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#ugh and the fic came out SOOOOO good
swervesbar · 1 year
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Uh oh... Better clean up your act, Inferno. 🧼🦖💢🐜💦
I was paired with the delightful @ivycorp for tf big bang 2023! Please go shower them with love, their writing is SOOOO good 💖
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inf3ct3dd · 1 year
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ellie headcanons pt 4.!
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warnings: literally nothing
content: loser!ellie x reader
authors note: brewing a full length fic in my mind rn… this might be the last hc post 😓!!!
pt.3. taglist!
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- loves matching with you. keychains, shoes, outfits, literally anything. if you have dyed hair, she’d dye a piece of hers to match you.
- makes up elaborate plots to kiss you bc she’s too cool and nonchalant to ask for a kiss 😕😕
“ugh, my lips are just sooooo dry…”
“didnt you literally just put chapstick on 5 minutes ago?”
“yknow chapstick these days…so…low quality.”
“is this your weird way of asking me to kiss you?”
“noooo what!!! thats craaaaazy i have nooo idea what you’re talking about!!!”
smooch
“you’re so stupid.”
“i feel sooooo moisturized right now”
- always fidgeting with something. probably has a rubix cube keychain 😕🔥🔥
- speaking of, she has an excessive amount of keychains. like so many.
- covers her eyes and peaks through her fingers every time you change infront of her
- definitely audibly said “woah” when she saw ur boobs for the first time
- has so many dumb socks. dinosaurs, minecraft, pickles, literally anything she likes she has a pair of socks for
- scarily good at roblox obbies. you literally can’t play with her because she’ll be done in like 5 minutes 😞
- loves those papas cooking games. her faves are the taco mia one and the sushi-ria
- arizona green tea 🗣️🗣️
- will put on awful accents for hours on end just for fun 😞 esp the italian accent. it’s ridiculous 💔💔 or that frat dude accent
“suhhh dude”
- definitely built her own pc. put a picture of you in it too ☹️☹️
- calls you “dude” or “bro” on accident sometimes
- absolutely constantly argues w ppl on the internet. if she gets bored she just tells them to kts and blocks them 😕
- MAKES THE BEST PASTA EVER!!! it’s literally her favorite food and she’s constantly cooking it. even makes her own sauce 🔥🔥
- tries to do tricks while she’s smoking and just ends up a coughing mess
- her default pose in every picture is just her doing a thumbs up and looking at the camera like this 😐 but whenever she takes a picture with you she is absolutely CHEESING
- randomly takes 0.5 pictures of you constantly. has a whole album in her phone of all the pictures
- barely ever uses instagram, and all her posts are just pictures of you.
- “i could take a bear in a fight.”
- loves balancing things on your head when you fall asleep around her. one time you woke up to like 20 cheerios falling on your lap
- whenever she’s home alone she puts on insanely random outfits and then forgets she’s wearing them. one time you came home to her sleeping on the couch in a full suit
- lets you stand on the cart in the grocery store so she can stand behind you and push it around
- has had the same backpack since the 5th grade. she’s had to sow it back together 20 times and she refuses to throw it away because its “special”
- stalks all your reposts on tiktok when she’s bored
“was this about me???”
- absolutely disgusted by like…any type of canned food. she will not go near it. ESPECIALLY SARDINES
- makes a million typos every time she texts you. her messages are like ancient scrolls you have to decipher to read
“sre tou comungw over todqy ??”
- every time she wears a hat she wears it backwards
- hates sharing her food, but will constantly eat yours
“just a little bite!!!” and she eats like half of it 😒
- has the julien baker rainbow guitar strap
- literally loves apples. so much. apple juice, apple pie, apple cider, literally ANYTHING that has apples in it/ is apple flavored she will DEVOUR IT
- whenever she cooks for herself, she just eats it straight out of the pot/pan.
“whats the point?? ‘s just more dishes to wash 😒”
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taglist: if ur name is crossed, i cant tag u :((
@princessguardian444 @mina-281 @leatheredhearts @r3wbeef @dinaissoprettyoml @forelliesposts @lov3lylotus @melissabarrerass @greencacty @as2rid @kingofmylastkiss @dollietes @ellieslilsIvvt @pl9ys @bbygrlshelbs @gayh0rr0r @sawaagyapong @paran0id0blivi0n @bubs-world @mag-mfm @bearieio @slutshies @horror-whoree @calystas-morning-tea @ilovaffles @fr3sh-tragedies @iloveeyousblog @maris-koffin @emonopolyman @elliesgflol @girlwonderchloe @brunettedolls-blog @beestar120 @ddreabea @ibloom4u @elliesmellsbad @thecowardwrites @owmoiralover @yuyans-stuff @minixmel @ellesslutt @swtsuna @saggykneecaps @4rt3m1ss @clouded-whispers @baldph0bic @elleatethat @certifedcrybunny @staxz8 @astridnyx31 @0rb1t-s4turn @amandla111 @kalia31 @spinnyshark @cewcumbers @urnewghostfriend @dinasmoon @teeveegirl @iwantsoda @lunascerebro @matildalee @rach-0000 @er-or101 @our-horse @armins1ut @syrenada @seventeenelliesgf @jellysangelstar @f3r4lfr0gg3r @ilovelyby @people0know @sapphicsstars @hi2647 @mousymaven @echostinn @bratydoll
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syuga-s · 5 months
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who do you blame?
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w.c. 11.9k pairing. Yoongi x fem!reader, Taehyung x fem!reader genre. hello again ANGST, slight smut, romance a/n. NSFW MDNI !!! curse words, alcohol, sexual content (just fingering this time),, i may or may not have a second part to this fic 😼 ENJOY pookies <3
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Don’t know if I can call it insomnia if I literally sleep at this hour all the time.
I want to dye my hair black again.
But this restlessness feels different.
Maybe that third cup of coffee’s doing its thing.
I was so close to having a panic attack; I did cry, though. And I still want to for a variety of reasons.
I’ve been thinking about a lot of things this week. I really want to see Yoongi like, right now. That’s how I know I’m not doing well.
Lately, I’ve been pondering the idea of resentment and how it means that envy is the emotion you’re feeling. At first, I dismissed it because how do you go from one emotion to a completely different one? But hell maybe they’re right.
I may envy people and their ability to forget how someone else made them feel. Or how they’re able to just overlook someone’s actions. Because I can’t do that. I take everything to heart.
How can you not when those actions were directed at you? Even though I’m used to excusing them and saying, “maybe they’re going through something big, and I just got the short end of the stick,” “maybe they didn’t actually mean it,” or the great, “maybe you’re not the only one that they treated like that, don’t feel so special.”
Alright, but why does it have to happen? Is it that tough to be considerate of someone’s feelings?
Good thing I haven’t texted Yoongi. I’m pretty sure I’m having a weak moment.
Do I want to keep up with that mess? Because that’s what it is.
I just can’t stop thinking about him. I think I miss him. But I refuse to be the one that reaches out for him this time. I’m still pondering if I genuinely miss him or if I’m just fucking lonely again.
Pretty sure it’s the second one.
At the same time, I wish he would grow up more and be ready for something serious.
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“Sooooo… I dyed my hair again last night,” you confessed to Gemma on the phone. She was on her way to your house to pick you up because tonight you two were attending a concert.
Your best friend sighed, and you could practically imagine them rolling their eyes. “What color is it this time?” Gemma sounded exasperated, but she wasn’t; it didn’t even surprise her anymore. All her concerns were how you managed to not fry your hair whenever you wanted another makeover.
“I guess it looks kind of black?” You muttered and pressed your lips while you waited for your friend to say something.
“UGH, I can’t wait to see you!,” “you better be ready too because I’m hungry, and you know our pho place closes early!”
“I know, I know. Surprisingly, I AM ready; I’m just looking for my keys.”
This was your and Gemma’s ritual almost every Friday or Saturday night, depending on your plans. Tonight, it was Friday, and you had your usual king size pho, talking about work, your hair on this occasion, and most importantly, the band you were going to watch in a few hours.
You forgot to mention how you’ve been feeling about Yoongi. You thought that conversation could be saved for another time.
As soon as you arrived at the venue, the band came out.
It was one of these L.A. indie bands that both of you discovered this same year. Whenever Gemma was over at your place, you always ended up watching their music videos, fawning over the vocalist. So, when you found out they were doing a concert soon, you knew you had to be there.
It lasted around an hour, which was a little underwhelming compared to the other concerts you’ve attended. Still, all was forgotten because that damn vocalist was as dreamy as you imagined.
When the concert ended, Gemma and you found yourselves a table to keep talking over drinks. You didn’t count on Sam, one of your other friends, calling and telling you she was coming over.
You didn’t usually mixed your plans, but it felt kind of inevitable tonight.
You also thought the place felt kind of dead and guessed it wouldn’t hurt to have more people with you.
Sam arrived with her brother’s girlfriend. Before anything else could be said, they both said, “This place is dead.”
“What were you doing in here?”
You laughed at the confused expression your friend had on her face. She knew you were at a concert, but you then explained you were just sitting and drinking, nothing special.
“We should go somewhere else! What do you say about going downtown?” The brother’s girlfriend addressed you.
You pursed your lips and turned to look at Gemma to ask her what she wanted to do. “I’m staying over with you, so I’m giving you the privilege of deciding.” You smiled at your friend and thought about it. You wanted to keep drinking; it was barely 11 p.m.
You turned to Sam to tell her it was okay, but before you opened your mouth, she tried to convince you, “Come on, let’s just go for a while; Hoseok’s over there with some friends!”
Hoseok is Sam’s brother.
Hoseok is Yoongi’s best friend.
It’s pretty evident that wherever Hoseok was, Yoongi was there too.
Fuck, did I manifest this?
“Let’s go then.”
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What a miracle, what a coincidence.
A kiss on the cheek. All kind. Warm greetings—the kind that makes you want to kill whoever invented manners. You see each other from time to time, often at random places and gatherings like tonight.
You haven’t seen Yoongi in over ten months.
You haven’t seen him since that last date you had. If you can call it that.
Last year, life was kicking your ass, and Yoongi was everything you had. You truly needed someone, and he stayed with you throughout the messiest months of your life. He was your everything.
You were perfectly aware he was never going to be serious about you. He’s been in your life for eight years, and both of you have left the other countless times before. You two were just a bad joke. You never understood why he always insisted on coming back to your life just for him to treat you like always. Never something special. Never been the exception, always the rule.
But for those seven months, he acted like the person you always wanted him to be. You knew you were both a joke, but you always liked what “us” meant with him.
Last Christmas was the first time you spent a holiday together. It felt so important to you back then as if life was finally going your way.
You never expected what he had to say to you right on that day.
“First of all, Merry Christmas, honey”. He smiled as he looked at you. “You know I’ll always wish for you and your family to be healthy. I know this is important to you, but I’m sure you can rest a bit about that matter from now on.”
“I’m really happy you’re spending these days with me. You know I’m not fond of the holidays, but I want you to know this feels important to me.”
“I genuinely, truly, really want to keep you with me and for us to go out as much as we can, if you want to, of course. Because to be honest, if it were up to me, we would be doing a bunch of stuff together all the time, but it’s not just a matter of me wanting, so I hope you’d like that too.”
With his words, you went through all the emotions known to mankind. It’s been the first time you’ve heard something like that coming from him, and you felt strange. Thinking how you may have wanted that for years, now when it’s actually happening, you feel so disconnected from yourself, you start to think, “What can he possibly like in me? I’ve only shown him chaos these past months.”
But as soon as that thought crossed your mind, your heart told you, “Yet, he’s still here.”
He made you feel safe, so you committed to being the best version of yourself once again. After all you’ve been through, he’s never stopped being so good and patient with you.
He’s always going to have a piece of your heart.
Then came the inevitable change of heart one of you had every time.
This time, it happened to him. Of course.
You were supposed to go out one night, but you ended up going home in the middle of the “date.”
It’s like you weren’t talking to Yoongi anymore. He was acting cold, apathetic, indifferent, you name it.
You felt awful on your way home. You didn’t even want to think about the reason for his attitude towards you.
You wanted to feel hopeful, happy, and even in love, but it didn’t feel like that anymore. You wanted to trust in what Yoongi had told you just a few weeks ago. Maybe it was just something you wanted to hear, but you didn’t catch on to the intentions behind his words.
I actually fell for it this time.
There have been multiple times when you told yourself there was no future for you two. Why do you keep staying? It just makes you feel like shit in the end.
I just keep building unrealistic expectations, as if there was actually someone who could save me from my own problems1.
This time, you were hoping he was tired of you and would finally choose not to be with you anymore.
Farewell comes. Once again, you bury memories deep in the deepest ocean. Then it comes back and floats up.
There were eight people sitting close together at a little round table, and to your luck, you ended up facing Yoongi.
Beer never stopped coming to your table.
You had an impressive way of acting as if everything was normal. You were always like this. Of course, Yoongi made you angry, but you’ve never resented him for something. Acting full of hostility in front of both of your friends would never be one of your goals.
On some other occasion, maybe you would’ve ignored him and his glances, but you can’t deny that you’ve wanted to see and talk to him for the past few weeks.
Your friends weren’t fond of your “relationship,” yet they were always curious about how you two treated each other whenever you saw each other after a while. Everyone always knew when you two were together and how many months you had spent without talking.
You can’t tell if that’s good or not, but everyone knew it was just a matter of time before you started seeing each other again.
Tonight was going well. You haven’t seen Hoseok or the other guys in a while. Aside from whatever you had with Yoongi, they were your friends, too. Not too long ago, you always went out on weekends to bars, parties, and the occasional concerts.
Ever since you distanced yourself from them a little, they got into relationships. It wasn’t until today that you actually spent time with them and their partners and got to know them a little.
Jimin was sitting on your right, and eventually, you found yourselves talking apart from the others. He started telling you about his partner and how he got in a little fight with them over whether it’s right or not to look at other people at the gym.
Later, the others were all over that topic, arguing whether it was socially acceptable or not to look at someone else at the gym while your partner was there with you. All the alcohol you’ve drank made itself present. Your overall volume rose with each minute, with everyone voicing their opinions.
You had already told tipsy Jimin your point of view, so you got fed up with the subject when it turned into an actual discussion between Hoseok and his partner.
Sam and Gemma were still talking with Jimin over what he did, his partner’s words, and whatnot. So you found your chance to get up and go to the jukebox.
It took less than two minutes of you looking through the catalog when you suddenly saw a tall figure standing by your side.
“Hi,” he said.
You turned to look straight into his eyes. “Hi.”
“You look radiant, better than before.”
You bit your smile back and answered, “can’t complain.” Still searching for a song.
He came closer to you, “we meet again.”
A smile escaped from you. “It’s been almost a year, huh.”
Now they’re walking on ice. To see who slips first. No strings intertwined. They were never anything, but there was always something.
“I know, it’s crazy.” He wasn’t going to waste any more time. “Can we meet later?”
There was something.
“My friend is staying over.” You had already picked two songs but still had three more credits.
“I can come by.”
You were thinking hard about which songs to pick, but Yoongi was making it really hard to concentrate.
Of course, I want you to come over. Yet, I still want to hang on to the small remains of my pride.
“I think it would be better if we go out sometime this week if you want.”
Filled with anxiety over what you were arranging, you started tapping your fingers against the machine, not remembering which artist you were looking for in the first place.
“I thought you no longer wanted to see me.”
You lifted your chin to look at him and gave him a smirk. “Well,” you said with a nervous laugh, “I did, but I can’t lie to you; I’ve been thinking about you for days.”
“Why?”
“Why? What do you mean why?”
“I don’t know, I thought you were done with me.”
“Yoongi, we can’t talk about that here.”
You were finally searching for the last song. “Well, I’ll see you at your house later.”
Again, you turned to look at him but gave him an annoyed expression. You kept going through Pink Floyd’s songs, your distress not letting you find your favorite song by them.
“Can I? Just for a while. I want to talk to you.”
“Talk about what Yoongi?”
Finally, <The Great Gig in the Sky>.
“About why you left like that back then.”
You finally turned your whole body to answer him, “Alright then, you can come by later.” And with that, you returned to your seat at the table. Everyone asked what took you so long, and while you explained that you couldn’t find the songs you wanted, Yoongi came back to his seat, too. All eyes were on you, his included.
It actually got you happy that he talked to you first.
Untethered intertwining. They were never anything, but there was always something.
Sam, Hoseok, and his girlfriend left around 2 a.m., but the rest of you kept finding things to talk about.
You never stopped drinking, but you weren’t feeling drunk yet. In one of your trips to the bathroom, Gemma told you she liked Yoongi for the first time, and it got you all giddy. As you were walking back, you and Yoongi couldn’t take your eyes off of each other. Both of you were getting impatient to finally be alone again.
You’re both talking to your friends, and you’re laughing, and you look across the table. You’re not even far apart, but you catch each other’s eyes, and it’s this secret that exists right there, unnoticed, and no one else knows about it, no one else but you and Yoongi.
The rest of your friends were already drunk, so he told you, “We should go.”
“Come on, I’ll take you both home.”
Gemma hopped in the back of his car, and you got yourself in the passenger seat.
All your actions were too familiar for someone who hasn’t seen this guy in over ten months.
The next thing you knew, your phone connected automatically to his car, and he urged you to put some music on.
It was until this moment, on your way to your house, that you realized you were very drunk. You don’t even remember which playlist or songs you played.
When you arrived home, you gathered all your might to get Gemma inside. (Yoongi helped you open all the doors and, most importantly, carry Gemma to your room).
You got Gemma into your bed, changed her clothes, and left her a glass of water on your bedside table. You also used the moment to gulp a glass of water yourself. Meanwhile, Yoongi was already settled in your living room, his eyes not leaving you. Lying on your couch, recognizing when you were feeling more than tipsy. “Are you drunk?”
His voice scared you for a second. You did not realize he was still there or that he was watching your every move. Your smile gave away that you were indeed feeling a little drunk.
“A little? Maybe?”
The way he laughs always gets you. It has this cute yet manly note that you’ve always loved so much.
You curled up on your couch next to Yoongi, facing him. You truly wanted to hear what he wanted to talk about, but this newfound comfort of being on your couch made you sleepy. At the same time, the way he was looking at you was letting the alcohol in your system wear out.
His heavy gaze no longer made you think about talking with him. All you wanted was for him to hold you and kiss you like he used to as if he couldn’t wait any longer to press his lips on yours, to interrupt you while you were saying something with a kiss filled with the desire you both had for the other.
“Are you dating someone else?” His question shocked you. You looked at him wide-eyed. Yoongi looked directly at your eyes like they were the only thing in the room, fearing that if he looked somewhere else, he’d miss the truth coming from your eyes.
Your face turned into a frown, and drinking in his words confused you. You sat straight to ask your first question, but he beat you to it. “Is that why you left me?” The blood drained from your face.
Is he serious? Is he genuinely clueless? Or is he just being stupid?
“Is that what you want to hear? That I’ve been dating around?”
“I don’t know. It’s just that you disappeared again; if you wanted me to go to hell, you could’ve said so.”
“What are you even saying, Yoongi?”
“I thought you were dating someone.” He let out what must have been a bitter laugh.
“Well, I’m not… I don’t have time to go out with ‘people’.”
Do you even know why it’s so goddamn impossible for me to let you go? Because every song, every moment, and every person reminds me of you.
Why did you even want to see him this time around? Have you ever thought about that? It didn’t even matter because it was always the same. You suddenly forget how you feel or whatever you wanted to say as soon as you’re in front of him. Even if you said something, he wasn’t going to listen. He never does.
“Are you dating someone?”
“That’s not what I wanted to talk about. I need to know why you left me that night.”
“So, you are dating someone...”
“Just tell me why you left me.”
“Fine, I bet I won’t even remember this in the morning,” you laugh softly, maybe in preparation for what you would say next.
You collapse back onto your couch, sighing as your head sinks into the soft cushions. Your eyes drift upward, fixating on the blank expanse of the ceiling above you.
“It’s just that… I don’t know; that day, you were acting so strange toward me, and I truly thought you weren’t my Yoongi anymore. It’s like you were dying to get out of there, and I figured it would be better if I was the one who left first”. You smiled, but everyone could have seen the bitterness behind it. “I trust- no, I hoped… that what you told me that you wanted for us was true, but I couldn’t see a trace of that in you anymore. I didn’t want to turn into an anxious mess and think about you non-stop or… try to find out why you acted like that, so yeah, I left you again.”
He felt a tightness in his chest when he heard you say, “My Yoongi.” It wasn’t helping that your words sounded so real to him at that moment. This was easily the third time he’d seen you somewhat vulnerable. He was going to regret talking about this.
“Do you want me to ask you what was going on with you that day?” Your head was still on the couch, but it was now turned to get a better look at his face. You were still smiling.
He thought, Why is she smiling? Why is she always smiling?
“But you said you weren’t gonna remember this in the morning.” There goes his sweet laugh again.
“We can try.”
“Can we try with a kiss instead?”
Only the sound of cars driving by could be heard.
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You don’t even remember that kiss anymore.
That should have been a dead giveaway that everything was bound to turn out very wrong after that night.
The following days were even worse. Your conversations over text were boring and awkward. You felt that he was being an ass on purpose, as if he was making you pay for what you “put” him through. Sick and tired. That’s how you were beginning to feel towards this ongoing joke. Over the week, you started remembering the first thing you wrote about him. It was the first time you’d drifted apart.
“I want to see you. I want to be with you now. I hate feeling this needy. I like you so much that I don’t know what to do with all these emotions. Remember that night when we kissed for the first time? Our lips touched, and I think my heart lost its rhythm for a few minutes. It’s okay if you don’t remember it the way I do. But I want you to know that I’ll never forget how you made me feel that night. I think I fell in love with you since then. I’ve missed you almost every day since you left. I realized that I look pretty when I’m sad, but I look prettier when somebody says your name, and I smile uncontrollably. I wish I could explain the physical pain I feel inside my chest when I think about you. And I wish that pain could be erased if we’re being honest. I don’t know what’s wrong with us. I’m running out of ideas to make this work, and I feel like if I don’t do something to save us, you won’t do it either; even though I know you care, I know you’re just going to stand there, arms crossed watching everything drift away. I can’t get out of my head that time you said that you felt that you were hurting me instead of making me feel good, and I said that sometimes I think I hate you. I swear I didn’t mean it. It’s just that I’m too scared of losing you for good because I have this feeling that I won’t feel like this ever again; I’m afraid I’ll have to lose this part of myself that feels genuinely in love with someone. I thought we were made for each other. I thought you were one of my soulmates. I still think we are. But we keep fucking it up every single time. I won’t lie; I’m fine some days, but the smallest things break me. I know it’s not your fault that I’m so damn sensitive, but my feelings have always been this intense, this is who I am, and I was hoping that you would learn to love the whole mess that I am just as much as I love yours. It’s not that I can’t be with someone else and forget about you—I know I can—but I don’t want to be without you. I don’t know what it is about this day, but my head feels so much heavier when we’re having problems. I feel mad at you, and I bet you’re mad at me, too. Have I always been this hard? Or are you just realizing that being with me is a lot of work and I’m not worth it? I’m not ready to let you go. You’re the only guy I’ve ever wanted to keep around. You treat me so well when we’re together. I love when you take my hand in yours. I love every time it’s just you and me, and we talk about life. There’s no one for me but you. You’re the only face I can see. I hope you know I’m only pretending to hate you when I love you so much. After all, I’ll always hope it’s you and me in the end. I’m happy if I get to be with you.”
