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literaryavenger · 9 months ago

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Happy Birthday

Summary: It's your birthday and the only person who doesn't seem to be excited about it is you.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Mentions of death. Angst. Fluff. Language probably. My poor attempts at being funny.

Word Count: 2.5K

A/N: This story was completely self-indulgent, but I hope someone out there likes it!

Masterlist

You’ve always been very reluctant to celebrate your birthday.

You haven’t had a birthday party since you were 12. The following year your mom died a couple of days before and neither you nor your family were in the mood to celebrate anything.

It wasn’t by any means unexpected, she had been sick for a few years, but it still hit you hard.

You were the youngest and were far too young when she first got sick to really understand everything going on.

You were 8 and all you really remember is watching your mom get more and more sick until eventually there was nothing more the doctors could do.

Her death hit you hard and you closed yourself off, never talking about it or even crying after the day of her funeral. To this day you’ve still never cried, in front of others or even by yourself.

You started exercising to channel all your energy, refusing to do anything more like the therapy your family suggested.

When you were 15 you discovered SHIELD and decided you wanted to help others, so you signed up for the SHIELD Academy, working your hardest and pushing yourself to your very limit.

You ended up being not only the youngest cadet ever, but the youngest to actually graduate and then the youngest recruit at SHIELD at only 16 years old.

Natasha was very impressed when she heard about you and took a liking to you, convincing Fury to make you part of her team during her missions and teaching you everything she knows.

That’s how you ended up in the Avengers Initiative, not that you felt you didn’t deserve it since you know how hard you worked and everything you gave up to work towards this achievement.

The team themselves were initially skeptical since you were barely 18 during the battle of New York, but they were quickly proven wrong when they saw how well you handled yourself against the Chitauri.

You were devastated when SHIELD fell, but carried on as an Avenger, battling Ultron and then moving to the Compound with the team.

You met the actual Bucky for the first time when you were 22, during the whole Civil War thing with Baron Zemo. Like Natasha, you were on Tony’s team, fighting mostly Pietro, but the conflict eventually ended.

It took Tony some time to get over the whole “Bucky killing his parents while brainwashed” thing, but, as he likes to say, he can’t call himself a genius without admitting that Bucky didn’t have much of a choice.

Thanks to Tony’s help Shuri was able to find a solution to Bucky’s brainwashing faster than she would’ve alone, meaning Bucky didn’t have to go back into cryo and was pretty quickly cleared to join the team, about a year after the airport battle in Leipzig.

You were warmly accepted by everybody and, the more the team grew the more you felt at home with these people.

And now you wish you could burn down the whole compound because, somehow, Tony convinced you to have a birthday party for the first time in 13 years because, in his words, 'you only turn 25 once'.

Good news is you managed to make him limit the guest list to the team and other people close to you like Maria Hill and Fury. Bad news is you’re still gonna be the center of attention, which you hate.

You couldn’t stop Tony from making everyone dress up for the party, and you couldn’t stop the team from getting you gifts even though you insisted all you wanted was everyone together and to have fun with them since for the longest time nobody ever even knew when your birthday was.

What you didn’t realize was that the only person more worried than you about your gifts was Bucky.

Since he joined the team the two of you have gotten close, starting with his first training with the team where he very loudly told Steve about his disbelief that someone as young and small as you could actually be an asset to the team.

You quickly put him in his place by taking him down after less than two minutes of sparring, taking full advantage of his underestimating you because he “didn’t want to hurt a pretty little thing like you.”

Admittedly he was impressed and wasn’t shy about letting you know that, while the rest of the team snickered at his initial shock when you pinned him down.

You became friends after that, not as close as you’d like but friends nonetheless.

If you were honest with yourself you’ve been harboring a little crush on the supersoldier, but he’s never shown any interest so you resigned yourself to just being his friend.

Something that you did come to treasure, though, is your and Bucky’s late night talks.

It started with you walking in on him in the kitchen on a late night where you couldn’t sleep, nothing new to you, but the two of you barely talked other than acknowledging each other.

You took a bottle of water and left.

A couple of days later you ran into him again and you stood there in silence while you made yourself a cup of tea and then left for your room.

A few days later again he was just sitting there and said nothing as you made your tea, except this time you put a cup in front of him and silently took a seat next to him at the counter.

Two nights later when you arrived at the kitchen he was already there with a cup of tea in front of him and one in front of the seat next to him.

You didn’t want to assume it was for you, but you took a chance when you noticed it was the cup you always used, a blue mug with Stitch on it that says “Let’s get weird”. Your favorite in fact.

You hesitantly sat down next to him and, without you having to ask or without even looking at you, he told you that the nights you stay up late because you can’t sleep you tend to be more quiet during the team dinners and while you hang out afterwards.

You didn’t say anything in return and just sat there, trying not to overthink how much he seemed to watch you.

But the more nights you spent like that, the more you two talked and you gathered quickly that Bucky is a very observant person, nothing more.

You loved the time you spent together after dark where you’d talk about everything and anything, but come morning it was almost as if it never happened, which you came to accept.

It weirdly made the nights you spent talking even more special, which was almost every night.

But back to the present, you’re currently getting ready with Natasha and Wanda, who know much more than you about hair and makeup and are always happy to help you out with getting ready for Stark parties.

You put on the black cocktail dress with rhinestones all over the corset and a slit down the left side, then the three of you make your way to the party room and you take a deep breath before entering.

Everyone is already there, all dressed up in fancy clothes as they all shout “Happy Birthday”.

You laugh and say hi to everybody while they all take turns hugging you, there’s not too many people but everyone important to you is there.

Even Laura and Clint’s kids are there, which you consider a second family at this point, since Laura always did treat you like a daughter.

You hate to admit that it's a nice party.

Knowing you, everyone makes an effort to not put you too much at the center of attention and you just go around talking to your friends like every other party.

Eventually time comes for the cake and, the moment you kind of dreaded, opening the gifts.

Since it's the first birthday you allowed the team to celebrate everyone decided to go all in for your gifts, which you picked up on from the very first gift you open.

Pietro got you a first edition of “The Picture Of Dorian Gray” which is your all time favorite book, Wanda and Maria got you a leather jacket and an amazing pair of boots that you knew were expensive because you were all out shopping together when you came across them.

Steve got you a gold heart-shaped locker with a picture of the team inside it, Natasha got you a charm bracelet with a little charm to represent everyone on the team, and Sam got you a cute necklace with your birth stone on it.

When you open Fury’s gift you start laughing since it's a gun, a SIG SAUER P226 to be precise, which is very Fury.

“It was my first gun when I joined SHIELD.” He says with a smile and you smile back, knowing how much thought he put into this gift.

You open Clint’s gift next, a bow and arrow that he already taught you how to use, and Laura got you a pair of diamond earrings.

Your heart melts when you open Lila, Cooper and Nathaniel’s gifts, respectively a friendship bracelet, an Avengers action figure of yourself and a Stitch plushie.

The three of them hug you tightly as you say thank you and now you only have two gifts left, Tony’s and Bucky’s, and they’re both little boxes.

You open Tony’s next, thinking it’s some fancy necklace or earring but you frown when you see a car key.

“Is this the key to your car?” you ask Tony, knowing full well you’re holding the key to an Audi R8 Spyder, the car Tony’s let you borrow so many times you’re now wondering if he’s gifting you his spare set of keys.

“No.” He says casually “It’s the key to your car.”

You’re even more confused and simply stare at him with your mouth gaped, not really processing the information.

“Y-you… You got me a car?!” You almost yell out of shock and everyone else starts laughing at your antics when you start basically jumping up and down and hugging Tony, squealing like a little girl.

“Well, come on, let’s go see it!” Tony says enthusiastically after you’ve calmed down, and you get up, just as enthusiastic, but are stopped by Steve’s voice.

“Wait, wait. You have one gift left.” He says, picking up the small box and giving it to you. “It’s from Bucky.”

You were so pumped up by the car, you almost forgot about it and completely miss the mischievous look Steve gives Bucky and the murderous glare Bucky gives back.

You also miss Bucky starting to protest before you open his gift, but he instantly shuts up when he sees your face falling the second you open it.

It’s a small necklace with a blue rose in it, it really looks like something you’d give a little girl more than a 25 year old woman.

You look at it for a minute, running your finger on it before you raise your head and look at Bucky.

The whole room goes silent as they all watch you worriedly, everyone noticing immediately that tears are streaming down your face.

Nobody understands what’s happening and nobody knows how to react or what to do, it’s like they’re all frozen by the sight of you being vulnerable for the first time ever.

Meanwhile Bucky’s heart is beating so loud he’s sure everyone around him can hear it, and he feels himself starting to panic at the thought of having ruined your birthday with that stupid gift.

Everybody else got you expensive gifts and all he did was get you a small, cheap necklace that reminded him of a story you briefly talked about once on one of your late night talks about a necklace you had as a kid.

He saw it at the mall while looking for a gift for you, remembering the sweet smile you had on your face when you mentioned it and the fleeting sad look he thought he saw when you told him you lost it when you were 12.

He was really proud of himself for that gift, but the more he saw the other gifts you got the more he regretted his choice, especially after Tony gave you a fucking car.

And now you were crying, not saying anything while just looking at him.

He doesn’t know what to expect from you at the moment, nobody does, he thinks you might yell, throw his gift back at him, tell him how much you hate it and him.

But you surprise everyone by throwing your arms around Bucky’s neck, hugging him tightly while crying into his shoulder.

You honestly forgot telling Bucky about that story and certainly didn’t expect him to remember it, especially since you always got the feeling that he didn’t care about your talks as much as you.

You just assumed that come morning he deleted everything you told him to make room for more important things, and you didn’t blame him.

But he didn’t.

What you didn’t tell him about the necklace is that your mom gave it to you because blue roses were her favorite, you had that necklace since you were born but you somehow lost it the day of her funeral.

That day you lost the two most important things in your life and cried yourself to sleep, and that was the last time you allowed yourself to be weak and cry.

Until today.

Bucky hesitantly wraps his arms around you, rubbing your back hoping to get you to calm down. He looks around at the rest of the team, panicking a little and not knowing what to do.

Everyone else is as clueless as he is, never having seen you in such a state before.

Bucky starts apologizing, his heart breaking at the sight of you crying, and he feels horrible that it’s because of him.

You shake your head quickly and pull away a little to look at him, wanting to reassure him you’re not sad or angry but incredibly happy, but words refuse to come. You take a deep breath to calm yourself and finally manage to speak.

“Thank you. You have no idea how much this means to me.” It’s quiet, but it’s something, and it’s enough to make Bucky let out a breath of relief at knowing you don’t hate him or his gift.

He brings you back in for another tight hug, almost forgetting about everyone else in the room as you hug him back without hesitation.

You’re honestly not even embarrassed at crying, all you care about at the moment is Bucky, his arms around you while he lets you bury your face in his neck, like you’ve been wanting to do for years now.

“Happy birthday, doll.” He whispers in your ear and, for the first time in 13 years, you really feel like it is.

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thatsmzbitchtoyou · 1 month ago

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The Boss -(long) Oneshot

Word count: 9284 This one got away from me... sorry. Hope you like it, tho!

Part 2 Part 3

Y/N smiled as she stared up at the huge high rise building. It was her first day working at Avengers Legal, the offices of Barnes, Rogers and Stark. She had been really lucky to find an opening as one of the head lawyers’ personal assistants, she just didn’t know which one yet. She had a little background in law, but didn’t go to law school, as much as that killed her parents. A little bump in the road in the shape of her now ex boyfriend had derailed that future, and after freeing herself she was now working on her fresh start. She followed the instructions from the head of HR that she had been in contact with, and walked out of the elevator to the smiley woman sitting at the reception desk.

“Hello, how can I help you?” she asked in a chipper tone.

“Hi, my name is Y/N Y/L/N. It’s my first day?” Y/N said.

“Oh! The new personal assistant! Yes, Pepper told me,” she said happily. She stood and held out her hand. “My name is Kamala Khan. Receptionist.”

“Kamala, that’s beautiful,” Y/N complimented her, and Kamala smiled even wider.

“You’re sweet. I like you already,” Kamala said. “Follow me.” She moved around the desk and walked ahead of Y/N towards the hallway to the right. “Now I don’t know which partner you’re working with,” she said lowly, sidling up to Y/N. “And please don’t let this scare you off, but each of them work differently.”

“Okay,” Y/N said, speaking quietly as well.

“If you get Steve, that’s the Rogers part, he’s a sweetie. Super friendly. If you get Tony, the Stark part, he’ll tease and make fun of you, he’s very sarcastic, and sometimes he’ll flirt or compliment you like crazy, but it’s never gross and he means nothing by it. He’s married to Pepper.” Y/N nodded, intaking all the information as best as she could. “Then there’s James, the Barnes part. He’s the more serious of the three. Friendly, but busy, very professional and no-nonsense. He likes things done quickly and efficiently. If he lets you call him his nickname, Bucky, then you know you’re in the inner circle.”

“Inner circle?” Y/N asked as Kamala stopped in front of a door that read Pepper’s name and title.

“It’s like the main team of Avengers Legal,” Kamala said, nearly whispering. “The partners, their top legal assistants that get to have the most fun or high profile cases, and only the best personal assistants. Those are the ones that get to travel with them, and usually get to network with top of the line people in the industry. It opens a lot of doors,” she said, raising her hand to the door. “So good luck with whoever you get.”

Y/N nodded as Kamala finally knocked. “Come in!” a voice called out. Kamala opened the door and gestured for Y/N to enter first. “Y/N! Welcome,” Pepper said and stood from her desk.

“Hello, it’s good to see you again,” Y/N said, walking over and shaking her hand.

“Thank you, Kamala,” Pepper called out behind her, and Kamala smiled and closed the door. “I’m sure she gave you all the beginner’s gossip,” Pepper smirked as she sat back down and gestured for Y/N to sit at the chair in front of the desk.

“Yes, she did,” Y/N huffed a laugh.

Pepper rolled her eyes. “The partners are all just overworked, typical men. Not nearly as special as they like to think they are.” Y/N bit back a smile. “That being said, after reviewing your profile and discussing things with them, I think you’ll be best fit with Mr. Barnes.” Y/N felt a little trepidation at that from what Kamala had said, but nodded. “He’s…quiet,” Pepper said, choosing her words carefully. “But honestly one of the best attorneys in the state. He runs a tight ship, and expects the best out of anyone working under him. If they disappoint him, he can have quite a temper, but he’s normally very friendly.”

“Are you trying to convince me to back out?” Y/N asked with a smile.

“No! God no, please stay,” Pepper said, waving her hands in front of her. “I’m just trying to forewarn you. He’s had a hard time keeping a personal assistant for the last few years.”

Y/N nodded. “And he is aware that I’m not a paralegal?”

“Yes,” Pepper nodded back. “We don’t blur lines when it comes to personal assistants versus legal assistants.”

“Then I’m ready,” Y/N said.

She signed the contract for her employment, then Pepper gave her a tour of the office and had her meet the teams and other partners. Finally they walked into the office that had his name on it. “Buck? I’d like to introduce you to your new personal assistant,” Pepper said as she held the door open for Y/N. Y/N walked in and took a quick look around at his office before her eyes landed on him sitting in the desk chair. She had to stop her eyes from widening when she met his gaze. That is the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen.

“Meet Y/N Y/L/N. Y/N, this is Bucky. Oh!” Pepper rolled her eyes. “I’m sorry, James.”

Bucky narrowed his eyes at Pepper but gave her a teasing smirk. “Thanks Pepper,” he said in a dismissive tone.

Pepper scoffed then squeezed Y/N’s upper arm. “Come see me before you leave today.”

Y/N smiled and nodded at her and Pepper walked out, closing the door behind her. Y/N took that short moment to look him over. Tall, broad shouldered, and from what she could see, built under his suit that was impeccably tailored to him. His dark brown hair was long and tied back in a small man-bun, which was surprising as a lawyer, but that coupled with his full beard offset the austerity of his suit and made him seem approachable. His bright blue eyes were looking her over, too, like he was sizing her up. It was an intense stare, and she had to stop herself from shrinking under his gaze.

She took the initiative and walked forward to his desk. “It’s nice to meet you, Mr. Barnes,” she said, offering her hand to him.

Bucky looked at her hand then back to her face, his hand reaching forward as he smiled politely. “It’s nice to meet you,” he said, shaking her hand firmly. Y/N made sure to be firm in her grip with him, and his smile slightly widened. “Take a seat, and we can go over what it is I expect from you.”

Y/N sat and took out a notebook and pen from her bag, getting comfortable in her seat then looking up at him expectantly. Bucky seemed to be watching her carefully, and she could start to see a small tell in the type of smirk he gave as to how he was feeling. The wider smirk he gave Pepper was a friendly one, whereas these small ones as he greeted her were when he was impressed with something or pleasantly surprised. They had a good, long discussion about what it was he wanted, how he liked to work with others, his normal routine and the possibility of travel at times, but she wouldn’t hold her breath for that.

“That’s about everything I can think of,” Bucky said. “Any questions?”

“Yes, what’s your favorite drink order?” Y/N asked as she finished jotting down her last notes.

Bucky scoffed. “My favorite drink order?”

Y/N smiled. “Just in case.”

His impressed smirk came back. “Lately it’s been sweetened matcha.”

“Sweetened with what?” Y/N asked.

“Surprise me,” Bucky said.

Y/N smiled widely. “Yes sir.”

Bucky frowned. “No sirs. Mr. Barnes in front of clients, otherwise Bucky is fine.”

She beamed at him for accepting her so quickly. “Alright…Bucky.”

***

This job was a baptism by fire. Y/N was thrown into work life with Bucky, accompanying him all around the city, taking endless notes in meetings and relaying messages to his legal team. Per Bucky’s request she became close with all the assistants on his legal team, learning the process of working on a case and seeing how they all worked together. She also scheduled everything in his personal life, making sure he was getting to doctor's appointments, picking up the dry cleaning, making sure the house cleaner was on time, taking personal phone calls during the work day, and handling anything else she could anticipate for him.

