#trust me it will change your life

[stuckasmain]

With the binge of old Sci fi and monster movies I’ve been going on lately, honestly I think everyone should be legally required to watch at least one black and white film in their life.

[petricorah]

scenes i loved from Real Enough to Get Me Through by @marriedzukka <333 [ids in alt]

[aipurjopa]

“Because I can’t handle being alone again”

[lgbtlunaverse]

So I've said multipe times now (here and here) that thinking nmj is just so blinded by privilege he doesn't undertand that acting out of line gets people killed is, in my opinion, a misunderstanding of his character that ignores the part where he's, you know, actively dying the whole time and thinks that's a good thing. But that doesn't mean I don't think privilege plays no role at all in how he views the world.

Specifically, his view that death (at least premature or violent death) means something.

Death isn't always a tragedy to NMJ, but it is always meaningful. If you kill an evil dangerous person for your righteous cause, that death had meaning. There was evil in the world and now there is less of it. Similarly, if you die in the pursuit of your righteous cause, that death has meaning, because the sheer dedication you gave to it that you were willing to die for it will further that cause, and your bretheren will be invigorated by your sacrifice to fight even harder.

If a death isn't meaningful, that's an injustice and it is up to the living to give it meaning. That's what cuts so deep about his father's murder. There were no consequences, no changes, no meaning. Wen Ruohan was just going to get away with it! He fights and wins an entire war to make it mean something, to make it so that the unjust murder of Nie Mingjue's father is part of Wen Ruohan's downfall.

But this is a view he can only hold because he's the kind of person who's death will be meaningful. Most ordinary people's deaths are meaningless. Not ontologically, not inherently, but they are made meaningless because no one cares. For death to be meaningful you either have to be so powerful that anything you risk your life for will be impacted in some way. (Like, say, if you sacrifice a long life for immense martial power in a faustian bargain with a blade) Or if people with that kind of power care enough about you to do so for you. For most people, this isn't true. A starving street kid has no power to change the unfair world that put them there, even if they risk their life trying, and no one will do it for them once they die.

Nie Mingjue knows this in abstract, and of course rightfully believes it's wrong. But all that does is make it yet another righteous cause people should be willing to die for. Everyone's deaths should mean something, we'll make it so or die trying!

This is what the conflict between nieyao is about at its core. Because Jin Guangyao, fundamentally, cannot conceive of his own death as meaningful. Nie Mingjue grew up around powerful men who could change the world but refuse to do so because god forbid they risk a single hair on their perfect heads. Meng Yao, on the other hand, grew up in an environment where no one of importance would blink twice if you died. He was surrounded by meaningless death. Indeed his entire early life is defined by that lack of care.

Meng Shi dies and no one cares. Meng Yao gets thrown off a flight off stairs and no one cares. He has to be the one to do the caring, and once he's gone no one else will do it for him.

So he has to live.

Jin Guangyao eventually gets far enough that he actually does aquire the power to change some things... as long as he's alive. If he changes too much, holds on too tightly to his ideals, he'll die and it'll all be for nothing. He can't sacrifice himself for his goals because doing so would immediately render those goals unobtainable. No one will care about what he tried to do. He won't be a heroic sacrifice, he'll just be trash that finally cleaned itself up.

And well... Nie Mingjue dies, and someone makes it mean something. Makes it mean so much that the entire story of mdzs would not exist without it. Jin Guangyao dies and it doesn't mean anything. Most people are glad to be rid of him, and the few that are not don't do anything to change that.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Smell Check [Easy: Failure]

MDZS Disco Elysium AU part 1 (part 2 - part 3)

[crookedfivefingers]

3.13 | ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴀꜱᴛ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ʟᴏʀᴅꜱ

link to the post I accidentally wound up prattling endlessly about in the tags 💀

[phantomrose96]

i just caught up with a breach of trust and I don't even know WHAT to say. thank you? jesus christ? oh my god? my husband and friends all hate me bc I won't shut up about it? I've never read a fanfic that could hold a candle? a match even? I've been reading in all my spare time. I've had dreams bc it's the last thing I'm thinking about at night. then I read more over breakfast. WOW? wowowowow? thank you again?

