thelampisaflashlight

[thelampisaflashlight]

If you're at all wondering how Day 9 went, I was handed a 1lb. bag of worms and was standing there holding it and saw the faintest twitch of movement and started laughing in a very head in hands kind of way.

My boss was like, "Are you okay??" and I had to explain that this was just one of those, "Well, this might as well happen." kind of things.

Anyway, onwards to Day 10.

[thelampisaflashlight]

Cirrus, after a long lecture about tour bus etiquette: "And where do you go if you're being a dick?!" Everyone Else: "UPSTAIRS TO THE TIMEOUT CORNER!" Aeon, with confidence, somehow louder than everyone else: "INSIDE DEW!" Cirrus: "Wrong answer! Upstairs you go!" Dew, shrugging, holding up his hand: "I mean, technically, he's not totally wrong..." Cirrus, pointing: "You, too, get in the corner." Aurora, placing a hand on her shoulder: "Cir, if they're both in the timeout corner..." Cirrus, pauses, thinking, realizing: "OPPOSITE CORNERS! OPPOSITE CORNERS OF THE BUS-"

[thelampisaflashlight]

Me: "This cut on my arm should get covered, because if I leave it uncovered it could get dirt in it, or I'll scratch an itch and pull it open again."

Also me, itching the bandage: "Ah, right, adhesive allergy-"

[thelampisaflashlight]

I feel like I need to run through the woods, blindly, at top speed until the trees blur and I inevitably tumble into the underbrush and slam into wet leaves and densely packed earth.

I need to bite something.

You know, typical Tuesday morning.

...I have three more days at work after this, and I am, like, on the verge of returning to the wild.

If Day 8 was the day of weird music choices, Day 9 is the day I go feral.

I'm realizing I may just be hungry.

Possibly.

I have no idea.

[thelampisaflashlight]

Day 8 of my 12 day run at work morning music choices are a touch questionable.

Obviously there's a lot of Ghost, but I keep listening to Ain't No Love In Oklahoma by Luke Combs from the Twisters soundtrack.

Like, "Oh, Umbra, Missilia Amori... Ain't No Love In Oklahoma... Take Me Home Tonight by Eddie Money for some reason-"

[thelampisaflashlight]

Dew, unglamoured, in a regular, human hospital: "Let's pretend for a second that whatever I have going on here is completely normal, and not worry too much about the finer details-" The doctor who works next to a convention hall, who has seen too much: "Do you have any known allergies to any mainstream pain relievers?" Aeon, who thought this was the end of it all: "Oh thank fuck..." Dew, just as surprised: "Not that I know of... You're really not going to ask any questions about all of this?" Doctor: "Unless it's relevant to how you got injured, no." Aeon and Dew, high fiving: "SICK!" Doctor: "You may have to explain that though." -points at Papa V waiting in the wings- "Is that the Babadook??" Papa V: -waves cheerily- Dew: "...Now, see-"

[thelampisaflashlight]

Aether, staring out into space with a serious expression: "You see, there's this moment when the tension kind of goes out of his body, and all his sharper edges soften and that's usually when I pounce, because he's not ready for it at all, and he's so indignant about it, it's so fucking hot..." -nodding to himself- "And he makes this face when he cums that's-" The sibling of sin getting their arm put in a cast: "...Is this supposed to burn?" Aether, blinking: "Oh shit!"

[thelampisaflashlight]

Aether, playing a party game with the other ghouls, has a notecard taped to his forehead: "Am I something you can eat?" Rain, looking at the card: "...In a way." Aether, furrowing his brow, confused: "Okay... Well, let's see, I'm something that's small, something that's alive, and something you can kind of eat..." -shakes his head- "I have no idea!" Dew, walking by on his way to get a glass of water from the kitchen, looks at Aether: "Why do you have my name written on your forehead??" Aether: "Oh! Oh. Ohhh..." -puts a hand over his mouth- "Rain, I have definitely eaten Dew, you should have just said yes-" Dew, flustered: "AETHER!" Cirrus, leaning over to Rain, whispering: "I've eaten Dew, too, so, like, Aeth's right, you should've just said yes." Rain, whispering: "I thought that would make it too easy."

[thelampisaflashlight]

Dew, reading a book he picked up at the rest stop aloud to the other ghouls as a bedtime story: "His throbbing manhood stood proud like an ivory tower, adorned at its apex by a ruby jewel for a head-" -bites his lip and hisses through his teeth- "I feel like something is seriously wrong with this man's penis." Rain, looking over his shoulder: "His cock angulated inside of me... the fuck it did. Doesn't that mean it bent? Her pussy bent his dick." Cirrus, holding up the same book: "If you're not going to keep reading, Dew, at least say 'popcorn' and pick someone-"

[thelampisaflashlight]

Why pay a subscription fee to a dating app when I can circumnavigate the whole relationship thing and simply text the one man I know who likes fishing and get the fish pics for free?

[thelampisaflashlight]

Can we also talk about how I feel bad for both calling the company to ask for the eta, and then calling our sales rep to explain the situation, because, like, that is quite literally their jobs? I'm supposed to call them when there's an issue and/or they're supposed to call or email me to give me etas or notices on delays??

Like, wtf, I cannot win with this stuff.

Guess who got stuck at work for an hour and a half after closing because our vendor fucked up and set our delivery time for an hour after we closed and it was still late?

Yeah.

Yeahhh...

Day two of this twelve straight day run is already shaping up to break me.

But we stay silly.

[thelampisaflashlight]

Guess who got stuck at work for an hour and a half after closing because our vendor fucked up and set our delivery time for an hour after we closed and it was still late?

Yeah.

Yeahhh...

Day two of this twelve straight day run is already shaping up to break me.

But we stay silly.

[thelampisaflashlight]

Seen a burning trash truck on my way home from work, the drivers were okay, but someone definitely threw out something they shouldn't have, because the whole back of the truck they were emptying out was straight up ash.

This is why they say not to throw out certain electronics with the batteries inside, because it can cause them to pop and start a fire inside the chamber, which can burn for a prolonged period of time unnoticed.

Seriousness aside, I looked at that after I passed by and went, "I don't know what this omen means, but noted."

[thelampisaflashlight]

Me: "I don't often impulsively purchase things, but when I do, it's because... I dunno why." -holding up a semi-cursed looking plush of a mage- "He is friend shaped and his name is Soap."

[thelampisaflashlight]

I'm considering having another go at ghoul roulette, that thing where I rolled stats for the ghouls and had them fight each other for the hell of it.

[thelampisaflashlight]

Rain: "I've discovered if you don't say much and act shy, people will just leave you alone, and that works out wonderfully for me, because then no one expects me to be the one getting up to any mischief." -holding the pin to a door hinge in one hand and a screw driver in another- "I was going to set Dew up for this one, but he's laid up with an injury at the moment, so Cirrus it is!"

[thelampisaflashlight]

I've started joking whenever the door opens at work from the wind, that it's "just the ghost", and, man, I'm wondering how many supposedly haunted locations were the result of someone doing exactly that.

Like, given the right set of circumstances, if someone overheard me saying that, and didn't know that there's a draft in the shop that swings the door open sometimes, then they might think to themselves, "Oh, it IS haunted then!"

Add to that the shop is a roughly 200+ year old building (I was corrected on the age of the building recently by my coworker, who informed me it was older than initially believed) and you have enough layers to make that haunted stew.

But you might be saying to yourself, "Yeah, but, Lamp, you know it isn't haunted, and often tell people as much!"

And while this may be true... given how long I am at the shop, perhaps, I would like to create a bit of chaos.

Anyway, barn's not haunted.

Just a touch drafty.