#tw drug dependence

[caramellles]

"i just want it to stop."

[septic-skele]

"Blue's not happy about this, y'know," Pike mumbled, a bleary attempt at a grin tugging at his jaw. "Real far from happy, actually. He's probably gonna pull y'aside about it soon, give a d-d-dressing down."

"Stay still and stay quiet. You shouldn't even be smiling right now," Sable chided without looking up from his work, though after a few beats his suspicious curiosity got the better of him, as Pike knew it would. "What exactly is Blue's grievance?"

"This." Pike's hand wavered as he gestured vaguely at their current position: he with his back against the wall, his brother with a knee bearing down on his ribs, an elbow propped against his collarbone and the other hand gripping the crown of his skull to keep it craned at the proper angle. "I heard he an' some of the other sweet puffs think you're dopin' me t'keep me docile."

In his peripheral vision he could just make out his brother’s eyelights flashing briefly but his tone remained icily even. "Really."

"Mhm. S'kinda funny, huh?" A slurred giggle escaped, shaking his shoulders, which urged Sable to dig his elbow further in as reproach.

"Stop that. You're going to hurt something."

"An' that's my point. Even they're fallin' for th' shtick. Got 'em all c-convinced. Cruel master, defiant pet. Like they think I could do somethin' to hurt you or...verse vice." It took a solid five seconds for him to do a double take. "V-Vice verse, I mean. Versa. Etcetera. Et all. Et t-tu."

"Yes, thank you, I think I get the point." The point was that he and his brother were doomed to be misunderstood no matter where they went, no matter who they wished they could trust. Even when it was supposed to be like looking into a mirror, those Sans and Papyrus saw Sable and Pike as nothing but a dirty, unappealing reflection. Was this how Red and Edge felt when they first made contact with the others? How had they overcome it? How did they think of their swapped, fallen selves?

How could he blame them for jumping to conclusions as he pushed this rather alarmingly large syringe further into his brother's jaw? What else could they think?

What else could he do?

"Th' point," Pike breathed faintly, suppressing a shiver as the needle found its way past scar tissue, dust welling around it. "Th' p-point..."

The point was that Sable was doing good by him, no matter how it looked from someone else's point of view; he'd be doing much better if he didn't have to bother. After all these years he really shouldn't have to nurse the stupid babybones who nearly got his jaw ripped off by a mere glancing blow, never healing, only coping, patching, maintaining through whatever means and methods they could find. He was the problem, not Sans, and the others ought to learn the difference, but that was too big a mouthful for too foggy a headspace as the dubiously acquired meds took their course.

Over the next few hours all he knew for sure was the euphoria blunting the edge of the pain was his brother’s doing, and he loved him all the more for it.

[duskoon]

Yandere!Toru x Reader (General Headcanon):

A/n: It ain't a request, but oh god I simp for this man so hard. He is my personal favorite Jojo villain so far, closely followed by Pucci then Valentine. It's shame he is overhated and underrated, so I'll give him the love that he deserves. Rejoice Toru lovers, I got your backs. Also, Jojolion is severely underrated and deserve some love. First Jojo post, let’s go.

Tw: Afab!reader, Jojolion Spoilers, Canon Divergence, Yandere themes, Obsessive/Possessive behaviours, Toxic relationship (Somewhat of a parasitic relationship), Co-dependancy, Stalking (Classic Toru behavior right here), Abandonment issues, Implied murder, Manipulation, Creepy undertones, Age difference (Reader is 25+ and Toru is canonically 87+, rock humans can live up to 120 and age very slowly in comparison to carbon-based humans), Interspecies relationship, Abuse of Authority, Medical malpractice (illegal usage of sedatives), WoU.

Note: Text = “Purple” = Wonder of U speaking.

╭──────༺♡༻──────╮ [Now playing: The Scientist] 𝟙:𝟘𝟙 ─────|───── 𝟝:𝟙𝟘 ↻ ◁ 𝕀𝕀 ▷ ↺ 𝕍𝕠𝕝𝕦𝕞𝕖: ■■■■■□□□ ╰──────༺♡༻──────╯

❦ “Tell me your secrets and ask me your questions..” The lyrics were blaring loudly through his earbuds, as Toru hummed along with it. In the reverie he was engrossed in, he accidentally collided onto someone. Consequently, dropping his phone in the process.

❦ Before the phone could clash with the ground and break, however, a gentle hand took hold of it and rose up to pass the device to him.

❦ “My apologies, sir. I was in a bit of hurry, you see. Please... Find it in your heart to forgive me.”

❦ Soft, yet a kind slant in the stranger’s voice snapped him from his previous stupor. As his mauvish-crimson irises wandered to meet her (e/c) ones before taking his earbuds off.

❦ “A-Ah. You don't need to apologize, miss. If anything, it's me who should apologize. I must thank you for your trouble, though.”

