#truly a hard day
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October 22th, 2024, Tuesday:
What is life if not the urge to rest permanently? Sometimes that's all I want. I feel so lonely even if I'm surrounded by people. It's so sad when nobody can speak the language of our souls, cause when we try to translate we lose so much of ourselves. Hard day, hard night.
#the diary of a kafkaesque girl#truly a hard day#i can't even describe it it was just bad#franz kafka#diary entry#october#October 22th
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Maybe we never had a chance.
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#a-yuan#Ultimately...despite how hard we try to reach people - sometimes it just is not possible.#Sometimes all you can do is wish that things could have been different. You pen a note with all the things you want to say -#and then you let it go. The words stay unsent and unspoken. You just watch the rift between you grow until you're too far away to try again#It is a sad end! It is two people who want to be closer but do not have the right capacity to do anything but shut doors.#Worse yet; it's two people who feel it is not their place to try and impose anything more.#It takes so long to heal from endings like that. You never get enough closure when there is still a faint hope of 'another day'.#It's a false amicability. It's closing a door and telling yourself that at least the windows are unlocked.#WWX will keep up his friendliness as a way to hold LWJ at a distance. LWJ can only try to help so many times.#Speaking of tragedies of trying to help; Let's talk about the addiction metaphors in this episode.#WWX tells LWJ in fairly straightforward terms that he does not *want* do be doing ghost cultivation.#What he wants is to protect people - by any means necessary. If he had another option he would take it.#The path WWX 'chose' is one that is deeply mired in external shame and taboo. He jokes about it but it clearly doesn't feel great.#And I put 'chose' in quotes because just like many who find them selves in bad situations - the choice is an illusion.#He's adamant that this is 'his' choice. That he is in control.#Better to be villainized that endure the terrifying reality that you lack any ability to have choice anymore.#If he had the choice - truly had the choice - he would not be doing this.#You can't help those who don't want to be helped. So of course all LWJ can do is watch from the side. Offer a hand when he can.#This life was a tragedy and the countdown to it all blowing up started a long time ago...
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revisited my “what if tawnypelt’s children were the three” warriors AU 🤪
#wc#warrior cats#dawnpelt#tigerheart#flametail#my art#trying so so so hard to get back into drawing but it’s truly like pulling teeth these days
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yuri month day 28: please be mine ♡
(femslashfeb prompt list)
#minifemslashfeb2025#stardew valley#sdv haley#haley x farmer#surprise....!!! it's... ME!!!!!#how could this be... mini yuri...😳#YES BECAUSE I LOVE HALEY MWAH#another quick one today because I've had one hell of a month#IT'S MOKA @MOKADEV'S BDAY BY THE WAY!! GO LOOK AT THEIR FEMSLASHFEB STUFF#PLEASE!!! MY PRECIOUS FRIEND!! WE WERE HYPING EACH OTHER UP THE WHOLE TIME#WHEN YURI MONTH GOT HARD... WE HELPED EACH OTHER YURI OUT#also I promised I would do a yumeship/selfship for the last day if they did so#truly the biggest enablers we are#their pieces are all so goood. froths at the mouth#go gogo . my friend moka!!! it's their day!!!!!!#EVERYONE SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOKA!!!#doing my summary tomorrow I'm so sleepy#GO LOOK AT THE TAG THERE'S SO MUCH GOOD STUFF#I CAN'T WAIT TO GO THROUGH IT TOMORROW TOO YAAYYYY#I'M SO HAPPY WITH HOW WE DID!! DESPITE IT ALL!! HAPPY 2025!!!#I might cycle back and finish some of the art that didn't make it this month#I have a lot of doodles. quite happily#smiles serenely. yuri duty has been completed again
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redesigning my headcanon for Sebek's parents, based on important new information (SCALES)
(you can't see it but they're both wearing crocs)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#they are truly the most inspiring love story of our generation#though i guess he's not dr. zigvolt since zigvolt is the clan name...#unless he took her name which i absolutely could see. why would you ever not want to be called zigvolt.#this does tie nicely in with my headcanon that sebek's siblings got more of the fae features than he did#and he has a Complex about it#i get the impression that sebek's siblings are much closer in age to each other and also have more of their dad's chill#so sebek is sort of the baby of the family and he's got a Complex about that too#i think a lot about the zigvolt family for characters who have never actually appeared#on the subject of actual canon though#i do actually really appreciate that both sebek and silver each had a little moment of reassuring each other#that this is 400 years ago and also incredibly unfortunate circumstances#and present-day reality lilia and baul love them very much#(i do think sebek is secretly baul's favorite grandkid)#it was just nice to see! especially from sebek! he is sometimes a very thoughtful boy and it's always nice to see that side of him#sebek trying SO hard to get baul to like him though 😭#and lilia being like 'aw i think you're getting kind of fond of him :)'#i love. Characters.
