#trying to channel those emotions yknow | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

unproduciblesmackdown · 5 months ago

Text

on that note had also been thinking about the hilarious classic maneuver of taking things i go "smh always doing that weird/wrong" & instead putting it in the context of like oh i dunno my life experiences. like going "smh once again in one millisecond i noticed something was about to fall & just sort of Tensed instead of instantly going to catch it & in the next milliseconds hash out like 'oh but could i catch it. oh but now it's in progress am i too late' etc" but like well hang on. first of all the Tense Up / Brace For Impact approach can have its strengths too. second of all like why just kick myself when Of Course the vastly more frequent & relevant experiences of having to stifle reactions & tense up to Brace For Impact / Weather The Situation means that's the standard approach. sure tends to be the case that like "okay test your reflex time :)" type things when i Know It's Coming, i.e. preemptively Tense Up, i turn out quite slow. throwback to a true classic [my roommate that said my cat was performative while their cat did things out of true emotion] at my doctor's appointment at like age thirteen when the ol Knee Bonk Reflex Test would make me Tense/Seize That Knee Up and Then kick. and then afterwards my "big fan of unprompted criticisms / declarations about your internal experiences or true intentions" mom was like you were faking those reflexes. i'm like well i wasn't. she was like yes you were. consider the camera jimmed

secondly i was also thinking like, always been the case that when Talking, often even if in writing format, i can't really avoid mirroring the characteristics of the other person's Style / Patterns lol. was thinking about it in my Relative ease of adopting pronunciations for different language's phonemes when it's like, i guess i do have experience in Doing Voices not b/c i really often Did Voices (sometimes lol, as like, direct quotes or whatever. echoing....) but b/c like i'll just be picking up all kinds of mannerisms / tendencies / ways of speaking, including accents slightly (my default accent being disney channel) not b/c i'm messing with anyone or trying to do anything, in fact trying Not to do this is generally unsuccessfully & This Is What Happens Naturally & always has & it's like yknow what i think it might have to do with the fact that i don't think Talking in general is oh so "natural" for me / a matter of "just being myself" (things virtually never are lol) like. i think that time i had that friend in second grade where i'm like ummm i'm not sure we spoke the same language b/c i'm not sure we spoke hardly ever? but we had fun & played & amused ourselves etc til the teacher as usual went Biggest Time Sicko Mode on our "not paying attention" like nobody else's got & then didn't give a fuck abt "intervening" again when we didn't feel like we were Allowed(tm) to interact at all. & like i'm pretty sure i'd be "supposed" to feel like omg we don't talk (almost) at all?? that's SO weirrrd i remember that soooo welllll

and when i Do talk most "naturally" / "just being myself" it's all at once, wordy, and Theatrical, and even then. i did it some the other day and was Sweating, literally, less so figuratively but it does still feel demanding, and of course even when it doesn't Feel thusly, doing a Lot a lot of verbalizing can really still be draining to Taxing. and i've noticed better like yeah sometimes i'm markedly struggling to speak when i'm already extra wearied. and another thing i put into context better was like "when i'm being put tf through it why do i tend to cry through interactions. b/c i'm being a PUSSY????" like lol just on principle was like okay well who cares, i'm sure you, by which i mean i, have my reasons b/c so too would i think someone else does, like. and i remember like, i tend to Not "directly" cry of stress or sadness virtually ever. while i Do tend to be simply keeping that shit contained but Exactly When i have to try to speak? is when i happen to start crying. hmm. Hmmmm. talking Always this performance that i may often not be up for. similar to [personal visual style / Look / clothes] like my default is "basic outfit i'd want to wear every day" & my ideal is "i do not want to be perceived" & (this &) everything else is performance / drag to me, Would That that always be on my terms

another banger is my till oh so recently kicking myself like "aah [pathologization time] i'm sooo slow to be at ease / comfortable around people even when they're surely being nice, what a hassle for others" like well it can be viewed as a hassle for me but it's also like, wait, i end up having stayed uncomfortable around people who weren't being That nice by putting in That much [any effort from any Consideration] and often turn out like. ultimately not that Safe. and i look at "oh right yeah and also i sure Can be like instantly quite comfortable / at ease around people, including people i literally just met. so" &/or my not being at ease either is still way less of a deal than having to literally/figuratively sweat it while i'd feel so much more Okay avoiding detection much less interaction

#speaking of b/c like ''um just talk to someone'' There May Not Be Any ''Just'' Abt Any Mode Of Communication #ableism everywhere? lack of consideration? there's no ''Just'' being in public or around Anyone or in Any kind of interaction??#shit about the ''''work'''' of Hard(tm) Conversations With Friends like that's oh you know; literally personal. it Needs Specific Context #saying contextless shit about ''ohh nobody wants to Work for marriages i mean dating i mean family i mean friendships anymoreee''#like that is Meaninglessly vague & removed from context as mentioned #& my god will that result in the Sample Provided: Ambient Ableism / Abuse Culture #these godforsaken Pathologized [experiences of abuse] [experiences of being disabled] havers Ruining My Life / being bad people....#anyway as always. i will talk A Ton more than most are willing to process much less acknowledge. i will also Not Talk more than most #will tolerate either. ppl think I Never Talk or that b/c i'm not talking hardly ever this is the only way that i can be. lol #other things ''parent who makes things up about you And loves to drop unsolicited criticisms / boundary issues'' like a favorite one #was that when i was learning to write i ''drew'' letters initially. as opposed to doing True Writing. like #also of course that i was always ''shy'' vs keeping to myself / not liking 'Unstructured' Play b/c like #yeah no shit i know there's Secret Structures/Rules i don't do ''right.'' i know it's not safe to just do whatever around adults or peers.#yes even when the peers are three or four. learning shit speedrun From Birth; old enough to ostracize & reproduce ''norms'' no prob lol

4 notes · View notes

mariska · 9 months ago

Text

super random specific thing for me to ramble abt on tumblr lmao but. just woke up a lil bit ago, chillin in the living room, waiting for my "morning" medications dose (i woke up at noon today but. yknow. First Meds Of The Day Regardless, lol) to kick in so i can go brush my teeth and change into clean clothes and i usually keep something on tv as like 'background noise/visuals' whenever i'm waiting for meds to kick in, or just kind of in general when im in the living room by myself and not doing any kind of specific task, and usually i put it on like disney channel/disney xd/nick/cartoon network etc etc U Guys Know Me U Get The Idea, I Enjoy Cartoons And Such.

one of my moms must have been watching tv before i woke up today though cus it was on the Science Channel (not Syfy but the one thats abbreviated like 'SCI' in the corner) and when i first turned the tv on it was playing a show about unanswered theories/questions as to how things in the universe work, which is a topic that is one of my absolute fav special interests, so i was like. ooooh ok no cartoons for me today i will be listening to this tv show relay information that i have mostly already heard before bcus I Like That Kinda Stuff (previous episode was abt black holes as a topic which i personally think is almost always fun to hear abt since so many ppl have so many different theories regarding what a hypothetical 'journey' through/into a black hole might include and also all the people talking abt it were specifically including the fact that they were theories and we do not as a whole have a definite scientific answer yet to a lot of specific information abt what happens to an astronomical object of any kind deep into a black hole which i respect, i hate when ppl on these kinda shows voice theories and then are like 'and you just simply cant deny it! thats the only logical conclusion!' NO!!! THATS NOT SCIENCE. anyways. LMFAO)

REGARDLESS THAT IS NOT THE POINT, the point. is that its been a while since i've watched a 'space science' show like this one and i forgot. that while they do share rly cool info that i love hearing about. they are. SO. ANNOYING. ABOUT. THE MUSIC USED IN THE BACKGROUND SCORE OF LITERALLY EVERY SCENE SHOWING DEMONSTRATIONS OF WHAT THEY'RE TALKING ABT.

its ALWAYS gotta have some ridiculous intense wannabe Armageddon 1998 type of action/thriller/suspense film score shit and it is SO distracting to me. i just want to hear the nice Scientist people talk about their ideas of what an abstract view of the inside of a black hole might look like. and the music in the back EVERY TIME is like.

DUN DUN DUN DUN.....bdududududu DUN! DUN!! DUN!!! DUNDUNDUNDUNDUN!!!!!! .....BWWWAAAAMMMM

LIKE SHUT UPPPPP LMFAOOOOO its so annoying!!!! if i wanted to watch a space themed action movie i would watch a fuckin space themed action movie i just want to hear people talk about space!!!!!!

also this last thing is just a personal preference of mine that i'm sure would probably unintentionally bother people different from me in the same way that the action movie score thing bothers me, but i personally think that so much of the stuff that is covered and talked about on shows like these is so much more deserving of a musical score that evokes feelings of like. discovery, imagination, curiosity, astonishment, acceptance. instead of what usually seems to be trying to evoke like. fear, suspense, existential dread, confusion, anxiety. why do we make shows highlighting scientists talking about what we yearn to know regarding the universe we're all contained in if not to inspire the hypothetical audience watching that show? why would we want to score visual demonstrations of those topics in a way that creates fear and anxiety instead of more positive emotions that could be way more affirming to the individual curiosities of the audience?

this is becoming an Actual Special Interest Full-On Ramble Post so i'll make this my last paragraph i promise LMAOO that was not my intention making this post. but like. in my personal case, when i was a kid i was TERRIFIED of space. like, all of the stuff they talk about in these 'unanswered questions of the universe' shows was legitimately a huge source of severe anxiety and terror to me for pretty much my whole childhood, and it was in large part because every time i saw media with that as a core subject, even passively in the background of a room or something, it was presented as Inherently Scary. scary music, everything exploding in crappy lil 3D demonstrations (which like they still do but at least some of the vfx has improved over the yrs lol), clips of people in lab coats saying stuff like "and that's why if anything over THIS big EVER hit our planet we would ALL BE DEAD WITHIN HOURS WITH NO CHANCE OF SURVIVAL". like?!?!?!? of course i was terrified of that shit lmao!!! there were so few outlets for me, in my US american small town childhood experience at least, to actually be curious about Space and The Universe and How All This Stuff Might Work and The History Of It All, and the easiest to consume pop culture versions of that were all played up to be as unnecessarily edgy and spooky as possible. and its a shame when i think back on how many more years i could have spent in my early life being fascinated by space like i am now and have been since my mid/late teens, because that curious special interest potential was always there in me, but it was constantly answered by the world around me as something to fear instead of something to marvel at. i am autistic and i've always experienced different types of synesthesia, which for me is usually very 'visual mental image/colors/shapes' in nature, so like. music scores in any given program matter to me and it absolutely shapes my potential enjoyment of that piece of media. thankfully as an adult i can appreciate artistic choices more that i may not personally enjoy but that do make sense to me from a narrative/storytelling perspective, but as a child who struggled to understand what i was learning about space and the history of the earth as an astronomical body and the universe in general i very much did not have that insight or appreciation. it just created a strong mental association between "space/universe type of science" and "inherently scary, terrifying, chaotic, avoid at all costs" in my head. that sucks shit dude. the universe is incredible and space is amazing and all of it deserves to be presented to curious watchers in a way that makes them feel happy and excited to learn more information beyond the episode, not shut more information out of their life due to fear.

idk. its not that serious i know i just wish more media based on presentation scientific information to people could be more conscious of How it's presenting that info cus putting a ridiculous over the top action score in the background of every digital recreation shot of space is like. Not A Great Way To Present It. especially when the real human people talking about the topic in the show are NOT bringing that kind of energy to the interview at all and just seem to enjoy sharing this scientific info that they study and want more people to be interested in learning abt and studying like to me it feels kind of dismissive of the stuff they're literally saying too. u guys need more ambient synth musicians on ur fuckin score teams dude dial down the Inception bwaaaams 😭

2 notes · View notes

cleaning-has-its-benefits · 2 months ago

Text

My own writing process is pretty messy and I don't think Im the most fit at giving advice, but I thought there wasnt harm in giving my two cents.

