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Hiiiii Okok so this is my longest fic and I got kinda super into it and that’s why it took so long ok. Hopefully you like it and thanks for all the interactions! I’m going to be doing a Choso fic next since it was so close between Choso and Sukuna <3
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TW: SIZE KINK, CONCUBINE!reader, TRUEFORM!Sukuna, he has two c words, dumbification, cream pies, DP!!!, mentions of death/killing other Sukuna type shit, filth, porn with plot uhhh I think that’s it but if not IM SORRY okok enjoy NOT PROOF READ.
WC: 3.2k O.O OMG okay so this got lengthy. I hope u like it!!!!
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You had been working at a Orian house for less than a year before Ryomen Sukuna came in and bought you along with three other girls for his concubines. He picked you four based on looks and bloodlines. Since only the other three girls came from good blood you were very surprised that he picked you as well.
What you didn’t know is that he had only meant to go and pick three girls. You had just caught his eye. You were the tallest of the house and had the longest hair. Your face was youthful but you still achieved the mature sultry beauty that he craved. “A pity pick.” Said the head lady. “You’re so generous for picking her as well Lord Sukuna but we have more girls that are mor-.” Are you questioning my judgment? I said I’d take her as well.” His deep voice reverberated through the room, his crimson eyes boring into the much shorter woman. “Of course Lord Sukuna. You’re very generous. Thank you!” She has beamed nervously at him.
The other three girls looked at you with envy which they tried to cover with a fake smile to not upset or disturb Lord Sukuna. You felt as if your world was turned upside down. You had just barely grown accustomed to being a working girl and now you were suddenly a concubine for the more fearsome Lord there was. He towered over, well, everyone. His strong arms, all four of them, had been draped in a black silk kimono. His short pink hair was almost hanging over his brow, framing his sharp jawline and broad forehead. You couldn’t deny that even with his extra eyes and limbs, this man was indeed handsome.
You didn’t want to make yourself any more noticeable and just prayed to whatever gods could hear you to keep you safe and hopefully you’ll be of good use at his estate. You’ve heard stories of how his concubines were pampered and treated fairly well which did little to ease your anxiety but that little glimmer of hope is what kept your thoughts away from the many possibilities as to why he needed new concubines enough to make it through the day.
Once you all made it back to his gigantic estate, he had his chef show you and the other girls your quarters. You each had your own chambers which was definitely a huge plus. Though, your room was the last one available and therefore, was the least pleasant. “You can always paint the walls if Lord Sukuna approves. I will have your lady in waiting bring you new sheets and pillows so you’re comfortable.” They said before leaving you alone in the dimly lit room. You hadn’t brought much with you besides your few sets of clothes, but Sukuna had ordered Uraume to toss them out when you reached the estate.
“You don’t need those filthy clothes while you’re here. More clothes-better clothes will be waiting for you in your rooms.” He had said. You guess he didn’t like them very much. You were able to sneak one small piece of cloth from the blanket your mother made you under your kimono to keep. If Uraume seen, they hadn’t said anything about it. You sigh and begin to look through the clothes that were in the room on the bed before putting them away in the chest at the foot of the bed. Uraume had picked out one set of clothes for you to change into, a light pink silk kimono robe that covered everything. It came to right above your ankles since you were so tall.
“Miss. Here are your sheets. Would you mind if I fixed your bed for you?” You jumped at the soft voice coming from the doorway. A short older lady stood with her head bowed and in her arms were the red sheets, a comforter, and a few pillowcases for your bed. “Of course th-thank you.” You bowed slightly before moving out of her way. Your hair had been pulled out of your face with a hair pin leaving half of it up in a small bun at the back of your head and the rest flowing down your back. “Do you know if I’m allowed to wander the grounds? I’d really love to see the garden if I could.” You asked softly as she finished tucking the comforter in. She turned and smiled at you.
“I’ll have to ask Uraume first my lady. But I will be back in a bit to check on you and hopefully I can show you the garden before supper. Please do rest I know the trek here wasn’t very soft on you ladies.” With that she bowed and scuttled down the hallway to find Uraume. The walls were bare and bleak. The one window you had, while it was rather large, only showed out towards the back of the estate, the large garden just barely covered by the large hedge surrounding it, making it almost impossible to see anything but the tops of the Sakura and Wisteria trees.
“Look she even has a retched chamber.” One of the other new concubine had snarked from the hallway leading to the other two cackling like hyenas. You roll your eyes and look at them, still in the same clothes as they were in when you had left the Orian house. “And look at her kimono! Much too short for her lankey body. Such a waste of good silk.” Said another, as she stepped into your room. Your back straightened and you glared at all three of them.
“At least I have decency to change as our Lord ordered us to. You lot can’t even seem to follow simple directions. I bet your new clothes are still sitting on the bed waiting for you to get your head out of your asses and put them away.” Your glare darkened as you looked down on them. You were not afraid of any girl, you had your scraps in the Orian house before and you were the one getting in trouble for it even if they started like this. That didn’t stop you from defending yourself. The girls had all stepped into your room now making ugly comments about your worth and your upbringing. Before you could reply with the same distain for them Uraume appeared in the door behind them, clearing their throat before speaking.
“Lord Sukuna will not approve of your pointless quarrels. Stop this at once and return to your respected chambers. And change out of those clothes. There are more than enough for you to pick from. If this is how your obedience is starting you’ll not be here much longer. Now go.” They barked out making the three girls glare at you over their shoulder before bowing to Uraume and scurrying to their chambers.
“Thank you. I apologize for my outburst Uraume.” You say as you now your head to them. “Mm.” They respond before setting down a bucket of small containers with a few different brushes. “Lord Sukuna has gifted these to you for your room. Your lady in waiting has said that you would like to visit the garden?” They asked. You beam at them and kindly take a look in the bucket that is filled with smaller containers of different color paints
“If I could please? I’d like to see the flowers and trees for inspiration for my room.” You say softly still smiling at them. They nod their head and your lady in waiting walks in after Uraume leaves. “Let’s get out there before the other girls hear. You’re the first to be let wander around so let’s not make a big scene for them to talk about.” She whispers quietly as she leads you out past the dinning hall to the big doors that lead out into the large garden. The tall Sakura trees were in full bloom as well as the wisteria and the beautiful lotus and spider Lillies all around.