(A Breach of Trust)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Thank you for being as brain-rotted as I am over this Utter Behemoth of a fic!! It's woven into the fabric of my being at this point.

I've poured my heart and soul into it and it means so so much to me, so hearing that OTHER people are like, bothering the people in their OWN lives about it? Wow. I'm very happy over the notion that there are strangers who know vaguely of ABoT because their loved one wanted to tell them all about it.

I've really loved building it up from an empty Word document. I'm really happy and lucky other people have come along for that. Thank you!!

[chemtrailactivist]

as somebody who has delt with living in a horders house, drug addicted parents, and financial problems seeing lily treat mikaila’s problems as at worst an inconvenience for her and at best something lily can just bring up to get sympathy points for herself is just sad.

[raindropren]

Shinyduo doodle/sketch comp :3 (there's like,,, 8 of em?)

soup! pearlo's holdin the soup, what they talkkinn boutt? idk.

I just thought this doodle of s10 gem was funny. why she smirking?

I just wanted to draw them being silly and happy!! :D

I didn't actually look at their s10 skins/outfits for this so I was making stuff up at some point, anyways, Pickles!

I didn't actually watch the amongus stream,,, but I think it's silly,,

wanted to draw a closer interaction pose for the two! if I'm gonna be obsessed with drawing a duo together, I'm gonna try to get some improvement out of it! either way, gossip?

Head bop? head boop? head bump? i think it might be head bump but I don't like saying it outloud? weird,, either way!! Inspired by something I've seen a couple pets(cats or dogs normally) do where they just bump their tiny head into their human's forehead, it's cute :]

I have no clue what this song is but it is stuck in my head!!!!!! I probably heard it on an insta reel and now it's stuck in there. She's my bestfriend, best of all best friends!(do you want a best friend too?) ba bow bow,,

These were all done in the last, like couple days to a week? idk. but ya! I have like three pages of kinda bad shinyduo sketches now lol, anyways! Them!! :D

[puppppppppy]

man

[i-only-do-the-finnimum]

I just loved this fanfic sooooo much. Pliis read it! You can even read it if you don't know anything about the Harry Potter books/movies. It's set in an alternate universe. And it fucking broke meeeee. I'll be rereading it soon for sure.

If you have fanfic recs pliiis let me know!!! AND IF YOU'VE READ THIS FANFIC PLIIS TALK TO ME ABOUT IT.

[bitchfitch]

wait this is myyyy third? betta that was just given to me bc it sucks and is ugly. As an adult, I've never paid money for a betta fish. Tbf I didn't pay for the ones my parents kept when I was like 4-5 but those were still formative creatures in my life and I assume they were paid for.

[zekkopunks]

I’ve gotten so many “I don’t know earthbound/mother but ___” tags lately and all I have to say is

play it please please please pleas

[sysig]

You could stay forever, if you wanted (Patreon)

[marimbles]

the agony of enjoying MULTIPLE THINGS AT ONCE. How do people do it….

[sluttish-armchair]

Ok but thinking back to how I was in elementary and middle school: I had such disdain for other kids who broke the rules, that I irrationally hated a whole bunch of kids — kids I would have made good friends with — all because I couldn’t stand the fact that they engaged in conflicts with, and affronts to authority figures or standards.

It even went as far as internally mocking a kid my age — calling him “Mama’s Boy” in my head — over the fact that his mother whispered comments into his ear, which he mumbled unintelligibly into the mic, and then would fall asleep as if dead on her arm. I perceived his inability to give comments on his own, and his sleeping, as moral failings of both mother and child; because I wasn’t raised like that. And maybe, those feelings also came from jealousy. I was expected to fight off sleep all the time because I could read at a college level in third grade, and could theoretically understand the material presented at the meetings despite it still being inappropriate for my age group.

I was so far deep into the “bad associations spoil useful habits” mindset that it made me hate my fellow neurodivergents — kids I would have been friends with — who maybe couldn’t hide it as well as I could. That is beyond fucked up. Now, I work with those very kids I disliked so much as a child, and guess what? They are my absolute favorite people to be around; and many of them remind me of myself.