❦ Toru spoke with an alluring tilt in his tone, almost too charming if it weren't for the hollow eyes of his. He was the master of both guises and words. Like a jester that wore multiple masks to appease his audience.

❦ He had lived amongst organic humans for so long. Observing and adapting to their behaviors accordingly. Integrating in, yet never fully becoming one of them.

❦ He could truly never become fully human, Toru was painfully aware of that, even if he wished to be one. It's pointless to pursue such unattainable endeavour, especially if it goes against his inherent nature.

❦ The only way for him, as he thoroughly believes, to be as close to one is by accomplishing something grand. That way he’ll leave his mark permanently. That way he won't be forgotten, nor will his existence amount to nothing.

❦ Looking at the lady, he could see her wearing a navy blue medical scrub and a familiar lab coat. Is she a doctor in TG University Hospital? If so, how come he wasn't notified? He knew everyone there, aside from her. Perhaps a new hire? His curiosity has been piqued.

❦ “How intriguing…” The dark haired man thought to himself, as he shoved both his phone and earbuds into his yellow pant’s pockets. Toru chose to follow behind her. Not too far that he loses her out of his peripheral sight, but not near enough that it alarms her of his presence.

❦ In his eyes, it wasn't stalking at all but rather an observation to be made. After all for the majority of his long isolated life, he has been detached due to his “unique” circumstances.