“It beautiful. I’ve never seen so many gorgeous flowers in one place.” You beam looking around finding new flowers at every turn.
“Lord Sukuna had Uraume pick out the flowers a long time ago. Before I was even born. You’re lucky to have been allowed to wander the garden your first day.” Your lady in waiting, who’s name you’ve learned was Moira, said in a soft voice smiling at you. Your eyebrows drew together slightly at her words but you brushed off her comment and continued walking through the gorgeous foliage stopping at the entrance to the big maze of hedges. Moira warned you to stay away from it unless you were with Uraume as she didn’t know the maze as well as they did. After another five minutes, the both of you hurried into the mansion and down the hall to the dinning room where Uraume was walking with the other three girls.
“Lord Sukuna will be calling each of you to his chambers after dinner. Your seats are arranged already. Dinner will be out in a minute.” They said as the ladies in waiting have lined up on one side of the room closest to the kitchen door. As the plates of food came in on silver trays. Roasted fish and rice were on each plate which had your stomach growling. The vegetables were steamed and seasoned perfectly. The four of you were served chalices of red wine and after you all finished your food you were directed to wash up and wait in your chambers for your lady in waiting to help you bath then be presented to Lord Sukuna.
Dinner was amazing and you were excited to have a nice hot bath with the help of Moira. You of course we’re the last girl to get bathed and then be sent to his chambers.
“Don’t be nervous just let it be. Our Lord Sukuna is in a good mood tonight so I anticipate his kindness towards you. Don’t be frightened by the sounds of the other girls. Just be yourself and be obedient always.” Moira had warned as she helped you into your thin red silk robes. Your hands were shaking a little at the thought of how he would be. He’s a very large being and even with your above average height he still towered over you. You walk with your lady in waiting to his chambers. She knocks before his deep voice tells her to come in. You both walk in his room, a cloud of smoke from his pipe and the scent of sex filling the air. He’s smoking his pipe by the door to a balcony shifting his eyes to you, a puff of smoke leaving his lips and making the glowing red of his eyes even more menacing.
“Leave us.” He says to Moira. She bows and smiles at you softly before scurrying out of the room closing the door behind her. Your eyes trail down his naked form before landing on the two hard cocks that were standing proudly between his legs. You didn’t realize you had let out a gasp of surprise until Sukuna chuckled darkly at you before he strides to you slowly. He was like a cat stalking his prey right before he pounced.
“I surely hope you’re better than the last three. Their whining was all too little to satisfy me. Now kneel before your King.” His voice was hoarse and gravely due to the pipe smoke and the sex from earlier. You obliged silently, falling to your knees before him as he sat on his huge bed. You swallowed thickly gazing at his hard members and then snapping your eyes to his.
“What’re y’waiting for brat?” He growled grabbing your hair and pushing your head closer. You reached out and grasped the lower cock with Shakey hands as you let your tongue roll out and kitten lick the tip before you began sucking on it. A low noise resonated from his chest making you look up at him as he pushed you to take more of him in your mouth. He didn’t care that your teeth scraped the sides since he was so thick, the little sharp pains only making his cock throb more on your tongue.
“Mmmm the other three couldn’t even pick which one to suck first. Then they couldn’t even t-take me as far as you can. And they said you were the least experienced. Youre taking my cock so deep in your throat just like a good little slut should.” He praised growling every time the thick head of his dick pushed deeper in your throat. Tears were streaming down your cheeks as he fucked into your mouth slowly before forcing you off of him and dragging your mouth up to his.
“You’ve already impressed me. Don’t get greedy brat. Still gonna ruin your slutty little cunt.” He growled in between kisses as he discharged your kimono with one set of hands while the other lifted you onto his lap.
“Mmmh! M-my lord!~” you whine as he rubs you against both of his cocks, spreading your slick over both of them. He can’t take it anymore and uses two of his hands to lift you up and another to guide his lower cock inside you, your juices allowing his thick member to stretch you easily.
“S’like youre suckin me right in. Mmmhh fucking greedy little cunt huh?” He grunts as he sits you all the way down on him, his tip twitching right at your cervix, making you cry out his name. His lips are sucking and biting at your neck and collarbones marking you as his before he grips your hips tighter and begins fucking you up and down his length.
“Can’t wait to fuckin stretch you around both of them. Gonna fill this pussy so good.” He groans feeling you tightening around him and gripping his pink hair.
“P-please my lord! Please let me c-cum for you!” You whimper out loving how full you are. He chuckles darkly before you feel a hot wet tongue on your clit. The maw on his abdomen had rolled its tongue out to lick and suck on your clit while he was fucking you on his thick cock.
“You want to cum like this? Does it frighten you to be fucked like this? Too bad. You’re not cumming until I allow you to brat.” He growls against your neck before lifting you completely off of his cock and angling himself above you. His cocks jump at the sight of your pussy clenching around nothing and dripping with your arousal and his precum. He strokes both dicks before pushing the tips against your entrance. Your eyes snap open and look at him.
“Lord S-Sukuna both? I-I don’t know if I ca-“ he cuts you off by sending a sharp slap to your clit. “You can and you will.” Is all he said before plunging both of his inhumanly large cocks inside your weeping pussy. Your back arches off the bed and into his chest as you cry out, the stretch feeling so tight but so so damn good. He growled as he bottomed out inside your cunt, you felt every inch of him twitching inside you before he pulled his hips back and plunged right back inside.
“K-Kunaa~” was the only thing you could get out between your strangled moans and whines. He bared his teeth at you before setting a brutal pace as he fucked his cocks in and out of you, your wetness making a white ring at the base of both of his members.
“Mmm look how well you’re taking my cocks huh? Pretty little pussy just suckin m’in.” Sukuna groans as his pace relents. He pulls out just so the tips are in then he shoves them back in hard and slow, making your whole body shake with pleasure.
