#truly rambles

[foldingfittedsheets]

Back in 2017 I signed up for one of the Cards Against Humanity sillies and did their Cards Against Humanity Saves America. Basically they were like fuck Tr*mp and his border wall and used the funds from the campaign to buy land and to make all 150,000 contributors part owners of said land across the US/Mexico border.

It was fun and silly and I got a little certificate.

Today I got an email that Elon Musk illegally annexed that land for SpaceX and that CAH are suing him over it. So possibly I’ll get like $100 if they manage to win a lawsuit and stick it to Musk. It’s like even more bang for my original buck.

[mediocre-megs]

honestly more media should portray the anti aging industry as horrific and decidedly unhuman. it IS body horror it IS grotesque it DOES go against nature*. it WILL kill you. yes.

*this is NOT anti-hrt or anti-vax or anything of the sort. i love criticisms of the anti aging industry + sci-fi/horror. i also love trans people and vaccines and medicine and science. i also don’t care if you personally have botox. this was a shitpost i made while high and 2/3 of the way through the substance (2024). terfs dni. cheers.

[lurkinginnernarrator]

Shen twins or bros au where the Shens go through Qiu Manor and Wu Yanzi together but only Shen Jiu joins Cang Qiong with Yue Qingyuan. Cut to Cang Qiong facing a problem that needs the expertise of a demonic cultivator and Shen Jiu presents the most powerful and elusive demonic cultivator as his brother

...how is it that the demonic cultivator brother is nicer than the one dressed in pastels

[owlbelly]

so. i understand where the sentiment "listening to an audiobook is the same thing as reading the book" is coming from - i mean, yes, the bottom line is you are taking in the same words in what is possibly a more accessible (or maybe just more enjoyable) format for you! and i'm 100% in agreement that "book snobs" who say "no you didn't really read it" if you listened to the audiobook are full of shit. ofc you should engage with stories in whatever way works for you, there is no moral or intellectual superiority to reading words off a page vs. listening to them

but it also is different? an audiobook is a performance. choices a narrator makes about line readings can drastically influence the meaning of the lines. even just different voices, accents, etc. - there are creative choices being made by the person delivering the words to you, and that affects your experience of the story in a different way than if you were making those choices in your own head. it might even change the way you visualize what's going on!

this isn't a bad thing it's just An Actual Thing & i think it's worth talking about. it rubs me the wrong way when people act like accommodations (and for many people audiobooks are an accommodation) always result in a completely identical experience, or even that they should, & if you suggest that people accessing media in different ways are having different experiences it's somehow ableist

anyway on rare occasions i really enjoy audiobooks but mostly they are much less accessible to me than words on a page (i need to be able to reread, flip back and forth, go at my own pace) & i also just really strongly prefer to encounter a text on my own before hearing someone else's performance of it, if possible! again i don't think it's "better" to read a physical book i just think it is a Distinct form of experiencing a story & acting like the two things are entirely the same is sort of doing a disservice to both

[flimsy-roost]

Reminiscing with my partner about high school, and we both have a lot of memories of a specific Spanish teacher we both had (she was the only Spanish teacher) who caused us to both stop taking high school Spanish as soon as we possibly could.

I want to clarify up top that this woman was not a bad teacher per se, we both learned Spanish effectively from her. She also wasn't a bad or mean person per se, I think if she was my aunt or a friend's mom I would like her just fine. Instead, she was extremely hit-or-miss with fostering good student-teacher relationships, and she whiffed hard with a lot of us.

She would often take weeks to grade exams and assignments, which isn't the end of the world, but she wasn't nice about it. Her most common refrain, to a classroom of overworked and overtired college prep students, was "sorry I didn't get to those yet, I was too busy having a life." The concept of giving us less gradable work, which could have made both her and our lives easier, did not seem to occur to her. She seemed almost kind of smug about the power imbalance, if that makes any sense.

My partner got to tap out when the classes were still large, lucky me got to advance to her much smaller Spanish 4 class in my Junior year, where things only got sillier.

Day 1, she tells us that she will not be handing out grades in class anymore. Instead, she wanted us to come to her office hours so we could learn how we did and discuss what we could do better next time. For every. single. assignment. I opted to just go the year never knowing how I was doing. I ended up with a B+.

