#understanding the self through relation to the other

[reclaiming-antiradinclus-memes]

Found this meme that I thought would be worth doing because of how hilariously inaccurate it is.

This is Alyssa, and her pronouns are she/her. She is a transgender woman. She grew up in a conservative household and spent most of her life thinking transgender people were just “crazy”. It was later in life when she learned more about them that she realized she could actually be one, and she started referring to herself as a woman in safe environments. She still prefers masc clothing, and her issues with hand-eye coordination mean that she doesn’t shave. She doesn’t understand why she has to shave to be respected as a woman. She met Beth and Kennedy through her work mentoring the younger generation of trans people, and became informed about transids other than transgender. She enjoys getting coffee with them (and Samuel too) to expand her horizons.

This is Beth, and she uses she/her pronouns. She always felt like something was “wrong” about her, but was never able to put a finger on exactly what. She went through a short period of identifying as transgender, but decided she was happy as a woman and that that wasn’t the cause of her dysphoria. It was through conservative news websites mocking the concept (and self-identity in general), that she first learned that being “transracial” was a thing that some people were. She joined trace/diaracial spaces on social media, and discovered she was transblack. She’s still afraid to transition due to fears of being mocked and accused of racism, but now she has words for her experience. She met Kennedy, another transid person, in her college classes, and they became roommates. Later, she met Samuel and Alyssa, and befriended them as well.

This is Kennedy, and her pronouns are she/her. She always struggled fitting into human society due to her neurodivergence (ADHD and mild autism), but it was in high school that she began considering it was something more than that. She discovered the nonhuman community and related a lot to them. The final puzzle piece was sneaking off to the park to do quadrobics (after double, triple, and quadruple checking that no one she knew could be spying on her) and realized just how “correct” this all felt. She initially identified as a cat therian, but got fed up with the community’s constant claims of “we don’t actually think we’re animals” and switched to transspecies cat. Part of her wants to transition via tattoos and surgery, but she wants to become a doctor someday and fears her patients won’t take her seriously. Meeting Beth at college meant she finally had someone to relate to.

This is Samuel, Kennedy’s older brother, and he uses he/him pronouns. He is a devout Christian who goes to worship regularly. He opposes those who use Christianity as a cudgel for hate, and instead believes in Jesus’s message of love for all. He was the first person Kennedy told about her transspecies identity. He didn’t really understand one bit, but he respected and loved his sister regardless.

This got really long, but I was sick and didn’t have anything better to do. Hope you enjoy!

[better-than-sleeping]

A part of Richard's isolation from the group that I would like to put forward is this:

I truly do believe the group care for Richard as a friend, even when their relationships start to spiral out of control near the end. But that care isn't always present throughout their lives, the same way most people aren't constantly obsessing over their friend's feelings 24/7, and he cannot understand it.

It's not just the stuff you would typically think of that proves this to me, like the twins going out of their way to include him, companionable rambles with Bunny, making food with Francis. The most obvious instance of this is Richard being excluded from the Bacchanalia, and yes, this obviously sucks as someone trying so desperately to be included and a part of the group, but also makes so much sense from their perspective.

If Richard had been normal, he would have been so weirded out! This could be a convenient excuse, but it could just as easily be the group showing their own desires to be accepted by HIM, in a kind of reverse of roles that Richard naturally doesn't want to pick up on, because that would be seeing them human, and fallible, and SIMILAR TO HIMSELF. Unthinkable!

Something I've not seen discussed is the little aside when he first falls in with the group proper and relates that they had found him just as aloof as he had found them. Their inviting him to Francis's house was simply an urge to impress him, and I can't see any other way of reading it than that. If they had simply wanted to include him, but didn't care about how he saw them, they could have simply kept inviting him to their houses and out for lunch.

But, it's the moments that also double as little instances of ostracism that really interest me: Camilla saying Henry didn't want to do another pig ritual because he thought it would upset Richard, the group telling him they've already involved him enough and that he shouldn't participate in Bunny's murder. The general reading of this (that I've seen so far) seems to be that Henry did these things purposefully to keep Richard apart from the group, he didn't know him as well as the others, an unknown quantity, someone he didn't care for as much since he hadn't known him as long. But there's a lot of ambiguity there as well, and I think what makes things so compelling is that uncertainty. It could be purposeful, or unintentional, or some inextricable combination of the two.

(As an aside- ironically, I believe Henry may care about Richard the most out of anyone in the group. Helping him while he was sick, worried about seeing Richard drunk during the day, it's all rather sweet, and I don't believe it was entirely some machievellian scheme.)

However, I like to see the isolation as mostly, if not entirely unintentional, because that makes it so much more cutting to me. It's subtle. They don't put any special thought into doing it, they just…don't even think how these things could make him feel.

The worst part is, as far as I remember, Richard never fully engages with his feelings about this, but they are felt so much through the story and his actions within them. They are moments that sunk deep within his psyche like a stone that's dropped into water and swallowed immediately without a trace. It sits very still inside him, unmoveable.

His acceptance of these moments as they are happening to him is likely a result of his history of loneliness and being apart from others. There is nothing unusual to him about this, that it would require further thought from him within his narrative.

A large part of Richard's isolation is due to his glorification of the people he deems worthy, which continues even after he begins to see their flaws. Despite them, he still can't bear to see them torn down to his level, people he can relate to instead of glorify or look down upon. I think there is an element of self destruction to this, not wanting to understand so he has an excuse to punish himself for self perceived deficiencies.

It's very intriguing, this uncertainty of how much of Richard's isolation from the group is imagined, or perhaps even self imposed in a kind of feedback loop, where he feels pushed away and so pulls himself away from them, to anonymous parties with people he professes not to care about, takes pills and sleeps for days, to numb himself from the pain of their rejection.

And in the process, this feeling of isolation is enforced, becomes more a reality through the concrete evidence he has produced by himself. Maybe the group see his behaviour and think he needs space, they give it to him. He feels lonely, he says nothing. Because he would rather freeze to death than ask for help.

