#to eat eggs | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

3-aem · 11 months ago

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my toxic trait is picking up random hobbies on a whim like today i went shopping for a cardigan but found No cardigan i liked and so i naturally decided that i can just knit one even tho the only thing i have ever knit was a 8” by 3” rectangle in 5th grade that just looked so pathetic-

#digital art is truly one of the cheapest hobbies #hobbies i do not recommend with my entire soul: baking #fk baking i have beef with baking baking is a fking SCAM #i denounce ur sugar cookie recipe and ur stupid apple tartes!!!#actually i really love both #but eggs are so expensive now it just cant be worth it #btw who allowed egg prices to go back up #bruh i dont want to pay more than #like 20 cents per egg thats how much they are worth to me #oh but the sanity of the chickens u know what i didnt make the farming industry they should figure that out and i should still be allowed #to eat eggs #also like short of driving to a farm urself and verifying the free rangeness u just cant trust the labels #free range could refer to the holy pasture fields #or it could mean like a 0.2 sqft pissing block outside the pen #im tired of making posts about gj let me vent about eggs for one night geez #delete later

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inbabylontheywept · 5 months ago

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so once me and my wife were watching a documentary where a snake ate like a million eggs. that snake just went to fucking town on eggs. and the snake made the eggs look so good that i kept thinking about it, and thinking about it, and thinking about it, and eventually it was 11pm and i ran out of willpower and decided to eat one (1) singular raw egg just to prove to myself that the snake was surely a liar.

the snake was not a liar. texture is like, super important to me and raw eggs are very Texture so i had another one, and then another one, and then another one, and eventually i ran out of eggs.

i had like, fifteen raw eggs.

i didnt really know how to explain this momentary madness to my wife, so my Plan was to put all the eggshells into a grocey bag, and then throw that grocery bag in the dumpster, and if she never noticed that would be Excellent and if she noticed immediately i could lie and say that the eggs went bad.

except i cant lie very good, and of course with murphys law being such, i got salmonella.

so i threw up a lot and my wife asked me what poisoned me so and i tried very hard to dodge the question but i was oozing shame like oil from a room temperature cheese and eventaully i gave in and told her everything and to her enormous credit she was more flabbergasted than actually upset. she did make me promise to not eat any more raw eggs, which i have stuck to, and she gives me weird looks during nature documentaries now as if desire was the only thing keeping me from eating thousands of pounds of krill anyway i made a joke earlier about being able to eat my age in eggs and my sister in law in law made a drawing to comemorate the moment and also because it was my birthday. she's excellent. thank you 10000000% @cintailed. you should all visit her page and admire her work.

#i feel a kinship with that snake #would that i could be a simple tube #and eat my fill of eggs #but being a person is rather nice too #my wife is a saint #and i promise that most of the time she is the goblin and i am the Serious Guy #but i had a little pique of insanity and you know what it was my junior year of college #and i deserved to just go a little insane #you spent 65 hours a week being Rational and then you go home and eat like twenty raw eggs

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toyastales · 1 month ago

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Breakfast Platter

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herpsandbirds · 1 year ago

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Common Egg-eating Snake (Dasypeltis scabra), family Colubridae, South Africa

photograph by Cristian Schneider

#egg eating snake #dasypeltis #colubridae #snake #reptile #herpetology #africa #animals #nature

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laurellala · 20 days ago

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What if the characters in Ace Attorney all texted each other. Because they're friends. <3

(My alt text descriptions were a little long so I've added the individual text exchanges below, btw if there's any way I can improve my alt text please let me know!)

[id: drawing one shows text history between Maya Fey and Phoenix Wright on Nick's phone, starting with older texts at the top

Maya: ramen? (Nick has given this a thumbs up)

now we see texts from today at 11:37

Maya: Burgers?

Nick: sorry, not today, big case :(

Maya: Aww Nick

Maya: I'll pick it up and bring it over!

Maya: ... can i use your credit card (she punctuates the sentence with a big smiling face emoji) /end id]

[id: drawing two shows text history between Phoenix Wright and Miles Edgeworth on Miles's phone, starting with older texts at the top

Edgeworth: This was a riveting article, I thought it might interest you.

now we see texts from today

Nick sends a screenshot of a twitter post that reads: Lawyers help people get through the worst day of their life. They're good at it because they have experience getting through their own worst day, which just so happens to be every waking day of their existence

Miles: Ha.

Nick: Just one "ha"?

Miles: Not your best work.

Nick sends a frowny face :( /end id]

[id: drawing three shows text history between Miles Edgeworth and Maya Fey on Maya's phone. The text bubbles from Maya here are green as a result of her, an iPhone user texting Miles, a google pixel user. Maya has also sprinkled several emojis into Miles's contact name, the libra scales, the angry face emoji, the shouting emoji, and the clashing swords emoji. They're mid conversation and Miles has sent a text bubble so big we can't read the whole thing.

