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anyone who acts like there's some kind of implicit understanding or sisterhood between all women is straight up lying

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"i fucked your wife"/"i'm having sex with your wife"/"i'm cucking you": comedy

"i'm helping your wife with household chores"/"i'm taking your wife out to a nice dinner and show after she's had a long day at work"/"i'm bonding with your children over family gatherings": peak comedy

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your man doesn’t have the mental strength to caramelize onions 

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No google docs, I don't actually think that's what I was trying to say.

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Another storytelling rule I think people should remember is the law of diminishing returns. If you keep on ramping up the stakes higher and higher and higher, after a point it gets to where the audience can’t really care anymore.

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Idk exactly how to explain this but the softness of real wool and real linen is very different from the artificial softness of polyester “sherpa”, fuzzy faux-fur, spongey acrylic knits and people have gotten too used to the soft plastics and now associate wool with “itchy” and linen with rough and cotton with “too heavy” and then go and wear 100% polyester fleecy sweatshirts and say it’s so warm and cozy but actually they’re just staticky cooking in their sweat locked inside a plastic membrane and you are paying too much to be wearing filaments of petroleum products and the money isn’t going to the people sewing them either. I’m saying you all need to touch grass and the grass in this situation is good quality textiles made of natural fibres.

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What would you guys consider the worst movie you've ever seen? Not something that's fun to make fun of, nothing you ironically enjoyed, I mean just an absolutely miserable moviegoing experience that you paid for, hated every second, and wish you had walked out of and asked for a refund.

For me, no joke, Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted. It did not even feel like a real movie to me. It made me see red! I was SEETHING with anger and annoyance throughout the entire thing, and I cannot for the life of me articulate why. I saw it once in 2012 when I was 15, I remember almost nothing about it now, but it struck a nerve with me like no other movie ever has before or since.

Tell me in the tags, which movie makes you disproportionately angry just thinking about it?

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Reposting this from a friend bc I think it is VERY important to know of this, and for immigrants, and other possible victims of the ICE Raids happening right now

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me as a 14th century knight: this sucks i'm gonna fms (translator's note: fall on my sword)

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People don't actually grow out of their emo phases. People are forced out of their emo phases by employers who get a raging boner over controlling how their employees dress, cut their hair, whether they mod their bodies and so on

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me

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screaming THAT'S A SAW FISH every time i look up saw sharks bc the images are all jumbled up together

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we became adults. and we forgot about that one lizard that can run on top of the water. and the bombardier beetle. we don't even think about mako sharks being the fastest shark anymore.

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