#to be clear i dont mind the first one
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Idk if it’s something in the air or what, but out of three appointments I had at work today, one of them rescheduled, one of them showed up late, and one just straight up no showed :)
#to be clear i dont mind the first one#the second one is annoying but i get it stuff happens#the third one??? at least have the decency to not just ghost me holy fuck#its particularly annoying because SHE set the time and date!!! she said it would work and i CONFIRMED that i would talk to her at that time#so idk whats going on but im kinda fed up#emubops life
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Arcane s2 talk
Ignoring everything that happens in episode 3 except the kiss is my way of coping until next week. Then I can guarantee you my coping mechanism next week will just be being in love with Vi, call it delusional, I call it smart
#arcane#arcane league of legends#arcane lol#vi arcane#vi#arcane season 2#arcane s2#arcane season 2 act 1#arcane season 2 spoilers#im not coping#but i have the gays#id also like to clarify because sometimes i feel a bit dodgy#yes i am a transmac but i also fit within the sort of non binary area kind of i just dont use the term non binary#id like to clarify that my personal experience with my attraction to women is not straight but very much queer#idk why i want to clear that up but like i know how much of an issue fetishisation is for the lgbtq community#and i just wanted to clear up that how i feel is very gay not just “ooh two women how hot”#like#you feel me?#okay this is being tagged with#remus rambles#because what was the relevance of that whole rant#im fairly certain no one was bothered in the first place but its put my mind at ease to get it out there
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reminder that if you're not watching Crayon Shin-chan then you are living a hollow and empty life. this is not edited. this ripped straight from the movie (Movie 8: Jungle That Invites the Storm, highly recommend for fellow Masaaki Yuasa lovers)
if you need further convincing: these monkeys run an animation sweatshop
#i've made this disclaimer on another post but will again since i've seen a lot more of the movies now#the movies are VERY good and very enjoyable but unfortunately the first handful are bogged down by transphobic/homophobic/okama stereotypes#they kind of vary in their severity. Movie 5 i think is the biggest catalyst because it features the stereotyped characters the most#prominently. Movie 3 doesnt really have caricatures per se but saves a very backhanded reveal for the end#Movies 1 and 4 are a bit more tolerable if my memory is correct. Movie 2 i think is kind of comparable to Movie 5 with its caricatures#in that the characters have similar roles in both movies#i admittedly can't remember what caricatures there were in Movie 6 or 7. 7 i think barely had anything#RAMBLE RAMBLE BASICALLY: these jokes are within the first 7 movies or so 5 being the zenith then reducing down and down. by movie 8 it's sa#e#i give these disclaimers because these movies are all very enjoyable and i would not recommend them if i didnt think there wasnt any merit#o them. they are all very much worth watching. Movie 5 still has a lot of very enjoyable stuff in it (there's a showdown in a supermarket!!#but i just want to make sure that is clear and established since transparency is good to have and i dont want anyone's viewing experience t#be ruined because they weren't given the proper warning#if it's any consolation it's my understanding that even the directors hated doing the jokes#iirc Keiichi Hara really didn't like doing the jokes and i think had a talk with the mangaka Yoshito Usui and was like 'uh dude this is#gonna age horribly can we maybe not'#ironically Hara's first film is Movie 5. which is again the biggest offender#BUT! that is my spiel. my understanding is that it's contained to those 6 or 7 first movies and i think is strictly just a movie thing#so please do give these films a watch but just be mindful at the same time#if anyone needs recommendations my favorites have been movies 4 and 9 but i genuinely really enjoyed every one that i have seen#i've seen the first 11 and a half movies (need to finish 12) and movie 22. the worst i've felt about one is 'oh that was pretty good!'#each film has its own merit and is very very very much worth watching#22 was the first Shin-chan anything i watched and all my Shin-chan expert friends say 4 is a good introductory piece#in case that influences anything/makes it easier to break in#so. thus concludes my spiel#csc#vid
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Prologue - Part 1
{And it begins. May the story of our humble beginnings strike awe into your wild-beating heart}
#thymoons#clangen#clangen comic#warrior cats#clan generator#thymeclan#hope you all enjoy :D#God I had so much fun drawing the reps of the groups#Also just to clear up potential confusion this is not a sparklecat clangen#all will make sense in time...#Also fun fact this was not originally the first page!#I lost motivation so fast for the initial first page so made this one#but this one has a whole different format so I have to scrap og page 1s work :')#also dont mind my shitty handwriting-#Its probably temporary until I make a nice font#probably
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sneeping with his legs up over his head for some reason... weird boye
