#until this year! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

itspileofgoodthings · 2 years ago

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the answer to the question of why I am this way is very often anxiety

#I know it’s not my personality etc. etc. but truly never been able to so clearly see how much anxiety I have #until this year!#my very matter of fact counselor: your base line level of anxiety is very high #me: surprised pikachu face #anyway it’s kind of helpful to just see how it has exacerbated so many things over the years that I used to just think …. Was me #and like. It IS. But it’s also a bent/slant/wiring to my make-up that is separate from me #so it just makes sense. like yes I am sensitive and I hate when people say mean things about things I love #but the panic I feel when people don’t agree or word something harshly???? that has manifested physically in me for my entire freaking life #that’s not because of how deep my attachment to it is or some weird psychological reason bound up in the wording of the hurtful phrase #or in the thing I loved itself #Like I used to think it was #It’s just …. anxiety #i don’t have to intellectualize all of it. some things are just triggers and it sets things in motion #it’s hard to know what the triggers are and it’s also funny to reflect on what can be #because I am a very specific fiercely attached funny little bean with a very definite history that has shaped me #but just trying to plumb the depths of every situation that has ever hurt me to try to find some deep truth about why I’m hurt #And what reality I’ve touched on that is causing me pain #It just isn’t what’s happening. It’s pretty simple #I honestly had this breakthrough once about Taylor and why taylor criticism made me anxious #Like I just always externalized all of it in that i would be like it hurts me because of the way taylor is or something #but there was this one moment where it was like it’s upsetting you because of you #But then I put it away and went back to analyzing the world and her externally lol #Anyway it’s going to be a journey! But it does feel pretty big that I’ve been able to reach it here #Also it’s so weird because it’s like shouldn’t I have known earlier? Shouldn’t other people have known earlier? And many DID #but also. I don’t always display it well #I make eye contact! I smile! I speak confidently!!!#And actually a lot of people are like ‘she’s fine she can handle this’ and it’s like I can’t I will DIE #I was talking to Maria the other day about this and she pointed it out to me.#I don’t look vulnerable and I don’t look like you can hurt my feelings by being like ‘I don’t really care for Kylo Ren’#But you CAN and yes that’s the deep love but it’s also the anxiety! I think it’ll just be learning to balance those things in me. Not erase

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haridraws · 3 months ago

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#'babe are you ok you're redrawing lotr screenshots again'#fanart #lotr #these are a redo of some from 6 years ago. I wanted to see improvement. and also stare at these words until they're in my brain

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qiinamii · 26 days ago

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new guy in the Express

bonus:

adding more to the whimsy

#so i have to be forward with this after all the xiao spree these past 2 years i was close to None feeling interested to doing hsr art #until now LMAO #primary reason being: sunday #like i swear he used to be annoying as a villain but there's something so sad and cute about how he's changed until he boarded the AE #it altered my entire brain chemistry #so anyway i'm actually not supposed to post online until i have work done but #courtesy to anon when i was merely visiting my acc for a bit on that bowtie cat proposal... this is for u to rb <3 await the other post too #sunday hsr #march 7th #trailblazer #dan heng #AE quartet #yes absolutely that needs to be a tag #qiiarts #honkai star rail #hsr

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iwritelmao · 1 month ago

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Penelope: hey since you’re “not my kind and gentle husband” could you move that wedding bed bc I’m actually supposed to share that with my husband so…

Odysseus: *has just killed 108 people* *has not seen his wife in twenty years* *goes batshit at this bc THATS THE OLIVE TREE WHERE THEY FIRST MET!!*

Telemachus: oh hell nah, idgaf who you are no one yells at my-

Penelope: NO?! YOU WONT?! YEAH, I KNOW BECAUSE YOURE MY MAN! SO DONT PULL THAT EMO SHIT AGAIN OR YOULL SLEEP IN THE WEAPONS ROOM

…

Telemachus: my parents are perfect for each other

#a soldier who’s been off committing atrocities for twenty years and a spartan woman with twenty years of pent up rage #ofc their love language is gonna be yelling at each other until they start to make out #epic musical #epic the musical #epic the ithaca saga #odysseus #odysseus epic #penelope of ithaca #epic penelope #epic odysseus #epic telemachus #telemachus #odypen

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notrobinsomethingworse · 2 months ago

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Dick (Nightwing) and Jason (Robin) stare at Bruce. One sports pleading eyes, the other a shit eating grin. There’s a child between them with black hair and blue eyes.

Bruce, he doesn’t know what’s happening but he doesn’t like it: No.

Dick, grinning: He’s our younger brother now.

Jason, nodding seriously: You’re not gonna take him from us.

Tim, got kidnapped while taking photos of patrol, just happy to be there: Where’s the Batcave?

Bruce: what.

Dick, grinning wider: He’s ours now.

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cymk8 · 28 days ago

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lady of sorrows

#bg3 #bg3 fanart #shadowheart #baldur's gate 3 #i actually started this at the end of the year but got so busy i couldnt finish until now #first art of the year and predictably...shart #this is the official chas benchmark lets see how far i can go this year!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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daincrediblegg · 1 year ago

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OK THIS IS NOT A FUCKING DRILL EVERYONE FUCKING REPEAT AFTER ME. THIS IS WHAT YOU WILL DO WHEN YOU WATCH MUPPET CHRISTMAS CAROL THIS YEAR:

You will navigate to the page on disney plus (and it has to be here. Unless someone has actually uploaded the REAL movie anywhere else you cannot get it elsewhere)

BUT YOU WILL NOT HIT PLAY. You won’t do it. Because it’s NOT THE REAL VERSION OF THE FILM AND DISNEY IS FUCKING LYING TO YOU AS IT ALWAYS DOES

You will scroll down HERE. To EXTRAS instead. You MUST GO HERE. This is non -negotiable

THEN YOU WILL SCROLL DOWN TO THE BOTTOM OF THE EXTRAS AND YOU WILL THEN HIT PLAY ON THIS BAD BOY: THE FULL LENGTH VERSION

And you will watch it. And you will thank me for having been so blind and led astray by that stupid fucking mouse. You’re welcome.

