#uh ooohhhh

[iamfruitie]

In Too Deep Chapter 36

Home Visit

“Do you think he’s going to tell?” Phantom asked Mare as the two stood in the kitchen the next morning. 

“He had to have believed us.” Mare sat down on the table. “There’s no reason that he wouldn’t.” 

“I’m shocked you didn’t try to fight him when he hoisted Mad up like that.” Phantom chuckled.

“Literally had to bite my own tongue.” Mare sighed. “That was the best acting performance we have put on in a long time.” 

“And we’ll still have to keep it up when we get back.” Phantom chewed on his lip. “Should probably make sure our stories are exactly the same before we go.” 

“We’re good at bullshitting with each other, but Dark is better at poking through the holes,” Mare said in agreement. 

“He knows our tricks 'cause he taught us most of them.” Phantom clicked his tongue. “We going the ‘one-night stand’ route?” 

“Dark’s not gonna want details on that stuff. We can usually distract him if we get dirty with our language.” Mare couldn’t help from being a little silly and doing a shimmy with that, getting Phantom to laugh. 

“You’d think with Wilford being his friend, he’d be used to that stuff.” Phantom made a face to tell Mare that someone was coming into the room. 

“We’ll work on it on the way there.” Mare kept his wording vague and turned his head, seeing Jackie walk into the kitchen. 

“Normally, I would stay out of other’s business, but I have a feeling what you two are talking about involves me and Mad,” Jackie said, having only caught the very end of the conversation. “It has to do with what happened last night, doesn’t it?” 

“You don’t need to worry about what happened last night,” Phantom said. “We have it covered.” 

“Have what covered? What’s going on? I know you two have the whole vampire thing going on, but does that mean something bad if the other ones figure out you’re with us? Do I need to hide Mad somewhere until it’s safe? He might know some basics of fighting, but he can only do so much, especially if he can’t get to his hammer. He’s fucked without it.” Jackie’s voice was thick with worry. He could take care of himself, he was a big guy that knew how to throw a damn good punch, but Mad was small, a scientist, he wasn’t one for fighting and could easily get hurt. 

“We got this, I promise.” Phantom went over to Jackie, placing his hands on his face to make him look at him. “The man that was over here last night, Wilford, he’s practically harmless. He’s just chaotic in the same way me and Mare are. He’s not going to do anything. Let’s get you home so you can get cleaned up, and then I’ll come over tonight and mess you all up again~”  

“Alright.” Jackie had a bit of a blush on his cheeks. “As long as Mad doesn’t get hurt.” 

“He won’t. Not while Mare likes his ass.” Phantom giggled and gave Jackie a quick kiss.

“Gross.” Mare made a face as he got off the table. “Let’s get going before you make me barf.” 

“Don’t be such a drama king.” 

“I will aim the puke at you.” 

“Rude!” 

x~x~x

From the outside, this home would have looked like an elderly house of sorts. Large, antique, and with a long list of history to it. All of that is correct, but the city that was many miles away didn’t know who lived inside this aged place. What they are and what they do. 

“Honey, I’m home!” Phantom called out with a laugh as he and Mare appeared at the front door.

“Hello!” A voice said inside of their heads, and they both turned to see a fellow vampire named JJ. He was about the same size as Mad, but with a mustache, hair hidden by a round hat, and dressed more formally with a button-up and vest. He also was unable to speak unless it was done through telepathic means. “Dark is in his office and is waiting for you.” 

“Thanks.” Mare flashed a smile at JJ. He’s always been fond of him, one of the kindest of the vampires in the home.  

“Might want to hurry, he’s annoyed~” Wilford came out from one of the nearby halls, singing the last word as he wrapped an arm around JJ’s shoulders, whispering something to him that got the smaller man to blush, giggle, and walk off with him. 

“Great. He’s in a mood.” Phantom clicked his tongue. “How bad do you think it’d be if we just left?” 

“You like living?” Mare asked with a raised brow. 

“Yeah.” Phantom held out the word with a groan, heading for the office with Mare in tow. 

“Come in.” A voice said from behind the door Mare knocked on. “Oh. Look who finally came home.” 

“Hey, Dark.” Mare gave an extra-large smile to Dark, hoping to get on his good side. 

“Where have you been?” The flatness in Dark’s voice told Mare that did not work. 

Dark was a fairly large man like Wilford, be it a few inches shorter and leaner, but still had a bit of size compared to Mare and Phantom. He, like JJ, was more often than not formally dressed in a suit of sorts. His ‘casual’ was slacks and a button-up with no tie. Mare had asked why Dark dressed the way a long time ago before he and Phantom were turned, and Dark had told him 

“I am in charge of everyone. I lead, I control, and I ensure the safety and stability of us all. I must look as together as we are to be”

Mare was a teenager at the time and didn’t understand, he still didn’t understand now, but at this point, it was just what was expected of Dark.   