#cats#love the second picture... skrungly sleepy well rested boye face...#since he's an elderly boy now sometimes when he wakes up from a nap he looks a bit scruffy and squinty eyed#Hard to beleive he's like 15 though.. he still looks like a kitten to me.. due to his giant round creature eyes and childlike demeanor#I think it's interesting that like... baby cats are babies. kittens are kittens. and you can tell a cat is like 'young adult' phase#looking from like a few months to maybe 1yr or 2yrs.. but after that they just always look the same to me#a 5 yr old cat is a 10 yr old cat is a 15 year old cat. unless the cat in question is particulalry aged or youthful#I still have so so little energy... it's been icy here this week. like not even FUN but just scary icy even thoguh i lOOOVE the cold#and its my favorite weather. I think it'd be okay actually if I had a woodburning stove/fireplace/hearth thing. literally thats my only#concern with the power going out. I genuinely don't mind stuff like having to go to the bathroom in buckets or cook over a fire or do other#less conveninet things. Its just that if eveyrhtng is electric then you have no way to cook and all of that. well.. and I literally need#background noise to go to sleep lest my ocd sprials become so loud I am slowly driven into maddness.. but a few battery packs or something#and a phone with one downloaded video I could play on repeat is fine for that. I dont need internet. ANYWAY.. so so sad that my fav#orite season ever (winter) is here. and the first cold of the winter is like... just an ice storm that you cant even walk in. I#love like 4 feet of snow where you can play in it and stuff. But just a thin flat sheet of a few inches of ice over every imaginable surfac#is not really playable. the wind speeds are so high and so many trees fall it's actually not that safe to go hang out outside anyway unless#you were in a totally clear open field. which is SAD also because i love ice and high winds. i love to stand out there and get whipped in t#he face with ice crystals and feel like I'm in some dramatic movie or something. but alas.. the threat of being attacked by a falling tree.#I did go out some but again it's like. literallyyou cant walk on it. so I just squatted and dragged myself along the ground lol#One of my stories has a whole section where the main characters are trapped in a deadly cold environment for a week and have to use magic#to survive and etc. etc. so I'm always like.. ouuu.. I should go in the ice.. it's Writing Research actually.. *foolishly gets frostbite*#THOUGH yesterday I went on a harrowing evil journey down a bunch of icy hilly roads to go check on some person's cat because the cat#had been left in the house for like 5 days at that point with nobody to check on them and nobody else seemed to want to do anything#about it (like call all of the neighbors or try to get someone out there) so I just went myself with a roommate who agreed to drive me.#It seemed acting totally normal and I gave it more food and water but.. I am still worried about it.. Apparently the person will be able#to get back to their house tomorrow but.. I dont trust them. But I couldnt take the cat with me because it's like.. a stranger's cat#basically and also no carrier + very skittish.. so I feared if I just tried to carry them bare handed they'd definitely leap from my grasp#and then it'd be like.. sliding on a sheet of ice chasing a cat and so on.. I still think they need to be watched for health issues tho >:|#ANYWAY.... many cat adventures lately... and strange weather... I wish for a normal week without always so many Things Happening.. augh
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Can we talk about the fact that canonically Thalia thinks Apollo is hot? Like can we? I feel like it's not being discussed enough.
#Theres at least one thing Percy and Thalia can agree on: Apollo is hot.#idk what i even hc her sexuality or romantic preference to be i just find this hilarious for so many reasons#we're ignoring the fact that Apollo is her brother#id also like to make it very clear. i dont ship them at all. like never even crossed my mind i just find this fact funny#thalia grace#percy jackson#apollo pjo#percy jackson and the olympians#if your wondering its a scene in the Titans curse when they first meet Apollo. Thalia calls him hot and Percys a lovable idiot about it
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i know that when carlo suddenly decided that he needs to marry guy made a whole list in his head n like had a deadlines n shit. like it was some kind of a task he needed to do
#whole fkin campaign. idk still not sure how it was but man was in his peacock era for sure#n it's like i need to find a wife i need to make it in 2 (or whatever) months etc etc#but its like a bg task n he didn't speak bout it w others. like he just said that he needs to marry#also idk if i mentioned this but i wrote lauretta/carlo first meet long ago n she was w her fiance#i just listened to “pretty music” again sorry. i like that uh governor or tf this character is#changes his behaviour from one woman to another so real. n that fkin “but im a lucky guy who gets to dance w u”#and “since u know what i need i'll even take your lead” <- fr like im sure lauretta screwed him for several times#just to see if he's really serious good old manipulations w men nothing new nothing superstitious#upd. he probably made a mind budget for this (i mean finding a wife)#n bout lauretta