#today started off shitty but | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

yardsards · 4 months

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i needed to express a sentiment in the creative stylings of @dunmeshiminimumwage

#eliot posts #dunme #delicious in dungeon #dungeon meshi #sorry to put toshiro in the roll of shitty job interviewer lmao #but he was the best fit for ''guy that wants me to read their mind''#laios being my internal monologue here #i was on my THIRD interview of the day i was Dying #tho since the prev two interviews i had were for similar positions and told me their salaries outright at least i could use that number #(though tbh my work persona is more of a kabru. my customer service voice is unparalleled)#(at my first job even my coworkers thought i was sooo cheerful til i got too comfy and casually made a joke abt wanting to asphyxiate on a #plastic shopping bag like a sea turtle. in front of my sweet elderly coworker. oops!)#(also this job was during quarantine and after weeks of working together i took my mask off in front of one coworker for the first time #and she called like half the department over from their registers to look at how pretty i was??? prettyboy powers unmatched ig)#(also my first interview today went SO well i charmed that interviewer so good despite my lack of qualifications)#(she even complimented my social skills and said i seemed like the type who could get along well and make good conversation with anyone!)#(which is important bc i was interviewing for an elder care position. also old people especially tend to think i am a Delightful Young Lad)#(unless i accidentally make a morbid joke around them ig lmaooo. or. well. some of them like those too. but not that one coworker lol)#(if only that skill transferred over to actually making friends irl. my autistic ass has so few close irl connections)#(i hope my exceedingly short list of character references does not prevent me from getting hired)#AND ALSO my first job asked the same wage question and i said twelve dollars #and they were like all our new employees start at 7.75 #the union insists that we pay all new employees a whopping 50 cents above min wage. (we'd pay less if we could)#like dawg why did you ask that then??? if my answer did not matter at all???

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emmavakarian-theirin · 17 days

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ello

#anaesthetic does wonders for my skin which has always been weird to me #now onto the shitty stuff because i woke up during the surgery TWICE and after the second time they didn't bother give me something to numb #-the pain because it was nearly over?#and they did procedures on me. 1 - grab samples to see how far the cancer has spread and then #2 - cut out said cancer based off the results #because the last 2 operations they didn't cut it all out #but the real kicker here is they didn't wait for results and operated anyway #and therefore they potentially didn't get it all again and i'll need surgery again and today was a waste #anyway i started crying on the surgery table and couldn't stop and i was so fucking angry and tired #how have i been fucked over and over again like this like what the actual fuck is happening #it's like there's no communication or plenty of miscommunication #not just between me but the doctors too #the last few months have been so surreal like i feel like it's all a dream and can be undone because wtf. I don't feel human

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dreamlogic · 1 month

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...

#talked to my credit union about pre-approval for an auto loan. im gonna frow up #tldr; i just started a new job after completely depleting my savings over the last couple months #and my fucking car has decided that NOW is the time it wants to begin its death throws after 17 years & 190k miles #so rather than wait for the engine to explode on the highway or something i'm spending money i don't have #(many thousands of dollars that i will need to borrow. specifically. 🤢)#to shell out for a newer & hopefully more reliable car before winter hits. and then i'm just gonna pray my new income can cover it!!!!!#on one hand i'm excited cuz it'll be the first car i've ever owned that wasn't a shitty hand-me-down with over 150k on it already #and i am absolutely drooooooling over the one i'm gonna test drive tomorrow #but on the other hand. it feels very precarious to take on this amount of debt right now and i'm FREAKING THE FUCK OUT.#i was worrying this morning tha ri was rushing into things and maybe it would be better to try to hold off for a couple months #but then i had to use my own car for work today instead of a fleet vehicle and the engine started displaying Silly Behaviors*#(*RPMs doing whatever they feel like randomly & a noticeable Clunk whenever i'd shift gears)#and since this thing has already cost like 1k in two emergency mechanic trips in the last two months #i feel justified in my decision to just take the L and hope nobody will look at it too closely when assessing its trade-in value 😔#ctxt #money talk cw

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m4ndysk4nkovich · 11 months

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happy november, everyone. in honor of november, i’m thinking about her

#season 2 monica gallagher effected me personally #the way that she was aware of what she was and what was happening to her #and she admitted to how shitty of a mother she was #AND THEN she tells debbie theyre better off without her and DRIVES AWAY #i could write a whole essay about that scene in 2x12 and im tempted to #(and if it wasn’t obvious november is monica’s season because she came late october and left late november)#actually 2x10 starts nov 1 which is today (where i am)#shameless #monica gallagher #shameless season 2 #2x09 #2x10 #2x11 #2x12 #chloe webb

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sea-buns · 2 months

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it just set in for me that i start community college this upcoming monday literally less than a week from now and i want. to throw up

