#tuna-chan

[starryxm00ns]

tuna-chan goes on a swim...

my first art fight attack this year! hopefully i have time to do more. :'>

here's my acct if anyone's interested!

[larkawolfgirl]

Other Fish in the Sea (KKM)

Rating: General Audiences Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply Category: F/M Fandom: Kyou Kara Maou! Relationships: conrart weller/tuna-chan | maidmer princess, Drag Queen Librarian (Stewart)/Tuna-Chan | Maidmer Princess Characters: Tuna-chan | Maidmer Princess, Conrart Weller, Cecilie von Spitzweg, Gwendal von Voltaire, Drag Queen Librarian (Stewart) Additional Tags: Dating, Matchmaking, Break Up, family pressure, Interspecies Relationship, novel canon, Mild Humor

Summary: Tuna-chan had a habit of getting caught in nets, but Conrad never intended to tie her down.

Read on ao3

“So,” his mother began, sounding overly chipper, “have you decided on a wedding date?”

Conrart’s head throbbed with a headache. This had been happening more and more of late. If he wasn’t careful, he might grow forehead wrinkles as deep as Gwendal’s. Since returning to Luttenberg, he had been spending more time with his family, although when the conversation went in this direction, he wondered why he bothered visiting as often as he did. Messaging his temple, he answered coolly, “As I have said before, we are not engaged.”

His mother’s red-painted lips pouted. “Aw,” she whined dramatically. “Why not? She would make a great match.”

Conrart sighed. Just because she was a princess and technically a fellow mazoku did not make her a great match. Besides, Conrart had no intentions of getting married in the first place. As usual, his own frown directed itself to his older brother. This was all his fault, after all, for deciding on his own that the two of them were engaged.

“I hardly even know her.”

His mother waved her hand dismissively. “Pish posh. You’ve been seeing her for what now? Four months? That’s plenty of time to get to know each other.”

Maybe for her, the queen of quick marriages. He heaved a sigh to clear his thoughts. He never enjoyed judging his mother when she at least had tried to make her marriages last. “Neither of us wish to rush things.”

“You don’t have to,” his mother said, unrelenting in the course of the conversation. “You could plan for a year or more from now. All I want is a timeframe.”

“I think all of our minds would be put at ease knowing that you plan to settle down,” his brother added.

Why did they both insist on putting this pressure on him? Hadn’t he already settled down in Luttenberg, for the most part, since beginning his relationship with Tuna-chan? Were they really that worried that he would take off to some foreign country on some whim? At least Wolfram did not give him such pressure. Although, his youngest brother did not seem to give an ounce of concern about what he did one way or the other. His lack of pressure would be more appreciated if he actually ever saw him, yet his brother was almost permanently holed up within the confines of Bielefeld as of late, presumably in order to avoid him.

Conrart forced a smile. “Yes, well, my own mind would not be.”

Gwendal’s ever-present frown intensified. “Could you not be happy?”

Could you be happy stuck with Lady von Karbelnikoff for every day of your foreseeable future? But he chose not to rub salt into that wound. “I am already happy,” he said instead. It was only a half-lie. He was, he supposed, semi-happy. He was as happy as he assumed he was likely to be.

Tuna-chan was nice. She was the most interesting person he knew. She was fun to be around. She appreciated his jokes. And best of all, she didn’t put any pressure on him. Wasn’t that enough?

His mother smiled, but he could tell she was not impressed by that answer. “Please just consider it. She would make a wonderful bride.”

She would be an interesting bride for sure. He could imagine her standing there at the altar with him wrapped up in a dam, white towel. She would need help holding it in place, so Stewart (because he honestly couldn’t imagine her trusting anyone else to help) would be standing directly beside her as they exchanged wedding vows. It was practically comical. Although, he supposed, they could marry in the ocean or along the beach shore. Anyway he looked at it, the idea seemed overly complicated and entirely unnecessary. As far as he knew, Tuna-chan’s own family did not seem to give a dorsal fin of concern about the two of them tying the knot.

Still, in order to appease his mother and brother for the time being, he said, “I will consider it.”

Squealing, his mother jumped out of her seat and hugged him. Not just any hug either, but one of her token face-in-her-bosom hugs. She was definitely pleased with the idea. He would have sighed again if he could have breathed well enough to do so.

Conrart had had enough. He liked Tuna-chan, but he did not like her enough to live with a constant headache, and he certainly did not like her enough to up and marry her. He doubted she liked him enough for that either.

While Tuna-chan had a habit of getting caught in nets, she was practically as much of a free spirit as he was. She belonged to the vast ocean and didn’t deserve to be tied down, neither to him nor the politics Gwendal seemed so intent on thrusting onto him.

Still, the idea of breaking up with her did not sit well with him. He felt bad that his reasoning was almost entirely due to the pressure of his family. The only other reason was that she was technically , not-so-technically, another species, which was something he definitely did not want to bring up since he knew it made her self-conscious.

He did not want to end on bad terms. If possible, he’d like to still see her, if only every once in a while. He figured even if she initially felt down in the waters, she would forgive him in time. Still, he wondered if setting her up with someone else would alleviate that initial sadness. After all, he never liked to see a woman cry.

Setting her up shouldn’t be hard. She and Stewart were close, closer than even Conrart and her were. They had known each other for a long time, by the sound of it, and had been swimming around each other the entire time.

Plan made, Conrart went to visit them at their home. Technically, it was Stewart’s home, but Tuna-chan boarded with him when she wasn’t off at sea. She may or may not have hinted at wanting Conrart to offer to put her up at his place, but even that felt like too much commitment to him. Or more accurately, too much of an impression of commitment. He had never wanted to give her the wrong idea about their relationship. Especially after his brother had to go and mention marriage the first time they even met.

Conrart knocked twice on the front door before opening it. “It’s me,” he called out as he stepped inside.

As expected from a librarian, Stewart’s home was littered with books. Bookshelves practically lined every wall, and stacks of books filled what spaces they could. Still, somehow the man managed to make everything appear neat and organized. There were visible wet splotches on the floor that led up the stairs. That is where he would find Tuna-chan, then.

Leaving his shoes by the door, he followed the wet trail up the stairs and to the bathroom. Knocking again on this door, he opened it. As expected, Tuna-chan was lounging in the bathtub. Her ever-stunning legs were protruding over the rim. The librarian was seated on a wooden stool pulled up close to the edge of the tub. He was reading a book that he had positioned near enough that she could see its pages.

At the sound of the door opening, Tuna-chan began to flop inside the tub causing water to splash around. It was as cute as always.

Stewart closed the book and met his eyes. “Hello, Conrart.”

“Hello, Stewart,” Conrart returned. He walked over to the bathtub and placed a hand on one of Tuna-chan’s stunning legs. Of course, it would have been more proper to touch her fins, but her legs were easier to reach, irresistible, and she never seemed to mind. “And hello to you gorgeous,” he greeted her with a flirtatious lilt.

She splashed about in response. An obviously happy gesture.

Stewart, as usual, wore a mixed expression. Conrart assumed he enjoyed seeing her happy but was annoyed that she was happy because of Conrart instead of him.

Ignoring the man for the time being, Conrart smiled at her. “Did you miss me?”

Another happy splash.

“I hope you’ve been doing well.”

“She has,” Stewart answered for her. “We took a swim at the harbor. Her father sent us an envoy requesting that she return home in a few days, though.”

That would make things easier then. “I see.” Conrart squeezed her leg. “I have been in contact with my family as well. They will still not drop discussions of marriage.”

This time her reaction was a splish. A far less enthusiastic response.

“I know,” Conrart continued, “I do not wish to marry either.” He ignored the scowl he could feel coming from Stewart. “However, I have come to the conclusion that they will not give up on the matter. Therefore, I think it would be in our best interest if we stopped seeing each other as often.”

A sequence of splishs this time.

There was a scraping sound as Stewart rose quickly enough to scoot the stool backward over the tiled floor. “Now, hold on a minute! You can’t do that to her!”

Conrart’s gaze shifted to him, becoming less pleasant in the process. “And why is that?”

“Because she has done nothing but care for you.”

Conrart let go of her leg and laughed almost mockingly. “That does not entitle her to my company.”

Stewart glared at him. “Then what does? You’re a right asshole.”

Conrart rolled his shoulders. “Maybe I am. Regardless, she does not want to marry me any more than I want to marry her.”

Stewart looked a bit at a loss at that. “Still,” he continued heatedly, “that doesn’t give you the right to just dump her.”

“Why not? There are plenty of other fish in the sea.”

Stewart growled before tackling Conrart to the ground. Tuna-chan floundered about in the bathtub trying in vain to jump out to interfere in some way. Both men ignored her, focusing solely on wrestling to pin the other down. Eventually, Conrart allowed himself to be bested.

Stewart sat on his thighs glaring with what could only be regret buried in his eyes. “I wish I’d never entrusted her to you back at the bar.”

“Why not?” Conrart asked with feigned hostility. “What else would you have done?”

Stewart shook his head. “I don’t know. I had to get out, but I shouldn’t have let her go.”

Now they were talking. “You let her go all the time.”

Stewart’s face contorted. “What are you talking about?”

“How many times have you caught her in your net only to let her swim away?”

Stewart gripped at the collar of Conrart’s shirt. “What are you even getting at? That’s always been an accident. I could never keep her against her will.”

Conrart smiled. “What if you didn’t have to?”

Stewart’s hands shook. “What are you getting at here?”

Conrart’s voice came out soft now but loud enough to make sure that both of them heard. “She chose to live with you, right? You understand the maidmer better than anyone I know. More than me, I think you would be a perfect match.”

