#very sorry to everyone who saw that
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Y’all ever had a panic attack so bad that you pass out in front of the manager at your new day job and also a full line of customers?
Yeah so I have a Tweek oneshot idea now
#personal?#but also#south park#for reference I started picking up random shifts at a smoothie place and get really fucking overstimulated during a rush#and I’ve been up for far too long#fully Tweaking on caffeine#and this poor sweet 19 year old kid had to HELP ME TO THE BACK#I am so fucking embarrassed#but Tweek oneshot idea tho#fic ideas#very sorry to everyone who saw that#unfortunately I lived#Stan will be in the role of the manager#and Tweek as me#i hate it here
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I love a man who needs to be put in a mental ward but looks angelic being insane
#ff7#final fantasy 7#ffvii#final fantasy vii#sephiroth#was trying really hard to avoid side profile but oh! i can't#and sorry to everyone who saw me draw him clothless twice in a row#not very demure of me!#so embarrassing actually goodness
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I wanted to design my own female Alastor for funsies and put her in clothes she might have worn in the mid 1930s. Once I’d drawn one outfit it was hard to stop. Of course I had to turn them into a catalog page!
#hazbin hotel#hazbin alastor#Alastor#fem!alastor#hazbin hotel fanart#hazbin hotel alastor#fem Alastor#female alastor#genderswap#1930s fashion#this is very self indulgent#I just wanted to draw female Alastor in outfits I saw in my mid 1930s sears fashion catalog#and I thought it would be cute to display the designs like they’re from a fashion catalog#combining my current hyperfixation with my love of vintage clothes#heads up girlies a new hyperfixation just dropped!#sorry to everyone who followed me for Trolls things#this show is VERY tonally different#I enjoyed making this so much so if you want more let me know#most outfits and poses are from the book#I just wanna play dress up with my favourite characters
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you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah
#sorry i got really into my feelings about mark hoffman again#the very specific version of him in my brain that i really really wish i had the time and energy to properly share with you guys#saw#well until i muster the energy to explode all of my feelings out into a fic. if you want to TRY and understand#know that my three biggest hoffman fic insps right now are as follows#your best kept secret hoffman. a series of mistakes hoffman. and rushed like a dreadful wind hoffman.#there is a very clear throughline just know i am extremely emotionally compromised rn#thinking about theee fics vs the canon path hoffman spirals down#something something the absolute tragedy of watching a man's descent into madness#the transformation of a man into a monster#and what could have saved him from himself and kramer's corruption#sorry i'm rambling so much oh my god i was just having such a crying fit out of nowhere about this#do you think he could feel it happening. do you think he was aware he was losing his mind.#the script version of him fucks with me so bad. the crazed rankings and the longer hair and him not being well kept anymore#it's impossible to think he didn't know he was deteriorating#fuuuck okay i need to either chill or write a whole longfic rn#i project on that guy so much i truly don't know if i could properly write my vision of him#until i do something more substantial the full extent of my hoffman exists for me and my boyfriend only. they get me like no one else#well ginny and jenna also get me. please read best kept secret and a series of mistakes Oh My God#where am i going with this. i like tag rambling actually this is a nice way to do it without forcing EVERYONE to read my delirium#anyways if you've read all of this i think i love you? feel free to dm me about hoffman and my very specific headcanons and aus#maybe soon i'll try and start writing my fics about this tragic man#i could never say any of this on twitter btw they'd string me up for my opinions on him as a sad wet beast who could have been fixed#if only he hadn't been weaponized first#god i'm too tired to even be as embarrassed about this as i should be. thought i unlearned cringe already#but i've been spending way too much time on twitter and they HAAATE hoffman there#rip. i know it's not that serious but i'm sensitive rn and hate feeling lonely in my thoughts#ok bye for real otherwise i'll never shut up. i might tag ramble more often bc this was therapeutic in a way i needed badly#cat chat
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something something sewing event