Kamala was right, he was very particular and wanted efficiency above all else. He didn’t like people wasting his time, and expected everyone to be at their best while at work. There were times Y/N would catch him having a casual moment with one of the other partners, Steve, who was his best friend from childhood. He would laugh at something Steve said and she’d be gifted with the sight of his full, real smile that he rarely gave anyone. That being said, as the months went by he was opening up to Y/N, teasing her, making jokes and even at times bordering on flirtatious.

Steve was still looking for a new personal assistant, since his previous one, Peggy, he just so happened to start dating seriously, and since they struggled to differentiate work versus their personal lives she had resigned. Every once in a while Bucky would lend Y/N out to Steve to help with some things that he needed while Pepper was in the process of finding him a new assistant. “Good morning, Steve,” Y/N greeted him one day while she was helping him for a week. She daintily put down a large coffee cup in front of him and his eyes widened.

“Oh you angel,” he whispered, grabbing the warm cup. He brought it to his lips, taking a slow sip and he hummed appreciatively. “You’re heaven sent, you know that?”

“I know,” Y/N smirked.

“Oh I see how it is,” Bucky’s voice came from behind her. She turned to find him walking toward her into Steve’s office with a teasing smile. “One week with this jerk and you forget all about me.”

“Punk,” Steve spat as he sipped his coffee.

Y/N rolled her eyes and held up the other cup in her hand. “How could I forget your cafe style sweetened matcha with three pumps of lavender and oat milk?” Bucky hung his head and huffed a laugh as he took the cup from her. “You just came here before I had a chance to come to you. So needy,” Y/N teased him. She took out her work phone provided by the firm and started scrolling. “By the way, your date from last week keeps texting and calling. What excuse do you want me to give dearest Dottie?”

Bucky groaned and Steve laughed loudly. “What was wrong with this one, Buck?” Steve snorted.

Bucky glanced at Y/N like he wasn’t sure how to talk about it in front of her. “Well, judging by these texts, she’s very thirsty,” Y/N said in a deadpanned tone, making Steve almost spit out his coffee. “Like, all of the time,” Y/N said. “Shall I?” she smiled wickedly, waving the phone in front of Bucky’s face.

His eyes widened and he slammed the drink down before lunging toward her to grab the phone but she sidestepped him and ran behind Steve’s desk. “Read it! Read it!” Steve said, standing from his chair to block Bucky from getting to Y/N.

“Don’t you dare!” Bucky growled as he tried to go through Steve.

“‘Let me know when I can see you again, baby. We can pick up where we left off,’” Y/N read, her voice taking on an exaggerated Bronx, New York accent like what she’d heard from Dottie’s voicemails.

“Oooh where did you leave off, Buck?” Steve asked.

Bucky tried to push past him. “No where,” he grunted.

“These get worse by the day,” Y/N frowned as she read through them. She had mostly ignored them every time she saw Dottie’s name pop up, not engaging in her constant ramblings in trying to get his attention. This was why he gave out the work cell phone number rather than his actual, personal one. “‘I want your tongue so deep inside me I can taste it,’” she read in the accent again, her eyes wide and eyebrows raised high. “Good Lord.”

Bucky finally got past Steve and ran after Y/N as she squeaked and ran out of Steve’s office, Steve’s laugh echoing down the hallway as she moved as fast as her heels would allow her. She ducked into an empty conference room and ran around the table, Bucky on the other side. “‘I feel like a vampire, I wanna suck everything out of you,’” Y/N read, cocking an eyebrow at him. “Jesus, Bucky, where do you find these girls?” He edged around the table toward her and she jerked to the side, making him frown deeper at her. He suddenly jumped and slid over the table, making Y/N screech as she tried to run but he caught her with his arms around her waist, hoisting her up off her feet. She kept the phone out of his reach as he tried to maneuver her to take it from her. “Ooh this one is really naughty,” she giggled. Bucky pushed her into the corner of the room, making her face him as he grabbed at her hands. He finally caught her wrists and as he held them together she read: “‘Fuck me like an animal. I wanna be your little cum slut,’” she finished, laughing at the end of the phrase and losing the accent.

Bucky pried the phone out of her fingers. Y/N’s laugh died on her lips as she looked up at him and saw the look on his face. He wasn’t frowning or smiling, but looked surprised and…aroused. Y/N realized the position they were in. She was pushed in the corner, his leg between her legs with his knee almost cradling her core, the rest of his torso pushing against her front to keep her there, his hand holding both of her wrists against his chest and his face hovering mere inches from her face. His eyes flicked back and forth between her eyes, then glanced at her lips.

Y/N gasped and pushed him away, Bucky quickly backing up with the phone in his hand. He exhaled sharply, his eyes widening. “I…I’m sorry, Y/N,” he said quietly.

“It’s okay, it’s my fault,” Y/N said, shaking her head and looking down. “I’m sorry…I got carried away. I’ll um, let you handle that and you can give it back when you’re done,” she said, glancing at the phone, then gave him a quick look and walked away. She nearly ran to the bathroom, hiding in one of the stalls and sliding down to the floor as she tried to even out her breathing. It wasn’t that she didn’t want Bucky to touch her, in fact she’d had way too many dirty dreams starring him doing much worse things to her since she started working here. She would gladly fuck Bucky, but she didn’t want to lose her job or have to give it up like Peggy had with Steve. She needed this job. She needed to take care of herself, so that if he ever came around, she wouldn’t fall for it all again.

***

The rest of that day she had focused solely on Steve and all he needed her to do. When the day was over she marched toward the front door by the reception desk where she found Bucky talking to Kamala.

“Oh, have a good night, Y/N!” Kamala called out to her and waved.

“You, too, K,” Y/N said quickly, giving her a quick smile. She glanced at Bucky quickly. “G’night Buck.” She walked fast out of the office toward the elevator down the hall. She heard Buck say goodbye to Kamala then follow her out.

“Y/N, hey, hold on,” he called out to her.

She sighed silently as she pushed the down button and turned to face him with a polite smile. “Yes?”

Bucky stared at her for a moment before the elevator dinged and they both entered the elevator. Y/N pressed the parking floor level button and leaned back against the elevator wall. Bucky’s mouth opened and closed multiple times before he finally turned to face her with a heavy sigh. “I’m sorry, again,” he said, his voice sounding strained.

“It’s fine, Buck–”

“No, it’s not,” he interrupted her. “I shouldn’t have…roughhoused you like that.”

Y/N chuckled. “Roughhoused?”

“Yes, I’m an old man, don’t judge me,” Bucky said, rolling his eyes, a small smile on his face.

“I’m sorry I teased you with the texts so much,” Y/N said. “I just have a bit of a…history, and it threw me for a loop for a second.” He looked at her quizzically but she didn’t want to explain. “She’s got quite the vocabulary,” she said with a teasing smirk, changing the subject.

Bucky snorted, hanging his head as Y/N laughed. “Yeah, it was uh…quite the date,” he said. “That’s why I didn’t text her back. It was all just a bit much.” Y/N hummed and he handed the work phone back to her. “I politely told her to get lost and blocked her number,” he said. She took the phone and nodded. “I really am sorry,” he repeated. Y/N met his gaze. He was sincere and repentant, a knowing look in his eyes. “I didn’t mean to hurt or scare you.”

Y/N stared at him for a moment before giving him a small smile. “I know.”

***

Y/N was walking by the reception desk one day on her way back in from lunch when she stopped in her tracks. Kamala was speaking to a man that Y/N recognized. It was Vic, her ex. Kamala looked uncomfortable and met Y/N’s gaze with a concerned look. Y/N’s eyes were wide and she shook her head minutely, hoping Kamala would get the message. Kamala looked down then back up at Vic. “I’m sorry, we don’t have anyone here by that name,” she said sweetly. “Maybe you have the wrong address?” She distracted him, making him face away enough that Y/N was able to slip by down the hallway. Once she was out of earshot she ran into Bucky’s office, closing the door and locking it behind herself. She was panting, trying to calm herself.

“Y/N?” Bucky’s voice came from behind her. She whirled around to face him. He looked confused. She held her finger to her mouth and a call came into his office phone. He frowned and answered the call. “Yes?” he asked. He listened for a moment before looking at Y/N. “A Victor Creed is here to see me?” Y/N shook her head frantically, her eyes stinging with tears flowing fast. Bucky’s face shifted into a look of surprise at her response as he stood. “I’ll come up front in a moment,” he said before hanging up. He rounded his desk and reached out to her, taking her hands in his. “Who is he?” he asked quietly.

“History,” Y/N whispered.

Bucky’s face twisted in recognition at the conversation they’d had weeks before, then his expression became stony. “Stay here. Lock the door. I’ll knock twice once it’s safe.”

Y/N sniffled and nodded as he squeezed her hands, then had her stay behind the door as he opened it and walked down the hallway. She locked it behind him and stood stock still as she waited and listened. She could only hear muffled voices for a few minutes, then Vic’s voice getting louder before a slammed door made her jump. Footsteps came back down the hallway, then two quiet knocks on the door. She sighed as she unlocked the door with a shaky hand. Bucky slowly opened it, watching her carefully. “He’s gone,” he said, taking a step toward her with his hands up. “Kamala is calling security to have him trespassed from the building.” Y/N nodded, gnawing on her lip as her arms were tensed and tightly wrapped around herself. “It’s okay. You’re safe. Everything’s going to be alright,” he said quietly. She swallowed harshly as her tears kept falling. “Can I give you a hug?” Bucky asked.

Y/N stared at him for a moment before a sob broke through, and she nodded as she hung her head. Bucky stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her, holding her close to his chest as she cried heavily. She gripped the lapels of his suit jacket, shivering against him. “I told him it was over,” she cried. “I told him to leave me alone.”

Bucky’s fingers pet the back of her head, running through her hair. “This isn’t your fault, Y/N,” he said quietly. “He’s obviously stalking you.”

She nodded against his chest. After another moment of him holding her she pulled away and sniffed quickly, wiping her face. “God, ugh, I’m sorry,” she grunted, clearing her throat. “I’m so sorry to bring this…drama to the workplace. I thought I had handled it but apparently not. I completely understand if you have to let me go–”

“Why the hell would I do that?” Bucky scoffed. “You’re the best personal assistant I’ve ever had.” He stepped toward her again and reached for her hands, holding her fingers lightly as his thumbs ran over her knuckles. “Here’s what we’re going to do. He’s being trespassed from the building. You will be escorted by security, or at the very least one of us, to and from your car every day.”

“Buck you don’t have to–”

“Like hell I don’t,” he interrupted her with a stern look. “You’ll turn on your location on the work phone and share it with me and the others. And you and I are going to go to the police station to make a report, go online and fill out a protective order or stalking injunction, then drop it off at the court later.” Y/N’s tears came back. She hadn’t been able to rely on anyone for years, had lost all contact and close relationships with her friends and family because of him, so to have someone worry and care about her enough to try to help her was overwhelming. Bucky let go of one of her hands and reached that hand up to wipe away her new tears. “Okay?” he asked.

“Okay,” she nodded.

***

Bucky, the other partners, and the entire office was a godsend to Y/N. He had accompanied her when they filled out the protective order and turned it into the courthouse, then to the police station as she made a report. Working in a law firm was helpful in that she was able to file a cease and desist by the end of the day, and with Bucky’s connections to certain officers at the station was able to know when Vic was served with everything. Over the next few weeks she was accompanied to and from work from her car in the parking garage by someone, usually Bucky, Steve, Tony, and at other times by some of the paralegals. Scott was one of her favorites, always making it seem like she was the president and he was the secret service.

She was grateful to all of them for their efforts and willingness to help her. It made her feel like a burden, but she was quickly reminded that they really didn’t mind when she brought it up. Her protective order was granted, and she proceeded into getting a restraining order since they lasted longer.

Five months later as Bucky’s team was working late on a big case she packed up her bag. “Alright, I’m heading out,” she announced to the room.

They all hummed or bid her half-hearted farewells, their attention all focused on the paperwork in front of them. Bucky’s head snapped up. “Hold on, doll, let me walk you down.”

“Bucky, it’s fine, honestly,” Y/N waved away his concern, backing up to the front door. “It’s been months. I’m sure I’ll be fine. You shouldn’t have to babysit me–”

“Freeze,” he barked at her. Y/N’s eyes widened and she stood still, everyone else falling silent at his raised voice. “I’m coming with you,” he said with no room for argument. He slipped his jacket back on and grabbed his keys before walking up to her. “Let’s go,” he said in a quiet, much more gentle tone.

The ride in the elevator and walk to her car was silent. Once she had unlocked her car door and put her purse in she turned to Bucky. “Thank you–”

“Y/N, I need you to understand something,” Bucky interrupted her. He was frowning, looking down at her with an intensity she’d never seen directed at her before. “You are not a burden. I am not babysitting you. I want to help you. I want you to be safe. I need you…” he paused, swallowing harshly. “I care about you,” he said quietly.

Y/N stared at him in disbelief. She had made good friendships at the office, and she and Bucky had become close, with her managing every aspect of his job and life for over a year. She trusted him, and if she were honest with herself, she liked him as much more than her boss, and more than a friend. But to hear it from him in this context made her feel emotional. She felt tears start stinging her eyes and blinked rapidly to make them go away.

“Thank you,” she replied. “I appreciate that. I…I care about you, too.”

Bucky watched her for a moment before taking a step toward her. He looked down at her for a moment, the intensity in his eyes making her knees feel weak. His gaze fell to their feet then he wound an arm around her shoulders and hugged her, kissing her forehead lightly. “I’ll see you Monday,” he whispered into her hair.

Y/N gently hugged him back, enjoying how his cologne wrapped around her like a blanket. She closed her eyes as he held her, then opened them when he stepped away. “See you,” she said quickly. She gave him a small smile then got into her car. Bucky stepped back and watched her drive away. Y/N didn’t know what to think of the interaction. It wasn’t necessarily work appropriate, but also not quite wrong between friends outside of work. When she got home she tried to shake it off as another strange moment as she took off her heels and dropped her bag in the entryway. She walked to the kitchen, pulling some things out to make a quick dinner when she felt like something was off. She glanced around, then saw a shadow in the corner of the dining room. She froze when she saw Vic standing there out of the corner of her eye, watching her. Y/N knew it was too late, and subtly called the last number she had called, which just so happened to be Bucky.

As it rang quietly she turned around and faced Vic head on, looking him in the eye. When she could hear Bucky pick up she spoke loud enough for him to hear. “What are you doing here, Vic?” she asked, her voice sounding angry, which she was thankful for with how afraid she was.

Vic chuckled and stepped toward the kitchen into the light. He looked rougher than the last time she saw him, like he hadn’t been eating, and he smelled like he hadn’t showered in a long while. His eyes were bloodshot, and with how he swayed as he walked she could tell he was either extremely drunk or high on something. “Hey princess,” he slurred. “Just came to see how things are going. How’s the new boy toy treating you?”

“Boy toy?” Y/N scoffed. “Who are you talking about?”

“That boss of yours,” Vic snarled, stumbling toward her. He tried to reach out and grab her, but she quickly stepped out of his reach. He grunted as he righted himself.

“He’s not my boyfriend,” Y/N said. “Even if he was, you have no right to be jealous of me or who I associate with. We are not together.”

“Right, you being an ‘independent’ woman and all,” Vic mocked her, making air quotes with his fingers.

“Y/N! I’m coming!” she heard Bucky’s voice muffled against her chest from her phone.

Y/N tried to keep her wits about her, thinking through her options. Help was coming. Bucky was coming. Just keep talking. “I am now,” she asserted herself. She angled her body sideways, getting into a better fighting stance and turning toward the front door. “You hurt me, Vic. You controlled, isolated, and abused me. And I deserve better than that.”

Vic laughed. “You deserve what I think you deserve. Which right now, is to be my little cumslut, like you used to be when you were a good little princess. So, get on your knees,” he said, rushing toward her.

Y/N punched him, making his head whip to the side, then used his drunkenness against him as she pushed him as hard as she could away from her, making him stumble and fall to the floor. Y/N held her phone as she ran to the front door. As she was unlocking it Vic ran up behind her and lifted her off her feet, throwing her back toward the dining room where she fell hard on the floor. The phone clattered a few feet away from her, and as she crawled toward it Vic grabbed her feet, trying to pull her back. She kicked and screamed, hearing Bucky’s voice faintly yelling through the phone, a few feet beyond the knife.

As Vic was able to turn her to her back, she punched him again, enraging him further. “You stupid bitch!” he screamed in her face.

Y/N screamed back in his face, then Vic was pulled back off of her. She gasped as she saw Bucky wrench Vic away, put him in a chokehold and fall on top of him. Vic struggled, scratching at Bucky’s arms and hands as he choked and gasped for air. Bucky grunted and tightened his grip more. “Go to sleep, fucker,” he growled. After another minute Vic slowly lost control of his arms, his eyes rolling back in his head until he passed out. Bucky let go of him, but stayed on top of him in case he woke up. “Call the police,” Bucky glanced at her.

***

She watched the police officers and paramedics work on Vic in the entryway, loading him on a gurney that he was promptly handcuffed to. They checked her and Bucky over, treating the scratches on Bucky’s hands and arms and her bruises and scrapes. She was questioned by police officers as they took pictures of her and Bucky’s injuries as well as the knocked over furniture in her apartment. Y/N answered them as best as she could, Bucky sitting with her the entire time until they finally left.

“Y/N?” Bucky called to her, turning to face her. She looked at him blankly. He was watching her carefully, reaching a hand out and taking hers closest to him. “Do you wanna stay here tonight?” She shook her head fervently. “You can stay with me if you want,” he offered. “Would you like to do that?”

Y/N nodded absentmindedly. She couldn’t think of anything better in that moment than a shower and a different place to stay. Bucky helped her pack a bag, then guided her out of her apartment to the parking lot. He helped her into his car, and she melted into the front seat. She felt numb, unable to get her thoughts together to form anything coherent. The rational part of her mind knew that it was trying to protect itself from the trauma of the night, but she couldn’t quite come to that conclusion yet.

