#venting in the tags so be careful
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the sexual tension between me and relapse
#venting in the tags so be careful#being bipolar and bpd at the same time feels like the worst nightmare#the slightest inconvenience will send me into a fucking spiral#people have always been telling me either to “cheer up” or “go to a mental hospital because I'm fucked in the head”#i perfectly know I'm incapable and unworthy of love#I'm starting to doubt if I'm able to love the right way at all#but I'm so sick of toxic positivity#not everything's going to be alright#sometimes bad things happen#and not everyone is supposed to be cheerful and grateful all the fucking time#it's just so tiring and exhausting#they really dont realize how much toxic positivity is damaging and so naive#tw depressing thoughts#idk how to tag this lol#rambles#actually bpd#bpd vent
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how am i meant to ha wahoo yippee through life in these conditions
#vu talks shit#in this past week i have#gone to urgent care without insurance#paid about half my bills#been reminded that i still owe someone another near 200 for a trip i leave for in TWO DAYS#AND i paid for a rental space for something that i am ADMITTEDLY VERY HAPPY ABOUT BUT STILL SO BROKE NOW#and i have done ZERO grocery shopping#and im not sure i have the money to do grocery shopping right now#but im scared to look at my bank account after shelling out nearly 1k on everything else#AND i have to take my cat back to the vet soon cause she's starting to have asthma attacks again#i need to put everything new in my shop and put shit up for pre order cause i got charms im working on#but mAn i just#cannot afford the distractions rn#vent#AAAAAAAAAAUGH#i didnt wanna put that but i am stressing in the tags now
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⚔️🦈
#twst#twisted wonderland#twst silver#floyd leech#suntails#adding tags retroactively bc i dont want to be too worrying. so ppl know my brother almost tried to . and i had to take care of it#and i got a 900 dollar medical bill today. and im unemployed. so it um. kinda broke the last straw. and twt has been miserable to touch#got in a small fight w my friend and i felt physically sick and ive been having little mini breakdowns like 3 times a day and im not used t#i dont get sad like this. i dont GET soul-crushingly upset. i dont get nervous. i normally j shut down and get thru stuff so im rly lost#sry for the vent i dont intend for it to act as such. i j wanted to give context for whats been going on bc a lot of ppl here r tumblr-Only#i rly liked this when i drew it bc i love silly meme outfits. i drew minions a lot when i was into hq so it felt like returning to my roots#im sure when i feel less empty ill be happy w this again
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always covered in your tears and their blood.
#homestuck#hom3stuck#home2t4ck#jake english#blood#admin draws#fanart#not pointless angst vent doodle mind you this one is specifically about him. but im not gonna overexplain i trust the caption says enough#jake is fascinating bruh i cant believe how i just ghosted over him on the first go#i have so many thoughts on this guy. primarily wanna saddle him withh aromanticism woes and also feigning ignorance to everyone#including himself to evade responsibility. adn the avoidant attachment type. and th#hes just fun. if ur seeing this and you dont care about jake bc he seems shallow give him a shot you might like what you find#you should all rly read borzoi's jake metas theyre. theyre really good i cant even paraphrase it here#ok my eyelid twwitching again im gonna wrap up tags and idk go write sum stupid shit. toodles.
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I can't imagine being anywhere near as insane as Trump supporters because my dad told me that he, earlier, drove past a guy putting a "Harris Walz 2024" sign outside his house and decided to yell out at him "TRUMP 2024 YOU COCKSUCKER" and flip him off. And he laughed when he told me because he thinks that yelling at a man (emphasized man because he thinks men should be "better" than women, and "better" would be voting for Trump in this case) who is voting for a "whore who slept her way to the top" (his exact words) is funny. And expected me to laugh with him. And got angry when I didn't and just stared at him in disbelief. Even though he already knows that I don't like Donald Trump. These people fully expect others to find their weird ass derogatory words and behavior FUNNY. Donald Trump is leading a cult of old people who he brainwashed into being delusional with him.