[amaryllis-sagitta]

Hi again, going through the different endings of DAV, I was pretty surprised to hear Solas being all like "I am a god!!" when Rook beats him in a fight. I know he has pride issues but that felt so OOC to me?? I was wondering if you had an opinion on it?

Hi, thanks for asking again!

There are 3 tiny (or not so tiny?) moments that I think push the envelope on Solas's characterization in a way that allows us to portray him as more genuinely sinister than the main line established in Trespasser, post-Trespasser media and most of DATV, which is the "Pathetic, stubborn man ridden with massive unprocessed guilt and shame, who can't make a choice without some catastrophic collateral for the life of him, and the unforeseen consequences of his choices repeatedly push him to double-cross people and have them do his dirty work".

One moment that had me thinking is the third memory of the rebellion - I mentioned earlier how Solas's pose and facial expressions make him unduly smug when Felassan calls out that they were supposed to do better than send out an army of spirits, appealing to their nature in seemingly good faith, when they were really a distraction doomed to fail. It shocked me because it seems to strike at one of Solas's core values. It's supposed to hurt more in relation to spirits because we know how much Solas despises wasting, destroying or twisting spirit purpose. And yet, in his confrontation with Felassan, he seemed content, smug even, about achieving victory against Elgar'nan and didn't show a trace of regret.

Another moment is the jab in the Fade that "at least you have Varric to talk to", again with a smug sense of satisfaction. Learning about this line took me by surprise because for all the disingenuity Solas is capable of, I never had him for someone who takes delight in such petty cruelty, especially when the matter is also personal to him to a degree. Varric's death should have hurt him by virtue of their mutual respect gained in DAI, so has the game underdelivered in representing this? Or are we really pushing a narrative that he never really changed his mind on non-elves, or chose not to acknowledge them as people, so Varric was just a disposable fool?

The third specific moment that shows Solas in a worse light is the moment you mentioned in the ask. Though, watching this scene, I feel we need to cite the full sentence:

Rook: [...] I am not alone, but you will be. The Veil needs to be tied to the life force of an elvhen god. And now it is, Dread Wolf. Solas: You sneer at me as though you understand. You are mortal! Compared to you, to your infinitesimal existence, I AM A GOD!"

This is a conditional state of an ending, when you decide to fight him and at least the companions in your party have reached the Hero status, which means they survive Solas's counterattacks, so in the end Rook doesn't stand against him alone, and does not end up in the Fade prison with Solas. This is where Solas is at his most desperate, I think, because when Rook remains alone in the Fight ending, it's a pyrrhic victory. Solas doesn't lash out then, because he isn't done with Rook. The context of "I am a god" is that Rook will soon perish while The Dread Wolf will prevail for centuries still, and no mortals can stop him in a way that matters.

But could it also be a trigger for his greatest fear: that there's a realistic chance he can very nastily die alone with his regrets and self-loathing? Because he does not say he is immortal - he never bound a dragon, so he can't take advantage of the Evanuris perk. Neither does he accept a definition of godhood. It's a matter of scale and comparison; in this final moment, he's looking for a way to belittle Rook and their team.

In fact, the "I am a god" in this context represents the extreme of the views he's held about mortals before - arguably, before joining Inquisition. Though I think that even then, he had trouble humanizing races other than elvhen. If his mind has really swayed throughout DAI, it feels barely half a step towards acknowledging that mortal elves, especially the Dalish, might have a point in their approach to history. Then, in Tevinter Nights, he says to Charter that the elves who survive the un-Veiling might find the "new" world better. Not really a win.

I believe a proper background for this is found in two conversations. First, when Rook keeps poking at Solas's plan to tear down the Veil and he stops eluding the question, Rook says "Spoken like a god". Solas's reply in this moment frankly sounds... too deflective. Like it's coming from someone who genuinely needs someone to constantly whisper "Remember you are but a mortal, Caesar" in his ear.

The second moment is when, after having the loud argument with Elgar'nan to get Rook out of a Fade pocket of despair, Solas admits Elgar'nan is who he feared becoming - callous, tyrannical and contemptuous. I guess Solas's worst moments are supposed to show how close he really could get, because the "I am a god" most definitely defines an ego trip that comes from a place of great insecurity.

If I were a hater looking for a hook to make an uncharitable argument that "He was amoral all along and his gentler side was a mask that just waited to slip", I'd start there.

[opal-kitty333]

So, I like Horror Sans, and being a nerd, I've been thinking about him a lot during my recovery with brain damage. A lot of people treat his wounds like brain damage, giving him memory problems, chronic headaches/migraines, speaking difficulties, fugue states, just issues collecting his thoughts. All understandable and reasonable symptoms, but there's something about just what truly horrific, completely life altering, brain damage to such an extent can do to a person that hasn't been explored very much. Yes, he doesn’t technically have a brain, but considering someone with head trauma like him would be in a comatose like start for weeks to a month, we can choke up him taking that hit like he did and being able to walk and talk to that. Plus, we can take inspiration from real injury and science and have wiggle room for it to not be 100% accurate. Anyway-

This is Phineas Gage.

It is one of the earliest extreme cases of brain damage where the patient survived while psychology as a scientific practice was getting on it's feet. If you've taken a psychology class, you've heard of him. He was a railroad worker foreman who had a rod blown through his skull in an accident, destroy most of his frontal lobe.

If you don’t know what the frontal lobe is it's where your ability to reason and make decisions, the ability to control your muscles voluntarily, and your ability to process knew information and recall old information. It's well known for being the part of your brain that inputs logic, the part gives you the ability to remember what happened last time you picked a fight with someone, so instead you choose to walk away despite how much your want to punch them for being a prick.