❦ There’s something that allured him to her, was it perhaps the working of her stand? Was it fate itself? He wants to—no, must know. Yusaho was a means to an end for him, albeit you—for some odd reason—had managed to tug at his rocky heart.

~~~

❦ Due to his nature as a Rock Human… I personally believe Toru would take a long time, before he even realises his affections toward his darling is genuine and not born out of ulterior motives. Unlike, what had transpired between him and Yasuho in the past.

❦ Maybe it was your indiscriminate kindness that had enticed his voracious attention, especially since it was out of good heart, just like how a Venus flytrap secretes a sweet nectar to ensnare an unknowing prey into it’s grasp.

❦ Or by some sheer luck, he had somehow managed to flee the Higashikata’s before they could finish him off. His life was on a single thread ready to fall at any moment, if it weren't for your intervention.

❦ Perhaps you were a miracle worker of some sort that could cure the rock disease; That he had sustained from the equivalent exchange with the Higashikata’s youngest child, or you have a stand that could heal it? It doesn't matter the reason, he doesn't understand why… But he feels indebted to you.

❦ “Urgh.. Hah.. Thank you.. Thank you for saving me..” Toru muttered weakly, looking deeply into your beautiful eyes as you carefully stitched his wounds close to prevent external bleeding. It was beautiful to him. Just like the sheen of rainbow after a long storm. The eyes of his saviour. If you weren't, then one of Wonder of U endless calamities would have already stroke you.

❦ “Shhhh.. Rest your mind, I'll take care of you.. Don't stress yourself. By heavens… what… to… you?” You replied back softly, carrying the injured oddly dressed stranger to your home. Your mellifluous voice—in spite of cutting off—soothed his fears, as he closed his eyes. No longer dreading what Toru thought was his near death, because the dark haired man knows he’ll come back just fine. Your words and actions remained etched into his mind.

❦ One thing for sure… Once Toru comes into terms with his feelings, things will roll so fast and unbeknownst to you. You’ll suddenly feel scrutinizing eyes following you everywhere—whether be it his own (most likely), one of his cohorts, or even his own stand under a guise of a close relative—most likely an older man—of your own. It's not like he had a hand in said relative’s death who may or may not figured what he is up to, it was merely an… accident.

❦ Toru is extremely obsessive, as he is attentive to his darling’s habits and needs and personal preferences to a tee. From knowing ordinary things like their favorite genre of music, videogames, flowers, to their favorite food, and all the way to their medical records (Ex: If his darling’s family—by extension his darling— had a record of a hereditary diseases he’d know, to monitoring their menstrual cycle, his darling’s exact blood pressure and whatnot, and etc..) and other personal information.

❦ Whatever information regarding his darling he will covet it like a greedy dragon that preserve it’s treasures, whether through his status as a head doctor in the hospital or/and as the leader of Locacaca Organization. No one would ever suspect him of doing that, and if they do… Well.. It's a shame that they’ll met a misfortune end, eh?

❦ “Don't worry, sunflower. I will protect you, provide for you, and alleviate any kind pain you have. What kind of lover would I be, if I can't do all of that? There is absolutely nothing that I won't do to guarantee your safety and happiness except if it meant you're going to abandon/replace me. You're my first priority!”

❦ Paired with his obsessiveness, is his manipulative and sly nature. Don't let his playful and laid-back nature fool you. What lurks under his unassuming mask, is a dark and selfish urge to obtain you all for himself. Cut you off from the greedy world, only for his eyes to relish and keep.

❦ With his forbidden knowledge of his darling intricacies and inner secrets, the rock human will emulate whatever you like and would condemn what you hate. However, he is smart enough to share something of his own interests lest you suspect him.

❦ “Toru-san, It’s nice to see you again here! But, why are you here? Aren't you busy at the moment?” You asked; Voice soft, sweet, and innocent unaware of the “young” doctor’s true intentions. You were about to leave your office to head back to your home, but Toru’s sudden appearance has halted you. It's quite surprising that he precisely knew where you had worked, let alone the exact time your shift ended. Must be a coincidence, or is it?

❦ Your ardor and charity was one of a kind. Toru couldn't help but yearn for it, yet he only desires it for him and himself only. It irritates him when you share it with others, but he hides such distaste beneath a veneer of charisma.

❦ After all, he doesn't want you to be scared of him. He wants you to come to him out of your own will, and vie for him like he does to you. He is a patient man, after all. Whatever competitor/s he has for your heart are already taken care off with utter apathy toward their untimely demise.

❦ “I just finished my shift, sunflower.. I came here to ask you.. If you would like to accompany me to the theatre? I heard they'll be playing some of Tchaikovsky works, and I thought about inviting you along since you're a big fan of his works…” The young man offered, seeing your eye light up in excitement and brought a smile onto his unblemished face.

❦ “Really?!” You exclaimed elated, before deflating as you remember your current situation.

❦ “I uh.. really want to, but I… can't go.. Well.. I have a low budget at the moment… hahaha..” You continued shyly, yet that didn't stop the charming man from pointing his pointer finger ontop of your delicate lips almost to shush you in a teasing manner.

❦ “Don’t worry, If money is your concern… Then I can just cover for you! A diligent employee like you deserve a break from work. After all, stress is the greatest killer. Let me relieve some of your burden!” Toru muttered offering his right hand for you to take, while his left pointer finger is still caressing your lips.

❦ “Bu—” Before you could argue back, the dark haired man interrupted you with a playful smirk. “It is no trouble at all, sunflower.. You do not need to repay me with anything. Your presence is more than enough for me.”

