#threads - finding my way back to you
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I think I'm growing up alright. I'm gonna keep at it.
#i worry a lot#you know#i'm afraid of other people#i'm afraid of the future#but i know i can overcome#or at the very least#the worst that can happen is that everything falls apart and i die#which would solve a problem i was looking for solutions way back when#so no worries there#i want to be connected#i want to hold onto something real#i want to become something real#i having become real want to reach out to you#with my weak arms and this slender spider's thread to carry us#maybe i'm doomed to fail#i don't know#i won't find out till the end#and there's just one chance anyways#so whatever#i'll keep going#i hope i can become someone worth relying on#not just an amusement or someone to ogle (though i'm not averse)#but i want to make the world just a little bit nicer#for those of us who fear it too#hand in hand#but i have wings that can take me anywhere#so i know i'll reach that distant sky
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so for like, a decade plus, i've been searching for a youtube video i remember seeing back in 2007, and i've finally managed to make some headway:
good news: i've found it
bad news: it's lost media
#it's been bugging me for so long honestly#ive talked about it in my tags before but its basically the video that introduced me to roblox#it's probably a bit silly to have been searching for this video. but part of the reason ive been looking is to see how good my memory is#specifically memories from when i was 9 years old. and how those memories have aged given im 26 now#like id say my memory is pretty good. specifically remembering specific details from memories long ago#like that isn't to say they're perfect. like i'll get some details wrong. but i know the general idea of what i saw#but basically#it's basically some old roblox bloopers video that had their character in a baseball cap and lugia t-shirt#now for a few years i wasn't sure i was correct on this person wearing a lugia t-shirt#and so at some point i figured i had to give up looking for that specific detail#since literally no video i could find had these two details combined. id find characters with baseball caps but never with a lugia t-shirt#and by that point i was afraid i wouldn't be able to find this video. or worse. my memory was wrong and it was something i watched in 2008#but i knew it had to be uploaded before december 12th. 2007. because thats when i made my account#and the way i found it was going through 11 pages of a youtube search for ''lego videos''#i was specifically looking for new lego videos to watch. or find something that seemed more interesting than lego mario stop motion#and there was one video that stood out. which was some random roblox bloopers video. mixed in with a bunch of random lego videos#anyway. just today i was scrolling through twitters ''for you'' tab and happened upon a thread showing off lost roblox youtube thumbnails#and i was like ''well. can't hurt to see if theres anything in here that i recognize.''#and lo and behold. a roblox dude in a blue baseball cap and a lugia t-shirt. labeled as ''ROBLOX Bloopers!''#i could feel the anvil of my doubt free itself from my brain because i finally had proof of a video that lines up with my memory#thats not to say this is the exact video but 99% certain it's uploaded by the same person. like it could be roblox bloopers part 2#but anyway. the channel and the video(s) are lost and while im sad i can't watch it to confirm my memory#im happy to see that there's evidence that lines up with my memory of what i saw back then#for reference. it was uploaded by someone named 'Furzniak' at the time. and it was uploaded on July 21st. 2007
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@sisturn complains: “why are we going grave-robbing again?” abigail drifts to wendy’s side, her brow quirked, “aren’t there other places to get rare stuff? preferably without seeing a skeleton. those give me the heeby-jeebie—”
a small blue specter rises from a nearby headstone, making a pitiful wailing sound. abigail’s eyes narrow, and she immediately puts herself between wendy and the other ghost. the deceased twin moans irritably, swatting at him; the little spirit squeaks, retreating behind the headstone. he peeks out from behind it, looking between the twins with wide eyes. his gaze settles on wendy, and he gives a tiny whine — “scary! scary! help?” — while abigail still glowers at him, practically puffing herself up like an angry bird.
"Because the others at camp are too scared to get things from here..." Wendy illuminates, seeming as completely annoyed by the prospect of coming here as Abigail was. The last time they'd come here had felt so recent, and already the adults were out of gold? It felt preposterous in all honesty, to send a child out with the specters of the world. Wendy didn't mind going there at that point, finding herself at peace with all the doom and gloom around her. That didn't make it fair, however, and she felt a right to complain about it.
However, things change once the specter appears. Usually, the only times they would appear was if they were disturbed, or the full moon was present. Considering it was the middle of the day, that ruled out the latter, and she hadn't even begun digging up the graves yet. So, what was this one doing out?
With that in mind, Wendy also notices how small the ghost seems to be. She and Abigail were only ten, and yet the latter appeared the same size as the other ghosts, so the only thought that passed her mind was one that brought her great sadness. A smaller child than even she, forced into this world and unable to live through it. That poor child... No wonder it was awoken by their presence, such a restless soul must live behind those downtrodden eyes.
He wants help... Perhaps, from her annoyed sister who had every reason to be wary. The living sister was not, though. Such a small creature, he likely couldn't hurt a fly, could he? Much more frightened of them than they ever could be of him. So, she takes that first leap and turns to Abigail, hoping that her words would be enough to calm her down. "I know we don't often see creatures that are completely harmless, but I don't think there's anything we need to be worried about here..." She replies in her normal monotone, before she turns her attention fully to the little ghost.
"It's alright... I won't let Abigail hurt you, she just gets scared for me is all," Once that focus shifts, Wendy seems to be a lot softer in her toning, something that would be odd for anyone who knew her well. Maybe it was just the fact that the child was so young. Or maybe she felt pity for his situation. In any sense, her main priority was making sure the young one felt safe, even if there wasn't much he needed to worry about.
"It's awfully strange to see one like you without some sort of disturbance... Is there something that keeps you from your rest?" It was the least she could do, offering to help where she could. It didn't mean she would be able to do it, but at the very least she could hear him out. "I don't want you to think I can do anything, but the two of us will see what we can do to help..."
#useless and missing a piece {ic}#finding my way back to you {threads}#starving together {dst verse}#i want to be famous / they're watching us anyway (abigail | sisturn)#sisturn#sorry for assaulting ur eyes earlier take this as a sowwy#lol anyway#i'm so happy i get to write wendy being good with kiddos#it's something so overlooked and that's a crime
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(๑╥﹏╥)੭ ♡
#❛ㅤ𓆩✦𓆪ㅤ:ㅤooc﹔ㅤㅤ/ㅤㅤchaos and aether simpery.#tbd /#ive been really Really low on social energy and Motivation in general#not kinda like in a burnout way! but close-ish#so i wanted to apologise for the time i take in getting back to messages / servers / threads#but also kinda like#appreciate how patient and understanding you all are with me ;;;;;;#i know a lot of us suffer from anxiety / depression / issues in general and i find it amazing how we're all trying our best#despite adversities and what comes our ways#i have this cyclical issue of burnout happening over and over and i dont remember my last genuine vacation#so it means a lot that i have friends and partners that can like! understand and wait for me ;;;;;;#it genuinely means a lot to me!!! makes me feel like i belong somewhere#despite its issues the genpact rpc was the one that im having the most fun in. and the one i feel like people understand#so thanks for being so lovely with me!!!#I'll slowly get back to DMs / threads / asks etc <333#just need to die a lil beforehand sksmflgmg kokomi is just like me frfr#vent /#just in case!
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thinking abt sett and cannibalism as a metaphor for love
#Get a load of this guy - OOC;#im in my thinking man pose....#i talk a lot abt how sett's idea of love is a little skewed in mainverse since he's so up his own ass#and if he finds that partner willing to put up with his ass and break apart his horrible outer shell#or worm their way hardcore into his side#he'll eventually break right#because like whatever he can lay with whoever he wants but he doesnt necessarily love someone because of that? they just fuck#oh but when he's IN LOVE.... its suffocating dude. crazed. obsessive because he's like why the fuck do YOU make me feel like this#whats different. i need to be a part of you. i need you to be a part of me.#and it aches in his chest and he loves so hard and he wants to be consumed by it when its the right person#absentmindedly been writing that into discord threads... that shackled up obsessiveness that he pushes down#but claws its way back out and then effectively makes him act a type of way:tm: with his partner#hes literally that quote thats like 'i still dont know how to love someone without swallowing them'#i love u cannibalism as a metaphor for love. yes im insane.#dont get me started on if he kisses someone too hard and his fangs catch their lip and they bleed because of it#he's normal i swear I SWEAR#taking a page out of mars' book again by writing my dissertation in the tags thank u good night
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the preview of jane being caught and you mentioned that it was inspired by an ask. i think it’s mine? is it about the reading and delving too much on trt that it bled into dreams? if yes, then omg. i cant wait on how you will turn the nightmare into reality 😭
if not, i will still think it’s connected and consider it an ask answered. thanks pasta. hope you’re getting better and better. miss your brain. 🙏🥰
That's the one! I couldn't find it in my box, there are two many asks, but the idea has been gnaaaawing furiously on my brain since you sent it in! Before I got sick, I wound up just having to write a little something cause the idea refused to leave me alone, and that little something turned into a BIG something (it's looking like 2 or 3 chapters). Which is great cause I'm still struggling with covid brain fog and I'm finding editing something already there a lot easier than writing something new. So it's win win for you and me! Though not for Jane and Matt, whoops. 😅
You're very welcome, anon! And thank you, I'm getting there. All I gotta beat now is the brain fog and the fatigue. Baby steps!
#the red thread#i've got like 2k asks in my box and can't find shit but#your ask IS THE ASK I WAS THINKING OF#you sent it in and it just chewed on my brain constantly for WEEKS#and i knew exactly how i'd write it#and it was so distracting that i wound up just writing it cause sometimes you gotta do that with an idea that won't leave#and now it is a nice big tasty chunk of pain and misery that i'm happily editing 😂#so thank you for the inspo and sending your ask in!#it's giving me a way to get back in while i'm still stuck in slow writey brain fog land 🥰
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general summary for link's botw verse just until i get the actual post up! accidental time travel shenanigans wherein he gets dropped in botw's temple of time a little after wild/prime link leaves the great plateau. has no idea what's going on other than this must be hyrule? but different. and everything's wrecked to shit and it does make him fearful of what might've happened here — of why he got dumped here in the first place.
then he sees what must be hyrule castle in the distance, old and crumbling?? and absolutely not how he left it or how he would've wanted to leave it, and the horror really hits him. what happened here?? he's saved hyrule once, is this— another hero's journey? another crisis he has to fix? ( was he too late? did he not get here fast enough, is that why everything's like this? is it his fault again? )
begins travelling to hyrule castle because surely, zelda or someone zelda-adjacent would be there, but his priorities slowly shift to finding and getting the master sword as he tries communicating with the locals and gathering information. it's hard at first when he can barely understand the hylian spoken in this era, but he's a fast learner! and sometimes it's not the people that tell you the most important things. all the ruins and devastated landscapes and monsters say a lot, and when he hears the watered-down, half-understood story of what happened at hyrule castle — the calamity — from a stablehand, he's convinced he needs to take up that mantle again, to "fulfill his destiny" once more.
so off he goes! tired, alone, guilty, but resolved. wandering in search of the sword he needs to do his duty; a duty he's always had and will always have, it looks like. he helps folks out where he can along the way, slowly getting accustomed to this new hyrule — hearing gossip and being gossiped about in turn.
( he's got no clue that there's already a link going around doing his self-appointed job aldfkjsg at least not until he goes to kakariko village or past the lost woods to korok forest? kakariko would be a more likely option. then he adds find this link(?) to his to-do list because he's gotta help out, chosen hero of this time or not! )
#* lionheart / study.#* intermission / ooc.#it's the 'he doesn't know much of what he is beyond what everyone needed him to be' complex#it's also the 'running away from unresolved trauma by finding a new Purpose to distract himself with' complex#but it's ALSO-also plain old 'i can't just IGNORE this (even if my time would be better spent looking for a way back whence i came)' heart#some details may be subject to change! but this is the general gist. thank you hilary for hashing this all out with me <3#i feel like i really do need to complete his games again before i can get comfy with threads so please bear with me as i do!#not a super long post but read more just in case!
