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esotericalchemist · 2 months ago

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𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐡: 𝐔𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐇𝐢𝐝𝐝𝐞𝐧 𝐃𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐬 ⊹₊⟡⋆

Lilith in astrology represents the primal, instinctual side of our nature—the parts of ourselves that are often hidden, suppressed, or rejected. It embodies our deep-seated desires for freedom, power, and autonomy, pushing us to break free from societal expectations and limitations. While Lilith highlights where we can embrace our wildness and independence, it also reveals our struggles with control, rebellion, and vulnerability. Understanding Lilith's placement in your chart helps you confront these shadow aspects, offering the opportunity to reclaim your authentic self by transforming old patterns into sources of strength and empowerment.

𝐀𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐡

With Lilith in Aries, you’re fueled by a powerful drive for independence, self-empowerment, and assertiveness. Your energy is daring and fearless, pushing you to break through any barriers that limit you. The power of Lilith in Aries shows in your ability to confidently stand your ground and take decisive action, even in the face of resistance. You have a strong desire to be in control of your own path, making you fiercely protective of your autonomy. Whether in relationships or your career, freedom is essential, and you’ll fight against anything that threatens it.

The shadow side of Lilith in Aries involves confronting issues related to impulsivity, anger, or recklessness. You may wrestle with control and power dynamics, often feeling the need to dominate or rebel without fully considering the consequences. To truly harness Lilith’s potential, you must learn to direct your assertiveness in a productive way—leading and inspiring others without crossing boundaries. The challenge is finding a balance between asserting yourself and working with others, turning your raw energy into a source of leadership and courage. By embracing your inner strength while managing impulses, you unlock the true depth of your personal power.

Through the Houses:

1st House: Lilith in the 1st house makes you unapologetically assertive and focused on personal power. Others may find your boldness intimidating. Embrace your uniqueness and lead by example, but be mindful not to overpower those around you.

2nd House: Your connection to material possessions and self-worth can be unconventional. While you have the potential to create abundance independently, self-worth may become a struggle. Use Lilith’s energy to ground yourself in values beyond material success, standing firm in your sense of self.

3rd House: Your communication style is direct and bold, often challenging the status quo. Embrace your ability to speak your truth confidently, but be careful not to become too aggressive. Use your curiosity to empower others through your words.

4th House: A rebellious streak may show up in your home and family life, as you seek freedom from traditional roles. Lilith’s energy can help you break away from unhealthy family dynamics and create a home that truly reflects who you are.

5th House: Your creativity and love life are marked by independence. You may crave excitement and dominance in romantic relationships. Use your energy to express yourself authentically through creative outlets, while avoiding impulsive or destructive choices in love.

6th House: In your daily work and routines, you resist authority and value independence. To harness this energy, find work that allows you the freedom you seek, but avoid rebelling without purpose. Channel your desire for autonomy into serving others innovatively.

7th House: Relationships are where your Lilith energy is most intense. You may seek control or resist commitment. To reach your full potential, aim for balanced partnerships that allow both freedom and connection to coexist.

8th House: Lilith in the 8th house makes you fearless in confronting transformation and power struggles. You crave deep, transformative experiences. Use this energy to explore life’s mysteries and face your fears, but be mindful of avoiding manipulation.

9th House: Your need for freedom shows up in your pursuit of knowledge, travel, and spirituality. You resist traditional beliefs and are drawn to unconventional philosophies. Harness Lilith’s energy by embracing your truth while respecting others’ paths.

10th House: In your career, you may challenge authority and rebel against societal norms. Use Lilith’s energy to carve out a unique path to success, but be careful not to burn bridges along the way. Leadership roles can help you thrive.

11th House: You seek independence in group settings and social circles. Use Lilith’s energy to revolutionize your community, but be cautious of alienating yourself by being overly dominant. Find ways to contribute while still honoring your need for freedom.

12th House: Lilith in the 12th house brings hidden desires and power. You may be drawn to exploring the subconscious and spiritual realms. Use this energy to uncover your hidden strengths, but be wary of self-sabotage or withdrawing from reality.

𝐓𝐚𝐮𝐫𝐮𝐬 𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐡

With Lilith in Taurus, you possess a deep craving for stability, sensual pleasures, and material security. Your power is rooted in a profound connection to the physical world—whether through your body, nature, or the pursuit of comfort and luxury. You have a strong need to control your environment, ensuring that you feel safe and secure. While the desire for pleasure and indulgence is prominent, Lilith in Taurus also unlocks your path to self-sufficiency and inner strength. You thrive when you create beauty and abundance on your own terms, without becoming overly attached to material possessions or comfort.

Shadow work with Lilith in Taurus involves confronting attachments to material things, pleasure, or the fear of change. You may find yourself struggling with possessiveness or a resistance to letting go, holding on to what feels familiar even when it no longer serves you. To truly embrace Lilith’s potential, you must learn that real security comes from within, not from external sources. By letting go of the need to control everything around you, you can tap into your creative and sensual power, finding satisfaction in both material and spiritual wealth.

Through the Houses:

1st House: Your energy is grounded, sensual, and magnetic, giving you an unshakable presence. To harness this power, embrace your natural strength and confidence without relying too much on how others perceive you.

2nd House: You deeply desire financial security and material comfort but may struggle with possessiveness. Use Lilith’s energy to cultivate self-worth that isn’t solely tied to material wealth and build stability through creative and independent means.

3rd House: Your communication is practical and persuasive, often focused on concrete results. Embrace this by using your voice to create value in your community or work, but be open to new ideas and resist holding too tightly to your viewpoints.

4th House: You long for a stable, beautiful home environment, sometimes clinging to outdated family dynamics. To unlock Lilith’s potential, create a nurturing space that supports your well-being, and release rigid attachments to comfort and tradition.

5th House: You find pleasure in creativity, romance, and personal expression. Use this energy to fully engage in your passions and artistic pursuits, but be mindful of not controlling or overindulging in fleeting pleasures.

6th House: Your daily work and routines are motivated by a desire for stability and comfort. Lilith’s energy can help you create sustainable habits that promote well-being, but avoid becoming too rigid in your approach to work and health.

7th House: In relationships, you may seek security and control, which can sometimes lead to possessiveness. To fully harness this energy, build partnerships based on trust and mutual independence, allowing for both stability and personal freedom.

8th House: You are drawn to deep, transformative experiences, especially through shared resources or intimate relationships. Use Lilith’s power to confront fears around loss and control, embracing transformation and renewal with courage.

9th House: Your desire for security can extend to your beliefs, leading to resistance to new philosophies. Lilith’s energy encourages you to embrace diverse perspectives and experiences, allowing for personal growth and expansion.

10th House: You seek recognition and material success in your career. Use Lilith’s energy to build a professional life that aligns with your core values, while being open to change and not clinging to traditional definitions of success.

11th House: You desire stability in social circles and may resist change within your community. To unlock Lilith’s potential, embrace new ideas and collaborations, allowing your social networks to evolve while honoring your need for security.

12th House: Lilith in the 12th house brings hidden desires for control or security. Use this energy to explore spiritual practices that ground you in the present, releasing attachments based on fear and embracing inner peace and healing.

𝐆𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐢 𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐡

With Lilith in Gemini, your strength lies in your intellect, communication, and adaptability. You have an intense need for mental stimulation and freedom in both thought and expression. Curious and versatile, you’re naturally drawn to new ideas and often find yourself challenging conventional wisdom. Lilith’s energy in Gemini shows through your ability to speak your truth and question established norms. However, this can sometimes result in restlessness or scattered energy if not properly channeled. You thrive when exploring multiple perspectives and communicating freely, but you may struggle with superficiality or the temptation to manipulate others through words.

Shadow work for Lilith in Gemini involves addressing tendencies like inconsistency, gossip, or using your intellect to manipulate or avoid deeper emotional truths. You may also need to confront a fear of commitment, whether in ideas, relationships, or projects, as you seek constant mental stimulation. To harness Lilith’s full potential, you must find a balance between your desire for freedom and the need for depth and focus. When you use your sharp mind and communication skills wisely, you can inspire and enlighten others while staying true to your core values.

Through the Houses:

1st House: You project a sharp, witty, and dynamic presence, often keeping others on their toes. Use your bold self-expression to stand out, but avoid being overly restless or changeable in how you present yourself to the world.

2nd House: Your approach to material wealth may involve unconventional or mentally stimulating ways of achieving financial security. Use Lilith’s energy to build value through intellectual pursuits while avoiding superficial or quick financial gains.

3rd House: Your communication style is bold and direct, with a thirst for knowledge and variety. Channel this energy into exploring diverse topics and engaging in thought-provoking discussions, but be careful not to dominate conversations or use your words manipulatively.

4th House: You may crave intellectual freedom in your home environment, sometimes emotionally distancing yourself from family. Use Lilith’s energy to cultivate open communication within your family while fostering deeper emotional connections.

5th House: You seek excitement and intellectual stimulation in romance and creative pursuits. To unlock Lilith’s power, embrace your playful, expressive side in love and art, but be wary of chasing fleeting pleasures or forming superficial connections.

6th House: Your work thrives on mental stimulation and variety, but you may resist routines. Use Lilith’s energy to seek engaging, mentally challenging tasks, while learning to stay focused on practical matters without losing interest.

7th House: In relationships, you crave mental connection and freedom of expression. Use Lilith’s energy to create stimulating partnerships, but be mindful not to avoid emotional intimacy by relying solely on intellectual connections.

8th House: You’re drawn to exploring hidden truths and taboo topics, often using your intellect to delve into life’s mysteries. To fully embrace this power, balance your curiosity about the unknown while avoiding manipulation in intimate relationships.

9th House: Your thirst for intellectual freedom leads you to explore diverse philosophies and cultures. Use Lilith’s energy to challenge traditional beliefs and embrace new ideas, but avoid spreading yourself too thin in your search for knowledge.

10th House: You may challenge authority figures or traditional career paths, seeking intellectual freedom in your professional life. Use Lilith’s power to build a career that honors your independence, but be careful not to burn bridges along the way.

11th House: Your social life is fueled by mental stimulation, and you’re often drawn to groups that challenge conventional ideas. Harness Lilith’s energy by contributing your insights to social causes or collective goals, while avoiding detachment from those with different perspectives.

12th House: Lilith in the 12th house brings a hidden need for intellectual exploration and mental freedom. Use this energy to dive into the unconscious mind through writing, spirituality, or research, but be cautious of isolating yourself from meaningful relationships.

𝐂𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐡

With Lilith in Cancer, your strength comes from your emotional depth, intuition, and desire for emotional security. You have a strong need to nurture and protect, but there is also a fierce sense of independence regarding your emotional life. You may resist vulnerability, fearing abandonment or rejection, which can lead to self-protective tendencies or attempts to control relationships. Lilith in Cancer challenges you to explore emotional autonomy, establish healthy boundaries, and balance your nurturing instincts with personal independence. Your sensitivity and empathy are immense, but you may struggle with holding onto past emotional wounds or becoming overly protective of your inner world.

Shadow work with Lilith in Cancer involves facing emotional wounds, fears of abandonment, and tendencies to control relationships for emotional security. It’s important to explore how past emotional traumas shape your current behavior and learn to embrace vulnerability without fear. To fully tap into Lilith’s potential, you must balance caring for others with self-care and emotional independence. When you embrace your intuitive power without letting fear dictate your actions, you can form deep, meaningful connections while staying true to yourself.

Through the Houses:

1st House: You project a nurturing and intuitive energy but may shield yourself from emotional vulnerability. Use Lilith’s power by embracing emotional authenticity while avoiding defensiveness or becoming overly protective of your personal space.

2nd House: Your sense of security, both emotional and material, is closely tied together. Use Lilith’s energy to develop emotional and financial independence, but avoid clinging to material possessions as a source of comfort.

3rd House: Your communication style is deeply emotional, often connecting with others through shared feelings and memories. Use this power to foster meaningful conversations, but be mindful of not using emotions to control or manipulate in relationships.

4th House: You have a strong connection to home and family, possibly seeking control over your emotional space. To harness Lilith’s power, create a nurturing home environment while learning to release past family wounds and emotional baggage.

5th House: Your creative and romantic life is intertwined with your emotions, and you seek deep connections in love. Use Lilith’s energy to fully express your creativity and passion, but resist becoming overly dependent on others for emotional validation.

6th House: Your daily routines and work are emotionally driven, and you may resist authority at work. Use Lilith’s power to create a balanced work-life routine that nurtures your emotional well-being, while avoiding burnout or emotional exhaustion.

7th House: In relationships, you crave emotional closeness but may fear vulnerability or rejection. To unleash Lilith’s energy, pursue partnerships where emotional security and independence coexist, and learn to trust without the fear of abandonment.

8th House: You are drawn to deep, transformative emotional experiences, particularly in intimate relationships or shared resources. Use Lilith’s power for emotional healing and growth, but avoid using emotional intensity to control others.

9th House: Your emotional security may be closely tied to your belief system, and you may resist new ideas that challenge your emotional comfort. Use Lilith’s energy to explore new philosophies and spiritual practices that expand your emotional understanding.

10th House: Your career may be deeply connected to your emotional needs, and you might seek recognition for your nurturing qualities. Use Lilith’s energy to build a career that reflects your emotional values, but avoid using your role to emotionally control others.

11th House: You seek emotional connection in social groups or causes, but may feel vulnerable in group settings. To unlock Lilith’s power, contribute emotionally to your community while maintaining strong personal boundaries and emotional security.

12th House: Lilith in the 12th house suggests hidden emotional needs and desires. Use this energy to explore your subconscious emotions through spiritual practices or creative outlets, but be cautious of emotionally isolating yourself from the world.

𝐋𝐞𝐨 𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐡

With Lilith in Leo, your power stems from creativity, self-expression, and a strong desire for recognition. You are driven by the need to be seen, admired, and appreciated for your unique qualities. However, Lilith in Leo can create a tension between craving approval and staying true to authentic self-expression. You naturally gravitate toward the spotlight, seeking to shine both personally and professionally. At times, though, you may wrestle with issues of pride, fear of rejection, or placing too much emphasis on validation from others, which can limit your creative potential. When you tap into your true inner power, you radiate confidence, and your bold, charismatic energy has the ability to inspire others.

Shadow work for Lilith in Leo involves confronting the need for constant admiration and the fear of going unseen or unappreciated. You may need to explore issues around pride or tendencies to dominate the spotlight as a way of compensating for deeper insecurities. To unlock Lilith’s potential fully, you must cultivate confidence from within, focusing on authentic self-expression rather than external approval. When you embrace your inner brilliance and share your gifts freely, you uplift others while maintaining a strong, secure sense of self.

Through the Houses:

1st House: You project a magnetic, confident, and bold persona, often seeking recognition. To unleash Lilith’s power, embrace your natural charisma and leadership abilities, but avoid relying solely on external validation for your self-worth.

2nd House: You may seek recognition through material possessions and self-worth. Use Lilith’s energy to find value in your unique talents and abilities rather than relying solely on material wealth or external achievements for your sense of worth.

3rd House: Your communication style is expressive and dramatic, often commanding attention through your words. To use Lilith’s energy, speak with authenticity and creativity, but be cautious of overshadowing others or dominating conversations.

4th House: You may crave attention or recognition in your family or home life, sometimes adopting a dominant role. Use Lilith’s power to create a nurturing home environment where your emotional needs for recognition are met, while allowing space for others to shine too.

5th House: Lilith’s energy thrives in creativity, romance, and self-expression. To fully harness this power, express yourself boldly in both love and creative pursuits, but avoid becoming overly dependent on romantic validation or the need to impress others.

6th House: In your work environment, you may seek recognition for your efforts, sometimes leading to pride in your daily routines. Use Lilith’s energy to create a work life that reflects your individuality, while avoiding ego-driven competition with colleagues.

7th House: Relationships are intense with Lilith in the 7th house, as you crave admiration from your partners. To balance this energy, seek partnerships where both individuals can shine equally, ensuring your need for attention doesn't overshadow your partner's needs.

8th House: You are drawn to intense and transformative experiences in relationships, where you can fully express your power. Use Lilith’s energy to explore deep emotional connections and uncover hidden aspects of yourself, but avoid using intimacy as a means of control or dominance.

9th House: Your desire for recognition extends to your beliefs and philosophies, seeking to stand out in intellectual or spiritual circles. To unleash Lilith’s power, share your insights with passion, but remain mindful not to overshadow others’ beliefs.

10th House: You crave recognition and success in your career, often aiming for leadership roles or positions of authority. Use Lilith’s energy to build a career where your creativity and confidence can flourish, but be cautious of letting pride or the need for validation harm your professional relationships.

11th House: In group settings, you may seek to be the center of attention, craving recognition from peers. To use Lilith’s power, contribute your unique ideas and creativity to collective efforts, but ensure you're not dominating the spotlight at the expense of the group’s goals.

12th House: Lilith in the 12th house suggests hidden desires for recognition and self-expression. Use this energy to explore creative or spiritual outlets that allow you to shine behind the scenes, but be mindful of not suppressing your need for attention, as it could lead to feelings of isolation.

𝐕𝐢𝐫𝐠𝐨 𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐡

With Lilith in Virgo, your power lies in your sharp intellect, meticulous attention to detail, and drive for perfection. You have a deep desire to improve both yourself and your surroundings, often seeking control through order and structure. There is a strong need for independence in managing tasks and responsibilities, but Lilith in Virgo can also lead to tendencies like self-criticism and overworking. You may feel pressured to meet impossibly high standards, which can cause internal tension. While you desire to be of service and make meaningful contributions, the challenge is learning to balance control with surrender and knowing when to let go.

Shadow work for Lilith in Virgo involves facing perfectionism, self-doubt, and the fear of judgment or not measuring up. You might feel compelled to control your environment or be overly critical of yourself and others as a way to protect yourself from vulnerability. To fully harness Lilith’s energy, you must embrace your imperfections and understand that true strength comes from adaptability and acceptance. When you channel your precise nature into constructive service without being ruled by the fear of failure, you can become a powerful agent of healing and improvement in your own life and in the lives of others.

Through the Houses:

1st House: You project an aura of perfectionism and efficiency, often driven by the need to control how others perceive you. To unleash Lilith’s power, embrace your analytical nature while avoiding excessive self-criticism, focusing on authentic growth rather than seeking external approval.

2nd House: Your sense of material security may be closely tied to control over your resources. Use Lilith’s energy to build financial stability through discipline and service, but be careful not to equate your self-worth solely with material success or productivity.

3rd House: Your communication style is precise and detail-oriented, often focused on practical concerns. Use Lilith’s energy to express your thoughts clearly and analytically, but resist the urge to overanalyze or be too critical in your conversations.

4th House: You may seek control and perfection within your home and family life, aiming to maintain order. Use Lilith’s power to create a nurturing environment through organization, while allowing space for emotional spontaneity and embracing imperfection.

5th House: Creativity and romance may feel like areas where you need to perform flawlessly or take on too much responsibility. To tap into Lilith’s energy, let yourself enjoy creative expression and love without worrying about perfection or controlling the outcome.

6th House: You are driven by the need to serve and improve, often feeling a strong sense of responsibility regarding work and health. Use Lilith’s power to create efficient routines that support your well-being, but be mindful not to overburden yourself with perfectionist tendencies.

7th House: In relationships, you may seek perfection or feel the need to "fix" your partner. Use Lilith’s energy to cultivate partnerships where growth and service are mutual, avoiding the trap of being overly critical or trying to control your partner’s flaws.

8th House: You are drawn to transformative experiences that involve analyzing hidden or complex aspects of life. Use Lilith’s energy to explore deep emotional healing and psychological insight, but avoid obsessing over control in intimate relationships or shared resources.

9th House: Your search for knowledge and truth may be driven by a need to understand everything perfectly, which can limit your openness to new ideas. To unleash Lilith’s power, embrace learning and exploration without needing to have all the answers right away.

10th House: Your career is marked by a drive for perfection and success, and you may be highly critical of your achievements. Use Lilith’s energy to create a fulfilling professional life, recognizing your skills while allowing yourself to make mistakes and grow from them without fear of failure.

11th House: In social groups, you may feel compelled to organize or improve collective efforts. To use Lilith’s power, contribute your talents to group goals while releasing the need to control how others participate or how the group is perceived.

12th House: Lilith in the 12th house indicates hidden desires for control over your spiritual or subconscious life. Use this energy to explore self-healing and spiritual practices that help you release perfectionism, embracing inner peace and balance.

𝐋𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚 𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐡

With Lilith in Libra, your strength lies in your ability to navigate relationships, social dynamics, and the pursuit of harmony. You have a strong desire for balance, fairness, and beauty in all aspects of life, but Lilith here pushes you to confront the shadow side of your need for approval and peace. There is a powerful drive for independence in your interactions with others, which can make you resist relying too heavily on partnerships. You may struggle with the tendency to please others at the expense of your own needs or to subtly manipulate situations to maintain harmony. However, your true power emerges when you embrace authenticity and strike a balance between self-assertion and compromise.

Shadow work for Lilith in Libra involves confronting your fear of conflict and the need to be liked. You may need to face tendencies to sacrifice your own desires for the sake of peace or to manipulate relationships to avoid discomfort. To fully unlock Lilith’s potential, you must learn to assert yourself without fear of rejection and allow relationships to evolve naturally, even if it temporarily disrupts harmony. When you embrace your inner strength and combine it with your natural diplomacy, you become a force for authentic connection and fairness.

Through the Houses:

1st House: You project charm, grace, and a desire for harmony, but may hide your true desires to avoid conflict. To unleash Lilith’s power, embrace your authenticity and express yourself confidently without fear of others' reactions.

2nd House: You seek material security and self-worth through relationships, but may depend too much on others for validation. Use Lilith’s energy to build your own values and sense of self-worth without relying on external approval or material success.

3rd House: Your communication style focuses on maintaining balance, but you may avoid difficult conversations. Use Lilith’s energy to speak your truth, even if it challenges others, and embrace the power of honest, direct communication.

4th House: You may seek peace and balance at home, often sacrificing your emotional needs for family harmony. Use Lilith’s power to create a home environment where your emotional truth is honored, even if it disrupts the status quo.

5th House: Creativity and romance may be areas where you seek validation from others. To tap into Lilith’s energy, express yourself authentically in love and creative pursuits, without relying on external praise for your sense of self-worth.

6th House: You may strive for harmony and perfection in your work life, sometimes focusing too much on others’ needs. Use Lilith’s power to find balance, ensuring that both your needs and those of others are respected in your daily routines.

7th House: Relationships are central to your life, but you may lose yourself in partnerships or prioritize harmony over authenticity. To unleash Lilith’s power, create balanced relationships where your needs are asserted, while also valuing compromise.

8th House: You are drawn to deep, intense relationships that challenge your need for control and balance. Use Lilith’s energy to explore emotional depth and transformation in partnerships, but avoid using intimacy to manipulate or maintain harmony.

9th House: You may seek intellectual or spiritual harmony, avoiding beliefs that disrupt your balance. To unlock Lilith’s potential, explore new philosophies and ideas that challenge your worldview, embracing discomfort as a catalyst for growth.

10th House: You seek success in your career through diplomacy and charm, but may struggle with asserting your individuality. Use Lilith’s energy to build a career that reflects your true values, without fearing conflict or others' disapproval.

11th House: In social groups, you desire harmony and fairness, often acting as the mediator. To use Lilith’s power, contribute your diplomatic skills while also asserting your unique ideas, even if they go against the group’s expectations.

12th House: Lilith in the 12th house suggests hidden desires for harmony and balance that may conflict with deeper emotional or spiritual needs. Use this energy to explore unconscious fears that prevent you from expressing your true self in relationships, and embrace emotional freedom.

𝐒𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐩𝐢𝐨 𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐡

With Lilith in Scorpio, your power is rooted in emotional intensity, depth, and a natural ability to embrace transformation. You have a strong desire for control, particularly in emotional and intimate relationships, and are drawn to uncover the deeper, hidden aspects of life. This placement gives you a magnetic and mysterious energy, but it also pushes you to confront issues surrounding power, secrecy, and vulnerability. Your desire for independence and mastery over your emotions may cause you to resist trust and intimacy, even though these are key to unlocking your true potential. Lilith in Scorpio challenges you to dive into the depths of your psyche, confront your fears, and emerge stronger and transformed.

Shadow work with Lilith in Scorpio involves facing issues of control, fear of betrayal, and the instinct to manipulate situations to avoid vulnerability. You may need to confront your fear of emotional exposure or your tendency to hold onto secrets and hidden agendas. To fully unlock Lilith’s potential, you must embrace emotional honesty and the strength that comes from vulnerability. When you stop resisting change and transformation, you access a profound potential for regeneration and healing—not only for yourself but for others as well.

Through the Houses:

1st House: You project an intense, magnetic presence that can both attract and intimidate others. To unleash Lilith’s power, embrace your emotional depth and authenticity, allowing others to see the real you instead of hiding behind a protective facade.

2nd House: Your relationship with material security and self-worth may be tied to control and the need for security. Use Lilith’s energy to develop financial independence and confidence, but be wary of becoming overly possessive or attached to material success.

3rd House: Your communication style is probing and intense, often seeking to uncover hidden truths. Use Lilith’s power to engage in deep, meaningful conversations, but avoid manipulating or controlling others with your words.

4th House: You may experience intense emotions related to family and home life, feeling a need to control your domestic environment. Use Lilith’s energy to confront emotional wounds from the past and create a home space that fosters transformation and healing.

5th House: You seek intensity and depth in your creative and romantic pursuits, craving passionate connections. To express Lilith’s energy, embrace your creative and romantic desires without fear of rejection or betrayal, but avoid using love as a form of control.

6th House: In work and daily routines, you may become focused on control and perfectionism. Use Lilith’s energy to transform your work life by embracing change and adaptability, rather than clinging to rigid systems and habits.

7th House: Relationships may bring up power struggles, with intense emotions surfacing in partnerships. To harness Lilith’s power, cultivate trust and emotional honesty, letting go of the need to control the outcome of your relationships.