I don't know at what stage of the writing process you're at or how much experience you have, so my advice will be rather general.

-I think its always useful to learn more about writing in general (like story structure, character arc, etc) to help you in writing a fanfic for omori. may I recomend ellen brock's channel if you want a place to start? I believe she has a nice way of explaining things.

-it would also be useful to have in mind or know your strenghts as a writer, what aspect of writing you're best at. Im good at structure so I focus a lot on that and I benefit from plotting the story in cronological order, but maybe its a different case for you.

Now onto something more specific…

-Im not sure how to word this, but I think is important to have very clear what are the things you want to accomplish with your story or what are the things that it will have, or what the whole point is. This can take a lot of forms, so this is kinda vague, but it can be related to the theme of your story, its message (keep in mind a message isnt the same as a lesson, its just what the story is trying to say), or the reason you're writing it (like it being a 'fine, I'll do it myself' kind of thing, or smth).Its kinda like your expectations and the identity of the story. Maybe you could write down a list about all of this, even the most basic of things is worth remembering.

what is the 'genre' (so to say). angst? fluff? bittersweet? comedy? what is the theme? recovery? moving forward? a sentence maybe, rather than a broad concept? or is it a question the story tries to answer (there are a lot of ways on how to approach a theme)

you can also write down a list of things your story isnt going to be about or it isnt going to include, like ending with a tragic ending (or ending with a happy ending), maybe a trope you dislike, being too sappy or too go-lucky, anything you can think of.

-with the set-up you're going with, a post-good ending scenario + 4 more aditional years, you will work with characters that have already gone through development, both from the game's story and the off-screen development you might give to them. even if you're not going to include in your story those 4 years of timeskip, it would be useful to at least have a decent idea of what has happened to each character during that time, so you will now at what place/mentality they're at by the beggining of your story.

-it also always useful to do some studies of the scenes in the game to understand the characters, assuming you haven't done that already. when it is about studies, you can read other people's analysies or wathc videos, or replay/rewatch the scenes yourself and take notes on one specific character, such as their behaviour and what they might be thinking/ the reasoning behind their choices and actions.

-I kinda feel like most of my advice is more of a matter of opinion and preference rather than 'objetive', so I think my last objetive thing to say would be for you to make your own list of guideliness on how to approach writing a fic.

-oh yeah, another thing you can do is to read post-good ending fics and find out yourself what you like or dont like about them to have a better understanding of how you would write one of these.

so the following things I'll mention are more of an opinion than anything.

-my general rule when writing an omori fanfic is to remain faithful of what the game stands for. for this reason, I dont like post-good ending fanfics where Sunny decides to commit suicide anyways or that are overly grim. I mean, its a possibility, but I feel like they kinda miss the point of the good ending, yknow? I prefer a tone that's more bittersweet, one that kinda hurts but that retains hope, and has a good balance of scenes that are fluffy and angsty and nostalgic, basically that go through all the emotions. with a good dose of the power of friendship as well, of course.

-about character growth, like I mentioned before, the characters, specially Sunny, have already gone through some character development. I find it anoyying in sequel movies or such where the conflict kinda makes it seem like the characters have forgotten everything they learned the first movie. With fics of this kind I follow a similar logic, of keeping in mind what 'lessons' the cast has learned after the events of the game.

Now this can be kinda tricky with this kind of fic, because one can say that since healing is not linear, then it makes sense that a character might fall on old habits they have supossedly overcome. I think the way to work with a case like this is to acknowledge that the character has befallen on bad habits. so like, give them a reason why they are acting agaisnt what they have learned, rather than it being like these movies where the characters never aknowledge what they learned and seem to have forgotten about for no reason.

Im not sure if I explained myself in a clear way, but as an example I can think of, a bad fanfic regarding this would be one where, after moving to a new home, Sunny has tried and failed and has given up, now living once again as a shut-in distracting himself with his imagination from his disapointemnt in himself and after some time of this Kel has to go to his rescue by knocking on the door and getting him out to remind him the good on life.

this would be a case of these bad sequel movies because not only this is repeating the same plot of the game, but also its denying all of what Sunny had to struggle and persevere to get out of this lifestyle.

Now, what I find would be a good example of a fic of this kind, would be one where Sunny has had a bad day, or a bad streak, and it has gotten a bit too much for him so he endev up spending a whole day/days in his room doing nothing. Sunny feels ashamed of himself for going back to this, when he has supposedly left it behind, and maybe he end ups indulgin in self-deprecation for a while, but he realices this is getting him nowhere, so he decides to call Kel and let him know of what is happening and asks him for help. then Kel goes to help Sunny, maybe at first just giving him some company at home since Sunny its not feeling like challenging himself right then, but after a while Sunny feels better and lets him know he would like to go outside for a while and asks him to accompany him on a simple walk or smth, something simple to get back at the place he had reached or smth.

so this here is a pretty similar plot from the bad example, but there are some key differences:

1-Sunny hasn't permanently backtracked his character development. its made clear this is a bump in the road, so to say 2-Sunny akcnowledges he 'is meant to have left this behind' and he reacts to this, by feeling ashamed 3-even if he has fallen back on this habit, he hasn't forgotten the lessons he learned, and here he remembers the lesson of 'rely on your friends when you need it' 4-Sunny takes initiative in the story rather than relying completely on Kel to move the plot forward

ok Im not sure if these examples are the best but I hope you get what Im trying to say.

-about characterization… I dont think Im the best at this, but one thing I learned that I find interesting is that a characters strenghts and flaws aren't too disconected.

for example, Sunny, in the game, is a coward, and his first solution for whenever problems arise is to run away from them. For this, throught the game he has to make a concious effort to not listen to his first impulse of running away and instead face his problems even when he is really scared. For this, you could say that Sunny is someone who makes an effort in being brave when he needs to be.

On Kel's side… actually I think a 'not-to-do' I can tell you is to not treat Kel like he's an absolute moron. Kel's flaw isnt so much about stupidity but rather him being impulsive and sometimes acting without the full context or lacking information. I think he also can sometimes be prone to jump to conclusions for this. At the same time, he's less likely to get caught-up in self-doubt and for that not taking action at all, so we could say he's someone who takes initiative and can lead others to do the same.

I've kinda focused my examples on Sunny and Kel since you mentioned you were writing a suntan story… and I cant really give any advice on that because Im terrible at writing romance.

this ended up being longer than I expected… eh I hope this can be of some use to you. sorry for any typos, I wrote this on notepad because tumblr is laggy

Asking advices when writing an Omori fanfic (Post good ending)

So I'm writing an Omori fanfic that takes place 4 years after the good ending and everyone forgives Sunny and Basil (with time of course), I wanna hear your advices and help when writing an Omori fanfic, in terms of character growth, their flaws and weaknesses, their growth, and when it comes to shipping (specifically for me, Suntan).

So what should I do and shouldn't do when writing an Omori fanfic?

3 notes · View notes

rek1s-headband · 4 years ago

Note

hi could i request something? basically just HCS about langa and reki when you guy get into a fight or sum idk LMFAOO, you dont have to do this if you dont want to tho <3

➯ A/N: Thank you for the request! I hope you enjoy. I added a few characters, hope you don’t mind:)

➯ When you guys get into a fight

➯ Characters: Langa Hasegawa, Reki Kyan, Kaoru Sakurashiki, Kojiro Nanjou, Hiromi Higa and Miya Chinen x gn reader

➯ Warnings: angst if you squint, fluff

Langa:

Ok the majority of your fights are generally because of a miscommunication. If things aren’t spelled out for the poor boy, he’ll be completely oblivious to what’s bothering you

When you finally snap, he always seems shocked, asking why you hadn’t said anything sooner, even if you’d been trying to hint at it all week

Not really one to shout, but if things get heated enough he might snap. He always feels awful afterwards though. No matter what, he really believes no one should be screamed at because of something as silly as a disagreement

Rarely storms out, he’s always going to try and stay until the end to try and get something, anything out of you that he can use to try and understand your point of view

Understands space. He knows when you dont feel like talking to him, and he will give you that time to collect your thoughts. When you’re ready to speak again, he’s all ears

Gets overwhelmed really easy. It doesnt really show in what he says, but when you raise your voice his brain goes to putty and he can feel his breath get narrow. He’s not scared, he just doesn’t want to be the reason you’re feeling like this.

Never lets you go to bed angry. He’ll give you your space, but if you’re still quiet by bedtime he’s making sure you’ve eaten and you’re not still really upset by whatever played out that day

Overthinks a lot. How long did he not realise you were upset? What if its actually a much bigger deal than you’re letting on? What if you leave? Of course, he knows a lot of it is completely irrational, but it still lingers in the back of his mind, so you can imagine how relieved he is when the fight is over and you’re back in his arms

Asks people for advice a lot. Reki and Cherry are usual helpers, giving Langa their opinions on the matter without going into too much detail. The rest is up to him.

Gives the best hugs and comfort after a fight. He understands couples can fight, and never really takes the aggression let out by the pair of you too seriously. Rubbing the back of your head and holding you close to his chest, he’ll reassure you that he’s not going anywhere, that he’s not going to leave “just because of a silly fight” while you fight back tears on his shoulder.

Reki

Unlike Langa, Reki is a very open person in terms of his feelings, so your fights are rarely because of closed away emotions. However, many are caused by you feeling he is spending too much time in his workshop, overworking himself and not spending as much time with you as he should.

As for Reki, he gets mad when he feels you’re being closed off from him, not telling him things and hiding your true emotions. It’s not that he doesnt trust you, he just doesnt want you shouldering anything by yourself, and tries to make things easier for you by halving the problem.

A very emotional person, and this really shows when the two of you argue. There’s a lot of tears, a lot of raised voices, yknow those exhausted laughs when you’re tired of arguing with someone? Those. He pulls at his hair a lot in frustration too

Both of you need to walk away from each other a lot during arguments. You’re both driven by your emotions, so its hard to think logically once you’ve both gotten really upset.