Instantly, Stewart let go of him to cover his mouth. The man’s face flushed a deep red. “I couldn’t possibly.”

There was splashing from the tub.

“She’s happy,” Conrart said.

Stewart looked over at her with longing. “But she’s a…she’s a princess. I’m just a librarian.”

Conrart grinned. “No, you’re not. You’re also a drag queen.”

Stewart turned back to him and knocked him over the head. “You really are an asshole.”

Conrart’s head ached slightly from the blow, but his smile didn’t waver. Tuna-chan seemed very happy right now. “Yes,” he answered her, “I would still like to see you. Just not enough to give the impression to others that we are courting.” He looked back to Stewart. “That is, as long as you won’t interfere with that.”

Stewart’s face was still flushed a deep red. “I…It isn’t as if I’m courting her,” he denied.

Conrart smirked. “That’s a shame. You might want to get to it before someone else catches her in their net.”

If possible, the man’s face flushed even darker.

Tuna-chan, on the other fin, flopped about merrily. Apparently, this really had been the best outcome. She seemed happier now than he’d ever seen her. It seemed, there was a reason she had gotten caught in Stewart’s family’s nets all these times.

“Good.” Conrart wiggled his way out from under the librarian. “I will let you two celebrate. Although, Tuna-chan,” he placed his hand on her leg once more, “may we have one last official  date tomorrow?”

She splashed in obvious agreement.

The colors of the sunrise glittered over the shining surface of the water. It was beautiful, nearly as beautiful as Tuna-chan herself. Conrart swam closer to her. “Are you enjoying yourself?”

She splashed several times.

Conrart snorted. “Of course.” Saying this, he leaned in.

Their mouths met with a kiss. It was a sweet, but lingering kiss. This wasn’t a kiss with implications, although it wasn’t just a kiss of sentimentality either.

Breaking apart, they both dove under the water. Conrart grabbed onto her closest fin to make sure they didn’t get separated. They dove deeper and deeper, pausing to kiss every so often. With each kiss, Conrart was granted life-giving air as well as a tender feeling in his chest.

Finally, he could see the looming underwater city. Other maidmer swam to and fro. Speeding up, Tuna-chan led him to a large castle.

Two guards blocked the way, but upon seeing the maidmer princess they moved aside. The two of them swam down a seemingly endless, empty hallway until finally entering a room. It was lavish with a giant clam bed, dangling seaweed lanterns, and coral artworks. Conrart wasn’t knowledgeable enough to know what fancy looked like underwater, but he assumed this was it.

Putting two and two together, it wasn’t hard to figure out that this was her bedroom. And by the way she was tugging him toward her bed, it wasn’t hard to figure out why she brought him here either.

Conrart wasn’t ready to settle down. He certainly wasn’t ready to marry a maidmer princess.

But Conrart was always ready to bed one.

[desperatepleasures]

Title: The Wide Open Shore

Words: 12,098

Rating: M

Pairings: conrad/crossdressing librarian, tuna-chan/crossdessing librarian

Warnings: Interspecies relationship/sex, light recreational drug use

Summary: Conrart returns to Luttenberg to see someone he's been avoiding.

[tunapotatobangchan]

Worry not if Bang Chan's eyes have strayed towards yours, for he is riding a can of tuna to come to you in your dreams. The preparation to get him, to fly to you is making a pentagram out pf potatoes and singing skibidi toilet as loud as possible at 2 AM

[yooboointhemood]

Super Tuna X Taller than you X God of light music

( the trio that nobody thought would be friends but they are and they are better than you and they know it.)

Or

(A fisherman, a girl who lies that she's 5'5 and Pi Cheolin are here to take over K-pop)

[desertsandsnstarrysky]

leopard Israel! Because we need a cute cat girl in hetalia...

And she's so ferocious in this form! Gao!

(i wonder if Tumblr will allow me to keep the kitty Israel on here...

I've been painfully trying to work on these whenever I'm able to charge my old phone, because let's face it... I hate working on my iPad for artwork...I've had these sitting in my old phone since thanksgiving and I just never finished them... These take way too fucking long..)

But yeah... Miau Miau! Gao! Queen of leopards, let's fucking go! 🐆💙🤍

(which outfit by the way do you like better? One is way more risque~ totes can see that kitty fluff downstairs..)

[omnivorouscinephilia]

The Creator: Do Soldiers Cry Over Mechanical Bodies

I did not much care of the latest from Gareth Edwards, the techno-orientalist war film The Creator. Far from an original film, it is one of the more trope laden works I've seen in a while. Check out my review of the film here.

Thirteen years ago, Gareth Edwards, at the time a special effects artist with aspirations of becoming a director, spearheaded his debut feature as a writer/director, Monsters. Operating as a travelogue of a world transformed by giant monsters with a budding romantic couple as the perspective characters, the film has a guerilla charm to it, with on-location filming, striking visual compositions,…

[134340am]

goob morning pals! : ) i slept in a little and now i’m eating breakfast, which is french toast and some tea 😋

[roseykat]

KINKTOBER DAY 14

TITLE: Some things are better left unknown

PAIRINGS: Bang Chan x Felix x reader

WARNING: minors DNI with this post or my blog. I create NSFW SKZ related content and I know I won't be able to regulate every single interaction with those posts so please do not engage with my work or page whatsoever.

SUMMARY: a threesome with Chanlix where you’re yet to discover a very sobering truth about the pair of them.

TAGS: explicit language, threesome, oral sex (f!reader receiving), porn with plot, use of the name 'baby girl' and 'angel', swearing, multiple orgasms, unprotected sex but protected anal sex, double penetration, big dick!Chan agenda, praise, slight body worship if you squint, kissing/making out.

A/N: Aussie line fucks hard, bye. (If there are mistakes, I will fix them. Currently running on v low sleep)

KINKTOBER23 - MASTERLIST

TAGLIST: @mal-lunar-28 @luneskies @queenmea604 @kibs-and-bits @kbitties @aaasia111 @fairy-lixie @dreamingaboutjisung

-

Milk, nori, rice, raw tuna, coffee, yoghurt, bread, and eggs. 

This was all Chan sent you to the supermarket for. All of which could have been easily picked up from the convenience store down the road. Maybe minus the raw tuna which has to be high grade since Chan wanted to make an attempt at onigiri for the first time. However, you would’ve saved an entire trip to the busy supermarket.

Not to mention, grocery shopping sucks in general. At least that is when you’re on your own. In your apartment that you share with your good friends Chan and Felix, two people are responsible for the shopping per week which rotates each time. 

If you’re with Felix, sometimes you both tend to muck around. Not to mention forgetting almost a quarter of things on the shopping list which ends in a stern lecture from Chan. On that matter, if you’re with Chan, it’s an in-and-out task at the store in less than ten minutes. 

Efficient and practically timeless.

Even though it’s no trivial matter, you manage to get through the pointless shopping before heading home to the apartment. These could’ve been picked up at the convenience store, you think to yourself again. A sigh leaves your lips as you unlock the door, bumping it open further with your hip as you slide your shoes off. 

“I’m back. Remind me to buy an umbrella next time-”

Your body freezes on the spot. The bag of items falls from your possession, collapsing onto the floor. Something inside it broke but it’s nowhere near enough a distraction for what is in front of your eyes. 

Maybe you need your vision checked because if your eyes weren’t deceiving you, then you wouldn’t have just seen Chan and a topless Felix who are both making out. The two of them sat on the edge of the bed, still lip-locked until they caught onto your presence.  

For the few seconds you stood there, rooted to the ground, felt the absolute longest.

Neither of them was as internally panicked as you when they noticed you standing there. Nor did they have hundreds of questions zapping around their brains in the span of a few seconds. It was like your entire vocabulary had turned to dust and were blown away because there were no words to describe what the hell was happening. 

Maybe it was a dream. 

“T-That was quick,” Chan stammers with an awkward chuckle, breaking away from Felix, almost pretending like nothing just happened. 

Felix looked like a complete mess. Dark brown hair mangled - clearly from Chan either running his fingers through it or tugging it - the air gets stuck in your throat with those two theories in mind, painting very interesting visuals and an odd sensation in your stomach. 

Chan looked equally dishevelled. There’s a dark red splotch peeking above his collarbone that you had no trouble guessing how it got there. On top of that, his pants were already half undone, and his lips were bitten red and wet, and they both looked so…so…

“What…the fuck…” you manage to speak once your mind has cleared the only one per cent of its capacity to grasp the circumstances.

“It’s not what it looks like,” Felix quickly says as he stands up from Chan’s lap and walks over to you.

It was useless for him to try to take advantage of your shell-shocked state because once your surprise had completely thawed out, your words started coming back to you. 

“Oh my god, what am I even doing?” You ask, clamping your hands over your eyes, ready to head right back out of the apartment. “I’m heading out.”

“Wait!” Chan calls out, arm outstretched towards your direction. “You don’t…you don’t have to go. If you want, you can maybe join us. If…if you like.”

Join them? Blindsided by those words, there was no trouble for the difficulty you had in trying to figure out if you heard right or just imagined what Chan said. Why would he ask you that question? But more importantly, why were they hooking up in the first place? It was evident that there had been something going on between Felix and Chan - unless this was just a new one-time thing. 

However, even if it wasn’t, you had been left out of the secret. Nonetheless, you quickly came to your senses. Whether they hook up or not is none of your business. 

“J-Join you?” You stammer. 

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” Chan emphasises. “It’d be rude to not let you in on the fun.” 

You definitely weren’t hearing things, and this wasn’t a dream. 

