#tossawary one piece

[tossawary]

Thinking about a "One Piece" AU, where all of the East Blue Strawhats have actually met each other before Luffy starts sailing. Because Nami and Zoro are both wandering pretty far, easily able to meet anyone, and Sanji is on the Baratie, which is also moving around and may dock at various islands.

So, let's say that the Redhair Pirates briefly dock near Syrup Village on their way back to Foosha Village, and young Usopp stows away so that he can go be a brave adventurer like his father. For a couple weeks, little Usopp and little Luffy are rolling all over town together like frolicking puppies, until the Redhair Pirates are ready to head out again and drop Usopp back home along the way (Yasopp is going to be in SUCH shit with his wife). Little Usopp goes back to tell everyone about this kid he saw eat a devil fruit that turned him into a rubber man, such that Usopp could use the other boy's fingers as a makeshift slingshot to fight off crocodiles! They had great fun trying to figure out Luffy's ridiculous new powers together and coming up with silly attack names.

And no one believes this story from Usopp because it's absurd. After a few years, Usopp starts to wonder if he actually made the whole trip up, if he's just lying to himself too, until Luffy finally shows up again and it's like the Spider-Man meme. "YOU," Usopp says, pointing with a trembling finger, until Luffy makes a noise like a squeaky toy and then tackles Usopp for the tightest and happiest hug anyone has ever seen.

Little Usopp meets little Nami at one point because she's just passing through, picking pockets, waiting for her next ship, and she steals from Usopp what she THOUGHT was money but actually turns out to be exploding paint pellets or something. So, a paint-stained little Nami turns on Usopp like, "WHAT THE HELL IS THIS???" because she's so shocked and angry about her cute new outfit being ruined, and he ends up apologizing (just full on sobbing) to HER for not being a good enough pickpocketing mark.

The Baratie docks at Usopp's island at some point to pick up groceries, maybe they got blown off course by a storm, so young Sanji meets young Usopp at a market stand selling spicy peppers. Usopp spins Sanji long and complicated stories about the flavor and rarity of the peppers, how he labored for many days through terrible dangers to pick them, and then someone else gets back to the stall and says, "Thanks for watching it for me, kid." And Sanji is like, "What?" And Usopp has to admit that he doesn't actually work there. He does know a lot about peppers, though! However, he was also lying a bit... maybe a lot...

Zoro meets Usopp and Luffy because he's hunting bounties through their islands. (Luffy falls in love INSTANTLY. I wrote another post about that.) The little Usopp Pirates become convinced that Zoro is a pirate invading their island, so they get Usopp to come "fight" Zoro, which ends up being Usopp guiding a lost Zoro (the kids set up so many fucking traps, he is NOT having a good time) to the nearest bar. They hang out for a bit. Usopp got a little tipsy. Usopp CLAIMS later though that he fought a ferocious, green-haired pirate who had swords instead of hands.

Young Sanji meeting young Nami is just a classic case of "you let that pretty girl have HOW MUCH in free food???" Zoro probably tracked a bounty to the Baratie at some point and got in a fight with the waiter; Zeff won't just ban the fucker because Zoro did actually pay his bill and Sanji HATES it. Zoro and Nami could have met at any point in their travels; they could have even had a navigator & bodyguard setup for a little while, before Nami ran off with all of some pirate bounty's treasure.

The Baratie usually wouldn't dock somewhere like Foosha Island, but they were in the area and Zeff wasn't such a fan of Goa Kingdom. Little Luffy wasn't even allowed in, but Sanji fed him some food out the back anyway, and Luffy decided then and there that Sanji was going to be his cook. Sanji said, "You are fucking crazy," of course, but no one has ever reacted to his All Blue dream like Luffy did. So when Luffy finally comes looking for him, Sanji still immediately says, "Fuck off, I'm not going!!!" but he's also smiling so wide at seeing this crazy kid again. It fools no one.

Nami probably went treasure hunting in the jungles there. She screamed at the top of her lungs when a 15-year-old boy dropped out of the trees and said, "Hey!!! What are you doing? Ohhh, are you treasure hunting? Can I help?!" (Ace has just set sail. Luffy is bored.) Nami could use the help, so she allows it, figuring that she'll find a way to trick Luffy at the end. But after their wacky adventure together, Luffy is like, "That was fun!!! You can take all of the treasure now, I don't need it," and young Nami doesn't say no but it breaks her brain a little bit. What kind of idiot says that the adventure is the best part and actually MEANS it?

So, they're all screwed by the time that Luffy sets sail. He's coming for them! He'll find them all eventually! ♥️

Alternatively: none of the East Blue Strawhats meet each other beforehand but they do all meet Ace when he sets sail. Has anyone in the world ever talked about their little brother this much??? This Luffy kid doesn't sound like a real person. And then two years later, they all run into Luffy and they're like, "Oh, shit, he's real."