Miles: -completely unnecessary. Doing a Steel Samurai reboot so soon after the series ended is a foolish decision, everyone will be directly comparing the two from the moment the first episode drops. I don't believe they even have a fresh direction for the show, the only difference will be the cgi. God forbid we rock the boat and follow a new character! It's abundantly clear to me that the studio executives are cowards.

Maya: Oh my gosh, and did you see the new outfits? Maya includes a sobbing emoji

Miles: Oh, don't get me started.

we see three dots at the bottom of the screen indicating that Miles is still typing. /end id]

#LET IT BE KNOWN i don't care about phone brands and the only reason i specified was because i wanted miles to be pretentious and different #i know they all have flip phones in the game but I imagine them existing in the modern day purely because i think maya would love tik tok #also sneaky easter egg... Sanrio charms on mayas phone and sanrio sticker on nick's phone.... she gave it to him #they all care for each other... maya gives nick trinkets and makes sure he eats... miles and maya share their interests together...#nick and miles send things that remind them of each other... love languages my beloved #i'm so glad it's just them that are friends and there isn't a 4th guy who hangs around and causes problems on purpose and rhymes with barry #ace attorney #ace attorney fanart #my art #gyakuten saiban #miles edgeworth #phoenix wright #maya fey #naruhodo ryuichi #mitsurugi reiji

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azuneekun · 8 months ago

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MY EGG ???????????????????????????

#stardew valley #stardew valley alex #alex stardew valley #stardew alex #alex stardew #sdv alex #alex sdv #sv alex #alex sv #stardew #sdv #sv #my art #sdv farmer #stardew valley farmer #WHYD HE FUCKNIG EAT M EGG LIEKT HAT WHATS WROMNG WITH HIM?????I SCREAMED #nvm i need to study him in an enclosure behind the bushes #also i havent drawn a comic in so long. sorry im so rusty i gave up so i can go back playing stardew sorry

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pangur-and-grim · 5 months ago

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Rusty Nail had an unfortunate encounter

#rusty nail #she's alright now!#my parents took her to an emergency clinic to have all the quills removed #though apparently she was subdued and 'didn't eat her morning egg' (as reported by my mom)

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b0nelessdoodles · 11 months ago

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tfw you're three deep in anchordeep and you get the notif that you're baby has been neglected so you turn into a speedrunner to get home

#cult of the lamb #cotl lamb #sins of the flesh is such a good update i'm living #shoutout to me and my friends that i was streaming to screaming when the notif popped up #we all got cuteness aggression towards when the first egg hatch holy shit #i will draw my sweet baby who is actually my lamb's nephew i think is the right relationship #lamb's husband's brother's kid #anyway i am playing favorites this kid is getting the immortality necklace and everyone else can perish #this game has no business being so fun tbh it is eating my brain

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egophiliac · 1 year ago

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SHE'S DONE! after a thousand years, she's finally done! ...or at least I'm done with her! (tumblr please don't absolutely destroy my gifs, I am begging you)

(this is not an edit, I drew her from scratch! please do not tag or treat as an edit!)

now you know the real reason I haven't been obsessively drawing Meleanor, which is that I was in fact obsessively drawing Meleanor but in secret. plus a little background just for fun!

I am. not super happy with her rig; parts of her proved way more difficult than I expected and I very quickly hit the point of "okay, this is a silly fan project and not something that I'm being paid for or has to be really functional, time to MANUALLY KEY ALL THE VERTICES FOREVER". I think the end result came out pretty okay though! just...don't look too close. :')

I recorded some of the drawing part, so I might put that up later! in the meantime I am going to make her do stupid poses for my own enjoyment!

#art #twisted wonderland #brace yourselves for the spoiler tags #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 part 5 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 part 5 spoilers #gif warning #gifs that will yeet an egg into your face warning #(no shadows on the transparent gifs because gif compression eats feathered edges for breakfast)#for once i actually had a think about a couple of animations to do before i started!#don't get me wrong i still wasted a ton of time drawing a bunch of extra hands that will never be used #but you know that's still progress for me #getting to wiggle those little lace fronds around almost made up for the absolute hell the rest of the cape was #spineposting

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shirecorn · 2 months ago

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Avoidance Avoidance

IT HAS BEEN TOO LONG/I FORGET HOW/THEY WILL BE ANGRY/I CAUSED THIS MYSELF/IT'S GOING TO HURT/AND I WILL KNOW/IT IS MY OWN FAULT/IT'S GOING TO HURT/IT'S GOING TO HURT/IT'S GOING TO HURT

I CAN'T FACE IT

#and then you do face it and its like oh #that wasnt so bad #the snakes in your stomach are eating each other #they will not stop if you ignore them #they will only stop if you feed them mice and birds and eggs #but first you must look at the knotted mess and say yes its my fault #but it wont get better unless i touch it #and put some hand sanitizer at the edges of each mouth #that causes snakes to regurgitate its really helpful #shire draws #vent #vent art #you can reblog it tho dw

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obsob · 1 year ago

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