#vote blue#harris walz 2024#kamala harris#tim walz#i know some fucker is gonna be here saying like “it's true i was the tree”#i didn't see this with my own two eyes but i've lived 21 years with my dad and i HAVE seen him do shit like this#but it was mostly just honking at random people on the sidewalk or yelling “WHERE Y'GOING” in their direction out the window#like it's still embarrassing and weird but not derogatory#and since being retired and having nothing to do all day except watch trump and more trump and more trump he has gotten worse#not a day has gone by in the last four months where he hasn't insulted joe biden or kamala harris#and every single time he has expected my brother and i to laugh at his insult even though he knows that we don't like trump#it's so depressing watching your own parent become a worse person#he was already one of the insufferable republicans before trump and now he's a trump republican which is even worse#and yk what's even worse it's that my mom has no spine against men so if her boyfriend asks for her to vote trump she'll be like “okay”#she's not a republican she just doesn't care because she thinks voting doesn't matter#my aunt who i have always loved so much now calls up my dad to talk about trump with him and i never heard her swear until this year#my other aunt makes talking about trump her entire personality when she has a gambling addiction she should be treating instead#my dad's side is a bunch of trump supporters and my mom's side just doesn't give a fuck#and i can't vote because i'll get kicked out of here faster than the speed of light the second my dad sees#the paper in the mail saying that my voter history has been updated#even if it's not public who i voted for because he knows that whoever i vote for will never be trump#sorry#tag vent#this sucks#please vote
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💜💜💜💖💖🎶
I want to make otherkin/therian (or alterhuman/nonhuman, whatever term y'all prefer) friends, but interacting with people is so scary and half the time I barely have the motivation to function, let alone socialize.
So...uh.........
Be my friend? Please? 🥹
(No pressure of course)
(Also, I've realized that I forgot to mention that I'm 19 since it was never relevant to this blog. So, keep that in mind before dming. <3)
#i dont mind how yall want to communicate (dms/comments/reblogs/asks) i dont care#i just want friends#otherkin#alterhuman#otherkin community#alterhuman community#nonhuman#nonhuman community#otherkin stuff#otherlink#otherhearted#otherhuman#otherkin struggles#otherkin things#come interact with me#pwease#:)#<3#no pressure#probably better if im ignored#im annoying and socially akward/anxious#and im low enough in the tags on this post to easily get away with being self deprecating#so ill just say i suck and am annoying and inconvenient so you should probably ignore me and save your time#i doubt ill actually respond#dont mind me just casually hating myself in tags#god i hope no one actually reads these tags#im such a pick me attention seeker :(#venting in the tags is fun#cuz no one will see them#geez how many tags do i have left
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smells are hot since you can condition subs into going from 0 to ferally horny by making them smell your pits or pussy or etc over and over until they cant get even a whiff without getting fully hard/wet
inchresting….. 👀
#clarke answers#musk kink#i’m still not down with my own BO i fear 😖 i have too much personal trauma from my ex always saying i smelled bad (even when i didn’t#and she later admitted to lying/‘just joking’ about it!!!) and i would constantly shower and put on so much deodorant and ugh#the thought of someone smelling my BO just gives me so much anxiety now and i’m careful to smell as good as i possibly can#anyways sorry for the tag vent…… this is a hot concept. the idea of conditioning someone to get hard/wet at my pussy smell is esp hot
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i’m not normally one to bring negative vibes onto my blog but i’ve gotten a sudden wave of unease being on here tbh so im considering drifting from here for a little bit once more. i’ve thought about creating a new blog but also wouldn’t want to waste the masterlist that i’ve worked hard to build for the people who enjoy my work + support me!
i’ve never had a super close circle of friends as such on here but i’m very grateful for the few friends i have made that continue to interact with me. i do really enjoy tumblr and i love creating, i’m grateful for the interaction i get and i know i’ve been on here a while but there always seems to be a sort of uneasiness that i feel stems from previous problems with other people on here.
it can feel a little silly from a blog like me feeling a little ‘outcasted’ and i don’t even know if i’d use that word, but i’ve just never been one that felt comfortable with the sort of underground, high school energy that i sometimes feel radiate around here. i guess i sometimes feel like i’m walking on egg shells to avoid sub posts / bad energy because i really only want to enjoy myself! but yeah, i’m gonna be less active for a few days atleast because i really need the rest anyway after my holiday + a few things on here have just sort of triggered my mental health.
