#tw: mentions of grooming

[loony-lupus]

"In chaos, everything is always changing, it's impossible to stay afloat forever. Trust me."

Art by @boggubozakatochnihmashinok ❤️

> She is a former cult leader. The only leader who is not dead.

> Like most creative people, she experiences mood swings and falls into deep melancholy depression, thinking that her "Father" will inevitably destroy Gotham.

> She has a whole host of emotions and feelings, draws inspiration from them, falls into melancholy and laziness, recharges in peace and quiet, loves to read books, really wants to be adored and have friends to hang out with (even though friendship won't stop her from social experiments on her friends and dragging them into a "story")

> Her song: They Might Be Giants - Kiss Me, Son Of God. There is a better song, but it is not in English.

> Her morality and that "host of emotions and feelings" aren't humanly typical though...

> For example, she was genuinely grieving the death of the former cult leader, who grew up before her eyes. Even though he was a psychopath who sacrificed people, slept with his sister, who had a daughter with him, and began to sexually harass his daughter when she grew up. But Annie groomed him in many ways as the FUTURE of their cult. At the same time, she saw him being murdered by his daughter, but she did not intervene anyway, since for her it was CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT of his daughter, and she does not stand in the way of the pure progress of a story.

> I think that she is precisely chaotic - she is capable of both good and evil, but everything depends on her mood and interests.

> "For a hero not to become a Mary Sue, he must suffer."

> She likes love stories the most.

> She can stay awake for days, lost in her fantasies. Sometimes she forgets to eat.

> Because of her non-human blood, she suffers from itch.

> She is older than she looks... but not ancient, haha.

> She usualy don't interferes with her "characters" behavior, allowing them to make their own choices, she only sometimes pushes them to action. She usualy accepts any outcome.

> She's not pure evil, but she's probably my most evil OC of them all (none of them are good).

> She calls her cultists "chickadees" and her fellow test subjects acquaintances and "characters" "children."

> She has a lively sense of humor. When asked in Arkham Asylum how she ended up in there, she would jokingly answer, "I stole candy from a child" or "I refused to ship a popular ship." During the uprisings, while everyone else was causing trouble and destroying everything in their path, she would most likely be painting moustaches on portraits rather than taking active action.

> The truth is, the real reason she was sent to Arkham is even more disturbing and I'm not sure if I should tell it, lol.

> She once convinced a girl to kill her abusive boyfriend by telling her: "When you're hanging over a cliff over a black, impenetrable abyss, and someone's foot is crushing your toes, instead of stabbing that foot with a knife, you desperately wait for the ground to suddenly rise up beneath you." But it was a long story though. So yeah, she sucks you in like a swamp and has a toxic, poisonous influence. This makes her quite dangerous even outside of acts of direct violence.

> I might change something about her later if she turns out to be too tough to handle for me, lol.

[lavenderauthor]

Title: Not What It Looks Like by LavenderAuthor (14.6k)

Rating: Teen and Up

Fandom: Marvel

Relationship: Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Avengers Team Members & Peter Parker, Avengers Team Members & Tony Stark, Pepper Potts/Tony Stark

Summary:  Tony Stark is known as many things: Genius, Inventor, Billionaire, Playboy, Philanthropist, Iron Man. Honestly, nobody doubted any of those even when he started to date Pepper Potts. He was not, however, known for tolerating or even liking kids.

It was just something that everyone seemed to know so imagine Steve Rogers's shock when he comes by Tony's lab with a list of equipment they needed upgraded to find what looked like a teenager in his lab. Even more shocking was the teen chattering away to Tony himself.

[charlie-artlie]

this is so stupid i’m sorry

[a-heart-of-kyber]

*slaps table*

Listen!

There is something super sweet and healing and hopeful about Gale, "I was groomed and still don't realize it and had 'sex' with the Goddess of Magic via mental/spiritual/astral projection regularly. Also, I'm kind of addicted to magic." Deciding to approach you first to flirt with "You being all sweaty after battle is so fucking hot."

