#from we sink by of monsters and men

[nonebinary-leftbeef]

DEVASTATING the lyric you've been mishearing is better than the real one

[i-drop-level-one-loot]

*NSFW* The mating habits of Yandere! Animal-Human Monsters

Yandere!Monster men who sometimes forget that their poor darling is a human and misinterprets their actions when it comes to mating. Short drabbles about yanderes trying to seduce their darlings, but the list gets progressively darker the further down you read.

*Warning* dub-con, non-con, yandere possessiveness, dead dove

Yandere!Crow Harpy who was a little disappointed when you refused to move out of your house. You didn't understand why the feathered man seemed so infatuated with you, but after a long while of him begging you to move in with him you agreed, only on the condition that he moved into your home. It wasn't a traditional harpy relationship, but he was ecstatic regardless, deciding that if he couldn't build a nest with you he could at least win your favor as a perfect mate by decorating it. It got on your nerves sometimes, coming home from work to find shiny bits of trash and feathers tucked into every nook and cranny of your home. Eventually the two of you created a list of acceptable "treasure" to bring home, and what you considered to be actual garbage. He spent weeks "decorating" your already furnished house, before one day pulling you into the living room where he had piled every blanket and pillow you owned into a makeshift nest on the floor. His smile was insecure, desperate for your approval as he wrapped you into his large wings, holding you tightly against his warm body before sinking down into the mass of fluffy objects. You could hear his heart hammering against his chest erratically as he gently began placing kisses against your collar.

"I wanted to help build a home with you, so it wasn't yours or mine, but ours. I pray that my attempts to prove I'll keep you and our future children comfortable impressed you..."

Yandere!Merman who couldn't help but feel awestruck by your beauty, often going on long rants about how much you inspire him. It was a chance encounter while you were studying abroad, and you grew emotionally attached to the beautiful man who sang you words of praise. Although he whined whenever you had to leave the beach, the bags under his eyes became deeper as the weeks went on, chronic exhaustion taking it's toll on the merman. Whenever you tried to convince him that his sleep was important, he would only give a dopey smile, responding cryptically about how his secret project was just as important as spending time with you, and that he would have time to sleep once it was all over. One day when you arrived on the beach he was already there, shaking with excitement and impatiently trying to drag you into the ocean before you could get on your snorkeling gear. Deep where the sun barely touched, a huge intricate mural was sculpted into the ocean floor. As your eyes widened in an attempt to take in just how massive the artwork was, following each perfectly symmetrical swirl, two strong arms snaked around your waist with a tired, yet content, sigh. He blew words into your ear that you were somehow able to understand despite the water, as he sunk with you into the middle of the circular masterpiece.

"You take my breath away every time we meet, and I wanted to do the same for you. Please say that, if you could, you would lie here in my arms forever.."

Yandere!Puppy-Hybrid who was always just a ball of energy, a hyperactive sweet heart who couldn't sit still when he was awake. Most of your days together, it was easy to forget that he could even have urges, with how innocent your relationship was, kisses and cuddles but nothing more. As a species who had mating cycles, although he would never tell you out loud, he was always waiting for you to go into heat. But it was taking so long! He did such a good job being a patient boy for you, you didn't even know why he was being so whiny lately, attributing his neediness to his attention seeking personality. But eventually, he took your phone to do some research. At first he was shocked, humans didn't have mating cycles?? How did you know when it was time to make a baby? Then he came across an amazing discovery. Ovulation. It took a couple of months, holding your belly to his face and breathing deeply for a couple of minutes each day, but he finally learned the subtle changes in your scent throughout your cycle. You had no idea what was going on, thinking he was just being extra goofy lately, until he refused to let go one day, tightening his grasp as his breathing turned into heavy pants, grinding your leg in between his.

"Ah.. you can't hide it from me.. I've been waiting for this for so long... Please don't say no..."

Yandere!Humanoid Spider who always did his best to never frighten you. Even when you first met, it was with him holding his hands up and pleading for you not to run away from him in a soothing voice. Despite the lower half of the creature you met in the forest being a giant spider, the top half was such a kind and handsome man that you quickly began to trust him, soon considering him to be a good friend. He was so thoughtful, always raising his hands as a show of surrender, whether he was approaching you from afar and didn't want to startle you or if you were jokingly fighting over something silly. Even amongst humans, he was the one you trusted the most. If you had known anything about spiders though, you would have been more on guard with his overt displays of feebleness, especially after he began telling you how beautiful you were. You didn't even fight back at first when he suddenly grabbed you from, until he bit into your neck. The kind man, no, the monster you thought you knew, wasted no time sliding your pants down as he still held your backside to his chest, chuckling into your shoulder.

"Ah, my stupid little human~ Were you just pretending to be that naive because you wanted me to take you? ❤️"

Yandere!Naga who couldn't feel love in the same way that humans did. As a researcher working towards her doctorate specializing in Naga people and their many sub species, you were overjoyed to meet a small tribe of Naga men who were willing to allow you to enter their home and record their daily lives. There were so many types of Nagas loosely related to snake species still alive today, and they each had their own cultures, languages, and biology. Based on the coloration you couldn't tell what type these men were, but despite not being fluent in their language they were very kind to you. They seemed to have been in a period of mourning before you arrived, and lavished all their attention on you, babbling on in one sided conversations you could only understand a few words of here and there. One phrase they all stated was flattering only for the first few times they repeated it, but quickly became unnerving as they became more comfortable caressing your face and running their fingers through your hair. And when they pulled you into the center of a giant nest, taking turns thrusting their long tongues down your throat and running their hands over your body, trapping you in a pile of cold men staring deep into your soul with hungry eyes, you learned the species they were closest to.

"We need you... We need you..."

Yandere!Humanoid Scorpion who rescued you after a tourist attraction went arry, promising to protect you until you could be rescued. A strong, bulky man who enjoyed holding you (almost too tightly) in his arms whenever his peers came near. Everything was honestly lovely until in the black of night you were awoken by a strange chorus of sounds echoing outside the burrow the hybrids allowed you to sleep in. A blue light illuminated the large home, and as it noticed you finally woke, approached, revealing himself to be the scorpion man who rescued you, glowing with bioluminescence. Before you could ask what was happening, fear struck you like a bolt of lightening seeing a large, inhuman cock emerging from just below his human half. He lunged forward, and you threw up your hands in self defence. Your hands intertwined with his, fighting against him with all of your strength, but the harder you fought, the more excited he grew. You pushed and pulled, but he didn't loosen his hold on you. Eventually it seemed he had enough playing, and threw you effortlessly onto the bed. Tears streamed down your face at your helplessness, but this only widened his smile as he peeled the shirt off your sweaty body.

"There is no need to fear, my mate. As you can see, no one can match my strength. You and our brood shall be safe under my protection.."

Yandere!Humanoid Waterbug disgusted you, from the twitch of his antenna to the flirtatiousness of his voice. The moment you met him on the water of your lake house, there was no escape. Every time you left or returned back home he was effortlessly skating across the waters surface towards you, begging you to come closer. Although you did your best to ignore him, his loud cries for attention eventually wore you down. Maybe if you entertained him just this once he would leave you alone? You approached him calmly, but as soon as you were within reach he grasped your hands tightly, pulling you partially into the water. He spoke sickly sweet words of affection, chilling you more painfully than the cold morning lake water. You tried to turn him down politely, gently pulling at his grip. He pulled you into the water further, swiftly pushing the two of you away from the shore in one kick of his legs, his unamused gaze no longer holding the playful, flirty gleam it had before. One set of hands held yours tightly, while another pair grabbed your head shoving it without warning under the water. You struggled against his grasp, rapidly losing oxygen as you panicked, black spots filling your vision. But before you lost consciousnesses, he brought you back up, still staring into your eyes with cold fury as your lungs felt like they caught fire. He confessed his love again, but when you began sobbing he thrust you face forward into the water again with a painful smack, holding you down beneath him until stopped struggling. In the air once more, snot flowed and mixed freely with your tears as he aggressively smashed his face into yours, fishing out your tongue and biting it harshly.

"There's only one correct answer to my question, (Reader).. Be mine, or die. If I can't have you, then no one can."

Yandere!Marsupial Hybrid you never saw coming. Lost in the Australian outback, you cursed yourself and your impossibly terrible luck. Hybrids and monsters freely roaming the world were terrifying enough, but being in the land where even the greenery was planted by Satan himself? Your phone had lost it's signal about two hours ago, and your jeep died shortly after that. Trudging along by foot, you continuously felt eyes following your every step, and the fear that a giant spider or monster snake was stalking you made you cry for hours as you walked under the merciless sun. On top of the heat and new blisters forming on your soles, you had to use a restroom as well. Quickly surveying the tall bushes to make sure you weren't about to go next to one of Satan's previously mentioned bushes, you pulled down your shorts in discomfort. The feeling of eyes on you hadn't left since your vehicle randomly gave out despite being double checked before you left the city, but your bladder couldn't care at that moment. A rustle nearby ended your attempt to go before it started, pulling up your shorts so fast it hurt. A hybrid with round ears and a lung brown tail with white spots charged into you, knocking you down. His face was red and slick with tears and sweat, his eyes wide and frantic as he latched his sharp teeth into your neck with excitement. Everything was so fast, with his alternating between feverish rambling and biting into whatever part of your flesh he could reach as he tore off your clothes with a desperation you couldn't comprehend. Tears blended with your own as he kissed, licked and bit every piece of you as he fought your legs open, ignoring your screams of pain.

"You accepted me didn't you?! You knew I chose you! Ah, it hurts! Why'd you put your clothes back o-ah! I need you, I need you now!"

[cherubfae]

𝔱𝔥𝔦𝔠𝔨 𝔱𝔥𝔦𝔠𝔨 𝔱𝔥𝔦𝔠𝔨 || {𝔪𝔲𝔩𝔱𝔦𝔣𝔞𝔫𝔡𝔬𝔪}

In thick dick we trust

|| 𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐔𝐁𝐅𝐀𝐄'𝐒 𝐇𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐍 𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 ||

tags: smut, NSFW, fem!reader, breeding, blowjobs, fingering, slight angst/fix-it-fic and spoilers for JJK (Gojo), predator/prey dynamics, public sex, no foreplay (in some), monster fucking, belly bulge, impossible standards but we can dream, unprotected sex, slight dubcon (pyramid head), this is a trail mix of all sorts of some of my favorite men (and my bestie's)!!. Pls enjoy!!

leon's is a bit short bc he's got a halloween treat comin' up ;D

Leon

"This is not a good idea." Leon's voice hisses next to your ear. Ever the hypocrite, he's not one to heed his own warning. He is far too focused on tugging his pants half-way down his ass, panting hotly at your ear, the clasps of his belt jingling together as he frees his swollen cock. His fingers push into your hole, messily stretching you out. Knowing you two don't have much time, he pulled them out after, lapping at your essence with a pleased moan. "So fuckin' good, princess."

Sinking into you with a guttural groan, Leon snaps his hips into you. His shirt is messily pulled up to his abdomen, biting his lip to conceal any moans. You back your ass up, meeting his thrusts as quickly and most importantly, as quietly as possible.

"I know this is rushed but you gotta try to relax for me, baby." He kisses just below your ear. "You were the one who wanted to fuck at a Halloween party, right? I promise I'll take care of you as much as you need me to when we're home... But for now, loosen up that pussy for this cock you love so much, yeah?" He breathily chuckles.

Zayne

"You're too bold for your own good...," His lashes flutter, his head falling back to rest on his chair. Legs widening, Zayne's breath stutters out of him the deeper you take his rigid length. "Doing such a thing like this in a place of healthcare practice and to a renowned surgeon no less. How naughty."

His heart stutters at your intense gaze between his parted thighs. Pulling off his cock, he can see how his length and your lips glisten with precum and saliva. "You say that... But were you not the one who fingered me to sleep last time I was here?" You smirk as Zayne's ears flush red.

"You said you needed help sleeping... Orgasms can provide that. When all of your muscles are tight during sexual arousal, an orgasm helps relaxes those muscles." Came his clinical response, despite both of you knowing you'd successfully cornered him. You grip his cock once more, relishing in how his hips jerk upwards.

Lapping at his tip, you grin. "And that's what I'm doing just now. My favorite doctor said he needed help relaxing-- and I think this is just what the doctor prescribed." The groan Zayne let out as you lowered your mouth onto him was music to your ears.

Sal Fisher

After your very first successful Halloween party in your new shared apartment, you and Sal giggle and hush one another, messily pulling off each other's costumes. You, a witch and Sal, a skeleton (or as he worded it, your 'willing victim'). With Chase Atlantic playing rhythmically from Sal's old stereo, he pushes you gently onto the soft bed.

Mask left forgotten and his glass eye already out of his socket and cleaning in a cup at his bedside table next to his tiny suction device. You couldn't help but adore him, staring up at him tenderly. You loved that he was able to be so comfortable with you like this. You supposed knowing him since high school and dating since sophomore year helped!

You reach up and cup his scarred cheeks, running your thumb above his missing nose. Sal closes his good eye, breath warm on your palm. He kisses your fingers, covering your hand with his. The passionate energy takes a softer turn, gently pulling off your clothing until you were both laid bare.

"I will never get over how beautiful you are." Sal murmured, his cold hands cupping the swell of your breasts, thumb circling the hardened nipple. His thick cock, surrounded by blue hair, nudges between your folds, though he is no rush to enter. Leaning down, he kisses you softly, an action you readily return.

Pyramid Head

You were easy to corner. It was laughable, really. Pyramid Head couldn't ignore those sweltering feelings any longer. The thrill of hunting you down like small prey had thrilled him to no end. He was sick of those nurses and the mannequins. He wanted something real, someone warm.

The scrape of his Great Knife splitting through concrete and asphalt grated on your ears. Wedging his knife into the crease of the segmented sidewalk, Pyramid Head backs you up against the fence. He towers above you; he has no visible eyes to look at, only the cold, rusted and bloody triangular helmet that presses against your cheek.

A shuddering, inhuman growl bellows like iron rubbing together, followed by a rather curious huff. Something hard pokes at your tummy and your eyes widen, heat rising to your cheeks. This thing... This humanoid embodiment of hate was rock hard, rutting his large erection against the seam of your jeans. His hands grapple for your shoulders, huffing demonically again. Impatient.

Seeing no other choice and admittedly, you were a bit curious. It certainly had been quite some time since someone had craved anything of you. And from what you could see of the great Pyramid Head, your curiosity had been thoroughly piqued.

Shimming your jeans and underwear down, you yelp as Pyramid Head hauls you into his strong arms. One arm barred across your lower back, his large blood covered hand spreads open your folds. Then, the fattest tip you've ever seen pokes out from under his dirtied apron; sliding up your folds to collect your wetness. He rubs himself against you messily, his hand moving to lock at your elbow, keeping you in place.

With immense searing heat, he pushes his thick, swollen cock into your tight channel. You feel like you're floating, your head knocking back against the fence. You could feel him stretch you impossibly wide, your tummy extending ever so slightly, and with the frantic upwards cant of his hips, you knew that the beast was far from done.

Gojo Satoru

He was here. He was home. Sukuna was dead. Defeated. The strongest had once again prevailed. Satoru had made it back to you alive.

Satoru approaches you like you were a newborn deer, power thrummed off of him. He'd let his infinity down. You weren't sure what you looked like in that moment, but you imagined he was mirroring your expression back at you. His snow-white hair was messily disheveled, his lips in a wobbly, uncertain smile and his eyes-- those endless ocean eyes. They looked like rippling waves with the more tears that filled them and spilled over, clearing paths on his dirty cheeks.

"I'm home, honey." Satoru spoke hoarsely, trembling as he gathers you in his arms. Instantly, his face finds its home at your neck, breathing in your scent. "I'm home." His grip tightened.

After hours of snuggling up on the sofa and Satoru freshly showered, you along with him--neither of you could bear to be apart from the other right now. You curled into his embrace, his arms wrapped around you like a safety belt, his long fingers brush the waistband of yours, his, sweatpants. Satoru kissed your jaw.

"Is it okay, pretty? I--," Voice breaking, Satoru swallowed thickly. "I need to know this isn't a dream." Nodding, you shift your hips up, helping him push your sweatpants and underwear down. Satoru does the same, gently swirling his pink head against your folds.

Leaning into his embrace, you grip his arms, making him look at you. "I don't need prep, 'Toru. I wanna feel you too. Want it just like this, please?" Cupping his cheek, he leans into your touch and nods understandingly. Guiding himself into you, the two of you gasp. Your fingers thread together tightly, slowly rocking into each other. Reunited once again. <3

Cloud

It was no secret that Cloud could be quite socially awkward. When he wasn't thinking about his next payment, the free estate of his mind more than often drifted to you. It was rare for him to not have you by his side, but you'd had your own mission to attend to.

Mako-blue eyes drift to his lap, feeling the subtle twitch in his black trousers. He'd been throbbing for days on end now, but rather than dealing with it he willed it to leave on its own. Pleasure always felt better when it was shared with you, after all. But thinking of you only served to make his cock harden more.

Hissing, Cloud shoved his bottoms down far enough for his swollen member to pop up, slapping wetly against his bare stomach; a string of sticky pre connecting his skin to his reddened tip. With a growl, he wrapped his hand tightly around the base of his thick cock and squeezed his eyes shut tight, doing his best to mimic how you felt around him.

He could still feel the phantom touches as you traced your fingers up to his tip and down to his base, moving your hand to cup and fondle at his heavy balls, every touch of yours was like you were worshipping a beautiful lost god.

"Shit--fuck, baby!" Cloud gasps, hips jerking into his fist, cum squirting out of him until his knuckles were dripping in it. He'd really been too pent up... He couldn't wait til you were home. He misses you. :(

Bonus for the sillies<3

Astarion

"Shhhhhh, darling...," Astarion hushes into your mouth, making you snort back at him. The two of you drunkenly giggle, a little more than pleasantly buzzed, and chat with each other out in the hall of the inn in what you two think were whispers. "Can't wake the others. Do you have the key?" He hiccups softly, leaning his chin on your shoulder, making your hunt for the room key that much more difficult.

You grin and pull the key out of your chest bandages, winking. Astarion purred approvingly. Leaning your forehead onto the door, you narrow your eyes and focus on trying to hold it steady, struggling to line the key up with the doorknob. Behind you, Astarion snickers like a schoolboy.

"You don't struggle this much guiding me into you... Has a door bested you, love?" He slurrs, nuzzling at your arm like an affectionate cat. You scowl and playfully and softly place your entire hand on his face and ease him back.

"Ack!" Astarion sputtered, blinking with annoyance as you unlock the door triumphantly. You enter first, the spawn stumbling in behind you. He makes for the bed first, leaving a trail of clothing behind him and crawling atop the sheets. Propping his cheek up with his palm, he relaxes into an attempt to look seductive, which wasn't hard. His thick cock, however, was quickly becoming so. Everything about him was ethereally beautiful, even in your drunken haze.

You squint at him, weighing your options as best you could with your inebriated state. If the two of you started fucking, the chances of either waking up another inn guest or resulting in some sort of drunken injury were quite high.

Ultimately, you decide it's not a good idea, as delicious as Astarion looked. You shed your boots and sit on the edge of the bed. The spawn pouts, reminding you of a cat once again as he paws at your backside.

"Don't you want to, love? We can snuggle instead if that's your desired passion." Astarion wiggled himself under your arms. You smile, brushing back his bangs to kiss his forehead. "We should wait 'til we're both sober, honey." Astarion nuzzled himself against your bosom.

Easing you both back onto the bed, Astarion cuddles into you. The both of you pass out, the spawn entirely naked at your side and you; half-dressed and half-off the bed in a starfish spread, mouth wide open in a snore.

|| ᴘʟᴇᴀꜱᴇ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ʀᴇᴘᴏꜱᴛ, ʀᴇᴜꜱᴇ, ᴏʀ ᴇᴅɪᴛ ᴍʏ ᴡᴏʀᴋꜱ ɪɴ ᴀɴʏ ᴡᴀʏ! ɪ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ɢɪᴠᴇ ᴘᴇʀᴍɪꜱꜱɪᴏɴ. ᴛᴜᴍʙʟʀ ɪꜱ ᴛʜᴇ ᴏɴʟʏ ꜱɪᴛᴇ ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ ɪ ᴘᴏꜱᴛ. ᴀʟʟ ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀꜱ ʙᴇʟᴏɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇɪʀ ʀɪɢʜᴛꜰᴜʟ ᴏᴡɴᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴛᴏʀʏ ʙᴇʟᴏɴɢꜱ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ © ᴄʜᴇʀᴜʙꜰᴀᴇ 2024 ||

[manikas-whims]

LADS men + Halloween Costumes

Now with Sylus solo banner upcoming, the possibility of getting a Halloween quad banner is nil. And i’m happy for it cuz this has saved me from making a really bad financial decision 😆

anyways here's some mulling over the LIs costume choices..

SYLUS

Option 1: Vampire

If we consider Sylus’s overall aesthetic, then Vampire is the most obvious choice for him. He can't go out in the daylight for some inexplicable reason; definitely a creature of the night. He has red eyes that glow in the dark. And even during Destiny Café interactions, he playfully sinks his teeth into your palm. No doubt he'd enjoy sinking them more into your neck 🤭

Also like imagine a 5 star Sylus Halloween card where MC begins suspecting Sylus to be a vampire. And the whole card revolves around her trying to collect evidence. Even Luke and Keiran begin to suspect Sylus thanks to MC and the 3 join forces. The card ends with Sylus playfully scolding all of them 😆 and laughing in disbelief, in that deep cadence that he has 😊

Option 2: Demon

Another obvious choice. If not a vampire, then the red eyes and dark aesthetic are also quite befitting for a Demon attire. A very charming demon who lures you into sinning by offering his black card 🤭 and ofcourse you willingly sell your soul to him.

Option 3: Bounty Hunter

You know those charming sorts of outlaws that everyone loves and roots for? Yeah, that would fit so well with Sylus. Especially the steampunk aesthetic. So yeah..a steampunk style, bounty hunter Sylus with an array of weapons strapped all over. He only works solo but will definitely make an exception for you 😌

Option 4: Crow

Unlike the other two, this option involves a big, poofy bird suit. A crow outfit to be specific. And he looks simply adorable in it 🥺 Imagine yourself trying not to laugh as you sneakily take millions of photos of him in this outfit 🤭 while he sneers at you but there's no actual anger behind his gaze.