8th House: Lilith thrives in the 8th house, amplifying your interest in transformation, shared resources, and the mysteries of life. Use this energy for deep emotional healing and growth, but be mindful of avoiding power struggles or fear of loss.

9th House: You may seek intensity and depth in intellectual or spiritual pursuits, craving transformative experiences. To fully embrace Lilith’s power, explore philosophies or spiritual practices that challenge your current beliefs, allowing yourself to evolve through them.

10th House: Your career may be marked by intense ambition and a desire for control and recognition. Use Lilith’s energy to achieve success on your own terms, but be cautious of becoming overly manipulative or secretive in your professional relationships.

11th House: You seek deep, meaningful connections in social circles and may challenge group dynamics. To use Lilith’s power, engage in social causes that allow for transformation and empowerment, but be careful to avoid power struggles within your community.

12th House: Lilith in the 12th house brings hidden fears and desires for control to the surface. Use this energy to explore your subconscious through spiritual or psychological practices, but avoid isolating yourself emotionally. Embrace your inner power without fear of the unknown.

𝐒𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐬 𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐡

With Lilith in Sagittarius, your power comes from your relentless quest for truth, freedom, and wisdom. You have a strong desire to explore, both intellectually and physically, often seeking to break free from societal norms and conventional thinking. Independence is key for you, and you may resist any attempts to confine your beliefs or restrict your freedom. Lilith in Sagittarius can create tension between your desire for freedom and your tendency to rebel against authority or tradition. You’re driven to explore new philosophies, cultures, and ideas, but may also struggle with restlessness or a fear of commitment. When you embrace this energy, you can inspire others with your boldness and your adventurous spirit in the search for meaning.

Shadow work for Lilith in Sagittarius involves confronting issues of overconfidence, dogmatism, or the fear of being trapped. You may need to examine any tendencies to rebel simply for the sake of rebellion or to impose your beliefs on others. To unlock Lilith’s full potential, you must balance your desire for freedom with a deeper understanding and connection. When you channel your passion for truth into positive exploration, you can become a visionary leader, helping others break free from limiting beliefs while expanding your own horizons.

Through the Houses:

1st House: You project an adventurous and free-spirited persona, often challenging norms and pushing boundaries. Use Lilith’s energy to inspire others with your independence, but be mindful not to come across as overly arrogant or dismissive of other perspectives.

2nd House: Your relationship with material security and values may be tied to your need for freedom. Use Lilith’s power to achieve financial independence in unconventional ways, but be cautious not to sacrifice stability just for the sake of excitement.

3rd House: You communicate boldly, always seeking intellectual freedom, often challenging conventional wisdom. Embrace Lilith’s energy by exploring new ideas, but be careful not to alienate others by being too forceful with your opinions.

4th House: You may resist traditional family roles or feel the need for freedom from your home environment. Use Lilith’s energy to create a home that reflects your adventurous values, while addressing any restlessness or avoidance of commitment.

5th House: You seek excitement and adventure in both creativity and romance, often rebelling against conventional expectations. To fully express Lilith’s power, embrace your playful, passionate side, but avoid being overly impulsive or reckless in love.

6th House: You desire freedom in your work and daily routines, often resisting rigid schedules or authority. Use Lilith’s energy to create a flexible routine that allows for personal growth, while being careful not to neglect responsibilities.

7th House: In relationships, you seek intellectual and spiritual freedom, often avoiding traditional commitments. To unleash Lilith’s power, cultivate partnerships that prioritize mutual growth and exploration, while ensuring that you don’t shy away from emotional intimacy.

8th House: You are drawn to transformative experiences, often exploring taboo subjects or intense emotional connections. Use Lilith’s energy to seek wisdom through transformation, but avoid using power or control as a way to feel free.

9th House: This placement amplifies your desire for philosophical, spiritual, or cultural exploration. To unlock Lilith’s potential, fully embrace your quest for truth, but remain open to learning from others without becoming dogmatic.

10th House: You may challenge traditional career paths, seeking a profession that aligns with your need for freedom. Use Lilith’s energy to create a career that allows you to inspire others, but be cautious not to rebel against authority without cause.

11th House: You’re drawn to social causes that align with your ideals of freedom and progress. Harness Lilith’s energy by contributing to collective goals that push boundaries, but be mindful of not becoming overly radical or dismissive of opposing viewpoints.

12th House: Lilith in the 12th house brings hidden desires for intellectual and spiritual freedom. Use this energy to explore your subconscious through travel, study, or spiritual practices, but avoid using the pursuit of freedom as an escape from reality or commitments.

𝐂𝐚𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐡

With Lilith in Capricorn, your strength lies in your drive for success, authority, and control over your life’s path. You have a strong desire for recognition and respect, and you're willing to work hard to achieve your ambitions. Lilith in Capricorn amplifies your determination, but it also brings challenges related to control, fear of failure, and feelings of inadequacy. You may suppress your emotions to maintain a façade of strength, or you might fear vulnerability, which can create distance between you and others. Your need for independence and self-mastery is powerful, often leading you to prioritize long-term security and stability, but sometimes at the cost of your emotional needs.

Shadow work with Lilith in Capricorn involves addressing fears of failure, rejection, or the belief that you must constantly prove your worth through achievements. You may need to confront tendencies to prioritize work and success over personal relationships or to be overly controlling in your pursuit of stability. To fully unlock Lilith’s potential, you must embrace vulnerability and recognize that true power comes from balancing ambition with emotional authenticity. When you align your goals with your inner values and allow yourself to open up emotionally, you can achieve great success without sacrificing personal fulfillment.

Through the Houses:

1st House: You project a strong, ambitious presence, often feeling the need to control how others see you. To unleash Lilith’s power, embrace your leadership abilities while allowing yourself to be vulnerable and authentic without fearing judgment.

2nd House: You may seek material security and financial success as a way to feel in control. Use Lilith’s energy to build wealth through disciplined effort, but avoid tying your self-worth solely to material achievements.

3rd House: Your communication is authoritative and structured, focused on practical matters. Use Lilith’s power to share your insights and ideas, but be careful not to become rigid or dismissive of other perspectives.

4th House: You may feel the need to control or structure your home and family life, sometimes suppressing emotional needs. Use Lilith’s energy to create a stable home environment while allowing space for emotional vulnerability and connection.

5th House: You may feel pressure to perform perfectly in creativity or romance, seeking recognition in these areas. To express Lilith’s power, embrace your creative passions and romantic desires without fear of failure or the need for perfection.

6th House: In your work and routines, you may be driven by a need for control and efficiency, sometimes becoming overly focused on productivity. Use Lilith’s energy to balance your work ethic with self-care, avoiding burnout from overworking.

7th House: In relationships, you may seek control or resist vulnerability. To harness Lilith’s power, pursue partnerships where both individuals share authority and emotional openness, allowing for true intimacy without power struggles.

8th House: You may be drawn to control and transformation in shared resources or deep emotional connections. Use Lilith’s energy to explore emotional intimacy and financial partnerships, but be mindful of not becoming overly controlling or fearful of loss.

9th House: You may seek authority in philosophical or educational areas, often pursuing recognition through intellectual or spiritual mastery. To unlock Lilith’s potential, embrace new ideas and philosophies without needing to dominate or control your beliefs.

10th House: Lilith in the 10th house amplifies your ambition and drive for success, pushing you toward recognition in your career. Use this energy to build a professional life aligned with your true values, while avoiding excessive focus on status or power.

11th House: You may seek control or authority in social circles or group dynamics, desiring recognition for your contributions. Use Lilith’s energy to contribute to collective goals with discipline and vision, while allowing for collaboration and flexibility within the group.

12th House: Lilith in the 12th house brings hidden desires for control and authority over your subconscious or spiritual life. Use this energy to explore inner transformation and healing, but be cautious of isolating yourself emotionally or suppressing your deeper needs.

𝐀𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐬 𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐡

With Lilith in Aquarius, your strength comes from your individuality, rebellious spirit, and desire to break free from societal norms. You have a strong need for independence and freedom, often challenging authority, traditions, or anything that feels restrictive. Lilith in Aquarius amplifies your visionary and innovative nature, urging you to express your uniqueness and contribute to society in unconventional ways. However, this placement can also bring challenges around emotional detachment, fear of intimacy, or a tendency to rebel for rebellion’s sake. You’re drawn to social causes and feel a deep responsibility to bring about change, but this may sometimes lead to emotional distancing or suppressing personal feelings to fit into collective ideals.

Shadow work with Lilith in Aquarius involves facing fears of losing individuality in relationships or groups. You may resist closeness, fearing it will compromise your freedom, which can result in emotional detachment. To fully unlock Lilith’s potential, you must embrace both your need for freedom and your capacity to form genuine connections. True power lies in balancing your individuality with meaningful relationships, using your innovative spirit to inspire collective progress. By integrating personal freedom and emotional openness, you can become a trailblazer for social change.

Through the Houses:

1st House: You project an eccentric, independent persona, often resisting conformity. To unleash Lilith’s power, embrace your unique identity while allowing yourself to connect with others without fearing a loss of individuality.

2nd House: You may have unconventional views on material security and self-worth, often prioritizing freedom over stability. Use Lilith’s energy to achieve financial independence through innovative methods, but avoid rejecting structure entirely for the sake of freedom.

3rd House: Your communication is unconventional and forward-thinking, often challenging traditional ideas. Use Lilith’s power to share your revolutionary ideas and insights, but be careful not to distance yourself from others by being too detached or impersonal.

4th House: You may crave emotional freedom in your home life, often resisting traditional family roles or structures. Use Lilith’s energy to create a home environment that celebrates individuality, while allowing space for deeper emotional connections.

5th House: You seek excitement and freedom in creative and romantic pursuits, often rebelling against conventional expectations. To express Lilith’s energy fully, engage in creativity and love with an open mind, but avoid detachment from deeper emotional bonds.

6th House: Your work and routines are driven by a desire for freedom and innovation, often resisting traditional structures in daily life. Use Lilith’s energy to create a flexible work environment that suits your need for independence, while avoiding inconsistency or chaos.

7th House: In relationships, you may resist traditional partnerships, craving independence and freedom. To harness Lilith’s power, seek relationships where both individuals can express their uniqueness while maintaining emotional connection and balance.

8th House: You are drawn to exploring unconventional or taboo subjects related to intimacy, transformation, or shared resources. Use Lilith’s energy to delve into deeper emotional or psychological realms, but avoid detachment as a defense mechanism in intimate relationships.

9th House: Your quest for truth and meaning is unconventional, and you may challenge traditional beliefs or philosophies. To unlock Lilith’s potential, embrace your unique worldview while staying open to other perspectives, avoiding dogmatism in your rebellion.

10th House: Lilith in the 10th house pushes you to challenge authority or traditional career paths, seeking freedom in your professional life. Use this energy to carve out a career that allows your individuality to shine, but be mindful of rebelling against authority without cause.

11th House: You are deeply focused on social causes and collective progress, often acting as a visionary or rebel in group settings. To use Lilith’s energy, contribute your innovative ideas to collective goals, but avoid distancing yourself from personal relationships within the group.

12th House: Lilith in the 12th house brings hidden desires for freedom and independence, often leading you to explore spiritual or psychological realms in unconventional ways. Use this energy to explore your inner world, but be mindful not to isolate yourself emotionally or reject vulnerability in the process.

𝐏𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐋𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐡

With Lilith in Pisces, your power lies in your profound intuition, imagination, and connection to the mystical or spiritual realms. You have a natural ability to tap into the unseen, often feeling drawn to creative, spiritual, or healing pursuits. Lilith in Pisces amplifies your sensitivity and desire for transcendence, but it also brings challenges related to boundaries, escapism, and the fear of losing yourself in others or in fantasy. You may find yourself in situations where you sacrifice too much of yourself or become overly idealistic, blurring the line between reality and illusion. Your true power comes from embracing your intuition while establishing healthy boundaries to protect your energy.

Shadow work with Lilith in Pisces involves confronting tendencies to avoid reality, whether through fantasy, substances, or emotional withdrawal. You may need to address your fear of confrontation or a tendency to play the victim or martyr in relationships. To unlock Lilith’s potential, balance your spiritual and emotional sensitivity with practical, grounded action. When you integrate your intuitive gifts with a strong sense of self, you become a powerful healer, artist, or guide, helping others navigate the deeper currents of life.

Through the Houses:

1st House: You project an ethereal, sensitive, and compassionate presence, often blurring the lines between yourself and others. To unleash Lilith’s power, embrace your intuitive nature while establishing boundaries that protect your individuality.

2nd House: Your approach to material security may be marked by idealism or spirituality. Use Lilith’s energy to create financial stability through creative or healing work, but avoid escaping into fantasy when faced with practical challenges.

3rd House: You communicate with empathy and sensitivity, often intuitively understanding others’ thoughts and feelings. Use Lilith’s power to express your creative and spiritual insights, but avoid losing clarity or becoming vague in communication.

4th House: You may feel emotionally connected to your home and family, sometimes sacrificing your needs for the sake of others. Use Lilith’s energy to create a nurturing home while setting boundaries to protect your emotional well-being.

5th House: Creativity and romance are where you seek emotional connection and transcendence, often idealizing love or artistic pursuits. To fully express Lilith’s power, embrace your artistic or romantic visions while staying grounded to avoid disillusionment.

6th House: In work and daily routines, you are drawn to healing or spiritual practices but may struggle with boundaries. Use Lilith’s energy to serve others meaningfully, while ensuring you don’t neglect your needs or avoid responsibilities.

7th House: Relationships may feel deeply spiritual or idealistic, but you might struggle with boundaries or losing yourself in partnerships. To harness Lilith’s energy, seek emotional connection balanced with individual autonomy, avoiding the role of martyr.

8th House: You are drawn to the mystical and transformative aspects of life, seeking emotional or spiritual depth in intimate relationships. Use Lilith’s power to navigate intense emotional experiences, but avoid escaping into fantasy or obsession.

9th House: Your spiritual and philosophical beliefs may be highly idealistic, and you may seek higher truths or mystical experiences. To unlock Lilith’s potential, pursue your spiritual quest while staying grounded, avoiding dogmatic or escapist tendencies.

10th House: Lilith in the 10th house may lead you to seek recognition for your creative or spiritual talents, possibly pursuing a career in healing, art, or spirituality. Use this energy to build a career aligned with your values, but avoid disillusionment from unrealistic expectations.

11th House: You are drawn to idealistic social causes or communities, seeking connection with like-minded individuals in spiritual or creative groups. Use Lilith’s energy to contribute compassionately to collective goals, but be careful not to lose yourself in the group.

12th House: Lilith in the 12th house amplifies your connection to the unconscious and spiritual realms, often drawing you to deep mystical experiences. Use this energy for self-reflection and spiritual practices, but be cautious of retreating into isolation or escaping from reality.

Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)

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sorryimananti-romantic · 2 months ago

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angel!mafia seonghwa x chemist!mafia reader

evil man possessed by an angel who falls in love with the evil chemist who is basically a devil au LOL

genres and warnings: angst, suggestive, mafia au, obsession, morally black ppl again, mentions of drugs, human experiments (a few details), violence, blood, themes of corruption and forbidden love, lmk if i missed anything, dni if uncomfortable ^

word count: 32k (oops i did it again)

synopsis: when you summon an angel to enhance the town's drugs, the angel ends up being stuck in seonghwa's body- the mafia boss who supplies the drugs itself. the line between good and evil start to blur, complicated by your feelings for each other which lead you to make some difficult choices.

manager-nim: @eightmakesonebraincell (she insisted hwa pure evil i said your wish is my command)

Good and evil must coexist in order to survive.

Without evil, there cannot be any good in this world. Evilness creates the need for good. And if there’s only good in the world, there would be no reason or purpose anymore. There must be evil for there to be a desire for goodness.

Good and evil are the two elements that weigh down the pans of a weighing scale. They hover in the air, tipping up and down endlessly, never balancing because there is always too much evil or too much good at each fraction of time in the world. Perhaps, it is meant to be that way- perhaps, that is the balance this world needs.

Similarly, there is also good and evil coexisting in an individual. Sometimes, there is more good than evil, while other times evil outweighs the good . People can argue if humans are inherently good or evil but it has never mattered- if you live in society, you will learn what is considered good and what is considered evil.

However… sometimes when you look at Park Seonghwa, you wonder if all the foolish rambling about evil being an inherent trait might be true after all. You’ve known him almost all your life and you are convinced that the man does not possess a single good bone in his body.

Again, it was arguable. What is the criteria of being good or what ultimately labels you evil? Perhaps, he is good in an unconventional way- though there’s hardly been evidence of that when all his good intentions have an evil motive. Maybe that was his purpose on earth- to make sure the scale does not tip too much towards good.

A tiny part of you thought that maybe he was the only person holding the burden of that responsibility- but then you would look in the mirror and realise you were no better. You would scoff at the audacity to judge the poor man when you yourself were his equal in every way. Perhaps, you possessed a few morals, but you had always been reprimanded on that.

You could not be a good human in your field. Not when you were making sure that the society was entangled in the web of your deception- attracted like flies to the things that glittered like gold but were dark at their very core. Not when you fed the people with the lies of pleasure and they willingly took bait, losing the conscious part of themselves that would ever warn them that maybe this was not a good idea.

Not when you were the devil who was ruling both the underworld and the world from the shadows.

You did not need to be a good human when you were manufacturing and producing drugs. You just needed to possess a brain that functioned better than the average human, possess a heart that did not function as good as the average human, and finally, stay away from whatever you created.

Bonus points if you had a little streak of-

“This is insanity, sweetheart.”

That. Insanity. The key ingredient.

“But insanity has always made sense. Especially when it comes from me,” you pointed out and Seonghwa couldn’t help but agree, uncomfortably crossing his legs while sitting on his office chair and contemplating deeply.

“Theoretically, it can work-”

“Theoretically,” Seonghwa reminded you with a pointed glare that was a warning to not get too ahead of yourself. He never failed to assert that he was ultimately the one in control. “Theoretically, anything is possible. But if you really believe that angels exist-”

“I don’t have to believe that they do,” you insisted. “But I have to try.”

You were unsure about this, that was true. Summoning demons for ritual was something common in the underworld, though you had never witnessed it yourself, having heard that it was better to avoid that. You had suppliers, though, claiming that they had stored the ‘essence’ of the demons that they summoned. The essence was a powerful thing and had to be mixed in miniscule quantities in large amounts of the base product for it to work- you learned that the hard way too. It took you years and an uncountable amount of dead test subjects to learn that the human body could not tolerate the essence of a demon unless it was barely there.

Did you believe that demons exist after all these experimentations? It was still arguable, but the vials of the essence stored safely in your lab was proof that the world was not only home to humans and animals, but other creatures too. You recalled observing exorcisms when you first started studying dark arts, hoping to expand your knowledge and mix the scientific and the supernatural. You once convinced the mafia lord to join you.

That sure did end well. Here you were, seated right in front of that mafia lord, trying to convince him that if humans could successfully extract demonic essence to create the ultimate drugs, they could extract the essence of an angel to create something new too.

It could change the course of this world, if you were right. You had no idea if the essence would work like the demonic one. Maybe it worked similarly, but at least you would have the satisfaction of having tried. There was a chance though that the angelic essence could open new opportunities for your business. And if it had medicinal properties, you could control the capitalistic net too. You could rule the world.

“Come on,” you insisted, getting up and walking around the table to lean against the surface, bending down just a fraction to meet his eyes. “This could be our salvation, Seonghwa.”

“Or doom,” he challenged, leaning forward while still seated, his fingers going to play with the lapel of your coat. “This could go very, very wrong. I can’t lose my mad scientist now, can I?”

You smirked. “Is that all I mean to you? Mad scientist?”

“You know what they say,” Seonghwa shrugged. “Behind every drug lord is a mad scientist.”

“They don’t say that, but sure,” you scoffed. “Come on. We’ve been partners for years now. Give me some credit, and let me try this. I’ll only try it once, I promise. If it doesn’t work, we let it go.”

Seonghwa considered your proposal- he always let you try stupidly dangerous things at least once, no matter the fear in his heart that he would end up endangering your life. He told himself he did not care for you, but that you were simply someone essential to him and his business. He convinced himself that he had no attachment towards you as someone who grew up with you and survived with you in the darkest period of his life.

And you believed him. That he really did not have any personal attachment towards you. You were just someone useful to him. You always said that you returned the sentiment, but you were more human than him in some ways, and being human meant that you inevitably caught feelings for him.

Not that you would ever admit that to a soul. They could pin you on the very stretcher you tied your test subjects to, cut you open or drug you but nothing could be capable of extracting that confession out of your mouth.

It didn’t help that the person in question was the Park Seonghwa. He could look like an angel and a demon at the same time, and that was perhaps the worst combination you could have encountered. It was his ability to transform his face into the epitome of innocence that was his weapon. He had bewitched every person that possessed any semblance of power, took advantage of any individual that could be of use to him, whether alive or dead, and climbed his way to the top.

And you had been by his side all along. Partner in every sense, sharing brains and planning schemes in the dead of the night, alone in the woods huddled against each other because you had a single blanket that you managed to grab when you both ran away from the orphanage. He was too busy leading the path to worry about grabbing anything useful, he told you.

You had been by his side all the years that you spent after, being protected by him when he teamed up with the street gangs and earned for both of you. You helped wherever you could, his little mad scientist from the beginning, experimenting with drugs and burying your nose in books, observing the doctors and surgeons who were expert on cutting up people to extract organs, learning every practical skill you needed to stand on your feet and make Seonghwa proud.

And you did. You made him proud and you made him strong. You cut ties- in the most literal way- with your previous gang and emerged as a strong duo, Seonghwa operating in the light while you worked in the shadows. He kept you close, within an arm’s length. He made sure you had everything you needed- a roof over your head, food in your stomach, a lab for your experiments, and him.

You were too afraid to ask him if he would treat you the same had you not excelled in this knowledge. You already knew the answer to that. That man possessed no human heart, and the moment you would be useless, he would stab you not in the back but in the front, locking eyes with you and proving that ultimately, it was him in charge. It was why you never risked saying or doing something stupid, because you were content this way.

You were content with the way his fingers travelled up the lapel of your black coat, finding the skin on your chest just below your neck where the shirt stopped him. You were content with the way he traced patterns there as he weighed the pros and cons of trying this damned ritual. Him locking his eyes with you and holding no hint of remorse that was otherwise a permanent expression in his eyes was enough. The squeeze of his fingers around your neck was enough.

And whatever his decision was… it would be enough too.

“Alright. Just once. It should not go wrong, you understand?”

You failed to stifle your smile, soon grinning and Seonghwa chuckled at the way your eyes so dangerously twinkled.

“A devil about to summon an angel. Who would’ve thought?”

“Two devils,” you corrected. “You’re coming with me.”

“Oh, no, no,” Seonghwa shook his head adamantly. “I trust you. I’ll send men-”

“No, you need to witness this moment, Seonghwa,” you insisted in all seriousness, your eyes widening just a fraction. “If it’s a success, we will change the world. You need to be there. For me.”

Seonghwa thought he heard just a bit of an underlying threat in there but he chose to ignore it, like he always did. Only you could talk to him in this tone, demand anything- even his life from him. He had already given you all his life, like you had given him all yours.

He could give you this, too. It made sense- and he really needed to witness this one himself, otherwise if it worked, he was positive he would never believe that they weren’t manipulating facts.

“For you,” Seonghwa nodded. “Make sure it’s safe, and have some human offerings ready in case we need that.”

“I don’t think an angel would be interested, but sure,” you gently pushed his hand that was playing with your hair away. “I’ll have everything ready- we’re doing it exactly a week from now. May the Lord be with us.”

Seonghwa’s cackle roared in the room as you exited. You felt like you were floating in the clouds, now that you had his approval.

You would prove that angels exist, hence proving there was good in this world.

And then you would wonder where the good in your old friend’s heart went.

“More candles?” One of the men helping you with the summoning ritual asked.

You looked around the room before turning your attention back to the book you had borrowed from one of your crew members in charge of collecting demonic essence. He was under the impression that you were trying a different demon summoning ritual, and you intended to keep it that way- not everyone needed to know that it was an angel you would be summoning.

“It’s not a fucking birthday party, those are enough candles,” you said and when Seonghwa snickered under his breath, the man skittered away.

“Someone’s on edge,” Seonghwa elbowed you lightly and you looked at him helplessly.

“I’m just trying to make sure this won’t be unsafe even if it goes wrong. The candles are just for aesthetics.”

“Ah, is that so?” Seonghwa looked around. “And the circle they’re sketching? Will that serve as a cage?”

“The spell and the items I’ll place around the room will serve as the cage, the circle is just a location pointer, you could say,” you explained, shutting the book and taking a deep breath. “I’m going to make a final check. Can you ask everyone to get out of this room and wait?”

“Will you really be here when they summon the angel?” He asked and you nodded. “Do you have to be?”

“Yes, I have to be,” you told him for the umpteenth time, beckoning him to go away. “I’ll be safe, don’t worry. And if anything bad happens… it’s not like you care anyway.”

Seonghwa narrowed his eyes at you and you grinned- you had a habit of making these jabs and he was quite used to that now.

“I’ll keep your word for it,” he promised. “If anything bad happens, don’t expect me to come barging in to save you.”

“Got it,” you sighed, putting on a show of offence. “If I die tonight, it was me who stole your precious diamond ring.”

“I know,” Seonghwa smirked and you stared at him, slack-jawed. He only shook his head and turned away, clapping to get everyone’s attention and asking anyone who wasn’t conducting the ritual to leave the room.

The room fell silent once again, the hushed voices of the people present inside echoing off the walls. You weren’t sure if the chilly feel to the room was because it was in the basement of an abandoned building in a very remote area, or because of the deed that was about to take place.

You waited until everyone had left before taking your position at the far end of the room. Your partner’s crew members naturally knew what to do as if they had trained for this their whole lives. They set the holy items at the four corners, and then some unholy ones at the other four corners, creating an eight-pointed star. Once you were satisfied, you went to pick a holy sword- the sword you had earned after your contribution to the dark arts, the very sword that had given you the idea of summoning an angel.