That was seven fucking years ago. Funny huh?
It was never supposed to turn out like this. Who would’ve thought that someone could pull you down like this under the guise of love? Was it really only an individual’s fault?
Did it keep going because no one wanted to be the bad guy? If we didn’t have feelings for each other, if we didn’t think of each other, would we have dragged it on like this?
Those words played over and over again in your head. Whenever you came to be together again, that was eventually all you wondered about.
That first letter was born when the first layer that was blinding you was uncovered. It was as if something was finally letting you see the shape of the person Yoongi was—or at least the person he was with you.
Next year. The second “letter” came.
“Everything’s been so weird lately. I don’t get you. You didn’t talk to me for three days, yet you still think I’ll say yes when you want to see me late at night when you finally feel like it? Seriously? I’m angry at you, but mostly, I’m angry at myself. How can I be so blind to not realize that nothing will ever happen between us? Why am I still here? I know it’s because I want to be with someone, but maybe that person is not you. Because if you wanted to, we would be something by now. I know you won’t ever change because it’s been 2 years since this started, and you’re still the same. Maybe I fell in love with the hope and longing. All I did was imagine myself with you, I thought I was being patient about us. I can’t help but be a hopeless romantic, that’s all I’ve been my whole life. Occasionally, I find myself doing dumb shit all the time, like apologizing to the stars on behalf of both of us for not keeping our promises. I’ve been thinking about how sad I have been lately. Telling myself I’m stupid for loving you after all you’ve made me go through, how useless I feel, and how painful every day gets, honestly, this love I feel for you is making me crazy. But I shouldn’t be worrying about this. I know it may seem complicated to live with a broken heart, crying until your tears make you blind. I keep saying to myself, “It’s time you get yourself together, fall in love with yourself again, and forgive yourself for thinking you were stupid when you only acted out of love for someone who couldn’t see all you were.” But let’s be honest, being aware of all this still doesn’t make it any easier. I still feel so lost. And confused. I wish I knew how to stop loving you. I miss my peace of mind. I know what I’m supposed to do but don’t know where to start. I know that one day we’ll cross paths again, and I won’t feel a thing anymore, but until then, I’ll keep trying to convince myself that I don’t want you anymore. What have you done to me? What have I done to myself? What is it about you that ended up putting me through this hell? For the past few months, we barely saw each other. I still remember the last words we exchanged, and I feel sick, I keep wishing you would’ve done something else, hoping you would’ve said something different, but wishing for this doesn’t matter anymore, I’ll just keep hurting myself if I keep thinking about this version of you that I kept romanticizing. I’m tired now. All this was too much for me. But let me tell you one thing. I never even thought for a second that I was wasting my time with you. Not even when all my friends told me so. I took pride in myself for “knowing” when a guy doesn’t want you, but you were so confusing. You used to always be there. You knew exactly what to do and what to say so I could keep my love alive, making me think that maybe one day we would be together, but now I’m truly fed up with you. I’m angry. I know I can live without talking to you, but I don’t think I can be in the same room with you and not feel a thing. I’m telling you this because I want you to understand me. I want us to end on good terms because I know it’ll be impossible for us to stop seeing each other. So please help me, because this won’t be easy for me. I still care about you. I love you, but I can’t do this anymore. I need to keep crying, but understand me, I’m not crying for you. It’s just that I have so much inside me that I could never say to you. I know now that I was too much for you.”
In the span of two years, all that relationship lay before your eyes, yet somehow you didn’t want to see it. You decided to keep your hope alive even if it hurt you.
Several breakups between the two of you. A few relationships with other people in the middle of it all. Countless times you wanted to run to him just one more time. The occasional texts came from him, asking how you were and if you wanted to meet again.
You tried to be strong most of the time. You even felt you had gotten over Yoongi on every period where you’d stopped running into him. Those were the times when it was easy. But it was also quite embarrassing how quickly you’d fall into his trap once he got into your head again.
So yeah, you caved in after that kiss from last night.
You were letting this happen. You wanted this on this occasion.
It should be fine, right?
Eventually, after a few weeks, both of you started sorting out your emotions and everything felt pretty normal again.
Why do I make things so complicated when there’s no need to?
You can’t help but doubt yourself and doubt him. You want to know what’s in his head, yet you know it should be enough for you that he wants to keep seeing you.
All these doubts made you realize that maybe, just maybe, you’re treating this in the same way you would’ve years ago.
Just focus on the now.
Aside from that…
You like him very much. He can talk about a bunch of things with you. He can be cute when he wants to be. You used to have a lot in common in terms of music. You like his style. And let’s not get started on his tattoos. ON TOP OF THAT, HIS ARMS. For some weird reason, I always forget he has dimples.
Ultimately, years pass and you always run back to him. You genuinely enjoy being in the same room as him.
No one has gotten close to how he makes you feel. Every time you see him again, everything feels the same. Your feelings towards him haven’t changed.
The two people connected by the red thread are destined lovers, regardless of place, time, or circumstances. This magical cord may stretch or tangle but never break.
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A month later
Ah, shit.
You were having a relatively good weekend. It was the 4th of July. You spent it with your family and now it was almost midnight but you were still texting with your best friend. She was at a party with Sam, Jess, and all the guys. You were experiencing a mild fomo, but you had a deal with your parents, so you had to pass that party this time.
Even Jungkook texted you earlier asking why you weren’t there. But that’s another story.
Your best friend was getting drunker with every text she sent, but she had put herself on the task of updating you with all of Yoongi’s whereabouts and doings.
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I mean go ahead I guess. It makes me feel like it’s my fault for not showing enough interest again. This is making me uneasy. Because I like him but turns out he doesn’t like me enough? I WANT TO SCREAM.
I shouldn’t be angry because it’s my fault. I know so. I’m not trying enough, and maybe this was bound to happen. I can’t ask him to just talk to me. He needs to live his life too, he’s human, and he gets tired of waiting for someone who doesn’t seem “invested” in him. FUCK.
He ended up coming to your place around 1 a.m.
And this time, you actually talked. You were worried he’d drank too much, but he showed to be as sober as one can be.
Before he got there, you were extremely nervous, but once you sat with him on your couch, all your tension and fears calmed down. You valued that he was able to make you feel that way.
Your feelings went on a rollercoaster in a matter of a few hours, it was so fucking strange to read those words. To paint yourself a picture of what Yoongi was doing with you.
“Why weren’t you at the party?”
“I spent the whole weekend with my parents, so I couldn’t go.” “I wanted to, though.”
“It would’ve been cool if you had gone, everyone was asking about you.”
A smirk appeared on your face. “And what did you tell ’em?”
“That you didn’t want to see me,” He joked.
You started playing with him.
“That’s sliiightly true,”
After that, he laughed but got closer to you. He even got a lot more talkative, narrating to you everything he and your friends did earlier on. You were pretty entranced in him. It’s risky when you love to hear someone just talk. He took in the way you were gazing at him and figured there was no point in wasting more time. It was obvious Yoongi only went to your place to see if he was getting lucky tonight.
You realized his face was inching closer to yours. Your eyes scanning his own. Him doing the same, with the occasional glance at your lips. You weren’t gonna kiss him. Still, you let him get close enough so your lips could brush each other.
Then you smiled.
You weren’t gonna miss the chance to let him try to explain to you what the hell was going on, so you thought you’d go straight to the point.
“Can I ask you something?”
He returned your smile.
“Wait, let me guess”- “You want to know if I have a girlfriend”.
Motherfucker.
Your smile faltered slightly at him guessing the question, but he maintained eye contact with you. “Yeah, I figured that’s what you wanted to ask,” he replied. His tone is a mix of playfulness and seriousness. “No, I don’t have a girlfriend.”
The way his mind immediately went there. We’ll worry about that later.
Yoongi’s words echoed in your ears, you couldn’t help but believe him. There was something about his voice, his gaze, that made you blindly trust his every word.
Yoongi’s expression softened, his gaze unwavering. “I want you to know that I’m being genuine right now. I don’t have a girlfriend, I’m not seeing anybody formally, romantically, emotionally, or whatever you imagined. I want to give us a chance to make things right for you.”
You clung to the hope that this time he was telling the truth.
A sense of relief washed over you as you leaned closer to Yoongi. Ignoring the cautionary whispers in the back of your mind, you let yourself be swept away by his intoxicating presence.
His lips met yours in a passionate kiss, and for a moment, it felt like all your doubts and worries faded away.
Days turned into weeks, and you reveled in the blissful illusion of having Yoongi in your life once again. Yoongi seemed attentive, caring, and utterly devoted to you. He showered you with affection, making you believe that you were his only one this time.
Over the next months, your interactions with Yoongi were limited to texts. There were no dates or visits to your house or his place, for that matter. It’s like he was growing bored. But that’s nothing new anymore.
You started to grow tired of his refusal to let you go, even if he didn’t like you the way you liked him. You knew it was time to move on and find someone who would honestly reciprocate your feelings.
And then, on a spontaneous note, one day, you stumbled upon someone through Instagram.
thv replied to your story.
It started with you two sending each other songs for a few days.
Then, when you got to actually talk to him. You realized he was funny, his music taste almost immaculate, he was extremely nice to you, and he cared about what you had to say. You basically had the same interests. And hands down, you enjoyed talking to him a lot.
Ever since you started talking to this new guy, called Taehyung, you felt like something had shifted in your life. And it’s only been 3 days since then.
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This time, it turned out you were wrong. Wrong about everything.
I can’t regret anything, because I tried, I wholeheartedly tried. I don’t plan to try and understand him anymore.
Yoongi had been lying through his teeth the whole time. He did have a girlfriend, and he reveled in his power over you. He enjoyed playing with your emotions, relishing in his control over you.
You found out a few days ago, and you struggled to know what to do. You weren’t going to just ghost him. You couldn’t pass up the opportunity to be passive-aggressive toward him, and it showed in your texts.
But you weren’t counting on that he was even more of a cynic than you. And you were getting angrier that he wouldn’t accept anything and refused to let the conversation die.
So yeah, it took 3 days.
It took you that long to get yourself way ahead of everything. About Taehyung specifically.
You don’t remember having met him before.
If only you knew that he remembers the first time he saw you in college and several parties after that.
He’d grown attracted to you every time he saw you. However, you never once seemed to acknowledge his presence.
And don’t get him wrong. He didn’t mind. You were just a platonic interest. Somehow he knew you weren’t exactly available even if he never saw you with a guy before.
He just took his chance a few days ago, not expecting anything. Just with the simple excuse of finally getting to know you.
He was a good listener, interested in your thoughts. With each message exchanged, your connection grew extremely fast.
This got you scared. You had barely talked to him and were already getting VERY INTERESTED.
On the fourth day, he invited you to the movies, but ended up going out to two bars and then dancing.
You shared even more stories, talked about your dreams, and even found yourselves discussing your insecurities in your love life.
Taehyung made you feel seen, heard, and valued – something you hadn’t felt in a long time. He was patient and understood your reservations.
On the cab, in the way back to your place, you rested your head on his shoulder, hand in hand, you truly felt so calm, it had been the nicest date ever.
Hell, you haven’t even had a proper date in years. So, no one can blame you when you finally let yourself be vulnerable for once.
Taehyung knew he’d like you, but never to this extent. He wasn’t scared when he realized he was falling in love with you. All he wanted was to see you every single day from now on. He took the initiative to plan a date next week, but you went out of town to visit your cousin.
So Monday it is. There was only one thing that you had to take care of. Before you let yourself move on to the next step in your love life.
Dealing with Yoongi was getting tiring, so it finally happened. The long overdue conversation occurred. Over texts, but it happened.
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For once, you didn’t see the point in continuing. You and Yoongi have been through this road way too many times, and nothing has changed.
You decided to cut ties with Yoongi for good on that Monday. From now on, Taehyung could be the only one in your head.
As you were getting ready for your date with Taehyung, you couldn’t help but think about your conversation with Yoongi just a few hours ago. It was strange how life presented you with new opportunities right on the heels of letting go of the past. The decision to leave Yoongi was still fresh in your mind, but you hoped that this date with Taehyung would make you feel different, as bad as it could sound, but a distraction to that awful bit.
Taehyung took you to the movies, and from the moment the film began, your hands found each other’s, fingers intertwining. The dimly lit theater provided the perfect backdrop for this quiet display of affection. The movie itself was fun at times, but it was almost a blur of scenes and dialogue because your attention was elsewhere. You didn’t realize that Taehyung also spent that entire hour and a half not watching the movie, but watching you. He observed the way your eyes lit up at the funny parts, the sound of your laughter made his heart skip a beat. It was as if he had his own private screening of your reactions, and to him, it was the most captivating thing in the world.
The next stop on your adventure was an arcade, a place filled with flashing lights and the noise of all the games you can imagine. You couldn’t resist the air hockey table, and without hesitation, you both grabbed the paddles. As the puck glided across the smooth surface, it was evident that both of you were really good at it. Soon, a couple of small kids had gathered around, their eyes wide with fascination as they watched you play.
Taehyung, multitasking effortlessly, started chatting with them while maintaining his competitive spirit. A little girl, no older than seven, stood beside you, her eyes sparkling with innocence. She looked up at you with a hopeful smile and asked, “Are you going to beat your boyfriend?” Her question caught you off guard, and you burst into laughter at her adorable bluntness. Taehyung, engrossed in his conversation with the other kids, didn’t hear the question. All he could see was how your laughter sounded like the sweetest melody in the world.
Distracted by your laugh, Taehyung lost to you in the game. The little kids erupted in cheers, celebrating your victory as if you had just won a championship. They eagerly lined up to give you high-fives, momentarily forgetting that Taehyung even existed. That was until he, still keen on entertaining the kids, asked if they knew how to play. The result was an excited chorus of enthusiastic and loud ‘yes’s’.
It was an endearing sight as Taehyung listened attentively to the kids. Meanwhile, you couldn’t help but smile at how easily he connected with them.
“Okay, guys, what’s the next game we should play?” Taehyung asked, genuinely intrigued by their suggestions.
The kids seemed to have a dozen ideas at once, and it was all a jumble of arcade classics, from racing games to shooting hoops. One girl, with a mischievous glint in her eye, pointed at the dance machine in the corner.
“Can we try that dance game?” she asked, her excitement infectious.
Taehyung exchanged a playful glance with you, and you both agreed, despite the potential embarrassment that awaited you. The music blared from the machine, and you gave it your all, dancing like nobody was watching (except a group of kids, of course). Taehyung joined in nervously, even though his dancing skills were almost too good.
The kids burst into laughter at everyone’s dance moves, cheering you on with each step. It was one of those moments where embarrassment turned into pure joy, and you couldn’t have cared less about who was watching.
It was heartwarming to see him engage with them, making sure each child had a good time. After making sure the kids had enough tokens to keep playing, Taehyung gently took your hand, and together you wandered through the arcade. The place was a riot of flashing lights and game sounds, but it all faded into the background as you explored hand in hand.
Eventually, you came across the game involving knocking down rows of clown figures. You both paused, taking in the challenge. With the timer ticking down, Taehyung turned to you. His eyes sparkled with affection, and amidst the blinking lights and arcade tunes, he asked, “Can I kiss you?”
You paused for a moment, your heart racing as you looked into Taehyung’s eyes. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to kiss him - far from it. In fact, you felt a strong pull towards him, a connection that seemed to grow with every passing second. Even more so, after the side of him you saw today.
But there was something holding you back, a nagging doubt that whispered in the back of your mind. You had just met Taehyung, and even though the chemistry between you two was sweet, you wanted to take things slow. You didn’t want to rush into anything, not after what you’d been through with Yoongi.
So, with a soft smile, you gently shook your head and replied, “Not yet.” It was a response that carried a promise, a promise that there would be time for kisses and more in the future, once you were both ready to take that step. Taehyung nodded understandingly, his smile mirroring your own, and you continued your adventure to a bar, still hand in hand.
As you settled into a cozy corner of the bar, the atmosphere shifted, becoming more intimate. The soft hum of conversation, clinking glasses, and mellow jazz music in the background created the perfect backdrop for a meaningful conversation.
You started by talking about your time at the arcade, laughing about how the kids had cheered for you when you won the game. Taehyung joined in, sharing his amusement at their excitement. It was a light and joyful conversation that made you feel even closer to him.
Taehyung was genuinely interested in getting to know you better. He asked about your family, and you shared stories about your parents and siblings. In turn, he spoke fondly about his own family, reminiscing about childhood memories and you noticed how much he loved them.
Work became the next topic of discussion. You both talked about your careers, your aspirations, and the challenges you faced in life. Taehyung’s dedication and passion for his job shone through, and you found yourself admiring his determination.
As the night wore on, the conversation deepened. You talked about life, dreams, and the things that truly mattered to you. It was a conversation that left you feeling a sense of connection you hadn’t experienced in a long time. You realized that this was different from anything you had with Yoongi, something that was still scary to you.
As the night progressed and the conversation with Taehyung deepened, you couldn’t help but notice the stark contrast between him and Yoongi. Taehyung’s genuine interest in getting to know you, his kindness, and his openness were like a breath of fresh air compared to the complexity and uncertainty of your history with Yoongi.
The realization that this connection with Taehyung was different, something new and potentially beautiful, both excited and scared you. It was scary because it meant stepping out of your comfort zone, venturing into unfamiliar territory, and leaving behind the emotional rollercoaster that had defined your relationship with Yoongi.
But that fear didn’t deter you. In fact, it fueled a sense of courage you hadn’t felt in a long time. Maybe you were ready to embrace something real, something stable, and something built on honesty and trust. It was a daunting prospect, but for the first time in a while, it might be worth taking that leap into the unknown.
The night had stretched on longer than you had initially planned, but you didn’t mind one bit. In fact, you didn’t want it to end.
As Taehyung’s car pulled up to your place, reality seemed to rush back in. With the engine turned off and the night’s silence settling around you, you both remained seated in the car. It was one of those moments where time felt suspended, and neither of you seemed in a hurry to say goodbye.
You gazed into Taehyung’s eyes, his warm and sincere gaze locked onto yours. Your heart pounded in your chest as you felt a mix of anticipation and nervousness. You knew what you wanted, and in this moment, you felt a surge of courage you hadn’t experienced before.
Taehyung’s voice was soft, barely above a whisper, as he said, “I had a really great time tonight.”
You smiled, your heart racing. “Me too,” you admitted, your voice equally hushed.
For a moment, neither of you moved, the weight of the unspoken words hanging in the air.
Finally, you took a deep breath, your nervousness mingling with excitement. “Taehyung, can I ask you something?”
His eyes were curious. “Of course.”
Without overthinking it, you leaned in, closing the gap between you and Taehyung. In the dimly lit car, your lips finally met a gentle and electrifying connection that seemed to seal the promise of something new, something real.
As you pulled away, your foreheads touching, you whispered, “I’ve actually been wanting to do that all night.”
Taehyung chuckled, feeling a newfound hope. “Me too.”
Unable to resist kissing him way longer, you reached out again. The kiss started slow, a tantalizing exploration of each other’s lips. Your mouth was warm and inviting, and Taehyung couldn’t resist the urge to deepen the kiss.
Your lips moved together with a fiery passion, tongues dancing in a tango. There were no more words, just the intoxicating taste of each other. Your hands roamed, tracing all of his torso, igniting a fiery desire within both of you.
Taehyung bit your lower lip, sending shivers down your spine, and you responded with a soft moan. Your fingers tangled in his hair, pulling him closer as the kiss grew more fervent. It was a hunger that had been building all night, and now it was impossible to contain.
The kiss was wild, a passionate exchange, a language of desire and longing. You explored every inch of each other’s mouths, savoring the taste of your newfound connection.
When you finally pulled away, both of you were left breathless, lips swollen and hearts pounding. Taehyung’s eyes bore into yours, filled with an intensity that matched the fiery kiss you had just shared.
He whispered, his voice husky, “I’ve wanted to do that since the moment I saw you.”
You grinned, your own desire burning bright. “I’m glad we finally did.”
As you entered your home, the soft glow of your phone illuminated the room. You couldn’t help but smile as you saw a series of texts from Taehyung, sent with an urgency that mirrored the fiery passion of your kiss.
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From that moment on, there wasn’t a single time of day when you weren’t texting each other. The connection between you two was electric, and it seemed like every message, every word, only deepened your bond. It didn’t take long for Taehyung to invite you again on a date, and he chose a taproom for the occasion.
Taehyung arrived the following Saturday at your doorstep around 7 p.m., his charming smile lighting up the evening. Dressed casually but looking effortlessly handsome, he greeted you warmly.
“Hey there,” he said, his voice a pleasant melody. “Ready for our night out?”
With a nod and an excited smile, you locked the door behind you and joined him. The short drive to the taproom was filled with easy conversation and soft laughs. When you arrived, you were greeted not just by the cozy atmosphere of the taproom but also by some of Taehyung’s friends who had already gathered there.
Taehyung couldn’t contain his excitement about introducing you to his friends. He made the rounds, enthusiastically presenting you to each one of them, his introductions filled with admiration. As the evening went on, his friends couldn’t help but tease you both when they knew you weren’t officially a couple.
However, that made them gush about Taehyung. They spoke of his kindness, his sense of humor, and his unwavering loyalty. They assured you that you’d found someone truly special, and it was clear they thought he’d done the same in finding you.
Throughout the night, amidst the clinking of glasses and the hum of conversation, you couldn’t help but feel a sense of warmth and belonging. Taehyung’s friends were welcoming, and their approval only added to the unique feeling of the evening.
As the night continued, the connection between you and Taehyung deepened. Your hands naturally gravitated towards each other, fingers interlacing as if they had always belonged together. There was a palpable comfort in being so close, and the world around you seemed to fade into the background.
In the midst of this enchanting evening, a message from Sam popped up on your phone. She was suggesting a plan for tomorrow - a baseball game. Without a moment’s hesitation, you enthusiastically said yes.
But what made your heart race, even more, was the eagerness to include Taehyung in your plans. You turned to him, a radiant smile on your face, and said, “Hey, my friends just invited me to a baseball game tomorrow. Do you want to join us? It’d be amazing if you’d come with me.”
His eyes lit up with delight at the invitation, and he nodded, “yeah, I’d love to be there with you.”
It felt like a natural step, merging your separate worlds and bringing Taehyung closer to your heart.
In your world, your friends were your anchors, your family, and the people who knew you best. If someone couldn’t fit into that crucial part of your life, it was often a telling sign that the relationship might not make it.
As you looked forward to the baseball game the next day, there was a mixture of excitement and nervousness. You believed in Taehyung and the genuine connection you shared, but there was always that sliver of doubt. Would he mesh well with your friends? Would they see what you saw in him?