XAVIER

Option 1: Werewolf

It may sound unusual upon first thought but this will play so well into his overall persona of the “wolf in sheep's clothing” or “wolf in bunny clothing”. He did nibble on your finger and sniffed your scent in the No Restraint card. And I'm damn sure he has a thing for biting and marking. So just imagine him putting on the wolf ears, claws and fangs, and he starts acting more sly than ever, saying he's only playing the part 😉

Option 2: Royalty

Another obvious choice. Xavier is pretty used to this cause he is royalty afterall. So assuming a position of power comes easy to him (remember Floral Blessing?). Maybe some sort of chivalrous and gallant prince because he can easily add his swordplay skills to it. Seeing him regard you as his queen will be a treat sweeter than all the candies 😌

Option 3: Lumiere

You think it's the most hilarious inside joke— Lumiere hiding in plain sight amidst the crowd of Linkon on one night where a large majority would be dressed as their legend. Their hero. Xavier absolutely hates it! And he hates the amount of people he spots in Lumiere costumes. But he'll put it on upon your insistence. Just be ready for the consequences later on cause this man is jealous of his own superhero alter-ego 😭

Option 4: Angel

Xavier with large white wings protruding from his back would be another fitting sight with his overall white/silver aesthetic. Imagine him as your guardian angel, always watching over you, protecting you and trying his best to guide you on the right path, despite his own desires for you.

Option 5: Bunny/Alien

If not the above choices, then some cute/sexy bunny costume (though we've already got our bunny butler). Or a really silly alien costume that somewhat resembles his sticker set. We know he'll look squisher than ever in those 🥺

ZAYNE

Option 1: Mad Scientist

Something similar to Dr. Faustus or Dr. Frankenstein (yeah Frankenstein was NOT the monster but the name of the guy who created the monster..in case some people still don't know 😭). Zayne’s personal goal– his obsession and drive– to keep MC alive is somewhat similar to Dr. Frankenstein’s obsession with unraveling the secrets of life and well..ultimately beating death by bringing someone to life. And Zayne's hunger for knowledge is also similar to that of Dr. Faustus’s who readily sells his soul to the devil in exchange for knowledge.

So yeah..Zayne as a mad scientist, obsessed with knowledge and the drive to keep you alive would be intense 💯/💯

Option 2: Tutor

He'll sigh, take off his glasses and pinch the bridge of his nose in annoyance, like he always does. But you'll somehow convince him to do it because he's incapable of saying no to you.

It starts as a silly costume idea but the moment you see his legs clad in those unusually tight-fitting slacks and the pointer stick in his hand, you realize you might have a tutor kink and that you wouldn't mind misbehaving cause you'd actually enjoy getting punished by him 🫣

Option 3: Snowman/Penguin

The cute option! Definitely Dr. Carter, Yvonne and his other co-workers coaxed him to put it on for the little kids visiting Akso hospital throughout the week. When you stop by for a scheduled check-up and stumble upon him, you can't help but take loads of pictures of him with the kids 😊

RAFAYEL

Option 1: Merman/Siren

Just like Xavier as Lumiere, Rafayel as a merman on halloween would be such a spectacular inside joke.

At first he'd be offended because the fake tail you bought for him would feel like an insult to the real thing. He would pout and narrow his brows but after your constant cajoling and sweet-talking he'll agree to indulge you. And it's all fun and games until you realize why all those sailors in fiction are so terrified yet turned on at the mere sight of a merman/siren. He'll entice you so easily with his velvety voice 😵‍💫

Option 2: Assassin

Don't fall for his pretty face. Rafayel can be cunning, deceptive and deadly when he wants to be. (in the main story and also as Abysswalker). As such, putting on the attire of an assassin would come easy to him. His charm is as lethal as the numerous daggers he conceals within his clothes. He’ll strike you right in the heart. Can totally imagine him doing finger guns at you 😉

Option 3: Chick

Pouty babie in an adorable chick costume with a beret and paintbrush, like his sticker pack. Imagine him struggling with the bulky costume, trying to waddle towards you in annoyance, demanding you to immediately help him take off the costume. Despite it all, he'd let you hug him and take selfies. He'll hate every minute of it but still pose properly when you take pics 😆

these are just some silly thoughts..what are your costume ideas for each LI 🤔

» MASTERLIST «

[annecoulmanross]

So it's been a while. But I couldn't let James Fitzjames Finding Day pass without some celebration—thank you Doug Stenton, Stephen Fratpietro, and Robert W. Park for giving us this wonderful and terrible knowledge. I've made an emotional playlist of all of us currently experiencing whatever emotion this is:

Selected lyrics for each song included below the cut!

Strange Ships | PHILDEL

Strange ships won’t let me sail out Passed by the ice and stone now

2. I, Carrion (Icarian) | Hozier

If the wind turns, if I hit a squall Allow the ground to find its brutal way to me

3. Howling | Wild Rivers

Howling out here for the morning light I can’t sing no more

4. The Yawning Grave | Lord Huron

I tried to warn you when you were a child I told you not to get lost in the wild I sent omens and all kinds of signs I taught you melodies, poems, and rhymes

5. Sax Rohmer #1 | The Mountain Goats

Ships loose from their grins, capsize and then they’re gone Sailors with no captains watch a while and then move on

6. Long Wave | Dessa

Starve the guard dog And see what hunger does It’s easy when we’re well fed To talk of love

7. Achilles Come Down | Gang of Youths

Throw yourself into the unknown, With pace and a fury defiant Clothe yourself in beauty untold, And see life as a means to a triumph

8. Eat You Alive | The Oh Hellos

I’ve seen the true face of the things you call life The song of the siren that holds your desire Death, she is cunning and clever as hell And she’ll eat you alive

9. My Ego Dies At The End | Jensen McRae

Leave my body and my ego early Kill it kind with a surgeon’s mercy Claim I put it out of its misery

10. Who We Are | Hozier

Darling, we sacrificed We gave our time to something undefined This phantom life sharpens like an image But it sharpens like a knife

11. Devourer | Aidoneus

Beams of light, show me how to feel Light the gloam, find my Achilles heel I will welcome my mortality—let me go

12. Sound the Bells | Dessa

Go lift your sails up For one last swell Go lift yourselves up To sound the bells

13. Your Bones | Of Monsters and Men

Said goodbye to you my friend As the fire spread All that’s left are your bones That will soon sink like stones

14. Wildflower and Barley | Hozier, Allison Russell

This year, I swear it will be buried in actions This year, I swear it will be buried in words Some close to the surface, some close to the casket I feel as useful as dirt, put my body to work

15. These Bones | Azrai, Momo O’brien

It’s a savage sea we’re made to roam Every tide can turn to haunt us But the ocean reaches past these ghosts And I will always sail for more

16. By Way Of Sorrow | Cry Cry Cry

You have come by way of sorrow You have come by way of tears You’ll reach your destiny Meant to find you all these years

17. Gracestone | PHILDEL

When I open my final door I’m gonna sail much wilder seas than your ships were built for I’m turning into dust across that cove You know, I have known enough to not feel owed

18. Glowing | The Oh Hellos

You’ll rise, like land, pulled up at the sound of some strange commandment A moon alight, reflecting fully And I guess it would feel like rebirth, out of some kind of dying To see yourself so glowing

[cnwolf-brainrot]

Y’all have no idea how important this is to me.

Rogue is a character who constantly has to hold on. She’s had to hold on to her control and hold herself back for pretty much her entire life. She can’t touch another person, which means she constantly has to hold back, to keep herself in check, to grasp tight to anything that makes her even a little bit “human” less she be deemed nothing but a monster. This episode is all about Rogue letting go. Letting go of her control, letting go of her morals, letting go — or failing to let go — of Remy… she finally cuts loose, and we see how powerful she is. We see how cut-throat she can be. We see how much she feels, how much she fears, how much she grieves. But this… this moment? When she finally feels the grief through the rage? We see her drop her final defenses, and when she lets go she falls. She completely falls into this embrace and she presses into it. Rogue has spent her entire life holding back from touch, so to sink so fully into a hug like this shows just how far gone she is. This isn’t a quick hug where she’s making sure to keep a layer of clothing between skin contact. This is a full-body embrace with no care for anything but contact and comfort, two things that have been denied Rogue for so long.

This episode tore Rogue down to the deepest parts of herself and forced her to let go, and when she did Kurt and the other X-Men were there to catch her.

also it just makes me really happy to actually see Kurt and Rogue’s relationship acknowledged on screen, they are one of my favorite pairs of siblings in media and seeing them like this is extremely important to me.

[loaksbitch]

jake sully telling you to stop running away and take him when you’re overly stimulated while he’s not even near his orgasm?? yes pls i’ll def write it!! (⨳)

warnings - jake being jake obviously needs a warning itself, hellooo?? tummy pressing, pinning hands above head, forced orgasm, overstimulation, p in v, mean jake turns soft jake at the end but still we all love him, ehh idk what i missed so tell me ( grammar errors and typos ahead )

“‘s too much.” your words fell on deaf ears as your mate keeps rutting to you hard, knocking up your gut.

you’ve lost count of how many times you’d came through the time you both started to fuck. “j-jak-jake” you’d keep stuttering every time he thrusts up to you, “can’t get enough of this pussy, princess” he states.

“can’t get enough of you” he’d sneak his arms and wrap them around your waist before brining you up from the floor to his strong thighs. “no!” you whine when you feel him fully sink into your heat

jake would look down to where you both are connected and groan at the sight of your arousal all over his cock. “fuck, you’re taking me so well” he cusses holding you by your hips and pulling you up from his length to push you back in

at this point you’re nothing but his cocksleeve, jake ignores your pleas and keeps rutting to you like a monster. you gasp when you feel a bubble is about to burst in your tummy and shake your head knowing you’ll pass out if your mate won’t stop

not thinking of consequences, you slightly lift yourself up from his thighs but not fully for his cock to slip out and place your small hand on his pelvis, trying to push him off and that was a big mistake

“JAKE!?” you scream when he pulls you down forcefully. “where the fuck do you think you’re going?” he would hiss under his unstable breath and place you by your back, pressing your hips down to the floor.

you’ve now pissed jake on top of you, one hand claiming your tiny hands and pinning them above your head. “stop running away,” you feel his other hand push your left leg to the side for more access. “stop fucking running away and take it, take me”

you shake your head side to side as tears keep forming in your eyes. “it hurts,” you hear him scoff. “should’ve thought of that before being brat and pissing me off, lover girl”

you feel his hand that was holding your left leg slowly slide up to your tummy and once he was below your navel he only was needed to press lightly to feel how deep he was fucking your cervix. you did not even need to tell him you’re cumming as he felt you squeeze the day light out of his cock

“that’s it pretty girl, cum for me” he leans down to kiss your lids and wiping your tears with his hand that was pressing on your tummy, “fuck i’m so close” jake says making you gasp a sob out ‘finally’ you manage to think as your fogged mind processes what’s happening

you squeeze your eyes shut when you feel him bottom out to paint your walls nice and pretty. “so fucking gorgeous with my load in you” he would compliment you as you two try to ease your breath

finally being able to think straight, you feel jake pullout of you with a constant “shh, you did so well princess” and sweet nothings being whispered to your ears. after a while, you’re partially awake with hazy eyes as you watch jake press a warm and wet towel at your sex to clean you up

once everything was done, jake spoons you and keeps apologizing for making you cry, you hum knowing somehow it’s your fault for being a brat and trying to make him jealous with flirting with other men he doesn’t like. “i love you, pretty girl”

he’d only smile when you answer him with a soft purring as you’re technically sleeping.

boy OH BOY this is nothing but a cow shit 😭 sorry this ain’t what y’all expected :’)

like + reblog + comments are super appreciated and not pressured. i love each and everyone of you babies <3

[star-suh]

Bloodlust

Park Seonghwa x Male Reader

cw: top vampire seonghwa, hunter yn, dub-con, sex under the effects of a bite, rimjob, 69, throatfucking, blowjob, fingering, belly bulge, bareback, nipple play, spit play, some fluff at the end?

an: this is NOT related to the vampire story.

yn’s family has been vampire hunters for ages and it’s time for him to take charge of the family business, he has grown with a deep hatred towards those ‘monsters’ that somehow managed to live still in the modern days. one night yn was casually drinking a cup of liquor on a bar when someone caught his attention, a tall man, very handsome, was catching everyone’s attention. men and women all over him as if he was a precious being that needs to be worshiped, a drug they can’t afford to quit. they were hypnotized… HYPNOTIZED?? yn’s skin crawled as he was sensing some danger, that man right there was a vampire. “what’s he doing here in such a public space?” yn questioned himself while trying to get closer to him but as he just finished that question it was answered right afterwards with just a quick glance towards him, “lust.. got it”. vampires are known to be very lustful creatures, when they drink blood directly from the neck they can’t help it but get horny, a feeling transmitted somehow through the bite to their victims, they engage in a questionable sex act that could end only in two ways: a dead human or someone with a severe headache and some blood lost.

then something clicked on yn’s head, this could be the opportunity to kill his first vampire and free the world from one of those filthy creatures. “okay yn you can do this”, he walks towards the vampire, sit beside him and nuzzles his head on the creature’s neck. “my my what do we have here” he said surprised “a bold one huh?”. kisses here and there and some teasing drawed the vampire more interested in yn, he stopped hypnotizing people, grabbed yn by his hand and then guided him upstairs “follow me”.

‘fool.. he doesn’t know this is gonna be his last night’ yn thought and laughed inside his mind.

‘fool.. he must’ve forgotten vampires can read minds’ the vampire thought with a serious face, “the name’s seonghwa by the way” he turns his head towards yn and smiles, but there’s a subtle sensation of danger behind that smile.. something ain’t right.

seonghwa went near a table to grab more liquor for him and his guest. yn was getting ready to jump and stab seonghwa but something made him stop in his tracks, an invisible force make him stay still, “you shouldn’t be walking into a bar thinking of killing the owner of it”. “what?” yn said surprised, his skin crawling when seonghwa walked near him, “so stupid of you to forget about the mind reading capabilities of a vampire. you were so eager to kill me that you forgot the basics” seonghwa mocked him tracing his index finger on his chin. “but you’re quite the snack” with a flip of his fingers he unbuttoned yn’s shirt and discarded his pants leaving him just in underwear, seonghwa bit his lip “wonder how tasty your blood would be”.

he walked behind yn’s back and caressed his skin, his touch leaving a burning like sensation on him, “ufff what a sexy blood bag i have here” his body heating up, the horniness taking over him and soon over yn. seonghwa whimpered, eager to taste yn’s blood “hngh… i can’t wait for it” the bulge in his pants getting bigger and bigger. his tongue swirling on yn’s neck smearing it with saliva that would numb the area, “you know, vampire bites hurt like hell, i might be a monster for you but i won’t let you feel pain”. his fangs scraping the neck’s skin, teasing yn whose blood boiled of anger, how could he fall to a vampire’s trap he is such an idiot. finally the fangs sink on his skin making the hunter roll his eyes back, an euphoric feeling taking over his body, his body heating up, his brain chemistry being altered thanks to seonghwa’s bite. a tent forming on his underwear, he squirmed and moaned. “how are you feeling?” seonghwa’s red orbs staring deep into yn’s soul, he struggled to form a word, drool falling down the corners of his mouth, “more.. need more” he managed to say, already drunk in seonghwa’s bite.

seonghwa ate yn out, his tongue penetrating yn’s insides, his ass being smeared in that numbing saliva that could help for later. yn whined and moaned, he wanted mored, nothing was on his mind just the thought of seonghwa helping him with the hornyness, “help me with this, take responsibility” he demanded making seonghwa smiled in between slurpings,”yes sir” he said burying his tongue even deeper.

yn leaned down on his back and seonghwa positioned himself in a 69 position, he started throatfucking yn, his long dick bulging the other’s throat while the vampire fuck him with his tongue and fingers and also sucking his dick. seonghwa’s dick is all slobbery and sloppy covered in yn’s thick spit, “who’s being a good blood bag?” seonghwa slapped his wet tip on yn’s puckered lips “do you want it?” seonghwa asks, pouting, and yn nodded, emitting a quite cute whimper, still licking the vampire’s shaft.

yn sat on seonghwa’s long shaft, sinking on it inch by inch, his insides tightening around it.

“so tight and warm” seonghwa blurted out, he never had his dick hugged so tight by someone’s hole, “it feels like my dick is gonna melt” he adds. the bite of seonghwa somehow has a different reaction on yn’s body, elevating his body temperature a bit higher than the rest contrasting with seonghwa’s cold skin, an amazing sensation if you ask. yn finally bottomed out and starts riding, his hole always gripping on seonghwa’s meat when going up and swallowing it whole when going down, a bulge forming on his tummy, “you’re gripping so hard, fuck” the top cries.

yn’s hips moved on their own, it’s like his body is chasing for that pleasure, to satisfy itself using the other’s dick. “i will kill you when this ends” yn moans, tears falling down his flushed face, he then turns around, his back facing seonghwa now, and keep on riding him, ‘i can’t let him see me this fucked up’ yn thought, hiding his face with his arms.

yn grabbed one of his legs and pushed it towards his chest while still covering his face with the other one, seonghwa kneels in front of his puckered hole giving some little kisses on it, while it open and closes, “it’s asking for more, let’s give him more”. he rams himself all at once, drawing a loud whimper out of yn. the thrusts were so powerful that the bed started creaking and moving, in any moment it could break by how faster and hard seonghwa was fucking him. luckily for yn the numbing capabilities of seonghwa’s saliva helped him to not feel pain at all. sweat from yn started to pool in the bed, beads of it decorating his body, the other amazed by how hot he looked like this, he licks his chest and started to suck on his nipples, leaving bite marks on it too, “look at this puffy red nipples” seonghwa caresses them with his fingers to see how sensitive they are, “can’t resist the urge to bite them and then put a piercing on the both of them, you know. but let’s leave them for the next time”, “there’s not gonna be a next time awful monster, and if there will be one, would be your last” yn threatens. the vampire just laughs “you said the same tonight, on that little head of yours”.

the top’s dick goes in and out, squelching sounds coming from the wet hole of the bottom. “how long do you keep on hiding your face, don’t be childish” seonghwa tries to remove his arm but is impressed by yn’s strength, “i’m not gonna hypnotize you or something.. i just want a kiss” he says embarrassed, looking everywhere but yn. “come onnnn” he starts to get annoyed, “you won’t deny me a kiss, would you?” but unfortunately for him yn keeps moving his head in a no motion. one would thought the vampire would take this opportunity to fuck him even harder but no, he just plops himself on top of yn and hugs him, licking his nipples while maintaining the pace of the thrusts “fine” annoyance laced on his tone.

seonghwa stands up and jerks yn’s dick catching him off guard, “what the” he says finally removing the arm of his face, just to see a gorgeous vampire in front of him probably the handsomest person he has saw in his life, damn the hair sticked to his forehead made him look so hot, yn swear he could cum right on the spot by just seeing him, and he did, painting seonghwa’s hand in white. all this time seonghwa didn’t realize yn was finally showing his face, due to being annoyed he was just looking down at yn’s hole swallowing his dick. “what” he says surprised seeing the cum ropes spurting out of yn’s dick, that’s when he looks up to see a fucked up yn, all sweaty and red… “god your majestic” seonghwa mutters. his hand reaching yn’s cheek to stroke it gently. yn cups seonghwa’s face and brings him closer to his, “let’s get this over” his lips inches away from seonghwa’s. “just a kiss” he whimpers and pouts. “for a vampire you’re anything but scary, dare to say a childish one” his lips ghosting over the other’s, “look who’s talking” he pauses, “that’s what your family made you believe, that we are monsters but we’re not. we evolved like humans did, we’re not the desperate bloodthirsty monsters anymore” the top tries to steal a kiss from the bottom but fails. yn teases the other denying him the pleasure of touching his lips. “open” yn forced seonghwa’s mouth open with his hand and he complied, carefully to not touch his lips, yn uses his tongue to lick on the creature’s fangs “pointy” he whispers. his tongue explored the other’s, licking on his fangs and tongue “stick it out” once again yn demands, seonghwa complies and yn sucks his tongue. it was messy, lots and lots of saliva coming out of their mouths, dripping down their chins and landing in their bodies, thick threads of it everywhere around their mouths and finally their lips touched. seonghwa was hungry for it so he grab the other by his neck to deepen the kiss, each other’s cheeks hollowing showing how they were sucking each other’s tongue. in between their messy kisses, the vampire emptied his balls inside yn’s gushy hole. both moaned, their needs satisfied now and the effect of the bite passing, “shit you wrecked me” yn says tired, falling down on the bed. seonghwa doesn’t look tired at all “that bite really made you turn into a needy whore. should i bite you again?” a smug grin on his face, “do it and i rip your dick”...

yn went on with his life as if nothing happened, hiding from his family the fact that he slept with a vampire, keeping the facade of still hating vampires and wanting to kill them. unbeknownst to them, all nights he goes out to a local bar with the pretext to just drink a couple of cups, but actually is because his ass itches inside, it wants something that only one person in this world could give him, “hey” he greets to the vampire who was laying down in the bed with an unbuttoned shirt showing up his chest and abs “hey” he smirks showing his fang and grabbing his already hard bulge.

[absurdthirst]

Puppy Love {Joel Miller x F!Reader}

Rating: Explicit

Word count: 12.1k

Warnings: Mentions of pimping someone out, post apocalyptic morality, mentions of violence, guns, biting, infected, death, slapping, angst, anger, Joel being emotionally constipated, declarations of love, unprotected sex, vaginal sex, outdoors sex, pulling out, mentions of pregnancy/infertility

Comments: You always follow Joel Miller around, you've got his back. You're in love with him. Putting up with Tess's nickname of puppy dog, you don't realize that Joel feels for you until the end.

A/N: ~Contains spoilers for Episode 2~ Follows the episode along with some canon divergence.

Co-written with @storiesofthefandomlovers

**Follow @absurdthirst-writes and turn on notifications to stay up to date on all new fics.

|| MasterList || Joel Miller MasterList ||

Click Keep Reading only if you have read the Rating and Warnings and understand the warnings may not be complete to avoid listing spoilers. As AO3 says 'creator chooses not to use warnings'. You also agree that you're the right age to be consuming anything here.

Your eyes slide up and down the streets, daring anyone to come closer or ask questions as you clean against the crumbling brick facade and twist your head to look back at the two men huddled together about a hundred feet from where you are. You can’t hear what they’re saying but Joel looks even more pissed off than normal, even for Joel. 

“What?” Joel shakes his head in annoyance, knowing he’s being squeezed for cards. He doesn’t get charged that much for the entire hydro stash he gets from his seller. “No, no fucking battery is worth that much and you know it.” He growls, narrowing his eyes at the untrustworthy weasel in front of him. 

Robert’s eyes slide nervously around and he gives a small shrug, uncomfortable being around Joel and preferring to deal with Tess. “What can I say? Times are hard. It’s getting harder to come by these things.” His greedy eyes shift over to where you are looking out at the street. “Although….I’m sure we could work something out. I could cut the price in half if you, say, let me have your little pet there for the night.” He chuckles, referring to Tess’s mocking nickname for you. ‘Joel’s little puppy dog.’

Joel stares at the other man for a few seconds, just processing what he said, until it finally sinks in. “What the fuck did you just ask for?” He growls, low and quiet so you don’t hear. 

“You heard me, Miller. A night with your little lapdog over there. She’s gotta be good at sucking cock because you keep her around. Got a fucking harem started with her and Tess. Do you have one sit on your face and the other ride your cock?” Robert guesses, crossing his arms with a cocky smirk, “or do they take turns sucking your dick? Mmm if you guarantee me a blowjob, I’ll even throw in some extras.”

