yanli (women do not have formal vs informal names or titles)

Beloved elder sister of both Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian.

Eldest daughter of Jiang Fengmian and Madam Yu.

Eventual wife of Jin Clan Heir Jin Zixuan and mother of Jin Clan Heir Jin Ling.

Engaged to Jin Zixuan since infancy, though he is initially dismissive of and even cold towards her.

The Peacekeeper of her family, Jiang Yanli protects Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng from her emotionally (and sometimes physically) abusive mother.

Acts as a mediator of disputes between her two younger brothers. Jiang Yanli is very much the glue that binds the family together.

(Past Arc) Jin Zixuan (No other name given) // Jin Clan Heir

Only *acknowledged* child of Jin Clan Leader Jin Guangshan, though he is the half-brother to a large number of bastard siblings.

These siblings include Nie servant Jin Guangyao/Meng Yao and Mo Xuanyu (the madman who resurrects Wei Wuxian)

Eventual husband of Jiang Yanli and father of Jin Clan Heir Jin Ling.

Originally a haughty and arrogant young lord, he is dismissive of his lifelong fiancee Jiang Yanli and frequently disparages her (leading to violent fights with her brothers).

Is very much disliked by both Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng (for his treatment of Yanli).

A semi-professional dumbass, maturity comes to him slower than most.

(Present Arc) Jin Rulan // Jin Ling (Informal name) // Jin Clan Heir

One of the so-called “Junior Squad”, a handful of Junior Disciples from different Clans who band together to fight the bad guys (Ancient Fantasy China Power Rangers).

The only child of Jiang Yanli and Jin Zixuan.

In episode 2 it is revealed that Jiang Yanli and Jin Zixuan died tragically just after his birth.

Largely raised by his uncle Jiang Cheng with some input from uncle Jin Guangyao. As uncle Jiang Cheng has the emotional stability of a spoon, Jin Ling tends to be rash, arrogant, and rude. He is kept isolated from other youths of his age and thus has no friends.

Accompanied everywhere by his dog Fairy, a spiritual beast (more powerful than a normal dog).

Also a nephew of Wei Wuxian, though Jin Ling was a newborn when Wei Wuxian died and thus has no relationship with him.

(Present Arc) Lan Sizhui // Lan Yuan (Informal name)

One of the so-called “Junior Squad”, a handful of Junior Disciples from different Clans who band together to fight the bad guys (Ancient Fantasy China Power Rangers).

As Lan Wangji’s chief student, Lan Sizhui is heavily favored by the normally cold and detached Wangji. He is therefore the de-facto leader of the Lan Junior Disciples.

Sizhui is warm, kind, and caring. He never speaks ill of others and even tries to be kind to Jin Ling while the other junior disciples (including Lan ones) generally scorn the other boy.

Regardless of if he is posing as Mo Xuanyu or after he is “outed” as Wei Wuxian, Lan Sizhui is always very respectful and kind towards Wei Wuxian. He considers him a wise senior and feels at ease when Wei Wuxian is nearby.

(Present Arc) Lan Jingyi (No other name given)

One of the so-called “Junior Squad”, a handful of Junior Disciples from different Clans who band together to fight the bad guys (Ancient Fantasy China Power Rangers).

If Lan Sizhui is the de-facto leader of the Lan Junior Disciples, Jingyi is Sizhui’s second. The two are best friends and are almost never seen out of one another’s company.

Snarky, sarcastic, and big-mouthed, Lan Jingyi is the “Wei Wuxian” of the Junior Squad. He has yet to meet a cultivator he isn’t willing to talk back to, be that “Mo Xuanyu” (Wei Wuxian) or even Jiang Clan Leader Jiang Cheng.

Lan Jingyi is also highly intelligent and is the first to question if “Mo Xuanyu” is truly insane or just someone pretending to be so. He makes other accusations throughout the story that at the time see unfounded but are later proven correct.

Mortal enemy of Jin Ling (if by ‘mortal enemy’ you mean bitchy and reluctant friend)

(Past Arc) Nie Mingjue (No other name given) // Nie Clan Leader // Chifeng-Zun (Scarlet-Blade Lord)

Clan Leader of the Nie Clan in the “Past Arc”.