But deep down, you had a feeling that this was a significant step. If Taehyung could seamlessly become a part of your world, it would be a powerful confirmation of your relationship.
Thoughts of tomorrow’s baseball game, and the potential changes it might bring, had temporarily vanished. All you craved at that moment were the hugs, kisses, and the warmth of holding Taehyung’s hand.
The atmosphere seemed to hum with your love surge, an electric charge that coursed through you, making every moment feel like a heart-pounding adventure. As you bid farewell to Taehyung’s friends, you couldn’t wait to be alone with him, to dance again at the same bar where your love story began.
Tonight, something was different. Your excitement was on an all-time high. The tension that had built up between you over the last dates, the unspoken desires and emotions, were now rising to the surface. The connection between you two was undeniable, and your touches were igniting sparks that seemed to intensify with each passing second.
In the dimly lit bar, the pulsating beat of the music coursed through your veins, syncing with your every move. The atmosphere was charged with anticipation, and as you moved to the rhythm, your dance became a sensual invitation. Your body swayed and undulated in harmony with the music, your hips swiveling provocatively to the seductive melodies.
Taehyung watched you with desire burning in his eyes, unable to resist the magnetic pull you had on him. Your dance was a mesmerizing display of confidence and allure. Your hands moved sensually across your own body, tracing the curves and contours that begged for his touch.
Unable to contain himself any longer, Taehyung stepped closer, his hands finding their way to your hips. His touch was electric, sending shivers down your spine. His fingers traced the curve of your waist, pulling you closer to him as he succumbed to the same fiery rhythm.
Your bodies moved together, pressed intimately against each other. The heat between you grew with every tantalizing sway, and the world around you faded into obscurity. In that moment, there was only the two of you, lost in the lights of desire and passion, each movement drawing you closer to an inevitable collision of lips and bodies.
As the night at the bar wore on, the two of you shared more than just dances. After one particularly intense moment, you found yourself with your back pressed against Taehyung’s chest, the thumping bass of the music reverberating through both of you. His breath was warm against your ear, sending delightful shivers down your spine. In that space, with his arms wrapped around your waist, it felt as if the world had disappeared, leaving only the sensation of his closeness and the rhythmic beating of your hearts in unison.
Between dances, you took breaks to calm yourselves with a beer or whatever drink you saw first at the bar. Each moment spent apart only seemed to fuel the intensity of your attraction. With every sip of your drink, you couldn’t help but glance back at Taehyung, a magnetic pull drawing you together once more. The atmosphere was heady with desire, and your chemistry was through the roof. Each dance, each stolen moment, was a step closer to something neither of you could resist any longer.
After those couple of hours of dancing that left you slightly breathless, you decided to seek refuge in one of the dimly lit booths at the corner of the bar. It provided a temporary sanctuary from the dance floor, allowing you to catch your breath and collect your thoughts amidst the lust that was echoing in your ears. The low hum of laughter and conversation from people around you provided a calming backdrop as you settled in, your heart still racing from the intimate moment with Taehyung, who had managed to stir emotions you hadn’t felt in quite some time.
He slid into the seat opposite you, his eyes locked onto yours with an intensity that sent shivers through your body. In the closeness that the booth offered, you could feel something deeper between you. It was as though the music, which had once enveloped you in its intoxicating embrace, was reduced to a mere murmur in the back.
With a playful grin, Taehyung finally broke the silence that had settled between you. “You know,” he began, his voice a low, seductive murmur, “I think we might just be causing a lot of jealous looks in here.”
You chuckled, the sound husky and filled with desire. “I noticed.”
His fingers traced patterns on the table, drawing invisible lines as he continued, “It’s not just about dancing, though. I’ve been imagining being with you like this since the first time I laid eyes on you, and it’s been killing me all night.”
You met his gaze, your heart pounding in your ears as you whispered, “Since the first time you saw me?” Not trusting yourself enough to say what you were really thinking, so you mirrored his words.
Taehyung’s hand reached across the table, his fingers lightly brushing against yours. “I can’t keep my composure anymore,” he admitted, his eyes never leaving yours. “I’ve been thinking about more than this all week.”
He paused, his gaze locked onto yours with a smoldering intensity. “You know,” he added with a sultry smile, “seeing you getting along so well with my best friends earlier, it just… made me so hard.”
The anticipation hung in the air like a charged current, a palpable magnetism drawing you closer together. It was a sensation you couldn’t ignore, a magnetic pull that seemed destined to ignite into something more profound.
You bit your lip, your pupils were blown, unable to contain the emotions surging within you. “Taehyung,” you began, your voice barely above a whisper, “if you keep this up, I think I might fall in love with you.”
His eyes sparkled with a mix of desire and affection as he leaned in closer. “Is that so?” he murmured, his lips tantalizingly close to yours. “Maybe that’s exactly what I want.”
Moments later, Taehyung led you to his apartment.
“I’m glad that we can finally be together like this.” He said with a sincere smile, his hand moving lower to cup your ass. He couldn’t resist anymore; he had to have you right then and there.
He slid his hand under your skirt, feeling the smoothness of your skin against his fingertips. Traced the outline of your panties through the fabric of your bottom. Taehyung felt a wave of arousal wash over him as he painted himself a picture of what lay beneath. Slowly, he slid his hands up your legs until he reached the hem of your panties. With a gentle tug, he pulled them down, revealing your wetness to him.
The sudden exposure caused you to blush slightly, but it only fueled his desire further. You couldn’t help but moan at the feeling of what came next “*Aren’t you going to see how wet I got because you?”
He leaned in and gave you a soft kiss on the cheek, then gently placed his hand on your inner thigh. As he did so, he whispered in your ear. “Do you really want me to do this?”
“I want this, trust me.”
He slid his hand up higher, feeling the warmth and dampness of your cunt. He could hear your soft gasps and moans as he touched your pussy. He continued to stroke you gently, feeling your muscles tighten around his fingers.
He heard your moans and started to become even more aroused. He could feel his own hard on growing in his pants, and he knew that it would only be a matter of time before you both got carried away. He slowly pulled back from you and looked into your eyes, his face flushed red with desire. You could tell that he was just as affected as you were.
You nodded, your eyes locked with his as desire coursed through your veins. You breathed, “I want you to touch me. I need your hands in me.”
A low growl rumbled in Taehyung’s throat as he gave you a hungry look, his fingers inching closer to your dripping core. “Fuck,” he muttered, unable to contain his own need. “I’ve been dreaming about this for days. About burying myself deep inside you.”
The raw desire in his words sent shivers down your spine, igniting a fire within you that burned hotter with each passing second. You could feel the wetness pooling between your legs, desperate for his touch.
His fingers brushed against the sensitive skin of your inner thighs, teasingly avoiding direct contact with where you needed him most. The anticipation was almost unbearable as you fought to maintain a hint of control.
“Please, Taehyung,” you whimpered, “don’t make me wait.”
A wolfish grin tugged at the corners of Taehyung’s lips as he finally gave in to both of your desires. His fingers dipped into your wet heat, eliciting a moan from deep within your throat.
“You’re so fucking wet for me,” he groaned, his voice rough with lust. “Did I make you this way? Did I make that pretty little pussy of yours ache for me?”
All coherent thought flew out the window as Taehyung pumped his fingers inside of you, hitting all the right spots that made pleasure surge through every nerve ending in your body. You could only manage to nod and let out a desperate moan in response.
He wrapped his other hand around your neck, pulling you closer to him. He could feel your pulse racing beneath his fingers, and he knew that you were enjoying this a lot.
He started to apply pressure to your neck, feeling your body respond to his touch. You let out a small gasp of air, and as he continued to choke you, he leaned in closer to your ear and whispered. “Do you like this, baby? Is this what you wanted?”
His thumb found its way to your clit, circling the swollen bud and sending jolts of electricity straight to where you needed it most. The pleasure was overwhelming, bordering on blissful torture, as he brought you closer and closer to the edge.
“Cum for me, baby,” Taehyung whispered, his hot breath fanning across your ear. “I want to feel you cum around my fingers.”
His words were all it took to push you over the edge. The coil of pleasure that had been building inside of you snapped, sending waves of ecstasy crashing through your body. You clung to him as you rode out your orgasm, his touch the only anchor keeping you grounded in a sea of sensations.
As the last tremors of pleasure receded, Taehyung pulled his hand away and brought it up to his lips, sucking your taste off his fingers with a look of pure satisfaction on his face.
After a few hours spent in tangled in touches, the clock ticked its way to 4 a.m., signaling the impending end of the night’s bliss. Despite the energy that was bubbling up between you, the evening hadn’t ventured beyond the boundaries of those lewd touches, leaving something else lingering in the air. As the minutes kept passing, a sense of reality nudged its way back into the forefront of your mind.
“You’re even sweeter than I imagined,” Taehyung’s voice, thick with desire, caressed the dimly lit room, echoing the sentiments of the night.
With a hazed smile playing on your lips, you gently disentangled yourself from Taehyung’s embrace, the need for rest tugging at your consciousness. “I have to go home, Taehyung,” you murmured softly, your words tinged with regret at the thought of parting, “I should get some actual sleep if we want to spend the whole day together again.”
Your fingers traced soothing circles along his shoulders, a silent reassurance of your affection. “You are coming with me tomorrow, right?” you queried, hope flickering in your eyes as you awaited his response.
In the hazy glow of his room, Taehyung’s gaze met yours, a promise dancing in his eyes. “Absolutely,” he affirmed, his voice laced with determination, “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
With a final exchange of tender kisses and lingering glances, you reluctantly bid farewell to Taehyung’s warm embrace, bracing yourself for your way home.
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Despite the lingering effects of last night’s alcohol roaming your body, a surge of adrenaline pulsed through your veins as you rolled out of bed, battling against the persistent fog of a very hungover you. With each groggy step towards the bathroom, the anticipation of the day ahead infused your weary limbs with energy, overriding the dull ache in your head.
As you splashed cool water on your face, the mirror reflected a mix of exhaustion and excitement in your eyes. Today was the day you’d introduce Taehyung to your best friends, a prospect that filled you with nerves. The thought of seeing their reactions, of sharing this part of your life with them, ignited a spark within you.
After downing a much-needed glass of water and popping a couple of painkillers to combat the lingering headache, you set about getting ready for the day. Despite the persistent throb at your temples, you couldn’t help but hum a tune under your breath, the thrill of today’s plan chasing away the last traces of drowsiness.
With each minute, the excitement grew, the clock ticking in slow motion as you counted down the moments until Taehyung went to pick you up. Finally, the sound of the doorbell shattered the quiet of the morning, heralding the arrival of your lover boy.
With a quick glance in the mirror to ensure you looked somewhat presentable despite feeling like shit, you hurried to answer the door, a smile of genuine delight spreading across your face at the sight of Taehyung standing on your doorstep, two large cups of coffee in hand and a grin that mirrored your own excitement.
“There we have my pretty and hungover girl,” he greeted you warmly, his eyes alight with anticipation, “are we all set for the big day?”
With a nod and a grin, you took the cup he handed you, the aroma wafting up to greet your senses. “Definitely”.
As you and Taehyung arrived at the stadium, the vibrant atmosphere of the bustling crowd greeted you with a wave of excitement. Sam, Gemma, and Jin were already waiting for you near the entrance, their infectious laughter echoing in the air as they exchanged playful banter.
“Hey, look who finally decided to show up!” Sam exclaimed, her grin widening as she caught sight of you and Taehyung approaching. “And who’s this handsome stranger you’ve brought along?”
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lmk if you're up for reading the second part of this mess 🤭 bonus. just a little jungkookie for fun
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75 notes · View notes
Note
What are Loly and Menoly gonna be like? In the anime&manga they didn't seem to do much besides beating Orihime up and then getting beaten in turn.
Well, until last week I did not know they had canonical names, and I cannot reliably spell "melony" so in the fic they've been renamed Cici (the black haired one with pigtails) and Vivi (the blonde with the pixie cut) , which is much cuter and fits with Aizen's weird double letter thing.
In the fic, they're aware that working for Ulquiorra is UGH, like- so lame. I mean he's kinda cute in a wet kitten sorta way but then he opens his mouth and says the dumbest shit you've ever heard in you life and you also live with Grimmjow so that's a low bar but there he goes, whining about emotions again. Like- we have, like? Prozac? Gin specifically brought you prozac from the human world boss. For you. Specifically. Complaining about being sad and then refusing to do anything about it is like, turbo-lame, you know?
(I may have also given them valley girl accents.)
But anyway, Hime-chan is like, SO COOL. She smuggled like, a ton of stuff in from the human world without Aizen noticing! ...And like half her closet but it was like? Subterfuge? Aizen got sooooo distracted by her wearing like twenty layers of clothes it totally never occurred to him that she might have stuff in the pockets so she brought all kinds of like, candy and nail polish- look how sparkly it is!! Okay, she did also bring her homework and she's kind of a dork but like? That's part of like? The charm? She's so earnest it's kinda sweet and you feel bad, you know?
Anyway, she's totes generous too! Like once she worked out that she wasn't gonna freeze to death, she said that if there was anything we liked we could like, totally have it? And she's sooo smart about like, color-matching- I'm a winter, but Vivi is totally an autumn, and there's a trick to picking out the right pinks and OH-EM-GEE! She totally knows how to tailor clothes too because uh- she's a little overburdened in the chesticular department, you know? Yeah, you know- Anyway, that's where this wicked cool outfit came from!
So like anyway, the thing I came down here for is that Hime-chan is also like, SUPER-GREAT at cooking which is really awesome because the only other person here who knows how to cook is Mr. Tousen and as you know the culinary situation is DIRE- Vivi says that yesterday, she saw Gin just like. Unhinge his jaw and swallow a raw chicken whole. He. Didn't. Even. Take. The. Feathers. Off. And worse? Last week I saw Aizen eating slices of white bread with nothing but mayonnaise.
They weren't even toasted.
So like, understandably, Mr. Tousen is like, MEGA-DEPRESSED and stopped eating which is super-sad so Hime-chan is gonna throw like, a kitchen party to see if we can get him to eat and then she was like- "we should totally invite the other girls!" Because I guess that's what humans are like, but she's really sweet and and she's so smart and she's gonna make like- what did she call them? Oh yeah! Guava-and-bleu cheese macarons! I don't know what they actually like, are? But it'll be good! C'mon it's gonna be cool and fun and there's gonna be a guava please say you'll come?
Tier Harribel, who has been doing an excellent impression of a granite cliff face this whole conversation: ...
Cici: *^*
Tier: ...okay.
Cici: OHEMGEEEEEEYYYAAAY! THIS IS GONNA BE SO MUCH FUN THANK YOU OKAY I'LL SEE YOU AT LIKE SIXISH? BYEEE!
Franceska: ...dude, what?
Tier: I have no idea, but I am extremely bored and actually borderline curious about this 'guava' thing.
190 notes · View notes
tortoisebore · 1 year
Note
i read the chapter again because I was sleep deprived when I first did it and omg tortoise.
I can't believe that every time I read hey sharpshooter I find another thing to kin about sirius. girlie was really going through it
Loved the tension, the angsté, love how you portraits sirius trauma and how it affects the way he perceives himself and his relationships. it's not!! talked about!! enough!!!
AND PLEASE THE KISS SCENE!!!!! I WAS SO DISRESPECTFUL WHILE READING IT OMG
James' scene made my eyes water really, he's everything to me!! And Sirius finally finally starting to accept the love he deserves it's adorable.
I think that you could write a chocolate cake recipe and I would read it like it was the bible. Great, lovely work darling, really 🫶 Please rest well!!
girlie was GOING THROUGHHH IT
sirius is so relatable ugh he’s so real he’s all of us
i didn’t identify as a sirius girlie until i got into writing this & now i’m like huh…………that’s so me. that’s literally me. love that.
yes yes yes portraying sirius’ trauma as something that still affects him all these years later even when he knows he’s safe and far away from it was soooo important to me when writing this, i’m so glad that came across 🫶 trauma never leaves us, even when we work to heal from it and learn to cope with it. it was v v crucial to me to make sure i did justice to his story and helped put him on the road to trusting and breaking the cycle of isolation he’s always found himself stuck in. bby deserves to know he’s loved and cherished and good.
i got SOOOOO carried away w the kissing but i couldn’t stop. they just kept going. it was entirely out of my control. honestly it will be a miracle if this fic remains at an M rating bc they are absolute feral animals for each other & once they get going there’s nothing i can do to stop them
james finally atoning for his chapter 4 crimes 🫶 we love to see it. he is so brother. best boy 🤲
i’m so so glad you enjoyed the chapter 🫶🫶 can’t wait for you to read 7!!!
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monsterhunting · 11 months
Text
20 questions for fic writers
Thank you @atlantablack for tagging me!
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
51
2. What’s your total word count?
875,350 😵‍💫😵‍💫
3. What fandoms do you write for?
In the past I’ve written mainly for Check please and IT, now I mainly write Stranger Things and sometimes the MCU
4. Top 5 fics by kudos
of the things you said (that you can’t take back now) (sambucky)
just let me adore you (sambucky)
secrets i have held in my heart (stoncy)
all these people think love’s for show (but i would die for you in secret) (sambucky)
i hate accidents (except when we went from friends to this) (sambucky)
5. Do you respond to comments?
Most of the time, yes!
6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
i just scrolled thru all my fics and I genuinely do not think I’ve ever written an ending that was even remotely angsty. I’ve written FICS that are angsty but I always wrap up the angst with a nice happy ending lmao
7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
tbh probably give you my sunshine, give you my best given I ended it with stoncy having a happy lil family with two kids
8. Do you get hate on fics?
I wouldn’t call it hate per se, but there is one particular fic I’ve had to enable comment moderation on because I’ve gotten a few rude comments on it
9. Do you write smut?
Lol sometimes
10. Do you write crossovers?
I did back in my FF.Net days
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
I have not!
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
I don’t think so. I feel like if I did I’d remember lol so I’ll say no
14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?
Ugh I don’t know… I feel like generally it would be katniss and peeta, but out of ships I’ve actually written for, either nurseydex or stoncy
15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?
sooooo sometime in 2021 or something i came up with this idea for a stoncy royalty au where Steve is heir to the king, Nancy is royalty from a neighboring kingdom in an arranged marriage to Steve, and Jonathan is their knight. but like Nancy and Jonathan have known each other since they were kids and have feelings for each other but can’t be together bc Nancy was always supposed to marry Steve, so there’s a lot of resentment and tension between the three of them that leads into…something else. and then there’s this monster in the woods outside the kingdom that has been killing villagers and Steve Nancy and Jonathan have to figure out what’s going on but also present a strong front and a specific image to the kingdom and… yeah. It’s basically a halfhearted outline and it’s the only pre s4 stranger things fic I never actually wrote bc i knew it was gonna be too plotty and I didn’t have the energy. I sometimes fantasize about reworking it into an original novel idea but let’s be honest, I’ll probably never do that either lol
16. What are your writing strengths?
Why would you ask me this
Jk uhhhh I don’t know. Dialogue? I like making characters argue with each other. And I also enjoy writing funny scenes. I would say I’m good at both of those
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
probably writing descriptions
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?
I don’t think I have thoughts on this??? I mean go for it I guess. I only speak English so that’s all I write in but
19. First fandom you wrote for?
I think it was narnia all the way back in like, 2008. on quizilla no less. only the real ones remember
20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?
This is sooooo hard but I think I’m gonna say who you gonna call? because it has a special place in my lil heart
I’m going to tag @fabesrutter @lavenderstobins and @marypsue (but no pressure if you don’t want to do it)
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lollytea · 3 years
Text
Girl Talk
(ngl I hate this sm. I wrote this fic yesterday, the file corrupted and i lost everything, had a breakdown, rewrote everything the next day because I am obnoxiously stubborn. Anyways Hunter and Luz content. Bon Appetit?)
(READ ON AO3)
“Okay, but what am I even supposed to say to her? Oh! Maybe I could write down some jokes on the back of my glyph slips in case things get awkward. Wait, no, I don't want her to think I'm not taking this seriously. I don't need to be goofy all the time just to hang out with her. I need her to know that I'm serious about her and this whole...romantic thing. And I know she gets upset when she thinks I'm making fun of her so...”
“Alright, so, get this. It says here that there was once this old witch who lived on the outskirts of Latissa and his whole thing was experimenting by mixing paints and magic together. Apparently the stuff he created was like....super powerful.”
“I mean, she said she likes me 'cause I'm goofy and funny and lovable and...and...and I'm sure there's other adjectives I could use but I'm drawing a blank here. So, who am I to deprive her of what she signed up for? But I can't just....ugh, I can't even think right!”
“It doesn't have a lot of info on his specific technique but I'm sure if we did some more research, we could successfully replicate his experiments. We're pretty good at figuring stuff out. Woah, wait. I wonder what would happen if we created glyphs with this paint....maybe it would enhance the spell's level of power. Oh, that would be so cool!”
Luz stopped pacing, the floorboards practically burning after she thoroughly wore down the surface with her frantic footsteps. She set a hand on her hip and turned a withering look on her guest.
“Call me coocoo but I don't think you're listening to a word I say.”
Hunter lifted his head to blink up at her, chewing on the end of a pen. He was sitting cross-legged on the floor, boxed in by towers of Eda's Wild Magic books.
There was a glassy look in his eye, as if he was trying to get his bearings after being abruptly yanked out of an alternate dimension.
He had been, in a way. Luz was inclined to call it “Booksville.”
When Luz first met Hunter, this sort of stuff was a big, huge No-No for him. She could've invited him to take a look at any one of those books, packed with information on that obsession of his and of course, he'd be crazy with intrigue but he would hesitate. If he even opened the book at all, he'd card through the pages with an almost jumpy sense of caution, as if the paper itself would sting his fingers.
Well, that ship had certainly sailed. It had taken him a while to get fully comfortable but nowadays, Hunter didn't ask twice before digging into the contents of Eda's books, soaking up every tidbit of every sentence until he had exhausted every page.
He had even brought his own index flags to mark his favorite passages. He had gone on a little rant earlier about how Eda was an outright maniac for dog-earring the page corners.
Luz made a mental note to never show him the state of her Azura books. He would probably cry.
Hunter had become so lost in the Wild Magic sauce, he didn't even seem to care about the fact that he was not supposed to be here.
Of course, Eda didn't mind that he was here. That is to say, Luz didn't technically tell her he was here. She and King were currently out, being menaces to society and all that fun stuff, as they usually were before Luz would sneak Hunter in.
So, to be fair, Eda had never specifically said that Luz was not allowed to let The Golden Guard of the Emperor's coven into their home.
It was probably fine, right?
Yeah, it was probably fine that Luz had been hiding The Golden Guard of the Emperor's coven in her bedroom like some kind of forbidden pet.
Speaking of forbidden pets, that precious red cardinal of his was perched like a Christmas decoration atop his shoulder. That little rascal did wonders for Hunter. He seemed so much cuter than he was when there was an adorable little palisman snuggling up to him.
Once Hunter had processed what Luz said to him, his features screwed up tight. He was offended.
