#ugh tomorrow starts an intensive 5 day at work

[chikinan]

I think I forgot how to have fun again so im gonna go check my infinite draft folder and write a little I think :)

[blackwolfstabs]

30 Day Writing Challenge: Day 8

COOKING

Mindy, Chad, and Tara make desserts for Thanksgiving.

“Alright, losers!” Mindy’s dictating voice echoed throughout the apartment from the kitchen. “Thanksgiving’s tomorrow, and Mom’s gonna be here tonight, which means all desserts have to be done before 5:00!”

From the sofa, Chad’s reply came, “Who died and made you the boss?” He didn’t look away from the television screen, caught up in an intense game on the Xbox. Beside him, Tara twisted her face over to where Mindy stood.

“Sam’s down for the count, because she’s still getting over Strep, so that leaves me as the next oldest,” she answered.

“No, it doesn’t. Danny’s older than Sam,” her brother retorted, but Tara cut in.

“But he’s been taking care of her, so he shouldn't be making any of the food.” She then reverted to the older twin, “What are we making?”

“Two things.” Mindy pulled two sheets of paper from the countertop and divided them. “We’ve got banana pudding and pumpkin pie, because Chad’s lactose intolerant.” She glanced over as Tara left the couch to meet her. “I’m thinking 2 people can work on the pudding, while someone else does the pie,” she suggested, then looked past the younger to call her sibling out. “That means get off the Xbox and come help!”

Chad sighed and reluctantly turned off the console. “Is Sam even gonna be able to join us tomorrow?” he asked upon joining them in the kitchen.

It had been 5 days since Sam had woken up in the middle of the night with a fever of 102.6°F and a terribly inflamed throat. Luckily, Tara had still been awake when she had come out of her room, where she checked in on her sister to find her feverish and barely able to talk. Since then, she had been battling fever, body aches, and blistering throat pain on and off, and because Tara was still having classes until the Tuesday before Thanksgiving, Danny had offered to let Sam stay with him until she was no longer contagious to avoid her risking catching it.

“Yeah,” Tara replied, “She’s been fever-free for 24 hours, plus Danny said her throat pain is pretty much gone. It’s just her voice that’s still shot and she’s tired. But otherwise, she’s okay.”

Beyond the young couple, Mindy interjected, “But we’ll keep her out until tomorrow to be safe.” A dual nod from the other two had her moving on, “Okay, I’m gonna do the pie, so you two get to work on the pudding. Yeah?” 

“Yup,” Tara agreed, while her brother shrugged.

“Sure.”

“Alright! Core Fuckin’ Four, Operation Dessert is a go!”

“It’s not Core Four without Sam!” Chad barked.

However, Tara just waved it off. “She’s here in spirit.” She moved over to the cabinet to grab a large bowl for the pudding mixture. “Besides, even if she was here, she’d probably end up doing it all herself because she’s a control freak.” 

Chad thought in silence for a moment, then snapped his fingers. “Triple Threat!”

“What?” his girlfriend tilted her head.

His sister shook her head, “Would you give the nicknames a rest?!” She leaned against the counter to set the oven to 425°F.

“Well, we gotta have something, since we can’t be the Core Four right now.”

“Ugh, whatever… Just get going, okay?”

“Yes, ma’am!” Both Chad and Tara jinxed, which stirred up another topic. “Jinx!”

“You owe me,” Tara caught him first, turning back to the bowl she retrieved.

But he had a different opinion. “No, I don’t think so!”

“Yes, you do. Your whole life savings,” she specified.

Now, Mindy jumped in. “Oh, that’s nothing. He’s got, like, two pennies. Maybe.” Her and her twin exchanged a truthful glance, while she undid the wrapping on the pre-made pie crust.

“And that’s a big maybe,” he added.

But Tara just shrugged, not persuaded in the slightest, “Well, you better figure it out, because I’ll be waiting on compensation.” She drug the recipe into her view and read over it. “In the meantime, you can start cutting bananas.” She didn’t look up as she tossed her hand over to where the hand of bananas sat.

“Yeah, make yourself useful.” Mindy pulled out a knife and held it out to him, which he took.

As he passed behind the youngest, Chad didn’t fail to throw a playful jab. “You’re a little low on the vertical spectrum to be giving orders, shorty.” He felt her glare over at him, which made him return a smirk.

“You wanna add more onto your debt?” she challenged.

“Are you gonna give me the Black Friday deal?”

“Absolutely not.”

“Then, no thank you.”

“Well, alright then.” As serious as she may have sounded, an amused smile scarred Carpenter’s face as she turned to retrieve ingredients from the fridge.

By the stove, Mindy stepped aside so Chad could get a cutting board. “You know, I cannot look at bananas the same, since we did that one lab in Biology…” She pulled a plastic bowl for herself. “Like, I wouldn’t say it’s weird, but knowing that it has DNA definitely makes it strange to eat now.”

Tara kicked the refrigerator door shut, for she was carrying the milk and small container of Cool Whip. “For real though. But at least for this, they’re mainly drowned in pudding. Plus, there’s Nilla Wafers, which slap hard,” she replied. 

The other broke her concentration with a small jump, “Oh, you think normal Nilla Wafers slap? Girl, hold it.” She went to the grocery bags sitting on the dining room table and pulled out 2 boxes of the same brand. “Not only did I get the regular kind…” She came back in to emphatically drop the boxes next to Tara’s workspace. “I got the minis! My thought was to—”

“Put them on top?” Tara finished her sentence. “Yep!”

“Okay, Nilla Minis coming in hot,” she nodded in approval, “I like it.”

“Wait a minute!” Across the kitchen, Chad looked over his shoulder, catching both of their attention. “We should sign our names in the mini wafers!”

Tara picked up the box and shook it a little, “I don’t think we’ll have enough.”

“But we could do our initials,” he suggested, then changed the idea. “Oh, we could do T.T. for Triple Threat!”

Mindy shook her head, “No, we’re not doing that.” Meanwhile, Tara shut her eyes and looked away, looking like she was holding back laughter.

“Why not?”

Then, she spoke. “Because it doesn’t sound like initials!” She giggled, “Say it slowly, and you’ll know what I mean.”

The football player paused in his slicing to think about it. Then, it clicked. “Oh, God, you’re right.”

“Yeah? Got it now?”

“Yeah, I got it.”

“Mom would kill us, if she saw that we basically put ‘titty’ on a dessert,” his sister put her hands up in an indirect ‘I’m not even gonna bother taking a risk’. While the other two exchanged laughs, she pressed on, moving back to her cooking station. “I mean, if Tara’s are your preferred dessert, that’s your business. But I don’t need it advertised on the table.” At this scandalous remark, Tara exclaimed in surprise, which made her finish with, “You can tell her you're thankful for her rack, when you two are alone.”

“Mindy!” Carpenter’s face went red in embarrassment.

“Mindy, that is so inappropriate, dude…” Chad sided with her.

But she just shook her head and shrugged innocently, “Hey, you set yourself up for that one.” From there, the three trailed off the conversation, Mindy and Tara focusing on mixing up the majority of their ingredients while Chad sliced all the bananas and disposed of the peels and bruised parts. 

“Chad, baby, be a dear and put the milk up,” Tara didn’t look up from checking the steps to the recipe again. She held out the carton to him.

Like the gentleman he was, he obeyed in undead chivalry and tossed the empty Cool Whip container into the trash in one trip. “You want me to start making the bottom layer, babe?” he quizzed. “All the bananas are sliced.”

“Yeah, that’d be good.” She retrieved the 9” x 13” tin pan from the edge of the counter and placed it on the other side of her, where he could get to it. “Just do the regular cookies and put a banana on top,” she told him, “Once I finish stirring this, I gotta let it sit for a few minutes and then we can layer.” Handling the whisk that was covered in the sweet mixture, she went to work, not missing the chance to lick the part that had dripped onto her finger.

Chase snaked up beside her with the full cutting board. “I saw that,” he teased, which made her look over at him.

“Mmm,” she flipped her wrist to catch another misplaced smudge. “You jealous?” There was a gleam in her eyes that teased him right back, her signature smirk plain on her face.

“Nope.” He slid his arm around her shoulder to pull her close enough for him to steal a kiss, sneaking his tongue on her bottom lip, where he noticed some of the pudding remained. Once he pulled away, he licked his lips. “Mmm, because you missed a spot,” he chuckled.

Her eyes narrowed to stare him down for a brief second. Then, she grabbed the box of wafers and shoved it into him playfully, “Here. Get to work.” While he obeyed her command, she checked-in over her shoulder. “How’s it looking, Mindy?”

“So far, so good,” the owner of the name answered. “Just need a can opener…” she muttered to herself, then raised her voice again, “Tara, do you and Sam have a can opener?”

Tara glanced in her direction, “Yeah, I thought so. Check the farthest drawer on your left.” When there wasn’t one in there, she paused her mixing and searched a few more drawers. “Uh… Let me call Sam real quick and see if she knows where it is,” she offered and immediately left to do so.

Her phone was charging in her bedroom, so that’s where she dialed. Luckily, there was a quick pick-up on the other line.

“Hello?”

The younger sister was taken aback for a split second at how hoarse Sam sounded, the first part of the greeting barely holding any strength. It was more like a wheeze. “Sorry to make you talk, Sam, but do you know where the can opener is?”

“No, it’s fine. We threw it out, remember? The knob that you turn the can with kept jamming.” She was nearly cut off by a quick bout of coughing that made her pull away from the speaker.

“Shit…” Tara hissed, “Does Danny have one? Do you know?”

“I’ll ask, hold on.” 

There was a shuffling noise, before a rough throat-clear came from the recipient. 

“Danny!”

God, she sounded like all of her vocal cords had been snipped with scissors. Her throat wasn’t in terrible pain anymore, but it sure did sound like it. Danny must’ve heard her though, because she went on to ask:

“Do you have a can opener? Tara’s asking.” One more quiet moment, and then she returned to the phone. “Yeah, he’s got one. Do you want him to bring it over?”

“No, I’ll come get it,” Tara insisted.

“You know, I’m not contagious anymore and if he was going to get it, he would’ve gotten it by now.”

“I know, and I’m saying I wanna come get it.” She didn’t give any highway option, “I’ll be there in a minute.” She hung up the phone and bolted back out into the living room. “I’m going to go get a can opener from Danny! Be right back!”

“Okay!” Mindy called, while Chad added.

“I’ll time ya!”

She left the apartment and raced down the hall. She always loved running indoors, and because no one was there to tell her ‘No’, she ran the whole way. It felt so much easier than running outside. She didn’t understand why, but she couldn’t really care to know either. Something about it was rebellious but free at the same time. 

When she made it to her destination and knocked on the door, it opened fairly quickly. She immediately snatched the tool she had come for without actually acknowledging who held it out to her. However, she didn’t miss the chance to show her gratitude through her panting. “Thank you!” She reversed to continue her run back to where she’d come, calling over her shoulder, “I’ll bring it back at some point!” And that was it.

She made it back, shutting and locking the door, before tearing into the kitchen. “What’s my time?” She stared at Chad, panting.

“Oh, I didn’t time you. I was just playing,” he laughed. But he did credit her as he drew the spoon out of the pudding bowl, “You were pretty quick though.”

Tara let out a recovery sigh, while she rolled her eyes, then made way over to Mindy. “Here you go,” she passed over the can opener.

Mindy took it and immediately put it to use on the canned pumpkin. “Okay, as ironic as this sounds—because of our lives—if there wasn’t a can opener, I was just gonna take a knife to it,” she shared. “Like just stab the shit out of the top.”

“So, what, you’re now the Ghostface of 2024?” Chad teased.

Beside him, Tara started scooping the pudding into the prepared tin pan. “I actually think Mindy would be a pretty successful Ghostface.” She then directed her words towards the female twin, “I mean, you’ve come up with a monologue/game plan/theory for the last two. You could probably outsmart a lot of people.”

“Yeah, but what’s her motive?” Her boyfriend countered.

Now, his sister answered. “Uh, you.”

Carpenter gave a short chuckle. “LOL.” Then she glanced up at Chad, “You’re gonna be the first to die.”

“Okay, well, who’s your accomplice?” was the next challenge. “There’s always two killers.”

“That’s easy,” Mindy brushed it off, “Sam. She’s got a younger sibling that drives her nuts too, so we both have motives.”

“LOL,” her brother re-quoted his girlfriend. “You’re gonna be the first to die,” he continued, prodding Tara in the side.

She jerked her elbow back, nearly spilling the spoonful she was pouring. “Don’t do that, when I’m trying to pour! You’re gonna make me spill it,” she growled.

“Oh, yeah?” 

“Yes!”

Meeks-Martin lightly nudged her as she moved her arm over the pan, “Don’t mess up.”

“Chad!”

“What?” he shrugged innocently, “I just said…” He softly pinched the small slip of skin that showed from the separation of her crop top from her jeans when she reached over, “Don’t mess up.”

Tara threw the spoon down and swiped two fingers along the inside of the bowl. “Stop it!” She flung excess pudding into his face. 

Her partner was taken aback by this, flinching backwards as his eyes shut to avoid getting them involved. “What the fuck, Tara?!” He didn’t sound angry though—more like he was in amused disbelief.

Meanwhile, Tara was laughing. “Don’t blame me! You deserved it!” She licked the remaining mess off her fingertips.

Chad wiped his face. “Okay, you know what? Fine!” He grabbed one of the slimy banana slices and threw it at her. It hit her cheekbone and stuck to her hair as she froze in a gasp. “You like that?”

The other combed the morsel out of her hair with one claw-through and chucked it back to him, “You started it!”

“No, you did! Saying I was gonna be the first to die!”

“That’s ‘cause you are!” she fired.

“If I’m going down, I’m taking you with me!” he retaliated.

Mindy turned around. “I’m gonna kill both of you, if you mess up this kitchen!” she barked with the absence of anger as she went on to further joke, “And then Sam’s gonna come home, revive you, and then kill you again.”

Tara just laughed it off and shook her head. “Alright, we really need to get this done.” She used the outside of the spoon to spread the first layer of pudding evenly, before setting the bowl aside. “You can start the next layer, I’m gonna go get the rest of this banana out of my hair.” She playfully glared at her boyfriend as she made her way to the bathroom.

“Good luck!” he called after her. 

Once she was gone, Mindy snapped her fingers in accomplishment. “Okay, the pumpkin pie is done,” she announced. “Now, it’s gotta cook for 15 minutes, then we lower the temperature and cook it for another 45.”

“Aight.” Her brother finished up organizing the last row of Nilla Wafers before he added the bananas.

Tara came back a minute later and looked over his work. “Awesome,” she approved. She slid the bowl over to the pan again. “This is gonna be the last layer, so we can put the mini ones on top.” With a nod from him, she began slathering the last of the pudding over the top.

Mindy took the box of regular-sized cookies and leaned against the counter to eat them, while Chad tossed a banana slice up into the air and caught it in his mouth.

It didn’t take long, before the youngest cleared the bowl and pulled it with the spoon over to the sink. “Okay, go crazy,” she gave Chad permission as she rinsed the used tableware. “But no T.T.! Do, literally, anything else.”

He just grinned, while Mindy gestured to the intended box, “You heard the woman.”

As he opened the box and began to place them accordingly, Chad mumbled with a smirk, “But I like the T.T.”

Because its audibly enhanced meaning gave it a new perspective.

this was literally so random. I had no idea what I was doing lol. also, this was more "baking" than "cooking" but they both involve food so idc :D

Hope you enjoyed! ♡ - parker

[returntosaturn271995]

Saturday, September 23rd: Milestones

This time last year I was getting wasted at CRSSD and ended up spending my spending my Sunday with no ID or voice.

This morning I woke up early, meditated, threw on my baby blue work out gear and "Yes, Chef" hat and went on my farthest and longest run so far. 30 minutes, 3.04 miles. A good 5 K time (according to the internet) for a beginner runner in her 20s is 35.27 minutes. So I'm on track baby! Tomorrow I plan to run the 5 K. I am 0.06 miles away from knowing my current time.

My breathing is great, but my calves are a little sore. Okay a lot sore. Concrete isn't great for my joints. Grass and sand aren't great for my time. BUT I AM DOING IT. I'm 5 K adjacent. That's a win. That's a big deal even if it doesn't feel like one.

I got up and ran to the bay. It was beautiful, full of bikers and volleyball players. A couple of stoners set up a burger shop in the park area, appropriately titled The Fry Guys, the icon had a stoner with red eyes and french fries popping out of the top of his head. I bought a red Gatorade from them and petted some gorgeous golden retrievers on my way out. A day of progress.

I really needed to feel a win today and I'm not sure why. I ate the rest of ramen and ginger bok choy I made last night (lime and ground beef, chives). Coffee was coffe-ed.

I loaned the technicolor dress I was wearing today to Makenna for a dinner party she has tonight. Kelly and Kyla want to go out in North Park tonight so now I happen to be out of anything to wear but fuck it: sharing is caring. Texts from Kiera, Maddy, Nate Bayardo, and Kendall are currently pinging off my phone. Called Mom, and got old photos of me as a kid skating around from Dad. My Hinge is blowing up.

I don't know why I can't fight this intense feeling of malaise. I was high after my run, and now...bored? For the first time since starting sober September, I'm craving a drink. I'm sitting on the couch, tipping my head back and then pulling it forward to write another sentence about why...WHY...I'm not happier right now.

I don't want to give up. Maybe I just want a deeper reward. A sign that things are changing that I can't see even as I hit milestones.

The mantras are coming to mind. Fall in love with the process, worship your current step, look back, and see how far you've come.

Life isn't happening to you, it's happening for you.

Ugh, I'm so awkward sometimes. I just blew out my hair and smoked a joint in the backyard. Let's do this.

Girls night. Yaaaaaay.

[dzpenumbra]

7/6/23

Well whatta ya know, it's 5 AM again. Today was fucking weird.

I woke up like 3 times, but ended up getting a cumulative 8 hours... but still felt exhausted all day. Yoga was fine but my workout was really intense and I ended up almost hitting a wall where my muscles just couldn't push anymore due to weakness. That wasn't fun. But I got through it.

I was incredibly inspired yesterday, and today... fell flat. I got a lot of cleaning done, which I was totally into for some reason. But I tried to stream and work and I was just... falling asleep the whole time. And I couldn't figure out what to do, and I had been going for 2 hours... and no one was watching anyway... so I just ended the stream and played Hades. It's not the end of the world. I just... I guess it's just exhaustion? I don't know. I just feel really deflated. Which is so far from where I was yesterday.

Guess I'm just having an off-day.

I ordered stuff to make my own granola and trail mix, so I should have plenty of breakfast and snacks on hand. The catch is... I'm completely out until that gets here between 5-7 tomorrow. I guess that's not the worst thing anyway, it's not like I eat before then anyhow.

Such a weird schedule I'm on. I haven't been finishing my coffee until like 8:30 PM. I don't know how to fix it at this point. Not sure if I even need to. Very disorienting.

Ugh, I'm feeling very sluggish.