You tense slightly, shifting forward from your place leaning against the way. Eyes watching the way that Joel’s fist curls tight for a moment. Wishing that you could hear what the fuck they are saying,  but Joel told you to stay here, so that’s what you’re doing. “Joel?” You call out, getting his attention as he turns his head towards you. You’re wondering if you need to come over, knowing you will throw yourself into a fight for him if needed.

He shakes his head, holding his hand up towards you to stop you. He considers the guys offer, he can’t deny it. It would get him a hell of a lot closer to where he needs to be without having to do several burns for the cards. “No. She’s not available.” He finally says, not wanting to force you into something like that. He might be an evil bastard but he’s not a monster. “She’s not an option.” He decides, “you get more ration cards when we meet for me to collect it.”

“Come on man.” Robert shakes his head and his eyes slide past Joel to leer at you. “It’s just a fucking blowjob. I’ll tell you what?” He huffs, smirking and looking back at Joel. “Let me fuck her, both holes, have her suck my cock and I’ll give you the battery for free. Hell of a deal, right? I’ll even let you watch if you want to.”

Joel can’t help but reach up to squeeze the asshole’s throat. His anger makes him growl as he chokes the prick who dared to violate you like that. “You get the ration cards when I collect it or I can kill you now and get the battery for free? Hell of a deal, right? I’ll even let her watch me kill you.” Joel sasses, tilting his head as he watches his eyes practically bulge.

“Shit!” You leap forward but Joel just turns his head. 

“Stay there!” He orders harshly, making you stop in your tracks. Watching as Joel leans in and whispers something else to the disgusting little rat he was having to buy from to get the battery he needed. 

“No, no, it-it’s good!” You hear Robert choke out, gasping and sputtering when Joel lets him go. Clutching at his throat and coughing as Joel turns around and starts striding back toward you. 

“Let’s go.” He demands, his scowl even deeper than normal as you scramble to catch up with his long legged strides. You weren’t short but he’s speed walking. 

“What the fuck just happened?” You demand, wanting to know what the fuck is going on.

“Don’t worry about it.” Joel growls, body still vibrating with anger. He hates that you were a bargaining chip in this new world. Twenty years ago, it would’ve been illegal but anything goes in this new era, even the things the QZ deems illegal are turned a blind eye to. 

“Did you get the car battery?” You ask and Joel doesn’t look at you, knowing he’s barely holding on to the thread of decency he has when it comes to you. 

“No.” He says without further explanation, “he’s got to locate it.”

“Okay.” You think there is more to it, but he obviously doesn’t want to talk about it. You just walk along beside him, watching some of the people on the street part, giving Joel a wide berth. “So what do we do now?” You ask, unsure if he had other things to take care of.

“We keep low. You seen Tess? I ain’t seen her for a couple of days. Startin’ to get worried.” He frowns, guiding you down the alleyway that takes you back to his building. “I haven’t seen her.” 

You mimic his frown, both wondering where Tess is and hating that he’s so worried about her. It’s always been the two of them. You know they fuck, you know sometimes Tess will sneak into his bed, and you hate it, but you don’t hate Tess. She is capable of a lot in this world and you know she keeps Joel grounded, something you seem unable to do. 

“Let’s head to mine and then we will try to track her down.” Joel says, unaware that Tess is already waiting in his room, her face beaten up and sore.

You sigh softly, knowing that you will do whatever he wants. It’s dumb, but Joel had saved you when you arrived in the QZ, scared off some less than honorable people and you have been drawn to him ever since. It’s hard being in love with a man who doesn’t love you, doesn’t even look at you like a woman, but you are loyal to him. He claims he’s not a good man, and that’s true at times, but he’s good to you. “We’ll find her. I’m sure she’ll be in your arms tonight.” You mutter, hating how your stomach twists in jealousy.

Joel pretends to not hear you, knowing you and Tess have some tension going on between you but he ignores it. This life is rough enough without needing to fucking deal with women drama. He gets what he needs when he wants and that’s all that matters to him. He rolls his eyes and strides a little faster to get to his room. 

When he opens the door, Tess is sitting there with her face bruised and swollen and he’s ready to fucking kill whoever did that to her.

“Jesus.” You huff, eyes wide at her injuries. It’s on the tip of your tongue to make a snarky comment, but instead you watch Joel fuss over her and clean up the wounds with the bottle of alcohol sitting next to the sink. It would be touching if it didn’t break your heart. “What the fuck happened to you?” You ask finally as he’s dabbing at the corner of her mouth. You flop down on his sofa and glare at your feet.

Joel gently grips her chin as he cleans her up, his eyes burning into hers and he doesn’t hear your question, too busy making sure Tess is okay. Neither of them see the crestfallen look on your face until your scowl covers it. Tess sighs, gently pushing Joel’s hand away as she explains that she was held hostage by a couple of Robert’s goons. Joel hisses in annoyance, knowing he should’ve killed that asshole when he had the chance.

You hate how neither one of them includes you, feeling like an extra wheel. Dragging your feet off the coffee table you slap your hands on your thighs and stand. “Since she’s home, I guess I better do the same.” You want Joel to tell you to stay, but you know he won’t. Wondering why you put yourself through this torture when he only had eyes for Tess.

Joel wants to ask you to stay but he needs to talk to Tess about what happened. He needs to form a plan and you distract him. “See you later.” He tells you, not even looking your way and Tess offers you a slight smirk as she bids you goodbye. Joel tuts when you stomp out, slamming the door behind you. “Tess…” He murmurs, shaking his head. 

“What? She’s like a damn puppy dog hanging around you all the time.” 

Joel snorts, “what does that make you?”

Tess frowns for a moment before she leans forward. “You know what I am to you.” She challenges him, holding his gaze until he turns away. You have fucked everything up, everything was fine until you showed up and things changed. “Joel-“ She pauses, deciding against asking a question she doesn’t want to know the answer to, or at least have it confirmed. Instead she decides to change tactics. “We need to go find Robert and our battery.”

Joel nods, “we do. I’ll go find her and then we can get ahead. Get your shit together.” He orders, standing up and making his way out of the door to track you down. He needs you for backup and also, he is secretly amused at the way Tess frowns whenever you are mentioned. Tess is…Tess is a comfort to him, the woman who has seen him at his worst and still wants him. 

You are innocent really, still able to fight but you haven’t seen that side of him. He doesn’t want you to. He wants you to think of him as the closest version to the person he used to be. He misses that person sometimes, grieves him almost as much as he grieves Sarah. The small things he’d bitch about, like money or working late, are trivial compared to the issues he faces today. 

When he finds you, you are sulking in your room, “come on. I need you to help me and Tess track down Robert and his goons.”

Staring at him incredulously, you huff after a moment, bending down to pick up your boots. “You’ve got some fucking nerve, Miller.” You grumble, feeling like you are being taken advantage of right now. Joel doesn’t comment, just sends you a satisfied look as you put your boots on and turns towards the door. 

“Get your pack, we might need it.” He tells you before he walks out of your rooms like he owns the damn things. Your fault for letting him in, your fault for being so fucking in love with him that you let him walk all over you. 

“This is the last goddamn time.” You promise yourself, muttering angrily as you get ready. 

Joel doesn’t say anything, just raises his eyebrows as he listens outside. Both you and he know that’s not true. When you’re ready, he guides you down the alleyways to meet up with Tess. “Right. Let’s go get this fucker. I’m sick of his bullshit.” Joel huffs, making his way through the alleys to find the place Tess detailed when she told him where she was held.

“Awwww, you decided to come along, I’m so touched.” Tess coos mockingly when you reach her, making you grit your teeth and want to punch her in her good eye. 

“Well, someone has to clean up your mess.” You huff back. 

“Enough.” Joel growls, shaking his head at you before he turns to Tess with a pointed look. They did that a fucking lot, silently communicate like you weren’t fucking there.

Tess nods and Joel leads the way, entering the building with gun in hand and he creeps down the hall, using hand signals to gesture for you to walk or stop. He knows you and Tess have some fucking women issues between you but he doesn’t care. He doesn’t have time for that trivial shit.

It’s not the time to be snarky. Instead of dwelling on the issues, you focus on the task at hand. All you care about is keeping Joel safe. Tess by extension just because you know that he would be upset if something happened to her. She was his woman, not you. Your own gun in your hand, you flank his left side as you follow, eyes peeled for any danger. 

Joel is naturally anxious, keeping his eyes open and ears clear for any noises. When he spots the dead bodies of Robert and his goons, he doesn’t give a fuck. He wants to know who did that to them. When the door to his right suddenly opens, he doesn’t think. He just acts. Shoving the girl against the wall so she drops the knife and placing his foot on it, gun aimed at her. When Marlene appears, Joel narrows his eyes, listening as she begs him not to shoot.

Your fingers tense around your own weapon, aimed at the two fireflies in front of you. “What’s who he sold our battery to? The Che Guevara of Boston?” You roll your eyes at her humor but it’s true. Listening to her tell Joel that they need to take this girl to the state house to meet her group. “Bring your puppy with you too.” You hiss at that, pissed off that Tess’s fucking nickname for you has caught on. “I tried to recruit her, but she’s too loyal to you Joel.” 

Joel conceals the way his heart flutters at the news that you wanted to stay loyal to him. His face remains impassive and the girl tries to get her knife back while Marlene points out that she is bleeding and he needs to hurry up and decide. “Fine.” He grunts after Tess states her case.

Huffing, you shake your head. “You two have fun with that.” You know it’s a bad idea. This is bullshit and there are other places to get a battery. 

“You’re going with us.” Joel tells you sternly and you know that you will, if for anything but to watch his back. 

“We don’t need her. Joel. She’ll just be a liability.” Tess barely spares you a glance and that pisses you off more. 

“I’m going.” You hiss, glaring at her.

Joel doesn't need this catty bullshit, the girl is glaring at him and it's putting him on edge. "Fine. Get your shit kid, we are leaving." He orders the girl, Ellie, who goes to get her knife back with a scowl. When night falls, Joel guides the group through the old tunnel that he uses to smuggle things in and once you're outside the QZ, Ellie's eyes widen. 

"Holy shit." She gasps and a truck drives by. 

"Get down!" Joel hisses, forcing you to duck alongside Ellie.

“Jesus.” You hate being outside the QZ. Hate the risk and you know that it’s getting harder and harder every time. “We need to move. The fucking soldiers have been crawling around.” You murmur quietly, looking around and shivering slightly in the rain. 

Just as you get ready to move, the QZ guard who buys from Joel approaches you, gun raised. Joel doesn’t even think, surging forward to start pummeling the guy to death. He’s feral and there’s nothing any of you can do except watch him. Ellie watches with a fascination while Tess stares impassively.

“Joel.” You know the man is capable of violence, you’ve seen it, but this was unhinged. He turns back to look at the girl and you, the expression on his face is fierce and you shake your head after Tess shows him the red scanner. She’s infected. You listen to the hurried explanations and you know you need to have this conversation somewhere else. “We need to go.” You tell him, picking up the knife that the kid had stuck in the bastard’s leg and handing it back to her. You don’t know about her claim that she’s immune, but she deserves to be able to protect herself out here. “Take the rifle.”

  Ellie takes it and Joel is almost dazed as you walk through the debris and overgrowth to find shelter in the city. Once you’ve found where you usually stop, Joel slumps down in the chair, flexing his knuckles and hissing. Ellie looks exhausted and you tell her to get some sleep, you’re stopping here for the night. “She’s infected.” Joel grunts when she’s fast asleep, bringing yours and Tess’s eyes over to him.

“Her wound looked healed.” Of course it had been dark as shit, but bites from the infected never looked better. It’s always inflamed as the fungal infection spreads through the body, taking over. You glance at his knuckles, wishing that you had ice to put on it. “You should wrap it up.” You tell him.

Joel ignores you, just imagining what could’ve happened out there if that asshole had blabbed. You’d all be dead. Hung for treason or some bullshit like that. “I’m fine.” He finally answers and Tess looks over at him, “she’s right.” That Joel definitely ignores. He grunts, standing up, “I’ll take first watch. You two get some sleep. I’ll watch the girl.” He says, grabbing his rifle and ignoring the pain in his knuckles when he grips the handle.

You sigh, knowing it won’t make a damn bit of difference, but you find yourself a corner away from the door so you have time to react and lay your pack down. Using it as a pillow as you turn your back to Joel and Tess. You don’t want to see whatever else they do or talk about tonight, tired of being the third wheel and tired of feeling like you should just leave.

Joel keeps watch most of the night until Tess tells him to get half an hour. “Lazy bitch couldn’t even get up for a watch.” She scoffs at your sleeping form. 

Joel shakes his head at her, “she didn’t sleep the night before. Trying to help me out by keeping an ear out for the radio. Just - let it, okay?” Joel asks and Tess snorts, nodding her head. He sits down, closing his eyes but he never truly relaxes, just rests until the sun starts to rise. 

“What do we do with the girl?” Tess asks when he stands up, walking over to her. 

“Kill her.” Joel says, knowing that Marlene wouldn’t find out. He could lie and say she got infected for real this time. It’s not far from the truth. “We don’t know if she’s gonna turn.” He murmurs, keeping his eyes on the curled up ball in the middle of the room.

Grunting, you wake up with a jolt, used to the nightmares that plague your sleep. Everyone in the fucking horror reality has them, or they’ve never lived outside the QZ they were born in. Flipping over, you notice that Joel and Tess are already awake, both of them watching the girl. “Shoulda woke me.” You grumble, sitting up and rubbing the sleep from your eyes before you shuffle over towards Joel.

“You needed the sleep.” Joel murmurs, ignoring the scoff from Tess. “We should kill her.” Joel says with finality just as the girl wakes up, glancing around to see you sitting up and Joel sitting there with his rifle aimed towards her, anxious and tense as hell. “You make one wrong move and I’ll kill ya.” He promises, making Ellie scoff and pull her sleeve up. 

“I’m fine. No different than last night.”

You shift slightly, looking from Joel to Ellie. “Why didn’t she kill you?” You demand, asking about Marlene. Ellie explains about the daily testing and holds out her arm to show that it is perfectly steady. No tremor, which is normally the first sign of infection besides a bite. “Jesus.” You shake your head, unsure of what all of these means and look back towards Joel. It’s him she needs to convince. Or Tess rather because she can sway Joel’s opinion.

Joel considers not killing Ellie when Tess points out that it hasn’t spread. “Fine. Better get something to eat before we head out.” Joel says, sitting down, and he flexed his knuckles. 

“Broken?” Tess asks and he shrugs, “hairline. It will heal fast.” 

You frown at that but still get your jerky out of your pack. 

Ellie, meanwhile, pulls out a delicious looking sandwich and your eyes widen. “Is that chicken?” Tess asks and Ellie explains how Marlene got it from smugglers. Joel snorts, chewing on his jerky and trying to ignore the pain in his hand.

You hate that he is hurting, knowing that he can’t take anything that would help because it would make him slower to react. Instead of offering to take the gun, you open your pack and offer him the precious bottle of aspirin you have. It took a month of ration cards to get it, and you normally used it when your cramps would get too bad. “Here.” You offer quietly, “to help with the swelling.”

Joel takes the pill, knowing it’s aspirin and trusting you. He swallows it dry and makes the decision to head out. “Let’s go. We need to take advantage of the daylight.” He says, standing up to grab his pack and the rifle. Ellie scrambles to pack up her pack again and soon enough, you are heading outside with Tess keeping close to Joel.

“Do we want to take the long way or the short way?” Joel asks and it’s not your opinion he’s actually asking for. Tess snorts. 

“You mean the long way or sure to die way.” She corrects sarcastically, making Ellie’s eyes widen dramatically and you roll your own. You’ve been the short way and it’s fine as long as you pay attention. 

“I vote for the long way given the small amount of information available.” Ellie huffs, making you smirk. 

“The long way, fast.” You decide. “Sooner we get her to the state house, the sooner you have the truck you need to get to Tommy.” That’s what all this is about after all, getting to his brother.

Joel nods, agreeing with you. You, Tess, and the girl trail behind him. Joel hears Tess telling the kid about Boston and the wreck it is now, but he isn't really listening, too busy scanning the area for any threats: human or infected. 

He walks into the hotel and Ellie is amazed. "Wow. Did you guys ever stay somewhere like this?" She asks and Joel snorts while Tess says, "it was a bit out of our price range." You can't help but snort when Joel sasses the kid by hopping down onto the last step. 

"Come on." You urge her forward and she rambles on about the hotel. When she rings the bell, Joel rolls his eyes and you shrug, offering him a look of amusement.

Halfway through the lobby when Ellie screams, you turn around and rush back through the water, unsure if it’s a clicker. Relieved when Joel isn’t shouting and shooting, you find the decayed bones of an unfortunate bastard floating. He must have moved and scared the girl. You hum, watching as Joel offers her his hand, something that he wouldn’t have done if he didn’t somewhat believe her story about not being infected, so it bodes well for her. “Come on kid,” you offer, giving her a small smile. “Let’s go up to the rooms. We’ve got a hell of a climb.” 

Once you climb the ridiculous amount of stairs, Joel curses when he finds the exit has caved in. “Fuck.” He grunts. 

“I can fit through. Let me try and get through.” Tess says and Joel shakes his head, “we can go the short way.” 

Tess huffs, “we don’t have time. I’ll be fine.” She promises and starts to climb through the debris. You hover near Ellie, trying to ignore the way your heart pangs at their secret look, only between them. It makes you feel like you’re a thousand miles away from them. Ellie slumps down on the floor and Joel follows suit, looking over at you while Ellie starts to ask him questions.

You fiddle with your gun, trying not to feel like you are stuck in the middle of a Q&A that you don’t want to be at. Snickering to yourself when Ellie sasses back at Joel that she knows where Detroit is. Only to be surprised moments later when Joel actually knows where you are from. You had only told him once and assumed that he had forgotten or didn’t care enough. “So you and her are….” Joel’s entire body tenses. 

“Pass.” Of course he wouldn’t define their relationship, he doesn’t ever acknowledge things Tess says in front of you, but he doesn’t deny them either. 

Ellie huffs and turns her inquisitive eyes towards you. “So that means you and her are……” She trails off, trying to get either one of you to fill in the gaps. 

Joel grunts, “pass.” He doesn’t want to talk about you or Tess with Ellie. 

“Are you- is it like a throuple situation?” She guesses and Joel snorts, “nope.” 

You and Tess would kill each other before you fuck each other. “Absolutely not.” You wrinkle your nose at being with Tess. God, she gets under your skin but she is important to Joel. 

“Rightttt.” Ellie drawls just as there’s a thumping on the door. Joel stands up, gun in hand, anxious until Tess shouts her announcement that she’s back. Joel sighs slightly, relieved to see Tess, and he gestures for you and Ellie to get your shit.

Your stomach knots, knowing that the hardest part is coming up but there is something calming about the view from the terrace. Looking out over the ruins of the city that you had wished to have visited before all of the world went to shit. Tess pulls back the heavy plastic curtain so Ellie can get her first look and you walk up to the ledge. 

Ellie has to step up on the little ledge and she looks down at the courtyard below. “There’s so many of them.” Ellie exhales, looking at that view. You shift to stand next to her, Joel on the other side. Tess starts to talk, explaining the way the fungus spreads. “They’re connected.” Tess hums. “More than you know.” Joel looks over at you and meets your eyes for a second. 

You wish that he cared about you, but he doesn’t. You tear your eyes away from his and listen to Tess tell Ellis about how the tendrils spread underground, alerting other infected to your location. “You’re not immune from being ripped apart.” Tess cautions her. “You understand?” For a moment, the woman you hold such a grudge against seems almost motherly and you wish that she could talk to you with half the kindness, although you know you’ve not been exactly nice to her. Your feelings for Joel getting in the way of that.

“So we’re not going that way.” Ellie huffs and you shake your head, knowing what’s coming. “Short way?” She asks, looking between the three of you and you look to Joel for his opinion. 

“Museum.” He decides, making you roll your shoulders in anticipation of the problems ahead. 

You are anxious, preparing yourself to enter the museum and Joel glances at you, "be careful." He tells you softly, ignoring the glance from Tess. He opens the door, pleased after discovering the fungal roots are dry. He enters the Bostonian Museum, keeping his gun raised and ready.

Blowing out a soft breath, you grip your gun in your hand tightly and keep your head on a swivel as you watch your steps. The museum is dark and all you have for light is the flashlights, the kid breathing heavily at your back and you swear you hear her huff under her breath because Joel wouldn’t let her have a gun. She looks around, taking in the scene as the old building creaks and groans around you. “Yeah, cooked.” Joel says and Tess grunts. 

“Finally some fucking luck.” Ellie steps forward, almost carelessly at their conversation. “I guess we should have gone this way in the first place.” Joel hums, not watching as Ellie turns a corner. 

“Oh shit!” You rush over and shine another light on the body she discovered, groaning to yourself when you see that the person has been ripped up. Knowing what causes that. “What the fuck did that?” She demands, making you shush her quickly. You look over at Tess and Joel, the other woman looking nervous. 

“Maybe.” Tess whispers. “Maybe he was attacked outside. Crawled through the door, the door was open. It could have been him.” She insists, making you roll your eyes and scoff quietly. She knows that’s not what happened. 

“I don’t hear anything.” She insists. “What would you hear?” Ellie demands, her voice at a normal volume and all three of you turn towards her to quiet her down.

Joel holds his hand up, telling Ellie to quieten down. “What would you hear?” She repeats in a whisper, “you saying an infected did that?” Tess shushes her and you bite your lip. “-because I’ve been attacked by one and it wasn’t like that.” Ellie looks back at the body. 

“Okay from this point forward we are silent. Not quiet, silent.” 

Ellie shakes her head “what-” 

Joel cuts her off, “no questions. Just do it.” Joel is anxious, always tense when he’s in closed spaces, and he slowly makes his way up the stairs. It’s difficult to move so slow but he is careful when he steps on the dried fungus. He manages to make it up the stairs and onto the second floor. He opens the door, walking in with his gun ready. The ceiling collapses and Tess shoves Ellie forward, pushing her into you and the three of you fall onto the floor. Joel helps Ellie up and that’s when you hear it. A clicker.

Shit. Your gun comes up and you immediately move in front of Ellie, flanking Joel to his left and Tess to his right. You’re trapped in a room with a fucking clicker. You don’t dare to breathe, barely creeping forward since they rely on hearing, totally blind with the large, hard fungal growth covering their heads. You hear her breathing start to pick up and you turn to find her wide as you realize there is more than one. All of you crouch down behind a display and Joel motions to Ellie that they rely on hearing. You can see the terror on her face, making the way your heart is pounding in your chest. Joel puts his finger to his lips again as they continue to make horrible screeches and clicks as they search for the source of the sounds. The clicker comes around the display and the little girl sees it for the first time, inhaling sharply. 

Shit. The clicker turns and screeches before Joel brings his gun up to shoot it. 