❦ He is very lucid about his unhealthy obsession. Instead of rejecting it, however, he wholeheartedly accepts it. Due to his nature, he sees it as normal. Wouldn't you like to be pampered and loved like a pet?

❦ Toru is affectionate, and a tad bit physically clingy. Nothing too alarming at hindsight. Do you blame him? He had been so alone for so long without any connections, and whoever came after him succumbs to his stand’s lethal ability spurring his loneliness even further.

❦ All except you for some reason. Was it your stand that is protecting you? It doesn’t matter. He had a taste of you, and he won’t let you go. Toru refuses to go back to the agonizingly meaningless existence that he had before meeting you.

❦ What triggers him so quickly is the idea of his darling forgetting, rejecting or/and replacing him. It is his primal fear above anything else. You are the only person, who made him think of someone else besides himself.

❦ It’s enough he was rejected once due to his youthful appearance, he won't let that happen again especially with you. He had already latched onto you.

❦ “Ahahah.. Sunflower.. Please don't leave me.. I'll be good.. I'll be what you want me to be.. Just please, I beg you, don't leave me.” Toru dropped on his knees, with his two hands clutching yours tightly in a desperate manner.

❦ To an untrained eyes, you might be in the wrong for breaking this poor man’s heart. Yet, you knew better than anyone how dangerous this man was. How his obsession run deeper than still water. Or in this case, endless stream of blood and death.

❦ If only you knew back then, saving him would lead him to slaughter anyone who came close to you. All in the name of protecting and loving you.. How delusional.. Love begets altruism, not selfishness. Though, you doubt he could comprehend that.. Left completely in the dark about his inhuman nature.

❦ You’d have let him to crumble like dust, but it was far too late for that now. As he brought your hands, to where his heart supposed to be.

❦ It is often said that human response to danger was flight or fight, yet there was a third option that is often forgotten about. Freeze.

❦ Taking advantage of his beloved’s shock, he swiftly administered a sedative into her body. Slowly watching her body fall limp. Before your head could reach the concrete, he held you close to his chest.

❦ “Tell you I'm sorry. You don't know how lovely you are…” The rock human muttered softly, carrying your unconscious body to his “home” that he had bought for you. Away from civilization, just the two of you living together forevermore. The notion that you're dependant on him for everything, puts a smile on his face. He wants to be your world, just like you are to him.

❦ Escaping him is pointless, since the rock human has his connections everywhere. That, and his obsession for you had gone so far, that even his stand has inhibited some of it.

❦ Whenever Toru goes in his habitual sleep cycle like most rock humans do, Wonder of U most likely is keeping watch over you. It's very apparent since disasters and freak accidents follow you like a moth to a flame. It may not harm you directly, but the guilt that eats your mind for being the indirect cause of the bystander’s death will prevent you from trying again.

❦ “I must commend you! Not only were you clever to discover a way through my abilites, yet found a way to run away from my user. However, it's no use fleeing from us… You will only bring calamities to innocent bystanders… You do not wish for that, would you? The moment our eyes laid on you, human, it was preordained for us to be one. It would be best for you to make amends with your fate.”

[spoocys-glade-of-dreams]

Years of trauma, heavy drinking, and hard drugs fragmented a lot of Rayman/Ramon's memories. He doesn't have very many left of Dimension X. He has trouble trying to remember what his own parents looked like.

The only person he really remembers from Dimension X was Globox. Rayman/Ramon assumed he died back in Dimension X.

He has to rely on pictures and stories to help jog the memory.

He latches onto Bullfrog as a friend after the rescue because of how much he reminds Rayman/Ramon of Globox. Bullfrog was hesitant on befriending Rayman/Ramon at first, but they did eventually bond. Rayman/Ramon and Bullfrog becoming close allies and friends.

[mikokyre]

REPEAT AFTER ME

The relationship didn't serve me, so I cut them off.

I will stay strong for myself.

I will defend my needs and boundaries if they don't want to compromise.

I am worth to be cared for. I am worth to make me feel cared for. And if you can't or don't want, I will do it for myself.

Repeat in weak moments.

Don't drink and write your ex. Don't smoke weed and forget about what they have done. Don't fill the void with drugs. Go through those bad feelings so they don't show up again.

[rose-riot-johnson]

Okay my Tumblr Peeps... I decided to write a fanfic about non other than Bleach's very own Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez🐆😁👍It may not be my 1st time writing about him, to be honest, however it's definitely my 1st time writing about him by himself🐆😃👍Any1 who is a fan of Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez, I definitely have a treat for you🐆😁👍I just have so many ideas I have planned for this fanfic about Grimmjow😃👍 Also, apologies ahead of time if Grimmjow's pov, ends up having more paragraphs than the reader' pov (which I labeled your pov), considering this is the first fanfic I will have reader's pov and the character's pov😅

*This fanfic contains 1 or more long paragraphs😅

🩵🐆What Happened To You, During The Nightclub Incident🐆🩵(Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez x Female Reader)

Genres: Angst (Possible Dark Angst) (Warning⚠️: Language, Trigger Warnings Include; Alcohol Consumption, Drugging, Violence, Blood, and Anything Unspeakable Depending On the Reader's Imagination)

The introduction:

You were invited by your friends to go with them to a night club they frequently go to. You accepted their invite, because you really have never been to a night club or any bars before, you were more comfortable going to places with your friends for some reason, and you weren't sure if you would have that opportunity again. You felt like you have known your friends for years, that they're the best friends you had ever had and you figured they're the ones you have your back. You truly trust no one else as much as you trusted your friends, so you believe in your heart that you could never have better friends than the friends you have...

