#ughhh i hate everything
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uhhh sketchdumps AGAIN bcs i had to get them out of my system after this busy ass week
also hiii new mkulia redesigns dropped ^_^!!
#my art#total drama#tdi 2023#td mk#total drama mk#tdi mk#td julia#total drama julia#tdi julia#mkulia#td mkulia#total drama mkulia#i rlly wanna draw all the tdi cast as dramaeama but#i also need to do like a thousand rhings n im soo overwhelmeed!!! iii#m gnna finish intertwined chapt 4 this weekend ;;;;; i think im like 6k words in now??#ughhh i hate everything#BUT hopefully u guys like this new style cause i sure do!!^_^
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The first time I've travelled states since 2019, the first time Ive seen friends since longer than that. Ive held off from even going on trips all during the pandemic because I was so scared I would bring Covid home and infect immune compromised kids. And I finally work the nerve up to do it. And I get hit with Covid because someone in our party was already infected when I got there. Now I'm somewhere between days two and five and this shit sucks.
#Fucking Covid man#I was sooo stressed trying to be careful in the airport too#Ughhh I hate everything
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talking about my finger im hella mad bc i have classes today and tomorrow that i have to type using a mechanical keyboard but now i CANT
#ughhh i hate everything#why would this happen to me#i have two hurt fingers and an upcoming headache#i also have to sleep but if i sleep now i know i wont get up to school#yesterday i went to school on a monday for the first time and now i plan on going to school the whole week for the first time#i had such a bad day#im feeling sick#ekon speaks
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i thought the reason was obvious..??
but you dont seem to get the implication so i guess ill just keep talking and you can listen if you want to
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that one meme but its them :] sort of a sequel to this
#chilaios#uughhhh ughhh GUYS WHO CANT COMMUNICATE BECAUSE THE WAY THEY SHOW AFFECTION IS CONVOLUTED AND WEIRD!!!#HEEELPPP HEEEEEELP#you see. i WOULD make another meta post about them other than the one unfinished one i have. but this is the ONLY WAY i can describe it#without like. tripping over my words or being incomprehensible#UUGOHOHOHGHUUGH IMPLICATIOOONS IMPLICATIOOONSSSSSS#'mimics are cute when theyre turned over!' (i want to show how this creature you hate can be charming in its own right)#+ the implication within the story that chilchuck lets laios call him chil#+ chilchucks odd amount off knowledge on monsters#+ IDK. EVERYTHING.#ITS ALMOST 12 AM MY THOUGHTS ARENT COHERENT. I TOLD YOU THIS MEME IS THE ONLY WAY I COULD EXPRESS IT WITHOUT SOUNDING NONSENSICAL
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guy who's been everywhere and knows everyone
#sonic the hedgehog#sonic#sth#god i needed to draw something different im stuck and i hate everything i draw#i dont have the the theee energy or whatever i cant get myself to work on my art and it sucks#and idk what to do about it#ughhh#im just making ugly doodles that i hate and i feel even worse please sonic help meee save meeee#art#fanart#digital art
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they're filming the next life series like right now. like Right Now. they're making alliances that are gonna change our brain chemistry entirely!!!!! they're doing things that are going to make us go INSANE!!!! they're talking right now. they're interacting. they're playing the game. maybe someone's died already. maybe there's a full-fledged server war going on. we don't know. we won't know until friday and that is KILLING me
#like. interactions between groups we havent even THOUGHT of#like mounders or gem and the scotts. those were so out of left field but they collectively absolutely changed EVERYTHING#this time next week we're going to be like wtf how did we survive without *insert team name here*#boat boys interactions. will they team up? will they hate each other? we won't know and UGHHH i hate it and i love it#is scar gonna say some out of pocket shit again like “you and me we know monopolies”#because that was REALLY uncalled for. nine dead thousands injured#is etho gonna be just as pathetic wet cat washed up as he was in secret life. probably but we dont KNOWWWW#and then the big question the elephant in the room IS JOEL GONNA WIN#he is. i believe in him#babe u can DOOO ITTTT#been cheering on u for forever plsssplspsplspls#nya talks#trafficblr#life smp#life series#life series smp#traffic smp#traffic series
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started stardew valley for the first time. born to remember villager likes and dislikes forced to immediately forget it the moment i take my eyes off thw wiki