At first, you can’t understand why you’re even considering their request, but there is one piece of information that sprung to mind and that’s your sex life. It hasn’t been entirely sex-filled as you’d like it to be, not to mention your slight lack of experience with threesomes wasn’t vast - but it also wasn’t limited either, especially after that encounter you once had with two of their friends Changbin and Hyunjin on a separate occasion. Although, they didn’t need to know that at all. 

That being said, this takes the cake. You can’t even comprehend what Chan or Felix are like in bed but, the opportunity seemed too ridiculously hot to pass up. 

“You...you want me to-“

“Like Channie said, if you want,” Lix assures you, interrupting your babbling. 

You aren’t somewhat surprised that Felix would ever want a threesome. He’s had sexual partners here and there in the past, multiple ones at a time. However, Chan never struck you as the type to have sex with more than one person. Even after a year of living with him and getting to know him, he’s still pretty private and exclusive. 

With the matter at hand and the more you think about the prospect in front of you, you aren’t opposed to the idea. So with your brain taking full control of your body, you hesitantly step over the discarded groceries lying on the ground. This is happening. Felix picks up on the right cue and extends his hand out to you as you take it gently. 

He guides you over to the edge of the bed where Chan is still sitting, but as you’re led over, he rises to his feet. There were a few seconds where you’re a little bit bewildered by what’s going on, but when you look into Chan’s dark eyes and as he takes your free hand, you become more centred.

Before you know it, he leans down to kiss you and kisses you good. You’ve never felt anything like it and as Felix releases your hand and sneaks behind your body, your mind starts turning into jelly. He gently swipes your hair to the other side of your shoulder while his other hand freely roams around your waist, underneath your shirt to feel the heat of your skin. His mouth places chaste kisses from your shoulder up to your neck. 

It feels so heavenly to be sandwiched between them; Felix kissing, biting softly over your skin while Chan continues to explore your mouth. It was impossible to think that just a few minutes ago, you were at the grocery store and now a complete world shift just seems to be occurring within that time frame. 

Chan breaks away from you for a second, kissing you tenderly one last time before sitting back down on the bed and moving up to the headboard. God this is really happening. You’re too deep in it now to not follow him like a lost, yet obedient puppy. You can see that he’s hard and want to touch him so badly but-

“Sit between me and face towards Felix,” he instructs before you can even reach for him. 

Your cheeks burn. While you have no idea what’s entirely in store, your body is getting excited and very obviously, so is Felix. He crawls over to you once you’re snug in between Chan’s legs before he tugs your shirt up from the hem and tosses it aside. Then, he finds your lips and kisses you until you have to silently beg and chase him for it.

Squirming in place, you feel hot and subjugated by Chan sitting behind you - snaking and trailing his hands around your now half-bare body, and Felix in front of him, who’s now gone on to give his supposed man some attention too.

He’s up on his knees with his body so close to you that you can feel the heat from him. Chan tilts his head up from resting on your shoulder and lets Felix take what he wants. The slick wet sounds of them both kissing along with the tiny moans you can feel in your ear, makes you shiver all over. You’re only still comprehending this all, that this is still actually happening. 

“So needy,” Chan says as he breaks away from him, inches away from his face when Felix hears and feels you unbuckling his belt. He straightens back up and consumes how flustered you are, observing the way you blink up at him pleadingly, displaying how badly you want it now. 

Felix smirks, gently grabbing your face with one hand and lowering down just enough to kiss you senseless again. But he cannot stray away from his other plans so frees himself from your lips to help slide your pants off down and discards them to the side. 

Immediately, you can see where this is going. 

“Aw, look how bad you want it,” Felix comments, swiping his thumb over the damp spot of your underwear with enough pressure for you to muffle a whine by biting down on your lip. You do want it bad and already seem to be losing a fight to the pleasure Felix is barely giving you. 

“Don’t tease her too much,” Chan cautions. 

Felix doesn’t seem to hear the warning for him as he helps you shimmy your underwear down. From there, Chan takes over. He hooks both of his legs over yours and separates them to not just expose you for Felix but to hold you down for what’s about to unfold. 

Heat accelerates through your cheeks as you feel embarrassed. At this point, your brain hasn’t caught up with the fact that you never show this much skin, let alone any skin in front of either of them. But that was going to be an afterthought for you when Felix distracts your mind by gently prying your legs open from your bent knees.

Pathetic whimpers slip past your lips as Felix lies down on his stomach, his face inches away from your pussy while he pets and glides his two fingers in between your folds. 

Your head shoots back onto Chan’s shoulder, very narrowly missing his face, “f-fuck…oh my god.”

Without warning, you feel the tip of Felix’s tongue lap a few times over your clit. If it weren’t for Chan acting as a human restraint to hold you down, there would’ve been a solid chance of you lurching forward. His arms are still wrapped around your abdomen, preventing you from moving forward so that you can take what Felix is giving you. 

It’s cruel, but Chan thinks it’s necessary for you to feel everything. Which you do when your hands grip each of Chan’s thighs, nearly squashing him backwards between you and the wall. 

“How does it feel?” he asks you. 

“F-Felix, mmm-” you breathe out his name, unable to answer properly and feel some vibrations from Chan’s chest to suggest that he was chuckling. Mainly at the fact that you weren’t able to directly answer his question. 

But it’s not long until the room quickly fills with your whimpers and moans mingled with the beautiful wet sounds as Felix keeps eating out your pussy. Tingly sensations spread like wildfire throughout every cell in your body from his mouth. It’s gradually becoming impracticable to keep up with his tongue. Not that you’ve ever imagined it before, but he does give good oral, good enough to put your breathing pace out of whack when he sucks on your clit. 

He’s not afraid of enjoying himself either. You can hear and feel his moans reverberate throughout your lower half. It even adds to the sensation of bliss that’s forming a knot in the pit of your stomach. So even though you don’t know, this is as good for Felix as it is for you. To him, it’s like going to heaven. 

What you also didn’t seem to know was when Chan unclasped your bra from behind your back and placed it to the side. His hands went from just holding you to now groping and playing with your tits as your body continued to melt into Felix’s mouth. 

“You’re loud aren’t you?” Chan whispers in your ear, rolling both of your nipples in between his thumbs and fingers to make you mewl and squirm. The different methods of pleasure send interesting messages to your brain that only make that crest of ecstasy build higher. 

You can only mewl until coherent words appear in his brain and out through his mouth, “s-sorry.”

Felix’s head game is so ridiculously mind-blowing that it makes you forget what language you speak.

Chan chuckles, purring into your ear, “don’t be sorry. You just can’t help it can you?” 

His hand circles up to your jaw, tilting it towards his face. He confirms in his mind how much of a mess you are. Cheeks stained pink with a fucked up expression that reads ‘I need more’, to which Chan reaches down and kisses you, sloppy and lazy. 

The velvety feel of your mouth when you open up more is slick with warmth. It’s starting to become more obvious how close you are when you start moaning repeatedly into Chan’s mouth. 

“I’m going to fuck you after this,” he breaks away, just inches from his lips again. 

You never would’ve guessed that Chan was even capable of forming such a dirty sentence. Then again, you never would’ve guessed that you would ever be in the position that you’re in now - having a threesome with your two housemates. 

“I’m…you’re gonna make me cum,” you sob, turning your head towards Chan on his shoulder, almost as if you were trying to escape the expansion of euphoria. He couldn’t help but kiss your forehead, waiting for you to brace for that wave. 

“Yeah?” Chan rouses. “Want to cum for us baby girl?”

You nod, too helpless to form an answer when you’re on the cusp of a forceful orgasm. He underestimated the strength he needed to hold you down, especially when you’re about to cum. So just when he needed to add more force, your body stiffens. Your legs so desperately crave to clamp around Felix’s head to help triage the pleasure, but it’s no use when Chan has you completely locked in. 

Your eyelids flutter, head pressing back further into Chan’s shoulder, “yes! I’m cumming!” 

With ragged, heavy breathing, the all-consuming pleasure takes you by the throat as the pleasure surges without control. Even though you’re being held down, it doesn’t stop your body from quivering. It lasts for what feels like an entire minute – one of the best orgasms you think you’ve ever experienced. 

Felix’s tongue slows down to a snail's pace, licking a few final stripes before kissing his way up your body, from your clit, abdomen, and then up to the base of your throat. His chin glistens as he adorns a smug smile. 

“Fuck…” you sigh out defeatedly, the aftermath of experiencing a volume of pleasure was starting to take its toll. “Oh my god.”

Chan kisses the side of your head, “sound so beautiful when you cum. Lix, switch with me so I can fuck her, yeah?”

“Wait-“ you pause, trying to reorient yourself as you hold onto Chan’s forearm for support. “I wanna ride you.” 

Felix looks down at you, “you sure angel? Channie isn’t exactly small.” 

From that statement alone, it was obvious to you that Felix was speaking from experience, a strong indication that they had in fact mucked around at least once in the past if not multiple times. But it didn’t matter if Chan or Felix for that matter was packing twelve inches, you needed to have something inside you to tame that need of feeling full. 

“I want to ride you-“ you nod to Chan – “but I want you to fuck me at the same time-“ you indicate towards Felix.

Neither of them expected you to be into that. Then again, they didn’t necessarily expect you to join them in bed either so anything was a surprise to them at this point. Chan and Felix can’t deny how insanely hot it is to hear you not only ask for them to do something but specifically ask you to do that. 

“Are you sure baby?” Chan has to ask you for assurance. 

“I can…I can take both of you.”  

Still stunned at your answer, Felix ushers to Chan, “you heard her.” 