Because it's Real. It's physical. Yeah, it's horny, but it's the realization that the mortal realm can be equal to the godly one, if not superior, despite it being different. Like, he's not Losing something by not being with a God and he can heal.

[tables-has-vanished]

I find it funny that crowesfood, a child groomer/child groomer defender, really thinks that turning off comments can stop people from attacking them... anyone know how to use 4chan.... just a little thought.

[proshrimp]

"Look at this anti who hates proshippers cuz one groomed them!!! What an idiot, its their fault"

I'm revoking your proship title, I don't care if you have every single proship belief needed to qualify as proship, you should not represent proshippers even slightly, even on a microscropic level, I'm revoking your proship title you lil victim blaimin shitface.

(I have no DNI other then that if I fit your DNI, don't interact with me.)

[ghxst-system]

"The future is plural" movement from endos is CONCERNING

regardless of the fact they do not believe you require trauma to be a system (medically impossible) this proves they want to groom kids into identifying as endo and spread their medical misinformation further.

as well as causing real systems to believe they dont have it bad enough to be "traumagenic" (the only "genic you can be. this language is bullshit im just using these terms to explain their shit), preventing them from getting real help. they are WIDELY anti-recovery.

their misinformation has ALREADY endangered real systems medically as they have made professionals skeptical of a medically proven disorder, a disorder that is already very stigmatised.

outside of just endogenic misinformation, this statement leads to the idea that they want to traumatise kids to make more systems.

ENDOS ARE FUCKING DANGEROUS

[profic-ient]

"You're reliving your trauma by shipping this!" Idk dude, i think two hot anime guys are not at all similar to my ugly decaying groomer 🤷

[to-coyly-go]

Animator SAD-ist, best known for her DSMP animations such as Hog Hunt, and their admin JayGrahamsNS, have been involved in exposing minors to NSFW content for over 3 years. This was brought to people's attention by former admin zennip.ede, who was directly affected, and admin Skye.

Edit 30 Nov 2024: SAD-ist and JayGrahamNS have also made a response.

Zen's Google Doc:

Zen's tweet:

Google Drive containing all screenshots from the Google Doc:

Moderator Checkers has also decided to come forward with their story.

Checkers' Google Doc:

Checkers' tweet:

[lichenbug]

they drink together often

[feelingemotjons]

STOP DEPICTING FAT PEOPLE AS RICH ASSHOLES

STOP DEPICTING FAT PEOPLE AS LOUD AND "ANNOYING"

STOP DEPICTING FAT PEOPLE AS GROOMERS/PEDOPHILES

STOP DEPICTING FAT PEOPLE AS STALKERS/CREEPS

STOP DEPICTING FAT PEOPLE AS "DISGUSTING" AND "UNLOVEABLE"

STOP DEPICTING FAT PEOPLE AS "ANNOYING" THIRDWHEELS

STOP DEPICTING FAT PEOPLE AS BIGOTS

STOP DEPICTING FAT PEOPLE AS SELFISH AND RUDE

STOP DEPICTING CONFIDENT FAT PEOPLE AS "PICK MES" OR "WEIRDOS"

AND FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP MAKING YOUR FAT CHARACTERS LOSE WEIGHT FOR THEM TO HAVE A "HAPPY ENDING"

[shentheauthor]

PSA for kids on the internet:

I know a lot of y’all look at nsfw content. It’s not good to be in those spaces (because you’re intruding on adult spaces made for adults, by adults, and it’s uncomfortable), but that’s just how kids are sometimes (source: I did that as a kid). It’s inevitable.

The thing is, you should NOT be talking to adults about it. If you break the clear 18+ boundaries people set, that’s YOUR business, and you should NEVER be comfortable discussing sexual topics with adults. I’m being so serious.

It’s never, ever your fault if you’re groomed. The thing is, gross adults will take advantage of you if you make it clear that you are a minor exploring nsfw topics. They see that, and they think you’re an easy target.