Your pov:

You were already dressed, dolled up, and ready by the time your friends picked you up from the nightclub, your friends took you. You were extremely excited to to be there for the first time ever. You then noticed a man with blue hair and blue eyes, who was smiling at you (while drinking a glass of vodka), however his expression seems to switch after he saw your friends. Your friends told you that he's like this with most people and is a trouble maker, then told you to watch out for him, because they think he's a creep with anyone he likes, not to trust him, and called him a "sexual predator". To you he didn't seem like it, however how can you not trust your friends you figured.

A group of men, then went up to you, as your friends introduced you to the men who are near you. These men also said some things about him, as if they're warning you about him, then one of these men seemingly assured you, "Pay no attention to him! He may start trouble, but we know how to deal with trouble makers like him! Just let us know, if he starts anything with you!", before he seemingly warned you, "If I were you, I'd keep my distance from him!", After they went elsewhere inside the nightclub, one of your friends said, "See? Even these gorgeous guys said this blue hair guy is trouble... But don't worry, (Female Reader Name)..., Then the friend who was talking was encouraging you to dance with one if the other me on the dance floor.

You were having so much fun dancing on the dance floor that you forgot your drink. After you got done dancing with the guy, you went back to where your friends were, as they cheered you on, before drinking your drink. "It's strange... I only took a couple sips of the drink and I'm feeling kinda funny right now...". Your friends then laughed as one of them said, "Maybe because your alcohol tolerance is low and we need to get it up higher...", before the second friend said, "Or possibly you're having such a good time, where you forgot you couldn't handle your booze", as all of your friends laughed before you feel into one of the men's arms passing out and drugged...

Grimmjow's pov:

Grimmjow is an (sixth or shall we say sexta) Espada, type of Arrancar, which is a type of hollow. He would occasionally go to the night club, to have a couple drinks, while trying to keep to himself (despite of his temper), then leave, however the night you went in that nightclub with your friends, he watched you. He sees your friends often when he's there (and he couldn't stand them), however to him there's something about you that is different about you.

While Grimmjow watches you he saw a group of men hanging around your friends, telling you negative stuff about him, as one of these men say, "Pay no attention to him! He may start trouble, but we know how to deal with trouble makers like him! Just let us know, if he starts anything with you! If I were you, I'd keep my distance from him!", as if he was warning you. After they went elsewhere inside the nightclub, they talked to you, as if they seemed like to have your back, then acted like they're encouraging you, as they had you dance with one of the other men on the dance floor. Once you went on the dance floor with one of the other men, it the man who was talking, the rest of the men, and your friends were putting stuff in your drink that appears to be, roofies (short for the actual name, rohypnol), ecstasy, and cocaine, all mixed together right with the alcohol you were drinking and Grimmjow madesure he recorded the whole thing.

The reason why Grimmjow can't stand your friends nor those men you just met, because he has been overhearing some stuff they mean stuff about you and even said about you as they complained, "I wished we could just get rid of her, because why I don't know why in the fuck we're friends with that loser in the first place, besides feeling sorry for her!", then the men would come over look for a "hot chick" to do unspeakable things to and your friends mentioned about bringing you over to the nightclub for them to try laying their hands on you. So, when the night that you came with your friends arrived he knew he had to find a way to get proof, so ofcourse he's going to record your friends true colors with his touchscreen cellphone.

As much as it makes Grimmjow cringe only rewatch and record the whole thing, especially with your friends calling you a "bitch" and a "virgin hoe", then laughing at you from feeling the drugged effect of drinking the beverage your friends and the rest of the group of men put drugs in, before you ending up passed out drugged up into the talkative man's arms, Grimmjow knows he rather not cause trouble until he's done recording, while he sensing your friends take advantage of you by their backstabbing tactics for how naive and gullible you really are with them, and will need some form of solid proof to show you who "your friends" truly are. After he gets done recording, the group of men were about to take you to the ally way, however before they were able to carry you outside to take you to the ally way, Grimmjow went up to the men and began to punch one of the men in the face and knocked him out cold. The rest of the men tried attack him and quickly bring you outside, he pound some of their heads to a bloody pulp, twist a couple of the men's arms, a few he gave them a bloody nose, and he even kicked the talkative man in the balls. When one of your friends tried to complain and the rest of your friends were about to take you outside to dispose of you, by throwing you in the dumpster, Grimmjow scolded, "Don't you dare fucken, do what I fucken think you're about to do as your back up plan! I knew you were terrible friends to your friend who is (Female Reader Name)! However I just didn't fucken know you ladies and those men were in on drugging the kind looking lady! You ladies and those men seem like you're all out to get her! You are basically working with those men who have a history of drugging other women! For all of your actions you ladies have committed, none of you deserve a friend like her! Infact she deserves better than two faced backstabbing jerks like all of you ladies! Every single one of you disgust me! We're leaving and never coming back here!". Grimmjow then carried you in his arm, leaving the nightclub and finding a place to take care to look after you.