He cannot lie and say that he’s not excited, because he is – they both are. So while Felix goes into the bedside table for a condom and lube, you move yourself off of Chan, turn around and start unbuckling his belt and helping him take his jeans off, almost like you’re in a rush. The imprint of his hard dick is enough to make your mouth water, and as Felix said, Chan definitely isn’t small. 

“Easy, I’m not going anywhere,” he chuckles, reorienting himself on the bed so that his head is on the pillow.  

Felix returns with the items he needs to help prep you, taking it as a sign to straddle over Chan’s legs and slowly tug his black boxers down. His cock springs onto his abdomen, the dark pink tip reaching just under his belly button. He had to be at least eight inches. Maybe just under, just.

“Ready angel?” Felix asks, kneeling behind you as you straddle Chan. The position would allow you to not only ride Chan but to take Felix from behind too, a dream so delicious that you can’t help but wonder how it was still all possible. 

“Yes,” you mutter. 

“Okay then,” he replies. 

Chan then holds the base of his cock steady for you, watching you slowly take those eight inches. The tip of his dick gently slots into your pussy, taking your time with sinking down. The warm heat engulfs his length, already sending shockwaves throughout his lower half. 

“That’s it, baby,” Chan says encouragingly, his fingertips delicately massaging over the skin of your things. “Good girl.”

You bite down on your bottom lip at the extraordinary stretch. In the meantime, Felix squirts a dollop of the lube onto his fingers to warm it up a bit before applying it to your hole.

He thumbs over it, sending shivers up your spine. It’s vital to him to make sure that you’re prepped well for him to fuck your ass. So he starts small by slowly inserting the tip of his finger, before gradually using slow yet long strokes, enough to make your head loll back. 

Felix has to express in awe when he sees the result of your efforts to fully envelope Chan’s length, “look at that. You took all of him, angel.” 

You know very well that you have because you can feel him in places that other men in your past haven’t reached. The stretch still sings a bit but it could easily be confused with the gorgeous satisfaction of Chan filling you right out. 

“So…big,” you strain out, scratching your nails down Chan’s abdomen, almost like a cat, just not as painful. 

Meanwhile, as Felix has slowly been stretching your hole out with his fingers, he uses his teeth and his free hand to peel the foil back of the condom packet. He had already freed himself from his jeans when he went to reach for the lube beside the bed so was hard and ready to roll the condom down his cock.   

“M’ready Lix,” you say to him, unable to see the smile you brought to his face from how eager you are. 

“I know baby, just one second,” he replies before aligning his cock with your hole. 

Very carefully and slowly, he starts pushing his tip in. Your eyes flutter shut, steadying your breathing in the process in preparation to take all of him as well. Chan rubs up and down your arm, distracting you from the temporary sting. With the lube doing its job, Felix can continue to push in at a leisurely pace right until he has the majority of his cock wrapped up by you. 

“Doing so well Y/N,” Chan says reassuringly. “Just stay like this for a bit until you’re ready to move yeah?” 

You nod, allowing your body and muscles to relax and ease into the pleasure that’s starting to fade out the burn. It’s difficult to comprehend a fuller feeling than this; to have two cocks stuffed in you to the hilt, and after a few moments of getting used to it, you slowly start to move. 

“Mmm, yes fuck,” you sigh with satisfaction, using your hands on Chan’s abdomen to steady your body as you being to move your hips. “You both…feel so fucking good inside me.”

Your words were difficult for Felix to not listen to who was trying to ward off from thrusting for a little bit until you were comfortable with him starting to fuck you. It wasn’t until your movements became a bit quicker that he began to catch up to your pace. Very quickly did the room turn into a space brimming with moans, wet sounds, and the sound of skin slapping. It was plenty to add to the intense sensation you were hurtling towards.  

Chan’s eyes are fixated on watching your pussy swallow his cock with every long stroke you take on him, “oh my god.”

With his tank top still on, Chan lifts it by the hem and holds onto it with his teeth. It wasn’t just to make sure that your hands weren’t going to be slipping on him as you use his abdomen to support yourself when you rock down, but it was also to restrict a whole bunch of moans that were about to rip through his chest. But even that couldn’t put a lid on the groans and growls rumbling from him. 

“Taking us both so well angel,” Felix says exasperatedly in your ear. 

His deep yet velvety voice has you leaning back slightly so that half of your back is pressed against his chest. With the help of you turning your head towards his face, Felix’s mouth crashes onto yours, almost tasting the remnants of yourself from before. He kisses you passionately, moaning into your mouth like he’s going to die if he doesn’t. 

“Fucking perfect,” he growls, diverging from your mouth to dive into your neck to suck a few hickies in and groping your tits from behind. “Can’t get enough of you dammit.” 

You sob out as he pinches your nipples, but also when Chan reaches down to your pussy, finds your clit and begins to rub in perfect motions, “god – fuck, I can’t…s’too much!” 

Their cocks hit spots so phenomenally that each time they stroke over them, your holes involuntarily clench around them. Not to mention the total stimulation they were feeding you. 

Felix’s hips haven’t faltered since they started pumping forward into your ass. The upward curvature of his cock seemed to be scratching the part of your brain that is responsible for making your eyes roll back. Chan’s dick on the other hand had you shaking. The length and girth were sickeningly satisfying. 

“Not gonna last,” you whine, still keeping up the same pace when you rock down on Chan and feel Felix continue to thrust in and out. “So close…” 

The hem of Chan’s shirt is long gone from his mouth, already given up on trying to suppress whatever was going to come out, “gonna cum for us again, huh? Such a good girl, taking us both at the same time.” 

Chan couldn’t lie either, but he was close a long time ago, probably the second you decided that you wanted to ride him. Felix happened to be on the same page. He couldn’t get over this entire situation, finding it so fucking hot that even just a dream of it would be a blessing. 

Words start to slip away from your brain once more. Aside from your orgasm swimming towards an astronomical high, you try to cling to that amazing feeling before it eventually disappears. But all good things come to an end. Your nails dig into Chan’s thighs while Felix has one arm barred just under your chest as the other hand doesn’t let up on your nipple. It throws your pace off balance and staggers your breathing when you start reaching that very pinnacle of euphoria. 

“Yes! Fuck, I’m cumming!” You scream out. 

Your thighs clamp around the frame of Chan’s lower half, shaking and shivering in place as the pleasure reaches its apex. Felix didn’t let up on his pace, fucking you all through your orgasm as Chan replaces your motions by fucking upwards and into you. Both of your holes spasm and contract around their dicks, enough to actually make them cum by the time you’ve reached the height of your orgasm. 

“I’m gonna cum, holy fuck, s’too good,” Felix’s head rests on your back, watching his cock disappear in and out of you before he starts to bust inside of the condom. His fingernails brutally dig into your hips when he cums. 

Your moans easily fill up the room once more now that you have no choice but to succumb to the euphoria when your orgasm hits its hardest. Chan’s head tips back further into the pillow, eyes screwed tight shut as he’s hit with a tsunami of pleasure. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” he exclaims loudly, his chest heaving up and down as he spills inside of you. He’s lucky that he did because as the pleasure reached a point where it was too much for you to bear, you slowly lean forward towards Chan, their cocks sliding out of you in the process. 

On each exhale your body shudders, like the surges of aftershocks while the pleasure slowly plateaus. From this angle, Felix can still see you contracting, watching Chan’s cum leak from your pussy. If he wasn’t so fucked out, he would’ve had the energy to eat you out again. 

In saying that, he is the first to recover and come to his senses a bit faster than either you or Chan. He takes the condom off, ties it, and discards it in the rubbish bin in the corner of the room before putting his boxers back on. Meanwhile, you’re still panting trying to catch your breath, resting on top of Chan’s body, you feel his hand run soothingly up and down your spine. 

“Such a good girl for us,” he says caringly. “Felt so good.”

Felix sits beside you both at the top of the bed. He cards a gentle hand through your hair, observing your distant expression, “you there baby?” 

You blink up at him and nod, your brain still trying to process that sort of orgasm. 

“When you’re ready, we’ll get you cleaned up yeah?” He smiles softly down at you. 

As the minutes ticked by, Felix lent you a helping hand to stand up when you were ready. Even though you were wobbly on your feet, he still guided you to the bathroom and ran a nice hot shower. Both Felix and Chan joined you in a bid to make sure you knew that they were there, dousing you with as much praise as an individual could get – and they meant every word. 

When you were ready to hop out, Chan fetched you one of his warm jerseys and placed it straight over your body before telling you to hop in his bed while he went to gather up the towels and clothes from the bathroom. Just as he was picking up the last items, Felix caught him right as he was about to walk out. 

“She okay?” Chan asks him. 

Felix nods reassuringly, “out like a light.”

“Alright then,” he sighs contently. “She’ll probably be asleep for the rest of the day.”

“Mm,” he hums, staring at a space just to the side of Chan who picks up on the subtle behaviour. 

“Is there something wrong?” Chan asks as a slight concern balloons in his chest. 

“When are you going to tell her?” Felix asks. 

Chan stares at him, trying to figure out what he means, “tell her what?” 

He rolls his eyes and chuckles, “that you like her, idiot. That we like her.” 

That had been a distant thought for Chan for some time. The possibility of that ever working out between the three of you seemed like a long shot. You only all slept together. There was no depth to it other than that even though deep down, Chan would’ve liked it to be for the sole purpose that he likes you. But it’s not just him.

It’s also the one standing at the doorframe, staring right back at Chan; Felix. 

[clairewritesjjkxreader]

Sukuna’s Wife and Yuuji’s Onee-chan (Sukuna x Reincarnated!Y/N) scenario: Heian era childhood

Request by @serendipitylovescat

A/N: This is a possible origin story for Sukuna and Y/N in this onee-chan au, but I haven’t made up my mind as to how the two met and what their lives were like in the early days. Much like with the Joker’s multiple choice past, it’s the mystery that keeps on giving. Anyway, HAPPY NEW YEAR, EVERYONE.