I found something this morning that really upset me. It was a big mark on my window where I think a mourning dove hit. There was bird shit splattered on the window and a little down feather on it, and a wing mark. I really hope it was okay, I've been feeling really really guilty all day. And I have no idea how to clean it. I'm on the second floor and if I open my window... it kinda just slides in and overlaps the other window? If that makes sense? And I can't really reach far enough to clean it. I tried and got some of it with my spray bottle, but yeah. I'm having second thoughts about the birdfeeder. It's only the doves that are... not the most agile in the world... I haven't had any problems at all with the Nuthatches or Cardinals or Blue Jays or Finches or Chickadees. But the doves were very clumsy and started showing up in groups of 4 or 5 toward the end there. So I just... didn't refill the feeder yet. And I'm going to sorta sit and think on that. Whether it's worth birds putting their lives in danger just so I can be closer to nature.

It brings up that concept of ahimsa again, "not harming". It's an obsession for me, at a Tartarus-like level. I am constantly obsessing about how my actions could harm others - physically, emotionally, psychologically - and I justify it under the guise of "mindfulness". But, ironically, this obsession is a form of self-flagellation, self-punishment... for things I haven't even done... which is... wait for it... self-harm. Man, what a guiltless life it must be to not give half a shit if you hurt other living beings in any way. I don't really know how to process reflecting on how I have harmed others. Or how to feel about the harm that comes to others by their own actions, but my actions played a role in that situation coming to pass? If that makes sense? Like... the bird. It's a sorta silly example to some, I'm sure, but go with me. If I hadn't refilled the birdfeeder, they wouldn't have gotten in the habit of coming to my window, and it wouldn't have smacked the window at some point and hurt itself. If I had noticed that they were congregating a bit too often (which I did notice), and removed the birdseed... that bird might not have come back. That's two possible alternate timelines in which that bird might have not hit the window, because of my decisions. Now... the fact that I did not make those decisions, does that mean that I directly caused that bird harm? That I essentially trained that bird to develop a dangerous habit? Or... did that bird make a dangerous decision on its own and harm itself? Where is that line?

Defining the lines on this is very hard. It's like rocket fuel for anxiety. What if? What if? What if? "If I go for a walk and pass by someone and my presence (my tattoos, the way I'm dressed, I don't know) makes someone uncomfortable, does that mean I have caused them emotional harm or does that mean that they are suffering from their own judgement?" "If I am in a conflict with someone who I want to preserve a relationship with, and they start accusing me of causing harm to them by doing something I am not doing... do I defend myself, and possibly cause more harm?" Infinite situations, infinite questions.

You'd think... that just having good, pure, pacifistic intentions would be enough. You'd think that just devoting your life to doing your very best to just breathe in self-love and breath out love for others, and cultivating the best Self you can muster that day would be enough. It seems miles beyond the goals of most people I've met in my life, who only really seem concerned with "winning" or making money or acquiring some material goal or just surviving through the day. But what do you do when your love... is misinterpreted?

A memory came to me. From a mushroom trip. I'm still in this weird place where... when you get older, your distant memories... they can get blurry sometimes. Like... you can be unsure if that's the exact memory or if it kinda blended together with a movie you saw around that time? If that makes sense? Add in hallucinogens and it really ups the ante, I'll tell you that.

This memory was a mushroom trip in a small rural village in the woods. We were in a country house that my friends were renting, and we prepared a pizza and put shrooms on it and I ended up eating the equivalent of 1/4 ounce. I'm pretty sure it was winter, or at least late fall. We went upstairs, it was incredibly dark... man, I can actually see the interior of this house, the dark wooden floors and bannisters, the sorta stucco popcorn ceiling stuff. I can see the actual layout of the house, it's crazy how vivid that memory is. We all went upstairs, but apparently someone turned the heater on, which was like... an actual furnace with fire in it in the basement. When we were upstairs, we played music. I remember it being spectacular. And I remember we played a cover of "No Rain" at one point. And we talked and shit, we were all sitting on a mattress on the floor in the room, I guess it was someone's bedroom. And they all left at some point, and I was up there alone after. And... I don't know if it was on in the background the whole time... but the movie Bruce Almighty was on. And I've experienced this twice now while on mushrooms... where if I'm watching a movie, one of the characters breaks the fourth wall and talks directly to me. And in my perception of the film, the rest of the movie is a blur, it's like... black and white and filler content... and then the scenes with the specific character are full-color and talking directly to me. And in this case, it was Morgan Freeman. And that really got in my head a bit, mostly because this had happened in the past... and I was alone experiencing this. And I have an anxiety disorder... (aka I get scared by surreal shit pretty intensely, and it's a very visceral emotional response) So... either the movie ended or I turned it off, I don't really remember which... but I was left in a dark room. I don't think it was completely dark, maybe there was static or a blue screen from the DVD player or something. And the ceiling was doing that fractal melty swirl visual thing, I remember that vividly. And then came the part that I'm afraid might be an overlapping memory of a film because of how... outlandish yet profound the experience was. I encountered... something. This is so hard to put into words... not the actual image of what I experienced, but how I perceived it. I don't feel like I perceived this as an actual manifestation standing directly in front of me, like I could reach out and touch it... but like... kinda like a shadow out of the corner of your eye... but in front of me. Or seeing something in your mind's eye... kinda? I don't know, I'm struggling to explain. But it was... like a giant mass of eyes. And I remember it unfurling a gigantic scroll of aged parchment and... at no point did it speak, it sorta... I just sorta knew what it was doing. It was reading me a list of all of my sins, all of the wrongs I had done. And I reeled, and I cowered like a child, and I curled into the fetal position on the mattress in the corner of the room until someone came up and found me. Apparently, they all went outside or something and it was like 200 degrees upstairs, because they left the heater on blast and all the heat went upstairs. I was fine after all this, there were some normal mushroom antics after that, but nothing nearly as profound as that experience.

That experience stuck with me for over 15 years. It changed a lot of my understanding of myself. Regardless of whether what I experienced was a projection of my imagination, or my subconscious, or an experience with an actual entity... it really doesn't matter to me. Because my big takeaway from that... is the classic spirit journey. The right of passage. The original purpose that tribal cultures used these mushrooms for, ceremonially. That was supposed to be a moment where I "became a man". Spiritually. Where I looked at my demon, my Achilles' Heel, my deepest fear and greatest weakness... and I did not back down. I shared the room with it, and met it as a peer. That is what a guide would most likely have aided with, or helped me translate from my experience after the fact. I thought for over a decade that I was face-to-face with Judgement. The eyes, the list... but... ever since studying Tarot... I really feel like the archetype that fits closest to that is Justice. True Justice, whatever spiritual language you want to translate that into. An aspect of God? Maybe an angel? Karma? Causality? I don't know. I've never really had a language for stuff like that since I grew up without any form of religion.

But I functioned for a long time on the assumption that Judgement was keeping score, and letting me know that nothing is forgotten. Which we could get pretty deep on how that's a pretty clear metaphor for my family and my upbringing... But more than that... the interesting part is that... I never interpreted that being as... a deliverer of Justice. More just... informing me so that I can go ahead and punish myself with guilt and shame. And hell, maybe that's part of the Justice, yeah? Or maybe it's indicative of a completely separate problem.

Why am I rambling about this when I should be in bed? This is a big core of my anxiety. Fear of Judgement, fear of false Justice. That despite my best efforts to be a truly good and kind and loving and honest person, someone's going to come along and put a fucking gun to my temple because they don't like the way I look. Or I accidentally made eye contact or walked down the wrong street. Maybe a bit of an exaggeration... but the feeling is of the same root.

And that... that makes this whole "non-harm" thing really messy and confusing. Because the road to Hell is paved with good intentions. So... do you get bad Karma if you have the world's best intentions and are pure of heart... but trip and accidentally hurt someone? I mean, it's technically causing harm...

I don't know, it's been in the back of my mind, I haven't been able to shake it. Food for thought. No tarot tonight again, until I can get my sleep sorted out... eventually.

[livingwithlosingyou]

Living with Losing You - 9/21/2022

First home meet!

Today was a better day. It had its moments, but doesn't that happen everyday?

I woke up and immediately forced myself to run. I knew that I would make me feel better, and I knew that I wouldn’t be able to run this afternoon since we had the XC meet (and we were hosting). I was still pretty sore from yesterday, so I didn’t go too quick. Anything is better than nothing!

After that, I grabbed Sadie, took her to her other camp (Mary’s), and then ordered PS on my way home so I could grab it before I headed to storage. The timing was actually perfect, because I got home and loaded the boxes in my car, then my order was ready right as I was finishing that up. I quickly grabbed it and ate on my way to the storage unit. I had a bunch of empty boxes from the items that I brought home from storage. I still have some things that I need to and homes for / organize, but I am proud of myself for getting as much done as I did.

On my way home from storage I called Thomas (we had planned to chat today since we have both been busy and it had been a while). he is doing well, the girl he is dating is also in medicine and her schedule is insane. We talked about how it’s sad how they’re treated. James, you deserved better. Once I got home I finished up that conversation then showered to get ready to go to my dentist appointment. I just want to note that I hate how expensive teeth are. It’s honestly insane. Anyway, that appointment ended up taking the full hour and a half. They needed to finish my crown and then do a filling in that back molar. I am usually totally fine with the dentist, but for some reason today when they were drilling on certain spots on those teeth I was getting very dizzy and lightheaded. I am assuming it could be multiple factors, but it was strange how intense it was. They actually ended up leaving the teeth a little more rigid because I couldn't take it anymore. I was supposed to go and visit Dar at his work after, but I went home to lay down instead. I still am not feeling great from it, but a little better (and it’s been almost 12 hours). 

I took that nap and just relaxed before having to go to the XC meet. We were hosting, so I had to make sure to get there early to help out. I was already running late because of the tooth debacle. The head coach ended up texting me asking to pick up name tags because the boys didn't have any. So, I left and got Chick-Fil-A, then headed to the local Office Depot. To my surprise the Office Depot was closed due to a fire? So random. So I ultimately just ended up going to the Staples near the high school. It worked out. Mostly. I was able to eat in the car again. 

When I got to campus, I helped Aaron chalk and set up the course. Unfortunately, the chalk bag broke and spilt ALL OVER. It got everywhere. I showered, but I feel like it’s very possible that I still have chalk on me. Today we got to use the gator which was awesome. It was helpful to not have to walk the entire thing. All of our teams won today! It was a solid day. During the meet alone, I probably walked at least 5 miles. It’s good though because I am really trying to finish the 150 on your birthday next Saturday. Which, HOW is it your birthday next Saturday. Ugh, I miss you so much. 

I picked up Sadie after the meet, and headed home. I connected with Bri and we went to get Mexican food together. This was a great choice, but now I am extremely full and cannot lay down. First world problems. It was nice to catch up with her, and then also talk about the bachelorette finale (even though I missed basically the entire season). Then she went home and I broke out my guitar and started to work on learning a song that I have always loved. I did ended up having a very tearful moment. I miss singing to you. Part of me hopes that you are watching me and hear me whenever I talk or sing to you. 

I do need to try and go to bed though. I work tomorrow, and it’s a very busy day. Thank goodness I have Friday off. I send Dom and Annie a baby shower gift that I know would be “Jake Approved”. I miss everything. So much. The little things, the big things we never got to do, etc. 

I love you. 

Rest in Peace, James Burton Nichols

10/1/1993 - 7/16/2022

[shemarmooresfedora]

A Bump in the Road

Summary: You and Spencer had kept your relationship a secret from the team until something changed your plans.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Content/Warnings: brief mentions of a case but other than that, just pure fluff!

Word Count: 1.5k

A/N: this is the first of my 3 fics for me and @samuel-de-champagne-problems 500 follower co-celebration! the prompts for both of us today were: Accidental Pregnancy, Reader/Spencer looking for excuses to hold the other’s hand, “I need to talk to you…like right now”. To see her fic today and our upcoming prompts: click here!

Masterlist

“Prentiss, Morgan, you go to the neighborhood of the victims. Y/L/N, Reid, go downtown and just look around for anything strange,” Hotch stated, “I need you all to look casual while scoping out the area so try to look like normal citizens and don’t flash your badges.”

Derek raised his shades to put them on but Gideon gently grabbed his arm to stop him, “Less official.”

Emily let out a chuckle, “Let’s go, Morgan.”

“You ready, Spence?” you grabbed the keys.

“Yes, lov- ,” he played it off as a cough, “Yes, Y/L/N.”

“That was a close one,” Spencer said as he adjusted his satchel as you walked out of the police department together.

“You’re the one who keeps almost calling me ‘love’ in the conference room in front of the whole team! And on the jet!” you added with a giggle.

“It’s not my fault!” he insisted, “My brain short-circuits whenever I look at your beautiful face.”

“You’re hard to stay mad at,” you playfully rolled your eyes.

You and Spencer had been dating for about 4 months now. You decided to keep it a secret from the team until your six month anniversary. You didn’t need the teasing at the beginning of your relationship when things were still a bit new and awkward. But now, you both had said ‘I love you’ and you were practically living at his apartment when you weren’t away on cases. It was perfect.

-

You and Spencer were walking down the sidewalk downtown, looking for anyone who seemed to fit the profile.

“Hmmm we seem too official,” you smiled, grabbing his hand, “I guess we have to act like a happy couple. You know, just for the case.”

“Yep, just for the case,” Spencer squeezed your hand, leaning down to give you a kiss on the cheek.

“For the case,” he grinned.

You cupped his cheeks and pulled him back in for a much longer kiss on the lips.

“For.” you planted butterfly kisses along his jawline, “The.” another kiss, “Case.”

Spencer opened his mouth to speak but was cut off by the sound of his phone buzzing in his pocket.

“Hotch,��� he said before swiping accept and putting it on speaker phone, “Hey Hotch. You’ve got me and Y/L/N.”

“Morgan and Prentiss caught the unsub trying to grab another victim off the street. They fit the profile to a tee. We’re bringing them in for questioning but we’ll take shifts. You and Y/L/N can go back to the hotel and get some rest first.”

“Alright, thanks Hotch,” Spencer hung up the phone.

“Oh I think there’s one more thing we have to do when we get back to the hotel room…for the case,” you winked, pulling him back to the SUV with your hands still interlocked.

-

You were in the bathroom stall of the sixth floor, anxiously bouncing your legs up and down.

The timer on your phone started vibrating, indicating the time was up. You stared at the stick in front of you, waiting to be flipped over.

You flipped it over quickly like ripping off a band-aid. Two lines. The second one was faint but definitely there. You were pregnant. 5 months into a relationship with Spencer.

You rolled the test up in toilet paper before placing it in your purse. You washed your hands and splashed some cold water on your face. You took a deep breath before walking back into the bullpen like you hadn’t just received life-altering news.”

You grabbed a random file from your desk as you passed by and approached Spencer’s desk. He looked up from his paperwork with a soft smile as he saw you coming.

“I need to talk to you…like right now,” you whispered, “About the Johnson case,” you spoke a little louder so no one would question what you two were whispering about.

Spencer began to stand and grab his jacket to follow you but Penelope came charging into the room, grabbing you by the arm and pulling you towards her bat cave.

“Actually, Penelope, I have to ask Spencer some questions about a case. I’ll come find you in a bit.”

Spencer nodded to back you up.

“Trust me, the news I have is wayyy more important,” Penelope continued to tug at you.

“Penelope, I really need to finish this. Just give me the highlights now,” you resisted her pull.

“I found a pregnancy test box in the bathroom and I didn’t find the stick. I’m no profiler but usually people would only keep the test with them if it’s positive,” she confessed, “Someone on this floor is pregnant!”

Your eyes widened and you mentally slapped yourself on the forehead. How could you forget to throw the box away?

You made eye contact with Spencer, shooting him a sheepish grin as if to say ‘surprise?!’

Penelope started to drag you along again but Spencer grabbed a hold of your other arm.

“Actually, Hotch really needs her to get this done, Garcia. I promise she’ll be over as soon as we finish it.”

Penelope and Spencer were engaged in an intense staring battle with you in the middle.

“Ugh, fine! I’ll just have to gossip with Morgan! Now you don’t get to know all my theories,” Penelope huffed.

“I’m sorry, Penelope. I’ll make it up to you at lunch tomorrow.

As she clicked away with her high heels on, Spencer pulled you into a supply closet.

“You’re pregnant?!” he asked.

“Um, yeah I am. I understand if this isn’t what you want though, it’s not really the timing either of us had in mind,” you spoke softly, rubbing your arm.

Spencer pulled you in for a hug, “I’m happy if you’re happy. I’ll support whatever decision you make. I can schedule you an appointment at the clinic and I’ll be right by your side the whole time. But if you do decide to have this child, have no doubt that I will be there every step of the way with you in raising them.”

“I think I’m going to keep it,” you smiled softly.

“We’re having a baby?” Spencer beamed.

“You’re gonna be a dad, Spence.”

The closet door swung open, revealing a confused Anderson.

“I don’t know why this is so emotional for you, Reid. We’re out of paper clips,” you crossed your arms as Spencer wiped his happy tears away.

Anderson grabbed some extra staples and scurried out of the closet.

“Most women tend to find out they’re pregnant from 4 to 7 weeks and we’ve been together for 15,” Spencer stated.

“Even your sperm is smart. They managed to get past my birth control so quickly,” you laughed.

-

You and Spencer decided to wait to tell the team until the end of your first trimester. After that, you couldn’t put it off any longer because you were beginning to show slightly if you wore tight shirts. Also, it was killing Spencer to have to pretend that his child was not inside your tummy all day.

You tried to schedule ultrasounds before or after work but sometimes one of you would have to take the day off in advance for ‘a family thing’ while one of you would mysteriously ‘fall ill’ the day of.

Your doctor had just given you the all clear that the baby was perfectly healthy at the end of the first trimester so you were ready to tell the team.

You wore a tight shirt with a jacket over it for the announcement. You let go of Spencer’s hand right before he entered the bullpen.

“See you on the other side,” you winked before sneaking off to the other entrance of the round table room.

You heard Spencer ask if everyone could join him in the conference room for a special announcement.

“What’s all this about, Kid?” Derek asked.

“I have been dating someone for just over 7 months now and she is amazing, beautiful, smart, kind, and I love her so so much. We found out about two months ago that she is pregnant. We actually just got back from the final ultrasound of the first trimester,” Spencer announced.

The team was speechless for about a minute.

“Congratulations,” Hotch finally spoke for everyone.

“WHO IS IT?” Penelope asked.

“She’s actually right out here. I have a feeling you’ll like her,” Spencer smiled.

You stripped off your jacket so your belly bump was on full display as you entered the room.

“Hi guys,” you waved as Spencer wrapped his arms around you from behind and planted a kiss on the top of your head.

The team erupted into gasps and cheers.

“You…and her???” Derek couldn’t seem to process this new information, “How did a group of profilers miss this?”

“Because my boyfriend is a genius,” you grinned up at him, giving him a quick peck on the cheek.

“No, my girlfriend is way smarter. She scheduled all of the ultrasounds and how to get the time off,” Spencer smiled down at you.

“Okay, we’re both geniuses so the baby will be a genius too,” you concluded.