“Whadd'ya mean I'm not listening? I bet you can't repeat anything I was just talking about.”
“Ugh! Yeah, Hunter, I heard you. Paints! You wanna start painting as a hobby and let me just tell you, I fully support your budding creativety and will hype up your work with my entire heart but please. Right now I am having a full blown Amity Calamity!”
“Yeah, okay, that is not what I was talking about. Also, I get that you're freaking out n' all but....what do you expect me to do about it?” He threw his hands about wildly, at a complete loss. “Man, I don't know anything about that stuff,”
“I don't knowww....” Luz groaned. “I just....ugggghhh.” She buried her head in her hands, ruffling her hair into oblivion, like it would miraculously stimulate her brain cells into action. It released some pent up frustration, at least. “I wish it was easier for us to just talk about girls together.”
Hunter perked up. “Talk about girls? Are you kidding? Of course we can talk about girls, dummy!”
“Wait, really?” Luz asked, taken aback by this apparent development.
“Yeah, for sure. One sec,” Buzzing with eagerness, Hunter dove into his stacks of books, emerging seconds later with a worn, dust encrusted volume. It was so ancient, the title had faded away but Hunter still put his finger to where the big letters should be.
“Notable Female Witches of The Savage Ages,” He rattled off delightedly. “They were considered the mothers of Wild Magic. Their style of spell was really quite advanced, see they--”
Despite her frayed nerves, Luz sill managed a weak laugh.
As insufferable as he could be sometimes, she really did like this nerd a lot.
“Okay, Hunter. Buddy,” She said gently. “This stuff sounds really cool and I wanna hear all about it at some point buuuut....when I say girls, I mean...y'know. Amity specifically.”
“Oh. Right. Yeah.”
Hunter's face fell with disappointment but he was quick to snap back into a look of cool indifference. He shut the book in his lap with a soft thump, set it aside and turned his full attention to Luz.
“Sooooo...” he began awkwardly, scratching at his ear. It could not be more obvious that Hunter wanted nothing to do with this discussion. But Luz appreciated that he was trying. “Girlfriend problems, huh? Shoot.”
Luz's cheeks darkened. “Heh. 'Girlfriend'. Yeah, that's...uh...” She was suddenly very inconvenienced by the existence of her own hands so she clasped them together tight to keep herself from fidgeting. “That is.....a word for Amity.”
Hunter frowned, puzzled. “Okaaaay? So, what's the issue?”
“Ohhhhhh, boy.” An ironic, long suffering smile stretched across her face. “Let me just tell you that there is a lot goin' on up here, pal.” Luz tapped her finger against her temple. “So if I'm gonna give you the full unabridged version--”
“You could summarize it.”
“You know I don't know how to do that.”
“Yeah, I know.” Hunter sighed. “Figured it was worth a shot. Okay, let's hear it.”
“Alright but this is gonna be a lot so I suggest you strap yourself in,”
Luz sucked in a deep inhale, with full intent to let the entire flood of thoughts cascade out her mouth.
Hunter's eyes snapped to the floor, like he was actually looking for a safety harness to attach himself to. Then he seemed to realize that was ridiculous, as he scowled to himself. Little Rascal chirped and he irritably mumbled something under his breath in response.
And then Luz took off.
“Alright, so!” She announced, clapping her hands together. “So me and Amity have known each other fooooor...a while now? Yeah, it's been a while. And we've been pretty good friends ever since and then one day, she rescued me from her scary mom and she had this black flowing cape and her voice went all low and then suddenly, huh. Doki doki, y'know?” She thumped a fist against her chest. “I was gettin' all feelings-y up in here,”.
“And then a little later I figured out that we were both feeling kinda feelings-y and I was all like,” She mimed a brain explosion. “Pshww....”
“Pshww....” Hunter repeated quietly, testing out the little sound effect on his tongue. “Doki...doki....?”
“Yeah. Exactly. Doki doki. Pshww.” Luz nodded, as if he had made a valuable contribution. “So, now we're both here in the same boat, fully shish kebab-ed by Cupid's arrow.”
“Hold up. What language are you speaking?”
“And things are....great? Nice? Sorta hard to believe but stuff actually happens. We hold hands a few times, we...” The volume of her voice dropped to a bashful murmur. “we kiss a few times. There was so many beautiful, amazing romance-y moments that happened, just like in movies, y'know?”
“Movies....?” Hunter's bewildered stare turned from Luz to the bird on his shoulder, as if he was going to get any further clarification from either of them.
“Right! But here's the thing. It sorta feels like all that stuff just went by in a blur. I don't even know how I did any of that. The hand holding, the smooches the....ugh! It was like I was on autopilot or something and now I have no idea how to operate. Now, no matter how hard I try to get the vibe right, I can recreate those moments. So now it's starting to feel like...I don't know how to do anything!”
Luz's arms were whizzing around like an out of control windmill.
“I mean, Sure, Amity takes the lead sometimes but I can't make her carry this entire....relationship? Flirtationship? Whatever it is that's happening here! I gotta act or something! But I've been thinking about it waaaay too much. I never know the right time to hold her hand, I never know if she wants me to tell her she looks cute or if now maybe isn't the right time or...it's awkward, okay?! I've been making it awkward 'cause I don't know what to do! I-I don't even know for sure if we're dating! We've never talked about it!”
The last sentence came out as a squeak and Luz realized she had used up all her oxygen and needed to take a breather.
Hunter had not said a word but Luz did not know what to make of that dissecting stare of his, that studied her with a mixture of confusion and fascination. Like she was some kind of peculiar animal. A flushed, panting, peculiar animal.
“So.” He said finally, holding his palm out for Little Rascal to migrate from his shoulder to his hands. “Why don't you talk about it?”
He asked like it was the obvious solution. Luz was a little irked by it, but she kept her patience.
“Oh, Hunter. Sweet Hunter.” She heaved an exhausted sigh. “It is not that simple.”
He still didn't seem to understand. “Well, why not?”
“'Cause it's--.....Uh.” Luz trailed off, twirling her wrist around as if expecting to snatch an eloquent articulation out of thin air.
“Okay. Lemme put it like this. Amity is....really special. To me. Sometimes I still can't believe that she's real and she's friends with me and she likes me and....whew.” She pressed her fingertips to her cheek, surprised by the warmth. Even thinking that sort of stuff prompted a blush or two but it seemed saying it out loud made her face scalding.
“Anyway, now that we're going through....this, everything feels so much more....fragile?” Her voice rose in pitch, uncertain if 'Fragile' was even a suitable word to describe her feelings. It was just a vague, wishy-washy concept to describe.
“Like I feel like I could break it all so easy, just by....” Wait, she knew. She had figured out her handle on this.
“Just by being me.” She felt an ache just by admitting it, but it was the truth. Luz exhaled unsteadily to compose herself, clasping her fists tight into the fabric of her shorts and she continued...calmly.
“I can't risk doing anything that's gonna push her or make her uncomfortable or scare her away or...y'know, ruin this.” She held up her palms with a heavy shrug. “I-I don't have a plan and it would be way too reckless to wing it. Who knows what would come out of my mouth? She tells me a billion times that my weirdness is what she likes about me but...it can just as easily be the thing she hates if I overdo. I can't overdo it.
Luz was expecting Hunter to look at her like she was dumb again, but surprisingly, he nodded. A slow, thoughtful nod, as he absentmindedly scratched Little Rascal under the chin.
As the silence filled a little longer, she was starting to believe he had nothing else to add, which was fine. She had wanted to rant her heart out but realistically, she couldn't imagine Hunter having any advice for her. This wasn't exactly his area of expertise.
“Hey, Luz.” He said at last, voice surprisingly breezy. “You know those books that you really like? Uhh, with the nice witch Azuzu or whatever,”
“It's the Good Witch Azura!” Luz snapped, hands flying to her hips. “And I know you just pretended to not know her name. You're just trying to be cool.”
“Yeah, yeah.” The corner of Hunter's lip tweaked upwards. “And wasn't there that other witch that you liked to pretend was Azura's girlfriend?
Luz scoffed, finding it utterly unbelievable that this obnoxious little man had the audacity to be so dismissive towards her favorite book series, when she had been sweet enough to smuggle him in here.
“She was not her 'Girlfriend', she was her 'Soulmate' and if you even listened to me talk about it, you would know that. For your information, her name was Hecate and she began as Azura's rival but over the course of the series, they developed a beautiful, unbreakable bond that was jam packed with heavy romantic subtext. I mean, even their declaration of their eternal friendship in Book Five, which was really emotionally poignant by the way, reads so much like a love confession, it's a crime. And it's like...Ladies! Just kiss already!”
“Okay. Right. Sure. I understood some of that.”
“I mean, I guess I've read a ton of Heczura fanfics to tide me over. It's hard to find a fic where they don't kiss. Hold on, you know what fanfiction is, right?”
“Yeah.” The light in Hunter's eyes dimmed. “You made me sit through that three hour long slideshow presentation, remember?”
“Oh, right,” Luz popped a finger gun. “That was fun,”
It was fun, but a lot of work. Hunter was pouting over losing a measly three hours of his time. Well, newsflash, nerd, Luz spent two weeks working on that. Nobody is getting their hours back.
“And what usually happens in those fanfictions?” Asked Hunter, propping his chin up with his hand, as Little Rascal hopped over to a pile of books. “How do they end?”
“I told you, they kiss. A lot of the time they look deeply into each others eye and talk about how they complete each other like two halves of one heart. And y'know, moments of miscellaneous fluff.”
“Uh huh. Interesting,” He mused, tapping his pen against his bottom lip.
Luz knew Hunter could be a little...eccentric but was he really analyzing fanfiction right now? Where did the sudden interest come from?”
“So, uh, besides Azura and Hecate, are there any other...boats(?) that you--”
“Ships.” Luz corrected him.
Hunter snapped his fingers. “Right. Ships. Basically love stories that you really like.”
“We talkin' canon or non canon?”
Hunter squinted at her, lost. Seems somebody was not taking enough notes during the slideshow presentation. “Both? A-all...?”
“Oh, well, there's a bunch.”
Luz had no intention of listing every single ship that had captured her heart. They would be here all week.
“I've spent my whole life reading books, watching movies and anime and--”
“Anime...?”
“Hunter, please!” Luz squeaked as calmly as she possibly could, but she could not deny that she had started to vibrate. “You have no idea how excited you just made me at the thought of teaching you about anime but I'd need to dedicate a whole day to that 'cause I need to meet Amity soon and I'm still sorta in crisis mode. So, let's stay on topic.”
Her brow furrowed. “Whatever the heck the topic is! Why are we talking about ships, Huntifer?”
He waved off her question. “Okay but how does the story usually end for all your ships? The book ones, the anime ones, all of them,”
“We've been over this with the fanfiction discussion. They kiss, Hunter. Geez, you want a diagram or something?”
“But what else?” He prompted.
“What do you mean 'What else?'”
Now this was just getting ridiculous.
“They kiss!” Luz said with a huge amount of emphasis. “And again, miscellaneous fluff. They'll do stuff like pick each other up and swing around, hold hands and....walk off into the sunset, y'know?” She waved off all that extra padding as unimportant to the conversation. (Though Luz did really enjoy miscellaneous fluff.)
“Well yeaaaah,” Hunter was giving off vibes of a grade school teacher who gave her little nudges in the correct direction but ultimately wanted her to figure out the right answer herself. She wished he could just give it to her because honestly, she didn't know where this any of this was going.
“But when exactly do they ask each other if they're dating?”
“Whaa?” Well, that settled it. He had paid no attention to the slideshow whatsoever. “Nah, nah, they don't do stuff like that. They don't have to 'cause they're already perfect for each other. All they gotta do is look into each others' eyes and they just...” Luz shrugged, feeling lightness bubble in her chest at the very thought. She had a feeling her smile looked pretty dopey. “They just know.”
“Right. And why don't you and Amity just know?”
The bubbles burst and the lightness turned to dead weight.
The question speared through Luz's gut. Her entire body went rigid.
She had known but...
She had been trying not to...
Not to think about it.
Because if she thought about it, she knew she'd cry.
But there is was. A culmination of every coil of underlying dread that had been gradually writhing in her stomach in a monster of anxiety, summarized in a short and sweet collection of simplistic little words.
Luz did not just know when it came to Amity. She was constantly taking shots in the dark. That is, if she was even brave enough to take a shot at all.
The two of them together were not as seamlessly synchronized as couples in love were supposed to be.
Her throat stung.
Her vision went cloudy with blotted tears but she managed to catch Hunter's stony expression break into one of sheer panic.
“Wh-- Luz! Hey!” He yelped, scrambling to pick himself up from the floor. He nearly tripped over his books as he stood and hurried over to close the distance between them. He made to reach out to her but his hand stopped, just as it was about to brush against her shoulder. It hovered there for a moment, fingers curling and uncurling with uncertainty.
“Luz, listen, I wasn't....I-I mean, what I meant was...uhh. C-c'mon, cut it out!” Hunter's voice crackled with desperation and despite crying her eyes out, Luz felt the watery chuckle at the back of her throat.
“Aww, does crying make the Golden Guard uncomfy?” She tried to tease but her words came out all wobbly.
In fairness to the poor guy, it probably did. Luz couldn't imagine that dealing with tears in a delicate matter, was ever something he would need to handle in his line of work.
For all she knew, this was his first time having to comfort someone like this.
“You don't get to make jokes and cry at the same time. You gotta pick one.” Hunter snipped, but his tone was not nearly as cutting as usual. Luz was almost tempted to call it soft.
Clearing her eyes with the heel of her hands, she finally felt that warm touch on her shoulder, and then another rest against her upper arm.
Somehow the gentleness cracked all her remaining composure and she dissolved into ragged sobs.
Hunter did not speak nor did he let go out her until she got every tear out of her system. He waited patiently, tracing circles with his thumb into her skin.
Eventually, her sniffles fell silent and her eyes no longer blurred. She took a deep breath and the following exhale was shaky but manageable.
“Are you....good?” He asked cautiously.
Luz nodded.
Hunter removed his hands so carefully, you'd think doing so would cause her physical pain. He must have heard once that people were more prone to being hurt when they were already upset and assumed it was literal.
“Do you really think that...Amity and I....” Luz's voice was low and quiet but her jaw was set tight. She refused to let her words be whimpered. She looked up, meeting Hunter's eyes. “Aren't right for each other?”
“What? No! No, no, no,” Hunter looked positively alarmed at the accusation. “Luz th-that's not even remotely what I meant by that.”
“Well, then I guess you accidentally hit the nail on the head.” Luz managed a strained, bitter little smile. “'Cause it's true.”
“Luz, c'mon,” Hunter groaned, exasperated. “Don't talk like that, you've got it mixed up.”
“No.” Said Luz, tone quiet, polite yet strikingly obstinate. “You were right, Hunter.”
For someone who loved being right, he didn't seem thrilled at all.
“When it comes to Amity, I don't just know. I don't always know what she's thinking or what she wants from me. After all this time, I-I shouldn't still be trying to figure her out,”
Luz wanted to figure her out. Every time she was in her orbit, she wanted nothing more to turn over every last piece of that girl and find every hidden gem.
But now, it like she was barricaded. Something was keeping her from moving forward, from discovering Amity.
“I mean, we've kissed.” The memories of Amity were turning more and more bittersweet by the second “I told her I loved her! We had our happy ending already! A-at least I thought it was a happy ending. But we're not acting like people who are made for each other are meant to act!”
“How do you even know how people who are meant for each other are meant to act?!” Hunter demanded, as though it wouldn't reach Luz's skull unless he raised his voice. “In all the love stories you've read, it always ends with a kiss, doesn't it?”
“And--”
“And miscellaneous fluff. Yeah, I get it.” Hunter shooed the detail away before clearing his throat.
“Point is, they never talk about what comes after. You don't read about all those awkward talks where they decide if they're dating or not and talks about what they're okay with and what they're not. It always just cuts to the perfect, shiny romantic stuff, all tied up with a bow and because of that,” He clutched Luz by the shoulders.”You don't know how to move forward in a relationship 'cause you've never had a frame of reference to help you along.”
“Hey, that's not true!” She tore away from Hunter's grip. “I'll have you know that I imagine my favorite ships as couples all the time,”
“Yeah and lemme guess,” He droned, setting a hand on his hip and launching into a mockingly saccharine tone of voice. “They understand each other soooo well all the time, they can practically read each others' mind and everything is smooth sailing and peachy all the time.”
“Yeah, duh.” Luz didn't quite what he was making fun of. “That's what being a ship is all about.”
“Okay, fine, maybe, but I cannot stress this enough,” He ran his fingers through his hair before making a cutting gesture with the side of his hand, directed at Luz. “You are not a ship.”
“Well, yeah, obviously. I'm only one--”
“I mean that the two of you aren't a ship! Listen to me, you're not Azura and Hecate. You're Luz and Amity. You're real people. You've got like a million different emotions and they're messy and crazy and you don't understand most of them.”
“Okay, Hunter, I get it, I'm a hot mess. You don't have to rub it in.”
“We're all hot messes, Luz!” He exploded. “Every single one of us. 'Cause we're real and not book characters.” He was pacing back and forth now as he ranted and raved, gesticulating like a madman.
“We gotta handle all the awkward conversations that don't fit into books. You gotta talk to real people to get them and you can talk to them for years and years but you're never gonna entirely understand them. In your love stories, it's all kisses and happy endings and it's shiny and sparkly and perfect and nerds like you Eat. It.Up!”
Hunter emphasized his point by poking Luz's forehead, shocking a startled laugh out of her. As wound up as he was, the noise surprised him too.
Her laugh was contagious and soon the room was silent, expect for the sound of quiet, breathy giggles.
One of the knots in Luz's stomach had untangled itself. Hunter did make a point that she could understand. Yeah, okay, maybe she had been a little too wrapped up in fiction to successfully navigate through her own life. Luz had never been the most logical person so it was comforting for a levelheaded counter-argument to whatever was currently inflaming her anxiety.
Obviously, this didn't fix everything. Now, she understood why this wasn't easy but that didn't mean she magically knew where to go from here.
Once the shadow of Luz's smile had finally faded away, she looked up and studied Hunter for a long while. Her gaze may have been a bit intense as nervousness began to creep into his features.
“H-hey. Uh. Sorry if I was a little too--”
“Huntifer, I think you might be on to something with this one,”
He blinked at her before brightening with relief, shrugging it off. “Oh. Yeah, maybe. I dunno, I guess it's worth some thought.
Astonishing how Hunter could switch from the cockiest, most obnoxious kid in the Boiling Isles to a remarkably humble guy. Maybe it depended on context. Or he was just embarrassed that he sorta lost control of himself in his impatience.
Luz nodded. “I'd say a lot of thought. But..I think things are still gonna be awkward. With Amity. I still don't know how I'm supposed to talk this stuff through with her.”
Hunter snorted, loosely folding his arms over chest and resting his weight on one hip. And just like that, with that simple change of posture, he looked full of himself again “You wanna know a secret that's probably not much of a secret?”
He beckoned Luz to lean in closer and said in a stage whisper. “Amity probably doesn't know either.”
Huh. Yeah, Luz knew that. She knew that at the back of her mind but...she hadn't really thought about it much. She was a little too preoccupied with her own inexperience.
Hunter's lofty grin softened. “So, it's a good thing neither of you are doing it alone, right? Don't you think you could figure out how together?”
Figure out how together....
The realization sank from the surface of her mind, and everything was processing very fast then suddenly, everything clicked.
Amity.
Luz knew Amity. Luz trusted Amity. Luz loved Amity. If there was any person Luz believed would stumble alongside her through things they didn't quite understand yet, it was Amity. And it occurred to her that Luz would help Amity in return without hesitation.
With enough notches and trimming and smoothing edges, if they worked through this together, Luz and Amity could click too. Maybe not perfectly, not for a while just yet.
But enough that they could make each other happy.
A swing of confidence so strong flooded Luz's system, she swore she nearly collapsed. She felt the grin tugging at her mouth.
She could try. She could absolutely try. They could both try.
“Is...that a yes?” Hunter asked, gauging her expression.
Luz nodded so speedily, it made her head hurt. But then she realized something else and she turned a very specific look on Hunter.
But before he could ask if she was about to attack him, she held up two fingers on each hand and then placed them on either side of her head so they jutted out just behind her ears.
“Man, I don't know anything about that stuff,” Said Luz, in what she believed to be an uncanny imitation of Hunter's voice.
He frowned. “What are the theatrics for?”
“You lied to me!” Luz was delighted.
“I-I didn't lie!” He loudly objected, pointed ears scorching bright pink. “That was just common sense, you doofus. You know, that thing you lack.”
“You know, that thing you lack.” Luz parroted, swinging her hips from side to side. Once again, her impression remained flawless.
“Don't do that!”
“Don't do that!
“Stop, you weirdo!”
“Stop, you weirdo!”
At the peak of riled up, Hunter floundered for a retort that Luz wouldn't shoot back at him with childish mimicking. But then he cracked and wound up sticking his tongue out at her.
Luz simply mirrored him and Hunter huffed indignantly, turning on his heel and stomping back towards his books.
He had barely made a few steps when Luz lunged at him from behind, draping her long, lanky arms around his shoulders.
“Wha—Hey! Get off!” He squawked, struggling to pry her off him as Luz squished her cheek against his.
“Huntifer~” She singsonged. “Can you please calm down for two seconds and let me say thanks already?”
Hunter knotted his arms and his scowl didn't soften but Luz didn't miss how he stopped trying to squirm out of her grip.
“Even though you were kinda rambly and all over the place, what you said helped. It helped a lot. I know this is something I can handle and I know that 'cause of you. Thanks, nerd.”
She waited patiently until she felt his shoulders loosen. And then he glanced back at her and there was a smile. A small, tight, subtle smile but it was good enough for Luz.
And then with a burst of adrenaline, she gripped him tighter and planted a big, wet raspberry on his cheek.
Predictably, Hunter blew his top. He screeched furiously and his hands went wild to push her off but Luz was stronger than she looked. And so help her, she would give Hunter this affection or die trying.
Dying trying did not seem unlikely, actually. Hunter had told her once before that if he ever murdered her, it would probably be her own fault. Luz could not argue with that.
“That is so gross!” He griped, once Luz had finally released him.
“You're gross~” She chirped, practically bouncing on the balls of her feet.
Hunter wiped the spit off his cheek with his palm before looking up at Luz with narrowed eyes
Luz did not have time to brace herself and suddenly she was tackled to the ground. She kicked and she screamed as Hunter dragged his disgusting wet hand across her face.
“GrossGrossGrossGrossGrossGrossGroooooss!”
Hunter cackled maniacally the whole time.
They carried on like rowdy toddlers for a while until Luz had to go meet Amity, leaving Hunter and his palisman to themselves.
It was too weird to admit out loud but he was disappointed that she was gone. Hanging out with her like this wasn't that bad. Talking with her, arguing with her, wrestling with her. It all made Hunter feel....so much like a kid.
Something that he had realized recently was that he still liked being a kid.