It’s terrifying, fighting for your life, and you are scared that Joel is gonna get bitten. You scramble to shoot the clicker but eventually you run out of bullets. Joel curses, “fucking go.” He hisses, “I’ll distract it.” You rush to hide around a corner to reload your gun. The girl and Tess are across the room and your hands shake as you struggle to reload your weapon. “

Fuck.” You hiss and Joel comes to stand beside you, doing the same thing. His eyes are full of fear and you stare back at him until you hear the clicks.

Your eyes close for a brief second, well aware that this could be it for you. You hate it. The fact that you could die in this fucking museum and never find Tommy. Never tell Joel how you feel. The floorboards creak and you hear the clicks right next to you. Another sound draws its attention and you turn to watch it, finding Ellie cowering behind a display and both you and Joel creep over to her. Making your way silently until Joel steps on a piece of broken glass. You cry out and start shooting as the clicker flies over the display and knocks all three of you to the ground, trying to infect you as you fight it off. 

Joel curses, scrambling to keep the clicker away from you and Ellie and himself. It’s a struggle but eventually he manages to push it aside and put a bullet in its neck and eventually it’s face. Just as that one falls, the other rushes forward and Tess swings an axe into its head. Joel scrambles to grab his rifle, shooting the bastard in the head to kill it. “You alright?” Joel asks Tess as she stands. 

“Twisted ankle.” 

He turns to you, eyes wide and asks you the same question. “I’m fine.” You answer and Tess asks Ellie who exhales shakily, “well I didn’t shit my pants.”

You can’t help but laugh at her response, knowing you felt the same way the first time you dealt with clickers. “Are you fucking kidding me?” Turning back towards the kid, your eyes widen when you see that she’s injured again. “Ah…I mean if it was going to happen to one of us.” 

You catch the way that Tess tenses up, making you frown slightly but she’s quickly redirecting the conversation. “Hey, let’s get out of here.”

Making your way onto the roof, it’s obvious that Tess needs medical attention. Joel hands Ellie a rag for her arm and turns his attention to Tess. Leaving you to walk over to the other girl and help her while he concentrates on wrapping her ankle. “Come here. I’ll help you.” It will be a good distraction, tending to her wound rather than watching Joel fret over a twisted ankle. Soon her arm is wrapped and she’s walking towards the edge and the scaffolding that connects the two buildings. “Over there?” She asks and Joel barely glances at her. “Yeah, I know it looks scary.” Joel starts but Ellie interrupts him. “That was scary, this is wood.” She huffs as she brazenly walks across the beam and makes you smirk at the other two adults. 

"Just wait there. Give us a minute." Joel says and you step to follow Ellie across the wood, not wanting to see the tenderness Joel gifts Tess with. "Be careful." Joel warns you while opening his backpack. You scoff, walking across the wood as brazenly as Ellie. Joel shakes his head, while he tapes Tess's ankle. 

"Told you, she's trouble." Her eyes focus on Joel but he doesn't notice, set on the job at hand. "There's probably more ahead." 

Tess nods, "so we'll deal with it then...I got it. I got it." She tells Joel when he wraps around her ankle again. 

Joel leans back to look at Tess until his gaze turns to the building across from them. "What about the kid?" He asks, "maybe the first bite didn't take but what about the second?" 

Tess huffs, turning towards him, "why don't you just take the good news? Can you do that?" She asks Joel, "can you just for once think that we might actually win?" Tess asks and shakes her head, "just go and watch her and your fucking puppy." 

Joel sighs, grabbing his backpack and rifle before making his way across the wood. “Wow.” Ellie exhales, looking at that view. You shift to stand next to her, Joel on the other side. 

“Is that everything you hoped for?” Joel asks Ellie as you stare across what used to be a major city now turned to a deserted urban jungle. 

“Jury’s still out.” Ellie replies back, “but man…you can’t deny that view.” You hum in agreement and Joel looks at Ellie before his eyes meet yours for a second.

“Tess gonna live?” You ask, breaking the moment up but you hate how his eyes seem to suck you in. It’s not going to happen for you and you need to accept that. You’ve already decided that when Joel and Tess get their vehicle from the Fireflies, you are going to stay. You’ll go with them or turn around and find a way back to the QZ. You can’t do this anymore. It’s too hard and you know that it will never be you that he picks. Stupid of you to fall for a man who was obviously involved with someone whether or not he admitted it. Joel rolls his eyes, not answering you and you swallow harshly. “When we get to the state house-” You start, wanting to tell him your plan, but Tess comes hobbling up. 

“Come on, let's get there before it’s dark” She demands, impatient to get moving again as she swings herself onto the ladder. 

Ellie goes next and then you look at Joel who nods at you. You nod and make your way down the ladder, firm in your decision. Joel glances at his watch, thinking about Sarah, and forces himself to keep going. As you walk towards the state building, Joel glances down at Ellie’s arm. Cautious and wondering if she’s gonna turn at any second. When you arrive, there’s no one there and you duck behind a car to see if anyone shows. “Where the fuck are they?” Tess asks and Joel shakes his head, looking back at Tess before his eyes meet yours. 

He stands, rifle in his grip, and he makes his way over to the truck. Cautious and alert, he opens the passenger door and turns back to you, Tess and Ellie. “Stay back.” He orders, making his way around the truck to find the back is empty.

“Joel, what the fuck is going on?” You, Tess and Ellie come towards the truck and Joel shakes his head. 

“I don’t know.” 

You look around, a bad feeling settling in the pit of your stomach. “They went inside.” Ellie tells you, pointing to the blood on the ground and you sigh, knowing that is never a good sign. 

Tess seems to take this as a personal attack and grabs Ellie’s hand as she marches towards the steps. “Tess.” Joel huffs, making you roll your eyes but you follow are the pair. Not for Tess’s sake, but for the girls. You know Joel will be right behind you. You walk into the state house, finding all of the crew dead on the floor in the middle of a vegetation patch. 

“Holy shit.” Ellie hisses, and you have to agree. This is bad. 

“Fuck.” You hiss under your breath, checking for signs of FEDRA or if it was infected that got them. 

Tess searches the bodies, “I mean there’s gotta be a fucking radio or something, right?” She says, searching the crate closest to her. 

“Who killed them? FEDRA?” Ellie asks and you shrug, glancing back at Joel who pulls the body at his feet back onto its back. 

“No. One of them got bit. The healthy ones fought the sick ones. Everyone lost. Tess? What’re you doin’?” He asks, turning back towards her as she continues searching. 

Tess steps towards the girl and you edge your way in front of her to protect her. “Where did Marlene say that she was taking you? Ellie!” 

The girl steps forward, “uh. I don’t know. Just west.” 

Tess turns away, “just west. Fuck. Okay. Well, I mean one of them’s gotta have a map on them, right?” She says more to herself. “Joel, can you help me?” She asks, nearly begging. 

Joel shakes his head, “no! Tess, it’s over. We are going home.” He walks towards her, wanting to get everyone back to the QZ and safe. 

Tess growls, “that’s not my fucking home.” Joel stares at her, eyes unreadable as Tess stands up. “I’m stayin’.” She declares, “I mean, our luck had to run out sooner or later.” 

Joel’s face falls and your eyes widen just as Ellie says, “fuck. She’s infected.” Joel turns back to Tess, staring at her, almost begging her with his eyes for that to not be true.

“Show me.” Joel demands and you can hear the agony in the two words. He doesn’t want to believe it, doesn’t want it to be true. Your stomach drops, hating that she has been infected despite your differences. It didn’t mean you wanted her dead. 

“Joel.” She takes a step towards him and instinctively, he jolts backwards, pulling away from her. You walk towards the kid and put your arm around her shoulder gently, wanting to comfort her. Tess pulls her jacket away so you can see the bite on her neck and you close your eyes. “Oops.” She jokes. “Right?’ She turns to Ellie. “Take your bandage off.” You help Ellie take the bandage off to reveal that her own wounds from the clickers haven���t gotten any worse. She’s not infected. Walking over, she takes the girl's arm. “Look, Joel.” She demands, holding it up for  him to inspect. “This is real. Joel she’s fucking real.” She insists. “I need you to get her to Bill and Franks.” 

“No,” Joel shakes his head. 

“They’ll  take her off your hands. They’ll handle it from here.” 

“No, no, no, I can’t. They won’t take her. They’re not going to take her.” He frowns. 

“They will ‘cause you’ll convince them.” Tess tells him. “Yes you will. I never ask you for anything. Not to feel the way I felt…” You frown in confusion, not understanding what the fuck she is talking about. Joel loves her. 

“No.” Joel shakes his head but Tess interrupts him. 

“Not to…shut the fuck up because I don’t have time.” Joel looks devastated and you clutch Ellie’s shoulder as you try not to react to this entire scene being played out in front of you. 

“This is your chance. You get her there, you keep her alive, and you set everything right. I know you don’t feel the same way I do but you need to stop burying your feelings. Life is too damn short to keep lying to yourself.” Tess says, her eyes meeting yours before she looks back at Joel’s. “All the shit we did…” She looks over at you, “he was gonna offer you up to Robert. He was gonna trade sex with you for the battery we needed.” 

Your jaw drops and Joel refuses to look at you, keeping his gaze on Tess’s. “Little puppy dog, always following him around. Thinkin’ you were the third wheel when it was always me.” Tess chuckles humorlessly and shakes her head. “Please say yes, Joel, please.” Tess begs and Joel’s gaze shifts over to you. 

The way you’re looking at him is enough to make him say no. He wants to protect you, protect the girl. He can’t do that if he takes you both to Bill and Frank’s. “Please.” Tess begs again just as the body behind Ellie shifts to crawl. 

“Oh fuck!” The teenager yells and ducks behind you and Joel when you move her out of the way. Joel doesn’t hesitate to take his gun out, killing the bastard, and his jaw is clenched when he sees the fungus curling around the dead digits. He looks towards the door and rushes past Tess to open it. Eyes panicked when he looks back after shutting the door. 

“How many?” Tess asks. 

“All of them. Maybe a minute.” Joel says, spinning around in a panic to face you but you refuse to meet his eye.

Tess gets to work, pushing over the barrels of gasoline, spilling it over the ornate tile floor. “What are you doing?” You ask and Tess answers with “making sure they don’t follow you.” 

Joel is frozen, facing the reality that the woman who’s been his right hand for so long is not walking out of this building with him. He steps closer to her, grenades roll across the floor. “Joel.” Tess moves to stand in front of him. “Joel.” She repeats and he finally meets her gaze. “Save who you can save.” She orders, her eyes flicking over to you before she meets his dark stare. 

He’s struggling. Part of him wants to drag Tess out of here but the other side of him wants to keep you safe. He’s torn and eventually, the side of the living wins. He stares at Tess, offering her a small nod, and he spins, grabbing Ellie’s hand and wrapping his arm around your waist. “Stop! We’re not leaving her. Get off of me you fucker! I’m not going with you!” Ellie shouts and you let Joel drag you out of the building. He’s frantic to get you away before the building explodes with Tess inside of it. 

“Hurry up.” He growls, dragging you both until you’re far enough away. He ducks down as the glass explodes, shoving you on the floor, and he grabs his rifle to aim it in case any infected chase after you. 

Ellie stands beside him, watching their bodies fall to the floor with the flames, and Joel eventually lowers the gun. “Joel…” You trail off and he shakes his head, turning to walk away. Ellie lingers for a moment until you step forward to follow him.

Your jaw rocks and you shake your head, unable to believe that he had refused to even talk to you after Tess dropped that bomb on you. At least she told you before she died, even though it was supposed to be one last barb through your heart. “I’m not going.” You decide, stopping short, only a few hundred feet from where you had watched the building explode. “This is your mission. For Tess.” You turn around and start walking back the way you just came, sure that the infected will be burned now given the size of the fire bomb and the smoke still billowing from the building.

Joel pauses, watching you for a moment until he strides forward to grab your wrist, pulling you back to stop you walking away. “You ain’t going anywhere. It’s too dangerous. Stop movin’.” He growls when you try to pull out of his grip. “I don’t understand. What - why you wanna go back?”

Instead of trying to pull out of his grip, you spin around, slapping him across his cheek. “You fucking bastard!” You hiss, yanking your wrist away from him as he loosens his grip in shock. “You were going to- going to fucking sell me to Robert for your fucking battery!” Hot tears spill down your cheeks and you don’t even bother wiping them away. “I knew you didn’t-“ you break off, “fuck you, Miller.”

Joel is shocked that you slapped him and he hisses, “Jesus Christ.” He curses Tess despite her soul not even leaving the damn earth yet. “I didn’t sell you. He wanted you and I said no. I fuckin’ told him no.” He clarifies, ignoring the wide eyed look from Ellie. 

“Tell me you didn’t think about it.” You challenge him, chest heaving as you step closer and square up to him. “Tell me that you didn’t consider it.” Joel doesn’t answer you and your chin trembles when you see the guilt in his eyes. “I thought so.” You choke out. “I fucking loved you and you were going to whore me out to save money and get your goddamn battery.”

He shakes his head, “no baby. I didn’t - I didn’t do it though.” He chokes, knowing you hate him and he doesn’t know why that destroys him when he’s fought so hard to keep you at arms length. “You can’t love me, okay? I’m - I’m a fucking mess and I was fooling around with Tess until I realized that I -” He cuts himself off, knowing that it’s getting dangerous.

“Until you what? Couldn’t whore her out?” You spit, shaking your head at him. “I put up with the stupid fucking nickname. ‘Puppy dog’.” You sneer. “Guess that’s what I was, huh? A stupid little puppy dog that doesn’t fucking realize she’s not wanted. Following you around, helping you, trying to make you- fuck, I don’t know.” You lift your hands helplessly and slap them down against your thighs. “Make you love me, I guess. But that’ll never happen. I’m not Tess.” You close your eyes, and sigh. “Just- go to take Ellie where Tess wanted you to, go find your brother. I’ll- I’ll be fine. I’m not your problem.”

He knows he will lose you forever if he lets you go now and he’s lost so much in his life. The burden he carries every damn day with each life he loses around him. He can’t lose you too. He brushes over what you said to finish his own sentence. “I was fooling around with Tess until I realized that I was fuckin’ in love with you and Jesus fuckin’ Christ that terrifies me.” He confesses, chest heaving.

You frown, not believing him for a second. “Don’t lie to me, Joel.” You sob out angrily. “You at least owe me the fucking truth.” 

Ellie steps forward. “Hey so, uh- it’s-“ 

You turn around and glare at her. “Not now!” You hiss, wanting to finish this so you can leave and find some place to hole up for the night before sneaking back into the QZ. “She was practically living in your apartment. She was there every damn night. Now you want to tell me you weren’t fucking her?”

“I stopped. We weren’t - we were plannin’ the smuggling. We weren’t doing shit other than figurin’ out how to get shit past the wall, past FEDRA. Jesus, sweetheart, I didn’t - I don’t want to put you in danger. I’ve been tryin’ to keep you safe. Tess knew how I feel. Shit, she was jealous and that’s why she called you my puppy dog. I should’ve stopped it but doing that wouldn’t meant acknowledging these fuckin’ feelings that I’ve been tryin’ to squash down. Love doesn’t succeed in this goddamn hellhole. Love is a weakness and I - shit - you make me weaker than a paper straw under a one ton weight.”

You don’t know if you believe him. The sting of finding out that he had even thought about giving you to Robert, even for a moment, stings. But you know it would be safer for Ellie if there was more than one capable adult looking out for her ass. There’s enough of you that immediately wants to forgive Joel that you stare into his dark eyes for a moment before you nod. “Fine.” You whisper. “I’ll….go with you on this fucking haul.” 

Joel is relieved that you are coming along. He knows this conversation isn’t over but you need to get moving. Get to some kind of shelter before it gets dark. “Come on baby. We can talk later. Let’s get safe first.” He says, grabbing his rifle. Ellie raises her eyebrows at him as he walks past her. 

“Never knew you were so emotional, Joel.” She scoffs, remembering the books that would be passed around in secret at the school about romance and how the guy would kiss the girl after declaring he loved her.

Instead of following directly behind Joel,  you put the girl between you and him. Bringing up the rear for safety as well as to give you some space to allow for thinking about what the fuck you are going to do. You know Joel isn’t a ‘good man’ in the pre-end of the world morality. Maybe he was then, but this life, this world changed everyone - you included. You don’t even know as much as Tess might have, but you know that he had saved you when he could have killed you. That he didn’t give you to Robert. Biting your lip, you wonder if that’s why he was choking the bastard the day before yesterday. Not that it mattered, the fucker was dead. Sighing softly, you shift your gaze around the fading light to look for somewhere to safely pass the night. 

Joel guides you through the forest that is invading Boston, nature taking back what is rightfully hers. Joel sighs, holding his rifle, until he comes around a sheltered area. It’s not comfortable but it’s safe and that’s all that matters. “We will set up here.” He declares, watching the tree line for any disturbances and when he doesn’t find any, he shrugs his pack off.

You don’t speak, just shrug off your own pack and set it down as you start to get the area ready for the night. While the infected weren’t in this area, wild animals were. A fire would be necessary to keep them from getting too close and you know that the sun will be setting soon. You start to drag trash and debris closer, scrapping out an area to start the fire and pile things high. Joel can’t move much, not with his hand even though he would protest over it. 

Joel watches you start the fire and Ellie sits down on the ground, opening her pack to pull her sandwich out. She’s starving and she doesn’t want to wait to eat. When you’ve started the fire, Joel pulls out his food and water, holding it out towards you. “You gotta eat, sweetheart.” He says, watching you sit down across from him. He will mourn Tess later when he takes watch. He doesn’t want to show his emotions now when you’ve shattered him with your onslaught.

Shaking your head, you don’t take his offerings. “You need it more than me.” You tell him as you reach for your own pack. “I have my own but I just-” You bite your lip. “I’m going to sleep first. You take first watch and wake me in a few hours.” You don’t let him argue, setting your pack up as a pillow and turning your back on him and the girl, curling in on yourself and forcing yourself to close your eyes. 

He doesn’t argue, knowing you need to rest and he needs time to think. Ellie looks at him as he starts to chew on the jerky and he ignores her raised eyebrows. “Don’t say a word, kid.” He orders, shaking his head after he swallows the chewy bark. 

Ellie rolls her eyes, “whatever dude. You can’t see what’s right in front of you. What Tess saw.” She says and continues eating. Joel grimaces, thinking of Tess. He tried to hide how he felt about you from her, thinking he had been successful but he wasn’t.

You don’t know how long you’ve been asleep, but your jerk awake with a gasp. Your hand reaches for the gun that is right next to you and you flip over to try to figure out what woke you. The fire is still burning and the kid is curled but about five feet from you, wedged between the concrete wall and the fire. Joel is still awake, his eyes watching as you sit up. “Shit.” You huff, putting the gun down and blinking rapidly. “Get some sleep, I’ll take over.” You promise, groaning quietly as you move to your feet to stretch.

Joel shakes his head, “no. I wanna talk. Come here.” He pats the space beside him, wanting you to come and sit down. 

You hesitate but eventually sit down beside him. “What is it Joel?” You murmur, not wanting to rehash this bullshit. 

“Shut up.” He orders and you open your mouth. “Shut the fuck up.” He hisses, pissed off with you. “I’m not gonna make this damn speech again, okay? I don’t do this shit. Not since before outbreak day. I - I love you. I don’t want to lose you. I don’t - I can’t lose someone else and I - I haven’t felt this way in so damn long and I tried to ignore it but I love you. I’m in love with you darlin’ and that fuckin’ terrifies me.”

His speech startles you, not expecting to hear something like that. Not from him. You close your eyes and absorb the words that you have wanted to hear for so long, believing them to be nothing more than a wistful dream. “I’m sorry.” You offer. “For that, I guess. For Tess.” You have to look away from his dark gaze, unable to look at him for too long without wanting to kiss him. “I’m not sorry that I love you though.” You murmur, looking into the fire. “It’s- it hurt everyday but it was worth it.”

He turns to look at you, his brown eyes almost orange as they reflect the flames of the fire. He’s slow, giving you a chance to pull away but he leans in, cupping your cheek. His calloused thumb caresses the skin there and he leans in to kiss your lips. It’s soft, the opposite of him, but he wants this moment to be good, to be memorable in case you don’t make it past tomorrow. In this life, every day is a bonus.

Eyes slipping closed, you want to live in this moment. Joel’s lips on yours makes your entire body tingle. Reaching up and taking his hand while your other finds his shoulders. Moaning softly because you can’t believe this is happening and you never expect it to be so gentle.

Joel groans softly into the kiss, grabbing your ass to pull you into his lap. Straddling him and he glances over your shoulder to make sure the kid is still asleep. “Fuck.” Joel groans when you are pressed against him, his lips finding your jaw and he kisses until his lips press against yours again.

You whine again his lips when his hands squeeze your ass just like you’ve imagined more times than you ever want to admit. Wrapping your arms around his neck and shamelessly grinding down on the bulge in his jeans that you had always salivated over. “Joel.” You whisper, not wanting to wake the kid. “I-“ he shushes you, pressing his lips to yours again.

His hands slide under your shirt, wanting to feel more of you, and he groans when you grind down on him again, cock hardening in his jeans. He thinks you’re gorgeous, fucking gorgeous, and he’s jerked off thinking about you too many lonely nights after he stopped sleeping with Tess. “We gotta be quiet.” He orders, sliding his hands higher so he can undo the clasp of your bra. He doesn’t take it off, just pushes it up your chest so he can slide his hands around your torso to cup your tits, squeezing them in his rough hands.

There’s a voice in the back of your mind that wonders if this is because Tess is dead. If you’re merely replacing her for him. You push it down, ignore it. You don’t care when you are getting to touch him like you’ve always wanted to. Ducking your head down and kissing the bare patch on his jaw like you’ve always wanted to. Your fingers fumbling with his belt as you try to get him free from his pants. You can’t ride him like this, not without taking your pants off and that’s dangerous. Hell, this is too dangerous really. You’re distracted by him.

He knows this is dangerous, the girl could wake up, but he desperately wants to feel you. He works on your pants, unbuttoning them and he shoves his hand inside, cupping your cunt after sliding under your panties. He finds you wet but not dripping and his fingers rub your clit after sliding through your folds.

You swear you’re going to bite through your lip trying to keep quiet. Loving the thick fingers you’ve watched so many times slide though your folds and press against your clit. “Joel.” You pant, needing more from him. “I- you have to fuck me.” You gasp out. “Please. Just- just once.” You know that he might change his mind come morning. That he could put that wall back up but you will be happy if you just get one night. “Please, baby. I need you.”

He nods, knowing he needs that connection. Losing Tess, nearly losing you, it’s been a long ass day and he wants to connect to you. He whispers for you to stand up and he withdraws his fingers, making you whine softly. When you stand, he pulls your jeans and panties down to your ankles, dragging you back into his lap so you are straddling him, cunt bare to the cool night air. He reaches down to take his cock out, “can’t cum inside of you. Gonna need you to let me drag you off when I cum.” He whispers, knowing he won’t risk you like that.