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Boba can have a bit of a breakdown as a treat some time. There's got to be a limit to how much trauma he can fit into his vertically challenged body.
Better late, than never, I hope you'll agree @staranon95 thank you for asking! 💖
Polyamorous/platonic poses reference post
And all the other drawings I've done so far
#I will figure out headshapes one day i swear... drawing bald heads is my other nemesis besides the color green -.-#7 more to go! I was meaning to finish one of these each week so that I might be done by... March? but ugh.... that's clearly not happning#bobadincobb#I entertained the idea that Din should be in the middle for about a minute before I decided that it's boba's turn!#my art#poly sketches#star wars fanart#tbobf fanart#sw fanart#cobb vanth#din djarin#boba fett#you wouldn't believe how hard it is to draw just slivers of faces. or I struggled A LOT at least. Like truly A LOT#the mandalorian fanart
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the only duo ever
#charlie slimecicle#qsmp#qsmp Brazil#baghera#ITS CUTE THO#blatant lie they b making everybody a duo these days#and the best part is that you can literally see them being the only ones signing#in like half the karaoke videos posted#they truly went hard
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olruggio gets his wish to turn into a kid again for one day or something i dont even know
#witch hat tag#orufrey#IM SO TIRED i didnt even care to work hard to make the last page impactful enough I DONT CARE ANYMORE#i have to see things through to the end even if a scribble idea becomes 18 “pages” BUT THIS CONCEPT DOESNT EVEN MATTER#just going to low effort doodle men kissing from now on truly i do not care <- probably will be back to comicking in 2 days
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Fell asleep before I could post it here
Stressful week defeated with a result of me forgetting how to draw Siffrin before I sketched again
Too focused to keep a hold on it in a way
So there was this, which I prefer with a neutral-sad face instead

Like this but I thought it was a bit too... That
After that I've redrew an expression from that one scene. Just because Ost said "Here you go "Do You Remember? (Our Country)" time!"
Same thing is why Mal Du Pays are here
#fanart#my art#isat spoilers#isat#isat siffrin#isat fanart#isat mal du pays#Also a starry hat exists now#I love their terrified expression#And I finally got to sketch Mal Du Pays in digital#Anyway I've passed the hard exam#And most of the other exams too which is great#But that took full control of my luck from me#Which is really like a super power in a way#I got the same questions for exam twice by pure luck of choosing the one I wanted and felt right#But when stuff you have no control over happens when you want it that's truly a good luck day#Which was yesterday today is neutral in that I think#I'm super tired because I was sketching until 8 am#in stars and time#act 5 spoilers#act 3 spoilers#I had to double remember that one because I wasn't sure#Anyway good morning and good night depending on when in the timezone are you#It's 11 am#sketch#artists on tumblr
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people on instagram saying new years day isn't a nice romantic song and is actually full of red flags... I am going to start biting
#apparently this is why her and travis are endgame because so high school is her only truly happy love song........#i'm sorry but every time people point to an 'i'll love you when life is bad and i want us together through the hard times' lyric#as a red flag it just screams never been in a substantial relationship#the romance is in the fact that there WILL be days when you strike out and crawl home and there WILL be times when you're scared#because that is LIFE but you choose the person you want to SHARE the good and the bad with#there's nothing wrong with a cutesy flirty honeymoon stage song but i Will Not be convinced that's ever more romantic#it's ok to let a love song stay a love song! not everything needs to be retroactively made to fit this supposed 6 year torturous struggle#talking#taylor swift
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my fav photos of max and daniel from this weekend because i need happiness rn + the clip from max’s radio of him thanking daniel








#my boys#i genuinely cannot do this anymore#I’m trying really hard to not think anything about unconfirmed news#but any daniel related content i see keeps sending me into tears#i hate this sport and how at the end of the day it just comes down to business not the actual sport#my heart is truly breaking and everything just feels like an awful dream#but a max podium and daniel fastest lap made me feel a bit better#max verstappen#daniel ricciardo#maxiel#singapore gp 2024#f1
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something interesting i realized while on the vessel-making screen in the deltarune introduction is that it's physically impossible to make kris: there is no hair that perfectly matches theirs (none have the cowlick or the right jagged shape on the bottom), and there is no sweater that perfectly matches theirs (none have a single stripe). this is fascinating, as it perhaps suggest that, if we (the player) had a choice, we *wouldn't* make kris. they aren't something we want, or are even capable of wanting, rather something we're stuck with.
and i suppose the fact that they can't be *created* as a vessel is telling, because we didn't create kris -- they weren't made for us, they're not a player avatar. they're a pre-existing person we just happen to gain possession of.
we weren't made for each other; they don't want us, and we don't seem to want them either (if the inability to choose to create someone like them says anything); funny, then, that in a way we're "soulmates"...