We're doing an oral presentation on a movie of our choice in Spanish. Great! Fun! We need to show movie clips to support our analysis. In this awkward period during the decline of physical media support but before (legal) widespread online media availability, how are we supposed to get those clips? idk kids you figure it out. I got an uncloseable sex bot popup in the middle of my presentation while showing a grainy clip from Anastasia on a sketchy website.

Right before a mid-semester vacation (either thanksgiving or spring break, I can't remember), she assigned us a partner presentation on a topic I don't even remember. Neither me nor my project partner were keen on oral presentations, and were both too busy with our own shit to practice. We did do all the work and research, but made a half-assed written outline for the presentation itself. Presentations were divided across two days (which likely worked in our favor), with a volunteer order (ie, "who wants to go next?"). We both kept delaying and delaying because neither of us wanted to do it. At the end of the second day, she asked if anyone else needed to present. My partner and I make direct eye contact across the room. Neither of us say anything. We're dismissed, go on our merry vacationing way. My partner tells me we got a B+ for a project we never presented or turned in any evidence of. B+ seems to have been kind of her thing. Ted, you're a real one, excellent teamwork, I'd give us an A+ for cooperation.

Senior year I took two science classes so my parents wouldn't make me take Spanish 5, which I probably would have really loved taking from somebody not her.

[queerofthedagger]

the thing is that tolkien was right trees really are that great

[somnimagus]

My page for @sheikahzine; about Impaz's duty to her village, empty of people and full of memories.

[id in alt text]

[orionshounds]

he cares so much about them, but he has never known how to show it

and now, it’s too late.

[crazymecjc]

look at yourself… you’re the true puppet.

[candycatfalls]

Insane how ford said to bill "if I'm still alive you must want something from me" when he woke up in the penthouse, as if bill hadnt been keeping him alive and carting him around as his little gold trophy wife for 3 days

[melonsharks]

MORE TRANSFEM DIPPER!!! SHE IS MY LIFEBLOOD 😭😭😭😭😭

(ur art style is so nice btw)

dipper pines and the art of repression

notes below the cut for funsies haha.

its kind of interesting to me to watch gravity falls with the lens of transfem dipper because when you watch it like that, its like. shes trying SO hard to push it down. it kind of reads like shes trying to convince not just everybody else, but HERSELF that shes a boy. like the idea that anybody could even think shes a girl is terrifying to her (this kid really does read as trans in any direction LMFAO i love dipper) but like. why transfem? right… full hc territory here, please be nice to me.

-she doesn’t like her deadname (its traditionally a masculine name, as far as i know 😭) so she goes by the nickname that as given to her because of her birthmark…

-she gets made fun of OFTEN for not being manly enough even throughout the show and so she associates femininity with Bad Thing To Be. so she CANT be a girl because being a girl would be a BAD THING FOR HER TO BE. shes 12 years old yk so like. this deep, deeeep repression sets in.

and so:

-she overcompensates. shes not just going to be manly, but shes going to be SO manly that nobody is going to make fun of her for it again. sometimes to the point where she feels like she cant even really be herself.

i feel like she doesn’t even really realize it in canon,,, its probably post-canon. but the realization would hit her SO hard. like a truck. and it would be so scary at first but then its not, then she feels Right and it feels GOOD and shes so happy and her family would love her and accept her so much and whatever WHATEVERRRR.

anyways, i was just rewatching gf and this was really making the rounds in my head the more i watched, because its kind of how i experienced being trans myself (and im transmasc so LOL) like. just repressing the thing i thought was bad and overcompensating like crazy, until i realized… that its not a bad thing to be. other people making you feel bad about it doesnt MEAN its bad. and then that realization that your identity not being what you thought it was doesn’t mean you change as a person. you’ve always just been you. but it feels better. it feels real.

[insufferablemod]

actually checking out pesterquest for the first time and

lmaooo nailed it B)

[capseycartwright]

i thought about buck and eddie speed running their relationship from friends directly to marriage a little too long and made this. bon appétit.

no ok, in all seriousness. i have never done anything like this before so bear with me, but: with valentines day coming up, i thought it would be an absolute delight to make february the month of friends to fiancés and challenge you lovely talented people to create fun friends to fiancés content for buck and eddie - fic, art, and everything in between.

because friends to fiancés is the trope of all tropes for buddie. they're going to realise they're in love and run to the courthouse and its deeply important to my mental wellbeing that we collectively decide to embrace friends to fiancés as much as humanly possible during friends to fiancés february.

please. i even made u a banner about it.

