#vaginal pain

[certifiedsexed]

hi... i have a vagina. and this has been getting at me as ive started to get sexually active with my boyfriend, im not sure if its normal or if were doing something wrong. Ive never fingered myself or anything so being on the receiving end with him is my first experience with this. Im finding fingering and oral to be rather painful, even before any things even inside me. is it normal? is there a way to go about it that isnt painful?

Hi! Okay, so unless you know you have a condition that causes vulvar/vaginal pain, oral and fingering should not hurt unless you want it to. It could be that you're being too rough or not using enough lube but if you're being careful and using plenty of lube and still experiencing pain, that means something else is going on.

It could be something simple, like a yeast infection or it could be something more complicated like vulvodynia but either way, it's definitely something you want to be seeing a doctor [preferably a OBG/YN] about. It's not "normal", it's your body telling you something is going on that needs attention.

Hope this helps! Lemme know, especially if you have anymore questions! <33

[ineffectualdemon]

Ok real talk I need some advice from my fellows people with vaginas

I often get "cramps" which is actually spasms just within the entrance of the birth canal and sometimes through my whole groin and sharp stabbing pains in my cervix like someone is jabbing it with an icepick

And everyone else has either told me I'm lying because that's not what cramps are like and "you can't feel pain like in your cervix"

Or just ignores me

TBC I do also get regular cramps in my lower abdomen or lower back at the same time but the jabbing cervix pain is the worst part

Also I get ice pick pain at random times in my cycle. It's not tied to period pain exclusively though it happens more then and it's not linked to clotting because it happens even though I had an my uterine lining removed

But people have told me my entire life that my uterine pain and bleeding was normal even when I couldn't walk because of it and was fainting

So I don't really trust the medical professionals in my life

ETA my actual fucking question

Is this normal?

Does anyone else experience this?

What the fuck it?

I've had it happen since I started puberty

[pdpsolutions]

Understanding Pain During Penetration: Causes and Solutions

Pain during penetration, also known as dyspareunia, can have various causes, both physical and psychological. Understanding these causes is crucial for finding appropriate solutions. read more...

[certifiedsexed]

Certified Sex Ed Post!

got a good grade in physical therapy because i ordered a sex toy life is fun

[the-worst-fe-player]

Going to the hospital :/

[cookinguptales]

frank discussion of gynecological issues and frustrations with OBGYNs (especially re: chronic illness) under the cut, but I guess also potentially useful information for people who want to hear about it

so... some of you might remember when I was going to OGBYNs a little while ago. I have endometriosis and PMDD diagnoses, so going to OBGYNs isn't exactly unusual for me, but I ended up going to see more than I usually do.

this was largely because the hormonal therapy that I was taking for those disorders was starting to fail and I was bleeding a lot. like... for weeks at a time over a period of months. I had to deal with some... frustrating OBGYN advice in this time (such as the rage-inducing "well, women have to bleed") but I also discovered that like... I mean, I think I always knew that I had more vaginal pain than other people I know, but a lot of things hurt me so I just kind of... ignored it?

but they tried to put me on the nuva ring for a little while during this period and my body just... straight-up rejected it. it hurt like a bitch to put in, it kept coming out, I could feel it in there and it hurt, etc.

I ended up comparing notes with some other people I know and realized that my problems with insertion were probably more severe than I'd thought. like, it is not unusual for me to cry during pap smears and have cramping for days afterward. I cannot use tampons without massive pain. your body is not really supposed to physically expel something like a nuva ring several times a day. tmi I guess but I have not found penetration of any kind pleasant.

so I talked to... I want to say four or five different OBGYNs in this period, and none of them gave me a real reason for this. the prevailing attitude was mostly "oh yeah, that happens sometimes. lmao."

the best I could get was a diagnosis of "vaginismus" on my chart, and when I pressed for more information, they basically told me it was a psychological thing where your body is afraid of penetration so it clenches up and won't unclench. they literally grilled me on my history of sexual abuse to see if they could find the source of my dick phobia.

now... not to get too into it, but I do have a history of CSA -- but my pain problems predate it. I got my period relatively early and I've never been able to use tampons or anything like them. every time I've tried has ended in literal tears. again, cramping pain for days, even after the period itself has stopped.