[spockandawe]

get to know you better game! tagged by @veliseraptor, thank you!! :D

last song i listened to: this is the cruel wars, by the dreadnoughts. i loooove songs about recruiting sergeants, and i was delighted to recognize the first part from fighting for strangers by steeleye span, but that song is from the seventies and you can kinda tell! It's really awesome to have a more modern version that's a bit more of a bop and easier to sing to

currently reading: oh man, I'm actually a little stalled now. I read like 80% of moby dick in a day and a half last weekend, and I've still got a hangover. I'm reading Peerless, and reading One Piece (chapter 750/1100), and reading tossawary's sqh/yqy fic, for generous paused interpretations of that present tense 😆

Currently watching: not much! I guess LOADS of soulsborne theory while i do other stuff (I don't soulsborne), and a friend and i might be starting the mandalorian on our very slow star wars quest this weekend

Currently obsessed with: macrame, crochet, one piece. None of these are things i should be focusing on! My hands are suffering, and my head is full of silly nautical men in ridiculous makeup, ahaha. The winter Dead Inside times have apparently passed, but my focus is NOT cooperative right now, oh my god

[writing-frenzy]

Plz let Airplane be awesome- Fic Rec

So I have a hankering for our favorite disaster of an author plz and thx. I went searching, daydreaming, and sometimes down right spelunking for some of that good Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky character fics. Did I also find some good tasty Moshang on the journey? Yes and it was good.

So, here is a place for all the treasure I managed to collect. Hope You all enjoy!~

(And any recs for more goodness will be fully accepted, plz!)

A Well Wherein Serpents Are Coiled by Nighthaunting - I am poison / And you will drink me / And you should be so lucky

Shang Qinghua transmigrates into his own terrible novel as a baby. The fact that this seems to be a world based on his first draft, where things actually happened and the plot did matter, is less than comforting. Having a second chance is nice, but ending up as cannon fodder and dying offscreen are the last things he wants to do. The only way to avoid his 'canonical' fate is to do as the System demands and try to fix his mistakes from within the world he created. Somehow this ends up with a bright-eyed and bushy-tailed Luo Binghe as an An Ding Peak disciple, because writing about a kid being miserable and seeing a kid being miserable are apparently two entirely different skillsets.

The best, my heart will not move on, I am sinking with this story, it has consumed me and all I can say is ‘thank you, but can I go even deeper?’ like... it has the best world building I have ever seen for any SVSS fanfic, it is canon in my mind and I just end up loving An Ding Peak even more? like wow, I did not know that was possible. Read the fic and the only regret you will have is that you have reached the last updated chapter so soon.

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pride is not the word I'm looking for by Tossawary - A Pre-Canon Canon Divergence fic. Shang Qinghua goes to take a self-indulgent peek at his baby protagonist son and gets a kick to the shrivelled heart for his troubles. Ahhh~! He gave up on changing canon or preventing character deaths years ago! What is he doing, helping his protagonist son's adoptive mother like this?

This story, this story, was one of the two to make me so damn hungry for all the Airplane!Shang Qinghua goodness. It leaves me wanting for more. (Also, give Airplane more family bonds and friendship, make our favorite little disaster feel things.)

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it must follow, as the night the day by Tossawary - Airplane Bro transmigrates into his own web-novel only to find out that the System messed up his world! Shang Qinghua is a demon in this world! All the characters supposed to be humans are demons in this world! And all the characters supposed to be demons are...?Moshang's first meeting in a Role Reversal AU.

Look, if I mention their first one, of course I have to mention the amazing Role Reversal au; I can’t not miss this beautiful piece of Demon!Airplane awkwardness of being hot for the icy cultivator who could easily gut him in a second. it is so good, I love.

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The An Ding Peak Lord's Holy Cheat Sheet by JerichoJaspersJeromeJr - There's a dozen basic things that Shang Qinghua should know but somehow doesn't. There's a hundred mysterious secrets that Shang Qinghua knows even when he shouldn't. There's a thousand profound mysteries that Shang Qinghua knows even when no mortal should. Mobei-jun has noted it all.

*Cackles* Kneel before our mighty god Airplane!  

-

Keep Your Friends Close by HeavenlyDusk -  The one where Shang Qinghua and Scum Villain Shen Qingqiu become friends, except neither of them really know what friendship actually is.

This series, by all good fiction is so damn great! I live for this disaster friendship of Shen Jiu and Airplane (and only shit, I shouldn’t laugh, but cockblocking Shen Jiu is not something I expected, but Gives me a mighty need, even if he made it his mission for Moshang to never happen.)