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hey sorry for saying the wrong thing i wasn't socialized properly at the shelter. tbh i didn't even know there was a wrong dialogue option but apparantly there was and now you're all silently ignoring me and i'm here wondering what i should've said instead
#idk i always feel like im saying the wrong response in irl conversations lately#and idek what im doing wrong i just reply the way i always do which is find something related to the topic at hand and mention it#but it always fades into awkward silence after that and i realize that was probably not what they were looking for#like there was some other common thread i was supposed to follow instead of this one#and normally i feel like ppl are more chill abt going along with it or rerouting the conversation back or whatever#but now it's just awkward silence that makes me wanna scream#idk how to do casual conversation like the point of conversation for me is to find something that i can Talk about#like a fun lil fact or my favorite things. just something that lets you dig deeper and actually have a convo abt something you care abt#but lately whenever i do that it feels like im being shut down. and im not rlly sure what changed. is it just the ppl here? the environment?#all i know is that im dying to have an actual sincere in depth conversation and everyone here seems allergic to it.#idk maybe i should just shift gears and see if i can find other ppl like me here or just focus on friends outside my program#just. idk how to talk or relate to normal ppl. and maybe they'd take offense to that but idk how else to describe it#i need to talk to ppl who are Weird and Freaky and Fucked Up#and ik everyone's going through their own shit and everything but i don't think these ppl are on the same level of fucked up as me#idk this was a pretty random vent but I've been having trouble socializing with ppl lately#i think i should just stick to surface level stuff instead of trying to dig deeper#bc first idk if there even is something deeper to dig into. and second i don't rlly trust these ppl to be myself around them#it's just weird bc they seem close like they'll banter with each other and stuff but idk if there's any deep convos actually going on#just. idk. i always feel more fucked up and disabled when im around them. idk how ppl can just Do Stuff#mine#vent#random
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Missy2 is. As Timelord as the master has been in a long long time. And he knows it and. If it was easy he might- might- go back in some constellation but, as ive said many times b4, he'd rather kill himself than admit to his people at home he was wrong, sooo.
And then 18 likes- needs- to think she's theee furthest thing from time lord but umm. She's coming round back to it, yeah. Turning and turning in the widening gyre. Or. She would be if she had the SPOONS to be the herald of thundering justice and tinker of the universe she's 'supposed' to be. Woman who would be going on some sort of Spree but she can't do more than like two things a day.
#something something the doctor fixing wherever they land is the boy with his finger in a dam.#lost my own thread of focus multiple timesssss#eighteenth doctor#missy2#Doylistically hes Like That simply cuz. as i said. i enjoy a Gentlemanly Evil master far more on a. narrative and moral complexity level.#but you look at the Actual Story and why they Cant Go Back-#unless you're a herald of the theory of delgado being v late in the master's timeline. which. i do like- but not strictly relevant here-#and yknow. all the things that happaned since and you ask watsonianly why's he back and i think the answer is#he just kinda Wants to go back and thinks if he can pretend hard enough it will Work.#he's like. the thing w missy and 18 is in timelord terms they are surpassing Very Old and into the Incredibly /rarely/ old.#its not unreasonable to want to quit and retire. or at least find a comfier way to live than Evil Tyrant
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Its kinda funny how little i talk about my thoughts nowadays. I used to have so many opinions like 4 years ago
#i think i got kinda agoraphobic/codependant and inward about my brain#but i feel so. hm. self confident tn#rn*^#its nice#its like a side of myself i forgot i had#man i cant believe how many bad habits i slipped into#hard to deal with change and grief though. maybe this is just like.... im finally#able to live again a little?#i sure miss my boy tbh. but i know its stupid to miss a cat so much#he was my only friend for like the first 5 yrs of living alone after my dad kicked me out#8^/#idk if ill ever feel like that again. how i did back then. but maybe its good to find a new way to feel ok again#sighhh#the shit phantom thread soundtrack does to you!!!!!!#em yaps
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'look at me' 18+
oneshot - logan can't fuck like he used to, but you don't care. you get on top, gladly taking care of him in return. (2k words) pairing - logan howlett (logan 2017) x gn!reader tags: pre-established relationship, doggy style, penetration, dom!logan, reader rides logan, filthy talking logan, he talks you through it, rough, praise kink, cursing, mutual orgasm, choking, 'use your words', unprotected sex, creampie, sweet ending
logan can't keep up like he used to, but he still fucks you like a man possessed when he's able, like a rabid animal - hips bucking, muscles flexing, baring his teeth as he takes you.
his rough, calloused and scarred hands grip your waist, contrasting against your soft skin. that veiny length makes quick work of your needy hole, just like you wanted.
moments before, you'd teased him for the tent in his blue jeans. logan had cocked a smirk, that same signature smirk that always renders you weak at the knees as he began unbuckling his belt, taking his sweet time. you would wait, he knew you'd wait, you were good for him like that. the distinct sound of the clinking metal and the unsheathing of leather caused a shiver to run down your spine, a throbbing in your core. you needed him just as much as he needed you.
.・。.・゜✭・. .・。.・゜✭・. .・。.・゜✭・.
it wasn't fair, how he could tell as soon as he entered a room just how much you wanted him. he could smell it, smell your arousal clear as day, he'd teased you about it so many times. the scent fills his mind every time, makes his cock twitch in his boxers, the need to have you almost overwhelming.
your soft wanting moans drift to his ears, one of his palms sliding up to the base of your spine as he keeps you firmly bent over on the bed, fucking into you with purpose. rough grunting spills from his lips, your head turning to catch his eye, watching as beads of sweat form on his forehead. chest rising and falling, logan grits his teeth.
"this what you wanted, huh?" he grunts, his sentence punctuated with a particularly harsh thrust that knocks the wind from both of you, "you wanted my cock? hm? just couldn't fuckin' help but tease and tease. . ."
you whine, gripping the sheets in front of you as the room fills with the lewd sound of skin on skin. he always liked it rough, plus - you'd known logan long enough to know how he liked to channel his anger into sex. and he was fucking good at it. you'd take it, again and again, as harsh as he wanted to give. because you knew that as soon as you were done, he'd be scrambling to pepper soft kisses along your neck, praising you for how good you'd been for him.
his thrusts falter, and you reach back to take his wrist in your hand in a comforting gesture. the harsh panting tells you all you need to know, his grip on you fading. but it's alright, you know how to take care of him, too. you tug at his wrist and after a brief moment of hesitation, he pulls out and lays beside you, looking almost defeated.
your hips find their home atop his and you nestle against him, slowly grinding back and forth on his length. his hands immediately search for your thighs, pawing at the flesh as he looks up at you. you drink in his expression, the way he's looking at you through his heavy eyelids, his scarred, sweaty bare chest rising and falling harshly.
"let me take care of you. . ." you whisper, your hands sliding up across the feverish skin on his chest, threading through the hair that grows there.
he licks his lips, attempting to protest "but i-"
"shhhh. . ." you shake your head, inching upwards to brush his leaking tip against your entrance and he hisses at the contact, "i said let me take care of you. . ."
you sink down on his cock, gasping as he fills you once more - at this point, you've memorised every vein on that thing. you love how he fills you so completely, how you almost, almost struggle to take him in all the way.
"fuck. . ." he huffs, his eyes fluttering shut as he grasps your thighs, sinking into the bed. he hates it, hates how fucking tired he gets nowadays. but damn if you don't look like the prettiest little thing bouncing on his cock like that.
and you want to comfort him, to let him know that it's okay. you'd ride him every night if he'd let you, but he always insists that he can do it, that he can still go as hard and as fast as he used to all those years ago. fast or slow, it didn't bother you, as long as you had logan, you'd be happy, content with even a passing glance from him in your direction.
"look so pretty up there. . ." he coos breathlessly, watching you bounce, his hand snaking up to rest on your stomach as he admires you.
you moan, tilting your head back - and he groans in response, dick twitching desperately, aching to fill you as his hips buck against your movements. he loves watching you ride him like this, watching as you take control, set the pace you want.
the rough hand on your stomach drifts upwards, finding its home around your neck, gently still. but even the soft grip has you reeling, gripping his wrist. you know he still wants to feel some control, that it wasn't because he was losing energy that he was on his back, no. . . it was a choice.
and you indulge him, working down over his cock with your tight hole, clamping around him as your hips meet his over and over. he's groaning, grumbling, eyes fluttering shut as he's lost in the way you take him.
"logan, look at me. . ." you whisper pleadingly, nails digging into his chest, fingertips tracing across the scars there.
immediately his eyes open to lock onto yours, and when he sees you? fuck, he needs more. he uses his grip on your throat to pull you down into a deep kiss, breathing heavily through his nose as his tongue delves into your mouth. you love how much more experienced he is than you, how he makes quick work of you every fucking time, has you a mess for him, opening up to him in every way you can.
"yeah. . . that's it. . ." he grumbles against your lips, kissing you with a fierce passion that borders on animalistic between words, "keep workin' that cock, keep bouncin', you're doin' so well."
you clench around him at those very words, unable to even think straight with his tongue shoved into your mouth and his cock stuffed deep inside you. he's taking you in every way you'll give yourself to him. even with him on his back and with half his energy he's still able to have you squirming.
and the praise, the fucking praise. logan knows just how to talk to you to make you melt. he'll fuck you roughly, desperately pumping his dick into you whilst whispering that you're the prettiest thing he's ever seen into your ear. he'll have you split in half with his thick arms hooked around your legs whilst telling you that you're so good for him, calling you sweet pet names that contrast his rough movements.
that voice of his, gravely, deep, rumbling. you can't think straight when he talks to you this way.
"such a sweet little thing," he groans, his hand on your thigh snaking around to give your ass a quick slap before grabbing a handful. light work for him considering the size of his hands - don't even get him started on what he likes to do with those. . .
you call his name, whimpering against his lips as you try to keep up with his kisses all while riding him. your mind is blank, slamming your hips down against him as he bucks up, meeting your thrusts - sending him deeper and deeper.
his hand on your neck traces along your skin to grip the back of your head, feeling as his digits spread across your scalp. "fuuuuuck," he groans, "can feel how tight you are, you're gonna cum, huh?" logan asks, though it's less of a question and more of a statement. he knows your body better than you do.
you nod, whimpering pathetically, inches from his lips.
eyes darting from your mouth, up into your gaze, he grins, "use your words, c'mon. i asked you a question."
"yes logan, yes, fuck- i'm gonna cum!" you cry out, tilting your hips as you chase that high he wants to give you.
with his mouth open, he pants, watching you above him with a keen fascination as your face contorts in pleasure. slowly, a smirk tugs at the corner of his lips. his favourite thing in the world is to watch you come undone around him, the way your eyes roll back, your pulse quickening under his fingertips.
"c'mon, c'mon, c'mon. . ." he growls, rutting into you from below, feeling as you spasm around his hard, girthy length, "if you cum, i'll cum nice and deep inside you, you'd like that, wouldn't you?"
