#until i can get a job and pay someone
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Truly I have the upmost respect for people who have an idea for something and can stick with it, because my brain is always on a loop of *thinking about story stuff* *thinking about DIFFERENT story stuff* *thinking about DIFFERENT story stuff* *thinking about DIFFERENT story stuff* *thinking about DIFFERENT story stuff*
#like on the bright side#less depresso has got my brain back in creative mode#which is super nice#god knows if i could pick something to work on though#finish some of my short stories probably#check and see if any of those rpgmaker assets i wanted#are still on sale#none of my rpgmaker ideas are feasible#until i can get a job and pay someone#properly for the art#so in the meantime ill just rotate them in my head#see if i cant find the old work docs for them#anyways i moved back home which was a dent to my pride#but my mental health has been steadily improving#so theres that
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Have another concerning issue and now we NEED an electrician to come check on things.
I don't even have a credit card. We don't own the house so no loans, and assistance is not available through charitable orgs, and it is dad's second house technically, so he isn't able to access aid either. I live on under $1500 a month. There is no room for this.
I can maybe pay for a service call to come evaluate what is wrong. That's about it.
I'm so tired of this forced poverty shit. I can't save for anything. I'm not supposed to take charity even though there's no living on what I get and they know it. I can't get fucking married. But like a goddamn feral cat I also can't live without the trash they throw me.
If I die, dump half my corpse in front of the Social Security office and half in front of the SNAP office.
#oven and dishwasher and second bathroom are already not working#can't afford rent anywhere#i could pay maybe $300/month if I begged for help every month#but good luck getting a lease when your job is disabled and crowdfunding#this isn't livable#starting to worry it might not be survivable long-term#guess I ignore it until i can get someone to come look
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god artists really do just pass around the same $20 bill cause dude over half my clients are other artists 😭 and usually they're the ones that tip well!! i just wish i could afford to also commission other artists and buy stuff from their shops!
#as soon as i get my grants/scholarships im gonna buy some shit from artists i like#i gotta get some things for my wall cause i live in an empty white box#im going to a zine fest soon too so im excited to talk to local artists!!#gonna splurge on 1 big poster or something#i hope someone's selling sculpted magnets or other unique decorations#i gotta make a list of ppl i wanna buy from#idk if I'll commission anyone tho cause that's a whole other deal and more expensive#idk what i would commission#it'd have to be something from an artist who can draw that thing wayyyy better than i ever could#enough to justify me spending over $50-100 cause you know im not gonna pay pennies even if they're undercharging#i swear if i had a regular job id spend money on art every month#genuinely i think my ideal achievable life rn is working a head empty office job 30 hrs a week and doing art the rest of the time#building streams of casual income until i have enough to pivot to full-time art again MAYBE#but from what ive heard from post college full time artists... that shits hard and confusing and stressful...#these tags rly lost the plot huh...#just rambling#not art
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Almost 3 in the am and I’m sitting in front of a magnifying mirror plucking my armpit hair cheers
#diary#it’s just so satisfying I can’t stop#I really need to quit shaving but every time I try to learn how to wax I get so frustrated#I’ll have to wait until I have a job so I can pay someone to do it :/.
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well that was a shortlived good feeling about my job
#maybe i should just become unemployed. maybe i should just suffer!#recap of todays further events .#that supervisor? who i kinda didnt already like but now absolutely hate?#she came down to confirm that i wasnt leaving. okay . and then she fucking tells me#oh we're going to get another person to help out from this other company. we were going to do that bc we thought you were leaving#but she thinks that even if im staying there should be another person on this floor. bc apparently more has to be done#and there are 'constant complaints' abt this floor . which doesnt make sense to me bc there shouldnt be#and so we're waiting to see what the manager decides but hes on fucking vacation and wont get back until. next week??#she said she was gonna email him and like right after she left i emailed and texted him explaining everything#and trying to very nicely say hey what the fuck are you doing you don't need to hire anyone else#and if im doing a bad job fucking tell me so i can do it better. bitch#and she had the nerve to fucking tell me when she was talking to me#that i wont find an easier job than this one#well if its so fucking easy why are we hiring someone else#by the way getting that extra person from this other company doesnt cost them anything which is why theyre doing it i think#which is making me not feel good abt my own future lmao. like why would they keep paying me when they can get someone for free#and she was saying all this stuff like oh you have it so good here we dont write you up i do all this stuff to help you like . ok#i didnt ask you to come downstairs w the coffee order and if you wanted me to i would come up . god#but the thing of me not being able to find a better job like wow! what if i killed you. for saying that to my face#and she talks abt how shes been w the company 20 years ok and that doesnt give you an excuse to treat me like a child. jesus#anyway im very pissed off and not enjoying my work situation lol. i dont wanna do this anymore#but looking at other jobs im so unemployable. sigh
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I've never heard of emts working only at events? What's that like for you if you don't mind my asking?
