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#was i scared? idk but i sure was feeling something
joosthead · 2 days
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can i do more than one? 👀
13 & 29 & 30
₊˚⊹⋆ prompt: 13. who reaches for the other’s hand first? || 29. one headcanon about this otp that breaks your heart || 30. one headcanon about this otp that mends it
₊˚⊹⋆ reader: gn!reader, 29&30 revolve around normal au
₊˚⊹⋆ cws: none
₊˚⊹⋆ junote: thank you sm for requesting!! 29&30 seem to be very popular hc requests lolol 😆😆
RPF/REAL PERSON FICTION BELOW CUT, DNI IF ANTI-RPF
13 who reaches for the others hand first?
you do :3 i mean obviously it depends but it’s mostly you.
in the beginning it was mostly him—he’s a level 100 clinger grabbing your hand out of the blue and kissing your knuckles but i think he likes when you chase too. he’s the most expressive guy… ever lol jk so seeing you be that level is so 😆😆
he likes when he walks ahead of you a little when you’re out on the town; you get distracted by a storefront or something or other and his long legs carry him ahead of you so you have to catch up.
from behind, you grab his hand and he looks back and smiles at you, pulling you in closer so you’re side by side, his earphone wires tangling and up in your business, your hands together behind your back as he kisses your temple.
“ohhhhh, my baby, you missed me soooo much, hm?” all sickly sweet and a tiny bit patronizing, fully joking but also meaning it a little because the annoyed look on your face makes it for him.
“suuuurree,” you say, sarcasm dripping off your words, but when you untangle your arms, kissing his tattooed knuckles as you talk about what distracted you—joost knows you mean it.
29 headcanon that breaks your heart
(normal au)
it takes a really long time for you two to get together. really really long time. the vast majority of the time spent was full of doubt and insecurities. he questioned—is this really what you want? you questioned yourself—is this really what he wants?
the utter mismatch of your lives were not lost on you. it took a few years to get your shit together and finally admit it to yourselves that regardless of your doubts, you wanted each other.
your schedules were chaotic as it is and you didn’t want to let each other down; neither of you would back down, always butting heads about making sure the other wouldn’t have to compromise their life just to be with the other.
even after you got together, there was still a lot of guilt on your end about how long it took; he was always the one who wanted to push the boundary, finally make it so he was yours, but you objected out of fear.
tbh it was the opposite of commitment issues—you two were so committed to each other and didn’t want to let go, it was just the whole label part.
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this is meta about normal au, jtsfaoi, and tt, but this is why there’s so much guilt on reader’s end about not showing up for him!! they feel like they wasted 2 years (oops is that a spoiler) out of the sake of being scared and for a long time feel like they need to make up for that for him :’’’) there will be lots of this talk in the future prequel parts of normal au so more heartbreak lols
30 headcanon that mends it
in my head normal au reader and joosti tosti get married and have 3 babies LOLZ soooo… i wanna share more but idk how much i can spoil ab my plans for the future ?!? i can prob write a little bullet point post about it if anyone wants it 👀
the wedding is soooo small and spontaneous—like you woke up that morning not even planning to do anything that day, next thing you know you’re at town hall at noon with as many of your friends that can make it to witness for you. you have a second bigger ceremony so you can have all the pictures and little wedding customs, but that first wedding still ended up being your favorite. can also write drabble about this lolol but can’t promise i’ll share much 🤫🤫
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xoxochb · 13 hours
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percy jackson with a hades daughter please😩
(love your writing btw🩷🩷)
— you must like me for me
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warnings: none pairing: percy jackson x daughter of hades a/n: my cabin my cabin my cabin!!!