so I get the dick phobia diagnosis from two different doctors, but one of them says she can do a transvaginal ultrasound if I'm really worried. we do this and it is uh. excruciating, honestly. thank god it was in California and they let me get high as a kite.

in the end, they can't find anything "physically" wrong with why I'm in pain and they send me on my way, dick phobia dx in hand.

today. today. YEARS later. I am googling tips on how to try a menstrual cup if you have vaginismus (prep for the trip abroad; I don't like Japanese pads) and I see someone saying "oh, I'm glad that treatment worked for you, my problems are because of ehlers-danlos syndrome."

you know, one of the chronic illnesses I have and one that I divulged to every OBGYN I saw.

what.

paging Dr. Google!!!

I come to find out that folks that have EDS, because of their connective tissue issues and extremely brittle skin, sometimes deal with extreme gynecological pain. it's partially pelvic floor issues, partially the fact that the skin in your vagina is breaking.

so all those times that I said "it feels like it's cutting me" or "it feels like knives" were probably because it was fucking cutting me. all those times I said I felt scraped raw for days was probably because abrasions take a long time to heal when you have EDS.

I cannot believe. I cannot believe. that I went into so many different OBGYNs who told me that my pain issues were because I had a psychological fear of dicks and when I told them I was a lesbian were like "oh well then problem solved" when actually my body was physically tearing. I had even seen blood sometimes and it had always been dismissed as spotting.

the anger I feel rn is indescribable, tbh. I never bought that my problems were all in my head (probably because doctors used that line on me so often when I was a kid and getting other chronic illnesses diagnosed) but the fact that gynecological health science is still so fucking awful that we shrug off pain that is the symptom of dangerous chronic illnesses as "well that happens sometimes" or "have you considered that maybe you're afraid of sex?"

I JUST

this reminds me of when I had to find out from a fucking tumblr post that vaginal secretions are made from blood rather than glands, so if you have bad blood pressure/flow it'll often cause itchiness/dryness/pain. bad blood flow like... idk... maybe POTS.

so again, it was actually one of my known chronic illnesses causing gynecological issues, not any of the other bullshit reasons doctors were giving me, like age or stress.

I hate that I'm fucking 33 years old and I still have to learn stuff like this from google searches. I still don't know how my shitty body works, and it's largely because of stuff like this. what the fuck. I'm so mad. why do doctors still treat vaginas like a fucking scary mystery?

I'm well aware that Dr. Google doesn't always know what the fuck it's talking about, but apparently neither do my doctors! which is why, yet again, I'm up all night reading medical journals in the vain attempt to figure out how to actually live my life!

ugh!!!

[thecandyclusteragain]

Holy shit major pelvic floor breakthrough

I have vaginal atrophy from T, but before starting T I had some significant pelvic floor issues. The things (besides medication) that you might do to help with vaginal atrophy or temporary symptoms are things I was already doing to treat my pelvic floor dysfunction so that worked out.

When it comes to medications though, I cannot take topical vaginal estrogen. My doctor who prescribed my T and my gyno both suggested this thing called a vaginal moisturizer (the specific brand Replens). For a long time (like years, almost two years to be exact) I just didn't because I didn't think something OTC would actually be helpful. But I finally started it a few months ago after trying the replens vaginal moisturizing lube and really liking it and this whole time not really noticing any difference BUT TODAY I was able to marathon masturbate for 3 hours, orgasm multiple times, AND DIDN'T HAVE CRAMPS AFTER ORGASMING

If YOU have vaginal atrophy and can't or don't want to use topical estrogen, GET A VAGINAL MOISTURIZER

CHANGE YOUR LIFE

[theorderofthetriad]

guess who has to get a cervix biopsy? >:/

[certifiedsexed]

hi! i feel quite silly sending in an ask here as im not a big sex-haver, and the issues im having arent really related to intercourse (god i hope not)

im a fat person with a vagina, education on fatter bodies is very scarce and i guess i just dont know what to do!! im feeling like super immense pain in my vaginal area, especially the opening, which is weird because i dont have frequent sex neither do i masturbate super often. its like really painful and causes me to become nauseous and in some cases ive even had to leave rooms and go home early. im on testosterone, but its only been 2-3 months. i am disabled (chronic pain, illness and other stuff) and i do try to keep myself at least decently clean. is there something i have to look out for? infections, atrophy, etc.?

sorry if i sound desperate or weird im just pretty sure nobody could answer this question without invalidating my fatness, queerness, disabilities, or. my whole self. thank you so much for all you do, ive found comfort in your blog allowing me to explore sexuality and feel peace in my body!!!!