Elder half-brother of Nie Huaisang.

Nie Mingjue is hard on his half-brother, as the Nie are renown for their warrior skills and Huaisang is more of a lover than a fighter.

Nie Mingjue is close friends with Lan Xichen, and often visits him for guidance. Lan Xichen is his closest friend and confidant throughout the story.

Nie Mingjue is a powerful and ruthless cultivator (against his enemies, he’s no sociopath) and often loses his temper. 

He is closely bonded with his broadsword Baxia, and she often moves on her own if he is particularly enraged.

(Past and Present Arcs) Xue Chengmei // Xue Yang (Informal name)

Most commonly referred to simply as “Xue Yang”- his formal name may not be in the show at all.

A low-level thug taken in by the evil Wen Clan and used as a sort of private hit-man.

Xue Yang is brutal, ruthless, and merciless against anyone he crosses paths with. Holds particular disdain for powerful and righteous clans, as he was maimed by a low-level Clan Leader.

Is missing his pinky finger because of an “accident” he suffered as a child and thus wears a glove on one hand.

Initially Xue Yang is introduced as a “guest disciple” of the Wen Clan, but later he branches out on his own.

(Past Arc) Luo Qingyang // Mian-Mian (nickname)

Though it is not customary for a woman to have courtesy vs informal names, Luo Qingyang is almost exclusively referred to by the nickname “Mian-Mian” throughout the series.

A guest disciple of the Jin Clan and direct subordinate of Jin Zixuan.

Mian-Mian originally is shown to be haughty and fiercely loyal to Jin Zixuan, though she often finds ways to assist Jiang Yanli get closer to him throughout his Dumbass Phase.

Mian-Mian is a tough and outspoken female cultivator, sometimes even standing at odds with her own clan.

(Past Arc) Wen Chao (No other name given)

The vicious, cruel second son of villain Wen Ruohan.

Distant cousin of Wen Qing and Wen Ning. He frequently takes Wen Ning as a sort of hostage to guarantee Wen Qing’s compliance with his demands.

Wen Chao is arrogant and haughty. He considers himself superior to all other disciples because of his clan. 

He is the main antagonist of Wei Wuxian in the “past” arc, and considers it part of his duty to destroy Wei Wuxian and the Jiang Clan for their refusal to bow to his family.

Frequently appears together with his mistress Wang Lingjiao (a wife is mentioned but never shown) tormenting or directly torturing younger cultivators.

[bewaretheidesofmarchyall]

Camping Trip Headcanons

Ever wondered what the sides would be like while camping?

One of the plot points on this was inspired by a post by @aidensm8

So. Camping trip (I’m just going to assume this is a human AU). Roceit and Logicality just kind of became a thing.

-For starters, they get extremely lost.

-They were planning on camping in an actual designated camping spot. However, it all went downhill when the map was lost.

-There had been bickering throughout the entire car ride as to who got to hold the map. Eventually, a rotating schedule was decided on.

-By the time they’d been walking in the wrong direction for three hours, everyone had a different opinion on who actually lost the map.

-Roman blamed Janus, Janus blamed Virgil, Virgil blamed Logan, Logan blamed Remus, and Remus blamed Patton (who had never once touched the map. Remus knew this, and was only accusing him for the sake of chaos).

-After being lost in the woods for a while, they decide to pitch the tent. There were quite a few attempts, but in the end the monstrosity they assembled looked vaguely like a tent.

-A few things about the cast of characters

-Roman: Still the dramatic dude we know and love. Everyone’s around sixteen or so in this AU, and he’s got all of the Getting Out Of This Small Town dreams. One day, he’ll be famous, just try to stop him.

Currently having a bit of a rivals-to-lovers thing with Janus.

-Janus: This dorky snek. Wants similar things to Roman, but with a vein of cynicism that is leading him far from theater and towards law.

He and Roman have been competing for parts in various school plays since freshmen year. 

-Logan: Logan knows so very much about space and so very little about dealing with pining after a friend. But he’s planned this camping trip to perfection and he’s going to have a “totally unplanned” chat with Patton under the stars.

-Patton: Patton is oblivious as to why Logan is so excited about camping and the planning process, since he normally hates the outdoors.