She was almost falling asleep when Bucky pulled into the garage of a home. He got out and helped her out of the car, carrying her bag as he guided her into the house. He led her through the house until he walked into what looked like a guest bedroom, setting her bag on the bed. He turned to look at her. “The bathroom is there,” he pointed at a door in the corner. He looked at her nervously. “Do you…do you need, um, help?”

Y/N stared at him for a long moment. She didn’t know what she wanted. Her eyes flicked around the room. “I…I don’t…know,” she whispered.

Bucky nodded. “Okay, well, how about you go shower, and uh, here,” he opened her bag and pulled out some pajamas and underwear, walking to the bathroom and putting the clothes down before coming back out, “and I’ll wait here just in case. Is that okay?”

Y/N nodded. “Thank you,” she whispered. She couldn’t seem to find her voice, afraid that if she were any louder it would somehow make everything real. Bucky nodded and gave her a small, reassuring smile before he sat himself on the bed. Y/N walked into the bathroom, closing the door behind herself. She felt like she was jerky in her movements as she stripped herself of her clothes, heaping them in the sink. She stared at herself in the mirror for a moment. Her hair was a mess from fighting him off, her mascara streaked down her face from the tears she unknowingly shed earlier, and a bruise showing near her hairline from when she hit the ground. She shivered and turned on the shower. The water was too hot, but she barely felt it as she washed herself.

Y/N turned off the water and walked out of the shower. She wrapped herself in a towel as she dried off, fixing her hair and rubbing her face. She looked at herself in the mirror again. Back to normal, she thought. But this wasn’t normal. Nothing about tonight was normal. Nothing about her life for the past few years had been normal. The adrenaline seemed to all wear off in a second, and her sobriety made her gasp. She doubled over as the soreness from the fight hit her out of nowhere, and she cried out as she held herself and kneeled to the floor.

“Y/N?” Bucky’s voice called out from behind the door. “Are you alright? What was that noise?” She couldn’t answer. Her throat was closed, choking on sobs. “I’m coming in,” he warned her, then the door opened. He looked around, finding her on the floor in the fetal position. “Oh, doll,” he cooed, kneeling down quickly. Bucky’s arms cradled her, moving her until he was able to help her stand. “Come on,” he said, grabbing her clothes and leading her to the bed. She cried as he held her, her face buried into his collarbone, her fingers gripping his shirt tightly. He sat her on the bed and kneeled in front of her to catch her eye, reaching a hand up and wiping away her tears. “Can I help you get dressed?” he whispered. Y/N nodded as she hung her head in her hands. She didn’t care about how awkward or inappropriate this was at this point. Bucky handed her her underwear, then closed his eyes. Y/N dropped the towel and put on her underwear quickly. Bucky then blindly grabbed her shirt, opening his eyes while his head was facing down as he fixed the shirt, then closed his eyes again as he held it up so she could slip her head and arms through it. He did the same for her sleep shorts, the backs of his fingertips sliding along her thighs and hips momentarily.

Bucky then stood and opened his eyes, looking down at her as he stepped forward in between her legs. He slowly cupped her face in his hands and made her look at him. “I know it’s a really stupid question, but, are you okay?” he asked.

“No,” Y/N shook her head, a fresh wave of tears starting to fall. “He…he was going to hurt me again.”

Bucky nodded. “I know, but you did the right thing in calling for help. I’m just sorry I couldn’t get there sooner,” he said, biting his lip when it trembled. “And you fought back, Y/N. You fought hard and you won. Do you hear me?” he dipped his head down to be eye level with her. “You won. He’ll never hurt you again. You protected yourself, and I’m so proud of you,” he paused, his voice wobbling with emotion. “I’m proud of you for keeping yourself safe. God, when I saw him on top of you I–” he gritted his teeth, frowning deeply. “I can’t lose you.”

Y/N stared at him. He’d confessed he cared about her earlier that night, but now he seemed like he maybe cared more than he’d let on. “I’m just your assistant,” she said.

Bucky chuckled. “Best assistant I’ve ever had,” he smiled. “But you, you’re…like I said, I care about you.”

Y/N eyed him warily, but she was too exhausted to try to argue or read into it anymore for the night. She sighed and nodded. “I need to sleep,” she whispered, her body feeling like it could collapse at any moment.

“Okay,” Bucky agreed, moving to the top of the bed and turning down the covers, helping her get situated.

“Please stay,” Y/N said, grabbing his wrist.

Bucky’s eyes widened but he nodded. “Okay.”

He sat at the end of the bed as Y/N got comfortable. After she shifted repeatedly she looked at him. “Could you, um…would you please…hold me?” she asked hesitantly.

Bucky immediately nodded. “Yeah,” he said, then climbed up the bed. He settled under the covers and held his arms open to her. Y/N scooted close to him, her head tucked under his chin, resting against his chest, and the moment his arms were wrapped around her protectively she cried again, this time quietly, her body trembling as it tried to relax. “It’s okay, doll, I’ve got you,” he mumbled, kissing the top of her head. “You’re safe. You’re safe here. You can stay as long as you want. I’m right here…” He rambled on for a while, his low voice helping soothe her nerves and lull her to sleep. The last thing she felt was his hands rubbing her back gently, his lips kissing her forehead.

***

Y/N woke up the next morning extremely warm and comfortable. The bed underneath her was…moving? She shifted herself, realizing that the bed she was on was a body. Her head snapped up and looked to see Bucky. He was still asleep, laying on his back with Y/N draped across his side, her head still on his chest, her arm across his waist and her leg hiked up over his groin and legs. A flood of memories rushed in her head, making her shut her eyes tight at the headache it caused. She laid her head back down on his chest, groaning at the soreness in her body. His arm draped across her back that held her against him instinctively tightened and he hummed as his free hand bent up and under his head, making him look relaxed. Y/N couldn’t help but to stare at him. Getting to see Bucky asleep was quite the sight. The nearly perpetual frown he had at work when focusing on cases and handling issues was gone, making him look younger and peaceful.

Y/N reached a hand up and softly scratched at the beard hair on his chin, caressing his cheek and tracing along different parts of his face. She felt like she was skipping a lot of steps, and that this was definitely inappropriate, but couldn’t find it in herself to care. His eyes fluttered as she traced down his nose, and he started to wake up. She tucked herself back into his side quickly, closing her eyes as Bucky started to squirm. He groaned beneath her, stretching as best as he could with her nearly on top of him before she felt his lips on her forehead again. “Y/N,” he grunted, then cleared his throat. “Good morning.” Y/N didn’t want to move. She didn’t answer and his free hand shuffled from underneath his head to reach down and poke her side gently. “Come on, doll, time to wake up,” he said quietly.

She hummed unhappily, shaking her head against his chest. “Five more minutes,” she rasped.

Bucky chuckled, making her shake. “As comfortable as I am, let’s get you fed, huh?” She shook her head again, her arms tightening around him. He shifted himself to face her, wrapping his arms around her in a hug. “Were you touching my face?” he asked, a teasing tone in his voice. Y/N hid her face into his chest to hide her blush. Bucky chuckled again. “Why were you touching my face?”

“I don’t know,” Y/N replied, her voice muffled in his shirt. “You just looked so…peaceful and cozy.”

He hummed, the vibration in his chest warming her face. She finally moved and looked up at him, meeting his tired gaze. “Hi,” he whispered.

“Good morning,” Y/N whispered back with a small smile.

“How are you feeling today?” he asked quietly, reaching a hand up and moving her hair out of her face.

“Hm…tired, and sore,” she groaned. Her stomach growled then, and it made him smile widely.

“And hungry,” he smirked. “Come on.” They both slowly got up, and separated for a few minutes to get cleaned up and ready for the day. He met her at the door to the guest bedroom and led her to the kitchen, where he had her sit at the bar stool at the island while he gathered some food together. “You like waffles?” he asked.

“I love waffles,” Y/N smiled brightly.

While Bucky worked on breakfast Y/N took a look around the kitchen. Since they had come to his house late at night and she had been merely surviving emotionally at the time she hadn’t been able to get a good look at the house. She gazed at the design and layout of the kitchen that was open to the dining room, and just beyond an arched wall she could see into an office, sitting room area. The entire house was a moody, dark academia style, making her smile again. Dark and brooding but with charming aspects, like the man making her waffles.

“I love your house,” she said, catching his attention. “Did you have it designed?”

“I did,” Bucky smiled, plating a waffle for her. “My sister is an interior designer.”

“Your sister?” Y/N asked with raised eyebrows. “How did I not know you have a sister?”

“Just because you’re my personal assistant doesn’t mean I’m gonna tell you everything,” he smirked as he handed her the plate, along with a butter dish and the maple syrup.

“Obviously not,” Y/N smirked back at him. She buttered the waffle and poured the syrup before cutting into it and taking a bite. She sighed happily at the taste, giving Bucky an appreciative nod, making him smile. “So good,” she mumbled around the mouthful.

“Good,” Bucky said, then turned to make some more. He cooked up some eggs and poured her some coffee and juice. He leaned on the island across from her and ate as well, both of them getting their fill until the waffles and eggs were gone. He took the dishes and put them in the dishwasher before turning back to face her again. He stared at her for a minute before licking his lips.

Y/N sighed. She couldn’t keep playing this back and forth, weird sexual tension game anymore. Her emotions were all over the place, and annoyance was winning. “You keep saying ‘I care about you.’ What does that mean?”

Bucky’s eyes widened as he frowned. “It means I care about you. I want to help you, like I said. I’ve seen these things happen before and I couldn’t just let it be–”

“‘I’ve seen these things happen before.’ So you wanted to save me.” She knew she was lashing out, but couldn’t stop herself. “But it’s never happened to you, has it?” Y/N slipped off the stool, rounded the island and came toe to toe with him, Bucky backing up slightly at her voice raising. “You don’t know what it feels like to be afraid every day. You don’t know what it’s like to be stalked, harassed, beaten, raped, broken! So why do you care so much?!” She asked, her eyes burning with more tears falling.

Bucky’s own eyes looked teary as he looked down at her sadly. “My sister was in an abusive relationship,” he said quietly. “He almost killed her. She got away and didn’t want help, but it haunted her. She was a shell of herself. I couldn’t lose her, she’s the only family I have left,” he swallowed harshly. “So I helped her as best as I could. It took her a while, but eventually she got better, and is still healing. I don’t know how it feels. I don’t know what you need. I just want to help,” he said, his lips pressing together firmly.

Y/N digested his words, her mind still feeling slow in processing things. She blinked rapidly as she sniffed. “Fine,” she agreed. Bucky seemed relieved and nodded. “I’m going to get my stuff, then I’ll be out of your hair,” she huffed, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Don’t do that,” Bucky said gruffly back.

“Don’t do what?” Y/N asked.

“Don’t push me away just because I offered you help. Don’t get angry and defensive because someone wants to take care of you,” he replied.

“I never asked for your help,” she said quietly.

“Stop it,” Bucky said, stepping closer to her. “If you didn’t want help you wouldn’t have called me.”

She stared up at him defiantly. He was close to her like that day when she teased him in the office a while ago. Y/N wanted to push him, see how far he was willing to go in this back and forth they’d been having for so long. “I care about you,” kept rattling around in her head as she tried to make sense of it. Yes, he cared. But it felt like something else. Something more simmering underneath the words.

“You care so much,” she sneered, stepping even closer. “Why?”

“Because I’m a good person?” Bucky said incredulously.

She shook her head. “And?”

He looked like he was fighting against himself. “I don’t need another reason. And I don’t need to explain myself to you.”

“Is it because you want something from me?” she ventured. “You help me and I’ll be so eternally grateful I’ll throw myself at you?”

Bucky recoiled. “Stop that.”

“Well that’s what you want, right?” Y/N pushed further. “I saw it that day when Steve and I were teasing you, and it went a little too far. You wanted more,” her eyes flickered to his lips and back to his eyes.

Bucky shut his eyes and shook his head, taking a step back. “Y/N, you just went through something traumatic. You’re lashing out because you don’t know how to handle it right now–”

Y/N said, stepping toward him again. “All I need is a straight answer. You wanted more, yes or no?”

Bucky opened his eyes but couldn’t keep her gaze. “It doesn’t matter what I want,” he said, his jaw ticking when he finished.

“Still didn’t answer my question,” Y/N said, sounding more annoyed. “You wanna help me? Think of this as my first round of therapy. I’m working through some rough feelings right now, Boss. I need an answer!”

“Yes! Okay? Goddammit,” Bucky said, throwing his hands up in frustration. “Yes, I want more with you. But that doesn’t matter. Especially right now. I’m not going to take advantage of a highly emotional moment in your life and try to slip in just to ‘get some,’ that’s not what I want. And it’s insulting to me that you think that of me,” Bucky pointed his finger at her. “Some people really do just care about you, you know that? Some people really just want to help because they care about you, because they like you, they love you!”

Y/N was fully crying again, her arms holding herself even more tightly than before. His raised voice was making her shrink into herself. “No one loves me,” she whispered.

“I do!” Bucky yelled.

Y/N flinched and Bucky’s face crumpled. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Y/N said, taking a step back. “Just please stop yelling.”

Bucky sighed heavily, his hand rubbing his face harshly before he raised his hands in front of himself like he was surrendering. “I’m sorry, Y/N, I didn’t mean to yell,” he said quietly. “Please, I…I’m just trying to help.”

Y/N bit her lip as she tried to control her crying, but instead it just made her choke on a sob that broke through. She wasn’t scared of Bucky. She knew he would never hurt her, but the raised voice and yelling was triggering. “I know, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for questioning you and your motives. I’m sorry,” she tried stepping away but he walked toward her.

“Y/N,” he pleaded. “Don’t run away. Please, I’m sorry,” he reached toward her, leaving his hand outstretched with his palm up as an invitation.

Y/N’s eyes flicked from his hand to his face repeatedly. The dichotomy of wanting to run away and hide versus wanting to be comforted was making her panic. Ultimately she slowly reached out and gave him her hand. Bucky slowly stepped toward her, taking her hand and holding it gently but firmly as he pulled her towards him. She stepped toward him hesitantly, and he moved slowly as he wrapped his arms around her, watching her reactions carefully. He pulled her until their bodies were flush against each other and her arms wrapped behind his back, tucking her face into the crook of his neck. His hand moved to hold the back of her head against him gently, running his fingers through her hair as they breathed deeply, and she matched her breathing to his to calm down. “I do want you,” he whispered in her ear. “I do like you. If I’m honest, I’ve been falling in love with you since the moment I met you.”

Y/N huffed a short laugh against his skin. “I knew it,” she whispered.

“Can you blame me?” Bucky chuckled, nuzzling her hair with his nose.

Y/N smiled. “Thank you, Bucky. I’m sorry I…I don’t know what’s going on with me right now.”

“It’s okay, I understand,” Bucky breathed, squeezing her tighter. He pulled away just enough to look at her.

They stared at each other and she gulped. “Can I have…could we try…one k-kiss?” she asked.

Bucky’s eyes minutely widened, inhaling sharply. “I-I don’t know if I could…stop myself at one,” he confessed.

“That’s okay,” Y/N said.

Bucky’s eyes flickered to her lips and back to her eyes. His hands moved from her back up to her face, cupping her cheeks and angling her head upwards. “You want me?” he asked breathily. Y/N nodded as he leaned forward, angling his head and brushing his lips across hers first, like he was testing the waters of his own sanity. He finally fully pressed his lips on hers and kissed her softly.

Y/N sucked in a breath, kissing him back just as softly. It was just as perfect as she had dreamt it would be, from all those nights she had fallen asleep to the thought of him, while chastising herself for her feelings and denying it. It ended too soon when he pulled away, though not too far as his nose nuzzled her nose. Y/N whimpered at the loss, and he had to shut his eyes tight again. “Fuck, doll, that was a pretty noise,” he groaned. His fingers slipped back into her hair. “More?” he begged.

Y/N nodded and he kissed her again. This one was firmer, heavier, and his grip on her was tighter. Her fingers fisted his shirt, her arms pulling him by the waist impossibly closer to her as she angled her head more and pushed up on her tip-toes to deepen the kiss. Bucky grunted, and before she knew it he was picking her up and setting her on the kitchen counter. The kisses were passionate, Bucky’s tongue sneaking out to lick at her bottom lip and Y/N opening up to him easily. They tasted each other, nipping at each other’s lips, their hands roaming each other’s bodies. Bucky was standing between her spread legs, his hands now kneading her thighs up to her hips as she tasted him and sucked on his tongue.

“Holy shit, doll,” he moaned when she released him. “I just wanna make it clear that I’m not trying to take advantage of you in a fragile state–”

“Just fuck me, Bucky,” Y/N groaned, running her fingers through his hair and pulling him back in for a seering kiss.

“Yeah…yeah okay,” Bucky huffed against her mouth, picking her up and carrying her back to the guest room.

***

When they got to work that next Monday Y/N was greeted with excited smiles and hugs. Apparently word had spread quickly. “Oh! I’m so glad you’re okay!” Kamala said, hugging her tightly.

Steve stepped up afterward, hugging her like she was his little sister. “I’m so glad you’re okay,” he said quietly. “So proud of you.”

Y/N smiled appreciatively at him. “Thank you. Thank you, everybody,” she waved at them all. “I’m fine, really.”

“Now quit distracting my assistant. Fuck off!” Bucky said loudly, and they all went back to work in a hurry, Steve just rolling his eyes and smiling as he walked off to his office. Bucky had his hand on her lower back as he guided her towards his office. Once they were inside he shut the door. “Take a seat, doll,” he said. “Let’s go over the schedule.”

“Alright,” Y/N nodded, getting herself settled and her notebook and phone ready. “And uh, thank you, by the way, for kinda saving me back there.”