You dipped it into the tub near you, collecting wine on its blade, its translucent drops marking the earth with evidence of the forthcoming act. You turned your neck to look at the window, finding Seonghwa and the others- human sacrifices- waiting. Seonghwa shared a nod and you fished out his lighter from the pocket.

Once the sword caught fire, you walked with heavy steps to your final position in the front so the angel would meet your eyes. You put on your shades for caution like the rest of them did, and then you signalled the summoner to begin.

The sound of his spell filled the room- it sounded foreign even to him, considering the way he stumbled upon the words- the words for this spell were different from a demonic spell. The summoner sliced his palm and let his blood taint the etchings on the floor, continuing muttering the spell.

For a moment, you wondered if it was all a waste as seconds ticked by without a movement but a collective gasp sounded across the room when the flames of the candles blazed angrily. You gripped the hilt of the sword tightly, keeping it raised in the air. You tried not to let the fear gripping your heart get to you as the temperature in the room dropped significantly.

When the summoner said the final words of the spell, the final call to have any angel in the vicinity answer him, a strong breeze circulated around the room, blowing out every candle and almost extinguishing the fire on the sword. You gulped to swallow the scream forming in your throat, the sword in your hand the only source of light now. You thought you heard someone knocking at the window but the little glimmer of light in the centre of the circle had caught your attention.

Slowly, the glimmer turned into a blob, which then turned into a shapeless source of light- blinding golden light so bright that it appeared white, harsh enough to make your eyes water even through the shades. You narrowed your eyes to focus but there was too much going on-

Especially the warning song echoing inside you- you knew that it wasn’t coming from you. It was coming from that being and everyone else in the room could hear it too, considering how they started backing away.

“Stand your ground,” you ordered, and the men stilled. Your word was as important as their boss Seonghwa’s, perhaps even more important than their own life. “Make sure the barricade remains intact.”

It was only then you spared yourself a moment to meet Seonghwa’s eyes through the window, who looked astonished, his eyes wide as he tried to comprehend the glorious sight in front of him.

The glorious sight that was now taking the shape of a person, the edges sharpening enough to make out its silhouette yet remaining blurry. It seemed to be a crouched figure, taller than anyone you had ever seen, a cascade of hair covering the entirety of its upper body and anything that was not covered by its folded wings. There was no need for a halo when the being glowed from within, though even if there was one, it was too blindingly bright to make out.

“Which little bird summoned this weary angel? Pray tell, pray tell...”

Oh, you were doomed.

“Was it the man that connected us with blood? Was it the man that offered me good, or was it the one that chained me with the bad? Pray tell, pray tell…”

The said men were now leaning against the walls, praying to whatever god that had sent his angel here to save them. Save them from what? It was too late-

“Or is it the little bird that holds the key to my freedom?”

Key to freedom? You looked down at the lit sword. You recalled reading something about how such a holy relic could also be used to undo spells and though you had thought the information was insignificant, you were wondering if you needed to undo the spell right now-

“What purpose must I serve to earn my freedom?”

The tone of the angel turned soft, almost beckoning you forward. You weren’t sure if the angel was speaking out loud or if the voice was still inside your head. You dared to take one step closer before you felt a crushing sense of weight on your shoulders.

“It is I who called you,” you managed to say. “I have questions to ask.”

“You called me to satisfy your humane curiosity?”

There was a warning in his soft voice now. A warning that one wrong move would ensure your end. You looked helplessly at Seonghwa who was no longer present at the window and you wondered where he was. You thought you heard the creak of a door open but he wouldn’t be stupid enough to come inside, right?

You contemplated making a deal with the angel, but your tongue fell limp. With demons, you had heard that it was pretty easy when it wasn’t one of the stronger demons. A little deal, some nasty business, ensuring their essence would do damage that they would like, or in rare cases, a price to be paid usually got the work done.

What could you offer the servant of God? What could an angel need?

“Do I really hold the key to your freedom?” You asked, a strange tugging in your mind. The angel lifted its face just a fraction- you still couldn’t make out its features but you could tell that it was staring at you.

“I have a feeling that you do.”

And you had a feeling that this wasn’t about the freedom from this spell anymore. Entranced, you took another step forward, and another, unable to deny the pull. The being was ethereal and you had no chance against it. You had no chance, and you had no choice but to step inside the circle with this sword, damned be the consequences, damned be the very familiar voice shouting at you to stop-

It all happened too quickly to process- you were suddenly and forcefully being pulled away and the angel latched out, the sword falling on the ground with a dreadful clatter that echoed in the air, intermingled with the shrieks of the people present in the room. Your eyes widened when you noticed the tip of the sword within the circle.

This was the end.

“Get out of here, now!” Seonghwa ordered through gritted teeth in your ear, pulling you away with him and you went along this time, trying to tell him that it was too late, that he shouldn’t have come inside.

He would later wonder why he went inside. Perhaps, the angel himself had called him. Perhaps, he had been attracted to the angel’s pure energy when he was the embodiment of darkness himself.

And if that was the case, why did the angel choose him as his medium of freedom?

The last thing you saw from the corner of your eye before you lost consciousness, amidst the chaos of the summoning ritual gone wrong, was the angel’s hand latching onto Seonghwa’s back and Seonghwa’s eyes rolling back in his head before he fell, dragging you down with him.

All these years of your life had been dedicated to the mafia boss Seonghwa- your friend, your family, and your everything. Even your worst nightmare.

He was the reason you were alive and not sold off as nothing more than a repository of useful organs. If you ever think back to what your life had been like when you were just a child, barely 10, it was rough. It was dark, and Seonghwa was the only light in your life. No matter how dim that might be.

Seonghwa always shined. And you were just a moth attracted to his light.

However, you did not expect the man to physically shine. There was a sheen of actual golden light across his skin as his body burned with a fever meant for no human. You had bitten through the majority of your thumb nail while you wracked your brains for a solution- but did you really want one?

All these years, you had put Seonghwa’s ambitions and goals first. He wanted to escape the abusive orphanage and he wanted you to come along- you couldn’t be more grateful. He wanted to mix with the street gangs and provide for you so you could make a breakthrough in science (specifically, drugs) one day- sure, who were you to deny that blessing? He wanted to become the most notorious mafia boss, earn a social repute and keep you by his side, wanting you to help him become a true drug lord- to be the owner of the most unique and sought after drug. That aligned with your personal ambitions, so who were you to say no?

But your actual goal- if you ever had a moment of clarity without Seonghwa clouding your thoughts, it was to make a breakthrough in science- not just drugs. And Seonghwa knew your heart’s deepest desire, which was why he always prevented you from doing so, warning that you couldn’t be in the public eye. If you wanted to make breakthroughs, you could do so in the field of drugs, and limit yourself to the underworld.

Well, this was what he wanted. Here he was, burning with an inhumane fever, golden ichor dripping from the corner of his eyes that you were sure to collect, already a few vials full. You wondered if this was the essence. And you wondered if the angel really was inside Seonghwa’s body now.

The two of you had lost consciousness when the angel attacked you- thankfully, his loyal servants were quick to take you both back to your hide-out where your lab was located. When you opened your eyes, you found yourself and Seonghwa lying flat on the stretchers. For a moment, fear gripped the entirety of your being before you realised you were just laying down and not tied like one of your test subjects. A sigh of relief later, you turned to find Seonghwa tied, and for all the right reasons.

Thankfully, your subordinate was someone who could be trusted. He made sure to keep the rest of your staff outside and waited for you to wake up. Now the two of you were almost huddled against each other, fidgeting with your clothes and biting your nails- anything to cope, at this point.

“Do you think he will ever wake up?” Dr. Choi asked, his sharp features softening into worry. “Or will he… burn to death from within?”

“I hope he doesn’t,” you nodded slowly. “If he wakes up and remains alright… he will be my greatest product.”

Dr. Choi San chuckled darkly at that comment. “It will only be your greatest product if you let the world see it.”

“That’s the thing,” you looked at your thumb, finding it smeared with your trademark cherry red lipstick. “I would want to keep him all to myself.”

“What a dilemma, huh?” He shook his head. “Well, I for one don’t want to be present when the demon lord wakes up. I’ll be outside if you need me.”

“What if the angel inside him kills me?”

“Well…” Dr. Choi shrugged. “I guess I’ll proceed to take over this institution like you have willed-”

“Not helping,” you glared at him but you both knew that this was a situation you couldn’t do anything about. You were helpless, and your only choice was to wait and hope that Seonghwa would be okay and the angel wouldn’t want to kill you at the first sight.

Another hour must have passed with you waiting endlessly, wiping the sweat off his skin and collecting the tears before he finally opened his eyes, groaning inhumanely and beginning to shiver slightly. You rushed to his side, startled at the sudden shift and poked his side.

“Seonghwa? Is that you?”

“What’s happening to me?” His voice came out strained and before he could ask something else or get your response, his eyes rolled back and he shut them tight, finally settling down and laying limp. Your heart sank and you checked if he was breathing, feeling relieved upon finding that he was. You contemplated untying his wrists and legs but you had to play it safe-

Though you were pretty sure the angel would be able to break free anyway.

When Seonghwa opened his eyes the second time, there was a slight glaze to it as if he was wondering where he was or recalling the events of the previous night. He tried raising his arms but gave up instantly, not even bothering to check why he was unable to do so. You frowned at his unusual behaviour and cautiously called his name again.

“Where am I?”

“My lab? You passed out, remember?” You gently told him.

“No, where am I?” He looked at you, his eyes scanning your face as if this was the first time he was seeing you. “And who are you?”

You felt your knees go weak and you clutched at his stretcher. “Seonghwa? It’s me, y/n. Don’t you remember?”

Seonghwa tried to raise his arms again but he shut his eyes as he groaned. “Untie me. Now.”

You couldn’t say no to that. You unclasped the belts and he sat up, swaying a bit. You passed him a glass of water and he made a face, setting it aside.

“Why did you call me?”

“I was trying to wake you up-”

“No, why did you call me?”

This time, his voice sounded inside you and you took a step back, your lower lip trembling at the shift in his demeanour.

“It’s- it’s not you, is it? You’re not Seonghwa?”

“I’m not your rotten excuse of a human, correct.”

It was the angel inside him speaking. He raised his hands, examining them carefully, finding them rough and calloused. He looked sideways, finding a blurry reflection of himself and shook his head in disappointment.

“Who are you?” You dared to ask.

“You called me,” he said calmly, a dangerous undertone in his voice. “You know exactly who I am. You know my name- do not dare to call me by my name with your filthy human tongue.”

You blinked, narrowing your eyes. “Is an angel allowed to talk like that?”

“Well, I’m human now, aren’t I?” The angel shrugged carelessly, wiping the sweat off his forehead with his sleeve. “Thanks to you.”

“I’m not the one who asked you to possess him. That wasn’t my idea,” you tried to explain, sweat oozing out of your pores the more his glare turned darker.

“Well, what was your idea, then?” He got up, a bit shaky on his feet as if walking after a long time. That didn’t stop him from invading your personal space and standing right in front of you until you could feel the warmth radiate from his body. His brows furrowed and you thought he looked incredibly sad at that moment.

“What were you thinking, little bird? Trapping an angel?”

“I-” you clutched at the table behind you, swallowing the lump in your throat. “I only wanted to ask if an angel’s essence could be obtained.”

“For what?”

“Medicinal purposes,” you smoothly lied.

“Well, you have your answer,” the angel looked towards the vials as if having sensed them. “Though I’m sure it will not work. And you won’t be getting any more of my tears. I shall leave this body soon- if only this cursed human would let me-”

“What do you mean?” Your voice came out small, and you hated the effect he had on you. You weren’t sure if it was the angel, or if it was Seonghwa that made you still cower under him.

“I shouldn’t have been able to possess such an evil human,” the angel tilted his head threateningly as he leaned towards you, scanning your face. “You were who I intended to possess. Maybe he had a change of heart and allowed me to take him?”

“He wouldn’t do that,” you muttered. The Park Seonghwa you knew would never risk his life for you.

Okay, he might, a little. To the point of getting hurt, but not to the point of… this.

“Doesn’t matter. I’m stuck, and I’m unable to get out.”

“Do we need to do another… ritual?”

“Humans,” he spat with such bitterness that you almost wondered if this was Seonghwa himself, testing you. “You should have learned about this properly before you summoned me.”

“Do you know why you’re unable to get out of this body?” You asked.

The room fell silent, and when a subtle shake of his head told you that he indeed was as clueless as you, you finally relaxed and let a smirk grace your lips.

“Well… it looks like you and I are going to have some fun then… angel.”

It didn’t take long for you to convince the angel that you needed to run some tests in order to see if Seonghwa was okay- but you used this excuse to extract some blood, run every test possible, take every scan and monitor his vitals. Hours later, you were still stuck in the lab with him, the smell of food and antiseptics filling the room.

“You have to eat,” you said for perhaps the tenth time. “You’re in a human body, and you will have to live like a human while you’re stuck.”

“I could choose not to eat and let this body die. Maybe that is how I can get out,” the angel considered. You shot him a glare- while the angel wasn’t the considerate creature you thought he would be, his tone was a lot softer than Seonghwa’s ever was.

“Or maybe that’s how you end up perishing,” you placed a piece of meat on top of his rice bowl. “Food for thought.”

The angel glared at you for a moment and fumbled with the chopsticks until you showed him how to use them. He caught up pretty quickly and picked the piece of meat, sniffing it and frowning. You watched him curiously as he stuck out his tongue to take an experimental lick, and after deciding the taste of the meat wasn’t so bad after all, he finally put it in his mouth and chewed slowly.

“I can’t remember the last time I ate,” he confessed and you urged him to try everything on the table.

“As an angel… you do not eat, right?”

“We don’t need to eat to live,” he confirmed and you nodded. “Sometimes, we are sent as a human to guide another. At the rare times that we have to play along, we get to experience some humane things- like eating.”

“So… you’re telling me that angels walk among us as humans?” You asked cautiously.

“So do demons, and other creatures that your mind can never comprehend,” he said, taking another bite of the food- at least he seemed to be enjoying this human experience. “Humans think they own this world. They are no more than specks in this infinite cosmos.”

You nodded slowly- you were not going to argue with that. You had felt less than a speck when you saw the angel back in the basement.

“Was that your true form, earlier?” You asked.

“If you ever saw my true form, your eyes and your limbs would burn,” he said casually and you made a mental note of that. “We are not the angels that you read about in your books. Even demons- you have seen them. That is not their true form- we take the shape of what the human eyes and mind can try to comprehend.”

“How do you know that I’ve seen them?”

The angel tapped the side of his- Seonghwa’s head. “I know everything about this human now that I’m in this body.”

“Is he really alive in there?”

“He is. I can’t say for how long,” he finished eating. “He is fighting for dominance. Perhaps, he might be able to take over after some struggle, but I will remain inside until we find a way to let me out.”

“You should know if there’s a prayer or ritual for that, right?” You asked.

“Hmm… let’s see. Would you like for your human to die? For you and your entire group to perish from the face of the Earth?”

“Of course not,” you narrowed your eyes. Was the angel trying to intimidate you, or was he serious?

“Then I suggest we do not tell the world that this poor angel is stuck in a human. May the Lord help us.”

“Your Lord must know, though. Will he help us?” You asked and the angel chuckled darkly.

“We’re just two pieces in his game of chess now.”

A shiver ran down your spine and you got up to clear the table. “Well, it’s late now. I suggest we pause the game and get some sleep then?”

“Sleep is for the humans-”

“And you are a human now,” you let out a frustrated sigh. “I don’t care if you sleep or not- just come with me.”

You instructed the angel to keep his mouth shut and let you do the talking. You told Dr. Choi to take care of the scans and with that, you both left for the Park Residence, a mansion in the most elite area of the town. You watched the angel look out of the window with curiosity and a hint of amazement- you couldn’t blame him. The mansion was truly something ethereal, especially from the outside with its white corinthian columns and stained glass windows.

“Someone like this human should have been living in the dungeons,” the angel whispered and you put a finger to your lips, unable to stifle a grin. “He does not deserve this beautiful palace.”

“He earned it through his blood, sweat and my tears. Give him some credit.”

“Who are you to this human?” He asked as you got out of the car. The secretaries welcomed the two of you and you dismissed them for the night.

“Can’t you tell?” You asked, tapping the side of your head like he had earlier.

“I can only see the memories. I cannot comprehend his emotions or feelings.”

“Do you not feel?” You asked, entering the mansion and being welcomed with the subtle warm lighting of the chandelier- dimmed for the nighttime- that reflected on the polished white marble. The subtle veins of gold running through the floor reminded you of the angel’s tears. You glanced at him and he hummed.

“This is a nice house.”

“See? You felt that it’s a nice house,” you pointed out.

“No, I can tell that it is a nice house because I can appreciate its craft,” he walked towards the staircase, fingers softly caressing the golden railing and its sleek curves.

“So you cannot feel human emotions? Sadness, happiness… love, hatred, anger?”

“And who said those are human emotions?” He asked, leaving you speechless. You followed him upstairs, letting him navigate through the empty corridor- if he had Seonghwa’s memories, he probably knew where to go.

“Humans possess the same attributes as angels and demons,” the angel explained. “Inherently, these attributes are innocent in nature but as a human lives and learns, they take a shape and become uniquely human. No human is angelic enough, nor demonic enough- though… this one might take the crown for being the most demonic.”

“There are worse humans, trust me. At least this one possesses some morals,” you muttered.

“And how do you weigh your morals? What is your scale to weigh them, human?” He asked and you shrugged- he was right. You couldn’t be the judge of that when your own morals were skewed.

“Well, you did see some good in me, didn’t you? When you were about to possess me?”

“You were the only good option, do not think of yourself too highly,” he almost reprimanded and your shoulders sagged in disappointment. He looked at you for confirmation before reaching the last room at the left section of the upper floor and you nodded. Once he entered the room, he looked around carefully.

The room was… lifeless, to put it simply. For starters, Seonghwa was meticulously neat and far too organised. There wasn’t a single thing in his room that was out of place, and the housekeepers made sure to maintain that as well. The pillows on his king-sized bed were neatly stacked. The monochrome aesthetic of his room with a hint of gold surprisingly both fit the aesthetic of the house and felt a bit odd. There was only an abstract monochrome painting with a splash of colours on one wall, and that was it.

“Well, this is where you will sleep- or try to,” you said, taking a seat on the grey couch that was far too comfortable and often somewhere you lounged when you invaded Seonghwa’s personal space. “And this is where I will watch you sleep.”

The angel regarded you with suspicion. “You will kill me in my sleep.”

“You’re far too valuable for me to kill, don’t worry,” you assured him and the angel felt an odd sense of comfort, though he questioned the reasons behind that. “I’m a doctor, so you can rest assured that I won’t let anything happen.”

“Are you not a shame to the medical community?” The angel candidly wondered out loud and you felt a pang of hurt.

“I won’t be when I’m done making use of your essence,” you promised bitterly. “Besides, I’m not your conventional doctor. I’m better than that.”

“You cut up humans to learn medicine. You are the worst kind.”

“And what is your scale to measure my morals?” You questioned, just a tiny bit of the pent up rage leaking in your voice. “Are you sure your scale is the right one, angel?”

The angel smirked- smirked at that, looking too much like the mafia lord in that instance. You released a short breath and got comfortable on the couch, unlocking your phone to check the updates. You paid no mind to the angel looking around and messing the room up until he got exhausted and lied down on the bed, staring at the ceiling.

“I wish to return to the realms of the angels,” he whispered softly as sleep overpowered his consciousness. You looked up and watched his eyes flutter close, his breathing steady.

The angel was asleep. All you had to do was wait for the morning now.

“Fucking… bastard, thinks he is something to take control of me!”

The sound of two books colliding against each other with a thump, and the pent up sigh of frustration.

“Someone is going to die by my hands, and this fucking angel will be responsible for it-”

A smash- or perhaps, it felt like a smash because of the pounding in your head. You yawned unceremoniously, wiping your mouth and rubbing your eyes as you looked around-

You were in Seonghwa’s room- Seonghwa, who was now shirtless and sweating with anger, his upper body almost heaving with breathlessness. The muscles on his body seemed more pronounced and his veins were popping out. You considered pretending to go right back to sleep- maybe you could disappear into the couch if you stayed here long enough-

“You.”

“Hold up-” you raised your hand but when he started taking big steps towards you, you swallowed the scream that built in your throat and got up. Unfortunately, there was no way to get out of here and if you dared jump on Seonghwa’s freshly made bed (man was organising the mess the angel had made out of his room in his absence), the chances of him letting you live would lower exponentially. However, desperate times call for desperate measures and you slid under his arm to jump over his bed, making him curse some more under his breath.

He was quick, though. In a matter of seconds, he had you pinned against the wall, his arm splayed across your neck to hold you in place and you grimaced.

“What have you done, y/n?” He asked through gritted teeth.

“You’re back, though, right?” You asked. “This is a good sign-”

“The angel is still inside- I can feel him here,” Seonghwa dug his finger into his temple. You couldn’t meet his eyes, so you let them lower until they fixated on the big tattoo on his neck. MATZ, a reminder of what he had lost.

“Alright, let me go,” you demanded gently. “And we can talk like two civilised beings.”

“What will you do about this, huh?” Seonghwa asked, no longer simmering with rage but unmoving with his position.

“Why did you come inside the room during the ritual?” You questioned, awfully curious of the reason. “You heard the angel, right? The angel didn’t mean to possess you- I was his target. Why did you interfere, Seonghwa?”

Seonghwa glared at you for a good few moments as if the answer to your question could be found in your eyes. However, there was no answer, and he let go of you. You took a deep breath, rubbing the soreness out of your collarbones.

“How are you feeling?” You asked. “Notice anything different?”

“Just a bit feverish, that’s all,” he admitted and you made note of that. “Find a way to undo this as soon as possible.”

“Already on it, don’t worry. I don’t like these turns of events. But… I’m also going to check the properties of the essence I managed to retrieve, and if I’m in need of more…”

“Get the angel out of my body,” he ordered, pronouncing every word threateningly.

“Got it,” you said in dismissal. If the angel’s essence was something of value… you would wring the angel dry before you would ever let him go. However, Seonghwa did not need to know that. You meekly smiled before walking towards his bed and smoothening the sheets. “What are you going to do?”

“Work,” he responded, “I’ve got a few meetings to attend and a few politicians to bribe.”

“How wonderful,” you commented. “Want me to come along?”

“I can handle it-”

“What if the angel… comes back?” You asked and Seonghwa paused in the middle of buttoning his black shirt. “Are you sure you can handle the consequences?”

For once, Seonghwa was silent and you sat on the edge of his bed, smirking. “I think I should stick with you until we’re sure the angel won’t take over randomly, at least. In case I see the angel is back, I can do most of the talking and make the angel shut up.”

“Why are you so sure that the angel won’t jeopardise my reputation?”

“Because, Seonghwa dear,” you got up and walked to him, buttoning the rest of his shirt and patting his chest. “I can end up killing him, and you in the process. The angel knows I’m capable of that.”

“I know you’re capable of that too,” Seonghwa said in a low voice, peering down at you. “Question is… will you?”

“Stay curious about that,” you told him with a smile, pressing on his chin affectionately like you always did. Seonghwa scoffed though he couldn’t help but break into a smile as well. You told him you would join him downstairs for breakfast and went to get ready.

Once in the privacy of your room, you took a deep breath, thinking and planning for what was next. There was absolutely no way you were going to leave Seonghwa alone. He was stuck with you and would have to remain under your supervision until this matter was sorted. It wouldn’t be unusual to tag along to his meetings and visits- you were his partner, and you were often present alongside him, but you were also a very busy person who was more occupied with lab work.

The lab wasn’t far from here, and while you trusted Dr. Choi, you never trusted anyone enough. You were going to monitor his progress and work with him too. You needed to see the composition of the angel’s tears and experiment with it- but when?

You looked in the mirror, the bags under your eyes more prominent and your cheeks looking sunken. You sighed deeply- it looked like you would be sacrificing your sleep quite a lot now.

And if sacrificing your sleep meant you would be basking in Seonghwa’s presence? So be it. That’s all you ever wanted anyways.

While Seonghwa was the same old person that he had always been, albeit more distant than ever thanks to the being inside his head that ‘wouldn’t stop whispering to him’, as he claimed. You could not blame the mafia boss for being on edge- apart from the fact that he was running a constant low fever, his senses seemed to be heightened as well. The lights felt too bright to him, the noise was too loud, and you-

You gulped as he flicked the dagger between his fingers effortlessly, contemplating if he wanted to slice you open or slice his own head open to extract the source of the constant whisperings.

“Look, it’s only been a few days, it will get better-”

Yet another dagger thrown at the board behind you, narrowly avoiding your cheekbone but definitely trimming the strands of your hair that were sticking out. You didn’t even flinch this time, but you were losing your patience too.

“Park Seonghwa,” you warned. “If you want me to leave you alone, I will. I won’t be responsible for what happens next. You have a meeting with Assemblyman Hwang later. He’s willing to buy drugs from you, and I know you want that meeting to go smoothly.”

Seonghwa slumped back in his office chair and folded his arms as if feeling cold. “I never said that I want you to leave me alone. But the sight of you… how do I put it…”

“Yeah, I know you hate me for obvious reasons, but technically-”

“Don’t say another word.”

You lowered your finger and zipped your lips. Technically, it was his fault and he knew that, which was the reason why he was so agitated.

Seonghwa and the angel inside him were in a constant battle for dominance of their body. For Seonghwa, there was a motive- it was his body, and the angel was a foreigner. A parasite, almost. You still did not know why the angel wanted to be dominant in this body and take control so badly when all he did once he managed to take over was crouch in a corner, away from the rest of the world. He would barely answer any of your questions and you half-wondered if he wanted to kill himself.

There wasn’t a specific trigger either. Seonghwa would be functioning as normally as a feverish human could- a bit sluggish in his movements but alert nonetheless- and a loud groan of pain later, the angel would take over, finish doing whatever Seonghwa had been doing and go to sulk. You were pretty sure Seonghwa did not need to tell the angel to act like a human- the angel himself did not want to be seen.