“Ahh S-Sukuna it’s t-too much hah fuck~” you whimper as the maw on his gut licks your clit again making you cry his name and cum around his cocks, he hisses at how tight you squeeze him. Sukuna’s pace quickens as he chases his own orgasm, half surprised at how well your body fits around his twin cocks. He leans down and nips at your neck before kissing you passionately. It quickly turns into a clashing of teeth and lips as he begins to put you into a deep mating press.
“M’gonna breed this cunt. F-fuck you’re so fucking tight for me. So wet. You gonna milk my cocks slut? Gonna take my seed deep in your womb?” Your voice has grown hoarse from moaning and screaming for him. His words swiping lightning to your core which is gushing around him still, his hard lengths rubbing every spot inside you as if you were made for him. One of his hands press down on the bulge in your lower stomach, tracing the dent his cocks we’re making every time he bottomed out. A dark chuckle bellows from his chest.
“Look at what m’doin to you. Ruining this pussy for any man. Feels like you’re cunts molded to the shape of my cocks.” His deep voice makes your legs shake in another wet and sloppy orgasm. Your nails are taking down every inch of skin you can reach on him, leaving angry red marks everywhere. Sukuna pants in your ear as his orgasm approaches. His grip on your thighs becoming bruising and his pace faltering. You can feel each of his cocks twitch before he half growls and half roses as he spills his hot thick cum inside your quivering pussy.
“Breed me My Lord p-please! Haah y-you feel so f-fucking good.” You cry as yet another orgasm crashes over you, a mix of both of your juices seeping from around his cocks that are buried deep inside you. Sukuna slowly pulls his cocks from your overstuffed hole, watching with a smirk as his seed spills from your used cunt.
“Fuckin gorgeous. I knew I had picked you for a reason. The last three whores couldn’t make me cum half as much as you did. Tell me brat, what would you say about me taking this pussy over and over, claiming you as mine?” His voice sends chills down your spine, his lips leaving more bites across your chest and neck.
“I’m here to satisfy you My Lord. To do as you say.” Was your answer. He hummed at that chuckling slightly. He knew sleep was about to take hold of you and you wouldn’t make it to your own chambers tonight. He sighed and did something he’s never done with a concubine before. Sukuna, the King of Curses, pulled you to his chest and draped his sheet over both of you, letting you sleep in his bedroom and skin to skin with him.
He looked down at you as you feel asleep, feeling a foreign feeling in his gut. He just knew he had to keep you. You took him so well and had no problem letting him do it until he was satisfied. He’s had favorable concubines before but you were different. You weren’t scared of him. You held your own against the other three when they were harassing you. You had that fire inside you similar to his on a minor scale. He actually admired your boldness. Sukuna made up his mind as he drifted into sleep, finally sated by you. You were to be his only concubine. He’d keep the other three for whatever else he wanted but you were his favorite.
#jjk x reader#jjk men#jjk smut#jjk fanfic#jjk x you#jjk choso#jjk sukuna#jjk ryomen sukuna x reader#sukuna trueform#ryomen sukuna#sukuna
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Purely out of curiosity I’m just dying to know how myany followers do you have?
at least 7. sometimes 9
#return to sender#u can guess if you want. there is many of you i guess#i need to purge my followers soon tho rip#it feels showboaty to talk abt lol im srry im just some guy#literally most some guy ever of all time#if u guess close ill post a carrot or smth
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A major annoying thing about being in a male dominated stem field (chemistry for me) is you basically work w guys 99% of the time & they ALL think you have a crush on them if you’re even fleetingly nice. And so far I’ve refused to water down my personality to compensate for it but it’s so annoying knowing I’m inadvertently feeding into someone’s unchecked ego
#My approach is I’ll treat my guy friends like I do my girl friends#And I guess I have a flirtatious personality from the jump so people get the wrong idea#But idk sometimes I’m literally just friendly and some dumbass guy is like yeah she wants me carnally#Getting confessed to by one of my classmates last spring while taking some of the hardest courses of my life was so traumatic#Then being hit up by his friend right after 😭😭#Please tell me what I did to make u think I was into you enough for you to be this bold so I can never do it again#This happens to me at parties too and guys get too touchy#Why does it have to be this serious#This is why I’m so glad to be avoiding guys rn like straight cis men are literally the bane of my existence#SO bitter ab these people they’ve ruined guy friendships for me forever#So many suppressed feelings ab this too I should journal about it probably
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me, looking at the most toxic, awful, horrendously unhealthy fictional relationship in the world: why can't i have what they have? :(
#remind me of how easily you could kill me then say i won't die until you let me#you insult me and I'll insult you and we'll both know each other so unfathomably well that every word is a finely tuned blade#we'll kiss and you'll draw blood and I'll think of you every time i feel the bite mark#in every universe we find each other and we hate each other and we want each other more than we can say through words#tell the world i'm yours while i glower with reverent loathing#every conversation we have is poison#we twist and distort each other until there's nothing left but two shattered halves of a one way mirror#I'll hold you tightly like you're the only thing that matters#we'll slowly settle into a sort of rancid dependent domesticity#and set out to ruin each other until even those jagged shards turn to dust#(apologies reader of these tags#the “you” i'm referencing isn't referring to you personally#or you generally#i'm just cooking up more motivation to write sdhdjshdj)#(oh! also- please note the use of FICTIONAL#this is all just imagination loll)#why yes this is about#toxic old man yaoi#however did u guess#also just general#toxic yaoi#toxic yuri#but ykkkk#I watched one too many animatics#billford#hahahaaa who said thatttt not meeee hahaaaa#they ruined me#oh also-#pureshadow
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Me: I joke about writing the same McCoy centric story over and over again in different ways
Me: and like. I love doing it and imma keep doing it because it makes me happy.
Me: but also. I do sometimes wonder if it's like. A little Much.