The type to sit outside a door after an argument if you’ve locked yourself in a room, pressing against it and quietly talking to you, regardless of whether or not he gets a response

Understands space, to a certain extent. He’ll try and talk to you after an argument, try anything to get you to just answer him, to come out from your room, to stop ignoring him. He knows when you really don’t want to face him though, which is when he’ll go out for a while, either to Langa’s for advice, or just for a quiet skate.

Despite how upset he gets in the moment, he gets over it quickly. Once he’s out of his head and seeing properly, he’ll take some time to think it over and see things from your point of view. He’ll come back to you with an apology, and when you’re ready to talk, he’ll discuss things with you this time around instead of fighting

If the fight lasts overnight, he refuses to let you take the couch. If he feels a fight will last, he’ll glue himself to the couch, making it impossible for you to sleep anywhere other than your bed. No matter what the fight was about, he refuses to have you sleep uncomfortably.

Tends to cry after making up. It’s rarely out of sadness, of course, more relief than anything. He’s just happy to have you back in his arms, no longer ignoring him.

Cherry

A very rational person, fights are very rare between the pair of you. When you do fight, it tends to be because you feel he’s being closed off from you, not being as open and emotional with you. As for him, he doesnt like when you act too aloof about things that are actually serious to him

Fights start out quiet, talking in normal tones and using your heads. However, as the fight goes on, your voices gradually get higher and louder, arms thrown in the air as you get in each other’s faces.

He snaps quite a bit. Petty remarks, snappy replies and other unnecessary comments are thrown out without much thought as he gets more pissed off. Not necessarily because he doesn’t have anything to defend himself, but because once he’s started, he’ll do just about anything to piss you off

Depending on the fight, it could last an hour or a week. Both of you are so petty that you’ll refuse to apologise to the other, forgetting who was even in the wrong in the first place

Honestly, whoever goes to sleep first gets the bed, he’s not as considerate as Reki. However, as the fight goes on, the pair of you will stay up for ungodly hours into the night, trying to outlast the other because they dont want them sleeping on the couch. You’ll never admit that though, which is why you wont just fall asleep on the couch first. Besides, if you happen to fall asleep on the couch before Kaoru goes to bed, he’ll carry you upstairs and sleep on the couch himself. He’ll never admit that though, he’ll simply say you woke up and went upstairs in a hazy half-sleep, which is why you dont remember.

He’s definitely programmed Carla to apologise to you for him at least once, rolling her into the room you’re in before quickly walking out to the sound of “Y/N, I-am-very-sorry-and-I-was-wrong-please-forgive-me” in Carlas robotic voice

If you ever go to Joe’s restaurant to cool down, he’ll make a big fuss, swaying and sighing, dramatically shouting about “however will these lovers reconcile!?” Once his act is over though, he’ll comfort you and give you your favourite meal, tutting over the pair of you and thinking of ways to help you make up

Literally won’t let you go of you for at least a week after you fight. This mf is hanging off you, constant forehead kisses, the whole deal. He’s gone without your affection for a long time while you fought, he’s simply making up for lost time

Joe

You get really pissed at him when he flirts with other girls. He doesn’t mean to, he’s just a bit of a girl magnet and it’s his nature to entertain them. Of course, he all yours, but he forgets sometimes that jealousy is actually a thing

Doesnt take arguments as seriously as he probably should. He’s the type to tell you to “calm down” in the worst possible moment, its usually what makes you explode, actually.

Absolutely dense. The type to listen to you shout for five minutes, and only then have the audacity to ask you just what your problem was

It’s not his fault, bless him. He’s just a little unobservant when it comes to your emotions. When he realises you’re actually upset though, he’s apologising profusely and promising to never do it again

His apologies are always so genuine, you generally forgive him. However, if he does something that really pisses you off and you dont forgive him, he’ll give you space to think

Fights are usually resolved within a day. Like Langa, he refuses to let you go to bed angry

Cooks for you every meal regardless of whether or not you eat it. He’ll leave meals outside your door as a sort of truce, quietly pressing against the door and asking you to please come eat with him, that he hates the idea of you holed up in there all alone

Like Kaoru, he tends to reply with snarky remarks that have little to do with the argument, but they have a little less bite to them. More petty, if anything

Another big reason for why fights never last long is because this man literally. Will. Not. Survive. Without. You. You’ll be trying to ignore him while he comes in every five minutes, asking you how to get a certain channel on the TV, or stupid things you know he’s only asking because he misses talking to you

After you make up, he literally wont even look at another girl for at least a week. Mf will literally turn his head the other way if a girl comes near him, shouting about how he’s spoken for

Shadow

The biggest hothead. He says a lot of things he doesn’t mean in the moment, which will cause you to storm out and he’ll immediately regret it

The fight almost immediately escalates past hushed voices, swear words thrown around as you get in each other’s faces

He’ll get really upset, but he’ll mask it with being pissed off and angry, clashing pots around and acting like a literal baby. He doesnt want to admit it, but he always feels awful right after a fight. He knows youll need a bit of space after the intense shouting, so he’ll give you that space before even attempting an apology

Aggressively cares for you. Like he’ll say things like “I made food, it’ll taste like shit if you leave it, so I suggest you have it now” or “nope, I want the couch, I’m gonna watch something” he’ll never admit it, he just wants to make sure you’re alright even while fighting

If the two of you go to S while fighting, it’ll be very obvious. Usually you’re attached at the hip, but now you couldn’t be further apart. However, he’s still looking out for you, keeping an eye on you to make sure you’re alright. If you’re ever getting hit on by some creep, the fight is forgotten and he’s back at your side, daring the stranger to come any closer to you.

Reki is always the first to notice, poking him and pushing you over to him, trying to get the two of you to make up. Surprisingly, it actually does help clear the air

He can never stay mad at you for long though, he’s completely soft for you

Makes you bouquets to try and apologise. He’s taught you a lot about the meanings of flowers, so he’ll specifically pick ones with hidden meanings like “I’m sorry” or “I love you”

Not very good with verbal apologies. He knows when they’re needed though, and they are usually delivered through a series of grumbles and sad expressions. The thought is there though

Gives very gentle, long hugs after you make up. He’ll hold you close, suggesting a date or a movie to help the two of you relax

Miya

Literally the biggest bitch out of the six to fight with. He’s so petty, he will refuse to admit he’s wrong for the longest time. Once he’s in, there’s no accepting he’s not right

At least for a while anyway. He’ll start to feel bad once he sees just how upset you’re getting, frustrated with his inability to see anyone’s point of view but his own

King of the silent treatment. He’ll hide away behind his switch, drowning out his guilty thoughts with the white noise of animal crossing

He’ll skate to take his mind off things, practicing new tricks until he’s exhausted

Makes really snide remarks that have absolutely nothing to do with the argument. The type to bring up shit that happened 4 months ago just to help his case

Reki is usually the one to make him see sense, telling him just how petty he’s being, and that he cant get so defensive when he’s in the wrong. He knows this, obviously, he just can’t help it sometimes.

Although he’s not one for real apologies, he’ll slowly begin to stop ignoring you, bringing you small snacks or sending you funny things he saw on his phone. He’ll sit beside you, acting as if it was completely unintentional, but will slowly inch closer and closer until he’s curled up at your side, mumbling about how he wasn’t completely right after all

Will literally hit anyone who tries to comment on how the pair of you have made up, talking about how “its not even that big of a deal, just shut up”

Ad*m

Yall fought cause y’know. He’s ad*m

Sat outside your house with a speaker and an ugly ass sign. It started raining and his sign got ruined and his makeup ran

You broke up with him and he cried

Slipped in the rain while leaving <3

1K notes · View notes

icharchivist · 2 years ago

Note

the ssr epilogues! i actually did stumble into one of these by accident—when you mentioned tsuzuru’s SSR had mizuno’s letter in it I mistakenly assumed that the story associated with the card would contain the contents of the letter? so I ended up watching that. it was very sweet and nice. now, seeing nocturnality I wonder if all of these have the characters like sort of transported to the play/real world? it’s interesting. i STILL have questions abt the vampire hq tho (unless i missed smthing?). but anyways the WAY kota describes his and reo's relationship to azuma as “you… look like a friend of mine. he took care of me for a long time, so just think of this as me paying it forward” LIKE THE MEANING INHERENT IN ALL OF THAT!!!! like the way reo is draining his blood and everyone thinks that reo is a freeloader or leeching off of him and kota is the only one who understands it differently. the way that here when azuma gets attacked, he jumps into action and saves him! which is a reversal from before where he’s just there helpless… it was also sooo lovely how all of winter troupe was worried abt azuma, and the little differences between kota and tasuku and how azuma prefers tasuku as he is... its so nice. and then the way it went back to kota finding that he had more food than usual and he understood it to be reo? the way that reaffirmed his committment to finding him? sooo good. tasuku's backstage was also so funny. "how could you put garlic in the steak omi! its seriously dangerous to hisoka and azuma!" like i love how its just like. he takes all his concern for those two and channels it thru a "seeing them as vampires" lens but does not once think abt like. wow what if they are dangerous. so in character of him to be that way. also,,, ty for the note abt that winter troupe fight with azuma and tasuku! i had blocked most of it out of my memory bc i avoid conflict lol but thats such a good point.

the events in general are also soooo worth it for me... like, I feel they give me a much better understanding of all the characters, particularly ones I hadn't thought abt for a lot. like even the first two play events, i felt like that was rly what got me invested in itaru, and same w/ kazunari for sardine search. that especially... with operation campgrounds and sardine search i feel like i reallllly began to like get a better sense of what he was abt and feel more attached. overall theyre like sooooo worth it though like wow. like as you say, with the stranger onward they just do not pull their punches in terms of what they do... like, I could see skipping some of the multitroupe events, but the event plays? they genuinely feel inextricable from the main story. so absolutely ty for helping me experience them! if i was playing on my own I wouldn't have known about it at all. there's... six more events to go before act 2 i think? so that'll be fun. i may try to speed thru them a little since i dont think i'll be in for quite as much emotional devastation, yknow?

WAOHOO glad you could get around to read those!! BUT YEAH MAN i love the Nocturnality epilogue, the way Kota and Azuma talk about the two they care for is woooohhhh. I loved to see Winter worrying for Azuma and the way Tasuku worries especially is just, muah and YEAH this idea that Kota is still looking for Reo and that Reo still drops by to do things for him which still gives him hope… these two…. I feel like it works very well as the epilogue since, we continue from Tasuku's add libbed determination and show us that it's not all lost for them, they still will find a way back to each other eventually. man. BUT YEAH TASUKU'S BACKSTAGE STILL KILLS ME. the whole way he gets angry at Omi still KILLS ME it's so funny. And yeah, he's so deep into his role he could have taken the whole vampire thing anywhere but instead it was just, protect and lvoe them and HOW DARE not adjust for them!! it was so good And you're welcome about that, the Azuma/Tasuku's fight means a lot to me since it's a set up to just how far they've come when Nocturnality ends, it makes me unwell, i always have to remind of it

i'm SO glad you're enjoying the events sobs!! I totally agree, i think even at the start it gives you even more stuff to be invested. The mainstory chapters tend to do an overview of each character and focus on the bond of the troupe as a group, while the event gives more individual focus which really ends up being so rewarding in terms of how to care for the characters. But yeah, some multi troupe events could be skippable because there's less weight in them, but the event plays are chokeful of character development it just wouldn't work without it. It's too important. I'm really glad i could share it that way with you <3333 i'm so so glad.