Perhaps, that was why he chose the darkest of the corners to hide, away from the light of this world.

The angel must miss the light of his world.

“The meeting is in a few hours,” Seonghwa reminded himself. “And I would like the angel to not take over-”

In some sort of a twisted notion of revenge, or karma, or whatever word you could use to explain the unfortunate luck of the mafia boss, he let out a foreboding painful groan and clutched at his chest, his eyes rolling back before he shut them. You watched with mild interest, shaking your head.

The angel was back.

“Hello, angel baby,” you called, beckoning him to open his eyes. His brown pupils glowed momentarily before he regained focus.

“Do not call me such terms,” the angel commanded and you huffed, rolling your eyes.

“I cannot call you by your name with my ‘filthy human tongue’,” you reminded him and he frowned. “I cannot call you angel, or angel baby- which is my favourite term, by the way. I like the look you have on your face when I call you that-”

The angel was beginning to look weary already and you smiled guiltily.

“What do I call you?”

“I… do not know,” he looked down at his hands, the dagger falling to the table with a clatter when he noticed that it was in his hand. “Did I say that you have a filthy human tongue?”

“Yes? Back when I summoned you in the basement?”

“I must have been very angry. I apologise. You do not have a filthy human tongue.”

You let out a short laugh. “I wasn’t affected by it, don’t worry. You don’t need to apologise, you’re literally an angel.”

“Has your heart been hardened so much that these terms no longer affect you?” The angel asked softly and you licked your lips in thought.

“I don’t know,” you shrugged. “I guess I’m used to hearing things like these.”

“This man cares for you yet hardened your heart to this point,” the angel commented, clasping his hands and watching you with curiosity. “It is interesting what humans say out loud as opposed to the words they choose not to say.”

You narrowed your eyes. “You’re quite talkative today, angel.”

“I suppose I got tired of the solitude- it gave me no answers. You might, though.”

You raised your shoulders to tell him that you were right here and as oblivious to the situation as he himself was.

“Since you’re in a good mood,” you began. “We must talk about some important things. It might help speed up your, uh, departure process.”

“Let’s hear what you have to say,” the angel said, tucking his hair away from his eyes and looking to his left at his reflection, wincing at the sight of Seonghwa’s half-tied hair and glamorous suit.

“Why do you take over this body at random times? I mean, is there a trigger, or do you just say fuck it we ball?”

“What does that mean?” The angel frowned.

“Just… tell me why you took over Seonghwa now, of all the times,” you sighed.

“Because he has an important meeting, and he thinks that he can keep me at bay,” the angel responded, straightening. “I am here to prove that he, in fact, cannot keep me at bay. It is I who chooses to be dominant, whenever I prefer.”

“Well,” you drawled. This was news to you. “If you want to coexist in this body without any drastic consequences, I suggest you not try to mess with Seonghwa, especially when he has something important coming. It’s for the sake of both of you, because I know that he will try something stupid to get you to cooperate, and I would rather make an agreement with you and solve this predicament like civilised people.”

“I will take over whenever I like,” the angel insisted.

“Please?” You pouted and he stared at your doe-eyes with an intensity that made you want to take back your words.

“Fine. I can leave him alone when he has something important, but I do not have to answer why I take over any time else.”

Just like that? You frowned momentarily.

“While we’re at it…” you asked experimentally. “Can you be a sweetheart and come with me to the lab? There’s just a few things I have to check- vitals, bloodwork and such. I won’t ask you to cry and give me your essence, don’t worry.”

“What if I do not want to?” He cocked his head and asked.

“Do you want me to beg again?” You laughed. “Please, come with me. It’s for your sake.”

The angel tightened his lips in thought and nodded just a few seconds later. “Fine.”

“You’re not hard to convince,” you commented as he got up.

“I have no choice but to cooperate.”

“Are you sure that’s the only reason?” You teased, going towards the hatstand and grabbing Seonghwa’s coat, sliding in front of the angel and offering to help him wear it. He gave you a sceptic look before slipping the coat on, a hint of a smile on his lips that you decided not to comment on.

“Angels do not lie,” he said, taking the lead and pretending to be Seonghwa- of which he was an expert now, as if Seonghwa himself was instructing him what to do. You went to the parking lot and asked the driver to take you both to the lab.

“We don’t have much time, so I’ll make this quick,” you whispered once inside the car. The angel nodded and you spent the duration of the trip in silence, the angel watching the world from the tinted window of the car. You almost felt sorry for him in that instance.

Once inside the lab, you greeted Dr. Choi who was writing some formulas on the board.

“I’ve managed to break down the chemical composition of the essence. I’m surprised to see it’s very similar to the demonic essence we managed to acquire two years ago,” he said, watching Seonghwa with caution. “Is that the angel in front of me?”

“Yes,” you put on your reading glasses to skim through his notes. “That was one of the greater demons, right?”

“That’s what they claimed,” Dr. Choi muttered, motioning the angel to sit on one of the chairs. “What’s different is that the angel’s essence is more stable and safer to work with-”

“You will never be able to use an angel’s essence for medicine,” the angel declared casually and you both looked at him. “The existence of angels is supposed to be a mystery. There has never been an instance of an angel leaving a trace in the human world- by trace, I mean physical evidence. With demons, it is different- they have their own realms and rules.”

“We could change that,” you suggested. “This could be the first instance of it in history.”

“As soon as you spread it, and as soon as news of it reaches the realms of the angels, there will be a ‘natural catastrophe’ that will wipe off your existence and mine from the face of this earth.”

You cursed, looking at Dr. Choi who seemed more scared than annoyed, unlike you. You turned to the angel. “How will the angel realm ever know that we are using angelic essence in, say, drugs or medicines?”

“Demons track the consumers of their essence. When you and your evil boss sell demonic drugs, you put a red target on its consumers for the demons to prey on- and they feast on it,” the angel practically spat. “They make sure the consumers- the humans- do their bidding in return. So when you replace that with angelic essence, you will only be making it easier for the angels to find the humans they need to eradicate from this world.”

“Well, isn’t that lovely to hear,” you muttered. “What about experimentation here?”

“Your test subjects are bound to die. Any one of them that makes it out alive would not live long enough- and I told you that you cannot let the angel realm know that I am stuck inside this human. Does your life mean nothing to you?”

You looked at Dr. Choi who got the signal and left the room, saying he had to get dinner anyway. Then you turned towards the angel and walked closer, seating yourself in front of him.

“This is what my life means to me,” your tone was no longer soft. “I’ve worked hard all my life for this moment-”

“But some things are not meant to be,” the angel looked almost sad to inform you of that. “And that is okay.”

You gritted your teeth as you stared at him- how dare he look at you with pity? The rational part of your mind knew that he was absolutely right and that this was a shot in the dark anyway- you could still study the angel’s essence and at least learn something from it. But the emotional part inside you was currently fighting for dominance and for a moment, you felt sorry for Seonghwa- this battle inside him must be what he was going through at every moment.

It was your fault.

“I’ll check your vitals and take your blood,” you muttered, getting up and grabbing a kit. You wore medical gloves, checked his temperature and blood pressure, extracted some blood and ran some quick scans. Everything seemed normal and at least that was a relief.

When you finished and took off your gloves, you said that you were going to check his pulse and moved to grab his wrist. At the slightest touch, the angel pulled his wrist away as if your touch had burned him. You frowned and tried again, wondering if that was just a reflex, but he deliberately moved out of your range and you gaped at him.

“What is wrong with you?” You asked, rendered speechless by the cautious look in his eyes. “Why won’t you let me check your pulse?”

The angel’s tense body never relaxed but he allowed himself to return to his original sitting position, eyes still a little wide from the previous interaction.

“Do you think my filthy touch will taint your body?” You asked, wariness dripping from your voice. You almost expected him to look at you with disdain.

“That is not why, no,” he sounded upset instead, moving to grab your wrist instead, flinching slightly again at the touch but relaxing soon after, curling your fingers with his. “I am sorry.”

You kept staring at him in confusion, watching him fidget a bit until he finally gave in.

“It has been a while since I remembered what human touch feels like.”

Oh.

All those times, deliberately moving out of your way and avoiding touching any humans, and now… caressing your hand and holding it with both hands, tracing the curves of your knuckles and marvelling at the sensation that he felt, cautiously meeting your eyes as if there was an implied sin somewhere that he was scared of committing-

All because he was touch-starved?

You shifted your fingers to rest your thumb on his pulse, locking eyes with him and silently counting while you found yourself relaxing, almost entranced by the way he looked at you. So shy, yet determined.

This was not Seonghwa. This was not the man you had spent all your life with. He had never looked at anyone this way.

“Hwa…” you whispered and the angel frowned in confusion. You squeezed his hand.

“I’ll call you Hwa.”

The fire behind those eyes, the flame in those pupils and the warmth of his touch. Seonghwa’s anger. ‘Hwa’. He held your hand between both of his as if it was a holy relic and planted a soft kiss on your knuckles, shutting his eyes and relishing the feel of his lips against your skin. The lips as soft as the petals of a flower. Hwa- that’s what the name meant.

“Thank you for giving me a name.”

You did not need to check your own pulse to realise that your heart was racing as much as his heart- perhaps, in a twisted synchrony.

The meeting with Assemblyman Hwang had gone smoothly without any disruptions with Seonghwa signing a deal that would expand his drug business while giving him protection from the law. However, your interaction with the angel at the lab had left a bitter aftertaste on Seonghwa’s tongue. While he never talked about that interaction or mentioned your new name for the angel, you could tell that he was conflicted about your behaviour with his ‘alter ego’, as you had termed it.

And how could he not be confused? ‘Hwa’ was a foreigner in his body, doing whatever he pleased. The angel was opening up to human experiences more with each passing day and trying different things that Seonghwa himself would never do. The angel seemed to have a fondness for water bodies and mostly, when he took over, he would find the pool and either sit with his legs submerged or just float in the water while staring at the ceiling, as if he could see the stars or heavens, or whatever the angel saw in the sky in his realm.

Seonghwa would be lying if he said that having an angel inside him wasn’t… enlightening, to say the least. While he could not look into the angel’s memories like the angel could, he was intrigued by everything the angel had to share. It made him question his beliefs, but it also strengthened his ambitions.

As for you… it had only been a few days yet the little things were starting to get to Seonghwa. You spoke to the angel so gently and carelessly. You indulged in whatever the angel had to say or did. You entertained him and satiated his curiosity. You let him look at you or touch you however he wanted.

Were you doing it because you wanted something out of the angel? Did you think you could win his heart or convince him to create the medicinal drug for you? Or were you doing this out of fear? Fear for your life, for Seonghwa’s life? Or… was the sadistic side of you enjoying Seonghwa’s misery?

He would not be getting answers to that any time soon, and he would not dare ask you for a multitude of reasons- the first and foremost being that he did not want to sound like he cared. Whatever you did with the angel should not be affecting him as long as you remained within your limits and didn’t cross some invisible boundaries, he told himself and hoped you were aware of that too.

He was not going to lie and say it didn’t sting a little that you barely looked at him anymore when he was Seonghwa. He had to do stupid things to get your attention now, such as-

“If you poke me one more time, god help me Seonghwa, I will break your fingers.”

There you were.

You did have phases like these, where Seonghwa would wonder if you were growing distant from him or had found something- or someone- better than him. Seonghwa was a manipulative bastard and he always made sure that you were within his sight. He never allowed you to look too far, and whoever looked your way? Well… they would be subject to an unfortunate fate soon after.

You were his. His little doctor, his only friend, his family if he ever had one, his everything, yet… nothing. Perhaps, the last part was a lie, the angel had suggested in one of his whispers. Perhaps, the angel was right. But admitting it would mean that he had a weakness, and Park Seonghwa did not have any weaknesses. He had made that mistake once and lost a dear brother, the reminder of which was inked on his neck so he would never forget.

So why did this little phase feel different, almost threatening to him?

“Don’t you have anything better to do?” You asked, but when he raised a brow in amusement, you shut up.

You had brought this upon yourself, bounding him with yourself to keep him ‘under surveillance’. He definitely did not have anything better to do at home in the late hours of night. He had wrapped up his work in the evening and accompanied you to the lab for the daily check-ups and for the past few hours, he had been rolling around on his bed. There was nothing to plan, nothing to scheme for once. He just watched you study and make notes on your devices and before you knew it, he had joined you on the couch, poking at your sides once in a while, making you swat at him in dismissal as if he were a mere fly.

Perhaps, all his talk about being ‘the boss’ had not worked very well, after all. He should have never let you get so close- or gotten so close- because you sure had a way of acting like the one in charge sometimes. The small, almost non-existent emotional part in his brain told him that you certainly helped with his loneliness and he had to agree. You were a crutch now.

“You know I can’t sleep well with all this incessant sound of your typing- why do you type so loudly on a screen?”

“The sounds help me focus,” you told him. “Let Hwa take over. He’ll sleep for the both of you.”

Seonghwa narrowed his eyes. “You want me gone that bad?”

“Aw, is the mafia boss hurt?” You mocked, going back to highlighting an important line in the research paper- perhaps, the tenth paper of the night. You were scrounging through them for any information on working with a chemical bond as unique and complex as the angel’s essence.

When Seonghwa didn’t answer or threaten to kill you, which was the likelier response, you looked at him to find him with a sombre expression. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” he shook his head.

“Something is,” you shifted your attention to him. “Feeling alright?”

“Yeah, I’m just… confused,” he admitted. “Having someone live inside you does that to you, I suppose.”

You shrugged, watching him carefully. “If you have a problem, you can ask me. You know that, right? Forget about the ranks for once, Seonghwa. You know you can trust me.”

“I know,” he nodded assuringly. “I just don’t like this. That’s all there is to it.”

You pouted. Nothing you could do about that.

Seonghwa had a multitude of questions to ask you about the angel but he decided to hold them for now. Instead, he locked your devices and took your hands, steering you to the bed. You laughed- your old Seonghwa was back. He tucked you in the sheets, just like he had done a thousand times now when you were little and would fall asleep in the middle of studying. Dimming the lights until there was only one lamp at the front of the room, its white light creating a soft halo effect in the room, he got on the other side and silence took over. The sounds of your unsynchronised breaths started to fill the room.

You turned your neck to find him wide awake, staring at the ceiling. You felt a pang of longing inside you- you wished you could hold him and tell him that it would soon be over, that you were sorry, that you wished you could make it better and you did not like seeing him acting so unlike himself-

“Shut up, you’re too loud,” he said and you snickered. You shifted until you were facing him though he didn’t move.

“What did you hear?”

“You’re sorry. You don’t like when I act strange, though you do enjoy it,” he spared you a glance and you grinned.

“That’s only half of it, though.”

“Would I want to hear the other half?” He asked.

“Well… some things are better left unsaid for a reason, eh?”

Seonghwa shifted to mirror your position, now facing each other. It was a good thing that there was still a respectable distance between you two. Sleeping like this had never been a problem- you didn’t have the luxury of sleeping in separate spaces for most part of your childhood, and once you did have the luxury, you would find each other anyway.

“Something tells me I should hear it anyway.”

“Ah, it’s the sentimental Seonghwa tonight, I see,” you retorted and when he shot you a glare, you gave in. “I wish I could make this situation better for you.”

“Hmm… you’re doing your best, though. Try harder from tomorrow,” he ordered and you muttered a ‘yes sir’. “What’s the last bit?”

You bit your lips- would you dare tell him now? If he pushed you away, you would have to live with that.

But then… he pushed you away all the time anyway, and there was Hwa. He made up for it.

“I just…” you started, finding his hand under the sheets and brushing your fingers against his. He remained still. “I just want you to hold on if things get hard.”

“Things will get better,” Seonghwa said, the words sounding like a lie even to himself. “I know I could die, we both could if the angels or anyone finds out about this, but… it will be okay. We will survive this, y/n. We always do.”

“I don’t want to live through that pain again,” you whispered.

“Tsk. You’re strong. You’re a warrior, and you will survive,” he assured you. “I will make sure you do.”

While he did not hold your hand, he let your fingers remain where they were, caressing his and you moved just a bit so you could lightly link them. A shaky breath left your lips as you allowed yourself to relax, welcoming sleep and leaving Seonghwa to wonder if he could say the same about himself- would he survive this ordeal?

He would wonder about that later.

When you opened your eyes the next morning, you were greeted by the sight of Seonghwa who was already awake and watching you. You frowned, rubbing your eyes and moving to check the time before slumping right back- you could still get a few minutes of sleep.

You shut your eyes and curled your body, fisting the sheets, your head spinning with drowsiness. About a minute passed when you realised that the person watching you sleep wasn’t Seonghwa-

It was the angel.

You opened one eye to find him watching you with the softest gaze, lips parted. Your heart would have swooped if you weren’t half asleep.

“Never watched a human sleep, eh?” You asked, voice raspy.

“Not like this- not so closely,” he admitted.

And perhaps, the drowsiness was getting to your head. You moved closer, tucking your head under his chin. The angel’s body tensed and you grinned to yourself- your bodies were still maintaining a distance but at least he wouldn’t be able to see your sleepy face.

“There we go. You can take an even closer look now,” you said, preparing to go back to sleep.

“I cannot see you anymore,” the angel complained.

“Perhaps, that is the whole point,” you told him.

“I suppose I can try something else then.”

Before you could ask what was going on in his head, he was tucking you closer, wrapping his arm around your waist. For a few moments, drowsiness left and clarity overcame your senses- Seonghwa had never cuddled like this with you. This- one arm draped over your waist, keeping you close, his other hand caressing your hair in an attempt to lull you back to sleep, your breaths synchronising with the rise and fall of his chest…

Heavens above.

“Do I scare you?” The angel asked cautiously and you made the mistake of looking up, finding his eyes filled with worry.

“No,” you admitted, watching his expressions morph into what had to be happiness.

“Then relax, and get your fill of sleep.”

Easier said than done. The fact that it was ultimately Seonghwa’s body and his voice made this entire situation more difficult to comprehend. However, there was no other choice but to relax in the angel’s touch and perhaps, that’s what you were meant to do for now. You relaxed a bit and fisted his shirt- Seonghwa’s shirt- instead of the sheets.

And when you woke up later, the angel was asleep, looking content. You knew it was the angel because Seonghwa looked like he was fighting demons even in his sleep. You smiled at the sight, daring to caress the angel- Seonghwa’s- face, feeling something sad building inside you. You tucked his hair away, the strands as soft as you remembered from years ago. You ran your fingers through his hair-

Wincing when you felt a sharp burn against your finger. You drew away your hand, finding a small part of your index finger singed- was there something in his hair? You cautiously ran your hand through his hair again-

A little yelp escaped your mouth as you felt a sharper burn this time and you clutched at your hand, a small red welt near your thumb now-

“Oh, dear,” the angel was awake and inspecting your hand worriedly. You looked at him in confusion and surprise as he shut his eyes to say a prayer, holding your hand to his forehead and then bringing it to his lips, planting soft kisses on the burns that seemed to be patching up as if there was never a wound in the first place.

You gasped in disbelief, inspecting your hand. “How did you do that?”

“I am sorry,” the angel’s brows were furrowed in pain as if he himself had received those burns. “I did not mean to- it is probably my halo. I did not know it would burn even as a human.”

“It’s okay,” you assured, examining your hand. “I’m all patched up now, aren’t I?”

“I hurt you-”

“It’s okay,” you broke into a smile. “It didn’t hurt too much- I was more surprised.”

“I burned you-”

“Hwa,” you cupped his face, making him look at you, his eyes glazed. “I’m a strong girl. These little burns don’t make me feel much. I receive burns all the time, see?” You showed him your hands and arms, littered with faded scars of burns. “In my field, you get used to it.”

“Your skin is not meant to be marred like this.”

“But humans carry the marks of their life all the time,” you told him. “Don’t you carry something like that too? If not on your body… in your heart?”

Hwa looked at you with thoughtful eyes, moving to sit cross-legged on the bed, never letting go of your hands as you moved to sit in front of him. He sighed deeply, unable to meet your eyes.

“Do you want me to heal them?” He asked cautiously. You shook your head no.

“Each mark on my body tells a story. I’d like to keep them,” you explained.

“Can I… kiss your hands anyway?”

Oh. He was going to be the death of you.

“Do you have a thing for my hands, sir?” You joked. “These aren’t the prettiest hands ever, I can find you a better pair-”

The angel ignored your rambling, planting soft kisses on the back of both your hands before he looked up. “To me, they are beautiful, because they tell your story.”

“Hwa- you can’t just kiss my hands and act all normal afterwards. This is not normal.”

“I am an angel,” he told you, kissing each of your knuckles, looking almost drunk with his flushed cheeks and glazed eyes. “Normal cannot define or bound me.”

Your eyes twitched in half anger and half… submission.

“What are you trying to do, Hwa? What are you trying to pull?”

“Do you think I have some hidden intentions?” He asked almost dangerously, and you thought that he looked obsessive for a second. “I- I only wanted to experience this feeling, and if you want to push me away, I will go back to hide in the corners-”

“What feeling do you want to experience so badly?”

“Being human,” he said, almost spat as if the idea appalled him too. “I cannot tell if it is the human in me making me feel so strange, but I want to touch and be touched. I want to live- I want to eat like humans do and savour the flavours on my tongue. I want to bask in the sun until it starts to burn me and float in the pool until I feel one with the water. I want to hold another human, feel their heartbeat against mine, do something about the yearning in my heart- I’ve never felt like this.”

For once, you had nothing to say. You simply watched the angel curl in on himself, looking like a broken piece.

“And I’m scared,” said the wounded soul. “I’m scared that I will never be able to go back to my realm. I’m scared of being okay with that. I’m scared of enjoying these human experiences. What if I do not hate the idea of being human and they find me? I do not want to die a human, yet…”

“I’m sorry for misunderstanding you,” you did not hesitate to pull the angel in your arms. If this was what he needed, you could give him that. The angel sucked in a breath but quickly melted in your arms, clutching at you almost childishly.

“I think I understand you,” you caressed his head, not caring how it burned your skin. “You’re a human, for now, whether you like it or not. This is your chance to experience what it is like to be a human without any boundaries. No one is stopping you, and I… I will protect you… until you are ready to go back. I hope you will be welcomed with open arms when you go back. You must miss your home so much, Hwa. I’m sorry I didn’t realise that- you do not have to be human to miss your home.”

Hwa buried his face in the crook of your neck, taking deep breaths. You winced at your damaged hands, resorting to hold him still instead.

“Have you always been this mellow, oh angel?” You asked.

“This is who I am,” the angel admitted, drawing away. “But you have seen how angry I can get.”

“Yeah, angry is an ugly look even on angels,” you agreed, shivering at the memory when you felt like he would have obliterated your existence with a mere swipe of his finger. You showed him your hands and he winced, looking apologetic but you smiled, making pride swell in his heart. With a prayer, he kissed every burn mark until your hands were back to normal.

“I will try to refrain from caressing your head from now on,” you stretched your fingers. “My hands are precious to me, thank you very much.”

The angel laughed, a small part of him knowing you wouldn’t be able to do that. You shared a laugh, smacking his back and asking him to get up and join you for breakfast.

Once again, in the privacy of your room, you crumbled to the floor.

What were you doing? Letting the angel touch and hold you like that- he was supposed to be the touch-starved being, but you were no better. How could you do this to yourself- to Seonghwa?

Just what were you getting yourself into?

And why did the consequences of your actions not scare you?

Everything seemed to be in order in your life and Seonghwa’s, yet it had never been like this before.

Seonghwa never talked about your intimate interaction with the angel- you knew that he was able to see fragments of what was happening through the shared subconsciousness, and if he tried, he could even share consciousness now given that the angel would not resist.

Either Seonghwa did not mind, which was unlikely, or for once, he had nothing to say, which was odd. He always had something to say about every situation, and his silence was louder than ever.

However, his behaviour was the same- in fact, he had grown more understanding in the past few days. Understanding of his situation, of the lack of control he had over his own body. Understanding that you were still trying to find ways to get the angel out of his body, contacting every demon summoner and going to dangerous places with him to learn more about the dark arts. You would never tell a soul that you were doing this for an angel.

You had also started to look into the history of angels, and while the angel himself didn’t share much about his realm- sworn to secrecy, perhaps- he guided you anyway. He was able to confirm or deny whatever you read about angels.

You came across his real name in one of the books and learned that he was an angel of fire- while he was not an archangel, he was considered to be one of the angels with their own conscience, which meant that he was capable of sin. You were confused about that topic so the angel silently turned the pages of your book until you were at the section of ‘Fallen Angels’.

That day, the angel wished to go out and fly, so you took him to the mountains instead where you sat on the edge of a rock and watched the world below. That’s when you asked him if there really was good and evil in every human.

“Humans are not inherently good, but humans lack the desire to sin when they are younger. As they grow older in their intellect, the desire to sin becomes something appealing to them. The more a person sins, the more evil they become until the goodness in their heart is nowhere to be found.”

“Do you think there’s any good in Seonghwa’s heart?” You asked and the angel looked at you. Dressed like Seonghwa in a fur coat with his hair twisted back and tied, you almost thought it was Seonghwa himself sitting beside you.

“Do you believe there is good in this human’s heart?” The angel questioned.

“Maybe,” you pouted.

“Does it matter to you if there is?”

“If it mattered, I would have left long ago,” you admitted and the angel nodded.

“I cannot say if there is good in this heart, but there was something that pulled me to him instead of you, when I was going to possess you. Maybe the evil inside me resonated with his nature.”

“But you’re an angel,” you looked at him. “You’re not evil.”

“There is the desire in me to sin, therefore I am capable of being evil,” the angel responded. “I feel as if I am sinning even now. Sitting with a human, stuck inside one, unable to perform my duties…”

“Do you hate being evil so much? If this is what evil is to you?”