Spencer bent down to give your belly a kiss as the team ‘aww’ed.

taglist (just ask to be added or removed!): @samuel-de-champagne-problems @g0lden-cth @spencerreid9 @averyhotchner @coldlilheart @k-k0129 @ickleronniekinsemotionalrange @harrystylesandthegoobs @cmily @jswessie187 @rem-ariiana @hoodpankow @mochionly

[toru-oikawas-milkbread]

Mattresses

October series: Day 26

Pairing: Daichi Sawamura x f!reader

Prompt/summary: “I bought us a new mattress since we wore out the old one”

Word count: 690

Warnings/contents: Implications of future sex, mild language, fluff

Notes: When I was debating on who to do for today, I decided that I wanted to write for Daichi, because we can’t forget about the trusty captain of Karasuno, now can we? I hope you all enjoy this chapter! 

<>~<>~<>

“Hey,” you greeted as you walked in the door. Ragged from long hours at work and now working the weekend shift as well, you were relieved to finally have a day off tomorrow and all you wanted was to sleep in. You missed your husband who peeked his head around the wall and grinned at you when he heard your voice.

“Hey!” His voice immediately made you smile and walk over to him as he walked around the counter and opened his arms for a hug. “I’ve missed you. It’s weird having the weekend off without you.”

“I know, it’s driving me crazy,” you said with a yawn. You knew that Daichi had taken off Monday because it was the first day in a week that you were off and he’d missed you, so he had worked yesterday on Saturday to keep a 5 day a week schedule he’s had since he started working while only occasionally adding a 6th. Despite the often tedious work of an officer, Daichi had a well-set schedule and he made all the time in the world for you. He had a bit of a workaholic lifestyle, but he’d made it clear to you that work didn’t hold a candle to you.

“Ugh, I know— I’ve missed you so much,” you said, immediately sinking into him and nuzzling your face into his chest as you lazily wrapped your arms around him. “I hate how long my hours have been, but,” you started as you pulled back to look at the man. “With extra money, we can live our best life.” He smiled, bringing a hand up to gently cup your cheek and gently stroke your face.

“Always looking on the bright side,” he said sweetly with a look of admiration on his face, leaning in to press a kiss to your forehead. “I admire that about you.” With a soft and content sigh, you leaned closer into the man and looked up into his pretty eyes.

“You’re always saying that,” you teased the man who only smiled. “What did you do today, my love?”

“Well, I bought us a new mattress since we wore out the old one.” You gave a cute laugh and shook your head gently.

“That seems like it was your fault.” He smiled and sighed in a feigned annoyed way as he playfully rolled his eyes.

“Alright, I’ll take credit. And then I went to the store, got some groceries to make dinner, cleaned up a bit, showered, went for a jog— before the shower,” he was quick to clarify, “And now I’m just making dinner.” He explained and you almost felt bad he had such a busy and productive day alone. “What do you want to do tonight, baby?” You seemed to think for a moment before a bit of a mischievous smile curled onto your lips as you ghosted your fingers along his jawline.

“It’s been a really long week— how about after dinner and cleaning up, we pretend to watch a movie while we break in our new mattress?” Similar to your own, a small smirk crept onto Daichi’s face as he gently squished your cheeks and brought you up for a soft kiss.

“I think that I could see myself enjoying that quite a bit,” he said, bringing an arm around your waist and pulling you against his body as he leaned closer to you again. “Maybe after we’ll have to take another shower together,” he sent you a wink that you flushed and giggled at with a bite of your bottom lip.

“You plan on making a mess tonight, Daichi?” You asked teasingly, something that your husband smiled lightly at as his fingers curled around the loops of your belt-hoops and pulled your hips quick against his own, earning a soft sound in shock from you and a deeper flush as you felt how hard he already was at the thought of being inside of you after a week of nothing.

“I plan on putting this new mattress through a very thorough intense night— just like I plan on putting this little pussy of yours through.”

[absolutepokemontrash]

MC’s half Demon, and they look AWFULLY familiar...

‘Kay guys, I got a different kind of stupid Headcanon to throw at you. Get ready!

Part 2 Lessons 1-5 Part 2.5 Group Retreat Lessons 10-12 Lessons 13-15 Part 3 Part 4

*ahem* picture if you will, it’s the day the exchange program is set to start. The student council (nix Mr. Kill All Humans, Weeb-supreme, and our Scummy Sweetheart) have assembled to welcome the new human student. All is going according to schedule, the portal opens up at eight am sharp, they hear the pitiful screams of the selected human who was not given a heads up about the whole thing, and the poor little human falls straight onto the marble floor.

There’s something a tad... off about this human don’t you think? After they’ve peeled their sorry ass off the floor they observed the assembled student council with an air of sophistication and self importance that no one expected. Their posture was perfect, their eyes sharp and calculating... they bared a striking resemblance to-

“Lucifer,” Diavolo looked to his right hand man, then back to the human. “The human kind of looks like you!”

And out popped four pitch black wings from the human’s back and two small horns out of the sides of their head, one horn was a bit bigger than the other. They even still had some of their down feathers! How cute!

((Content warning: Swearing (I have a potty mouth, forgive me), but that’s it.))

Luci-dad

So, the MC is Lucifer’s kid! Of course Mr. Prideypants immediately tries to recall exactly what little romp in the human world uh... spawned this half-human half-demon child of his. Good thing MC’s got the other parent on speed-dial.

“Please note, MC,” Lucifer pinched the bridge of his nose upon hearing Asmo take even more pictures of his newly discovered hellspawn. “I was not aware of your existence, if I was I’d-”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m not upset.”

Lucifer blinked a few times in surprise. “P...pardon? You aren’t upset?”

“No, my parent told me that my father was a high ranking demon, and they bare no ill will against you. Though, I am looking forward to this whole... exchange program thing.”

Oh wow, that was easier than Lucifer thought. Damn. Well, he was a father... (let’s be real, he’s been parenting his brothers for thousands of years, and a good chunk of you sinners call him daddy)

MC is probably the most protected student at RAD, despite the fact that they have no visible security detail whatsoever. They didn’t want to be seen as... weak and pathetic.

Something about this human just... set the lesser demons on edge. Any talk of eating them was stamped out on the first day when they walked by. It’s like Lucifer himself was staring at them, daring the demons to try and bother the human. MC’s powerful presence kept them protected and feared.

...at least until dear uncle Asmo decided to do their hair one morning. All those ribbons may have looked adorable but they kind of ruined the intimidation factor.

MC loved to mess with the other students, keeping their lineage a secret for the first little while just made it so much funnier when the other demons tried to scramble out of MC’s way without looking like they were running from the ‘weak little human exchange student’.

Oh wow, what a sadist. Like father like child

Flying lessons are a must. Poor MC isn’t terribly good at controlling their wings, and their horns are still growing in so when they pop into their demon form the first thing they get is a sore skull. Ow... it sucks that Lucifer isn’t outwardly very sympathetic.

“Ow!” MC crashed face first into the grass in the backyard of the House of Lamentation. “Father! My wings are cramping! Can’t we practice this tomorrow?”

The sight of seeing his dear child crash face first into the ground had lost its hilarity after the first three times. Lucifer slowly lowered himself to the ground and crossed his arms as he stood over his incredibly grass-stained kid.

“MC, we’ve been ‘practicing this tomorrow’ for the past month. If you want to learn to fly you’re going to have to actually manage to stay in the air for more than three minutes.”

MC shot Lucifer a withering glare that only preteens were capable of, Lucifer matched it with his own much more sophisticated glare.

“You’ve been flying for over a thousand years! Don’t you have any tips that can actually help other than ‘don’t panic, you’ll look ridiculous’?”

Lucifer dragged a gloved hand down his face and looked around, the two were alone as far as he could see.

“MC,” Lucifer began. “When I was a young angel, I needed to learn how to fly with someone else.”

MC perked up. “Who?”

“Michael. The smug bastard picked up flying quicker than I did.”

“What’d you do?!”

Lucifer smiled at his child’s intense investment. “I practiced flying every day for five extra hours until I could do everything that Michael could do, just better.”

MC’s starry eyed interest died almost instantly upon hearing about the extra five hours of practice. “Humph, I bet I could outfly younger you and Michael with only two hours of practice a day.”

“Really now?”

“Yes! Watch!” MC shook off their wings and took off in a running start before shakily making it into the air. Their form was decent enough, and they weren’t shaking as much as the previous attempts. “SEE?!”

“Yes MC,” Lucifer smiled. “I can see.”

You know what else Lucifer could see? MC crashing right into a tree.

“Ouch...”

Okay... maybe they could halt practice a little early and order a treat from Madame Scream’s. A little sugar to refuel is needed when the end goal is crushing a mutual rival beneath their heels. Just some good old fashioned father/child bonding time!

MC has a smaller seat right next to Lucifer’s seat in the Assembly Hall. I will not compromise on this one.

For all your fluff needs, I give you: Lucifer teaching MC how to play the piano. He has a proud little smile on his face when his kid finally starts getting it. That’s all. Enjoy the image.

That one Uncle who gives you Alcohol at Family Gatherings (Mammon)

Yeah, when Mammon burst in late to the party and whining about everyone’s spamming him with texts to haul his scummy ass to the Assembly Hall, the last thing he expected was to see a mini-Lucifer.

“What the fuck am I lookin’ at?!”

The glare the two Lucifers gave the poor Avatar of Greed was enough to make him want to turn tail (uh, wing) and book it down the hall.

“Mammon, this is MC. They’re my child.”

“Hello.”

“...whaaaa..?” Mammon looked between the two, same glare, same intimidating aura, same annoyingly good posture.

Mammon scratched the back of his neck and looked over at his older brother. “Do I uh... still gotta babysit em’ if they’re not human?”

“The lake of Cocytus will melt the day I let you babysit without supervision.” Lucifer grumbled.

“I don’t need a babysitter!”

Despite Lucifer’s initial denial, Mammon and MC ended up spending a lot of time hanging out when Lucifer was busy with paperwork. Of course Mammon’s first thought was ‘how do I profit off this situation?’

MC is now Mammon’s designated babysitter after they caught him picking up their feathers that had fallen off with the intention of painting them white and claiming they were Lucifer’s from back in the Celestial Realm.

Mammon does end up spoiling MC a little. Just a smidge. They’re the kid of his totally not his favourite brother after all! How could he not? Whether or not these gifts are obtained legally or are legal at all is subject to scrutiny.

“Mammon, I can’t drink this!” MC placed the bottle of Demonus back on the counter of the kitchen.

“Why not? That’s a bottle of the good stuff! We gotta celebrate you gettin’ an A on that test somehow!”

“I’m underage! Incredibly underage. I’m not legally allowed to drink.”

Mammon wordlessly plopped a silly straw into the bottle. “...does that help?”

“No.” MC then inclined their head to the bottle. “And I don’t want to get hung from the ceiling, that bottle was in my father’s study yesterday, I’m above theft.”

“How old are you s’posed to be anyway? Never mind... uh...” Mammon wracked his brain for something else he could do for MC that didn’t cost anything (don’t judge him, the poor bastard was flat broke!). “I could... teach you to drive!”

“Driving?”

“Yeah! Drivin’ is awesome! We can take my car!”

The bills for the damages done to the car and the Devildom were mailed to Lucifer the next day, and MC and Mammon got to keep each other company as they hung from the ceiling. Ah well! At least MC wasn’t upside down!

Mammon wasn’t that good of a flight teacher either, he also crashed into a tree (the same tree MC crashed into, actually) when he was cheering for MC. They were finally able to do a loopdy loop! He was proud and distracted! Okay?! Lucifer! Stop smirkin’ at him! It’s not that funny!

At least the vantage point from the tree was decent and the branches didn’t scratch him up too badly. Oh hey... that person walking by was wearing a very nice watch... he’d be right back-

That Uncle That is Always Absent From Family Gatherings and When He is Present He Leaves Early (Levi)

He missed everything. That is not an exaggeration. He was in the middle of an online raid battle and couldn’t look at his phone! No Lucifer he can’t pause an online game! That’s not how it works!

Okay, the human exchange student is half demon? WOAH! THAT’S JUST LIKE THAT ONE ANIME- W A I T. THE LITTLE NORMIE IS LUCIFER’S KID?!

Okie doke, he was fully convinced that MC just had to be an anime protagonist.

They binged every series that Levi compared them to. Sure MC might have missed a few assignments because of late night anime binges, but they were too good for this school crap anyway, right?

Nope. Lucifer put a ban on the two watching anime until both their grades improved. Surviving that hell brought the two together.

“Ugh!”

The sound of a pencil case being haphazardly thrown across the room made Levi peek out of his bed-tub. If his figurines got knocked over so HELP HIM-

“This is stupid!!I shouldn’t have to catch up with this!” MC crossed their arms and gave their Demonology textbook their best disapproving glare.

Lucifer Lite (tm) was having a hell of a time trying to claw through their missed work, and Levi sympathized, he really did, it’s just... he was playing Animal Crossing-

Levi paused the game to placate his anime-buddy when their wings popped out and he feared for his rare merch’s safety.

“H-hey, MC? Do you need help?” Levi’s offer was met with a bone chilling glare that lived rent free in his nightmares ever since. He had pulled a Mammon and forgotten he was talking to Lucifer’s child. Lucifer’s allergy to help must have passed down to MC.

“No! I don’t! It’s just... dumb!” MC hissed, she turned and looked over at the fish tank. “Right Henry 2.0?”

Henry 2.0 did not respond.

“MC, you need to finish your homework or we can’t watch anything together,” Levi sighed, he had finished his work over an hour earlier. He had mastered the art of all night anime binges and managing to do most of his work in the fifteen minutes between the time he woke up and the time school was supposed to begin. “We haven’t even binged all of volume 4 of TSL yet!”

“Mmm...” MC grumbled. “Fine...”

MC picked up their pencil case and began continued their work. Levi breathed a sigh of relief and went back to Animal Crossing.

The tiny normie did in fact finish their work, only after they caved and asked Levi for help. Swore him to secrecy, they did... very intimidating, they were.

Just saying, he most definitely sent that one Keanu Reeves meme with big Keanu and little Keanu but with Lucifer and MC to the wrong group chat. Poor bastard.

Flying lessons? No. Levi hadn’t flown since his time in the Celestial Realm, he had no advice to give other than: “Flap your wings!”

“THAT’S WHAT I’M DOING YOU-”

MC didn’t get to finish that thought, they lost their balance and fell right into RAD’s fountain. Ah well, Levi had a head start on running for his life that he squandered by laughing at MC. RIP.

The Uncle/brother/whatever the fuck that Starts a Fight With Your Dad at the Family Reunion. (Satan)

Oh... another Lucifer? Eugh. Gross.

Satan gave the kid a wide berth when they first met. Everything the kid said or did ticked him off. “Tsk. Look at MC. Making an omelette. So annoying.” “Oh wow, MC vacuumed? Roll out the red carpet, we need to celebrate their existence!” “Look at them. Breathing. Disgusting.”

MC’s pride wouldn’t ever let them admit it but... they knew Satan didn’t like them, and it hurt their feelings.

“Shhhh,” Satan whispered into his backpack.

“Meow.” The backpack replied.

“I said shhhhh.”

The backpack did not reply after that, which was a good thing considering the little princet of the HOL was nearby.

“Satan?” They asked. “Who are you talking to?”

Satan coldly brushed past them as he made his way to his room. “No one you need to concern yourself with.”

When the little calico kitten was safe in his room, Satan quickly realized a mistake in his foolproof ‘sneak a cat into the house’ plan. He didn’t have any toys for the kitten, and he didn’t want his books getting scratched...

It was alright, he’d just rush out to the a store that sold cat things and rush back! Five minute trip tops!

Well when Satan got back the cat was no longer in the room. Oh dear. He discreetly tore apart the house looking for the poor little thing until he ended up finding it in the library, happily chasing around a loose feather being held up by MC.

“Oh, hello Satan.” MC chirped as the kitten batted it’s adorable little paws at the feather.

“My... my door was closed. Did you let the cat out?”

MC shrugged. “I heard meowing.”

Satan ran a hand through his hair and grumbled. Stupid smaller Lucifer. Stupid original Lucifer. Everyone sucked.

“Let me guess, you’re going to run to Lucifer and tell him all about the meowing and the rule breaking.”

MC shook their head and glared at Satan. “Of course not. I’ve already gotten way too attached to this little guy anyway. We’re co-parenting this kitten like mature adults.”

With some coaxing, Satan did sit down and play with the kitten, maybe MC wasn’t... so terrible.

The two watch Unsolved Mysteries together, that’s their show. “This guy did it.” “Satan, we’re two minutes into the episode-” “Trust me.”

Thirty minutes later.

“He did it.” “See MC, what’d I tell you?”

Lucifer did find out about the cat, but with enough pleading, MC and Satan managed to warm up the cold spot in Lucifer’s chest where his heart should have been. The cat’s name is Detective Toe Beans (or just Bean).

Satan can’t fly, he has a tail, but he did read up on wing anatomy and how flight actually works in demons, his advice would be good in theory, but it’s full of so much technical jargon that MC can’t understand it.

At least MC didn’t crash into something, they barrel rolled through one of the HOL’s windows. Good thing it was the window to their room. The broken arm still hurt like hell.

The Best Dressed Bitch Who Brings The Booze to The Reunion. (Asmo)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Lucifer’s kid was SO CUTE! A thousand pictures commemorating that adorable moment needed to be taken! Wait- Lucifer- GIVE BACK THE PHONE-

Asmo, surprise surprise, absolutely adores little MC! So cute! So small! He was just so excited to announce to all his Devilgram followers that Lucifer was finally a certified DILF.

That post disappeared five minutes after it was made but the damage had already been done.

Asmo made sure MC looked their best at all times, if they needed help talking to anyone? Asmo’s got their back!

Sure, maybe he’s a little pushy, but pushy’s a good thing sometimes, right?

“Asmodeus-”

“No, these shoes wouldn’t fit you...”

“Asmo-”

“No, not these ones either...”

“ASMODEUS.”

Asmo squeaked and jumped upwards, Geez Louise... little MC’s voice could sure be scary when they wanted it to be...

“I don’t need any fancy new shoes.” MC huffed, sitting up straighter in one of the chairs in Asmo’s room. “I thought this was supposed to be a sleepover.”

“Hmmm...” Asmo pouted. “Makeovers are an essential part of sleepovers... what’d you do with your human friends up in the human world that could possibly be better than a make-over?!”

MC began to list things off. “Ordered junk food, talked about people we hated, watched movies,”

“Greasy food is so bad for your skin...” Asmo cringed and shook his head violently. “But I’m totally down to watch a movie and bitch about people I hate!”

“Ah yes, human sleepovers, a tradition I never quite had the chance to enjoy.” Solomon said from Asmo’s bed. “Who are we bitching about?”

“Remind me what Solomon is doing here.” MC muttered as they sat down in front of Asmo’s TV.

“Because, I wanted to hang out with my two favourite humans.” Asmo cooed, reaching over and trying to pinch MC’s cheek, which they awkwardly dodged.

“Can we watch The Exorcist?” Solomon asked, propping his head up with his hands.

“Ew, no.” Asmo made a face at him. “That scene with the vomit? Hell NO.”

“Mm.” MC mumbled. Asmo turned to look at them.

“MC? Are you doing okay? You don’t look like you’re having any fun...”

“I’m fine.” MC grumbled.

Asmo pursed his lips, as much as it made his little narcissistic heart break, he nudged MC. “Why don’t you pick the movie, sweetie. I’m sure Solomon and I will like anything you pick!”

MC noticeably brightened. “Let’s watch Scream!”