#honami making leoneeds outifts / repairing shihos jacket and tsukasa sewing little clothes for bunny. win#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#proseka#honami mochizuki#tsukasa tenma#wxs#leoneed#I hate twt i love having everyone who slightly annoys me blocked or muted. sorry#NOBODY FUCKING KNOWS HONAMI LIKES TO SEW ITS MAKE ME MADE STFU ABOUT TSUKASA. MY FRIEND HONAMI.#holdee of both opinions that its a shame mixed events have been weak writing wise and also havent been used to their fill potential recentl#to have characters who dont normally interacted get to meet each ofher. And tsukasas writing in particular is hurting bad rn#But also pjsk fandom does have misogyny issues (Because every fandom does bc all forms of bigotry oremeate everything even shnconsciously)#Because its incredible that everyone ran to bat for tsukasa being in the event but i saw mobidy mention honami who also likes to sew ..#she even says in a card story that she wanted to remake All of leoneeds sekai outfits in real life since theyre stuck in sekai#Idk ive been oeeved about this so i must rjn to my oersonal disry (tumblr tags)#also I need honami and mafuyu interaction proper like what the fuck is going on. there could be the chance for very interesting growth if#clpl would give them the chance ..#tldr It is really annoying when clpl constantly forgets shit about their own characters 😭😭😭😭#/ seems too scared to let mixed events be Actually kmportant to the story / characters rceently. Which is crazy#esp for wxs whose entire thing is about how other people have shaped them and how theh wantnto touchnpeoples lives 😭😭😭😭😭aWhatever YAP OVER#But i love shizuku so im not complaining about anything other than who keeps inviting len
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Till's expressing himself through clothing – a rant
today's sad alnst thought of the day is that no matter how you view round 6, I think it's undeniable that ivan was able to give back to till a piece of himself that he lost after witnessing round 5
and i'm talking about this
I think Till outfits are important when it comes to discerning his mental state/attitude, both because of plot-related reasons (imo Till has a degree of power over deciding or at least selecting his clothes) and also character design (in a media like alnst, where most things are said by showing them, it's clear that vivimeng put lots of thought behind the visuals). We know nothing about the behind-the-scenes between r6 and r7, so we can just LOOK at Till to see if something changed
I said that Till has some power over his outfit choices because he's the only one who personalizes them, or so it looks like. It's very much in Till's rebellious nature to vandalize his outfits and I think both the r2 outfit (the spray-painted t-shirt, the patch hiding his branding, the lack of shoes) and the scene we see in the top 3 video (with graffiti all over the room and paint all over him) are proof of that. He's always shown drawing and doodling, so i think it's a fair assumption that when we see that on his clothing, it's his handiwork.
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And that... disappears in round 6. Whether we look at his outfit in the actual round or when he's entertaining segyeins, he's dressed in muted, dark clothing. Very put together for his previous standards, almost elegant with his delicate, silver accessories (thin chains and tasteful earrings)
Gone is the asymmetry and the rage. Till is mourning and so he dresses for a funeral... either for Mizi (who's gone and presumed(?) dead) or for himself (without Mizi, he has no reason to keep going. he entered alien stage and stayed in anakt for her). Whether he 1) chose his outfits before and let the aliens take over in his grief or 2) fought the aliens on previous outfits to personalize them and stopped after r5, i think in both cases his clothes show how much he has given up
and then we have round 7
First of all, the color is back. Acid green and white pants. The tech gear too, in place of delicate chains. The hair is slicked back, similar to the scene out of stage in r6, but it doesn't feel as tamed
and i apologize in advance for the frame i'm about to use to prove this point (only scene we see till full figure in r7) but
THE SPRAY PAINTING CAME BACK!! on the pants!! Personally I think both the red and the two stripes are Till's addition, you could argue that the blood isn't bc it's just the pants done like this but it looks handmade to me, splotchy. Very likely to be Till's hand.
So going back to my initial point: something has changed between r6 and r7. In r7, Till FIGHTS with everything he has. He doesn't let Luka speak over him, he tries his best. He falters, but he enters the stage with a spark, a determination that was notably absent in r6
I think it's significant that we get this in Mizi's pov
because Mizi RECOGNIZES Till. Not in the sense that she didn't know it was him, but in the sense that it's the Till she knew from anakt: wild, rebellious, hateful towards the system. He's raging and screaming, putting on a wild performance.
And Ivan's sacrifice is what gets him like this. It allowed him to live, of course, but if we read deeper there's also something else. In r6, it's the first time we see Ivan openly defying the segyeins. It's pretty obvious that he didn't have the love Mizi had for them and he disobeyed multiple times (running away with Till is the prime example), but he put on a façade all the time. I would say it's exactly what allows him to get away with so much: he's so well-behaved that no one suspects him. He has no leash because, in the segyeins' eyes, he never tried to escape (and he never will, bc just like Till will choose to go back to Mizi every time, Ivan will stay for Till as well).