As I stated before, this man was a foreman, well known for keeping a level head, being responsible, and hard working. After the injury, that completely changed. Everyone agreed he was barely recognizable as himself. He was impulsive, prone to extreme mood swings, impatient, making massive plans only to almost immediately abandon them, and generally seemed to have no control over his desires or ability to distinguish between a want or a need.

Now, let's look at Horror.

I'd say it's safe to say his frontal lobe but also part of his parietal lobe would be utterly fucked. Your parietal lobe controls your ability to process sensory information (mostly touch) and to understand not only where you and your body is, but to process the world around you. You see a massive enough tent, some clowns running around, the right music, and your parietal lobe is what does the work to label that as a circus.

To have these two structures damaged, or the closest equivalent in a monster, would radically alter Sans' personality, his ability to move, his understanding of the context around him, and connect with others.

He'd become rather self centered on his own desires and beliefs, struggling to even have the patients let alone the want to give other people the time of day. His actions would be impulsive, made on his emotions in the present moment and with little concerns other than the immediate consequences. He'd be prone to loud outbursts, not just rage, but any other emotions like sadness or glee with little ability to realize how he's acting may be overblown or inappropriate. Not only could his ability to put his thoughts into words be a struggle, but his ability to say those words could be affected as well. He'd be very present focused, with pass relations or responsibility mattering little as he keeps marching to the beat of his own drum.

That is, if he could march. He'd not only struggle to know where his limbs are or what he's touching, but his sense of balance would be awful. He'd likely have a constant wobble, having to go slowly and potentially hold onto or lean on things if he wanted to move quickly. God forbid how much he'd bump into furniture or trip and struggle actually grab onto something to catch himself. It's entirely possible he'd have difficulty reading and writing or confusing his left and right regularly. He'd need more time to process a situation and could very easily misidentify what's actually going on could likely lead to him acting even more unpredictable as the world around him is so much more dangerous and he's struggling to fully understand what everyone is doing and trying to keep two steps ahead of everyone around him.

But here's the thing. The brain is also incredibly adaptable in ways your wouldn't believe. Phineas Gage slowly recovered over time. He died twelve years after the incident from epilepsy but over time he slowly regaining his social skills and general functionality. He picked up a job as a stage coach four years after the indecent even. He was never quite the same person he was before, but he wasn't doomed to be what he first was after the indecent.

Imagine what this kind of thing could mean for Sans. Not only would the betrayal cut deep enough and the world falling apart put him through trauma that would shred the soul, but people he trust literally damaged his ability to think logically and control his impulses. Of course he's going to lash out, focus on doing anything he can to survive with little respect for what anyone else thinks. Even forcing his brother to do things and refusing to listen to him unless given no other option. All while he thinks the biggest problems after the indecent is how much his head hurts, how his memory is shot, that it's harder or even down right painful to think, and how he's struggling to cling to his independence while never having the patience or resources to give himself the ability to heal. He doesn't even realize how much he's changed. If you point it out Sans would likely get defensive and aggressive, or brush it off as everyone underground being awful people out to eat each other alive.

But then he gets out to the surface. He gets stable food, a safe place to live. His brother is recovering and as the years pass his mind can finally start pulling itself together and healing, finally. Sans begins to regain his ability to think critically on his own actions and others, his emotional outburst and vindictive behavior start to wind down and fade. He's able to think and start sifting through all the shit he remembers.

The guilt of what he did, the people he hurt for no reason other than pettiness. The stupid decisions he made that hurt himself and/or Papyrus in the long run. All the hindsight he has now. Imagine how much he would bury those memories and thoughts. Justifying everything he could and insisting he had reasons, or that it's just how it was and that everyone was as awful and cruel he was. Or just accepting that what Undyne had done to him and the famine after had ruined him, broken and rotted all the good he had and left him vile and malicious. That he'll never have a chance to truly be who he was before.

[amischievouscat]

I was just scrolling through my dash and found a post that really made me think.

This is a vent type post so it's below the cut if you don't want to read that. Also spoilers for Helluva Boss.

It was criticizing people who like the stolitz ship because "stolas and blitz are abusers" and that immediately made the ship wrong.

First of all, it really made me pause and think about the media literacy of people who watch shows like Helluva or Hazbin but can't look deeper than the character's direct actions. Yes, they're both assholes. But there's far more to it than that. Both of them have been fundamentally changed and affected by the ways they were raised; Blitz is avoidant of love and affection because his dad used him for money and his mom died in a fire he was blamed for. His best friend and love interest shunned him for years over a misunderstanding and everyone he loved turned their backs on him, his own sister included. Whereas Stolas is a prince who was in a very abusive arranged marriage and has this idea of love that comes from operas and movies, a very over exaggerated "shout it from the rooftops" rose-tinted shades type of love that quite frankly is impossible in our world and the show's. His relationship was horrible and he escaped into the worlds of movies and songs, and this gave him an unrealistic view of love.

Second, acting like people can't be shitty in relationships and still love one another is ignorant. Personal vent below.

I have a long term boyfriend; and we recently had a very heated fight because we both wanted things from the other that we couldn't communicate clearly. We both said hurtful things that we didn't mean. It doesn't make us abusive; it makes us human. People aren't perfect.

I feel like this criticism struck a particular nerve for me because I myself relate a lot to Blitz. I was in an abusive relationship, and that kind of thing changes you in ways you can't really describe to other people. I became very codependent and reserved, and after the relationship finally ended I felt even more lost than when I was in it (similar to Blitz fighting for his "relationship" with Stolas back, despite knowing it's unhealthy) because I had become so used to the chaos that calm felt like a threat.

You can say hurtful things and not be an abuser. Stolas is absolutely completely non self aware and he said hurtful things to Blitz because of it. That doesn't make him this horrible caricature of an abuser. He literally doesn't know any other method of love. He doesn't understand how his actions affect Blitz because he's a damn prince. Of course he's going to be out of touch and self-important. It also doesn't make him innocent.

Neither of them are innocent. They were both assholes to one another. But that doesn't make them abusers. Good lord people

[mimble-sparklepudding]

Vegetable Symbolism OC Questions!

