#to be treated that way
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In conclusion: dont trust a girl saying he is "bestie"
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also worth noting that "abusive" doesn't actually mean "irredeemable" either.
there's a lot of people that have done things in the past that were bad, because they weren't taught any better, or they were in an overall toxic situation where EVERYONE was shitty (like a cult), or they were just at an especially low point and hurt others for it.
you don't have to forgive them. you don't have to ever speak to them again. you can be angry with them until you die if you want.
but society cannot function if we don't allow them to move on. to change their behavior and fuck off somewhere else and build meaningful relationships without bothering you again. we need a path for people to change, or nothing ever will.
#like re: the last post#npd SHOULDNT mean 'youre an abusive person'#but also people who have abused people in the past can still become better people in the present#you know?#and as i metioned vaguely in that post. the way we currently treat people with NPD probably CAUSES THEM to lash out at and abuse others#if u abuse someone they lash back out at you and suddenly theres fun mutual abuse happening#so they need a way out of that cycle
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not to sound like a boomer, but I need some people to learn how to write emails in a semi-professional (at the very least) format so you're not cold emailing a business/potential employer/any other stranger about formal matters in the exact same way you'd DM a close friend on instagram
the formality/language can loosen up in the email chain once you've established a rapport and you match the other person if they're being less formal, but please don't have the very first email you send a stranger be written in all lowercase ultra-casual sms slang with no greeting or signature and a billion emojis
#this sounds like a 'argh kids these days doing [insert exaggerated story they don't actually do in reality]' kind of thing#except that I've gotten soooo many emails like this#there's a reason that I don't have my DMs open on any socmed and it's bc they attract people getting way too casual/parasocial immediately#and forcing people to write out an email both filters out 90% of weird impulse messages and also throws them out of that casual headspace#except that I can actively tell when this fails and someone is treating emails as if they're the same thing as DMs
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idk y’all should treat fat men better. and i don’t mean mildly chubby guys i mean honest-to-god love-handles-and-double-chins fat guys. stop calling them shit like discord mods or gross weebs or nasty creeps or neckbeards or that they’re stinky or sweaty or beer bellied or whatever else. fatphobia isn’t cute, even repackaged in a neat little box of “ew men”
#and this isn’t some like “IF A CUTE GUY HARASSES A GIRL SHED LOVE IT BUT WHEN A FAT GUY DOES IT SHED HATE IT”#I guarantee she’d hate it nontheless#just saying that the way some of y’all treat fat guys is seriously disgusting#and a lot of em end up falling down the incel and rightwing pipelines because of it#fatphobia#antimasculism#fatphobes#male fatphobia#transandrophobia#anti transmasculinity#emo moss talks
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DEVASTATING the lyric you've been mishearing is better than the real one
#i've been listening to icarus by bastille#and for some reason my brain fills in 'this is how it feels to take a fall' as 'this is how it feels to take off all your skin'#and like fuck man#and I KNOW that’s technically not a misheard lyric but my post my rules cope#anyway my line now#also probably phrased this poorly but its ok#im allowed to be incomprehensible#as a treat#and then fuckin#from we sink by of monsters and men#the original line was 'please look away dont look at me'#and i kept hearing it as 'please learn a way to look at me'#anyway#shoving this post in the queue but please be aware that i am writing it very late at night#q
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Y'all have got to stop virulently hating men. Like, I'm sorry, I fucking hate the patriarchy too, but the patriarchy isn't just men and saying it is just exculpates complicit women. I am the mother of a young boy, and I look at this precious, empathetic 8 year old boy I'm raising and I don't know where online is safe for him. Places like this will say he's evil just for his gender, and other places will say "we'll be your friend if you hate with us," and still others will radicalize him in other ways. Where is he supposed to go? Why are we saying the radicalization is the fault of the kids just trying to find a place to hang?
Like this is seriously getting urgent. You have got to fucking stop conflating the patriarchy and men. 53% percent of white women voted for Trump. Men aren't the problem. White supremacy and Christian patriarchal structures are two examples of patriarchy-reinforcing structures that aren't solely couched in maleness. Men aren't the problem, and pretending they are drives more men into more welcoming extremist spaces and also ignores all the parts of this that are forwarded by people who aren't men.
What I see happening all over is scared, depressed, lonely people looking for someone they're allowed to hate automatically, unquestioningly - someone they're allowed to place all the blame on. Fascism says people of color, non-Christian people, queer people, etc., are the ones they're allowed to hate.