The angel did not answer your question. And it got you thinking that maybe, there was a goodness inside Seonghwa that created the space for the angel. If that was the case, there was evil inside the angel too. Maybe, this was the true meaning of balance- a human too evil, and an angel too good, yet both containing a little kernel of pureness and darkness in their hearts- both coexisting inside one body.

But if being human was what encompassed the idea of being evil for an angel, this angel sure was enjoying the most mundane experiences. He was no longer opposed to trying out new things- a smoke, which had him coughing his lungs out later, cotton candy from the stall because it looked like clouds (Seonghwa was not pleased about that, claiming it left an aftertaste in his mouth), and food. Food of all kinds because apparently, the human had not been enjoying eating lately.

The angel’s curiosity wasn’t satiated with just that. You almost felt as if you were teenagers again and going on dates. From picking flowers in gardens to learning how to ride a bike. You made sure all your outings were away from the eyes of the staff or anyone who could recognise you, because you were sure no one would like the most notorious mafia leader in the town wiping dust off the petals of flowers or screaming like a banshee before falling down from the bicycle unceremoniously.

The angel- Hwa- was laughing like a human and it warmed your heart because Seonghwa had never been able to laugh like that. His laugh was pure and unrestrained, something humans usually wished for. His eyes sparkled as he observed the human world, watching and learning the concept of a family, of friends, of lovers. You could only wish Seonghwa was learning something along with the angel too.

While the angel started growing closer to you, the human started growing distant. Whenever Seonghwa took control of his body, he would busy himself with work and not correspond with you much- on anything. It would be up to you to update him of the recent developments, or learnings, or whatever you wished to tell him- he seemed the most uninterested. He didn’t care anymore if you wanted to talk, keep him under your surveillance or leave him alone. It was almost as if he had sworn himself to the silent treatment.

This wasn’t the first time he behaved that way, but it was different this time. Whenever you did something wrong or made any sort of mistake, it was a given that Seonghwa was going to give you the cold shoulder for at least a couple of weeks. You could try to make him give in- bribe him with something that he could not resist (the latest Lego usually did the trick- he may be the mafia boss but he loved his legos) or treat him to something nice. That usually solved the matter, but each time you were not allowed to defend yourself. Sure, he would hear you out occasionally, but he would rarely ever be convinced.

This time was different. While he did not consciously push you away, his behaviour was doing nothing to help you. It was getting harder for you to not look forward to Hwa taking over- at least he didn’t look at you with contempt. Something was off about Seonghwa, and you were trying to ask him what was bothering him so much- he refused to meet eyes with you or converse with you properly and you knew no bribery could resolve this.

“Have we dispatched the first batch of drugs to Assemblyman Hwang?”

“We have, it’s written there,” you pointed at his tab and he hummed, dodging your question once again. You decided to change the topic.

“Do you think we should try something like exorcism? An angelic version of it? The theory doesn’t sound bad, does it?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “Whatever you feel like.”

You stared at him- he was trying so hard to act normal. This wasn’t going to work.

“Are there any more documents to sign? My fingers are starting to hurt- you know how I was in the lab all day working with specimens-”

“So?” Seonghwa dropped the pen and finally looked at you, eyes cold enough to send a shiver along your spine. “Do you want the angel to take over and worship your hands again?”

You scoffed in disbelief, wondering if that was a joke. When he went back to marking notes, you tapped on the table to get his attention.

“Say that again,” you challenged.

“We all know how much you crave affection,” Seonghwa muttered. “Good thing the angel is willing to show you some, at least.”

Unbelievable. This was what was bothering him?

“I asked you time and time again to tell me if something was bothering you- why did you keep your feelings bottled up only to stab me with your words now?” You asked. “You think I enjoy the fact that you’re sharing your body with an angel? Forget about what the angel does, you think I really want you to disappear?”

“It sure feels like that sometimes. You’re doing well without me, aren’t you?” Seonghwa scoffed.

You felt blood rush to your head, making your vision go red for a moment. Rage.

“I’m cooperating with the angel, Seonghwa. I’m playing along with anything the angel wants so you don’t have to suffer, you miserable, miserable bastard. I’m doing all of this so that the angel shares consciousness with you and does not mess up your business- or would you rather have the angel taking over and actively fighting back? Fuck you,” you spat, throwing your own pen across the table which he barely caught.

Not a hint of remorse in those eyes, though his little smirk had disappeared.

“You’ve always sheltered me all your life,” you got up, lowering your voice and this time, guilt did flash in his eyes for a mere second. “You’ve made sure I had no one except you, and you made sure my eyes only found you- that I only looked at you. So forgive me, Seonghwa, if you finally look back for once and I still find my defences crumbling when it isn’t even you.”

With that, you turned to pick up your belongings and leave-

And when you heard the familiar sigh that marked the angel taking over, you froze.

Had Hwa perhaps heard that? All of that?

You cautiously looked at him, finding his eyes filled with hurt. He almost looked grieved.

“Hwa-”

“Stop,” the angel raised his hand in the air, his voice dripping with sadness. “Not another word-”

“No, listen-”

“I know what I mean to you now,” Hwa said with a restrained voice as if still struggling to accept what he had heard. “There is nothing more that you can offer me.”

“I only said all of that because of Seonghwa,” you explained gently. “I did not mean that-”

“Yeah, Seonghwa heard that,” the angel said, shutting his eyes. “The damage has been done, human. To both of us.”

“Hwa, angel,” you dropped your stuff and took a few steps towards him but he left the room, leaving you regretting every word that you had said. Your eyes welled with tears and you took a few deep breaths, the tight feeling in your throat growing with each passing second.

You needed to find him- Hwa.

You looked in Seonghwa’s room first, but he wasn’t there. You wondered if he went to the pool and on your way there, you searched the rooms, asking the few staff members who were present if they had seen their boss around. None of them had.

And when you found the pool empty, you sank to the ground and buried your face between your knees, letting out choked sobs- it had been years since you had cried. You were not sure if you were crying because of Seonghwa, or Hwa, or just everything-

But it looked like you would be filling the pool with your tears tonight.

You cried until there were no more tears left, until your clothes were soaked. You sobbed until your throat felt raw, your nails leaving dents in your skin where you dug them in your palm. You silently cried until you heard the familiar footsteps, and it was almost surprising how that triggered a fresh stream of tears.

Was that Seonghwa? Or was that the wretched angel who had taken over your mind and soul? It didn’t matter anymore-

“Why do you cry, my dear?”

The damned angel. You brought your knees closer in an attempt to hide your face, but it looked like the angel was not going to give up. He sat in front of you, taking your hands in his and making you flinch visibly. Hurt, he let go of them.

“What is the reason for your tears?” He asked gently. You took a deep breath, sneaking a peek and finding his eyes puffy as well.

“Don’t tell me that you cried and wasted your essence,” you muttered, making the angel shake his head in disbelief.

“I told you that the essence is of no use to you. I wiped every trace of it, don’t worry.”

You sighed, burying your head back between your knees. This time, when the angel hesitantly brushed his fingers against yours, you didn’t flinch away. However, he made no attempt to hold your hands either, only tracing the outlines of your fingers.

“I am sorry for my behaviour,” the angel said and you looked up at him. “I should have given you a chance to speak. I know humans say things they do not mean all the time- and if it is of any relief to you, your human Seonghwa did not mean to hurt you like that either.”

“It doesn’t matter,” you told him. “The damage has been done.”

The angel gave you a look. “You have a habit of throwing my words back at me.”

“It’s the truth, though,” you said, getting up and the angel followed. You wiped your face, tired. “I meant what I said. Every word of it. Yet…”

You looked sideways, biting your lips to keep more words from spilling. The angel looked at you expectantly.

“Seonghwa is not able to hear or see anything right now- I’ve pushed him back. So you can say what you want to me.”

You took a deep breath. “I’m not spending time with you because I’m scared of you, or scared of what you will do to Seonghwa. Yes, initially I was- of course I would be. I’m only a human and you’re a divine being. However… I don’t know, Hwa. I’ve always wanted Seonghwa to really look at me, to acknowledge me. And when you look at me, when you are with me… strangely, I find myself forgetting all about Seonghwa.”

“Is that the truth?” He asked cautiously and you nodded. You weren’t going to lie now.

“I’m exhausted. I don’t know what I want or what I’m doing, but I just want you to know that I like you. I’m not simply cooperating with you, I like spending time with you- just you, the angel who’s beginning to live like a human. I know I’m supposed to get you out of this body even if it means that you get hurt in the process, and frankly, I’m still searching for a way to get you out, but…”

“But?” The angel asked and you mustered the last bits of courage in you, for the final declaration- the one you were too afraid to admit and even more scared to say out loud.

“Tell me,” the angel beckoned, taking a step towards you. You let your eyes scan him- the body of Seonghwa, clad in a black shirt and slacks, yet not his demeanour. Seonghwa’s face, yet unlike any expressions he had worn. His messy curls falling on his face only made him look more human, and it hurt.

“I don’t want you to leave, angel,” you confessed with a short laugh, letting the angel wonder what that meant. You turned to leave- at least you could put distance between the two of you-

“Then stay. Make me stay,” the angel’s voice was firm, almost as commanding as Seonghwa’s, but authoritative in an entirely different manner. A request, a favour. A plea.

“You’re an angel,” you reminded him, your voice wavering. “You are supposed to be performing your duties, you are supposed to be righteous and not give in to sin.”

“Yet here I am,” he shrugged, smiling in defeat. “Falling from grace and finding pleasure in sin- if this is what sin is.”

“Can I really ask you to stay?” You held your breath.

“You could ask me to fall from the heavens, and I would. I think I have already fallen. And I’m afraid of what I will let myself do for you, so stay, please.”

This was an angel, ready to sink to his knees for you. Your breath quickened as you turned, your heart ready to burst from the sheer amount of emotions.

“Where’s Seonghwa?”

“Not anywhere near,” the angel confirmed, the two of you moving towards each other, the magnetic pull stronger than ever. Your arms wrapped around each other in a tight embrace, laughter bubbling out from the angel’s body and you soon joined- smiling in relief.

This was where you were meant to be. In his arms, feeling safe. Feeling loved.

You broke apart, his hands resting on the dip of your waist. You brought your hands to wipe the remnants of his tears from his eyelids, shaking your head and he smiled guiltily. Your gaze stuck on his parted, plump lips and before the angel could express any doubts, you secured your confession by capturing his lips in a soft kiss, making the angel freeze.

You drew back and looked at him in confusion, anxiety starting to bubble in your throat once again- had you made a wrong move? However, the angel seemed as if he was in a daze, his eyes travelling all over your face.

“What do you think you are doing, love?” He asked, cupping your face and tucking your hair back, not giving you a second to respond as he kissed your forehead sweetly, moving to pepper kisses all over your face, sometimes letting his lips linger as if he was relishing the feel of his lips against your skin. You fisted his shirt and raised your face right when he leaned down, your lips colliding in a passionate, slow kiss that soon started feeling heated as you moved your mouths in tandem with each other, pulling each other impossibly closer.

You broke apart for breath but it looked like the angel was not planning to let you go. He sucked at your lower lip and you welcomed him with an open mouthed kiss, making the angel lose his footing and take a few steps back, your laughter and breaths mingling. You grinned, leaping in his arms and making him back away another few steps as he struggled to maintain balance while kissing you at the same time-

And due to his own fault, forgetting there was a pool full of water behind, he let the force of your kiss physically push him back until there was no ground under his feet and he clutched at you, both of you yelping as you fell in the cool water.

You almost swallowed some but managed to find your way up, laughing helplessly at the state of you two- absolutely drenched. The angel swiped his hair back and you let your eyes roam all over his upper body, the fabric of his shirt clinging to the muscles that Seonghwa had worked hard to build. For a moment, a tiny moment, you remembered Seonghwa but any thoughts of him went out of your head when you spotted Hwa scan your body with a searing gaze that stuck on the way your clothes clung to you.

“Like what you see?” You teased. The angel licked his lips in response, swimming closer and wrapping his arms around your waist, bringing your bodies flush against each other. You breathed heavily, letting his shoulders act as a brace as you lifted your body and captured his lips in a wet kiss, tasting water and kissing him as if he was meant to quench your thirst. You made out for what seemed like hours, his hands travelling all over your body, alternating from kissing your lips to feasting on your neck, his groans and moans fuelling you, your hands and arms singed in various spots, even nicked at places.

“Oh, angel,” you whispered against his ears, sucking at his earlobe. “They might clip your wings for this.”

“I do not need to fly if I am with you,” he declared, cupping your face and making you lock eyes with him. “How did you entrap me with that demonic heart of yours, human?”

All you could do was smile devilishly in response. “Maybe you have craved darkness all your life.”

“Perhaps,” he kissed your lips sweetly. “If this is what darkness is… I wish I will never see the light again.”

“Shut up,” you laughed, hugging him tightly.

Angel. Your angel. The light in your dark life.

He kissed the cuts and burns on your arms, preparing you to get hurt for him again. A pain that you were starting to get addicted to.

Seonghwa had never had to apologise for a thing in his life.

Every decision he made came with consequences and he might harbour regrets but he would never bow down in front of someone and apologise. The other parties involved would just have to make peace with that.

He did not believe in the idea of apologising, even when time and time again he caused you hurt or discomfort and you demanded that he show some remorse to make things better. He preferred to let the tension die down instead and let your defences lower until you would forget that he wronged you in the first place. You only had him, so where would you go if you broke things off with him?

However, as Seonghwa got a look at himself through the reflection of the mirror-engraved wall of Assemblyman Hwang’s office, he shut his eyes for a moment and saw red. He willed himself to maintain his composure and smiled at the Assemblyman.

No wonder the man wasn’t taking him seriously.

“- rest assured, we’ll do our best to keep this inside the underworld channels and not let any scandals surface, so you can keep on providing us with the goods, okay?” the man said, pouring red wine for the both of them while Seonghwa clenched and unclenched his fists. “I mean, I know we almost messed up but we were quick to clean it up-”

“If another mess-up happens,” Seonghwa started in a low voice, making the middle-aged man frown, “Not only will I retract and clean up your mess, but I will make sure to wipe all evidence. And that, of course, includes all consumers. You understand that, right?”

Seonghwa took a sip of the red wine, watching the politician fidget with his clothes, a nervous laugh escaping his mouth. “Of course!”

Seonghwa set the glass on the table. “It’s a dark world we live in. Gotta make sure it doesn’t get any darker, yeah?”

The politician, who always rambled about eradicating darkness from the world in his campaigns, grimaced at the mockery of his slogan. Seonghwa got up and left the room, hiding his face with his fur coat as much as he could.

Once inside the privacy of his car, he glared at the driver who squirmed but got the message. Seonghwa slumped back and wiped at his left cheek where the very vivid and recognisable red kiss mark was printed.

He was going to kill you for making a fool of him.

It was his fault- the driver had tried to warn him with a ‘Um, sir… you might want to freshen up before the meeting’. Thinking that the driver was just suggesting that because he was meant to meet a politician, Seonghwa told him that there was no need. He did not need to look anything else than the crazy man that he was. His appearance was crucial in making first impressions, and with this rough look, he wanted to show the politician just who he was dealing with. He had some points to get across.

However, the kiss mark on his cheek watered down that roughness wantonly. No wonder the politician had been smirking for the entire duration of the meeting.

Seonghwa sighed deeply. Again, it was his fault, ultimately. He never apologised for the argument you both had, and after regaining consciousness and finding himself under covers with you, snuggled way too close for his liking, he waited until you got up. He did not like the way your expressions darkened when you realised it was not the angel anymore.

You simply informed him that the angel and you had a talk, and he had decided to block Seonghwa from watching his consciousness. Seonghwa and you got into an argument again where he wondered if you were trying to do something behind his back- an assumption he immediately regretted making- and you told him that the only time Hwa would be blocking Seonghwa would be when you and Hwa had something ‘personal’ going on; nothing regarding Seonghwa and his state- or his business, even. Seonghwa tried to probe in hopes of getting an answer as to what ‘personal’ entailed but you didn’t give in.

And it seemed like he got his answer anyway. While the angel was consciously trying to block him at times, he saw the way you looked at Hwa very well. You used to look at him like this before, eyes wide and expectant, something like affection dripping from them. And now you had found someone else-

Except this was also Seonghwa, technically. One body, one mind, but two different souls.

He just needed to find out if you were serious about this- the angel inside his body was going to leave one day. If you were doing this just to piss Seonghwa off… it was working, but you did not need to go to such extents.

He did not want you to go to such an extent. He did not want to carry your kiss marks just anywhere- those things were meant to stay in the privacy of his house, right? He did not want to wake up with you in his arms anymore, without any memories of how you got there in the first place. He was supposed to be the one who tucked you in bed- only him. He did not want to hear the echoes of your laughter in his subconsciousness- he did not want you to laugh like that in front of just anyone. He did not want his lips to hold the whisper of your name or the taste of your skin- no one could touch you like that.

He was going to kill you. For sure. But first, he was going to block the angel out of his mind.

Seonghwa wasn’t sure how that would work, but he tried his best to focus on what was here and what was real instead of the being inside his head. Once he arrived at your lab where he was supposed to pick you up and take you home, he asked the driver to stay, opting to find you himself. The lab was a nice place to get rid of you- he wouldn’t need to clean the mess. Your own people would clean that up for you, just like they had always wiped the evidence of your sins.

At the sight of your tired figure making a chart on the wall with the progress of your ‘angelic expulsion’ discoveries, all his resolve crumbled.

You had a habit of making charts and calculating probabilities to visualise your learnings- whether it be about your scientific data, theoretical data or mundane things- would Seonghwa be able to kill the rival gang’s leader? Probability– 89 percent. Factors– temper, first and foremost, which affects his strategy and attack. Accounts for 11 percent though the figure may vary on how his day went. Factors– me. Am I in danger? If I am, the probability of winning increases exponentially because he won’t let a fly hurt me. If I am not… does it decrease his willpower? Check-

Seonghwa found himself smiling at the memory- you were making this effort- for him, right? Despite everything, you were trying to get the angel out of his body so he could leave you both alone, right?

You caught Seonghwa staring at you from the window and beckoned him to come inside. He entered with a huff and you frowned at his cold stance.

“What? Did the meeting not end well?” You asked.

“It went well, but it could have gone better were it not for-” Seonghwa pointed at his cheek and it took a moment to click.

“Oh,” you grinned. “Did I forget to wipe that? My bad-”

Seonghwa walked in front of you but you did not move. He peered down at you, watching you with a threatening gaze. It would have worked on others, but it didn’t work on you- not anymore.

“Have you made it your life’s mission to get back at me? This is playing dirty, Doctor.”

“Oh, so I’m ‘Doctor’ now, eh? Keeping it professional this time?” You narrowed your eyes. “Honestly, I forgot to wipe that-”

“You can’t tell me that wasn’t deliberately placed there,” Seonghwa countered.

“It was deliberately placed. Just not for you,” you patted his chest before turning away, wanting to get away from him but he grabbed your wrist and brought you right back where you were- even closer this time.

“This is not the first time, though,” Seonghwa smiled dangerously, fixing your glasses for you and tucking your hair back. “It’s a repeated offence, darling.”

It was. You were purposely trying to mess with Seonghwa, that was partly true. From making the angel try Seonghwa’s least favourite drink just before he was about to switch so there would be an aftertaste in Seonghwa’s mouth, to messing up with his appearance or clothes. Seonghwa’s patience was running out for all the right reasons.

“Hmm, well,” you tried not to squirm under his gaze. “I’m guilty.”

“I came here planning to kill you for once and all,” Seonghwa admitted, cocking his head and watching his finger trail down the curves of your face. This wasn’t the first time you had heard this phrase, but something told you that he might actually have been considering it. “But it looks like you are making some effort. Progress, even?”

“Ah, this?” You gulped, looking at the board. “Yeah, I think I’m onto something- but there’s a catch, and… I’ll have to talk with Hwa to make sure this doesn’t end bad for any of you-”

“For any of us?” Seonghwa frowned. “You’re only supposed to care about how it ends for me. That being is an angel, he’ll make it-”

“But I want him to make it out safely,” you interrupted, trying to get a point across but Seonghwa seemed too frustrated to process it. “It would be in our best interests if the angel leaves safely-”

“Your best interest,” Seonghwa pointed his finger at you, giving in and huffing. “Not mine. It was never about me, was it?”

“You’re right, not everything is about you. Just listen to me for once, you fool,” you scolded, making him sit on a stool so you could meet his eyes properly and hopefully assert some authority. “Suppose the angel somehow gets hurt or dies. That’s going to be the end of your empire- a horrible, miserable end. We’re lucky this angel got stuck inside you and all his rage dissipated because you’re too stubborn to let the angel take control. You understand?”

“I understand everything,” Seonghwa said calmly. “I just don’t understand why you care about the angel- what is he to you, y/n?”

What was Hwa to you?

The angel who looked past the sins that covered the entirety of your heart, scratched through the darkness to find a home in your heart. The angel that burned you and hurt you with his love, shed tears for you and healed you only to put you through the pain of loving him again. The angel that wanted you to release him from the clutches of the demon that Seonghwa was, yet wished to stay and give up who he was so he could be with you.

If someone would hear that out loud, they would laugh in disbelief, but you had never craved something good and pure all your life until you met Hwa. You were content in the darkness next to Seonghwa, were you not?

“Cat got your tongue?” Seonghwa asked and you shook your head, but there was nothing else left to say. He asked you to join him in the car and you followed after a few moments with your belongings, the ride home awfully silent.

That night, you did not join him in his room. You stayed in yours, darkness swallowing your room and you. Perhaps, if you stared long enough into the distance, you would become one with the dark.

However, a few hours and a soft knock later, you were joined by your doom and your salvation- only you did not know which one it was thanks to the lack of light in the room. The figure plopped down next to you on the floor with a heavy sigh, his shoulders brushing with yours and you both sat in utter silence.

When his fingers brushed with yours, you almost thought it was Hwa- he must have heard your conversation, must want answers. But when he wrapped your hand in his and squeezed it with a promise, you knew it wasn’t the angel.

It was the demon- and you were no longer sure if he was your doom or your salvation.

“This isn’t a sorry attempt at an apology, is it, Seonghwa?” You asked and you could almost hear him smile.

“I’ll be dead before you hear those words out of my mouth. You know that,” he said and you squeezed his hand back.

A few moments of silence passed, thick with confusion and tension. You caved in and asked, “What’s going on in your head?”

“I don’t know, but the angel is asleep for once,” Seonghwa told you. “It almost feels like I’m back to who I was, except… even when the angel is asleep, I’m carrying remnants of him.”

“What does that mean?”

Seonghwa squeezed your hand in answer- this. This was unusual- sure, there was a certain extent of physical ‘affection’ between you two, if it could even be called affection. It was reserved for teasing, and in rare cases, support.

“I don’t know why I’m here, but I am, and I don’t want to leave.”

“You love me,” you teased and he laughed a bit, but when he did not deny that, your smile fell- and for once, you were glad it was so dark.

“You’re incapable of love, Seonghwa. I think something in you broke when you loved your other half only to let him go so soon.”

His brother- not in the biological sense, but a family nonetheless. While you and Seonghwa were reflections of each other, Hongjoong and Seonghwa had been as similar as they were different. Hongjoong was the light, pulling Seonghwa out of his darkness while Seonghwa pulled him back in. And what a pair they made, balancing each other out in every sense yet never clashing, each rotten in their own twisted ways. It had been Hongjoong’s idea to leave the orphanage and mingle with the gangs- he did not leave with you two but found you just a week later, covered in soot and blood but smiling like a free spirit.

He had freed all the kids from the orphanage that destroyed you all- the people who clipped your wings when you hadn’t even learned to walk. He freed the kids, burned the building and all the guilty parties involved- at the mercy of luck. He got the kids to another orphanage through his connections-

And when Seonghwa asked him if you could use those kids to test your drugs on, Hongjoong had shaken his head in amusement but allowed it. It was ultimately bad luck that took his life only a few years later, right before Seonghwa’s career peaked.

He had not been the same since- and you understood. Hongjoong was your friend too- you grieved with him but he never moved on. He got their nickname tattooed on his neck so he was reminded every moment of what he lost.

“I think I’ve always been like this,” Seonghwa countered. “You just need an excuse to justify my behaviour towards you.”

Well. That was also partially true.

“But you’ve always accepted me as I am,” Seonghwa continued. “Some might think you actually love me, y/n.”

“But I do,” you admitted with a whisper. “I thought you knew that by now.”

“You love the whisper of good that you think I possess, dear,” Seonghwa corrected gently. “And once I got possessed by the angel, you found an excuse to love me without harbouring any guilt in that twisted heart of yours.”

If words could tear your heart apart- this was why the truth was so harsh. You took a shuddery breath and Seonghwa caressed your hand.

“You weren’t meant to live in the dark, y/n. I pulled you in and clung to you because you were the only one who saw me for who I am. Perhaps, even a better version of who I was, though I didn’t need that.”

“That’s arguable,” you laughed a bit. “I’ve got more blood on my hands than I can ever atone for. All for what? For science? For you?”

“You make it sound like it’s a bad thing,” he teased. You both chuckled at that, knowing very well how bad it was. You let a few moments pass, clutching on to his hand and he sensed the question before you said it out loud.

“Why did you come inside the room that day, Seonghwa? Why did you try to shield me from the angel?”

Silence. Only the sound of your breaths in the room.

“To protect you, of course,” Seonghwa answered. “Because you are my weapon, and I am your shield.”

Oh, him and his words.

“Isn’t it the other way round?” You pondered out loud. “You act like my weapon sometimes too-”

“Because,” he said, almost sounding as soft as the angel. “Because I saw the angel look at you the way only I am supposed to look at you. Did he take a look into your heart? Did he find it captivating- is that why he decided to possess you? I could not let the angel taint my warrior any further, so I shielded you.”

“Except the angel liked that,” you sighed in realisation. “The angel found your courage more attractive and got pulled towards you.

“Yet the angel continues to taint your body,” Seonghwa clasped your hand in his. “I don’t like that. I don’t like it at all.”

Silence. The sound of your heart beats.