“No need to thank me,” Bucky shook his head. “Now listen, I know we’re in a weird spot right now. I want this,” he gestured between the two of them, “to work, but I don’t want you to lose this job on account of that, either. And you’re honestly the best personal assistant I’ve ever had. So, I want work to be work, and home to be home. Does that sound fair?”

“Yes,” she nodded, smiling at how business-like he sounded.

“Great,” he nodded back. “So…the schedule.”

THE END?

#marvel #smut #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #request #anon ask #ask #long oneshot

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fizz-pop-thwip · 7 months ago

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Can Iron man dick riders take 2 seconds to use critical thinking skills. "What if it was your parents" NO ONE IS BLAMING TONY'S REACTION BUT DO YOU SERIOUSLY JUST EXPECT STEVE TO SIT THERE AND LET IT HAPPEN??

He knows Bucky has been tortured and been through fucking hell for 70 YEARS, not to mention that is his best friend, you want him to just stand and fucking watch?? They didn't 'jump tony' tony attacked first and they went as far as they needed to aka disabling Tony's weapon, that being his suit.

It makes me think that people haven't watched CATWS BC Bucky is quite literally as innocent as they can get, he was stripped of all his autonomy. He had no choice over his actions, do I need to define mind control for some people?? Seriously.

I feel like I need to reiterate like 10 times over, No one is blaming Tony but you cannot possibly blame Steve for protecting Bucky because Bucky is a victim.

#it makes me so frustrated bc how is it difficult to understand.#cacw #steve rogers #bucky barnes #this isnt a tony hate post its a steve hater hate post #tony stark #marvel #captain america civil war #team cap #i cannot believe this is still a debate 6 years later 💀

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vee-nyx · 7 months ago

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to celebrate 8 years since civil war release, let’s review all the ways tony stark was an absolute loser and actually the reason thanos won in infinity war:

created an omnicidal A.I. that the rest of the team warned him against creating

decided that the entire team needed to become government puppets because he felt guilty for creating said A.I. that, once again, NO ONE SUPPORTED HIM IN MAKING

(also the reason bucky was forced back into the fight bc tony caused sokovia and thus caused zemo’s need for revenge but i digress on that pt)

when members of the team who can’t disconnect from their abilities raised concerns about how the accords dehumanized them, he had them arrested or locked them in his tower

bribed (yes, bribed) a child into fighting on his side because he knew he was outmatched

instructed vision to shoot sam out of the sky and then shot sam point-blank when he avoided the blast that would’ve left him severely injured AND LANDED TO HELP THE PERSON IT HIT

wanda on the raft. this is its own point. he let her be restrained and collared like a fucking DOG as if he hadn’t already done enough damage in her life (killing her parents & brother)

proceeded to break the accords THAT HE HELPED WRITE to chase cap across the globe because he felt left out of the action

blamed a brainwashed pow for BEING FORCED to kill the starks AGAINST HIS WILL and proceeded to BLOW HIS ARM OFF and ATTEMPT TO KILL HIM DESPITE KNOWING THAT NONE OF IT WAS HIS CHOICE

mocked natasha’s trauma because she dared to disagree with his methods (he is, in fact, incapable of letting go of his ego for one goddamn second)

even after receiving an apology, refused to contact cap for three years despite KNOWING about the threat of thanos

in conclusion,

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drabbles-mc · 9 months ago

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Out of Practice

Bucky Barnes x F!Reader

For the Alternate June-iverse prompt: milf/dilf

Warnings: 18+, language, alcohol, steamy things, reader is a mom, bucky hasn't dated in like 70 years

Word Count: 7.7k

A/N: I had no idea what I was going to do for this prompt for the longest time but then tonight this all fell outta me in one sitting lmao. enjoy some cameos from Sam and Tony! And thanks again to @buckybarnesevents and @rookthorne for putting this event together 💖

MCU Taglist: @garbinge @artemiseamoon (If you want to be added to any of my taglists, please let me know!)

Bucky was standing at the bottom of the walkway that led to the main doors of the school. Despite the warmth that came from the late spring weather, he still had on his leather jacket and gloves. He was far from the only person standing out and waiting for the final bell to ring, but he still felt like he stood out. No matter how much time went by that was a feeling he had yet to shake.

He pried his eyes off the cracked concrete beneath his boots when the bell rang, shortly followed by the front doors of the school being pushed open by dozens upon dozens of kids desperate to get out and head home. Many of them were sprinting off towards the buses, but some were making a direct line right where Bucky was standing with the rest of the parents and other family members. He kept his eyes peeled, but he still didn’t see who he was looking for.

A couple minutes ticked by and for a moment he wondered if he had shown up at the wrong place, or on the wrong day. He was about to take his phone out of his pocket when the front door opened up again. He breathed out a sigh of relief when he saw Morgan walking out, jacket tied around her waist and backpack settled on her shoulders. She was looking up at the woman next to her, the two of them talking as the woman balanced a child who looked like she was just barely old enough to be in kindergarten on her hip.

When Morgan looked away, she immediately saw Bucky. A smile broke out across her face as she threw a hand up to wave, an expression and gesture that he returned. He took a few steps so that he met her right where the walkways met. She walked right up to him, holding both hands out in closed fists. Bucky’s grin widened slightly as he held his fists out as well, tapping their knuckles together before the both pulled their hands back, making an exploding sound and gesture as they did.

Once they completed their ritual, Bucky turned his attention to you. You were smiling at the sight of the two of them, but he could see the questioning look still lingering in your eyes. “You must be Uncle Bucky, then?” you asked, although the answer seemed fairly obvious.

He chuckled, looking briefly at Morgan before he returned his attention back to you. “Yeah, but just Bucky is fine.”

He held out his hand for you to shake, and you did so carefully so as not to disturb the sleeping child on your hip as you gave him your name in return. “Hope you don’t mind me bringing her out.” You shifted your weight from one foot to the other. “Just like to make sure that everything’s alright when someone new is picking up one of my students.”

“I tried to tell her you weren’t new,” Morgan interjected, her sarcasm making her sound so much like her father despite only being nine years old.

You shook your head with a knowing smile. “New to me, then,” you corrected.

“It’s fine,” Bucky said with a small shake of his head. “I get it.”

“I appreciate that.” You looked back and forth between the two of them, an odd but fitting pair. “I’ll let you two go. It was nice to meet you, Bucky.” You shifted your gaze to the young girl standing beside him. “And I will see you on Monday, Miss Morgan.”

Morgan was already saying goodbye and turning to head off towards Bucky’s care by the time the words left your mouth. Bucky, however, was still staring at you, looking at the way you were balancing the little girl on one hip while you had her backpack on the opposite shoulder, your own bag hanging in the crook of your arm. He knew that this was probably far from the first time you left the school building with your hands full but he still felt like it was wrong to not at least offer to help.

“Do you need help with—”

“I’ve got it,” you reassured him with a smile, taking a step towards the parking lot, “but thank you.”

He didn’t try to offer again, taking your word for what it was worth. Turning, he easily collapsed the distance between himself and Morgan in one stride, and the two of them started walking off towards his car. You heard the two of them talking as they walked away. Or, rather, you heard Morgan talking about her day and Bucky chiming in with a word of acknowledgment. You cast a couple brief looks at them as you walked over to your car, smiling at the sight of them.

You returned your focus to the task at hand as you tried to get your daughter into her booster seat in the back of your car. You weren’t too worried, since she had luckily been a heavy sleeper ever since she was born, but you still tried to be extra careful. You were clicking her seatbelt into place when you heard Bucky’s car engine rumbling to life.

You caught a glimpse through your own car’s windshield as they drove by, Morgan sitting behind the empty passenger seat of Bucky’s car. They were out of you line of sight as quickly as they’d entered it. When they were gone again you set both your bag and your daughter’s on the floor by her feet.

~*~

“Ew, no,” Morgan said as she shook her head, her and Bucky looking at each other through the rearview mirror, “he’s gross. All the boys in my grade are.”

Bucky laughed, nodding. “Your dad will be happy to hear that.”

“I don’t even want a boyfriend.”

Bucky fought to the urge to give his knee-jerk response which would’ve been, “Well, yeah, you’re fucking nine.” Instead, he asked, “You tell him that?”

“Yeah.” She shrugged. “He went and asked Chrissy instead.”

“Worked out for you,” Bucky said, throwing his directional on before turning onto the main road away from the school. “You don’t need a boyfriend—you’re fine.”

“Dad says that you need a girlfriend.”

Bucky nearly choking on the breath he was pulling in. His eyes drifted from the road and back to the mirror to look at her. “What?”

“What?” she parroted back to him, blissfully unaware of why he reacted that way. “That’s what he said.”

Bucky was shaking his head, gaze fixed back on the road once more. “Yeah? Well your dad’s a—”

“Have you ever had a girlfriend?” she asked.

Bucky chuckled, a genuine sound. “Ever? Yeah.”

“This century?”

His eyebrows raised, surprised but also not. “You gotta stop listening to your dad all the time.”

A wide grin blossomed across her face. “But have you?”

He shook his head. “I thought we were cool,” he said sarcastically.

Morgan laughed hard enough at that to usher them into another topic of conversation with the rest of the drive home. Bucky went the long way, swinging through McDonald’s on the way since he was told that was fine this time around. It killed a little more time anyway, which was really what he needed. The only reason that he has the one enlisted to go and pick Morgan up in the first place was because Tony and Pepper were both running late with work. Not terribly so, but late enough that they didn’t want to ask her teacher to stay and wait.

Even with the extra stop planned in, and the most scenic route as possible taken, it still didn’t take them very long to get home. Before either of them could think much of it Bucky was rolling into Tony and Pepper’s driveway.

Bucky had just put the car in park when Morgan jumped out of the car, backpack strap in one hand and happy meal in the other. Bucky shook his head at her, laughing as he got out of the car much slower than she had. He finally felt comfortable enough to take off his gloves, tucking them into the back pocket of his jeans as he walked towards Tony’s porch.

Morgan had left the door opened behind her, so Bucky walked through and closed it as he did. When he looked around the room he saw that Morgan had already made her way over to her father and gotten swept off the ground in a hug.

As Tony was setting her back down on the floor, he asked, “You got some extra fries for me, right?”

Morgan laughed. “No way.”

Tony faked deep offense at her response. “It’s like I don’t even know you anymore.”

Bucky piped in. “I didn’t get you any either, for the record.”

Tony smirked. “That much I expected.”

Morgan looked around the room a little more, and when she didn’t see Pepper, she asked, “Where’s Mom?”

Tony gestured deeper into the house. “She’s out back.”

Morgan tossed both her backpack and her McDonald’s box of food onto the counter. “I’m gonna go say hi!” She pointed at Tony. “Don’t eat my fries.” She turned and pointed at Bucky. “Don’t let him eat my fries.”

Bucky gave a small salute. “Yes ma’am.”

When Morgan had scampered out of the room, Tony’s full attention shifted to Bucky. “Thanks for picking her up—I know it was short-notice.”

Bucky shrugged. “It’s fine.”

“Went okay?”

He nodded. “Teacher came out to make sure I wasn’t some kidnapper, but yeah, it went okay.”

Tony chuckled as he opened the fridge. “Figured she would.” He grabbed a beer for himself and offered one to Bucky, when he declined he shrugged with a suit yourself expression and let the door fall shut.

“Why’s your nine-year-old telling me I need to get a girlfriend?” Bucky asked as he watched Tony pop the cap off the bottle.

Tony didn’t miss a beat. “My guess is because you need to get a girlfriend.”

“Tony—”

“You met her teacher then, right?” Tony shrugged and took a sip of his beer. “She’s single. And cu—”

Bucky’s tone shifted drastically as he repeated himself. “Tony.”

The hand that wasn’t holding the beer bottle was held up in mock surrender. “I’m just saying.”

“That why you sent me to pick her up? Is Happy even busy?”

Tony laughed. “Like Happy would ever be too busy to get Morgan from school.”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “Oh my fuc—”

“Watch it.” Tony lifted the hand he was holding the bottle with, pointing accusingly at him. “There are little ears in the house.”

Bucky sucked in a deep breath. “I don’t need you playing matchmaker.” He leaned forward, bracing his forearms against the smooth dark stone-top of the island. “And I definitely don’t need you roping in your nine-year-old to help.”

“I actually didn’t tell her to say anything to you.”

“I don’t need you talking to her about my love life at all.”

“I was talking to Pepper about it. But hey,” he took another sip, “little ears hear everything.”

He watched as Bucky chuckled in disbelief. Tony knew that it wasn’t his place to say or do anything, that out of everyone he was probably close to the bottom of the list when it came to people who had the right to give dating advice. Even with that being the case, though, Tony had been watching Bucky muddle through and get along without ever really learning to get close to anyone since everything happened with Steve. He was gone now, and while Bucky might’ve accepted that, he still hadn’t really made any moves to let new people in. A girlfriend wouldn’t solve all of those issues, as Pepper had swiftly told him. But it probably also wouldn’t hurt, as Tony had told her in response.

“Gonna make me go to parent-teacher night next?” Bucky asked, his tone light enough to let Tony know that it wasn’t going to turn into an argument for the time being.

“Don’t be ridiculous—you’re not ready for anything more than an open house.”

He scoffed out a laugh. “Thanks.”

They both had plenty more comments to make about the topic but they let it drop as Morgan re-entered the room, Pepper in tow right behind her. Bucky and Tony exchanged a knowing look, one that confirmed that their conversation as on hold for now. Pepper caught it, but knew enough to know not to ask. Instead, she started a new conversation by thanking Bucky for picking Morgan up. He stayed long enough to make a little small talk before excusing himself, making sure to give Morgan another double fist-bump before heading for the door.

“I’ll walk you out,” Tony said, leaving his half-empty beer bottle on the counter.

Bucky knew exactly what Tony was doing, but didn’t say anything. The two of them slipped out the door, and Tony followed him down off the porch and all the way to his car.

When he realized that Bucky wasn’t going to say anything about any of it, he spoke up himself. “I could probably get her number for you.”

“Don’t.”

“Why not? You don’t think she’s—”

“That has nothing to do with it and you know it,” Bucky cut him off. “Just leave it alone, Tony.”

“Mmm.” He shook his head. “Don’t think I can do that. Matter of national security at this point—you’re left unattended an awful lot.”

“And you think I need an elementary teacher to keep me company?”

“She knows how to wrangle kids and keep ‘em in line—sounds perfect for you.”

“Don’t say anything to her.”

Tony stared at Bucky for a long, hard minute. “Fine.”

Bucky didn’t believe it for a second but be also knew that continuing to argue about it wasn’t going to fix anything either. “Thanks.”

They exchanged a quick handshake and a brief goodbye, and soon enough, Bucky was on his way. The drive back to his apartment felt longer than usual, his thoughts wandering in the silence of the car since he didn’t make any move to turn the radio on. He thought about you, not that he would ever give Tony the satisfaction of knowing that, the way you smiled as you balanced your daughter on your hip. He thought about the apparent ease there was between you and Morgan. He thought about your dress and the way it fell just above your knees, the way the bright colors looked so nice and seemed so fitting.

Then he shook his head to dispel the thoughts. Tony was just in his head now, having him overthink about a woman he’d met for all of two minutes. The likelihood of him seeing you again wasn’t very high, not unless Tony started asking him to play chauffer for Morgan a lot more often, and somehow he didn’t really see that happening.

When he walked into his apartment, Bucky was immediately greeted by Alpine running up and rubbing against his legs. He chuckled, crouching down so that he could give him a light scratch behind his ears. Part of it was because Alpine was happy to have his owner home, Bucky was sure. But the other part was about the fact that it was definitely past Alpine’s usual dinnertime. Bucky understood all of that.

“I know,” his metal fingers can down Alpine’s spine, causing him to arch and purr, “I’m late.”

The next few minutes was just Bucky hanging up his jacket, giving Alpine his dinner, and then pulling something out of the freezer to cook for his own dinner as well. While he was waiting for the oven to finish pre-heating, the only sound that could be heard was Alpine crunching on his kibble as he stood above his bowl. Bucky watched him for a moment, a small smile on his face at the simplicity of the life he had now. Something that for a long time he didn’t think he would ever have.

It was a good life. It was quieter now than it had been for a long time—he was almost used to it. But maybe Tony was right, not that Bucky would ever tell him as much in so many words, but there might’ve been something to what Tony had been trying to tell him. A truth that was simpler to ignore because continuing on as he had been required far less work than trying to get to know someone, trying to let someone get to know him.

He pulled his phone out, tempted to search your name just to see what would pop up, what he would be able to learn about you. Then he stopped himself, shaking his head to try and dispel the thoughts. What good would it do? Why was he thinking like you were someone he knew already? Or like you were someone that already knew him? For all he knew, you’d forgotten him already. Hell, for all he knew you had no desire to get to know anyone, let alone someone like him. The beeping of his oven saved him from going down that spiral any further.

~*~

Sam was sitting on the stool to Bucky’s left. The music in the bar was loud, but not so much so that they had to shout to talk to each other. But once Bucky processed the sentence that Sam had just spoken to him, he instantly wished that the music was loud enough so that he couldn’t hear the other man at all.

Bucky pulled a long drink from the beer bottle in his hand, gloved fingers wrapped tightly around the neck of it. “Can’t believe he got you in on this shit too.”

Sam shrugged, unfazed by Bucky’s blatant annoyance. “I’m just sayin’, I think the guy might have a point.”

“Since when do you agree with Stark?”

Sam laughed. “I’ll agree with anybody if I think they’re right!” He paused, studied the look on Bucky’s face and then added on with a laugh, “Well, yeah, not you. But other people.”

Bucky tried to keep his annoyed expression but then chuckled. “Fuck you.”

Sam wasn’t going to let the conversation get derailed. “Alright, so you don’t like the girl he was telling you about, so why don’t you—”

“I didn’t say—”

“They got apps for that now. Oh, sorry,” Sam held up his hand in a pausing motion, “Apps are things that you can put on your pho—”

Bucky’s brows knit together. “I know what apps are.”

Sam allowed himself a minute to laugh at his own joke before saying, “So it’s not the girl. Then, what? Afraid you left all your game back in the forties?”