So as events goes, you have 5/6 depending on how you intend to read them:

-hAve A greAt trip -A Very Mankai Christmas -New Years & New Beginnings -3 Cheers for Mankai Company -Valentine's Magic

and here's the kicker: Chapter 5 of the main story was released there.

Then, there was One Day Princess. From what i remember tho, nothing in ODP evokes what happened in chapter 5, except for Itaru's backstage which will show Chikage.

Valentine's Magic is the Vday event and ODP is the Wday event, so it depends if you want to read those two events together before moving on to act 2 or want to stick to the canon chronology of the story Then timeline wise it's going to be one event/one main chapter/one event/one main chapter ect.. until you run out of main chapter for act 2 and it's only event left. so basically.

-Chapter 5 -One Day Princess -Chapter 6 -A Springtime Snooze -Chapter 7 -Conquering Misohiosa Island -Chapter 8 -Various Vows of Love -and then it's all the events that are left

so here you are :3c almost there. now i'm sure the rest of the events will be a breeze to go through before act 2 right? ahah. I mean when has a3 ever been heartshattering and soulcrushing when you least expect it ahahahah… ahahah….

have fun :3c

#ichareply #ichafantalks a3 #aranarumei

2 notes · View notes

fox-steward · 4 years ago

Note

Ugh you ever feel real nice and then ur emotions are like “waaahhh I’m a man inside why are you doing this ;w;” and ur reason and brain and smarts are like “god you dumb bitch I wish you’d just shut the fuck up, no the fuck you not. Godamnit I don’t care if you ‘feel better with a guy name and he/him pronouns’, shut up.” Some days it’s like a constant war and I wish my weird emotions would just shut the fuck up yknow? Maybe I’m just rambling here but I’m curious if u feel like that ever too?

i feel the sentiment of this ask, but must confess, i don’t struggle against an emotion that tells me “i’m a man” inside. that’s because i can’t comprehend what it means to “feel like a man.” sometimes i think it would be easier to be who i am if i were male—and that’s because society embraces masculinity in males and discourages it in females. but i am female, so i am a masculine woman. and that’s great! that’s just fine for me. i don’t need a broken society to tell me i’m alright, because i KNOW who i am is alright. ain’t a single thing wrong with being a masculine female.

it sounds like these thoughts/emotions cause you a lot of pain, and i wanna validate that (even tho i usually hate the world valid lmao). the way you react to your thoughts of wishing you were male (with what reads as anger) makes sense! if you were male, our society would embrace you, instead of cast you out; a male name, he/him pronouns would be cultural signifiers that you’re accepted—no wonder you feel more comfortable with them.

instead of reacting with anger and rejection toward the self who wishes they were male, could use a male name and he/him pronouns, what if you invited that part of you closer and embraced it. what i mean is, instead of “shut the fuck up,” what if you said, “you’re right, self, i WOULD feel more comfortable with a male name and he/him pronouns, because those would show the world that who i am belongs here, is ultimately okay. and it sucks and it hurts that as a female, my masculinity is rejected and discouraged. that pain of rejection gets channeled into wishing it weren’t so—if only if only i were male. but, i’m not. and that is always going to be the case. i know who i am is fine and good; masculinity in women is fine and good. there are people who will accept and embrace me, and while they’re harder to find in a broken society like mine, i can’t sacrifice who i am, my body or health, just to feel accepted within a sick society. “

i don’t know if that helps, but when i feel like something is wrong with me and everything would be easier if i were a male, i comfort myself—i say, you’re right, being masculine WOULD be easier if you were male, but you’re not. the reason being masculine as a female sometimes feels uncomfortable is NOT because there’s something wrong with it or you or your body, but because the society you live in is sick. it’s not fair, but it is your reality. so you can waste time wishing for things to be a way they simply never will be (aka, wishing you were male/pretending you are) or you can do the work of living with a straight back despite the sick society, as you are, steadied by the knowledge that you are fine as you are, ain’t nothing wrong with masculinity in women, and encouraged by the fact that younger girls will see in you an example of the future for themselves. imagine if you could have met a masculine woman who loved her own masculinity unapologetically; what would that have changed for younger you?

this doesn’t mean you have to be ideologically pure all the time and have these good reighteous thoughts or else you’re failing, but just try it. instead of berating yourself when you’re feeling as you described in this ask, invite that part of you to talk. what is it really asking for? what does it need to hear?

rooting for you my friend

#detrans #detransition #radfem #radical feminism #asked #answered #anon #ftm #gender #gender critical

39 notes · View notes

lesbianmarth · 5 years ago

Text

it’s been a while since i posted about aa but i just finished soj in its entirety tonight. here’s my new list so far

i still have to give thoughts on cases 4 5 and dlc so that’ll be under a cut. spoilers!

6-4: this was such a filler case, almost shamefully so. i don’t know why they thought they could manage to do this in the 4th case when every game with 5 cases has been pretty consistent about making the 4th case plot relevant, sometimes literally just a preamble to case 5. so yeah i think this one was kinda ass

the two things it had going for it: one, athena. in 6-2 i actually got confused about why i ever liked her, because in that case she felt like she was just acting the part of the Peppy Teen Girl With a Rowdy Streak that makes up almost every assistant character. But then as SOON as she started bantering with Simon in 6-4 i was like “oh, THAT’S why i liked her!” was nice to take control of her again.

two, uendo toneido. while i don’t think you can say the DID was portrayed with quite the necessary respect or kindness, it was handled better than i’ve seen other media handle it-- at least it’s not completely demonized. other people have written more on that in better detail so i’m not really the judge, but the basic point is that this witness was mad fun to read, and even the dumb jokes like the changing number of floor cushions were entertaining. thus why this case is in the “hard carried by one side character” tier.

especially since there was like nothing else going on. no connection to the main plot, only two other characters besides uendo, and for some reason the clown tits girl was here instead of the magic show case (and to be honest, she wasn’t enjoyable for me even BEFORE she did the standard aa female villain thing and changed her speech pattern as soon as she fell under suspicion). just a weird, nothing case stuck right around the point aa games usually enter endgame. And especially weird because...

6-5 part 1: inexplicably there are two separate cases in the final chapter and each gets one day of investigation and trial. such a weird setup, and it really shouldn’t work... but i think it kinda barely does. barely. it would still have been better to split it into case 4 and case 5 though.

i have a hard time articulating much on the first case bc it sort of blends together for me. the main thing is that the concept of it being a civil case where apollo and phoenix face off is really good. it was a good change of pace, even though you knew it was gonna be a murder somehow anyway. sarge was reasonably nice, i guess, paul atishon had some good animations and quirks (my favorite being when he tries to just walk away from the stand to avoid answering a question), and the logic of the actual murder was good enough.

but i especially got those strong “oh this is a FINAL case!” vibes during the segment in the cave, and that added so much to it even if not much of it was relevant in the first half of the case. the adventure feel reminded me of some of the (out of context bc i still havent played it) scenes i know from 3-5, which is a good association to invoke imo. and it did a lot to give apollo and dhurke time to bond.

speaking of which, dhurke, holy shit. what a KING. i don’t think i’ve ever liked a dad character in ace attorney this much. he’s so genuine and like down to earth that it’s impossible not to start liking him and believe how much he cares for his sons. the bit where he rescued apollo from the cave flood... i felt it in my heart

6-5 part 2: let me just get this out of the way: ga’ran sucks. her design after she goes full evil is so bad, she’s so malicious that it’s immediately obvious she’s going to be the culprit, her breakdown is ridiculous and just embarrassing to watch, and inga had already established way more charisma as a villain when he did the “those were orders of execution actually” bit in 6-3. with that said,

i actually liked it for the most part. the spirit channeling stuff was excellent imo-- they probably use it to similar or greater effect in 3-5 but as someone who again has not played that, i was surprised and almost impressed by how well it was applied. maya was relevant for something! it feels like it’s been ages!

rayfa was a little underutilized, i think-- her moment of determination where she stops letting ga’ran have control over her was alright but it fell flat bc it didn’t have any weight during the moment. i kept hoping she would like, wordlessly take of her shawl and do the little verbal preamble to the divination seance while ga’ran kept yelling at her to stop, but no, the script can’t be good like that, i guess. and since she didn’t get to be the investigation assistant for long, none of her charm in that role carried through.

but DHURKE!! oh my god! in a game almost devoid of emotional impact, his involvement in this case really hit. the way they painstakingly animated his death, the scene where he makes a promise with maya, and then the weight of knowing in hindsight that everything he did in the first part of the case was after he’d already died and just wanted to see his son again before passing on for real....... it hurt. i felt something during that section. this case would also be hard carried by him if not for the fact that i really liked the murder bits.

amara was good too--liked how they made her suspiciously serene and accentuated it with the lightning strikes to make her look like a hidden murderer character about to reveal herself, only to walk it back and confirm she was being forced to act that way. i thought it worked. nahyuta was boring though, i’m sorry-- i get the motivation with having to be a bastard bc his sister and mom were basically held hostage, but the only time i found him compelling in that mess was the bit where he removed his one fingerless glove and revealed he still has the dragon tattoo. that was it. athena was also completely unused the whole case (not even a single mood matrix? really?) and trucy one again went without any role of importance.

the ending also... yknow, a friend said they had to end it this way bc they never figured out what they were going to do with apollo (since following up on what they started in aa4 clearly wasn’t an option???) and just threw him on a bus to get rid of him. i agree with that-- he really feels thrown to the side, and with that i think trucy’s officially stranded with no hope of any character advancement. and the way they ended the game with phoenix and lamiroir deciding “yeah, maybe NOW we should finally tell those two they’re related” honestly felt insulting lol

but maybe the dlc case will let things go out on a high note...?!

6-6: it was okay.

it would’ve worked pretty well as a filler case in an older aa-- honestly i think it’d be one of the better filler cases, certainly worth replacing the shitty ones like 2-3 or 3-3 or, hey, 6-4. but whether i’d say it was worth paying for... eh.

the time travel conceit was done well enough, i think. the way they tied it back to sorin and pierce’s backstories was nice, and the twist about having two receptions was good, although they needed to treat that as a real twist with much more gravity. when the truth comes out it just feels like “oh of course that’s what happened” rather than a big surprise worthy of the Confessing the Truth theme. it’s sort of important because the case becomes a lot less interesting when you take out the time travel element.

far as characters are concerned, i think they needed more side characters to sell the whole thing-- another sprocket family member or another servant of the household. it felt a little limited-- sorin and pierce are pretty good witnesses and i like their quirks and their secrets, but the only alive woman (ellen) has very few traits and no connection to the deeper story of the case, so she falls really flat. the old aa characters didn’t add much- maya and edgeworth were just there for fanservice, ema didn’t get to do much other than acknowledge for the first time in years that she’s a big edgeworth fan, and larry is annoying as hell like he always is.

and oh my god i actually forgot while i was writing that, how they put in athena and trucy but only used them for brief slapstick where trucy would try to set athena on fire and shit. again-- no mood matrix? couldn’t even try once to fit those two characters into something?

i did like pierce’s transformation into his surgeon form though-- that was really cool. loved him doing surgery on a robot, taking xrays of the lawyers, and his breakdown was fantastic-- he would make a really good culprit if they didn’t whiff the last bit of pathos at the end. i don’t think he should’ve been aiming for revenge on sorin; it would have hurt much more if he was still loyal to the guy and never intended for him to be in danger, but the final “why’d you do it?” talk in the trial just felt flat and one-note, much like the one in 6-4.