“There is a pureness in your heart, Seonghwa,” you concluded. “And… there is a darkness in the angel’s heart- I’ve seen it. You balance each other just right. That is why the angel is stuck inside you, and I’m beginning to wonder if you two are beyond help now.”

Deafening silence this time.

“You will try, at least once. For me,” Seonghwa declared.

“I will try more than once for you, if it means it will work and you two will be separate entities, and-” you faltered, the whisper of the promise you made with Hwa ghosting on your lips.

If there was a guarantee that the angel would be able to stay in the human realm after leaving this body, you would perform whatever ritual, whatever sacrifice was required. But if there was none… you would not let him leave this body.

And now with Seonghwa right next to you, you wondered if the promise you made came from your heart. Hwa made you promise that and put the words between your lips, but did you mean it? Were you really going to keep that promise? Would you risk Seonghwa’s well-being for the angel?

Or were you just caught between two utterly selfish beings, holding the key to freedom for one or the other, or none?

When you got a call from Dr. Choi in the middle of the night, asking you to check the files he had sent you and come to the lab if possible, you were glad that Hwa had not taken over tonight and you were in your own room, which meant that you could sneak out without the angel’s knowledge.

And in the middle of tiptoeing through the hall did you realise-

Why were you wary of the angel now?

Sure, the angel had told you time and time again that you could not possibly make use of his essence- you could learn from its chemical composition if that pleased you, but he was adamant about you not experimenting with it. You understood why- working with demonic essence had been risky business and this time, there was the threat of the angel realm finding out about your work too.

However, one thing you had realised in the past few days was that the angel was a soldier at his very core. A soldier of god, bound to duty and true to his morals despite being in a human body and trying to live like one. There were still some boundaries the angel was unwilling to cross, and you were beginning to think if his righteousness was what was hindering you from making some groundbreaking discovery about the essence or if you were simply too trusting of him.

And then there was the fact that the angel wanted you- wanted to be with you. He spent all his conscious hours by your side, looking past your sins and loving you for the person that you were at the very core. He claimed that that person was beautiful and everything he could ever have desired for. He held you as if you were fragile, kissed you as if that was the last time he would get to do so, and loved you like no human ever could. He bowed in front of you and thanked you for seeing him as something other than the being that he was. His love was burning but it was pure.

His love was pure, but it was starting to cloud your judgement and you needed to recalibrate yourself every time you were alone.

So good timing from Dr. Choi too. You drove to the lab yourself and found him wide awake, which was odd because he liked his night sleep very much. You entered the office and asked, “I couldn’t read the notes because I decided to just come and visit. Brief me.”

“You asked me to extract and replicate any components of the angelic essence that is similar to the demonic essence, right?” Dr. Choi pulled a stool for you so you could examine the sample under the microscope. “Take a look at this.”

You gave him a sceptic look before examining the two samples in front of you. For a moment, you were confused before it clicked-

“These samples- they are existing independently, without being linked in any way to the essence as a whole, right?”

“Bingo,” Dr. Choi smiled proudly. “Almost killed myself during the extraction process but I’ve managed to get the non-volatile compounds out of this. Similar to the demonic essence, but still different enough in its properties that experimentation seems like worth giving a shot to.”

“Even if this does not have medicinal properties,” you started to read the notes, “It can still become a different type of drug.”

“A new line of drugs- that’s the least that can come out of this. As for the medical side, we can always keep researching, right?”

“Seonghwa’s gonna be so pleased to hear this news-”

But Hwa.

“The angel won’t be,” Dr. Choi said out loud for you and you pursed your lips. While the doctor was not aware of the shift in your relationship with the angel, he knew very well how adamant the angel had been in not letting you conduct experimentation with his essence. “Does the angel need to know about this?”

“I mean… we could conduct our experimentation in secret. According to him, we might be under threat if we let the essence be consumed as a drug of any sort. Something about how it becomes a marker for the angels. But if we’re just experimenting and erasing any evidence of human consumption simultaneously… that shouldn't be a problem, right?”

“And technically, even if we are found by the angels or whatever, we just… die. Poof. We’re used to living under those conditions anyway- do or die.”

You shared a grin with the doctor, but could you really give him and yourself a go-ahead for human experimentation with angelic essence?

The answer was simple- you could, and you can. This was your decision, and if it were not for the angel interfering with your work, you wouldn’t even be so cautious about making your decisions. This was not you. Were you scared of the angel’s wrath? Sure. You were scared of Seonghwa’s wrath too, it wouldn’t be any different.

But this- this was your realm, and you set the rules here. No one- not Seonghwa, and certainly not Hwa could interfere.

“Contact the orphanage and the prison. We’re getting busy in the coming days.”

People argued about what was something that made them feel alive. What sort of human experience was exciting enough to make them feel charged, have electricity buzzing through their veins and heighten their senses?

Some called it ‘the thrill’. They searched for it in the dark pits of this world, succumbing to their desires and inevitably losing themselves, becoming as hollow as shells. While searching for a way to feel alive, they would end up losing all purpose.

Others searched for it in human experiences- love, happiness and other emotions and feelings. They would go out seeking ‘adventure’, connecting with nature and finding meaning in the simplest things- in the creation, in everything around them, in life itself.

You, however, might be the odd one out. You stood at the threshold, tipping between ‘the thrill’ and ‘human experiences’ constantly and finding home at that tipping point. Some might argue that you were delusional and your means of feeling alive was something that deserved a special kind of judgement to have you sent into the deepest, darkest pits of hell. Was hell not simply a concept that humans created to delude themselves? Some found ‘the thrill’ in the hell they created for themselves, while the others used hell as an excuse to shape themselves into what they imagined a human should be.

Your means of feeling alive- you felt the most alive when you were working in your element, in your field. When you were playing with chemicals and experimenting on live subjects - or inspecting the dead. When you were performing practically, creating products and testing them, unhindered by any ethical or legal boundaries. In this lab, you were the creator, the judge and the creation. You were the action and the consequence. Here, you found both the thrill and the human experience. Here, you were truly alive.

“Another one passes,” you watched the vitals of one of your test subjects drop significantly- nothing that could be done about it. You had fed the young adult the angelic essence and though the timespan of the reaction towards it had lengthened a bit, he went into shock soon after. You tried saving the young adult but to no avail. “Another one bites the dust.”

“The things you say sometimes,” Dr. Choi shook his head in amusement, passing you a scalpel and you carefully made a vertical incision along the subject’s upper body, grimacing at the sight of the discoloured blood. “Shit, that’s just like what happened with the demonic essence.”

“Except we’re using the same quantity- that means the angelic essence might be stronger than the demonic one. We need to dilute it further,” you decided and he agreed, continuing with the inspection of the internal organs which appeared almost burnt.

You had been spending more time in the lab in the past few days especially at night to start testing how practical an angelic drug would be. Seonghwa was aware of your recent occupation and was also a little proud of how driven you were this time. He made sure the angel would not look into his memory too much and you both decided to keep the conversation about this topic to a minimum. Seonghwa was also taking over at night time more so he could get proper sleep, he claimed, although you wondered if it was so you could have more time working in the lab.

While the angel wondered if it was because Seonghwa wanted him to stay away from you.

Hwa had no idea of the recent developments in the lab and was only aware that you had contacted the summoner from the ritual that chained him to Seonghwa and were preparing to try another ritual, currently researching if it would be safe for the both of them. He thought that was what you were busy with during the day and was wondering if that was what occupied your thoughts when you were with him.

And if the angel was a little honest with himself… he was a little scared of what you felt for Seonghwa.

He understood that Seonghwa was the only person in your life from the beginning, and your bond with him was something irreplaceable. He also tried to be understanding when Seonghwa started blocking his memories and consciousness actively- if the angel could do that to him, so could he. The angel had no right to complain anymore. However… what did the two of you do when the angel was out of the picture?

Nothing, was the answer. You would work in your respective spaces, sometimes chat about something or anything. On rare occasions when one of you was feeling sentimental, you would find the other and share comfortable silence or tease each other. That was it.

However, the angel may be oblivious to some things but he was no fool, nor was he blind. Seonghwa did feel something for you that went beyond what the word ‘love’ encompassed, and if the angel was really honest with himself, that was what he was scared of.

So at the first opportunity when Seonghwa’s defences lowered just as he was about to fall asleep, the angel violated their recent agreement and took over forcefully.

Hwa looked around, expecting to find you in the room- weren’t you supposed to keep watch on both of them? Or had you gone to your room to rest?

The angel found himself shrugging on a robe over the black tank top that he was wearing before exiting Seonghwa’s room and going towards yours. He knocked softly and opened the door, worried about waking you up if you were asleep, but he found the room empty and your usual belongings gone. So you were not home.

And that meant you had to be at the lab. There was no place else you could be- even your car was not in the garage.

So the angel found himself outside the lab, sensing something off about the air even before he entered. He found the lab room where you usually worked with Dr. Choi empty, your belongings dispersed around the room. So where were you?

A warning song- similar to the one he used to sing to the humans who needed a little reminder of how small and insignificant they really were in this world- started sounding in his head. The angel wasn’t sure if he was singing it or if it was being sung for him.

He got his answer when he found you in the dark basement, the stench of blood and something rotten filling his nostrils. He froze at the sight of you- you were beautiful, lit by the dim white overhead light, but so, so tainted with blood and sin. The dead bodies all around you… the humans that were alive but silently begging to be killed. Your eyes, sparkling as you looked around, blood splattered across your scrubs. The angel looked around and his heart sank as realisation hit him-

You were experimenting with the angelic essence.

The angel saw red before his eyes before he knocked on the door. You looked up and waved at the man, your smile falling when you realised it was the angel in front of you.

“Uh… I’ll be back,” you told Dr. Choi who told you to take your time. You were nearly done anyway and you could go home soon.

You opened the door for the angel, his gaze unforgiving and suddenly, you were gripped with the same fear that you had felt when you first saw him.

“I forbade you to not experiment with the essence, but here you are.”

“Why are you here?” You asked and the angel raised a brow.

“Funny that this is the first thing you ask,” he commented, glancing inside the room through the slightly ajar door. “Y/n… I trusted you to keep your word.”

“Look,” you sighed, taking off your mask and cap. “I’m not doing this for the medicinal drug- you told me that it would be no use and I took your word for it.”

“Then what is this for?”

“For…” you contemplated making an excuse or lying but it was too late. “For the drugs, Hwa. I’m just trying to see if a compound extracted from the essence can be consumed like the ones from the demonic essence are-”

“I told you not to experiment!” The angel raised his voice and you shut your eyes, exhaling. “Why do you need to make a drug out of angelic essence? Do you have any idea of the consequences if this gets out-”

“I do,” you started moving towards another room and once in some privacy, you glared at him, his features seeming sharper with the faint lights casting shadows on his angry face.

“It’s not like I’m manufacturing the drug, Hwa. We’re far from it- I’m only studying.”

“That is how you study?” The angel pointed towards the direction of the room and scoffed. “Killing humans as if their lives mean nothing?”

You narrowed your eyes at him, folding your arms. “You know who I am. I have blood on my hands- more blood than even Seonghwa has on his. You call him a rotten excuse of a human for who he is, right? Then I’m worse. I’m a demon, and you knew it, yet you chose to love me and hold my hands as if they were a holy relic.”

The angel’s eyes flashed with hurt- of course he knew.

“You are heartless,” he breathed out as if saying those words was hurting him. “I knew that. You are right, I knew who you were. I just thought…”

“That I would change?” You shook your head. “You thought that I would become a better person? Well, this is who I am, angel. This is what my life is. You asked me not to experiment with the essence, but you know that my heart’s deepest desire is to create more advanced drugs. You can’t stop me from doing anything to get there.”

“That is what my word means to you,” his expressions shifted from hurt to anger. “That is what my love means to you. You heartless devil. You and Seonghwa really were made for each other.”

“I may be heartless but you’re naive, and don’t think for a moment that you have any control over me, angel,” you spat the words, taking a few steps towards him for emphasis. “And you- you’re a liar. You told me that we could not get anywhere with the essence. You said you could not lie.”

The angel’s eyes almost glowed with the whirlwind of emotions that he was feeling, and your pointed finger in his face wasn’t making things better. He curled your finger back into your fist and held it in his hand, his touch physically burning you and you snatched your hand away with a yelp.

“Angels cannot lie, but they can hide the truth.”

A wave of anger washed over you and you looked at him in disbelief. “What other truths are you hiding from me? You know how to get out of this body, don’t you? Are you staying back on purpose? Are you not letting go of this body on purpose, Hwa?”

“You asked me to stay,” he smiled and you thought there was something sinister about his smile, especially as he started tucking your hair back and lightly caressing your face. “You think I am a liar, my love?”

You shook your head, nothing making sense anymore. “Just tell me if you know how to get out of this body without hurting Seonghwa.”

“I am neither lying nor hiding the truth about this. I do not know how to get out of this body.”

“Is that the complete truth?” You dared to ask and the angel didn’t answer, holding your hurt hand and saying his prayers before starting to kiss it wherever it was burned. Tears of frustration started stinging your eyes and you looked away from his burning gaze.

“Do you hate me?” The angel asked with a cautious voice and you did not respond.

It shifted something in the angel, perhaps indefinitely.

“Do not ever look away when I look at you,” he commanded, his voice settling in your bones and you felt as if you were almost compelled to meet his eyes. His face was void of expressions, gaze dark and he cupped your face, making you shut your eyes in pain when his touch started singing your skin but the angel did not care- he was far too gone in that moment. He moved closer, your bodies flush against each other and he trailed his lips along your forehead, peppering kisses along the way and then he kissed your wet lids, drawing back.

“Look at me,” he commanded again and you opened your eyes. You were frozen in place- not because you were scared, but because you simply could not believe that the angel was hurting you like this, his hands moving to your neck, wrists and any bare skin he could find, imprinting his touch in the form of light burns. He moved to kiss your cheek, licking the tears away and your breath quickened-

His love was pure, but this? This wasn’t who the angel was.

Or were you just now getting to see the true face of the angel?

As he continued to kiss your neck and leave more singes on your skin, your body responded almost automatically and you curled into his figure, shuddering. You recalled reading something about angels and fallen angels in a book– it said something about how the angels were just god’s warriors, hollow at their core, one of their wings marred with blood for eternity. You asked Hwa what really was the difference between an angel and a fallen angel at their very core, and he did not have an answer-

Was it because he was also someone like you, struggling to stand on the threshold between being an angel or becoming a fallen angel?

What sort of an angel would hurt their human like this?

And how did this angel go from crying because his touch burned you to purposely burning you? Maybe this was your fault too- you let his love burn and consume you. You were no better.

“I am violating the core of who I am in loving you,” the angel whispered in your ear, his hair tickling your cheekbone. “Do not take advantage of that… little bird.”

“Let me go,” you cupped his face, looking straight into his eyes, the name he called you finally giving you some clarity. “Let Seonghwa take over- please.”

“No,” he shook his head. “You can’t ask me to go now-”

“You’re hurting me,” you said and it was as if he could finally see the redness all over your skin. “Go, angel. Give me Seonghwa back.”

The angel’s eyes flickered with hurt, his eyes travelling all over the places that he burned you and it was as if he finally broke from his trance- he muttered a prayer and started peppering light kisses all over your face wherever his touch had burned you, his heart aching as he saw the fresh stream of tears roll down your face. Before he could do something about your neck or your hands, you drew away.

“Please, that’s enough for now,” you hardened your gaze. “We will talk later, when you are in your right mind. Let Seonghwa take over.”

“Oh, heavens above,” he sighed, ashamed of his actions and silently cursing himself. “I hurt you too much-”

“It’s-” you paused before you could finish saying the sentence.

It was not okay. You wouldn’t be telling him that it was okay to hurt you ever again.

Before you could say anything else, the angel groaned uncharacteristically and you watched as the shift happened, visible in the demeanour change, except-

Seonghwa took one look at you and almost lost his footing, struggling to stand as he clutched at the table. You reacted immediately, making him sit on a stool and asking him if he was alright, but he only held your hands with his own shaky ones and hid his face between them.

“Seonghwa?” Your voice came out in a small whisper- you had never seen him so weak. He wasn’t crying but he very well might have been with the way his body was trembling and he was breathing unsteadily.

“Talk to me, Seonghwa,” you urged, “What’s wrong?”

“I…” he sighed heavily, looking up at you with tired eyes, the rage obvious behind them. “I fought for consciousness the moment I heard you cry. Who hurt you?”

You.

“It’s the angel, isn’t it?” He examined your hands, trembling with the intensity of emotions that he was feeling- perhaps, a leftover product from the angel too. “He hurt you.”

“Seonghwa,” you sat down in front of him, on your knees. “I’m okay. It’s going to be okay-”

“It’s not,” he shook his head adamantly. “You have no idea how much I’m struggling to not let the angel swallow me whole- I’m scared to think of what would have happened if the angel lost all control just now.”

You silently shook at the thought and he caressed your hands before continuing.

“Sometimes, it feels like if he takes over my consciousness, I will get lost in the dark pits of my own subconscious forever. But now… I realise why I’m sometimes hesitant to regain consciousness too. Because-”

He looked at your marred hands, caressing the burn marks on them lightly. “Do you know what I’m afraid of, y/n?”

You shook your head. “You’re afraid of nothing, as far as I know.”

Seonghwa smiled tiredly. “You’re right. I am afraid of nothing- I was afraid of nothing. But now… I’m afraid of seeing these burn marks on your skin whenever I wake up. How could you let him hurt you like this? You were supposed to be my warrior.”

“And you were supposed to be my shield,” you smiled sadly. “When you’re not there… I get burned.”

Seonghwa looked down, unable to meet your eyes. “This is what I’m afraid of. Hurting you and watching you love the very thing that hurts you. I’ve never been afraid of anything in my life but now… I’m afraid of losing you like this, y/n.”

Seonghwa. The most notorious mafia lord with no such thing as a ‘heart’ was afraid of losing you. Afraid of hurting you and seeing you hurt. Was this not what pure love was supposed to be, as opposed to your angel Hwa’s, who had better things to worry about?

You once asked the angel what he was scared of- other than the obvious. He talked about punishment. He was afraid of doing the very deeds that he would be sent to give punishment for. He was afraid of divine intervention- it was something that was scary to witness even as the audience. He was afraid of the future, of this world and its corrupt nature.

And the angel was afraid of loving you only to lose you.

Was Seonghwa’s love for you not purer than the angel’s love, then? Seonghwa would go to hell and back for you. Seonghwa bowed down only in front of you- you, who were a part of him, a part of his soul, he would sometimes call you.

The angel would only bow in front of god.

“You won’t lose me,” you promised though the words were of no comfort to both of you. Overcome by his emotions and some hard truths about what his future looked like, he brought your hands closer with his own shaky ones and pressed a promising kiss on both your hands. When you shifted to hold his hands instead and tried to make him look at you, he shut his eyes.

He could not look at you. Not now.

“Seonghwa,” you called, lifting yourself up a little so you could be at eye level. “Won’t you look at me?”

He only lowered his head further and you embraced him, sighing in relief when he shifted so he could hug you back properly. You let him come to terms with whatever he was feeling- he wasn’t going to talk about it but at least you could help him through it. You caressed his head without a fear of getting hurt for once, and he mustered up the courage to kiss you on the cheek.

You froze momentarily- Seonghwa rarely ever kissed you anywhere except the top of your head (that was his form of silently apologising). He nudged your cheek with the tip of his nose, his warm breath caressing your skin and you moved back slightly, making the mistake of looking him in the eyes-

You had asked for it, though. And now that he was looking at you, so close, you forgot how to breathe.

His hand went around the back of your neck, craning it so that he could make space for himself. He joined your foreheads, taking a deep breath.

“I won’t let the angel ever hurt you again. That’s a promise, okay?” He whispered and you nodded, your noses brushing against each other. He shut his eyes, brows furrowed in concentration as he deliberately nudged the tip of his nose with yours, your lips almost brushing in the process but the ghost of his lips remained on yours.

You whispered his name- a call, a plea, and he almost gave in, reminded of the memories of kissing you that he had seen flashes of from the angel’s memory- oh, how he wanted to kiss those lips himself. He felt a sharp pain in the head slice at him, a reprimand from the angel, a warning. Seonghwa brushed his lips against yours once again just to piss the angel off before drawing back with immense effort, kissing your forehead instead.

Your figure sagged in disappointment, tired from the yearning. You rested your head in his lap and gave yourself a few moments to recollect your thoughts.

You would not question Seonghwa and his actions anymore. You knew exactly what was happening. You knew what you had to do now.

There is always a moment in your life when it feels like you’ve had an awakening- as if all this time, you had been wearing the wrong pair of prescription glasses, or not wearing anything to help your blurred vision. So when you finally fix the problem, or realise what the root of all your troubles is, you start to see the world with a sudden clarity. Everything seems sharper, you can see the fine lines that you would otherwise have missed, and it’s like you have a new perspective to the world, even.

At least, that’s how you feel as you perch your reading glasses up your nose bridge, craning your neck to the right and flipping through the pages of a dark arts history book, recalling that you had read something in it which seemed to be connected to the current theory you were working on-

The theory being that angels were, in fact, worse liars than demons. Demons had a habit of being overtly honest- the only problem was that they were tricksters and spun their words such that it would be hard to unravel the truth from. Angels, however, were outright liars in the sense that they would conceal the truth and mislead you by not telling you the complete truth.

At least, that’s who Hwa was.

You spent the first couple of days trying not to have a mental breakdown and asking both Hwa and Seonghwa to leave you alone while you figured out your feelings for them but more importantly- just how much the angel had misled you? Was there anything he said about the angelic essence and its experimentation that was the complete truth? So far, there had been no warning siren ringing to inform you of some divine punishment. The heavens had not fallen over your head. You were just fine, and you were pretty sure that your experimenting was enough of a marker for the other angels. Why was no divine being interfering then?

And just what was the truth about the angel not knowing how to leave this body? Was he not leaving on purpose, a selfish angel who simply wanted to experience what it was like to not be a warrior of god? Was he staying because of you? Did he really love you or was that just an excuse to stay back in this world and delay going back to his own?

Because he did love you- oh, how he loved you. His love threatened to consume you whole with the way he held you like you were fragile and would break under his touch, contrasting with the way his touch would sometimes burn you when he was overwhelmed. His kisses were overflowing with emotions, a pure exhibit of his desire while holding a dark, almost sinister undertone to them when he would grip you tightly as if forgetting you were human. His whispers contained promises in a foreign language that you did not need to interpret- his vows were clear in his eyes and his possessive hold.

His love also threatened to break you in the way that a trapped bird was scared of stepping outside its cage for the first time. It was Hwa who made you experience what being normal would have felt like, were you not bound to Seonghwa and his drug business. You experienced so many of your firsts with Hwa and it was him who showed you what a normal life could have been like- you did so much with him that you could have never done with Seonghwa. Seonghwa had only given you limited freedom and while you did not hate that, you always wished to spread your wings and fly.

Maybe you flew too close to the sun. Perhaps, that’s why you were burning both from outside and from within. Maybe you were meant to love the moon but the moon liked to hide behind the clouds so you chose the next best thing. You had to fill the void in your heart somehow, and who better to fill it than a literal divine being that wore the skin of the man you had loved your whole life?

You were the only selfish one here, but selfishness had always been your greatest weapon and you would be sure to make use of it when the time would come. For now, you were coming to terms with how Hwa and Seonghwa were also selfish for their own reasons- Hwa, because he did not want to face the consequences of his actions and Seonghwa because he simply wanted to be free and whole again. He would probably kill you once he was- it didn’t feel like a bluff anymore.

However, there was also another hard truth about all of this, and that was that Hwa would give you up in a second for ‘the greater good’ or whatever moral code he needed to satisfy in order to please God and his fellow angels and get back to his realm if caught. You wanted to tell him that as an angel, perhaps he had sinned too much and if he ever went back, they would probably clip his wings and turn him into a fallen angel. You wanted to claw at him and make him stay with you forever simply because you could.

And the only reason you weren’t making him stay was because Seonghwa was the one who would burn down all of this world- the heavens above and hell below- for you. It might be out of love or out of a desire to prove that you were ultimately his, a dangerous obsession, but you were his priority. And you couldn’t help but wonder what things would have been like if he had kissed you that night in the lab and finally faced his feelings for you- though a part of you wondered if his feelings for you were partly because of the angel rubbing off on him.

So it was no wonder that you were losing your mind trying to put the feelings aside and work on finding a solution to this cursed turn of events. Now that you had an objective perspective (still arguable), you were realising that the divine punishment the angel was so afraid of might only be reserved for the angel himself. Perhaps, the human would be spared from it until it was their time to die and face judgement by their creator. It made sense because there were absolutely no instances of an angel summoning ever recorded.

Demons liked to be summoned, which was why there were countless records of it. Angels were summoned by force, though. You surely were not the first person in this world who had summoned an angel but you might make a difference if you recorded this summoning. That made you wonder- was it the recording part that was the problem or were the humans involved really wiped out if they interacted with angels?

If the latter was the case, you would have faced judgement a while ago- when you summoned the angel. Surely, other angels must have heard the call too. They would have intervened when their comrade got stuck inside a human or fell in love with one. Maybe the angels only interfered to make sure no traces were left of an angel summoning- that way, Hwa’s admission of the angelic essence leaving a trace and serving as a marker would be verified.

Whatever it was, the matter was in your hands now. So far, you had a few ideas- that you could use the angelic essence to lure the angels and face judgement- whatever it was, however it would be delivered. Chances were that only Hwa would have to face the consequences and while it broke your heart, you were sure the angels would at least wipe your memories to ensure another incident like this does not happen again. If your memories were wiped, you would not remember Hwa. That was probably the most risky route you could pick considering the angels could just kill you and Seonghwa and move on. You did not want to die just yet- at least not for Hwa.

Another idea was to try and attempt a reverse summoning ritual, which was a very theoretical concept with no specific details and no attempts recorded. For that, you needed an anchor in the realm that the being concerned was from, and you had no such anchor. Again, you could not risk involving another angel.