"logan. . ." you whine, a clear yes. your head dips down to press against his shoulder, unable to keep yourself upright with the intensity of it all.
he chuckles and it's like music to your ears, loving those rare little noises of his - treasuring the sounds he makes while enjoying you.
both hands are back on your hips now, guiding you, slamming you down onto him as you gasp with each thrust, "c'mon. . . give me what i want, what we both want - make a mess for me."
his words hit you like a command, a call to arms - you will cum for him, make a mess of him and his sheets. you're calling his name into the skin of his neck as you cry out, feeling the orgasm beginning to tear through you.
and he can feel it, feel how you convulse and clamp down on his dick, causing him to gasp. he's moaning, groaning, words catching at the back of his throat as he tries to continue to talk you through it - but he can't. you're fucking him too good, he's gonna cum too.
ropes and ropes of white hot cum fill you, pushed deeper and deeper by his faltering thrusts as his dick twitches with each spray. you gasp, writhing against him as he holds you firmly in place, pulling you down one last time and holding you there as he empties into you completely.
you're whimpering, whining, body jerking as the intensity increases as you roll your hips, riding out the last of your orgasm until you're both left a panting, sweaty mess.
"holy fuck. . ." he whispers into the air, closing his eyes to centre himself, world spinning.
meanwhile, you can't even talk, can't even think about forming words, mind instead occupied with feeling his hot cum dripping out of you.
logan pets the back of your head, stroking your hair gently in an attempt to help you come back into the moment. he wants to thank you, but that's never been his strong suit. instead, he kisses the crown of your head, peppering kisses down along your forehead as he hooks his thumb and forefinger under your chin to bring your face closer to his.
he looks into your hazy, exhausted eyes, his own gaze full of love and appreciation. this is what he lives for - watching you bathe in the afterglow, being lucky enough to look into your eyes every day, being blessed enough to have you here like this.
you greet him with a sleepy, almost bashful smile.
he smiles too, and god, butterflies blossom deep within your stomach. you love him, you love him tired, you love him angry, you love him grumpy, you love him on his back, on top - whatever, you just love him.
"you're too good for me," he whispers as his lips find your forehead once more.
you know those words are his way of saying thanks, but you shake your head in protest, "stop that, not another word."
logan looks into your eyes, really looks at you, those soft hazel hues meeting your gaze. he simply smiles in silence as his hand drifts to your cheek.
the room falls into a comfortable silence, and you wonder how logan ever let you this close. but you don't care, all you care about is taking care of him.
and you will, for as long as he lets you.
#my writing#wolverine x reader#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan howlett x f!reader#wolverine smut#logan howlett x you#logan howlett smut#wolverine fanfiction#the wolverine#wolverine#logan howlett x y/n#logan howlett#deadpool#deadpool and wolverine#james howlett#deadpool 3#deadpool movie#james logan howlett#x men#xmen fanfiction#x men movies#marvel x reader#marvel#mcu#marvel cinematic universe#marvel comics#marvel mcu#hugh jackman#old man logan
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@sisturn is... : a low and ghastly groan rumbles from the ground beneath the fresh corpse of a butterfly. the lily’s petals twitch as it levitates into the air rapidly, white ectoplasm erupting from it and twisting into the quite vague form of a human. lo, Abigail enters the constant for the first time, sitting cross-legged on the ground. she stretches her arms above her head. a horrid noise escapes her—it could easily be mistaken for a dying scream were it not for the fact it wavers and tapers off like an innocent yawn. abigail then rubs her eyes, mumbling. “mmmn… wh’ time’s it? was gonna sleep in today…”
It had felt like an eternity since that day on the cliff. Maybe it was. She could count the days that had passed in this realm, but who knew how much time had passed outside of it? At any rate, there was something she had been working on, aside from the usual finding food and keeping a torch on her person when she could.
The man with her father's face had made her a promise, and if he hadn't kept his word, there would be hell to pay.
Although she hadn't understood the feeling emanating from the flower at first, it hadn't taken Wendy long to start putting the pieces together about what this flower might mean. Maybe it was her sister's presence, trying to break free even still.
She could only hope, after all. And through that, she had begun trying to do things while the flower had room to do something. Crafting things, collecting items, those first things didn't do all that much. She was brainstorming until she found a butterfly among the flowers. Although she normally wouldn't wish to hurt the small creature, she was getting somewhat battered, and those wings had quite the nutritional content. So, with the nearby flower still out, she murders the creature with her axe.
This causes the final piece to be taken. And in that spot, there her mirror stood.
Abigail had finally come back.
Wendy wasn't sure what to do now. She didn't want to cry, she had told herself to stop doing such a thing. But once it had happened, once she could truly see Abigail in the semi-flesh, the tears couldn't stop once they'd started. Her other was the same as ever, it was as if she hadn't even died. It felt so nice to see that, so good to know that spectral experiences she had faced hadn't changed her much. Or had she not even known? She didn't know, and frankly, it didn't matter.
"I-It's you... It's really you-" Wendy states, her voice quivers, before finally breaking into sobbing. "Thank god... Thank god..."
For the first time in a while, she felt able to let everything out.
#ic - useless and missing a piece#threads - finding my way back to you#the constant beckons - don't starve 1 verse#abigail - this is our birthday / so why are we weeping?#sisturn#the emotions#it's so good i love it
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I don't think I can ever describe it decently enough but finding a kindred spirit (of sorts) between two authors' voices (especially when they are so distinct from one another and unique to themselves) is so magical.
#this is about me thinking i found a mirror of elizabeth strout’s pen around lucy barton and tezer özlü’s ‘cold nights of childhood’#even though they are so so different from one another#if i didn’t know that cold nights of childhood was only translated to english for the first time last year#i would swear that strout had read it#which makes it even more insane!#art!!!#it materializes in such similar but distinct ways from such different individuals with such different lives and experiences!#i wish i was smarter so i could talk about it in a way that made sense#aaarrghhh it’s makes me want to chew on drywall!#i've only ever read this one novel by özlü and it has kind of fucked me up while comforting me at the same time#and strout also fucked me up while comforting me in a completely different manner!#idk it might just be because i read them back to back that my brain is trying real hard to want to find a thread that connects them lol#i do think i have to read “cold nights of childhood” a couple times more to truly grasp and digest it#that book is about 65 pages and it punches you in the stomach in almost every page#and i don't know my thoughts around this could change after a reread but for the time being this unhinged opinion shall stay here
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𝐒𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐄𝐑!!!
𝐒𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐫!𝐆𝐞𝐭𝐨 𝐒𝐮𝐠𝐮𝐫𝐮 𝐱 𝐒𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐊𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐫!𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: Never in your wildest dreams did you think you’d find out that your crush, Geto Suguru, was just like you: a murderer. Not only that but you share the same passion; killing criminals and pedophiles! (Happy Kinktober) 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: DARK CONTENT, gore, mutilation, murder, mentions of pedophiles (y/n kills them), serial killing, unprotected sex, breeding, choking, teasing, knife play, whipped Suguru 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 10.3k 𝐀/𝐧: This is based HEAVILY on the novel Butcher and Blackbird by Brynne Weaver. The original idea is credited to Brynne Weaver ONLY. This work is fan fiction and is not intended for commercial purposes or to infringe on the intellectual property rights of the original author.
Being a serial killer who kills other killers, pedophiles, and rapists is a great hobby.
Until you find yourself locked in a cage.
For three days.
No AC.
With a body you carved up.
You glare at the fly-riddled corpse whose legs are kneeling opposite of you in the locked cage you were both trapped in. The air is thick with the putrid stench of decay, a relentless assault on your senses. The body's skin is pallid, marred by the writhing mass of white maggots that feast mercilessly. Where eyes once held gaze, now only hollow sockets remain, tediously scooped out and vacant. The ears too have been sheared off, leaving clean edges that blend into the mottled, blood-stained flesh. Its chest has been cracked open; ribs pried apart in a macabre mimicry of an unhinged broken cocoon, revealing the dark, empty cavity where a heart once beat.
Then, of course, the piste de resistance of your work, the removed eyes, ears, and heart rest in the corpse's upturned palms—placed with ceremonial care amidst the chaos of mutilation.
So now, if anyone were to walk down the steps of Gary Green House's basement, they would not only find his mutilated body, but the person who did it, trapped in a cage together.
"Fuck." You curse at yourself for the millionth time since you've been trapped here for the last three days. The cold realization that you've fallen into Gary’s final trap gnaws at your mind as relentlessly as the maggots at the corpse across from you. The cage, a cruel relic of Gary’s twisted pleasures, had seemed the perfect place for your ritual—turning the hunter into the hunted in his own den of horrors. But in your fervor to see him pay, you overlooked one crucial detail: the cage's sinister design, which sealed shut the moment its door swung closed.
The remote control, now a mocking symbol of freedom, lies just beyond the bars, on a small, grimy table. You remember the sickening click of the lock, the finality of it echoing in the cramped space as you turned back from the grisly task of dismembering Gary—his last, silent victory.
Even the idiot police could deduce that this was all your doing, seeing as all your bloody tools were still with you in your backpack. With fingerprints. It was just a matter of time before they opened the basement door.
You could practically hear Gary’s voice from beyond the grave: "Hah! Serves you right, you stupid bitch! That's what you get for killing me!" The taunt echoes in your head like a song over and over again and you're seriously contemplating banging your head against the iron bars.
"FUCK FINE!" You yell into the darkness. "I renounce my wicked ways!"
"That's a shame. I bet I would like your wicked ways."
You jump at the sound of a man's deep, smooth voice, the cadence of slight raspiness warming every note. Your curses cut the humid air from the startlement of the man's presence. How the hell did he even get in here? You didn't hear the basement door open. You scurry out of reach of the man who saunters into the thin thread of light from the narrow window, the glass opaque with fly shit.
"You seem to be in a predicament." He says stepping into view. The thin light from the window partially illuminates him, allowing you to make out his face. Oh rather, what is on his face.
Holy shit.
A ghost mask stares back at you, its hollow eyes and elongated mouth frozen in a chilling scream. The stark white of the mask contrasts sharply with the surrounding shadows, and you watch with wide eyes as he tilts his head.
Holy shit holy shit holy shit.
In any other situation, you might be fan-girling. You know exactly who you're staring at: the infamous Crucifer, a killer, like you, but notorious for his crucifixion of criminals in rather, flamboyant displays. The few eyewitness accounts of the Crucifer all mention the ghost mask, leaving no doubt in your mind about his identity.
While your hunting grounds have been Osaka, his have typically been Tokyo, but despite the geographical difference, his reputation precedes him. In all honesty, you shouldn’t be surprised he’s here. Your victim, Gary Greenwich, is notorious even among the authorities. Despite his crimes, the lack of solid evidence has always allowed him to slip through the cracks of the justice system, leaving him free to continue his heinous activities. He was high on your kill list, and it’s no surprise he was high on Crucifers as well.
He takes a few steps closer toward the cage to stare down at the corpse, bending to take a closer look.
"Well what happened here?" He chuckles.
You are on day three of no food. No water. The gnawing hunger in your stomach feels like a relentless beast, clawing at your insides with increasing ferocity. You wonder if your body has started to eat its own organs at this point.
You can't deal with this shit.
"Self defense." You say.
The man chuckles. "I doubt that, you're not his type." Despite his mask you can feel his eyes shift from the corpse to linger on you.
"And how would you know that?"
"Well disregarding the state in which you "self defense" left him, you're not a 6 year old boy. And," he steps closer so now he is inches away from the bars and his whole body is illuminated. "I make it my business to know."
You don't answer. Instead you watch as he crouches down to meet your gaze. You try to hide behind your tangled hair and folded limbs, giving him only your eyes.