The only times we see him rebelling is: 1) the scene on the rooftop when he was still in the slums; 2) in r6, when he defies all expectations and "cheats" so that Till wins
Ivan fell in love with Till after seeing how defiant he was. And Till regains his spark, his will to rebel, after Ivan's sacrifice, when he chooses to publicly go against the aliens for the first time since he was a child.
i've seen a lot of talk about how Ivan was Till's downfall: because Till cared much more than Ivan thought, because Luka used that moment with Ivan (and not Mizi) to bring him down. It's all true and very tragic, but I think it's really important to note something else too
Till was able to be himself again (even if just for the span of a single song) because of what Ivan did. Ivan's act of love wasn't wasted.
#anyway ivan loved till for his rebellious nature and his rebellious act to save till is what woke till up from his suicidal misery#every time i write one of these posts i rewatch the mentioned rounds for accuracy so i end up crying every time lol#as a cosplayer i get so obsessed with clothing#also as a cosplayer there are no images of till's full body in r7. fuck off. i hate it here.#also i have another whole rant abt how till's clothing in r6 was so much more similar to ivan's style#and it's bc HE WAS SURRENDING AND BEING COMPLACENT TO THE SEGYEINS LIKE IVAN DID HIS WHOLE LIFE!!!#going insane as usual#also another rant on luka using ivan against till bc... he never saw mizi and till together... till love was so obvious and yet...#it would be extra funny if luka saw r2 and r6 and THOUGHT UNKNOWN WAS ABOUT IVAN LMAOOOO#bc if u think abt it Till turned towards the singers (mizi) but u know who was just beside her?#simp extraordinaire homotron3000 our boy Ivan#oh no i need to make another post abt this now#having revelations in the tags sorry everyone#anyway I want to analyze all of the cast's clothes bc it's very symbolic#ivan always hiding himself#mizisua exchanging colors#luka pure angelic perfect white#luka especially matches his opponent it's so interesting (i need to lobotomize him)#hyuna unfortunately has ONE outfit from what i remember it's tragic give my queen more clothes#alnst#alnst till#alien stage#ivantill#rant#alnst ivan#alnst mizi#alnst luka
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A Day in the Life of Jelly, the Whaler Wolfhound
my @dishonoredgiftexchange gift for @exalok, I hope you like my take on a small peek in the life of an old, overly affectionate puppy
you can very much ignore the dialogue
#dh#dishonored#dishonored gift exchange#dishonored whalers#comic#I am so very thoroughly sorry for my handwriting I promise its not on purpose its just how I be#I hope it is enjoyable nonetheless#the dialogue is in alt text in case its too bad or in case tumblr chewed it up and obliterated the quality#special thanks to sin the void-damned for helping me choose a name and enduring my excecssive bitching about the comic#and to everyone who saw this before posting and assured me it works
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FLAMING HOT TAKE INCOMING, DISCLAIMER FIRST: punch out is a game with no lore and little to no characterization so it’s natural that different people have different takes on a character and I 10000% respect that and I love seeing how people interpret stuff differently from me!!!!! this is not a dig or a diss this is just personal observation!!!!!!!!!!
i don’t get why the overall fandom consensus is that don flamenco is head over heels in love with the blonde lady [that the fandom calls Carmen (this I do understand why)] in his cinematic trailer. it’s always been apparent to me that this guy is supposed to be like a casanova/serial womanizer/harem enthusiast douchebag kinda guy.
1. country of origin and profession: every enemy character in this game is supposed to be an exaggerated cultural stereotype/caricature, so it’s natural to assume that most of their character traits are not meant to subvert audience expectations, and flamenco is no exception! Spaniards are stereotyped as carelessly romantic, and toreadors seem to be associated with more socially conservative or dare I say, sexist/woman objectifying behavior. it would be logical to presume that flamenco also embodies these traits
2. contender intro slideshow: most people (and I as well) like to use the final slide of his contender intro as evidence of his romantic status. however, I fail to see how it shows him as faithful; on the contrary, the fact that the girls around “Carmen” are a. (for one of them) also wearing roses - the same color as the one he’s giving her, in fact - and b. clearly looking shocked and disgusted seems to show me that those girls were also the object of flamenco’s short-lived affection and that the blonde girl is just his next “target” so to speak.