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୨୧ sunshine x grumpy trope my beloved
୨୧ first thing I want to talk about is the short ass tempers of hades kids. I can speak from experience I’ve got the shortest temper ever
୨୧ hades kids can kill upon their will and you would use this to your full advantage if the idiotic percy jackson didn’t prevent you from doing so
୨୧ like I mean some kid could’ve pissed you off over something stupid I’m not even sure— let’s say they took your reading spot even if it’s not really yours but it is because you silently claimed it
୨୧ and you’re angry as FUCK. like I’m talking rising the dead- darkened eyes- fists balled up kind of angry
୨୧ and what kind of boyfriend is percy if he allows you to kill a kid over something stupid? you think, personally, he would be the best. percy on the other hand thinks it’s not morally acceptable
୨୧ he’s also trying to save your rep because in camp hades kids are typically frowned upon because your father being the god of the dead and all they think you’re all weird and emo
୨୧ and percy hates seeing you bullied by the other campers over this so he calms you down before anything happens, successfully keeping the live of the camper who stole your spot
୨୧ anyways let’s talk about when you first met
୨୧ percy was ecstatic about meeting another child of the big three— but you’re absolute resting bitch face scared the shit out of him
୨୧ but when he finally talked to you he realized your personalities wasn’t half as bad as your appearance (not that he thought your appearance was bad— you were gorgeous but horrifying)
୨୧ anyways I wanna do dating hcs now
୨୧ sarcastic 🤝🏼 even more sarcastic
୨୧ IMAGINE LMAO
୨୧ with both you and percy and you’re insane sarcasm you’d be unstoppable, truly. like just talking shit about people all the time I can’t 😭
“oh my gods she’s just the nicest person I’ve ever met!”
“right? so happy and bubbly!”
୨୧ en e ways…
୨୧ I’m not sure if this is just my opinion and it’s probably not cannon but hades kids (along with the apollo kids) have the best relationship with their godly parent so your visits to the underworld are frequent
୨୧ you ended up bringing percy once without realizing the issue your dad had with him
୨୧ long story short he’s not allowed to visit with you anymore
୨୧ and when you take your trips down under percy begs you not to go claiming your dad is such ‘an awful god!’ and he ‘would miss you and cry himself to sleep’ if you left
୨୧ dramatic much?
୨୧ anyways I don’t wanna yap too much but I have more more thing I want to say really quickly is double dates with nico and will because how cute would that be 😣😣
୨୧ I feel like overtime you would make them like every wednesday or something like a weekly thing idk just for funsies
୨୧ but I’ll wrap this up now 10/10 relationship would definitely recommend <33
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dravidious · 1 day
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I think you're quite cool y'know
I have this maybe-not-exactly-fear of really big stuff. Like, the thought of a colossal Thing looming over me is like. idk. makes me uneasy? I don't know the feeling exactly but whatever it inspired a magic card. I sure hope tumblr doesn't make the image way bigger than it needs to be!
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#asks#custom cards#custom magic card#8 mana gets you a 16/16 trample with a bit of protection#basically average for a modern rare lol#thought about giving it protection from mv 2 or less but i wanted the image of a little 1/1 soldier pathetically trying to block it#a giant unbeatable force that you're not allowed to fight is boring#a giant unbeatable force that you can TRY to fight is awesome#it doesn't NEED protection from your weak creatures#it does however die to a 1/1 deathtouch#in the end nothing is truly unbeatable#oh yeah my Fear of Big Things is a thing i first noticed when playing Xenoblade Chronicles X#there's some REALLY big creatures in that game and even though it's just a game and dying doesn't even have a penalty i was still scared#i didn't want to go near them#but the reason i'm not entirely sure if it's a fear is because i DID go near them#one of them was marked as passive and also there was a treasure chest near it so i had to go grab it#the other was a gigantic robot sleeping in a lake that was almost certainly aggressive. i didn't wanna go near it. i knew it'd wake up#but i did. it woke up and killed me#but like i did it so it can't be that major of a fear. maybe it's like. an uneasy fascination#idk tho because i don't get exposed to Gigantic Things very often#ALSO another example: i had a dream when i was little that i still remember where i shrunk and my stuffed dog was MASSIVE#i was the size of its glass bead eyeball. staring up at it from where i stood on the colossal mattress#was i scared? idk but i sure was feeling something#so anyway. really stupidly large creature. enjoy#thought about doing hexproof from mv 3 or less but honestly it's already really really strong and i'm not wotc
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mipexch · 1 month
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been thinking about something wicked a little too much lately. no harm in romanticizing the ominous dreadful unstoppable force
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ngl the "im white so i dont talk abt any characters' race ever bc im afraid of accidentally saying something racist" approach to fandom is like. very weak. imo.