He shook his head, eyes suddenly glued down to his beer bottle. “Sure, yeah. Something like that.”

“Want my advice?”

“No.”

Sam gave it anyway. “Get over it.” He ignored the increasingly annoyed look on Bucky’s face. “Go buy a girl a drink. Ask her for her number. Use whatever corny line you used back in the nineteen hundreds the last time you had to pretend to have some game.”

Bucky didn’t want to laugh but he couldn’t stop himself. Sam might’ve been oversimplifying but Bucky was also vaguely aware of the fact that he was overcomplicating things for himself. “I’ll think about it. But,” he paused to point at Sam accusingly while he grabbed a sip of his beer, “I didn’t have to pretend to have game. I had it—have. I have it.”

Sam raised his eyebrows. “Riiiight.”

The topic dropped, and they moved onto talking about other things. There were frequent pauses in the conversation, both of them turning to look at people coming into the bar. Neither of them ever thought they would fully break that habit, no matter how often they went out into the world as civilians.

The door let out a quiet chime, and Bucky’s head instinctively snapped in the direction to see who was coming in. His eyes widened and he stopped himself in the middle of the sentence that he was saying to Sam. There was no brain to mouth filter as he let out a quiet, “Shit.”

Sam’s face contorted in confusion as he turned to see what it was that had Bucky reacting that way. He looked over, his confusion immediately shifting into a smug grin when he saw you standing in the doorway. Bucky hadn’t even given Sam a description of what you looked like, but he could tell from Bucky’s reaction that there was no way that you could possibly be anyone else.

“Talk about good timing,” Sam joked.

Bucky was still staring at you, not that you’d noticed, as he spoke to Sam. “Shut up.”

“Now’s the time.”

He fought the urge to shove him off the stool. “I said shut up.”

You were only a couple steps inside the bar, you phone clutched tightly in one hand as you looked around the semi-tight space. The focused furrow of your brow said that you were looking for someone. The tight black jeans and lacy grey top you were wearing said that you were probably looking for your date. There were five million reasons Bucky felt his mouth go dry and none of them were doing him any good.

He saw the rise and fall of your shoulders as you let out a sigh. You typed on your phone for a moment before making your way over to the bar, carefully weaving your way through the clusters of other patrons. The closer you got, the more Bucky hoped that the floor would open up and swallow him whole. You were so focused on getting to the bar and snagging a rare empty seat, that you didn’t even notice that the seat was next to him until after you’d ordered your drink. You wouldn’t have looked in his direction at all if you hadn’t heard someone laughing.

When you turned, the first thing you saw was Bucky, the familiar face and leather jacket. The next thing you noticed was the man on the other side of him, the source of said laughter. You tilted your head as your eyes made their way back to Bucky. You allowed yourself a laugh of your own. “Bucky?”

He nodded, clearing his throat. “H-hey. Yeah, hi.”

“So funny seeing you here!” You paused, looking back and forth between him and the man next to him. “How are you?”

He nodded again, pulling the words up one by one. “Good. I’m good. You?”

“I’m, um,” you chuckled awkwardly, “I’m alright, I think? Supposed to be meeting someone here but,” you glanced around, “I don’t see them yet.”

The man on the other side of Bucky leaned across him and held his hand out. “I’m Sam, by the way.” He flashed you a charming grin. “Not the person you were looking for, but figured I’d introduce myself anyway since this guy wasn’t going to.”

You laughed as you told him your name. “Nice to meet you, Sam.”

The three of you chit-chatted, and you tried not to think too much about the way that Bucky was looking at you. You were putting too much thought into it, you were certain. Maybe you were just projecting, taking all the growing disappointment you were feeling about your supposed “date” still not being there and channeling it into the way that Bucky seemed to be so attentively listening to you.

Taking another sip from the straw in your drink, you checked the time on your phone one more time. Letting out a deep sigh, you looked over at Bucky, and Sam too. “I’m glad I ran into you two tonight, because from the looks of it the person that I came out to see is not showing up.” You shoved your phone back into the pocket of your jeans with a shake of your head.

“He’s an idiot,” Sam chimed in without hesitation.

You laughed and nodded. “I appreciate the sentiment.” You finished off your drink and you didn’t try to dissuade the bartender who was grabbing your glass and heading off to make you another. Looking back at the two of them, you said, “My friends were the ones who convinced me to get on those stupid dating apps anyway.” You shook your head. “Lotta good it did, huh?”

Bucky nodded, shooting a pointed look at Sam as he said, “Yeah, I know the feeling.”

Sam was laughing, but Bucky noticed the way that he was moving to throw some cash down on the bar. He gathered up his jacket as he got off the stool. “Well, not to be the bearer of more bad news, but I gotta take off.” He clapped Bucky on the shoulders as he walked by. “But you two crazy kids stay out and have some fun. It was very nice to meet you.” He flashed the two of you another grin. “Call if you need bail money. Not me, but, you know, call somebody.”

You laughed as you and Bucky each said goodbye to him. The two of you watched him as he practically skipped out of the bar and out onto the street. Bucky was caught between wishing he could chase Sam down and tackle him, and wishing he could skip right out the door alongside him. There was no buffer between the two of you anymore, and Bucky felt so strangely exposed.

“Sorry about your date,” Bucky finally offered up.

You smiled good-naturedly. “I’m not that heartbroken over it,” you said honestly as the bartender set your fresh drink down in front of you. “My expectations were pretty low, but, you know,” you took a sip, “not so low that I assumed he wasn’t gonna be here.”

Bucky chuckled. “That’s fair.”

“Honestly, I’m just more pissed off that I wasted one of my few free weekend evenings on some guy who didn’t even bother texting me to cancel.”

“Few?”

You smiled as you said, “My daughter. Every other week she’s with her dad. I miss her when she’s gone, so I try to stay busy. Usually with friends, but every now and then it’s some pipe-dream of a date.” You took another sip. “They usually do show up, though, at the risk of making myself sound horrible desperate,” you joked.

Bucky laughed. “I don’t think you have to worry about that.”

Your smile softened a touch, but it was still there. “Well, thank you for that at least.”

You had every intention of finishing off your drink, paying your tab, and heading right home. You weren’t typically one for staying out all hours in a bar or a club somewhere, even when you were out with your friends. And, as nice as it was that you had a chance run-in with Bucky when everything else seemed to be going wrong, you were still ready to turn it in and go home. Back to your pajamas and fuzzy blankets.

That’s not what happened, however, despite your best intentions. Somewhere along the way you switched from cocktails to soda just for the sake of being able to stay longer without getting too much of a buzz as you talked to Bucky. He wasn’t exactly a chatterbox, per se, and you hadn’t really expected him to be. The two of you managed to keep up a good pace of back and forth regardless of that. He did a little more listening than he did talking but it didn’t seem to bother him. It also made you realize that even though you had your friends, and your fellow teachers at school, there weren’t a whole lot of times when you went out to socialize with other adults. It also didn’t hurt that Bucky was so nice to look at, that he seemed to be just as interested in looking right back at you.

You’d both lost track of time as you sat there, and when you were both finally making your way towards the door of the bar, it was much later than either of you had bargained for. The two of you walked, and Bucky pulled the door open for you. The two of you were mid-conversation when you landed back out on the sidewalk. It was only then that you realized you probably weren’t going to be heading in the same direction.

Bucky watched as you motioned back over your shoulder, the opposite direction from the way he was heading. “I’m parked this way, but, it was really good seeing you. What are the chances, right?” You laughed lightly.

He smiled, nodded. “Yeah. It was, um,” he could feel the words that he wanted to say resting on the tip of his tongue and he was conflicted about whether or not he wanted to actually say them, “it was good to see you again.” He paused, hating every bit of hesitation that he was feeling. “Do you, um, I was wondering,” he was reaching for the pocket of his jacket for his phone as he fumbled his way through the question, “I mean on your next free weekend…”

You felt your face warm as he continued on. You knew where the line of questioning was going, and part of you knew that maybe you should put him out of his misery. But it was sweet, and you were enjoying that. Finally, you nodded. “That’d be nice.”

He let out a sigh of relief as he took his phone out. “Great. Okay, yeah. I’ll…I’ll call you. You know,” he managed a smile with a little more ease, “save you from all the apps.”

You laughed as you typed your name and number in. “You’re a lifesaver.”

In the back of his mind he knew that he should be making some sort of move now. Walk you to your car, give you a hug, something. But if asking for your number was as difficult as it had proven itself to be, he didn’t know what it was going to be like trying to manage anything else. So he took the win, and bid you goodnight.

Over the course of the next couple days, he was caught between wanting to tell both Tony and Sam separately that he’d gotten your number. He thought maybe it would help get them off his back. What he didn’t want, though, was for them to just get on his case about a whole new slew of things. He also didn’t want to give them the satisfaction of knowing that they’d been right.

So, instead of reaching out to either of them, he texted you instead. It was casual at first, just brief messages here and there. Texting wasn’t his favorite way to stay in touch with people, but he at least recognized that it was what people did now.

He called you once, when he wanted to actually try and make plans to see you. That conversation wasn’t one that he wanted to have over text, and he told you as much. You also found that to be sweet as well. It wasn’t a long conversation, one taking place while you made dinner and your daughter was busy with her toys in the living room. But the two of you settled on a date, a time, and that he would come by your place to pick you up. You couldn’t remember the last time you smiled so much while making pasta.

~*~

“Tony is never gonna let you hear the end of this when he finds out,” Sam said as he sat down at Bucky’s kitchen counter.

“Yeah, I know,” Bucky grabbed drinks out of his fridge. “That’s why I haven’t said anything to him about it.”

“Nothing?!”

“No!” Bucky said, breaking down into laughter after a moment. “You gonna tell him?”

“What, you think that we’re texting about you all the time?” Sam shook his head. “Get over yourself.”

Bucky was about to come back with something snarky as per usual when his phone chimed on the counter. Sam looked, too nosey to stop himself. The grin that spread across his face when he saw your name on the screen. At the look on Sam’s face, Bucky’s instinct was to reach and flip the phone over, but he stopped himself. Instead, he grabbed his phone and messaged you back before setting it down.

“You wanna call me while you’re getting ready?” Sam joked. “I’ll help you pick out an outfit. Tell you how to do your hair.”

Bucky chuckled. “Fuck you.”

~*~

He didn’t call Sam before the date. He also hadn’t heard anything from Tony which led him to believe that Sam had been kind enough to keep his mouth shut. That was all well and good, but he wished that it did anything to soothe the nerves that he was feeling as he stood outside your door.

He felt like an awkward sixteen-year-old again as he stood on your front step. He rang the doorbell, flowers clutched tightly in his hand as he waited. He’d spoken to you earlier, and you had seemed excited about it all still. That gave him hope. But again, it still wasn’t enough to eradicate the lingering feelings of anxiety he had.

Another few seconds passed by and then you pulled open the door. You were smiling at him as you were trying to do the latch on your necklace. “Hey! Sorry, I still have to get my shoes on and stuff. Please,” you stepped back and nodded for him to step inside, “come in. I’ll be ready in like, two minutes.”

He smiled as he somewhat nervously followed your instructions, stepping just past the threshold of your house. “Take your time,” he said calmly as he shut the door behind him.

He looked around while you finished putting on your jewelry and went to grab your shoes. He wasn’t sure what he had been picturing your house looking like, but what he saw felt fitting. It was tidy considering how young your daughter was. There were some toys scattered about in patches, framed photos on the walls and drawings tacked onto the fridge by magnets. It was a home in a way that none of Bucky’s places since he came back had ever been.

“Okay,” you said as you reappeared, smoothing out your blouse, “I’m ready. Sor—” you stopped short when you finally noticed the bouquet of flowers in his hand. The smile on your face was wide enough to make your cheeks hurt. “Those are beautiful.”

Bucky’s eyes widened for a moment, like he’d forgotten that he had them. He held them out to you. “Just figured, you know…”

You smiled as you took them, flitting off to the kitchen so that you could put them in a vase with water. “Thank you.”

As the two of you drove, you could feel him slowly starting to relax. The two of you talked, and you could see the way that his grip on the steering wheel started to become less vice-like. There was something refreshing in the way that he opened the car door for you, and the door to the diner that the two of you had agreed on. He sat down across from you in the booth and you noticed the way that he still had his gloves on as he looked through the menu. You wanted to ask but you didn’t—if he wanted to say something about it you had a feeling that he would.

The conversation felt easy, the same way it had been that night at the bar. The only difference now was the feeling in the air. There was a different kind of tension now that hadn’t been there before. Sure, you’d been attracted to him even then, but that hadn’t been a date. Not like this.

Every now and then if one of you shifted in your seat and your feet or legs would brush. Neither of you said anything about it, but you could feel the upward curl of your own lips as it happened, the occasional pink flush of Bucky’s cheeks. Sometimes it’d make him stumble in his sentence and you’d do him the courtesy of not commenting on it.

The two of you were splitting a piece of pie for dessert, something you insisted on because you knew the woman who baked them for the diner. It wasn’t as though Bucky put up any great fight about it. The closer the two of you got to finishing it, the more you engaged in low-stakes warfare, dueling with your forks over the pieces with the best crust-to-filling ratio.

“You can have the last bite,” you conceded with a laugh, leaning back in the booth.

“Oh, come on,” he joked, “it doesn’t feel good to win by forfeit.”

You laughed, warmth blossoming up your neck and across your face. “It’s not forfeit. Think of it as, I don’t know,” you drummed your fingers against the tabletop, “me being nice since it was your first time here.” You paused, studying the amused look on his face. “That better?”

He shrugged, a smirk on his face. “Little bit.”

The two of you walked back out to his car, and you found yourself walking much closer to his side than you had been on the way in. Your arm brushed against his as the two of you walked, and you found yourself about half a step away from leaning into his side.

He reached to open the car door for you, but before he could you leaned back against it so that you were facing him. You let one arm hang by your side, with the other you brought your palm so that it rested against his chest, pads of your fingertips pressing lightly against the leather.

Bucky almost pulled away out of reflex, but he didn’t. “Yes?”

You shook your head, still smiling. “Nothing, nothing.” You let your hand drop, the pads of your fingers dragging for a moment before your arm was back at your side once more. You moved just enough so that he could open the door again for you. “Thank you.”

Bucky walked you up to the door of your house, and he felt like his heart was beating clean up into the back of his throat. He didn’t remember dating being this nerve-wracking before. You seemed perfectly unfazed, though as you sauntered up and slipped your key into the lock.

“You wanna come in?” you offered as you opened the door. “Have a drink?”

It took more effort to swallow than it should have. “Oh. Yeah, sure.”

You chuckled. “If you don’t want to—”

“I do,” he reassured, his voice earnest.

Your smiled grew. “Okay.” You stepped and waved him in with you. “C’mon.” You noticed the way that he still had his jacket and gloves on when you came back out of the kitchen with a bottle in each hand. You handed one over to him. “Nothing fancy, but it’s also usually just me drinking them, so…”

He chuckled and shook his head. “It’s fine.”

There were a few beats of silence, each of you sipping out of your bottles before you said, “You don’t do this a lot, do you?”

His eyes widened for a moment, slight panic. “What?”

Your smile was warm as you gestured with your hand that held the bottle. “This. Dates. Not…not your thing, is it?”

He held the bottle between both his hands. “I’m…out of practice, yeah.” He cleared his throat. “That noticeable?”

You shook your head. “Not really. You just seemed, I don’t know, a little nervous. And I don’t know why a guy who looks like you would have any reason to be nervous on a date other than…”

“Other than I don’t go on them,” he finished with a soft laugh.

Your face heated up as you smiled. “Kinda.”

“How’d I do?” he asked, mostly joking.

You stepped in closer to him, noticing a different kind of tension in his body. “You’re doing great.”

He huffed out a laugh but it was much softer than he intended, betraying more of his real feelings than he bargained for. “This part?” He made a small gesture between you. “This part I’m really,” he forced out a puff of air through his teeth, “yeah.”

There was a flutter of butterflies in your stomach, something you hadn’t felt in a long time. “Want some help?”

He laughed but he didn’t say no, didn’t move away. He swallowed hard as you took the bottle from his hand and set them both on the coffee table in your living room. He was fighting hard to say something—ideally something smooth but at this point he would’ve settled for just about anything. Within seconds you were standing close to him again, bodies a breath away from being pressed flush against each other. Your hands rested on his chest for a moment, and you waited to see if he would change his mind and pull away—you were giving him the chance. But then you felt his hands tentatively land on your hips and you smiled, your body easing against his. You brought one hand up to the side of his face, thumb caressing his cheekbone.

“Not so bad,” you asked softly, “right?”

He shook his head, finally forcing out a quiet, “No, it’s not.”

You smiled and leaned in, lightly pressing your lips to his. It was delicate, fleeting—you were pulling away as quickly as you’d leaned in. The sliver of space left between your lips and his was the silent ask for him to let you know if this was the end of the night or not. He could pull away from you, no harm no foul, or he could lean in and kiss you again and figure it out from there.

It felt like you were both holding your breath for a moment, faces just too close to be able to get a good look in each other’s eyes. You were about to pull back to really look at him when he leaned in and kissed you, more conviction than the quick gesture from before. You readily gave into him, hand sliding from his cheek to the back of his head to keep him pulled to you. As his lips moved against yours, one of his hands slid so that it was resting at the center of the small of your back.

The two of you stayed like that in the middle of your living room, all locking lips and wandering hands. You would’ve let the entire night fall away spent just like that and been more than fine with it. When the two of you finally came back up for air, when Bucky pulled away from you enough to really look into your eyes, you saw that more than anything he was surprised. Maybe it was at you, maybe it was at himself, but regardless it was there. Underneath that, though, you could see that there was something more. His hand that wasn’t on the small of your back came up to cup your chin, the leather of his gloves smooth to the touch against your skin. He tilted your chin just slightly and then your lips were back on his again.