“We were out having some fun,” Mare answered with a shrug. 

“A lot of fun~” Phantom giggled, seeing the look on Dark’s face from the implication. 

“We can tell you all of the lovely details if you want. Like how-

“No. No, I do not.” Dark cut him off before rising from behind his desk. “What I do want is for the two of you to stay here at the home until told otherwise.” 

“Are you grounding us or something? What the fuck’s going on?” Mare asked. 

“Language, Mare,” Dark said, hands going behind his back as he started to walk. “And you are not grounded; everyone is to stay in place until I sort a dangerous manner out. It won’t be long. It will likely be finished and taken care of by this afternoon.” 

“What ‘dangerous manner’ are you talking about?” Phantom asked. 

“I will explain when it is no longer a threat to us.” 

“But-” Mare didn’t even get his protest out before Dark was gone. “I have a bad feeling. Do you think Anti’s in their bedroom?” 

“Probably, and he has to know what’s going on. Dark tells him everything.” 

“Either him or Wilford. Anti’s more likely to tell us since Wilford’s probably busy with JJ.” 

“Let’s go,” Phantom said with a nod, and they both used their powers to appear in front of Dark and Anti’s bedroom door. They shared a glance before they both turned and started banging on the door.

“Mom!” They called out.

“You shits!” The person behind the door shouted and threw open the door. “I told you two to stop calling me that.” 

“But mom~!” Mare and Phantom held out the word in unison, something they’d done plenty of times. 

“What do you two want?” Anti crossed his arms.

He was one of the average-sized vampires in the home, not tiny like JJ but not large like Wilford and Dark. He was maybe an inch or so shorter than Mare and Phantom, with hair a bright green and fangs sticking out much more than the others. Unlike his husband, Anti was very casual in his attire. Ripped jeans and a t-shirt with gauges in his almost pointed ears. There was a faded scar on his neck, a reminder of why he had been turned in the first place. That scar was next to his mate mark and the teeth scars from his turning. 

Dark, Wilford, and JJ all had those last two kinds of marks as well, but Anti’s stood out since he had more markings there than the others. Phantom and Mare only had turn marks. 

“Where’s Dark going?” Mare asked outright, knowing it was a lot easier that way. 

“To take care of something.” Anti’s eyes went to the side, his dead giveaway that he wasn’t saying everything that he knew. 

“He said it was a ‘dangerous manner’, what’s going on?” Phantom asked with a bit of a pout. The twins were more than aware that Anti had a weak spot for Phantom while Dark’s was for Mare, and they took full advantage of it whenever they could. “Are we going to be okay?” 

“Phan.” Anti sighed. The use of the nickname told Mare and Phantom that Anti already cracked. “It’s going to be okay, I promise. There’s just been some human trying to dig into our business, and Dark wants to go take care of it before it could turn into something harmful for us.” 

“Do you know who this human is?” Mare had a really bad feeling. 

“Some rich guy named Madrick.” 

“Madrick Richards?”

“Yeah, how did you-” 

“Fuck!” 

-----------

Tag List: (Feel free to ask to be added!)

@dungeon-dragons-dragons @justyoursicanon @angst-anonn @damnthedead

[em1e]

mitsuya knows he's been awake for too long when he can smell the coffee brewing from the kitchen, set on a timed start for 6 am to be nice and warm for you when you wake up at 7.

[tr4gictea]

True Meaning: Act I, Part II

Isekai teen!reader + Genshin Impact

❥Masterlist

Tags: Panic Attack, Reader has an existential crisis, Agnst with comfort, Arataki Gang being silly :P

Including: Itto, The Arataki Gang, and Kuki Shinobu

word count: 2,522 words

A/n: Heyyyy guess who wrote this in two hours <3 (I'm kinda proud of myself for that) And I would like to thank you for the love on part one of this series <3 and other will be a poll at the end of the story for which twin you guys would like to have as the traveler and if you guys want me to write about the two days the reader had with Itto and the gang leave a comment. This short story will be posted along with my normal uploads.

Pervious | Next

True Meaning Table of Content ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡

“Here it is, in all its pride and glory! The Otogi Ramen Stand!” The gang leader said presenting the run-down ramen stall. “Get whatever you’d like we can cover it.” He said with a chuckle. You looked down at the prices, which were between 100 mora and 500. He probably took you here for the cheap price since he doesn't have a deep pocket.

You scanned over the menu looking at all the food but one dish in particular caught your eye. “One bowl of chili oil and beef ramen please.” You heard a gasp behind you as you ordered. Behind you, the boys had their hands on their chests while others had their faces in their hands. They looked like mothers from the 1800s when their kids tells them they're gay. “Um, you guys alright?”

“No! You just disrespected the auxiliary member of the Arataki Gang!” One of the members said while pointing an accusatory finger at you.