Trigger warning: child abuse, bullying, violence, swearing

Ryomen Sukuna. Two-faced Sukuna. Bastard. Murderer. Halfling. Demon.

Normally, parents give extra thought when naming their children. For a lot of boys, they’re usually named based on desired traits like “strong” or “powerful.” But for this son, his father snidely called him “two-faced” and the name stuck. 

Like every baby when they are born, Sukuna arrived in this world covered in blood and weeping. The other villagers could only think of the worst outcome for his mother. After all, so many young wives who were healthier than she died during labor, so it was only normal to expect the stick-thin woman to pass on. 

But for better or worse, she survived. 

A smooth delivery would normally be a thing of celebration, a living mother and her plump baby were supposed to be a blessing. For Sukuna’s parents, such a thing was a curse. 

Born with four arms and four eyes and suspiciously symmetrical birthmarks, such an abomination could only be a curse. 

His father suspected his wife of seducing a yōkai, he became a drunk and beat his wife daily, unwilling to even look at the thing that she claimed to be his own son. The other villagers believed that he ate his twin inside their mother and was punished by the gods. 

No one knew the truth, not even the child himself. 

One thing they could all agree on was this: Sukuna was a monster. 

He was a monster who pushed his father into doing bad things. He was a monster who caused his mother shame and suffering, as she loved to remind him every single day.

Sukuna leaned on the tree, watching as the other kids in their little village played tag. His stomach growled but he could only ignore it. If he returned home to eat, his mother would yell at him. He only ate when she was asleep or beaten into unconsciousness by his father.

“Found you.” 

Sukuna looked up and beamed. That’s right, everyone except one person hated him.

Unlike him, you were normal as far as his eyes could see, but you didn’t like staying in your house and you didn’t talk about your family. Neither of you liked anything or anyone in this village, only each other. 

“Onigiri with fatty tuna I caught this morning,” you said, sitting next to him. 

Sukuna voraciously bit into the rice and fish, savoring every moment with gratitude. “You’re the best cook I know.”

“Tell me if you want some tea. I managed to sneak some out.”

“Thanks–” his grin faded when he spotted familiar black and blue spots on your inner arm. They were the same bruises his mother had when she tried to block her husband’s hands.

“Who did this?” He asked, his three free hands grabbing your wrist.

“Ryo-chan,” you said his nickname–you were the only one who was never afraid of saying his name–“you’re hurting me.”

“S-sorry.” He pulled away two hands and softened the grip on the remaining one. He gently rotated your arm to get a better look. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.” You grinned. “I know you didn’t mean to.”

“Did you—”

“Hey, Ryo-chan…” You shook off his grasp, causing him to frown, but you quickly intertwined your fingers together, making him blush. “If I told you I plan to run away, will you come with me?”

He almost dropped the onigiri. 

Your smile became sad. “I… You’re the only one I will ever miss. I don’t like this place.”

He put his remaining hands over your connected fingers and he blurted out, “Yes!”

You blinked, wide-eyed.

He cleared his throat and looked away. “I-I mean, yes, let’s go.”

Your face brightened and he smiled back. 

That’s right. Even if this damned village burned to the ground, as long as your hand never let go of his then nothing else mattered.

Additional headcanons for this scenario:

Sukuna’s dad never hit him because deep inside the man was actually afraid. So he took out his frustrations on his wife, who in turn, blames her misfortune on her son. 

Speaking of Sukuna’s mother, she was a vain beauty, the most gorgeous in their village during her prime, and was distraught when her appearance faded due to malnutrition during her pregnancy. The entire time, she silently prayed that the baby would die early so she could recover quickly. So in addition to her husband’s mistreatment of her, the loss of her looks has made her resent her son. 

The other village kids didn’t like Sukuna because he gave off a “disgusting energy” (or “bad vibes” as today’s lingo would call it). Some avoided him but others went out of their way to gang up on him, beating him up and stealing whatever he carried, be it food or toys from you.  

Sukuna didn’t fight back because he truly believed that he deserved every bad thing that happened to him. That being said, he allowed himself one selfish choice and accepted your company, enjoying your friendship. The only warmth in his otherwise dead existence.

The first time Sukuna resorted to violence was…it was a few days after your proposal. It was a few minutes before day break and he caught the other kids holding your head down a nearby pond. He didn’t know what he did, only what happened after: you were crying into his chest, hugging and thanking him despite the blood all over him. 

After washing himself, he walked you home, hair and clothes still wet from the pond, your mother was the first person to see you. Instead of concern or worry, she slapped you across the face in front of everyone before dragging you away by the hair.

Because it was your mother, he could only watch on, until your eyes met and you whimpered his name.

That night, a little village with no more than fifty people, burned to the ground as two children watched hand in hand. 

A/N: Speaking of multiple choice past; in JJK (and sadly, even in real life parts of the world), twins are considered bad luck. What if Sukuna didn’t consume his twin in utero and they both survived? What if both fell for Y/N? What if the current Sukuna killed and ate his own brother because he wanted to, in his own sick way, combine himself and his twin into one being so that Y/N wouldn’t have to choose?? Hot damn. The perfect yandere love triangle. But what a pain that would be to write without illustration LOLOLOL.

@shadowywizardarcade @hannya-exists @nineooooo @lilachaeyo @pumpkindudeishere @jessbeinme15 @fluffy-koalala @cringeycookies @frogzxch @isimpfordanielpark @marvelsgirl4ever @sanzusmom @sheccidoscar @alastorhazbin @satosuguswife @lumanii @leahlovesreading @blackstaw @boba–12

[desperatepleasures]

rereading the maidmer story to get into the Conrart Zone but since it's aro visibility day im also gonna drop some aro shit he says

[tunapotatobangchan]

WHEN MY TUNA SALAD AND POTATOES ARE ROTTEN

[wren-dy-flowergarden]

𝒄𝒊𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒍𝒍𝒂 𝒊𝒔 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒂 𝒇𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒚𝒕𝒂𝒍𝒆

*ੈ✩‧˚₊⁀➴For a whole world defined by the idea of fairytales, you did not feel as if you were living one. But Cinderella got her Prince Charming eventually! Maybe you end up with your own fairytale ending once you finish your hellish shift. 

*ੈ✩‧˚₊⁀➴ A/N: Sorry! A repost that only 12 people have saw before (the special ones) and I thought more ppl need to see my boi Floyd. Thank you for filling my insecurity  (ノ*°▽°*).✧.*✦ *.✧  

*ੈ✩‧˚₊⁀➴ Word Count: 4.3k   Floyd x gn!reader

*ੈ✩‧˚₊⁀➴ Tags: friends who want more, long shifts = loss of logic, fluff and deals, a little spicy at the end? hands, Hands, HANDS! 

For a whole world defined by the ideas of fairytales, you did not feel as if you were living in one.

Life has been "hectic" to put it mildly. From being pushed into a carriage (which should be considered kidnapping logic blasted away between gaps in worlds), dealing with egotistical boys that turn into a monster of repressed issues, and on top of all that studying 24/7 to even catch up with the grade level is too much to handle.

Oh, and to keep up with Grim's insatiable appetite, meaning he ordered twenty plates of tuna behind her back at Lounge Monstro leading to said terror to complain that his "poor paws" can't soak or they become little wet stubs. Not only that the animal language test was coming up and you really needed all the help you could get. Therefore, you took up some extra shifts that were available at the Lounge.

The only shift being dishwater duty.

Plummeting her hands with washed-up food and soapy water felt disgusting.

It felt like a pre-prince charming Cinderella fairytale.

Scratch that, you felt like a poorer pre-prince charming Cinderella. At least Cinderella got a fire to sleep next to (though Grim acted as a nice heater if he didn't twist and turn so much at night.)

Dousing wrinkled fingers, with clean water from the spout you gave an audible groan as the busser just pushed at least twenty more dirty dishes to her. He gave a small sorry before dashing off again.

You eyed the mess of gravy, picked clean bones, and a mountain of stacked soda glasses about to tip over. A job is a job but this is ridiculous.

Starting with the plates first you grumbled, "Stupid Azul being cheap-" scrubbing harder against a stain, "scheduling only one dishwasher today." All of a sudden, oxygen left your lungs as something heavy collided into you.

"Koebi-chan! You're here today~" Floyd grinned as he put most of his weight onto your body.

Being "hugged" by Floyd felt more like being "mauled" by a bear. A strange, friendly, sharp tooth instead of nails type of bear but mauled either way.

"You're heavy", you grumble hunching over, chest almost touching the tip of the basin, "get off me!"

You are not supposed to poke the bear but in this case Floyd really didn't mind, "Hehe~. Koebi-chan is super fun when they’re red!"

Like his twin would say, 'There is no stopping Floyd from getting what he wants without measurable danger.'. The danger might be your neck being squeezed or maybe losing a finger to pointy teeth but really what could be worse than your kidnapping from another world situation? Not much.

Yuu steadies her hands against the sink as eyes glaring at yellow, “At least help me with dishes. With you, on cooking duty instead of Jade there are at least triple the number of pans."

He leans back relieving some of the weight as he explains with clear disinterest, "Ehhhh, but I just got off!"

He snakes one arm around your waist pulling tight as you let out a squeak, his lips getting closer before he breathes out.

"Let's just stay here~" You feel his lips close to your ear, “Forever~”

You flayed, pruned hands covering your ears as a crimson red ran up your cheeks as you broke out of Floyd's grip gaping at him.

"You- You!"