Me: like maybe I should branch out or something
Me: [reads another fundamental and extremely insulting misread of McCoy's character by someone who is clearly making a Choice to cast McCoy as the villain, because they have to get him out of the way of spirk, because they're too???? idk immature??? to realize that even when you're in a relationship with one person, other ppl can and SHOULD still be important to you]
Me: lmao I hope I AM too much actually!!!! I hope it is 100% obnoxious how much I love that doctor!!!!! Time to write more versions of the same story of McCoy being forced to realize that he is loved and cared for!!!!!!
Me: I KNOW MY NICHE AND IMMA DIE IN THAT NICHE, THANKS
#mine#not putting this in the mcc*y/tr*k tags bc i am venting not trying to start 💾🐎 [discourse]#but woof. WOOF. i want you to know that if you hate the doc then sp*ck and k*rk would hate YOU#like seeing someone say they're sp*ck or jim coded and then say flagrantly absurd things about mcc*y.......u are garbage coded actually.#sp*ck and k*rk would literally never#i will never understand how so many ppl can ship mcc*y’s besties and then???? hate on mcc*y?????????#i block LIBERALLY so i have a lot of b*nes haters blocked already tbf#i just stumble across one in the wild sometimes alas#that mindset btw is how that counseling fic came about lmao - we were talking about how if sp*rk dated they'd still drag mcc*y EVERYWHERE#romantic or platonic he is THEIRS just like they're HIS. it's a triumvir*te my guy#any two of them hook up they're still making the third stay at their side 24/7 lolllllll#how can you claim to love sp*ck and k*rk and so fundamentally misunderstand them and their relationship with b*nes#genuinely tragique#you are missing out on so much fun#we are not watching the same show lmao <3 leave my doctor alone <3 leave his bfs alone too <3#me: i should let things go / sp*ck: have you instead considered being a petty bitch / me: what / sp*ck: they can get fucked and die mad 🖖#me: ur so right sp*ck / sp*ck: i usually am#guess who literally just found out that if the word is contained w/in a longer tag it now shows up if you search that word!!!!!#that change very well may not be recent but i just found out!!!! anyway. asterisks added.#i give up. tumblr keeps putting this in the fucjing tags. hellsite (full of hatred)#eta: didn't think to make this non-rebloggable earlier but now it is lmao. it's just a vent post y'all <3
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this is a test
#i’m bored i just wanna see how many words i can put in the tags like will it just keep going on forever or will they stop me like i know th#the tag limit is 30 ok so the iindividual tag limit is 140 characters that’s actually so rude i wanted to keep going forever and see how lo#g this could be but i guess we can do this 30 times ok what the flip should i talk about hm i was playing the guitar today but i rage quit#ause the song was hard and hurting my fingers! ermmmmm it was sunny ok this is boring let’s think of more exciting things to type hmmm acco#ding to all known laws of aviation- jk i’m not doing the bee movie script but can you imagine i think that would be funny hmmmmm words i lo#e podcasts so bad that’s a fact no one has ever know before my blog definitely isn’t all about audio dramas the people are definitely not a#ready aware of this jesus christ this is only the seventh one of these this is actually quite a lot of space i underestimated how much i ha#e to type btw there’s probably spelling mistakes in here somewhere or autocorrect has been annoying but i cba to retype anything so i don’t#care lolllllllllllll how do you feel about oscar malevolent i feel a normal amount actually (lie) yk what i really miss sam and colin alrea#y like i’m actually not okay i really hope we hear from sam again in s2 and also colin ngl i hope ur in the computers soz or not dead miss#im like a bastard my paranoid it king ok erm im running out of things to say um heartstopper s3 was crazy good i cried lmao i love gay peop#e so much it’s crazy i hope it gets renewed for s4 i need to reread the comics lowkey and the books they’re all so talented for being so yo#ng it scares me ngl !!!!!! the tmagp hiatus is getting to me slightly like february in reality is soon and not that far away for how podcas#ts go but seriously how am i supposed to live until then without knowing what happened. please colin be alive. ive only just realised i can#use fills stops. sorry that’s made everything a bit messy. i should’ve been doing this before. whoops. anyways. hi mutuals i love you all s#much i hope you enjoy my rambles and shitposts cause i enjoy yours very much! never think you’re being annoying i literally don’t care be a#annoying as you want posts as much as you want i am ur biggest fan <3 im getting a bit fatigued from typing like my mind is blank basically#now it’s just turned into a. stream of consciousness but i don’t really have any thoughts to put here idk if we’re halfway ermmmm omg it’s#lmost halloween how crazy is that time is flying by i kinda forgot it was october lmao. it’s wild how it’s basically almost christmas. like#what. that’s illegal. how is it wintertime again. what the flip. i miss summer already take me backkkkkkk. i hope my phone doesn’t crash or#smth cause i’ve not saved this as a draft and i cba to do any of this again. maybe i should save it. ok i will when i reach the next tag bc#ok it stopped me but i’ve saved it and holy jesus it’s a lot of text im just sat here giggling there’s really no point to any of this other#than me being bored sooooooooooooooooo (imagine if i just did the letter o for every character wouldn’t that be crazy) so wait there’s 140#haracters and 30 tags so what’s 30 x 140. someone hurry. i haven’t done maths lessons in two and a half years i’ve forgotten everything wai#let me get the calculator app ok im back it said 4100 characters so. i dont know how many words that roughly is but its. a decent amount. o#what the flip why am i wasting tag space with maths. i hate maths. my screen time has been actually soooooooooo bad recently like damn some#one put my phone in a block of ice please joshua gillespie style. my mind is running out of things to say. do i talk about myself. im james#im 18 which is weird cause wdym im an adult go away. ive run out of facts. i love podcasts and procedural dramas that stupid firefighter sh#w is my life unfortunately. i think chappell roan should be the queen of england instead of king charles. i dont like having a king cause#ho needs men in power not me. ok um this is the last tag equal rights for all. yolo. the time will pass anyways! thank u boredom ok bye gn:
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Yes, you may retire, but I will not reveal my identity just yet.