#HELP. HEEEELPP <- THE FORGETTER#i have 18 different tabs open and im pretty sure half of them are duplicates. i have not made anything past 5000G i am so cooked#rn im at summer 11 ish?? i cant remember dates in real life either jesus christ GRIPPING THE COMMUNITY CALENDAR WITH MY BARE HANDS#my ass really went into this like “ill just take it easy and go into it blind so i get the newborn baby deer experience" completely ignoran#to the fact that i get anxious disappointing ppl and not having any background knowledge going into smth new. like a FOOL#also the walking speed is just slow enough to make me space out and forget where i was going and what i needed to do head in my hands#ive had to backtrack all over pelican town so many different times im in fucking adhd hell. resource management hell#im saying this like i hate it but its actually pretty fun and engaging when im not gripping my head trying to remember what i was doing#i got linus' 2 heart event and it made me whimper a little. LINUSSS LINUS I LIKE HIM. AND WILLY AND MARNIE THEYRE SO NICEYS#marnie kinda like.. reminds me of my friends mom even her face is pretty similar. shes sweet i like her. also willy calls me lad hes cool#i think im just gonna start a new save and NOT rely on the fucking mixed seed forages bc my ass was too stubborn to buy seeds#i just got sebastians 2 heart event too ughhh ive never had to work so hard for an emo boys approval. but it was satisfying#corn will fix me. its a replenishable summer-fall crop corn has to fucking fix me PLEASE#i also. made a stardew valley farmer. the one im playing as. their name is cosmo they have a backstory and everything im making#him a ref. his backstory is so fucking funny just wait#yapping#diary#puppy plays sdv
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when ur so bored you have no choice but to become the monster
“You’re going to call off that storm.”
Ughhh I’m so boreddddd
Kinda random but am I officially a digital artist now?? PLZ LET ME JOEN THE DARK SIDE IVE BEEN TRAINIGN FOR SO LING—
#odysseus fanart#ody#odysseus#epic the musical odysseus#epic the musical#epic the vengeance saga#600 strike#ixl#ughhh help me I hate ixl so much#Why did I decide to draw on ixl#There are so many better places to go#Ngl tho ixl colors are pretty nice#It’s kinda weird that the blue highlighter slowly turns grey but whatever ig#Still tho:#HOW DID EVERYTHING TURN AGAINST US#HOW DID SUFFERING BECOME SO ENDLEESSSSS#that’s how I’m feeling rn
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everyone talks themselves into a life that suits them best
#i'm sorry the vision is nonexistent but i see it. his wordinggggg is so lila...#l'amica geniale#s4 spoilers#my brilliant friend spoilers#l'amica geniale spoilers#lila cerullo 🫀#franco mari#elena greco 📝#also elena leaning in to listen to him with so much affection. she's hearing lila i am 100% sure of it#she is instinctively responsive to anything lila-like#i hate how the screencap can't capture it. she shifts all of her weight on her arm and leans forward#like she wants to swim in that conversation#i love how... words are losing their meaning links to lila re: the solara article... she arrives to the same conclusion...#but elena refutes their statement. she writes about them. ughhh#also ADORE how visceral franco's description is. literally lila during the earthquake and just lila in general#she's alwasy using bodily fluids as metaphors... infection as a synonym to dissolving boundaries.#like... i can't even#i actually have a more elaborate lilafranco web weave in my drafts that discusses everything i mention in these tags but#i can't really post that yet#ferranteposting
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wanted to draw some halloween art but apparently the shit day i had is affecting me more than i wanted to allow (even tho i took a long nap) ...........i dont like anything i draw rn. maybe ill try later. happy halloween and dont upset the spirits or they will haunt you ❤️
#ill go and have a strong enough drink to delete the day fr now and then try again later ughhh#yknow people and work pressure and no break angered and overstimmed me sm im ditching the wine and going straight for the vodka#bc im not allowed to bite people who test my patience and piss me off#ahhhh i should not even remember im getting a migraine again fr#im in such a “i hate everything” mood rn no wonder i dont like my art now AHHHHHHH I WAS SO EXCITED TO DRAW DAMMIT#😭😭😭😭😭#babbles#tbd
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Carried by the crowd! Danke, Groningen! 💗
#rammstien#paul landers#richard kruspe#christoph schneider#oliver riedel#flake lorenz#till lindemann#ughhh#i love it#but#i hate it that everything is so damn fast#paul at the 1st one 🥹💖💖💖#richard it the car 🥹💖💖💖#stadium tour 23#my ramm gifs
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repeatedly tugs at the sleeves of his sweater
urghhhh…….anyone got any scissors? i wanna shove em in my ears
#ughhh!!! RAHHHHH!!!!!#everything is so!!!! errrrgggh!!!!!#I HATE IT HERE!!!!#(overstimulated asf rn)
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I'm very tired, and also we got pizza yesterday which was a giant mistake. I ate half of it yesterday and half today. so so much pain. why did I choose to have garlic oil on it?! it probably would've been bad already without that. but no, I just had to make it even worse.