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The Eye of the Emperor by fishpoets -  The attention of Great Lord Luo Binghe is not something to be coveted.

Now, this is Mobei-Jun’s POV in this one-shot, but just how soft he is with his hubby is so cute, and we get to see Shang Qinghua being a sneaky crafty and protective of his own hubby. for all of Luo Bingge’s threating aura, I can’t help but grin at how this couple, so determined to be there for each other, and ready to plot. 

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A Political Match by tuesday - It was the day of Shang Qinghua’s wedding, and he was going to be sick.

So... BL author Shang Qinghua accidently seduced his fav character, Mobei-jun, the fic. my only regret is that there isn’t more.

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unplanned by fencesit - Shang Qinghua doesn't mean to do it. Okay, okay, from the outside he totally gets how it looks purposeful. Definitely! It definitely looks like he planned it really carefully! Like, you can't just slip and whoops break someone out of Huan Hua Palace's Water Prison, you know?

:D Alternate first meeting and a tasty prison break? go get yo man my disaster fav.

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Sea foam and grenades by Sunnystar - Long before the Peaks were known for their esteemed cultivation, An Ding had another title. [A world where Shang Qinghua goes off plot for his children disciples.]

Ow, oww, owwww owwwwwww ouch! be prepared to have your heart pickled before your eyes, before it is roasted over an open fire and then promptly eaten before you. and with the left over crumbs of it left over, still find no, you have not had enough, you need to make sure your tear ducts are still existing after all... Just, make sure you mind the tags with this story, because it gets dark, bits of fluff seen here and there to at least trick you into thinking there is still a light hanging around. it is a lot to take in, but oh man are the emotions delicious even as I have to take breaks from this story because of all the feeling I have to face.

---

So, there ya have it; might have more added in the future, but for now, I at least wanted these up. Part Duo Here~

And feel free to add more, I am always up for more of our boi!

[svsssartreblogs]

3,000 Post Round Up!

Well, it's been a hot minute since the 2,000 post round up - about 3 months - BUT, that's half as long as it took to go from 1k to 2k, so, we're growing, SVSSS fandom!

Things!

We're currently at 620 followers, about 120 up from the last one, when I was just shy of 500.

If you need specific triggers and/or squicks and/or other stuff tagged, please let me know. You can see all the warnings I currently tag in the blog’s pinned post.

If you’re an artist in the fandom, and you want to make sure I see your work, note that I check the #svsss tag daily (but not any of the other many tags people use for this fandom…stuff is just way too scattered) for new works, or you can contact me directly either by @ my personal account (unforth - tags to this account don’t register, sigh) or by dming me the new work, and I’ll add it to the queue.

Thanks for following this blog, supporting artists, and helping the Scum Villain fandom grow!

-unforth

and, lastly, some tag stats (read more)

Ten Most Commonly Reblogged Characters: slowly but surely I'm getting pieces for more side characters, which is exciting to see!

shen qingqiu (1,662 works) (no change)

luo binghe (1,374 works) (no change)

shang qinghua (664 works) (no change)

mobei jun (592 works) (no change)

liu qingge (404 works) (no change)

yue qingyuan (166 works) (no change)

the system (77 works) (no change)

original characters (59 works) (+1 from 2k post)

sha hualing (58 works) (-1 from 2k post)

zhuzhi lang (53 works) (new!)

ning yingying (40 works) (new!)

Ten Most Commonly Reblogged Ships and Platonic Relationships: the rare pair squad is growing apace, and a few recent fandom challenges have helped some of the more popular rare pairs grow the art stash!

bingqiu (850 works) (no change)

moshang (475 works) (no change)

liushen (194 works) (no change)

qijiu (99 works) (no change)

bingliushen (22 works) (no change)

bingjiu (20 works) (+1 from 2k post)

bingyuan (18 works) (+2 from 2k post)

liujiu (16 works) (+2 from 2k post)

mingling (15 works) (-1 from 2k post)

shen qingqiu and shen jiu are brothers (12 works) (-4 from 2k post)

Ten Most Commonly Reblogged Artists: right now, 820 artists have at least one work reblogged here. At 2k, it was 614 artists - so 206 new artists have been added to svsssartreblogs! I love to help folks spread their work, so it's always exciting to see we have a lot of "first timers." And reminder, this isn't a popularity list, just a "how prolific" list.

selpuku (51 works) (+2 from 2k post)

asparklethatisblue (51 works) (new!)

tossawary (43 works) (-2 from 2k post)

vodkassassin (38 works) (new!)

lilyfromthewoods (37 works) (+1 from 2k post)

sevenjiu (35 works) (-4 from 2k post)

saysong91 (31 works) (-3 from 2k post)

labrujadelteatro (29 works) (new!)

kukuandkookie (29 works) (new!)

foxyjoy-art (28 works) (new!)

thesirencat (27 works) (new!)

levia-san (27 works) (-3 from 2k post)

official art (27 works) (new!)