... so that’s spirit of justice! not a super positive experience but i’m happy to say it’s done. as much as i want to go and replay dgs, i think when i do go back to ace attorney i’ll be replaying the trilogy for the first time since high school

#ace attorney #aa playthrough

24 notes · View notes

pestopascal · 5 years ago

Note

so i only just saw the announcement on the fhr server what happened while i was in something else i tried searching and everything seemed to come back to you lol

“comes back to me” LOL yeah so bee posted the blm donation post after people were all like “i need a break from social media” following malins post on the fhr tumblr and like it wasnt mean. it was just a Post with ways to help/raise awareness bc like ngl being all “oh i need a break” when like there is ZERO mention of blm before all this btw. terrible. but the mods deleted it ???? (not a single mod has admitted to being the one to delete it first). and then it got reposted under spoiler tags with like “tw police brutality/politics” which. its a donation post for blm. tone deaf. so then i reposted it again, and quite frankly ppl were chiming in with like why was it hidden under those tw and spoilers and that maybe it should be posted in the announcement channel instead of being lost in genchat (it took 2hrs for it to be a formal announcement still under tws). it RLY didnt dissolve until justaname chimed in with “this server isnt supposed to be leftist fox news” (a classic which will not be forgotten by the masses) and literally like the mods were ??? not here but the mits and cms were like either trying to help or just straight up “this server is supposed to be a safe space” like even MY post wasnt aggressive lol i just gave suggestions on how ppl could donate or stream to donate or if they want more information on first nations (bc everyone seems to believe i left out australia in this...????) but then mod cheion chimed in with “politics are on the trigger list” AGAIN and its like this is a donation post about blm YKNOW??? so then idk ppl tried to like non-apologise for comments and be all “how are ppl supposed to learn from mistakes from their comments” and encourage ppl to go onto different topics and kept saying that the donation post and blm was a “heavy topic” for a GAME that literally has “heavy topics” as its like core storytelling (which btw numerous people ALSO brought up was incredibly ironic and reminded everyone the server has been like that for a very long time) anyway madcatco literally called the server theirs LOL and was like literally take ur politics somewhere else (this game......... has politics involved btw)

like then ppl left it for maybe idk a lil while i hopped into the au server and snagged some screencaps of ppl just railing on me for literally bringing up racism bc thats bad apparently to point out racism??? also my MO is to be an asshole ❤️ and then it kicked off again as ppl read up and started criticising the mods and famous comment by trob of “we’re aware of smute” LMAOOOO like sry i tried being polite with dms and screenshots last yr to emma that mod who like was sarcastic af and trob and madcat (who also btw Hated smute and rei up until like. august last yr). anyway ppl started DIGGING and posting caps of rei and smutes antics on the server in genchat specifically (also that fucking post from saturn about smute skejfhskjdhf ) and then campaigning for ppl to be unblocked who were blocked like nina (contrary to ur opinion trob dont lie 2 us i have screenshots of u in the vent channel of the au server) and like ppl kept demanding why saturn was blocked and they REFUSED to answer why and still never outright admitted it and it kept GOING it was like absolutely hilarious and sad how many non-answers and non-apologies ppl got and they were like “oh but how do we help the server” and then ppl were like “wow i didnt realise the rot went this deep” bc sooooo many ppl were getting anons as well with just how deep smutes interaction with fhr went and it was like. incredible. also shout out to smute being the pet racist comment that was the FUNNIEST shit i’ve seen. only the mits and cms were actually trying to help btw. mods were nowhere to be seen. PPL WHO LEFT THE SERVER REJOINED like who swore off fhr all those huge content creators came back. wild. at some point i passed out, got banned by lime as a “knee jerk emotional reaction” alongside alex and seagull and i think there were others as well btw idk who and we got unblocked (im so sad that happened like an hr after i went to bed i MISSED it) and just madcatco SPLIT with no apology, idk cheion said smth but quite frankly idk it was words. lime dipped out. a whole bunch of ppl also split, ppl started POURING in again. like there was another non apology which was like ‘my mental health’ and idk man none of them still apologised for being racist mind you like that was the biggest and most absolute thing ppl kept bringing up and NONE of the mods apologised for being racist and wanting to do better. they just peaced out.

anyway now the mits are full mods, the old admin i think split after like being all “huh what i just fix up channels i dont work here” . trob is now just an admin and still being all tw drama LOL so we’ll see what happens with the server. i know ppl kept saying to make a new one but like the basic structure is there. ppl just gotta not be bought off by shitty copied art anymore yknow. who knows whats even gonna happen with the game anymore apparently malin May Return after the completion of the alpha or smth

OH AND smute’s fucking attempt at apology 2.0 sry honey but

20 notes · View notes

lizzybeth1986 · 6 years ago

Text

Quick Thoughts on The Royal Heir, Book 1 Chapter 1

• We're back! Hopefully with a better series this time, but I'm not going to keep my hopes too high.

• If my QTs are clogging up your dash, I recommend you block these particular tags: #trh quick thoughts, #trh qts, and optionally #long post.

• Much like my Book 3 QTs, I will be exploring as many playthroughs as I possibly can to see how each LI's route is being written. Last book, this experiment definitely helped me figure out that they were putting more effort into some characters and less into others, and I'd still like to keep an eye out for these things as much as possible.

• I feel this QT might be shorter than my usual (edit: joke's on me - it's not!! 🙈), mostly because the opening chapter itself is...pretty light, and is mostly meant for us to spend time and have fun with our chosen LI. Plus a tiny smidgen of buildup to the premise, which is having a child in Cordonia. But I do have a theory about the overall theme that I'm going to be expanding on towards the end of the chapter.

• Okay that's it for preliminary explanations, it's time for me to start with the chapter! XD

• Ooh. Oooooooh. This loading page now has tidbits about Cordonian society!! Interesting.

• Title: Happily Ever Afterwards

Alternative Title: Be Grateful We're Letting You Have This Much Sex For Free This Week, Because That's The Last Time It's Happening.

• I'm extremely offended they're making me wear that Pepto Bismol outfit again.

•

...thanks so much for reminding me you still don't care about Hana, PB! 🙄 Everyone else remains to be some version of "loyal", but Hana is still considered more for her skills than for her own steadfastness, even though she was the most hardcore-loyal of the four (SHE LEFT HER FREAKING HOME. HER FREAKING FAMILY. FOR YOU. While the other three were certainly loyal and honorable to the MC, they definitely didn't have to completely cut ties with their families to do right by the MC).

• The "fairytale" aesthetics of the frame story were what drew people into TRR in the first place, so it's not too surprising that the LIs and MC give a nod to the flagship series with a "once upon a time". If you're with Liam, it goes straight from "falling in love with the Prince" to what his relationship with her taught him, before the happily ever after. If you're with one of the other three LIs, it specifies that she came there for Liam but fell for someone else. Sounds a lot like Maxwell's book 😄 In Maxwell's playthrough, in fact, there is a reference to it when the MC calls him a "famous author".

•

(Screenshots organized as follows: 1 - Liam, 2 - Drake, 3 - Maxwell, 4 - Hana. Liam's and Hana's are my own. Drake's from @thefirstcourtesan, and Maxwell's from Kaitlyn Walker's YouTube channel).

The other interesting thing to note is that in Liam's playthrough, he leads the narration. While in everyone else's the MC is the one who steers it. One reason I can think of is that the narrative still treats this story as Liam's story as much as it is the MC's (if I'm right about the theme) - which...has honestly always been a sore point with the fanbase in TRR. That would depend on how us and our baby are now further involved with Cordonia in the story. Another factor for why she leads the narration...could be that essentially, the MC took initiative in the other three relationships, while in Liam's case it was he who took a more active role by proposing to her.

• The little story ends with this question from the MC:

Question: But what happens after Happily Ever After?

Answer: Mess. In Cordonia it's always mess.

• Cordonians (specifically the upper classes, since I don't know enough about the common populace to tell, since they're, yknow, practically invisible) are addicted to tea, apples and fucking shit up where they don't even need to.

• ANYWAY. What (literally) happens after 'happily ever after' is a tropical honeymoon on Liam's private island. In the case of the other three, he allows them access to the place and gives the staff instructions on making the stay comfortable for them.

• Now, since Liam owns the island and has probably visited it a could times, he shows more familiarity with it. He tells his wife that on previous trips the island had more rustic accommodations, but the villa they're now staying in was prepared recently. Additionally, the butler welcomes Hana, Maxwell and Drake as newcomers to the island, considering it's their first time. With Liam, there is an air of familiarity - he calls the butler by his name (Javier) and enquires about him and his wife (Mariana) - to show us perhaps how familiar he is with this holiday spot.

• Why the hell does everyone call Liam "Your Highness"? It's been two whole books since he became King, and the proper title for a monarch is "Your Majesty". How is it that Constantine gets to rake the MC over the coals for calling him Your Highness, yet Liam has to hear this from practically everyone. From Javier to freakin' Protocol-Monitor-Madeleine! The disrespect, I tell you!

• Okay so we're having a candlelit dinner by the ocean, and we get our first OOTD. Cute beach dress, has bright flowers and some crochet work on the bodice. I bought it because I couldn't bear to have Esther stay another minute in that Pepto Bismol of a dress.

• LOL @ all the LI responses to "this spot is right where the sharks are!"

• Tuna sashimi and pineapple aioli, huh? I have never had either so idek what that's supposed to taste like (someone on this writing team likes pineapples). I remember having to cut down on tuna during pregnancy, which meant no more Subway sandwiches since the tuna sub was the only one I liked at the time. IIRC most of my family were also cautioning me against pineapples and papaya during my first trimester!

• My gosh this butler doesn't waste much time jumping into assumptions huh?

• Also Javier, why is Cordonia's future so dependent on the well-being of my foetus even if I'm not ruling the country?

• Does Cordonia have sex ed? My money is on no. (esp in the Hana route).

• So there are two parts to the way the premise of wanting to have kids is built up in this sequence. In the first part, the LI impresses upon the MC the need to have children soon after the wedding. The second part addresses the urgency - the "why right now?" factor, and explores the LI's personal emotions towards having children. This bit also feels a bit like a follow-up to the Valtoria balcony scene in Chapter 15.