The strangled noise that came from Asmo was... concerning, but to his credit, The Avatar of Lust held his tongue about his distaste for the movie, and the three slumber-party goers had quite the lovely time.

After the movie ended, MC went back to their room, sure it was a sleepover but their bed was right down the hall.

Good for Asmo and Solomon. Horny fuckers. We stan.

Asmo just claps and tries to cheer MC on when it comes to their flying lessons. (The idea that Asmo came up with to wear his cheerleader costume from the previous Halloween was immediately shot down by Lucifer)

“You’re doing wonderful, MC- WATCH OUT FOR THE POWER LINE!”

MC didn’t hit the power line, but Asmo’s scream of terror caused them to fall butt-first into a dumpster. Their injured tailbone served as a tragic memory of the incident.

Oh well, good thing Asmo had nice smelling soap to give that could mask dumpster-stink.

The Uncle that eats everything and tells you to eat your veggies while you angrily pick at your broccoli at the kid’s table. (Beel)

Lucifer... has a kid?! Beel choked on the cheetos he had snuck into the Assembly Hall when the kid’s wings popped out.

Oh wow, that’s nice :) maybe they can eat together. Belphie would probably like them.

Wait what is the gender neutral term for Niece or Nephew?

...Nibling? Uh... let’s not say that around Beel. We don’t need him to get hungrier and begin associating MC with nibbling on things.

The Underground Tomb incident probably went a little differently, but after all that nonsense, the two are closer than two peas in a pod!

Mmm... peas...

“Beel?” MC stepped into the Avatar of Gluttony’s room.

“Hi MC.” Beel was doing push-ups in the middle of the room, on the ground right beneath his head was a massive bowl of spaghetti that he bit into every time he completed a push-up. “Can you come stand on my back? I need the extra weight.”

“On your back?” MC padded closer. “Are you sure? It’s not going to hurt?”

“No, it’ll be okay.” Beel assured them. “Belphie and I did this all the time. Except Belphie is normally asleep.”

MC tentatively stepped onto Beel’s back. It was a balancing act to say the least, they eventually gave up on standing and ended up sitting cross legged between Beel’s shoulder blades.

“You did this with Belphegor?” MC asked.

“Yeah,” Beel sighed. “He was always too tired to exercise, but he’d let me bench press him sometimes...”

MC frowned and hugged their knees to their chest. Knowing full well that Beel’s twin wasn’t in the human world like Lucifer said was absolutely ripping them apart from the inside. Guilt felt just as rotten as their pride did when they were being belittled...

“Maybe you’ll see him again sometime soon.” MC whispered. “Maybe my father’ll come to his senses and let him come back down to the Devildom.”

Beel paused his push-ups for a brief moment, then nodded and went back to his eating exercising combo. “I hope so. He’ll like you, MC. I’m sure of it.”

MC nodded. “I... hope so.”

Beel’s a pretty decent flight teacher, but his wings are just so different from MC’s that it renders any tips he had next to useless.

“MC, maybe your wings aren’t flapping fast enough.”

“Beel, I appreciate the thought, but I’m not a hummingbird. Or a fly. I don’t need to flap my wings a million times a minute to stay afloat.”

Ah well, MC tried to take some of Beel’s advice, but their lower right wing cramped up and they ended up flying in circles until Beel was able to catch them. Ah well, better than the dumpster incident the previous week.

The Uncle That Passes Out in The Basement and You’re Not Allowed to Wake Him Up Even Though All Your Toys and Video Games Are Down There. He Also Picks a Fight With Your Dad’s New S/O Before He Passes Out. (Belphie)

Sitting in the attic was quite a drag, and this supposedly weak little human was quite the annoyance to try and call out to. It took a lot longer than expected, but when he heard little footsteps coming towards his prison, Belphegor nearly jumped with joy.

Oh... it... looked like Lucifer. Smelled like Lucifer. Stood like Lucifer. Quacked like Lucifer. Or... trilled..? Whatever sound a peacock made, this brat sounded an awful lot like Lucifer.

A... half-demon. Hmph. Belphie honestly thought Lucifer had actual standards. Not anymore, he guessed.

(Man I could fill a whole-ass fic with the Belphie betrayal thing, but for now let’s skip to post attic nonsense)

Okay so maybe MC wasn’t disgusting. They made a good nap buddy. It was cute when their wings came out when they were sleeping sometimes. Well... it was cute when they didn’t hit him in the face and make him wake up with his mouth full of feathers.

What Beel said had been true, Belphie made a good substitute when weights weren’t available, but Beel didn’t want MC to feel left out, so Belphie and MC ended up sitting on his back while he did push ups. MC once got bored and started playing Go Fish with Belphie on Beel’s back while he exercised.

Yes. MC is still a member of the Formerly-Anti-Lucifer League.

“Are you sure he’s not going to be too mad at us?” MC asked for the dozenth time that day. Detective Toe Beans was wrapped around their neck like a scarf (he had gotten so big!!!) while MC nervously sat in one of the Library chairs.

“Positive.” Belphie said with a toothy grin. “Besides, he’s like putty when it comes to you. Just give him your best puppy eyes and we’re not guilty on all charges.”

Putty..? Really..? Lucifer..? How strict was he before MC got there... they wondered.

“Sh! He’s coming!” Satan stuck his nose into a random book, it was the Oxford English Dictionary... and it was upside down.

Belphie pretended to pass out and MC decided that the best course of action was to stare deeply into their cat’s eyes. Yeah... that looked casual and not weird.

“Satan, MC, Belphie.” Lucifer nodded to the three of them as he walked towards the entrance to his study.

“Lucifer.”

“Afternoon, father.”

Belphie let out a cartoonishly loud fake snore that nearly caused both MC and Satan to break cover and start laughing.

Side note, Bean had adorable widdle eyes! That cute little face was just to die for-

“You three..!”

Belphie, Satan, and MC peeked their heads into Lucifer’s study, their handiwork was perfect. Everything was covered in red post it notes. Perfectly not harmful, but SO inconvenient!

“You’re all cleaning this up or so help me-”

“GO!” Belphie and Satan each grabbed one of MC’s arms (Satan also grabbed Bean) and sprinted out of the House of Lamentation. Maybe they’d move back there in twenty years... they hoped that Solomon and The Angels would let them crash at Purgatory Hall...

Belphie had used up his physical energy supply for the next four years. He passed out the moment they stepped into sanctuary. Time for a nap...

Flight practice? Ha. Belphie’s napping. Though, he was suspiciously awake and filming whenever MC did something stupid.

“Try not to suck so bad.”

“GO TO HELL BELPHIE!”

“I’m already there. Hell is every second I’m stuck here watching you fail.”

“YOU’RE GOING TO GET IT FOR THAT!”

Well... MC mastered the dive bomb that day. Lucifer bought them a cake.

Bonus! Your Dad’s New Husband! That Has Managed to Somehow Make Everyone Hate Him Despite the Fact That He’s A Cinnamon Roll. (Diavolo)

A mini Lucifer? A mini Lucifer!

Diavolo dotes on MC like he’d dote on his own kid. MC wants a crown? They’re getting a crown! A damn nice one too! MC wants a title? Here! MC is now... idk Ruler of the area between Majolish and Hell’s Kitchen.

Poor Uncle Mammon’s got some financial insecurity, he’s still the cool uncle... right?!

He is very much that ‘how do you do fellow kids?’ Meme.

He tries to do stereotypical ‘dad’ things but he’s not very good at them. Once he tried to host a barbecue...

Barbatos saved the day, but Mammon’s hair was still singed, Solomon’s cooking still gave Beel food poisoning (SOLOMON EATS TOXIC WASTE I SWEAR-), Luke still got hit in the face with a frisbee, and Simeon got an unhealthy dose of DAD NERVES and got so stressed everyone was almost blinded by the holy light he suddenly started blasting. We do not mention the water guns.

(Seriously whose bright idea was it to give Belphie and Satan water guns while they were in Lucifer’s presence?)

Praise Barbie. He’s too good for them.

“Um...” MC awkwardly held up the baseball, trying to look at it from all angles like it was a completely alien object. “Lord Diavolo... are you sure you want to play catch?”

Diavolo clapped his hands and bounced on the balls of his feet. “Yes! It’s a thing human fathers do with their children, correct? We must make up for lost time between you and Lucifer, right?”

Lucifer massaged his temples and nodded. “If you two would like to play catch...” Lucifer grimaced. “I will too.”

“Okay! MC, throw the ball to Lucifer!” Diavolo instructed.

Lucifer half heartedly held up his baseball glove as MC tossed him the ball. He caught it, and looked over at Diavolo, who was applauding like he just witnessed the greatest feat in sports history.

“Okay! Throw it to me!” Diavolo waved his glove in the air, Lucifer rolled his eyes and smiled. He threw the ball at Diavolo with... a lot of force. Enough force to probably dent steel... Diavolo caught it like it was nothing.

MC suddenly feared for their safety.

“Okay MC, catch!”

Diavolo threw the ball with enough force to break the god damn sound barrier. Well, maybe that was an exaggeration, but the ball sailed way over MC’s head and crashed right through a window.

“Oh my...” Diavolo put a hand on his hip and surveyed the damage to the window. “This isn’t so bad, I believe in human world TV shows this happens quite often. Look! The glass broke in a perfect circle!”

“Yay... property damage...” MC murmured.

Lucifer sighed and pulled out his DDD. “I’ll phone someone to replace the win-”

“Lucifer no! Now according to human world customs we must,” Diavolo took a deep breath, rushed forward, grabbed both Lucifer and MC’s hands and started sprinting away from the Demon Lord’s Castle. “RUN FOR IT!”

“Di- Diavolo!” Lucifer gasped.

“Who are we running from?! That’s your castle!” MC squeaked.

“I don’t know! Just run! That’s what the human TV show says to do!”

Weirdly enough, Diavolo was the best flight instructor. MC’s ability to fly increased tenfold after Diavolo found out that MC was learning to fly.

“You’re doing amazing MC! That was a perfect turn!”

“Thanks Lord Diavolo, I’m surprised I haven’t crashed into anyone or fallen yet!”

“Well, I highly doubt you’ll be crashing into anyone anymore, your flying is practically perfect now!”

Mammon proceeded to fly past them holding what looked like Lucifer’s wallet.

“M-mammon?!”

“Oh... I wonder what he’s doing. Look, MC! It’s Lucifer! Hello Lucifer dea-”

Lucifer ended up colliding with the two of them and sending them all crashing to the floor.

That was the last time MC fell during flying practice.

(We currently have a Go Fund Me set up for Mammon to get the funds necessary to flee the Devildom after that incident. Please donate to save- oh shit hi Lucifer-)

[icantthinkofanythingcool3]

Hii I saw ur post about short blurbs and was wondering if you could do 5 or 13 🤍🤍

Well this did not end up being short 🤦‍♀️ but here ya go! Hope you enjoy!💜

It had been 2 years since y/n had moved away from Beacon Hills and half of her friends. Kira and y/n had ended up at the same college and in the same dorm. Lydia and Stiles both ended up about a half hour from them in different directions. The group was still close, but things were definitely different for all of them. Kira and Scott had grown apart and Scott and Malia had grown closer. Lydia and y/n had grown closer than before, they were always going back and forth on the weekends visiting with each other. Although y/n and Stiles were really close before, things had simmered down right before they left for school two years ago.

All their friends had sworn that the two were going to be together, even with college coming up. They were going to school close enough where they could totally still pursue a relationship. Somewhere though, Stiles and y/n had ‘grown apart’. At least that’s what their friends thought. In reality, neither of them really knew what had happened. It was like one moment they were falling for each other and the next it was just gone. Y/n and Stiles had both tried on different occasions to talk to each other, but something always got in the way.

Y/n walked into her apartment, that Kira was decorating...for Valentine's Day. “UGHHHHHH. Kira I thought we decided not to make a big deal out of this stupid holiday.”

“No...you decided that. Just because you’re still stuck on Stiles, doesn’t mean everyone else can’t be happy about love.” Kira announced.

“That’s not-no you’re. Ugh, whatever.” y/n replied, not having a come back, because what she had said was true.

y/n was still really hung up on Stiles, she was still so confused about what had happened to them back in Beacon Hills. There had been plenty of times since then that Lydia, Kira, y/n and Stiles had gotten together to hang out, even times when Scott and the others had come down to visit. However, their interactions were always strange and confusing. She hadn’t been able to date anyone else, and was honestly just making herself super unhappy.

“Before you make yourself too depressed, this was slipped under the door for you today.” Kira handed her a note, folded up with a huge heart on one side and y/n on the other.

“What...what is this?”

“I don’t know silly, clearly I haven’t opened it...since it’s for you…”

Y/n’s eyes rolled as the note was opened. It was typed and it read:

"When love is not madness it is not love." –Pedro Calderon de la Barca.

I have felt nothing but madness from the moment I laid eyes on you.

As she read it to Kira, she let out a screech, “y/n!!!!! Omg you totally have a secret admirer! This is so EXCITING!”

However y/n was doubtful, she left Kira to go to her room. Who on Earth could have sent this to her? Was it a joke? Was it real? The next day, nothing appeared under the door and it disappointed y/n, even though they would never admit that, especially to Kira!

The next day however, when y/n got home from work Kira was waiting impatiently by the door with a note in her hands. It looked exactly like the other one. She basically threw it in my face and stood over my shoulder as she repeated ‘open it, open it, open it’ in my ear.

This one read:

“Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.” – Jules Renard. This, I can assure you, is true. I make dumb mistakes every time I’m around you.

“I literally have no idea who could be doing this. I don’t talk to anyone, no one even notices me around here!” y/n exclaimed, confused.

“Well, you must be wrong, because someone is DEFINITELY noticing you!!!!”

“No, this is just wrong. This has got to be a joke or something. I’m telling you. Throw away any other ones, I’m serious.” With that, y/n walked into her room and slammed the door, she was done with this.

The next day was normal, but y/n wasn’t hopeful that she wouldn’t get another letter, and the next day, the 5th of February, Kira was waiting again with another note.

“You are my heart, my life, my one and only thought.” – Conan Doyle. You are the only thing I can think about lately, you’re in my every thought.

y/n didn’t know what to think anymore. Was this person a freaking psycho stalker? How did they know where I lived? We’re they stalking me?

“Kira, I know that you’re sitting here thinking this is some romantic love story...but what if this is some crazy stalker that now knows where we live? Like what if they break in and kill us in the middle of the night?”

“y/n I think you’re being a little dramatic. I feel like this is someone that has to know you in some way. This is some intense shit.”

“We’re gonna die...watch.” y/n finished, over the anxiety this was causing her.

Two days later, y/n didn’t have class. She was going back and forth from the front door, to her room. She was stuck between being excited and worried. Half of her believed that this was some kind of cruel joke, the other half thought maybe someone actually did like her. By 4 o’clock, she thought maybe that it was over, but as she made her way out of there room, there was a note by the door.

"Every heart sings a song, incomplete, until another heart whispers back." - Plato. This one may be corny, but it’s true, I feel this with you.

This definitely sounded like someone that knew her. But how could she be so oblivious? How could there be someone this into her and she had no idea. That’s why she still believed that this could be a joke. Like clockwork, two days later she got another note.

“You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” – Dr. Seuss. I swear since I started these notes, I haven’t been able to sleep at all. I know this is probably starting to creep you out, I promise that you know me and I know you. I’m not a random person.

“I’m sure that this is supposed to make me feel better Kira, but I feel worse. How do I not know this person likes me, if they like me this much?”

“Well, I’ve been thinking from the beginning of this, do you think it could be Stiles?”

“WHAT?” y/n asked incredulously, “Come on, there’s no way. First of all, that would mean he would have to drive a half hour here and back every other day to slip these under the door? There’s no way, that would be crazy.”

“I mean, you guys definitely had something and then suddenly you guys just stopped. You’re still awkward around each other, maybe this is the only way he can get you back?”

“No. Seriously. Stop that’s, that’s. No, that's crazy.” But later that night, what Kira said had gotten the best of y/n. She did something she hadn’t done in a while, she called Stiles.

As soon as he answered, y/n regretted it, “y/n? Are you okay? Did something happen?”

“No, no nothing’s wrong. Sorry, I’m not even sure why I called…...I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize for calling, you know.”

“Yeah, sorry- shit I mean okay. I-I gotta go talk to you later.” And she hung up, she felt so stupid why would she call him? Kira and these damn notes have gotten her head all twisted up. She should know better than to think Stiles could have done this, she was getting her hopes up just thinking about it.

Two days later, y/n could hardly think at work. Her mind was all in a swirl and she kept making mistakes and dropping shit, by the end of her shift she was exhausted. As she had expected, when she got home, Kira was sitting on the couch, holding a new note.

“Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere. They’re in each other all along.” – Rumi. I haven’t known you forever, but when I met you it was like I had known you my whole life.

“There’s only three days left until Valentine's Day. What’s going to happen? Is this all leading up to something? Or are the notes just going to stop?”

“I guess that’s the fun part!” But when y/n looked at her pointedly she continued, “I know this is freaking you out and giving you anxiety, but this could be a good thing. Whoever it is, really cares about you. And I’m not getting creepy vibes from any of this, if someone was going to break in and kill us, I think they already would have.”

y/n knew that Kira was right, she shouldn’t be so freaked out about this. It didn’t seem like a creepy kind of thing, the notes were sweet and heartfelt, and they definitely, probably would have already been killed. So all y/n could do was wait.

As y/n made her way through the day before Valentine’s hazily, she could barely focus. She kept texting Kira, asking if she had found anything yet. Seeing as she was still in class, she had not. Y/n wanted nothing more than to leave her classes and go to the apartment, but she knew if the note wasn’t there yet, she would get even more impatient. So when Kira finally texted her that she got home and there was a note, y/n excused herself from her class and rushed home. Kira was waiting, almost as impatiently as y/n, with the note in her hand!

“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.” – Lao Tzu. Meet me at Hilton tomorrow, 7PM, there’ll be a note left at the front desk.

“What? Kira, am I really supposed to just go to this random hotel and meet this random person?”

“I mean they said you know them, so they’re not that random!”

“I know a lot of people! It could be the cute barista that gets my coffee everyday! I technically know him, but would I go into a random hotel room with him? NO.”

“Okay, then I drive you there, and you keep me on the phone. If anything funky happens I’ll run up and save your ass. I think you should go. I see the look in your eyes when you read the notes, you’re excited. I haven’t seen you genuinely excited in a long time.”

Kira had saved my life multiple times, I trusted her, and it was a good plan. I was excited, she was right, I was stupid for thinking that I would get it past her. And I wasn’t exactly defenseless, I had learned to fight through many years of fighting off the supernatural. I decided it couldn't hurt, if anything it would end up a good story to tell one day.

The next day was torture waiting for 7pm. Especially since y/n had no class and only finding an outfit to distract her. y/n called Lydia in the morning, while Lydia had been pissed that she’d only just heard about this, she insisted on y/n video chatting her to pick an outfit. Together, they had decided on a blush pink dress, with a small flower design. There was a belt that tied right under the chest, that accentuated the top of y/n’s body and flowed down nicely to a little above the knee. They picked out black kitten heels, which according to Lydia, y/n should have already had. It was 4:30 when she got home, already ready to start her makeup to keep her distracted. Kira helped her do her hair nicely and put on minimal makeup, to highlight her best features. By 6, y/n was ready to get in the car, but the drive was only 15 minutes. Kira tried to distract her with finding things to fix, like an out of place hair, or too much highlight. At 6:30, she couldn’t distract her anymore and they got in the car. She drove slowly, constantly trying to hit red lights. Although, y/n had noticed, she pretended not, too.