And way too many of yall answer that no, it's leftist to hate men instead. You are doing *the exact same thing they are.*
Fucking knock it off.
The answer is we're not supposed to hate anyone automatically based on their immutable personal characteristics. Hate the specific people who've hurt you. Hate the self-reinforcing systems that let them get away with hurting you. Hate the strangers who prop up those systems. Hate the fascists. Hell knows I hate Donald Trump, but it's not because he's a man, it's because he's a piece of shit.
Hate the pieces of shit, not the gender.
But don't hate men just because they're men. That's unhelpful, stupid, insane, and entirely counterproductive. Fucking. Stop.
#unforth rambles#politics#the way people are treating that one dude on that post makes me sick#if you think some monolith called Men is the problem#then congratulations you are more of a problem than many men#this is why terfism is gonna grow after this election and some of yall will fall for it hook line and sinker#the moment you decide an entire biological group can be classified as the bad ones#you stop being part of the solution and you are not my ally
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“Allow Me to Demonstrate” aka Reviewer Husk has me at a chokehold, the way I screamed in my heart 😭 now here is a memorialized version of it beCAUSE ITS SO SOFFFFTTT IM DE C E A S E D D D D 🩷
#the way that Husk is so sweet to Angel and treats him so lovingly and the way they both pin for eachother shakkskwowowleasl#huskerdust#hazbin hotel husk#hazbin angel dust#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel comic
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High-ish quality scans of the Silco & Vander pages from the artbook
#the passage abt how Silco was the only one willing to do anything to not be treated like he was dirty#UGH vander being the only person that didn't think of him that way and then trying to drown him in the lake like an animal#in trying to earn himself respect he lost the only person who didn't see him like something dirty#also on a less depressing note he was fruity af looking bye#arcane#arcane artbook#arcane season 2#arcane spoilers#silco#vander#silco arcane#vander arcane#zaundads#vanco
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Hot take and not to be a killjoy or the shipping police but people treating Viktor or Jinx's aroace headcanons as if they were canon is not the revolutionary take people think it is.
Headcanons are always all right but we have to acknowledge that they are somehow damaging when they apply to stereotypes. It might not be the case for everyone but most of the time people unconsciously assume that disability/mental illness=asexuality. These headcanons erase the freedom of attraction from people who are already seen as unable to have sexual/romantic experiences/desires, when it's completely untrue and harmful.
You can headcanon Viktor and Jinx as aroace, but I have seen people changing their minds once Viktor is no longer disabled (s2 with all of his other forms) and Jinx is no longer as mentally ill (alternate universe Powder). And it speaks wonders of how people see these characters.
"I never thought about Jinx being able to feel romantic/sexual attraction until s2!" To believe she's actually only capable of that when she's not "damaged" is incredibly disturbing. Especially since Jinx has always had a bit of a flirty personality too.
"I've always seen Viktor as asexual, I don't know why!" That's fine. You can headcanon him as ace. But I believe there is a reason behind it, most of the time, if for some inexplicable reason the "vibes" of the disabled character are making you think he's ace.
I say all of this being aroaspec myself, by the way. Headcanon all you want but going to people's posts commenting how "it's weird for you that they have romantic/sexual plots when they're clearly aroace" is not a win at all. It's a headcanon, after all, and it should be treated as such, and that's fine. But it also is damaging to spread stereotypes like these.
Of course the disabled character is asexual. Of course the mentally ill character is aromantic. It's not as revolutionary as you might think, tbh.
Fandom is not activism and it's all right to have any headcanons you want BUT some of them are filled with damaging stuff and perhaps we should look into ourselves more before treating these assumptions as something canon.
#i hope i didn't sound rude btw i am saying this respectfully and this is directed to the ones who push these hcs as canon#if you have your own theories and know abt aroace stereotypes but are respectful abt it this is not for you keep scrolling#i actually think showing jinx (who has been dehumanized by the fandom A LOT) in a romantic relationship is good for her character#and viktor letting himself be free and loving what he considered imperfections thanks to jayce at the end c'monnn they need to make love#tired of disabled characters being treated as babies and always hc them as aroace let them fuck#this being said i am aware there are more terms inside aroace etc etc etc and there are more ways of considering them aroace etc etc etc#this is NOT about that it's about being aware of how 'mmm it's the vibes!' argument does NOT work when it's stereotypes#it's like saying 'wow this robotic character is giving me autistic vibes idk why' LIKE CMON NOW WEFNEWLFNL YOU KNOW WHY#please don't cancel me i am giving my humble opinion as someone aroaspec#at the end of the day you can do whatever the fuck you want tbh#i'm not the shipping police here#arcane#viktor arcane#jinx arcane#jayvik#timebomb
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Nassau County of Long Island, New York passed a mask ban bill today. Please make a habit of calling your city, county, state, and federal representatives expressing your opposition to mask bans because fascist legislative proposals like this is absolutely going to be domino effecting throughout the US. AND WEAR A MASK IN PUBLIC. WEAR A MASK TO NOT ONLY PROTECT US, BUT SUPPORT US.