You nod quickly, readily agreeing to whatever he wants. “I know- it’s- it’s okay.” You promise, reaching down and wrapping your hand around the thick head of his cock and moaning quietly at the smear of pre-cum building up on the tip so gorgeously. “I-“ instead of telling him that you love him again, you rock your hips forward and line him up so you can sink down on him with a moan of his name that is pressed to his shoulder as you take him.

Fuck, you’re so tight. Hot and wet around him and you mean so much to him. His heart thumps in his chest while his cock twitches when you bottom out. “Fuckkkk.” He hisses through his teeth, hands gripping your ass and he struggles to remain calm as he allows you a moment to adjust around him. “Gotta be quiet.” He whispers in your ear, kissing the skin beneath it.

“You- you might have to cover my mouth.” You admit breathlessly, whispering the words to him as you flash him a quick smile. “Always been loud in bed.” An irony in a world where you’ve had to be silent at so many times when you just wanted to scream. Your fingers sink into his hair and you tug on it slightly as you start to move, wanting to ride him and eager to feel this incredible cock filling you more.

Joel knows he will want more after this. He’s already addicted to you and the thought of ever giving this up, you up, has him on edge. He presses his lips to yours, silencing you with his tongue, and he groans softly when your walls grip him tight when you find the angle that works for you. His hands slide up and down your back, squeezing your ass and enjoying how damn good you feel around him.

You try to stifle your sounds but it’s hard when he feels like he’s in your fucking throat. Stretching you out and making you feel more relaxed than you have in years, while craving more. Your tongue tangles with his while your thighs start to push up and down, moving yourself on his length in a way that keeps you as close as possible. Needing to feel every inch of him as much as you can.

Joel is trying to hang on to his composure, resist the urge to roll you over and just slam into you, fuck you into the ground, but he can’t. The kid is there. He can’t do that now. So he lets you lead, just pulling back to watch you work yourself on his cock. When your mouth opens to moan again, he shoves two fingers in there, wanting you to keep quiet. “Can’t wake the kid, darlin’. You gotta keep quiet.” He reminds you, leaning in to rasp in your ear.

His hands are dirty, filthy. You should want to spit them out but you don’t. Not even caring at this point. The feeling of his cock shredding up into you every time your hips fall is too good to care. His voice rumbling in your ear makes your cunt clench around him, swearing you can cum from him talking.

There’s so much to say to you and yet he can’t. The risk is too much, to both waking up the kid, and to his own heart. He can’t bring himself to say anything but he does lean in to kiss you, replacing his fingers with his lips, and his hand finds your clit. Rubbing tight circles in it as he gets closer to his own orgasm.

You whimper, groaning as he keeps rubbing your clit. Trying to keep quiet but it’s so hard when he feels this good. Your arms tighten around him and you kiss him harshly, feeling your cunt bottom out and your entire body light up with pleasure as you start to cum for him.

“That’s it baby.” Joel practically exhales into your mouth as you clamp down on his cock, body shaking against his. He pulls you closer, thrusting up into you as best he can until he’s pushing you onto the ground beside him, barely managing to shift onto his knees to cum on the dirt and not ruin your clothing. He pants, chest heaving while his cock twitches in his hand. “Jesus Christ.” He exhales, letting go of his cock to tuck himself away and he shuffles over to where you are on the ground. “Sorry baby. Couldn’t - needed to pull out.”

“It’s fine.” You pant, understanding why he needed to pull out, but wishing he hadn’t. “You can’t risk it.” You’ve never told him anyway and in the moment isn’t a good time anyway. It’s not like it matters anyway. You shuffle quietly, trying to pull your clothes back on and put yourself to rights.

Joel watches you put your clothes back on and once you’re settled, he reaches for your hand, dragging you close to wrap his arms around you. He breathes you in, relieved that he didn’t lose you today. He lost Tess, which he will process and grieve in his own way, but right now, he’s just happy to have you. He loves you, he really does. He wishes he had told you sooner but this life is unpredictable at the best of times. You have a journey ahead with him to get to Bill and Frank’s and he will do everything he can to keep you safe. Whatever it takes…he won’t lose anyone else he loves.

****

Joel reluctantly turns over the responsibility of watch to you. He needs rest, you know he didn’t sleep last night and he’s had a fucking hell of a day. You all had, but him most of all. Whatever him and Tess had been towards the end, he had cared for her in his own way and he needed to grieve her. You keep the fire crackling, staring into the flames when you aren’t watching the inky blackness around your small space and listening for more than the rustles of wildlife. Your jerky and your water bottle your own companions through the rest of the night until the first rays of sun peak over the horizon and the sky begins to brighten.

When Joel wakes up, you and Ellie are talking, and he winces at the sunlight, trying to figure out how long he’s been asleep.  “Why didn’t you wake me?” He grunts and you shake your head, “you needed to sleep.” 

Ellie nods, “yeah man. You had a rough day yesterday.” 

He sits up, running his fingers through his hair and he shifts to stand up. “We gotta get going. Get your shit together. I’m gonna take a piss.” He stumbles to the tree line, gun in hand and he checks his surroundings before he shoves the weapon in the back of his jeans and pulls his cock out to pee. When he returns, you’ve put the fire out and are ready to go. Joel grabs his pack and leads the way, rifle in hand.

You walk alongside Ellie for a bit, hanging back as you try to figure out how to tell Joel. You should, he deserves to know. “So, uh, did you work your shit out?” Ellie asks, making you look over at her. “Cause I don’t want it to be a tense trip.” She offers, making you snort. 

“It’s going to be a tense trip regardless.” You remind her, the journey is no walk in the park for sure. “But we’ve talked. While you were asleep.”

Ellie snorts, “talked. Sure.” She doesn’t believe you just talked. She’s not dumb. She learned about all that in school and she knows that’s how most adults show how they feel. You fluster and look at Joel as he strides ahead, rifle gripped in his hand. He sighs and looks over his shoulder at you and Ellie.

You see Joel jerk his head towards you, motioning for you to come up beside him. Eager to get away from Ellie’s prying questions, you hustle forward and catch up to him. “Something up?” You ask, wondering if he wants to talk about the plan for getting Ellie to Bill and Frank’s.

Joel turns to look at you as you come alongside him, “everything okay with the kid?” He asks and you nod, “yeah she’s good.” 

He sighs, “you think she’s gonna be okay with Bill and Frank?” You shrug, “who knows.” Joel glances behind him again to see Ellie looking around and he takes a chance to reach out and hold your hand.

Shocked, you look down at his large hand wrapped around yours, holding it tight and yet he’s not crushing it. Your heart thumps in your chest and it’s impossible to not fall more in love with him. “Joel- I need to tell you something.” You murmur softly, not wanting Ellie to hear.” You can feel him tense up but you squeeze his hand reassuringly. “It’s not- it’s nothing bad. Or, I guess it’s better to say, "I made peace with it a long time ago.” You take a deep breath. “You don’t have to worry about getting me pregnant.” You confess. “I can never have kids.”

Joel frowns, turning to look at you. "You can't - shit. Baby, I'm so sorry." He murmurs, knowing it must've been hard to process. "What - what did they say?" He is curious and wants to know why you can't have kids. He also wants to comfort you but all he can do is squeeze your hand. Even this is more intimacy than he is used to displaying.

“Premature ovarian failure.” You roll your eyes at the words that had been told you so many years ago. “Basically, I stop producing eggs.” You explain. “I found out about two years before the end of the world. So I guess it’s handy?” You try, your joke falling flat. “Not that I would want to have kids in a world like this. It’s not fair to them. Not fair to her.” You nod back towards Ellie. “I just- if we, you know, again….you don’t have to pull out if you don’t want to. If you do, I get it.”

Joel feels guilty that he is happy to hear he doesn't need to pull out but he's sad that you won't get to be a mom. You'd be good at it, even in this fucked up world. "I'm sorry you couldn't, you know, but, next time...I want you in a bed and I ain't gonna pull out." He murmurs so the kid can't hear.

You shiver slightly, happy to hear that there will be a next time if both of you can help it. You hum quietly and shoot him a small smirk. “Maybe we can find a hotel to spend the night in tonight.” You tease softly, not sure what awaits you on this journey but at least you’ll be there. By his side this time, instead of trailing along behind him like his little puppy.

[darkbluekies]

Can we have a sneak peak of ur upcoming ficc😩🙏 (ignore this if ur not comfortable)

of course <3

These two are the ones I've gotten far enough to know for certain that they will be published. I have a few more that I've only started on which future is unknown, but let me know of you want to see them too♡

Golden trial pt 2:

 Running along your left are cabins and to your right are windows. Silas opens a door and directs you inside the cabin. It’s a suite, and a gorgeous one a that. A king sized bed, couches, big windows, drapes and your own bathroom. Hedwig and Edmund sits on the couch doctor Kry is leaning against the window. Behind him, America swooshes past. 

“Here he is”, Jerry says.

“What’s going on?” you stutter. “What do you want?”

“We are not going to let you be alone in cargo hold”, Silas says. “We are not monsters.”

I’d beg to differ.

“We’ve decided that you are going to be by our sides so that we can keep an eye on you”, Hedwig says and smiles. “If you are in the cargo hold you could die.”

“You’re not going to wear the leash because that will cause people to be suspicious”, Doctor Kry says. “Yes, we are not the only ones on this train.”

“You will not talk to any of them”, Jerry says. 

“You will stay here in my cabin”, Silas says. “My second in command will be in Jerry’s cabin, so don’t think that you can do anything towards me. He’ll be just on the other side of the wall.”

He’s here too? 

Everyone leaves the suite but Silas. You sink down on the bed with your head in your hands. 

“Why do you do this?” you whisper.

Silas sits down beside you. “You did this to yourself”, he says, voice weirdly calm. “You put your nose into the wrong business, knowing that it could put your life in danger.”

“It was my job.”

Was. 

“I still don’t understand why they sent you on that ship without backup … or any kind of protection at all besides that pitiful gun. Almost like they wanted you to get caught.” Silas furrows his dark brows and looks at you, unreadable hint in his black eyes. “Are you even sure if they liked you at all?”

This has to be some kind of scare-tactic. Don’t fall for it.

“Of course they did”, you mumble. “I had a high position, a good salary … they liked me. They did.”

“Are you saying that to reassure me or you?”

Silas stands up and breathes out. 

“Let’s go eat lunch, I’m starving”, he says. “You must be hungry too, I heard from Hedwig that you didn’t eat dinner last night. Come now.”

Silas walks out of the room, holding the door open out to the corridor. His words ring in your mind. Who are you trying to reassure?

“I’m not waiting all day”, Silas calls out. “You’re not getting lunch if you stay in there.”

You hurry to stand up and follow him out to the corridor, having to pass him on the way. The thin corridor is big enough for one of you. He walks closely behind you, peering over your shoulder. You’re led into a restaurant car with tables of four, each having seats instead of tables. The carriage is divided in two with a with a glass wall with open space where a door normally sits. Silas chooses one of these seats. 

“Sit down”, he says. “Now. By the window.”

You give him a questionable look before sitting down in the seat closest to the window. Silas sits down beside you, blocking your escape to the middle aisle. His second in command is already sitting by the table in the seat in front of you. Silas holds three menus laying on the set table in front of you, giving you one. 

“Choose what you want”, he says. “I have money.”

“I don’t doubt that”, you mumble. “With your dirty businesses you must make a lot of money?”

Silas scoffs, but there’s a small smile tugging on his lips. “More than you can imagine, Golden Boy.”

Vacation with Silas family (no name yet)

In the living room you see two men situated on couches opposite each other. One you recognise and one you haven’t met before. The older man is an older version of Silas and the other one … Ares. Upon seeing him Silas tenses behind you and is quick to switch your positions. Ares smirks and rises from the couch.

“Silas, my brother”, he smiles.

“I’m not going to pretend that we’re friends for mom and dad”, he says in english, sounding monotone. “We can be civil at most.”

Ares looks at you, smile widening. “Nice to see you again, Y/N.”

“Ares”, Silas warns. “While we’re here you’re not going to talk to them.”

“They’re my sister/brother in law.”

“They’re nothing to you, because I don’t consider us family.”

“Silas”, you whisper in an attempt to stop the situation from escalating.

Silas glances at you and sighs, letting his shoulders fall.

Their father rises and shakes your hand. You smile at him. When he starts to talk to Silas, you feel a pair of hands on your shoulder and turn to see his mother wanting you to follow her. You come with her to the kitchen where you see multiple pots on the stove. She feeds you a spoonful of the different dishes and looks for your approval. You use your limited Greek to tell her that the dishes taste better than anything Silas has ever cooked for you before. The woman claps her hands together and gives you a bright smile. Even though you don’t speak the same language, you feel like you understand her fully.

“Y/N, come”, Silas says with his arms crossed over his chest. “We will have to decide the sleeping arrangements.”

You walk over to him and Ares. Their body languages are stiff, the air thick.

“We are taking the guest room”, Silas says coldly to his brother, “and you are staying out of it.”

“Where am I supposed to sleep?” Ares questions.

“Fuck do I know? With mom and dad?”

Ares scoffs. Silas grabs your arm and pulls you upstairs before any of them have time to say more. He opens a door and lets you go inside. He closes the door behind the two of you. The room lacks pretty much a personality, the only thing in here being a bed and a wardrobe. There are a painting of the sea and a succulent, nothing more. Silas sits down on the bed and runs his hand through his black hair.

“Fucking hell”, he breathes out and looks up at you. “I don’t know how I’m going to survive a week with him!”

[chuuyasheaven]

"Outsmartin' failed"— Fyodor & Dazai

"You have been having the weirdest dreams lately. Two handsome men, which were probably not human, have been appearing in your dreams a lot. In those dreams, they always try to seduce you. Since this started to worry you, you tried to just stay awake, but they were standing in front of you the next second. Was this a hallucination or real?"

Tags: Fyodor Dostoevsky, Dazai Osamu / afab! Reader, threesome, rough sex?, incubus! Fyozai, overstimulation, does this count as monster fucking?, idfk what's going on, oral sex (bj's and pussy eating), fingering, teasing, praising, pet names?, might contain grammar errors, discontinued and short, rushed probably, etc.

Notes: I want 2 experience this so badly tho idrk, also, this is gonna be left on Cliffhanger since I'm VERY busy atm . .

You're not sure if you're hallucinating or if this is actually happening, but either, this seemed to be better than any other dream, so why did you try to avoid it again? Oh, right, two demons, you're not really sure, kept appearing in your dreams. Not gonna lie, but they were attractive, which helped with their seductive attitude. Since it was kinda odd to you, you tried to stay awake to see what happens, which was one of the best mistakes you made that night. Because, they were suddenly in front of you, and the next thing you know they had you on your fours. .

On your fours, one dick in your mouth and fingers in your cunt. The brunette, Dazai, was the one fingering you. The black haired, Fyodor, was the one you were sucking off. And they were anything but gentle. Fyodor was grabbing your hair, forcing himself to go deeper into your throat, Dazai was behind you fingering you good. You tried to concentrate, you really did, but this was way to much to handle. "Awe, look at you, already drooling are we?", Fyodor recalled, drool rolling down past your lips. Your back was arching when Dazai found that one spot, you moaned around Fyodor's cock, leaving vibrations. As Fyodor was getting closer, you were seconds away from cumming with the way Dazai was fingering. Fyodor trusted into your mouth a couple times before cumming in your mouth. "Be a good girl and swallow,", he told you, you listened to Fyodor and did as he told you to. When Fyodor pulled out, there was some cum rolling down your lips, he wiped it away. "We can't let this go to waste, dear.", Fyodor held his finger in front of you with a little of his cum on it. You stuck out your tongue to lick it clean, holding eye contact with him as you did.

"Good girl.", you let his finger out of your mouth when Dazai hit that spot again, perfectly this time. Dazai was getting more aggressive with it, before you came all on his fingers almost screaming. You think that everything? Wrong, think again. They switched, Fyodor was behind you now, while Dazai was in front of you. Your breath hitched when Fyodor's tongue made it's way inside your cunt. You let your head sink at the pleasure, this did feel better than Dazai's fingers. Dazai grabbed your chin with his one hand, his eyes looking at you seductively. "Keep your eyes on me, 'donna, I have another job for you.", Dazai held up the fingers the pleasured you with, suggesting for you to lick them clean like you did with Fyodor. You fluttered your eyes close as you stuck out your tongue again, licking off your own cum, while Dazai was smirking at you shamelessly. Looking up to him to look at him innocently made him hard, what made him even harder was your moans those were caused by his partner. When your done, Dazai crouched to be on your level.

"Feels good, doesn't it?", he asked while staring into your eyes waiting for a response. Nodding, Dazai looked at you as if he expected words. "Y–yeah.", your flushed face amusing him. Dazai neared your lips until he was inches away. "You're so cute, y'know?", Dazai was kissing you before you could do anything else. He was kissing you roughly, his tongue now joining in, you moaned into the kiss while Fyodor found the spot with his tongue. Dazai pulled you closer, full on making out with you now, you were getting close to your second climax. Separating from the kiss for air, you were drooling again. "What, do I kiss that good?", he stood up with a smirk. "Are you done?", Dazai asked the black haired male. "Almost, as it seems,", Fyodor stated while his words sent vibrations into your cunt, which resulted into your second orgasm. Fyodor was making his way back to Dazai, looking down onto you with Dazai.

"—Who do you want to go first, me or Fyodor?"

I'm really sorry abt this, guys

[libbyfandom]

Heartbeat

(((This one got kind of, I don't know how to describe it other than I made my own heart sink. Yikes.)))

Possible Triggers: To cover it, there's one explicit sentence about SA. And Mizu has a breakdown.

“My son told me he spotted that Onryō that was seen outside the village.” You hear an older man’s voice a couple tables away as he sits down.

A second one answers, “The guards said he had a woman with him.”

The first man speaks quieter, in a hardened voice. “Truly?”

“Yes. The poor thing was following so close to it. Do your u think she’s controlled by it?”

You take a sip of your tea slowly, staring out the window as the last of the sun’s rays pull away from the street outside.

“But Onryō don’t enslave people, only torment or kill them, don’t they?”

“Maybe this one desired the girl for worse things.”

There’s an eerie lull in the two men’s conversation, imagining the horror of a demon growing in strength and lust for evil.

Your eyebrows furrow, and you stop the condescending sigh that’s rising in your chest.

“How would it even do that?”

Out of the corner of your eye you see the second man lean closer to his companion. “Maybe he ate her heart.”

Your fingers tighten on your cup, your mouth forming a thin line from how your body is slowly tensing up in anger.

“Think about it,” he continued, painting the scene. “The heart chakra is the center of compassion, empathy, forgiveness. An Onryō?” He chuckles darkly, shaking his head. “It’d tear it right from her chest and swallow it into his empty stomach. Instantly she’s tied to it forever, forced to follow the monster that has her heart and suffer it’s desires.”

You take a shaky breath through your nose, setting your cup down. Your stomach is tensing from the urge to find the nearest teapot and just upend the burning liquid over their heads with a impassive face as they scream and burn.

You’re about to stand up when a hand, slender but rough, wraps around your shoulder. A kasa blocks your side view of the men. A familiar pair of lips find their way to the spot behind your ear. “I’m done. Let’s get back to the room,” they murmur.

You try to tilt your head around her large hat to set your hardened eyes on the men again. You estimate if you could successfully make it over there before she grabs you.

“Don’t.”

You turn and look into blue eyes hidden by orange lenses.

“I’ve heard worse,” she utters plainly, glancing outside to see a passing guard. Her hand goes to the hilt of her sword.

The ends of her fingers trail down from your shoulder to press over your heart, feeling it beat under her touch.

A murmur. “Let’s go. Now.”

She guides you with a hand on the small of your back through the tables. You turn and stare with barely contained disgust at the men as you pass by, and it infuriates you when they don’t even notice.

Only a handful of steps away from them the first one blows out a deep breath. A low laugh. “Maybe if we follow the screams of a woman being savagely raped by a monster in the night we can kill it.”

Mizu’s steps slow to a stop.

Your lungs forget how to breathe.

Her hand wraps around your waist with the lightest touch.

The tearoom is so quiet. Your head slowly turns and see that the men are the last ones in there.

“Go back to the room,” her voice is so calm you feel an icy flush dart from your ears, down your neck and rapidly crawl over your spine. It’s that instinctual alarm when a dangerous being is near.

And now, after you felt your own moment of quivering anger, you’re forced to remember what true rage matured by decades of time looks like.

“Mi-“

Her grip tightens to a painful point, and you wince. “Now.”

Her thumb flicks the first several inches of her sword out of the sheath, the metal reflecting the red glow of candlelight.

Her eyes are staring straight ahead, but you know where her attention is now.

When you hesitate too long, she shoves you toward the door. You stumble, your head turning back to glance at the oblivious men. So unaware.

When you stare back at Mizu, her face is impassive. The candlelight in the tea house lights up the orange of her lenses, obscuring your ability to see her eyes anymore.

It’s just flames.

You’ve been pacing your room since you got back. The sky outside has lost the last traces of light.

The last time Mizu’s face was that eerily blank was months ago out in the woods. Ringo was off gathering herbs for dinner when Mizu sat beside you in front of the fire. She hadn’t said a word to either of you for hours.

Her hand had gone to your knee. “You asked me about my mother once,” she had started.

You hesitated, catching on to the weight of this impending conversation. “Yes.”

And then it all came out. She didn’t look at you once, staring into the fire the entire time. You don’t recall her even blinking as she laid everything out bare for you. Her hand clenched tighter and tighter on your knee as she spoke, her arm quivering.

There was only a few seconds between when she finished and Ringo appearing in the tree line again, shouting happily about what he found. You didn’t get a chance to say anything, her hand leaving your knee cold as she quickly retreated to the other side of camp without a word.

Your eyebrows furrow as you silently chew at your nail, your other arm wrapped around your middle.

‘Maybe I should go find Ringo.’

The two of you should go back and look for Mizu. It’s been too long.

You take several hurried steps toward the door when you hear the window slide open behind you, and the chill of the wind rushes in.

You turn, watching Mizu’s blood soaked body climb through the small window. Her sheath makes a muffled thump as she throws it into the room so she can heave herself in.

The blood soaked sheath leaves a short streak of red along the floor from where it slid to a stop.

Mizu’s feet settle on the ground, and she leans back against the open window with a neutral expression. It’s not like the one before, this one is her natural resting expression that isn’t devoid of life. A relief.

Her indifferent expression is normal. The blood soaking into her clothes is normal. The blood splattered across her face is normal.

Her red rimmed eyes are not normal.

She tilts her chin up at you and quirks an eyebrow as your gaze meets.

As if to say, ‘What?’

Mizu…

You silently walk closer, and you see how she leans back against the window as you do. Her bloodied hands clench around the windowsill.

Her eyes harden as you get closer, her jaw clenching. Warning.

But your eyes remain soft, open, unguarded. You reach out and cup the sides of her torso. Unafraid.