It’s hard to comprehend just how long I’ve known you. Five is such a small number. Your hand could count to it so easily, but years stretch out the quantity of such a digit. And in every one of those days ever since I met you, I don’t regret the passing that led us to this relationship.
I enjoy the moments when you return to tumblr for a checkup or a hello, but you have a life to live in the real world. You are someone I look back to within the five years with a smile, knowing I that I had the chance to befriend such a lovely person.
I’m sure all the many friends you’ve made on this site agree.
I, as dottore mod and your mutual, wish you greatness in the future when the distance of the internet separate us. May the joy and happiness you provided me be reciprocated to you in the future by a tenfold.
I’ll give you many hugs in return. Thank you for being who you are and giving me laughter when the air around me filled and emptied my lungs in dull cycles—they, too, thank you for that change of laughter once in a while.
Ah, I seemed to have gone on a slight tangent. Perhaps, sappy cal brings out the sappy mod in me. All I wanted to say is to live your life to the fullest because it is what you deserve for all the positive moments you’ve brought to people. <3
~ dottore mod.
no wait there r actually tears in my eyes oh my gkfofnfjjf
#🥹🥹…… MODDDD!!!!#WAIT#….AUGHHFJDDJB ;; im#im cryingnjgngjfj#augh this is so sweet mod i was NOT EXPECTINGBFJF#you have a way with words. makes me cry :’)#i wish i cld express myself better w my words!! ive changed a lot these past few months#but expressing myself continues to be a struggle i guess hehe#but but but i hope its clear that i cherish you very much mod#you and lock r pretty much the highlights of my entire tumblr experience 🥹#been through many phases on tumblr and met so mamy diff kind of people but like#u and lock r those kind of people that i just Know i cld always come back to and feel like im at Home#WAIT IK ACTUALU CRYING I CAN FEEL THE SINGULAR TEAR DRIPPING HAHAJSJX#BUT y yeah🥺 im so honored to be perceived in such a joyous way by u <3#my biggest fear is to be forgotten . and i think that since i have u and lock . that fear wont easily come true 🤍#yk one of my friends said to me that im a person who smiles a lot FHDJDJD and that i shld protect it no matter what happens#i still have doubts worries anxieties but i crave nothing more than to be remembered as the person who infects others w her joy#makes life so much more brighter and worth living for 🫶#AHHHH I YAPPED SM FJFJFJFK IM JUST IN MY FEELS RN#CRYING TEARS OF JOYY ToT#i js appreciate the people who stayed for this long sm ;; <3#hfjdbdjfdjdj#i wldnt be this happy go lucky person if it wasnt for u guys !!#i beat around the bush a lot and often get through everythung with jokes and humor#but in this case i want to say that u guys r so so loved and cherished by me hfjdhdj 👉👈🤍
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Your post about misogynistic/patriarchal women really resonated with me and I empathize SO much girl I would be rich if I had a dollar for every single time i’ve seen a woman say some variant or another of “women are WAY worse than men!!!!” and wholeheartedly mean it. It ESPECIALLY makes me feel like the Joker when I see women who by all means carry themselves as feminist/progressive say shit like “misogynistic women are way worse than misogynistic men!!!” or some other misogynistic gaslighty bullshit that came straight from the ancient misogyny playbook.
I wish there was more of us having the space and drive to criticize our own sex class’ actions in a fair and just way without carrying the guilt of how our sex class is treated & without also following the subconscious path of least resistance (woman bad, man good). I wish there were more outlets for us to just be so fucking for real with each other, but in the way of respect, maturity, empathy, dignity, and accountability. I wish we all had more self awareness about the patterns we perpetuate.
It sucks when you not only have to cope with 50% of the population automatically hating you because of the morally neutral biological sex you happened to develop as in the womb, but you also have to deal with the members of your OWN sex perpetuating the cycles of subjugation and working against their own interests on top of that because of how deeply the knife of misogyny is plunged into our stomachs. As an individual girl/woman in the world, you have to incessantly deal with and mentally prepare for the indiscriminate bombardment of misogyny that is almost guaranteed to sneak up on you from every single direction possible. Feeling like you have close to no true allies, or only very few of them on a global scale. It’s a brutal, harrowing feeling.
It definitely gave me more insight into how the human mind copes with pain and injustice in bizarre and miserable ways, I guess. Newlyy I am ripping off the skin of my face thinking about this, it truly is suffocating. The patterns, the cycles, the history repeating itself!!!! I see you and I get it
exactly. you're completely right. no notes.
#one note i was on tiktok this morning#and saw a tiktok of a guy who was like idk fucking 40 or something and hes like showing his house which is still like#decorated like a college guy apartment like he ued a hockey stick as a curtain rod for example#and he was being self deprecating but clearly thought it was more charming than embarrassing#but anyway his voiceover is like 'guys if youre in your twenties and have a girlfriend lock that down and marry her or you'll end up like m#and it was so annoying cause like first of all male no one is forcing you to live like this. you could choose to live like an adult even#though you thankfully dont have a mommy--sorry a wife#second its so annoying that hes like telling other guys hey be sure to marry a girl so she can do all these adult things that you dont want#to do#but finally#the reason im sharing this here#is because there were soooooo many comments from women being like 'dont worry! youre some womans cup of tea! just keep looking'#or like 'wheres the green flag guy?' referncing a guy i guess on tiktok who like takes note of green flag male behavior#to be fai there were other women in the comments saying like thank god you aren't married. no woman should have to deal with this#i just hate when women baby men
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finished rogue trader. so mad about it i had to take a nap and then start a whole new playthru again to cope <3
#tay plays rogue trader#I DIDNT GET THE HEINRIX-LEAVES-THE-INQ ENDING..... AFTER EVERYTHING...... GRILLS MYSELF............#actually sooooooooo miserable like what do you mean ''the two lovers rarely crossed paths going forward..... '' shut up literally fake news#that man was HOOKED !!!!! he could not get enough !!!!!!#sigh. anyways. *clicks new game* heres how leda von valancius can still win#aka playing diviner is so funny bc i can just metagame thru every mistake i have ever made irt her playthru <3 just a dream bby its fine dw#anyway i loved the game sooooooo much. way more than i thought i would#definitely a top 5 rpg for me i think#my only main critique (outside of the 7 million bugs lol) was smth SO many games do and it pisses me off to no end#how the game will just. literally END. it will CEASE. the second u do the final boss#da2 did it ! fallout did it ! pillars of eternity did it ! bg3 did it before they added the epilogue months later#its so common and it makes me mad bc its so lazy... like throughout the entire game the story allows u to opt in#to moments of catharsis w ur companions.... to get their viewpoints and reflect on whats happened. but the ending just Ends lol#and ik Ending the story is a catharsis in and of itself but damb maybe i just want to celebrate killing whatever the fuck a c'tan shard is#with bae yknow. but fuck me i guess !!!#KJFDGJKFDG#BUT IM JUST BEING A HATER. LOVED THE GAME RECOMMEND TO ALL THE MOOTS !#im so excited to replay and make all the same choices i did the first time but Sexy this time. and also to build the party correctly#so its not just me and heinrix carrying everybody on our backs this time 😔✊ tho that was pretty funny tbh
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Honestly, every single time the whole 'poppy playtime is a bendy rip-off' stuff ever shows up I find it all extremely unconvincing and silly.