Floyd breaks out into his signature grin, mirth dancing in his eyes, "Hehe. Koebi-chan gives the best reactions ever!

You glared back before turning to at least an hour’s worth of dishes that need to be done before Azul sent you home tonight. Then it was the homework and also finding the time to make a quick dinner, and ugh- "Just help me out would you? My feet are already hurting from tonight's dinner rush."

"Nahhh." Floyd says stretching his arms above his head a few pops and a shrug later he crosses his arms with the smirk of someone who would get at least 8 hours of sleep tonight, "Azul said I'm done tonight."

Well duh, you heard all the wrong orders going out. Azul probably wanted to preserve if/any profits were made tonight.

"Besides! Washing dishes are supeeeer boring." he tilts his head to the side frowning, "Not really into that."

You sighs and tries to outweigh the odds in her head:

Option one: Floyd will go bother some other poor soul after a few moments of silence.

Or

Option two: If he did try to clean the dishes Yuu is almost 99.9999% sure that the show-off would try to recreate his basketball moves using plates as the ball which would eventually break and YOU would have to clean up.

Or get your pay docked . . .

Option one it is.

"Fine Floyd. I'll see you tomorrow then."

A slow blink before the six-foot man unrolled his arms, confusion in his voice, "Huh?"

You focused on scrubbing at a black stain on one of the pots, it's a 50/50 if it looks clean or not, "I said 'fine'. I will see you tomorrow." You would not turn back around. You are focused. Focused on these hellish stains.

So focused, you did not even notice Floyd stomp off.







An hour and a half later, wrinkled chicken skin and tender feet that hurt to walk on you were finally given the ok to head home.

It was worth it though, you gasped when Azul gave a copy of his notes. Diagrams, arrows, and color-coded entries determine which grammar was being used. If Azul wasn't such a devil when it came to business he might have been an angel.

Stuffing the notes into her book bag, she winced glancing at her feet and feeling her skin rubbed raw.

Note to self: wear better socks.

Shuffling slowly to the entrance two figures shadowed the bar, Jade polishing a glass and Floyd's with his head down on the counter.

Jade gave a perfected smile, "Ah Prefect, thank you for working so hard today," his eyes glanced down to his brother sulking on the counter, "Floyd told me you were very focused today."

A whine came from Floyd, like his puppy (do merpeople have puppies?) just got kicked. Yuu shuffled around to a bar stool leaning against it, "Well I was trying to get home before ten, but it seems like that wasn't the case tonight."

Floyd kicked his feet against the bar counter another whine leaving him.

Jade blinked, expression turning inquisitive to a not-very well-hidden smirk, "Pardon my manners, but Prefect you seem rather stressed. Isn't that right Floyd?"

Floyd let out a sound that Yuu could not tell if it was an agreement or not, but Jade knew as he placed a perfectly polished flute on the counter.

He smiles, and it sends a small shiver down your spine, "It seems you're unsteady on your feet Prefect, your shoes giving you difficulty?"

He tilts his head to his twin, grin not leaving his face, "It may come as a surprise, but Floyd may be able to help your situation."

Floyd stops kicking the bar and you are trying to make heads or tails of Jade's words. It was late. You were tired. You wanted to go home to whatever rickshaw/graveyard dorm you called a home when other dorms had where place in literally different geo spheres.  

You shake your head, "No thanks, I rather deal with my bloody toes another day."

It was as if Jade expected that answer because he just nods, in full understanding, and Jade never fully understood unless it was for his gain you've learned, "It's unfortunate, but I believe this be for better than for not. Remember our favor?"

And no, you don't remember, because there could be a billion favors you owe Jade- from him giving tips to you to keep up with rush hour or simply holding the door open for you- because every act of kindness from him is a disguise for his amusement.

You stare at Floyd, who was oddly quiet at this moment, and you want to collapse but it was better not to ask about favors in front of them both.

They tend to get a little jealous and the rest of your day is gone trying to make one of the two contents until they forget. That person usually being Floyd, because Jade rarely forgets.

You groan, placing a hand on your head to stop your incoming headache.

Fine. What's the worst that can happen?

You probably couldn't imagine what the "worst" was through the pounding in your head as Floyd jumps up, joy evident on his face as he pulls you with him with Jade waving goodbye.

The "worst" was actually being carried chest to chest spinning around in circles through Octavinelle's public lounge which thank god there were nobody in sight, or should you say blurred with the way Floyd keeps twisting you around and around like a whirlpool.

You complain once about Floyd's freakishly long legs walking too fast and this is what you get.

The only way to balance yourself was ducking into his neck shutting your eyes waiting for the experience to be better. You dig in close and Floyd in response is to squeezes you closer.

…It’s not that uncomfortable.

"We're here!" Floyd shouts and you immediately put a hand over his mouth, you don't want to wake anyone else up to this embarrassing scene, for your own sake.

Floyd lowers you to the floor where you gently let go of his neck, your distress evident enough on your face because Floyd is grinning like a kid who just made bank at the candy store.

The door opens one side to messy clothes littered over every droppable surface there is sheets twisted to one corner of the bed, and papers scattered across his desk. In all honesty, it would not be that bad if not for the fact the other side looked like those real state showrooms. Nothing was out of place, no crease on the bedding, and everything was ironed and hanging on a clothing rack not very far from an organized desk. Must be Jade’s side.

Floyd pushes you a bit and you stumble toward his side of the room.

"Hey! I can still walk you know." Dodging some thrown clothes was more difficult as Floyd closes the door.

"Ehhh, but you were just staring Koebi-chan." He gets closer knocking you onto the edge of his bed. Huh. Your heart feels like it's running at a thousand miles per hour as Floyd puts two hands on your shoulders pressing you into the bed so that your sitting, "Relax, relax~ we're just getting started!"

Wha- What does he mean by that!?

His fingers glide gently down your arms, and it feels like fire touching ice for the first time. A strong goosebump sensation travels down leaving just a strange warm feeling filling up your body. It's weird and you don't know how to handle this as he keeps trails down to your hands before gripping them.

You never noticed how much he engulfed you as he gave you a tight squeeze, before lowering onto his knees. He would be between your legs if you weren't squeezing your thighs as hard as possible together. Knocking on your kneecap like a door he gives childish smile, "Move your legs Koebi-chan~" It was to- to much for your poor little heart.

You call out, well it comes out more as a half shriek half whimper as you push at Floyd who was slowly pushing one of your legs aside, "Hey- that! That's too much!"

Floyd blinks, "Too much?" He leans downward, chin onto the edge of your thigh and frowns similar to how you imagine a dog being yelled at. You do everything in your power to stop your voice from shaking, but this was the furthest you have ever gone in your life, and you haven't even kissed!

You mind was quickly turning into a vortex sucking in every single scenario locked in the back of your head and just when you feel the tip of your ears about to burn off a whine interrupts you.

"But Koebi-chan, I just need my tools."

Forget the ears, your whole head was exploding off your shoulders, "T-to-tools!?"

Another nod, "Yup," a pop of the 'p', "ya know to fix your shoes." And your face must be ridiculous because Floyd gives such an uncontrollable laugh his head tilting back before wiping a stray tear from his eye. He grips your ankle loosening the collar between shoe and skin. You let out a small wince as the shoe peels apart from bloody skin, him delicately wriggling out the rest of the shoe off.

He flips the crew shoe upside down, "You see. Koebi-chan’s foot is getting all mashed up like shark food. See, see?" You kind of notice, only the tip of the show is scrubbed off along with a large part of the heel.

Floyd flips the shoe again as he shows you the inside, the heel is worn down to the sole and there is wet blood on the side as he clicks his tounge, "Koebi-chan~ You should've given Azul the right size, now you're payin' for it!" And you would if you could, but only men's sizes are available and that kind of screwed you over a bit for your small feet.

"So- so the tools you were talking about..."

He slides his arms underneath the bed pulling out a worn wooden box. A grin blossoms to life as he unclasps the top of the box revealing what you could only assume to be a cobbler set. Unlike everything else in his room, the tools are polished to a worn type of satisfaction- like an artisan who created each imperfection to conceive perfection.

It wasn't what you were thinking of at all.

It. Wasn't. That. At. All.

Floyd’s smile widens as he sees your puffed-up cheeks, meanwhile scrunching into yourself to hopefully create a black hole to swallow yourself in rather than face embarrassment of misreading the conversation.

"Woah- this is a new phase for Koebi-chan!"

"Just! Just fix my shoes Floyd!"







You look at the clock located on Jade's side of perfection. It read 11:43, and you were surprised that Jade hasn't come back yet, well scratch that, he is dedicated to his craft. You flip over on the bed as Floyd is still extending the collar of your crew shoes. It's a different look you don't see often. Mostly Floyd will be hopping around from area to area with either a smile or frown on his face, but now he just stared in concentration using his tools to create.

You never have seen him like this, and that bothered you- just a bit. You were so used to his voice filling every space of the conversation that all you needed to worry about were your next words. Now all you had were you, him, and your thoughts.

You hate to say this, but maybe it was because you were bored?

A small cough leaks through your mouth, just enough to garner attention and it doesn't even distract him. You frown and just when you are about to turn around to stare at the clock Floyd giggles, "Koebi-chan looks like they're drying up on hot sand."

Rolling your eyes you respond, "Well I am just laying here." Floyd must be amused because you can hear him hum a little tune under his breath as he grabs a canister from the box and a small brush.

"Hey, Floyd."

"Hmmmm~ Whatcha want?"

You think of the best way to ask these questions, but you assume the simpler the better.

"Why do you know how to fix shoes?"

"Hmmmmmm dunno."