[aclockworkreader]

a bit of a personal ramble because fuck it, i’m posting whatever i want on here:

the past couple years have been some of the most difficult of my life. my mom being unexpectedly hospitalized twice, the worst creative burnout of my career, the grief of reading the news about palestine every day, deep rooted anxieties about not being good enough resurfacing at an all time high, and realizing i was unhappy around people i thought i’d love forever. without getting too dark, i’d never felt more hopeless.

but even through all of that, even with the state of the world right now and the impending doom of waking up each day, i think this might be the most fearless i’ve felt in a very long time.

i just want to be alive and create and build community and share a space where we all still feel hope for our world. and that’s what i’m going to do, through the fear, through all the shit of life, i’ll be here.

[flimsy-roost]

I keep getting frustrated with AutoCAD because it feels like everything happens so slowly. this is definitely in part due to my still learning how to use it, but also because I've already spent a year doing all of this in pencil. it took me 45 minutes to make an autocad title block yesterday. I could do it in 5 on trace.

it also falls in line with what I've begun to understand about my learning style, that I can learn how to use a single tool exceptionally well, but fumble severely with a toolbox. to me a pencil is a tool I can use to do a lot of things with, but autocad, despite technically being a single program, presents itself as a toolbox of atomized functions. similarly, when we learned traditional color rendering, I was initially paralyzed by all the different colors and pigment materials- after a year of practice, I have strategies for depicting specific things (eg. water flow on a conceptual plan, layers of pencil/pen/marker for individual flowers), but if you asked me to render a car I literally wouldn't even know where to begin.

Processes > Ingredients.

my first career was in molecular biology, but I got a C in my university Molecular Biology class because, even though I knew (and know) exactly how all of the processes happen, I kept (and keep) mixing up the names of the proteins.

I maintain that the reason Organic Chemistry is such a nightmare class for most people is because it simultaneously has too many processes to understand (chemical reactions and puzzles) and too many ingredients to memorize (molecules/chemical parts), meaning a student would have to be strong in both to succeed as it is currently taught.

I can make it from my house to a couple dozen different places without a map no problem, but I always use navigation apps because if there's an unexpected detour, I'll have no idea where I am. I couldn't make it unaided from one of those places to another without going home first.

If I have a specific tool to focus my attention on for extended periods of time, I can skirt my way around general impairments. I have pretty poor strength and dexterity in my hands and fingers; I can't open jars, and on bad days I struggle a lot to tie my shoes. but I can finesse a micropipette to individual microliters, and I'm typing at an impressive WPM for someone who can't always open child safe bottles.

hell, I'm pretty sure the reason I can drive and drive well, when so many autistic people can't, is because it was presented to me from an early age as a tool I could master: between those kiddie ride-on cars, driving my dad around in golf carts on vacation from age 11, and driving my parents' car up the long empty road to our house from age 13, by the time I Officially Legally started learning how to drive, I already understood how to operate a vehicle, so I could focus my energy on learning the rules of the road and on how to deal with stressful traffic situations.

this is a true ramble without a planned ending, but I wanted to mention something else: all of the above is true for me, I'm AuDHD. for my partner, who is dyslexic and allistic, the exact opposite is true. brilliant in infinite toolbox situations, but has trouble putting the pieces together in contexts outside of his core competencies.

that's all

[gojoest]

satoru is mad excited once you start dating. he wants to experience everything with you asap, every aspect of being a couple. 2 mins into being official he’s like “let’s go”, you ask “where?” and he’s like “to our house” and it’s just the jujutsu high dorm room he’s currently using due to his busy schedule. everywhere’s home when it’s with you though. loves all the signs of your cohabitation. every time he steps foot into the bathroom and sees your toothbrush next to his his heart flutters and his cheeks get all red and he smiles the most adorable smile, this man truly appreciates the little things. his eyes well up tiny bit when he sees your clothes on his bed or tossed over the chair or when he’s serving the table and he places two pairs of chopsticks instead of one bc it’s no longer just him. you see him standing there staring at the table and ask “what’s wrong? is there something missing?” and he just pulls you into his arms, kisses your forehead and tells you “no, not anymore”