The aftermath of the nightclub incident:

As you were waking up, you saw that you weren't in the nightclub with your "friends". You saw you were in an abandoned motel room that doesn't look abandoned, then you saw the blue haired man your friends and the group of men were talking bad about, as if they seemed to warn you. You were frightened and was thinking about trying to run away out of fear, however the blue haired man calmly said, "Relax... You're safe now... From all of the times I heard your so called friends mentioned about you and your name, you must be (Female Reader Name), if I'm not mistaken...", before introducing himself, "My name's Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez... Call me Grimmjow...". You then in a frightened state cried, "Why are you talking about about my friends? And you are the bad man who my friends and those men warmed me about... What have you done to me? What have you done to my friends?". Grimmjow gave you an annoyed and not surprised look as he replied, "What I done to you and what have I done to your friends?! I knew you would believe everything they say! It's more like what those men and your "friends" did to you and their motives! I saved your life! Those friends of your are not your friends and are backstabbers who only took you as a friend out of pity! They even called you a loser and I don't see why they think of you as such! Those men and those who you call your friends are fucken cowards and your friends were even about to throw you in the dumpster after I defended you against those men who were about to do unspeakable things to you!", before handing you his cellphone, as he continued, "And if you don't fucken believe me, you have my permission to see the video of last night! Watch the evidence of your fake friends true colors, while I cook some food for you!".

You watched the whole video, Grimmjow recorded. As you were watching the video, you were horrified at everything he was recording. What your "friends" and those men doing with your drink, everything your "friends" said about you, them laughing at you while you were drinking and you passing out drugged after you were drinking. You ended up shaking wondering if you really are everything your friends said about you or if you could really trust anyone, before you bursted to tears. Once Grimmjow finished cooking, he then went to check on you, as he then said, "I'm truly sorry you haf to see this video for yourself, however I can sense your so naive and gullible to the point where you believe everything they say! I hate to say this... They probably have never been truly your friends...".

You went to hug Grimmjow as you cried on his left shoulder, as you continued to sob, "This is all my fault! If I never had any drinks, then non of this would have happened! If I can't trust my friends, who in the hell can I trust?!". Grimmjow then hugged you, while petting the back of your head, as he replied, "Unfortunately that's life... They're just the wrong friends for you... Also don't blame yourself! None of this is your fault and you didn't know better! Those me and your fake friends are in fault... Not you! Now you know who really are trying to make you their prey... And I get we just met, however maybe we should know eachother better, so we can work on trusting eachother... I will admit... I might be an asshole, but I'm not as heartless, as I seem to be...". After the conversation you and Grimmjow had together, he letted you eat the food he cooked for you that you were able to eat up, to ensure you feel better, considering you were having an upset stomach from what happened to you at the nightclub that night.

After you were feeling all better, you and Grimmjow agreed on letting you live in Hueco Mundo, considering that you would live anywhere he would live in. Despite that he did warn you that Hueco Mundo is a dangerous place to live in considering there are hollows who are extremely strong, mean, and heartless who have no honor, you still would be happy to go anywhere with him, because he saved your life and you knew you would feel safer in Hueco Mundo, than you would bring around those who you thought were your friends. Years after living with Grimmjow in Hueco Mundo, you never looked back, as you felt in your heart, soul, and gut that this is one of the best decisions you had ever made. (Up to the reader's imagination if she does end up having a relationship with Grimmjow)

🐆🩵The End🩵🐆

I will admit I did get alot of ideas for this Grimmjow fanfic and I decided the ideas I have written down for the fanfic, I'm not letting that go to waste and I really had fun coming up with ideas for this fanfic about Grimmjow🐆😃👍Last year, I was going to write a similar idea with a particular Soul Reaper who I haven't written about before, however I cancelled out on a similar idea, because I did procrastinate on some fanfics and haven't continued on with certain fanfics in the drafta such as the fanfic idea I had for this particular Soul Reaper, I wasn't 💯% sure if I could pull off with the similar idea at the time last year, and I basically couldn't keep ideas for this similar fanfic while continuing on with other ideas with it where I letted the ideas for planning a similar go to waste last year. Fortunately ideas for this Grimmjow fanfic came in my head and despite of these ideas going in my head there are alot of inspirations for this Grimmjow fanfic. If I did make any spelling or grammar mistakes I may have rushed the fanfic without reading it thoroughly and stuff, otherwise I did try my best with spelling and grammar while trying to look on spelling with certain words. As for "bitch" or "virgin hoe", I have used the word virgin before, while the words "bitch" and "hoe" I rarely use with writing fanfics, however considering the way I'm writing about the reader's friends, their motives, and stuff, this is 1 of the rare fanfics I have written "bitch" and/or hoe in. As for Grimmjow, I really wanted to write something about him. Months before I discovered Tumblr, I grew fascinated with Grimmjow😃👍I just knew there's something to like about him. To be honest, I just like him, with or without any reasons🐆😁👍As time went by, I have found out there are other people who like him, which I'm really happy about🙂 I also have been thinking about possibly writing another Grimmjow fanfic or so somewheres in the future, even if it's near future🐆😃👍Anyways my Tumblr Peeps, I hope you enjoyed this Grimmjow fanfic I have written 🐆😁👍