Your hands slowly smooth down her sides to her waist and back up. Back down. Again and again. Around her back where you’ve memorized each scar.

She silently, desperately tries to grasp for the last of her stoicism. But her grinding teeth begin to chatter, chest hitching with broken breathes. Her knuckles turn white with how hard she’s gripping the windowsill behind her.

You pry one hand off the window, and it takes several pulls on her wrist before she lets go.

Without breaking eye contact, you stare into her eyes as your hand guides hers to press against your heart. You fold your arms over hers, hugging her arm to your chest as your hand presses down on hers until she feels your heartbeat under her palm.

Constant and unwavering.

A singular, strangled sob tears from her tight throat and she’s crumpling. Tears burn down her cheeks as her form doubles over with the force of her soul finally finding the weak point to break the dam.

It’s you, it’s you, it’s always you and your love for her isn’t it?

Your hand still holds hers tight to your heart as you follow her shaking frame sinking to the floor.

Blood is soaking into your clothes at every point she touches you.

Her head is hanging down between her shoulders, heaving in air more and more and more until she unclenches her jaw and release an ear splitting scream so loud your own teeth clamp shut.

All you can do is hold her until the screaming stops.

When her muscles finally unclench, and her breathing is only a little ragged, you guide her down to lay on her back with her head on your lap.

She blinks up at you, exhaustion lining her wet face. It’s quiet again, so now you’re able to hear how your breathing is in sync.

Her hand, now cracking with dried blood, reaches up and curls around your wrist. Staring intently into your eyes, she guides it under her haori to her own heartbeat.

Blinking away your own tears, you lean over and press your lips to hers.

She closes her eyes as the weight of your hand settles there, and stays.

[peachesofteal]

Ok but the comic of the fantasy Ghost and Soap got me thinking about Princess Darling 😭

Princess darling who is a war prize for the guys? Who is delivered to them after the sacking of her father’s territory, a last ditch effort for him to save his neck? And they look like this?

18+ MDNI

“Take my daughter.” He wheedles, slick as a snake, eyes wide and desperate as the flick between them and you. “She’s pure.” Your mouth drops open in outrage, heart thundering in your chest loud enough it rattles your ear drums.

“Father-“ The one in the skull mask with a black hood tilts his head at the sound of your voice, towering over you, gloved fingers flexing on the hilt of his sword.

He can’t mean to give you to these men. They’re… so big. And half covered in blood.

“Quiet.” He snaps, silencing your protest. Your eyes find the floor, counting the grooves and ridges of the marble. Your ribs pressurize around your lungs, squeezing, kneading, keeping your breathing too light in your already too tight corset.

“Ye’ve naught been married?” The brown haired one cocks his head with interest, and your knees tremble. You try to look away, escape the burn of his ice blue eyes, intense gaze unwavering as bear down on you, and your cheeks heat beneath the scrutiny.

“P-please. I know she’s older but-“ You want to cry. Scream. You’ve never been married for many reasons. Not that he cares about a single one of them. Not that the health of his daughter, or her feelings, have ever mattered to him.

“That’s enough.” Skull mask says. He looks at his partner, silence louder than a scream. You can only see the one man’s eyes, but they squint for a moment, before relaxing.

And then, he nods.

“We accept.” Your father loosens a sigh, the exhale loud over the echo of your gasp.

“No!” It’s a sputter, desperate and shocked. “No! No, father- you- you can’t!” He can’t. He wouldn’t. Would he? Send you off with these… marauders?

“Be silent.” He whirls, hand darting through the air to grip your upper arm, fingertips sinking into your skin like daggers. The shriek is automatic, half instinct, half muscle memory, and you flinch away, but he doesn’t let go. He digs in, trying to drag you towards the two and you gasp for air, panic cooling your skin and the sweat on the back of your neck.

“Let me g-“ You scream, choke out a half cry, only for it to be stolen from your lips by the swing of a sword.

Blood spurts from your father’s elbow, where it’s been cut clean off, his forearm and hand falling limply away from your body, a ruby red fountain spraying all over your face, your chest, your dress.

Your father howls, hand going to clamp over where his arm is now a bloodied stump. You’re stunned, frozen in time, just watching as he stumbles to his knees, face twisted in anguish.

You’re so distracted, that you don’t even know the blue eyed man has come up behind you, wrapping a thick arm around your waist. You feel his mouth, his breath, ghosting along your ear, warmth tickling your skin as the skull face turns to give him a nod, sword hanging precariously over your father’s bent neck. “Time to go, love. Close those pretty eyes for me now.”

You don’t know why, but you do. You let your eyes slip closed, let this monster scoop you up, let him cradle you to his chest. If you keep your eyes closed, you can just pretend. Pretend this isn’t happening. Pretend it’s not real.

There’s noise in the background, but a big hand covers your ear, pressing you against his leathered armor, right over his heart.

“Good girl, darling.”

[justmediocrewriting]

Hello, saw your NSFW prompts and since there can be combinations, I'd really like to request 1, 15 and 30 with Zoro, just love to see soft dom Zoro taking care of reader! Only if it's OK with you and please take your time at your own pace! 😊

A/n: blurb? Who’s she? Y’all I got fucking carried away with this. Did not expect it to come out to this monster length, but oh well *shrugs*. I hope you all enjoy this one as much as I did!

Prompt(s): “is it your first time, baby?” – “you’re so damn tight.” – “think twice before you say yes; because once I start, I’m not stopping.” (#1, #15, #30)

Pairing: zoro x fem!reader

Word Count: 11k (jfc)

Warnings/tags: explicit sexual content, soft!dom zoro, virgin!reader, brief descriptions of virginity loss, soft!zoro, slow sex, porn with feelings, gentle!zoro, bigdick!zoro, cunnilingus, oral (m receiving), spit as lube, afab!reader, vaginal sex, multiple orgasms, unprotected sex, creampies, very small breeding kink, established relationship, first time together, language, dirty talk, does get slightly awkward at times because hey first times, duh. Zoro was drafted to be soft but rough!Zoro sort of took control of my mind oopsie

{{:================================:}}

“You’re nervous.”

Zoro’s statement wasn’t even a question — it was just a blatant observation, one that you had no doubt the perceptive swordsman would make quickly. Embarrassment clawed up your skin and you shifted in his lap, casting your eyes to the side to avoid looking into his; you hoped Zoro wouldn’t mistake your nerves for disinterest or something else of the sort, but you had a sinking feeling that that’s the only reasonable conclusion your actions would lead Zoro to.

Which was a bit disheartening, because this was something you wanted, something you’d thought about, a lot, it was just… kind of scary.

You weren’t a complete virgin, per se; you’d had some pretty serious sexual encounters with other men before Zoro, but there was a rather glaring difference between Zoro and your other partners — and that difference was standing at attention, digging in to your clothed core with the heat of a searing brand, thick and long and intimidating.

Zoro was fucking huge, and that was cause enough for your nerves and trepidation; libido and desire be damned.

“It’s just…you’re just… a bit… big…” you mumbled slowly, cheeks flaring with heat and stomach fluttering with nerves — your eyes flicked downward and that faint fluttering turned to full on somersaults when you caught sight of his bulge, right there and straining between your parted legs. How would that ever be able to fit…?

“We don’t have to do anything you aren’t ready for, y’know.” Zoro rumbled, voice thick with amusement, and he slid his hands up and down the length of your plush thighs in a manner that was simultaneously comforting and titillating.

“I don’t think I’ll ever be ready for it,” you muttered with a dry chuckle, attempting to release some of your nervous energy by fiddling with the loose strings of his shirt collar. Zoro’s mouth opened, more than likely to say something similar to “then we don’t have to do anything,” and you quickly cut him off before he could even start.

“But,” you flicked your eyes up to his bashfully, pinning your bottom lip between your teeth, your heart thundering within your chest and skin crawling with ants, “I want it.”

Zoro’s eyes widened fractionally and his lips opened in a small ‘o’, and in the next instant he let out a groan and slipped his eyes closed as he dug his head into the pillow behind him.

“Fuck, you can’t just say something like that.” Zoro wisped, fingers digging ever so slightly into your thighs and hips tensing beneath you, as if he was stopping them from bucking upwards.

Zoro’s reaction had some of your nerves slipping away to be replaced by a strange sort of confidence, and your fingers stilled in their twiddling of his shirt strings. You trailed your hand down until it rested just above his midsection, right between his pecs, and leaned down to ghost your lips over his. An excited tingle ran down your spine at the proximity.

“Why not? It’s true.”

Zoro popped open an eye lazily, drawing a triangle over your face once, then twice, and then suddenly he was shooting up with movements that were far too fast for you to catch with your eyes. You yelped when his hands detached from your thighs in favor of wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you close to him. Your faces were now inches apart, and you could feel more than see the smile on his lips.

“Are you sure that’s what you want, baby?”

Zoro’s eyes were twinkling, but they were also swimming with something serious, too. The look in his eyes had you second guessing yourself suddenly, your original fears being ripped back to the surface through your sudden bravado. Fooling around was one thing, but going all the way… that was another entirely, something that Zoro seemed to understand on a surprisingly deep level.

But there was something in Zoro’s eyes that told you he didn’t truly understand the reason behind your nervous hesitation, despite the fact that you’d told him just moments prior.

“I want to have sex,” you blurted out before you could filter it, your blatant admission knocking Zoro visibly off-balance as his face contorted into surprise. Already far enough gone, you pushed away the rest of your bashfulness and rushed out the rest of your conviction before Zoro could fully recover and somehow steal your ability to do so.

“I mean, we’ve been together for a while now, and I’ve been thinking about it, a lot; I know what I want, but it’s just…”

You couldn’t help but trail off, that branding heat between your legs, now crushed against you even tighter due to the change in position, acting as a physical manifestation of cause of your doubt. Surely Zoro — smart, attentive, perceptive Zoro — could grasp what your fear was without you blatantly spelling out once again.

Of course, you’d have no such luck; because Zoro was just a mischievous as he was perceptive, and he would never give up an opportunity to tease the hell out of you.

“It’s just ‘what’, baby?”

Shooting him a glare, you decided not to play into his game; he wanted to fluster you, and at the moment, you couldn’t handle that — and it seemed to have slipped Zoro’s mind that you could give just as good as you got; one of the biggest factors that contributed to Zoro’s initial attraction to you.

“Your dick’s too big.” You deadpanned, a small glimmer of satisfaction burning within your chest when Zoro’s expression turned to flat flabbergasted.

Shoot and score.

Zoro’s eyes narrowed and that flame of satisfaction was harshly doused by resignation.

Or not.

“You keep saying things like that and I may not be able to control myself.” Zoro said, and though his tone was even, his body had ultimately betrayed his true feelings when his cock twitched between your crushed bodies. You’d felt him do that before, the most frequent incident being just about ten minutes prior to this before Zoro had interrupted your heavy make out session, but feeling it do so during this particular conversation affected you in a way it hadn’t previously.

It turned you on immensely.

Goaded by Zoro’s clear interest and your own arousal, you shifted your hips ever so subtly, dragging your core against his hardness and subsequently pulling a breathy groan from the man.

“What if I don’t want you to?” You murmured against Zoro’s lips, dancing your fingers up Zoro’s ribcage in a featherlight touch. Zoro shivered beneath you and his eyes slipped closed momentarily, his cock responding to the stimulation with another harsh twitch.

But then his eyes popped open and your balance was upset when Zoro completely flipped your position, your back landing against the sheets sprawled out over the floor, Zoro’s large hands effectively muffling the impact — but even so, the makeshift pallet wasn’t the most comfortable thing, and you felt a sudden pang of sympathy for Zoro’s back, though the swordsman hadn’t even complained once during your previous engagement.

With the change in position came a shift in dynamic, and with Zoro looming over you, eyes hardened with seriousness and lips in a tight line, that brief flickering of bravado was silenced, and your skin flushed with bashfulness.

Zoro was silent above you for a long moment, his eyes searching, and though part of you wanted to break the eye contact, you couldn’t bring yourself to; something about his intensity demanded that the eye contact remain, and your body was helpless to its inclination to obey, your own nerves and sanity be damned.

“If this is what you want, you need to be sure.” Zoro rumbled, voice husky and deep, sending shivers down your spine.

“You need to think twice before you say yes; because once I start, I can’t guarantee I’ll stop.”

A lump lodged itself in your throat, a composition of nerves, trepidation, and excitement, growing larger with each second of eye contact that passed.

There was so much swimming within Zoro’s orbs, only a few of which you could confidently identify; arousal, excitement, uncertainty, and the faintest wisp of desperation — Zoro needed this consent, you realized with a start; because as much as Zoro wanted this too, he didn’t want to hurt you.

You’d been given your warning, generously so, and part of you wondered if you would get another after this should you choose not to heed it for now.

Part of you wondered if you even wanted another one.

Your stomach was alight with mixed sensations; arousal, nerves, trepidation, anticipation, excitement, love — and your body was itching with simultaneous urges; to pull Zoro’s lips to yours, to run away, to shove him off, to pull him closer, to just get on with it. Honestly, if this continued, your body would burst apart at the seams, until there was nothing left of you but a pile of goo.

To mute that erratic buzzing of your brain and body, you shot your hand up and grabbed Zoro’s nape, pulling him down to crush his lips to yours and initiate a rough dance.

Zoro was quick to respond, lips immediately finding the comfortable rhythm that you had failed to in your haste, caressing yours in that way that always sparked electricity across your skin.

You let out a small moan as you allowed yourself to follow his lead, which was surprisingly gentle and sensual despite the simmering tension the sudden liplock produced, and your body relaxed. This was familiar — the sensations from this was familiar — and it was successfully melting away that buzz that had been tormenting you. Zoro pulled a hand from beneath you and brought it up to your cheek, swiping his thumb across the skin in a tender caress, and your chest warmed significantly.

You were incredibly lucky to see this soft side of the strong, silent, stoic swordsman — incredibly lucky to know Zoro, to know him in intimate ways, to see past the brute strength and raw talent, to see deeper into who he truly was; flaws and all. You were lucky to be able to love him.

Zoro trusted you with this side of him, with his entirety; and you trusted Zoro, implicitly. Trusted him to care for your heart, mind and body.

There was no one else who was worthy of that trust.

You broke your liplock by turning your face to the side, nuzzling into the palm on your cheek and ghosting your lips over it tenderly. Zoro’s breath caught in his throat and his fingers twitched, on both the hand you were nuzzling into and the one still buried beneath your back, and you slowly opened your eyes to meet his.

“I trust you, Zoro.” You whispered, a sentiment breathed only into the bubble between the two of you, meant only for Zoro’s ears. Zoro’s onyx orbs shifted across your face, tracing over every detail etched into the flesh, searching, and after a moment, he smiled softly.

“Is that a ‘yes’?” Zoro asked, voice lowered to the same degree as yours, but shaky with something that stoked those burning embers in your gut. Zoro’s hand was just as shaky as his voice, fingertips sliding across your skin tenderly, his eyes taking on a hue of reverence as he stared down at you.

Trepidation once more fluttered in your chest, but it was heavily smothered by excitement and anticipation, and you swallowed it down as you nodded jerkily.

“Yeah, it is, Zoro.”

Zoro sucked in a sharp breath over his teeth and his lips were once more smothering yours, Zoro’s movements now taking on a hungrier edge, and you responded in kind, flicking your tongue against his bottom lip every so often and pulling trembling groans from his throat — Zoro was being far more vocal than he had been earlier, and it was absolutely stirring you up inside, because he sounded so beautiful.

Zoro’s palm removed itself from your face and slid down your bicep, then your arm, all the way down until he could grab your hand and pull it upwards, pinning it beside your face by enclosing it within his in an embrace. You couldn’t help but notice how much larger his hand was than yours, how easily it caged and encased yours, filling your chest with a sense of security and safety. The action seemed almost like an unspoken promise.

“I’ll take care of you.”

The sentiment somehow thickened the tension within you, arousal and anticipation growing ever more fierce in your gut, and now your hands were working over Zoro’s body — the hand still on his nape had morphed from a resting state to one of movement, fingers combing through the short hairs at the base of Zoro’s neck, and the other shot up to grope at his thick bicep, his forearm, his shoulder, his neck, his jaw; everywhere it could reach comfortably.

Zoro vibrated your lips with an appreciative hum, his other hand slipping from beneath you and trailing down your ribcage, ratcheting up the tension when it reached your thigh and squeezed. His feverish lips never left yours as he slid his hand beneath the crook of your knee and lifted your leg, hiking it over his hip until your heel rested against his lower back. The movement spread your legs and allowed Zoro to slot his hips between your thighs, and when his hand slid up once more to grab hold of your hip and keep you in place as he ground his clothed cock into your core, you couldn’t stop the loud moan that tore from your lips from the friction against your clit, which was now throbbing slightly.

Zoro sucked the sound down greedily, plunging his tongue into your open mouth roughly and exploring every inch of the wet crevice. Zoro’s tongue faintly tasted of the fruity wine he’d sampled earlier that evening, and though you weren’t a fan of alcohol, you found yourself growing addicted to the taste, and you slid your tongue sloppily against his to chase more of it.

Zoro’s hips continued to gyrate against you in slow, almost sloppy movements, his large cock twitching every so often, the combined sensations fogging up your brain and electrifying your skin. Zoro’s size was beginning to look less intimidating and more enticing to your hormone-wracked head.

Zoro’s hand slowly disentangled itself from yours and fell to your other hip, taking it in a firm grip and in working in unison with his other to hoist your bottom half up. Zoro shuffled himself beneath your bottom and then set your ass atop his thighs, your ankles subconsciously locking together behind his back and effectively holding you against his clothed cock while also freeing his hands.

“A natural, baby.” Zoro murmured against your lips, sliding a hand up and down your left leg in approval. You whimpered into his mouth and shifted your hips to move in time with his, electricity sparking up your spine as pleasure bloomed inside your clit from the friction. Zoro groaned in response, his hand stilling over your calf and then gripping it tightly, subtle pain exploding beneath his fingertips that only served to fan those embers in your gut. You could feel wetness forming between your folds, and you were suddenly bit with the need for relief.

The only problem was that you weren’t sure what relief your body was begging for.

The air was tense and simmering — what you and Zoro were engaging in wasn’t uncommon; but somehow, it was made so much more electrifying with the knowledge of the end goal, and it was driving you insane, stoking your libido to intensities that you hadn’t ever experienced in your life. But it was near suffocating, and it was bringing forth trickles of slight panic.

As if innately sensing this, Zoro slipping his tongue from your mouth and pulled away a few inches, taking with him that addictive sweet-wine and pleasant sensations. Zoro’s hips also stilled, and the combined losses pulled a whimper of dissatisfaction from your lips.

“Hey, look at me, baby.” Zoro cooed, and your eyes fluttered open to meet his; but even you could tell that they more than likely appeared hazy and unfocused to him, because you were finding it hard to concentrate with that hot buzz beneath your skin. But Zoro had told you to look at him, so you did your best to focus on his face, currently etched with seriousness.

“Do you really want this baby?” Zoro asked after his was placated enough by your attention, and it took you a bit of time to sober up and digest his words. When you did, you nodded eagerly, leaning your head up to chase after his lips again. But Zoro pulled his head back further, rejecting your advance and bringing a pout to your lips.

“You need to be sure. I need you to be sure.”

The desperation in Zoro’s words pulled you fully from that arousal-induced fog, and when you looked into his eyes, you saw the glimmer of something you never thought you’d see within his eyes — fear. Your voice was stolen from you in the blink of an eye, and your heart constricted painfully within your chest.

“I-I won’t be able to stop myself; I need you to understand that. So if you don’t want this, if you aren’t ready, you need to push me away now.”

On your next inhale your chest filled with much more than just oxygen; it was about to burst with pure affection and love, with adoration and pride, with lust and desire, all directed towards the foreign uncertainty plaguing your routinely stoic lover. You surged up quickly and slotted your lips against Zoro’s before the man had the chance to pull back, but you didn’t try to evolve the kiss into something more.

This was reassurance, and nothing more.

You pulled back after a solid few seconds of contact, and with as much conviction as you could muster, you swiped your thumb across his nape and whispered, “I’m sure, Zoro. I want you to take me.”

The groan your words pulled from Zoro was deep, guttural, and completely unhinged; his hips bucked forward and he shoved his face into the crook of his neck, his breaths fanning hot over the sensitive skin.

“Fuck, you don’t — you can’t — shit, you have no idea what you’re doing to me right now.”

Zoro’s statement had your chest feeling giddy with confidence, and you bucked your hips up to grind your core against his hardness, pulling another groan from him and earning a slight pinch to your calf.

“I think I have a faint idea.” You said cheekily, bumping your heel teasingly into his lower back. Zoro chuckled airily into the crook of your neck, and after a moment’s silence, he retracted his face and stared down at you with that serious expression again, and it was beginning to kind of irritate you.

“If we’re going to do this, you have to do everything I say, okay?” Zoro rumbled, pulling a small smirk and a raised brow from you in response.

“Power play, huh? Kinky. I like it.”

Zoro shook his head but the quirk of his lips told you that he still found some amusement in your statement. “I’m being serious.”

“So am I.” You retorted back, and found yourself slightly flustered by the truthfulness of your sentiment. The thought of Zoro doling out orders, guiding you on what to do, when to do it and how… it was more than a little exciting.

Zoro’s breath left him in a furious exhale and his eyes clenched closed, the fierce throb of his cock against your clit topping off his rather stimulating reaction.

“Okay, fuck, okay, yeah. For right now, just follow my lead and do what feels natural.” Zoro explained, eyes opening again and near pitch black from the dilation of his pupils. Zoro was so turned on, and it was only serving to turn you on even more.

“Yes, sir.” You whispered back, voice low and sultry, both teasing and genuine, and Zoro growled in response before leaning down to capture your lips in a crushing kiss. His lips moved against yours hotly, fervently, as if he was trying to devour you.

You tried your best to keep up with Zoro, but his lips were fast, as were his hands, sliding and groping and pinching at every bit of skin, clothed and not, that he could reach.

“Fuck, these clothes need to be off,” Zoro growled, hands twisting into the hem of your shirt and pulling it up. You arched your back to allow him better access, and within moments you were left clad in just your thin bra. Zoro immediately leaned back down to place wet, heated kisses along the top of your breasts, trailing hot breaths along your skin as he worked his hands up and down your sides.

“Zoro,” you gasped out, tangling your fingers into the fine hair at the base of his neck, the passionate attention against your skin throwing a stone of pure arousal into your gut, your hips twitching and bucking against the heat of his cock. Wetness smeared along the inside of your panties, copious in its volume and far slicker than anything you’d produced before.

“Fuck, you have no idea how much I’ve thought about this,” Zoro growled into your skin, humping against your gyrating hips and dragging his cock across your clit in a way that sent pure tingles up your spine. “How long I’ve wanted to fuck you. I’ve been so patient.”

Fiery arousal licked up your entire body, Zoro’s admission sending you to just the right side of crazy. You combed your fingers up his skull until you reached the thickest spot of hair, then tangled your fingers within lightly and pushed his head further against your breasts, sighing out softly at the graze of teeth along the flesh.