"You don't know?" You take another glance at how meticulously he handles every instrument like he carved each one from hand for its own individual purpose. You decide to rephrase, "Is it another hobby?"

Brushing another coat of the mixture onto the tip he cracks his neck turning his lamp to the side, "When I was little, Jade and I sometimes see land-dwellers on land twirling and dancing around.” He tips his brush back into the mixture, “We don’t need feet because it’s not needed ya know. Yet you guys decorate your feet in so many styles its super interesting you know. Just cause we have fins doesn’t mean we paint them weird colors. Suuuper funny you know.”

He clicked his feet together and it was just then you noticed the difference of the style of Floyd's shoes compared to your own brown ones. They were in pristine condition, as the white cut the heel and toe into two parts separating them from matte to a glossier finish with no marks on them. It was much different than the beaten-up ones he currently had between his fingertips.

You never really looked down when talking to Floyd because he was so much taller.  You guess you never did notice how pristine his shoes were compared to how frumpy he wore his uniform.

"Heh, seeing how land-dwellers had so many styles for their feet is so funny." He looks at your feet, already bandaged up with some disinfectant, "It's like you have to wear 'em. You landies are so delicate that you need shoes to protect your feet! That's sooooo different~"

You're starting to understand, "And that just makes us all the more interesting huh?"

He grins in a way you can see a sharp tooth poking out on top, "But your wayyyy more interesting than the others Koebi-chan~ .”

Your cheeks start to warm up, but you don’t fall for the bait, “Oh really?”

"M'mhm almost done~"

You roll to a cooler side of the bed, "And I was just getting comfy here." It really was miles above your own cardboard spring bed, you were sinking into this bed than just laying on a rock with some sheets thrown ontop.

Floyd swivels around on his chair and just wheezes as he looks at your form, "HA- Koebi-chan looks like a starfish now!" And you can’t disagree this is one of the comfiest beds you have been on yet it was all disturbed with Floyd gripping your ankles pulling you slowly to the edge of the bed.

“Wake uppp, you have to try em on now.” He whines as you groggle. Sitting on the edge of the bed again, you have purer thoughts this time as Floyd gets down own knee. He folds up your pant leg a couple rolls to expose your ankles better.

Satisfied, he cautiously takes one of the shoes and opens the collar gently guiding your toes in making sure not to catch any of the band aids on the side. You look down at him and again he is so focused, it’s so unlike him yet it doesn’t look that unfamiliar.

Catching the heel in place you are in awe. Instead of the front frow of your toes being squished there was now enough room to wiggle, and your heel wasn’t digging into the back of the shoe anymore. Not only that a new coat of paint was layered of scratches and on the rim of the sole you could see accents of white and grey cutting the style of the shoe leaving it with a trendy type of look.

You twist your foot back and forward looking at his craftsmanship. It’s amazing its spare detail that makes you feel like it’s yours. Something made for you. You and nobody else.

It almost felt like you were Cinderella fitting on the glass shoe.

“Soooo?” He whispers breaking you out of your thoughts, “Perfect fit?” He knows it because he is wearing a grin that reads as ‘say it! say how much you like it!’.

You roll your eyes, “Perfect fit Floyd.” He’s still looking at you with those puppy dog eyes. It’s a little outside your comfort zone but you raise a hand to his scalp and rub in circles, “I really like them.”

They really were perfect. So perfect a concern crosses your mind, “How much does it cost?”

Lazy eyes blink as you stop massaging his head, “Hmmmm?” He thinks for a moment, “Well I’m feelin’ pretty nice today Koebi-chan~” And automatically your brain thinks ‘free?’ but of course this is the dorm of deals akin to mercy so Floyd continues, “How about a kiss?”

…

A kiss…?

Your thought you were in the safe but your brain short circuits all the way to outer space and back, “A- A kiss!? What are you talking about Floyd. That’s- What!”

He pouts, “Well cause after you land-dwellers finish the last song usually you guys kiss right?” He sighs sitting on the floor crossing his legs, “Ya know I dance all the time, but I’ve never kissed anyone after.”

There are so many things wrong with that logic, but your short, circuited mind isn’t making sense, so you say something just as dumb back.

“We aren’t dancing Floyd.”

He looks at you in a way that makes you look like the dense one, “Duh Koebi-chan, that’s why this is the price!” He points to his cheek, “Right here! That’s where I want the kiss!”

Being flabbergasted is an understatement to how you feel right now, Floyd just keeps looking at you expectantly from the floor as he keeps tapping his cheek. It’s just a kiss on the cheek you say to yourself, what’s the worse that can happen? You’ve kissed your mom on the cheek this is fine!

“…fine.” Floyd lights up like its Christmas and you must wonder in the back of your mind if this is really just some elaborate scheme you are playing into. He is not getting up and you are embarrassed beyond the universe as you slide off the bed onto the floor, “Tilt- tilt your cheek to the side.”

He does so without hesitation, you can still see half the smile he is wearing on his face as you put an arm out to steady you as you lean closer and closer- oh please god don’t let my heart kill me- and right when your close enough to close your eyes and quickly press your lips against cool skin you hear a chuckle.

“Eh Koebi-chan face is really cute right now.” And suddenly you feel your chin being jerked as your lips contact something so much softer than what you remember as a child. It’s a little cool and somewhat chapped as you press into him and then he moves! You won’t open your eyes because if you do it feels like the butterflies beating in your chest will explode out of you. Floyd moves his hand to stable you as he rubs the other hand behind the back of your neck relaxing you into him as he moves against you in a way that it takes all your concentration to move with him.

A breath and you are gasping for air like a person held underneath water for far too long. Red face forehead to forehead to cool eyes and Floyd slowly licks his lips and looks at you in a way a hunter has just captured its prey. Devious eyes you think before he leans in again and you follow suit because there was something so addicting with the way Floyd pulls your lower lips with his fang and the way he rubs your arm back and forward as if wanting more of you and the only way you can answer is by gripping him tighter between your fingers.

You break apart and you lean against his chest this time catching your breath as he holds you, if you listened to his heart beat it was almost as fast as yours. You gulp air still passing through your lungs, “Was- Was that enough?” It was hard to hear his response through the blood passing through your ears, but Floyd just laughs as you feel his chest move with every breath, he hold your cheek as he tilts your head up craning it towards his dual-colored eyes.

He has a pretty, pink blush on him as well covering his nose all the way to his cheek bones, you can see the fang that tugs your lips barely peeking out of his smile.

“Hmmmm~ Maybe just one more.” And you close your eyes just one more time.





───────────✧.*✦ *.✧.*✦ *.✧.*✦ ───────────────

(Around 11:25pm at Lounge Monstro)

Azul is not having a good day. Not at all. Wasted food and damages, he needed to pay for restoring table 28, 32 and 18 after Floyd for some reason stormed out the kitchen and creating destruction everywhere he went. Azul groans as he flips through number filled papers with red lines and circles.

He thought that he had properly prepared to mitigate these damages when he gave Floyd an early night off but seeing his previous number quadrupled put him into a sour mood.

Reading the clock 11:28, he locks his office ready to get at least four hours of sleep because he still needed to write that business proposal for the headmaster-

“…Jade you’re still here?” He asks taking a step over what seems to be a sleeping bag and a couple books hovering near a campsite lamp, “We talked about this. No “practice” camping in the lounge” Azul warns as he finds Jade near a booth flipping through a book all about mushroom delights.

Jade just looks, with polite smile all he says is, “You can settle all qualms with Ramshackle’s prefect.” As he flips the next page.

Azul groans, Ramshackle’s prefect, another word for headache. Always putting their nose where it’s not supposed to be, but how would that be affecting Jade? Jade being a consistent vice warden understood Azul’s clear confusion and clarifies, “Floyd is with them in the dorm.”

oh….OH

Azul waved his thoughts away, there was no need to deal with this at this very moment instead he hands over the papers in his hand, “Help me with these accounts and you can stay in my room tonight.”

“Oh, how gracious of you.”

“Be quiet. Floyd is working double after tonight.”

[kinky-pen]

Do you have any headcanons of the hosts, both SFW and NSFW?

(2/2) ...Actually, when I mean “NSFW” Headcanons for the hosts, don’t include Honey, obviously. Have a couple of random thoughts on all the hosts. Not too much for the SFW, as I recently answered something similar, but a couple of NSFW headcanons for each of them below the cut.

SFW Headcanons

Tamaki

Finally realised he was pansexual in his final year of university, which really should've come sooner. Had a whole, elaborate coming out party, during which Kyoya just yelled inarticulately and stormed off. That's when Tamaki found out his best friend had been in love with him since middle school. (Depending on what you ship - I ship everything - that would be when Tamaki and Kyoya got together)

Haruhi

Finally gets fancy tuna in university. It wasn't the hosts who bought it for her, however, but a classmate who was incredibly thankful for the tutoring Haruhi gave them. Yes, the hosts were all incredibly upset (showing it in their own ways), and it was just a massive headache for Haruhi in general. They did admit it was stupid of them after about a week, though, and apologised.

Kyoya

Started med school in an effort to catch up to his brothers. The subsequent mental breakdown was not worth it, and he dropped out. Took the rest of the year as a gap year and then took the usual business and finance degrees when he got back from his travels. (The new septum piercing was discarded not long after he got back, however, after too many comments from the twins and Akito.

Kaoru

His fashion design degree nearly killed him. He was living on ramen (because it was convenient) and energy drinks for so long, just working on his projects day and night. The other ex-hosts had to host an intervention and make him sleep. He woke up after being dead to the world for nearly 20 hours, and everyone (except med student Kyoya) thinking he'd slipped into a coma.