As for adults who are uncomfortable with kids seeing their nsfw work, the best we can do is block ageless accounts and minors who announce that they are minors. That’s not enough. You need to keep yourself safe as much as we need to keep you safe.

I care about this stuff a lot. I narrowly dodged a lot of horrible experiences, and it still took me years to deconstruct the harmful things I started internalizing because I was unrestricted on the internet. I got lucky. I can’t say the same for a lot of other people.

Statistically, you will not get lucky if you are a child on the internet. Stay safe.

Also, grooming isn’t strictly for pedophiles. Grooming is when people foster an environment where a vulnerable party (ie children) gets comfortable with an inappropriate relationship. The exploitation doesn’t have to be sexual. It can be an ego thing, or for money, or any number of things. It’s hard to accept that the person you care about is a groomer, and it’s even harder when people fundamentally misunderstand the definition of grooming.

A child can groom another child. An adult can groom another adult. It’s about exploitation, not necessarily age.

Stay safe out there, guys. They don’t teach internet safety like they used to.

[tetric-electric]

tbh I think that the way Ashley Graves is so mischaracterized by the fandom says a lot about how people view grooming (or any type of manipulation) survivors (and autistic people). Let me explain:

Obviously, huge spoilers for Chapters 1 and 2 of The Coffin of Andy and Leyley. This is just a psychoanalysis of Ashley, however to do so involves a LOT of lore.

To start off, I'm just gonna put a trigger warning right here for LOTS of talk about psychological manipulation, as well as neglect and ableism. If you feel uncomfortable reading about these subjects you are more than welcome to click off. Please stay safe.

What made me decide to do this rant:

A few months ago, I got a text from someone who was upset about me having Ashley as my PFP. I was initially like "okay, they don't like TCOAAL, so what", and then immediately after I got a text from them responding to an Instagram story I had basically saying that Ashley was "so me fr fr".

"Let me guess, you also kin Valentino"

Valentino, from Hazbin Hotel, as in the blatant physically + verbally + sexually abusive piece of shit who is in no way redeemable.

I had brushed this off as "maybe they just don't like Ashley", until they listed why.

...all of the reasons they gave fell under the main categories of "she's clingy, she's flirtatious with Andrew, and her sprites are made for the male gaze."

The male gaze thing was because she didn't appear to be wearing a bra. Which like... sexualizing much? For fuck's sake, she's locked in an apartment about to die, do you think wearing a bra would be a priority?

Secondly, her behaviour.

Admittedly, she's not a great person. But that's because she never learnt how to be.

In-game there is so so so SO much emphasis on how she acts childish, and how literally no one gives two shits about her. It doesn't take a professional psychologist to figure out that she never was able to develop properly. That's why she's so clingy, because Andrew is the one person who at least pretends to care about her. And then there's her flirtatiousness.

It's revealed in several flashbacks that the only way she could ever get Andrew's attention is to do something fucked up, as seen by her as a child killing Nina. Andrew then gives her attention for this, which establishes the connection that homicide -> attention, and attention = care and love and affection.

Due to the fact that she never had any friends, she never was able to have any type of love (whether that be platonic, romantic, etc.) reciprocated. Except for Andrew.

Andrew, throughout the game, proceeds to subtly encourage Ashley's flirtatiousness. She has no reference of this type of stuff not being okay, and thus her social isolation made her the perfect target.

Social isolation, gaslighting, coercion, threatening to hurt the person if they don't do the desired behaviour. You know what those are?

Textbook signs of manipulation.

I realized that people hate Ashley so much because since she's not aware of her situation being bad, she's unable to come to that realization. She's not perfect, let alone a 'good victim'. She only sexualizes herself because that's how she learned she can get affection and care.

So... where does the whole "Ashley is autistic" theory come from, then?

As stated by Renee Graves, Ashley was "a lot of work" as compared to Andrew (guess what, kids take work). Now, this alone wouldn't be any indicator. However...