A little list of OC questions based on the symbolism of Vegetables in the interpretation of dreams. This is not intended to be an exhaustive list of all cultural or symbolic meanings, but rather just a small selection for entertainment, rather than educational, purposes. It may, however, encourage you to make a salad.

Carrot: Growth, Fertility, and New Beginnings.

Does your OC believe that someone needs to hit rock bottom - or at least suffer the full consequences of their poor choices - before they can be helped to make positive changes? Or would they spare no effort in trying to help a friend or family member they percieved as trapped in a cycle of negative behaviour?

Does your OC wish to have children of their own? Would they ever consider adoption? Or is it important to them that they have a birth child to carry on their lineage? If they do not want children then how do they respond to being asked about it?

At what age did your OC stop growing? Did they go through puberty notably earlier or later than their peers? Would they have quite liked to have grown a little more?

Are there any festivals or cultural traditions related to fertility in which your OC participates? If they have chosen not to continue these traditions then what was the reason? How do they feel about any fertility rites or practices they have encountered in other cultures?

Has your OC ever been involved in farming or agriculture? Or have they tilled the earth in a more modest setting? What is their view of food production in society? Is it something they understand and value? Or do they make little connection between the food they eat and the labour required to produce it?

Tomato: Nourishment, Vitality, and Love.

Does your OC seek out calorie-dense or highly nutritious foods to enhance their physical performance and survivability? Or is the taste or presentation of food as important (or more important) than its health-giving properties?

Does your OC find it easy to believe that they are loved? Or are they suspicious of ulterior motives? Perhaps they fear that once someone truly gets to know them then they will be repulsed or horrified? Or maybe they find it hard to imagine how anyone could not love them...

Is your OC generally seen by others as being healthy and fit? Or are they often sick or beset by mysterious aches and pains? Do they rather enjoy the attention that comes with being unwell? Or is it important to them that they are seen as strong and healthy?

Does your OC take care of their appearance? Do they apply beauty treatments or take potions or supplements to enhance their looks? Do they do this to appear alluring to others? Or purely for their own satisfaction? Are they entirely honest with themselves about this?

Does your OC enjoy preparing and cooking food for others? Is feeding other people a way they show love and nurture others? Or is making food something they avoid? Perhaps they tend to ensure they get the lion's share of any food they make, and grudgingly leave only the gristle and scraps for others?

Cucumber: Healing, Rejuvenation, and Self-Care.

Does your OC have any gift for healing? Was this always something they felt drawn towards? Or something that they adopted later in life? If they have no abilities in healing or medicine then is this something they regret? Or do they see healing as the province of weaklings and those who lack the gumption for combat?

Does your OC give much thought to looking after their own health? Are they careless with their own well-being? Do those around them encourage them to take better care of themselves? Or are they actually in need of others to push them into taking a few more risks - be they physical or emotional?

What makes your OC feel rejuvenated after a particulary difficult or exhausting time? A hot bath? A cold drink? A bout of particularly vigorous lovemaking? Or just a nice long sleep?

Does your OC take enough rest generally? Or do they push themselves hard despite being in need of time to recuperate? Do others notice this? Does anyone pass comment?

Does your OC feel energised by spending time with others? Do they struggle when alone for extended periods? Or do they find themselves depleted by too much social interaction and often find themselves in need of some time by themselves?

Onion: Hidden Truths, Repressed Emotions, and Deep Secrets.

What has been the greatest revelation that your OC has experienced? To what degree did this new knowledge upend their previous understanding of the world and their place within it?

Has your OC any secrets which they keep from others? Are these kept only from those outside their inner circle? Or are there some secrets to which none but they are privy?

Does your OC have some feelings that they push down deep within themselves? Perhaps feelings of resentment? Or pangs of grief? Or burning sexual desires? Or do their emotions constantly come bubbling to the surface regardless of any efforts they might make to suppress them?

Is your OC talented at extracting secrets from others? Do they do so through charm and persuasion? Or through intimidation and force? Do what end do they seek this hidden knowledge? Purely for personal gain? To better understand the world? Or out of sheer nosiness?

What is something that your OC generally keeps from others - even those to whom they are close? Is this due to shame? Embarrassment? Fear of rejection? Or something nastier and darker by far?

Lettuce: Emotional Balance and Inner Peace.

Is your OC generally even-tempered? Or are they quick to anger or easily brought to tears? Do others feel they need to "walk on eggshells" around them for fear they might fly into a great rage or collapse into a blubbering heap? If so, then are they themselves aware of this?

Does your OC evince a great calm and focus during times of crisis or disaster? Can they keep their head amidst the clamour and chaos of an emergency situation? Or are they easily thrown into a panicked state?

Has your OC ever got into a fit of laughter from which they struggled to recover? What was it that they found so funny? Is it a memory on which they look back fondly?

Does your OC ever deliberately wind themselves up by focussing on bad memories or bitter resentments? Do they do so in order to harness their anger that they might overcome a challenge? Or perhaps to aid them in combat? Or would such things only serve as a distraction from their work?

Does your OC practice any meditation techniques or cultural rituals designed to centre them and bring them calm? If so then where did they learn these approaches? If they do not practice such things then would they benefit from doing so?