In spite of the doom and gloom of white of gold, of the clawed scars in his shoulder, of the spear that grazed his hair, a spark of childishness remained in Hunter that had never been entirely snuffed out.
It wasn't until he met Luz that he began actively trying to keep that spark alive.
The sun had long since fallen asleep by the time Luz returned and the moon was pooling in the sky. A little after sun down, he heard the downstairs door slam shut and the loud exuberant voice of The Owl Lady boomed from the floorboards beneath him. By the sound of it, she was celebrating a successful day's work. Hunter wondered what she and the cute little demon had managed to steal today.
His snoozing palisman was tucked snug in the crook of his neck, a pleasant warmth against his skin. It was a good idea to keep the bird close. If someone other than Luz came barreling into the room, he'd better have his staff on hand to magically conceal himself.
But once an hour passed and the chatter of the witch and the demon below gradually faded into loud snoring, Hunter presumed they had passed out on the couch. For the time being, he should be fine.
Hunter hoped that creepy owl tube thing wouldn't rat them out. Fortunately, Luz had promised that Hooty was willing to take a bribe but unfortunately, gossip spread fast in the Boiling Isles. Now The Golden Guard had a reputation for being a lunatic who visited the night market several times, buying dead mice in bulk.
He snorted to himself, combing through 'From Bones to Fire: A Study of Wild Magic Volume 2'. Everything he went through just to get his hands on knowledge.
Well, also to be young with Luz.
Yet another hour passed and somehow, being surrounded by his own obsession, Hunter got a little overstimulated. To give his brain a rest, he was now flipping through some tattered old magazine that Luz brought with her from the human realm. Some of the articles were practically gibberish to him but overall, it was okay. He learned he was a Scorpio. He didn't know what that entailed but it sounded cool.
He nearly jumped out of his skin as Luz burst into the room, announcing her return.
Startled, his palisman flew into a fluster, cheeping like crazy before it settled down atop his head. Hunter, meanwhile, had flung the magazine away so fast, it was like it had contaminated him, and snatched up the closest book to pretend he was reading it the whole time.
Thankfully, Luz didn't notice.
“Hey there, Little Rascal,” She cooed, prancing across the room and plopping down next to Hunter. “And hey, you little bookworm, you.”
“Bookworm?” Hunter knocked his shoulder against hers. “You looking for a fight, kid?”
“Whaaaat? Hunter, you wound me, I was just....Ohhh, my bad. I always forget that our bookworms and your bookworms are two waaaay different things.” She paused thoughtfully before shaking her head. “Actually, I don't retract anything. You look like a bookworm.”
“Yeah, well, you smell like a selkidomus.” Hunter smirked.
“Hey!” Luz bumped their shoulders. “Can you blame me? I've had one heck of a day with lots of nervous sweating!”
He was surprised that got him laughing but that tended to happen around her.
“So, how'd it go?” Hunter asked, even though he already knew the answer.
Luz's beam was as bright as a dozen of her light spells. The corner of her lip was twitching, as if she wanted to smile wider but it was physically impossible.
“We're dating.” She stated, no more than a whisper.
It obvious since the moment she entered the room, far bouncier and bubblier than usual but Hunter still grinned.
He had expected her to scream it from the rooftops, to grind his ribcage into powder with the force of her hug, to set off a riot of firework glyphs, spelling it out in lights.
No matter how she could have chosen to tell him, he would have been just as giddy as she was.
And yet, despite the lack of fanfare, somehow, it still felt so much like Luz. Though he knew that in the morning, she would tell the entire Boiling Isles, right here, right now, only Hunter knew. Something about that felt nice.
But the quiet serene scene was momentarily ruptured when Hunter spotted Luz re-adjusting herself out of the corner of his eye and he was immediately on high alert. Another raspberry, he could sense it.
“Luz, don't you d--”
It wasn't a raspberry.
The feather-light peck against his cheek was gone before he fully processed it, as Luz drew away with that big stupid smile still plastered on her face.
Hunter blinked away the surprise, looking to her with a raised eyebrow.
“What's that look for? In this family, we give each other hugs and kisses~”
He felt his lip quirk upwards as he scoffed, turning away with a shake of his head.
“That was so gross.”
“You're gross.”
“For real, it was even more gross than the raspberry.”
Luz burst into giggles and Hunter could understand why everything was suddenly a million times funnier to her. She will still fizzling with that giddiness that Amity had kissed into her and now it was all spilling out.
To be honest, listening to a teenage girl gush and squeal about her girlfriend did not seem like something Hunter would ever willingly subject himself to.
But this was Luz. His friend, Luz.
He lightly pinched the pudge of her cheek. “Heeeey. You wanna tell me all about it, don't you?”
Luz snapped her head over to gawk at him, astonished. And then the excitement took hold and her hands started flapping and she looked about ready to explode with delight. Her mouth was already flying open to give every solitary detail of her evening with Amity Blight.
But then she stopped, a crease forming on her brow. He caught that unreadable look she gave him and the way her eyes skimmed over the books that scattered the floor around them.
“Hmmm.” She stroked her chin with an over dramatic 'thinking' face. “Y'know what? I'll think I'll keep it all to myself.”
“Oh, really~?” Grinned Hunter. “I can only imagine all the romantic schmaltzy sickening stuff that occurred tonight. Miscellaneous fluff, right?”
Judging by the blood that stained her cheekbones, he must have been correct.
“Hey, Hunter.” She said quietly, resting her weight against his side. “You've been lost in your books for hours now. Would you mind telling me all about the most interesting you read about today? Reading myself is fine but it's way better to hear all about it from a bona fide nerd.”
Frankly, it was embarrassing how fast the giddiness practically electrocuted him and suddenly he found himself rambling. He rambled until his voice gave up but it didn't bother him at all because it was just Luz.
Luz hung on every word he said.
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botwstoriesandsuch · 4 years
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[Image ID: A screenshot of an anon asking saying “I just wanna say that your tags whenever you rb art and fics are so cute 🥺 you reblogged something of mine the other day and the tags were just so nice and innocent??? It’s like watching a little kid at an aquarium 😝so as an artist I thank you, hope you don’t take it as cringy” End ID]
- - - - - 
Cringey?? nonononono I may be a young kid watching the pretty fish swim aimlessly in the aquarium but I will
recklessly enjoy other people’s content don’t test me
I try to keep it in the tags cause I don’t wanna take away from the op’s original work, plus it makes it easier for other people to rb it from me, but I will amp up the love and appreciation when the situation calls for it. You could straight up come into my inbox or messages and just ask me to give you a reblog and I will do it, I do not care I love you, content creators.
Cringe Culture is dead it’s time to gush plus if I do this often enough people might do it more for me so it’s a win win hehe
Legit, I got a super sweet comment on one of my fics quoting something I wrote and it made me so happy so I was like “huh, guess I’ll do that more often then” and now I’m doing that, that’s how impressionable I am asdfghjk
Also hello?? specifically *my* tags helped you out?? I am a nobody, CLEARLY not enough people are doing this smh, allow me to teach the masses for a sec here
How To Make A Content Creator Happy: the world’s simplest guide to spreading serotonin through a keyboard
Step fucking one) You reblog it. I mean, that’s a given. You’ve all seen those “reblogs help creators out and likes do nothing” posts so I won’t rant too much. Likes are good, but reblogs are like handing someone a stack of a hundred dollars and all it takes is one click! 
(PRO TIP: Hold down the button and swipe for mobile, and hold the left alt button and click once for computer [though it will only rb to your main blog. if you want it for a side-blog then you’re stuck with two clicks but HEY two clicks to help out a creator you like is nothing!])
You share it! Just share stuff. Share the ao3 like, please do it. Don’t repost, don’t just mention it, give the links especially when you’re just in conversation or talking about it around plz I swear it does wonders
Ok moving on to the super simple stuff for commenting and putting stuff in the tags because I guarantee that the op will read them
write A N Y T H I N G and I literally mean anything just fucking:
!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
sdjflksdjfkjh
?!?!?!?!!?
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhghghhhhhhhhh
:OOOOOOOOO
prettyyy
<33333333333333333
just fucking go ham, go nuts, it doesn’t need to be coherent it just needs to EXIST the very existence of someone enjoying someone’s content gives so much serotonin so stop being silent cowards and give us a smiley face from time to time
uh what else what else....hmm [golden rule is treat others the way you want to be treated, so if you’re a creator yourself, just give whatever you would want seen in the comments of your stuff! I mean that’s how I came up with all this...]
Point out the details! I mentioned earlier about quoting stuff from fics (that stuff is just 👌👌👌 so delicious) but I’m pretty sure (I’m not an artist myself don’t quote me) that the exact same effect is present when you talk about details in art or something. So talk about that pretty snowflake in the background! Or that piece of dialogue that made you laugh. Just a simple nod to the details is a big difference between saying “I like this” versus “I like this thing that you took the time to make the effort you put into the details did not go unnoticed”
just ALL the feedback please and thank you
this might vary from person to person, though personally I love when people are like “The way you write imagery is so good please do more!!” so just give a little nod to someone like “The way you draw this character is amazing please do more” or something like that
I wouldn’t go as far as to give criticism (although personally I’m the type of person that loves the occasionally critique for future reference, cause it means that you care as much as I do about the quality of my work) 
But along the same lines as the details thing, a nice nod to a creator about what they’re doing right is sooooo good! makes the butterflies flutter
                ~~~~~~Did that post give you emotions?~~~~~~
   G   O   O   D
 ~~FUCKING TELL US~~
THE ACT OF SOMEONE WRITING A SET OF LETTERS, OR SOMEONE SKETCHING A BLOB MADE ANOTHER DISTANT HUMAN BEING DEVELOP CHEMICALS IN THEIR BRAIN?? SURE WOULD LOVE TO KNOW THAT BECAUSE WOW THAT’S AMAZING!?!??
just go “I’m so happy” or “I’m so sad” just “TT__TT” just fucking “:OO” or just “I hate this” [HUMOURISTICALLY] and “I can’t believe you’ve done” just give it yes tell us the emotion that you have felt we love it
I don’t think enough people understand how amazing that is???? You were once in a normal, neutral state, and then a piece of content that I created just made you smile or laugh or cry like WHAT that’s amazing omg
Ok so that’s pretty much the simple stuff right, that’s your elementary classwork right there
Just give something, literally anything and just go “I love this so much!!!!!” bam done, you just murdered the op with your love, great job
So yeah, that’s that. Pretty simple stuff, no?
...but you wanna graduate to master class?
You wanna fucking go ape shit
you wanna just
g o    t o    town?
I said this was gonna be a simple guide so don’t worry, I’m not gonna tell you that you have to write a full length essay on every post that you come across
[BUT IF YOU WANT TO DON’T LET ME STOP YOU THAT WOULD ACTUALLY BE AMAZING?? HELL WRITING OUT A PARAGRAPH OF A COMMENT IS ALREADY JUST *CHEFS KISS* MASTERCLASS OF MURDERING THE OP WITH LOVE JUST ANALYZING THE SHIT OUT OF THE COLORS AND SHADING AND FRAMING OR JUST POINTING OUT THE THEMES AND SUBTEXT AND CHARACTERIZATION --part of the reason I love betaing stuff so much because I can analyze shit and shower it with premature love while also helping fics to be even better than they were originally ugh so cleansing for my literature heart-- SO YEAH GIVE CREATORS A PARAGRAPH, DARE I DREAM OF PARAGRAPHS, BECAUSE WOW YES PLEASE YES]
...ahem anyway
the way to graduate from good to great as a receiver of content is
to do all this
any of this
any of this simple stupid amazing shit
and just
put it in an ask or message
that’s literally it
Let me tell you why that’s so amazing, it pumps up the already amazing dopamine dosage of these actions alone, and multiplies it by a hundred, let me tell you why
Let’s say you read a drabble. You loved it, you reblogged it, you gave it hearts and emojis and ranted for a few tags about how it made you drop your muffin on the ground. Fantastic work, you just made the op pass out.
Then you go about your day and that’s the end of that.
BUT
if you do all that
and then put it in an ASK
dare you even a direct message?? (probably not most of us on here are cowards I get that)
but an ASK, anon or otherwise?
The message you just sent to the op was “I interacted with the post you made, and I loved it so much that I went the extra mile of going to your blog to make extra extra sure you understand how much I liked your thing”
There’s a wordless wall with every post! You like and reblog the thing and move on with your day. 
But the fact that YOU sent a HEART a SINGLE sentence about how you liked a thing? the fact that you BREACHED that wall and just fucking keyboard smashed in the inbox? the fact that you did that is the most amazing thing in the world
you just ambush the op with good vibes. we were expecting the bare minimum in the comments and tags, but the fact you when out of your way to make it a message or ask???? superb, outstanding, the sheer SHOCK of it will shift tectonic plates
you’re my fucking hero if you do this. you’re a godsend. I would kill for you,👏people👏would👏kill👏for👏you.
AT LEAST THEY WOULD KILL FOR YOU IF THIS ACTION DIDN’T ALREADY MURDER THEM
BE A MURDERER, NAY, A SERIAL KILLER. MURDER CONTENT CREATORS WITH LOVE
BE RECKLESSLY KIND AND LOVING YOU PIECE OF SHIT, ITS IMPOSSIBLE TO BE CRINGY TO STARVING AND DYING WRITERS AND ARTISTS WE WILL TAKE IT ALL GOD DAMMIT
YOU ARE A CHILD STARING UP AT AN AQUARIUM IN WONDER.
MAKE YOUR HAPPINESS STIR THE TIDES, LET YOUR PRESCENCE BE KNOWN PAST THE REFLECTION OF THE GLASS.
THE FISH ARE LOOKING FOR YOUR SMILE. 
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ccsthemovie2 · 3 years
Note
(I think it's a word over 500, but:)
"Speaking of Tsukishiro, how's he doing?", Eriol asks. Frying pan to fire to volcano.
"He's good," Touya says quickly, before Sakura can say anything. Yukito is not even in the ballpark of "good". Yesterday he called Touya and begged him to bike over and said it was important and when Touya showed up he was asleep, and stayed fast asleep right through to the next morning. He keeps trying to make appointments with doctors, and then falling asleep before he can call, or, when Touya calls for him, before he can make it out the door. Privately, Touya isn't sure how much good a doctor can do for him, but anything has to be better than this, right?
"Really? I'm glad to hear it." Ugh, how much has Sakura told him. Not that she doesn't have a right to talk to her friends, but, come on, would it kill her to least keep it between her and Tomoyo and the funny looking cat.
He's good, that's an obvious lie. Ruby has said Yukito could barely stand upright at school. Every inch of Touya Kinomoto is packed full of magic. Sooner or later, Eriol figures, either Sakura will be powerful enough to sustain him, or Yue will have to get over himself and just eat already. Touya can't actually do anything with his magic, so it's not like Yue, even weak as he is, will have to face much of a struggle to take it. (Aside from competition with Ruby, of course. There's something to that, right, articles and studies about animals being healthier if they need a bit of careful planning to get their food? Yes, so this works out nicely.)
Or maybe- oh, that's probably it. Yue's on to him, isn't he? He's just being stubborn as usual, figuring sooner or later Clow will appear via Eriol and save him. He can imagine how surprised, overjoyed, grateful Yue would be, if Eriol showed up and saved his life. He can imagine Yue's head resting on his neck as clearly as if he had kept Yue well-fed with magic a thousand times in his lifetime. It would be nice, in the short run, but it wouldn't be right, no. Clow is dead, and Yue needs to learn to live with that. If he knows what's good for him, he will take responsibility for his own life, and if he doesn't...
Ahh, well, maybe it's Clow's old sentimentality, maybe Eriol is just warming up to Sakura's moon guardian all on his own, but he can't bring himself around to the idea of letting Yue just die. He'd save him, if it came down to it. But, he tells himself sternly, only as an absolute last resort. He's just worrying because he misses Yue and wants to get to know him better all at once in that past-and-future way- it's worth a visit, soon. Yes, a nice little visit, and Yue will never even have to know it happened. Just to check in.
(sorry the formatting got weird when i copypasted lol!)
hiiii thanks for the ask!!!
if we talk about this convo we need to back up and talk about how it got here. this should give you some idea of how badly this needs to be under a cut for length lol.
so it all starts with the bit about how someone falling and being caught is something that happens a lot in ccs. how with eriol, it's purposeful, and with fujitaka (and i misremembered it but since found out she fell *on* him and not *caught* by him, which lolol i hope he broke a bone, but also its fine the fic's already marked canon divergent, or maybe the story gets misremembered, whatever, in any case), it's an echo of clowriol's intentional artificial-trustbuild-dangersaves but without the magic or purpose to back it up (just like fujitaka himself!), but it's a situation he quickly makes favorable to him, because it may be a blank slate but it's made of the same material.
this whole convo was part of one of the very first chunks written, but everything was going to go in a very different direction at first. (there's a lot of Cut Content from this fic, some that i just didn't like, some that wasn't connectable with the rest of the fic after it took the shape it took but might pop up somewhere else one day idk). in this particular bit i cut the later half of the conversation because i really didn't like what i'd written, but then even though the direction of the story changed the conversation was still going so it had to bounce somewhere else, so it bounced to yukito. here we are answering your ask 2 paragraphs in!
yukito, iirc in the anime, did catch her from a fall, (in the manga, which made way more sense for why she had to change her clothes and rest so much, he saved her from drowning, again iirc because who can trust a memory) and at a point where eriol still has some investment in making yuekito/sakura (ewwwww) happen, he's going to try and draw on that symbolism to nudge her in that direction, right?
so all this said, SPEAKING of yuekito. how are they doing.
bad, obviously. touya's freaking out. i imagine that part of what's stopping yukito from seeing a doctor is yue, though- he knows it wont help, and i dont think yukito has, like, person insides that will stand up to medical tests, and yue would pick up on yukito like, not wanting to be outed to the doctor as a magic construct because he, like, doesnt actually have a real heart that pulses, just a repeating heartbeat sound. doesn't for real have blood etc to test, just records of blood type (for personality reasons).
and also touya's a very like keep-ur-problems-not-everybodys-business type so hes like imagining sakura venting her fears to this weirdo and getting pissed off. but that didnt actually happen, eriol knew all on his own lolol. touya you have to say something nice should happen to sakura to make up for wrongly suspecting her now
and this bit on eriol's end is all wrong information and inaccurate conclusions and i was really worried ppl would take it at face value but i hope nobody did. in ccs we get moments where eriol wants sakura to take power, or to learn that power can be taken- his final battle with her, for example, where the answer to his light and dark puzzle is to use kero and yue's power, except that's not something she would ever Want to do or would even Occur to her to try. the power is gifted to her by kero and yue (and syaoran!) because they love her.
same concept, here- the answer to the 'yue is dying' puzzle is to eat touya's power, and he can't imagine the real reason why he won't just do that, and when he thinks about it too long it goes right to his ego- yue looovvvvesss clow, and by extension me. he wants meeeeeee to save him. he wants to neck kissy MY magic soo sooooo bad. but yue isn't considering any of that at all. he's thinking about yukito and what touya means to yukito and why that would make yukito hesitate to reach out, and that no way in hell will he just ambush his other self's crush down a dark alley and take his magic, even to save both their lives. he's a lot more selfless than clow and eriol ever realize. maybe- this is just a half formed thought right now, i dont know if im like certain about it, but- maybe they feel his devotion to clow was a form of selfishness, that he Wanted Love as a thing he could hold and own, whereas pretty much everybody else who meets him goes like YOU SELFLESS MAN YOU CANT JUST DIE FOR PPL YOU CARE ABOUT YOU GOTTA TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF TOOOO
and there’s also that bit of teacherliness intrinsic to the three of them again: im doing this to teach him a lesson. im letting ruby do her thing without telling her what’s going on to help and encourage yue, etc.
anyway, that (in terms of fic weaving itself into canon) solidifies his decision to do uhmmmm a thing that creeps me out real bad in the anime (knocking yue out to have a moment with him, and oh, ding, there's another 'you fell but i caught you' moment!). eriol loves this manner of hanging out with people, you see it later in this fic, even:
It's important to say what's in your heart to the people you want to say it to, even if you have to make sure the other person never hears it. It's important for your own emotional freedom.
he loves to spend time with people exclusively on his terms, to the point where the other party never even knew he was there, because he knocked them out, or because he was just staring creepily at the outside of sakura's house while she did homework, etc etc etc.
tldr: it's all connected, aaaaaaaaa
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talas-starlight · 4 years
Text
Killing me softly - Sokka x reader
SUMMARY: Having only heard good things about Sokka, you always wanted to see how great he is for yourself. When you finally get the opportunity, you struggle to find him as funny as everyone said.  
This is based off the song killing me softly by the fugees which you can listen to: here! or there is a version by zhavia: here!
I strongly suggest you listen to the song because I think the whole vibe you get from it will get you in the mindset for this (and hopefully distract you from how poorly this was executed AHAH)
WORD COUNT: 2.6k
WARNINGS: angsty vibes. tried to have a hopeful ending but idk if it worked lol. poor writing skills.
A/N: ahA I really couldn’t get this idea out of my head so here we are! most certainly did not do this concept/ song fic justice to the way I imagined it but lol this shit low key hurted my feelings but also tried to turn it around? Idk I think this is okay?
KEY: words in-between dividers = lyrics MY MASTERLIST: here!
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I heard he sang a good song, I heard he had a style And so I came to see him, to listen for a while And there he was, this young boy, a stranger to my eyes
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You knew nothing and everything about him all at the same time. Hakoda allowed you to join them as they recruited people across the nations to prepare for invasion day. In doing so, you unknowingly signed a non-verbal contract to hear all the stories and jokes about his son, Sokka. Of course, he spoke highly of his daughter, but there was an unrelenting sense of pride and joy that came with hearing about him.
“You’ll really enjoy speaking with him y/n. He can take any dull or sad moment and turn it into something that will make you laugh beyond your years. He’s been through so much, but he’s become the warrior I knew he was always destined to be.”
It was impossible not to want to meet him. You wanted to hear the stories in the flesh as he became the light in the darkness of this war.
Yet when he finally boarded the ship with his friends after Ba Sing Se, that’s all he became, a story. As a mechanic and strategist, your time was booked to the brim, building upon the plans Sokka created himself. Somehow, you managed to have interactions with Katara and Toph, even Momo, but being in the same room as Sokka? Impossible. You weren’t avoiding him by any means, and neither was he, it just seemed that even when confined to the space of a ship your duties dragged both of you into different directions…. Until now.
Finally having time to relax as you finished reviewing a draft for one segment of the invasion, you made your way mess hall in a desperate search to consume any food you could get your hands on. Walking in, Toph perked up at feeling your presence when entering the room. Considering you were always busy when working on something and she was not too chatty, you got along well with minimal conversations and comfortable silence.