For one thing, rip-off usually is meant to imply that it's a cheap lazy copy of a better more polished thing, and uh. Sorry but even from chapter 1? Poppy Playtime is a better game than Bendy, it has a simple but understandable story, the game manages to be thrilling, creepy, and very intense at times... I mean that Huggy chase in the vents ALONE puts it way above Batim for me.
I mean BATDR had the most slow stupid chase I've ever seen [and every other encounter with the ink demon is text telling u he's there and then a timer goes down and u get jumpscared] and batim's chases were either silly or just not nearly as theatric or terrifying as that.
When making the vent sequence I mean not only is it absolutely horrifying to realize how fast Huggy is in there but also it's so theatric and cool? The fact that you round a corner after thinking you escaped only to see a terrifying animation of that thing crawling toward you is awesome! I wish Bendy had stuff like that!
And all the stuff it shares with Bendy are generic things Bendy ripped from other horror games/media anyways. I'm not saying Poppy Playtime isn't inspired by Bendy I for sure think it is but Bendy is such a generic story that somehow fails to do tropes 100 other horror games have done any comparison only makes Poppy Playtime look better.
"It has employees being sacrificed for their company" That is not a concept Bendy invented, literally look at any of the sci-fi horror series Bendy is very inspired by. This is literally a twist in the original Alien.
"It has a scary woman forcing you to do tasks for her" Once again, not a concept Bendy invented, a scary mysterious person forcing you to do fetch-quests is a concept found in tons of horror media. And at least Poppy Playtime gave you a chase with her and let you defeat her, look at poor malice. She's barely on screen for more than 10 minutes before she gets stabbed.
"It has a cult worshipping the monster" This is something tons of horror games and media have done too. I mean In The Tall Grass has a guy who worships a giant magical rock in the middle of a grass maze, Bioshock [which Bendy has only been taking more and more direct inspiration from while failing to grab any of the compelling parts] also had a lot of themes of religion and cult-ish behavior, almost every horror media franchise has at one point done a cult thing.
Bendy couldn't even come up with a reason Sammy worships the ink demon, the best motivation we've ever gotten is just that 'he's crazzyyyy the ink made him insaneeee'. Who is the cheap rip-off here?
At least Poppy Playtime gave their cultist a motive for worshipping the monster + a proper boss fight that feels intense and looks awesome! Bendy didn't even let you kill Malice [she got stabbed in front of you and then just collapsed on the floor how thrilling] meanwhile you get to kill three of the villains in Poppy Playtime and the gameplay and action in those scenes have only gotten better as the game went on.
I mean Sammy walks into a room and goes "AAA SCARY I'M BEING MURDERED" then later shows up and for NO REASON sees a normal human man and assumes it's the ink demon before once again someone else kills him for you. In Poppy Playtime you defeat Catnap as he floods the world with this horrible nightmare-inducing gas that intensifies the color palette and his design. Fight off versions of him that are illusions that you need your flare gun for, then watch in a wonderful animation as he mistakes the monster for his savior before getting killed by it, in a brutal way I might add, which game are we accusing of being cheap, lazy garbage again?
I just find this argument to be people who Really Really need to find a reason to hate Poppy Playtime which I think is silly. The devs being weird, shady people is already enough reason to dislike the game, you don't need to invent reasons why secretly every part of the game is malicious or bad. But esp when I see Bendy fans saying they don't support Poppy Playtime or dislike it bc of its devs or even saying its cringe ummmm.
I have bad news about the fact Bendy's devs are worse and it took not one, but TWO over an hour long videos to cover it all. Plus the Bendy games are just the worse games in every aspect, if I could sell my batim copy for a copy of Poppy Playtime I wouldn't hesitate at all.
Saying this as a bendy fan, we have no right to be super judgy towards Poppy Playtime. If Poppy Playtime is embarrassing cringe, Bendy is too and is way more embarrassing of an interest. We shouldn't spread misinformation just because we all want to hate Poppy Playtime, you can dislike Poppy Playtime without making up a bunch of nonsense to justify it.
Honestly seeing people just blatantly be unfairly mean to Poppy Playtime only makes its critics look worse and makes it hard to take any backlash to the games seriously. Because surprise surprise if you spread misinformation to make a point people will quickly stop listening to Anything you have to say bc they won't trust you're telling the truth anymore.