And of course, just your luck, he is stunning
Black hair flows behind his mask and down his shoulder. He's wearing a black compression shirt that hugs every muscle of his biceps and forearms, accentuating his athletic build. His broad shoulders enhance his imposing presence, giving him the aura of a seasoned athlete. Black cargo pants complete his ensemble, practical and intimidating, with a hunting knife sticking out of his pocket, probably what he would've used on Gary if you hadn't got to him first.
Something about him looks familiar, something you can't put your finger on.
"I guess you made it your business to know too." He pauses before moving even closer so his mask is practically pressed against the iron bars. "Hey, you look pretty familiar."
You shift uncomfortably, feeling the prickle of anxiety creeping up your spine. Instinctively, you brush a tangled lock of hair from your face, wincing as it catches on your dry lips. The man's shoulders tense as if he has been electrocuted.
"Y/n?" His voice cuts through the thick silence like a knife.
Oh, what the hell.
You jerk your head up from your hunched posture, eyes wide in shock, meeting the unsettling, hollow eyes of the ghost mask. Your heart races, pounding loudly in your chest.
"Wha-"
"Oh my god, it is you!" He exclaims, his loud deep voice echoing through the basement.
"I'm sorry, I don't-" you stammer, confusion and fear knotting in your stomach.
"It's me," he interrupts, and with a swift motion, he takes off his mask. The sight of his familiar face makes your breath catch in your throat. "Suguru Geto."
Suguru Geto. The name alone sent ripples through your thoughts, dragging along memories and emotions you had long buried. Suguru wasn’t just any ordinary guy; he was a micro-celebrity in Tokyo, renowned for his breathtaking tattoo artistry. His ink adorned the bodies of celebrities, flaunted in TikToks and Instagram posts that garnered thousands of likes. His reputation was impeccable, his designs sought after by the elite.
You had crossed paths with Suguru a few times at various parties, your social circles occasionally overlapping due to mutual friends. Each encounter left an indelible mark on you. His presence was magnetic, drawing you in like a moth to a flame. It wasn’t just his talent that made him irresistible; it was everything about him. Those hawk-like eyes that seemed to pierce through to your very soul, the perfect curve of his lips that could shift from a smirk to a genuine smile in an instant, and those dimples that appeared whenever he graced you with that smile—each feature was a weapon, effortlessly disarming.
You, like many other girls, harbored a secret crush on Suguru Geto. It was impossible not to. That face alone could kill, and his charisma was the final blow.
And now, here he was, standing right in front of you, unmasked and undeniably real. The reality of it all hit you like a tidal wave, leaving you breathless and a little overwhelmed.
Suguru clears his throat, a small smirk playing on his lips from how obviously you are gawking at him.
"Shot in the dark here but are you the Mute Collector?"
You part your lips to say something but you can't seem to form the right words.
"I-"
Suguru's grin widens and a sharp laugh escapes his perfect mouth. "Oh my god. I knew it. I fucking knew they had it wrong about you with that bull shit profile they built. What was it, they said you were a 30 year old white man?" Suguru throws his head back and smiles at the ceiling. "And the Mute Collector? You? That's just awesome. I'm such a huge fan."
"Yeah..." You clear your throat and push your hair completely out of your face. He grins at you, as though awe struck, and if you weren't wearing 100 layers of grime on your skin you are sure he'd be able to see the blush flaming in your cheeks for a second.
"And you?" You nod toward the mask. "You are?" You don't know why you are feigning ignorance but something about humbling him seems tastier than actual food right now.
"Oh come on." Suguru's tone flattens and he brings the mask up next to his face.
"The Crucifer?"
You shake your head.
"The cross maker?"
You shake your head again. Lying through your teeth is fun.
"The Tokyo Butcher?" When you shake your head he sighs and stands up. "Well," he glances to Gary whose maggots have made their way to the empty eye sockets. "What do you say? We ditch this lousy scene and get something to eat. Maybe when you get food in your stomach you will remember some of my little nicknames."
Your eyes widen and your stomach growls loudly, reminding you of how long it's been since you last ate. You glance up at your Suguru, a mix of hope and suspicion in your gaze.
"Are you serious?" you ask, your voice hoarse from dehydration.
"Yeah, after we get you a shower, some clothes and burn the house down."
You gulp and stand to your feet. "Could we get burgers?"
Suguru grins before grabbing the remote and pointing it at the cage.
"Fine by me."
~
The Mute Collector.
Geto Suguru is sitting across from the fucking Mute Collector.
And god you are beautiful.
Not that he just realized it now. Like many others, he has always known how attractive you are; he just pushed it to the back of his mind. But now, knowing who you really are and what you do in your free time, your body has practically been encompassed in bright warm light and your head adorned with a halo. He watches as you down your 6th cup of water with a sigh and wipe your mouth with your sleeve.
The two of you sit in a cozy booth at a restaurant, the warm, smoky aroma filling the air. Suguru leans back with a beer in hand, watching you with a mix of amusement and caution. The waitress approaches, placing a large plate with a double cheeseburger and fries in front of you. Your eyes light up, and without wasting a second, you pick up the cheeseburger with your fingers and take a big bite, savoring the flavors.
Suguru chuckles, raising his beer in a mock toast. "You look like you've just found the Holy Grail."
He doesn't miss the way you stifle back a laugh, trying to speak through a mouthful of burger. "If the Holy Grail were covered in cheese and ketchup, then yeah, maybe."
He takes a sip of his beer, grinning. "I’ve never seen someone so excited about food. Maybe you should give up your little hobby and do food reviews."
"Well, that's what being trapped in a cage with the rotting corpse of a pedophile does to you I guess." You grumble, setting down the burger and taking another drink of water.
Suguru's eyes stay on you, and he takes the opportunity to really assess you. Your hair is damp, and the wetness seeps into the white Mickey Mouse shirt you're wearing, causing it to cling slightly to your skin and reveal the elegant lines of your collarbone. He bought that shirt and the shorts for you at a thrift store, and despite the fact that such clothes should look bad on anyone, you are rocking them effortlessly.
He can't help but notice that you didn't buy a bra, a fact that makes him smile to himself.
No bra.
"So tell me." Suguru sets his beer back on the table and leans in.
"The whole ears, eyes and heart thing." He waves his left hand in the air. "The police say it's satanic ritual stuff but I don't buy it."
You pause, a hint of a smile playing at your lips as you meet his gaze. "It's simple, really. Hear no evil, see no evil, fear no evil."
Suguru raises an eyebrow. "You have a way of making the macabre sound poetic."
You're about to reach for a fry, but he snatches it before your fingers could reach it.
"Why not the tongue?" He says. "You know, speak no evil."
You roll your eyes and snatch the fry out of his fingers. "Tongues are hard to cut, too slippery and make a mess."
He nods thoughtfully, leaning back in his seat. "You know, most people would be horrified to hear you talk like that."
"Good thing you’re not most people," you reply with a smirk.
"Touché."
He watches as your lips wrap around the thick fry and your teeth rip off half of it into your mouth.
No bra.
"What about you Suguru?" You lock eyes with him. "Why are you here?"
"Why am I here?"
"You heard me. You swoop in all superman-like, save me from the dipshit’s pedo dungeon and take me out for a double cheeseburger. Why are you here?"
Suguru shrugs and averts his gaze from your unyielding stare. Shit, your piercing eyes are almost making him sweat.
"Same thing you already did. I was going to skin him alive and and display the fucking monkey Jesus style infront of his house. At least, something like that."
"Yeah but why him? I thought your hunting grounds were in Tokyo?"
Your eyes widen slightly as the words hang in the air, the weight of your mistake sinking in immediately. You feel a rush of heat to your cheeks, a telltale sign of your embarrassment. Your lips part as if to take back the words, but it's too late; they've already been spoken.
A sly smile spreads across Sugurus face as he watches your face fall.
"Oh you totally know who I am Y/n."
"Fucking hell."
"You do! You know that I like to hunt near my home, how long have you been a part of my fan club?"
You roll your eyes and fall back into your seat. You blink rapidly, trying to maintain your composure, but the subtle tension in your jaw and the furrowing of your brow betray your embarrassment.
"So which one was your favorite? The monkey I strung up next to the police station? Or the one I flayed inside the Tokyo Union Church?"
"Oh my god I can already tell you are going to be insufferable." You grumble, the heat of embarrassment slowly dissipating as you take a deep breath. Suguru leans back, a mischievous glint in his eyes as he swirls the beer in his hand, watching you with an almost predatory curiosity. As seconds pass, Suguru assesses your face, following how your eyes dart around the room, searching for an escape route, and Suguru’s playful expression falters for a split second. He realizes with a sudden jolt that you're trying to leave. He can't have that. He needs to see you again.
"Hey speaking of suffering," Suguru clears his throat. "Have you heard about the women killings in Kyoto?"
Your eyebrows raise, curiosity piqued. "Yeah, I've heard. Pretty gruesome stuff. Why do you ask?"
A playful smile tugs at his lips. "How about a friendly competition? The killer's already taken six lives so far."
You tilt your head, your eyes narrowing slightly as you try to decipher his intentions. "What do you mean by a competition?"
Suguru leans in closer, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. "That's exactly what it sounds like. Who can hunt him down first?"
For a moment, you're taken aback, your eyes widening as you process his proposal. A mix of surprise and intrigue flickers across your face. "Are you serious?"
He chuckles, clearly enjoying your reaction. "As sin."
"And what do we get if we win?"
Suguru's eyes gleam with amusement and something else—admiration. "Bragging rights, of course. And maybe... another dinner like this one."
You throw your head back and let out a laugh. "Oh yeah? Who says I'll need you to get me another dinner?"
"Can't let you go hungry again. What do you say?”
~
You sit at your desk, the dim light of your laptop casting a pale glow on your face as you scroll through articles about the woman killer from Kyoto. The room is quiet, save for the occasional click of your mouse and the hum of the laptop. Your phone buzzes, and you glance at the screen to see Shoko’s name. With a smile, you answer the call.
"Hey Shoko, how’s your night shift?" you greet her with a teasing tone.
Shoko’s laugh crackles through the speaker. "Busy as always. Just patched up a guy who thought he could outsmart a bulletproof vest with sheer willpower. Spoiler: he couldn’t."
You chuckle, shaking your head. "Sounds like my type of guy."
By day, Shoko is your best friend and a dedicated med student, excelling in her studies with a, albeit, half hearted, passion for helping others. But when the sun sets, she transforms into the notorious Dr. Reverse, the underground doctor every criminal and lowlife turns to in their time of need. Using her medical expertise, she serves those who cannot seek help through legal means, operating in the shadows and patching up criminals who live by a different set of rules. In addition to her medical skills, she also deals in poisons, further cementing her reputation in the underworld.
You first met Shoko in a moment of desperation. After cornering a serial rapist, you were attacked with a machete, almost severing your arm. With nowhere else to turn, you sought out Dr. Reverse. Shoko skillfully sewed you up and, in the process, deduced that you were the infamous Mute Collector. To your surprise, she didn't seem to care about your identity, and you, in turn, didn't question her underground business or her dealings with poison. This mutual understanding and acceptance laid the foundation for a strong bond, and you've been best friends ever since.
Shoko laughed, a sound that always manages to lift your spirits. "Right? Anyway, what's up? I saw your SOS text."
You hesitate, glancing at the photo of Geto Suguru on your screen on a separate tab. His annoyingly white teeth glare back at you, and you try to resist staring at his six pack in an instagram photo someone took of him at a pool party. His dark eyes seemed to stare right through you, as if mocking your indecision. "It's about Geto."
There was a brief pause before Shoko's voice came back, tinged with curiosity. "Geto? What about him?"