but just know i love all of u, thank u for everything no matter what <3
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#ʚ・◞📎 — em entry.#cw vent#i’m gonna tag this cos ew it feels so gross to even post this like i don’t want sympathy i’m just spiralling i fear#idk sometimes i just get the random urge everyone is talking about me + normally i wouldn’t care ….#but if it hits at a bad moment w my anxiety / bpd it just sends me off the deep end sob
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any time i remember that trump supporters are in any way associated with christianity i feel fcking insane
#i dont wanna vent too much on the internet#its just . like. a fucking anomaly. these things do not fit together. i dont understand#contradictory to the point of nausea#textpost tag#i dont know i feel like i should. i have so many (scattered)thoughts i want to put together#like there are. important things. and i want everyone to... like i love god. and i know that this is so important and i want everyone to#understnad and have access to that. like deep soul fulfilling stuff. and the core of beautiful love for everyone forever . etc im tired rn#but then some fcking how. the . hell world we live in and like constructed human culture and such#twists it all in a way that makes it so inaccessible to so many people#and i look around and im just horrifiei#i know this might sound like a less important topic to some but to me and my understanding its like. to be able to know christ *is* the#best thing that can happen for someone#and prioritising that comes from a place of i just care about people so much. and i want. good things . obviously.#i dont wanna come off as annoyingly preachy i just. i really mean what i say#and when that gets fcked with im like head explosion.#the love of christ compels us for we are convinced one died for all. etc#maybe ill write my thoughts coherently one day
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Ok rant time so putting under the cut //
This is about the whole Peggy/Dottie and Agatha/Rio parallel thing that people keep talking about and yes it's been bothering me. I mean, we are what, kind of 2 months after the show's finale now? so I get to rant a little, and I won't do so on other people's posts and art cause I am not an asshole duh so this is the best way to get it off my chest ha ha…I've seen the parallel gifsets and I have seen some posts floating around about it and every time I see them I am like but but that is so not a parallel!! It really isn't… other than it being a kiss between 2 women and them both being marvel properties. Because then by that standard every wlw kiss is a parallel of each other lol!
Peggy and Dottie are antagonists ( u can read it as romantic. I am not gonna stop you. Hayley and Bridget had great chemistry) but there's no history between them prior to the show. Peggy doesn't even clock Dottie as a threat initially. The reason why the kiss comes off as a surprise to her, she never anticipated it and that's why Dottie was able to get so close without rising any suspicion…
Rio also didn't anticipate the Kiss and that's why she initially failed to realize that it wasn't just a kiss but also Agatha siphoning her power and surrendering to Death!
so if we are counting the surprise element as the parallel then ok this one I'll concede.
But that's the end of it right?
The two kisses are fundamentally different in intent and visualization. I need to know that people understand that, cause if not you are really reducing the magnitude of the vidarkness moment
The Peggy/Dottie kiss is a ploy , it's for shock, to frame Peggy and get her locked up, to buy Dottie time to execute her masterplan, also Dottie initiates the kiss and Peggy suffers the consequences so even from a purely visual angle they don't match up.
In contrast the vidarkness kiss has so much heart to it, Agatha chooses to kiss Rio and the consequences are faced by both, it's not merely done for shock value, they have been building up to it, this was the culmination of a season long narrative arc, for Agatha to finally reconcile her loss of Nicky and her love for Rio and that they can co exist cause she realized that the blame doesn't lie with them, that sometimes boys just die, that out of death comes life and viceversa, that life runs in tandem with death. So her choosing to sacrifice herself by surrendering to her love, it puts to rest (it might be temporary but still) the war that had been waging inside her, the immense guilt and heartbreak that they were both dealing with. Love can't conquer all neither can it lessen the impact of grief but as we all know and hopefully believe- it does persevere.