[sweetlady555]

Unlocking the hidden power of Mars 12H:

Hi everyone! I apologize for not having been uploading as much but I’m back and writing about Mars 12H because it's so powerful and I rarely EVER see anyone talking about it. As I’ve decided to step fully into my power starting November 2024, I’ve recently realized something powerful about my energy that completely changed my perspective, I will be using Kim Kardashian as my example as she is a Mars 12H native :$

What Is Mars in the 12H? 🤔

Mars represents drive, action and motivation. The 12H is the house of the subconscious, hidden things, spirituality, behind the scenes, hidden strengths, the spiritual realm. When these two energies combine, they create an energy that works below the surface often in ways we aren't fully conscious of. 👁️

One thing you should know is Mars 12H natives makes moves in silence they don't need outside noise or your projections! You'll see how it's done just watch, you don't know need to know how, why or when they're going to do it, but just know they've been multiple steps ahead of you. Its like this divine calling thats always in your ear telling you which move shall be next and its such a strong force that its like if you don’t take action itll make you feel so……… wrong its like a itch. Usually Mars 12H natives do take the action and it leads to blessings I like to call them. Mars 12H natives do not feel the need to force anything, when the thought and feeling comes you do that shit! Mars 12H natives are always mysteriously led to exactly where they need to be.. this is likely why they get their rep for being so mysterious & secretive! Its imporant as a Mars 12H native to listen to your gut and trust that everything will work out as planned, and this doesn’t go for just Mars 12H natives it goes for everyone!

Let's use Kim Kardashian as a famous example on how Mars 12H manifests for the natives, as a Mars in 12H native I feel like I can relate to her ambition and I can understand her doings.

Kim Kardashain always knew she was going to be a star, if you have seen her videos of her younger self she states, "and you're all going to remember me as this beautiful little girl" For both Kim and people with Mars 12th house, the confidence and determination to become a star or successful often comes from a deep subconscious belief in their destiny. Even if they don't know the "how" or the "when," they just FEEL compelled to take action towards their dreams, sometimes in ways that seem hidden or almost effortless to others. In Kim's case, she didn't just fall into success, she actively pursued it through her work, image crafting, and seizing opportunities. Even before she became widely known, she had an innate sense of how to position herself and build her brand. This is the Mars 12H signature, an internal drive that doesn't always need external validation or explanations to succeed. Many people accuse Kim of "destiny swapping" with Paris Hilton but let's be so fo real right now.. Destiny swapping doesn't exist, and I feel like people just can't believe Kim rose above Paris Hilton which seemed so effortlessly, but not enough people credit her for her hard work and perseverance. People have accused her for being a reptellian too 😭 ? because I guess its that hard to understand hard work, dedication and logic actually does pay off! Kim has a vision and she's still actively working hard for her vision behind the scenes, and if its one thing we all know its that Kim will chase her bag regardless!

My experience with Mars in the 12H :

Growing up, I always knew I was going to be something special, I knew I was gonna be influential (I have 10H placements so this might manifest differently) Last year, I had rose to fame very quickly online through my image and the amount of people who were confused af how I did it was flattering not gonna lie! I would hear people tell me things like “did you sell your soul?” or “whats the method?” or “you only got it because you had this and this” . I was always in my own bubble online posting what I feel destined to do no matter what my ego said. I thought with my soul a lot of times even if it was shocking, so honestly I could see how people would accuse me of “selling my soul” or having a certain method to my influential social media fame. There is a lot of pain & passion behind my doings and I logically plan everything out so it kind of flatters me honestly! To me this just shows how Mars 12H natives are skilled in making something out of themselves coming from being a underdog to becoming someone highly admired.

The Energy Of A 12H Mars Native :

Mars in the 12H natives can have this strong powerful magnetic effect on others without them even realizing it but others will feel this on a subconcious level. They truly have a lot of appeal! Its almost like this hidden power or secret magentism that draws people in which could attract a lot of admirers, monitoring spirits, actual spirits even! 😭 The truth is though, Mars 12H natives do really have this strong inner power within them, they tend to be very confident in themselves and this energy reflects on the outside even through the screen. They have this aura around them that can’t be ignored. Mars 12H natives will often be seen as untouchable or enigmatic, just like Kim she knew how to use this energy to use this subtle allure to captivate her audience.

People with Mars 12H have this sexual energy that is more felt, not seen! This can make their presence intoxicating as others may sense their sexual energy without knowing where it’s coming from. Its almost hypnotic! Its a deeply rooted emotional and spiritual sexual energy often rooted in the subconcious. With Kim, she knew how to use this energy in her brand being percieved as seductive, powerful and confident, but it wasnt just about her body — it was about the way she carried herself and commanded attention without saying much.

Despite being more subtle, Mars in the 12H gives the individual an almost unconcious control over their sexual energy. Theres an innate understanding of how to play on emotions and create attraction often with very little effort. This creates an energy that is simultaneously passive and powerful and you can’t deny or ignore it either. Almost like being in the background but still being the force everyone notices.

There is a lot of fantasy and imagination that takes place with Mars 12H natives and how theyre percieved, natives with this placement tend to make others fantasize about them not just by how they look but how they make people feel! Their energy creates a sense of longing, almost like a dream or a fantasy that others want to live in. Kim Kardashian has been able to tap into this fantasy energy by cultivating an image of perfect beauty and luxury, which keeps her in a fantasy world that fans want to be apart of. This fantasy element is key to her sexual appeal, as it makes her seem unreachable and unattainable.

Mars 12H natives, if they aren’t aware of their power makes them a target for insecure people and spirits in the physical and spiritual realm. People will often notice this energy before you even do and project the most they can and throw as much dirt as they can on you because they’re afraid of your power! Its highly advised you take the precautions and make sure you are being careful in who you’re telling your business to, what things you might be opening in the physical and spiritual realm, who you let into your space, who you’re doing business with all of it! Dont let them take advantage of you!

I also had read that Mars 12H often repress their emotions or their anger and although it is that in some cases, Mars 12H natives just tend to strategically move instead of acting out on anger or resentment in the moment to avoid unnecessary conflict and to stay in power and their own peace. Its a silent strength many Mars 12H natives have where you don’t have to scream or shout to prove yourself, you can strategically wait for the right moment, then act with precision. This ability to stay focused and composed on long term goals is what makes Mars 12H natives have this quiet power behind them. People might not realize that this anger comes from a calculated, startegic place, its not random but it could be percieved as out of nowhere. The 12H is often linked to subconcious energies, hidden feelings and things that are not visible to others, so when Mars 12H natives express their anger it can come off as intense, mysterious or even uncontrollable to those around you. People may not fully understand why you do the things you do or whats going on beneath the surface so this often leads to people labeling your anger more extreme.