Yeah, there are ambulance companies that staff certain events, but there's some event specific companies out there lmao. For me specifically, it's almost entirely college events, whether it's happening on a campus or not. It's not great, usually pretty boring, but it's better than being on an ambulance or in a hospital. We do get actual emergencies sometimes, but usually it's just getting drunk people to the tent or giving out water and bandaids lmao. Again, boring as fuck, but I chose this over working on a 911 rig, so that's on me 😔 if I'm being so real tho, other than my coworkers, the best part of the job is the food lmaoooo it's so good and all the food trucks/food booths give discounts or free food to us depending on the location and event. And there's almost always a ton of downtime, so I basically just get paid to sit there and vibe for the most part
#not snz#when i say i love my job i mean i love very specific parts of it lmao#idk if I've said it here before or not and this is gonna sound so bad coming from someone working in healthcare#but i don't like patients lmao#i love the book stuff and i love everything in theory and i know how everything works and I'm very enthusiastic about it#but man do i not like patients ahskaksk#there are exceptions obviously but those are few and far between#it's why i love being an emt at my fire station bc we don't reslond to medical calls#like I've done medical calls there for the public but very rarely bc people either approach us or we stumble upon them#so i really only do my emt things on the people i know and i love that#i love my coworkers so I'm always happy to make sure they're okay and help them out when they're not#but i feel nothing for the public and i didn't realize i genuinely couldn't care less about them until i started doing my clinicals#it's just awkward and I'm not invested in them i just like figuring out what's wrong with them and interact with them as little as possible#again there are exceptions and i do like some of the patients but generally I'm just trying to hand them off asap#so yeah i do like working events bc the alternative is being confined to a tiny box or trapped in a hospital#i like being outside and being able to walk around the place and do things if i want to#and obviously i adore my partner#and even on the rare occasions i work with someone else all day i love my other coworkers too#and i mean yeah this might be more boring than working on an emergency rig However#it pays so much better#like why do y'all think my medic partner works there lmao he's actually good with patients and prefers the ambulance#but the pay in the field is shit so he gets paid way more working events than he would at the three letter company#insane actually that he makes over ten dollars more an hour working chill events than he would being overworked on a rig#anyway i digress#I'm looking into pathology assistant school rn bc there's like no patient interaction there but i still get to be nosy#so that's perfect for me lmao#everyone keeps saying i missed my calling as a vet tho like i don't cry when a dog dies in a movie lmao i wouldn't survive#working with animals would be amazing but the only thing that really gets you money is being a vet#so that can be a hobby
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anyways sry its not srs eventually ill get it together . and be a person again. one day
#its just like atm everything that i need is like . not possible. which is oartially my brain being like We have to do this before we this#which sometimes isnt true but sometimes is#like i cant get medicated again or back seeing a psych or back on t until i get a job again#but i cant get a job again utnil i get my ged <- partially untrue but ged would make it a lot easier#but i cant get my ged until i have a job bc it costs money <- if i asked my parents they would probably help me If they had money 2 spare#since like. yk. they want ne to be able to work again so i have money again and ill be another source of income and they care abt me also .#affirmations . ppl donot just see me as a piggy bank they do see me as a person im not judt someone to squeeze money out of thats not how#ppl view me and its fine its fine its fine its fine . it feels so stupid being scared abt that i feel like a rich person whos like She only#likes me for my money 😭 like stfuuu annoying ass. i just ummmm. have a massive fear of debt and like. ppl demanding money from me#unexpectedly or expecting i am going to give them money. not in like a Ohhh fucking ppl want me to donate not it at all im happy to donate#but in like. god this is dumb. eveeytime i got birthday or christmas money as a kid i had to give it to my parents so they could buy food or#gas or whatever. and it never got paid bsck and it felt like shit. but i couldnt ever say no bc then itd be My fault we didnt have food that#week . yk. my first paycheck i had to give it all to my mom for groceries and we got in a fight in the store bc she was like Ok im gonna go#buy pop and my dumbass got upset abt it bc like. my mom told me itd be Necessities nd like. yk. wtvr. it was fucking stupid my entire family#r caffeine addicts so pop is a necessity i was just. rly upset and it felt like my parents saw my money as just. theirs but they had to ask#abt it so i wouldnt get