“Yes, yes, you’ve been so patient, baby.” You murmured, lips tingling with the urge to feel his. “I kept you waiting so long. I’m sorry.”

As if innately sensing your desire, or maybe suddenly overcome with his own, Zoro’s lips retracted from your breast and he leaned his head up just far enough to crash his mouth into yours, colliding your lips in a series of hot, open mouthed kisses. Drool slipped down the corner of your mouth, but your brain didn’t have the capacity to truly focus on the sensation when it was so preoccupied by the pleasure of Zoro’s bucking hips and the branding of his lips.

Zoro was panting and groaning into your mouth, the sounds growing in volume as his hips picked up speed, accelerating to a pace that it felt as though he was trying to fuck you through the layers of clothes. Your pussy throbbed and gushed at the thought, and you moaned deeply into his mouth.

Your other hand traced down the outline of his muscles through his shirt, dipping into the defined ridges and lines and tracing over the heated skin. In response, Zoro tucked his hands beneath your back and raised your torso up until it could press flush against his, crushing your hand between your bodies. Zoro’s thrusts never faltered, and the new proximity had your head completely melting.

But even so you could still latch onto one coherent thought, and that was that Zoro’s shirt should be off. Right now.

Breaking the heated embrace of your lips you slid your hand from his hair and down until your fingertips dipped into his haramaki, fumbling around until they grazed the hem of his shirt tucked beneath.

“Shirt. Off.” You whispered, earning a huffy chuckle from the swordsman and a breathy “as you wish.”

Zoro disconnected your bodies and set you back gently on the sheets, rising to rest on his knees, which were still tucked beneath the globes of your ass. You watched with growing anticipation as Zoro shuffled his haramaki down and untucked his shirt from it, pulling the hem up and over those fucking abs, shit, they were fucking delicious — and that toned chest with those pecs, those strong, broad shoulders, fuck — the sight made your brain fog even more than before. You continued to gawk at his bare torso even as he eventually discarded his shirt to an unknown corner of the room, eyes too focused on the art in front of you to register the sly smirk that pulled his lips.

“Like what you see, baby?” Zoro quizzed, and you couldn’t even find the capacity to dredge up any bashfulness or indignation at his confidence. You only nodded, mouth feeling awfully heavy all of the sudden.

That beautiful sight was robbed when Zoro leaned down and bracketed your head with his forearms on either side, his breath ghosting over your lips as he said, rather sweetly, “so do I.”

Zoro’s lips were soft when he captured yours in a gentle embrace, one that was far different to the hungry, avid caresses of earlier. Even lacking that heat, the sensuality behind it affected you just as deeply, and your pussy once again throbbed, and you found yourself wanting more; more skin, more contact, more Zoro.

To iterate this point you pressed back against Zoro with a bit more heat behind your lips, swiping your tongue across his bottom lip in an effort to draw out his own wine-drenched muscle. Zoro happily obliged the silent command, and once again your kiss melted into a hot, sticky, messy dance, full of teeth and tangled tongues and serenaded by slick slaps and squelches.

Your head was getting fuzzy again. All you could think about was Zoro.

You whimpered into his mouth and bucked your hips, tempting his into driving into your core once again, and the man followed through, his breaths turning to hot pants as he picked up his previous pace.

“Gods, I can’t wait to be inside you.” Zoro growled against your lips, breaking your liplock to lean back and stare heatedly into your eyes. “I’ve been thinking about doing this for so long; ever since you told me you’ve never gone all the way before.”

Your breath stalled in your throat and your pussy gushed out more liquid against his cock, his words stirring your gut up in ways you never thought possible. Wetting your lips you breathed out a shaky, “yeah?”

“Fuck, yeah.” Zoro confirmed, leaning down to rub his nose along your racing pulse point. Zoro gripped your left hip and rocked his hips into yours with more force, your tits bouncing from the velocity of it. The rough treatment to your clit had it throbbing heavily, and your gut cinched in a way that was near terrifying due to its foreignness. “It’s so fucking hot to be your first. To be the first dick to split you open and show you heaven.”

Your back arched and tingles shot through your hips, electricity sparking within your very muscles as moans were pulled from throat and that cinched something snapped inside your gut, and your clit seemed to suddenly develop its own heartbeat as your body tensed completely.

What the fuck just happened?

It felt… like an orgasm, but it was far more intense than you’d ever had in your life.

“Fuck, baby, did you just come?” Zoro growled into your skin, hips slowing to a smooth rocking. You could only nod, completely flabbergasted, as the waves of your orgasm receded until they faded completely and your skin flushed with embarrassment.

“That’s so goddamn hot, fuck. I’ve gotta get a taste.”

Before you could fully comprehend his words and react Zoro had dislodged your legs from around his waist and shuffled down and was in the process of pulling down the hem of your shorts. With a small squeal that you would deny ever making you gripped his wrists to halt his movements. Zoro’s eyes, glimmering with excitement and now frustration, bore daggers into your own wide ones.

“W-what are you doing?” You asked, voice a little shrill, which prompted Zoro to raise a brow and tug lightly on your shorts.

“Getting a taste. Now let go.” He said flippantly, batting your hands away from his, as if his actions weren’t currently heating you to the temperature of combustion. Of all the experience you currently had, receiving oral was not among the list; all your previous partners never bothered to indulge in it, and Zoro’s inclination to do so struck a chord of uncertainty within you.

“But—”

“I thought you were going to do everything I say?” Zoro rebutted before you could get any more words out, and any remaining arguments were stolen straight from your tongue. Satisfied by your complacency Zoro focused on the task of shedding you of your shorts, peeling them from your ankles and throwing them into a darkened corner of the room. You flushed when you heard Zoro take a sharp inhale, and your hips twitched ever so slightly when he ran his fingers over the lacy patterns of your panties.

“Oh, fuck…” Zoro breathed out, fingers sliding dangerously low, stopping just centimeters above your core. “You’re so wet. I can see it straight through them.”

“Shut up,” you whimpered without any real heat, cinching your eyes shut and balling your fists at your sides.

“No need to be embarrassed,” Zoro tutted, sliding a finger directly over your core and pulling a surprised noise from your lips. “It’s hot as fuck. And besides, you’re going to need this if you expect to take me without breaking in half.”

Those words should have ripped your earlier and fear and trepidation right back to the surface, but it did the exact opposite — instead, your body trembled and the moan that fell from your lips was so wanton that you couldn’t hardly believe it came from you. You fucking wanted it, and you wanted it bad.

“Shit, that got you excited baby? Let me see how much.” Zoro growled, hooking his thumbs into your panties and pulling them down and completely off in one swift movement. Cold air slapped against your heated core and your legs slammed shut instinctively — except, they were stopped almost immediately by Zoro’s ribs, and you shot up from your laying position when the cold was replaced by searing heat.

Your folds were parted by Zoro’s insistent tongue, which, after gathering up every bit of slick it could, quickly found a place against your clit, which he abused immediately with firm presses and fast circles.

“Oh, my gods,” you said on a shaky exhale, pleasure zipping through your entire core at each lick and twirl Zoro laved against your clit. You expected your previous orgasm to dull the intensity of the pleasure, but if anything, it only deepened it, and you were helpless to stop the moans falling from your mouth or the subtle rocking of your hips. Your limbs were beginning to feel weak, so you leaned back to rest on your elbows, eyes focused on Zoro’s head between your thighs.

The sight was so erotic, made even more so by the symphonies of wet lapping and groaning that glided up to tickle your ears. Zoro’s eyes were darkened as they peered into yours, tongue completely tearing you apart with fast, firm movements, reducing you to nothing but putty at Zoro’s mercy.

“Fuck, h-how are you so good at th-that?” You asked, a moan catching in your throat when Zoro’s tongue once again dipped down and parted your folds to gather up the slick that had accumulated there during his focus on your clit. Zoro didn’t answer you, not that you necessarily expected him to, but his tongue became ever more aggressive, now alternating between abusing your clit, parting your folds, and even plunging ever so slightly into your tight cunt — he was assaulting you with a myriad of movements, shifting between them at a speed of which your foggy brain couldn’t dare to try to anticipate the next, and you could feel another orgasm building.

Shit, this felt better than you ever imagined.

Zoro knew when you had finally reached that edge, eyes reading your movements like a hawk, and he was quick to up the ante on your clit in order to push you over. Your second orgasm of the night, much more anticipated than the first, crashed over you silently, your entire body curling in on itself and your thighs strangling Zoro’s ribs as your mouth popped open and your legs shook. Zoro continued to lap at your pussy as you rode your high, up until the point that you had to reach down and tug at his hair to pull him away due to the pleasure turning to pain from overstimulation.

Zoro was quick to climb up your body and crash his lips to yours, tongue plunging itself past your lips and spreading your spend across your own taste buds. Your expectations were once again defied as you found yourself finding the taste and action highly erotic, and you hooked a shaky leg over Zoro’s waist to pull his cock flush against your throbbing, sopping cunt as you reciprocated the kiss. You moaned deeply into his mouth as you registered that his cock was even harder than before, straining against his pants in a way that had to be uncomfortable.

You pushed against Zoro’s chest and disconnected your lips. “Y-you too. I wanna do it to you, too.” You whimpered, pulling a groan and faint buck of hips from Zoro.

“You don’t have to,” Zoro murmured, but his tone was shaky and excited, and it was fairly clear to you that he greatly favored the idea. With a small shake of your head you pressed against his chest more insistently, prompting him to clamber off of you.

With as much bravado as you could muster you ordered Zoro to lie on his back, which he smoothly obliged to, crossing his arms behind his head over the pillow. You shuffled up the length of his body until you could plant your rear on his thighs, excitement tingling up your spine as you were able to get another good look at his defined torso — of those broad muscles and that firm chest, those tempting abs and that v-line carved by the gods which led all the way down to his cock, which was standing in a proud tent between his legs. So big and thick.

You swallowed down your sudden nerves and reached out tentatively to plant your palm just beneath his navel, sucking in a sharp breath at the firm muscle beneath. It sent shudders of arousal through your body — his body was just too sexy, all firm and sculpted, every angle sharp and defined.

“Are you just gonna stare or are you gonna do something?” Zoro drawled, snapping you out of your reverie. Your eyes met his, which were twinkling with amusement, and you huffed out a laugh, feeling more than a little awkward at being caught; even though the events that had just transpired should be far more embarrassing than being caught gawking at him.

You slid your hand down, intent on unbuttoning Zoro’s pants, but found a hindrance in the form of his haramaki, which was still wrapped around his waist. You sighed and tapped the red stretch of fabric.

“You’ll need to take this off, Zoro.” You murmured, tracing the lines with the tip of your fingers.

“Nah, just push it up. I’m comfortable here.” Zoro responded coolly, and you rolled your eyes at his antics.

“You’ll still need to lift up a little in order for me to do that.”

Zoro huffed but complied nonetheless, lifting his torso up and surprising you by lifting the haramaki up himself and hiking it until it rested just below his pecs before returning to his original position. Somehow, the sight was incredibly erotic, and you felt your pussy suddenly heat up and clench around nothing. To your relief, the brief interaction between the two of you had wiped away the nervous energy you had developed, and when you finally unbuttoned Zoro’s pants and sprung his cock free, all you could feel was red hot arousal and anticipation.

You knew that Zoro was huge, but what you felt through his pants didn’t do any justice to his true size. Drool accumulated quickly in your mouth as you gazed at his hard-on, standing straight up, long and thick, thicker than any other other cock you’d ever seen, with a tan base nestled into fine pubes and a bulbous tip, which was already leaking clear fluid.

“Oh, fuck.” You breathed out, eyes wide and lips parted. It looked so… tantalizing, and the stretch promised to your mouth and throat was far too enticing for you to stall any longer. You wrapped a gentle hand around Zoro, pulling a small groan from his lips, and pumped it up once, reveling in the way he fit inside your palm.

You shifted your hips and nearly gasped when your bare clit rubbed against the rough fabric of his pants, stretched taut over the muscle of his thigh, and before you could stop yourself you began gently thrusting your hips forward, chasing more of that pleasurable friction.

Your actions pulled a small chuckle from Zoro, prompting you to flick your eyes up to his. With a boyish smirk that shouldn’t have been so hot Zoro asked, “are you gonna get off on my thigh while you suck me?”

“Maybe I will,” you shot back, suddenly wanting nothing more than to wipe that cool smirk of his face, to suck that nonchalant bravado straight into desperation — you leaned down and closed your lips around his tip, dipping your tongue into the slit and gathering up the salty pre beaded within before circling it with the flat of your tongue.

“Shit.” Zoro hissed, hips jerking upward and cramming more of his cock past your lips, the sudden and visceral reaction sending heat straight to your cunt. Zoro’s taste was heady and salty, settling on your tongue almost as heavy as his cock itself — and it was driving you crazy, the effects of his taste more powerful than an aphrodisiac.

You abandoned his tip in favor of swallowing down more of his cock, getting only to about halfway before meeting the resistance of your throat — his tip was already teasing the sensitive flesh of your tonsils, filling out your mouth and spreading a soreness over your jaws that was simply satisfying. You’d sucked others off before, and enjoyed it a decent amount, but with Zoro… you were starting to wonder why you hadn’t done it sooner.

You bobbed your head up and down, stroking what you couldn’t fit with your hand, twisting it every so often, which pulled the most delicious reactions from Zoro; his hips would twitch as if he was holding back from fucking into your throat, and his hand had drifted down not too long after you started, grabbing your hair and wrapping it into a ponytail with his fist, and now he was guiding your speed using the leverage.

“Fuuuck, that’s it… feels so good, baby…” Zoro breathed, cock twitching against your tongue as if confirming his statement physically. You moaned around his cock, pulling another sweet sounding sigh from his lips. Zoro’s words and moans acted as the perfect encouragement, pushing you to widen your lips and take him just a little deeper, pressing on until his tip parted your tonsils and slid down your throat.

But you underestimated the effect that would have on Zoro, and in the next instant you gagged around his thickness as Zoro tightened his hold on your hair and held your head in place as he shoved his hips up, pushing his cock further into your throat and completely cutting off your air supply. You retracted your hand from his cock and placed both of your palms flat on his hips, desperately trying to shove them down and pull yourself off of his cock. But Zoro held fast, and his hips continued to buck against your hold, pulling wet gags and coughs from your throat as it was repeatedly speared by his dick.

“Come on, baby, bear with it. I’ve been waiting so long. Lemme fuck your face for a bit.” Zoro growled out breathily, and the command acted as some sort of relaxant to your muscles as you stopped resisting immediately, pussy beginning to throb from the sensation of your throat being opened up by his thick cock.

“Yeah, baby, good girl. Such a good girl. Sucking me so good. Get it nice and wet, princess. Go ahead and fuck yourself on my thigh, too.”

With that, Zoro set a relentless pace with his hips, repeatedly pushing his tip past your tonsils and forcing you to take him nearly to the hilt with every thrust. It hurt, you couldn’t breathe, but it was so fucking hot, the sounds and feeling of his cock slipping in and out of your mouth sloppily conjuring multiple fantasies of it doing the same to your pussy, ravaging it and destroying it. Zoro was fucking your mouth so fast, so hard, you could only imagine how it would feel inside your cunt. Your hips began to grind in fast, short thrusts against his thigh, your wetness soaking into the fabric of his pants, clit absolutely singing from the friction.

“Fuck, fuck, okay, enough. Don’t wanna cum yet.” Zoro huffed from between clenched teeth, pulling his cock free from your mouth with a wet pop. You coughed and blinked back tears, flicking your eyes up to meet Zoro’s, a shiver running up your spine at the sheer abyss they reflected; Zoro looked absolutely wrecked, his tan skin flushed and lips shiny with spit, sweat beading his forehead, which was dotted with stray hairs slickened to his skin.

Zoro looked fucking amazing, and your pussy clenched around nothing. You wanted to see more of that expression, wanted to watch his face contort into pleasure as he lost himself in your tight virgin hole — you weren’t sure where that scared, nervous girl from before had went, but there wasn’t a single trace of her in you now, and it seemed that Zoro had picked up on that, too.

“Get your ass up here,” he rasped huskily, and you obeyed immediately, skin pimpling when the tip of his cock brushed along the span of your torso the whole way up. God, he was so fucking huge.

“You’re gonna ride me, baby. Does that sound good to you?” Zoro asked, and you nodded fervently. Honestly, any position would be amazing, so it didn’t really bother you either way. Zoro smirked up at you and gripped your hips the moment they were within reach, planting you down just below his cock, which stood straight up, the tip slapping right above your belly button.

Zoro’s eyes zeroed in on the sight, and he breathed a curse under his breath — it seemed that the visual was highly stimulating to him.

“Fuck, baby. How deep do you think you can take it?”

You glanced down as well, nerves fluttering briefly in your stomach as you took in the sheer size of his cock, the visual aid providing you with an example of just how far his dick could actually go — and it was just as scary as it was enticing. That monster would stir you up completely.

“Probably not all the way,” you answered honestly, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth and worrying it. You definitely wouldn’t be able to take it all the way right now, but later on down the road…

“We have all the time in the world for that, baby,” Zoro mused, as if reading your thoughts, cock twitching against your stomach. “But right now, I really need to be inside you.”

Your throat vibrated with a deep moan and you lifted yourself on to your knees, shuffling forward until your core was positioned directly above Zoro’s cock. The nerves were back again, but you swallowed them down and lowered yourself slowly, gasping when his tip parted your folds and pressed ever so slightly against your entrance.

Fuck, it’s a lot bigger than I thought.

You screwed your eyes shut and took a deep breath, holding it inside your lungs as you forced yourself lower. Even with the aid of spit and slick, the press was highly uncomfortable, Zoro’s cockhead feeling too impossibly big to actually fit, and tears pricked in your eyes at the pain blooming across your cunt.

Zoro’s hands tightened on your hips, stilling your descent and coaxing your eyes open.

“We don’t have to do it.” Zoro said, gently, eyes soft and face sewn with slight worry.

For a reason that was completely inexplicable to you, Zoro’s expression and words struck a chord of frustration inside you — because there was something else in his eyes, too, something that said he didn’t think you could do this, that you couldn’t take the pain; and, even more irritatingly, that you didn’t want this nearly as much as he did.

In lieu of a verbal answer you placed one of your palms on his firm chest to stabilize yourself, the other reaching back to grab hold of his shin, and in one swift movement you slammed your hips down.

That one action set off an explosive chain reaction — pain ripped through your entire lower half, clawing its way up until it reached your stomach, which seemed to collapse and twist in on itself; Zoro’s hands flew from your hips and one covered your mouth and absorbed your scream while the other gripped the plump flesh of your thigh; Zoro’s torso had curled up from the pallet so that he could reach your body easier, and the shift in position caused his cock to dig painfully into your walls, which only resulted in more yelps and whimpers into his palm.

“Fuck, baby, shit, why — why did you do that?” Zoro whispered breathily, voice caught between seething and desperate, teeth clenched tightly and brows furrowed — the lines in his face were wrought with barely contained pleasure that bled through the disbelief.

Tears pricked warmly at the corners of your eyes as you stared down at him defiantly, triumph and withdrawal both trying desperately to win dominance over your body. Pain was still radiating between your shaking legs, the spear currently impaled in your cunt stretching you in all ways and to degrees you never once thought possible — you’d only ever managed to have a finger inside you, and even that stretch was uncomfortable, straining against your hymen, bringing forth more discomfort than pleasure; and Zoro’s dick offered that tenfold.

But you’d taken it. Even though it burned, it hurt, even though it was still hurting, pain blooming across your abdomen in frenzied waves — you were finally connected with Zoro in the way you’d craved for the past week. Your relationship had finally been taken to the most intimate of levels, and it was absolutely euphoric. You shook Zoro’s hand away from your lips so you could speak.

“B-because there’s no point in taking it slow,” you gasped out, fingers digging red crescents into Zoro’s flesh. “It’s going to hurt either way, and I’d rather get past the pain and get to the good part sooner.”

Zoro’s torso collapsed back onto the pallet and his lips parted in a heavy sigh. “You’re gonna fucking kill me.” Zoro breathed, eyes glued to the ceiling and wide with shock — and something else that you couldn’t put your finger on, but it stirred your gut nonetheless with its appearance.

You felt so fucking full — it felt as though Zoro’s cock had shot straight into your stomach, and when you shifted your hips ever so slightly, you yelped out at the intense pain that shot through your abdomen.

“Baby, don’t move yet,” Zoro groaned out, his entire body tensing beneath you. “You haven’t gotten used to it yet.”

“Only one way to do that,” you smarted back, holding in a deep breath and gyrating your hips, swallowing back a scream at the intense pain. Zoro’s cockhead was pressing against your cervix heavily and relentlessly — it was so much to take, and you hadnt fully recovered from the shock of taking him all the way in one shot.

“Fuck, stop,” Zoro’s growled, and you obeyed immediately, much to Zoro’s visible delight. His hands met your hips once more, fingers digging into the flesh, and pain zipped up your body when he gently gyrated his hips, his tip completely rearranging your cervix’s position, and at your gasp of pain he stopped.

“This position is too much for you.” Zoro murmured, tapping the back of your hip with his finger. “Lay back and let me do it.”

Truthfully, you were more than happy to let Zoro take control; the weight of controlling the pace when you were in so much pain was proving to be quite heavy, and you trusted Zoro to make it feel good — he could do so way better than you could.

You began to rise, slowing your ascent when Zoro commanded you to, and your pussy fluttered at the sedated slide of Zoro’s thick cock against your walls. It was a strange sensation, not completely painful but not completely pleasurable either — but it was intense, and when Zoro’s cock slid out with a soft, wet pop, you found yourself craving more of that sensation.

Your legs shook when you clambered back and off of him, pain still radiating within your lower belly even though his cock was no longer buried inside, and the rough, flat surface of the floor beneath the pallet felt like heaven to your exhausted body when you laid flush atop it.

Zoro was quick to follow you, climbing up your body and sidling between your legs with a comfortable weight. You couldn’t help but feel that he fit so perfectly between your thighs, as if the space between them was created just for him.

“Wrap your legs around me, baby.” Zoro gently commanded, a hand moving up to help you lift your leg and position it around his waist when he noticed the slight sluggishness of your movements. You locked your ankles together at the small of his back without prompting, which earned you a delicious coo of “good girl.”

“Hold on to me baby, it’s still going to hurt.” Zoro whispered, his voice filled with somethig soft, and you brought your hands up to connect your fingers together behind his warm nape. Excitement was fluttering in your chest, heart beating thunderously and breaths quick and heavy — even the promise of pain couldn’t dull your anticipation, and when Zoro slid a hand down to line himself up with your entrance, it simply multiplied tenfold.

“Breathe.” Zoro commanded, and you did so, only for the air to be directly punched from your lungs when Zoro slid his cock in, your walls spreading impossibly wide from the intrusion and fresh waves of pain crashing into your belly. You knew your hymen had broken when you slammed him in, knew that the tender membrane was no longer intact, but somehow your pussy was still ripping as if it was, the sensation simultaneously painful and breathtaking.