You take a deep breath, your fingers drumming nervously on the desk. "He's the Crucifier."
Shoko's reaction was immediate and loud. "Geto is what?" she practically yelled through the phone, causing you to wince.
"The Crucifier. I know." You scoffed, rolling your eyes at the absurdity of it all. "Can you believe it?"
Shoko let out a low whistle. "Wow. I mean, he always seemed like a guy with secrets, but I never pegged him for a serial killer, I mean, someone like you."
"Yeah, well, here we are," You mutter, rubbing your temples. You focus your attention back on your computer screen. Suguru is squeaky clean, not even a bad review on his website. There was only his questionable taste in best friends: Gojo Satoru—the biggest playboy and the infamous heir to the Gojo Company, Japan's largest and most influential corporation. Gojo's notoriety was legendary, his exploits plastered across tabloids and whispered in gossip circles. You’ve met, and been hit on by the man a few times, and not once did you fall for any of his slimy cheap antics. No, Geto Suguru is who your eyes fell on.
"And now he’s proposed some sort of competition."
"A competition?" Shoko's voice was practically dripping with amusement. "Like a hunting competition?”
You let out a snort of air through your nose. “Basically.”
Are you gonna do it?"
"I don't know," You admit, leaning forward and resting your chin on your hand. "I said I would, but I don't know. I barely know the guy. Well, I thought I did."
"Well, you should," Shoko said, her tone shifting to one of gentle teasing. "Besides, isn't this your chance to get closer to your crush?"
You feel your cheeks flush. "Shoko, seriously? Come on, that was ages ago."
"Hey, I'm just saying," she replies, laughter bubbling up again. "This could be your big break."
"You're impossible," you grumble, though you can't help but smile. "How's the side business, by the way?"
"Thriving," she says and you can practically see her small smile through the phone.. "You'd be amazed at how many people need a little untraceable something for their enemies."
"I don't doubt it," you say, shaking your head. "Just stay safe, okay?"
"You too, Mute Collector," Shoko says, her voice softening slightly. "And remember, if you ever need anything, you know where to find me."
"Always," you reply, your smile growing wider. "Thanks, Shoko. Talk to you soon."
"Later," she says, and the line goes dead.
You lean back in your chair again, your thoughts drifting back to Geto Suguru and the strange, dangerous world you both inhabit. As much as you hate to admit it, Shoko is right. This is your chance, not just to catch some sick killer, but to uncover the secrets that lie hidden beneath Suguru’s enigmatic exterior.
With a sigh, you close your laptop and stand up, determination settling in your chest. The competition awaits, and you have a feeling it's going to be a game changer.
~
“What’s got your panties in a twist?”
Suguru rolls his eyes at the white hair man’s mocking tone and continues to stare at his phone. It's been 10 minutes. How long does it take for someone to respond to a text. Suguru lay sprawled on the couch, his eyes fixed on his phone. Across the room, Gojo was bustling about in the kitchen, the sound of utensils clinking and food sizzling filling the air.
"Is this about Y/n? The Mute Collector or whatever?" Gojo asked, glancing over his shoulder with a mischievous grin.
Suguru didn't respond, his gaze unwavering from the screen. He could feel Gojo's eyes on him, the scrutiny almost tangible.
"I don't think I've seen you put this much effort into a woman since, like... ever," Gojo continued, his tone teasing. He turned back to his cooking, the corners of his mouth twitching with amusement.
Suguru's jaw tightened, but he kept his silence. Gojo, undeterred, pressed on. "Besides the fact that she's the Mute Collector, what do you even see in Y/n? Well, I guess she does have other assets," he chuckled.
"Keep her name out of your fucking mouth, you prick," Suguru snapped, his voice low and menacing.
Gojo raised his hands in mock surrender, a laugh escaping his lips. "Alright, alright, no need to get all territorial."
Suguru continued to stare at his phone, his fingers hovering over the keys. "How long does it take for someone to respond to a fucking text" he mutters under his breath.
Gojo leaned against the counter, arms crossed. "Maybe she's busy. Or maybe she's just messing with you. You know, playing hard to get."
Suguru finally looks up, his eyes narrowing. "She doesn't play games. And she's not hard to get—she's hard to keep."
Gojo raises an eyebrow, clearly amused by Suguru's reaction. “Touchy, touchy,” he mutters, returning to his culinary task.
Just then, Suguru's phone pings. His heart skips a beat as he sees your name flash on the screen. He quickly opens the message, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips as he reads your response.
Y/n: Fine, I'll do it. But what are the details?
Suguru: Oh, I'm thrilled
Y/n: Shut up.
Suguru: The rules are simple: whoever deduces the monkey’s identity first and guts the bastard wins.
Y/n: And how do I know you don’t already have a head start?
Suguru: I guess you'll just have to trust me.
Y/n: Trust you? That’s rich coming from someone who literally stabs people in the back.
Suguru lets out a snort of air from your comment catching Gojo’s attention. “Ah, there it is. The smile of a man who's finally gotten what he wants.”
Suguru doesn't dignify that with a response. Instead, he focuses on your message, feeling a grin grow on his lips.
Suguru: You wound me, truly. But where’s the fun without a little challenge? Besides, I wouldn’t want to make it too easy for you
Y/n: Easy, huh? I suppose you think you’re quite the genius, then?
Suguru: Only compared to the average monkey. You, on the other hand, might actually make this interesting.
Y/n: Is that a compliment or are you just trying to butter me up?
Suguru: Can’t it be both?
Y/n: Oh, don't worry. You’re not the only one who enjoys a good chase. But don’t cry when I beat you at your own game.
Suguru: Cry? Please. I’ll be too busy admiring you in action. It’s a win-win for me.
Y/n: Flattery will get you nowhere, Suguru.
Suguru: Really?
Suguru: Not even a little bit princess 🥺?
Y/n: *One attachment*
You send an image of your hand flipping him off. Your middle finger nail is painted black and he assumes so are all your other fingers. His heart thuds against his chest. God, how he would love to have those nails dragging down his back. His dick twitches just thinking about it.
Gojo snickers as if he can read Suguru’s thoughts and Suguru considers throwing his phone at the smug white hair man when Gojo’s phone rings. Any humor falls off Gojo’s features like snow from a shaken tree branch. He glances at the caller ID, his eyes narrowing, and picks up the phone with a serious tone.
“This is Gojo.” He says. His voice is gruff as he responds to the caller with clipped “yes” and “no” answers, his timbre low. “I'll be there in 30 minutes.”
When he sets down the phone, Suguru meets his blue eyes, Gojo’s brief smile is grim.
“Trouble?” Suguru asks.
“Trouble.” Gojo repeats.
On the exterior Gojo is Japan's most infamous playboy and philanthropist. But by night he is the devil's tool, the country's most lethal assassin for anyone from politicians to presidents. What Suguru and you do for a hobby, Gojo Satoru does for his job.
Gojo dumps his hot food in a container, grabs his hunting knife coat and bag and heads for the door. Before he exits, he turns around to lock eyes with Suguru.
“Be safe. A woman killer is a deadly combo.” He says.
Suguru chuckles, and for a second he doesn't know if Gojo’s talking about you or the guy in Kyoto. “You to ass hat.”
~
You can't believe you are doing this.
You can't believe that you took up Suguru’s competition, spent 120 dollars on a train and hotel room at Kyoto and an extra 20 on room service. Moreover you can't believe that you are here, hiding in a forest of bamboo shoots at the dead of night, watching some man who may or may not be the Kyoto women killer.
It’s a warm summer night, and every time the wind blows, the bamboo shoots rustle against each other, creating a haunting melody that sets your nerves on edge. The air is thick with the scent of earth and foliage, and the occasional hoot of an owl punctuates the silence. You’re crouched low, your body tense, watching a man named Noaya Zenin who you followed out here. He seems to be wandering aimlessly, but you know better than to underestimate him. The Zenin clan's reach is long and shadowy, and their involvement in the Kyoto women killings is a tangled web you’ve been unraveling. All key witnesses were either paid off by the Zenin clan or had lawyers representing them from the Zenin clan. The pattern was too precise to be a coincidence.
Your heart thuds in your chest, adrenaline coursing through your veins. The thrill of the chase, the hunt, makes your senses sharper, every movement and sound more pronounced. You can feel the need creeping up on you, slowly reaching your brain until your skin itches with anticipation.
Each minute feels like an eternity as you scrutinize Noaya’s every move. He stops occasionally, looking around as if sensing he’s being watched, and you hold your breath, pressing yourself closer to the ground. The moonlight filters through the dense bamboo, casting eerie shadows that dance with the wind. Your mind races, piecing together fragments of evidence and suspicion. If Noaya Zenin is indeed the killer, catching him here could be the breakthrough you need.
“Hiya.”
A scream almost rips through you when you feel someone's breath against your ear, but you quickly cover your mouth and whip around. Of course, you’re met face to face with the man you least wanted to see right now. Familiar hazel eyes gaze back at you, glinting with mischief and amusement. Suguru is crouched right next to you, his nose mere inches from yours, a sly smirk on his face. You didn’t even hear him approach.
“Suguru, what the fuck?” you hiss, keeping your voice low. Your first instinct is to grab your knife out of your pocket and press it against his throat but he holds both his hands up as if surrendering, stopping you.
“Woah woah princess, let's cool our engines.” He chuckles softly, clearly enjoying your reaction.
Your pulse is still racing, but you force yourself to calm down. “You could have given me a heart attack. How did you even find me?” You seethe.
“I have my ways,” he replies cryptically, his smirk widening. “Besides, I couldn’t let you have all the fun, now could I? So,” his eyes flicker to Noaya, who still seems to be staring at his phone. “Who are we looking at?”
“We?” You scoff and roll your eyes. “Are you kidding me? There is no we. This is a competition, remember? Go do your own research.”
Suguru raises an eyebrow, clearly amused. “Oh, come on. You know you love my company.”
Before you can retort, Noaya picks up his phone. You both strain to listen, and you catch his words clearly.
“Yeah, I’m at the bamboo forest. See you soon, babe.” He then hangs up the phone with a click and puts it back in his backpack. But just when you're about to turn back to Suguru and rip into the man, Noaya pulls something else out too. A hunting knife. A large one at that with serrated ends and a pointed tip that glints in the moon light. Just like the one used on the victims. And as if things couldn't get any more apparent, you watch as a wicked grin spreads across his face when he draws the blade diagonally through the air.
“Oh shit,” you whisper, eyes wide. “That’s definitely him. That’s like some comically evil villain shit right there.”
“Dibs,” Suguru whispers back, a glint of excitement in his eyes as he puts on his ghost mask. “I call fucking dibs.” He stands up, the crunch of leaves making Noaya whip around and stare right at the area you both hid in.
For a solid 5 seconds your two flabbergasted to even form words, you can only watch as Suguru steps out from the bamboo shoots and onto the trail, slowly walking toward Noaya like a lion cornering a gazelle.
Or course, Noaya turns, screams like a little girl, and makes a hard right straight into the forest of bamboos.
“Oh hell no,” you mutter, leaping up and chasing after him. You sprint through the forest, the warm summer air thick and humid around you. Each footfall is muffled by the dense undergrowth, but the occasional snap of a twig or crunch of leaves marks your frenzied pace. Moonlight filters through the dense canopy, casting ghostly shadows that dance along the forest floor, creating an ever-shifting maze of light and dark.
Your breath comes in quick, controlled bursts, each inhale filling your lungs with the earthy scent of the forest. Adrenaline surges through your veins, sharpening your senses. The rhythmic pounding of your heart in your chest matches the rapid beat of your footsteps. Ahead, you can just make out the faint silhouette of Noaya, his panicked movements betraying his desperation.