The Spirtual Realm

Mars in the 12H natives are often deeply connected to the spiritual realm, but they experience it in a unique way. This placement can give them a natural sensitivity to invisible forces or energies like I mentioned earlier a divine force! Whether that may be intuition, sprits or subconcious currents that influence their actions. Mars in the 12H is often described as “Behind the scenes” or operating in the background, which makes these individuals especially attuned to the unseen world—the spiritual, emotional and psychological realm.

Mars, the planet of action, aggression and energy, in the 12h amplifies the natives ability to tap into intuitive and spiritual currents. This placement suggests that instead of being overly action-oriented in a physical way, Mars energy often works in more subtle and intuitive forms. For these individuals, the battle often happens internally-in the subconscious, in dreams, or in their connection to the spirit world.

Mars in the 12th house people often experience a sense of being guided by invisible forces, and they can be highly receptive to messages or signs from the spirit realm. This doesn't always mean they consciously hear or see spirits, but rather that they might feel guided by an internal voice or experience moments of divine timing that feel too precise to be mere coincidence. They may also experience heightened sensitivity to energy, such as a feeling of being watched, sudden shifts in mood or vivid dreams. Its not a common occurrence to hear ringing in your ears when you’re picking and feeling up on certain energies with these natives!

Since Mars 12H is a powerful subtle energy this makes spirits from the spiritual realm more attracted to them, Mars 12H natives are very assertive and felt by these spirits hence why certain spirits like to latch onto them. Its not common either to see spirits, see things move suddenly and even a spirit taking control over your body when you’re asleep. It sounds scary but don’t let this make you afraid, I once fell into this when I was around 8 or 9 when I was sleeping and a spirit had woken me up in the middle of the night and made me literally slam my face into my headboard that made the principal think I was getting hurt at home, i was always targeted by this spirit. I was the only one who could speak to it and make them do certain things like move toys and such. I didnt realize at the time I was connecting with aggresive spirits 😅 and not God. Its highly important for Mars 12H natives to strongly protect themselves when they are asleep because when you are asleep the veil between the spiritual realm and physical realm is very thin!

Mars 12H natives embody this spirtual warrior archetype, they can feel a calling to fight or stand up for spiritual causes or to protect others, but they do this in a way that is not outwardly visible to others. Mars 12H natives might actively avoid conflict when it comes to spiritual warfare or protecting their energy and their peace. They may also engage in energy work, spiritual practices, or rituals in private to protect themselves from unwanted spiritual influence. This is often done subtly or privately, as they don't always like to broadcast their spiritual strength. Their Mars energy in the 12th house can make them exceptionally good at clearing negative energy, transmuting it, and defending themselves from energetic or spiritual attacks, but they may prefer to do so behind the scenes, where others don't see it.

Mars in the 12th house natives may also experience periods of isolation or retreat, where they feel the need to withdraw from the physical world to connect with the unseen world. These moments of solitude allow them to recharge spiritually, process subconscious material, and connect with higher realms of consciousness. During these times, they may feel a deep connection with their higher self or with the spiritual beings guiding them.

When it comes to spiritual practices, these individuals are likely to have a natural talent for healing or working with energy, whether it's through prayer, meditation, crystals, or other metaphysical practices. Mars in the 12th house helps them channel life force energy in a quiet, powerful way, almost like a spiritual warrior operating in the background, quietly shifting energy around them.

Its important to watch out as a Mars 12H native what you are putting your energy into as these things will manifest almost immediately. When you decide to shift your attention to other IMPORTANT things you will often notice your energy was literally the foundation for whatever negative thing that was happening. So be Aware! You know how powerful your energy is.

This was a long post but as a Mars 12H native, I rarely see any accurate or in depth posts of Mars 12H individuals, I had to really dig into my experiences to understand this was Mars 12H influence all along.. In my opinion, Mars 12H natives deserve so much more respect for what they do because a lot of it goes unseen and for multiple reasons lol. I havent wrote in a while but I was getting a huge urge calling to post about this. If any mars 12h individuals relate to any of these experiences please let me know because I’d love to hear from you! and please be careful 💟 may god protect your divine energy, space and you ☮️

[talonabraxas]

“Tantra is the science of transforming ordinary lovers into soul mates. And that is the grandeur of Tantra. It can transform the whole earth; it can transform each couple into soul mates.” — Rajneesh

Vajrasattva Yab-Yum Talon Abraxas

Yab Yum (father-mother) is the symbolic sexual relationship between the masculine and feminine visualized deity in Tibetan Buddhist iconography. Yab Yum symbolizes the union of method and wisdom.

Feminine Principle in Tantra

Feminine principle is the principle of wisdom. It is the most primordial essence of the universe. The wisdom mind is the self-existing reality. It is awareness that knows its own nature. Feminine principle is related strongly to jnana, or the insight that knows reality itself, the self-existing reality of all things.

It is also called the mother, as it gives birth to the Buddhas. Feminine principle is the liberating method. Through wisdom, the practitioner of this yoga is liberated from the stream of samsara.

The female deity is most frequently depicted with a kapala (skull cup) containing amrita in her left hand. In her right hand is typically a flower, symbolizing compassion, or a kartika (hook knife) symbolizing cutting through to innate purity of reality.

In Vajrayana Buddhism, the kapala, often held by deities like mahasiddhas and dakinis, symbolizes wisdom and knowledge. Practices involving the kapala include the melting of moon drops in the skull, creating a blissful sensation. The kapala is also a representation of lineage transmission during empowerments. Drinking blood from it, often associated with impurity, symbolizes non-discrimination and the yogi’s breakthrough into non-dualism. The dakini’s image, delighting in consuming blood, signifies a perfected yogi dwelling in non-duality, experiencing the union of emptiness and bliss— the highest enlightenment in Vajrayana Buddhism.