Freaking out at 6:50, y/n got out of the car by the entrance. Looking at Kira who gave her a thumbs up, y/n walked in and to the front desk.

“Hi, um, I was told there was a note going to be left for me here?”

“Ahh, you must be y/n, yes?” The desk attendant said to me, smiling brightly.

“Yes, that is me!” I said, nervously.

“Here is the note, don’t be so nervous. I think you’ll like what is waiting for you!”

She looked at the note that looked the same as all the other ones. The note said:

Go to hotel room #33.

y/n double checked that Kira was still on the phone and went up the elevator to the correct floor. She walked up to the door, but was hesitant to knock. It took her a full minute and many deep breaths to finally knock. When the door opened, she gasped at what she saw.

“Stiles?” She asked incredulously.

“Hi, y/n. I was nervous you weren’t going to come.”

y/n looked down at her phone to see that Kira had already hung up, “I-I, the notes were you the whole time?”

“Yes, I’m sorry, I didn’t know how else to do it. I was freaking out about the whole thing. I know things got messed up before and honestly, I don’t even know why. I didn’t want to mess up again, and I just thought this was the best way to get you to see that I was sorry.”

Y/n took a minute to look around the room. There were two queen beds, both covered in rose petals. There was a small, pink and red bag on one of them. There were actually rose petals everywhere. There were small candles lit all over the room, lights turned down. There was a bottle of champagne on ice and room service on a trolley that contained y/f/flowers in a beautiful vase. It was beautiful honestly, and clearly took a lot of thought.

“y/n?” Stiles started, as she had not said anything after his confession.

“I’m sorry, it’s- I mean this is beautiful. It’s amazing honestly. I can’t believe you did all of this.”

“I’ve loved you for a long time y/n. And I don’t know how exactly we got all fucked up, but I was nervous and scared about what would come to us when school started. I’ve wanted to tell you everyday since that whatever was going on was stupid and that we should be together, but I never could get it out and I’m sorry.” Stiles was nervous, not sure y/n felt the same.

“I don’t know what happened either, if I’m being honest..I felt the same. Scared and nervous. I’ve literally made myself miserable everyday, knowing that I should have done something about what happened. I love you. I’m sorry too, that I didn’t do anything to fix whatever happened. I knew from the moment I met you, that we were meant to be more than just friends.”

Stiles couldn’t hold back after he heard y/n’s confession, his feelings had been overwhelming for so long. He walked closer to her, placed his hand on her face gently, and placed his lips on hers. At first, it was sweet and slow, but y/n moved her hands to the back of his head, pulling him closer. When they both ran out of breath, they pulled away smiling at each other.

“Can I ask you a question?” y/n spoke first.

“Of course, anything.” Stiles answered.

“Why are there two beds?” y/n wiggled her eyebrows.

Stiles face turned red and his hand went to rub his chin, “I well, I mean I didn’t want to-uh...I didn’t want to assume anything, I just, I didn’t want to mess anything else.”

“Well I don’t think we’ll be needing it.” y/n said and pulled Stiles back to her, placing her lips on his again.

[caleiiiii]

mcyt subway au pt 4 - ELECTRIC BOOGALOO

check out the master post here !

halloween

phil lets everyone dress up for the halloween weekend as long as they wear the nametag and hat

tubbo dresses up as a bee (it matches the pin on his visor :D)

tommy tries to “dress up” as schlatt, but gets denied as soon as he walks in the door

wilbur, the shift lead, decides that tommy can just. wear a sheet over his head with the eyes cut out

he has to wear the hat and nametag on the sheet tho

wilbur, quackity, and fundy decide it would be hilarious to all wear their uniforms backwards

hats, shirts, aprons, pants, it’s all backwards

wilbur asks fundy if hes gonna wear his fursuit (this is before the philza smackdown)

fundy is Not Pleased 

the dream team + karl dress up as hogwarts students

instantly the favorites from all the kids who come into the store

technoblade dresses up as a vampire 

isnt allowed to ring people up because of the fake fangs

eret dresses up as a king, also attempts to wear those like 5 inch platform heels

the reason he cant is because he kept hitting his head on things

niki dresses up as wednesday addams

phil told her she wasnt allowed to keep the crossbow on her :(

schlatt just shows up in his everyday clothes

when quackity asks who hes dressed up as schlatt just responds

“God”

no one else asks any questions

the proofer incident

one time tubbo was sick and couldn’t work his shift

everyone else was busy so phil let tommy and wilbur work it alone

since tubbo always bakes the bread, tommy had to do it

(for context, you have to proof bread before you bake it so it rises)

so tommy placed all the dough in the proofer to proof

but he didnt set the timer right

cut to a few hours later

the two are just finishing up a big rush when wilbur looks into the proofer

“tommy, you do know how to set the timer on the proofer, right?”

“what timer?”

tommy looks into the proofer

its just

dough

so much dough

(when you overproof dough it gets really big)

wilbur starts CACKLING 

tommy just. stares

they run out of bread that evening

languages

tubbo asks niki to teach him german one night

niki decides to hang up a bunch of sticky notes on items around with the store with the german word for it

fundy and quackity begin to do the same for dutch and spanish respectively

phil tells them as long as its in the back room he doesnt mind

speedrunning sandwiches

dream is hella good at making sandwiches

prides himself on being pretty damn good at his job

one day he hears rumors about a worker from another subway store who is super fast at making sandwiches

dream, curious, asks what location and decides to pay a visit to this newfound competitor

when he gets there, he meets illumina

the guy is just so fast at making sandwiches

dreams internal monolouge: “oh, this is my new rival”

as illumina is making his sandwich hes just like. mentally taking notes

he starts going to the other subway like about 3-4 days a week

everytime he asks for illumina to make his sandwich

every single time

time skip to two ish weeks later or smth

dream has made way too many google docs and spreadsheets over this

once he was editing it on the company computer and sapnap caught him and just stared in horror

he goes into the subway to order another sandwich and asks for illumina again

as dream is paying illumina kinda asks

“hey, so uh, is there a reason that you come in here like every day and always request that i make your sandwich?”

dream just. Freezes

its a weird conversation

the kitten incident(s) -an expansion on an idea by @trademarked-but-not-really !

schlatt, despite the façade he puts up, is a big softie

one time he finds a tiny kitten on his way to work

in a split second decision he just. brings the kitten to work

places the cat in his cubby behind his sweatshirt

during his lunch break he goes to the back room to play with the kitten

quackity catches schlatt holding the kitten and baby-talking it

“who’s a good kitty? you are! you-”

“uh, schlatt, what are you doing?”

quackity gets so much blackmail

“if you tell anyone about this you’re dead.”

quackity uses his blackmail to get out of so much stuff

after that incident, schlatt gets better at hiding the kittens

there are still some slip ups tho

phil: “is that cat hair on the floor?”

schlatt, hiding a kitten in his apron: “no... hopefully”

after his shift he always brings the kittens to the local animal shelter

he also volunteers there during his free time

one time niki comes in to adopt a cat and walks in only to see schlatt holding 3 small kittens

one in each hand, and another climbing up his shoulder

they just -stare- at eachother

needless to say, another person gains blackmail on schlatt that day

trade-offs

tommy, tubbo, and wilbur haggle and trade doing certain tasks

mainly sweeping the store and stocking the chips display

these trades get VERY intense

“i’ll start on freezer pulls if you sweep and mop” “only if you do prep work tomorrow” “deal!”

“i’ll let you bake bread and cookies if you also stock the chip display” “ugh, fine”

one day phil comes in to do inventory just to see the three boys standing by the task list screaming at each other

luckily only bad and skeppy were in the shop

schlatt and wilbur origins

when schlatt  first started working at subway, he always got paired with wilbur on shifts

(this is before tommy and tubbo started working at subway)

they got along like a house on fire

they always made up bets to complete while they worked

on their first shift alone they decided to play a hellish rendition of “the floor is lava”

whoever lost had to buy the others meals for a month

skeppy and bad agreed to be the referees for the day

they took extra chairs from the back and placed them around the shop so they could get around without touching the floor

they even put chairs behind the bain (the area behind the counter)

after they set everything up, the game began

from then on, they spent the whole day perched on chairs

customers were

very confused

to say the least

many tasks were done poorly or not at all in an attempt to win the bet

the two survive until the end of the day with no major failures

in a last ditch attempt to win, schlatt made a dramatic final speech and pushed wilbur from the chair he was standing on

skeppy recorded the whole speech

unfortunately, wilbur hit the floor just as phil arrived

the manager in question was PISSED

wilbur and schlatt were banned from working together in the future

feel free to send my asks about this au!! also, if you write/draw anything for this au, please tag me!!! i’d love it see it :D

tag list :)

@i-am-a-wizard @eva-ticket @oakskull @thesmpisonfire @trademarked-but-not-really @orange-is-salty-tm @pixelatedrose @hollow-hypocrite @astrono @nootella23 @hot-dumbass @jen-dot-net @karlljacobs @gearstorm @nico-nat @marvel-snowbaz

[uwua3]

if it's ok 😳👉👈 i really love your writing and i've had this idea in my head for awhile but i can't get myself to write it on my own 🤔 i wanted to see how your spin would be on it- so can i request a prompt where reader gets jealous of tenma's co-actress in a romance and tries to mimic what she does to him in a show they're in?? ty!!! 💕💕💕 i look forward to your interpretation

thank you so much for requesting~ ♡ i love you sososo much; i hope this lives up to everything you’ve dreamed of! ♡ ～('▽^人) i LOVE YOU!!! <333

summary: when tenma lands a role in your favorite drama, he had one goal: to become your favorite actor

warnings: envy/jealousy, food mentions, rivalry (all covered briefly!)

author’s note: after learning everything there is to know about the k-drama, true beauty, on tik tok, i’ve decided to write this! for context, the only thing i recommend watching before reading this is watching the “roar” scene!

this is also the first time i’ve introduced made-up characters with names! please enjoy jun, the first character who isn’t canon to the a3!verse :D

word count: 3,768

music: like a movie – b1a4

pretty u!

🌻☀️ sumeragi tenma

what the heck was love, and why did he have to be in it?

sumeragi tenma, future “world’s best actor”, was suddenly... seeing why he hadn’t won that award yet. with a script in his hand and confusion in another, tenma read the title of the next drama he landed the role for

“PRETTY U...” it was japan’s next major love story, advertised on every social media platform possible with the all-star cast in the spotlight already. although it had already been out for a season, tenma was entering as the up-and-coming newest character of the series

tenma was boyish, young, and much too confident for his age—perfect for the role of a second-lead bad boy who was going to steal the heart and test the protagonist’s commitment

except... he didn’t actually want to take up a new project so soon. he only did because—

“what?! you’re going to be chan on PRETTY U?!” he proudly nodded and watched as you began ranting about how much you loved this show. there was only one reason he came to the audition: tenma wanted to star in your favorite television series

you always went on and on about how great everything about PRETTY U was. after hearing so much and pretending not to listen (even if he could practically explain the entire plotline now without watching it), tenma let himself become a fan, too

after all, how could he not be a fan when you loved PRETTY U so much?

tenma didn’t respond to his manager’s pleas until one day, you revealed another reason why PRETTY U was your favorite production: the main lead

“he’s so handsome~ i love him so much!” “do you know him? could you get me his number?” “look at him... he’s the most perfect actor in the business right now—ah, sorry ten!”

tenma scoffed every time, claiming he could most certainly do better than that hotshot. although the boys typically didn’t do the same type of television, he had become tenma’s #1 rival without even knowing it

besides... what did that guy have that tenma didn’t? he was just nice! sure, he held open the door for the lead, bent down to tie her shoes, bended over backwards just to be the perfect boy-next-door. yeah... even he couldn’t pretend anymore

tenma pouted at the thought, skimming over his next pilot episode for rehearsal tomorrow. he was too good to be real, after all, he was meant to end up with the lead girl anyways (spoiler alert!)

but, it didn’t matter how perfect that actor was! because tenma had gotten the role of “chan”, the leather-jacket wearing mystery with an actual heart of gold, and he was going to make the entire audience swoon

(though, tenma just wanted to make your heart skip a beat when he ended up on the big screen)

tenma would never admit how fast he checked his phone when he felt it buzz in his pocket. sure, it was unprofessional during rehearsal but he knew it was you. however, his smile dropped the moment he read what you sent

you: remember to tell him how much i love him!

tenma: hah... no good luck for your new bad boy?

you: you know i’ll always root for you, ten!

tenma: but, i’m better than that actor, right?

tenma watched his message get delivered and was about to keep bothering you until someone called his name like they were friends. speak of the devil...

that actor’s straight, white toothy smile made tenma stand a little straighter (damn it, tenma was shorter), eyes wide as the actor gracefully introduced himself as his co-star for the next month or so (how did his voice sound even better in person?!)

“good morning, tenma! my name is jun, i’m so honored to meet a fellow actor on set! let’s work together well!” were they... really the same age? tenma barely registered the fact he was suddenly shaking jun’s (right, that’s his name) hand. why did he have such a manly grip?

tenma quickly (to his dismay) found out that him & jun had entered the industry around the same time but often had different projects, so they were never featured in the same production before. apparently, that was creating quite a buzz in the media that two childhood stars were competing against one another

a competition that tenma couldn’t lose. he was going to be your favorite actor, not his rival!

jun, like the perfect gentleman everyone described him to be, showed tenma around the PRETTY U set. jun had nothing but good things to say about the crew and vise versa. that only reinforced how tenma was oddly much more quiet than he usually was. luckily, one of the talents of being an actor was improvising, so jun was doing just fine

when they had reached the dressing rooms, jun shot a bright smile at tenma and gestured to the rather large room

“we’ll be sharing a dressing room together, tenma! we’ll be spending a lot of time together!”

tenma suddenly regretted his decision to become chan of PRETTY U. you couldn’t have had a different favorite show?! anything but... this

there were now three main characters for PRETTY U: hoshi, yuri, and chan, creating a love triangle for millions of viewers to watch every week

nakamura jun, leading role, played “hoshi”, the boy-next-door. this is the popular boy at school with the best grades and an even greater reputation amongst everyone. next, uedo ren, one of japan’s rising female actresses of this generation. she is adored as “yuri”, the perfect girl. she is the typical nerd who suddenly transformed into the prettiest girl at school from learning make-up

last (but definitely not least!) is sumeragi tenma, playing “chan”, the bad boy. it was nothing like tenma’s done before, since the character was much less expressive than he was used to. chan is a traditional rebel who is revealed to have a soft side for yuri. but, chan (ironically enough) has a secret history with hoshi, causing tension in this already confusing love triangle

(embarrassingly enough, jun had to explain to tenma the complications and ties between each character. tenma, unfortunately, found it to be extremely helpful)

even with this newfound knowledge of the characters in season 2, tenma couldn’t help but absolutely ruin the first day of rehearsals. even with a decade or so of acting as his experience, one thing kept him from being chan: his lack of chemistry with “yuri”

“cut!” the director called out again for the nth time, sighing as their eyes landed on tenma, who was not enjoying being the center of attention this time, surprisingly

“take 5, kid. once you come back, i expect you to actually go through this scene without messing up your lines.” tenma nodded and exited quickly, feeling flustered from the looks of sympathy directed his way. usually, it was one-and-done. it didn’t take a hundred tries just to do another romantic and cliché scene

tenma exhaled loudly once he felt the fresh air upon his face. without the fear of cameras in his face anymore, tenma ran his hand through his hair with a frustrated kick at the concrete. come on! he was renown child actor sumeragi tenma, why was he so in his head now?

tenma was about to yell into the sky before he heard someone close the door, standing beside him with their usual silence. tenma didn’t even have to look to know it was jun (probably with the most pitiful look ever)

“tenma? are you okay?” jun waited as tenma tried to not say anything he’d regret, shifting his weight on his foot back and forth before relenting, shrugging as if it couldn’t be helped

“i don’t know... i just, i can’t see yuri that way. how am i supposed to flirt with someone i don’t even like?”

jun pondered the thought for a moment, before tilting his head, a boyish smile overtaking his features. tenma unwillingly relaxed; jun finally looked his age

“who do you like then?”

tenma froze, a blush even foundation couldn’t hide blossoming on his cheeks. jun let out a teasing “oooh!” as he nudged tenma with his shoulder, who pushed back with an eye-roll

“i-it’s not like that! don’t be so—ugh!” tenma cut himself off, rubbing the back of his neck and avoiding jun’s knowing eyes. damn it, they barely knew each other. why was he getting so comfortable with his enemy?!

“well, whoever you thought of, imagine yuri as them.”

“is that what you do?”

jun shrugged, not giving a clear answer for once. before tenma could ask for more information, their break was over

when tenma returned to the scene, he took a deep breath and closed his eyes. when he opened them again, he watched as yuri transformed into the one person he’s been trying to impress this entire time: you

when “you” smiled, tenma couldn’t help but follow along. his first-take after break made the cut for the final product

“you must really like them, tenma~” — “stop!!!”

filiming afterwards became easy, especially when he imagined all his romantic words were directed towards you. he could feel the clamminess of his hands, the rapid beat of his heart, the intense blush across his face, all at the thought of you

(the only time he had to start over was when he accidentally said your name instead of yuri’s)

tenma was sure he’d become your favorite actor now! after all, you were his favorite person

“will you watch the first episode of PRETTY U’s season 2 with me?”

you had never said yes so fast in your entire life. when tenma learned there’d be a cast-viewing of episode 1 after finishing the season, he knew his +1 invite could only go to the biggest fan of the show

throughout filming, you were always the person who got him in trouble when the text tone wasn’t put on silent. you liked spamming tenma with a bunch of supportive and encouraging messages when you were available, meaning tenma always had something to look forward to after each scene

in return, tenma would send a selfie of him with his castmates or the set (or, what he was allowed to show under his contract). yet, despite your constant pleas, there was one co-star he’d never take a photograph with: jun

(“tenma! we’ve worked together for months~ shouldn’t i be called your friend now?” “no—” “huh?! don’t pretend you don’t like me!” “who said i was pretending?” “tenma!”)

at first, tenma was apprehensive about inviting you to an event where jun’s picture-perfect face would be on display everywhere. but, whenever he saw you, the weight of the tickets suddenly felt much heavier in his pocket. he couldn’t deprieve you of such an exclusive event just because of his jealousy (even if he was this close to doing so)

when tenma impulsively asked three days before, it felt worth it when you threw your arms around him (he hugged you back and pretended this meant something to you)

“i love you, ten!”

tenma felt like he was on set again, with yuri’s arms tightly holding onto his heart

“i love you, too.”

even after saying it so many times, tenma meant it even if he didn’t say it to your face every time

you looked like the star of the show

tenma fixed his tie as his blazer suddenly felt too tight. you appeared in your most formal attire, looking like a million bucks as you two sat across each other in the limo

“ten, look at all of this!” you pointed out every little thing of preparing for a professional event. the little glasses of champagne neither of you two could drink sat to the side as the leather seats molded to fit your posture. as the night lights of tokyo blurred by, tenma couldn’t help but think you sparkled more than this diamond of a city

“i can’t wait to go see the first episode! thank you for inviting me.” you bowed your head, as if suddenly overcome with gratefulness. tenma lightly kicked your shoe with his, fondly rolling his eyes as he tried not to smile (mission failed)

“don’t worry about it, who else would i bring? you’re my favorite pe—friend. friend, yeah...” tenma trailed off, suddenly finding something very interesting outside of the window. you only nodded, seemingly more interested in the fact there was enough room to walk around

when tenma caught sight of the infamous red carpet laid out in front of the theatre, he cleared his throat and put on his best face for the cameras. after stepping out of the car with his bodyguards nearby, tenma turned and gave you a genuine smile. not his typical arrogant smirk the news source ate up, but a type of smile only reserved for you

when he held out his hand, the flashing lights behind him seemed like a real celebrity, something you had never considered him to be before. it was like seeing tenma in a new light (both literally and figuratively)

“shall we?” you took his hand and wondered if you could ever have your own j-drama. perhaps, tenma could even be the main lead...

before you could step off to the side, tenma already had his arm wrapped around your waist with his unchanging expression (however, underneath it all, he was internally freaking out. what was he going to do now?!)