Auxiliary member? I don’t remember one of those in the gang. And how would I be disrespecting them by ordering that dish? Maybe I am still dreaming.

“Guys she doesn’t know yet so don’t be too hard on her,” Itto turns back to you. “The Auxiliary Member of the Arataki Gang is my buddy Ushi.” He punches the air and a flash of yellow light appears only to be replaced by a small bull. Ooohhhh, that Ushi! Itto’s bull. “(Y/n), Ushi, Ushi, (Y/n). As you can see Ushi is part bull so we find it a little disrespectful for someone to eat beef.”

“Oh okay, no problem,” You turn back to the seller, “Then instead I will have a chili oil and pork ramen bowl.” The seller, who has been listening to your strange conversation the entire time, gives you a weird look and then makes your bowl for you.

Once it is all paid for by Itto, the gang and you sit down at a table and talk. You don't participate in the conversation that much but you do learn the names of the others in the gang: Akira, Genta, and Mamoru. But you were more focused on the ramen in front of you. It certainly wasn’t the best ramen you’ve had, but it's not the worst. I mean it could use more noodles. It was lacking on that par and- “(Y/n)!”

Snapping out of your food-themed trance you glance back up at the group looking at you like they were waiting for something. “Hm? I’m sorry what were you saying?”

“We were asking if you had any place to stay for the night or were just on the streets?” Mamoru asks.

“Oh, I’m uh, on the streets,” You say putting your head down in shame. You didn’t have a place to go other than that forest area, but that wasn’t the best option.

“How about you stay with me?” Your head snaps up in surprise. You knew Itto was nice in game but you didn’t know he was this nice. “I’ve got one spare bed in my house for ya,”

“But Boss, you only have two beds and one of them is Shinobu’s, she probably won’t like this arrangement.”

“Nocense! Once she sees the noble act I have done for this child she will be proud of me! Plus she’s out for two days so we will have time to come up with a better solution.” He said speed talking the last part.

“I mean as long as I’m not intruding…” you say hesitantly

“Of course not it's my house!” He says a flashes a small at you. “Now come with me, I will show you around!” You said your quick goodbyes to the gang and headed off to Itto’s house.

The first thing you noticed when you got inside was the amount of filth in his house. The sink was filled with dirty dishes, and blankets and pillows were tossed wherever.

“How long ago did your roommate leave?”

“Oh, a day ago,” He says as he grabbed a pillow from the kitchen and dusted it off. He's hopeless without Shinobu, oh my god… There is no way she would have let it get this bad, and within a day he has already managed to wreck the place.

“Anyways, here is where you’ll be sleeping for the time being.” He opened the door to a clean bedroom with a kneeling table in the middle, a futon in the corner, and a dresser on the opposite wall. It was so neat and well put together. You couldn’t even compare it to the natural disaster of a room that was the front room.

“This is so nice…” You walk into the room in awe.

“Yeah, Shinobu is a clean freak, you’ll meet her in 2 days and I’m sure she’ll be happy to meet you and proud of me hehe.” He says with a chuckle. “Oh! And I will get you something to sleep in, I will be right back!” And with that, he dashed off into another room. Leaving you alone. In a room. Of a fictional character's house. Away from home. Away from your family. Friends. Everything you’ve ever cared about and know has gone away from your reach.

Your breathing starts to pick up and the reality of your situation sets in, You are in a dangerous world full of monsters and people who would kill you without a second thought. Why are you here? How is this happening? What do you do when Shinobu comes back to find a stranger in her bed? She’ll probably kick you out and what are you supposed to do then? Your throat tightens up and you feel your self tearing up, you collapse on the floor and hope you disappear. You have no idea what you are doing.

“Woah woah, are you okay.” Itto appears beside you and kneels next to you hesitantly pulling you into his arms. “Hey hey, it’s okay I’m here…” He says trying to comfort you but it doesn’t seem to be helping. “Um, listen I know things are tough right now, and you are a long way from home. But you are strong, and you can make it through this. And don’t worry I can help you every step of the way.”

You look up at him in surprise, “Really?”

“Uh, um… yeah, of course!” He looked like he regretted promising that to you. “Don't worry, for now just get changed and go to sleep. That’s the best thing you can do right now.”

Y-yeah he’s right I just need a bit of sleep to get my mind right.

“Thank you Itto, for everything,” You give him a warm smile and take the yukata from him.

“No problemo sister, anytime!” He says smugly and shoots finger guns at you. “Have a good night and I will see you in the morning.”

The next two days you spent with the Arataki gang were the most fun and the fastest days you’ve had. The first day they took your clothes shopping and ended up getting banned from two shops for improper etiquette. On the second day, they went around challenging children to beetle battles, which caused children to leave crying with less mora than they had originally. This eventually led to Itto getting told off by angry parents. (Let me know if you guys want mini-stories on these events.)