Out of instinct you tugged down the zipper of his jacket. Your hands came up to his shoulders, getting ready to push his jacket down off of them. It was only then that he pulled away from you again, breathless as he desperately searched your face.

“What?” you asked gently, pausing your movements.

“Nothing, nothing. I,” he pressed his lips into a thin line for a moment. “I wasn’t expecting…I just…”

“If it’s too much,” you said, taking a small step back, “we can—”

“No,” he stopped you short, shaking his head. “It’s not that. I just…” He took a breath. “Do you know? Who I am?”

You chuckled. “You’re friends with Iron Man and Falcon. I,” you shrugged, “I connected some dots along the way.”

He laughed, a sound of relief. “A lot of people don’t…you know…”

“A lot of people don’t have people from The Avengers dropping off school snacks once a week.” You paused and let both of you laugh. Allowing your tone to get a little more serious, you said, “I know, Bucky,” you moved once more to push his jacket down off his shoulders, “and it’s okay.”

He allowed you to do it, allowed his jacket to drop to the floor. Even with the long-sleeve shirt that he had on underneath, you could see the difference between his arms. You brought your hands to his, helping him pull the gloves off next. He was holding his breath—you could tell. When his gloves were off you ran your fingers along each of his palms, skin and metal, with equal delicate care.

When you looked into his eyes again you saw the way he was looking at you—bewildered, eager. You brought one hand back to his face again, urging him back towards you. It was a cue that he gladly took, kissing you with fervor. His hands were on your sides, and when he felt the way your other hand was running up his arm, he couldn’t stop himself, from letting his hands slip beneath the fabric of your shirt.

It’d been so long, he realized as his hands roamed your sides and back, since he’d last felt someone like this. When your fingers slid underneath the collar of his shirt, splaying across what they could reach where the nape of his neck turned stretched into his shoulders, he also realized that it’d been a long time since he’d let someone feel him like this too.

All the nerves, the tension of the night, it all started to melt away as he felt you reaching for the bottom hem of his shirt to pull off over his head. He didn’t want to stop you, and he knew that that meant something. Maybe they’d all been right—maybe there was something to letting someone else in again. As he felt the warmth of your palms against his skin, he could only hope that the rest of it felt this good too.

#connect4au #alternate juneiverse #marvel #mcu #marvel fanfiction #mcu fanfiction #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes imagine #x reader #x reader fic #bucky barnes event #my writing #fanfiction #drabblesmc

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adrixivy · 1 month ago

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Imagine Nick Fury being stressed the fuck out because all the Avengers are atleast scared of one or two, if not, all modes of transport. We don’t think about how much trauma this heroes actually have honestly.

Nick Fury, asking purely out of concern as he sees uncomfortable or concerned looks on the Avengers’s faces: Is there any objections to how we get there? We’ll be traveling by road.

Tony, uncomfortable with cars/ground vehicles after his parents crash and the amount of times he nearly died by cars crashing into him too: *raises his hand*

Stephen, also uncomfortable with ground vehicles because it was the reason his hands are busted up: *raises hand too*

Fury, sighing before suggesting another option: The quinjet?

Bruce, already very uncomfortable with the mention of the quinjet: *raises his hand*

Fury, pinching his nose bridge: How about one of Stark’s planes. It has cloaking tech too.

Steve and Peter being uncomfortable with planes because Steve literally lived under ice for 70+ years and Peter is scared after the vulture accident and his parents died on a plane: *raises hand*

Fury, gripping onto the meeting table tightly to control his emotions: How about a train.

Bucky, extremely uncomfortable with trains(The man literally fell out of one). Steve, having witnessed Bucky fall off the train and is terrified:*raises hand*

Fury looks over to the two agents at the side, noticing how stiff they looked and their faces very close to betraying their emotions of terror, yet did not raise their hands at all: What the hell is wrong with the two of you

Clint and Natasha being uncomfortable and probably having beef with every type of transport known to mankind: *looks away and Nick has already figured out why*

Fury sighs deeply, now having to figure out how the hell is he going to get everyone to walk to their next mission.

Maria Hill coming up beside him to whisper something to Fury: Spin a wheel and whatever mode of transport it lands on, they either suck it up or we sedate them

Thor who only ever travels by the bifrost or quinjet: *visibly confused*

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yourmidnightlover · 5 months ago

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a lil blurb i cooked up a while ago but never posted… a bit angsty, a bit smutty. enjoy :)

18+

it didn't feel right, being here with him.

you know where your heart is, and it's nowhere near where you are right now. where you are being some nice restaurant in manhattan when you know that your heart is truly still in brooklyn, in the bed you never slept in, with the man you always slept with.

but the man before you was so kind. he checked every box there was. now, this was your third date with him in two months.

he had picked you up at your place, held your hand on the drive to the italian eatery. he even pulled your hand to his lips, pressing a tender kiss there just because he could.

he listened to you attentively. he asked questions about your parents, your life growing up. he asked what it was like being an avenger, not because he was a fan of the avengers, but because he wanted to support you and make sure everything was going well for you.

in return, you smiled at him. you thanked him for his kindness and thoughtfulness. you listened to him explaining his fears that he knew were silly and stupid. and you held his hand, too.

he made you laugh and smile. he was gorgeous, too. he was a man who worked a typical 9-5. he maintained hobbies, though. he was very fit, made sure to stay in shape by eating right and going to the gym at least four times a week. he let himself enjoy the best parts of life, never skipping dessert when he felt like it.

and when you were walking down the street to his parked car...

he held your hand.

the man who held your heart, however, never held your hand. his hand would occupy your neck, your wrists, your hair, your ass, so many parts of you his hand has held. but never so tender, and never your hand.

so, when josh dropped you back off at your place with no expectations other than a smile gracing your face, showing you actually enjoyed his presence, you pulled him in for a kiss.

but there were no fireworks that went off, no spark that was suddenly engulfed in flames that refused to be extinguished.

there was calm, and somewhat peace for you.

there was a river that calmly flowed through a pasture, a field of the most beautiful wildflowers you had ever seen.

but was that what you wanted?

"i had the best time tonight, josh." you pressed your forehead against his, his hands cradling your neck as his breath fanned over your face.

"i can't tell you how happy that makes me." you could feel his smile on your own face, his cheeks bunching up at the motion. "is it too soon to already ask you on another date? i would worry about being too forward, but i can't help it when i'm feeling this way about you."

you wish those words were coming from another pair of lips, but he was so wonderful. and you liked him, really, you did. he was everything you've ever wanted. he just wasn't bucky.

"i wouldn't say it's too soon at all," you agreed to the date, wishing him a good night and ordering him to get home safely before trudging inside and dreaming of the super soldier.

"steve, cut the shit," bucky was tired of steve beating around the bush. "what the hell is going on?"

steve sighed, knowing that he could never really keep a secret from his best friend. "look, i know you don't want to admit you love y/n, really, i do-"

"because i don't, okay!" the look bucky shot him before he resumed lifting the weights above his head made it seem like he would much rather be chucking the weights at steve's head. "now what the hell are you going on about?"

sam had told steve he saw you on a date with another man, looking mighty happy and grinning, at that. there was no doubt in steve's mind that bucky was in love with you, either.

he knew in the little things bucky always did.

he would always make sure that when someone did grocery runs they would stock up on your snacks on the off chance that you stayed at the compound for a night or two.

he always checked in with tony to make sure you returned from a mission in good shape, and if you were ever sent to the medbay he would speed to the compound, always staying in the waiting room and never letting anyone tell you he was there. but he was always there for you.

if there was a mission where he knew you would be exhausted afterword and would want to stay at the compound, he would make up your room himself, spraying your favorite scent all over the room and making sure your pillows where exactly how you liked them before making sure the bathroom was stocked with your favorite soap, shampoo and conditioner.

the times that the team would go out for drinks together, he would tell off any man that even looked in your direction, promising they would regret it when they would never be able to look at anything ever again if they looked at his girl,

of course, steve would never tell bucky that he knew he did those things. but bucky has never cared so much about someone to be so thoughtful and caring.

although, steve also knows that bucky is absolutely shit at explaining his feelings and showing affection face to face.

"y/n's been seeing someone." only steve would be able to tell the changes in his micro-expressions with as subtle as they were. although bucky is one of the best spies in the entire world, his best friend knew him before all of it.

"and?" he pushed the word out through gritted teeth.

"you don't care?" now this was entertaining...

"why should i?" he continued on as if nothing was said.

"well, they left together," steve shrugged, now taking on a nonchalant tone to see how far he could push this. "apparently they were all over each other the whole night. he couldn't drop her hand all night," he shook his head with a chuckle. "she seemed so happy with him. especially when they-"

"i don't care!" bucky slammed the weights in their rightful place. "why should i care, steve? she's not mine, okay?"

steve stayed quiet at the outburst, holding back a grin. finally, he had broken through to him.

"i'm not sure how serious they are..." he wanted to throw bucky a bone. he couldn't help it, that was his best friend.

he got an angry grunt in response before the brunette stormed out of the gym.

my girl.

mine.

out with another man.

smiling,

laughing,

happy.

he knew he never deserved you anyway. he was pushing his luck by having you the way that he has been.

but god, you were addicting. once you crossed that line, once he had you one time, he was hooked.

being engulfed in your being, holding your body close to his, feeling you come apart, being the reason you fell apart... it was intoxicating.

but he never wanted to taint you, or hurt you with who he was. his past, the demons he's faced, hydra's still alive. he never wanted you to be in danger. so, he acted like he hated you to protect you, physically and emotionally.

in spite of knowing it was for the better, he fucking hated it.

he wanted to scream from the rooftops how much he loved you. how he had you, if even only for a few hours, he got to make you his. you had carved your place in his heart, and as far as he was concerned, it would never erode with time.

but hearing that you had been with another man, letting him hold you how he had yearned for so long. it was truly only a matter of time before another man realized how wonderful you were, he had only hoped that he would be able to scare them off before they approached you. seems like this time he was too late.

"bucky," you sighed into his mouth as his fingers plunged in and out of you. "don't stop, please," your forehead rested against his as he smirked with a knowing look.

"i feel it, princess," he chuckled. "let go for me, cum all over my fucking hand, baby," your mouth opened in a silent scream as you came on his fingers, squeezing them tight as he caught your lips in a kiss as your legs began shaking, only being supported by his body pressing yours against the wall of his apartment. "that's my girl. fuck yea, keep going, princess." he let you ride out your high with a smile on his face.

"i want you, jamie," you were the only person he let call him that. ever.

"what do you want from me, baby?" he teased as you whined, gripping his shoulders even tighter.

"i want you to fuck me, please?" you sounded so desperate, like he was the only thing that could tether you to the earth at this very moment.

"since you asked so fucking nicely," he slid inside of you in one thrust, filling you to the brim so sweetly.

it felt like, as cliché as it sounds, a puzzle that finally showed the full picture. like finally seeing color after years of only black and white. like home. ang god, he didn't want to leave.

he wrapped your legs around his waist, walking you to his bed and laying down with you as he continued fucking into you. if this was the only way he could have you, he would show you all of his passion the only way he knew how.

"so pretty under me like this," your hands were thrown over his neck, pulling his face in the crook of your own. "feel so fucking good every time, princess." his thrusts sped up as he let one hand travel down your body to play with your clit, sending you over the edge. "atta girl," he fucked you through your high as he reached his own, his cum painting your walls as you kept chanting his name in a moan.

he pressed a kiss to your cheek before rolling to lay beside you, pulling you to lay on his chest. his heartbeat had a way of grounding you. you’d read once about how sometimes your hearts would synchronize… you forgot the stipulations of that, but you hoped that it was true. because if that was true then at least you were tied to him in a way not many others would have.

you sighed contently as he did nothing more than hold you. his arms securing you to him, his heartbeat grounding you. he was enveloping you in every sense of the word, he was all around you, and you didn’t even want to complain about it. to be quite frank, you would dream of being consumed by him. about him being in your life in every possible way.

perhaps the dream you had would be more of a premonition. of the life you could have with him if you both cut your shit out. of a life full of softness and holding hands.

or maybe that dream would never come into fruition… it would stay right where it belongs, in his arms as you slept only to be ripped from you in the morning.

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes fluff #james bucky barnes #marvel #bucky barnes smut #sargeant barnes #sargeant bucky barnes #smut #bucky smut #james barnes smut #sargeant james barnes #sargeant smut

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mrsbuckybarnes1917 · 1 year ago

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Request from @bisexuawolfsalt: May you please write a Bucky x virgin!reader who’s never been able to get herself off?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x female virgin!reader

Word Count: 5k

Warnings: masturbation, fingering

Everything about you was different. You'd always felt it. You never fit in with the people you'd grown up with. Friends had never felt close. You were sheltered, your parents had a habit of being overprotective, helicoptering over you until they were in a fatal accident just before your eighteenth birthday. That's when things changed for you, not just what you'd lost, but your body too. You were different, but not in the way you'd thought all your life. You were powered. You kept to yourself throughout college, barely keeping anyone around you as more than an acquaintance. Relationships were a foreign concept to you, be it one of friendship or romance. You'd experienced neither.

That was your story, until you found yourself in New York City in the middle of a Chitari invasion. When you back up an Avenger with your powers, you get noticed. Tony Stark found you and brought you in. It took some convincing, you weren't ready, you were afraid. You'd hidden yourself with a job in the New York Public library. But eventually you agreed to move into the Stark Tower.

That's where you first met Bucky. You had gotten to know Steve, Natasha, and Tony pretty well. Steve had come to knock on your door one day and brought Bucky with him. He had returned from Wakanda, free from his Winter Soldier programming. He didn't look as frightening as people had described him. There was a kindness behind his brilliant blue eyes, an intelligence and a sadness that drew you in. He was a solitary soul and so were you.

You felt comfortable in his presence. He said very little, in fact he barely made eye contact initially. Steve had encouraged him to make a friend and Bucky had chosen you, you didn't pester him about his well being, didn't cajole him about attending therapy, in fact you didn't bother him at all. You were the perfect friend. These were the reasons you believed Bucky had chosen you.

In reality Bucky couldn't get enough of being around you. He was drawn to you and you to him. Finally he had confessed his feelings to you and you had kissed him. Only Steve knew about your relationship with Bucky, you kept things private. You spent all your down time with Bucky but the two of you hadn't slept together, yet. Bucky had insisted that you wait until you were ready, after you'd told him that you hadn't been in any relationships in the past.

Today hadn't been any different from any other, not really. You'd spent time training in the gym with Steve, you'd done some reading, having decided to pursue a medical degree with your interest in science. You had a lot to learn, but you decided to take a break and grab yourself a bit of food. You walked into the kitchen where a group of SHIELD agents were also eating and talking. You blushed profusely when you heard their topic of discussion… masturbation!

“I love my Lioness. I swear if men’s penises were made with a vibration setting, I'd actually consider being with one,” one of them mused.

“Oh sweet girl, I’ve been married for five years, and let me tell you, sometimes only you have the means to get the job done. I mean I love my human dildo, but the rubber one gets the job done much better. It's got a suction up, so just slam it against the wall and go to town on it," her older colleague chimed in.

"Ah, you kids and your new fangled inventions and toys. I'm pretty old school, my fingers have been doing the job just fine for me all these years. Batteries not included," she smirked.

Their words made you blush, you had no idea what a Lioness even was, you cowered in the corner trying not to eavesdrop. The last thing you wanted was to be involved in this conversa-

"Hey!" You heard Piper, one of the agents calling your name. "What's your preference?"

You mostly kept to yourself, the other agents had no idea of your childhood or your lack of experience and you'd kept to yourself to avoid questions exactly like this.

“I - ummm…” you started stuttering nervously, eyes darting around for an excuse to avoid answering the question. You hoped no one would notice you biting your lip and wringing your hands with anxiety. “You know…”

“Come on girl, are you saying that hunk of yours is that good?”

“What?” You were shocked by Piper’s comment.

“Barnes, is he as good in bed as he looks like he would be?”

“What-”

“You don’t need to pretend, we’ve seen the two of you holding hands and smacking lips.”

You blushed, you had no idea that other people were aware of your relationship. But they couldn’t know that you hadn’t sealed the deal, could they?

“You have to give us some details,” they laughed good naturedly. “Is he that good that you don’t need to … you know, take care of yourself every now and then?”

There was no malicious intent in their questions, they were just making jovial conversation and including you, but you just wanted the floor to open up and swallow you whole. You wanted to tell them that Bucky was good, but you knew that they weren’t asking if he was a good person, they wanted to know if he was good at sex. You weren’t so out of touch with the world that you didn’t know what they were insinuating.

“He’s an amazing person-”

You were cut off by their beepers sounding off at the same time. Saved by the bell.

“See you around.” They smiled and winked at you as they left to see to their duties.

A silent sigh of relief escaped your lips as you gathered your meal and sat down in the vacated dining area. Your heart was no longer pounding on the inside of your chest, but your brain was in overdrive as you ruminated over the conversation between the agents. Without realizing it, you were thinking about what masturbation would actually be like.

You weren’t completely innocent or devoid of sexual urges, you had admired both handsome men and beautiful women, some of whom had even had you aroused. But you hadn’t dared act on those urges, mostly because you had no idea how and you were too ashamed to ask anyone you did know. You felt embarrassed that you had reached the age that you were without having had any real sexual encounters. You had been hesitant to explore your own anatomy, even in the privacy of your own home and now you’d reached the point in your life where you were too afraid to try it alone.

Your lunch remained half uneaten as you pondered your dilemma. Your interest had definitely been piqued and you started thinking about Bucky. He had been patient with you and your reluctance to engage in more intimate behavior. He had been incredibly understanding when you’d admitted to him that you were a virgin and hadn’t pushed you into any kind of non consensual conduct.

Everything you’d seen on television or read about, the act of sexual intercourse, the pleasure that came from an orgasm, you wanted to know how it felt. You felt a stirring between your legs at the very thought. But where would you get the information to do things right? You had so many questions. You thought about looking online but the computers in the Tower were all networked, and JARVIS had the ability to look into any search history. The thought of someone finding out terrified you. No, you would have to try something else.