pissy. yk. and they ask me for money a lot usually for food and i dont mind but it like. idk im rly paranoid abt#being a provider and ive got a Lot of guilt abt like. anytime we dont have enough food it feels like my fault bc it was my fault when i wasa#kid if i didnt give up my christmas money for pizza. or whatever. idk its so dramatic like i didnt need the money i was 8 it was selfish of#me to wanna buy fucking. toys or whatever that wasnt more important than My parents being able to get to work or my siblings being able to#fucking. literally eat. or paying bills. like its selfish that im like wahhh wahhh but i wanted to buy vibeo game wif my bday money i#shouldve judt been fucking grateful i was able to help my family. wtvr. I hate connor. wtvr#n then the shit with ugh last year like. yk. and stuff. and then the them stealing 1000 from me not getting into it b4 i get mad. idk.#and im just lazy now i need to get a job again but all the shit like. as i was saying earlier b4 i started whining. idk. i should be happy#that i get to help w bills and stuff that was my dream as a kid#like ever since i was 5 when i was fantasizing abt my future i was like Im gonna marry a prince and then ill be able to afford to pay all of#my families bills and my parents and siblings will be able to go to college and be happy and maybe never have to work bc ill be able to#handle it and ive always like. yk. when i was a dumbass kid i was like Ill go to college so i can get a good job and be useful. of course i#cant ever go to college bc im fucking. useless. and itd just be another burden on my family if i was in debt bc i couldnt help them as much#if i had debt and itd be selfish. and it doesnt matter bc im too stupid to go to college anyway. idk. i wish i could just fix everything#it just feels awful rn im literally just a drain and my family doesnt say it to me yk like. ik theyre happy imback i think they are
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#how is it that i can get only like 6hrs of sleep. go for an hr run up a mountain and still b wired#like ??? make it make sense??? im not even a lil tired. im considering going up thr mountain again#how does my body do this? im not even euphoric. i just habe too much energy#i just wanna smash things with a baseball bat. its so weird. i guess its not really an issue. i just dont understand it which bothers me#its either a mood thing or the hyper disorder :-/ but like idk how i havent noticed it before#like have i always been like that? i have evidence going back to 2019 but i didnt actually notice it until the last year for real#...i guess there is maybe a reason i didnt have so much energy before this but ya kno#whatever. i can try to find a therapist in like 10 days or something. so ill try to figure it out lol#idk im just vibing bc im sorta unemployed rn. i mean ive been hired as a TA but dont meet for that until thurs but im not at my research#assistant job anymore as of Friday. so i can do whatever tf i want. except im still working on my data 🙃 bc im fucked up like that#hopefully the energy lasts. or maybe not bc idk how i would fucking sit in an office at a desk like this#jesus. im like: me having adhd is impossible. but also me: having to do 3 things at once to pay attention and fucking dancing while i liste#bc i cant sit still. listen. i wont believe it until someone diagnoses me. but it wouldn't not make sense#ugh. i wanna run up the mountain again. but last time i was running twice a day to get rid of energy i fucked up my leg and its still#fucked up. but like not enough thst it hurts to walk so i still run on it. maybe ill go see a doctor once my new insurance kicks in lmao#oh Jesus my brain. maybe im just happy to havr all my insurance bullshit cleared up. i guess thats a bonus to living in like libertari4n#land. less regulations than my last state in terms of car insurance lmao#or maybe im nervous abt thr start of the semester. its gonna b a fucking wild ride lol#unrelated
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Honey, this might be very rude. But like what is your job. I want to save you from the that hell hole bro.
Please do not misunderstand nor feel pressured to answer.
I just hope it gets better.
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
i'm an office manager which means that i'm responsible for all the paperwork (all invoices go through me), calls and emails. and i act like an assistant to basically everyone in our office. including shit like booking flights and hotels and taking care of everyone's cars and insurances etc. buying office supplies, taking care of how our office looks, making tea & coffee for guests, booking rooms, making sure our management signs the papers on time etc. etc. etc.
doesn't sound that bad but the 'acting like an assistant' is tricky. because i get like 20 daily requests from people to take care of something asap. like, paying a fine, calling some place to ask about something, scheduling a meeting, making changes in booking, registering a car etc.
now it's extra stressful bc i'm organizing a christmas party for 120+ people and it's not easy when you need to book hotels for 30 people, book a restaurant, decide on a menu, confirm attendance etc. and your guests are dickheads who don't care if you have to change their reservation 4 times in 3 days.