screwing carlo its like in this ukranian song Ти ж мене пiдманула ти ж мене пiдв��ла#but since he's a strategist he's patient (like i wanted to accent this quality sm i wrote#that carlo started thinkin bout taking moretti's place back in 1932)#anyway. “Challenge accepted” situation and idk fr for some reason when it's carlo eddie lauretta it's always bout playing#so lauretta started playing n he entered this play too. i don't even think he was exactly mad (maybe only for the 1st time)#at this point i have a clear image of how they met n their first dates (cringe word) n how he proposed#ie how it started how it ended. ending was fast i believe (deadline is approaching 🤯)#what was in between i don't exactly know but i wondered just now if he also screwed lauretta (i think yes)#bc i don't knooowwww frrr all this is so bout playing to me#but bout ending its like. boss fight (<- sex) game credits (<- marriage) ((speedrun))#also i was thinkin if he even ever met lauretta's parents (i always thought that no but idk)#can imagine lauretta calling carlo a good friend. i also hm ok#i started to write a comic like a month ago just bout falcone polycule n it starts w#carlo who says that he finally needs to get married n lauretta's mother askin (in a pushing way) why#her n her fiance still aren't married like girl tf. she jinxed it i guess#upd. carlo/lauretta is funny in my head bc right before marriage he did fell in love lauretta didn't but guy's profitable we'll take him👍#she did only after marriage i think bc it was the time when u can finally relief bc it's over#u don't need to think bout no yes no no yes yes will it work or won't etc#woman was able to fucking chill at last. she got the money sorry i mean the man#he's not runnin away let's finally look who the fuck is even this man. why he won't shut up bout astronomy can i get a divorce <- jk#but yeah “я тобi брехала” is so lauretta right after marriage to me (“i dont even know the color of ur hair”)
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they werent lying that knuckles series barely has knuckles in it
#i pirated that shit Btw just so we're clear. also gonna talk about it a little bit in the tags#nothing too spoilery but also might not wanna read if you want to go in knowing absolutely nothing? idk#anyway he WAS a main character still he was present for a decent amount of the first couple episodes#but the amount of screentime he gets just starts dropping after that . hes barely there at all in the second half ???#and it feels like theres a lot of scenes mostly focusing on wade and his problems and not near as many for knuckles and his whole deal#overall it feels more like a wade show with knuckles in it than a knuckles show with wade in it. which sucks#and human characters having plot relevance isnt the problem here i dont mind human characters at all i think they can be really fun#its the fact that the human characters are taking over the story and spotlight when the show is called knuckles#and all the marketing makes it look like knuckles is the main focus#and i also would have preferred if they just went with a differnet character to be knuckles' human friend#because i dont particulraly care about wade. and the knuckles (and sonic and tails) i know would not be friends with cops </3#well at least the story wasnt knuckles training wade to be a better cop like a lot of people were expecting but thats like.the bare minimum#also aside from the issues relating to knuckles' screentime (or lack of screentime) i thought the ending was unsatisfying#regardless of all that though there WERE some parts i enjoyed or found kind of funny or whatever. because knuckles so cutesy as always#knuckles being a cute little guy is the most important part of the show actually#and i liked the parts with sonic tails and maddie even if they were only there for like 5 minutes#(i really wish those three had gotten more screentime. i feel like they could have easily worked in at least one more scene with them)#and its a minor thing but the opening sequence is cute. was honestly expecting just a title card or something#overall the show is just . kind of okay i guess. not the worst thing ive ever seen but still disappointing ? idk how to explain..#my expectations also werent very high in the first place#so maybe im being a bit more generous than i would have been otherwise. idk#and i definitely would not recommend this to anyone who already dislikes the sonic movies . youll probably hate this more#like people who thought the human characters got too much screentime in the second movie would lose their minds if they saw this
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fingers crossed but it looks like i'm starting to stabilize. i had a relatively normal day yesterday, and while i still had more drastic mood swings than i would have at baseline, i wasn't overly manic and i also didn't feel suicidal when going to bed so i was able to fall asleep pretty quickly and without music at full volume in my headphones. i woke up naturally this morning around 8am instead of 4am or sleeping until someone wakes me up to tell me it's already noon and i feel pretty rested and able to focus. i'm almost caught up on my quantitative reasoning homework assignments and i'll be back up to being ahead of the class content wise.
i see my psychiatrist in a week so i'm going to keep monitoring it and let the new dosage adjust to my system but maybe, just maybe, my bipolar 1 is starting to recede!