(both pictures are from the deltarune wiki!)
#melonposting#deltarune#deltarune kris#kris dreemurr#deltarune analysis#deltarune theory#kris is such a fascinating person. i want to study them under a microscope#we make them do things they otherwise wouldn't: wonderful things. horrible things.#at the end of the day who will kris be if their actions have been almost entirely us?#what responsibility will they hold for the manipulation and violence we've made them perform?#or what connection will they truly have to the friends we've directed them to make and the good times we've forced them to have?#this is just a random kid at a hard point in their life suddenly directed by an omniscient god with an indecipherable moral compass#kris and the player meant nothing to each other before - but now we hold kris' fate in our hands. we mean everything to them in a sense#and now as we play this game and are compelled by its story - including the things we have kris do - does kris not hold our fate as well?#do they not mean everything to us? (they mean everything to me anyway)#god this game kills me a little bit. god i love it so much
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I’m so obsessed with Drink With Me you guys don’t understand - the resignation, the acceptance of what will inevitably come in the morning, the choice they made to stay and see it all through to the end, despite everything.
Then Grantaire says:
“Can it mean you fear to die?”
“Can it mean your death means nothing at all?”
Which are such strong and beautiful lines, but also the voice of all their fears. Maybe it was all for nothing. Maybe they died for a belief that could never be.
And yet the next verse is happy and hopeful and dedicated to camaraderie. They don’t want to die, but they will. And they chose to spend their last night with their friends.
“Here’s to you, and here’s to me.”
#because all that matters in the end is that we were here and we will be remembered#and there will be others after us singing our songs#and maybe they will get the happy ending we fought for so hard#truly one of the best songs of the musical#used to be in my top 5 but now is in my top 3#happy barricade day y’all#les miserables#les mis#enjolras#grantaire#drink with me#les amis de l'abc#barricade day
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camchase as a hilson parallel except it’s chase who is 100% wilson and cameron who is 160% house
#hate crimes md#malpractice posting#chameron#hilson#yes i'm tagging this hilson. bc i am right#trust me on this. it’s way more accurate this way.#sure chase us a house parallel in other ways but in this?#cameron who keeps self sabotaging and is afraid of failure and refuses to try#cameron who keeps trying to reduce the relationship to rational and emotionless terms#to make it scientific against all evidence and feeling#who is terrified of that kind of vulnerability#who has suffered terrible heartbreak and loss and lets it color every inch of her#who refuses to change and open up because that’s a loss of control#and chase who really truly believes if he tries hard enough it will make up for any lack#who is loyal to cameron to the end and takes all manner of neglect and thoughtlessness#not because he’s so selfless and wonderful and kind but because he’s just as screwed up#and knows it#and feels like cameron is maybe his only chance#maybe his first real chance#at any kind of love of affection#and spends most of his time looking desperately for connection in all the wrong ways#settling for the first people he sees#falling in love and being unable to sustain or fake it longer than a few days#i am. telling you.
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#rgg#ryu ga gotoku#yakuza series#ryu ga gotoku 7#yakuza like a dragon#yakuza 7#ichiban kasuga#masato arakawa#ryo aoki#snap sketches#edit: two versions cause im indecisive about everything ever#this one goes out to anon ..... hi ....#Truly ask really did just. make me wanna draw em LMAO#idk why i decided they should get takoyaki afterwards but idk. best thing to do before you go to jail vjaLRKVKE#tbh i just know that whenever i was upset my sis would take me out to get food#it wasnt often since shes not home much but on the off chance she caught me on a bad day we'd always get ice cream or somn#ironically my sister's coming home from a trip later today and my sister's always been my best friend tbh so. funny timin for this doodle#i wont go on a mile long tangent like i usually do so ill just say my sister's really cool and important to me and i cant wait to see her#def why y7 hits hard for me ..... the FAMILY bro ........ beating aoki with a metal pipe as we speak#nuff of that tho. for now i sleep for ten seconds bye everyone
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I do think it pisses people off how … good… your relationship with Togame is
#I could spend 400k words in m#these tags talking about all the little things but I afear it might be boring#so anyway instead I’m just gonna say togame has been the biggest fandom let down since ………… uh I’d be here forever picking the right#comparison you just have to believe me#anyway everyone was so hype about him for like 2 days until we all realized he’s incredibly hard to write#😔😔😔😔😔LMAOOOOO#and I don’t blame anyone I’m on that boat too and he’s the love of my life. truly.#but like. ARGJSHS why is he … *hits him with a pot*#but yeah that’s just to say people see you together and are like. puzzled you have no relationship problems#and honestly get kinda mad you don’t p*ss each other off. like he is NOT supposed to be a good boyfriend. and yet!#mostly cuz of his reputation n whatnot but it’s still funny for them to come to terms with it#caitie blabs
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