This brought your thoughts around to Bucky. After careful consideration, you determined that Bucky was probably the best person to discuss your areas of learning. You knew that he was a little more experienced than you were and if you were to share a future with him, you would eventually engage in more intimate activity. So he would be the perfect person to ask. You picked up your phone and typed out a message.

You: Can I ask you something? It’s a bit embarrassing.

Bucky’s phone pinged as he sat listening to a discussion between Sam and Steve. He enjoyed watching them battle wits, as long as he wasn’t asked to take part. And when he did, he always sided with Steve, regardless of what his actual opinion was. He took his eyes off the pair to see your face light up his screen. Your face never failed to make the corner of Bucky’s mouth quirk up, as hard as he tried to hide it.

Bucky had never met anyone quite like you. Despite the trauma and loneliness you had suffered, it hadn’t made you cold or hard, in fact he thought you were the single most kind-hearted and loving person he’d ever met. Your intelligence surpassed that of many and he was almost shocked that you had chosen to bestow your affection on him. You were his angel, sent from heaven to show him what real love was. He texted you back immediately.

Bucky: Anything.

Bucky’s whole attention was on you now, your question had piqued his interest far more than the conversation between Sam and Steve ever had.

You: How do you masturbate?

Bucky’s eyes were ready to pop out of his skull as he read your question.

“Buck?” Steve called his friend again, trying to get his attention.

“Yeah?” Bucky cleared his throat, tearing his attention away from his phone.

“Can you settle this for us?”

“Yeah, I agree with Sam,” he answered.

Sam and Steve watched him get up and walk away with their jaws on the floor. But Bucky had no time for nor interest in their reaction. He was focused on your question.

Bucky: What makes you ask this question?

You: There were some agents in the kitchen and they were talking about masturbation…

Bucky: And you are curious?

You: Well yeah. So are you going to answer the question?

Bucky thought for a moment before responding.

Bucky: There isn’t just one way to masturbate.

You: Care to elaborate?

Bucky: Most people use their fingers. Now they have all these toys.

He thought for a moment, before sending a follow up text.

Bucky: Back in the day, we would make do with what was around. You just need to use it right.

As much as Bucky longed to offer you a hands on demonstration of the concept, he knew that he should give you the space to learn and experience things at your own pace, particularly with regards to your sexual relationship.

Bucky: You need to figure out what YOU like.

You bit your lip as you read Bucky’s answers, your fingers hovering above the screen as you tried to work up the courage to continue your conversation.

You: I don’t know what to do.

Bucky: You just have to try things out and see how you feel.

You typed out your response, you felt a tingling between your legs and an unfamiliar dampness. It took you several minutes for you to press send.

You: Will you show me?

Bucky’s mouth went dry as he read your reply. He felt himself stir at that thought of your question. He read your words over and over, contemplating his next move.

Bucky: Are you sure?

Bucky didn’t want to pressure you, or make you do anything you didn’t feel comfortable with, but the thought of being closer to you, more intimate with you made his body react and he could feel blood pumping south.

You: Ordinarily I’d probably use a Google search but I’m not particularly where I should be looking. Also most things are probably not targeted at women past their teenage years. Also I didn’t particularly want to leave a trail of cookies in my search history.

Bucky wasn't quite sure he understood all of your message. I was rather old fashioned, and even though he had some understanding of the modern world, he didn't feel entirely comfortable. He decided to help you the best way he knew how.

Bucky: Meet me when you're done with work?

You: Sure. Where do you want to meet?

Bucky: Your room. 6pm. Wear something comfortable.

Butterflies fluttered in your stomach as you read his message and answered.

You: See you soon.

Anticipation and anxiety had you back in your quarters much earlier than the time Bucky had advised. You decided to be prepared for his arrival, so you took a shower and performed all your necessary grooming rituals. You weren’t entirely out of the loop with regards to sex, but clinical application was very different from actual intimacy. The thought of Bucky’s touch excited you. Your relationship with him mostly involved emotional intimacy, he was nervous too, worried about hurting you physically. He had been happy to let you take the lead for the physical aspect of your relationship.

The thought of his touch elicited a tantalizing reaction from your body, the warmth, the wetness between your legs was exhilarating. There was an urge to touch yourself. It wasn’t that you hadn’t thought about this before, even tried exploring your own body, but you’d never quite achieved the intended goal. Today felt different. You could feel yourself pulsing in a way that you’d not felt before. And if Bucky wasn’t able to help you understand your own body, you were certain that no one would.

You put on a slightly oversized t-shirt, it was loose enough for you to move with ease, but fitted enough that your figure wasn’t hidden. You grabbed a pair of booty shorts, choosing to slip it over your hips without any underwear. The feeling of them against your uncovered core made you feel wicked. Your heart was still pounding and you needed something to relax, so you grabbed a bottle of Pinot Noir and poured yourself a generous glass.

A knock at the door made you jump, and the contents of the glass sloshed around dangerously. You took a small sip before putting it down on the counter of the small kitchenette in your room and went to answer the door.

“Hi.” You barely breathed the word as you found Bucky at your door.

He looked ethereal, he had clearly taken the time to go back to his room and prepare for your rendezvous after spending the day training new recruits. He slipped past you with a gentle greeting. He had washed his long hair which was loose and still slightly damp. He had donned a maroon Henley which you had told him was your favorite and as he brushed against you, you caught the scent of his cologne which did nothing but increase your arousal.

“How was your day, Doll?” Bucky asked, giving you a gentle peck on the cheek.

“Seriously, you want to ask about my day?” you said nervously, wringing your hands together.

Suddenly you felt out of your depth. How could this beautiful specimen of a man possibly be here for intimate relations with you? You turned around and took a mouthful of wine, coughing slightly as you swallowed.

“Hey, easy there, Doll. Being drunk isn’t helpful. You know,” he paused for a moment, “we don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with.”

He wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you close to his chest. You could feel his heart beating as your head rested against him. It was calming and you looked up at him.

“I want to.”

“If you change your mind at any time, you will tell me, right?”

You nodded, appreciative of his understanding.

“Sit down for a minute. I’m just going to set up a few things.”

“What kind of things?

Bucky held up a few candles. “I thought they’d make you feel more comfortable, relaxed.”

You watched Bucky place candles around your room and then dim the lighting. His movements were elegant, so smooth. You marveled at his grace and agility, his touch was delicate and you wondered how his hands would feel on your body. When he was done he came over to sit beside you as you clutched your wine glass.

“Oh Bucky, I’m sorry, here, let me get yo-”

You stopped as he put his hands on your shoulders. “Listen, before we start, no matter what happens today, I’m just here to help you… you know, please yourself. That doesn’t mean that we need to go any further. You don’t owe me sex. Got that?”

You nodded, feeling more relaxed, like he’d taken the weight of expectation off your shoulders. “Yeah, okay,” you whispered.

“Anytime you want to sto-”

His words were cut off by your lips on his. “Sorry,” you pulled away slowly. “You were kinda freaking me out.”

Bucky chuckled at your shyness.

“So what now?” you asked, uncertain of how to proceed.

“Do you feel…” He wasn’t sure how to ask you if you felt turned on.

You shrugged. “Every time I think about this, I feel nervous, but also kinda tingly.” Subconsciously, you squeezed your legs together seeking the pleasure that came from the friction.

Your reflexive moments didn’t go unnoticed by Bucky. “You feel good?”

You nodded. “Will you kiss me?”

Bucky smiled, cupping your face with his hands, pulling your lips towards his, caressing them with his tongue before gently slipping it into your mouth. His right arm dropped down, coming to rest around your waist. Both of you lost yourselves in the kiss for a few minutes before Bucky pulled away. “Want to keep making out?”

“Well, it is nice, but I’m ready. What do I do?”

“Do you want to take your clothes off?”

A soft blush crossed your features, Bucky could see it in the glow of candlelight. You started taking off your t-shirt, raising your arms to pull it over your head. Bucky’s eyes lingered over your breasts, trying not to stare as you struggled with the neck. He eventually tore his gaze away to help you complete the task. Bucky tossed the shirt aside on a nearby armchair and turned back to you. You could help but try to cover yourself with your arms.

“You look beautiful, Doll.” Bucky murmured. “What can I do to make you feel more comfortable?”

“I mean, I feel kinda exposed. Maybe if we were on even footing it would be less awkward?”

Bucky laughed, “so you want me to take my top off?”

“I wouldn’t say no.”

Bucky used one hand to swiftly shed his Henley, letting you ogle his chiseled chest for a moment.

"Why don't make yourself comfortable on the pillows.” He nodded his head up to the top of the bed.

You followed his instruction, crawling over to the top. You’d spent many an evening with Bucky buried under the covers watching movies late into the night. Several times you’d woken up the following morning wrapped in his arms, but today was different. You sat back against the stack of pillows making yourself comfortable.

“Aren’t you coming?” You asked, realizing that he was still sitting at the end of the bed.

His eyebrows shot up into his hairline. “Well, if you want me to…” he answered, voice suddenly a little shaky.

“Were you planning on sitting there with all your clothes on, watching me get myself off. I mean that’s kinda off putting.”

He walked around the edge of the bed and climbed on to sit beside you.

“If you take off your pants, I’ll lose my shorts.”

“You drive a hard bargain, Doll.” He smirked before shimmying off his jeans.

As hard as you tried, you couldn’t help the flush on your face as you stared at the outline of his bulge. Bucky smirked.

“Like what you see, Doll?”

There was something in his tone that made your insides feel tight, like there was something inside you trying to escape and you kept squeezing to stop it. Your body responded to his words in a way you’d never felt before.

“Your turn,” he said quietly, not a command, more of a request.

You lifted your ass off the bed and pushed your shorts down, over your thighs, sliding them over your knees and let them fall over your calves. Bucky helped you to unhook them from your feet before tossing them to the foot of the bed, just in case you wanted them again. He took a moment to let his eyes rove over your naked form, oh how he longed to touch you, but today was not for him to indulge his fantasies. Today was for you.

“Will you sit with me?” you asked.

“Can’t get a lot closer than this, Doll.” He was sitting right beside you, his thigh touching yours.

“Can we sit like we did the other day? When we went to the beach?” You remembered how it had felt to sit between Bucky’s legs, his strong arms wrapped around you protectively. You felt safe from the world. It’s not that you needed Bucky to keep you safe physically, you were perfectly capable of looking after yourself, no, he made you feel accepted. It was a feeling you wanted to hold on to forever.

Bucky let you climb between his legs, taking a deep breath as your ass brushed against him, “Okay?” he asked, his hands holding the top of your arms gently.

You nodded. “What now?”

“Well… we just need to figure out what you like, what feels good for you.” He paused, trying to figure out how best to advise you. It wasn’t like there was an official manual to be followed. “May I?” He put his fingers around your wrist, asking for permission to guide your movements.

His palm radiated warmth and you felt goosebumps erupting across your arms. “That feel good?”

“Yeah.”

“Why don’t we start up here?” He guided your hand up to your neck. “Start with soft touches.”

Following Bucky’s instruction, you traced the muscles along your neck and across your clavicle. A soft sigh leaves your lips as you reach the center of your chest. Bucky’s eyes flicked to your face as you closed your eyes and leaned back into him, his chest moves up and down slowly. His sturdiness and strength only served to amplify your arousal. He saw you bite your lower lip as your fingers grazed the skin on your breast. Naturally you cupped it, massaging the tissue slowly.

“Try pinching your nipple,” he whispered in your ear.

You do as you’re told and find yourself whimpering quietly. The feeling between your legs amplified ten fold, clenching needily.

“And the other side too, Doll.” Bucky muttered, his fingers sliding up and down your upper arm, the same arm you were using to touch your own body. “Feel good?”

“So good,” you sighed.

You leaned back again, the delectable sensations had you arching your back and now that you had moved past your breast, you noticed that the level of pleasure had changed a little, dimmed slightly. Bucky watched with rapt attention, mentally noting what you responded to for future reference. He resisted the urge to bury his face in your neck, press his lips against your sweet smelling skin. Your fingers skated quickly over your abdomen and made their way between your legs.

“Take your time, Doll. From what I've learned, getting a woman all worked up makes things more… intense.

"Before you touch down there, try rubbing here," he moved your hands to your thighs. "Just on the inside, Doll, just like that. You can use your fingers, or your whole hand. Try and see what you like."

You sighed, trying out the different techniques on the flesh of your thighs. Bucky’s skin itched with desire, there was nothing he wanted more than to put his own hands on your thighs, but he had promised you and he would keep his word.

“I like it more with my finger tips,” you leaned back into him, looking up into his eyes with a smile.

As you did, you noticed something pressing into your lower back. You pushed against it, curious about its shape. A shuddering breath and strangled moan escaped your boyfriend’s lips.

You looked back up at Bucky with surprise and you saw the blush on his face. It is a little embarrassing that it took you so long to realize what was touching you.

“Is that…”

“Yeah…you can just ignore… him. He shows up sometimes without invitation,” Bucky mumbled.

“Do you want me to-” you started asking if he wanted you to touch him, but Bucky cut you off.

“No, today we’re here for you. Focus on your own body.” Bucky shifted his hips back to avoid further friction but that didn’t quite stop his body reacting to you.

Bucky’s fingers skated across your skin with the lightest of touches, his breathing heavier than it was before as he watched your hands stroke over your inner thighs, edging closer and closer to your leaking core.

“Buck-” you whined quietly.

“Yeah?”

“I want…”

“Go ahead, start with one hand, maybe?” he suggested. “Feel over the outside.”

You hummed, arching back against him, and earning a groan from Bucky.

“If you feel comfortable, you can put your fingers between the folds and try rubbing your-.”

“Clit?”

“Yeah.”

“Wow, there’s a lot… it’s really wet.” You comment as your slick coats your exploring fingers.

“That’s good,” Bucky said encouragingly. “Have you found your-”

You gasped and grabbed Bucky’s muscular thigh as your fingers brushed over your sensitive bud for the first time. Your pussy clenched needily at the sensation.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” he chuckled darkly.

You continue moaning as your fingers rub circles over your pulsing clit. “Oh Bucky…”

He groaned at the way his name left your lips, filled with such longing. He panted softly as his fingers dug into your flesh, he had moved them from your arms down to your waist and it was taking a lot of self control for him to not let them roam over the rest of your body.

“It feels, I … I -” You couldn’t find the words to express what you needed. The new deletable sensations were something you’d never experienced and it was almost overwhelming.

“Use your words, Doll. Tell me what you need.”

“Inside, I want something inside.” The throbbing at your core was getting stronger.

“Good girl, that means you’re doing it right.”

“How do I do it?”

“Move your legs apart a bit more.”

You obliged and Bucky moved his legs under yours so you could hook your ankles around them for support and open up for yourself.

“Ready?”

“Yes,” you said with more confidence, it felt good, you wanted this.

“Try putting one finger in first. Go slowly.” He put his hand on yours, directing your finger along your slit before helping you push into your entrance.

Your thighs tightened as your finger entered this new territory.

“Try to relax, Doll. Take your time.”

Your finger slipped inside, you took deep breaths in an attempt to slow your pounding heart. Bucky couldn't help himself, he put his hands on your thighs, almost a subconscious movement as he focused on your activities. Watching as you dragged your finger in and out of your dripping pussy.

"That's right, just like that." Bucky crooned in your ear.

His lips felt soft on your neck. You didn't notice how he palmed himself at the same speed that your finger was disappearing inside you.

"If you want, you can put more fingers inside you."

“Umm hmmm.” You didn’t need his guidance to know what you wanted. “Keep talking though.” His voice in your ear was serving to be more an aphrodisiac than you’d expected. You changed the speed of your trusts, suddenly aware of a new feeling that you couldn’t quite identify.

“You like how that feels, Doll? Try hooking your fingers up slightly.”

He knew you’d found the right spot because of the way you bit your lip and squeezed your eyes closed, pushing back into his chest.

“You’re allowed to make noise, Doll. Actually, I encourage it.”

Your hips began to rock of their own accord and you could hear Bucky panting behind you.

“Oh God,” you whined. “Bucky…”

“I’m right here, Doll. You’re doing so good,” he moaned. “Use this hand, here.” Bucky placed your other hand over your clit, letting you take over rubbing the hard bud.

“Bucky…”

“Yeah?”

“Bucky,” you whimpered desperately, brows knitted together. You had no idea what you wanted from him. “Bucky-yy.”

“It’s okay, Doll. You’ve got this.”

You did, because without warning you felt yourself hurtling over the edge of a precipice you didn’t know you’d been standing on. Your walls pulses around your fingers as your body undulated to the feeling of ecstasy spreading out from your core through to your fingertips. Your powers crackled in a glow that surrounded your body.

As your breath finally settled down, you relaxed back into Bucky’s arms, a ridiculous smile spread across your face. Bucky’s arms surrounded you, holding you making you feel safe and supported.

“So? How did it feel?” Bucky asked, a tad impatiently.

You laughed bashfully in response, words not quite able to describe how giddy you felt in that moment, until Bucky was laughing along with you. You caught his lips as he turned his head to look at you, expressing your thanks with an affectionate kiss. As you leaned back, you were reminded of Bucky’s situation.

“That was amazing, Bucky. But what about you?” you asked.

“What about me?”

“Don’t you have to- I want to feel you… inside me.” Your voice dropped in volume at the end of your sentence.

Bucky shook his head. “Next time, today was for you. Besides, I kinda came when you were…” His voice trailed off looking a little embarrassed.

“Oh, sorry.”

“No, it’s not your fault, well actually-”

“Hey!” you pouted.

“In a good way. You look beautiful."

"Thanks for not judging me."

"Thank you for accepting me. For trusting me."

"Of course, Bucky. What happens now?"

"After we get dressed, we can order some food and watch a movie?"

"And maybe plan for when we can do this again?" You asked shyly.

"Sure thing, Doll."

You were glad that you'd had the courage to ask Bucky for his help, and hopefully some day soon, you'd be able to feel even closer to him that you'd done today.