#its a combo of omg holy shit my life is progressing im healing im reforming into a human being im a real boy #and ✨academic trauma✨ reflecting on my life now vs the last 6 years and the last time i was in school #and im not handling it well. maybe i am a little cuz so far i have held back the tears but i dont think thats an acceptable bar #the tears are certainly there. and i most certainly feel like losing the little ive eaten today #ive also started seriously considering if it would be more or less strategic to skip cr today in favor of playing smth with a friend #i was like dang its important to take the time when we're both free #but also cr uploads on mondays and ive reignited my interest in watching live and i dont trust myself to fight the vod impulse on that day #i want things to be different and i want to do good and i want to feel all the progress ive made in action #so if she is available today im gonna be honest and say sorry i cant play this thing we were both excited about bc ive got a 4 hour #nerd show tonight. and im gonna feel really shitty about it.#feels shitty and stupid to choose a piece of media thatll always be there over quality friend time #but i know if i dont get this shit thats always gonna be there over with NOW itll be really hard to put off later #hhhhhhh #im a mess dude ima finish the video i was watching before i started having a crisis and then im gonna take a bath #and then maybe stardew valley. it is the game for when life is falling apart and i just deep cleaned my desk itll be so nice

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ladykyrin · 12 days

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Told my psychiatrist today that I’m tired of fighting my mental illnesses because I’ve been in treatment for eight years and I’m still suicidal, and she responded, “I mean, what have you really been doing to fight, though?”

It would’ve hurt less if she’d punched me in the fucking face.

#it COMPLETELY blindsided me #my first few appointments with her have been great #she was thoughtful and understanding and seemed to really listen and pay attention to everything I said #but today’s appointment was a nightmare from start to finish #she spent so much time basically questioning if I was putting actual effort into trying to heal #and acting like I haven’t been trying hard enough #and she asked if I even know where my depression even comes from??#like yeah!! I do!! years of trauma and bullying and dealing with horrible parents on top of a foundation of inherited shitty brain chemistry #this isn’t my first fucking rodeo ma’am #you are my fourth psychiatrist #I’ve done therapy on and off for nearly a decade #I understand my own fucking illness and I’ve been literally fighting for my life for SO long #I try so fucking hard #it just hasn’t been enough #and I’m done. I’m tired. I want it to end

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qvietspvce · 1 month

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every time that i eat when i’m hungry regardless of the time of day or how many meals i’ve already eaten i count it as a fucking win

#even if the shitty voice in my head started going ‘but you ate dinner a few hours ago!! but you’ve already had 3 meals today!!!’#fuuuuuuck off shitty little voice #i am hungry therefore i will eat #i fancy a little chocolate as a treat?? therefore i will eat #i have a devastating urge for turkey dinosaurs and chips?? i’m gonna eat!

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teabutmakeitazure · 2 months

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had an argument with mother due to being emotionally unstable (it's the depression weeks and everything sucks) and everything she said just made me angrier and it took me a while to realise I am becoming my mother. guys I am going insane

#ive been a bit ticked off since i woke up #and when my course selection process started lagging today i did consider doing something harmful to myself #which was completely an inteusive thought #conbine that with my existential dread because im dumb and idk what im doing in life #and the depression weeks. and suddenly i cant handle things i usually can handle #and i got angry at mother for talking nonsense (she was just discussing things)#she was always this way (still is) so to see myself blow up like she always does feels kinda shitty #we really are wretched mirror images of each other huh #zuri rambles #i already feel like a failure because I'm not able to be academically competitive with how hard uni is so this kind of sucks #to Google docs i go ig

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whoblewboobear · 2 months

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I don’t curse around my parents ever but Is2g talking to my mom always has me heated enough to wanna start.

#ough the way I’ll be happy to never speak to her the minute I move out #I wanna call my sister about it but she’s out and I hate reminding her of how shitty our mom is #like she knows she lived it she still does by trying to have a relationship with her #I fully would love to never have a relationship with my mother ever she’s an abusive piece of shit and a thief and a manipulator like 🖕🖕🖕#it’s so :/ bc I tried for YEARS to have a relationship with her and this was the year I’ve stopped trying #girlie said I make her life miserable bc I was pissed at her for stealing and pawning my camera #like I- holy shit she’s so fucking rotten #every time I catch myself starting to open up to her again (today) she just talks over me or cuts me off #it’s so :/ especially when I’m talking about my health and how fucking drained I feel all the time or mental health wise like she couldn’t #careless if I lived or died fr #I went to the ER and her ass asked me to buy her something from the vending machine and then left the minute she could like fuck you fr #now see this is why I have to project my mommy issues onto a fictional man bc if I don’t I’ll scream irl #personal

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synthetic-sonata · 2 months

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got a buncha stuff for my switch and kirbys return to dream land deluxe. ... living life large ( i had a breakdown earlier this is a treat )