But throughout those two days you still had one thing on your mind. How do you get out of here? Since you knew that sakoku and vision hunt decree were still in act that would mean the traveler hasn’t arrived here yet which is good. Because he could be your ticket out of here. But you had one problem, you had no idea when they would get here. You don’t know if you arrived during their time in Liyue or worse, you guys arrived at the same time. If you arrived at the same time as the traveler, that could be bad for you as it could take a year or two for them to get here. But this fact was out of your control. All you could do was wait a hope they’d come soon.

For now, you were at a restaurant in Inazuma City as the gang said they had something very important they needed to discuss with you. This restaurant was a very middle-class restaurant that would probably have a three-and-a-half review on Yelp, but the price was on the expensive side for Itto and the gang. So they must have had something really important they needed to discuss with you.

You go through dinner with the guys laughing, talking, and enjoying for when Genta nudges the boss and jesters towards you with his head. Itto clears his throat and raises his glass of water while tapping it with a spoon. “Treasured Members of the Arataki Gang, only two days ago have we met this young child all alone in the woods, starving and helpless…”

You quirked your eyebrow up at him, “I wasn’t starving and helples-”

“Starving and helpless!” He pushes a finger in front of your mouth and shushes you. ”And within two days we have nurtured them in a strong individual. This is why I’m pleased to ask, from the gang and myself, if you would like to join the gang of Ara-!” “ARATAKI ITTO!”

A shout vibrates through the restaurant and causes everyone in the restaurant to jump in surprise. The source of the shout was from none other than Kuki Shinobu, the Deputy Officer of the gang.

“Sh-Shinobu! I didn’t know you’d be back so soon!” Itto says with a nervous chuckle.

“I said three days, and I’m back after three days ain’t I?” She says with a dark expression on her face. Her eyes glanced over the table and most of the boys hid their gaze until they landed on you. You don’t know if she is angry at you or what but her eyes never left you. “Itto. Outside. Now.”

“Yes ma’ma.” As they walked away Itto hung his head low in shame. And they walked out of the restaurant and slammed the door behind them. The restaurant hung in an awkward silence until your waiter brought the check out to your table.

“Wait but we're not ready to leave yet,” Genta says to the waitress.

“Um, yes but we are. Please pay your tab and leave, thank you for dining here tonight.” She said nervously while bowing then walked away.

The boys looked at the tab and their faces darkened.

“Shit.”

“Hm? What's wrong?”

“We don’t have the mora for this.”

“Well, how much is it?”

“4,634 mora…”

Shit.

“What were you thinking?! Bringing a kid into the gang, as an official member!?” Kuki Shinobu was currently berating her boss for bringing a kid into the gang without consulting her first. “When Mamoru told me in that letter I couldn’t believe it!”

“But Shinobu you didn’t see how they wer-”

“I didn’t ask for your input, I will allow you to speak when I need you to, yes?”

“Yes…” Itto said dejectedly.

“This has to be the most immature thing you have done in a while and I’ve seen you do some pretty stupid shit. But to bring a child to a gang then allow them to sleep in my room while I was away.” She shook her head at the horned man. “I can’t believe this… Alright, you may defend your case now.”

“Okay, so you see th-,” But before Itto even got a full sentence out Shinobu stopped him.

“Actually, I want to hear this from the kid themself, go get them.” She snapped at him.

Itto let out a sigh, “Fine,” He marched back into the restaurant and grabbed you while the other members frantically figuring out how to pay for this meal. Once you stepped outside and were met with shiobu face to face. She is a short but menacing woman, the mask covering her face made her even more scary.

“My name is Kuki Shinobu, I am the Deputy Officer of the Arataki Gang, you have most likely heard of me through them.” She says gesturing back inside the restaurant. “Now, I'm not mad, I just want to know what's happening. Please tell me your side of the story.” She said giving the floor to you.

“Um, well you see, I was sent on a research mission for the Akademiya here when-…” Kuki listened to your story without interruption and only nodded at you as you explained.

“Hmm, I have a couple of questions. Why don't you go to the Tenryo Commission to take you back?

“I would but it’s still too expensive to go back and I don't have that kind of money right now."

“Hasn’t the akademiya sent a letter to you or anything?”

“In that Strom,” You say pointing to the storm blocking anything from getting in and out of Inazuma. “No.”

“Hm, do you really have nowhere to go?” She says emphasizing 'really'. You shake your head at her. This was the first question you did have to lie to her about. You really didn’t have anywhere to go if Shinobu kicked you out of her house. You didn’t know what you would do… That throat-straining feeling came back to you at that moment.

“Last question, if you were to join the Arataki Gang would not be paid much, and you would have to help around with the gang and keep them out of trouble. But you would be offered a place to stay, eat, and people that have your back. If you are fine with these terms then, would you like to join the Arataki Gang?”