#knock on wood and all that stuff#but it's the first day in two months where i just feel like a normal person#i really hope im over the hump on this one#spending two and a half months in fight or flight has absolutely destroyed my nervous system and general body functioning#it has made my chronic pain so bad i feel weak i can't eat solid foods properly like im wasting away because my body can't handle#such rapid changes all the time#but i feel okay today#i also have an idea for my next tattoo that i'll get in a few months once i move out#ive been really attached to the song summertime by my chemical romance through this whole crisis#and theres a line that says 'you can write this on your arm'#and im gonna take that literally#and get 'in the dark' on one arm and 'out of harm' on the other near my elbows#gerard way stopped me from kms many times and its a crime i dont have an mcr tattoo yet tbh#ive wanted one for so long#but now i know exactly what i want#its such a clear image in my mind#anyway im done rambling#ghost.txt#suicidal ideation#<- i mentioned it so im tagging
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the nice thing about living at work being offline for chunks at a time is the people u used to really dislike seeing on the dash (by no one's fault, promise), it doesn't really bother you anymore when you see them pop up as recs or smth. like. neat. lol. it's nice! it's comforting. i feel like I've def moved on from things, its liberating.
#◟ ⋆ㅤㅤif my hair's a mess﹐my mind's a mess.ㅤ( ooc )#to delete *#still on brainrot about this crush or whatever it is#decided to be upfront with her lol donnnnt have the highest hopes but#as someone who likes transparency and directness -- i feel its right.#and if not! im 100% ok with it too like its not my first time#i am v clumsy w this tho bc i don't usually tell people lol if im even Remotely interested. so.#she's branching out for'shore.#also confided in my brow girl who's also a lesbian and she was like 'girl ask her. that'd make it clear like whenever ur in the area'#she's absolutely right. so. there's that. thank god i have one lesbian person irl who i can talk to about this shit#she wanted to have me do gay clubs that she knows of. women only. sounds fun! but. nah. work keeps me :')#she's a teacher :') a professor technically. i feel so stupid LFKASJFA#i dont think im dumb! by any stretch! but. the fact she teaches (art) and is tech a teacher im like god akjfsha#how do i talk wtf akjfsa i can sound Smart totally oh def (help)
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Chris lofi studio literally lives his life everyday not knowing how he forever changed my life for the better when he made kenshi. I wish i could explain how much this game means to me in a way that matters
#lodia sayings#kenshi tag#again insane about this game and my kenshi ocs#i want to wipe my mind completely clear and play this game again for the first time but tbh the lifespan of this game is infinite.#you cant get bored of it (or if you can neuroatypicality issue)#but tbh ive forgotten so much of the lore and i dont pay attention to a lot of it anymore when i play which is sad.#i wanna play again like. as if i was playing for the first time and document everything.#i dont wanna read or listen to other ppls ideas on the lore etc the other time i listened to a video about it a guy made#he was like umm im somewhat an expert on kenshi lore then he misgendered Agnu.#i was playing kenshi and i found the broken ones again and they make me insane. *howls*#nobody ever thinks of the broken ones. lets make a post about it.#neurotypicality issue* you get it
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if an artist says their turnaround time is usually a week and that they should be done with your specific commission by the end of the week, then goes nearly three weeks without saying something, is it OK to ask them for an update on your commission? I'm a bit torn on whether I should wait a whole month
#as someone who takes comms myself if i were me i would have sent an update after being unable to finish it within my turnaround time#just to be like hey heres what ive got so far sorry that this isnt the turnaround time i said it would be in my comms listing#but also im NOT them so 🤷 idk. literally anything could have happened and maybe they cant even use their phone right now#i dont wanna send them an email (even the very politely worded one ive been drafting) bc i dont want to be rude like at all#but also this person didnt get back to me for over a month when i first reached out to commission them so#im starting to see that for the red flag it was#and not like. a sign that they just have so many commissions to do. because it doesnt take long to send an email that says#'sorry im a bit too busy with other comms right now to take yours/work on yours'#i wouldnt have been mad. i would have either waited to comm them or taken my business elsewhere#i also wanna be clear i dont mind long turnarund times ive waited literal months for a comm with no complaints#its just the fact that they promised to finished it (completely unprompted) and then havent... said ANYTHING for WEEKS that seems sus to me#its crossed my mind i may have been scammed since they havent shown me anything more than a sketch#edit: part of the im really regretting comming them is because ive already waited a month to even like finish the TAKING my comm process#since they randomly didnt email me back for weeks right as we were finalizing the details#like i waited a LONG time to even be like 'are you still taking my comm?' bc in my head i was like#'they must have other comms that they havent mentioned (totally valid btw) if i wait the queue will be clear'#and then... yea idk i just dont think that was the case if their turnaround time is actually a week#which is a really short turnaround time anyway imo theyre making it too hard on themself#(funnily enough i have the same turnaround time which is why i know it can be challenging to do it in a week but its also completely doable)#anyway back to the fact i probably got scammed. their 'sketch' though i didnt wamna say it looked VERY much like#they just traced my concept sketch#which 😰