Branches claw at your clothes and face, but you push through, eyes locked on your target. The thrill of the chase ignites every nerve, propelling you forward with a singular focus. Suguru’s presence is a constant just behind you, his footsteps a steady reminder of the competition driving you both. You can hear his breaths, steady and calculated, mirroring your own.
The path twists and turns, the bamboo growing thicker, creating a claustrophobic tunnel. You duck and weave, dodging low-hanging branches and vaulting over fallen logs. The forest floor is uneven, riddled with roots and hidden pitfalls, but your reflexes are sharp, your movements instinctual.
The thrill, the excitement, the danger—it all converges in this moment. You are a predator in your element, and your prey is within reach. The bamboo forest seems to blur around you, time stretching and contracting with each heartbeat. This is what you live for, the ultimate test of skill and nerve, the ultimate game of life and death.
Just as you’re about to close the distance, your fingertips brushing the fabric of Noaya’s shirt, he whirls around with surprising speed. The moonlight catches the gleam of his hunting knife as it arcs through the air. Instinct takes over, and you try to dodge, but the blade slices across your palm, leaving a hot, stinging line of red in its wake.
For a split second, time seems to slow. You see the wild desperation in Noaya’s eyes, the way his chest heaves with exertion and fear. But there’s no pain, only a white-hot fury that floods your veins, fueling your next move.
Your grip tightens around the hilt of your own knife, slick with blood but steady. The cut on your palm feels like a mere scratch compared to the surge of adrenaline that courses through you. With a fierce snarl, you lunge forward, using the momentum to drive Noaya back a step.
He stumbles, his confidence faltering as he realizes the severity of his mistake. You don’t give him a chance to recover. You move with a predatory grace, every muscle coiled and ready to strike. The forest around you fades into a blur of green and shadow, all your focus locked on the man in front of you.
Noaya swings wildly, his movements frantic and uncoordinated. You sidestep his attacks with practiced ease, your fury giving you a sharp, clear edge. The scent of blood mingles with the earthy aroma of the forest, and your pulse pounds in your ears like a war drum.
You close the distance again, this time with a calculated precision. Your free hand shoots out, grabbing his wrist and twisting it until the knife clatters to the ground. Noaya yelps in pain, his eyes widening in terror. The tables have turned, and he knows it.
Your injured hand, still bleeding, clamps down on his shoulder with a vice-like grip. You lean in close, your breath hot against his ear. “Nice try,” you hiss, the fury in your voice making him shudder. “But it’s over.”
With a swift, brutal motion, you plunge your knife into his chest. The blade sinks into flesh with a sickening thud, and Noaya's eyes widen in shock and agony. Blood spurts from the wound, hot and sticky, spraying across your face in a macabre mist. The initial strike is met with a gasp, a desperate, choking sound that fuels the savage fire within you.
A wicked grin spreads across your face, the thrill of dominance electrifying your senses. You pull the knife out, feeling the resistance of tissue and bone, and then plunge it in again, and again. Each thrust is accompanied by a wet, squelching sound, a symphony of carnage that drowns out the world around you. Blood flows freely, pooling at your feet and soaking into the earth.
Noaya’s body jerks and spasms with each stab, his strength fading with every violent assault. His once panicked eyes grow dull, the life draining from them as you continue your relentless attack. The coppery tang of blood fills the air, mingling with the scent of the forest, creating a heady mixture that makes your pulse race even faster.
You lose yourself in the rhythm of the violence, the way your muscles strain and flex with each plunge of the knife. Blood splatters across your face and clothes, warm and viscous, painting you in the evidence of your victory. Your grin widens, a feral expression of triumph and fury.
Amidst your frenzied stabbings, Suguru places a hand on your shoulder. "I think—" he begins, but when you turn around to face him he immediately shuts up.
Your eyes are wide, pupils contracted like a deranged predator. Your hair flows wildly in the wind as you grab Suguru's throat with your bloody hand, smearing the crimson on his skin and pressing him against a tree.
"This woman-killer fucker is mine." You seethe.
His dick strains against his cargo pants waistband. You look divine.
“ Of course, All yours baby.” He coos.
~
Geto Suguru would be lying if he said that watching you tear apart that woman-killer wasn't the hottest thing he had ever seen.
To Suguru, you looked divine. The moonlight accentuated the sharp angles of your face, casting shadows that danced across your blood-splattered skin. Your eyes, wild with the remnants of fury, glowed with an unearthly intensity. The contrast of crimson against your complexion made you seem otherworldly, a dark goddess of vengeance. Suguru couldn’t tear his eyes away, mesmerized by the raw, primal beauty you exuded in that moment.
The walk back to your hotel was silent, but not because you were soaked in blood or because he felt awkward. More like it was because the only think he could think to say is “You are so fucking hot.”
Now here he is, twiddling his thumbs as he stands outside of your hotel door, trying to think of the right thing to say to you because god he needs to see your face one last time before he goes to bed.
He raises his hand to knock, but before he can, the door swings open. You stand there, your hair wet and smelling faintly of vanilla. You’ve clearly just come out of the shower. A tank top clings to your damp skin, and sports shorts hug your thighs. His eyes widen slightly, and he gulps, struggling to keep his composure.
No bra.
The sight makes his mouth go dry.
"Just checking to see if everything is good," he says, nodding toward your bandaged hand.
You feel yourself fidget in your place and you try to flash a small smile but your emotions betray you. What if you freaked him out? What he saw back there, what you did back there, that was you, the raw you. Behind all the layers of kind smiles and pleasantries, in many ways, you were no different than an animal, consumed by your predatory instincts. You wouldn't blame him if he never contacted you again after this. Shit, did you just fuck up everything?
His presence fills the doorway, and you’re acutely aware of the tension between you two.
“Yeah, everything’s fine,” you reply, shifting your weight from one foot to the other. “Thanks for asking.”
His eyes flicker down to your hand, then back up to meet yours. “How’s the hand?” he asks, genuine concern in his voice.
You hold it up and wiggle your fingers slightly. “It’ll heal. No big deal.”
Silence fills the void between you two and you clear your throat, searching for something to say to break the awkward silence, but he beats you to it.
“Mind if I come in?” he asks, a smirk playing on his lips as he leans against the doorframe. “Or are you planning to keep all the fun out here in the hallway?”
You roll your eyes, though you can’t help the small smile tugging at your lips. “Sure, come in. But I warn you, it’s a mess.”
“I’m sure I can handle it,” he quips, stepping inside. His eyes scan the room, taking in the organized chaos. Bandages and clothes are scattered around the floor and he doesn't miss the splatter of blood on the white sheets of the hotel bed. After a moment, Suguru turns around and takes a step closer to you, like he’s examining you.
You tilt your head slightly, letting a smirk play on your lips. "So, now that I’ve won the bet, what do I get?"
He chuckles, the sound low and smooth, as he takes another step closer, closing the distance between you. "I was wondering when you’d bring that up."
You arch an eyebrow, trying to keep your composure despite the way he’s looking at you, like you’re the most fascinating thing he’s ever seen. "Well? I’m waiting. What’s my prize?"
Suguru stops just inches from you. "I don’t know," he quips, "What do you want?"
You let out a short laugh, though it’s clear you’re testing him now. "That’s a big question."
Suguru's eyes darken slightly, his playful demeanor shifting into something more serious, more intense. He leans in just a fraction, his breath warm against your skin. "Try me."
The tension between you two is palpable, electric. You’re the first to break the silence, your voice quieter now, almost hesitant. "I want," you pause, averting your gaze from Suguru’s hawkish one. “I want to know if I scared you.” The question slips out before you can stop it, your bravado faltering as doubt creeps in.
Suguru blinks, then a slow smile spreads across his face. "Scare me?" He repeats, as if the idea itself is laughable. He steps even closer, forcing you to take a step back until the backs of your knees hit the edge of the bed. "Scare me?” He repeats again. “You didn’t scare me," he continues, his voice low and sincere. "You… captivated me. I have never, and I mean never, seen something so magnificent as what you did. And that's saying a lot because I've done a shit ton of magnificent things.”
You sit down on the bed, more out of necessity than choice, as he looms over you. Your heart is pounding in your chest, and you feel a mix of emotions—relief, curiosity, and something much more dangerous.
"What are you doing?" you ask, your voice barely above a whisper as he leans in, his hands resting on either side of you, trapping you in place.
He smiles, a slow, almost wicked grin that sends shivers down your spine. "Well, I thought I might kiss you now, you know, after telling you how magnificent you are.” He tilts his head. “Is that a bad idea?"
Your breath catches in your throat as the weight of his words sinks in. You forget to breathe.
You finally find your voice, though it’s a bit shakier than you’d like. "That depends…"
"On?" He asks, his face inching closer to yours, his gaze locked onto your lips.
"On how good you are at it," you murmur.
He doesn’t need any more encouragement. Suguru closes the remaining distance, his lips capturing yours in a kiss that’s as intense as it is tender. It’s a slow, deliberate connection, his hands moving to cradle your face as if you’re something precious, something worth savoring.
The kiss deepens, and all the tension that had been building between you two finally snaps, leaving nothing but raw desire in its wake. You respond in kind, your hands gripping the front of his shirt, pulling him closer as if you can’t get enough.
When you finally pull apart, both of you are breathless, and the world seems to have shrunk down to just the two of you in this moment. Suguru’s forehead rests against yours, and he smiles, a real, genuine smile that you can feel in your bones.
"So," he says, his voice husky and low. "How was that?"
You laugh softly, still trying to catch your breath. "Not bad," you admit, your fingers running through his black hair. "Not bad at all."
"Good," he replies, his lips brushing against yours in a whisper of a kiss. "Because I plan on doing it again."
Suguru’s lips are on yours again before you can even catch your breath, this time more insistent, more demanding. He’s not asking for permission anymore; he’s claiming what he wants, and it makes your head spin. The kiss deepens as his tongue slips past your lips, exploring your mouth with a slow, deliberate intensity that sends a shiver down your spine. You can taste him—warm, intoxicating—and you find yourself leaning into his lips, craving more.
His hand, warm and firm, slides down your side, tracing the curve of your waist before coming to rest between your thighs. The touch is electrifying, sending a jolt of sensation through you, and you gasp against his mouth, your heart pounding in your chest.
But it’s too much, too fast. Your mind races, and you instinctively pull back, breaking the kiss. “Wait,” you murmur, your voice breathless, “I dont know if we should….” You avert your gaze and turn your head toward the wall but Suguru grabs your chin, forcing you to look right into his hazel eyes. Then, he dips his head to whisper in your ear.
“Aw come one Y/n” He grazes your earlobe with his teeth. “I’ve been on my best behavior, a good boy,” Suguru pauses to deliver a soft kiss to your temple. “I've been waiting, waiting ever since I met you in that cage to do this. Don't I deserve a reward for my patience?”
You thickly gulp as he rubs the sides of your neck with his lips.
“I’ve been-” He kisses your jaw. “Such a-” he kisses his way up to your mouth. “Good boy.”
You cave.
As his words sink in, you feel your resolve crumbling, the weight of his desire pressing down on you in the most intoxicating way. Before you can even process what’s happening, Suguru's strong arms wrap around you, lifting you off the bed with effortless ease. His grip is firm but gentle, as if he's afraid of breaking you, and you can't help but let out a soft gasp as he lifts you off the bed and up so your head rests on the plush hotel pillow. His eyes lock onto yours, dark with intent, and you feel your breath hitch as the world narrows down to just the two of you. The room is filled with the sound of your breathing, heavy and uneven, mingling with the quiet rustle of sheets as he leans over you.