Editing to add (8/14/2024): Please read the recent update.
#i watched the whole hearing on livestream and I'm absolutely APPALLED by the way the people that were against the bill were treated.#us politics#covid#covid isn't over#covid pandemic#covid is airborne#covid awareness#link(s) provided#twitter#edit (8/14/24): im so fucking tired. they need to be sued.
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one of the very few to show the batch kindness back on kamino
#the bad batch#tbb hunter#tbb crosshair#tbb tech#tbb wrecker#tbb#the bad batch season 3#tbb s3#sergeant hunter#shaak ti#star wars#star wars the bad batch#sw tbb#i just love the idea of the batch getting particularly attached to the jedi/shaak to specifically bc they’re the only people that have—#treated them w respect#bc oboviously they weren’t getting that from the regs or the kaminoans#anyway#yeah#ALSO love the cadet batch#there’s a lot more of them on the way lol#i got a bit obsessed#mods art#mods draws#my art
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the thing about some men is that they want you to remember, at all times, that you are underneath them. that with one word or look or "joke", you will stay beneath them. that even "exceptions" to the rule are not true exceptions - the commonly cited statistic that one in eight men believe they could win against serena williams.
women's gymnastics is often not seen as real gymnastics. whatever the fuck non-euclidian horrors rhythmic gymnasts are capable of, it's often tamped down as being not a sport. some of the most dominant athletes in the world are women. nobody watches women's soccer. despite years of dancing and being built like a fucking brick, men always assume they're faster and stronger than i am. you wouldn't like what happens when they are incorrect. once while drunk at a guy's house i won a held-plank challenge by a solid minute. the party was over after that - he became exceedingly violent.
what i mean is that you can be perfect, and they still think you're ... lacking, somehow. i hope you understand i'm trying to express a neutral statement when i say: taylor swift was the possibly the most patriarchy-palatable, straight-down-the-line woman we could churn out. she is white, conventionally attractive, usually pretty mild in personality. say what you will about her (and you should, she's a billionaire, she can handle it), but a few things seem to be true about her: 1. she can write a damn catchy song, and 2. the eras tour truly was a massive commercial success and was also genuinely an impressive feat of human athleticism and performance.
i don't know if she deserves the title of "woman of the year," i'm not debating that in this post. what i am saying is that she was named Woman of The Year, and then an untalented man got onstage at the golden globes and made fun of her for attending her boyfriend's football games. what i am saying is that this woman altered local economies - and her dating life is still being made into a "harmless" punchline. the camera panned, greedy, over to her downing a full glass of champagne. congratulations taylor! you are woman of the year! but you are a woman. even her.
fuck, man. write better material.
a guy gets onstage at a college graduation and despite the fact like half the crowd is made up of women, he spends a significant proportion of it warning these people - who spent possibly hundreds of thousands of dollars on their education - that they were lied to. that the "real" meaning of femininity is motherhood. that they shouldn't rest on the laurels of that education-they-paid-for but instead throw it away to kneel at a man's heel. imagine that. sweating in your godawful polyester gown (that you also had to pay for!), fresh out of 4 years of pushing yourself ever-harder: and some guy you've never met - who knows nothing about you - he reminds you this "win" is a pyrrhic one at best. you really shouldn't consider yourself that extraordinary. you're still a woman, even after years of study.
god forbid you are not a pretty woman, but if you are pretty, you must be dumb. god forbid you are not ablebodied or white or cis or straight or good at swallowing. you must be beneath a man, or else they are not a man. the equation for masculinity seems to just be: that which is not a woman or womanly (god forbid). anything "feminine" is thereby anathema. to engage in "feminine" things such as therapy, getting a hug from a friend, or crying - it is giving up ones manhood. therefore women need to be put in their place to ensure that masculinity is protected.