[ssecond-hand-faith]

Doctor Zachary Ngo here to administer your meds 💊

Don’t worry, it’s just something to help you relax 😌

Zack belongs to @trashpandazowo

[imabiscuitinthousandworlds]

Doing research for my presentation, translating the weirdest niche stuff. Like "FDA approval" and various types of opioids/opium-based medications and drugs. Well, some time in I realise that I've said the word opioids like ten times in a row constantly before. Turns out I did a really similar presentation three years ago. (Not similar enough to copy, but, y'know.) Guess sometimes you just return to certain topics.

[incorrectquotesideas-deactivated]

Person A: Do you want a beer? I’m paying.

Person B, going through the restaurant’s menu: No. Ugh, where’s the good stuff?

Person A, half jokingly: I thought you were an alcoholic.

Person B: Exactly. I’d need at least, like, four beers — without food — to get slightly buzzed, and my stomach can’t fit over 2 beers in it. I’m small. I’ll have a rum, neat.

[clickbeetle]

oh yeah at my high school reunion the other day, one of my old friends from back then said he’d hook me up with shrooms if i wanted to reconnect with him.

i have never ever done shrooms but i mean hey. don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.

[itsbrucey]

Trying to invest myself in my reading by making it about DnDads but then I get horrifically sad bc it's a SUDP textbook

[wcshedup]

why can’t barbie just get clean ?? it takes 96 HOURS to detox fully from h8.

[bipolar-moon]

I'm losing my mind.

Been suffering from benzo withdrawal for almost 2 months now. I think. I stopped counting.

Starting tapering by 1/8 of a mg on March 1st. I decrease the amount every 2 weeks. I'm not at the point where I'm almost completely off of it. Only a few days left.

So far, I've experienced:

agitation

irritability

increased anxiety

flu-like symptoms for a few days after about 3 weeks of tapering

muscle tension

mild nausea

muscle jerking

restless leg syndrome

probably other things that I'm forgetting

those last 2 symptoms (#9 not included) are the most prevalent right now. The only real reason I'm writing this is because my phone is updating and I don't have anyone to talk to about this. But I NEED to talk about this, even if it's just to myself in journal form. and I'm currently being driven up the wall by the nerves in my right leg. It feels like electricity is shooting around my kneecap and down to my ankle. This is the most uncomfortable I've been since the early withdrawal symptoms.

Early on I found someone via Twitter who has gone through the same thing as me, and I've since adopted her as my "sponsor", for lack of a better term. She's been very helpful. I feel very lucky to have her help me along this journey.

This is the second time I've attempted to taper off klonopin. The first time I failed after 2 weeks. About a year and a half before that, I had experienced pretty bad withdrawal symptoms after running out of meds for 36 or so hours.

I'm tired of these symptoms. They're not nearly as bad as I was expecting, probably due to tapering so slowly. But it's still hell.

As I sit here, super uncomfortable, moving my leg every 30 seconds to feel the least bit more comfortable, I remind myself how easy it would be to just take my previous full dose and have all of this over with. Just go back to normal. Sure, I'd become a slave to this drug again, but I'd have my sanity and my comfort back.

I've been on klonopin for 7-8 years. I didn't want to get off of it. My psychiatrist insisted. I thought about getting a new one. The long-term effects scared me, but so did the withdrawals. Now I'm in limbo. I have been since March 1, 2023. I'm frustrated.

To give up is so tempting.

[walkeddeath]

because it's constantly living in my head: gen has weird blood like it's not human . so if a monster / creature or whatever y'know, decides to nibble or have a taste it's roughly equivalent to medical grade sativa or in some cases can be akin to lsd. do with this what you will.

[carmenhearst]

"You'll meet her, she's very pretty even though sometimes she's sad for days at a time."

Is that CARMEN HEARST? A JUNIOR originally from LOS ALTOS, CALIFORNIA, they decided to come to Ogden College to study PRE-MED. They’re THE SOCIAL BUTTERFLY on campus, but even they could get blamed for Greer’s disappearance.

"You'll see, when she smiles, you'll love her."

STATISTICS;

BASIC INFORMATION;

full name: carmen ortiz hearst. nickname(s): car; carm; carmie. age: twenty. date of birth: october 12th, 2002. zodiac: libra. hometown: san simon, mexico. los altos, california. current location: ogden, new hampshire. ethnicity: mexican. nationality: mexican. gender: cisfemale. pronouns: she/her. orientation: biromantic & bisexual. religion: christian. occupation: student. language(s) spoken: english, spanish, french, semi-fluent mandarin.

FAMILY;

father: eduardo ortiz. born may 13th, 1966. charles hearst. march 1st, 1974. mother: carina ortiz. born november 27th, 1971. olivia hearst. january 8th, 1977. sibling(s): n/a. children: n/a. pet(s): n/a.

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE;

face claim: fiona palomo. hair color: dark brown to black.  eye color: hazel. height: 5'3''. weight: 112 lbs. tattoos: n/a. piercings: lobes on either side.

PERSONALITY;

character trope: the social butterfly. additional tropes: the artist, the caretaker, the demure, the gregarious, the mccoy, the princess classic, the philanthrope, the pristine, the reticent, the studious, the sweetheart, the timorous, the viscerotonic. character inspirations: chrissy cunningham (stranger things), iris (the holiday), juliet (romeo + juliet), kiki (kiki's delivery service), louisa clark (me before you), ofelia (pan's labyrinth), riley matthews (girl meets world), rory gilmore (gilmore girls), rose dewitt bukater (titanic), sofia (outer banks), wendy beamish (st. elmo's fire). positive traits: intellectual, sincere, idealistic. negative traits: codependent, naive, disorganized. skills: translation, communication, art. smokes: no. drinks: socially. drugs: yes.