The kartika, with its distinctive crescent shape, is a ritual implement used in various Vajrayana practices. Its curved blade symbolizes the severance of attachment and delusion, cutting through the bonds that bind individuals to cyclic existence. In the context of the feminine principle, the kartika is often associated with the dakini, a mystical and enlightened feminine energy.

Dakinis, portrayed as fierce and compassionate, use the hook knife to cut through ignorance and ego, guiding practitioners towards spiritual awakening. The symbology of the kartika emphasizes the transformative power of the feminine principle in Tibetan Buddhism, depicting the dakini’s ability to remove obstacles, liberate beings, and reveal the path to enlightenment through the compassionate act of severing attachments.

Masculine Principle in Tantra

Masculine principle is upayas or skillful means. They are the manifestation of the Mahayana principle of compassion. When compassion enters the Vajrayana, it becomes skillful means. This is the method to liberate other beings, to wake them up to reality, to help them understand the trap of samsara and the path to liberation.

In Tantric Buddhism, the masculine principle is symbolized through ritual implements that play a crucial role in transformative practices. One such implement is the phurba, a ritual dagger or three-sided peg. The phurba, with its blade representing wisdom and its three faces embodying the trikaya (the three bodies of the Buddha), serves as a powerful symbol of the masculine energy’s capacity to conquer obstacles and pierce through ignorance.

Ritual implements, including the vajra and bell, are often used together to embody the union of the masculine and feminine principles in Tantric rituals. The vajra, representing indestructible and compassionate wisdom, is held in the right hand, symbolizing skillful means, while the bell, held in the left hand, symbolizes the feminine wisdom of emptiness. The harmonious use of these ritual implements in Tantric Buddhism signifies the integration of both masculine and feminine energies, leading practitioners towards a profound understanding of reality and the path to enlightenment.

[foundfamilyblog]

MAJOR SPOILERS FOR ARCANES ENDING BELOW:

Now, this is off topic for my blog but I'd like to shed light on something.

Arcanes ending. Namely the end of Jinx's character arc is what I believe to be one of the finest pieces of writing in the modern world with no exception. When Jinx is born at the end of 103 we see what happens to someone who heals wrong, we see the kind of monster they become when they aren't nurtured and given a proper environment to heal in. Powder becomes a monster known as Jinx who goes on to commit multiple acts of terrorism against Piltover. The way she feeds into this idea of being a monster as a way of lashing out at the pain she's felt from being "abandoned" by Vi is so incredibly realistic and relatable that it begs the question what has happened in the writers lives that allow them to understand such a transformation so thoroughly.

Then, at the end of season 1 we see Powder/Jinx finally embrace her new self with no more qualms about her identity, truly and finally one. Without any need to hold back anymore, she does something truly unforgivable and without redemption in the form of 9/11ing Piltover. Even in this moment though, she screams and cries in pain at how her old life is well and truly gone. The emotional turmoil of what she's done and what she's doing is too much to handle. To violently tear a new life out from the broken and beaten body of your old one is something no soul should have to do, but she does, and she makes it relatable.

Once we see her again in season 2, she has become much more lucid and comfortable in her own body as Jinx, the hallucinations have subsided for the most part and her inner turmoil is appropriately dealt with. Additionally she has a goal in mind now, she's chosen who she is and she knows what she wants to do: Kill Vi. The new life she has built for herself is purposeful, deliberate, no more a mish mash of two clashing ideals.

She wants to solidify her role as a monster once and for all, which ends in an epic battle between her and her sister, and at the very end of the fight right before she's taken out for good? A single soul sees the value in her life and risks everything to protect her. A child. Everyone, even Jinx is shocked by this because how could anyone ever love an ugly, broken thing like her? Let alone risk their life for her? The shock this instills in everyone buys Jinx enough time to escape with the kid, Isha. Imagine performing such horrible, inconceivable actions with no remorse and being full of such hatred, and then one person decides you're worth it. Just one person decides you are worthy of love and that they do love you and want you around. Can you imagine how that would shatter your world view? Being full of such self hatred and hatred for the world around you only to be shown warmth even in those times? This is exactly what happens to Jinx.

When we see her next, some time has passed, and she's even begun to drop the name Jinx. Her new friend, Isha, and her have begun a new life together and they look out for each other. The way Jinx describes her new life is "like I'm looking through glasses, except I can't tell if everything's blurry or clear." And what's clear to us as the audience is that Jinx is FINALLY healing. She is finally beginning to find some peace after all she has been through, and all it took was ONE soul, one singular person to love her even after all she had done. We go on to see her reunite with her sister, and somewhat with her father. We get to watch her slowly rebuild the life that was stolen from her and reconnect with those she lost, and those she hurt. This represents hope and change, rebirth and love, that maybe your sins aren't who you are. That you can change and love and be so wonderfully you with those who love you!

Isha dies. Isha, Jinx's anchor to the world, dies protecting her. Yet again Jinx loses everything. Her father is taken from her yet again in the process and the exact trauma that shaped her into Jinx is entirely recreated. Except, this time? There's no insanity. There's no hallucinations and mania. There's no rage or hate or flames or explosions or chaos or screaming. It's just sad. Nothing but sorrow fills Jinx up as she loses her one and only friend. She intends to kill herself at this point. She looks back at her life and sees how everyone she gets close to dies, gets hurt, or she in some way is preventing from being happy. That she alone is the perpetuator of a cycle of violence that has plagued her families lives for years and years. So she decides to give them closure. She tells Vi she can stop feeling bad for being happy and move on, she tells Cait she didn't know her Mom was in the explosion, and she leaves. Nothing more, just leaves. Doesn't tell anyone what she's going to do, she just does it. The intense guilt she feels is palpable in every breath she takes, it's clear she just wants to quietly leave this world without hurting anyone, just this once. Then the time finally comes, to end her life and finally be free of it all. Only to be stopped. One more remnant of her old life comes back and convinces her to stick around a little longer. Somehow, she agrees, but we all know that this is only temporary. The guilt someone feels after doing something so terrible, so unforgivable, can't be cleansed by a single conversation. She hates herself and just wants to stop hurting people, but she still has a small spark, something in her that has hope she can do good. So she delays her death to try one more time to be kind.