#and there is no one who can replace me when it's needed. like when i took a week off it took me another 2 weeks to catch up with work#because some things are easy but it would take weeks of training to thoroughly prepare someone to do my job#and no one has time for this because they have their own jobs and duties#but despite this my coworkers help me as much as they can :') and they really support me#there's only one department full of shitheads and 90% of my problems originate there lmao most of the company hates them#tbh most of my problems would be solved if they just hired another person and split the work between us but#it's always been one person so 🤡#and sometimes it gets really calm and i don't have anything to do for a few hours. it's been months since something like that happened but#it happened a few times in the past lol#answered#i really can't quit this job because it pays well (i mean for a person with no degree). and out of obligation.#i need to finish my degree because now there's no way i would find something that could pay my rent 😭#but i promised myself i won't stay here for longer than 2 years unless they offer me a different position#but until then you have to listen to my complaining every day agkdgjdfj sorry
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i'm so grindset poisoned it is genuinely insane. i was justifying not paying for video games in 2011 (age 10) to my siblings by saying we should only spend money on non-necessities if it would bring us more money in the future. what's wrong with me
#red rambles#get me out of here#this brought to you by: every time i see someone i know with discord nitro#paying for discord nitro would probably kill me.#oh. right. Um. you can see that i had a job at age 5 really really really really clearly#possibly unreleased red lore: i was a child actor until i was 12 and got braces?#people stopped hiring me after htat
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The worst thing about my brain being an autopilot grammar nazi is that every single time I see people misuse “it’s” and “its” as well as apostrophe placements is that I don’t want to be rude and correct people... but my brain still is like UGH THIS IS THE WORST.
“It’s” and “Its” are more just my brain going weeo weeo on me when that’s a more understandable one bc “its” is literally the exception to a rule (because “it’s” actually means “it is”, so to avoid it being used for two meanings the apostrophe is removed for ownership cases), but when I see apostrophes before an S for plural wording and I know they speak English properly I’m just like. ugh. damn. bruh. please. go back to school.
Less severe cases of incorrect apostrophe use tends to be like, when people are playing Heroes and have duplicates of units and are like “my Ike’s” instead of “my Ikes”, because I think people are trying to... make it more clear that it’s referring to more than one? I think? Maybe? Or they literally just don’t realize it’s incorrect grammar, idk lol. Still can’t get past my weeo weeo autopilot brain though sadly.
LIKE. IT’S NOT ANYONE’S FAULT THAT MY BRAIN IS WEEO WEEO, IT JUST IS.
Which speaking of Heroes, FE in general seems to have its script in every single game ever coded to always use apostrophes for ownership cases even when the word ends in S, so don’t worry folks. IntSys isn’t getting off scot free from my brain either LOL. No amount of “princess’s” is ever gonna fly with my weeo weeo brain.
this has been a psa
mainly a psa of my brain weeo weeos
#DCB Comments#but the absolute worst offenders are people who overuse apostrophes and like#don't know how to write the plural of a word. today I saw someone write horse's to indicate more than one more horse#and I think the darkest depths of my soul finally cracked at the sight shjfgjhgs#this wasn't someone who speaks in broken English either or anything. they know how to speak the whole language just fine#also the other worst thing about my grammar brain is that I could absolutely get a job teaching English based on my knowledge alone#but I don't have an uwu master's degree uwu so getting teaching jobs even as freelance work is basically impossible#the world decides your worth based on how much you were willing to pay an institution for a certificate#and doesn't base you on your actual worth or knowledge so yeah that's great#can't wait until we're in an anime or video game where society's young decides that's bullshit and we're totally over it and rebel sjkfghju#also you know how you see those posts of ppl being like forget what you learned in school? yeah no don't do that with grammar#to an extent it's one thing (the really stupid ''rules'' like don't start a sentence with x word) and some of it was over the top#but there ARE actually legit reasons for some of those grammar rules; it's just that schools fail to teach them properly#I was extremely lucky to have very amazing English teachers for the most part ngl bc most schools don't teach even basic shit well#at least in my country. even in my school the stuff they taught was shit lol I just got very lucky to have great English teachers#but like for instance run on sentences are usually seen as an issue in writing because people lose their understanding of the sentence#if the sentence goes on too long with too many thoughts you'll probably forget what it was even about in the first place#if it's a WRITING style like a book or a fanfic or whatever it can make sense in some cases you just have to be thoughtful abt it!#but rly like I see people who can't even write basic English grammar who can speak it fluently and I'm like#what the fuck are these schools doing??? bc I can tell you what they're NOT doing e.e#this isn't limited to gen z btw I see ppl around my age who do this stuff with grammar too so... yikes#in fact I see people OLDER than my generation doing it too like... my own mom lmao#I'M SORRY I JUST HAD TO GET THIS OUT IT'S BEEN EATING AWAY MY EXISTENCE FOR MANY YEARS