If you were the only one who could put an end to this, your resources were very limited. All you had was your drugs and your lab and-

Your train of thoughts was interrupted by a soft knock on the door and the door opened to reveal Seonghwa- as soon as you met the man’s curious eyes, you knew it was Hwa instead.

“You’ve been holed up in here for hours now,” his concerned voice said. “Come on, let’s get some fresh air.”

“Ahh, but I think I was almost there,” you straightened your back and stretched your arms, producing cracks. “Or not. Nothing makes sense.”

“That’s okay,” Hwa smiled. “Maybe some fresh air and a meal will help. When you get too focused on something, it’s good to reel back and change your environment.”

“You’re right, actually,” you got up, shutting your devices but letting the books and notes stay as they were. “I’ll join you after I freshen up.”

“Great- wear a coat. We’ll go eat something outside.”

“Someone is in a good mood today,” you eyed the angel with suspicion but he only raised his hands in the air, pressing his lips in a tight line.

“You know I’m still making it up to you. After what I did- I still feel ashamed.”

You frowned at that- you knew the angel was making an effort to be better. He had apologised until you got sick of it and warned him not to. He resorted to giving you space when you wanted but also trying to make you feel better- asking you before he touched you in any way, making sure you ate your meals and weren’t pushing yourself too hard. He could finally understand why you wanted him and Seonghwa to be two separate entities and for once, he was cooperating.

Another change you had noticed was that Hwa was starting to sound a lot like Seonghwa- in his speech, and often in his mannerism. It was unnerving but you were holding yourself back from complaining, focusing all your energy on finding the answer to this.

But for now, you supposed you could take a breather. You slipped on a black overcoat over your sweats and joined Hwa in the garage, deciding to get some ramen from the convenience store. You fell in step with him, walking down the dark streets of your posh society, lit by the full moon and the streetlights, and talking about what you had learned so far- specifically about demons. He was always willing to verify your facts on that subject.

On the way back, when he offered you his hand, you smiled and took it and he proceeded to tuck your hands in his pocket, making you shake your head.

“Have you been watching dramas, Hwa?”

“I was bored,” he went as far as to pout. “Those dramas are interesting. I’m learning a lot.”

“No wonder. You’ve been speaking casually,” you pointed out and he frowned.

“Have I?”

“Yeah, you sound like Seonghwa when he’s in a good mood,” you joked and he scoffed.

“I shall go back to the formal tone then. Perhaps you like that more?”

“I don’t mind either way,” you grinned. “Your formal tone makes you sound a little pompous, if I’m honest.”

“Noted,” he nodded in all seriousness and you squeezed his hand as you chuckled. He glanced at you with curiosity to voice a question that had been on the tip of his tongue all along, “Did you find something worthwhile today?”

You glanced back at him, gauging his expressions. “Not really. It’s too risky if we get a third party involved, whether it's another angel or humans.”

You didn’t miss how his shoulders slightly relaxed as if he had been tense all this time. He looked up at the sky, taking a deep breath. “If you want me to help, all you have to do is ask.”

“I know,” you swallowed the bitterness his words left in your mouth and covered it with a grateful smile- the trust he had broken in admitting that he had, in fact, lied to you had still not mended. You weren’t going to show a hint of doubt because you were scared of what Hwa would do once he learned that you were willing to let him go- even if that meant letting him go forever.

So for good measure, you stood on your tiptoes to peck his cheek, trying not to break into a grin when he let out a flustered sound. He quickly recovered from it and took it as his cue to wrap his arms around your waist and bring you in for a kiss, sweet and sure.

That was the easiest way to assure the angel that you weren’t planning something devious. There was an itch in your brain and you wanted to talk to Seonghwa before you would ever dare to attempt it. However, before that, you had to make sure the angel felt loved and safe with you- only then would he allow you to have some privacy with Seonghwa.

So you were glad the angel was still holding some guilt in his heart that was preventing him from having a heated session with you. You would rub it in his face by appearing scared or hesitant, sometimes succumbing to your own desires but keeping it restrained nonetheless- just like tonight. You had observed how the angel was especially demanding whenever you were researching on how to get Seonghwa back to normal.

Even now, as soon as you were back in your room, he was bringing your body flush to his to kiss you deeply. You had to admit that Hwa still made your knees weak and made you give in instantly, especially the way he was taking special care to not let you burn anymore. It still happened sometimes, but not like that night in the lab when he had lost control.

And it was ironically the angel’s glowing eyes that led you to your answer, a wave of understanding washing over you as the dots started to connect in your head. You zoned out as the angel finished healing your burns, his eyes going back to normal as he caught your gaze and raised his brow in question to your surprised expressions.

“Everything good?” He asked, caressing your cheek.

“Perfect,” you smiled, hoping it didn’t look like a smirk. “Everything is perfect.”

The angel patted your cheek, checking the time. “I should let Seonghwa take over soon. If you need me, I’ll be here, okay?”

“Of course,” you assured him. “I’m just gonna wrap this up and get some sleep. I think the lack of sleep is not helping me find answers.”

“That’s what I’ve been saying all along,” Hwa laughed and you played along until he left the room. Finally realising what Archimedes must have felt when he had his own eureka moment, you rushed towards your notes- not the research material, not the history and dark arts books but your notes from the lab placed safely in a locker.

It could work. Dr. Choi had already unintentionally worked out the logistics of it and was writing a paper on it while he worked to make his research stronger. He was thinking of possible titles and had been rambling about how he wanted to include the phrase ‘angels vs demons’ in it. You were surprised it didn’t click earlier.

You needed to tell Seonghwa- if he was willing to try it, you would reach out to Dr. Choi and work with him.

You collected yourself and went to Seonghwa’s room, standing outside with your heart pounding uncharacteristically, about to knock when he opened the door, sucking in a breath when he found you right in front of him.

“I was going to come to your room,” he scanned your face, frowning at the sombreness in your eyes. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s you, right? Seonghwa?” You asked cautiously and Seonghwa nodded thrice- a code to let you know that the angel was nowhere near. He let you inside and you shut the door, facing him.

“I think I’ve found the answer,” you told him in a whisper. “But it’s risky, and I’m scared to try it.”

Seonghwa rubbed his face, tiredness evident in the way his shoulders seemed to be slouching. His hand settled on his neck over the tattoo that was visible from the black pyjamas. “Every method is risky. What do you feel about this?”

“I don’t know,” you admitted. “It could work. It’s scientific this time, I’ll tell you,” you shared a cryptic look and he understood. “No third party involved.”

“Has the time finally come?” Seonghwa joked with a faint smile on his lips. “You always said you would love to make me a lab rat one day.”

Your lips quirked in amusement and you looked sideways. “Didn’t imagine it would be this serious. I imagined it to be a prank or something. Old me would be ecstatic to learn that I get to tie you to my stretcher.”

“How kinky,” he scoffed and you shot him a glare- this was serious for you and you knew he was trying to keep the mood light for you.

A moment of silence later, he asked, “What do I need to do?”

You leaned against the door, your hands tucked between your back and the door. Oh, how you wished you could hold him and tell him exactly what he needed to do. How you wished you could turn back time so you were back at the office insisting Seonghwa let you try angel summoning, only this time he tells you off. It was funny how meeting Hwa, the angel, was both something you never wanted to forget and something you wished you had never experienced.

It made your yearning for Seonghwa so much stronger. Perhaps, Seonghwa could feel it in the air- the words you refused to say, the actions you refused to make.

“Say something, y/n,” he furrowed his brows much like the angel yet so different, demanding. True to Seonghwa’s nature. “Don’t look at me like that.”

“Does it bother you when I look at you like that?” You asked.

There was a feeling in your gut, strange but so very familiar. Impending doom. A sign that you might never get a moment like this again. You always trust your gut, but actually listening to it was a different subject. No wonder you were here right now.

“Don’t avoid my question,” Seonghwa folded his arms but you shook your head, waiting for an answer anyway. Seonghwa took a deep breath, the small distance between your figures not helping with the lack of clarity in his head.

“Answer my question and I’ll answer yours,” you repeated a phrase you had often used on him, shooting a teasing smile in his direction before letting your eyes wander around the room- anywhere away from his eyes.

“Does it bother me when you look at me like that?” Seonghwa repeated your question, grabbing your attention. “Of course it does. You look at the angel like that-”

“I’ve only ever looked at you like that, Seonghwa,” you sighed heavily. “You were just too blind to notice until you watched me from someone else’s eyes.”

Seonghwa’s heart did break at your admission.

Having to cohabitate with another being- an angel, specifically, had made him realise quite a few things. In the beginning, it was along the lines of how he never wanted to be a ‘good’ person if the angel was the example of that. The angel was dark at its core, though it wasn’t the type of dark people used to describe humans. It was different- otherworldly and all-consuming. The angel was fighting his own demons, and Seonghwa was fine embracing his demons instead.

However, as time passed, his heart softened despite himself. It would be an excuse to say that the angel had rubbed off on him- his perspective had simply shifted because he saw you and the world from an almost omniscient point of view. While his values had not changed, he had learned the value of the people who cared for him- especially you, who always stuck with him even when he did his worst. He didn’t care if it was simply an obsession anymore- he had seen what obsession looked like through Hwa’s eyes.

Your feelings for him, and his for yours… it was something the angel could never have and Seonghwa was fucking glad about it. He may have let the angel stop him from confessing his love multiple times but if this was the last time he was going to hold you close… he would risk angering the angel.

“Answer my question,” Seonghwa asked, his voice uncharacteristically wavering. You smiled sadly.

“All you need to do, Seonghwa, is promise that you will try to fight and that you will win. That you will stay- for yourself, for the empire you have built… for the sacrifices you made and the people you lost on the way,” you paused, your gaze falling on his tattoo. “And for me. Because I’m your weapon and you are my shield, and I cannot navigate this world without your protection.”

“I thought you hated how protective I was,” Seonghwa’s lips started curling into a smile, his eyes twinkling with energy as he stepped closer. “I made you a warrior, y/n. If anything happens to me, I trust you to continue my legacy-”

“You made me a warrior, Seonghwa, but I’m tired of this battle,” you declared, an angry streak in your voice. “Nothing will happen to you. I- I will make sure of that. You just have to stay strong and fight.”

“Even if I’m afraid of the unknown?” Seonghwa inquired, placing his hands on your shoulders and caressing the bare skin of your neck.

“The Seonghwa I love isn’t afraid of the unknown,” you reminded him and he locked eyes with you. “He’s afraid of… what was it? Hurting me? Watching me love what hurts me-”

“Sweetheart,” Seonghwa warned, shaking his head but you laughed out loud, curling your hands around his wrists and holding his hands like he had held yours at the lab.

“Seeing burn marks on my hands?” You teased. “How sweet. Afraid of losing me- how romantic, Park Seonghwa.”

Seonghwa glared at you, clenching and unclenching his jaw. “Kind of regret saying that. If I had known you would hold that over me-”

“I’m holding that over you,” you gently interjected, “so you know that you won’t have to be afraid of anything when you come back.”

Seonghwa looked down at your linked hands, taking a few deep breaths and nodding slowly not only because you were right but also because he had learnt another lesson- that it was okay to love someone. Loving someone didn’t always result in losing them. After his friend Hongjoong’s death, he had grown so cold towards you, pushing you and his feelings for you away, tucking them in the deepest corner of his heart. He was lucky you never gave up on him and made him realise that loving someone wasn’t a weakness but a strength.

A reason for him to fight back against the angel. A real reason, not the materialistic ones- he could build an empire again if he had to, but he could not risk losing you.

“You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to me,” Seonghwa looked at you, watching your lips curl into a smirk. “You devil.”

“Yeah, well,” you took one step closer, looking up at him, daring him to say more. “You’re still here, so.”

Seonghwa stared at you challengingly, a smirk growing on his own lips as he crowded your personal space until your back was against the door. You didn’t shy away, the tension in the air so thick you could feel it caressing your skin along with Seonghwa’s fingers that danced against your collarbone, travelling up the slope of your neck to swipe at your parted lips, his gaze stuck right there.

“Don’t you ever get enough?” He finally asked what had been bothering him the most. How could you use him to satisfy yourself? Sure, maybe you liked the angel, but he would bet his life that it wasn’t the only reason.

“It isn’t you,” you simply answered. “It’s so different. I thought it’d be the same, but by then, it was too late, and now-”

Seonghwa put a finger on your lips to shush you- even though the angel was still dormant, he already knew what you were going to say.

And when you puckered your lips against his finger to kiss it, he wished the angel would die and never come back. He leaned in hurriedly, stopping right as your noses brushed, eliciting a gasp from your mouth.

“When are you doing it?” He asked, referring to your plan.

“Tonight,” you whispered in response, joining your foreheads and nudging his nose affectionately. “I can’t risk him finding out. Keep him at bay tonight, please.”

“If I don’t lose my mind,” Seonghwa whispered, brushing his lips against yours and tightening his grip around your waist. Craning your neck, he brought you in for the long overdue kiss, soft but strong, making your legs go weak and your arms go around his shoulders for support. He drew back to drink your expressions before diving right back in, this time unhurried but demanding, groaning with pleasure in between. When his tongue swiped your lips, you gladly opened your mouth for him, losing yourself in the overwhelming feelings of the love of your life finally caving in to you.

Not once did the angel cross your mind- not when Seonghwa kissed you softly, not when he held you like you would break, and certainly not when he let his desire fuel him as things heated up. You were soon shifted to the bed, Seonghwa promising you that he would make the most of tonight, apologising (for once) for not doing this earlier, holding on to your word when you assured him that you would somehow make this work and set him free.

You let his touch burn you in a way the angel’s had never- searing passion as opposed to a warning. You let your hands run through his hair without a worry, and let his hair tickle your bare skin as he shed the clothes off you. You let him obsess over you and lose control without the fear of getting hurt- yes, Seonghwa could hurt you in ways no one could but he would never hurt you like the angel had. Seonghwa let his desperation and emotions get the better of him tonight, feeling a sense of relief when he was finally one with you.

And only when you spotted the rays of the sun peak through the curtains, having spent all night in his arms, did you move away from his half asleep body to grab something. He peeked up and you smiled, snuggling into his body once again and sharing one last kiss, whispering confessions to each other. You hugged him after, letting your breathing synchronise with his and memorising the feeling.

And then you injected the tranquilliser into his neck, whispering sweet nothings and peppering kisses on his skin until he lost consciousness.

You had been with Seonghwa in the restricted section in the basement of your lab a few times.

Most of the time, he turned up there because he could not reach you- you had a habit of forgetting that time was an actual flowing thing and it did not stop still when you were in a certain headspace- which was experimenting with live subjects. He would watch you from the window, shaking his head at the monster he had created while his heart would simultaneously swell with pride. He would wait until you took a breather and knock on the window to get your attention.

A few times, you brought him to that section yourself, updating him on your progress. One thing you liked about Seonghwa was that he may not be the brains behind your drug production but he was fully involved in it, making note of whatever you needed and making sure you were safe here. He liked to be aware of whatever was going on as well.

However, never did you imagine that he would be your next test subject, tied to the stretcher and looking paler in the harsh white lights that lit up the room. He lay unconscious while you monitored his vitals and made sure the demonic essence being administered to him was not overpowering or harmful in any way other than expelling the angel.

You had a theory that the demonic essence could cancel every ‘impurity’ in the body to dominate as the only ‘impure’ or foreign object in the host. While working on this theory with Dr. Choi a few months ago, before you had ever summoned the angel, you had conducted an autopsy on your test subjects who had died because of the demonic drug. You noted that some of them who had underlying conditions and defects prior to overdose no longer had any defects in their body after death. It was as if the demonic drug had ‘healed’ them first before taking the spot for the sole cause of their death. A true parasitic drug, fighting for dominance to take over its host.

And if it were a demon against an angel… who would win?

You were hoping that the angel would be expelled from Seonghwa’s body, which would be the best outcome. You would quickly have to inject the angelic essence in Seonghwa’s body at that point to cancel the demonic essence- Dr. Choi and you had worked on it when you put Seonghwa in a comatose state, testing what amount of angelic essence was required to cancel out the demonic one.

In the worst case scenario though, one of them- or both- would die. According to Seonghwa, the angel was already eating away at his soul and it was a struggle for him to continue cohabitating in one body. The angel was powerful and stubborn. It wouldn’t give up so easily, so you would just have to pray that your plan would work and end well for all of you. This was your last and only resort.

Seonghwa’s body had started shaking a while ago, presumably when the battle between the angel and the demon began. You were constantly wiping sweat from his body and adjusting the drip, sometimes giving in and squeezing his hand as if to assure both Seonghwa and Hwa that you were here and that you were sorry for doing this to them. As more time passed, his body started to tremble fiercely and you tightened the clasps on his wrists and arms, not sure if they would be able to withhold.

With the damned book that brought the angel to your world resting against Seonghwa’s chest and the holy sword in one hand- tip soaked in wine but not ablaze- you started reading the section of the scripture that contained the angel’s name, Seonghwa’s eyes fluttering open when you repeated it for the third time.

“Hwa?” You asked cautiously, glancing at Dr. Choi who stood near you with the angelic essence vial in one hand and a lighter in the other. You squeezed his limp hand, making him look at you.

“Why did you call me?” He asked, tone as sombre as the first day he saw you. “What are you doing- what is happening?”

“You have to leave this body, angel,” you wiped the tear that rolled down his face. “Go back to your realm for now- just leave-”

You paused when he squeezed his eyes shut, your words eliciting a deep, pained groan out of his mouth. Dr. Choi recognised your signal and set the tip of the sword on fire and the two of you held its hilt, hoping the angel would not possess one of you if it exited the body. You checked the monitor- Seonghwa’s vitals were starting to drop which meant the demonic essence must be working with full force on his body now.

You took the angelic essence vial from the doctor and clutched it in your fist, moving to whisper in Seonghwa’s ear, calling Seonghwa’s name and reminding him of his promise- you have to come back. You have to fight back- you are my shield and I am your weapon, and I am fighting for you. I cannot navigate this world without your protection.

You did not know if it was Seonghwa or Hwa who turned his face so his lips met your cheeks, a confession and a promise tumbling from his mouth. You looked up to meet his eyes but he shut them and fell still.

Muttering a prayer to any deity who was listening, you poured the contents of the vial in Seonghwa’s mouth, Dr. Choi’s hand on your shoulder squeezing it reassuringly. The sound of your sniffles and the crackling of fire was the only sound in the room for a few minutes before Seonghwa sucked in a sharp breath and his eyes opened- unglowing.

“Seonghwa,” you breathed, holding your breath as you handed the sword to Dr. Choi and moved to cup his face, checking the vitals on the monitor before turning your full attention to him. He was already looking at you with a dazed look and you locked eyes with him, waiting for his touch to burn you as you caressed his hair, but nothing happened.

You were okay.

“Seonghwa?” You asked cautiously again. “It’s you, right? Tell me it’s you, please.”

Seonghwa gulped, his mouth awfully dry but he managed to move his head in a nod and the wave of exhaustion finally caught up to you, making your legs go weak as you slumped against his body, resting your head on his chest to catch your breath. Dr. Choi moved around and did the work, untying Seonghwa’s limbs and making sure he was responsive, taking some bloodwork and checking to see if there was anything amiss.

“There are still remainders of both the demonic essence and angelic essence in his body,” he said as he observed the blood. “But I think we’ve done what we could have. It will take a while for him to recover so we can continue to monitor him-”

“I’m fine,” Seonghwa insisted and you stifled a grin, looking up at him. “I’m done being the lab rat.”

Dr. Choi smiled. “Welcome back, Sir.”

Seonghwa shot a glare in his direction as he shifted into a sitting position, ignoring his chuckles and looking at you.

“What did you do?”

“Tried to expel the angel out of your body,” you linked your hands and he squeezed them. “It’s… happened, right? Can you feel him anywhere?”

“Not really,” he scratched the back of his neck, thinking. “This could have gone wrong.”

“Obviously. It could have gone very wrong,” you shuddered at the thought. “But I had to take a chance. Hwa was taking over your consciousness with each passing day, and as much as I loved the angel, I couldn’t let him do that to you.”

Seonghwa regarded your expressions, nodding. “And what if the angel ended up taking over?”

You pursed your lips and shrugged. “I think he would have probably killed me for hiding everything from him. I was prepared for that too-” you looked at your side where the sword now stood in the bucket, the fire doused.

“Anyways, the important thing is that you’re back, Seonghwa,” you smiled wholeheartedly. “Let’s get you out of here.”

Seonghwa smiled back though it didn’t quite meet his eyes. He kissed the back of your hand before letting you go, watching your body move with a newfound energy as you wrapped up everything in the lab, asking Dr. Choi to get some rest as well.

Once back at home, having washed up and eaten a hearty meal, you took Seonghwa to his room and held his hands, locking eyes with him.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” You asked, scanning his face.

“Just tired, and you know how there’s still the after effects,” Seonghwa muttered, sighing. “I’ll be fine.”

“If you’re angry at me, now is the time to take it out,” you teased. “Though you knew very well what you were getting into.”

“I’m not,” he scoffed, amused. “Well, I am but not because of this,” he corrected. “But I think I’ve learned to let the anger go now. There’s a reason for everything that happens, and for the decisions we make.”

You narrowed your eyes. “Looks like Hwa’s still inside you.”

“What?”

“There’s no way you said that,” you teased, “You don’t compromise to understand other people- you do what you want.”

“Yeah, well,” Seonghwa shrugged. “The angel must have rubbed off on me.”

You smiled and Seonghwa noted the weariness in your eyes. “Will you… miss the angel?”

“I will… of course I will,” you admitted, looking sideways. “I just hope he’s okay. Can you tell what happened to him? Did he get out or… did he get hurt?”

“He got hurt,” Seonghwa confirmed and you pressed your lips, taking a deep breath to keep the tears at bay. “I don’t think he made it, y/n. I can’t tell for sure right now, but it’s not looking good.”

You nodded, squeezing his hands and he moved to embrace you. There were no tears left to cry. You simply clutched onto him and let him calm you down. He let go with a kiss to your forehead.

“Everything will be okay,” he promised and you nodded.

Everything was going to be okay.

“Love, can you hand me the cinnamon powder?” Seonghwa asked, far too focused on the plating of his latest creation even though you were going to devour it in seconds. You told him exactly that as he sprinkled some on the pancakes, making sure the strawberries were set before drizzling chocolate over them.

“Perfect,” his eyes twinkled with the sort of gleam you used to see only when he was about to take someone’s life.

How the tables had turned.

“It’s just breakfast, Seonghwa, it doesn’t have to be that serious-”

“Shh,” he waved a hand in dismissal. “We need a good meal to be in good spirits. And then we can go and shed some blood- Assemblyman Hwang should not have used street gangs to try to expose our network.”

You shook your head, agreeing, but still amused as you watched him pour the freshly blended fruit juice into your glasses.

“Now eat,” he ordered and you bowed mockingly with a ‘yessir’ before you dived in.

The angel had definitely rubbed off on Seonghwa, because there was no other explanation to this. Soon after Seonghwa recovered, he was back to business, making new deals and expanding his network further as if he had some newfound energy- or perhaps, he was making up for the lost time. Whatever it was, you wouldn’t be complaining- you were simply glad that he was back.

Though he was a bit different. Gentler, yet still very Seonghwa with his demanding personality. He also picked up cooking, reminding you of your teenage days when he used to make whatever he could with whatever you had at disposal. He was always creative with his meals, but now, his creative freedom was almost surprising.

Park Seonghwa was back, but a changed man. Still insanely evil at the very core, still driven by his blood thirst and hunger for power. Maybe he had changed only where it concerned you- more welcoming towards you, more understanding of your actions, and so, so loving. His love was as gentle as the angel at times, and as fierce as Seonghwa’s devotion. Sometimes, you were reminded of Hwa- it was a given when they had worn the same skin.

But your Seonghwa was still very human. And that was all that mattered. His love did not burn you and he did not fear anyone.

You finished your meals and went to get ready to go out with him- he was letting you accompany him to his ‘little outings’ more and though he wasn’t getting his hands dirty most of the time, the lackeys doing that for him, he still liked going out in the field himself every once in a while. Today was one of those days and you went to your own room to arm yourself.

Seonghwa got ready first, waiting for you in the lobby, staring at the holy sword that was now a showpiece, perched on one of the walls. He felt almost compelled to trace the hilt of the sword, daring to touch the blade that was capable of harming angels, and with a little shriek he drew his hand back, the tips of his fingers an angry red, burned by the sword.

Seonghwa cursed under his breath, moving to the kitchen for some privacy before muttering the prayer he had said for aeons now, allowing his fingertips to heal. He caught his reflection on the glossy material of the fridge, his pupils glowing and he shut them, taking a few deep breaths to get his powers under control.

He heard the faint thumps of your footsteps as you came downstairs and he fixed his posture and his expressions to mimic Seonghwa before he stepped out of the kitchen, nodding in approval when you showed him your weapons before following you outside.

He let you call you by the name of the human that he was not, and he willingly played along, letting you think that your beloved human had defeated the angel when that was not the case at all. Your beloved human was gone.

Good and evil must coexist in order to survive. But sometimes, the good becomes the evil and the evil becomes the good- they were never meant to balance each other.

It was only a matter of which one would weigh more and tip the scale in its favour.

#the way i almost forgot to post 💀#seonghwa x reader #seonghwa angst #park seonghwa x reader #park seonghwa angst #seonghwa #park seonghwa #ateez #ateez x reader #ateez au #ateez fanfic #ateez fic #ateez angst #ateez scenarios #ateez imagines #ateez ff #ateez mafia au #not proofread so don't come at me

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esotericalchemist · 3 months ago

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𝐒𝐮𝐧 + 𝐌𝐨𝐨𝐧 - 𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐢𝐧 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 ✧˖°.

Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)

DISCLAIMER:

Please note that the descriptions provided here are general and based on the combination of Sun and Moon signs only. The complete picture of your personality and life experiences is also influenced by the specific house placements and aspects of these planets, as well as other factors in your astrological chart.