this is something i have struggled to explain to terfs - they are not doing the work of feminism, but rather the patriarchy. by asserting that women and men must be (on some secret level) oppositional and in conflict, they also assume that being a woman is akin to being another species. but bigotry does not stem from observational truths or clarity - that is what makes it bigotry. there was nothing in my childhood that made me fundamentally different from my brother. we are treated differently nonetheless. to assert there is some biological drive that enforces my gender role is to assert that women have a gendered role. men do not see women as equal to them not because of biological reality - but instead because the core tenant of the patriarchy is that women aren't full, realized people.
we are told from a very young age to excuse misbehavior as a single man's choice - not all men. it is not all men, just that one guy. all women are gold-digging bitches who belong in the kitchen - but if a man is mean, bigoted, or violent to you, it's just that particular guy, and that means nothing about men-as-a-whole. it is only one guy who got mad when you gently rejected him. it is only one guy who warns her this trophy is heavy, are you sure you can hold it? it is only one guy who smashes her face into the cake. it is only one guy talking into a mic about hating our bodily autonomy.
i have just found that they often wait until the moment we actually seem to be upstaging them. you sit in a meeting where you're presenting your own findings and he says get me a coffee? or you run to the end of the marathon and are about to finish first and he pushes your kids out in front of you. you win the chess game and they make some comment akin to well, you're ugly away. we can be the billionaire and get the dream life and finally fucking do it and yet! still! they have this strange, visceral urge to say well actually, if you think you're so great -
it's not one just one guy. it's one in eight.
#posting my drafts#i want to stress im a taylor swift enjoyer. sorry.#also if someone wants to venmo me for the radfem hate i get daily i need like 60 bucks#someone stole my taylor swift official merch quarter zip :(#the point im specifically making in the tswift paragraphs i hope is clear which is like.#taylor is not threatening their ideas of masculinity or femininity. she is incredibly milquetoast. i mean i love her#but there's nothing about her that challenges the status quo. EXCEPT for her success.#and that's what pisses so many men off: the success.#so if THE VISION of white heteropatriarchy STILL is being treated this way.....#what do you think is happening to minority populations??#i just feel like be annoyed w/her about real things but being weird about her dating someone is like#soooooooooooooooooooooo fucking annoying. like ya know????#[said with the knowledge i need you to be soooo normal about how you interpret this entire piece and also these tags]
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。゚゚・。・゚゚。 ゚. April will bring blessings.
゚・。・゚
#let’s manifest this shit!#I need for you to do what you do best April: be kind and bring on the blessings <3#april#blessings#text#classic academia#light academia aesthetic#spring aesthetic#positivity#cottagecore#cozycore#cosycore#affirmations#positive#wholesome#manifesting#manifestation#emoji#heart#spring#hope April treats u the way you deserve <3
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“girlcock” this, “girlcock” that. what if I want to watch the corner of her eyes crinkle when she talks about the tv show she likes. what if I want her to be able to confide in me the things she never felt safe enough to tell anyone else.
#you guys will do anything but treat trans women as humans rather than a sex object#wanting to fuck someone isn’t allyship. by the way
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People who get so heated about the toshiro-laios fight that they think toshiro genuinely hates laios are incredibly silly to me like. yes laios gets on his nerves and the fight came about because toshiro let a lot of annoyance simmer for a LONG time instead of expressing his feelings but once that tension resolves through their stupid fight he is able to see more clearly and realise he does not HATE laios, he ENVIES him. It just seems like such a blatantly obvious part of his character that people just can't grasp for some reason?? You don't hate someone and then talk to them about your unsaid feeling for his sister and give him a bell to ring if he needs you. You can dislike whatever characters you want but I can't stand when people mischaracterise characters to such a huge extent. Learn some basic media literacy.
#dungeon meshi#toshiro nakamoto#shuro dungeon meshi#dunmeshi spoilers#dungeon meshi spoilers#i would make a post about how people treating toshiro like a farcille obstacle just rob falin of her agency and her personality but that#post would be way too long
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It's really cool that, as a 6+ foot tall autistic trans woman, I have to tiptoe around and whisper and make myself as small as possible at work lest all my tme coworkers treat me like a threat.
The fun thing is, of course, the only real threat here is the very real threat of very real violence contained within the fact that any of them could get me fired for breathing wrong and then I'll never be able to work for the city again.
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