now how to justify his in-battle voice lines referring to his affection for carmen? well look no further than Carmen, the opera by Bizet, where the titular Carmen ends up being with a toreador (like don flamenco). it could be possible that he uses “Carmen” as a pet name for all of his flings rather than the actual name of his one true love
please feel free to prove me wrong bc I see nobody else with this interpretation and I wanna know why everyone agrees that he’s a faithful boyfriend/malewife lmao
#punch out#punchouthottakes#don flamenco#carmen mi amor#this was the one I thought tumblr deleted I’m so glad it didn’t cause this is really well written#ANYWAYS I find all your points very interesting and honestly I didn’t consider them from your point of view anon#I can understand why someone would see Don as just a womanizer it does fit into his stereotypical character#However as a cardon lover… I have a counterpoint#1) She has a more distinct design than all the other background characters. She still has the beady eyes the bg characters have#But her dress is so damn ugly I feel that it was intentional? Like why else would it look to different from everyone else UNLESS#She’s supposed to stand out as Don’s one love. There’s a bunch of others who love him but he still loves his Carmen even with that dress lo#2) for the “malewife” point take a look at Don’s NES quotes#For some reason he just randomly references Star Wars. Sure that could just be a reference from the game developers#But this is punch out we have SCRAPS when it comes to character interpretation#Don randomly referencing Star Wars makes me feel like he has some dorky side to him and he hides it with his whole Bullfighter persona#And so him being a malewife could be from the fact he’s secretly a dork and so surely he’d be all dorky and cringe with Carmen#Sorry this was long but again I LOVE discussion about the game#FORGOT TO SAY THIS TOO but Don’s VA said himself that Carmen was Don’s love#at least that’s how he saw it so take that info as you will
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#sorry not sorry#bruce wayne#tim drake#detective chimp#dc#saw some “whos the best detective in the dcu” discourse today#not sure why everyone thinks bruce is just default the best#just cause a couple people call him that from time to time#THIS IS A JOKE#PLEASE DONT COME FOR ME I AM VERY SMALL AND I CRY EASILY#anyways detective chimp supremacy#have a shitty meme!
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the exhausting slog of listening to anecdotal horror stories where rednecks are continually villified even if they dont do anything. "he was just so creepy... one of those fat mullet redneck types" ok and? ok and? and? ok? and the premise of the story is he smiled at you in passing? ok? and? there was one by someone who lived in the same kind of area i grew up but they were very proud to say they were middle class so you can imagine how many digs they took at the broke people around them that are systemically left to rot by the government. wow he only had two teeth? and theyre brown? are you going to step down out of your gold plated horse drawn carriage to pay for this man to go to a dentist? bc he sure as fuck couldnt afford to even if he wanted to. oh that guys fat? hes fat AND he has a mullet? doesnt he know only skinny middle class gen z kids are allowed to have those? what a disgusting perv. dont even get me started on old men who, oh god. wear flannel and have a truck. jesus fucking christ put them down already
#shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up#so called leftists when someone is poor and rural: oh god but what if hes got COOTIES? kill it kill it now before it looks at me ew ew ew#its like the hills have eyes out here its like deliverance all of these scary mean inbred hillbillies with no teeth and old cars ew ew eww#GENUINELY do me a favor and KYS#universal basic income and human rights for everyone except those uneducated racist smelly perverts who live in the mtns#except the mountains kind of go off and i like their stories and ''cryptids'' very marketable very demure very queercoded very removed#from all cultural context#oh you like appalachia? you like ''cryptids''? can you name a single community that the oral histories and stories came down from?#no and i know you wont because individually you would be terrified of any of those people if you saw them walking down the street#jesus fuck dude im so heated over this right now sorry
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sometimes I forget that my experience has been. um. not 'your experiences are not universal' vibes but more like 'your experiences are EXTREMELY atypical'