The point is-I know most posts are tongue and cheek but it doesn't take much time for it to shift in tone and for nuance to get lost in the process. I have seen that shift happening, people being annoyed that the only time we get to see women kiss in mcu they are just getting conned or that it's a cheap trick( or queerbaiting) but that's so not the story when it concerns Agatha and Rio. I don't really get bothered with bad readings when it's some random dudebro but when it's people who claim to be fans doing this, it definitely grates on my nerves. Not saying you can't have a different take, and this show had it's limitiations, the lack of a backstory for Agatha and Rio is still a stinger for me personally, but I also liked the show for what it managed to explore and I appreciate the care that they put in making the show. So I guess I just want to encourage these kind of creatives and want them to feel empowered and bold enough to create more diverse stories. I know this is * piss on the poor* website but please please I need people to stop reducing stories into 5 sentence badly written summaries as if it's been generated by chatgpt, cause that's really counterproductive imo.
// that's the rant, sorry anyone who stumbled upon this suddenly and had to deal with my wordy and somewhat nonsensical ramble lol. I will shut up and go back to scrolling for pretty arts and fics on my dash now. Thanks and goodbye.
#it's because I am in a mood and I needed to vent and this is my blog so yeah#weird thing is people never talk about marvel runaways in this context when I feel#if we are doing surface level parallels I would think deanoru is closer to vidarkness I guess#and they are also one of the first wlw marvel couples but nobody seems to care hmmmmmmmm!#I be talking to the void#pet peeve but also like pls ffs nuance is important#rant post#**sorry if there's typos I am on my phone and I have huge thumbs fml#tag ramblings#for ts
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thought about only talk about this on private but too big emotion impulse control not working (not that it ever do) n aware this bitter unfair extreme binary dichotomy exaggerate “catastrophizing” or whatever but 👍 right now don’t care. yea autism ugly trauma for be ignored abused in community ugly
seeing two group people on that post about LSN level 1 (etc) autistics that escaped containment
1. those who regulars on our (general our, HrSN / level 2&3 / severe / nonverbal / comorbid ID / whatever language we use describe self) blog who interact reblog listen ally who hyper anxious about them speak over us that they forget they allow exist too allow say struggle too without disclaimer about them “be LSN/level 1/etc n so not nearly as bad/can never understand”. aka who post was about. it okay you can exist as self can relax can take up space
2. those who probably never reblogged stayed followed intentionally listened on purpose try learn more about us beyond occasional reblog on their dash, maybe this first time ever see someone like me. maybe this first time they ever reblog from someone like us n it post validating them. or only time ever talk about people like us is to talk about how they always be compared to us n people who invalidate them use us invalidate them (which sucks but if this the literal only time you remember we exist. come on). never listened to A WORD by us unless we used as this mythical group (that only exist in concept not actual humans around them) that can be used for their argument speak for us by speak over us. n cannot bear thing not about them n selective cherry pick post. you all need be prescribed very different post
it shows
#🍞.txt#vent#anger tw#idk what tag this lol#‘think about why this post about LSN get so much more notes so faster than posts abt HSN’ ‘oh it because LSN get invalidated’#…. yea unfortunately they do n it sucks but that not really whole reason why such BIG DIFFERENCE in notes is it#don’t care about notes numbers but do because it represent how many people got to reach got to hear
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sorry if there's an increase in horniness levels on my blogs. im only regaining a taste for life I thought I had lost forever.
#these might have been mentally the most difficult 6 months of my life#but im so glad I got to live those past few days#and hoping for much more to come#ig what im trying to say is thank you to my awesome mutuals#y'all cute af#now this is getting long#sry for the awkward tags and venting on main#love y'all#take care#🫂🫂🫂#im just gonna lay over here#ugly crying over how good it feels#to have people that make me feel loved and happy again
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Errmmm Ig I wanted to draw Justin losing it a lil. Lik his obsession of order is kinda driving him a lil cuckoo and the light is kinda possessing him? An uncertainty that things will go back to the way they were. A fear of the unknown?
#myart#Justin#Idk if I'll tag it as Belle#Prob not#I don't think ppl care much for Justin anyways lmao#Is this vent art? Maybe#I love Justin sooo much you guys. It hurts xD#I just think Justin is such an unique character#He's so flawed and contradicting that it compels me#I like to characterize him base on his actions in the movie#Expand on the things he do and why he does it.. It's fun :)#Anyywayyys#Hope yall have a good one ;)
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Lately I've only been wishing to grab a comic about my favorite character and just have a genuinely good time reading it.