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*drowning in research*
my little dream is starting to slowly become a reality. it's only been a week, but this is the longest I've ever stuck with a job idea that wasn't writing related. so it's starting to feel real and scary. but exciting? just wish life would stop, well, life-ing so I could focus more on this and less on worrying about the other stuff
#i don't know where to begin with the creating the things and buying the supplies or any of that#but research? i can do that#learning the general steps to starting an online business? i can do that#might need someone to sit me down when the time comes to start actually do stuff and remind me I can also handle that#but im not rushing this process or myself#im already overwhelmed and afraid I'll shut down and give up so I need to pace myself#there is only so much research and planning I can do before I need to start formulating tho haha#but real life stuff needs to happen first before I can start buying supplies and whatnots anyway#leena keeps track#gonna be my tag for all the little rambles I probably end up needing to get out during this process#vague on purpose until i actually have shit figured out and know for 100% sure I'm doing this#when I thought I would quit my current job it wasn't at all to do anything like this but this feels right#even if it means sticking with this job for a bit longer while I prepare for the next adventure#okay. enough rambles I need to actually work the job that currently pays my bills 😂
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was just told I'm only delaying the inevitable (covid infection) by being willing to work long hours for pennies online instead of working in-person retail for minimum wage bc it would pay more
not killing myself is also functionally delaying the inevitable (death) but there is value in that, isn't there? fuck.
#whatever shit tier work I'm gonna be doing is literally just to cover basic security needs until i can do something better#which will take months to set up and get rolling sure ok but i don't really have months now#if i know i have x income guaranteed in y time then i can breathe a little and stop panicking abt that at least#yes more money immediately would be helpful for everyone obviously#but I will accept lessened risk of myself and/or someone i care abt losing their relative health or dying horribly as a job perk.#if at that point i am paying for the relative peace of mind that i've done all i can: fine. you'll get money either way.#stirring up trouble
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pleased that my new workplace passed a test i have called: can i take off on this day I was scheduled to work?
answer was yes, which sounds like “of course they would say yes that day is like 2 weeks out” but the thing is, it was not immediately followed by “as long as you can find someone to cover your shift.”
however, this day IS part of the weekly shift I agreed to cover during the holiday season, so it is NOT part of my normal shift schedule, and technically qualifies as an extra day. so...this is just, like, test part 1. still happy my workplace passed, though
#work stuff#i am a little paranoid because i used to work in a restaurant so u can imagine how understanding they were about time off#which was not at all#my call center job was a bit better because they gave me a set number of sick days and were like 'do not be sick more than this'#but like i do get sick more than 3 days a year i am sorry but i do not have the immune system of a god#if there are ppl out there who do not get sick more than 3 days a year i do not believe you are real#for real tho whoever designed my immune system did not know what they were doing#but yeah so far i am happy with my new job so i kind of have this feeling like it's too good to be true?#like i am looking for the catch but i also don't want to find it#normally the biggest 'oh no' is 'i have to deal with customers'#and then there are a bunch of smaller rib jabs and shin kicks to follow up the big customer gut punch#but this job...no customers#sometimes one wanders down into the basement and peers wide-eyed into the machine floor like a startled deer#but i do not need to talk to them or acknowledge them in any way we all just bustle around doing our jobs like nice little worker bees#until someone takes pity and scuttles off to inform the supervisor that a real life person wandered down into our domain#and they need someone to lead them on shaky legs back into the light#but yeah the pay is good by my standards#the number of hours i work a week on my normal schedule is good#they asked me to work an extra shift and cover some scattered days for ppl who were sick or had appointments#but i felt like i could easily say no to all those#and i did say no to a few days w/no issue#partly as a test but also if i was busy that day#so yeah...no problems with the job so i am like 'where is it?! where is the problem?!'#hopefully a problem will just not manifest and my gut will accept that in time