Anyway, he’s really excited to go on a trip with all of his friends and eat marshmallows! 

One thing to note about Patton is that he has a small mark on his forearm the approximate size of a bug bite. This will be important later.

-Remus: Remus has a plan to make this camping trip...memorable. By which he means ✨Disturbing for all parties✨! Yes, he’s got a prank planned, which is why his backpack contains a live screech owl.

-Virgil: Virgil has a reputation at being the best at telling horror stories. Some kids can whistle with a blade of grass, some kids can curl their tongues, but Virgil’s talent is scaring people out of their minds. And he’s proud of it!

-Okay, back to your regularly scheduled programming

-Even though they’re lost, everything’s fine! They were able to build a fire (Remus brought a blowtorch), and when sunset came everyone was set up.

-Patton has found a variety of cool rocks, which he shows off to everyone.

-Logan looks up exactly what kind of rocks they are in his guide.

He brought a guide for this.

-Roman has been singing a veritable jukebox of musical numbers while setting everything up.

-Janus is trying to outsing him. 

-Virgil is trying get either Remus or Logan to bet with him as to when exactly they’ll become a couple.

-Remus tends to his screech owl.

-Soon, it’s dark, and marshmallows are consumed. Remus declines to stick his over the fire, instead lighting it with the blowtorch and placing the entire thing into his mouth, stick and all. 

-Then, it’s that much awaited time. Horror story time.

-Janus tells the first story. Very gothic horror Edgar Allen Poe stuff, better in terms of world building than actual scare factor.

-Roman goes next. His story isn’t that impressive (witchcraft and such), but his acting more than makes up for it.

-Remus tells a tale of the zombie apocalypse. There is cannibalism. However, he seems a little distracted, almost like he’s worried that a live animal in his bag will make a noise at the wrong time.

-Logan goes next. He’s not the best at horror stories, given his tendency to a) take things too literally and b) give all of his characters basic common sense.

So he tells some non-fiction instead.

He lists unsolved cases, tales of UFO’s, mysterious disappearances with no explanation. He declines to mention the likely scientific reasons for these events.

It works.

-And then, it’s Virgil’s turn. 

Damn.

He’s very good at it.

He somehow managed to make “tHeRe’S a MuRdErEr iN tHeSe WoOdS” actually nerve-wracking again.

Janus and Roman end up holding onto each other in fear by the end of the story. There’s indeed awkward springing apart and throat clearing, thank you for asking.

-They’re all ready to go back to the tent when Patton reminds them he hasn’t told a story yet.

-They sit down, somewhat relieved that they’ll have a less scary tale to finish the night off. After all, it’s Patton.

-Pat takes the flashlight, fiddles with the switch, and smiles innocently. He then proceeds to tell his friends exactly why he’s scared of spiders.

-When the flashlight dies at the end, there are screams, and not just from Roman. Everyone is terrified. Patton’s just eating the extra marshmallows like nothing is wrong as his friends have an existential crisis.

-Later that night...

-Virgil is questioning everything now that he is no longer the best at telling horror stories. So, when he sees Remus sneak off, he doesn’t stop him.

-Instead, he offers to join him in whatever spooky mischief he’s conducting. 

-Remus reveals Señor Scoodly-Scream, the screech owl. He plans to release the live bird into the tent at 3am in the morning and just kind of see what happens.

-Virgil agrees that this plan is a good one, but thinks that there a few things they can do to improve it.

-One of the factors of a good scare, he explains in an almost scientific voice, is that the participants are already on edge. If a live owl is released, sure, they’ll be shocked. But if they already have a feeling something is going on, and the imagination is allowed to linger, and THEN something is released?

Pandemonium.

-See! He still knows how to spook people!

-He suggests that they get long, spindly sticks that looks like brittle fingers to scrape against the walls of the tent. And the two of them head off together into the woods, hushing each other’s laughter and Señor Scoodly-Scream’s squawking. 

-As subtle as they tried to be, Logan had been keeping an ear open for when Remus would try to do something. So, after a few minutes, he follows them. 

-On his way out the door, Patton wakes up and joins him. The two of them try to follow Remus and Virgil.

-They go in the exact opposite direction as the devious pranksters, leaving Janus and Roman alone.