It's shown that she was unable to make friends because she was "weird" and clearly didn't have an understanding of social cues and rules (which honestly hit close to home for me). It's also shown that she problem-solves differently (or at least differently than Andrew, who is seen as the "logical sane one") and also seems to be more of a hands-on learner (I forget if there's any actual proof of this, however upon analysis she is an ESFP, and ESFPs tend to be more hands-on (yes I'm aware that MBTI types are the psychology equivalent of horoscopes, but there is some truth to them)).

Not to mention how she's shown to have extreme emotions, and tends to have meltdowns (I apologize if this isn't the right word, I'm not sure what the term would be). The extreme emotions part can be part of how blatantly of a pwBPD she is, but BPD also tends to have a higher frequency of showing up in autistic people, especially autistic women.

In conclusion, people hate Ashley Graves because of how well-integrated ableism is in society, as well as the concept of a 'perfect victim'.

**Revision (30/12/2024): While I don't think Andrew is a full-on groomer, I do think that he was manipulative towards Ashley. I changed the wording to be more clear of that. Sorry for the confusion, everyone!

[ciderjacks]

The SA metaphors in dunmeshi make me sick because when I think about them for so long it's like... man maybe I relate to Marcille more than I thought, she counts as SA rep to me.

Because during the dungeon lord meeting, seeing all those people talk about how they loved the demon after everything it did, and having Marcille being like "man and all I lost was my desire to braid my hair..." Like Honey, Darling, you shouldn't have lost anything at all. I relate to that mindset so heavily, because I was like that at one point. Sorry if this is a bit much I just wanted to give my two cents

OUGH YEAH. Like especially with how the demon grooming her wasn’t even really allegorical it was just straight up doing that, and it was doing that with the eventual goal of eating her alive… (which is shown to be very much an allegory for SA)

[pastelalleycat]

If allegations of sexual assault come out against somebody:

I don't care if the person seems nice. I don't care if you have a personal bond with them. I don't care if it's something you never thought they'd ever do.

These kinds of allegations always, always, always have to be taken seriously and with the utmost regard for the alleged victim's safety. It's possible that the supposed assaulter may have been falsely accused, but sadly, most of the time, reports of SA are true.

I need you to promise me that you will believe victims when they tell you they've been abused. I need you to use your critical thinking and realize that human beings are capable of causing as much harm as they are of causing good. Please don't turn a blind eye to victims.

[a-a-a-anon]

absolutely fascinated by young dee who is criminally under-discussed so here is my dissertation on what happened in her college years (ft. dr. gainer, setting her roommate on fire, being institutionalized)/my idea for a fic that I will almost certainly never write/my way too serious take on a few throwaway dee lore lines

timeline background: we know that dee majored in psychology ('charlie got molested') and got "three fourths" of the way in (meanwhile dennis finished his psych minor.) assuming this was a four year program, I'm gonna guess that in her third year she got institutionalized and most likely had to drop out ('gun fever too: still hot'.) we also know that she had her back brace until she was twenty ('underage drinking'), so I'm guessing that means she got her back brace off in her third year.

we know that dennis fancied himself a psychologist since he was young, but I think dee did too. in particular I think she was wary and interested in her brother's psychology; she seems very aware of his psychopathy and bpd in 'making dennis reynolds a murderer' and 'psycho pete returns.' in my head she's been interested in dennis' psychology since they were kids and she saw him snapping crows necks. so instead of forcing her way into acting school, she studied psychology to better understand her brother (and also deep down, herself, who is very much the other side of the same fucked up coin.) it also meant she could tell herself she could study her characters even better when she became an actress.

i think she put in (her version of) genuine academic effort to get in, fuelled kind of by spite (remember the way she studied that thick medical book in 'hero or hate crime' or her very quick math in 'boggs: ladies reboot'). she studies books and gets cricket to quiz her and she still fails to get into penn. but frank always pitied her (i think she was his favorite of the twins-remember "let your sister into the gang", "that's my girl!", "i'm sorry the grift didn't work out, sweetie") so he shells out cash to get her in, but also to get her away from home so he has to deal with her even less.