“you’re my date, right? walk the red carpet with me.” tenma winked (you swore it sparkled) as he gestured towards the carpet ahead. suddenly, the line seemed much longer

“t-ten... you’ve never brought a date before...” you mumbled, acutely aware of how soon it was to walk down together. tenma’s arm stiffened, but nothing else exposed the revelation as he looked down at you

“you’re my first, then.” and my last, tenma thought to himself. before you could change your mind, it was showtime. tenma put on his movie star face and introduced you to familiar interviewers, smiling away as if you two weren’t panicking on the inside

while you were focusing on the fact you were going to be going viral as tenma’s first “date” to the event, tenma was trying not to blush from how close you were. you felt... right besides him

tenma was a natural in front of an audience waiting for him to make a mistake. he flawlessly answered every question with swaggering confidence, his stride easy and poses photogenic

you did your best to follow his lead but it all ended when tenma took you into the theatre, staring down at you with a bright smile

“we did it! see, told you we’d be just fine.” tenma let out an exhale of relief, glowing with joy from the adrenaline of everything that came with being a superstar. as you looked up into his excited eyes, you saw him lean down before—

“your arm is still around me.”

silence, then a hurried separation as tenma put too many feet between you two. it was suddenly as if you two were strangers. you regretted the words the moment they left your mouth; you didn’t mind at all... why did you say something?!

“um... so, food?” tenma spoke up after an eternity of making excuses. you two quickly moved to the line of movie snacks, using candy and popcorn to substitue the suddenly awkward silence

when tenma ordered all your favorites without even asking, he turned around with the selection only to close his eyes and internalize every single thing he was feeling because there he was, his worst enemy

jun entered from a side door, most likely finishing up helping the crew with set-up (and 30 minutes early as usual) before catching tenma’s iconic bright orange hair, a grin lighting up his face

“tenma! it’s me, jun!” he said, as if they weren’t the two main leads of japan’s most famous drama so far. immediately, your smile matched jun’s as you watched as your favorite actor of all time make his way towards you two

“jun... of course you’d be here.” tenma said through gritted teeth, forcing a pleasant smile even with an armful of junk

“ah, still keeping the bad boy attitude? we’re off set now, you can stop method acting now.” jun joked, bringing his attention to you with a dazzling smile that would absolutely make any fansite’s career

“oh? who is this, a friend of yours?” tenma tried not to sigh so loud when you couldn’t help yourself and burst into a long rant about how amazing jun was. tenma waited until you reached your midpoint and stopped you with a quick nudge, trying not to scream (could jun stop being so... perfect? could you stop being so cute?!)

when tenma introduced you, he stood a little closer as he tried to maintain his jealousy. “they’re my date, by the way.” no one had asked, but tenma was clearly telling anyone who was around you two had gone together

jun’s eyes lit up in recognition as he let out a noise of surprise. “ah~ so this is who you—”

tenma didn’t regret losing his giant popcorn so fast to a co-star who could only be silenced with food. his wallet could afford another one, anyways. his pride on the other hand? could not let you know his acting secret already

“what was jun going to say?” you asked after you two departed for the viewing room. tenma nonchalantly pretended like everything was okay as he guided you to front row

“probably something about the fact you’re the one who always interrupts our scenes.”

“hey! my texts make your day, don’t lie!”

“go sit down and eat already, jeez.”

when it began, your eyes couldn’t leave the screen. it was better than you could have imagined. everything was perfect, it exceeded the standards of even the toughest fans out there. you loved every second of it... except...

tenma was too good at being chan. even with his bright hair, the dark clothes he wore made him appear intimidating, with his sharp eyes and even sharper smirk. chan’s appearance was tough, rough, and mean, everything tenma wasn’t

yet, you still couldn’t help but feel your heart sink when chan was clearly in love with yuri. yuri was one of your favorite characters by far, but she ended up bothering you for the entireity of the episode

especially every time she shared a scene (which were many times) with chan. chan was revealed to be a bad boy with a heart of gold, all with a special soft side for yuri

what was this feeling? were you... no, you couldn’t be! after all, you had never seen tenma that way before, right? yet, every time chan made an exception for yuri, you felt sick to your stomach

was it possible that tenma liked the actress who played yuri? you snuck a glance at tenma, only to see he was looking at you already (he’d never admit it, but he was watching your reactions to see if he made you proud. yet, every time you saw him, you subconsciously frowned)

were you not proud of him? did you not like his performance as chan?

before tenma could ask you, the scene changed into one of chan’s. he was standing outside in the school uniform, his head ducked as he swiped through yuri’s social media. before he could look up, yuri jumped in front of him with a teasing smile

“roar!” she called out, referring to their inside joke earlier in the episode. yuri cutely bounced back with another roar, holding her hands up like paws. chan watched, his typical rock-hard expression breaking to reveal his developing feelings for yuri

later on, chan stopped yuri in the hallway, other students watching as the school’s bad boy and goddess interact

“do that again.” chan demanded to which yuri innocently tilted her head, confused like a little puppy. “do what?” “that... that thing.” when chan roared, tenma sunk into his seat with an embarrassed defense and explanation ready. but, when he looked, you finally cracked a laugh at his little roar

your smile only fell when yuri roared again as a joke, but chan smiled for once. tenma wondered why... he thought you would be so happy to be here with him. maybe, he’d never be better than jun...

when the episode ended, it took a moment before you stood up and clapped. tenma followed along, but all he could think about was how he let you down. not only as chan, but as your boy, too

when you two left the room, you two hung back to watch as everyone congratulated one another on the success of the production. in the midst of the cheer and celebration, tenma felt small as he watched your blank expression

what did he do wrong? he put his best efforts into every scene; he might even say it was his best work yet. before he could apologize, you did the unthinkable: you roared

you jumped up into his face, holding your hands up like yuri did. when yuri did it, tenma didn’t feel a thing. but, when you did, tenma felt it. the butterflies fluttered in his stomach as he stared at you, frozen in place

“this is the part where you ask me to do it again.” you shyly trailed off, about to put your hands down before tenma weakly put his hands up, knowing he was about to regret his next move (if the embarrassment didn’t kill him, he didn’t know what would)

“roar!”

that was too loud, wasn’t it? the room suddenly went a lot more quiet as they turned their attention towards a teen actor roaring at his date

“yah! why didn’t you ask me the next line?”

“b-because... i know i like you even without you doing, that, again.”

you paused, taken back by his honesty. as tenma contemplated just falling onto the floor right then and there, you suddenly hardened your expression, standing up straighter with your arms crossed

“do that again.”

“do what?”

“that thing.”

when tenma roared again, much quieter this time, you nodded as you finally smiled genuinely for the first time ever since that episode started

“good, i know how chan feels now. i like you, too.”

“does that mean i’m your favorite actor now?”

(when jun released a video of tenma roaring online, he captioned it with “ROAR = ILY!!!” tenma realized maybe he wasn’t all that bad, but still)

[whentherewerebicycles]

wow okay i am skipping the lingerie party lol and am instead going to just briefly jot down some thoughts before i go to sleep and wake up at 5 for my flight tomorrow morning. jesus christ i have ONE MILLION thoughts and feelings about this weekend. i want to preface this by saying that on the whole, it was a fine social experience! it was nowhere near as awkward or painful as i was expecting. or like, parts of it were painful, but it was 100% to do with my own complicated feelings about literally every part of this tradition and the wedding industry in general lol, and not anything to do with the people themselves. the other women were friendly and very welcoming, i made an event best friend who was wonderful company, and it was really fun to get to spend time with both my sister-in-law and her older sister, who was so charming and wonderful. i’m glad i came even though thinking about the $$ i spent on this trip makes me physically gag.

but okay i want to just record some THOUGHTS that maybe i will continue unpacking with some distance. i feel likeeeee okay here are my thoughts.

the social norms around femininity are just a fucking minefield and i feel like i really just gotta keep walking back the impulse to judge other women for the choices they make as they navigate around the manifold traps and snares and half-buried landmines that constitute the landscape of being a woman. like jesus christ. it’s so fucked up, it’s so fucked up, the received and socially enforced norms of femininity are just so fucked up. I think ALL THE FUCKING TIME of this margaret atwood poem i love so much, which was REALLY on my mind this weekend:

How can I teach her some way of being human that won’t destroy her?

I would like to tell her, Love is enough, I would like to say, Find shelter in another skin.

I would like to say, Dance and be happy. Instead I will say in my crone’s voice, Be ruthless when you have to, tell the truth when you can, when you can see it.

I feel like the first bit was very much on my mind throughout the weekend, but those last three lines have come to the forefront over the course of this last day, as i have tried to do some Thinking about what i observed/experienced/felt this weekend. whether or not this is what it means in the context of the poem, tell the truth when you can, when you can see it, expresses something of my complex feelings: I don’t know that I can tell the truth about femininity because I don’t know that I can see it. i am both too close to it/still emotionally entangled in it and too far from it to know which parts of it are ‘real’ and which parts are just performance.

i feel like one thing that struck me this weekend, in ways that i don’t know if i’ve noticed as much before, was that so much of the things women say to each other or do in these social contexts is performative, and they know on some level it’s a performance, but we are all going through the motions of doing and saying the expected things anyway. that has not always been clear to me. i have spent so much of my own life as a woman thinking that other women perfectly, seamlessly, naturally embodied the norms of femininity, and i was the only one (or part of a group of only ones) who couldn’t remember my lines, or kept fumbling my cues, or felt so painfully, self-consciously aware that i was playing a role that i could never deliver a convincing performance. but this weekend, after the initial social panic had passed, i started trying to get out of my own head a little bit and look for things that disproved the very strong theory i had brought into the weekend. and of course then i started seeing more and more of the little moments where women say one thing and do another, or profess one belief/conviction but then the whole corpus of their lived experiences and choices contradicts that stated belief, or whatever. and also just like, moments of pathos, where someone i had judged harshly at the beginning of the weekend offhandedly revealed something about her past that really changed my perception of her, or at least made me think like, ah god, i have to have empathy for and with this person, because i think she might be a complex person just like me, with an intricate inner life that her performance partially reveals and partially occludes from view, and agh, it sucks to have to think of people as complicated instead of as safely two-dimensional & easy to dismiss, and the reason it sucks is because then it forces you to realize that you share more with this person than you’d like to admit, and that some of your wounds are the same, even if you dealt with those wounds (the wounds of girlhood, or rather the emotional wounds that our culture inflicts upon girls, which then become tangled up in complex and painful ways with the lived experience of girlhood itself) in really different ways.

but also ugh. we are all performing gender norms but there is just something that does not feel playful at all about embodying conventional femininity. i can’t think of a better way to phrase that right now but it’s like.. the performance isn’t fun. it doesn’t seem to be fun. i don’t know that anyone here was having fun doing it, even if they were having fun being with each other. but it was like doing the intensely gendered social rituals was like, the price of admission? like it was the toll we had to pay to be together spending time in the company of other women? i don’t know man but it fucking exhausts me. like i can push myself to stretch my genuine empathy and sense of solidarity with other women much further than my knee-jerk judgmental reaction, but i can’t ever get to a place where i find any of those social rituals anything other than fucking exhausting. they feel so fucking joyless. they feel like things that many women have internalized as ‘things we must do in order to have relationships with other women.’ (please do not even get me started on how exhausting heteronormativity is i think i could write an entire other essay on how women use these bachelorette party-type rituals to spend time with their closest female friends, but the whole event is still implicitly organized around men, and these women’s male partners are still positioned as the priority in their lives, and the whole event is framed as like, a last burst of intense closeness between women before the bride is delivered over to her husband. like i KNOW that this is not how women think of it but all the RHETORIC of the bachelorette party, the little events and rituals and games, the little comments everyone makes all fucking weekend, good fucking lord, my jaw is so TENSE.)

anyway god i just AGHHHH. idk sorry this is definitely not coherent at ALL because i’m tired and still need a bit more distance/time to process some of this. i guess here is one last thing i want to register before i sleep. i am in my 30s now and i am living a life that is so, so far removed from the social world i grew up in. marriage is not a norm among my friend group, almost all of my female friends are queer women, many women i know are not partnered and have no interest in being partnered, and the friends who are in heterosexual relationships tend to be in very gender-balanced relationships or slightly nontraditional relationships where it feels like both partners have engaged in conscious reflection about what they want their relationship to look/feel like. also i now date women, am out as a lesbian, and spend most of my time teaching/working with queer- and trans/nonbinary-identified kids.

so like, the world i live in now is just so different from the world i grew up in. and sometimes it is easy for me to kind of downplay the intensity of my own gender distress as a teen and young adult, or to sort of - act like it was a phase in my life that had much more to do with me than with the social environment i lived in. i don’t mean ‘phase’ in a dismissive ‘those feelings weren’t real’ kind way, but more like, ‘oh that was just part of the normal growing pains of figuring out who you are and what kind of person you want to be as an adult - everybody pretty much goes through some version of that.’ it’s true that everyone DOES go through some version of that, as just like, part of the process of individuation in that age range. but also like. idk man. being back in this environment - straight white women from the midwest and south, all engaging in the rituals of heterosexual white femininity - was just so intense and so MUCH, and it brought back a flood of feelings and visceral memories that i feel like i will need to spend some time sorting through over the next few weeks. like, what i experienced back then really WAS gender distress, and it was so, so distressing. i spent the years from age 11ish to 24ish existing with this constant lowgrade baseline feeling of wanting to claw my own fucking skin off because my own gendered body felt like such a prison, and i sometimes felt like i literally wanted to destroy my own body because i could not yet conceive of an alternative to inhabiting that body or playing the role that had been handed down to me. until i started reading queer memoirs and inhaling lesbian media and (especially) reading about queer femme identities, i literally did not have an image or any kind of felt sense of what another way of inhabiting my own body might look/feel like. i literally could not imagine it!!!

and that is why the distress feels so distressing, and becomes internalized in such violent ways, i think. because it’s the blind, mindless panic of a trapped and wounded animal. except that you lack any real understanding of the larger social forces at work, or any language with which to describe or conceptualize what social norms are or how they’re enforced. so in your mind, the only thing you can see wounding you is your own gendered body, or the way that gendered body is socially 'read’ by others. and that is why you want to claw your own fucking skin off, just literally dig your nails into your own flesh and claw it the fuck off. because you can’t see a norm, but you can see your gendered body, and you can see the ways that it causes other people to react to you, or treat you, or hold you to a certain set of expectations, and so in your mind you are like: this must be destroyed. in your mind you are like, the only way out is to get out of this fucking body, but that’s impossible, surely, you can’t get out of your own body, so you have to settle for starving it and self-harming it and ruthlessly punishing it in a thousand terrible ways, because you might not be able to leave your girl’s body behind, but you can make it suffer and pay for what it’s done to you. 

i am old enough now, and have spent enough time thinking and writing about those feelings, to identify them when they arise again, and to get the necessary distance from them so that i can say, what i want to destroy are the norms themselves, and the distress they cause, and not the body that has done nothing to me but be me. so i am not quite as sucked under as i used to be. but i think that there is something about the violence and intensity of those feelings that i forget sometimes, or misremember with age and distance. it’s easy to be a little bit patronizing to my younger self (or by extension to my younger students sometimes), because i now live in a social world that is largely arranged in ways that minimize rather than intensify or amplify gender distress. but when you have no choice in how to arrange your life, and no language with which to understand what is happening to you or what you are experiencing, and no frame of reference to help you understand that this is a period in your life and not forever, and no models you can look to in order to discover alternative ways of inhabiting your body or arranging your life... my god, that’s quite different from being an adult with a wide range of experiences and with much greater autonomy over your own body and life. anyway idk i need to keep thinking but now i must go to bed and try to sleep five hours before the plane.

[thediamondgirl17]

Alpha!Goshiki x Omega!Reader: That Day In The Gym (SFW-ish) Part 4

Oh. My. GOSH! I got so many notes, and so many comments for this part! So to all the Anons who wanted more posted! I got you! I would have tagged the person who suggested this ‘jealousy’ chapter, but they were Anon! I hope you see this! To all the others who want to be tagged, feel free to leave a comment or message me separately, I will be happy to tag you in it! If you also have ideas for this story or maybe a different one, feel free to leave a comment in my ask box! 

You may be asking, “Writer! Why is this SFW-ish! And not full SFW?” Well, my amazing readers, that is because I plan on making the end of this chapter a bit...steamy? I guess...Is that the word? I don’t know. However! If you WOULD like a NSFW chapter, I JUST might be able to make that happen for you! 

Another side note: I have been a bad writer...I LOST MY NOTES FOR THIS STORY! UGH! But- it’s okay! I made new ones! Some  information about the characters may change like ‘I thought this person was a Beta and their scent was this?’ Well it might have changed because of my lost notes, but bear with me here! I tried my best to remember! 

I think I’ve kept you all long enough! Here is Part 3 if you haven’t read that yet, and I hope you enjoy this chapter! 

    When the purpled haired Alpha dropped you back off at your dorm, your face was pink and chest filled with the butterfly feelings from your first kiss. He had bid you a goodnight before heading off to his own dorm before he was caught out after lights out. However, the both of you could hardly sleep soundly after what had happened. Both of your hearts were pounding loudly from it, and neither of your heads would let that moment leave them. 

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    When you had walked into practice the next day in the afternoon, your cheeks heated up a bit when Goshiki walked in. In response to that, the wing spiker’s own cheeks heated up and he felt himself become bashful in your presence. Of course the two of you would be shy, you HAD just started dating and all. A ball had rolled your way, and you reached down to grab it. You stood up and handed him the ball with a small blush, his hands brushed against yours as he touched it and both your faces got a little hotter at that. 

    “So you finally did it huh? Found yourself a cute little Omega!” Tendou cooed softly with a small smile. Both of you stiffened up a bit and gulped. 

    “W-we aren’t-,” 

    “H-he isn’t m-my-,” You both paused and looked at one another then gulped. 

    “W-well...she is...my...,” The wing spiker said softly and looked away from them. Tendou offered a small shit-eating smile 

    “Ya’ know coach won’t let you two be all lovey during practice...And you two are going to have to tell him~,” He teased. You shook your head all nervously. 