#feel free to reblog but Im not gonna tag this its way too rambley at least for my taste to go in the main tags#ramblez#also man can I say I didnt want to make this post super long but theres so many other points I could make in poppys favor#the fact we got to see the hour of joy and it was terrifying we dont even know if joey actually killed anyone anymore#the gameplay itself is more diverse and fun then batim which is a walking simulator that pretends to have fighting n stealth mechanics#at least Poppy n Missys friendship gives u a reason to care for missys safety before shes put in danger#Missy can actually express unlike Boris who sits there looking cute with no proper expressions until he gets yoinked and ur supposed to car#bc he was uh adorable? And therefore you spend an entire chapter tryna get him and get an extremely bad boss fight in return-#also soundtrack wise I like poppys tracks more theyre unique and fun and you can tell which part of the game they come from#bendy has so many dramatic reveal stingers and tracks that are really hard to tell which part of the game they come from#bertrums boss fight has my favorite theme bc its so specifically crafted for him and unique and meanwhile Norman has one of the worst imo#a lot of Bendys soundtrack if I played it for you right now it would be hard to guess where its from bc it all kinda sounds the same#the reveal music for the machine for bendy land for heavenly toys for alices domain all sound the same x_x#its just so frustrating but yeah my point is can we all stop making up new reasons to shit on poppy playtime its just kinda dumb#it feels less like actual criticism and at this point just feels like elaborate justification for cringe culture which I hate#okay thats it bye sorry this is 10 pages long-
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blinks tiredly. i decide "hm maybe i should try to expand my circle and step outside of it a little, lets go look at the main community tags" and im just greeted with a bunch of edgelords who think saying "fiction doesn't affect reality, don't like don't read" is peak activism and "fighting censorship". head in my hands. this is partially why i do not ever go into the community tags, my nervous system cannot handle blocking fifty weirdos every single day just so i can have a normal experience in the community tags hfdsjkl
#I HAVE SO MANY PEOPLE BLOCKED ALREADY. i am TRYING to curate my experience 😭😭😭#and i have so many tags blacklisted fjdsjkl like. so many. every single variation of tag to do with those chuckleheads#which helps avoid them a lot of the time tbh bc it'll flag posts that ppl rb if the original post was tagged w any of those#so i can avoid rbing posts that have chuckleheads as the op most of the time#i also usually double check OP's blog before i rb stuff now bc man this place is rife with these weirdos#ANYWAYS. yes i want to try to engage w the community but i do not think i can handle it if theres gonna be so many edgelords jkdslfl#the only way i follow new ppl now is when yall do promo hour and i sometimes see a new face pop up fdsjkl#every now and then i have energy to try to engage with new ppl but its so difficult when so many ppl are such insufferable edgelords !!!!#''im the nasty pr-sh-pper your parents warned you about 😎'' cool man you sound like the most insufferably obnoxious person ever. :/#''if you like CENSORSHIP-'' i am hitting block immediately bc u have a fundamental misunderstanding of what censorship actually is 👍#I'M TIREDDDD WHY ARE PEOPLE SO DUMB ABOUT THIS STUFF. ''fiction doesn't affect reality'' I GUESS PROPAGANDA DOESNT EXIST THEN ????#what a strange world they live in honestly. they dont understand how stories have served humans since the dawn of time. sighing loudly.#vent //#SORRY FOR THIS ONE IM JUST. ARGH. ppl talk abt encouraging community but i think maybe im not cut out for community#i want desperately to partake but i cannot handle it if it means dealing w all these bozos#it frustrates me to no end fdhsjkl and it upsets me so much and i wish i could deal w it better but. my nervous system is broken fdsjkl#i will try to expand my circle every now and then but i cannot do it often bc of this 😭 im not going to give up entirely though fdsjkl#(also this is partially why i dont tag my posts w community tags anymore bc i am just. so scared of these freaks getting their hands on it)#(the most i'll do is s.afeship or variations every now n then bc supposedly they're not in those tags fdsjkl)#delete later#dandyshucks
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how naive of me to think that my december/january cusp will be more chill cause I have less things in my calendar than last year 🌚
#hey ho you never learn something something I know that I know nothing but sometimes I forget that I guess lol#maybe I'm just managing my time bad idk how u ppl do so many things sincerely congrats#(obvs it's mental state + general tiredness also but you know)#i want to write i to ps i want to read i want to watch something#also had a phonecall from a dude i've worked for once before and he is so chaotic and he wants to do another project 👀#last time he called me many (unnecessary) times and then he even called me at 2am to make changes idk if i can go through that shit again#anyway. Hope your second week of this first month of this new year is good and nice and soft to you 🖤
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thought about prjme defenders greyscale arc for longer than 30 seconds
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#sorrry im thinking abt that again. god what the fuck. horror movie.#ros if u see this im sorry youre not at the greyscale arc yet . but holy shit. fuuuuuck#i ahve so many things to say about the greyscale arc. worlds most fucked up 3 episodes ever#hey can we talk about the fact that the greyscale arc is only 3 episodes long. it feels like 20 years.#what the fuck man#william wisp i want to put you in a blender and boil the remaining liquid over my gas stovetop#me watching tokyo ghoul like wow this is just like wjen william wisp [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] and then [REDACTED]#extremely loud dialup tone playing in my brain when i think about kimuri and clarence and mal and ghoul and jason king and emily and#fucuuucucuuckkk#im going to eat microplastics#reaction time#<< kind of. i guess#im not liveblogging it bc im watching tokyo ghoul instead but. now im just thinking about the end of the greyscale arc. in the kitchen.