“Breathe, baby, breathe.” Zoro cooed, his voice an anchor to cling to as your body threatened to be pulled beneath the waves of pain, and you pulled his head down to crash his lips into yours.

Zoro’s lips felt like tender slices of heaven, soft and wet, and when they moved against yours in gentle caresses you felt utterly complete. Zoro was inside you, you were wrapped around him, walls fluttering, your bodies connected in a physical deepening of your bond. It was everything; and you wanted everything and more.

“Move, Zoro, please,” you whispered between kisses, body and mind overrun by the desire to please Zoro, for Zoro to please you, for that connection to be taken to new heights. Zoro groaned heavily against your lips, and his mouth swallowed the soft whimpers that were pulled from your throat as he began to pump his hips slowly.

Every thrust brought immeasurable amounts of pain, but it was overrun by pleasure that originated from more than just the physical slide of his cock against your walls; it was addicting, euphoric in its agony, and you needed more.

As if innately sensing your desires, Zoro’s hips picked up speed, his cock now battering into you at a velocity that was near too much, but it felt so heavenly — it put you on the brink of breaking, on the brink of completely losing your mind.

“Fuck, you’re so tight, baby.” Zoro moaned hotly into your mouth, his hips stuttering ever so slightly, his hand reaching up to grope at one of your tits, which were still covered by the fabric of your bra. Your breath hitched at the combined stimulation of his cock splitting your walls and his fingers massaging your flesh, the eagerness behind the gentle touch throwing your brain into a frenzy.

“D-does it hurt you?” You asked tentatively, amazed at your own ability to actually form and speak life into a coherent thought, and your question pulled a deep, dry chuckle from Zoro’s throat.

“Gods, no, baby. It doesn’t hurt. It feels too good, actually.” There was something dark and promising within Zoro’s husky tone, and it sent pleasant trembles up your body. He sounded so wrecked, so fucked out, as if he was completely drowning in the sensation of your wet, sloppy pussy — and wasn’t that a wonderful thought?

“It feels g-good?” You whispered, wanting nothing more than to hear Zoro mutter those words again, to hear his verbal confirmation of how much your pussy was pleasing him, the desire so strong that it was nearly overpowering.

“So good, baby. Your pussy is sucking me in like it can’t get enough.” Zoro held no hesitation in responding, the tone of his voice slightly smug, as if he knew what his words were doing to you — and he probably did. Wet slaps and squelches ricocheted off the walls, your pussy practically screaming its approval of the abuse Zoro was hammering into it with his cock. Your moans were beginning to increase in volume; the pain had nearly completely dissipated, replaced by a satisfying sense of fullness and extreme pleasure. Zoro’s cock was able to hit every single good spot within your pussy, even the ones you had no idea existed; and the gentle bumps of his tip against your cervix were driving you absolutely delirious.

“It feels good f-for me, too.” You punched out between harsh thrusts, though part of you felt the verbal confirmation was unneeded; your moans were evidence enough, as was the increasing fluttering and tightening of your walls around his cock — the drag and slide of his cock was sloppy, aided by the slick your connection was pulling from your pussy. But it seemed as though Zoro appreciated the verbalization anyway, as his cock throbbed within your cunt, and a deep groan fell from his lips.

“Yeah? You like how my cock fills your pussy up?” Zoro murmured hotly, lips tracing down your cheek, your jaw, then attaching themselves to your neck, peppering it with wet, open mouthed kisses. Zoro’s words, thrusts, and attentions pulled a whiny moan from your throat, and you nodded vigorously. Slick gushed around the girth of his cock as his words went straight to your gut, pulling on the strings of that coil and tightening it.

“Fuck, yeah, you like it when I talk like that.” Zoro growled into your skin, the phrase not even a question, but you nodded your confirmation anyway. You really did like it, the way those words and filthy mutterings fell syrupy from his lips, the things they did to your body, the way they intensified the pleasure.

Zoro’s hips were moving at an inhuman speed now, drilling his cock ever faster inside your slick, sloppy cunt, and the sensation was absolutely mind blowing. Your orgasm was building quickly in your gut, effectively melting all coherency from your brain, reducing you to nothing but a moaning, trembling, drooling mess beneath Zoro.

“God, look at you baby. My cock is drivin’ you absolutely fuckin’ dumb. Shit, it feels like I’m corruptin’ you.”

Zoro’s voice was no more than a husky growl, words slurred and punctuated by harsh, pointed thrusts into your pussy, which squelched and twitched with every slide of his thick cock. It felt so fucking good, he was fucking you so good, so fast and hard, you were breaking —

“You’re gonna fuckin’ cum soon, aren’t you, baby? Do it. Fuckin’ do it on my cock, baby.”

You could only answer Zoro with a symphony of wanton moans, your legs tightening around his waist as he drove you into euphoria with his cock, so thick and long, hitting you in all the right places, rearranging your insides and driving you insane. His words were like hot brands in your ear, shooting fire straight through your veins and heating you from the inside out; you were close now, tip toeing on that precipice of complete, consuming pleasure.

“Z-Zoro, please,” you choked out, toes curling and back arching as his cock relentlessly abused your walls, your gut clenching from the build-up of pleasure. You let out a surprised squeal when Zoro’s teeth nicked the sensitive flesh of your neck; it was no more than a fleeting graze of his incisors, but when it was combined with his harsh thrusts and commanding sexual aura, it was nearly too much.

“‘Please’ what, baby? You want me to make you cum? Then beg me.” Zoro’s voice was blanketed with dark lust, commanding and so, so alluring – but frustration nipped at your body when Zoro’s hips slowed, driving his cock fully into you with each thrust, but not giving you anywhere near the pleasure or friction you needed for that coil to snap. Your orgasm receded like waves returning to the ocean, and you whimpered out in frustration.

“D-don’t stop, Zoro.” You pleaded, hands falling from his nape to scratch down the skin of his shoulder blades, pulling a hiss from his lips. His hips continued to simply grind slowly into you, and as if retaliating against you, he stopped thrusting completely, and his cock remained buried with your cunt as he rocked his hips forward. It felt amazing, but it wasn’t enough — not enough to send you over that brink. You needed Zoro to pound into you, to drive his thick cock into your sloppy cunt at inhuman velocity, to use you and break you and ruin you.

“Ask nicely, baby. Use your words, and beg me to make you cum.”

Something sharp and hot speared through your gut, and the authority in his words brought a rolling fog into your brain, and before you could comprehend anything you were digging your nails into his flesh and complying to his order.

“P-please, Zoro. Please, I need it. Please make me cum, sir. Please, I’ll be so good—”

“Shit,” Zoro muttered darkly, lifting his hand from your hip and sliding it beneath your head to bring your head up and bury it into the crook of his neck. His other arm slid into the space that your head had previously occupied on the pallet and his hips shifted, as if he were stabilizing himself.

“Hold on to me baby, I’m not stopping ‘til you cum all over my cock.” Zoro growled, shooting anticipation straight through your muscles and brain.

“Yes, yes, please—” you chanted, voice suddenly cut off by a loud moan when Zoro pulled all the way out, until only his tip remained inside your sopping walls, and then drove forward with a heavy thrust that sent your whole body jolting forward from the impact. Pain and pleasure bloomed across your abdomen as his tip roughly battered your swollen cervix; but Zoro didn’t give you any time to recover, as he repeated the same thrust over and over again at a rapid fire pace.

The flesh of your thighs stung from the harsh impact of his hips against them, and the harmony of slapping skin, squelching, moaning and grunts filled the bubble of heat around your bodies. Pleasure was building so fast within your gut that it was dizzying, your body approaching that high far quicker than you were fully prepared for. Each slide of Zoro’s thick cock within you brought stars to your vision, and your fingers scrabbled desperately along the skin of his back as you lost yourself in the sensation.

“Oh, fuck, fuck, yes, feels so good — d-don’t stop, please don’t stop, fuck me—” Zoro was panting heavily now, his own hips shaking and body dripping sweat, the physical exertion of fucking you into oblivion beginning to weigh on his muscles; but Zoro didn’t stop, nor did his pace falter, hips continuing to drill into you within inhuman speed, and before you could so much as give a verbal warning of your orgasm, it was crashing over you with the force of a tsunami.

“Cumming—” you gasped into Zoro’s neck, fingernails digging crescents into his shoulder blades as your entire body shook, waves of pleasure wrecking every nerve ending beneath your skin. Your cunt fluttered and twitched around Zoro’s cock as he continued to drive it into you, fucking you straight through your high as it crashed against you and slowly tapered out.

“That’s it, baby, so fuckin’ good. Good girl, such a fuckin’ good girl.” Zoro growled heavily, and you squealed when his thrusts grew harsher, fucking into your body at a rhythm that was far more feral than the previous. Your cunt squeezed tightly around him as the pleasure became far too intense, now bordering on painful. You whimpered into Zoro’s skin, which resulted in him shushing you.

“I know baby, fuck. Just bear with it a little longer — I’m so close now.”

You nodded and clutched at Zoro’s undulating body harder, taking deep breaths through your nose as your body was wracked with overstimulation with every thrust. Zoro’s balls slapped heavily against your ass as he pounded into you relentlessly, driving slick and wet squelches from your ruined pussy.

“Almost, fuck, almost. Gonna cum soon.” Zoro panted, hips stuttering and faltering, his cock twitching heavily against your walls, the sensation setting your nerves alight with anticipation. You wanted Zoro to cum, you wanted him to pump it into your pussy and fuck it deeper inside, until it was completely absorbed by your pliant body. You wanted him to mark you as his forever.

“Yes, yes, Zoro — cum in me, fill me up, please—”

“Fuck, here it comes — take all of it.” Zoro growled, thrusts momentarily growing even faster before the man above you stilled and released a guttural groan as his cock hardened inside you, twitching, throbbing, and you whimpered at the extreme heat that bloomed inside your walls in the next instant. That was Zoro’s cum, he was filling you up with it, fucking it back inside with short, hasty thrusts as he rode out his orgasm.

After what seemed like a lifetime of Zoro pumping hot cum inside your body he completely stilled, body trembling against yours ever so slightly as he sucked in lungfuls of air. You did the same, your pussy still twitching and throbbing from the aftermath of your own orgasm, milking out every last drop from Zoro’s softening cock.

“Fuck.” Zoro said with a dry chuckle, and you nodded with a slow-forming smile. Though he’d only said one word, you knew exactly what he was talking about; and you shared the sentiment wholly.

“That was amazing.” You whispered, dragging your lips affectionately across the sweaty skin of his shoulder. Zoro’s fingers scratched at your scalp and his chest vibrated against yours when he hummed.

“Yeah, it was. I can’t believe you let me take your virginity.”

“Why is that so hard to believe?” You asked quizzically, treading your fingertips over his shoulder blade with a featherlight touch.

“Dunno. Just never thought you’d want me to take it.” Zoro said with a subtle shrug, and you swallowed down a whimper when Zoro slowly pulled his cock out of you. It popped out with an embarrassing squelch, and you shivered as hot fluid dripped from your pussy to the sheets — they’d need to be thoroughly washed.

“Shit, we made a mess.” Zoro murmured as he guided your head back down to rest on the sheets, and you let out a breathy giggle.

“It’s fine. I like the mess.” You wisped, sending Zoro a lopsided, tired grin, which he returned. “Now get down here and hold me. I wanna cuddle.”

Zoro shook his head lightly at your antics but followed your command, rearranging himself until he was planted beside you. You habitually turned on your side and allowed Zoro to circle your waist with one of his arms, pulling you back until your backside was flush with his front. Your all-time favorite cuddle position.

Fatigue was hitting you like a raging bull, and you couldn’t stop your lips from splitting into a yawn or your eyelids from slipping close. Zoro planted a chaste, sweet kiss to the skin of your neck and whispered,

“Goodnight, baby.”

You twisted your head until you could reach his lips with your own, and you captured them into a slow, loving kiss. It lacked any heated or sensual passion, but it was full of tender love and adoration. Afterglow was amazing, you mused. You were happy, content, your body so satisfyingly achy and exhausted, and you couldn’t imagine being anywhere else at the moment.

Before you could fully drift off to sleep, you murmured, “of course I gave you my virginity. I love you more than anything.”

Slumber claimed before you could register Zoro’s response, but even in your sleep there was no mistaking the sentiment behind the way Zoro’s arm curled ever tighter around your stomach.

{{:================================:}}

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[holylulusworld]

TOL - I’m your daddy now (1) - Lloyd Hansen

Summary: You reached the end of the rope.

Pairing: Lloyd Hansen x Singlemom!Reader

Warnings: plus-sized reader, needy Lloyd, Lloyd being Lloyd, Lloyd is an ass and boob enthusiast, mentions of sex for money, money trouble, mentions of cheating (her ex), groping, slight mommy kink (kinda, it's Lloyd)

A/N: This is part of my Traders of love (lust) masterlist series. It's the prequel to TOL - Like a virgin (Bucky Barnes) and tells the story about Lloyd and his assistant sunshine.

You reached the end of the rope. 

With your three-year-old little boy depending on you, it’s not easy to face reality. In two weeks, you will have to leave your home. The bank will take the house, and even the wreck of a car you call your own.

Your deadbeat of a husband left you with nothing but debs and resentment for men. He’s out and about with a younger, prettier, and slimmer girl. – His words, not yours.

While you tried to save your marriage, he fucked some woman he met at a bar behind your back. You knew he was a sleazy and worthless bastard, but never expected him to turn his back on his son too.

It’s not that you didn’t try anything to make enough money to pay for the mortgage and feed your son. One too many nights you went to bed hungry, only lukewarm water in your belly to at least save enough money to buy food for your baby boy.

“Mommy,” your little boy yawns as he looks up at you. He holds out his chubby hands, whining because you don’t pick him up. You just look at him for a moment, feeling your heart chatter all over again.

“How could I ever fall for your father,” you sniffle when you pick your son up. You peck his cheek and sigh. “At least he gave me you. The only good thing coming out of this relationship.”

You nuzzle his cheek and try to ignore the ache in your chest, and your growling stomach. At least you got paid yesterday. It’s not enough to keep the house for another month, but you can get food on the table.

Whatever happens tomorrow, you don’t know. The website you found promised help in hopeless situations. You never know with the internet, but it’s your last resort.

If they don’t keep their promises, you’ll end up on the street with your son only because your husband ran off with all of your savings. He even stole the money your grandmother left you for desperate times.

“Hi, uh-I’m Y/N Y/L/N. I have an appointment,” you wring your hands while looking around the lobby of the building inheriting the company promising to save your home. The woman at the reception doesn’t even look your way. She huffs and lifts her perfectly manicured index finger to stop you from talking.

“I don’t think you are what we are looking for,” she snaps at you, and your heart sinks. You look down at your body, sighing deeply. The business outfit you are wearing is a tight fit. You gained weight during pregnancy you never got the chance to lose. “You should go home and bake cookies for your kid.”

She points her finger at the stain on your blouse, simply to embarrass you even more. Some women are like that. They try to feel better, or above you by making you feel small.

“Kiki, that is enough,” you flinch when a hand brushes over your ass. The man pats your cheeks, humming happily. “What do we have here?” He purrs and gropes one cheek. “A perfect plump ass.”

“Mr. Hansen, Sir,” the woman splutters. She looks like she saw a ghost, or worse, a monster wanting to eat her alive. “I told her that she doesn’t belong here.”

“Kiki, Kiki,” Hansen tuts while patting your ass. “I decide who belongs here.”

You don’t know what to do. Usually, you’d slap any guy trying to feel you up across the face or kick their balls. But this man could be your way out of your financial crisis. 

“Yes, of course, Mr. Hansen but just look at her,” she squeaks, and points at you. “I don’t think any of our clients want something like this to fulfill their…”

“ENOUGH!” Hansen slams his fist onto the receptionist's desk, making Kiki flinch. “We never talk about our clients nor our employees in front of people outside of our organization. You are dismissed.”

“What?” She stares at Hansen in disbelief. “For today or…”

“Forever,” he huffs and turns around. The man brushes his index finger and thumb over his mustache and grins like he saw something he’d love to devour. You are afraid it’s you.

“I have an appointment,” you clear your throat and try to ignore your heart hammers in your chest. This man looks more like a wolf, with sharp teeth and glowing eyes, than a man. 

“I know, sunshine,” he smirks and holds out his hand. “Please excuse my annoying assistant. She’s no longer working for me.”

You’d love to roll your eyes at the man in front of you. He’s one of the guys who believe you must immediately fall for his charm and non-existent manners. 

“If you’d like to follow me inside my office, sugar plum,” he wraps his arm around your shoulders, and snickers, "we can talk about your problems and how to solve them.”

“So…” He plops down on a leather couch. He pats the seat next to him, but you prefer standing in the room. “What brings you here, sunshine. How can Lloyd help you?”

“I found your website while searching for a way to keep my house,” you lick your lips. You hate that you must talk about your situation with this man. 

“Humor me,” he smirks and pats the seat again. “If you want me to help you, I want to know it all. From the beginning.”

He tilts his head and looks you up and down. “What do you want to know?” You huff and cross your arms over your chest. “I came here, even though your offer sounded fishy. I reached the end of the rope.” You throw your hands up, and sniffle.

“Now, now. No tears in Lloyd Hansen’s office,” he gets up to march toward you. Lloyd cups your face and tilts your head. “I need to know every detail, sunshine. If you are lying, I’ll send you home with a slap to your plump ass.”

“Fine,” you snap at him and push against his chest. “Quit pro quo, Mr. Hansen. After I told you everything about my situation, I want the truth about your offer.”

“Be my guest,” he smirks darkly. “I hope you don’t pee your pants getting to know the truth.”

“I came this far,” you sniff, “you don’t scare me, Mr. Hansen. You’re not the first man wanting me to fail.” 

“A cocky one, I see,” Lloyd says as he sits back down on the sofa. “Begin, then.”

“What do you want to know? That my deadbeat of a husband left me for some bitch he met at a bar?” You drop your bag onto his desk and take your jacket off. “Or that I must raise my three-year-old son without him because his dick was more important?”

You stride toward Lloyd and step between his legs. He looks up at you, amused as you cup your tits. “I will lose my house and my car. I don’t make enough money to keep the house. He stole the money I spared to give her a nice life.”

“I see,” he licks his lips. “I think you already got what I have to offer.” Lloyd tilts his head and smirks as you start to unbutton your blouse.

“You want me to fuck you, right? That’s all this is about,” you wrinkle your nose. “And I’ll get the money I need to keep my house.”

He grins now. “Sunshine, you didn’t get that this is about business. I’ll put you on my website and my clients can decide if they want to fuck you or not.”

“Oh…” You sigh deeply. “I guess this means there is no hope.” You turn around to grab your bag. “Sorry for wasting your time.”

“Sunshine, wait,” he’s on his feet before you can grab your jacket. “I didn’t say you can just leave. Don’t you want to end up getting fucked good by my clients?”

“Do you honestly believe I was waiting to get fucked by random douches,” you turn back around and slap Lloyd with your bag. “I came here to find help, not dick.”

His grin widens as you slap his chest, face, and shoulder with your bag. “Careful, sunshine. If you don’t watch out, you’ll end up making me rock hard.”

“You’re disgusting,” you wrinkle your nose and cock a brow. 

“Oh, mommy can get mad,” he purrs and roams your body with his eyes. “I bet you are a strict mommy, huh? Do you scold your baby boy?”

“No!” You snap at Lloyd. “Keep my son out of this!” You slap him with your bag again. “Never mention my kid again, you asshole!”

“I knew you were special, sunshine,” he chuckles and grabs your wrist to keep you from slapping him again. “A wildcat ready to scratch and bite me.”

“I’m a tiger mommy if you want to know,” you growl and snap your teeth at Lloyd when he tries to press his lips to yours. “I’ll do anything to protect my son.”

“Sunshine, you’ve got yourself a deal,” Lloyd drops his hands from your arms to grab your face again. This time he kisses you roughly. You bite his lower lip, but he doesn’t seem to mind. He greedily shoves his tongue inside your mouth, devouring your mouth. “I think you’ll make a grand-prime assistant slash sexy bunny for me…”

Part 2

[shouyuus]

caleidoscope tears with someone from bnha?

kaleidoscope tears

todoroki touya; 537 words; fluff and angst, hurt/comfort, villain!reader, vague allusions to blood/death but not even rly, mostly just kissing, but sad!kissing lmfao

summary: there's nothing more lovely than watching a monster become undone with wanting.

a/n: idk man, kinda angsty, kinda unexplained, mostly just here for the kissing!dabi vibes.

─── 燈矢 THERE’S NOTHING MORE LOVELY than watching a monster become undone with wanting. and what are men if not monsters, deep inside. every single one of them — you think, as touya sinks to his knees, his fingers digging into the soft flesh of your thighs, his chin pillowed on the soft of your lower belly, his eyes up-cast at you, filled with so much light, so much dull, pulsing desire, so much the wish of salvation, however tainted and skewed it might be.

“please,” he says, his voice cracked, his skin hot to the touch. you lick our lips and trace delicate thumbs along the stitches that run up the sides of his face, bisecting his cheeks. and you think to yourself that dr. frankenstein himself couldn’t have imagined a more pitiable monster if he tried.

“let me kiss you,” he says, and you sigh, letting him drag you down. he kisses you like drowning, like a man searching for meaning in a vast, careless universe, cast out to sea by a family he’d fought tooth and nail to call his own, but at the end of the day, couldn’t find the words to call them his. he kisses you like you are the ocean, and him ship full of lost treasure, as if he might be able to pour everything worthwhile into you, bury it in your chest for safe-keeping if he just kissed you hard enough —

“touya — wait —” you say, but he shakes his head, sinks his fingers into your hair and drags you back towards him. you can’t breathe, but you let him kiss you anyway.

once, someone had told you might one day let a man reach for you when he might be trying to reach for something else instead — only mistaking you for whatever it might be in the wane, dying light — like a drink, or a lifeboat, or a medal, or a snack. once, someone had told you that you are all, and none of those things. but when touya pulls back, you try to search his eyes for the reflection of you, and you find it — there, just there, hidden amidst all the smoke, the images of your own face, reflected back at you, looking every bit as broken as he felt.

“we’re — we’re the same, aren’t we?” he asks, his voice cracking over the syllables. you swallow, feeling the saltwater prickle at the back of your throat, familiar pinch at the corners of your eyes. you lick your lips and taste the sharp tang of blood on your tongue.

he laughs as he drags a thumb along the corner of your mouth; his finger comes away red.

“god, you’re so beautiful like this.”

you lean forward to press your forehead to his, feel the scalding heat of his skin, the way his rough skin drags against yours like a reminder, or a warning.

his breath smells like smoke.

“kiss me,” you say, you beg, letting your fingers dig into the scarred skin of his neck.

he shrugs, licking his own lips as he watches you.

“might hurt.”

you let out a soft, watery laugh.

“yeah, well. kiss me anyway.”

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