You grab a bowl, filling it to the brim with fresh soup and sat at their table across from her. Feeling content as you feel the soups warm and wholesome scent fill your senses, you glance around to see who else is sitting at the table. Eyes zeroing in on Sokka’s frame at the other end of the table, your breath instantly hitches. Suddenly your face feels as warm as your soup, and you want to kick yourself for letting yourself be so affected just by your incredibly short glance at him. Shifting your focus back to your soup you make the painfully obvious decision to focus all of your attention towards it, only listening to their interactions around you. You reminded yourself that you didn’t truly know him, only what everyone else has told you. You knew better than to let yourself become a total fool for the Watertribe boy without having any proper interactions with him. Hence, you’d be lying if you said you weren’t at the edge of your seat in anticipation to see Sokka joke around and tell stories with your friends. After all, that is what you were told about from the moment you met his father.
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Strumming my pain with his fingers (one time, one time) Singing my life with his words (two times, two times) Killing me softly with his song Killing me softly with his song Telling my whole life with his words Killing me softly with his song
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The excitement quickly dissipated when he began to dive into this evenings’ jokes and anecdotes.
“Guys! You wouldn’t believe it!! I was exploring the ship after training today, and I found all of these Fire Nation scrolls about their art and folktales in one of the rooms, and let me tell you, it’s a load of shit!”
As everyone laughed, you momentarily stopped breathing. Your entire being began to fold into itself, terrified at the prospect of him taking all of the things you favoured about your childhood and rip them to pieces.
Katara attempted to see the light in his statement. “Come on Sokka it can’t be that bad! I mean even the Watertribe has some questionable stories, I remember even the one Gran Gran told was a bit-“
“No, Katara! This is by far soooo much suckier than those stories. Okay, so there’s this one about dragons right? What happens is that there’s this Dragon Emperor who becomes bound to a mortal’s body by a Dark Water Spirit. So obviously! I was expecting this super cool battle or revenge plot, but in the end, they turned it into this lame love story where the Dragon Emperor falls in love with a mortal who turns out to be the Dragon Empress!”
“Aw I think that’s sweet! I mean surely there would have been a battle with the Dark Water Spirit so it wouldn’t have been a total loss?”
“Ugh, Katara! You don’t get it! It's just… sooooo oogie! They shouldn’t have done that. It should have been a story about battle, and warriors! I mean come on, that’s all the Fire Nation is good for right? Destruction and battle. So why did they have to ruin that story like that with all of that lovey stuff?! It just seems like nothing good can ever come out of the Fire Nation.”
Taking another mouthful of the soup, you kept your face downward as everyone laughed at Sokka’s exclamation of hatred for the nation you grew up in. No one knew where you grew up there except Hakoda, and you liked it that way. In complete fairness to you, it wasn’t your entire identity since your mother was from the Earth Kingdom, and you only spent the first seven years of your life there. But that didn’t mean it hurt any less when he tore apart the only things you dearly loved as a child.
Toph sensing your discomfort as you didn’t join in their amusement, she swiftly diverted the conversation into a new direction. While you were grateful, the thought of being in his presence any longer made you want to cry. It clearly didn’t work either as he continued to joke around about the food and other small things he picked up about the nation throughout their journey. Silently finishing up, you didn’t say a word or even give a half-hearted smile as they all laughed. Placing your bowl in the sink, you headed straight to your room.
The actions made everyone at the table confused, yet no one spoke out about it. Afterall, no one really knew you personally, nor did they understand what caused you to cut your interaction with them so short. Sokka himself became particularly curious. Afterall just like you, he heard many great things about you from his father, admiring your kindness and work ethic from afar. So, to say he wasn’t hurt that you chose not to stay longer or even crack a genuine smile, would be a lie.
Making it to your room, you took out any piece of paper or a scroll you used for your plans and began to pour out your pain onto to pages until you passed out from exhaustion. Not caring what contents were on the other side, you allowed yourself to be unfiltered.
You knew Sokka didn’t mean any harm; everyone laughed. He became the light you oh so desired to witness for yourself. Deep down, you knew you would have laughed too if it weren’t for the fact that he took the few happy memories you had with your father and set it on fire. A fire that produced the light you wished to see… but it seemed it wasn’t in the right way you hoped for.
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I felt all flushed with fever, embarrassed by the crowd I felt he'd found my letters and read each one out loud I prayed that he would finish, but he just kept right on
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You sighed as you finally finished fixing the pipes in the lower decks of the ship, once again tired and done with today’s work, you went to the mess hall for a late dinner.
“Hey Hakoda, I finished the plumbing problem so no one on the second floor should have any troubles now.”
“Thanks, y/n! You really are such a valuable person in this team. You’re always making sure everything is up and running.”
“Of course! What would you do without me? After all, let’s not forget how I spend my free time with your invasion plans.” You joked.
Turning your back to him to scoop some food onto your plate, he spoke up from behind you. “Oh right! That reminds me, I mentioned your ideas to Sokka earlier, and he seemed to really like them! But Sokka being Sokka, he got so excited over them and asked so many questions I didn’t even know how to respond. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know he’s probably at your desk analysing all of your scrolls right now. That kid never seems to be able to contain his excitement.”
“Yeah, that’s oka-“abruptly, you dropped your plate as your brain processed the information. If he was looking at your plans, then that meant……
Not even giving the Watertribe chief another glace or end to your response, you ran. Taking the fastest route to your room, everything in your mind and your surroundings became blurred, and you became hyper-focused on the fact that Sokka probably found what you wrote about him. Desperately trying not to cry as you bumped into people in the hallways, you couldn’t think of anything worse to happen in this very moment. The very idea of him knowing how you felt about him as well as how his words affected you made you want to scream. Maybe if you got there in time, he wouldn’t have read enough to understand your feelings fully. But when you bust through your door, it was too late. Sokka stood near your desk, with all the scrolls you ever wrote on scattered around the room. Some lay on your bed, the floor, across the desk, and even one in his hands.
“M- my dad said that you had a lot of perfect ideas for the invasion. B- but I- I found… I never thought…” His eyes never met yours as he continued to read the current scroll in his hands.
You slowly approached him, not caring as you walked over every word you wrote on the floor. “Sokka…” You silently begged him to stop reading, unsure of its contents.
He kept reading clearly in shock at the words before him, “why didn’t you s-say something?”
You sighed, somewhat unsure of how to approach the situation. “It’s not my place –“
He threw the scroll to the ground, finally looking up at you with bloodshot eyes as tears streamed down his face. “WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT’S NOT YOUR PLACE Y/N! It is your place! You had… no, you HAVE every right to say something! You sat there that night as I picked away at every single thing you ever loved, and you didn’t say a thing! Why would you let me do that to you!” Sobs wracked his body, falling to his knees in front of you. Torn apart on the inside about how much he hurt you. He never wanted this to happen, not just because of his small crush on you- that didn’t matter at this very moment. The very idea that he hurt someone who was so kind and selfless as a person, ruined him.
Beginning to feel immensely guilty for his current state, you knelt down to his level. Placing your hands to his wrists, you gently moved his hands away from his face. “Sokka… hey, Sokka look at me…”
As he looked at you, you struggled to keep your composure as tears began to fill your own eyes.
“It’s okay. What you said hurt, I don’t need to explain that for you to know it. Even though it felt like a small dig into who I am as a person and what I grew up to love, it’s true. What the Fire Nation did, what they are doing is awful, but I can’t speak up to defend them. I am in many ways apart of them. I grew up there, I celebrated their holidays, cooked and ate their food, and read their folktales. As much as I hate what the words ‘Fire Nation’ symbolises to the rest of the world, to you, it’s a part of who I am. No one can take that away from me, not even myself. Despite how much it hurt me, I can’t get mad at you or anyone because your feelings, and everything you said, is valid.” Moving his arms out of your grasp, he wrapped himself around you, holding you close to his chest.
“I’m so sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve to hear that, you’re amazing y/n. You deserve to be treated with the kindness and love you give to everyone on this ship. I’m sorry. I was wrong. I’m going to be better, I promise. I promise.” Overcome with emotion, the tears you tried so hard to hold back burst at his words.
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Strumming my pain with his fingers (one time, one time) Singing my life with his words (two times, two times) Killing me softly with his song Killing me softly with his song Telling my whole life with his words Killing me softly with his song
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Neither you nor Sokka bothered to move from your intertwined embrace on the floor of your room. You were both a sobbing, crying mess. The pain from both of you suffocated the air around you as you cling onto one another for forgiveness.
Forgiveness for being from the very place that caused him so much pain.
Forgiveness for being unable to embrace so much of who you are.
The pain was unrelenting as he weaved his fingers through your hair, shifting so your noses’ and foreheads against one another as he whispered words begging for forgiveness. Wishing, praying, to the Spirits he could take it all away. Sokka’s heart burns from the raging pain that has awoken inside of him. He doesn’t stop running his fingers through your hair almost as if he can stroke away the broken pieces inside of you, looking for new ones underneath so he can start again. Because despite his resentment for where you came from, he knows that to him, you are like a divine angel. You both have your own complex and conflicting backgrounds of life, but he has a desperate desire to care for you in a way he will never be able to explain.
You wanted to lie to him. Say it didn’t hurt, say you could forget. You could do it easily, but you wouldn’t. Knowing you both suffered enough, you didn’t want to do something that could potentially cause each other more pain. This was enough. As you both continued to cry, holding one another with his hands still in your hair, you leant back slightly, bringing a shaky, tender hand to his cheek.
Looking up into his eyes, it’s awfully evident how much pain swims in his beautiful shades of blue. Yet, there seems to be an unspoken understanding as you see a small glimmer behind all the tears. The light you have been yearning for. He sees it in your eyes too. Neither of you can change or take back what’s already been said, but in this very moment there’s hope. You know you can move forward and heal together.
“We’re going to be okay.”
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A/N: hi friends!! I hope you liked this one 😊
TO THE TAGLIST: hi all! i was a bit torn on what to do here because i wasn’t sure if you all only wanted to be tagged in my zuko series or my other works as well?? so im so sorry if you didn’t want to be tagged in this so please just let me know if you’d only like to be on the list for the series, zuko, sokka or other characters in general :)
TAGLIST: @slythergirlimagines​​ @mangoberry43​​ @eridanuswave​​ @whiskeywinter89​​​ @kaylove12​​ @simplyfandomish​​ @khaleesi-of-assassins​ @callums-keith​ @ilovespideyyy​ @calciumcow​ @blackhood5sos​ @nnon-it-up​
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hold-me-sickfics · 4 years
Text
Taehyung x Yoongi “Experience is the best Teacher”
Hi guys! Sooooo I was in the mood to write and thanks to @thatoneemokpop-02 I got inspired 😁 here’s an mpreg fic based on a prompt Alex gave me last night! Hope y’all enjoy!
TW: food, mpreg, birth scene, anxiety, emeto (if there are any more please let me know!)
“Taehyungie, baby, I don’t know if we can fit all this in the car…” Yoongi eyed the ENTIRE STORE, watching nervously as Taehyung ran around pointing to various things he wanted. The nursery was Taehyung’s main focus right now, and Yoongi was sure it was because he was nervous about the baby coming soon. However, if it numbed Taehyung’s nerves, Yoongi was all in for it.
“Yoongi it’s not like I’m gonna buy the whole thing. Just a couple things if we really need them.”
Taehyung smiled as he looked through all the bottles that the store had to offer.
“Can we get these? They’re so cute!” Taehyung giggled, causing his tummy to bounce up and down. Yoongi swore it was the cutest thing he’d ever seen in his entire life.
“Babe we bought those last week, didn’t we?” Yoongi put them back on the shelf.
Taehyung picked them back up.
“No, those were the blue ones. These are yellow.”
Yoongi had to admit, he had a point.
“Alright, we can get them. But these are the last bottles okay? If we get any more, I’m gonna have to build another cabinet.” Yoongi chuckled, Taehyung’s beaming smile making him feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside.
“Deal.” Taehyung reached over into the buggy, keeping one hand on his tummy so it wouldn’t be pressed into by the metal siding.
“Ready to go? I’ll get you your favorite.” Yoongi couldn’t help himself, spoiling Taehyung was his guilty pleasure. It had been ever since he’d started dating him.
“Ugh Yoongi I’m already fat.” Taehyung looked down at his tummy, palming it just a bit. His mood swings were no problem for Yoongi, being as he knew exactly how to handle them.
Yoongi and Taehyung were behind a shelf, giving Yoongi a perfect shot (Taehyung hated physical affection with other people watching, so Yoongi was always mindful of it.)
Yoongi took Taehyung’s hand and gently kissed it.
“You’re beautiful, and I don’t care if your scale says that you’ve gained a little. Honestly, I can’t get my mind off of you when you’re doing your little waddle. It’s kinda sexy.” Yoongi winked at him. Taehyung couldn’t help but laugh.
“Min Yoongi you have lost it.”
“Mhmmm,” he kissed his head. “Now, don't fight me on this. Baby wants chicken strips. Does daddy want chicken strips?”
Taehyung felt his face turn completely red.
“... maybe a little…”
“I thought so.” Yoongi winked at him, and squeezed his hand. “Let’s go pay for these and then we’ll go get supper.”
“Ahhhagghhhh!” Taehyung’s smile quickly changed into a pained grimace as he rubbed his back. Yoongi was holding him in less than a second.
“What happened? Are you okay?” The worry in Yoongi’s voice couldn’t be clearer.
“I- I’m okay. He kicked and punched me at the same time. It hit my back. Agh it hurts…” Taehyung had tears in his eyes, but used his breathing techniques from his classes to calm himself down.
Yoongi’s eyes were filled with sympathy, wishing he could take Taehyung’s pain away. All he could do was to hold him, and copy his breathing pattern to keep him focused. Soon enough, Taehyung was back able to walk, and they bought the bottles and went out to the car.
Unfortunately, the kick managed to knock Taehyung’s appetite off. Yoongi begged him to eat, but the mere thought of food made him consider asking Yoongi to pull over so he could throw up.
When they got home, Yoongi helped Taehyung change clothes, and then assisted him in getting into bed. (It used to be easy, but with all the extra tummy weight, he had trouble balancing to raise his leg up.)
“I’ll be right back okay angel? I’m just gonna run to the bathroom real quick.” Yoongi kissed Taehyung’s cheek, and then swept his hair back.
Yoongi went and did his business, but the whole time he was thinking of how he could help Taehyung get through these last few weeks before the baby came. He hated it, but Taehyung was going to be nervous and feel bad no matter what he said. All he could do was support him. Still, he did feel like if he could experience what Taehyung was going through… maybe he could help more.
By the time he got back to the bedroom, Taehyung was already fast asleep. Yoongi took his usual position, big spoon for his beautiful boyfriend. His arm was wrapped around his midsection, right above his stomach. He felt the baby kick a bit, and smiled knowing the little one would be here soon.
Little did he know, he was in for a heck of an awakening…
----
Yoongi woke up to a sickening feeling in the back of his throat. He tossed the covers aside as he felt a stream of vomit coming up his throat. He was out of time. Next thing he knew, he was spilling the remnants of his dinner into the floor below him. Taehyung was awake almost instantly.
“You’re okay baby. Just get it up, I’ll clean it up in a minute.” Yoongi felt Taehyung’s hand rub up and down his back. Goodness he was so sore. It was like he’d been thrown up against a wall and beaten up. Everything hurt, and his stomach being so big and bloated didn’t help either. It made it hard to move. Why on earth was it so heavy? WAIT-
Yoongi looked at his stomach, and puked again. Taehyung actually had to catch him to keep him from falling off the side of the bed.
“T-Tae-Taehyung my stomach-”
Taehyung was behind him, eyes wider than saucers.
“Yoongi… Mine…” He looked down at his sculpted stomach, abs just as firm as they were before pregnancy.
“Oh heck-” Yoongi leaned over, puking again. Every heave wrecked his frame, and strained his insides. Now that he registered what was happening, he could feel the baby moving. Each kick and punch and stretch just made him feel worse.
After a couple minutes, Yoongi was left coughing and dry heaving. Taehyung kissed his crown, smoothing his hair down.
“I’m gonna come around to the other side and get you okay? Keep your eyes closed. It’ll help you not feel as sick.”
Yoongi nodded, one hand on his now, very large stomach. He clenched his eyes shut, wishing he could do the same for his nose.
He heard Taehyung putting a towel down on the floor to cover the puke. Then he felt Taehyung’s hands around him, helping him up gently.
“It’s gonna be harder to get up, just put your weight on me alright?”
“T-Taehyung I’m gonna puke again-” Yoongi dry heaved, the sound even causing Taehyung to wince. He knew that had to hurt Yoongi’s throat.
“You’re empty baby. It’s just the smell. Trust me, I would know. I was the pregnant one like four hours ago.”
Yoongi gagged again, feeling his knees go weak and nearly collapsing under him.
“Help me” Yoongi cried, tears rushing down his face.
“I’ve got you Yoongi I promise I won’t let you fall. Just keep your arms around me alright?”
Yoongi nodded, but kept shaking, knowing at any moment something else could happen. He had no idea being pregnant was this terrifying.
“Breathe Yoongi. Hey, focus on my voice. What do you hear me saying?”
“T-To b-bre-breathe.”
“That’s right. Now we’re gonna go take a bath and get you clean. The water will help with the cramping I promise you.”
“Mmmmmmnnnnn” Yoongi shuddered.
“What did I tell you just then baby?”
“W-water h-helps…”
“That’s good. Now sit down right here for me okay?”
Yoongi opened his eyes, shocked to realize that Taehyung had actually distracted him and helped him walk to the bathroom.
Taehyung leaned him down, feeling his own heart break at how pitiful Yoongi looked. He turned on the faucet, and added in some of his own lavender bubble bath soap.
“Taehy-hyung?”
“What’s happening baby?”
“B-baby’s moving-g. H-hurts…”
“I know it does. Here…” Taehyung ran a washcloth under the water. He started to wipe the sweat from Yoongi’s face and neck.
Yoongi moaned in comfort.
“There you go. That’s good baby.” Taehyung continued until the bath had filled up midway.
“Alright…” Taehyung kissed Yoongi’s rounded cheek, adoring the extra bit of baby-weight that pregnancy had added to him. “I’m gonna help you get undressed. Can you lift your arms for me?”
“Y-yeah.” Yoongi couldn’t think of anything except how scared he felt.
Taehyung slid his shirt off, slightly palming Yoongi’s stomach in the places that he could see the baby moving.
“Ahhhahhh,” Yoongi let out a half moan, half cry.
“I know baby. Believe me, I know.”
Taehyung got ready to take his husband’s pants off, helping him up off of the toilet slowly. Yoongi wrapped his arms around Taehyung’s neck, and just held onto him. Nonverbally begging for some of his strength.
“Taehyung… I- I-”
“It’s alright baby. I promise it’s not this bad all the time. Some nights are worse than others.” Taehyung lightly kissed the boy’s ear, holding him close.
“Ahhhhhhhahhhgggggh Taehyung I gotta lay down… S-something’s w-wrong…”
Taehyung’s eyes widened in shock… for some reason… a splatter of water had just hit the floor.
“Ahhhhaggghhhh hmmmmm…” Yoongi’s legs were trembling. Taehyung laid Yoongi down on the rug, thankfully they’d chosen a soft one when they’d decorated.
“Okay baby let me see-”
“N-no- no no, I can’t… I don’t w-want to…”
Taehyung felt his blood run cold. He had a really bad feeling about this.
“Just let me look. I won’t touch anything. I promise.”
Yoongi’s legs opened on their own, so it didn’t really matter whether Yoongi wanted him to see or not. What Taehyung saw was probably the worst thing he could have seen, or at least close.
“Alright baby I don’t know how but, you’re fully dilated…”
Yoongi cried, screaming in pain. Suddenly, it felt like everything had just crashed down on him.
“I- I c-can’t- p-lease…” Yoongi pushed involuntarily, feeling pressure and more pain than he’d ever experienced.
Taehyung saw Yoongi’s stomach tense up as he pushed down.
“Okay hey, look at me, look at me baby.” Taehyung’s voice was calming. The only bit of comfort he had in the whole situation.
Yoongi opened his eyes, and looked straight into Taehyung’s.
“I’m here. I’ve got you. Just push when you feel ready, okay?” Taehyung used his fingers to stretch Yoongi’s opening a bit, already able to see the baby’s head inside.
“Ugggggghhhhhhh” Yoongi threw his head back, his back arching in pain.
“You’re doing great. Yoongi I can see him already!” Taehyung smiled, tears filling his eyes.
Yoongi felt the urge to push, but wouldn’t.
“Baby I know you’re scared. Just do what you need to do. Your body is gonna show you how to. It’s gonna be alright, I promise.”
Yoongi felt a sharp pain erupt in his lower stomach.
“Taehyung hold me!” Yoongi stretched both his arms out to reach for Taehyung.
“I’m here baby. I’m right here. Just wake up.”
Yoongi was beyond confused.
“Everything is going to be alright. I’m right here with you. Open your eyes.”
Yoongi felt another intense pain inside of him, and he pushed.
“Yoongi you gotta wake up!”
Yoongi woke up, gasping. His entire body covered with sweat.
“T-Taehyung?”
Yoongi’s heartbeat was so loud he could barely hear Taehyung trying to soothe him.
“I’m here baby. I’m here.” Taehyung kissed his shoulder, unable to hold him due to the size of his stomach.
Yoongi immediately reached down and felt his stomach, then down to his privates. He was back to normal. He wasn’t pregnant, and moreover, he wasn’t giving birth.
“What happened?” Taehyung rubbed Yoongi’s arm.
“I-” Yoongi decided there was only one way for him to explain it.
“Taehyung, I’ll be right back okay? I’ve gotta run and get something from the store.”
“You are not telling me you had a nightmare because we’re out of milk.”
“I’m not, but there’s something I gotta do. I’ll be back in 30 I promise okay?”
Taehyung reluctantly said yes, and Yoongi threw on some clothes.
He made a quick job of his mission. Fluffy socks, 3 dozen roses, a bath bomb, as much candy as he could grab in one go, and Taehyung’s favorite from McDonald’s since they were the only ones open. Oh, and the milk. He couldn’t forget the milk.
He got home to see Taehyung waddling around the kitchen, making a mental list of things he had to do today since it wasn’t likely he was going back to sleep. He heard the door close, and turned around to see Yoongi crying.
Yoongi dropped everything and rushed to him, hugging him and half blubbering into his neck.
“You are beautiful and I love you so much and everything is going to be okay I promise. I’m gonna make sure you have the best doctors and the best of everything in the nursery, and I’m gonna build you that other cabinet for the bottles. I’ll start at 6:00, because Lowe’s doesn’t open until then but I’ll be there when the door opens. Anything you want, you just tell me. Anything. I don’t care what time it is or what else I’ve been doing that day or whatever. Anything you need is yours. And on top of that, I’m giving you a massage right now so don’t try and stop me.”
He swept Taehyung off his feet, barely able to see his path due to the size of Taehyung’s stomach. He got him to the bedroom and immediately turned the lights down and grabbed the lotion.
“You rest and let me do this. Want me to turn on the music?”
“Babe… are you okay?”
“Just work with me. Pregnancy makes you emotional.”
Taehyung didn’t question it, and just smiled at how cute his husband was being. He knew there were things he could say to thank Yoongi, but it seemed that right now the biggest thank you would be to go back to sleep and show him that his massage helped comfort him. He did promise himself to get more into detail about that dream in the morning though.