#I can't remember the last time I took a Deadpool comic and genuinely had a good time about it#I hate the direction they took with his character and it's so disrespectful that I don't even talk about I don't even think *any* Deadpool#fan genuinely talk about it because were so tired of his kids characterization we all just collectively decided to ignore whatever hell#marvel through at him#but rant aside#it's just–#I am not sure if comic books are fun anymore I don't even know who I am making content for half of the people on my notes haven't touched#comic book and aren't pretending to do so#people who read the comics tend to be so mean or bitter about it that even if you follow most will be angry about something#comic or fan related and I don't know if I can blame them but following that is draining#and as much as I was trying to be a good sport about it you make a post about comic book characters and#and the overwhelming response is 'I don't read the comics but'– following up by a take about them that doesn't even recognize any core#aspect of their personality that you can't even grasp you can't even recognize them#you can't recognize them on tue cannon you can't recognize them on the fannon#and no matter how engaging you try to make content about the fandom people just–*refuse* to read it. And then– they *refuse* to tag fannon#content as fannon#and *refuse* to leave either#Yes we are all having fun but how can a character tag be so so filled with people who have no idea of who they are#how can a character can be properly loved and take care of and have content that respect them if no one makes any attempt to *know them*#and it's disheartening because *comics* are supposed to be fun *fannon are supposed to be fun*#but for aome reason it's really *really* hard to have fun here anymore#I created this page to share my love for the characters I care about and see more content of people who care about them too#but I can't even *find* people who care about them any more and when I do they're all so angry and upset– And I *cant even blame them*#I just... I don't know why I am doing this anymore or for who I am doing this anymore#sorry to vent but it's been a while since I haven't been had a genuinely good time™ enjoying comics#I don't think even people who write those comics enjoy those comics or care about those characters#Sometimes feels like everyone is projecting on those characters rather than *writing about them*. And I can't find them anymore#fanfics used to be about love petters to characters who you love#nowadays seems like a competition to see who makes more funny words with tropes pre-written since 2007#vent
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can someone nice (!!) please please please adopt me im begging you im requesting you (huge word vomit and vent in tags, pls dont read if u dont want to!! and if you don't want this stuff on this blog PLS lmk!! i dont wanna make anyone uncomfy! )
#tw vent#yes ik i have a vent blog#but idk why i dont wanna go there#ill prolly delete this in a while + if i vent here (which ill try not to) ill always tag it#but if any of yall aren't fine with it pls do lmk!!! ill stop <3#Anyways.#fucking hell i hate this.#dude#i very specifically told them to hurry the fuck up THEY were the ones making us late#i have told them a hundred times the minimum time i jeed to get ready#i told them this morning too that you guys make us late then put it all on me#nad she went like oh no dear dont worry that wont happen#WELL GUESS WHAT BITCH#and like the lecture and huge ass scolding and then cold shouldet ive been getting from BOTH of them before i left for coachinh#im just tired atp#idk its not even that big a deal this happens everyday#i dont know how to feel#idk if im even rly feeling anything atp#its just that i really fucking hate being here#I wanna get the fuck out#but thing is this makes me feel kinda guilty occasionally#for eg a few days ago i was rly sick and she took care of me kinda#and then that made me feel bad for hating her#but then things like this happen and i cant help it and i feel so conflicted#i dont want to stay here i know that for sure but i feel guilty for it#if i speak im being rude and backtalking#if i dont speak im being rude and ignoring#the fuck am i supposed to do????#she always tells me to 'stay silent and just hear it'#and when i do that she keeps shouting again and again and finally i say smth bc although its extremely fucking dumb of me to open my mouth
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I was having a good day, but then I saw some Queerphobia (Mostly Aphobia, like a large mostly) and i started to just read the shit comments ... So yay...
#tw: aphobia#aphobia#tdlosk#aromantic#asexual#aroace#transgender#queer#btw#I'm not arguing if he is or isn't#genuinely i do not care#but calling people stupid for believing he is#saying that aspec people are horrid and disgusting#fuck you#FUCK YOU#no one who said they saw him as aro/ace was rude about it#so fuck you#and#do fucking better#vent post#vent in tags
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