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I've been thinking abt my critter dupes some more and it was all fun and games until I remembered that I made Mi-ma a beeta and hm. Whoops. Uh oh. (<- Considered the implications for more than 2 seconds)
#rat rambles#oni posting#it's not Too bad. shes fine. but hoo boy. the images my mind showed me were not fun.#it's ok she just needs to keep being the farmer cook that she is and gather stuff for her fellow dupes and itll all be fine#Id provide further context but then itd become too clear what Im talking abt so how abt I dont#its ok shes ok nothing bad happens to her shes just a bit quirky thats all#and even if things did go a lil wonky it wouldnt be irreversible just a bit of an issue for a bit#shes just a silly billy who's genetic makeup is a series of contradictions and anomalies#I also have it as a thing where most of the colony see her as like a baby sister since she was the first duplicant printed after quinn left#so the dupes who were already there were like oh shit there's a new one and quinn isn't here to help them adjust we have to do a good job#in their place and make sure she feels the security they helped us feel while we built this colony together#and meanwhile mi-ma was just sitting there having the joints of an 80 year old woman and the energy of a young and spry bee#some of the younger dupes in that colony actually dont like her much because they see her as kind of spoiled#liam and leira especially constantly give her gifts and let her do things she rly shouldn't do#they eventually get better abt it when it actually starts to threaten her physical well-being but it sort of starts to swing in the other#direction after a while with leira especially being rly obsessive with making sure shes not doing anything that could cause health issues#ada has some light beef with mi-ma but she starts to turn around on her a bit once she learns abt some of the stuff shes gone through#after a lil while they get to be bug buddies who are experiencing joy and whimsy together watching paint dry or smth idk
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Need someone to invent a machine that takes the ideas from my head and put them on paper for me when I'm in the shower or trying to fall asleep. I would get *so* much more writing done if my brilliant shower and pre-sleep inspirations were taken straight from the source.
#its insane how much a shower helps clear my mind and fills so many plot holes#'well just write them down when you get out ita not that hard' 🥴#yeah that works when im solving like a programming issue or whatever#but for some reason when it comes to writing all that beautiful and smooth prose just goes *poof* the second that shower goes off#like if i dont get it down the moment it hits when im in the shower than its basically gone for good#bed is almost the same#only difference there is that i can just roll over and grab a notebook or my computer if the inspiration hits that hard#like the entire first chunk of baby its cold outside and my smut fic where written cause i just couldnt get the ideas out of my head#so 3am writing session it was!#problem with that one is that well i kinda need the sleep if i want to show up to work in a vague semblance of awareness lol
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that was kinda underwhelming ngl. I really expected that either Dean would show up, or we’d meet the “Queen” (it feels so weird to not call her The Empress/The Condesce/Meenah). Neither of those things happened.... yknow I keep saying that if the writers were confident enough in their ability to convey themes that they didn’t spend 15 minutes of every episode looking directly into the camera to talk about generational trauma (...and then illustrate it just fine immediately after, might I add. they don’t need to explain it all. the themes come across just fine) we would have a LOT more time for actual plot and the story wouldn’t fucking crawl like this.
#spnwin spoilers#keep the themes for all i care just have some confidence that we can actually UNDERSTAND a theme and dont need to be told on repeat every ep#you're either making a good show or an add for therapy make up your mind#seriously what the fuck is going on in the writers' room I am still genuinely baffled at this#I've literally never seen a show with a target audience age above 8 that diverts this much of its time and energy#to explaining the already-perfectly-clear themes directly to the viewer#except steven universe and that one WAS blatantly about therapy first and monsters second#seriously i cant be the only one feeling like this show is moving at an unbearably slow speed right?#literally half of every episode is the exact same paragraph about therapy repeated directly to the camera#im not even mad abt the heavy therapy themeing here im mad because the WRITING SUCKS and the SHOW SUFFERS FOR IT
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PIERRE & NATASHA;;;;
#musings#but one thing i beg of you consider me your friend and if you ever need help or simply to open your heart to someone not now#but when your mind is clear think of me. pierre grew confused. dont speak to me like that i am not worth it! stop stop stop!#you have your whole life before you- before me? no all is over for me! all over?#if i were not myself but the brightest handsomest best man on earth and if i were free i would get down on knees this minute#and ask for your hand. and for your love. and for the first time in the many days i weep tears of gratitude
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