Ten Most Commonly Used Other Tags: This blog is relatively lightly moderated compared to my TGCF and MDZS art sideblogs but there are a few other tags I use, some of which I use a lot...

comic (735 works) (no change)

laughs (621 works) (no change)

chibi (285 works) (no change)

shen jiu (252 works) (new!)

fantasy au (246 works) (-1 from 2k post)

lemon (208 works) (-1 from 2k post)

modern au (208 works) (no change)

mo dao zu shi (165 works) (-2 from 2k post)

creature luo binghe (152 works) (no change)

tian guan ci fu (151 works) (-2 from 2k post)

[tossawary]

One of the worst parts about Ichigo/Orihime as a pairing is that I like both of them and I think they could make a very cute couple of overpowered weirdos together, but the writing is just NOT THERE for them most of the time. It is NOT supporting them as a compelling couple so far and NOT delivering on the potential chemistry.

You know when someone writes fanfiction for your ship and you want to enjoy it, but it's just so OOC and they've filed all the interesting rough edges off the characters and don't explore what it would actually be like for these two to be life partners? So, it's like, "This isn't even really my ship... You fucking Gentrified Flanderized Them." It's like that but it's fucking canon, baby.

I would rather a relationship not become canon at all than become canon in the most boring way possible. "Naruto" is the same way. How are these authors so dedicated to making potentially perfectly tolerable ships suck sooooo bad most of the time? (I know it's the misogyny. They CANNOT write women consistently well.) I am almost delighted with frustration.

At least with "One Piece", despite the many writing crimes committed against female characters all the fucking time, I feel relatively certain that Oda will kill Luffy off at the end of the story before he writes an epilogue where Luffy is married with kids.

[tossawary]

It's always funny to encounter someone who has... a skewed idea of what "One Piece" is like due to Monkey D. Luffy's silly vibe, usually in part because they also have the perception that cartoons are exclusively for kids. Like, "Pirates aren't just groups of friends who go on wacky adventures together! Real pirates are thieves and murderers and constantly on the run from people who want them dead!"

And it's just... "One Piece" has many flaws, and it IS wacky a lot of the time, but... uh, I cannot emphasize enough the depths of corruption and cruelty and violence it depicts from both pirates and governments. The audience is going to be regularly putting their hands over their mouths in the face of some of the evil shown here, both impossibly fantastic and shockingly true to ordinary historical greed. Luffy is an in-universe outlier and everyone around him thinks he's fucking crazy.

[tossawary]

In the live-action "One Piece" adaptation, there's a brief confrontation in which Cabaji says that Zoro chased him and his brother through the jungles of Goa Kingdom or something. Which made me think IMMEDIATELY about an AU in which Zoro and Luffy meet early, when Luffy is around 15 or so and Zoro is around 17, sometime shortly after Ace has set out on his own adventure and Luffy is on his own.

So, like, imagine Zoro being this 17yo bounty hunter who thinks he's hot shit, people are starting to call him "THE Demon of East Blue". He gets one Cabaji brother but the other escapes, leaving Zoro injured and alone in the jungle (similar to the side wound that Zoro gets at Orange Town in the manga). It's getting dark, he has a corpse to drag back to a Marine base somewhere back in Goa Kingdom, and there are beasts here. He thinks he can see a tiger, stalking him in the bush.

And then some 15yo in a straw hat and shorts bounces out of the trees going, "WHOOOOOAAAAA, you're SO cool! I was watching your fight! You're amazing! You should join my pirate crew!" Like... what? (If there was a tiger, the tiger has fucking RUN FOR IT. It doesn't want to be EATEN.)

So, Luffy drags Zoro back to Dadan's place for medical aid ("YOU BROUGHT A BOUNTY HUNTER INTO MY HOUSE?!" Dadan yells, while her guys patch up this kid anyway) and politely introduces Zoro to Makino ("I'm not going to be your first mate, don't introduce me that way," Zoro says for the tenth time already). And Zoro ends up being convinced to stick around Dawn Island and Foosha Village to train for a month (and also to heal, but that's less persuasive), with Luffy following him around like a starry-eyed puppy the entire time, unless he's dragging Zoro off to fight beasts and each other in the jungle. Kicking the shit out of each other is a sign of FRIENDSHIP.

Seeing Luffy's burgeoning fighting skills is enough to make Zoro go, "Maybe this kid is alright," and hearing Luffy talk about dreams is the beginning of Zoro's doom. But he's not going to sign up until Luffy is more impressive! If Luffy wants him for his crew, he has to come find Zoro when he sets out on his own adventure. And Luffy agrees this is reasonable even if he's going to miss his new best friend sooooo badly.