The end
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Text
Those Shoes (Ch.1)
Notes: The title is referenced to a song by The Eagles, it’s a classic song about exotic dancers, as well as a popular song to play in the clubs. Rita, or @youtubequeens and I brainstormed this piece, and I was so excited to finally write it :3
Warnings: Language, Exotic Dancers and their life, talk about sex, Trigger Warnings!!!: Mentions of and non-consensual acts such as groping and touching, and other horrors.  
Notice: Dancers should be treated with respect, and this is not a fic to downgrade them, nor to spread false truths. It sheds light on what can and does happen in real life, and how that it can be a dangerous job. The warnings are here for a reason. Thank You.
 “Honey, I neeeeed your help!” Your mother whined through the phone. You sighed loudly as you sat on the bed. You’ve just finished with a hefty amount of homework, two tests, and you had another coming up, soon. Not only were your friends squealing that they need to celebrate your upcoming graduation, but your mother had called you, needing something. Again.
“Before you hang up!” She started as your thumb hovered over the red button. “I know that you’ll be graduating college, soon, and you’re needing a job, asap, sooooo, I was wondering if I could hire you, soon?” She baited, and you felt a chill of dread down your spine.
“No way in hell.”
“Oh, Come on! You know that you’ll need a job! I can’t find decent hire, anywhere. How about I hire you until you find a better job? Please? These outfits need to be patched up, and I need makeup expertise! Other than my own!” She added.
You felt your stubborn nature wilt as common sense pile drove in. Your mother was a crafty, sneaky, snake, and she knew that you were needing money to make end’s meet, especially when you were about to move to a better apartment. There were good businesses waiting to hire, and some even were willing to sponsor you, but of course it could take months until you could officially land a good job.
Unfortunately, your mother knew this.
“Above minimum wage, and I get to wear what I want.”
“Deal.” She didn’t even hesitate.
“Fine. I’ve got tests…and the girls are throwing me a surprise party, of all things at the end of the month, so I’ll see you when I see you.” You breathed out, and your mom giggled.
“Oh, a surprise party? Maybe I could send-”
“Mom, no.” You blurted out, and she laughed.
“Oh, my baby girl!” She cooed. “You don’t need physical experience to enjoy-”
You clicked the red dial, ending the call as you sighed with defeat. How did your life turn out like this?  More than likely, she’ll gather your small group of friends and convince them to try to get you to loosen up. It was not only your graduation day, but also your birthday, coming up.
 Your mind froze with fear at the memories of past birthdays. After you’ve turned eighteen, she tried multiple times to send out one of the male dancers, scantily dressed in an ice cream sundae uniform, holding a card that basically said “to pop your cherry”.    
Yeah, you didn’t really had any contact with her, really.
…………………
“Surprise! Happy Graduation and Birthday, Girl!” Your friends screamed with joy as you entered your apartment. Finally. After years of hard work and several job offers that will get back to you within a month, you were a certified beautician with a knack to patch and design clothes. Sure, it wasn’t your first idea of a job, but it grew on you. Dying hair, painting nails, mastering different techniques of applying makeup, and seeing the sparkly eyes of your patients as they admired your hard work, had won you over.
Of course, your mother had a major influence over you. Although you weren’t into dancing, you were happy to practice makeup and help patch up certain outfits. As you grew older, you went with what you knew, and soon, your school had paid for your college due to your good grades, and you made your way up, ever since.
“Oh hey, girls! Where��s the cake?” You wondered, and they wasted no time with mischievous giggles. You stilled.
“What-”
“Don’t worry, Babe! It’ll be here, soon. Try this cucumber Sake!” Rumi grinned as she held out the small cup. The white-haired woman had been your friend since late high school, the only one knowing about your mother’s business back then. She and your other friend, Keigo, had now opened up a pet store. Said man who had bird-like perception wasn’t here, right now, but your more…flirtatious friend, Nemuri, was here with her girlfriend and your attention-seeking friend, Yu. Both girls had worked for your mother, and although you were close, you were weary of their similar antics.
“You’re hiding something.” Your eyebrows furrowed. Nemuri smiled coyly as she slung an arm around a giggling Yu.
“It wouldn’t be called a surprise if we weren’t.”  
“True.”
The four of you had cut up and were laid back, enjoying small talk and stories that you all missed out on. Nemuri and Yu were doing great with the future wedding funds, Rumi had admitted that Keigo was trying his best to win over some goth from Hot Topic, and you, well, you were still doing the things that you loved to do, despite a busy schedule. Rumi smiled, knowing fully well that your more secretive hobbies had leaned towards being more humanitarian, despite your busy schedule.
You wanted to do things that you wanted to do, not gain attention from them, yet your close group of friends had known of your little skits: Feeding not only stray cats, but taking time to volunteer to help with the homeless and the orphanage. The conversation had quickly turned to about working at the strip club, and you were relieved that the subject had changed.
“Ugh. I hate it when they get up. They’re suppose to sit, and be obedient.” Nemuri huffed.
“Isn’t that against the regulations?” You wondered, and Yu nodded.
“Yeah. I heard that one girl in the private room was far into her dancing, she didn’t notice the guy standing up. Luckily there’s cameras, and so when the staff noticed that he pulled his dick out, they broke into the room and threw him out. Hah, he didn’t get his cash back or anything.” She finished, and you couldn’t help but feel sympathy.
You weren’t raised in the club, but your mother had told you plenty of stories, and dropped off the outfits or brought home a “dummy” to practice makeup on while she told you to never let your guard down. It wasn’t until you were nineteen when you fully knew what she had meant as you were working as a hostess at her building.
Although you were dressed in bartender clothes, it didn’t stop anybody from trying to make a grab at you. You were lucky that your mother had hired good bouncers, and she herself was like a tiger who prowled upon those who didn’t belong there.  
“That’s awful.” You admitted, and Nemuri nodded in agreement.
“Yeah. It’s especially gross when you’re giving them a lap dance, and you feel something gross and sticky on the back of your thigh.”
“Or when they kept saying that ‘you’re too pretty to work here’. I know I’m pretty, and I want the attention and attraction to work here. Just because I dance, doesn’t mean that I’m easy. I’m in a committed relationship for six years, thank you.” Yu bantered back while Rumi and you listened quietly.
“You girls go through a lot. Damn. Poor birthday girl had to wear a miniskirt while handing out food and drinks.” Rumi piped up, offering to say what she knew about the subject. Nemuri sighed.
“I remember that when Yu and I first started. Her mom’s not too picky when it comes to help, especially when it’s low pay and her own kid. Like a lamb in a den full of lions, I tell you. Luckily our ladies and gents knew how to swoop in to the rescue.” She finished, and you felt yourself blushing.
Everyone jumped as the doorbell rang, and you watched the Grinch-like grins spread on Nemuri and Yu’s faces, as Rumi let out one that was almost feral.
“Cake’s here.” They said, and you couldn’t help but feel a case of dread as Nemuri didn’t hesitate to waltz over there, and sling the door open, and you couldn’t help but to swallow thickly.
“You did not.” It was a whisper that died on your throat.
Of course you should have known. Of all things-
 He stood in the middle of the door, holding a prettily frosted cake, but it wasn’t the cake that caught your attention.
 Tall, blond, muscles, was sporting thin square glasses that were about to fall off of his nose, a sleeveless white vest with a loosened tie and one button undone. His pants were no better, the zipper and buttons were undone as it snagged nicely on his hips, leaving a blond treasure trail for the world to see, and of course, sleek black and orange high heels that looked as if they cost more than your rent.  
“I’m here to teach our Birthday Girl a lil’ lesson.” Came out the smooth purr as he twirled a red sucker in his mouth, and damn it did that not help you. You hated to admit it, but he was the handsomest ones that you’ve ever seen, and of course you knew who sent him. Pretty amber irises stared at you, drinking you thoroughly as if he was silently contemplating something.  
“Name’s Fatigue, Sugar.” He grinned, lolling the sucker within his mouth as Nemuri took the cake from his hands and set it down on your living room table.  
“Don’t work our girl too hard, Tai. Poor thing gets a little flustered, easily.” She giggled, pinching your cheek rather playfully. You gave her a small glare despite that your ears were burning, now. Tai, or “Fatigue”, let a slow, lazy smile stretch his face as he looked down at you with a cocky look mixed with hunger.
“Jus’ sit back an’ relax, ‘nd enjoy the show. You deserve it for workin’ so hard.”  He cooed with what seemed to be affection, and you swallowed thickly and nodded. Sure, you could do this. Giving an affirmative, he didn’t give you much time before he took out his phone and pressed some button, instantly music had started playing as he started.
He was like a magnet, snapping your attention to him in awe as he spread his legs wide, letting himself sink low to the floor, heels perfectly grounded into your carpet as his glasses stayed neatly perched on the crook of his nose. He grinned at your amazed stare, as if eating it up. Of course he had a bag full of tricks, and you couldn’t believe that you were finding yourself eager to know each one.
He didn’t fail to deliver, hopping back up with a dive of his hips, sliding a hand down to the side of his pants, palming his thigh as he bent low, ass in the air. Each movement was in sync with the beats, and was absolutely filthy as he used his body to curve and twist into movements that oddly made you feel hot and your throat dry. Who was he? Where did your mom even find somebody this good?
Your friends were no better. Rumi had sported a look of stupor, and to your own surprise, Nemuri and Yu looked impressed, a rare sight for you knew that their technique was high dollar and quality, too.
He was all over you, not touching, but close, not letting you take your attention away from him as he ran his hands close to his hips and inner thighs, his sharp focus was only on you as he gauged your reactions, seeing which little movements brought a spark to your eyes or a flush to your face.
Then, like his routine, he did another unexpected move. Taking your cake, he set it neatly on your lap. Not giving you time to really question anything, he gingerly took your hand, dipping your fingers into the frosting, and brought it to his mouth.
Hot. You couldn’t help but feel hot all over as your lips burned on how he licked and sucked at the frosted digits, lolling his tongue over each one as he gave you such a dirty, heated look, and you swore that you heard him groan. Or was it you? You couldn’t tell as he gave your digits one final suck, letting go with a wet pop as the last song ended.
“Delicious.” He purred, and you couldn’t help but bite your bottom lip at how he sounded it.
“Holy shit.” Nemuri broke the silence.
“Language, young Missy.” Fatigue tutted, waving his finger at her, laughing lightly as she gave him one of her own, before turning his attention back to you.
“Didja enjoy the dance, Sweetling?”
“Yeah.” You admitted in  choked voice, and he gave a small laugh of affection as he walked towards the door.
“You have a Happy Birthday. I do hope that I can see ya, again.” He gave one last final look at you that you couldn’t decipher, as he headed out.
Silence enveloped you girls, before Yu started laughing.
“You were so blushing! He looked as if he wanted to eat you up!” She noticed, and you could feel your lip starting to hurt from biting it constantly.
“Woah, did he even know that you’re the boss’s kid?” Rumi asked, and Nemuri shook her head.
“Nah. We hired him yesterday, and her mom didn’t say anything, other than that she had a very special job for him. Heh, I didn’t know that the new meat was this good.” Nemuri explained, staring at her nails.
“’I do hope that I can see ya, again’.” Yu mimicked before giggling with glee. “Somebody’s has taken a shine to our homebody.” She grinned and your face flushed with realization.
“I gotta go see my mom.” You blurted out, instead, and was rewarded with grins and knowing smirks.
“It’s so cute how you’ve finally began to open up, my little touch-starved Chickadee. A stripper, of all things, huh?” Nemuri laughed at the irony, and you couldn’t help but join.
“I guess that it’s time to admit that I don’t have to live my life as the Lone Wolf, anymore.”
“And finally get laid, right?” Yu said it ever so casually, and you rolled your eyes.
“Ah, leave her alone. It’s nice that those brick walls are falling down.” Rumi grinned, slinging an arm around you and you smiled.
“It’s getting late, ladies. I got to see my mom early, tomorrow. Before you leave, take some cake with you.” You admitted.
“Will do! I’ll tell her that the new guy had done the impossible, by gaining your heated stare.” Yu giggled as she wrapped an arm around Nemuri’s waist.
“Hah, Kei’s gonna have a laugh at this.” Rumi smiled as she got up, leaving for your kitchen to grab the plates and forks.
….………….
After cake was cut and eaten, and the girls hugged you and kissed your cheeks before heading out, you were now laying on your bed, face flushing furiously as your heartbeat quickened. A stripper of all things shouldn’t have done that to you. You grew up with your mom’s flirty attitude towards strangers, and from an older teen, had been working in the club in a vest, shirt, and miniskirt with low heels, being constantly flirted with.
You didn’t know what made him to be so different, but like a magnetic connection, you were pulled, and despite you loner, homebody attitude, you kind of did wanted to see more of him.
…………..
He sighed, slipping off the expensive shoes as his feet and body ached for a hot shower. She didn’t know him, but he knew somewhat about her. Although the two of them shared the same college, he’d never shared a class with her, and she had lived in the apartments that was near, but not the dorms. Yet, he seen her almost everyday while either to or from his way to classes, work, or in general.
She tried to hide it, but he knew of the little empty cans of tuna near the dumpster that kept the stray mother cat and her kittens fed, was from her. He could hear her cooing to this day, smile rivaling the sun, as she looked down at the bunch with a touch of softness, not noticing the world around her as he took the same route past the alley every day.
 Of course, he was a little intrigued. He had a sweet tooth, and despite his refusal in ever taking a bite, he wanted to drink in on what this strange woman was doing. He knew that she was busy, if the bags underneath her eyes indicated anything, and yet she still took time to do small and big things. Picking up littered cans and tossing them in the recycling bin, helping struggling students study, and he’d even seen her face at the soup kitchens, pouring generous amounts of soup into the bowls which were held in the hands of the hungry.  
All around. She was all around and yet tried to make herself small and trivial. Others didn’t really notice, but he did. He couldn’t help it. Like a little magnet, she pulled him in, and she was unaware of it. Honestly, he felt like a stalker, yet he knew that he wasn’t. She was just…all around. Existing, helping, laughing, and smiling. It cut through a crack in his dark little world.
Of course, then she graduated, and he was surprised on how much he had missed her laughter, the softness in her eyes as she handled the kittens or gave out food. He didn’t know her. Didn’t speak to her, never went to the same classes, and yet, he felt a little empty when she was gone. It boggled and irritated him.
The literal icing on top was when he had finally gotten hired, the smirking woman telling him that he had a special job, and he couldn’t help but look in surprise at the address. The same door number that he seen her excitedly rush out from while he was on his way to class, was written on the address sheet with instructions. He had already met her friends, who were surprising her on her birthday. To be honest, he was surprised that the woman had friends such as Nemuri and Yu, but he didn’t question it further, as he felt the excitement build up.
Then, he couldn’t help himself when the two of them had finally met. He suppressed a shiver. He had a no touching rule. He didn’t want to touch, and he didn’t want to be touched, but something broke in him. He wanted to be touched by those shy inquisitive fingers, wanted to be stared at so innocently, and yet so dirty, and he couldn’t help himself. She was so sweet, and he didn’t mind letting himself having a taste, for once.
He really did hope to see her again
…………  
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imaginethathaikyuu · 4 years
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How did I find your blog? I was looking for soft Kuroo content on google. And your soft birthday hc’s for him came up. And that’s also how I found tumblr
What was the first story of yours that I read? That Kuroo piece ^
Roughly, how long have I been following this blog? Well I found that piece shortly after it was posted so…. Around the beginning of December 2019 I think. Got a tumblr a few months later and you were the first person I followed (had you in my bookmarks bar before that! (still have you in my bookmarks bar and when I share my screen in classes there are occasionally questions. I ignore them))
What’s something I’ve noticed about you personality wise? You’re really clever and funny. But you’re also sweet. But because you’re clever you have no hesitation in setting up and enforcing your boundaries, and I really admire that strength and confidence.
Have we ever interacted, either by PM, ask, or in the comments? What was my perception of you? YES!!! PM, SOOOOO many asks, comments, and you sent me an ask. And reblogged it. And I cried. A lot. My perception: you’re lovely and I want to h*ld your h*nd ….please.
What’s my favorite story of yours? Oh how to choose. Firstly, I’m a nb, biracial, bisexual. Honey, I’ve never made a choice in my life. But let’s try here. Anything you’ve written for Tsukki. Literally all of it is gold. Fight me. I was going to write “especially [piece title]” but I LITERALLY CANNOT CHOOSE ONE. Your Bokuto nightmare piece. Your Kuroo angsty fight. Your Tendou dealing with S/O with parents who yell piece. Your Kinktobers. Your Futakuchi and Mattsun pieces. And your Terushima pieces. Ugh. I CANNOT CHOOSE. OH AND YOUR STREAMER KENMA!!!!!! OKay just… all of it. I can’t choose. I tried, and I failed, and I’m willing to admit failure.
What’s a story I’d love to see you write? I don’t want to say this… because it hurts me… but I just KNOW you’d write brilliant angst. Some of my fav pieces of yours are pained beginnings with happy endings. That fight with Tsukki after a bad day at work. The pieces I mentioned above (nightmare pieces and fighting pieces and angsty home life ha.. ha.ha.ha.). That Oikawa one where the reader wakes up in bed without him and thinks he left. You write these gorgeous atmospheres and descriptive, visceral feelings, and if you chose to use it for evil…. You could get evil shit done. You’re SO powerful. So I want to read it… but also…. I don’t. I’d love to see you write ABO like you mentioned a while back or just see you explore a cutesy soulmate AU or something. I think you’d be really good at writing an AU where you hear what the other person’s listening too. I feel like you’d be so good at making me feel something for someone who was in another city. (think this would be cute with Tsukki cos he’s headphones boy, OR terushima because I like the dynamic of someone flirty, who clearly cares about looks, falling for someone he can’t see) ANYWAY….
Favorite pairing you write for?/fav reader insert? Tsukishima x reader. It’s my fav self-ship. (but also Mattsun, Bokuto, Oikawa, Tanaka, and Akaashi because you write them SO WELL!!!!)
Have any of your stories helped me through a hard time? Of course. Your self-harm piece came at a time I needed it. Iwaizumi’s in particular saved my life. But also your Tendou dealing with S/O parents who fight… came right when I needed it. Also starting college… was hard.. And reading and rereading your fluff really pulled me through it.
Have any of your stories hit closer to home? YES (see above).
Do I genuinely like your blog, it’s aesthetic or posts? It’s overall feel? It’s content? Yes. The aesthetic is, ngl, a wee bit basic. But I kinda love that. And the feel? It feels like home. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Your blog is my safe space. So, yes, I love. It’s content? YES. OF COURSE. Your personality probably could have kept me here even if your content was kinda shit, but I follow you RELIGIOUSLY because of your content. So yes. I adore.
Is English my first language? Kinda??? I grew up in a trilingual household so I kinda learned three languages at the same time while growing up. But no, I don’t need to translate it in my head. Because English was one of the three.
Anything I want to share? Yes. Please keep being kind to yourself, caring for your mental health, enforcing your boundaries, loving Akaashi, and just generally being you. You’re so lovely as you are, and I hope you continue grow, but never change. Also I’m sorry about all your work stuff…. It literally makes me feel sick. And I hope you find a job where that’s not tolerated, or that your work finds a better way of protecting it’s employees. I know you know this, but none of it is your fault. I just hope things improve. AND I love you… a lot. And I’m so proud of you hitting 9K and you deserve so many more followers because your pieces are just... GORGEOUS. I can’t wait until I’m at Barnes and Noble in a few years and I can pick up a hardback copy of your debut novel. I’m so excited to say “I knew Em Akaashi (which is your legal name as far as I’m concerned) before she was so popular among the masses.”
so ive been trying to figure out the correct and worthy way to reply to this ask since the moment i got it......because its so fucking sweet and kind and amazing and pure and perfect and i just dont know how to use WORDS to explain the way it makes me feel so.......i will just reply in bullet points in regards to every question u answered to make it a lil easier :D
- the fact that u found my blog on google ....... like this may be odd and a very specific thing but before i made this blog i always hoped that 1 day my fanfic would pop up in google searches bc thats ALWAYS how i found fics when i was reading them religiously and i felt so much ENVY!!!!! LIKE I WANTED TO BE THERE I WANTED MY FICS TO B POPULAR ENOUGH TO POP UP ON GOOGLE.....that may sound very selfish but its true......so thats just very cool to me... :]
- u’ve been here for so long omg 🥺🥺🥺🥺 if anyone in ur classes ever asks jus promo my blog like its nbd 
- thats so sweet what 🥺🥺🥺 i try my best to advocate for myself and be confident for myself.....ive spent far too much of my time being silently uncomfortable because i was afraid of pushing someone’s buttons seeming rude.....but NO MORE!!!! i know what upsets me, i know my triggers, i know what i dislike experiencing, and im never gonna let myself be anxious or uncomfortable for someone else’s sake, esp if theyre being rude 2 me. i would say its less strength and confidence and moreso me attempting to take control of my anxiety in the places i can (aka on the Internet) bc i am SICK OF ANXIETY ATTACKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
- BBY no dont CRY!!!! im racking my brain trying to think of who u are i wanna know so bad so i can thank u personally for being the kindest person in the world n so i can send u more asks >:(........MY HAND IS URS TO HOLD!!!!! dont tell akaashi tho 
- OMG my TSUKKI pieces.....hes so hard to write why ;-; thank u so much im so glad u enjoy my works<3333
- NOT ANGST NOT LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!! pained beginnings to happy endings are my specialty.....IMAGINE me writing a sad ending like i CANT!!!!!!!!! ive only done it a few times and it is so Difficult.....YALL ARE SO LUCKY IM NOT EVIL!!!!!! ive had this idea for an angsty akaashi fic that i think about and write in my head every night before falling asleep and it Hurts and i wanna write it but i also can’t make myself :D ABO would be very fun but i genuinely do not know how to explore the concept while making it feel like it’s Written By Me.....u know what i mean? same with soulmate aus, i really dislike writing them because theyre just boring to me like they all feel the same everything’s been done for them.....which is FINE!!! but i write enough cliche stuff as it is HAHA, a long distance type soulmate au could be fun and interesting but ldr’s trigger me bc of a past relationship so </3 but hey maybe someone else could use the idea!!!!!