#red said#recent events have reminded me that my life has involved like. a LOT of other people's psychosis#like not in a way where i have been Beset By Terrifying Crazies bc that's not like. a thing.#but a lot of people in my life have had a lot of really severe psychotic episodes#and i FORGET sometimes. that actually that is an Unusual Amount Of Experience With Psychosis for someone who's not#for somebody who has not really personally ever had psychotic episodes (unless severe PTSD flashbacks count)#actually i tell a lie i have maybe had One psychotic episode but because it was very situational and i knew what was happening#i was able to ride it out. because i am literally only psychotic Inside Hospitals and so that's all fine#as long as i LITERALLY NEVER HAVE TO HAVE INPATIENT CARE. Very important to me to never ever ever require surgery i think.#i can handle the amount of psychosis i get from a 1-4 hour stopoff in hospital#as long as i know I'm leaving soon then i can just Cope with the fact that the walls are moving and reality is thin#ANYWAY that's not the point the point is i forget! that most ppl i know have experience of at most a handful of severe psychotic episodes#some people i know have experienced more for sure. especially if the episodes were mostly theirs.#but people really seem to expect me to be more freaked out by their symptoms of psychosis than i am#bc i don't think i really register it as frightening unless they're in actual danger or Currently Aggressing Actually At Me#like i WORRY about them bc it can super suck but it's not SHOCKING or WEIRD#there have definitely been times ive been frightened. one time i woke up in the night and my friend was standing over me with a knife#but also like he was still HIM he was just having a moment. and as soon as i got the knife off him he just came back and broke down.#and we were fine and he was safe and i learnt the valuable lesson that even when people seem like they wanna kill you they probably don't#tbf now I'm thinking about it it's honestly a tossup whether he was there to threaten or because he felt a need to guard us#like to be clear probably don't try and take a knife off someone having a psychotic break. i was 17 and it was 3am and i knew him very well#i probably did not make the smartest call but nobody got hurt is the point#anyway you know there's that kind of psychotic episode and my granny got very violently angry a few times. buuuut you know there's also#been plenty of other times I've been with somebody having an episode and it's been chill as hell.#my ex saw and heard monsters so much that eventually she just got sick of being scared. we used to watch TV with them#i would sometimes have to sit on a bit of sofa that wasn't haunted and we might not be able to watch certain things bc they didn't like it#most of the time she was hallucinating there was absolutely nothing to worry about we just had a few extra variables#honestly of everyone i know who's had psychotic episodes or schizophrenia the amount of times it's been a material risk#is like. low single figures? maybe low double if you include self harm but idk what the cause and effect is there.#idk why you would need to be frightened like 99.99% of the time it truly is usually just Oh No That Seems Distressing For You I'm Sorry
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I tried to read Robin & Batman (2021) and I had to stop because I hate Bruce in this so much. Like, wtf is he saying he wants to make Dick a soldier?! He took Dick because he saw himself in him and wanted to give him a better childhood, not to make him a mini-Batman, but to make him a better man than Bruce!
Anyway, here are some panels of Bruce and Dick in their early publication's history!
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Bruce's crying because his boy is crying! And they say the Dark Knight has no emotions!
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Bruce is so extreme in his love for Dick. He is like "If something happens to Dick, I'm going to cry so much, I will die of dehydration. Actually, I will torture myself to death. I will find the most painful way to take my own life. He is the most important thing in my life." Like here, Dick is being like "I'm running away!" and Bruce's reaction is "I would prefer to cut my arms off than lose you." He is so full of love for this boy, he is going to explode.
#batman#bruce wayne#dick grayson#robin#dc comics#my ramblings#me anytime I read a version of Bruce that is a bad parent: i think he should burn#Bruce has flaws as a man BUT there's a different with writing a man with flaws and writing an abusive parent#and I'm tired of people calling Bruce being written abusive as him being written with “flaws”#as someone who was raised by abusive parents abusing children isn't a character flaw it's a disgusting behavior#and making bruce a good parent isn't erasing his flaws good doesn’t mean perfect and everyone as flaws#YOU DON'T HAVE TO MAKE HIM AWFUL AND ABUSIVE TO GAVE HIM FLAWS#I just cannot hear people diminish abusive behavior as something a character needs to be “flawed”#sorry got pissy because I saw a post saying that we should let Bruce be awful#and there's another one I saw a while ago saying good dad Bruce was boring because he needs flaws (good parents have flaws)#(being a bad parent isn't a flaw it's an abusive of power and a crime it's not a flaw)#I'm very strict about child abuse sorry not sorry
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What happens when you win the debate on who's the most oppressed group in the transgender community. What happens then. What could be accomplished by finding the one group that is the single most downtrodden demographic that suffers at the hands of every other community and putting them up on the 'most oppressed' throne with a 'most oppressed' trophy that could not be accomplished if we listened and paid attention to individual and group needs and worked to address them without the need to determine 'who has it worst', or worse, 'who actually belongs to the most oppressed group'.