• The first part is pretty similar for Drake, Hana and Maxwell - all three of whom are now married to a Duchess and are aware that securing the duchy is important. They word it in their own distinctive styles, but the gist is pretty much the same. In Liam's case, since he is the king of the country, he speaks more about Cordonia and its tensions with neighbouring countries.

Take note of this because I'll be returning to this point later. (also who are the writers trying to convince about Cordonia's size. "Small kingdom" my ass).

• I'll be going by the LIs' personal reasons to have a baby now, one by one, along with a summary of their views on children in the Valtoria balcony scene last book (since this scene clearly references that diamond scene if you've bought it last book).

(Screenshots: Liam's and Hana's screenshots are mine, Drake's is from @thefirstcourtesan and Maxwell's is from Kaitlyn Walker's YouTube channel)

- Liam: Liam's love for family and need for children is well-known throughout the series. In Book 1, he's dropped hints about wanting to have a different kind of family dynamic from the one he'd experienced as a child, and in Book 2 there were multiple references to wanting to not be Constantine - both as a King and as a father. In the balcony scene in Book 3, Chapter 15, Liam tells us a number of things - about the value of having more heirs for succession, of him always dreaming of having at least 3 children, about Kenna, Cordonia's most legendary warrior queen which leads to an interesting factoid about how the rules of successions for both the throne and duchies are not gender-specific (he also cites Olivia and Penelope as being in line to inherit their duchies). In this sequence Liam undoubtedly has more to say about the political aspect of having an heir than the personal, but his statement about "someone missing" in their lives is of no surprise when he's been enthusiastic about kids for three books straight.

- Drake: Drake perhaps gets the lengthiest 'personal' bit of all, revolving around his eagerness to be a father and his own family history. This scene has Drake speaking of wanting a child with "your eyes and my hair", but most of all of Savannah and her little family, and wanting the happiness his sister is experiencing now. The writing often manages to tie Drake's thoughts about his future family with his past: in the Valtoria balcony scene, his memories of his father and his desire to bring up his own kids the way Jackson did are dominant in the conversation on children. He speaks at length about the absence of a proper 'home' so far in his life (stating that his room at the palace always felt like "a room in someone else's house") and how high on his priority list the prospect of having children is. The Valtoria scene shows him eager to have kids asap, and this scene builds up the same urgency. You're left in no doubt that he wants those kids now.

• Maxwell: Maxwell's route of this scene soundly pretty sudden, tbh. In his Valtoria scene, Maxwell expressed doubt and nervousness when it came to children, citing the example of Bartie ("I love palling around with little Bartie and everything, but if he bonks his head or something, I can just hand him back to Savannah. When it's your kid, you're the one people hand him to."). While this is referenced in TRH's dialogue when Maxwell jokes about forgetting diapers and baby socks - it's a pretty big jump from the man who didn't exactly feel ready to have children yet, and not enough work was done to justify that shift. This could be somewhat excused in the beginning of Book 3, when the narrative had just begun to treat him like an LI, but they've had an entire damn book and several months after to reflect on how to write him properly. That is...if they actually gave a damn.

- Hana: They don't even have the excuse of "relatively new LI" in Hana's case. Because she is the lone female LI married to a female MC, her scene should have been a lot more extensive and explored her urgency to have children so soon after their wedding, a whole lot more. There are tiny changes, like the one where she hints at the "logistical concerns" that come with two women considering a family, and where she speaks of giving her child the childhood she never had (which, frankly, is an extremely vague statement and could be applicable to more than one character in Cordonia). But there is urgency that, again, isn't properly explained in the scene. Even Hana's Valtoria scene doesn't have much that would explain why she would want a child barely weeks after her wedding. The Valtoria scene does have her outlining her dreams for the duchy (along with a joke about her enacting "Beauty and the Beast") and her happiness at the thought of being a mother (she maintains that out of the things expected of her, motherhood is the one she looked forward to). They could have spent some time thinking up a reason for why Hana would rush this, even before anything has happened, or outlined something personal and not ultra-generic. Both Maxwell and Hana deserved a lot better than this.

• Maxwell speaks about possibly forgetting diapers (PLS NO MAXWELL NO) and baby socks (um okay not as bad but depends on the climate), and one of the MC's dialogue options is to say..."diapers and socks are overrated". Guys your kid won't care how much fun you are when they have a bum rash.

• A-ha! Diamond scene. First-chapter diamond love scenes always come cheap in these series' (12 diamonds) and are usually quite a steal.

• ESTHER HAS NEW LINGERIE OMG I'M SO HAPPY I'D BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT FOR SO LOOOOONG 😭😭😭😭

• ...and it is also matches Liam's underwear. Maxwell's too 😅

• The scene is nice, there are variations between the ways the LIs work up their appetite before they finally roll in the...well, sand 😅 Maxwell has what they call an "ocean duel", Hana's fulfills her lifelong dream of carrying and spinning around her wife on a secluded beach, Drake chases the MC through the water...and Liam just enjoys being a huuuge tease, okay? 😂

• Oh God, why are they still using the old LoveHacks sexytimes music. That "DHUM-boom-ta-doom-DHUM" beat drives me nuts, and not in a good way. You have better music now, PB! Like the sexytimes tunes from RCD and PM. Use those!

• My gosh this entire group is quite horny for dominant duchesses, aren't they. Every last one of them. Each playthrough has these four gazing at the MC in wonder and telling her some variation of "I think you ordering me around is hot". Olivia could trample over them all with spiked heels and they would thank her!

• As always, when something suspicious happens, my dumbass MC goes ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ and never thinks about it again until shit actually goes down. This woman will never learn, will she.

• Anyway! We now move on to the rest of the honeymoon, summed up in three-four varying scenes per LI:

(Screenshots: Liam's and Hana's screenshots are mine, Drakes is HIMEME's YouTube channel, and Maxwell's is from Kaitlyn Walker's YouTube channel).

- Liam: Focused and dedicated. And insatiable as hell. Sex on a bed (SHOCKING!), sex after his wife points out what could be an apple constellation during stargazing (the MC effectively killed Liam's boner for Cordonia, I see), sex after having chocolate strawberries at a sunlit pond, sex again on a bed (Why is he getting four? 🤔). While the staff is still around somewhere on the island. This is a man with a mission.

- Maxwell: Fun and playful - kind of a "let's live wild and do daredevilry while we can!" vibe. In one Maxwell and the MC cliff dive into the ocean, debating over the wisdom of such risky adventuring when they may possibly be having a baby. In another, the MC watches, concerned, as Maxwell eats a raw squid appetizer. There is a nice callback to Maxwell's House sigil - the kraken - when he tells her that a squid would never hurt a fellow squid. The third shows them playing Strip Monopoly in the comfort of their bedroom.

- Hana: Adorable, caring and looking through every detail. Hana's three scenes involve her showing the MC the sights around the sunlit pond (which Hana and the MC lovingly call the "Hana Lee Honeymoon Itinerary"), watching the sunset under blankets, and this little scene of them choosing sperm donors for their baby:

It's a nice addition, but it still doesn't explain why they couldn't have waited a few more months. Nothing has happened yet in the timeline of the story, the women are (they believe) finally safe and happy, and while Javier seems to believe that babies born to a couple that consists of two women pop out of nowhere, I'm hoping the denizens of their duchy will have at least a little more common sense (this is Cordonia, so "hope" is the operative word).

- Drake: Langorous, relaxed and contented. Stargazing on the beach (I wonder whether this was a nod to the meteor shower scene in Book 1), whiskey on a patio/balcony/whatever in the afternoon, and eating roasted pork by the fire. Plenty of sex but also lots of outdoors, which means lots of the stuff Drake enjoys doing.

• Aaaaaand it's time for sexy scene 2! The couple are now relaxing in bed on the last day of their honeymoon, and the LI proposes a momento in the form of a sensual photoshoot (which comes with artwork of the LI in their underwear, posing for the MC) The male LIs pose with their hands at the back of their heads, smirking at the camera, while Hana strikes a coy pose, leaning against her hand. It's a quick, fun scene that's supposed to squeeze as much alone-time out of the couple as possible, because from here on the focus may shift to other things. Basically this chapter is meant to be one giant (but largely safe for readers) smutfest. I like the artwork - it's different and I guess meant to be a little more realistic than the usual full-page art in the books (like the engagement and wedding photos with your LIs last book), which is why I think it takes a little getting used to. I know it took me some time!

• Maxwell got an underwear upgrade too!

• We've now come to the end of our honeymoon, our bags packed and ready for our return to Cordonia. The chapter ends with us seeing a "familiar face", who could either be Liam (if you married someone else, and he doesn't show any expression) or an unspecified person (if you married Liam, and he looks ultra happy). Now that could either be related to some paparazzi-related stuff, if the flash of light was paparazzi-related, or it could be a fake-out and he's actually brought along the rest of the gang to surprise you. Idk and I don't want to speculate too much on this, mostly because something more interesting caught my eye.

• So that's it for my thoughts on the scenes themselves! On to the "general thoughts" section.

• General Thoughts and Potential Theories:

- As a first chapter for a new series that is still tied to an older one, it worked. It mirrors the light feel and sensibility of TRR's very first chapter, in that both chapters build an illusion of a fairytale-like place, with hints of the darkness within emerging the next chapter onwards (in this series though - since we're already familiar with Cordonia - the darkness is lightly hinted at this chapter itself). In a lot of ways I think we're going to see a lot of parallels between TRR and this new series.

- Unfortunately, one of those similarities also includes the imbalance in the writing for the LIs. Specifically with Maxwell and Hana. It's the most glaring in the dinner scene, which builds for us the premise on which this entire book stands (the topic of pregnancy). There are ways you could have them make the jump from nervous about having kids to excited, if you tried - there are elements in their storyline that could have helped us understand their urgency.

- I played Liam's route first, and was happy overall with it but I still have my misgivings. The good in terms of Liam's story is that he gets importance because the story is also about him and his country, where we are staying. He gives us some very important details in his route, and personally I like that his role as Guide To The Intricacies And Nuances of Cordonian Society still exists...but you can't deny that there were things in his storyline which should have been addressed and never were. I hope those are addressed this book. If they do the same this time around, it will only be to their detriment.

- Also, I find it highly ironic that Drake is the one to mention Savannah and Bartie when it was MAXWELL who was more involved in helping her with the child. Sure, he was - as he confessed in that Valtoria scene - more the "fun uncle" type, but he was still pretty heavily involved. Still keeping track of what Savannah needed and what Bartie would want. In his own final Book 3 scene, Maxwell is shown having an amazing rapport with little Bartie, playing peekaboo with his nose. I can barely count scenes involving Drake and Bartie with the fingers of one hand. Why couldn't Maxwell reference that last moment in Book 3, drawing up some inspirational moment from it? Like spending more and more time with Bartie changed the way he felt about kids? Or maybe that Savannah or Bertrand said something regarding the joy children bring to him. Anything that gives us some idea of when this shift happened.