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes imagine

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amethystarachnid · 3 months ago

Text

PROMISE

⤷ JAMES B. “BUCKY” BARNES

ᯓ★ Pairing: James B. “Bucky” Barnes x fem!reader

ᯓ★ Genre: romance, action and tiny bit of fluff, angst

ᯓ★ Request from: MARVEL bingo

ᯓ★ Story type: one shot

ᯓ★ Word count: 4k

ᯓ★ TW(s): reader tells Bucky that she wants him dead, swear words, depressed Bucky (?), reader gets shot so blood, coma

ᯓ★ Timeline: after CACW but everyone lives "happily" at the compound.

ᯓ★ Request: I'd love to req enemies to lovers Bucky where reader risks her life for him 🫶🏼 ( @roxymiaa )

ᯓ★ Comment if you want to be added to the taglist (specify if you want the everything taglist or for a specific character)

ᯓ★ Songs & Superheroes tales - The Game (to make a request, follow the rules on the link!)

ᯓ★ MARVEL Bingo (requests open)

ᯓ★ Masterlist

ᯓ★ If you are a Charles Xavier fan click on this link!

ᯓ★ English isn’t my first language and this isn’t proof read

ᯓ★ I realized I suck at writing enemies to lovers so yeah, sorry if this sucks since it's like a one-sided enemy thing (?), it's more like hate to love, and also, sorry for the wait <3

The Winter Solider, the man who killed your parents, the man whose life you wish to take even if doing so made you a killer.

The man who's living in your house and chatting with your friend, Natasha.

"If you keep glaring at him like that you'll burn holes in his head." Tony says as he sits next to you on the couch.

"I hope I do." You say as you sip your coffee, you hear your twin sigh.

"Listen, Y/N, I like having him here as much as you do and I know how much you hate him, hell, I hate him the same." Tony takes a deep breath, "But he was being brainwashed when he did what he did, you know that."

You look down. You know that it wasn't Bucky who killed your parents, you know that the man responsible for that is the Winter Soldier but Bucky is the Winter Soldier. How can everyone be so calm about it? Anyone could walk in the room at any moment, say a few Russian words and the man now holding a book in his right hand will use it to smash someone's head.

"I know." Is the only thing you say before standing up and walking out of the room, past Natasha and Bucky who are talking in Russian.

"Y/N" Natasha calls you and you turn around. "Will you be one of us for tonight's movie night?"

The Avengers' movie nights, where everyone sat in the cinema room to watch movies, if you remember correctly it would be Wanda's turn to choose them tonight, you and her always had similar taste in movies so it would be an enjoyable night with your dearest friends.

You were going to say yes, but then your eyes met Bucky's and it reminded you that he'd be there too.

You can barely stay in the same room as him during training or meals, the times where you're forces to share your space with him, but when you can choose to stay away from him, that's exactly what you do.

"No, I think I'll go to sleep early." Bucky looks down at your words, he knows that he's the reason you're isolating yourself more and more everyday, but there isn't much he can do.

He already apologized to Tony and you, he's even seeing a therapist now (that was Tony's condition to make him stay at the compound), he feels himself getting better and better everyday.

Especially knowing that Tony is searching for a way to erase completely the brainwashing from his mind, so that there'll be no way to turn him back in the Winter Soldier.

He looks at you as you walk away, knowing that there's nothing he can do to make you stop hating him when even he hates himself.

────୨ৎ────

You sit against a tree outside the compound, sipping a beer while deep in thought, but you still hear the faint footsteps approaching you from behind.

You recognize them immediately, since you have spent the last months avoiding them.

"Why are you here?" You ask harshly as you finish your beer.

"Wanda is making us watch Kate & Leopold for the fourth time, I couldn't take it anymore." He chuckles, standing next to your sitting form.

"She made me watch Australia ten times at least, but can't really blame her." You say with a small smile. Usually you would've already walked away from Bucky but the five beers you have already drank altered your mind.

"For the actor that starred in them?" You nod at his words.

"She's already excited for his new movie next year, Great Showman or something like that." You shrug your shoulders, trying to take another sip of beer but the bottle is empty.

"Here." He hands you an opened beer bottle and only then you notice that he has two in his hands.

Did he bring one for you only?

"You didn't poison this, did you?" You try to ignore the pain that flashes in his eyes at your words.

"I would never do that." He says, sitting down next to you, "Listen, I already apologized to you and Tony, what else do you want me to do?!" His voice is calm and this makes you even angrier at him.

You have been holding back your feelings for him for way too longs and the fact that you're also drunk makes you finally snap.

"To fucking die!" You yell at him, the bottle in your hand slips and hits the grass, shattering in tiny sharp pieces.

You don't even realize that there are tears coming out of your cheeks, running along your cheeks and then fall off your chin.

"Then kill me!" He takes a gun from the inside pocket of his jacket and puts it on your hands, your fingers immediately adapting to the familiar weight and your index finds its place on the trigger.

Bucky brings your armed hand against his chest and presses the gun against his body, "Kill me, because I swear to God, there's no one who wants me dead as much as I do."

Your eyes widen and suddenly you see the pain in his eyes, in his voice, in him.

"Do a favor to everyone on this fucking planet and kill me, please." His voice cracks at the last word and you see unshed tears in his eyes.

You have never thought about it like this, you were too focused on your own pain that you didn't even think that, maybe, he was in pain too.

Having to live with the memory of every person who he has killed, does he see blood on his hands everytime he looks at them?

"I...I..." Your eyes move quickly from his face to the gun in your hand, against his chest, right over his heart.

The heart you thought he didn't have, but now you understand that he does have a heart, a heart so fragile that it could break any moment if handled too roughly.

James Barnes does have a heart, one covered in scars and bandages and you don't want to be the one to add the final scar, the one that would shatter his injured heart completely.

The moon rays hit his blue eyes, making them almost magical.

"I know I don't deserve to live, I already tell myself that every night." A single tear runs down his beautiful left eye.

"T-That's not what I..." You stutter as you look at the broken man in front of you, how did you not realize it sooner?

Bucky hates himself for being the Winter Soldier as much as you do, if not more.

"I can't do it." You say as you stand up and drop the gun to the ground next to him.

"Isn't this what you've always wanted?" He says as he looks up at you, his eyes, big and glossy, remind you of a lost puppy that just wants to be comforted.

"I may have been wrong all this time." You look down at him, then glance at the gun by his side, "Don't do anything stupid with that, Steve would be sad." It's the excuse you give both him and yourself before walking inside the compound.

Once inside you turn around and see him hitting the tree with his right hand, you are too far away to understand what he's saying but he looks like he's crying.

"What happened to Barnes?" Tony's voice asks you from behind, you turn around and see him coming out of the cinema room, behind him you can see end credits rolling on the big screen.

"I don't know." You simply say before walking towards your room on the second floor.

────୨ৎ────

"What?! Have you gone mad?!" You look shocked at Steve and Tony, surprised that a plan as stupid as that came out of the two of them.

"You have to look past your personal problems, Y/N." Steve scolds you with a frown and if there is one thing that Captain America is good at, is making people feel guilty.

Like that one time you accidentally ate one of his yogurts and he looked so disappointed that you bought him twenty of them as an apology.

"This would be a great way to gain intel of this criminal organization who is selling weapons." Tony says, leaning back against his chair.

"And you think that sending me undercover with Bucky to a masked party in downtown Manhattan will help us?" You scoff at his words, crossing your arms over your chest.

You glance at Bucky, he has been silent during all the length of the meeting.

"We are sending you two because you are the only people who we trust enough to do it and because you have the last chances of being recognized." Steve explains, calmly as always, "People don't know Bucky's face, they may know yours, but we have masks that can make people see your features in other ways."

"With my technology we could make people see him bald." Tony points at Bucky, he looks up and touches his hair.

"I like my hair." He simply says, glancing awkwardly at you. Things between you two have been even more awkward than before after what happened under the tree two weeks ago.

"Fine, I'll do it." You scoff and stand up, Tony claps his hands together.

"Great, you already have a stunning dress waiting for you in your room, the party is in three hours." Your brother says.

"Three hours?!" You and Bucky say at the same time, you could get physically ready quickly but you needed your time getting mentally ready to spend a whole evening with Bucky glued to your hip.

"Yes, Mr. and Mrs. Jones." Tony says, handing you and Bucky an invite each.

"How did you get these?" Bucky asks.

"They're fake, obviously, but anyone who will look at them won't understand it because I did it." He says, showing off his ego.

Two hours and half later, you're walking outside the compound in a shiny designer black dress, already wearing Tony's mask which makes you completely unrecognizable to everyone else but Bucky apparently.

“You look…beautiful.” Bucky says as he looks at you, he too is wearing a designer black suit and it looks ridiculously good on him.

“Thank you…” You give him a small smile, “You don’t look too bad either.”

He smiles and looks down at himself, "Shall we go?", he hopes the car door for you and closes it once you're sat inside.

"So our cover is this: we've been married for five years and are secretly the owners of a large weapon-making industry, which is so secret no one has ever heard of it." You repeat to Bucky as he starts the car, drivinig out of the compound's garage.

"That's what they told us, yes." He nods.

"But we need more backstory if we want to do it correctly." You sigh, why didn't Tony write a full script for you two? He usually prefers to have every single backstory detail already organized in case of emergency, "Let's say…We met when we were twenty, it was love at first sight and…Oh yes! Our families didn't approve of us so we got separated and then we ran away five years ago and we got married!"

Bucky glances at you briefly before turning his eyes back on the road, "Are you sure we need all these details? I don't think anyone will ask us this type of things."

"Bucky, this is a party in downtown Manhattan, I have been invited to those kinda party before…" You look at him in disbelief, "Can you even imagine how noesy the people that attend those parties are? They live for drama, and they want every single detail."

"So you too?" He grins, "you too are noesy since you attend those parties."

"Oh, I'm the noesiest of them all, that's why I'm tellying you that we need to be really good with our acting." You turn your eyes on the road too, suddenly realizying that you called him Bucky earlier and not by his last name like you usually do, "So we need to act like we're deeply in love."

"That won't be hard." He smiles, "I've always been a great actor."

"Why don't I have trouble believing that?" You chuckle, leaning against your seat more relaxed, looking out the car window.

────୨ৎ────

"Oh you two are so cute." An old woman says as she looks at me and Bucky: his arm is wrapped around your waist while the other hold a glass of champagne, there's a mask similar to the one you are wearing on his face.

"Thank you, ma'am." You reply politely, it only takes you one glance at her to understand that she's the one hosting the party and so is the most powerful person in the room, for the moment at least. "Your dress is gorgeous."

"Oh dear, I see you have extraordinary taste…" She glances at Bucky, "But I should've understood that just by looking at your husband."

"He is handsome isn't he?" You smile, glancing at Bucky, you don't know what Tony's mask is making her see but with the mask or not, Bucky is indeed one of the most handsome man you've ever laid eyes on.

"Oh but I think my wife here is ten times more beautiful than me." Bucky gives you hip a playful squeeze, kissing your cheek.

"I see that you are still in the honeymoon phase." The woman chuckles. "How long have you been married?"

"It'll soon be our fifth anniversary." You smile at her, taking a sip of your champagne.

"Adorable, and what does your work consist of?" She asks, arching a brow. There are more than one hundred people at the party, it doesn't surprise you that she doesn't remember all of them and thanks to this she can't really remember if she really invited you or not.

"We produce weapons." Bucky explains, "We're new to the industry, so we were really happy when we received your invitation, it isn't every day that you receive an invitation by Miss Lond." You smile at his words, he understood one of the basic rules of parties: always flatter the host.

Miss Long chuckles, hiding the lower part of her face that isn't hiding behind the mask behind her fan, "Please follow me, I'll introduce you to some of my dearest friends."

During the rest of the night the microphone you're wearing gathers all the information for you and the party is going smoothly...Too smooth.

"I have a strange feeling." Bucky says as you two stand on the side of the dance floor.

"Yeah, me too, this mission is going too smoothly." Your attention is taken by the noise of a microphone being turned on and then you see Miss Lond walk on the small stage at the center of the room.

"My dear guests, I'm really glad you could make it here, I hope you are enjoying the party." The woman starts, "I hope to make it more interesting by starting a treasure hunt."

Murmurs emerge from the room and people look at her confused.

"We should go." Bucky whispers in your ear, you nod and hold his hand as he walks in front of you towards the exit.

"We have special guests here...Y/N Stark and The Winter Soldier!" After her words all the lights in the room - literally - point at you two.

"Well, no need to hide anymore." You say as you take the mask off, the same does Bucky. He reaches for the gun in his jacket and you for the bracelet that Tony gave you, which quickly turns into something similar to his Iron Man suit but that only covers your arm.

"I'll give five million dollars to whoever will bring them to me! Dead or alive, it doesn't matter!" She laugh in the microphone.

The air crackles with tension as you and Bucky stand back-to-back, encircled by a sea of armed enemies. Your pulse quickens, but you steady your breathing, fingers brushing the edge of the wrist-mounted device Tony gave you. It's not a full suit, but it’s packed with enough tech to keep you alive — and dangerous.

Bucky’s voice is low and steady behind you. "First time fighting a small army?"

"First time fighting with you," you reply, flicking the device on. A translucent energy shield springs to life on your left arm, while the right crackles with an electric charge, ready to strike.

"Stick close, then," he says, a hint of a grin in his tone. "I'll cover you."

The first wave rushes in, and the chaos begins.

You pivot just as a gunman fires, your shield absorbing the bullets with a flickering hum. With a swift movement, you deactivate it and thrust your right hand forward, sending a burst of electricity into the attacker. He convulses and drops, but there’s no time to celebrate.

Bucky is a blur beside you, his metal arm a deadly weapon as he blocks a knife strike and counters with a bone-shattering punch. His movements are fluid, precise, like he’s done this a thousand times before.

But it’s the first for you.

Two more rush at you, and instinct kicks in. You duck low, shield reactivating just in time to block a swinging blade. With a sharp twist, you bash the shield into the attacker’s face, then spin and release a concussive blast from your device, sending the other flying.

"Not bad," Bucky grunts, catching a gunman by the throat and slamming him into the ground. "But keep your guard up."

"Thanks for the tip," you shoot back, dodging a hail of bullets and firing a stun charge in return. The shooter drops, twitching.

The two of you are able to get out of the room, "Wait!" Bucky stops you. You two put tables and chairs and everything you can find in front of the door to gain some time.

The moment you and Bucky burst out onto the open street, you know something’s wrong. The hairs on the back of your neck prickle, and your instincts scream at you to move. You catch a glint of metal on the rooftop: snipers. Without thinking, you lunge toward Bucky.

“Get down!” you shout, raising the energy shield just as the first shot rings out. The bullet ricochets off the shield with a sharp clang, and Bucky turns to you, eyes wide with surprise and something else —concern.

You barely manage a breath before another shot echoes. This one doesn’t bounce off. Pain blossoms in your side, hot and searing. The world blurs as you stumble, the shield flickering out as your strength falters.

“Y/N!” Bucky’s voice is raw, panicked, as he catches you before you hit the ground. His metal arm is solid, grounding you, but it feels like you’re floating—disconnected. The pain is overwhelming, but the look on his face cuts deeper.

“I’m—” you try to speak, but the words catch in your throat, replaced by a choked gasp. You clutch at your side, blood seeping between your fingers.

“Why did you that?!" He yells as he picks you up, quickly running in the car, laying you in the backseats and quickly driving towards the compound.

"Because you deserve to live." You simply say, trying to get a glimpse of him from the backseat, are those tears running down his eyes?

"But not at the cost of your own life!" He shouts, hitting the steering wheel with his fist.

"I'll survive." You stutter, pressing your hand over the wound.

"I sure hope you do so I can kill you myself." He shakes his head.

"I expected a thank you at least, is that how you will repay me for saving your life?" You chuckle, coughing up blood right after.

"I swear when you'll get out of the infirmary of the compound I'll kiss the life out of you."

Your eyes widen at his words and you smile, "I take it as a promise." You say as your eyes slowly close.

"Y/N? Y/N!" Are the last words you hear from him.

Two weeks later

Your eyes slowly open but you have to close them again because of the brightness of the room: you are in the compound's infirmary.

"You're awake." Bucky enters the room just as your eyes get used to the light, "Tony just left to get something to eat, he hasn't left your side since I got you back here."

"What happened to you?" You ask confused as you see his bruised face.

He chuckles and sits on the chair next to your bed, "Tony." He shakes his head, "He got mad at me when you came back unconscious and I almost without a scratch."

"What an asshole." You sigh.

"So, how do you feel?" He asks gently.

"Thirsty." You joke and he immediately hands you a glass of water while he tells you that you have been in coma for two weeks.

"Guess I finally was able to get some sleep." He shakes his head at your joke.

"Jokes like this remind me that you are, in fact, related to Tony." He places the glass back on the bedside table.

"So?" You ask as you raise a brow.

"So what?"

"What about your promise?"

"Which promise?"

"To kiss the life out of me once I'm healed."

"You aren't healed yet."

"Maybe a kiss will heal me."

"I thought you hated me."

"Hate, like, love...They're all so similar." You smirk as he gets closer to you.

"Call me old fashioned, but I usually prefer taking girls out on a date first." His face is so close to yours.

"Call me new fashioned, but I think we don't need a date first since I risked my life for you."

"Promise to go on a fate with me anyway after you get Banner's approval?"

"Promise." His lips are finally on yours and even thought your breath probably stinks because of the two weeks you spent in a come, you couldn't care less because his lips are so soft that you can't focus on anything else.

Until you hear a plate shattering from outside the room.

You and Bucky immediately separate and look at the wall that faces the hallway...Which is completely made of glass.

And right behind that glass stands Tony, with a broken plate and food at his feet, his mouth open wide in shock.

"Oh shit, am I a dead man?" Bucky asks you even though you both can't hold back a laugh.

"BARNES DID YOU JUST KISS MY LITTLE SITER?!"

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