#spitblaze says things#there are times when certain groups will. in fact. be targeted harder than others and its important to uplift and rally around them#and this can be accomplished without turning the whole thing into a pissing contest#i am deliberately keeping this vague because who I'M mad at are the people who think the binarist infighting is any sort of helpful#and if you get into fights over 'okay but x group IS more oppressed' in the notes i will block you#also. btw. the trans community is not a binary of 'my group' and 'everyone else'. its not separate circles#its a big weird messy venn diagram full of people who dont just belong in one circle but might belong in several or all or none of them#any attempt you are going to make at strict categorization WILL fail because language is a very poor tool for determining the definitions#of things as weird and nebulous as 'gender'#sorry lol i have been trying to formulate this post for like an hour after i saw that our-transgender-experiences post#it is not the most perfect and beautiful and nuanced and kind compassionate post ever made. it is a vent post#if you want to read 'stop doing lateral aggression to figure out who has it worst' uncharitably that's on you.#SPITBLAZE SMASH
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Cool armored cores... I've always always used reverse joint legs, but Rusty's fake reverse legs are even better... I just love how they look zipping around with their little boosters and chicken legs 🥺
and also one romantic moment 🥰 H-hey Rusty~
#some of this may be drawn later#we'll see~#armored core#caffe personal#my ac is Luna#I was doing Rosy Maple... a pink and yellow one... but the white and green feels very nice for ac6 for whatever reason#That said... my 621 I'm calling the only pink girl on Rubicon#so who can even say#double zimmies are so scrubby and yet the moment I saw them#my heart knew what it needed#and I haven't wanted to use anything different at all looool#I didn't even notice the nerf#double zimmies baby#I added some zimmie love... and hate#love how they look tossing their trash away~#armored core posting#sorry everyone#you have to look at my brainworms
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Monster with a hundred faces
#Luke castellan#pjo#percy jackon and the olympians#my art#AND HERE COMES THE PJO HYPERFIX OUT OF LEFT FIELD BABY!!!!#specifically brainrotting over Luke bc my partner is the ceo of his character#I based my design partially on the tv show but w shorter flatter hair like in the books#I kinda wanna tag this specifically as#the titan’s curse#bc it’s very much inspired by his characterization in that book. manipulating and pulling strings. showing a different face to everyone#I mean that’s kinda his deal in general but the way he interacts w Annabeth and Thalia is so. OUGH.#lying to and using them to the point that Annabeth#the only one who still saw good in him#didn’t trust him and refused to run away#I mentally drew parallels between him and ladon and went a little insane over it sorry#monsters that have been trained for one sole purpose. hurting the ones they used to love in pursuit of it.#killing ppl with poison <3#or. attempting to. Luke didn’t do so well with that
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please. i need alastor with his hair up so we can see the side of his head. second set of ears or smooth flesh prairie?
#hazbin hotel#alastor#hazbin alastor#hazbin hotel alastor#alastor ears#alastor's flesh fields#bc husk has the ears on top as well#but his head is shaped like a cat and he has all the fur so it works#but alastor is mostly human shaped when he wants to be and his face head is distinctly skinful#so.#like imagine he's uncomfortable or embarrassed by it because it's *yet another* physical difference that#invites the taunts and abuse and humiliation he faced in life (and is thus very sensitive about in afterlife)#he already faces being a PREY animal of all things#so. imagine. he always ALWAYS makes sure his hair covers the side of his head. in his twisted victim mind the lack of ears makes him#Wrong and Disgusting and Untouchable and A Monster (and not in the satisfying fearful way he enjoys)#so he pushes it away. doesnt let anyone learn about his ugly disgusting mutation because surely SURELY if they saw it...#he could lose everything he's worked so hard for. because who would fear him? who would respect him? who would bother looking in his#direction? he would just be another lowlife Freak undeserving of love and attention and— well#thats what he would tell himself. but then one day niffty's doing his hair like he sometimes lets her#and he's just enjoying letting her have her fun. kinda spaced out; mostly just enjoyjng the rare sensation of a touch he doesn't despise#it doesnt even register when she pulls his hair up (maybe into lil space buns or smthn idk) that it leaves his empty face on display for all#i can imagine angel being the most outwardly shocked. some loud exclamation that turns everyones attention to alastor and his earless face#just. everyone staring at him. and he realises. and he hates himself for slipping like that and oh no theyre going to hate him and tell—#— everyone and he will lose all that hes been working towards with the hotel and he is just. So. mortified. think shameful reactions:#averted gaze; flushed cheeks; figeting under their stares; or perhaps the classic deer-in-headlights look as he freezes in shock#just as he feels everything crashing down around him. the others get ahold of themselves and share their reactions too#shock; confusion; endearment (charlie would 100% do a big AWW/want to touch it); reassurances galore when they see him retreat into his mind#they tell him it's normal (he's in hell; no longer a human but a demon; everyone looks odd by some standard)#they tell him it makes sense (he's a deer after all). they tell him his appearance is nothing to be ashamed of and that everyone is still#super intimidated and frightened by him ♡; that it doesnt change anything; that theyre sorry for whatever led him to believe otherwise
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