Maxwell may have been new last book. It may have been a struggle to know what to do with him last book. But that isn't the case right now. By now they should have settled in their writing of him and figured out ways to make his story make sense? To give him more depth rather than simply reducing the man to the court jester? Maxwell's story was supposed to be about him growing, the scene in Valtoria was supposed to be about wanting to be a good father for his future children but fearing he might fail...yet the writers have the same man say the exact opposite. Maxwell's family history was thrown away for no good reason last book, and was replaced by Savannah drama. There was more space given to Savannah's love story with Bertrand (which didn't NEED the entire book to gain fruition) and Drake (optionally) enjoying humiliating Bertrand. That time, energy and effort could have gone in building up Maxwell, getting an insight into what happened to the Beaumonts that they became so poor...but no. The only Beaumont that mattered seems to be Savannah (and we know exactly why). And going by the fact that they're going to force an entire wedding storyline involving Bertrand and Savannah down our throats, that still seems to be the case.

- Hana's is even more worrying considering that it was poles apart from the rest of the playthroughs and therefore SHOULD have had more thought. Yes Hana loves the idea of being a mother. Yes Hana loves children and has a nurturing nature. But the urgency is still the same as the others' in her playthrough, and it made absolutely no sense. There was a clear dissonance between their current situation and the rush these two were in.

Hana's deserved at least some more time in her dinner scene. Maybe one where she could speak about growing up an only child, with no companions and not even toys. She could explain the loneliness involved in having a small family with parents who gave her more duties than affection, and then speak about giving her kid a better childhood. There isn't even any discussion about which of them should be the person carrying (we know it will be the MC, but why it has to be her in their case is anyone's guess).

What the team have done here is give Hana the bare minimum, after an entire two books of giving her even less than that. I know I'll probably be judged for thinking negatively rather than being cautiously optimistic, but the fact is that the moment this team feels they can get away with tossing scraps or less than that, they can and will do it. It's not stopped them before: not from botching up Hana's storyline, not from giving Hana fans a reception full of goof-ups and shoddy writing, not from pairing her with her bully. Perhaps last year I would have been happy and grateful to see Hana and the MC calling each other "my wife". This time...I refuse to settle for just mere scraps. If you can give thought and care to Liam and Drake's storylines, you'd better be able to do the same for Hana and Maxwell, otherwise what's the point of reviving this book? What's the point of using Hana specifically in two of your ads as bait for your lesbian/bi/wlw fans?? Might as well let the entire series rot in the trash where it belongs in that case.

- I've heard theories about our child becoming heir to the throne, thanks to a possible future arc that may make Liam unable to have children. I personally hate this possible plot line for two reasons:

1. As it is the MC gets more importance than she deserves, whether or not she actually puts in the work. She becomes a front-runner during the social season even if she fails. She becomes a Duchess even if she lacks even the most basic skills, while Hana who has done way more than she ever had for the country gets nothing, not even a needle-point's worth of land. She becomes Champion of the Realm even if she is literal garbage throughout that book, when that title could have easily gone to Olivia or Hana instead if she didn't earn enough to get it. And now to have her kid be made an heir to the throne? For no good reason? Get outta here.

2. Forcing Liam into yet another storyline that is tragic and painful (and I'm pretty sure the writers will find yet another excuse to write a thesis on Drake Walker in the time they could be using to let Liam actually break down, or vent. If they couldn't be bothered to explore the man's feelings when his own father died, do you really think they will bother with him in this??) on top of whatever else he's had to experience so far? At this point I can do with less of that. I'm honestly sick of storylines that put Liam in very uncomfortable, painful situations with very little space for him to air out his grief. Give the man a fucking break. Let him have some breathing space to rule his goddamned kingdom, get him a fantastic therapist and get him better friends while he's at it. Pushing him into yet another messed-up situation when you've barely even scratched the surface with what his experiences have done to him, is really just drama for the sake of drama, nothing else.

- Nonetheless, since this is about a pregnancy and a future heir, I believe there will be plenty talk about succession, and about the importance given to fertility and children in Cordonian society. But as with the social season in Book 1, the engagement tour in Book 2, and the wedding + Unity Tour in Book 3, I believe the pregnancy itself is a frame story. The kind of story that justifies the glitz, the glitter, and the glamorous events...that can serve as a temporary gloss to cover the conflicts within. All while the inner stories reveals those conflicts, layer by layer (again, if it's done right. Book 3 is a good example of a great premise ruined by bad writing. I sincerely hope this book does not go in that direction).

- Remember those screenshots I put up in that dinner scene from Liam's route? About Cordonia's tensions with its neighbouring countries, and how the country may be viewed as vulnerable? I think that's where the actual theme of the story lies.

Books 1 and 2 mostly revolved around the illusion of Cordonia - the fairytale kingdom - before the MC herself is confronted with the tensions brewing within. Book 3 was about strengthening Cordonia through resolution of internal conflict. It was about learning about the intricacies of the country, its most powerful duchies, their histories and identities, Cordonia's messy, complicated history - to tackle the problems that lay within.

I feel like Book 4 would be taking a natural progression from resolving internal conflict to finally standing united as a nation against outside forces. Constantine - in his conversation with the MC in Shanghai - hints not only at groups within Cordonia that wanted to destroy the monarchy, but also foreign powers ("suffice to say there are those who envy Cordonia's prosperity...". Not the royal family's - but "Cordonia's").

Keeping a united front and showcasing strength through pride in the country - ergo 'patriotism', or perhaps 'national integration' since Cordonia is home to many different cultures and geographical locations (I originally wrote 'nationalism here, but now realize there may be negative connotations attached to that word in today's times: thanks @musicallisto!) is often viewed as an asset against alien forces. The MC is now a part of the monarchy/nobility, and will be irrevocably tied to the country's future - so it makes sense that she will now dig into the deepest and most intimate parts of Cordonia's history, and go several steps further in helping to unite the nation.

- Why do I theorize 'patriotism' or 'national integration' as being a theme? There are several reasons for this:

The Unresolved Storylines: We still have a ways to go in understanding Cordonian history. We don't know which other forces were involved in previous assassinations, and we don't have a clue what happened to Liam's mother. All we do know is that other people and groups that we have probably not even seen yet, may have been involved. Francesco (who also knew Liam's mother) and Xinghai, the only foreign delegates/visitors that we got to network with in Book 2, have minimal roles so far but SEEM to have had some influence when they were introduced earlier. Francesco particularly could have some sort of role to play, given what we were told about him in Book 2. Now would be a good time to explore why he needed contacts with these people (other than the fact that Xinghai is Hana's dad). It's possible that nothing will happen and we may not even see these two, or exchange any important information, but I'd still hope that there is some importance to their appearances in Book 2.

The Connections We Made In The Engagement Tour: Meeting Francesco in Capri was related to getting access to EU markets for Cordonian products. The engagement tour itself revolved around grabbing international attention towards Cordonian problems - one of which was the tsunami that hit Portavira, which we learn more about in Book 3. There is a possibility that these threads may be picked up in the future.

Both the above points hint at possible threats, or allies. At this point we can't exactly determine who is friend and who is foe, but it is clear that neighbouring countries - and indeed countries we have associated with in the past - will play a pretty big role in the way we view Cordonia, and in the way we direct the narrative of this country.

The Artwork: I love this part of my theory because it is the most based on actual evidence rather than guesswork. The idea of a nation depends as much on items of familiarity and symbols, as it does on history. It's why countries have national animals, anthems, fruits. Why art depicting national and local legends can often be considered almost sacred. The book has barely even begun yet, and already it is FILLED with all kinds of things symbolic to Cordonia.

Let's first take a peek at the cover art:

Now let's ignore Liam's and Drake's (busted) faces in this cover and focus on what the three are holding.

The MC holds a rattle in her hand, and the jewel within the rattle looks similar to a ruby, which has been associated more than once with apples in the story (Cordonia's most valued variety of apple is the Cordonian Ruby, Liam's wedding gift to the MC is a ruby in the shape of an apple. The same rattle shows up in the second cover [on the left] as well. It's a stretch, I know, but I've got better evidence. Stick with me).

Liam holds a onesie with a crown design on the front - and we know that "for crown and country" is a popular phrase, especially for toasts, in Cordonia. Drake holds out a toy lion: the lion is the national animal, and holds a place of pride in the national Coat-of-Arms. The throne on which the MC herself sits, is blue and gold - both considered national colours. That's at least 4 symbols related to Cordonia vying for our attention on the same cover!

I mean, even Book 3 had just two major symbols - the apple (related to Cordonia) and the phoenix gown (related to Valtoria) - featuring on its cover.

The biggest proof to me, however, is not the cover, but the loading page. To be more precise - what is written above that loading page. A number of Choices books (BB, for instance) write little factoids about the world they are building above the loading bar, which players can read while they're waiting for the chapter to load. This wasn't a common practice with TRR, but they've definitely started it now! Some of the commentary is usual stuff - about gaining advantages through outfits, welcoming you back to Cordonia, etc...but THIS TIME there are tidbits of information given to us as well. And 80% of those involve apples!

Here are a few I managed to catch. One fact on the importance of apples in Cordonian culture, two specifically on the Cordonian Ruby itself including a rare recipe, and two old proverbs (this isn't the only time we've heard apple-related proverbs in the books - in Book 3 for instance, Bertrand refers to their trip to Fydelia as 'slicing two apples with one knife'). Proverbs in general often give us an idea of what people within a region hold up as important, as so connected to their life experiences that they can use those familiar objects as motifs for things that they see in daily life (eg. proverbs in my home state, Kerala, often refer to things/animals we find locally: jasmines, coconuts, jackfruit, dogs, elephants).

The fact that the apple features so often and with such emphasis in the loading page itself - and we have already seen what this simple fruit means to Cordonia - indicates to me that this national symbol - and the idea of the nation itself - will be of great importance. Not only will we be exploring foreign relations, IMO, but we'll also be learning how to build a national narrative that will benefit and strengthen Cordonia.

What's also interesting is that the apple symbolizes fertility to the Cordonian people as well - the apple cutting ceremony during a wedding (as explained by Regina to Leo's fiancée in RoE) is "a symbol of the fruit the tree will bear - you being the tree, of course", and there are chances that the fruit may feature often within the context of pregnancy/having children as well.

• That's all for now, guys. I hope to write more and theorize more as the chapters progress! Until then, I hope you enjoy this one, and I'd love to hear what you have to say.

• I did the Hana screenshots for this chapter, since the first chapter allows me to play repeatedly within losing keys, but I won't be able to do so from Chapter 2 onwards. If there are any Hana fans out there who keep screenshots of scenes in their route and are interested in sharing, I'd love to hear from you and will definitely credit you for the screenshots I put up!

• If you'd like to be tagged in future QTs, please let me know! Tagging @nikkisha16 for now since she asked xD

• Until Saturday, folks!