Hi! No need to feel silly, I don't mind at all. <3

Now, even if you were masturbating and/or having sex frequently, you shouldn't be feeling immense pain in your vulva/vagina. But depending on your disability, having chronic pain can include vulvodynia [or chronic vaginal/vulva pain], which sounds a lot like what you're describing.

Testosterone can cause vaginal atrophy, so that's 100% worth looking into, as is a yeast infection, especially if you're also also experiencing vaginal discharge of strange colors [like yellow] and/or experiencing trouble peeing.

[Also, if you're experiencing pain in your bum and while going to the bathroom, and/or numbness, and your general pain improves when standing and/or lying down, maybe check out pudendal neuralgia, because I know that can be a likely commorbid with certain disabilities!]

Also checking if there's a possibility you're allergic to anything that comes into contact with your vulva is a good idea too!

Sometimes people develop allergies and/or allergies get more severe over time and they don't realize, so checking if switching things like underwear, soaps, and/or toilet paper out could be useful.

You don't sound weird, no worries! I understand it's really hard to get answers about things like this with all the bias in the medical system, especially if you're considered a "diverse" person (I have the same issue all the time).

[I'd still recommend seeing an OBG/YN but I understand why that might not be an option.]

You're very welcome, I'm happy to have helped. <33 Lemme know if you have anymore questions!

[horsegirlalexkralie]

Honestly, you're over here reblogging about sexualizing jesus christ and the correlation to Alex and I am. Looking respectfully. With my bigass gremlin eyes.

I also have a character from a project I'm working on that has religious symbolism surrounding them and I think they would be on that level, as well.

did u know certain medieval sects of christianity interpreted christ's side wound (where the moravians believed the eucharist came from) artistically as a vagina. i just thought that was interesting

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

I am in pain. Everywhere. All of the time.

It's a burning feeling. Because of the overgrowth at the top of my body that the bottom of my body cannot support. I feel like I'm carrying a heavy weight and I'm hugely disproportionate.

My joints all ache all the time.

You know how when you take a deep breath, your ribs expand? Well, when I do that, my ribs stay open, and I have to put my hands at either of my sides and like, close them back in, or they just stay like that and it hurts. And I believe that's due to binding.

My vocal cords hurt. My original voice was very, very high pitched. And my singing voice is gone. Were I to be in danger, there's no way for me to scream. And even just talking for long periods hurts.

I was told that I would have vaginal atrophy, but I didn't know what that meant. Vaginal atrophy involves the shrinking, thinning and pretty much disintegration of the vagina. Mine is so small that I can no longer use tampons.

I did not know that this was going to happen to my body when I gave "informed consent."

==

This is what "gender affirming care" looks like.

[evildykery]

All that grief and stress and genuine tears and physical pain endured just to find out I don't actually need to do all that. Silly me.

[puttingwingsonwords]

people like to scaremonger about the ‘negative’ effects of testosterone but every time I’ve thought about them and really considered them I’ve realised those are exactly what I want.

being hairy? yeah that’s the point. smelly? I do want to smell like a guy actually. bottom growth? I was hesitant at first but yeah I would love that. might get bottom surgery too now that I’ve thought about it! going bald? idk how I’ll feel when the time comes but when I think about myself as an old man, I don’t see someone with a full head of hair!

like I know all of these things aren’t for everyone and there are people for whom the pros and cons are difficult to weigh against each other but it would be nice if people would stop assuming no one would ever want these things.

[simptasia]

i'm getting my cervix poked today and not in the fun way. nevertheless it must be done, and i highly recommend cervical screenings to anybody that procedure applies to. early detection is so so important when it comes to cancer, my mum would still be alive if they found it in stage one, so i implore you not to ignore your body

[saentorine]

"I don’t mind paying to use public restrooms because the paid ones are cleaner!” Then you clearly do not experience the profound frequency that can make paying-per-pee an itemized travel expense akin to an extra meal in my food budget, nor the level of urgency that has prevented me from ever turning down a restroom opportunity when I need it, which is constantly. We are not the same.