-Logan is jumpy for many reasons. He’s alone with his crush, it’s the middle of the night, he’s alone with his crush, many spooky stories were told, he’s alone with his crush-Our guy has a lot going on. Is it any wonder that he isn’t paying much attention to where exactly he and Patton are going?

-Roman is the fifth to wake up, only to realize that everyone except for Janus is just GONE.

-THEY’VE CLEARLY ALL BEEN MURDERED BY SPIDERS, OR THE MURDERER IN THE WOODS, OR ABDUCTED BY ALIENS

-Janus is the last person to wake up. It hard to not wake up when someone is screaming two feet from your ear.

-But upon finding that everyone else is gone, he’s almost tempted to join in the shrieks. One person leaving is one thing, but four people?? No, they’re clearly going to die in the middle of the woods.

-The two of them freak out. Roman suggests going to search for the others, and Janus point out that every horror movie suggests not! Doing! That!

-But Roman is adamant, and Janus isn’t going to be alone right now, so the pair of them sneak into the woods.

-Meanwhile, Remus and Virgil return with sticks. They scrape the walls of the tent. No reaction. They scrape louder. No reaction. They rattle the tent itself. Nope.

-They even release Scoodly-Scream into the tent! NOTHING.

-When they check, they realize that no one’s there (except the owl). PANIC ENSUES.

-Remus and Virgil come to the conclusions that everyone in the tent was eaten by spiders and they were lucky that they got out when they could. Remus decides that they should try to run back to town and out of the woods ASAP. 

-Which is what they try to do! However, they forgot one crucial detail: They’d been lost at the beginning of this camping trip.

-So, everyone’s kind of going in circles. Logan and Patton are having a stroll in the night air while everyone else runs like electrified hamsters.

-Roman and Janus have been holding onto each other for a solid fifteen minutes before even noticing. They both pretend that they didn’t notice, reasoning that it’s due to the cold, or the alien abductions.

-Suddenly, they hear a stick break. They freeze, seeing an outline of something of around human size in the distance. It moves again, and Roman and Janus rush at it, yelling and tackling the figure to the ground.

-It’s Remus. They don’t have time to apologize before Virgil comes out of nowhere and tries to fight them off with a stick.

-Once faces are spotted and no-one’s attacking anyone anymore, the four of them decide to head back to the tent.

-Then, they remember Logan and Patton.

-Logan and Patton are lost. You think everyone else in this fic is lost? These two are so lost you wouldn’t believe it.

-Eventually, their flashlight dies. The two of them are lost in the woods, in the middle of the night, with no flashlight.

-But without the flashlight, it’s easier to see the stars.

-Logan and Patton stop to rest under a tree. Logan points out the constellations. Patton points out that he has feelings for Logan. Logan.exe short circuits.

-The sweet moment is broken when they hear screaming. The two exchange a quick glance and run in the screaming’s direction.

-Meanwhile, Janus covers his ears as Virgil and Remus have a spontaneous screaming contest. The mood is light-hearted until they discover a dead flashlight on the ground under a tree.

-This freaks out the Everyone, and they scatter in fear accordingly.

-Roman trips over a rock and rolls down a hill as the others escape. The bulb of his flashlight breaks, and he is alone in the dark. He hates it, and panics, and is convinced that whatever evil force is in this woods is going to kill him.

-Janus notices that Roman isn’t with the group any more. All of his instincts tell him to run and save himself, and that’s what he does! For five seconds.

-Then, he runs back toward Roman (and potentially axe-murder). The two of them find each other at the bottom of the hill, and a thought enters both of their minds.

Oh.

OH.

Oh no.

-It’s pitch black now. Every flashlight has been taken out of commission. 

-All three groups run smack into each other at the top of the hill. After some more shrieking and stick-fighting, it’s established who everyone is. A collective sigh of relief is breathed that no one is dead.

-Slowly, carefully, they make their way back to the tent. It takes a while, but for once someone pays attention to where they’re going, and they get there eventually. 

-Everyone’s tired, and ready to catch what little sleep they can during this hell-night. Logan unzips the tent.

-And Señor Scoodly-Scream flies into his face.

So, there it is! Camping! Romance! An owl full of rage!

I hope you enjoyed this mini-fic :)