- gotta love tsukishima <3
- im rlly glad my writing could be there for you friend, one of the biggest reasons i write fanfic (and write the kind of fics i write) is bc i know firsthand how much reading sweet stories abt ur comfort characters can help u through the shittiest times - i just wanna offer ppl some support and happy feelings and love cuz sometimes fanfic is the only time we can find those things (and theres nothing shameful abt that either if anyone bullies u for reading fanfic i will fight them)
- I KNOW MY LAYOUT IS LAZY AND BASIC AS FUCK AND THAT IS BECAUSE I DO NOT GIVE A SHIT LMAOOOO so im glad u think its ok...... like i dont have the patience to create a fancy ass layout that actually works are u KIDDING ME??????? I COULD LITERALLY NEVER plus i kinda like that its just the basic kinda ugly boring default layout like it makes it simple and easy and i feel like it brings focus to the only thing on this blog that i care about which is my writing, i rlly only care about the content here and not aesthetics jdbljdabsdk that blue background will be there til i Die......i adore u more btw 
- WHOA trilingual what the hell ur so cool tell me more 
- you have my word, friend, that i will continue to do all of that so long as you do the same. take care of yourself, be kind to yourself - i know u can do it, ur so kind to others and u deserve to be kind to urself, too so this is the part that genuinely brought me to tears because *sappy dumb shit ahead* ok look ever since i can remember the one and only thing ive wanted to do with my life is become an author ...... dreams of book covers with my name written on them and words in pages written by me and fanart of my characters and going into my local bookstore n seeing my book there....these thoughts all haunt my fucking brain because i want it SO BAD!!!!!!!! so bad that it makes me CRY!!!!!!!! ive never wanted something more and just!!!!!!!!!!!! idk how much u meant that part but holy fuck!!!!!! i hope so bad that one day i can send u a free copy of my book as a thank u for being the person u are. u have all my love friend, every last bit of it <333333333
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seijorhi · 4 years
Text
asks :)
once again, i’m terrible at answering things :)
First off, your newest Kuroo story WRECKED ME. OMMMMMG LIKE IT'S SOOO FUCKING GOOD. You are one of the most incredible writers ever, like professional style writing. These should be books and you should get paid for it, honestly. Your skill is totally unmatched, my friend. I just adore everything you write. I had two questions thou about the story, just because I am totally obsessed by it- so has Kuroo been obsessed with her since he saw her, I'm like curious how his obsession started 
like is it because she's young and he's interested? Cuz I totally got the vibes at the party that he was showing her off like she was his girlfriend and he seems like he has been wanting her for awhile. I was just curious about how it started cuz god I'm a simp for yandere kuroo- boss man Kuroo would make me weakkkkk. My second question is so is he like obsessively in love with her or is it like just a this hot piece of ass is mine to fuck kinda thing? Like does he want a relationship?
anyways, I love you and I love your writing. Everything you write is legit perfection! Thank you for all your beautiful stories you share with us! - Kai
first of all, whomst gave you the right to be so damn sweet???!?! dsgsjkl thank you, bby!
so, like with all my fics i kind of have a ‘read into it how you want’ thing going for it. whether or not kuroo actually has ‘romantic’ (i use that word loosely) feelings for the reader or whether he just enjoys fucking her because he’s in a position of power and she’s easily manipulated is left a little up to your interpretation and how you’d prefer to imagine it. however, having said that there are little hints throughout the fic that imply that there’s a little more depth to kuroo’s feelings. you’re not wrong with the whole ‘showing her off’ vibe at the party, and there’s mentions of confessions that kuroo gives while he’s fucking the reader - also the title of the fic, invidia, means envy in latin. so take that how you will 🤷‍♀️
and as far as how it all began, i like to think that it was kind of a slow build. again it’s implied that kuroo has met the reader (however briefly) a few times before - at games as nekoma’s manager, when she initially was introduced as his girlfriend and she has stayed over at their place in the past. it wasn’t so much a singular moment, but kuroo’s definitely been paying more attention to her than she realises. 
WHAT WHAT WHAT???? RHI UHMMM WAS KUROO IN LOVE WITH THE READER???? 👀👀👀👀 HOLY SHIT. I'm honestly mind blown rn like I have a lot of questions like did Shin know? Was he also into it? Omg the idea of Father and Son sharing reader...
(also I def did not hope that Bokuto was also there cuz that would have be fun....oppsss)🙊
hehehe
no, shin didn’t know but oh can you imagine the betrayal if he did? if he willingly set up the reader to be fucked by his dad 👀god damn
adsfgdhjfkfl there was a moment i genuinely considered having something more happen at the christmas party where bo would stumble across and one thing would lead to another.... but i decided not to go that route. this one needed to be solo kuroo haha
Rhi, what can I say, amazing as always!
ahhh thank you sm, bby!
Hi i absolutely love the kuroo fic at first no one would actually notice he was into and then story actually rises nicely however i would like to ask like what happens later im sorry im a little burnt out from my mountains of assignments that i cant think of a possible aftermath since the story had an open ending but yeah what happens later after the whole scene does y/n stay there for the 7 days and get r*ped again or she goes home early and like what happens to kuroo and shinsuke im sorry for annoying you with questions its fully up to you whether u would like to answer or not :-)
aw, thank you! I hope your assignments and stuff are all done? And pls bby, you’re not annoying me at all 💕💕💕
Honestly again, it’s kind of left up to what you like to think would happen, but personally I think that the reader stays, because there’s no easy way to get out of that situation without raising suspicion - which means that she then has to spend the next week trying unwittingly playing cat and mouse with Kuroo who’s gonna use every damn opportunity he has to push your boundaries 👀
Duuuuude invidia fucked me up! Like fuck, lol! The build up was so spectacular! It makes me wonder two things: how did kuroo’s obsession start, and what would shin have done if he caught them (and why do I feel like he’d join in... I guess it runs in the family lol).
I loved it sooooo much and im also so creeped out lol. Can’t trust other people’s dads. Everything about it was perfect!
glad you liked it, bby!!
shin’s a good boy and he genuinely loves the reader, but i think if he did stumble across the two of them he’d just shut down and walk away. it’d be the biggest betrayal in his eyes - it wouldn’t matter if you were drunk or he was, who came onto who - the two most important people in his life going behind his back would just break him :( and i think he probably wouldn’t give either of them a chance to explain
but if we’re talking degenerate shin... 👀👉👈
imagine if invidia! reader gets pregnant and Shin thinks it’s his, but its actually his dad’s 🤭
oooh kuroo would be such a smug little shit - he’d get extra touchy feely with the reader, drop ‘casual’ hints, basically doing everything outside of straight up admitting it to him, just to see how far he can push until shin starts to doubt whether he’s actually the father - when it’s just the two of you though... i think he’d be a little softer - but equally as possessive - you’re his, and so’s the kid growing inside of you
Kuroo: son do you know what a cuck is? Shinnosuke: no? Kuroo: wOULD YOU LIKE TO FIND OUT - @south-korea-cakes
dagshjskl i snorted when i read this but you’re not wrong lmao
hi rhi! i have a question about Lion’s Den! did oikawa purposely set the reader up to witness his true nature? or was it chance that she saw him kill?
no - i think he’d rather have kept you in the dark a little longer and tried to let things develop ‘organically’ but he’s not upset that you did find out the truth - gives him an excuse to move things along and take what he wants 👀
hey rhi:) soo my boyfriend of two years just broke up with me and so far a major comfort has just been rereading your stories. something about feeling desired, ya know? anyway, thanks for making me feel a little better <3 - @theofficialhufflepuff
aw i’m sorry to hear that :( i’m glad my fics can help make you feel a lil better - sending love bby! 💕
omg i adore everything in the soulmate series hello !! would any of the soulmate pairings ever end up feeling lowkey competitive w/ the other?? like all of them seem to mutually respect the other but would there ever come a point where smth pushes them into trying to outdo ur other soulmate when it comes to ur affection?
also have i mentioned how much i love ur writing bc i love ur writing
hmmm, not so much with oikawa & iwa or ushijima and tendou because i think they have pretty rock solid relationships with each other prior to the reader coming along - if they did it would only be minor stuff
the twins on the other hand - good fucking luck with them because they’ll turn everything into a competition. the moment one twin thinks you’re favouring the other too much expect to get dragged across the room and forced to spend ‘quality time’ with the other. it’s all very petty and exhausting and there is no possible chance for you to win. but thank you sweetheart!!
tonight im thinking about The Final Girl! boys forcing you to share a bed with them for the first time. With Kuroo’s face buried in the crook of your neck, one big hand palming your breast for good measure, Bo holding onto your waist, and Kaashi’s legs tangled with yours. its suffocating, really😪😓
asdgdhjdkdl suffocating? yes. now where do i sign up?? 🥺
you are so talented in writing it's crazy!! just the way you articulate things is ugh *chef's kiss*. i hope you are doing well and not receiving hate 🥺 ily pls
ahhh thank you so much, messages like these always make me so happy! ily bby! 💕
more karasuno first years soon? 👀
who’s to say?? i don’t have any full fics planned but maybe some concepts and thirsts??
if you make a yandere msby fic i’ll literally lose it i love your writing
👀i am considering it
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notyetneedcoffee · 5 years
Text
Steammy
Paring: dark!Steve Rogers x Reader Prompt: Steammy Summary: Steve is not happy you being touched Warnings: NSFW - Smut, dubious consent, rough sex, choking (not breath play)
Challenge fic celebration for the incredible @darkficsyouneveraskedfor - she’s reached 5.5k followers!!!!
Author’s Note: the GIF got me flagged sooooo here we go again! If you left a note with anything you feel like I need to see, you’ll have to repost.
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Steve Rogers arrived late to the hotel room the team commandeered for their control room. He'd been delayed by a small group of Senators who's sense of self-importance demanded a face to face meeting rather than the published Avenger's report everyone else received. By the time he arrived, the mission was underway and his patience was frayed.  
The dozen monitors stacked upon the table along the wall showed the private lounge of the executive suite from every angle. Several heavily armed security men stood about in expensive suits that almost hid their weapons, but not quiet. Two other men lounged on a huge curved sofa in even more expensive suits, a scantily clothed girl under each arm. Across from them, on a matching leather love seat their target spoke animatedly with one hand and held a woman on his lap with the other.  
Rogers froze, an angry beast roared to life in his head. He managed to keep his voice low and stable. "I thought Natasha was going in."
"I was." A voice answered from behind him. He turned to see the little red head sporting a swollen black eye. "Until one of Lundberg's goons got lucky. Elbow."
Steve scowled at the screen. "I can't believe you sent Y/N in there."
"She's trained." Nat replied at the same time Stark said, "She's great!"
Crossing his arms painfully tight, Steve leaned against the wall behind everyone else. His features drew together into a painful scowl as he watched you upon Lundberg's lap, skirt riding up and exposing your bare thighs. You tossed your head back and laughed, nuzzling your nose into his slicked back hair. Steve ground his teeth together.  
One of the other men had dropped out of the conversation, now fully making out with the woman on his right. The woman on his left lowered her head and began to suck his dick. The second man, though still conversing with Lundberg, massaged the tits of one girl while the other nibbled on his ear.  
Steve watched Lundberg's hand move up the inside of your thigh and disappear under your skirt. He was going to rip his arm off. "Get her the hell out of there." He growled. "She's got to have the biometric data you need."
"She can get out of there herself, Rogers. You don't need to babysit her." Nat shot him a sideways glance, easily seeing the effect the situation was having on the super soldier. However, she figured if he was too stuffy to out the relationship he had with you,, she wasn't going to cut him any slack.  
He tore his eyes away from the screen long enough to glare at her. Natasha smiled back.
"Damn," Stark chuckled. "We're recording this, right? This is being recorded? It's going full on Penthouse Forum in there. This shits better than PornHub."
A dangerous rumble escaped Steve's chest. The two men and four women on the sofa were indeed getting naked. Lundberg's tongue ran up and down your throat. Steve took a step towards the door. Fuck it, he didn't care who he pissed off.  
You suddenly tried to pull away from Lundberg, but he held you tight. One of the armed guard stepped forward. One hand went to your stomach, one to your mouth. Your too sweet voice whined. "Oh, Bobby. I think I'm gonna be sick."
He loosen his grip. "Now wait a minute if you think..."
Only one of the cameras caught the image of you sucking on your right ring finger. Under that nail, the powered substance induced a near immediate reaction. You leaped from Lundberg's lap and vomited the last three martinis into the potted plant.  
"Get her out of here!" He shouted.  
One of the armed security men escorted you down the hall to a suite. He pushed you inside, none too gently and locked you in. The closet door slipped open a second later and Clint Barton's smiling face popped out. "Hey there, ready to blow this joint?"
"Definitely." You smiled back.  
Inside the closet, a hole had been cut into the ceiling to look like a utilities hatch but it went to the room directly above. A tripod hoist pulled you up one at a time. Waiting in the bedroom, Natasha stood with an unusually big smile. "Good job."
"Thanks." You pulled nearly invisible pieces of synthetic film off your skin carefully and placed them on sterile glass slides. "Finger prints. Ugh, DNA. Palm prints. Did the camera get close enough on his eyes?" You took off the necklace, which held the microscopic camera in the charm.  
"Got it all." Nat collected everything. She handed you a soda to wash the taste from your mouth. "We've brought your duffel and got you a room through there if you want to go clean up. It's the bedroom on the other side of the lounge." She pointed at the door. "We'll debrief an do reports later, since we all saw the video there's no hurry."
"Perfect." You sighed, feeling gross.
Closing the bedroom door with a quiet click, you practically jumped out of your skin as Steve reached over and locked it. He’d been waiting, silently, in the dark. “Jeez, I’m going to put a bell on you!”
“I can’t believe you went in there.” Steve stepped into your space, towering over you.
“I was fine. Nat couldn’t go.”
“He was all over you.” Steve growled out.  
“It was a job.” You answered, unapologetic.
His hands grasped your upper arms. A bitter scowl twisted his beautiful features. “You said there’s only me, only I get to touch you, that you’re mine.”
“I did.” You swallowed, laying you palms on his chest. “I am.”
“I can smell that bastard on you.” Steve’s nose crinkled. “Come here.”
He pulled you into the large bathroom. Steve’s hands fisted up the flimsy fabric of you tiny cocktail dress and ripped it from your body. The intensity in his eyes held you frozen in place. One large hand grabbed you by the back of the neck and pushed you into the luxurious walk in shower.  
Steve stripped off his clothes, kicking them into a corner as he watched you remove the black lace bra and panties. His lip curled up, cursing. “I can’t believe you fucking wore those for him.”
“Steve,” You tried to reach for him, but he grabbed your wrist and twisted it behind your back. Your bare tits hit the cold marble tiles. He kicked your feet further apart.  
“Do not touch me, do not talk to me, until his stench is off of you.” Steve turned on the water the cold spray making you gasp. He released your wrist. “Put your hands up on the wall. Keep them there.”
You did as you were told, feeling the cold water go hot. Steve’s soapy hands started on your legs, rubbing hard, deep, leaving the skin pink. His fingers dug into the muscles of your inner thighs, making your knees angle together and a moan escape your lips.  
Steve stood, slapping you wet ass hard.  
You cried out. Cunt soaking, He pressed his hard cock against your ass, palming your pussy. He growled.  “Did he touch you here?”  
“No.” You shook you head.
“You wouldn’t lie to me?” His free hand held your head back by your throat. “Did he touch that cunt of mine?” His hand slapped your pussy, sending shocks through your core.
“No.” It came out in a shaky whine.
“I can smell him here.” His fingers squeezed around your throat for just a second. Spinning you around Steve pushed your back against the wall. With soap slicked hands and a cloth he rubbed the skin of you neck and chest  pink. The cloth hit the ground with a wet squish. Steve rough fingers rubbing into your breasts, your waist, and hips.  
“Wanted to ripped his fucking arms off.” He growled. “And you, squirming around on his goddamn lap. Rubbing that ass of yours …”
Steve spun you around again, pushing you hard against the tile. His hand cracked against your ass cheek, then the other. Two fingers shoved deep into your wet cunt. He pumped into you hard and fast, lifting you on to your toes. Growling in your ear. “Mine.”
Your legs began to quiver, chasing your climax, but Steve pulled away. He took a hand full of wet hair and forced your to your knees. Hot water sprayed in your face, bouncing off his chest and abdomen. You opened your mouth as he forced your head back. He pushed his cock passed you’d lips to the back of your throat, stretching your jaw. Taking him as best as you could, your hand squeezed around the base of his cock, moving in concert as his fucked you mouth.  
“Agh,” He breathed hard. “I’m gonna come. You hold hold it in your mouth. Ah, fuck.  I want to see you swallow it down.”
His hips snapped. Steve’s grip in your hair tightened, His release filled your mouth and you concentrated to keep from swallowing him down,  
Strong hands lifted you to your feet, pressing you against the tile again. His knee spread your legs hands held your wrists over your head, “Don’t swallow.” Steve ordered, biting your lower lip.
He held both your hands in his left. His right hand groped down your body, pulling at your nipples, slapping at the hardened peaks. Steve fingers slipped over your sensitive clit, rubbing and circling the bundle of nerves. Strong fingers curled into your cunt, pumping violently against your g spot. Wet sloppy sounds battled with the water of shower. You moaned, breathing heavy through your nose. You began to quake.  
“Open your mouth.” Steve growled. You did, showing him the inside filled with his come. “Swallow.” You did and then cried out as your orgasm slammed into you, cunt flooding over his hand. Steve covered your mouth in a brutal, bruising kiss. Teeth and tongue, and swallowed moans.  
Whether by serum enhanced stamina or sheer passion, Steve hard cock pressed against your belly demanding attention. He turned off the water before picking you up by the ass cheeks. Steve turned you into the opposite wall of the shower, your hot skin hitting tile. He buried his cock in your still quivering cunt, deep in one powerful push.  
You held on to his shoulders, legs wrapping around his hip as his brutal thrust slammed you into the marble. His hold left bruising fingertip marks on your ass. His cock battered into the wall of your cunt, tearing another organs from you.
He did not stop, did not allow you to come down. Skin slapped against skin, echoing. Your harsh breathes and groans pushing him on. He was going to tear you apart and you loved it. Pain danced with pleasure, making you dizzy,
He growled in your ear, teeth pulling at the lobe. “Say it.”
“Mine!” You pulled at his hair, another wave crashing into you, cunt clutch against him.
Steve teeth sank into your throat. “Say it!”
“I’m yours!”
“Yes!” He came, practically knocking the wind from you against the marble tile. Steve let go of you and you slip to the shower floor. He leaned over you and breathed in your ear. “Don’t you dare clean up. I want you to smell like me until we get home.”
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ninadewitt · 5 years
Text
Colour Me Curious: interrogation
Warnings: swearing! yeehaw
Also some high school tomfoolery ft emo Kylo Ren
P.s first fic so pls be nice and ignore grammar pls!
Fear is for the weak. you are not nervous, you won’t let yourself be. That pit in your stomach didn’t have anything to do with Kylo Ren, you just hadn’t eaten since lunch, where you technically lost some food when you chucked it at Rey’s head. Sure it was only one chip you lost but a chip was a chip. You always bit the skin around your nails, nothing new there and a jittering leg, you came out the womb with that tick, maybe you should see a doctor about it; loose nerve, maybe? can nerves be loose? 
“Right (Y/L/N), Fess up, why you lookin’ like you’re being hunted? Your leg’s making me dizzy with all that shaking.” 
Poe asked while changing gears; he’d been your  ride home since you started high school and he always used being trapped in a moving hunk of metal to his advantage. Often using the same tactic, pretending to be caring or nonchalant whilst asking you a question, luring you into a false sense of security before pouncing on you for gossip. You distinctly remember that one time, when you were both freshmen, and you had a crush on Snap, one of Poe’s team mates and he drove round town for an hour trying to get you to spill the beans after he saw you looking at Snap for a second too long. 
However, although pushy, Poe was incredibly trustworthy and never told a soul about what you had said, not even Finn. So really you should get some stress relief out of these car sessions, because free therapy, right? But because you were so damn stubborn and loathed smug look on his face when you finally cracked, you opted to suffer in silence.
 “I don’t know what your on about, I’m fine.”
You knew a response like that wasn’t strong enough to stop his questioning but you were only five minutes away from your house. Surely it would hold him till then. Nope. 
“Lies!” 
Huffing, you angled your body further away from your tormentor glaring in the rear mirror, while he began his line of questioning.
“Well, you were fine at lunch, so what happened between now and then?” 
“Alright inspector gadget, there is no need to examine this case. I. Am. Fine” 
“I know you have Bio after lunch, so whatevers got you in a funk happened then.”
“Nothing happened!”
“Connix accidentally set your hair on fire again? Nah, you would smell crispy, last time you smelled sooooo crispy when that happened. You stepped into the car and I thought you brought bacon”
“Poe, drop it already!”
“Oh ho ho, I Know” He took one hand of the wheel and pointed at you shaking a single finger in your direction
“This is about Ren, he’s in that class, what did he do, mutilate a puppy?” 
“Stop being an Asshole, he isn’t that bad” You couldn’t believe you were defending him after he was a dick to you but here you were.
“(Y/N), He killed his Dad” he deadpanned
“Oh please, he did not. I saw Han taking out the trash this morning, fully functioning and oh yeah, NOT dead.”
You were so close now, your house was right there, shining bright and filling you with so much hope. How you had managed to stall him for this long you’d never know, maybe Poe was losing his game.
 You never though that the crooked fence, that your Dad put up one summer and never maintained, would bring you such joy but in this moment nothing looked so good. And it was getting nearer and nearer…. until you had to turn your head around to see it. It was behind you. So focused on the house, it took you a second to process that you had driven past it. That bastard was driving away. 
“Um, Poe, my house is that a-way” You nudged your head backward, pleading him with your eyes to let you out. And when that didn’t work and he kept on moving, you tried faining innocence:
“I mean, don’t worry about going back. You have a lot going on, I’ll just get out here and walk. Thanks for the ride though” 
Smirking at your attempts, Poe just kept his foot on the gas until soon your house wasn’t in sight anymore. What time was it anyway? You said you would meet Kylo at four, which already left you a bit squeezed for time, especially if you wanted to look somewhat decent. Ugh half three, well say goodbye to your post school PB&J. 
“Fine!” 
You dramatically huffed before continuing to explain the event of your bio class to Poe and your subsequent pairing with Kylo. And with a cheeky grin on his face your ex-friend did a U turn back to your house, looking very much like the cat who got the cream. But before he let you out he bestowed a final piece of wisdom upon you: 
“Remember not to look at the reproductive system (Y/L/N), we all know Ren’s a big virgin and he won’t be able to stop himself from popping one up. And I don’t think you’ll be able to deal with that yet.” 
“says you, Finn bent over yesterday and you couldn’t speak for twenty minutes!” the blush that rose up onto his cheeks after you said that suggested that you had won this battle, so you happily skipped through the door to get changed.
A part of you knew that wearing all black in order to impress a boy was silly; you just wanted him to be your friend again, you didn’t need to go to these lengths to impress him. But as you daintily chewed on the crust of your sandwich in an attempt to avoid smudging your lipstick, you knew that you were a goner and just dealt with the fact that you were now trying to garner his attention through a new emo-esk aesthetic that, if you were being honest with yourself, suited you. 
While continuing to pick at your appearance it became hard to stop yourself from feeling excited by the idea of your study session, especially after spending weeks pining for his friendship. You finally felt as though you has a shot at maybe getting him to like you again, or at least tolerate you for a little while, which was a start. You had managed to gain his trust before and you could do it again. 
And so with a final brush of your hair and a dusting away of any crumbs on your tee, you grabbed you books and pranced down the stairs, prepping yourself to charm the fuck out of Kylo Ren. 
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