Now, I'm a Zolu fan (ace-spectrum Luffy), so I like to imagine Zoro and Luffy having a really dorky teenage romance between future monsters here. If only because when Luffy and Nami bust into Captain Morgan's Marine Base, Luffy can go (after 2 years of having Makino keep track of Zoro in the newspapers), "Oh, my boyfriend is here!!! 😃 I wonder how much stronger he's gotten? I need to impress him so that he'll join my pirate crew!!!" And Nami and Koby can be like, "What the FUCK are you talking about?! The PIRATE HUNTER?! The demon who kills pirates?!" Luffy: "Yeah! ❤️"

Even better if Luffy has already gone to a couple different islands (with or without Koby), loudly going, "I'm going to be King of the Pirates! And also, HAS ANYONE SEEN MY BOYFRIEND?! He has green hair and three swords and he gets lost really easily!" Or maybe Luffy was just shouting this on Alvida's ship and around the town under Morgan's control? It doesn't really matter. It just has to be loud enough that Garp finally catches wind of this situation.

[tossawary]

It's very tempting to write a Kuina Lives + Strawhat Kuina fanfic for "One Piece" because more women is always nice! Also, a butch woman / potentially nonbinary character on the ship would be nice.

But also: it's funny to imagine Kuina and Zoro being legally married for convenience purposes (hospital visits, bailing each other out of jail, financial bullshit collecting bounties from the Marines) partly because it would fuck with the East Blue Strawhats (except Luffy, who doesn't care) that someone like Zoro is married. (THEY'RE 19!!!) Zoro would openly refer to Kuina as "the ol' ball and chain" and they probably sleep in the same bed (it's cheaper + Zoro is super warm) and I think it would make Sanji cry that Zoro is successfully married before him.

[tossawary]

You know, the more I think about it, the funnier I find the concept of Monkey D. Luffy /& Boa Hancock (especially paired with Aro-Ace spectrum Luffy and Aro-Ace spectrum Hancock) just for what it must look like from an outsider's POV.

For the record, personally, my favorite Luffy ship is Zoro/Luffy - also with Aro-Ace spectrum Luffy, that's basically non-negotiable for me, I don't care whether he's sex-favorable or sex-repulsed, but he's definitely ace. It is so funny to me to think about Luffy's incredible pull with aro-ace spectrum folks. People who once thought "sucks for you fuckers obsessed with sex and/or romance, I'm built different" (Roronoa Zoro, Koby, Trafalgar Law, Boa Hancock, Bartolomeo, etc.) find themselves fascinated by this little rubber man, who regularly declares war on the government and can swallow a roast chicken whole. Some of them are happier about this than others. Some of them WISH they just wanted to fuck or marry him, that would make more sense than this shit.

But, okay, back to Luffy and Hancock (as a friendship or queerplatonic situationship, whatever, doesn't matter). Like, let's pretend this is some kind of Modern College AU (Luffy is probably not IN college, tbh, he's just there to hang out with his friends and for any food anyone makes the mistake of leaving out). You are on your way to class and you see this woman walking down the street and she is - hands down - the Most Beautiful Woman In The World.

Super tall, with incredibly long, muscular legs in shockingly high red heels, a short skirt, artful cleavage, a waterfall of sleek black hair, beautiful face, striking makeup, gorgeous jewelry. Looks too old to be an undergrad student. She looks like if a martial artist became a supermodel. Walks like that too. The phrase "please step on me" comes to mind, but not to the lips, because that's sexual harassment, and also this woman looks like she could stab you through the heart with a kick and her shoe heel, killing you instantly.

She sees someone and her entire face lights up. She runs forward (how is she running in those shoes) squealing in excitement and embraces this guy you didn't even notice before, shouting about how much she missed him, and kisses him on the lips. He is... uh... three-quarters of her height at the tallest. A real Mr. Short King.

Wow, he has a babyface. And a scar on his cheek and on his chest, which you can see because he's wearing an open button-up, in eye-searing rainbow colors and decorated with monkeys, and jorts with fur at the cuffs. And mismatched flip-flops on the wrong feet. And a straw hat on a string around his neck. It looks like he hasn't brushed his hair today. It is impossible to judge his looks because his outfit is too distracting. Now the Most Beautiful Woman in the World is blushing bright pink as she clasps one of his hands in both of hers. Mr. Short King is using his other hand to pick his nose as she talks.

They walk hand in hand together over to where an incredibly expensive-looking bright red car is parked. Mr. Short King opens the driver's door for the Most Beautiful Woman and she apparently nearly swoons at this chivalry. She climbs into the driver's seat and he gets into the passenger's side (Luffy cannot legally drive and also cannot actually drive). They drive off together. What the fuck kind of Roger-and-Jessica-Rabbit-ass Sugar Mama relationship did you just witness?