like first of all: i get that "i dont incorporate race into my media analysis because i'm afraid of messing up" comes from a different place than "i don't incorporate race into my media analysis because I Don't See Race 😊 there is only The Human Race." but it has the same functional effect, right? that effect being that your analysis of [INSERT MEDIA HERE] ignores the very real way that race impacts people.
second of all: it feels kinda lazy! like ur saying "i dont know enough abt race to feel comfortable commenting on how race affects this show and i dont care enough to learn." the only way to become more comfortable discussing race is to actually practice discussing race. but when i see people saying this it feels like they're saying "i'm white, which means i don't know how to talk about race, and i don't have to know how to talk about race, and i don't ever have to know how to talk about race, so i'm choosing to never learn how to talk about race."
third of all: just because you don't openly talk about race doesn't mean you're any less likely to accidentally say or do something racist. implicit biases run deep, y'all. it's probably already there in your interpretation of the show. but the "i don't want to accidentally say something racist" implies that you are positive that your interpretation of the show isn't racist. and i'm not saying you're wrong. but i'm saying that if a person of color tells you that something you said about [INSERT MEDIA HERE] was racist, you better be prepared to actually listen and not just brush them off because "i can't be racist! i purposefully never talk about race just to make sure i'm not racist!"
which brings me to my final point: if you do accidentally say something racist... literally just apologize. if someone says you've been doing something racist, apologize and stop doing that thing. it's literally not that hard. i've done it. i've seen other people do it. "i'm scared of being called racist!" is such a weak excuse im tired of it. getting called racist is not the end of the fucking world. calm the fuck down and grow a spine. jesus.
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glitteringdepths · 5 months
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had some brainworms about transfem furina.... can anyone hear me.
i feel like this would have really interesting implications in her story, much as she loves acting, but struggles with it due to the 500 years she spent being forced to act, would being a woman be the same for her? she doesn't know where the act ends and where her actual identity begins. is she a woman because she wants to be, or just because she had to be one. even if she enjoys it more than the alternative, does she actually enjoy it? or is it just because she was one for so long that she enjoys it?
i can imagine that focalors likely didnt care much about her identity/presentation as archons have been shown to be able to change their forms at will basically, but furina is the human counterpart of focalors. she doesn't have that ability to change herself just like that. i imagine gender identity would be much more important to a human, especially one that must keep up an act at all times, than a god, and thus something that would affect her. something she would think about. a lot.
maybe post-prophecy, she would experiment. figure out if femininity is in fact something she wants. maybe she would try to go back to being "cis" and then realize it wasn't right for her. and i imagine that she would flourish more being able to properly express her femininity rather than doing it just because it was apart of the role.