dennis wants to do anything dee does but better and he wants to keep her close by (to watch her crash and burn, and also because he's weirdly possessive-see 'the gang broke dee' "i'm your select!"). and obviously he's barbara's favorite. so barbara gives him money to get in too. she also gets him into a frat and pays for his classes and his rent and everything he needs. dee has to live in a dumpy dorm with a female roommate.

but college presents dee a chance to moult her previous place in life where she was known as a monster (remember how insistent she was that "people can change!" in 'franks pretty woman'. I think dees always wanted to believe she can shed that feeling she's inferior, but she never has). in my head her female roommate is basically normal-has real friends of her own, mentally stable, attractive-which is exactly what dee craves. dee wants to be popular and well liked and she wants to infiltrate her roommates life, imitate her, be in the Cool group. and she places all her hopes on a friendship with the roommate but dee has never navigated real female friendships before, not with someone like her. deep down she also wishes she found what dennis found in mac, whatever it was, because ever since dennis met mac he's never been as close to her. and i do think dee is some flavor of queer. and the roommate is well liked in the way that dee admires and envies. so there is that blurriness between wanting to be her and wanting to be with her. in my head her roommate looks like the woman from dee's fantasy in 'the gang saves the day' (and they both represent that promise of escape from dee's shitty life).

dee is so desperate for the roommates approval and her love and her life that she goes insane, copying and flattering and competing with her. ever the shitty actress, she tries to emulate her, but comes off as manic and creepy. and maybe her roommate is nice enough to not completely shun her, recognizing that she's struggling. maybe in dees mind they actually are becoming friends when her roommate asks things like "are you okay?"

and dee has to talk about her plan with dennis because he's the only person who would Get It. and she makes it sound like it's almost working. dennis feels jealous and worried and threatened that maybe dee might actually be seen as normal, especially when she gets her back brace off in the third year. so dennis fucks her roommate, more of a show that he owns and controls each and every pathetic part of dee’s life than anything else. and so that dee knows she'll never be as good as him, she'll never as easily charm people as dennis does. (or at least he tells her he does).

to prove that To Someone dee is Good Enough, and so desperate for attention, dee (who's been groomed all this time) enters a sexual relationship with her professor dr. gainer. she tells herself she has the power in it, that she seduced him ("he didn't molest me. i had sex with him 'cause i wanted to.") and she has a mental break, because the thing she told herself held her back from being loved (her back brace) is finally gone by now and yet she still feels like a monster, and the only scrap of "love" she can get is from her professor.

and then she can't take the fact that she can steal her roommates clothes, can emulate her sexual prowess (in dee's own fucked up, delusional way), and still neither be well liked like her nor be loved by her. so maybe dee will always be a monster. so dee tried to burn her roommate in her bed, because she represented the promise of change and popularity, and that promise was a lie and dee's effort was for nothing. and she's institutionalized.

and i think there was kind of a falling out between the twins and their parents, because barbara wants to abandon dee but dennis can't help but visit her. and frank doesn't even step foot in a place that reminds him of his traumatic childhood, and avoids dee even more than he used to because she is his childhood mirror image. so the family becomes even more fractured and estranged.

and maybe dee becomes medicated and slowly crawls her way halfway to normal by the first season (her acting classes are so well-adjusted, taking part in healthy hobbies of her!). until her father comes back into her life and everything falls apart <3

side note, even though dee is crushingly lonely-"I just got a cat 'cause I wanted something to hang out with. I don't have, you know, a roommate or anything, and I don't really have anyone to talk to..."-AND she struggles to pay rent whenever frank cuts her off, i hc that she refused to ever get a roommate in particular female roommate again after this because both her internalized misogyny got worse and she was afraid of what would happen (what she would do) again.