The world stops for a moment, was she offering you a place in the gang? That feeling constricting your heart disappeared and was replaced by an overwhelming joy in your heart. “Y-yes, yes! Absolutely yes!” You rush forward to give her a hug which she hesitantly accepts.

“Hehe, okay let's go back in so we can tell the good news to the boys.” She says smiling with her eyes.

When you walked back into the restaurant you found Itto and the boys hunching over the bill with bags of mora in their hands.

“Come on boys let’s pay the tab and leave.” the masked woman ushers them to hurry.

“We're trying to but, uh, it got a little expensive…”

She quirked her eyebrow up at them. “Hm? Let me see the bill then.” They hesitantly handed her the bill and after one look at it, Shinobu's eyes blew wide open. “4,634 mora…!”

“We’re sorry Shinobu! We swear we will make it up to you but we just need half of that sum for dinner today!”

Shinobu looked like she could kill at any moment right now. “You better or else I’m going to have your heads as dinner the next time!”

You stood behind Shinobu giggling at the fact that a small Japanese woman was lecturing a group of grown men. Maybe you wouldn’t mind if traveler took a little longer to get here…

More Genshin Impact Stories *ੈ✩‧₊˚

True Meaning Table of Content ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡

REMEMBER TO SMASH THAT LIKE BUTTON, OBLITERATE THAT FOLLOW BUTTON AND, REQUEST FOR A SHOUT-OUT IN MY NEXT VIDEO 🗣🗣🗣🔥🔥🔥

[anemonet]

Hi! I'm in this and will be doing coloured schetches!!!

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[fatlazybutterfly]

Ever have that food craving that starts in your bones? It kinda comes on suddenly, and the last coherent thought you have is “Uh oh” before your brain switches to hunting mode.

Every cell in your body is screaming to be stuffed, every limb moving you towards that pile of yumminess.

And then.

The eating is euphoric. You’re hypnotized, consuming with little thought. You can’t think, your brain is too busy swimming in your gooey, dopamine-fueled pleasure stew of feelings.

And then.

Your belly aches, and that pain, ooohhhh, that pain makes you so horny, but also, you’re tired. Your body is done, it’s happy, and it wants to shut down and nap. You try to pleasure yourself, but slowly drift away to sleep.

[ch1re1denn]

uh-HNNNgnnngnnnnnnggghnnnn….barney………… uwah!!!!!!!! hhhhhnggmmmmgggg.. hhhhhhnhhhjhnhjnjnggggggggggg….barney!!!! ooohhhh hmmm mmmnnnnmn….aah!!!!!!!!…..ooh!!!.. hmm.

[danikamariewrites]

Have We Met?

Ruhn x reader

A/n: this just came into my head and I had to get it out bc drunk Ruhn would be a hoot. Not proof read sorry for any mistakes

Warnings: none, drunk Ruhn

Standing at the bar you felt a tap on your shoulder then a mumbled ‘scuse me. Turning to see who was pushing their way between you and the stranger next to you, you spotted Ruhn’s familiar sheet of blue/black hair. He pushed it behind his shoulder, attempting to lean on the bar but his elbow slipped a little.

You laughed at your boyfriends drunk antics. Ruhn was adorable when he was drunk. He turned into baby and became very clingy. He giggled, “You have a cute laugh.” A drunken smile took over his lips. You pinched his cheek which had a small blush thanks to the alcohol he’d been drinking all night. “Thanks baby.”

Ruhn’s eyes went wide at the nick name. He cleared his throat, “So, what’s your name sweets?” You gave him a curious look. “Ruhn you know my name.” “Nuh-uh. I’d remember the prettiest girl in the worlds name if she told me.” He playfully swatted at your shoulder.

Out of the corner of your eye you saw Dec hurrying toward you. “If he’s being weird it’s because Ruhn has forgotten you’re his girlfriend. For the past hour he’s been asking if your single and if he should come talk to you.” Dec turns to Ruhn giving him a disapproving look. “I went to the bathroom for five seconds and told Flynn to watch him. Clearly both are poor listeners.”

You look back at Ruhn and he’s now relying on the bar to hold him up as he gives you a goofy smile. “Ahh I see. Ok you,” you take his drink from his hand and place it down far away from him, “I think it’s time we get you to bed. Good night Dec.” He gives you a friendly wave as you drag Ruhn to the stairs.

“Wait, you’re coming to bed with me?” Ruhn’s words are slurring, telling you he doesn’t even have his eyes open right now. “Yeah Ru. I always go to bed with you.” He giggles again. “Lucky meeee.”

You fling his bedroom door open and swing Ruhn on to the bed. He spreads out taking up the whole bed. Sighing, you realize it’s going to be a struggle to get him ready for bed. But you know how much he hates falling asleep in jeans.