SCHOOLING;

attending; ogden college. major: pre-med. sports: cheerleading, equestrian. extracurriculars: pre-med society.

BACKGROUND;

TW: drug dependency/use. ● Carmen was adopted as a toddler by Charles and Olivia Hearst, a couple from the upper class that had more interest in having a child they could brag about than merely having a child. ● She spent most of her childhood and life in classes of one kind or another, either expanding her brain or expanding her skill set. ● Between classes, recitals, pageants and family's functions, Carmen was nearly always on display and knew she had to present as such. ● Despite the endless schedule she was expected to maintain, Carmen always seemed to find time to reach out and talk to people around her, genuinely interested in the people around her and their stories. ● Her once lively personality was slowly withered down due to the exhaustion of rising to expectations and when she was only fifteen, her mother encouraged the use of stimulants. This has continued and become a dependency issue even though she neglects to acknowledge it. ● Finally away from home, she's experiencing some freedom but still doesn't know how to break out of her parents expectations.

BIOGRAPHY;

TW: drug dependency/use. The memory of her parents can hardly be considered as such, the images in her mind much more akin to attempting to remember the dream you had just been stirred from than seeing a picture of your past. The only thing Carmen knew for sure? Her parents loved her. A reassurance repeated time and time again by her nanny, words that were surely about her birth parents rather than her adoptive ones, whose presence was less commonplace than the woman's own. Charles and Olivia had always wanted a child. Or perhaps, more accurately, they had always wanted trophies — the biggest and best of everything that they could grasp onto, that they could put on display for those around them. Carmen was merely a more concrete piece that they could attribute to their greatness. The second they had welcomed her into the family was the second she was growing, a schedule crammed with whatever might help push her towards success; if she wasn't expanding her mind, she was expanding a skill. Classes, recitals, pageants and the older she got, the larger the list of events she was expected to be in attendance with her family for. The normalcy of a childhood spent making mistakes and getting into mischief not one that Carmen had been afforded. Despite the endless parade of events that filled her calendar, it never seemed to take away from the initiative Carmen had always had to reach out to the world around her. It seemed to not matter if it was a teacher, a classmate, a family friend or merely the employee of whatever business they had wandered into — Carmen seemed unable to keep herself from asking about their day, about their life. There was a genuine warmth and interest in people that even her parents money couldn't have afforded to teach, yet they made sure to harness it in whatever form worked best for them, ushering their daughter in the path of whoever's good graces they were attempting to win. However, expectations did not come without their drawbacks, withering down a once lively girl with exhaustion she shouldn't have while merely a teenager. It didn't go unnoticed and unluckily, it wasn't unknown territory for the Hearsts. She was only fifteen, in a dressing room before a pageant when her mother first gifted and encouraged the use of stimulants. It was the start of a dangerous path, leading to dependency that has followed her like a shadow, dependency that Carmen has yet to face the seriousness of. After all, what reason should she have to worry when her own mother had assured that so long as one didn't overdo it, there was no real harm. It was no surprise to anyone when Carmen graduated valedictorian, nor was it a surprise when she got her acceptance and made her way to Ogden University, Charles' Alma mater. It had never been a question to those around her just as it had never been a question for Carmen. There had never been thought or consideration for her own desires, for her own passions and wants out of life. Even now, Ogden may have opened a door for her, may have been an escape for the home that had suffocated her for the entirety of her childhood — yet the expectations lurk overhead like a storm cloud threatening to swallow her whole.

EXPAND ON HOW THEY EMBODY THEIR SKELETON TROPE;

The social butterfly, dynamic and charismatic, floating about so that you may always see her but never catch her. Carmen was outgoing even as a child, wrapping herself around anyone who would grant her their time and attention. It was an energy carefully sculpted over the years, taught how best to use that openness to charm the world around her, to make them feel welcome and seen when within her space. What she has yet to realize is the many ways in which this piece of her is both a blessing and a curse; the ability to seemingly adapt in any social situation, to befriend anyone around her coming without the knowledge of how to set boundaries or put herself first, how to distinguish who was actually worth investing her time in.

RELATIONSHIP TO GREER;

Like a moth to a flame, it’s hardly a surprise Carmen was pulled into Greer’s orbit — the girl with an interest in everyone and the girl who held everyone’s interest. It was unlikely that the two wouldn’t cross paths, wouldn’t exchange pleasantries from time to time, but what Carmen could have never anticipated was the friendship that formed. She had become used to a surface level of camaraderie in her peers and little more, yet it felt as if Greer mirrored the attentiveness that Carmen displayed for those around her, that she genuinely cared to know more about her. It’s only with Greer’s disappearance and the rumors that have spun in it’s wake that she’s been left to question the sincerity of their bond, to wonder if either of them had actually cared about the other or if they were merely displaying the manners they had been taught.

LINKS;

AESTHETIC | FASHION | INTERACTIONS | MUSINGS | PINTEREST | VISUALS

[deepfriedseagullfeet]

SIGHS i think i should take a tolerance break from weed cause im nervous about my tolerance and i want to be responsible and careful and all that. but according to the internet the best amount of time to take is a MONTH