☘︎ 𝐀𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐒𝐮𝐧 ☘︎

Aries Moon: A naturally energetic and fearless go-getter, always ready to take charge and dive headfirst into new adventures.

Taurus Moon: A determined and grounded individual who balances Aries’ boldness with Taurus’ steady nature, enjoying both excitement and the comfort of familiar routines while steadily working toward their goals.

Gemini Moon: A lively and quick-thinker, constantly on the move and eager to explore new ideas, mixing Aries’ enthusiasm with Gemini’s curiosity and adaptability.

Cancer Moon: A fiery yet nurturing soul who puts their energy into caring for loved ones and building a secure home, balancing ambition with deep emotional bonds.

Leo Moon: A naturally charismatic and confident leader who thrives in the spotlight, blending Aries’ courage with Leo’s flair for creativity and love of attention.

Virgo Moon: A highly motivated and efficient person, combining Aries’ boldness with Virgo’s precision, always aiming for perfection while chasing ambitious goals.

Libra Moon: A natural leader who values relationships and harmony, skillfully balancing assertiveness with a desire for fairness, often working to create peace while achieving their goals.

Scorpio Moon: A fiercely determined individual with an intense, magnetic presence, unafraid of deep emotional experiences and driven by a strong will to achieve what they desire.

Sagittarius Moon: An adventurous and free-spirited personality, always on the lookout for new experiences, driven by a love for exploration and a desire to broaden their horizons.

Capricorn Moon: A disciplined and ambitious person who channels their Aries energy into achieving long-term success, skillfully blending boldness with strategic planning.

Aquarius Moon: A bold and innovative thinker who values freedom and originality, often leading by challenging norms and bringing fresh, unconventional ideas to the table.

Pisces Moon: A dynamic dreamer who mixes Aries’ drive with Pisces’ imagination and empathy, often inspired by a higher purpose and motivated by both passion and compassion.

☘︎ 𝐓𝐚𝐮𝐫𝐮𝐬 𝐒𝐮𝐧 ☘︎

Aries Moon: A determined and action-oriented personality, blending a natural patience with a proactive drive, always ready to step up and tackle challenges head-on with confidence.

Taurus Moon: A deeply rooted individual who exudes stability and comfort, with a strong appreciation for life’s pleasures, always seeking to create a secure and materially satisfying environment.

Gemini Moon: A grounded yet curious person, balancing a love for learning and intellectual variety with a need for consistency and comfort in their surroundings.

Cancer Moon: A nurturing and dependable personality, combining a love for stability with deep emotional ties, always focused on building a warm, secure, and supportive environment for loved ones.

Leo Moon: A confident and creative individual who enjoys both the comforts of luxury and the thrill of being in the spotlight, seamlessly blending a love for the finer things with a desire for recognition and self-expression.

Virgo Moon: A practical and meticulous person who brings a methodical approach to everything they do, combining a steady, grounded nature with a strong attention to detail, always striving for a secure and well-organized life.

Libra Moon: A person who deeply values harmony and beauty, seamlessly integrating a practical mindset with an appreciation for balance and aesthetics, both in their relationships and their environment.

Scorpio Moon: A passionate and intense individual, driven by a powerful determination and a deep emotional core, unafraid to dive into transformative experiences that push them to grow.

Sagittarius Moon: A grounded yet adventurous personality, balancing a love for stability with a thirst for new experiences and intellectual growth, always seeking to expand their horizons while staying rooted.

Capricorn Moon: A highly disciplined and ambitious individual, combining a strong drive for comfort and security with a relentless pursuit of long-term success, always planning and working toward their goals.

Aquarius Moon: A unique and independent thinker, blending a steady, practical nature with a forward-thinking, innovative approach to life, always challenging the status quo with fresh ideas.

Pisces Moon: A compassionate and imaginative individual, mixing a grounded sense of reality with a dreamy, intuitive perspective, often striving to create a peaceful, beautiful, and emotionally rich life.

☘︎ 𝐆𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐢 𝐒𝐮𝐧 ☘︎

Aries Moon: Always bursting with energy, this person thrives on exploring new ideas and is quick to jump into action, driven by an insatiable curiosity and a need to keep things moving forward.

Taurus Moon: A naturally social individual who loves engaging in conversation, yet they also appreciate the comfort and stability of a secure environment, balancing their active social life with a strong desire for consistency.

Gemini Moon: Someone who is constantly on the lookout for new information and experiences, driven by a restless energy that craves variety and thrives on learning and adapting to new situations.

Cancer Moon: A warm and communicative individual who uses conversation as a way to connect deeply with others, blending a love for social interaction with a nurturing and emotionally supportive nature.

Leo Moon: Charismatic and naturally drawn to the spotlight, this person combines a sharp wit with a love for drama and self-expression, enjoying the attention that comes with being the center of social situations.

Virgo Moon: A detail-oriented thinker who excels at analyzing and communicating ideas, this person carefully balances their curiosity with a practical and precise approach to problem-solving and daily life.

Libra Moon: With a natural charm and a strong sense of diplomacy, this person thrives in social settings, effortlessly blending a love for interaction with a deep commitment to fairness and harmonious relationships.

Scorpio Moon: Intensely curious and drawn to uncovering hidden truths, this individual combines a passion for learning with a deep, investigative nature that often leads them to explore life’s deeper mysteries.

Sagittarius Moon: Always eager to explore new ideas and broaden their horizons, this adventurous person blends intellectual curiosity with a love for experiencing new cultures, philosophies, and perspectives.

Capricorn Moon: Strategic and highly disciplined, this person combines their adaptable nature with a strong focus on long-term goals, using their communication skills to achieve practical and well-thought-out outcomes.

Aquarius Moon: An independent and innovative thinker, this person values originality and is always on the lookout for new, unconventional approaches to ideas and situations, often challenging the status quo.

Pisces Moon: Versatile and deeply imaginative, this individual blends a quick, adaptable mind with a dreamy, intuitive nature, often finding themselves drawn to creative and spiritual pursuits that allow them to explore beyond the ordinary.

☘︎ 𝐂𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐒𝐮𝐧 ☘︎

Aries Moon: A nurturing yet assertive personality, combining a deep care for loved ones with a bold drive to take action, often stepping up courageously to protect and support those they hold dear.

Taurus Moon: A deeply caring and stable individual who blends emotional depth with a strong desire for comfort and security, creating a warm and loving environment where others feel safe and cherished.

Gemini Moon: A sensitive and communicative person who balances a nurturing nature with curiosity and adaptability, often using meaningful conversations and intellectual engagement to connect emotionally with others.

Cancer Moon: A highly intuitive and emotionally driven individual who is profoundly connected to family and home, embodying the essence of nurturing and protection with an unwavering dedication to the well-being of loved ones.

Leo Moon: A warm and generous personality who merges a deep care for others with a desire for recognition, often leading with kindness and pride, while taking on a strong sense of responsibility toward those they love.

Virgo Moon: : A caring and practical individual who combines emotional depth with a keen attention to detail, often focusing on providing thoughtful care and support, and working tirelessly to improve the well-being of those around them.

Libra Moon: A harmonious and empathetic personality who blends nurturing instincts with a love for balance and relationships, often creating peaceful and loving connections that are both supportive and fulfilling.

Scorpio Moon: A deeply emotional and intense individual who combines a nurturing nature with a passionate depth, forming powerful and transformative bonds with those they care about, often driven by a profound sense of loyalty and protection.

Sagittarius Moon: A nurturing yet adventurous person who blends a strong care for home and family with a love for exploration and new experiences, often seeking to broaden their emotional horizons while maintaining strong, secure roots.

Capricorn Moon: A responsible and emotionally grounded individual who combines a deep care for loved ones with a focus on long-term goals and stability, often working diligently to create a secure and prosperous future for themselves and their family.

Aquarius Moon: A nurturing yet independent personality who merges emotional depth with a unique and unconventional approach to life, often bringing a fresh and progressive perspective to relationships and caregiving.

Pisces Moon: A deeply compassionate and intuitive individual who blends nurturing instincts with empathy and imagination, often providing emotional and spiritual support through creativity, kindness, and a profound understanding of others’ needs.

☘︎ 𝐋𝐞𝐨 𝐒𝐮𝐧 ☘︎

Aries Moon: A bold and confident individual who effortlessly combines a need for recognition with a drive for action, often taking the lead with enthusiasm, boundless energy, and a courageous spirit.

Taurus Moon: A charismatic and determined person who blends a love for the spotlight with a strong desire for stability and comfort, often pursuing their goals with a mix of persistence, charm, and an appreciation for life’s finer things.

Gemini Moon: A lively and expressive personality who thrives in social situations, combining a need for attention with curiosity and adaptability, often excelling in communication and intellectual pursuits while keeping others entertained.

Cancer Moon: A warm and nurturing individual who merges natural charisma with deep emotional connections, often leading with both heart and creativity, showing genuine care and generosity to those around them.

Leo Moon: A highly confident and dramatic person who fully embodies the essence of Leo, with a powerful desire for admiration, creativity, and self-expression, often shining brightly in any spotlight they find themselves in.

Virgo Moon: : A practical yet proud individual who blends a love for recognition with a keen attention to detail, often striving for perfection in their work and public image, with a strong focus on achieving excellence in everything they do.

Libra Moon: A charming and diplomatic personality who effortlessly combines a flair for drama with a love for harmony and relationships, often excelling in social situations, partnerships, and creative endeavors, always with a touch of elegance.

Scorpio Moon: A powerful and intense individual who blends a need for recognition with deep emotional depth, often commanding attention with a strong presence, passionate energy, and a magnetic aura that draws others in.

Sagittarius Moon: A vibrant and adventurous person who merges a desire for the spotlight with a love for exploration and freedom, often inspiring others with their enthusiasm, joy, and zest for life, always seeking new experiences.

Capricorn Moon: A disciplined and ambitious individual who combines a need for recognition with a strong focus on long-term success, often working tirelessly to achieve their goals, rise to positions of power, and earn the respect of others.

Aquarius Moon: A unique and visionary personality who blends natural charisma with innovative thinking, often leading with creativity, originality, and a desire to bring about positive change in the world.

Pisces Moon: A creative and compassionate person who mixes a love for self-expression with deep sensitivity, often inspiring others through their artistic talents, empathy, and imaginative approach to both life and relationships.

☘︎ 𝐕𝐢𝐫𝐠𝐨 𝐒𝐮𝐧 ☘︎

Aries Moon: A practical yet assertive personality who blends a keen attention to detail with a strong drive for action, often taking the initiative in a methodical and decisive manner to ensure tasks are completed with precision and efficiency.

Taurus Moon: A grounded and reliable individual who combines meticulousness with a deep love for stability and comfort, often focusing on creating a well-ordered, pleasant life through persistence and thoughtful care in everything they do.

Gemini Moon: A highly analytical and communicative person who excels in areas requiring both intellect and adaptability, thriving in dynamic, mentally stimulating environments by blending precision with a natural curiosity.

Cancer Moon: A nurturing yet detail-oriented personality who merges practicality with emotional depth, often caring for others in an organized and thoughtful way, with a strong focus on creating a secure and harmonious environment.

Leo Moon: A hardworking and confident individual who combines a focus on service with a desire for recognition, often striving for excellence and acknowledgment in their efforts, while demonstrating leadership and a drive for perfection.

Virgo Moon: : A deeply methodical and precise person who fully embodies the essence of Virgo, with an intense focus on perfection, organization, and self-improvement, always dedicated to maintaining order and pursuing personal growth.

Libra Moon: A harmonious and thoughtful personality who blends attention to detail with a love for balance and relationships, often excelling in creating aesthetically pleasing, well-organized spaces, and showing a natural social grace.

Scorpio Moon: A perceptive and intense individual who combines an analytical nature with emotional depth, often driven to uncover the truth and solve complex problems with a high level of precision and determination.

Sagittarius Moon: A practical yet adventurous personality who merges meticulousness with a love for exploration, often seeking to expand their knowledge in a methodical and structured way, always eager to learn and grow.

Capricorn Moon: A disciplined and ambitious individual who combines a strong attention to detail with a focus on long-term goals, often working diligently to achieve success and recognition through careful planning and persistent effort.

Aquarius Moon: A detail-oriented yet innovative person who blends practicality with a forward-thinking approach, often excelling in areas that require both precision and originality, with a focus on creative problem-solving and fresh ideas.

Pisces Moon: A practical yet compassionate individual who combines meticulousness with deep empathy, often focusing on serving others while maintaining a strong sense of understanding and care, using their sensitivity to make a meaningful impact.

☘︎ 𝐋𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚 𝐒𝐮𝐧 ☘︎

Aries Moon: A charming yet assertive personality who blends a love for harmony with a strong drive for action, often taking the lead in social situations while striving to maintain balance and assert their leadership skills.

Taurus Moon: A harmonious and stable individual who combines a desire for balance with a love for beauty and comfort, often creating environments that are both aesthetically pleasing and secure, filled with a sense of luxury and peace.

Gemini Moon: A sociable and intellectually curious person who thrives in dynamic social settings, blending a focus on relationships with a natural adaptability, often excelling in communication and enjoying lively intellectual exchanges.

Cancer Moon: A caring and empathetic personality who merges a focus on harmony with deep emotional sensitivity, often nurturing relationships with great care and prioritizing the emotional well-being and security of those they love.

Leo Moon: A charismatic and diplomatic individual who effortlessly combines a love for balance with a flair for drama and recognition, often excelling in leadership roles and social interactions where charm and a commanding presence are key.

Virgo Moon: : A thoughtful and precise personality who blends a desire for harmony with a meticulous attention to detail, often striving for perfection in both relationships and environments, with a strong focus on aesthetics and order.

Libra Moon: A deeply harmonious and diplomatic person who fully embodies the essence of balance, beauty, and relationships, often creating environments of peace and understanding that reflect a deep commitment to fairness and connection.

Scorpio Moon: A magnetic and intense individual who merges a love for relationships with emotional depth, often forming deep, transformative connections that are both powerful and profoundly impactful.

Sagittarius Moon: A sociable and adventurous personality who combines a love for harmony with a passion for exploration, often seeking new experiences and broadening their horizons through meaningful relationships and travel.

Capricorn Moon: A disciplined and responsible individual who blends a focus on relationships with a strong ambition, often striving for long-term success through structured, collaborative efforts, while maintaining a balanced approach to life.

Aquarius Moon: A social and innovative thinker who merges a love for harmony with a forward-thinking approach, often bringing unique and creative ideas to relationships and social causes, with a focus on vision and progress.

Pisces Moon: A compassionate and artistic individual who combines a desire for beauty with deep empathy and imagination, often creating harmonious and emotionally fulfilling relationships through creativity and a sensitive, caring approach.

☘︎ 𝐒𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐩𝐢𝐨 𝐒𝐮𝐧 ☘��

Aries Moon: A fiercely determined and passionate individual who combines deep emotional intensity with a bold and direct approach, often taking decisive actions driven by strong convictions and a powerful sense of urgency.

Taurus Moon: A strong-willed and deeply rooted person who blends unwavering persistence with a stable, patient demeanor, often pursuing their desires with a grounded and tenacious approach to life.

Gemini Moon: A sharp and inquisitive personality who mixes emotional depth with curiosity and adaptability, often excelling at uncovering hidden truths and engaging in deep, meaningful conversations.

Cancer Moon: A deeply emotional and nurturing individual who combines intense feelings with a caring and protective nature, often forming strong, protective bonds with loved ones and offering unwavering support in times of need.

Leo Moon: A powerful and charismatic personality who blends intense emotions with a desire for recognition and admiration, often commanding attention with their magnetic presence and emotional depth.

Virgo Moon: : A perceptive and meticulous person who combines a strong investigative nature with precision and practicality, often striving for perfection and gaining a deep understanding of complex systems and issues.

Libra Moon: A magnetic and diplomatic individual who blends emotional intensity with charm and a focus on harmony, often excelling in relationships where depth, balance, and passion are central.

Scorpio Moon: A profoundly intense and mysterious person who fully embodies the essence of Scorpio, with a powerful focus on transformation, emotional depth, and exploring life’s hidden and mystical forces.

Sagittarius Moon: A passionate and adventurous individual who mixes emotional intensity with a love for exploration and broader perspectives, often seeking deeper truths through new experiences and philosophical inquiry.

Capricorn Moon: A determined and strategic personality who combines emotional depth with disciplined ambition, often working tirelessly toward long-term goals with a focused and resilient approach.

Aquarius Moon: A fiercely independent and unconventional person who blends emotional intensity with innovative, forward-thinking ideas, often challenging societal norms and embracing unique concepts with a deep sense of purpose.

Pisces Moon: A deeply emotional and intuitive individual who merges intense feelings with sensitivity and imagination, often drawn to the mystical, spiritual, and creative aspects of life, offering profound insight and empathy.

☘︎ 𝐒𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐬 𝐒𝐮𝐧 ☘︎

Aries Moon: A bold and adventurous individual who blends a love for exploration with a strong drive for action, often diving into new experiences with enthusiasm, taking spontaneous and fearless leaps into the unknown.

Taurus Moon: An optimistic yet grounded person who balances a love for adventure with a desire for stability and comfort, often enjoying life’s pleasures while maintaining a steady approach to exploring new opportunities.

Gemini Moon: A curious and lively personality who thrives in dynamic, intellectually stimulating environments, blending a love for big ideas with an adaptable nature, excelling in learning, teaching, and communication.

Cancer Moon: An adventurous yet nurturing individual who seeks to explore the world while staying emotionally connected to loved ones, balancing a love for freedom with a strong attachment to home and family.

Leo Moon: A charismatic and optimistic person who leads with enthusiasm, combining an adventurous spirit with a flair for recognition and self-expression, often inspiring others through creativity and a bold, confident outlook on life.

Virgo Moon: : An inquisitive and practical individual who excels in areas requiring both broad vision and meticulous precision, blending a quest for knowledge with a methodical approach to learning and discovery.

Libra Moon: A sociable and open-minded personality who thrives in social interactions, blending a love for exploration with a focus on harmony and relationships, often fostering positive connections and seeking new experiences through the people they meet.

Scorpio Moon: An intense and adventurous individual driven by a quest for truth and emotional depth, often seeking profound and transformative experiences as they explore life’s mysteries and uncover deeper truths.

Sagittarius Moon: A highly adventurous and optimistic person who fully embodies the essence of Sagittarius, with an intense focus on freedom, exploration, and the pursuit of higher knowledge and wisdom, often chasing life’s big questions with passion and zeal.

Capricorn Moon: An ambitious and optimistic personality who blends an expansive vision with a disciplined approach, often working diligently towards achieving grand visions and long-term goals with enthusiasm and perseverance.

Aquarius Moon: An independent and visionary individual who combines a love for freedom with innovative and progressive thinking, often leading with unconventional ideas and a strong desire to bring about social change and embrace individuality.

Pisces Moon: An idealistic and compassionate personality who explores spiritual or artistic paths with a deep sense of purpose, blending a quest for meaning with sensitivity and creativity, often driven by empathy and imagination.

☘︎ 𝐂𝐚𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐒𝐮𝐧 ☘︎

Aries Moon: A disciplined and ambitious personality who blends a focus on long-term goals with a strong drive for immediate action, often pursuing their ambitions with a mix of determination, strategic planning, and a competitive spirit that pushes them to succeed.

Taurus Moon: A practical and steadfast individual who combines ambition with a deep love for stability and comfort, often working steadily toward success with patience and persistence, all while focusing on building a secure and prosperous life.

Gemini Moon: A strategic and versatile personality who blends a disciplined approach with adaptability and intellectual curiosity, often excelling in environments that require both careful planning and quick thinking, making them adept at navigating complex situations.

Cancer Moon: A responsible and nurturing individual who balances ambition with emotional depth and care, often harmonizing their professional goals with a deep commitment to family, creating a supportive and secure environment for loved ones.

Leo Moon: A confident and authoritative personality who combines a strong focus on achievement with a need for recognition and charisma, often leading with determination and seeking out leadership roles where they can both achieve success and gain admiration from others.

Virgo Moon: : A meticulous and hardworking individual who blends ambition with a keen attention to detail and practicality, often excelling in tasks that require precision, thoroughness, and careful long-term planning, ensuring that every aspect of their work is flawless.

Libra Moon: A disciplined yet diplomatic personality who mixes a strong focus on success with a love for harmony and relationships, often achieving their goals through balanced partnerships, effective collaboration, and strategic social interactions that foster mutual benefit.

Scorpio Moon: A determined and intense individual who combines ambition with deep emotional focus, often pursuing their goals with relentless drive and strategic precision, while also embracing a powerful commitment to personal and professional transformation.

Sagittarius Moon: An ambitious yet optimistic personality who blends a disciplined approach to life with a love for exploration and broad vision, often striving for success while simultaneously seeking to expand their horizons and embrace new opportunities.

Capricorn Moon: A highly disciplined and goal-oriented individual who fully embodies the essence of Capricorn, with a relentless focus on achievement, structure, and long-term success, often meticulously planning every step to ensure they reach their ambitions.

Aquarius Moon: A pragmatic yet innovative personality who combines ambition with a forward-thinking and visionary approach, often leading with a focus on future progress, social impact, and original ideas that push the boundaries of conventional success.

Pisces Moon: A compassionate and disciplined individual who blends a strong drive for achievement with deep empathy and creativity, often striving to reach goals that are not only practical but also meaningful, aiming to make a positive impact on others.

☘︎ 𝐀𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐬 𝐒𝐮𝐧 ☘︎

Aries Moon: An independent and dynamic personality who combines innovative thinking with boldness and a strong drive for action, often leading with originality and fearlessly tackling new challenges and ideas.

Taurus Moon: A forward-thinking yet grounded individual who blends a visionary nature with a need for stability and practicality, often pursuing innovative ideas while ensuring they are sustainable and secure in the long run.

Gemini Moon: A highly intellectual and adaptable person who mixes a progressive outlook with curiosity and versatility, often thriving in environments that encourage communication, learning, and the exchange of fresh, new ideas.

Cancer Moon: An innovative yet nurturing individual who combines progressive thinking with emotional depth and care, often focusing on using forward-thinking approaches to enhance the well-being of loved ones and the broader community.

Leo Moon: A charismatic and original personality who blends an unconventional approach with a need for recognition and creativity, often leading with a unique style and a strong sense of individuality that sets them apart from the crowd.

Virgo Moon: : A logical and detail-oriented individual who merges visionary ideas with precision and a methodical approach, often excelling in fields that require both innovation and careful, strategic planning.

Libra Moon: A socially aware and diplomatic personality who combines progressive ideals with a love for harmony and relationships, often advocating for social justice, fairness, and balanced, equitable connections.

Scorpio Moon: An intense and independent individual who blends unconventional thinking with emotional depth and focus, often driven to explore profound and transformative ideas that challenge existing norms and push boundaries.

Sagittarius Moon: An adventurous and visionary personality who combines a love for innovation with a quest for knowledge and exploration, often pursuing new horizons with enthusiasm, optimism, and a strong focus on the future.

Capricorn Moon: A pragmatic yet forward-thinking individual who blends an innovative spirit with a disciplined approach and ambition, often working towards long-term goals that align with their vision for societal progress and improvement.

Aquarius Moon: A highly independent and original personality who fully embodies the essence of Aquarius, with a strong focus on innovation, individuality, social consciousness, and a desire to challenge and redefine traditional norms.

Pisces Moon: A compassionate and visionary individual who combines progressive thinking with deep empathy and creativity, often striving to create a better world through innovative solutions that are both emotionally and socially impactful.

☘︎ 𝐏𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐒𝐮𝐧 ☘︎

Aries Moon: A dreamy yet assertive personality who combines a rich imagination and deep compassion with a strong drive for action, often pursuing their visions with passion, spontaneity, and a dynamic approach to life that keeps them constantly moving forward.

Taurus Moon: A compassionate and grounded individual who blends deep empathy and emotional depth with a love for stability and security, often creating a peaceful and nurturing environment where both they and others can feel safe and supported.

Gemini Moon: A versatile and imaginative personality who mixes creativity with curiosity and adaptability, often excelling in communication, artistic expression, and intellectual pursuits, thriving in environments that encourage learning and creative exploration.

Cancer Moon: A deeply sensitive and nurturing individual who combines profound empathy with emotional depth and protective instincts, often focusing on caring for others and creating a loving, supportive home environment that fosters strong, emotional connections.

Leo Moon: A creative and expressive personality who blends an artistic nature with a need for recognition and self-expression, often using their talents to inspire, entertain, and captivate others, while enjoying the spotlight that their creativity brings.

Virgo Moon: : A compassionate yet practical individual who combines deep empathy with a meticulous attention to detail and a service-oriented mindset, often focusing on helping others through thoughtful and well-organized efforts that make a real difference.

Libra Moon: A harmonious and empathetic personality who blends sensitivity with a love for balance, beauty, and relationships, often excelling in creating loving, peaceful connections and pursuing artistic endeavors that reflect their appreciation for harmony.

Scorpio Moon: A deeply emotional and intuitive individual who combines empathy with intensity and depth, often drawn to exploring the mysteries of life and forming profound, transformative connections that leave a lasting impact.

Sagittarius Moon: A spiritual and adventurous personality who blends a quest for meaning with a love for exploration and freedom, often seeking to expand their horizons through travel, learning, and spiritual growth, always driven by a desire to understand the world more deeply.

Capricorn Moon: A compassionate yet disciplined individual who merges empathy with ambition and a focus on achievement, often striving to reach meaningful goals that positively impact others while maintaining a strong sense of responsibility and purpose.

Aquarius Moon: A visionary and empathetic personality who blends creativity with an innovative, forward-thinking approach, often working toward progressive change and humanitarian goals, driven by a strong sense of compassion and a desire to make the world a better place.

Pisces Moon: A profoundly intuitive and empathetic individual who fully embodies the essence of Pisces, with a strong focus on spirituality, creativity, and deep emotional connections, often guided by a rich inner world and a deep sense of empathy that shapes their interactions with others.

Masterlist

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