“I know you have been thinking about this too.” He coos. Suguru’s hands move with a deliberate slowness, as if savoring the moment. His fingers curl around the hem of your tank top, and with a slow, deliberate motion, he begins to lift it. The cool air hits your skin as he pulls the fabric up and over your head, exposing you to his hungry gaze. But before you can feel self-conscious, his lips are on your newly exposed skin, pressing gentle kisses along your collarbone, his warm breath fanning over your skin.
“Gorgeous,” he murmurs between kisses, his voice filled with awe and reverence. “Just so gorgeous.”
His hands are on your shorts next, tugging them down your hips with the same careful slowness, as if he’s unwrapping the most precious gift. As the fabric slips down your legs, he trails kisses along the newly exposed skin, his lips brushing against your thighs, your knees, your calves, until the shorts are discarded on the floor.
Now you’re lying before him in just your underwear, and the way he looks at you makes your heart pound. His eyes are dark and intense, filled with a hunger that makes your entire body flush with heat. “You’re gorgeous,” he repeats, his voice thick with emotion. “Just so damn gorgeous.”
Suguru straightens up slightly, his hands moving to the hem of his own shirt. In one fluid motion, he pulls it over his head and tosses it aside, revealing his bare chest. The sight of him makes your breath catch—his body is lean and athletic, muscles defined and sculpted from years of discipline and training. Tattoos cover his skin in an elaborate tapestry. He’s handsome, impossibly so, and the sight of him like this, just inches away, makes your pulse quicken.
He doesn’t stop there. His fingers move to the waistband of his sweatpants, and he slides them down, revealing more of his skin, his strong legs, until he’s kneeling before you in just his boxers. The fabric clings to him in a way that leaves little to the imagination, and you can’t help but stare, mesmerized by the sheer physicality of him.
Suguru catches your gaze, a small, knowing smile tugging at his lips. “Something catches your eye princess?”
You nod, “Yes. You. All of you.” Your eyes tracing every line and curve of his body. He’s more than just handsome—he’s breathtaking, a perfect combination of strength and beauty that leaves you feeling weak in the best way possible.
He leans down again, his body hovering over yours, his lips brushing against your ear as he whispers, “Good, wouldn't want you to be disappointed.”
With that, he captures your lips in a heated kiss, his hands trailing down your sides, touching, feeling, exploring.
You are too lost in the kiss not to notice his hands slipping under your underwear and making their way to your dripping cunt, and when they do, you jump at the feeling of his index finger tracing your slit.
"Gotta get you ready baby.?" Suguru hums and you shake you head vigorously.
"No please Sugu~, I can take it."
You don't have to tell him twice.
In one fluid motion Suguru tears off your underwear, lays you on your back and positions himself between your legs.
"Been waiting to do this for so long," he murmurs as he pulls down his boxers and whips out his dick. You thickly gulp at the sight, you could've guessed he was big not this big, could he even fit in you? A white bead of precum dribbled from his pretty pink tip and down his length and he uses the liquid to stroke himself in a few fluid motions.
You could hear your heart in your ears and adrenaline coursed through your veins at rocket fire speed. The need in between your legs was too much, it was clouding your head and twisting your stomach so tight you almost felt sick. You jolt when his fat tip bumps into your clit; collecting your juices before pressing against your quivering hole.
"Suguru please~" You whine and nearly miss the way his ears go bright red at your words
"I know baby, I know. Don't worry, lift your hips for me love?”
You oblige and immediately when you do so you're struck with the feeling of his length spreading you so helplessly wide and his tip smashing against something which must be your cervix you think. It’s painful, but in the pain is so much pleasure. He presses his forehead against yours as he slides into you, gripping the sheets with his supporting hand as your hot, wet entrance swallows his cock. Instinctively, you're cunt squeezed around the foreign intrusion, trying to push it out, making Suguru let out a low groan of his own and pushing even deeper into you.
“F-fuck I can feel you doing it to me,” he said hoarsely.
His fingers gently press into the skin of your hip, guiding and steadying you as he pulls back and thrusts into you. The sudden friction and collision with your G-spot knocks the wind out of your lungs. Ticklish pleasure courses through your veins and you immediately throw your head back against the wall as Suguru thrusts into you.
"Hnghh, s-so good~~" You whine. It was dizzying, the curvature of his dick digging itself against your g-spot, scraping against your vaginal walls every time he backed his hips up.
Simultaneously, his other hand sought yours, finding it with a purposeful tenderness. His fingers intertwined with yours, locking them together in a grip that was both a clasp and a caress.
You dont even realize that your eyes are closed until Suguru whispers into your ear.
“Come on baby, open those pretty eyes, look at me.”
You do as he says and when you do you feel your heart thud in your chest. Suguru’s eyes were fixated completely on you, how you were reacting, as his hips were continuously slamming into your body as if it were clockwork. The sight alone had your walls clamping down on him, earning a groan from the base of his chest.
Suddenly, the hand that had been intertwined with yours released its grip and began to rummage through Suguru’s discarded pants. Your breath hitched, eyes glazed over as you watched him retrieve a knife from his pocket, unsheathing it effortlessly with a flick of his finger. The sharp glint of the blade caught your attention from beneath Suguru’s body, even as he continued thrusting into you, not missing a beat.
Your body reacted instinctively, clenching at the sight, drawing a low, dark chuckle from Suguru.
“Hah, I knew it,” he said, his voice laced with a teasing edge as he brought the cold steel to the base of your throat. “You’re just a slut for knives, aren’t you?”
A moan escaped your lips, the sound betraying any chance of denial. Suguru took it as an admission, pressing the blade firmly against the skin of your throat as he angled his hips to hit even deeper inside you. The cool metal at your throat was electrifying, but it was his other hand, strong and unyielding, that sent a euphoric thrill coursing through you. His fingers flexed, tightening around your neck, the pressure intensifying.
It wasn’t just the air being cut off—it was the dizzying, intoxicating pleasure that came with it. The way his grip constricted, pushing you to the edge of control, ignited something raw inside. Every squeeze of his hand made your body burn hotter, a perfect balance between pain and pleasure, leaving you gasping for more.
What a primal dirty sight you where, being choked with a blade against your throat while fucked brutaly. Even the devil would clutch his rosaries.
"Were we doing it like this in your head baby?" Suguru grunts, his Adam apple bobs as he groans from the pleasure of how fucking heavenly your pussy feels. “Because we were doing it like this in mine.” Good? Try euphoric, how could he ever think his fist could substitute the wet squeeze of your cunt?
You can't even open your mouth to respond. The friction of his dick against your walls and the adrenaline from the knife is just too good and as his pace intensified, a dizzying warmth spread through you, filling every corner of your being with a euphoric haze. The sensation of being completely enveloped, utterly connected, sent electric flesh arrows of pleasure through your body, making your eyes flutter and roll back slightly in sheer bliss. Every motion Suguru makes, every time his fat tip collides with your cervix, leaves behind a trail of sparkling heat that seems to light you from within.
"Come on eyes on me when I fuck you baby~" Suguru releases his hold from your neck and snakes his fingers between your body , finding your clit and pressing down on the pearl back and forth with the pad of index finger. "Tell me how good you feel, tell me how badly you want to cum.
He doesn’t slow the ministrations on your clit for a second as he snaps his hips into you with primal vigor, your breasts bouncing from the brutality.
"So good Sugu!" You sob. You cant even open your eyes from the colors you're seeing behind your lids. Every time your pussy squeezes around him not only do bolts of pleasure shoot up your body but a ring of milky white cum forms around the base of his cock.
Suguru’s eyes are locked on how good you're taking him - the fat of his head has a hard time popping out with how greedy your cunny is being. He lets out a sharp moan at how wet you are on the inside.
"S-shit baby wanna feel you cum on me, been waiting so long." Suguru is not a whining man but here he is practically stumbling over his words. Fuck, he wants to keep himself inside you forever. He wants your kisses, your skin, your touch, your blood, your lips, to be his to claim until you die together. No one has seen, truly seen him, before you. You are what he thinks about when he wakes up, when he is eating, when he is plunging his knife into some worthless monkey. You are his goddess.
The world beyond this intimate cocoon of warmth and breath seemed distant, irrelevant. His gaze was locked with yours, deep and unwavering, a silent communication that tethered you through the mind numbing ecstasy.
Then, he reels his hips back and slams into you in a new angle that has your body jerking.
“Found it didn't I?” He breathes through a smile and pummels into you with vigor. And your about to disagree with him, insist that the feeling is too new and foreign to feel good when all of a sudden your body begins to shake and your head starts to feel fuzzy
And suddenly—you feel it. What you’ve been craving for and what you have seen in porn.
Its like all your body's energy centers are activating at once and your left utterly helpless to the feeling of tingling ecstasy wrapping your brain and stomach.
You dont know how to tell him that something is happening, not when the pleasure is too immense your barely breathing full breaths. But he understands once again the words you tried desperately to communicate.
“Do it baby. Cum. I’ll fill you up, and if it spills I'll fuck it back into you"
So you do.
Release washed over you in an all-encompassing wave, radiating out from your core to the very tips of your fingers and toes. It swept through you like a storm, leaving a trail of starbursts in its wake. Your body arched instinctively, clinging to Suguru as the wave crested, then gently, slowly, began to ebb.
“Ah, princess, please,” he moaned. “Be a good girl and take it all, yeah?”
Your fingers trailed up his shoulder, only to drag them back down his spine, nails biting into his skin as he buried himself deep inside you, releasing with a powerful shudder. His movements grew erratic, hips pressing yours firmly into the mattress as his hot breath skimmed across your neck, ragged and heavy.
The world outside fades away, leaving just the two of you in this moment, lost in each other, with nothing but the sound of your breathing and the feel of his touch to guide you.
The warmth of his cum spreads through your body with a shiver, and you can feel the liquid expanding against your walls while he kept you plugged and full of him. As you both floated back down from the heights of bliss, your breaths came easier, softer, the lingering aftershocks of pleasure pulsing gently through you.
"You're mine ok?" Suguru coos, and all you can do is dumbly nod.
"I'll die for you, I'll kill a thousand monkeys for you, i'll hold them down so you can cut our their eyes. Just stay by my side."
#jjk smut#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#geto x reader#getou x reader#geto x you#geto x reader smut#getou x you#getou smut#geto smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk fanfic#jjk x reader smut#jjk x you#jjk x y/n#kinktober
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Your posts are in an AI model
and then Tumblr decided to sell them to AI models.
Now, don't get me wrong, tumblr selling out the users to AI companies is bad, yes, they shouldn't do that. It sucks.
but don't lets get this confused: your posts were already in there. Tumblr selling them is about tumblr making some money and about the AI models having more exhaustive post collections. It's not about your posts being in an AI model, vs not being in one. That battle has already been lost.
Can you find your post on google? Then it's almost certainly in an AI model already. Think about it: These AI sites showed up before all the sites were making deals to sell their users' content, right? How do you think they built them in the first place?
They scraped the posts. Just like google and bing and such do when they build their search indexes.
It's a fundamental part of how the open web works: you want your posts on tumblr to be visible to users, right? You want them to be readable?* Like, look how much stuff broke when twitter changed their whole read-while-not-logged-in policy, ruining a bunch of thread links/NSFW links. And if it's visible, it's scrapable. That's what the AI models were built on.