#I’m so mad everyone I’m sorry I’m going to make sure EVERYONE sees the proper version of mcc this year or die trying #literally this song is so important to the narrative and the film is so fucking hollow without it #if you grew up with disney’s bullshit version and thought it was good WAIT UNTIL YOU SEE THIS SHIT #please. please watch the REAL version of this film. it means a lot to me ok #the muppet christmas carol #for the love of god please people

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lucifers-simp · 2 months ago

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Well, that was fun but now it's time to put him back in the freezer

#until next year #ace attorney #miles edgeworth #narumitsu #phoenix wright #wrightworth #phoenix wright ace attorney #almost christmas #aa #aa1 #dl 6 #manfred von karma #gregory edgeworth #almost christmas means it wasn't christmas #christmas

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spacerockband · 2 months ago

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Quetzalcoatlus! poised to spear her prey!

#THIS TOOK ME OVER A YEAR TO FINSIH PLEASE HYPE HER UP #ceramic #ceramic sculpture #quetzalcoatlus #pterosaurs #if i tag this under dinos will the real paleoartists get mad at me… whatever #dinosaurs #dinosaur #pterosaur #ceramics #azhdarchid #stoneware #art tag #edited the colors a touch but they are QUITE vibrant in person. i’m overjoyed #i should clarify that it only took over a year bc she sat on my shelf dauntingly and gathering dust bc i had no idea how i wanted to glaze #oh AND because i broke her foot and had no idea i could use bisque fix on it until months later and then finally repaired it #wait did i break the foot or someone else. i think whoever unloaded it broke it #anyway not important anymore it’s fixed

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artbyblastweave · 4 months ago

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My father's funeral was yesterday. There are a lot of ways that I could attempt to eulogize him, but for the sake of expediency I'm going to go with an incident, towards the tail end of the Obama administration, where I was sitting in the living room reading, and he charges in in a big huff, says, "Look at what he sent me! Can you believe this guy?" and hands me this:

#I got his permission to post this to tumblr years ago but couldn't find it until I was going through old files looking for photos #shitpost #personal

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choodraws · 5 months ago

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gossip

twitter | ig | inprnt | patreon | store

#oldie from patreon #drew the girls a year ago in a blank void #didnt know what to do w it until i pulled it out of the vault a few days ago #some things need to marinate for a long time i guess

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foolsocracy · 9 months ago

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identity reveals are always fun

#batcave search history that night: friend has no name. atlantis naming conventions. atlantian names. r there birth certificates in atlantis #theyre so fun to draw guys im sick with it #also: everyone thinking 'But his name is Garth'#I know that and YOU know that but he doesn't until like..... a few years later. canonically #Unnamed Youth 'Aqualad' No Last Name #and arthur does call him both minnow and tadpole so wally n dick r both right in their own ways #and for ppl who really dont know. garth was abandoned as an infant and didnt hang w anyone until arthur took him in lol. what a life #and arthur girl...... was aqualad the best and only u could do #teen titans #fab five #donna troy #wally west #dick grayson #garth of shayeris #roy harper #dc #dc comics #my art #everyone hangin by the salt water pool so garth can hang w them :]

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beebfreeb · 9 months ago

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Louisiana Meshi!!!! Thistle will be at the crawfish boil.

#dungeon meshi #beebfreeb art tag #louisiana meshi #Hello people checking this tag #I used to live in Louisiana until like a year ago I grew up there #and many of my friends still live there #anyway YES there ARE public school uniforms they're statewide #If you haven't seen the addition go look at it #anyway I don't actually post much DM fanart I love DM but I am a sicko first and a fanartist maybe 5th or 6th #OCS FOR LIFEEEE

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homkamiro · 4 months ago

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Heavy language

#ahh yess...french and russian speaker solidarity #good luck to all of you who pass russian literature exam this year and have to read the whole war and peace page by page #we didn't even read it in my school. or teacher recapped it to us each lesson until we cheated on our tests lmao #team fortress 2 #tf2 #team fortress 2 fanart #tf2 fanart #tf2 spy #tf2 heavy #minor soldier beating scout's ass in the background if you squint your eyes

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pangur-and-grim · 5 months ago

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look at that transformation! well done, Belphie, you’ve defeated death!

#Belphegor #if it were a few years ago there wouldn’t have been anything to do #I would’ve had to watch him continue to bloat until he drowned in his own fluids #but now he gets to be a kitten! now he gets to live!#he’ll grow up and get fluffy and be with me for twenty years #he’ll get to be an old geezer with arthritis!#so many bad things happening every day but for once we get a solid win

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wonkyjaw · 5 months ago

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Quilt update. This is split somewhere in the blues and I have to sew that together and then I have to add one more yellow row to the top. Then the quilt top is finally, finally done.

#dear god this has been a journey #I started buying material and making hexagons out of circles last July so it’s been a year and some change #it’ll be over a year and a half by the time I’m finished probably because I’m spending October writing #so I’m waiting until November to find the time and space to actually quilt this thing #and im doing that entirely by hand too #I may bind it with my sewing machine though because holy hell #my quilt #quilt progress

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