    “W-well w-we won’t...T-there is no reason to at the moment...,” You gulped and looked down. Goshiki nodded in agreement with your statement. If nothing changed, then why would they have to tell him about the two of you? 

    “Line up everyone.” Coach Washijo said sternly, causing the small personal side practices to pause and all of the players lined up. “You too Omega.” He spat. You tensed up. 

    “W-where do you want me to stand?” 

    “Just stand next to Ushijima for now.” He placed his hands behind his back and you stood next to the tall Apex Alpha next to you. The scent of fresh potting soil and mountain dew flooded your senses. It didn’t help either that your heat was only a few days away, so you got more affected by it than normal. 

    “Tomorrow we will be having a practice match with one of the college teams we played earlier in the season. Be ready for that, since this is a game I expect you to win even if it is only for practice or not.” He paused. “Omega, you will be keeping score.” He said as if it was the only thing you were good for. You nodded a bit and hummed in response. And after a while of him talking and scolding the team for this and that, he let everyone loose again to practice on their own. 

    “You’re gonna get to see me play for real tomorrow!” Goshiki said with a smile during his water break. You flushed and looked off to the side. 

    “You’re going to be great.” 

    “As the next future Ace of Shiratorizawa, I have to be great!” He said tilting his head up in a proud way. 

    “Well I think that you’re great...Next Ace or not...,” You said looking down at your fingers. 

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    The next afternoon had rolled around fairly quickly. However, this afternoon had proven to be a bit much for yourself alone. You had been setting up the gym, cleaning, getting uniforms ready, getting water ready, and much more. Nobody was allowed to help you due to the fact that they had to do more intense stretching and warm ups. Goshiki would watch you run back and forth along the gym to get everything ready, and he couldn’t help the small smile that crept up on his face when he watched you work so hard for the team. 

    You had just finished putting out waters for both teams, already filled when they had come in. It was a group of 11 boys, and what seemed to be no female manager. Your instincts had told you that they were all Betas and Omegas. 

    ‘Typical for a sports team...,’ You thought to yourself. You looked down at the ground as the team walked past you. You honestly couldn’t help it, it was instinct. 

    “Nice to see you again Coach Washijo...Thank you for having us.” The captain said with a bow to the coach. In suit others bowed and said their thanks as well. The old Coach just lifted his hand up to stop them. 

    “Thank you for coming to play us.” He said in his usual cold demeanor. “However, you said there would be one more of you as well as an Omega.” 

    “One of our team mates got his rut a little early,” The captain said standing up straight. “Our Omega is taking care of him.” 

    Almost on cue, you and Tendou looked at each other with a grossed out face. Not only did the captain just state that the teams Omega took care of their ruts, but also that this Omega belonged to all of them. Which was the complete opposite of respect. 

    “As they should.” Washijo nodded. Your face had heated up from embarrassment and shame. Why? You had no clue, but you gulped harshly and looked down. 

    “I think we should get this game started!” Tendou chimed in with his usual strange antics, however you had known that he had just wanted the topic changed due to the fact that you were both extremely uncomfortable with the situation. 

    “Omega.” Washijo said sternly. “Introduce yourself.” You stiffened up and stepped forward. 

    “H-hello! My name is (F/n) (L/n), I’m the manager of this team. I will be supplying water and towels during this game. Please let me know if you need something.” You said with a small bow. 

    “Oh I definitely need something from you Omega.” One of the teams members had said. You stood up straight and just looked away from him, disgusted. Goshiki walked over and placed his hand on your shoulder. 

    “She is part of our pack.” He warned and them with the simple phrase. 

    “Let’s get on with it.” Ushijima said and turned, heading to the end of the court to do the first bows before the game started. 

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    The game had started and Shiratorizawa won the first set by 5 points. Due to the fact that you were not able to be everywhere at once (Much to Washijo’s disappointment) the other coach changed the numbers while you got clean towels and full bottles of water for everyone. Every once in a while though you would pause a moment to watch the game. You were still fairly new to it, so you were still learning. However, even watching as a beginner, you watched the purple haired Alpha with admiration in your eyes. His own eyes would travel for a split second while he spiked the ball, over to you. And when he noticed you were watching, his straights were extra straight and powerful. Then when his feet would hit the floor and he would turn to you, you would turn away and blush. However, the other team had noticed this as well. 

    The ball had dropped to the opposing teams side and rolled past you while you were folding towels. You looked down at it and then looked behind you to see if it had come from there. 

    “Get that for us Omega.” The captain from the opposite team said. You stiffened up, hating the way he called you by your title instead of your name, as if you were worth less than him. You bent down and picked it up only to hear cat-calls and whistles when you had bent down. Now your own and Goshiki’s face had become red. Yours from embarrassment, and his own from anger. You picked up the ball and walked to the captain. You held out your arm and muttered something. “What was that?” The captain said with a smirk. 

    “I-I have a name...,” You said softly. 

    “Yeah. And you have a title.” 

    “I would prefer you use my name.” 

    “No.” He said. And you looked down at your feet and the floor and walked off the court. He was an Alpha, his word was final against yours. 

    “She said, to use her name.” Came a voice from the opposite side of the net. Goshiki. 

    “What’s it to you bowl cut?” The captain asked turning to face him. Both of them had been rotated up front so they were face to face at the net. 

    “Enough.” Ushijima said in a strong voice, one that made both of the Alphas look away from him on instinct. From that point on the game continued with a tense silence between the captain and first year wing spiker of Shiratorizawa. 

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    Once the game was over, you had found yourself relaxed a bit. Everyone had their towels and their drinks and should have been good...except...

    “Omega.” The captain said shaking is bottle in a rude way. “I want more.” You looked up at him and sighed, standing up you went over and took his bottle from him. This earned a slide glance from Goshiki. 

    “...I have a name...” You said softly and swiped the bottle from him. He then put his hand around your waist and smirked. 

    “And I told you that I don’t care...Now be a good little Omega or else I’ll have to teach you a lesson about respecting you Alphas.” He snarled. In an instant Goshiki found himself holding the guy’s wrist with his hand, leaving you enough room to wiggle out of his grip, which you did. 

    “Don’t touch her.” Goshiki said in a low tone. 

    “Oh yeah? And what are you gonna do about it bowl cut?” The captain smirked. This caught the attention of both teams and the coaches. 

    “Goshiki. Let go of him now.” Coach Washijo said sternly, however the Alpha didn’t listen and stared down the other Alpha in front of him. In a battle of titles, Washijo had no power. 

    “I’ll hurt you.” He warned and felt his jaw tighten as the purple haired boy held the guy’s wrist tighter. 

    “Bring it on-,” The captain began. However before he could finish you had cut in. You turned to face Goshiki and shoved your wrist under his nose where your scent glands were. Visibly everyone could see how his eyes went from intimidating and almost borderline feral, to calm and relaxed. He let go of the guy’s wrist and held your hand closer to his face, your scent covering his senses and he sighed softly at the smell. Both teams went on cleaning up after that, leaving the rest of the day to end in a tense silence. 

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    When Goshiki was walking the both of you back to the dorms. The same tense silence filled between you besides some of his commentary, which comprised of things such as: 

    “Some Alphas are assholes...,” 

    “Omegas shouldn’t be treated that way.” 

    “That guy gets under my skin.” You didn’t pay much mind to what he was saying until he stopped walking and looked at the ground. You paused a few steps ahead of him and looked behind yourself to see him staring at the ground. 

    “Tsutomu?” You asked softly. 

    “I-...I wanna scent you!” He said abruptly and looked up with pink cheeks, clenched fists, and a determined look on his face. Both the statement and his boldness had caused you yourself to blush violently under the small light on the side of the walkway back to the dorms. 

    “Th-thats s-so i-intimate th-though...,” You said softly. Suddenly, you felt him take a quick stride forward and held your hands in his. His were much larger than yours and enveloped them. 

    “B-but I want everyone to know your mine! W-well n-not mine a-as in I see you like your just an object-! B-but mine as in...Nobody else can have you...,” His voice slowly trailed off as he went on. “A-and my dorm mate is out and won’t be back for two days! He went to visit family! S-So we can do it in my dorm!” 

    “I-its past lights out...,” You said softly. 

    “(Y/n)?...S-stop deflecting the suggestion...,” He said looking down into your eyes. 

    “...Y-yeah...L-lets do it-” You started, but before you could finish you felt the purple haired boy quickly drag you along to his dorm room. And you had suddenly realized, you had never been inside Goshiki’s dorm room before. 

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    When the two of you had finally got to the dorm, you knew it was going to smell like him, but you didn’t know it would be the thing that fully enveloped your senses. You stepped inside and you smelled nothing but warm lavender and it made you close your eyes and hum. In return this caused the purple haired boy to blush and pull you further into his room. 

    He sat you down on his bed and closed the window curtains and locked the doors to his dorm. The two of you had remained in your school uniforms due to the fact that you had both just gotten out of practice and changed into non-sweaty clothing. He gulped, and pink dusted his cheeks as he climbed into his bed with you. In return your felt your own cheeks get hot. Goshiki had laid down on his back with his back against the wall, in a sitting-upright position. Then he pulled you on top of him with your chests pushed together and burried his face in the crook of your neck. Slowly he took a deep inhale of your scent while he dragged his wrists along your sides. 

    “So beautiful...,” He cooed softly into your neck. “Y-your so pretty...And your scent is so nice...I could drown in it...,” He cooed and kept dragging his wrists along you. You gulped from embarrassment and lifted your hands up to him and gently slid them along his neck and shoulders, which were the only areas you currently had access to. 

    And for a while it had gone just like that. Small kisses on scent glands, hands dragging down each other in an intimate and passionate way. Sweet nothings were whispered to one another, and deep kisses were also not a rare thing either. The actions made both your hearts flutter in sync and left the both of you drowning in a sweet mixture of warm lavender and your own scent. It was only when his hands reached down and gripped your hips to pull you closer to him, that you felt yourself snap. Your pupils had dilated and you were softly panting. Goshiki had noticed the sudden change in your demeanor and looked down at you. 

    “A-are you okay?” He asked. However it took you a moment to respond. 

    “...My heat...,” You panted out. “...Came early...,” 

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Taglist: @officialfictionalwreck @stanwallpapers @kyrah-williams @samwise-though @steggy4ever 

If you want to be added to the tag list just let me know and I will happily do that! 

[dzpenumbra]

4/11/23

Ugh, I'm feelin kinda crappy. Headache. Kinda been warm all day, peeing a lot. Usually all adds up to being a bit under the weather. Hoping I'm not. I have no idea how I could get sick, I have left my apartment like one damn time in the past 2 weeks!

People downstairs and I think the chick upstairs were coughing throughout the day, so maybe that's why I've got sickness on my mind. I'm probably just exhausted.

I did a really intense yoga routine, it had me sweating. It was good, very worth the effort. Maybe that's why I'm a bit run down.

Also, sleep was not great. But I thought I had caught up? I guess not, I'm absolutely wiped right now. Like actually nodding off.

So... I want to capitalize on my early tiredness. I'll sum up the day very quickly.

I refilled the birdfeeder and the Nuthatch came back and was eating all day, it was nice. I hope the people coming to inspect the apartment in about a week aren't going to be dicks about the birdfeeder, it's really nice to have nature in my life again. I played Ad Aspera again, I like the story. I kinda wish they had like... story mode and then just... simulator mode where you just terraform the planet. That's the big reason why I'm there, I just want a realistic terraforming simulator, that was the big reason it drew me in. The story is a nice bonus, but in some ways its a bit distracting. But again, it works.

The rest of the day was chinese leftovers and recording music. I deleted everything I had yesterday and started from scratch. And I finished it... kinda. I got 4 guitar tracks - 2 clean, 2 distorted. All the guitar is done. About 12 minutes of it. It was a lot for one day! Especially considering I was just making it all up on the spot. Tomorrow will be bass and programming drums. Then maybe some strings or something with it, idk, we'll see.

And... that was literally the entire day. I did music for like... for a really long time. Like 5-6 hours straight? I don't even really remember honestly. Music just makes me tunnel-vision and trance out, I swear, every time.

It's really cool to see this project take form. It's such a big undertaking to do solo, but it's coming together! Again, this is for the desire path project, so... so far... walking the paths is done, mapping the paths is done, animating the paths is done (just need to export a few versions when it's time for editing), voiceover script is done, voiceover recording is done, now the foundation for the music is done, just need to finalize the music... then export all the audio... and then go into Blender and start the video editing. There, I have the path animations and some in-game footage from Minecraft. And... no idea what to do for the rest of it... XD I was thinking of going to a nearby college and filming a desire path in the wild out there... and going to a nearby national park and filming a trail walk. I just need to catch a "I'm cool going out into the world" day. It's been a while since I've had one of those.

I guess the hoodie is going on hold for now... this is the nature of my workflow, every time! Just hopping between whichever project is letting my creativity flow naturally at the time.

But I'm legit nodding off so I'm heading to bed. Zzzzzz

[havethetimeofyourstyles]

Breathe Me In, Breathe Me Out

3028 words of pure smut and filth. You’ve been warned hehe.

also yes, there is an idea that I got from a tweet. If you know then you know.

*gif not mine*

It was a nice warm day with the sun shining. The sky was blue as the rays of the sun radiated onto your back as it was nearing the end of June.

You felt warm as you were bent over with barely any clothes on, just a tiny bikini as you could feel your legs and back could give out any second with how you were positioned. You’ve been out here for a while; an hour or two, not knowing if you could do any more. But you wanted to finish, needed to finish. You felt eyes boring into you that felt hotter than the sun, making you feel even warmer. You rolled your head, stretching out your neck, moaning at the feeling, until…

“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” You whined out.

“You alright, baby?” Harry asked from the pool chair he was lounging on with a plate of fruit on the table right next to him.

“Got cut by another thorn again.” You put down the hand shovel that was meant for gardening.

You were gardening… in the summer. And it was hot. You opted for a bikini because you’d figured you’d want to rip your clothes off anyways with how hot it is. And you could probably use some good ole vitamin D.

Along with another kind of D, but you’ll get to that later.

“Careful, love. You’ve been doing that for a while now. Why don’t you finish it up tomorrow? The sun is about to go down.” You nod, agreeing that it was time to wrap it up. You turn on the hose that was on the side to rinse your hands and you dry them on a towel. Harry sneaks up on you, causing you to squeal in surprise as he wraps his arms around your bare stomach.

“Look at you in this.” He plays with the strings on your bikini and then runs his hands up and down the side of your thighs. He kisses your shoulder from the outside, in, and all the way up to your neck. You move your head to the side giving him more access to nimble onto your skin. You let out a moan when you feel Harry’s hands go up your stomach and onto your breasts, massaging it over your bikini top. “Let’s play, baby.” You can practically feel him smirking into your neck, and you turn around in his arms, giving him a lustful kiss.

He moans against your lips and it’s a sound you always want to hear from him. You wrap your arms around his neck and play with the ends of his hair, feeling so good in his arms. Harry’s hands go straight to your hips that will later run down to your ass, giving the soft flesh a squeeze.

You can feel his hard on against your pubic bone as he moves around a little bit for some friction and you can take him right there, but you stop and pull away before anything happens.

“Wait,” you pull away from his lips and he groans in frustration like a little boy.

“Why’d your stop?” He pouts and you’re quick to kiss his lips so he can stop pouting.

“Let me just rinse off, okay? I’ve been in the sun and dirt for two hours. I just want to wash up and feel fresh before you know…”

“Before…what?” He teases, knowing exactly what’s going to happen. You give him a look and he chuckles.

“Before you eat me out and possibly fuck me.” You answer him back confidently. Harry’s smirk vanished from his face and his eyes scream ‘fuck me’ entirely.

“10 minutes. Give me 10 minutes and then you’ll have me.” You pull away from his hold and start walking away, but he still has his hand wrapped around your wrist.

“Make it 5!” You roll your eyes, bring your lips to his ear.

“Wanna make my pussy feel pretty for you, but I won't enjoy it if I don’t feel good and clean. And I can’t do that when you’ve got your hand around my wrist, can I?” Harry looks down and lets go immediately.

“Hurry back.” He says as you start walking to the inside of the house.

“Always!”

10 minutes felt like an eternity to Harry. It takes everything in him to not cup himself over his swim trunks to relieve some sort of pressure because he knows that once he does that, he wouldn’t want to stop. Besides, he wants you to do it. He wants you to suck him so good that-

He hears the sliding door close and he looks up to see you walking towards him. You were wearing a bikini that was different than earlier and he swears he can cum in his pants immediately. You give him that sweet look as you walk towards him and he just wants to fuck the innocence you’re trying to portray out of your eyes.

“Lonely?” You tease as you’re back once again in his hold.

“Always when you’re not around.”

“Flirt.”

“Only with you.” You roll your eyes playfully.

“Well maybe I can keep you company.” You gently push him down so he’s lying on the pool chair that is reclined flat. He puts his hands behind his head as he looks up at you. You turn around so your back is facing him, and he sees your arms reach behind you to pull the strings that hold up your bikini and your boobs. You untie the neck string as well and slip it off, throwing it to the side. You turn your head back around without fully turning around and you see Harry practically drooling over your naked back, waiting for you to turn around and see your beautiful bare chest. You bite your lip and wink at him, giggling a little bit. You cross your arms as your hugging yourself and covering your breasts, and you then turn around.

“Oh, c’mon! Let me see you, baby.” You laugh at his frustration and you look down to see the tent that is very noticeable in his pants.

“No.”

“Please! I’m hurtin’ here.” He pouts and puts out his best puppy down eyes. You roll your eyes, giving in.

“Ugh, fine!” You grunt jokingly, giving in.

You turn back around and uncross your arms to play with your long hair, tossing it to the side and back. You’re hands run up and down your body, making it very obvious that you’re touching your boobs. Once you hear nothing from Harry, you turn back around, and face him, and see his jaw wide open.

“Fuck, you’re so beautiful.” You let out a giggle and get in between his legs on the chair.

He lifts his hips up and you slide his swim trunks down causing his dick to slap against his stomach right between his fern tattoos, one of your favorite out of many.

“Damn, baby. You’re so hard.” You say seductively, biting your lip to control yourself to not devour him instantly.

“All for you, angel. Had to look at you in that tight little bikini for two hours while you were bent over gardening, nearly bust my pants.” You smirk, knowing you had an effect on him.

“Gonna suck my cock now?”

“Gonna beg for it?”

“Don’t do this.” He says in a consequenting voice that means ‘if we do this, you’re in for it.’ You know that tone all too familiar where you would spend the night sleepless as Harry was fucking you into the mattress, demanding you to not cum. It was a moment that made you feel so frustrated, but once you finally came, it was intense and hard.

“Only because I love you.” He raises his eyebrows at your words.

“Mhm… only because you wanna cum tonight.” You roll your eyes and grab ahold of him. You spit on the tip a little for a more easier slide against your hand.

“Y’know, I can make you not cum either.” You pout as you continue working your hand against him.

“Seeing as you’re grinding yourself against my leg, we both want to cum, so cut the shit, baby.” He chuckles when you look down and get off his leg, so you’re back in between them to lie on your stomach comfortably. You didn’t even realize you were moving against him, but the thought made you laugh.