You start pulling his boots off, then his jeans, and you finally move him into a sitting position to take his shirt off. “Hey lil miss,” his eyes slowly and unevenly blink open, “that’s for the third date. I don’t even…I ont eve have your number.”

A laugh slips past your lips but you quickly bite your tongue realizing the frown on his face. “We’re not sleeping together Ruhn. You’re going to bed.” “Ooohhhh ok.” He rips his shirt of discarding it on the messy floor and flips over to his side.

“Goodnight pretty lady.” His words come out muffled as he smushes his face deeper into his pillow. You climb in bed next to him whispering goodnight. You turn the light off and leave a sweet kiss on his head.

[zenmom]

OH LOOK AT MEEEEEEE! I’m the little violet ballon on the righttttt!

💝🐭 Lovely mice 🐭💝

Drawing that I finally finished last February 14th (I need to improve on the backgrounds :')..)

Enjoy it ^^

@sunny1927 @bniebee @zenmom @vickymcsworld Check the ballons :D

[genderlesssinner]

Here we go again

What's Sam got for us tonight

(I forgot they were in VM seating and I was startled by Sam being on the left side of the screen)

I... Hate everything about it, thanks Sam

CRITMAS! Does anyone else miss the fanmail opening streams?

If Tusk Love isn't the absolute trashiest booktok romance garbage I'll be sad

Yeah guys. Make more smut

The Fjordjester wedding! Ugh, I'm sad the live shows are all so far away from me

Alright, episode 114!

Oooh boy okay here we go

I love this map but also holy fuck please don't die guys

OOOH GROG GETTING BIG time to fuck shit uppp

Find the Vax Marble ladies, pls

Uh huh, this group has never done anything out of order nor gotten fucked over for it 🤣

Perc'ahlia really does have a fuck ton of range, don't they

I love Percy. This is why he's the mad tinkerer.

These guys can really do so fucken much it's insane

Yaaasss Nat 20 bbgirl!

We won! 🤣

"I'm guessing because the dnd beyond went down" poor ash

Yeah, no surprise Percy is up first

No Mercy Percy, get em

Oh no he's really mad

Aaand of course Bad News misfires

Alright Vex, kick his ass.

Not yet. Hate that, thanks

A BIGGER VIDULCH? OH HELL NAW

And of course it has a rider, fuck all of that

Scrag is fucking massive no thanks

Thank the fucken gods for disadvantage, ewww. 5 fucken attacks

Ffuuuuucckkk this bitch

I'm just 🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞

Fuck that tower

What do your horse eyes see, Scanlan?

I just notices Liam's shirt guys. It says Crows before bros. I can't with this man.

Oohhhh that's the Sunder King,, oh shit.

Thank fucking god for that disadvantage on everything. That's 2 crits cut off.

Oh nuh uh hate that 'I want to feast too' ugh

Yeah I had a feeling there would be worms. I hate it so much. Looks cool as fuck but no thanks.

"you think we're better than we are, Matt" mood though

"that's what the nuns told me sex is like" LIAM

THIS FUCKING THING JUST ALMOST ATE AN ENLARGED HALF GIANT. FUCK ALL THAT.

fucking nerds. Liam hyping Robbie up 😍😍

(points to that post about how Sam may be Liam's work husband but Robbie is his boyfriend)

Oh fuck no the big one can fly,,, ugh

Oh well. I hate that, legendary action to let his beasties make an attack

Oh no okay well. It just ate Grog. Hate it, but I'm hoping Grogory will do his thing and burst out of it

Oh it's perfect that this fucker fell off the stairs, love it

Oh not Liev'tel, come on

Oh fuck all that disadvantage is gone

"we're not gonna let you die!"

"this time!" LIAM. SIR.

(just saw runtime in live chat, another 5hr ep! Holy shit.)

I love Percy's naming of all of his weapons. So good. Graythorn the swordcanegun

Wonderful time for dnd beyond to shit out on them

Nooo Veeeexxxxx not Trinket!!!

If the bear dies I'm gonna cry yall

Earthquake. Well. This should be good

The damn vidulch is prone, nice

And Liev'tel doing her life steal shit, nice nice nice

Ah shit more fuckers

Oh fuck me that forced nose dive, oouwchie

Son of a bitch Liam. Fucking divine intervention. I'm gonna cry, aren't I.

Okay okay the beacon is exposed. Get up there guys.

Travis is far too excited about being swallowed by this fucken worm.

Get'em Grogory

A fucken crit while in frenzy. Geeettt iiitttt.

Over 100 damage in 3 hits man. Fuck yeah.

"Oh look, it failed." 🤣

I love Grog. I love barbarians, man.

"How little attention do you pay to him as you cut him in half?"

Thank you for abandoning that - never mind. It got worse.

Ooohhhh shit Scanlan getting a peak at the fucking Beacon Vision, cool

The bridge is fucking down guys.