Boa Hancock keeps a photograph of Luffy as her phone background and also on her desk at work. Everyone is always like, "Is that your... son?" And Hancock is like, "No, that's my number one choice of future fiancé! Isn't he sooooo handsome?" And people can only be like, "...Okay, but why are there police lights in the background? And something is on fire? It kind of looks like he's in the process of being arrested..." And Hancock responds dreamily, "They didn't catch him! He climbed into my exercise duffel bag and I carried him out."

[tossawary]

Reading the end of "Naruto" on a whim was funny because there was a lot about that final battle that was really Not Good, but I was approaching it with neither investment nor expectations. "This story can't hurt me because I don't care" vibing.

And then I hit the Sasuke/Sakura stuff at the end and I was suddenly struggling with anger and something that felt a lot like nausea. WHAT was that?! It was like getting slapped in the face. Sakura's character development got yanked out of my arms and thrown out the window to die AGAIN.

I don't ship it, but I wasn't necessarily against the pairing as a concept until canon's execution jolted me out of indifference. If I WAS a shipper, I'd be furious at what a crap deal both of these characters I supposedly liked were being given by this ending. Fuck all of Sakura and Sasuke's previous motivations and experiences and growth as people, I guess? Fuck their problems and grievances and arcs, I guess??? Fuck having resolution for all of their previous interactions??? I don't necessarily need either of these characters to have a happy ending, but they and their relationships (and every other character and relationship tbh) deserved far BETTER writing for either a happy ending or a tragic one. Wow. This is sad! The quality of this ending is really not good! Wow.

(This is the kind of terrible execution that I'm talking about when I say that I would prefer Luffy dead at the end of "One Piece" rather than married to a random woman and having bio-kids. If I have to choose between some Sasuke/Sakura type of shit and Luffy going out on a far more thematically coherent and in-character bang, if those are my only options, then I want my boy dead.)

Like, this story element becomes almost compelling because it sucks so much??? I'm fascinated. It's a canonical pairing that's not just failing to stick the landing, it's breaking both hollow legs, and I've been letting it go every time I think about it because otherwise, I will go mad trying to understand just how much a person can suck at writing convincing romantic relationships. It's SO bad. Damn.

[tossawary]

Overall, in the live-action "One Piece", I liked the way that they did Mihawk visiting the Baratie. I still prefer the manga/anime (Zoro SEES Mihawk fuck up an armada and this wonderful idiot is like, "Yeah, I'm gonna fight him next,"), but I understand why they shifted the Don Kriegs around in order to fit the arc they had created for their limited number of episodes for the East Blue Arc, and I think it was probably the right choice even if it changing the Don Kriegs does give us less of the Baratie crew. All of the arcs were filed down and I can just go back to the manga to see all the East Blue minor characters properly.

I like the fact that OPLA has such a different feel. I think it's fun when adaptations embrace the fact that they're inherently different. I really liked Nami and Zoro's little drinking and questions game. And I thought Usopp getting super drunk at the bar and Mihawk being RIGHT THERE listening to him talk was SO FUNNY. Like, yeah, that gives off the vibe that this warlord does just casually visit bars as he travels, in between fighting armies for funsies, and now I get to also imagine Mihawk casually shopping at specialty goth clothing stores and buying bottles of wine to go as he travels. (And now I have to wonder what would have happened if Zoro had run into Mihawk somewhere like Funky Bar (the bar he mentions to Kuro, which yeah, they did kind of make it sound like a gay bar).)

I like Usopp/Kaya, but now I also like to imagine for a second that Usopp could have accidentally (or on purpose! If you're not going for Usopp/Kaya) HIT ON Mihawk at the Baratie. Maybe he was just trying to compliment the guy's fit or remark on his beautiful eyes or something, because Mihawk definitely has an aesthetic going on, and these words came out a little too flirty? Maybe it was a random bout of drunken courage sure to collapse quickly?

And, in this silly OPLA AU, I like to imagine Mihawk leaning into this at least for intelligence-gathering, like, "Let me buy you a drink. Tell me more." (Side note: Mihawk doesn't really seem like a bar hookup guy to me, like, in general, but counterpoint: SHANKS sure does!)

So, Nami, across the bar, can be like, "Whoa, Usopp's actually pulling some guy." (Mentally, she is evaluating Mihawk as, like, a sugar daddy robbery target. It's like second nature to her at this point. Are they going to have to interfere? Usopp is REALLY drunk. Can she swipe Mihawk's wallet if they interfere?) And Zoro turns around to look and he pauses for a really long time before saying, "...That's Dracule Mihawk, the World's Greatest Swordsman."