You finally bend down and lick him from the base to the tip, causing Harry to let out a ‘mmm.’ You slowly lick around his tip, in which Harry impatiently lifted his hips so he can finally be in your mouth, so you finally take him in your mouth and he’s in heaven. You move your head up and down, taking in more and more of his length.

“Your mouth is so good.” He says as he throws his head back and rests his forearm on his forehead.

You massage his balls as you work your mouth on him. Harry moans, making you moan against him as you look at him and he feels the vibrations from your mouth to his dick.

You take your eyes off him and focus on getting him all the way in your mouth so you can feel him in your throat. You take him a little more than halfway, trying to get your nose to touch his pubic bone. In fact, you’re way too focused that you don’t hear the rustling of the leaves that are right next to you both. Harry looks down at you, leaning on one arm, and puts a single flower in your hair that lays behind your ear, causing you to look up at him. He smiles at the sight of this picture perfect moment of a flower that you planted that’s in your hair with his cock in your mouth; a sight he will never lose in his memory.

“So pretty while you’re sucking me, angel. So beautiful.” He takes his hands and places them both on your face as you continue to bob your head, never stopping; practically breathing him in. He then makes you stop by firmly stopping your head from going back down and turns your head to the side so his tip goes straight to your cheek, seeing the outline of it poking through. Once Harry sees his cock against your cheek, he caresses the skin and pats it lightly, making you moan as your mouth is so full. “Keeping me nice and warm, my love. Feels so good.” You let out a ‘mhm’ and turn your head back so you can continue sucking him as he plays with your hair lightly.

Harry is so close, but he wants to feel you around him. He wants to feel your slick walls that keep him wet. He wants to feel it all.

“Fuck, come here, baby.” Harry groans and you shake your head. You know he wants to make you feel good now, but you’re enjoying this just as much as he is. “Wanna lick you.” You squeeze your legs together, but you already know you’re dripping for him.

“Want you to cum in my mouth and then you can, okay?” You say as you look up at him. He takes a deep sigh and nods.

He tightens his fists around your hair, letting you know that he’s almost to combust. You play with his balls, stimulating his arousal as you jerk him. Harry is a moaning mess as he lets out a string of curse words under his breath, making you clench your thighs together.

Once Harry’s moans get slightly louder, your lips quickly go back around his tip so you can feel every drop of his orgasm inside your mouth, and not letting a sliver of it go to waste. His hips buck up involuntarily into your mouth, riding his orgasm out as he lets out a deep and raspy groan, feeling his cum being shot up inside your throat. When Harry’s done, he relaxes and lifts his head to look up at you, cleaning your lips of the little cum that has left your mouth, but you’re quick to retrieve it and swallow it all. Your eyes meet Harry’s, and you open your mouth and stick out your tongue, letting him know and see that his cum is all gone. He smirks and brings his hands out, telling you to come to him.

You crawl on top of him carefully as you’re afraid the pool chair might break on you any second. Harry smiles at you and you bite your lip, bring you for a passionate kiss.

“Mmm… good girl.” His tongue slips into your mouth and he tastes himself on your tongue, but he doesn’t care; all he wants is to taste you now. “Gonna be an angel and let me lick you up now?” You’re caught off guard by his question as you’re still dazy from his lips. Harry kisses your cheek to your jaw and to your neck, waiting for your answer, and you’re too caught up in his kisses until he bites your shoulder, leaving a mark on you.

“Want your mouth on me.” You manage to get out.

“Yeah? Want to feel my tongue in you so you can cum?” You look at him with big pouty eyes and nod your head. And with that, Harry carefully flips you so you’re on your back and he’s in between your legs like the position you were before.

He kisses down your chest, making sure to lick and suck your nipples that have been very hard, considering it’s not that chilly out. He then continues down your bare and soft stomach, lightly squeezing the flesh that he loves holding and pinching.

He’s finally at the hem of your bottoms and kisses along the hem of it, and then pulls it down fully without taking his lips off your skin.

Harry looks up at you and you’re smiling with your eyes closed from the little kisses, and he’s sure you’re imagining him with his mouth all over you.

He finally touches your core with two fingers, feeling up and down, and you flinch but moan at the feeling of it.

“Haven’t done anything to you and you’re drenched, baby.” He smirks and looks at you. Your eyes are still closed and you breath out a laugh.

“Mmm… don’t have to. Y-You make me feel good in general.” Harry blushes and kisses your inner thigh, and you’re waiting for him to move closer.

Harry takes one last glance at your dripping heat, and he finally licks from your hole to your clit. He then focuses on your clit, breathing in and out your scent through his nose. He flicks the tip of his tongue quick on your clit, making you moan loudly; sure the neighbors will hear as your house is on top of the hill and the next house is about a mile away.

“You like that, baby?” He looks up at you and you’re running your hands up and down your body, playing and giving your breasts a squeeze. Harry finds himself grinding against the chair at the sight of you playing with yourself.

“Mhm. Love it. You always make me feel so good—always make my pussy feel so good.” He continues licking you as he adds two fingers into your dripping hole, thrusting them in and out as he licks your clit.

Harry doesn’t notice you grab the same flower from the plants on the side and you place it behind his ear, the same he did for you.

“My pretty boy.” You scrap the side of his scalp and he smiles at you and Harry feels like he could cry any second with how much love he has for you. You never fail to make him blush, but he continues licking you up; showing you how much he loves you.

“Don’t know if I could go without tasting you. You fucking taste like sugar, baby.” You feel his fingers curl up, massaging the soft area inside your pussy, and you grab a hold of his curly hair. The pull is hard, but Harry doesn’t mind you pulling. He always loves having your hands in his hair as he’s pleasing you.

“Suck on me, baby. Please.” You whimper out. Harry takes your clit into his mouth, his fingers still inside of you and still doing its job, and he licks and sucks on it. He pulls it a bit, giving it a little teeth, but not too hard. “Oh, fuck. Gonna cum, H.”

Harry pulls back, and takes his other hand and puts it right on top of your stomach above your pubic bone. “Yeah? You feel it right here?” He pats there area. “You feel it in your belly?” You give him a ‘mhm’ and start grinding your hips up as he continues fingering you. “Give it to me, baby. I want it.”

And with that you’re taken into another dimension as you cum onto his fingers with a loud moan, chanting his name from the lips that was once on Harry. He sucks on your nipples as he continues thrusting his fingers into you, riding and calming your orgasm out.

You feel Harry remove his fingers, bends down, and lick you clean. You shake a bit as you’re still so sensitive, and he mentions how you’re practically dripping, but he’s quick to stick his tongue in you to lick up all your juices.

“All those strawberries you’ve been eating. Tastes lovely.” You open your eyes and look down at him as you giggle.

You look up and see the sun being in the middle of setting as it turns into a beautiful golden sky as you're coming down from your high. He hovers over you and bends down, giving you a kiss. You wrap your arms around his neck, shifting over, and bring him next to you so he can lie down.

With matching flowers in your both’s hair, you cuddle each other on the pool chair, post high, as you feed each other strawberries on a lovely summer evening you won’t forget.

feedback and talk to me here!

[d0llpie]

Tendou x reader

 Part 1    Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5

Warnings: angst, mentions of insecurity, self harm (not explicit), sexual assault, ooc ushijima and smut, please let me know if i missed anything

Word count: 2.7k

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You woke up and took a shower, as you were getting ready you decided to text Asahi to let him know what you were up to

y/n: Hey Asahi, i'm going out for brunch with a friend, hope you had a good practice and tell the team i said hello :)

Asahi: Who's the friend? Do you have enough money? I can pick you up later if you need

y/n: it's Tendou, the red head we saw on moving day, he's on the boys Volleyball team, it's okay :)

Asahi: Text me after and keep your location on

y/n: i will, love you <3

Asahi: i love you too <3

You put on a black tennis skirt, white collared tee and an oversized navy blue sweater on top. You put on some simple jewellery and make up before tying your (h/l) (h/c) in a half up half down style. After checking yourself in the mirror you wondered if you were too dressed up. You heard a knock on your door which brought you out of your thoughts and you opened to see Tendou. He was wearing black dress pants, a striped long tee with a thin collared jacket and some rings on his hands. His hands. You noticed his defined hands and how attractive they looked decorated with rings.

"N/n-chan.." he pulled you out of your thoughts while he looked you up and down blushing

"Ten-chan, you look great! I thought i might've been dressed up but it seems we have similar style" you smiled sweetly at him, feeling your heart beating faster than usual.

"You look great too, shall we head out?" he smirked grabbing the door handle behind you and closing your dorm door.

The walk to the cafe earned you both many stares as people in the streets gawked at you both who seemed caught up in your own world.

Tendous POV

This was going to be harder than expected, he felt so carefree around you and he wanted to push his doubts away and trust you just wanted to be with him, friend or more, just him. But deep down he doubted you and he hated that he did. You were holding his arm walking, talking mindlessly about different topics, he watched as you rambled on and he felt comfortable being the less energetic friend for once. You matched his energy and for now he was satisfied seeing you be the ball of energy.

"Would you get any piercings ten-chan?" he snapped out of his thoughts and looked down at you who was still clinging to his arm.

"Oh i have my ears pierced i just haven't worn them in a while, see?" he showed the 3 holes in his earlobe and y/n looked up at him surprised with a smile.

"Woah, you should've worn them today" she looked up at him and he searched her eyes for any tell that she was joking, any sign that would give him an excuse to push her away, he found none. They arrived at the cafe and sat in a small booth by the window, the sun catching y/n's hair and making it seem to glow. Tendou looked in adoration as she read the menu, why did you have to be so cute, he was still prepared, prepared to hear you say it, to say that you weren't interested in him and wondered if Ushijima was single. He'd heard it all before and was no longer shocked at the lengths girls had gone to in order to try get with the captain.

"I'll have the french toast and fruit salad please" he looked up at you and realised he hadn't even read the menu yet.

"Uh me too, thank you" he said to the waitress before handing over the menu. He heard y/n chuckle from across the table and shot her a teasing glare.

You watched as Tendou seemed to zone out while staring at you, you wanted to know what he was thinking, after all, being the only two in your dorm building would be difficult if you weren't friends.

"Tendou, are you alright?" you asked sweetly

"I'm great n/n-chan, are you?" he looked relaxed but his eyes gave away that he was avoiding something, he wouldn't even look directly at you

"Sorry if i'm wrong, but i've noticed you tense up a lot and zone out, are you sure you want to hang out with me?" He looked into her eyes and once again saw nothing but sincerity, he was so worried about her using him he had barely spoken to her all day, he hadn't even been trying to consciously push her away but it had become habit. He felt awful

"What? You're amazing i'm just, i guess i was wondering why you wanted to be friends with me" he started twirling the rings on his fingers

"Oh c'mon don't doubt yourself, you're so nice and always take me to practice, plus you're the first friend i've made at this school and your style matches mine, it was just made to be" you said dramatically, looking at the ceiling. He laughed and felt his worry release.

Back at the dorms you asked Tendou what he liked to do and he started talking to you about Shounen Jump, he seemed so excited and you wanted to share that with him

"Could i maybe borrow yours and read it?" you asked

"Yes i'll go get it right now!" his face lit up and he ran off to his dorm room, after a few minutes he ran back and handed it to you, you laughed at his excitement.

"You're beautiful you know that?" he said staring down at you, you blushed and looked up at him not knowing how to respond, before you could he went back to his dorm with a smirk on his face.

y/n: Asahi i'm back at the dorms

Asahi: are you okay? how was brunch?

y/n: it started off a little rocky but it was really fun :)

Asahi: that's great, do you want me to come visit you tomorrow?

y/n: if you're free that'd be cool, i have a question tho

Asahi: what's up?

y/n: back at the dorms Tendou called me beautiful and then just walked away..

Asahi: you cannot get a boyfriend after a week of school y/n

y/n: i never said anything like that

Asahi: introduce me to him tomorrow okay?

y/n: ugh okay, bye <3

Asahi: goodbye <3

You changed into some shorts and top before lying in bed and reading shounen jump. You heard knocking on your door but you snuggled deeper into your bed. You don't remember falling asleep but you remember you were almost finished shounen jump at some ungodly hour in the morning. Asahi was knocking on your door and calling out to you

"y/n open the door" he groaned as he'd been waiting for 10 minutes now

Tendou had woken up to the banging down the hallway and looked out to see Asahi outside your door. He made eye contact with the male and started to worry as he walked towards him, he assumed this was your brother but he seemed frustrated.

"Hi..um Tendou? is it?" he rubbed the back of his neck as he spoke to the redhead

"Yep, you're y/n's brother right? the ace?" Asahi looked up at him and smiled,

"Haha yeah i guess, is y/n in her dorm?" he asked

"Yeah she should be" Tendou said before walking towards your dorm with Asahi following. He knocked on the door and heard some shuffling before y/n opened the door.

"Asahi can you relax i'm coming-" you looked up and saw Tendou and blushed before you saw Asahi behind him

"Oh sorry, um, come in" you moved out of the way and they both walked in, Asahi watched tendou before he wrapped you in a bear hug, suffocating you.

"Asahi- let go" you squirmed and laughed as he put you down. Tendou was sitting by your desk holding his shounenjump manga and watching you, he saw how cute you looked in your pyjamas and he smirked, admiring you.

"N/n-chan, did you start reading it yet?" he said snapping you and Asahi out of your greetings.

"I actually finished it last night, that's why i was still asleep this morning" you smiled at him blushing, Asahi noticed.

"n/n-chan?" Asahi looked between you and Tendou.

You both just laughed and Tendou was smiling like crazy, ushiwaka had never read shounen jump and he never had anyone to discuss it with.

Tendou left and you and Asahi started talking

"so y/n, that's Tendou" he started the conversation

"yep, do you like him?" you asked nervously

"well do you?" he suggestively asked, you slapped his arm and rolled your eyes

"We're just friends Asahi, don't worry" you rolled your eyes at him

"But about what i said, he called me beautiful...what do you think he meant?" you looked up at Asahi

"I think he likes you, please get to know him more though, i barely even know him" Asahi sounded protective but you knew he was a big softie that would support you no matter what.

"Thanks Asahi" you smiled

After Asahi left you caught up on some homework, watching more anime than working and took a shower.

Over the next few weeks Tendou let you borrow his Jump magazines and you discussed them when going to and from practice. One of his practice matches was coming up and he invited you to come watch him play, you accepted of course.

At training he would always put his arm around you when talking to his teammates and Semi, the setter, seemed to find it amusing how smug he acted around them. You didn't mind, you enjoyed talking to the boys team and you noticed when tendou would tense up at the interactions you and Ushijima shared. You brushed it off and tried to avoid making Tendou uncomfortable.

At the practice match against some college team you sat with the girls volleyball club, next to Miki the captain and Yachi the setter. You stopped chatting when you noticed the boys team walk in, Tendou looked so laid back especially in comparison to Ushijima who looked more serious than usual, something you thought was impossible. Tendou looked up at you and dramatically waved while smiling, you laughed at him and waved back being just as dramatic. Yachi elbowed you lightly and raised her eyebrow suggestively, you rolled your eyes in return.

You watched as Tendous face changed when he made eye contact with the players in front of him, he was filled with so much intensity and he really did suit the name guess monster. Every spike he went to block he ended up killing it, he was insane. You smiled at him in amazement and he glanced up to see you looking at him from the stands, his heart fluttered and he stared back more demonic looking than ever.

They won both sets easily and as the game ended you ran down to the gym entrance ready to congratulate the team, particularly Tendou. You looked around for the tall redhead as Shirabu and Goshiki walked past, you smiled at them and gave them small congratulations as well as the rest of the team.

Finally Tendou began to approach you with Ushijima and you ran up to him and wrapped your arms around his neck giving him a hug and mumbling congratulations into his chest.

You stepped back after realising how long you'd been hugging him in front of the doorway and you looked up to see him blushing.

'cute' you thought.

"Thanks n/n-chan" he said and you smiled at Ushijima congratulating him too, he smiled back at you earning a shocked look from both you and Tendou.

You waited outside for Tendou to get changed and finish up with team, after he did you walked back towards the dorms. He noticed you started to shiver and he grabbed your hand, enveloping your smaller one in his much larger one. You looked up at him and grabbed his arm, cuddling into his side with your head resting on his shoulder as you walked. Both of you lightly blushing and enjoying each other's company.

"Y/n, do you wanna go out with me this weekend?" Tendou asked squeezing your hand lightly

"Yeah sure where do you wanna go?" you replied obviously not realising what he meant. You both hung out together often and went to the cafe down the road several times a week, but Tendou wanted to take you on a date.

"I was thinking dinner in Tokyo, there's a nice restaurant near my mums work, i've been there before and the prices aren't too bad" he hand subconsciously brought his hands into his jacket pockets, bringing yours with his, you blushed at the gesture.

"Wow Tokyo, that's fancy, are you gonna propose?" you beamed at him dramatically while giggling. He smirked at you and you answered 'yes of course' and you arrived at the dorms a few minutes later.

"Well goodnight n/n-chan thank you for coming to the game" he took his hands out his pockets and noticed he was still holding yours.

"Of course, you really were incredible out there" you said and hugged him again. You felt him tense up against you and you pulled back not wanting to make him uncomfortable but his hands snaked around your waist and pulled you back in as he held your head. You wrapped your arms around him and smiled into his chest.

"Goodnight ten-chan" you looked up at him before walking back to your dorm room feeling excited for your date in the city. A date. You hadn't confirmed if it was a date or not, you didn't want to assume so you decided to text him after your shower.

y/n: Hey Tendou

Tendou: Already miss me?

y/n: shut up

Tendou: hahaha whats up?

y/n: so this weekend..is it a date?

Tendou: Do you want it to be?

y/n: Do you have you answer everything with a question :(

Tendou: Alright, lets call it a date :)

y/n: okay :)), also i finished your other shounen jump can i borrow the next one pleaaseee <3

Tendou: Of course n/n-chan, i can bring it over now if you're too impatient to wait ;)

y/n: >:(

Tendou: i'm kidding i'll bring it to you now :)

Not long after their conversation y/n heard a knock on her door and she opened it excitedly and invited Tendou inside. He stood awkwardly by her desk while she grabbed his last copy

"Tendou.." you looked at him with a scared expression and he began to worry

"please tell me he isn't dead" you looked up at him dramatically while gripping his weekly jump copy. He relaxed and began to laugh at you, he'd never had anyone to discuss his interests with besides volleyball, and with you he could discuss both freely.

"You'll have to find out-" he was cut off by your snatching the next copy out of his hands and running to your bed, he giggled and began to leave when you looked up at him

"Don't you wanna see if he dies?" you knew he knew the outcome but you wanted to talk to him about it and he knew this too, he turned around and hesitantly sat on ur bed and watched you read.

After a while Tendou was sitting against your headboard and you were in between his legs with your back to his chest reading the manga. He was following along the storyline occasionally and playing with your hair absentmindedly. It was around 3am when he noticed you slump further down, you had fallen asleep.

He watched for a while as you slept in his arms, your chest rising a falling peacefully, he knew he should head back to his room so you wouldn't be startled when you woke up so he lay you down under the covers and grabbed the manga from your hand placing it next to your bed. He pressed a small kiss to the top of your head before returning to his room and falling asleep.