The leylines trying to return to normal. The moon returning to its orbit. Holy shit. Okay.

Break time! Get a drink, snacks, and go to the bathroom! Holy shit yall.

[duchesschameleon]

Hi! Happy Saturday!💜(or whatever day it is for you lol)

How about: “wrapping the other person in the hoodie or jacket they are still wearing, so both of them can stay warm”

With Mike Dodds x reader?

ooohhhh yes yes yes I can. love the mike dodds love!!!

You love fall in New York City, the changing leaves, the crisp air, the return of kids in schoolyards and a more constant crush of people in all parts of the city.

What you don’t love is the way the wind can bite. The chill that seeps into your bones this early in the season as you acclimate to the colder weather again.

Mike feels you shiver next to him as you walk Scout through the park. He looks over, sees you burrow into your sweatshirt, trying to block out the cold.

“Hey, c’mere,” he says, tugging you closer by the hand. “You’re freezing.”

“No I’m not,” you protest, burrowing into his side as he wraps an arm around you.

“Uh huh, sure.”

You walk like that for a moment until Scout finds a place he wants to dig and smell around, explore a little further. Mike hugs you to his chest after he lets Scout off his leash, lets him roam the area a little.

“Jeez! Your nose is freezing!” he exclaims as you turn your face into the small piece of skin exposed by his shirt.

“S’not that cold,” you mumble into his chest, “I’m just not used to it yet.”

“Sure, sweetheart,” Mike placates you as he unzips his jacket, wrapping it around the both of you. He wants to bring you impossible closer; do anything to help you retain some warmth. “C’mon, wrap your arms around me, we gotta keep you warm.”

You let out a contented hum as he wraps his arms around you, keeping the jacket around you as well. It’s not perfect, and you’ll have to face the cold again once Scout is ready to go back home, but for now it keeps you warm and close to the man you love.

send in requests here!

[eddiegettingshot]

ooohhhh that idea is so crazy evil and deranged… like uh oh bobby is actually finally retiring and with hen at the helm they’re down a paramedic!! who’s it going to be!! this is a question that’s haunting buck (BUCKLEY). he experiences a 2x01 redux when he realizes the “new guy” is eddie, thirty-six now and with the most beautiful mustache ever and also a golden glow. plus he’s gay. he even was seeing someone… back in texas… it wasn’t meant to last though. what choice does buck have but to show eddie what WILL last. i mean seriously. marriage is just a piece of paper it can be illegitimate if he wants.

[real-yucous-ghe]

II...oaoammshjhyahnsma...

do you want to though- because your like super pretty and nice and I wouldn't mind either- i mean...complain- I wouldn't complain!!!!-

nnoowoww...guys...ik..ik...but..uranus..uranus pspspsss....come kiss me (he doesnt know it but were soooo dating....trust...)

[imgonzoingrightnow]

BEETLEJUICE GRAVEYARD REVUE AU!!!!! (With art)

Im not very active on here anymore but to those that follow me on Twitter uh you know im #normal about the beetlejuice graveyard revue and I’ve been working on an au for this niche universal show for the past month.

@nothisisntmyname @sadslasher13

Before we start idk if you all know what this show is so in simplest terms the Beetlejuice Graveyard Revue is a theme park show that ran in the Universal parks from 1991-2016 (in the US). In the show, Beetlejuice puts on a rock and roll show featuring the Universal Monsters HOWEVER, given that they are monsters and not hip cool rock and rollers, BJ transfunkafies the monsters into rockstars for the show (with the audiences help)

The monsters included in the show originally are:

• Dracula

• Frankenstein’s monster

• The Bride of Frankenstein

• The Wolfman

• The Phantom of the Opera

Further down the line Erik was removed and replaced with Hip and Hop, and later, Cleopatra and Phantasia. However, in this AU it’s just gonna be this set of monsters (with some appearances by Hip and Hop)

below are some links with videos about it teehee:

ANYWAY. THE AU. what if beetlejuice turns the universal monsters into rockstars, as per usual, but he can’t turn them back to normal afterwards. So BJ being BJ is like KACHING so he becomes their manager/ring leader and they become like an official touring band.

All the monsters retain their memories and characteristics in this change, but they get new skills and slight changes in personality in order to fit this star power vibe. They’re like chemically engineered rockstars.

Drac is like the gay emo cousin and that’s the best way I can describe it he’s always hungry always trying to bite someone you tell him to stop and he’s like “oooHHHH MY gOoOOdAAH”. Hip and Hop are like their groupies!

One time they forgot Dracula at like a pitstop and he did hard drugs, got 7 tattoos he couldn’t pay for, killed 4 people and injured 12, he also fucked some bitches and sucked a ton of blood. they picked him up later that day

Frankie is very nice and not very bright and Drac and BJ especially like messing with him. The bride is the defacto leader if Beetlejuice isn’t there. Bride is the most levelheaded one that’s why she’s the leader and they all listen to her cause a. She’s hot b. Yeah she seems to know what she’s talking about c. Feminism!