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chiimeramanticore · 8 days
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#im not dead quit asking#I'm just really really really not doing well#sorry if i scared anyone. that wasnt my intent#things got. let's say worse. for me irl. more complicated for sure#i hate to publicize my breakdown I really do. but maybe i... need this? in a weird way?#i haven't really been adjusting well to having a platform online. that's not anyone's fault but mine ofc#i feel that my 'fans' (if ive earned the right to call them that) dont and frankly cant ever care for me as a person#i dont know you and you dont know me. you dont know all of me at least. just what i make public. what i allow others to see#i had it kinda bullied into me that i need to keep my mouth shut abt my own issues. and ive spent a lot of this year trying to unlearn that#maybe publicizing this is a bad idea anyway#I just know ive been more honest abt my emotions and my personal life with my friends and my partner#and not everyone enjoys it but i know I'm not like. traumadumping so i feel somewhat assured that anyone who doesnt wanna hear abt my life-#-probably wasnt all that interested in forming a close relationship w me to begin with. even if theyre friendly at first#everyone else; the people who I know care about me; have shown me that through their actions#my point is being honest abt how youre doing w other ppl is a good idea. revolutionary i know lol#and i still don't know a lot of you personally but#parasocial or not i got some very genuine sounding messages while I was gone. and i. feel really bad that i worried those people#I guess theres my proof that people would care if i disappeared suddenly. people would notice pretty quick it seems#im never gonna kms btw. even if i didnt have the support i have im simply too stubborn to die lol. to put it lightly#and to those who thought this was abt fandom drama: it's not. those who shall not be named are genuinely the least of my problems these days#I'm on a journey of self actualization. or something. im trying to get my shit together. im trying to stop being clinically depressed lol#but god keeps throwing wrenches in my plans and. i beat myself up about it too much#but that's just life. they say you make a plan and god laughs#im. trying to be okay with just riding the wave. im impatient but if i keep trying to somehow speed up time im just gonna exhaust myself#which I think is where im at now. burnt out#and on top of all that i still feel this need to like. perform for you guys#if i dont keep making content everyone will forget i exist. if i dont make another video essay this year can i even call myself a youtuber#etc etc. its the spiral its impostor syndrome we've all been there#im trying to end this on a positive note but idk. i dont have all the answers yet#hoping i figure it out soon. i hope you dont forget me in the meantime
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kananri · 1 month
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luck-of-the-drawings · 4 months
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when i was in highschool one o my biggest coping mechanisms was drawing all the kids i hated getting killed and eaten and killed. and well. time is a slowly ascending spiral. you will find patterns.(i work as a blackjack dealer. gamblers are FASCINATING
#cw blood#luckys original content#ITS SMALL BUT ITS ART SO IT GOES ON THE ART BLOG#also wwaooooww its meee its my lil persona!!! i dont draw myself enough....#anyway i have bigger things in the works. im slowly but surely chipping away at a pd thumbnail for that pd thumbnail project#FINALLY COLORING. BUT COLORING IS SO HARD AND I HAVNT BEEN IN THE COLORING MOOD#SO IVE JUST BEEN MAKING RLY DUMB COMICS INSTEAD... OOPS..#idk if anything finished n polished will be posted here anytime soon. BUT i post wips of everything on my twitter#and i post jrwi exclusive wips on my slucky blog. you may look at those if u have Truck Art Wishdrawls. as many do. as many do#THIS BLACKJACK JOB IS RLY AWESOME BTW DONT GET ME WRONG#i work three 12-hour days ina row. i gotta take an hourlong bus up to the depths o the mountains and then#i get to stay in this delightful lil hotel that was built in an ooold hospital. its a whole casino town. and an OLD one at that#ITS GORGEOUS HERE. last week my bus home was delayed for 2 hours#so i finally got the chance to head to other casinos and try drinkin n gambling. lost ten bucks to a pretty girl. NOT the first time#i rlly wanna try it again!!! i love interracting w ppl and i love being inebriated in public bc im just so sweet and pleasant and friendly#and pretty girls LLOOOOVEE MEEEEE i think i just need to go to gay bars more#but theres fucking NONE HERE. HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im collectin comrade queers up here tho#we wanna make a Group but we just gotta come up witha name first. i need something