So, things proceed pretty much the same way from there, Zoro challenges a warlord and nearly dies, but now Nami and Zoro can hold "flirting with a warlord at a bar" over Usopp's head as an embarrassing story FOREVER. (I think if Usopp tried to own this misunderstanding to lessen the embarrassment, his lying would take over, and this would somehow lead to widespread rumors that someone on the Strawhats is secretly MARRIED to Mihawk or something, because Usopp's luck is terrible. The Navy has to reach out to Mihawk like, "ARE YOU IN LEAGUE WITH THE STRAWHATS THROUGH MARRIAGE?! CONFIRM OR DENY." And Mihawk thinks it's so fucking stupid that he refuses to answer at all.)

After the timeskip, the first thing that Zoro ends up saying to Usopp after 2 years is something like: "Mihawk says hey."

Usopp: (⁠･⁠o⁠･⁠;⁠)

Did Mihawk really say hey? Does he remember Usopp at all? Is Zoro just fucking with Usopp? Usopp will never know. (Maybe Mihawk said something like, "My regards to your crew," but Zoro is totally just fucking with Usopp.)

[tossawary]

Concept: an Ace/Sanji fic, but the main issue is that Sanji has no fucking idea what to do about being wildly attracted to a man and Zoro is the only gay guy he knows available to consult on anything. Impossible to say which one of them hates this situation more.

[tossawary]

Another potential "Strawhats meet early" AU that you could do, based on the fact that Zoro was wandering around East Blue as a bounty hunter for a few years, is an early meeting between Zoro and Nami. (I really liked their more jaded interactions behind Luffy's back in the OPLA show.)

Nami doesn't trust anyone, but Zoro is evidently willing to let mean women boss him around, so it's possible that Nami might decide that spending a little money to hire some personal muscle might be better for her in the long run. She can run two-person scams! She can use Zoro as intimidating backup! And Zoro could decide that having a skilled navigator to lead him to his bounty-hunting targets is worth parting with a cut of the money. Repeatedly getting lost was really eating into his training and fighting time.

(He doesn't know about Nami's connection with the Arlong pirates. Nami is keeping them away from each other. She leaves Zoro at a bar on another island when she needs to go back to Cocoyashi. Zoro knows that something is up, but he's not going to involve himself in the mystery until Nami tells him she needs help with whatever she's doing, trusting that she can handle her shit.)

Bonus points if this bounty-hunter & cat burglar pair go out to dinner at the Baratie at some point. Nami is annoyed at Zoro for whatever reason and so plays him up as her really shitty boyfriend (perhaps even really shitty husband) to the waiter. Whenever they loop back around to the Baratie with Luffy and Usopp (story events presumably happen differently but I'm not fussed to work out the details at the moment), they explain nothing, and it takes until Drum Island or something until someone finally breaks it to Sanji that Nami and Zoro are partners in crime but not together like he thinks they are.

Usopp, nodding sagely: "Ohhhhh. I was really starting to wonder, but I was way too scared to ask! We support you in your, uh, unromantic criminal relationship?"

Zoro, oblivious to Sanji's shoe coming for his head: "Thanks."

[tossawary]

But, for real, the funniest "Strawhats meet early" AU that I can think of at the moment (focusing on the East Blue crew here again) is an early meeting and team up between Zoro and Usopp.

Zoro somehow ends up on the Gecko Islands. Maybe he's lost, maybe he's following a trail, but the ultimate ending here is that he somehow catches Captain Kuro out and beats him and his followers. (See OPLA episode where Zoro says, "Haven't I seen you somewhere before?" to Klahadore.) Zoro only doesn't get killed because Usopp swings in, utterly terrified, to shoot pepper in people's eyes or something, and/or Kaya musters her strength and anger to hit someone from behind with a table leg. (Kaya's parents live, maybe? Can't remember the details of the timeline at the moment. Zoro could probably manage this as young as 16 years old if need be? Maybe he left his island a year earlier than is traditional because he felt ready to go.)

Yay, Zoro is a hero! And Usopp is a hero with him! And Usopp has very little left in Syrup Village besides Kaya, who doesn't really need him, and so he begs Zoro to take him on as an apprentice! Not as a swordsman? Although, of course, (lying:) Usopp would be an amazing swordsman, obviously! But as a brave warrior of the seas! Like, in general? He's only 14-16, but he's got heart!

And Zoro is obviously like, "No, fuck off." And Usopp replies, "Okay, but you can't stop me from just following you around anyway? Please? I mean, fuck you! I do want I want! Oh, please don't kill me." And Zoro is like, "Fine, whatever." Because Kaya's parents gifted a boat (not the Going Merry) to the both of them, Usopp can actually navigate a little, and Zoro is too tired to just physically throw Usopp off the boat at the moment. He'll just drop Usopp off again whenever Usopp's courage runs out.