Bride and Frank are both not very bright but Bride is really confident and logical so she can figure things out quicker but she and Frankie still do little homeschool lessons sometimes. I think it’d be lessons from BJ but they’re all horribly distorted so Erik has to come and be like no no stop omfg. BEETLEJUICE. YOURE GONNA GIVE THEM STDS… LOWER YOUR HAND FRANKIE. They’re also few and far between cahse BJ doesn’t care and forgets also. If they’re bickering (Phantom and BJ) Bride and Frankie read up on their own (if they care) and help each other.

Wolfie is not allowed alone because if you leave him alone for too long he will destroy the furniture. He’s usually with Beetlejuice, if not he’s with the #gang if not he’s with hip and hop but he’s not allowed alone

Beetlejuice and the phantom are basically the ones in control most of the time (they are married) (they aren’t) (they might as well be) this is where the feminism comes in although phantom would be second in command if beetlejuice wasn’t there. hes a sort of a cryptic fellow (he’s also very dramatic) anyway he’ll just do his own thing UNLESS someone touches him the wrong way then he’s like the dramatic ass we know and love and he’ll be just immature as the rest of them. My boys also been trying to not be as much of a dick to women and he also likes bride cause who doesn’t. so he likes that she’s the one taking the lead if not him.

Also on phantom being the only one with a license it’s really funny cause his song has that car thing going on. frank shouldn’t be anywhere near a wheel, bride does not know or care to drive she’s literally one week old, drac would purposely throw them off a cliff, Wolfie would drive like he’s playing gta and BJ is a lazy fuck. At one point Erik quits and begins working at Kmart and then right after Kmart goes bankrupt.

THAT CONCLUDES THE AU PORTION here are some incorrect quotes for your consideration:

[dr-james-wilson-oncologist]

uh-HNNNgnnngnnnnnnggghnnnn.….my widdle toesies...I…uwah!!!!!!!! hhhhhnggmmmmgggg.. hhhhhhnhhhjhnhinjnggggggggggg.…..my WIDDLE toesies!!!! ooohhhh hmmm mmmnnnnmn……..aah!!!!!!!!.....ooh!!!

if i had to read this horror, so do you

I’m going back to bed. And hopefully not waking up.

[abyssmal-skies]

Ms ebg lore was HEAVY so uh to keep it short: Diluc tried to treat me well but failed ( + awkwardly since we were exes there HAHA BYE )

I am curious what your oldest selfship is ! :3❤️

Ooohhhh the lore goes hard icic

Well, the oldest one that i actually knew was a selfship was... Ayaka, but in the beginning, i was like imagining being with diluc

[yourplayersaidwhat]

My party has been exploring a BloodHunter's Lodge that had been thought a ruin but, in fact, is currently under the control of one of (many) groups who would happily see us dead. Our ranger, a halfling named Wren, had been aged and possessed by the ghost of a powerful necromancer our friendly (undead) Bloodhunter, Marigold, killed before they passed away prior, so the ghost has quite the grudge against Marigold. Apparently, Marigold has some... feelings.. about the ghost and maybe Wren...

DM: Wren, I'm gonna let you try to make a will save on your next turn, see if you can get out from the ghost's possession. Marigold, you're up.

Marigold: Right. Everything is going to be non lethal, but let's do Crimson rite, and try attacking with both my swords.

*rolls*

Marigold: .... that's a nat 20. I'm going to use my inspiration to do max damage!

Zoe(Rogue) *while laughing*: Marigold is beating old lady Wren!

Marigold *laughing as well*: The power of Christ compels you!!

DM: You're using your fire sword right? As well as your enchanted silver? That does extra damage to undead?

Everyone: ooohhhh....

Marigold: ... yeah...

DM: That damage counts too. >:D

Wren: I'm sensing some underlying aggression here!

Marigold: I sorry!!! Uh.. x damage.. Marigold is literally beating Wren with their swords, setting her on fire and shouting "The power of Christ compels you!" *wham wham wham!!*

Wren: .... well.. I'm below 0 hp. This is elder abuse.

DM: Well... never mind Wren trying to will save. That's no longer needed.

Everyone cackling and various cries of elder abuse, while the rest of us deal with the ghost.

Marigold later: Oh! I was using d4s! I should have been using d6s for damage!

Wren: It's nice to know I would have been even more knocked out then I already was!

Marigold: I was holding back! Clearly I was holding back!

Wren: Oh yes, while setting me on fire and giving an old lady a concussion. Marigold and Wren are going to have a very long, serious talk about this later. Air out the clear tension that has suddenly come to light.

Marigold: I sorry!!! >-<;;;