weird and strange#yknow i remember being in highschool. and being miserable n unmedicated. my mommas ultimatum was that;#if i dont drop out of highschool; i dont need to move out. she probably wouldntve kicked me out anyway bc my mommas sweet like that but#she REALLY wanted me to graduate. and i remember dreading that i might never do that#i remember feeling like the Resident Idiot. sweet but so so fucking dumb. it took me 7 years of strife n stress before i finally graduated#i remember worrying back then that i might not ever be able to handle myself out there. that i'd be too dependant on others#AND HERE I AM. DID U KNOW I WAS LOOKIN AT HOUSES A WHILE AGO? IM AN ADULT AND IM WWINNINNNGGGGGGG#IM RUNNING OUTA ROOM BUT HERES MY ADVICE TO YOU. BC I KNOW UR FUCKING SCARED TOO. THE ONE THING THAT SAVED ME.#THAT KEPT ME FROM SINKING INTO DESPAIR IS REMEMBERING ONE THING: ITS LITERALLY JUST LIKE VIDEO GAMES#MOST PPL YOU CAN JUST WALK UP TO N ASK A QUESTION N THEYLL ANSWER. THEYRE ALL NPCS THEYRE NOT REAL#LIKE IF U WALK INTO A BANK AND ASK HOW A DEBIT CARD WORKS THEY WILL HELP YOU#AND IF YOU THINK THEY HAVE ULTERIOR MOTIVES RELATING TO MONEY. YOU CAN ASK THE CUSTOMERS TOO. ITS JUST LIKE VIDEO GAMES#ANYWAY STAY SAFE KIDS HAVE FUNNNNN. IM GOING TO GO DO DRUGS NOW. HOPE U CAN DO DRUGS SOON TOO. I LOVE YOU
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codecicle · 3 months
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Congratulations on figuring out there are multiple people in your brain btw. I saw a while ago you posting about it being unsure so, YAY YOU FIGURED IT OUT!! LETSGOOOO!!! HELLO CHARLIE AND OTHER CODECICLE ALTERS!!!! YAAAYYYY!!!!!
FIGURED IT OUT!!! It really is crazy I didn't figure it out sooner, but I just assumed I was weird and didn't talk to anybody about it. Made a joke about it after multiple years of hiding it from everyone (and myself) and got told by multiple people "Hey yeah you're not normal go research stop feeling scared" and I did and now I'm friends with the people in my brain 🔥🔥 huge wins all around! LETSGOOO WOOOOOOOO CHEERING YAAAY!! Everyone rattling around up here says hi back!!!
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I do think the hardest part about actually writing a whole novel for the first time is having to constantly remind myself that first drafts are allowed to suck. They are not meant to be perfect. They're allowed to be filled with half thoughts where you need to go back later because you can't figure out what you need to fix until there are words on a page. Like, allowing myself to feel like I am bad at something and still continuing to push might be the biggest way I've grown in my entire life.
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evansbby · 5 months
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I cannot believe the wicked games Drabble was 5000 words long like basically a full ass fic and the low amount of notes it got…
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tanicus-caesareth · 5 months
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guarana drama, damage control
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wereh0gz · 10 months
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Is my discomfort with my boobs gender dysphoria, body dysmorphia, or just a general discomfort with the sensations of having a human body that comes with possible neurodivergency
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story-book-sillies · 18 days
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Having complicated emotions about my possible neurodivergency again
I just wish I could at least get tested to see if I have ADHD because I just want to know if my years of research and analyzing my brain means anything. Because I don’t want to self diagnose. But I just know something is up with my brain and I don’t know what it is
If I don’t get a diagnosis, then I’ll never know and I’ll never get the resources I need or the community of other neurodivergent individuals (in the case that I do have ADHD or something else) but if I do get a diagnosis and end up being neurodivergent, I’ll be shamed by my family and end up alone in that way. So I don’t win in either situations
And I know I can use resources if they help make my life easier, but I feel like such a fraud like, “Oh look at this loser, she’s using resources for people with ADHD and Autism even though she’s undiagnosed, I bet she’s just faking it.”
I don’t want to be unfair to those who do actually need help but I also feel like I need help with nobody to help me and I’m lost and scared and frustrated and confused and hghhghhjgfhhnn
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immortalsins · 2 months
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and not to vent once again by my cat is losing the use of his back legs very fast and i don't know what to do to help him
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