Hikaru

Conversely to his brother, Hikaru spent a lot of time in university going to parties, especially those held by the chem majors (iykyk). Had a lot of fun, made a lot of friends, and dragged Kaoru with him by his hair more often than he probably should've. It was good stress relief for the both of them, though.

Mori

Very popular at university, in both senses of the word. While Mori's not the type for too many trysts and one night stands, it didn't mean he didn't have a lot of offers. Had a couple of girlfriends, and a few boyfriends, during this time.

Hani

Buckled down during university, in terms of studying, but still retained quite a few of his childish traits. Usa-chan did frequently accompany him to lectures, and was a bit of a hit with the rest of the class. In fact, Usa-chan became the class mascot not too long into first term.

NSFW Headcanons

Tamaki

Versatile. Can go from a good boy whining but taking it like a champ one minute, only to switch up and use that charisma and princely desire to pull one over on his partner (consensually, ofc) the next moment.

It may have been a joke in the beach episode, but this boy is indeed into bondage! Restraints, blindfolds, harnesses. He doesn't mind if he's tying up his partner, or if he's the one being tied up!

When subbing, he loves puppy play. He's just a good boy who needs you to tell him he's a good boy, petting him and rubbing his tummy while giving him treats for being so perfect and precious (whether in a feedist scenario or not). Kinky, stop projecting ffs

Haruhi

A switch, but does prefer topping. You've got to be the right kind of top/dom to get her to step down, basically. I feel like Haruhi's love language is mainly acts of service, with a smattering of words of affirmation, combine beautifully to make a service top who knows what she's doing.

When in full dom mode, she loves total control of her sub. They do as she says, or she'll keep them "in suspense" until they cry. Could certainly be an excellent brat tamer for the right sub, but it depends if she can be bothered to have that much attitude aimed at her. I mainly see the brat tamer dynamic working for HikaHaru, rather than any other ships, though.

Wants to hear her partner come undone, but is happy to use a gag on them if they whimper loud enough for her to hear. Actually kind of enjoys the challenge of trying to make them so loud that the gag doesn't do much of anything.

Kyoya

Kyoya is a sub, a bottom (because they are not mutually exclusive) and a pillow prince, I'll take no criticism at this time, thank you. He just melts in so many kink scenarios where he's told what to do, from being pampered to being tortured. He'll try topping for the right person, if they really wanted him to, but it's much more likely that you'll have a surprisingly needy brat on your hands.

Blindfold him and tell him he's pretty. Worship him with your voice and hands, and make him feel like he's the most precious thing in the world. He'll start crying, I promise, and then you'll get to see cute tearstains on that lovely blindfold. (He loves the feeling of support while being so incredibly vulnerable, it's not something he's had much of before)

He's either so silent when he cums that some partners would barely notice (and proceed to just overstimulate him to the point of multiple orgasms - but he loves that), or the loudest goddamn sub ever. The quietest whimper, or the loudest fucking screaming and begging to cum, absolutely no in-between.

Kaoru

Surprisingly, prefers topping. His act with Hikaru had him as a power bottom (thank you ohshc manga for spelling that out plain as day). I highly doubt he'd want a sub dynamic with someone he actually wants a relationship with (whether romantic or purely sexual), as it'd just make him think of hosting with his brother (ew!)

Though, this boy is still a Hitachiin. Loves humiliation. Will be using your kinks against his partner in order to embarrass them (again, consensually). Think comments like "wow, can't you keep it together? We're practically in public", while doing everything he can to push his partner's buttons.

Kaoru will lick his partner dry when they're done, cleaning them up with nothing but his tongue. As long as he has time on his hands, at least. It's a talented tongue, and half the time it just starts another round off again. How bad, what a shame /s.

Hikaru

Says he's a top, but actually is a bratty power bottom (how the turn tables). He wants to be fucked hard, and if it's not to his liking then he will let his partner know. Teasing, jeering, everything. Loves making whoever he's with pissed off while their fucking him. It just makes it rougher, even more passionate, and he just wants his brains fucked out of his pretty little head.

Bullying kink. Some slight bimbo/stupification leanings, honestly. Wants someone to talk down to him like he's just too stupid to function. They'll get something sharp and snarled in response, but his eyes and erection are begging them to keep pushing. Call him every name under the sun, shove him around, step on his crotch. He'll fight it, duh, but it gets to the point where he's just too turned on and needy to continue, and then he can be fucked to his partner's content.

Wants multiple orgasms (most of the time), and what he wants, he gets. If his partner doesn't get him off enough times before stopping, he will just touch himself until he gets another one or two in. If his dom can't stop him first, that is.

Mori

Service top, gentle dom. If his partner wants him to be any degree of mean, there's going to be a lot of trial and error, as well as a lot of talking about it before hand. It's going to take a while to build up to Mori using his massive strength and such on his partner (but it'll be worth it when he gets there, trust me)

No restraints but his hands and weight. Well, maybe on request, but he wants to pin his partner down himself, using those big hands to pin their wrists, pressing his weight down on them so he can feel every buck and shudder. Why should he let some metal and scraps of fabric do what he takes pleasure in?

His voice goes so deep when he's on the edge of an orgasm, encouraging his partner to just keep going, so good, feels so nice. Deep and breathy, all at once. A quiet guy, but so pretty to hear. He also likes his partner being loud about their own pleasure, does like to try and make them beg a little. He just wants to know they're having a great time.

[bunniehunn]

Here she is! My yuusona!!!! She literally looks like a carbon copy of me 😭

Name: Yuubeni Chōga.

Species: Human.

Dominant hand: Right.

Height: 160.03 / 5’3

2nd year / sophomore.

Best subject: Art.

Hobbies: Art, fashion, growing flowers.

Pet peeves/dislikes: People who talk down to her, liars.

Favorite food: Grilled tuna with rice and teriyaki sauce.

Least favorite food: Gnocchi. (She can’t handle the texture).

Talent: Helping people out.

Nicknames: From Floyd; Maomao-Chan (from the pink maomao.) Rook; Trickster dame papillion.

One night in her room as she drifted asleep finally despite her insomnia, she found herself transported to the world of Twisted Wonderland. When she realized she was trapped in a coffin, she almost had a mini panic-attack before she was broken out by our lovely Grim. She was immediately enamored by the cat monster even though she was a bit freaked out by, y’know, the whole talking cat thing. Of course, she ran away when he started using his magic. Then, the plot of the series goes as is!

Despite her being an extremely anxious and frazzled girl who’s a bit all over the place, she’s scarily competent as a beast tamer! Professor Trein absolutely despises her because of her constantly falling asleep in his class, not solely because she’s bored, but because of her insomnia depleting her hours of sleep. Despite her tendencies, she loves to learn and is intelligent, but has bad grades. It seems she uses all of her capabilities when helping other people, but falls short for herself. She always seems somewhat stressed, the constant dark circles under her eyes and sometimes disheveled appearance showing that.

Back in her old world, she has a pretty normal family. Both parents, an older sister, and multiple family animals. As soon as she realized she might not be able to go back in front of the Dark Mirror, she almost broke down on the spot. But, that’s way too embarrassing for her, so she kept it in. Her family isn’t neglectful at all, but they inadvertently caused her struggle with grades and school. They were a little too lax on her, causing her to lose any sort of motivation to keep trying. Whenever she hits a wall, she seems to give up immediately. Striving for her parent’s attention when she didn’t have any feedback became old, so she just… gave up. That paired with her adhd, especially unmedicated in the world of Twisted Wonderland, causes her to struggle in school. Of course, now with her abundance of friends who’re always motivating her, she’s slowly getting better.

★彡

guys I MIGHTVE projected onto her a little (a lot) 😥 the ramshackle uniform is kinda basic but I just really wanted a design that would match Grim.

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

Im no longer the inner joke anon, I am now INNER JOKE DEMON!!

And I thought of something really funny that when common reader just say to the rich folks when given some food they really can't tell the difference

Like stakes, they can't tell the difference between the one you get at a stake house to the rich one and they only said

" the exspensive one just have gold flakes, and have no nutrition value other then being pretty, over all good stake "

With the host club

Lololol newly dubbed Inner Joke Demon

Enjoy

🖤🖤🖤

They are horrified!

How could they sleep when their darling has such an unrefined palate

They are suddenly shoving every rich type of food in front of you

Pleading with you to taste the decadent difference

“Here Here! (Y/n)-chan! Have some of this couture cake! So? Is it better than commoner cake? It’s better right?”

Even Kyoya’s irked as you nonchalantly write off the golden crusted meal he prepared in front of you

“T-this is truly unprecedented.”

The twins and Tamaki are the forefront of this spectacle

Shoving different foods into your mouth as they goad you for a favorable response

“Sorry you guys, it just tastes the same!” 

Haruhi will probably back you up if only to throw them off their game

Unless bribed with fancy tuna she pretty much agrees with you

But even then I can see you making cup of noodles for them  and just making it look pretty to get a reaction

“Wow!!! (Y/n)! To eat such decadence from a deity’s hands themselves! I’m befallen with ecstasy.”

“Thanks but that's actually just a cup of noodles. I didn’t have to do a whole lot.”

“WWWHATT!?!”

Even the twins are beside themselves when you come out of the kitchen in 30 minutes with something you made

“This is–” “really good (Y/n)” “Maybe you should make our food all the time.”

When they all finally accept their defeat they recover enough to have this work to their advantage

“(Y/n). Will you make more tomorrow?”

“You want more? Then sure I’ll put some aside for you.” 

Everyone else is quick to ask for more of the commoner food you prepare

Mostly because you made it touched it with your hands but because there isn’t much of a difference after all