I've done website scraping before (not for AI models, of course. I was doing search engines and website archival), this is just how it works. You hire a few relatively smart CS graduates and tell them "build me a scraper that'll give us a bunch of tumblr posts" and they go off for a month or two and come back with a database of a few billion posts, and you stuff that into your AI model. That's how they got all the deviantart and flickr and twitter and pinterest and so on posts. They didn't pay for them: they just took them.
They only ever pay for this shit because either:
they fucked up in such a way that the site might be able to sue them for taking rather than paying
They can buy them cheaper than they can finish taking them. Maybe they'd need to pay the CS grads for an extra month? well, that might be more expensive than just throwing the site a couple hundred thousand bucks.
ANYWAY: my point is, don't treat this "oh no tumblr is selling our posts to AI" like it's a big thing that might happen and it would be bad to happen. Yes, it's bad, tumblr shouldn't do this, this'll let AI models get continual updates of content for far easier than just scraping them would be, tumblr betrayed user trust, and so on...
but realistically, this is not a black and white matter of "if only tumblr didn't do this, then we'd be safe from AI models!"
Nope. We already lost that battle. I'm sorry, and it does suck, but that's just how it is. The avalanche has already started, it's too late for the pebbles to vote. * I'm assuming here that you don't run a private blog that's set to only followers or something. You'd be safer then, of course, but you're not really my target audience for this rant
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𝐨𝐥𝐝𝐞𝐫
→ premise: sometimes logan’s age showed more than it normally would and so just once you called him an old man, affectionally of course. Well he was determined to show you he wasn’t one.
→ pairing: logan howlett x fem!reader
→ warnings: smut | 18+, nicknames [baby, sweet girl, princess], daddy kink, both reader and logan use old man as a nickname, oral [f receiving], unprotected sex, established relationship, slight overstimulation.
→ a/n: the pictures/moodborad above are purely for vibes :) you can imagine any logan pretty much for this fic i think. this is mt first time writing logan so sorry if hes out of character and sorry for any mistakes this was written and proof read at 1am.
Logan wasn’t the type of man to be insecure about his age, his body and face didn’t necessarily show it like how it did on others obviously. He was well aware he was way older than you, he was much older than most people. His age showed more with his taste in music and movies, even in some of the outdated slang he frequently used.
You were currently laid up in your shared bed with Logan. You loved being curled up in his lap, your head resting on his chest cuddled up against him. A cigar nestled between Logan's lips, him periodically puffing out smoke. One of his arms lazily resting over your body holding you against him. An older movie was playing on the tv in the background, the volume was high enough for you to hear it, however you could hardly pay attention. Your mind was too lost in how domestic and old timey it all was, the feeling making your heart flutter.
“You know this was my favorite movie, well one of 'em used to watch it all the time” Logan's gruff voice breaks you from your train of thought.
You look up at your boyfriend and smile softly, his gaze fixated on the black and white images flashing across the screen. You chuckle softly and reach up towards his neck to thread your fingers through the hair at the base of his skull. An action that Logan has come to love and even crave on the days when life gets just a little too much.
“You're such an old man” your voice breaks his focus , it was teasing and full of affection as you said it. Logan could clearly hear it, and your statement was correct and didn't bother him, however he couldn't help the little plan forming in his head to mess with you. Shaking your head lightly you turn your attention back on the television.
“Ya’ wanna say that again sweet girl?” He leans his head down, all his attention now glued to you. His words came out almost mockingly instantly making your gaze snap back up to him. He grabs ahold of your chin so that your focus and your eyes stay on him. You knew that teasing tone of voice like the back of your hand by now and what it meant. It made the flutter in your heart drop to your stomach, his arm that was wrapped around your body tightens. You can feel him starting to grow harder against your thigh, making you squirm a bit in his grasp. You swallow hard, your voice suddenly caught in your throat. Logan watches as your pupils dilate and that sweet smell that he's become addicted to fills his nose, giving away your own growing arousal.
“Cause i'm thinkin’ you just called me old princess” He cocks his head to the side in a teasing manner, his lips breaking out in a smirk. Still not being able to find your words you shake your head ‘no’ causing him to chuckle deeply. “No? cause i think ya’ did baby, yeah i think you called me an old man” His words come out in almost a growl as he leans forward, pushing you down on your back. His body now perfectly nestled between your legs as he hovers over you, pinning you down with his weight. His large rough hands holding onto your hips, one slowly drifting and pushing up the t-shirt you had on. A t-shirt that looked an awful lot like the one he's been looking for all week.
“Maybe i did.. but you are an actual old man Logan, you’re much older than me baby” Finally finding your voice you attempt to explain yourself, though you knew he wasn't actually upset by your comment. His strained cock pressed against your clothed cunt being more than an indication of that. Your damp panties and his jeans doing nothing to stop him from feeling the way your pussy was throbbing already from his teasing.
“Yea? Well ima show you just what this old man can do huh” He questioned, barely giving you a moment to answer. Wasting no time he has your shirt pushed up revealing your bare tits and his other hand pulling your panties down your legs. Sliding down your body and the bed he slowly kisses down your exposed chest and stomach until his head has made it between your spread thighs. “Logan..” you whine softly, your eyes glued to his every move as you grow more impatient. A rush of cold air hits your lower half when he finally rids you of your soaked underwear.
That damn smirk not wavering from his face as he grabs ahold of your thighs and nearly growls when his tongue finally laps at your pussy. “Fuck i dont think i’ll ever get over just how fuckin’ good you taste baby” his words come out a bit mumbled as his face is buried between your folds. “Lo..” you whine in embarrassment at his statement. Your slick had coated his face in seconds, though it was clear he could care less, wrapping his lips around your clit and sucking. Even biting the nub softly causing your hips to buck up against his face, his scruffy facial hair rubbing your inner thighs. He groans against you and grips your legs tighter pulling you closer to his mouth.
“Daddy…fuck!” You gasp softly and moan at the sensation and tighten your thighs around his head, Logan's favorite thing was to feel your plush thighs squeeze his head. His adamantium skull being able to take the pressure. You can feel him smile against you at both the name and the action. “Atta girl, princess. Such a good girl for ya’ old man” he praises, his deep voice vibrating through your body.
Letting your clit go Logan pulls away for a moment, dropping his grip on one of your thighs as well to bring his hand and spread apart your lips. Leaning his head back a bit he spits on your pussy, his saliva sliding down to your throbbing hole. “Fuck she always looks so pretty sweet girl” he hums in approaval and admiration at your pussy. His eyes finally lift back up to your face, he takes note of your already blissed out look. “No cuming til I tell you baby, ya’ got it?” He questions, a small smile on his face that was covered in you.
“Yes daddy” you whine, your voice coming out a bit soft as you were taking the time he was giving you to catch your breath.
With a small smack to the side of your ass he dives his head back down, sticking his tongue out flat and licking a strip up the center of your cunt. Growling and burying his face between your legs again he laps and sucks at your clit and folds. Your hips having a mind of their own buck up against his mouth, nearly riding his face. His hips rutting up against the bed of their own accord as well, his precum now leaking through his boxers a bit. His cock straining against his jeans as wonton moans and whimpers leave your lips. Your eyes screwing shut in pleasure as his tongue every now and then pushes inside you and his nose nudges your swollen nub.
You could feel your climax quickly approaching, pushing your fingers through Logan's signature tufts of hair and pulling his face closer. “Fuck- Lo…Daddy please” you moan out pleading with your boyfriend to let you cum. He squeezed your thigh and groaned roughly against you, you knew that was his way of saying ‘not yet’. You whine and tug harder on his hair causing him to let out a small muffled moan. He pulls his face away a bit and with his hand that wasn't squeezing your leg he slips two fingers through your lips, collecting his spit and your slick together. Continuing his attack on your nearly now oversensitive clit he slides his thick soaked fingers inside you stretching you slowly. The rough pads of them instantly finding that spot deep inside you.
“Daddy I don't- uh shit! I don't know how much longer I can hold on, please Logannn!” You moan and whine out his name as your hips thrust back against his skilled fingers and rut against his face. Your high teetering on the edge as you try your hardest to hold it back. “Cum baby, cum on daddy's face princess” he commands and in an instant your body responds and allows your climax to hit you head on.
A string of curses leave Logan's lips as he laps at your cum as it leaks out of you, broken whines and small moans leave yours as he draws out your climax a bit longer. Finally emerging from between your legs, his lips swollen and pink, the whole lower half of his face covered in yours and his combined mess. Heat floods your face a bit at the sight, though your boyfriends still got that smirk glued to his pretty face. The dynamic of you being nearly entirely naked and him still entirely clothed caused an ache to settle back in your core as if Logan hadn’t just made you cum.
He makes his way bad up your body, quickly pulling off his shirt as well as finally pulling yours up and over your head, definitely leaving you entirely naked now. Leaning down, pressing his crotch right up against yours, his clothed bulging cock nudging open your wet and sticky folds. His lips hover over yours as his hand slides up your side, the other brushing over your breast before it’s wrapped around your neck and pinning you back against the bed. He squeezes your neck softly making you let out a whimper.
“You were saying baby?” His voice comes out deep and a bit hoarse as he questions your previous comment again. “Not callin’ me an old man now are ya’ sweet girl, noo cause you cant even talk” he mocks, a small smile on his face as he rocks his hips up against your pussy, the rough material of his jeans stimulating your abused bundle of nerves setting it off again. Your slick creates a wet spot on his jeans the more he grinds his dick against you.
“Won’t do it again i swear daddy, you're not an old man” you whimper softly as your hands grab at his arms and hands, your fingers rubbing at his knuckles where his claws rip through the skin. When his fly zipper brushes your clit you let out a short moan and move to grab at the waist of his jeans tugging, trying to get him to take them off. Tears lightly coat your eyelashes as you bat them at Logan. He scoffs softly and shakes his head at you as he lets go of your neck to undo his belt and the buttons to his jeans, pulling off his belt and jeans. You watch with a sparkle of excitement in your eyes, your chest heaving in impatience, hands wandering his body and rubbing over his muscly arms and board chest. He tugs his boxers down his thighs as he grabs your legs, wrapping your thighs around his waist. His tip leaking precum is redden and twitching as he rubs it through your lips before pushing at your hole.
“Come on princess, apologize for it” he goes painfully slow as he pushes inside you. “Apologize nicely for calling daddy an old man” he grins and brings his hand up to your boob, brushing his rough thumb over your nipple. You gasp softly and whine, wiggling your hips both in protest and to try and get him inside you faster.
Realizing he won't keep going further til you apologize, you give in. Pulling him down and closer, you wrap your arms around his neck and look into his eyes. “I'm really sorry for calling you an old man Lo, i didn't mean it i promise. You're not an old man daddy” you whine and brush your lips softly against his. “Oh fuck, you’re so sweet on me baby i love it” he growls and thrusts inside you hard as his lips crash against yours. You moan out loudly the sound muffled in Logan's mouth as his hips snap against yours. His cock thrusting deep inside you, hitting that spongy spot making your brain go foggy. Kissing you hard and passionately as his hands roam your body not being able to stop himself from touching you everywhere, you're all his anyway.
“My sweet, sweet princess, takin’ it so good from your old man huh?” He groans and presses his forehead against yours as your hips bounce off his. All you can do is frantically nod and mumble and whine about how good he feels and say yes daddy. Your nails digging into his back and running through his hair.
Logan may be an old man but he was your old man and he definitely didnt fuck like one. He knew how to keep up with his sweet little young girlfriend.
→ a/n: hope you enjoyed my loves, PLEASE SEND ME LOGAN REQUESTS< MY REQUESTS ARE OPEN AND IM CURRENTLY OBESSED WITH THIS MAN
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