Next we see her, she's got a new look and is fighting alongside Vi, instead of against. She acknowledges their connection and at a pivotal moment, takes the fall. She saves her sisters life and "sacrifices" herself in the process. At the very last moment, she understands that there's another way out of her pain and hurting everyone around her instead of dying. She fakes her own death to everyone and escapes the country quietly. She tells no one and quietly escapes, with everyone having the closure of her death.

No more chasing her, no more thinking of what she might be plotting, no more hoping the old her will return. It's just over.

Her final action in Arcane is one of kindness, and healing to those she hurt. It is not redemption, but it is understanding. She accepts she is a bad person and may very well still hate herself, however she at the very least opens herself up to a new life far from those she hurt. And I think that's beautiful.

Anyway this is just my personal interpretation of the ending, I'm open to new ideas and down to discuss though! Btw I didn't proof read this so if it seems messed up anywhere that's why.

[beneathsilverstars]

hello for the ask game 9: any theories on stuff unexplained by the game?

I always love theories and thoughts and worldbuilding hcs etc so anything in that vein works :3

I think my favorite little worldbuilding headcanon is that Ka Bue is super chill about aromanticism and asexuality! Not in the same way as irl activism, but it's something that is understood and respected in their ideology, like transgenderism in Vaugarde. So if we combine the powers of everyone in the crew we'll get an entire queer-friendly worldview going lmao!

Maybe... Something about an overarching philosophy of understanding the self? In Vaugard they see the self as something you refine through making, creating and destroying and rebuilding, but in Ka Bue you're supposed to be uncovering and polishing what's already there. And part of that is understanding your position in relation to others, so they have a lot of little descriptive words for flavors of relationships and dynamics, and being the sort of person who seeks those dynamics. Like "oh i'm usually the comedic straight man of the friend group and i seek out jokesters who play well off of that". And that means that nonsexual romance, nonromantic sex partners, QPRs, etc, are all understood dynamics, and various kinds of friend and family and colleague relationships are seen as distinctly important, and being alone is seen as a valid dynamic!

Now that I've typed this out I love it more and more... I was originally just thinking about the metaphor of cutting and polishing a gemstone, but having a lot of little Dynamics that various people may find more or less relevant to themselves is a similar approach to having thousands of Expressions! And it meshes with the transphobia as well - you can describe yourself as having dysphoria but you're not supposed to go and try to change that.

And there's that Odile + Isabeau conversation where she gets really specific about their relationship: "We're not friends, we're associates. Colleagues. Allies at best." And she's obviously joking, but this hc puts some extra weight behind her making that particular sort of joke! Plus she's the one who's like, "I wouldn't call you all friends, that would be weird, we're more like family," and she gets mad about being called the mom. I love the idea that she has Very specific dynamic classifications in mind for her relationship with each member of the crew, and gets pissy that Vaugardian doesn't have the same nuance/connotations!

And this philosophy being the total opposite of the Change belief is so interesting for Odile in particular! It would definitely flavor people's perception of her in Ka Bue - oh, she's one of those fickle Vaugardians who change masks every day and will never truly understand themselves. No wonder she wanted to get actual Vaugardian perspective on their belief. Oh, how lovely it will be for her to synthesize the two extremes, and both discover and create who she is!!

[nonokoko13]

Rollo Flamme is autistic. I had suspicions about it but after reading his vignette I heard a voice in my head confirming it. God has told me the truth and I must spread the word

He would also be ok with Batman, if he's not his most favoured hero. Oh and he also probably has PTSD and depression. Thanks for coming to my ted talk

[miss-morland]

dennis in dtamhd is so bpd recovery coded i feel so much about it <333333

[hollow-vok]

Ohh im obssesed

[the-monkey-ruler]

Goodness, jttw will never run out of different ways the story can be expanded. I don’t know if there are any other books like this. I think something that helps is that there’s no ip law and religious people are more relaxed (I mean when Chinese take creative liberties, it gets iffy when it’s non-Chinese).

Xiyouji has been going on strong for nearly 100 years of media! It truly is a work of art that embodies the human spirit and can be adapted and relatable to any generation to any person. Not matter where you are from or how old you are there is always going to be something so human and so touching in Xiyouji that just captures people for years to come.

Here's to another 100 years of Xiyouji media!!

The closest thing I can think of to another book or franchise that is this widely known could be like Shakespeare but that sadly has been teetering in the past few years. I kinda miss the modern adaptions of Shakespearian plays. And they don't even have games so another disadvantage.

It helps that Xiyouji mostly cameos Daoist and Buddhist figures in its story, hence while it does have a lot of religious messages and is a religious pilgrimage leads to a lot of fantastical worldbuilding and a great way for both patheons to be included. The only other story I can think of that has that kind of storytelling in like Dante's Inferno which while it is well-known certainly doesn't have that much of a media presence.

[la0hu]

masha broke a bowl by accident in the kitchen and when i brought her the broom and dustpan and asked her if she was okay, she looked at me, straight-faced, and said, "no, i'm not okay." and then i realized she meant that she still feels emotionally abused by the house somehow, and i felt a flash of anger because i am so sick of her shit, and i rephrased, "are you physically injured?" and she gave me another look and said "i'm physically okay." and then when connie asked from her room "what's going on?" masha replied "nothing new." like fuck off ohhhhhhhh my god

[hecksupremechips]

My ass was trying so hard not to jump up and down with glee playing yttd with my sister and getting to the shin reveal I was like MY GUY MY FUNNY LAD MY SILLY RABBIT