#I'm not sure what the pain even is#maybe heartburn? I still don't understand what that really feels like so could be. but I don't know#it's probably because I don't have a gallbladder anymore and I know I need to watch how much fat I eat and everything... but ughhh it has#not been this bad even once since I had it removed#so this was unexpected#ouch. it was really bad last night. it took me so long to fall asleep 🙃#I also started taking a magnesium supplement a few days ago bc it was recommended to me.#so yeah my body hates me even more now and everything is bad :)#I'm just gonna go to bed and play stardew valley until I hopefully fall asleep.#personal#the pizza was delicious btw. I do regret eating it but... clearly not enough to not finish the second half 😬
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i dont like my highschool friends
#r is the only good one#R IF U SEE THIS I <3 U /P#h is just. ugh.#hes older than me but hes like a motherfuckong toddler I HAVE TO TEACH HIM HOW TO SPELL#HOW TO DO EVERYTHING#UGHHH#AND HE KNOWS IM ARO BUT HE WONT FUCKING STOP TRYING TO FLIRT WITH ME#AND SO DOES V LIKE HE KNOWS BUT HE HELPS H DO IT UGHHHH#I FUCKING HATE THISSSS#3/4 OF MY TIME IS SCHOOL AND THAT TIME IS DEDICATED TO HELPING THESE DUMBASSES BECAUSE IM THE SMART KID OR SOME SHIT#WTF DO YOU MEAN U CANT SPELL COUNTRY YOU'RE 14
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i have a headache
#i've been stuck scrolling instagram for the past few days#i don't even like being on there#modern ig is so overstimulating everything is either a reel or a reel in disguise or an image post that inexplicably has audio#i kept making myself go on there because i wanted to find a way to make art friends or a community or w/e#and i thought if i had more of a presence and interacted more i'd eventually get people to like. talk to me and comment stuff ig. idk#but ughhhh#i don't think insta is a good platform for that cause it's either pictures with a short caption or the worst media format known to man#like. idk i wanted to find and follow and be friends with and be Cool Artists (don't ask me to define that)#but no artist on instagram is a Cool Artist because there's no goddamn text on there#like if it makes sense i wanna find people who talk About art as well#but not in an art Discourse way#which is another thing. even if instagram had more Talking it would still be shit because the mainstream 'art community' is insufferable#art tiktok is that on steroids#and instagram is is bootleg tiktok#the same five discourse topics jokes memes advice whatever the only difference is now they're circlejerking about ai too#i wanna be Casual and Spontaenous and Mysterious and shit but IG's layout makes me feel like i can't just post whatever#i feel this pressure to give my posts all the same format and add tags and do this and do that and have good Branding or w/e#and it's just ughhh why can't I be a famous enigma (<- doesn't make or share anything)#even on tumblr the pressure is the same#and at the same time i hate looking back on my art accounts (both ig and here) because it just. doesn't align with what i wanna do#like my attempts at categorising and tagging and being consistent#it's just so. yuck#i want to have a Good Brand but i also want to be 'real' but then i look back at my disjointed messy past work and i cringe#i think i need to block my irls from my art accounts bc i feel super embarassed trying to do any typical Get Noticed on Social Media thing#cause it feels embarassing being seen doing shit that's ''influencer-y'' (idk what to call it)#cause it feels out of character to how i actually am in real life#but also why i do want to show my ''real'' character? I'm not cool#and that's another thing I've had these accounts for ages#looking at my past posts makes me fuckign cringe#I want to purge them or start over
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Not even a week into school and I already have an entire 7 page script to read for a debate, an entire project, two essays, 3 Tests tomorrow and a quiz the day after… (this isn’t even including daily homework)
WHY DOES LIFE HATE ME
#Duck update#Yayyy#i regret everything#Ughhh i hate school#But hey we get to make pancakes in chemistry sometimes this week#Guess it evens out (it doesn’t)#I’m already burnt out and it hasn’t even been a week yet#What is this#Oh well#i said I wouldn’t have a panic attack this year and I plan to stick to it#I… probably will break that promise#life just hates me lol#stress stress stress#it’s alr#i get to write for you guys soon enough#my precious therapy :3#love you guys ❤️
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