#this wasn't worth what I saw
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if you struggle with mental health, one piece of advice i would genuinely give you is learn to knit.
or crochet: something repetitive to do with your hands, assuming you're capable of it. if you're like me and learnt to knit as a kid but let it lie fallow for a long time, it may be that starting a large, simple project (for me it was a cloak, but a blanket could work too) gets you back into it. or maybe doing something smaller, idk. i personally found socks really hard for a while because they felt smaller than my cloak but weren't getting Done quick enough for me. as i've sped up i find it more interesting to knit socks.
regardless, a repetitive task is great for emotional regulation (also see: autistic stimming), and something that you can look at and go hey i've done something, unlike simply using a fidget toy, can also help to pick your mood up when the brain is being cruel.
it's also useful as a conversation starter or distracter if you don't know what to talk about. if you're wanting to talk to older people also you're more likely to reel them in with knitting (i work better with older people, and 99% of people who ask what i'm knitting are older than me). it also gives you the opportunity to not make eye contact because you're busy knitting, even if you're still carrying on a conversation. if you're absolutely stuck for conversation you can count your stitches and people might stop bothering you.
if you have trouble focusing without doing something with your hands, you can knit! i knit a lot in church, and it helps me to focus on what's being said.
i probably have more reasons you should pick up knitting, but i can't recall them right now, so yeah.
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wife · 13 days ago
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u ever see a post on tumblr that has thousands of notes and it's so banal but it's posted by one of the Tumblr Favourites so everyone reblogged it and got it popular fsr. like. if i (or anyone else normal) had posted that it would have never been reblogged it's a mediocre post. but because it's posted by someone popular it gets thousands of notes & then by tht point ppl get mind controlled by it having thousands of notes and believe it's an interesting post to reblog. am i the only one tht thinks about this
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moyazaika · 1 month ago
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will you appear again before Christmas?🥲
YES HI!!!! WOWEE sorry for being away longer than i intended! estranged family member showed up on my front door after 18 yeARS of no contact?!?!? went to bali and lost my pasSPORT?!?!?! failed my driver's TEST!?!?!?!
#life
#i've been writing a lot!#so i will post something soon#i missed u all and thank you to the people who checked in with me#it meant so much more than you know :') <3#tumblr has become such a creative outlet for me and retreat for me overtime but i didn't realise how comfortable i got here till now#taking time away has also cemented my own writing style#for a while i was trying too hard to force/fit into what i saw was popular in the yandere niche (art under capitalism xyz competition xyz)#now i've fully embraced what i can write#like to write#and want to be known for writing#so yes it's been an interesting end to an otherwise hellish year. honour roll second yr in a row so it all feels worth it now but jfc#i've never crashed out so much before in one year#so yeah! if u read all that ur a legend#just yapping abt what's been on my mind#consciously reading has also challenged me with how i want to extend my own writing#as if i wasn't ambitious enough bye#but i really hope that 2025 is#above all else#the year of unbroken promises#i don't want to promise things i can't deliver#but i still want you guys to be excited for what i do put out!!#so lesson learned; do not make a series masterlist/seasonal event if all the chapters or stories aren't pre-written out alr :')#2025 writing goals just bcuz i saw people do this with their reading so why not with writing?#1) begin and finish a multi part series (more than 5 chapters! i live for the longform)#2) clear out my inbox fully. i'm at 40ish asks so this isn't too crazy of a goal imo#i'll c ya guys soon tho! thanks for sticking around <3<3<3 love u all#excited for what's next :)
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masterfuldoodler · 1 year ago
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If half alive has 1000 fans I am one of them. If half alive has 1 fan, I am that fan
#text#august rambles#this is brought to you by seeing someone's review for them. and saying they didn't like the ep because it was standard#and that now not yet was better but had a bunch of poor songs. some of them bad#they even said still feel wasn't good because it was appealing too much to 'teen angst'#anyway i couldn't read the rest i had to leave#it was too painful i like the music too much we viewed it from different standpoints ack#i see a lot of people saying half alive is knock off twenty one pilots and like i see what they're saying. they are similar but#why does that mean its a knock off. what if they are just similar. half alive is clearly doing they're own thing. they're not copying them#maybe. that is just what that band is good at doing! the same as twenty one pilots. just cuz twenty one pilots came first doesn't mean#they own the scene. (you can argue they're better at they're music but if you're gonna do that make sure you're comparing the early stuff)#anyway rant about this because. i really like half alive and just dsbkncjnvb you don't need to be a fan#you don't need to think they're awesome. you can have an opinion outside of mine#but please be nice. and remember. it's Your opinion it's not Truth. if you don't like the song. you don't like it#if you think the repetition is boring. its not for you. if the 'angst' is stupid. its not for you. if the song doesn't hold weight.#it's not for you. the artist wrote this. and worked with other people to publish it#clearly they cared and other people saw worth in it. and like!! the fact that they're not big name also means they Can't get away with like#stupid filler stuff. they don't have enough of a name they gotta impress#idk i care too much. i see things like this and im just. ugh. it feels pretentious#half alive