#long post #trh quick thoughts #the royal heir #trh qts #king liam #liam x mc #hana lee #hana x mc #maxwell beaumont #maxwell x mc #drake walker #drake x mc

221 notes · View notes

viktcrr-alt · 5 years ago

Text

MAXENCE DANET FAUVAL / NONBINARY — don’t look now, but is that viktor samuels i see? the 24 year old visual arts student is in their senior year and he/they are a rochester alum. i hear they can be observant, ingenious, reticent and dependent, so maybe keep that in mind. i bet he/they will make a name for themselves living in garcia row. ( james. 20. est. she/they. )

LAST INTRO WOOOO !! u know what to mf DO !!

TW DEATH, HEAVY GRIEF, OVERDOSE / DRUG ADDICTION, HOSPITALIZATION, HYPERSEXUALITY, RELIGION MENTIONS, MENTAL ILLNESS

a e s t h e t i c s

old tvs and their static, worn tapes, horror movie screams, spilled ink, a sculptor’s hands, clay-stained, chicken scratch handwriting, messy notes, messy hair, scoffs and eye-rolls, bruised knuckles, sore throats, funeral homes and a crying preacher, shattered ceramics, knife fights, high ledges, vertically-striped pants, red lights, the moon shrouded in clouds, cigarette butts.

general info !!

full name: viktor phillip samuels

nickname(s): icky vicky :/

b.o.d. - jan 2nd

label(s): the black hole, the crepehanger, the impious, the opaque, the tempest, etc.

height: 6′0″

hometown: rochester, new york

sexuality: uuuhhh god … probably pan tbh

stats

biography !!

okay so … born and raised in rochester, new york to the well known samuels family. preacher father, a mother, a twin sister born 15 minutes before him - aka tatiana samuels, who died back in january.

kinda … grew up as a really awkward, quiet kid? like … just didn’t really interact with other kids super well, preferred being alone and like … digging up bugs in the dirt. only friend was like … his own sister.

grew out of this as they got older, instead sort of … becoming a bit of a dick? to compensate for years of awkwardness? will bite the hand that feeds him. was a full on nuisance by middle school. tatiana was not, at least, noticeably.

has always been a fan of darker materials, y’know - grim and creepy, morbid shit. big fan of tim burton ever since he was a kid, which isn’t … a good look for a preacher’s son, but he’s never really felt ~in~ with the rest of his family, anyway.

drew disturbing pictures as a kid probably tbh that prompted one or two or five phone calls home 2 assure everything was fine.

has always been really … good at art, in general - from drawing to painting to playing with clay, that’s always been viktor’s Thing.

aNyWaYs. being tatiana’s twin brother was kinda hard sometimes. tatiana and him were near opposites besides their same mean-spirited trait. she was better in the public than he was, but viktor was arguably more talented than tatiana. they both loved each other deeply and found each other as competition for their parents’ attention - a rivalry, of sorts.

high school is when viktor really started to act out - started extreme, like losing his virginity in their church and vandalism around the neighborhoods. faked being possessed in the middle of sunday service. almost had an exorcism performed on him, probably.

the only redeemable trait was like … his sheer talent with art. was in a 3d art AP course, specialized in sculpting - could pretty much create anything he wanted with enough dedication.

because his parents would be focused on disciplining him for his antics, tatiana could sneak away and get away with stuff easier. so like, y’know, that’s on the bright-side of things.

never been particularly motivated to do much - wasn’t planning on attending lockwood but his parents kinda … did and sent in his application for him b/c they were Not on board with him Wasting Away (wanted him out of the house asap)

actually pretty smart !! just doesn’t like … want to apply himself ever. double majoring in english and visual arts because they’re like … two of his only interests :/ plus he wants to write and illustrate his own series of children books with a style similar to tim burton’s

he’d been experimenting since high school but college is where he really started to like … crack down on himself and figure himself out. was out as pan & nonbinary by his sophomore year of college, just … not to his family, necessarily. thinks tatiana always knew, but didn’t … really use it against him, blessedly enough

always felt like the whole twin - connection thing was … both wack and also not-wack? sometimes it felt believable but sometimes he had no idea what was going on in tatiana’s head. but he felt oddly transparent to her, always - like he was predictable to no one but her.

( TW DEATH, GRIEF, OVERDOSE / HOSPITALIZATION BEYOND THIS POINT )

but when tatiana disappeared - it was like, like viktor knew. the moment she had been kidnapped - felt something deeply wrong in his gut. and when tatiana died - viktor felt something cut so severely in him. he knew, he always knew exactly when. he couldn’t put his finger on how - but he knew. even when everybody else held out hope for her to be found - he knew.

went on a bender around the same time, had always struggled w/ drug addiction but it got worse the longer tatiana went without being found.

( also struggled heavily with his mental health, too ?? has manic and depressive episodes. will fixate on a sculpting project for six months and then purposely knock it off the table and destroy it in the matter of seconds once it’s finished for. no fucking reason. impulse spends A Lot. )

when her body was found, viktor went off the rails. ended up overdosing and being hospitalized where he spent the next like … however long months … until they deemed him better.

has been back since the beginning of fall semester in an attempt to finish his senior year - mostly out of his parents’ insistence that he did, because he very much did not want to.

is still dealing with a lot of trauma & grief, which was only amplified with dean lockwood’s death - causing him to spiral and be unpredictable with his mental health. some days are good, and some days are very bad.

personality !!

the human embodiment of a gremlin, fed after midnight. a goblin, if u will. one of those cats with a narrow head and big ass ears. that’s him.

b i g horror & halloween enthusiast. loves the old campy horror movies. probably has an abundance of masks from different movies. dresses like a grimy millennial beetlejuice more than he should. love those vertically striped pants!

fashion alternates between e-boy (would b tik tok famous if he were like … 17), millennial beetlejuice, and like … goth in a crop top and sweatpants. big fan of crop tops. big fan of sweatpants.

he can be fucking mean. petty, aggressive, instigator. will literally spit in ur face or no reason. kind of person who’ll stick his gum into other ppl’s hair. other than that he’s like … pretty okay. he’s not always mean, he’s just a dick like … 70% of the time lmao

i mean yeah okay he’ll call someone a stinky bitch for no reason except He Feels Like It And Believes It. it’s fine he’s fine, we’re fine.

despite the fact tht he’s probably getting into fights whenever - considers himself 2 be a lover n not a fighter but that’s just because he Fucks a lot. kind of uses it like a coping mechanism, like he’s this big fancy carnival show that’s like ‘come one, come all! fuck the dead girl’s twin brother!’ may have a problem w/ hypersexuality but it’s nothing he’s fully. aware of.

the preacher’s whore son, basically

like i said he’s pan & nb, switches between he and they pronouns but like … he has such a fragile grip on his identity that u could call him ‘dog-faced bitch’ and he’d turn like hey wassup :)

vastly impulsive, like i’ve mentioned … destroys his own creations 4 the fun of it, spends all his money on useless shit, will cheat on someone bc he feels like it. screams into the night sky frequently, like a cat in heat.

i mean he also creates useless shit for no reason too. spent six months sculpting a hollowed out tree the size of him and then took a sledgehammer to it.

dramatic fuck. used to play the organ at the church like … when no one was looking after him and service was about to start. just these creepy as melodies. would do the same thing at home on his keyboard w/ the organ setting whenever he got grounded until his parents took away his keyboard sadjfkg

won’t talk about his time away b/c it’s not rly anybody’s business but ofc nothing is sacred to the watershed app, y’know, nothing’s private.

still like - he absolutely refuses to talk about tatiana’s death and like, his mental health or his addiction (he’s fallen back into it tbh but it hasn’t gotten bad again … yet) or like … anything involving his own emotions

will literally just change the topic! abruptly, no warning, asks about the jonas brothers instead.

that being said he’s obsessed with tatiana’s death. tatiana was very much a rock for him, kinda dependent on her in a way? just … being there, y’know, kept him grounded.

so he obv became a shepherd bc he wants to know Everything there is abt the app, wants to be deep inside it, wanted to know Who Exactly Killed Tatiana and like … not saying he wants 2 commit murder but :/ yknow. he’s very upset.

emotionally unavailable while also like crying twice a day.

will tell you straight up what he wants from you, no bullshit, no beating around the bush - just blunt. if he wants to just fuck, nothing else, then that’s that. if he feels deviation he’ll ghost in like. less than a second. kinda awful like that! feels no shame.

but like … also is emotional ?? as shit ?? it’s confusing. he’ll cry on a whim and then flip u off if u try to console him or like. ask him anything. will bite you.

he goes to therapy but he generally fucks around and wastes most of the time until the therapist threatens to like … idk what therapists r allowed to threaten. to send him off to another therapist? idk.

likes being intimidating but like … not with his body or nothing ‘cos he’s a TWIG, but like … uses his love for horror n creepy shit to his advantage. has an abundance of fake blood. has channeled the energy of jack nicholson and used it on tatiana’s boyfriends before.

( also a big fan of sfx makeup, has dabbled in it)

probably chases kids with a chainsaw (w/o the like … chain … or w/e … so it’s not actually Dangerous) around halloween

he’s generally never doing good, both mental health wise and morally.

would probably steal candy from a baby for the fun of it.

i don’t know if there’s a good to him, deep down, and i don’t know if he sees any issues with himself either !! nothing really breaks through to him anymore, the only person who ever really made him stop and Think about his actions was tatiana.

kinda introverted, recluse type who doesn’t rly like most people or going out, but he’ll go to parties if it means he’ll be high as shit.

pretty observant. likes to analyze people even though he’s probably not … fully right.

wanted connections !!

he lives alone currently but like … ex - roommates where viktor was just. a nightmare to live with.

feel like a lot of enemies is also a possibility !! viktor’s messy.

people that like … knew tatiana. dated tatiana, even, and viktor would pretty much try to intimidate / scare them at any given chance :/

close friends of tatiana too

people who hated tatiana but liked viktor. people who hated viktor but liked tatiana

people who take pity on him and he Hates it viciously and vocally.

a band of hooligan gremlin kids who do drugs and fuck shit up around town like they’re edgy teenagers even though they’re all early to mid 20s.

the girl he lost his virginity 2 in high school lmao … a distant memory

fellow rochester locals, from church or school or whatever

exes from the past !! good terms and bad terms, but i love bad terms a whole lot mainly b/c viktor’s a jackass.

don’t know if he’s soft towards anybody but we can try. we can Try.

friends, old friends, new friends, bad friends, good friends, close friends, frenemies, etc. etc. all of it

hookups !! so many hookups. fwbs, one night stands, whatever.

uuhhhh god. i don’t know. im so sleepy rn. people in the same major or similar majors.

maybe a ride or die.

people he’s a bad influence on / an enabler towards / all around toxic for them / each other.

people he’s fought !! people who’ve seen him get into random fights and were like ‘uh wtf’

fellow shepherds !!

literally anything im not picky.

#huntingtonintro #death tw #grief tw #overdose tw #drugs tw #addiction tw #hospitalization tw #hypersexuality tw #murder tw #religion mentions #mental health tw

8 notes · View notes