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i literally only come here when i have a meltdown occasionally lol i miss when i was a happy kid on this account but that will stay where it was made like 3000 pages ago
#i think i have a few thousand pages but im too lazy to check i can only make an educated guess lololol#i remember being so enthusiastic in my posts#now i am DEPRESSED and a total downer LOL#like i had 3 arguments today i totally cried for each one of them too#same person#definitely in prooobably the lowest part of my life. maybe second lowest? im not living out of my car anymore so yea second lowest ig#plus im not actively being cheated on so yea second lowest#still lower in some aspects tho life is shit#ik its morbid to mention but#another#suicide mention#is like i routinely think abt how im going out and its like everyone thinks its so sad and depressing but its such a relief and joyous tho?#i guess the happiness i tie to dying is just depressing to normal people or people who care a little bit about me or just care abt stranger#cuz i get sad when i see strangers tlk about dying by their hand but its also like... i want u to feel relief and happiness n the only way#is dying??? lol#for some of us not all but im like#the type that is so sick of EVERY aspect of life and nothing is worth it. at all lol living and waking up is so mf difficult#breathing is a chore blinking is a chore washing and moving and ugh#then there's jobs and trying to survive and stability and taxes and people who will get you jailed and cause trouble#yea too many layers to life i would rather not#it's not a sad thing tho its just a relief i cannot waaaaait to breathe my last breatg#breath#i hear all these great things about people with NDEs who feel relief and happiness during dying like bruh let me have that
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glad to see that d3 vid made it to you as well because ohmigosh... i've watched it like 6 times already and it's still just as wild and good as the first time. like the way they all had an answer?? imagining them sitting around having conversations about who they'd like to marry on the team - not to mention the way babies were mentioned more than once. these kids are/have been on tumblr and ao3, they know what's up lol
(also side note one of the guys who said mason, he said it was bc mason was a good cuddler which sent me too - so you guys have cuddled. regularly. like WOW.) not even gonna talk about the one who picked his brother though wanting someone to do your taxes is so real
rotating "hopeless romantic + old school" in my mind, like what does that even mean?? flowers and chocolates and kissing you goodnight at your dorm room? does he pull out a chair for you before you sit down? idk, it was such a sweet and genuine answer
tldr i love them all and can we get more teams doing this please? i've never paid attention to d3 in my life but suddenly i need to know more
- @bondedpairs
every time i watch the video i just start laughing so hard, it brings me so much joy and i cannot thank kasper moregraceful enough for bringing it into all of our lives 🥺 *
AND now i get to pitch that i think everybody should watch more college/local hockey to have that type of joy all the time!!! tickets are usually pretty decently priced, you get your narratives right in front of you (my notes app has some. thoughts) and you get the same emotional attachment and watch your guys develop throughout their careers!!! a lot of the time you can find really fun social media for college teams in particularly because of student media programs but if you are not already an ahl watcher: may i recommend stalking their youtube channels. lehigh valley phantoms spelling bee videos are one of my favorite things in the entire world and the milwaukee ads have a lot of fun content too!!
#it’s called having an emotional support ahl fourth liner for a REASON#and the reasons are a multitude#how are you cole bardreau. i love you baby we can get hors d’oeuvres with dinner#hi bestieeeee 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰#anyway lol you caught me after going to said local hockey team and watching them smash god’s favorites 8-3 so i am evangelizing#did i watch them trip and slip slip around the ice yes was it so much fun also yes.#i love my wingies to death and my big teams but there’s also something super nice about being able to go to a game in person (and also saw#a post from the grizzlies [ten out of ten team you should follow them!!! they did a video like this asking who people’s valentines would be#it’s on my blog tagged with the utah grizzlies i think] with one of my guys who just signed there and i was like 🥺🥺 so. in the same vein as#me checking out a book abt minor league baseball that’s gonna break my heart i get really romantic abt semi-pro/pro/college hockey leagues#liv in the replies#ok now to what you actually asked which was like. RPF and to that i say: agreed and i was gonna look up Bryson and the team roster because#i am here for the goalie romanticism plot. i at all times think you should romance your goalie your goalies should be wined and dined#*UPDATE FOR EVERYONE I JUST GOOGLED THE ROSTER AND DO YOU REMEMBER HOW I WASN’T SURE HOW TO SPELL S(H)(E)A(W)N??? YEAH GUESS. G U E S S#I JUST LAUGHED SO HARD TEA CAME OUT OF MY NOSE I CAN’T BREATHE NOTHING COULD HAVE PREPARED ME FOR THIS. TRYING NOT TO WHEEZE &FAILING LIKE#SHJON. HIS NAME IS SPELLED SHJON.#also mason does not in fact have a roster photo. rip they were like actually… that’s our polygamous housewife… also mason already KNOWING#the joey voyles sugar daddy checks out btw. ALSO CANNOT BELIEVE THAT SETH SAID HE WANTED SHJON TO DO HIS FINANCES & SHJON’S THE ONE SAYING#YEAH I’D GET A SUGAR DADDY AND THEN THE GOALIE CALLS HIM A HOPELESS ROMANTIC??? WHERE IS *THAT* FIC WITH THE GOALIE SUGAR DADDY#OK DIJON MUSTARD BOY#anyway i want to daydream in the hopeless romantic + old school world with you… chin in hands kicking my feet giggling… making the goalie#take a magazine quiz with us to see if his crush (shjon) likes him back. mcelroy baby so many other guys would marry you didn’t you hear#AND NOW I NEED TO KNOW THE CORRELATION BETWEEN POSITION AND NAMING UR LINEMATES VS YOUR GOALIEEEE#gonna compile a list of facts about Mason that are just: WAIT ALSO NO ONE ELSE KNOWS THIS THERE ARE TWO (2) MASONS ON THE TEAM!!! i assume#they’re all talking about holler but it should be noted. anyway. Mason: can cuddle good personality would make 7ft babies can color good#colorado mesa university
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i think the majority of the fanfiction ideas i have r always generally "character i like gets a redemption arc" or something similar. i like putting those guys in situations & i like giving them Friens:)
#rambles#i mean they always start out thay way i guess#EXCEPT FOR TWO#id actually love to ramble about the ideas i have but havent written yet/mifht not write#uohgh i feel a bit embarrassed posting this it makes me feel like im uncreative#just dont get writing ideas very often. ah wait i just remembered im human and i can write for fun#i didnt mean 4 that to come off as sarcastic t h#tbh#iiuhvjvvejv i like writing i made this post 2 say i had a writing idea for lmk specifically the spider demons#i really really want to write them interacting and such. ive put them in a situation alright!#sorry my thoughts are getting scattered and messy rn. i want 2 say i like writing and have so many ideas and thoughts all the time#if u would ever like to hear me talk a lot about things feel free 2 send me an ask or something i will love you forever#i just take forever answering them. but thats ok
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