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No because my sense of direction is so bad I got lost in a small village school today
#they even gave a tour beforehand but i was apparently not paying attention because when i had to leave the classroom i was helping out in#and go to the meeting room to read to the kids i just got So lost#i was openly wandering. i nearly burst into a random classroom to be like ‘girl help’ but i could see that the teacher had enough#on her plate already#so i just kept going back and forth and eventually i had to go through the hall where about 30 kids were having their music lesson#(immediate big headache) and then i got to the meeting room only to discover that the kids i was there to read to had not yet arrived#because they were meeting santa (read: jeff)#i literally should’ve just stayed put until someone came to get me#so then afterwards the lady was like ‘can you find your own way back to [classroom]?’ and i was like ‘i’ll be real with you chief.#probably not’ and she was like ‘ah yeah i’ll take you through; this place is a bit of a maze’ and i was like ‘no honestly it’s me. i could#get lost in a barrel’ i don’t think she knew what to say to this#and Then i was supposed to have a job interview in the meeting room 40 minutes after that and i was really hoping they’d come get me#but they just. didn’t. i waited until 5 minutes after i was supposed to be there and bid goodbye to the kid i was helping with his colouring#and set off. this time i knew to walk through the hall so that was good#but leaving i got really confused because i was like how.. do i leave this place#like they showed me out the door but i couldn’t immediately see the gate at the end of the path so i was like ‘is this a fucking dead end’#i tried to come back and go through a fence i couldn’t have gone through. i definitely looked incompetent#if anyone was watching.. oh god. but i did find the gate! it wasn’t a dead end. i thought they’d just pushed me out and left me alone to die#worst part was THERE WAS FUCKING FOUR INCHES OF SNOW ON THE GROUND. literally the footprints should’ve clued me in#but i didn’t know if i was coming to a locked gate. school security is wild sometimes#anyway i didn’t get the job. i don’t think it was due to my bad sense of direction; however i also don’t think that helped#it has now been 0 days since i last got lost somewhere#personal
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eating a girl out for the first time? as someone with a couple of decades' experience (i started young, ok?), can i offer some advice?
take your time. your aim isn't to make her come as fast as possible, it's to make sure she enjoys every moment. slow down, revel in the process of finding out what she likes.
tell her how beautiful she is, how tempting her cunt looks, how intoxicating it smells, how sweet she tastes. she might be feeling vulnerable, especially if she's inexperienced too - it's your job to make her feel safe and adored.
enjoy the journey - i know you just want to feel your tongue on her clit NOW, but exploring her thighs, working your way slowly to her folds, trailing all the way up her cunt, drinking her juices, letting her feel your breath before she feels your touch...it'll be worth it. for both of you.
learn to read her body with all of your senses. she might be vocal but she might prefer to bite her lip or enjoy being gagged. you don't need to hear her words to know what to do. you'll feel her muscles twitch and relax - learn what it means when she lifts her hips, squirms or sinks into you. she might taste and smell differently when she is close to coming for you. pay close attention to her clit - if you're lucky and you've done a particularly good job, you might see it twitch as she recovers from the perfect orgasm. enjoy it.
you can be vocal though. moan into her. use every sensation you can. light flicks to determined, long, slow licks. blow gently on her wetness. how does she react to your lip piercing? your teeth?
build and add to the experience until she's completely overwhelmed. play with her nipples. run your nails over her skin. lift her legs and spank her.
chances are, she'll get to the point where she really needs you to fuck her. slip your tongue all the way down and inside her. if you can't breathe, you're doing it right. that means you probably won't be able to keep it up for hours, so save this move for when she's right on the edge and you're ready to let her tip over.
if you're especially lucky and she's a squirter, you will get absolutely soaked. enjoy it. show her you're enjoying it. moan into her cunt; she'll come even harder.
if she needs to be fucked harder, slip your fingers inside her cunt and curl them up towards your tongue as it circles her clit. all of her most sensitive nerves will be between your tongue and your fingers. you'll be able to feel every tiny twitch inside her; it's the most beautiful place in the world to be.
when she can truly take no more, stay close to her as you drift away from her cunt. kiss your way up her tummy and her chest, let her taste herself on your lips as you hold her and let her ride out the aftershocks. trail your fingertips over her back. whisper in her ear. tell her everything you loved about eating her out.
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