And so begin the teenage adventures of Captain Usopp and his first mate, Zoro! ("We're not a crew," Zoro says. "And if we were, you wouldn't be the captain." "Okay, but which one of us is steering here?" Usopp says. "No! Don't take the wheel again!! You're going to kill us both!!!) They're going to sail around East Blue in circles because Zoro is still training and Usopp keeps desperately coming up with excuses not to enter the Grand Line yet.

Depending on how early these events happen, if you really do try and do this with Baby Zoro (16yo) and Baby Usopp (14yo, truly baby, Yasopp, come and get YOUR CHILD), then you could fudge the timeline a little and they could run into 17yo Portgas D. Ace on his way to the Grand Line. Ace isn't about to bring babies into the Grand Line with him, but holy shit, he can at least show them how to sail properly before he goes, what the fuck. Oh, shit, he LEFT DAWN ISLAND without teaching Luffy how to sail, FUCK. He needs to get a Den Den Mushi RIGHT NOW and CALL MAKINO. (I don't know whether or not Ace could actually sail at that point in time, possibly not, but he's pretty clever, and I like to imagine he at least talked to people and tried to study before going. If he didn't, then wow. And I do imagine that someone tried to give Luffy the basics of sailing, but the information slipped immediately out of his head.)

[tossawary]

I have two main hopes for Nico Robin's casting in the live-action "One Piece" adaptation. The first is that I would love to see a woman of color as Robin, preferably darker-skinned and with a large nose. One of those really classic profiles, you know?

The second is that I think it would be cool if they made her a little older. She's 28 upon her first appearance in the manga, which is significantly older than the teenage crew at this point, but the OPLA main cast are all very obviously 20+, so I think it would be cool to push OPLA Robin into her 30s.

I know there are timeline issues to think about and it is significantly awful that Robin had to go on the run at only 8 years old. But I also don't think that Robin's story necessarily becomes less tragic if you shift things so that she had to go on the run at 13-14 years old. That's still horrifyingly young and young enough to be called "Devil Child" if you consider that a necessary component. Personally, I won't even mind if Robin's backstory happened when she was 17-18 and was gearing up to start her adult life as an archeologist when everything was ruined, because I imagined a 38-year-old Robin kicking ass and the mental image was so attractive that I had to sit down.

[tossawary]

One of my other strongest hopes for future seasons of the live-action "One Piece" is (and I am aware that this is hugely subjective, feel free to disagree) that I kind of hope Chopper is actually a youngish and short actor in make-up (with CGI touchups? whatever the fishmen had going on) rather than a fully CGI creature.

I mean, I won't mind if Chopper is a CGI creature. I thought that the special effects in OPLA were overall pretty good. The News Coo was very cute. The Sea King was fun. But most of the time, the show was real people interacting with other real people, and I thought that this atmosphere was hugely beneficial to this adaptation. I think that they'll probably do a pretty good job if Chopper is a mostly CGI creature, it's definitely doable, but I also think having a much more expressive and reactive speaking character around constantly and casually is much more difficult (and expensive) than a silent, blank-faced bird present for a few minutes, and I would rather have more Chopper than less Chopper if redesigning him to be more humanoid would give us that. (He can be fully CGI during transformations, obviously.) I really like seeing these actors inhabit these characters! I've seen some really cool Chopper cosplays.

My other argument towards making Chopper more of a human in reindeer make-up is that, while I think adorable babyish Chopper is extremely cute and the humor of him being so small and cute most of the time (while being a very talented doctor and able to transform into more beastly forms) is funny, I would... also like to see Chopper taken more seriously as a teenager and as a character. I think fandom, and maybe the story itself, has a tendency to give Chopper less attention because he does seem to fit more of a funny mascot appearance. (I also saw a Chopper post-time-skip redesign that made him more a lanky teen, both more like a human and more like a reindeer, and I liked it a lot more than how he apparently became even shorter. And it made him being mistaken for a tanuki even funnier.) I don't think anything truly important about Chopper's character will be ruined if he's allowed to look a little older and be a little taller. He's fifteen years old!

If we end up with Canonical Babyish Chopper, identical to the manga, that'll be fine! But I will think it's a missed opportunity for the live-action show not to explore and present a different side of Chopper's character, to an audience who might take him more seriously as a hero and as a person if he's allowed to appear more like a humanoid reindeer and another teenager / young adult crew member, rather than looking like a gag character. Yes, ideally, we SHOULD all take Chopper seriously even if he looks like a gag character, but I think the reality is that a lot of people don't.