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dearmrsawyer · 9 months ago
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on the loose live my beloved
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averlym · 1 year ago
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which is gayer? SIX or Adamandi (real)
adamandi
#like. gotta break it to you. one of these musicals is canonically lgbtq and it's not the one where women sing about their dead husband yknow#like. idk what to say! but <shrugs>#ask me stuff???#must say the fandoms are really quite different. i'm quite fascinated by the dynamics tbh#also i realise a lot of the queendom(? forgot that was the name for a hot sec) go mad about women in shiny pretty costumes slaying#but also hmmmm adamandi is very much gender for me.( for all the characters. but specifically vincent and beatrix)#and the thing about queerness is it literally gets woven into the narrative. and it's Obvious.#smth about canonical lgbt+ rly is just. it hits. the representation is real? as opposed to fandom interpretations only#(and like... i love fandom interpretations and when people can see a new side to the character that they feel seen in!!!)#(but having it be in the original content is just... yeah... you do feel kinda especially seen)#watching adamandi was a bit like first watching firebringer for me? like except for sexuality it was gender o.O#firebringer was the first musical i saw with a canon wlw couple. and like i'd known that girls could like girls for a while but#there was the small italicised oh moment where i was like ''this is actually real'' <it's maybe worth noting i wasn't very active on soc me#about consuming things other than content. so i wasn't very exposed to the community at large. so representation in media mattered!!>#similarly it's been a while since then and both online and irl i've found people who are more open about it and accepting. i've been very#very lucky in that sense. to have specific irl friendgroups where we're all out to each other <based on sentiment? i think most of us#including me. aren't openly out irl> ... and online i'm really glad to have friends who Get It and are similar to me. but the representatio#... !!! omg hsnfjkfgdsdsghf yknow?? the representation in adamandi really got me. the pronouns thing especially.#and because the core source material is Like That.. existing fandom is all accepting already. so bonus points i guess#sorry i have turned this silly little question into a reflection prompt.. but. thoughts.#[wow. on further retrospection i've never outed myself at all online either people just saw the ship art and Inferred and]#[to be fair they were Not Wrong. idk. tumblr avvy is very vastly different from irl me but neither of us feel comfortable stating it so-]#[also worthy mention of the musicals fandom that exposed me to the whole concept of lgbtq+ being a Thing at the ripe young age of 14]#[what a way to discover it. really. i say this with extreme fondness. conversely i have friends who decided through genshin or anime so idk#<i'm aware of the diverse casting thing for six!! i think it's very cool!! i also realise the show plot doesn't really have much to do w it
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drakyns · 1 month ago
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𝗪𝗛𝗘𝗡 𝗢𝗡𝗘 𝗙𝗜𝗧𝗦 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗡𝗔𝗠𝗘 . . .
a brief explanation of the origins of hiccup's real name (håkan) and how he came to accept it. it is believed that in old norse customs, the use of bynames was common; they could be praising or condescending, sometimes even used without one's given name, rewriting them. the collection of many bynames and honorary titles could indicate glory, fame and endless spirit.
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ㅤhe was born a moon cycle too early, already too anxious to live. a wee thing, like his mother said: small, fragile, almost the size of a cat. he fought against his own little lungs, deafening all around the crib with his cries. his father was proud, for he squeezed his finger, and it hurt. he thought him a warrior, in a hurry to leave footsteps into the world. when stoick held him, he raised him to soak in dawning moonlight. as if smiling down on their family, thor sent thunder cutting through the skies... or was it a dragon roaring in the distance? the chronicles won't say for certain. blinded by promises only he could hear or perhaps projecting much of his own greens in his son's eyes, his father wanted to name him quickly, before the sun reached its peak. so soon, ausa vatni bathed his forehead, welcoming him in the arms of the chieftain, claiming him heir and part of the tribe. the storytellers sang the name chosen by the great and the vast: håkan, and the storytellers etched his runes so the gods would not forget his calling: ᛡᛆᚴᛆᚿ.
ㅤwhile some would call it arrogance, love was what made stoick not name his child ulf, bjørn, toke, arne, njal or any derivation from animals or fables. the name was a promise: his son was exalted by his father, the leader of the pack, and his mother, the queen, chosen by the very heavens, born to lead and rule, destined for greatness in all his might, a warrior in the making, strongest of them all. first of his name, his son was the mark of a better tomorrow to come, according to his father's speeches. a worthy heir for his legacy and tribe! no father could be more proud, more excited for grey days to come. his name, noble and princely, served to warn all others of his to-be imposing and towering presence. all expected him to be like stoick.
ㅤneedless, thus it is to say that, as his child grew, he did not seem to fit in the pledged shoes. he got sick often and was scrawny, body petit like a branch, trembling against harsh winds. clumsy he was on his feet, far too enamoured with stupid fables and childish wonders. he always let his prey escape and did poorly in sports. barely had a competitive spirit. he could not hold much of his drinking, either. sailors called him a bad luck charm, and gatherers avoided his son. he did not seem to have an ounce of charisma: he stuttered in shiness, fumbling on his words. his byname was soon fixed to be hixti inn (hiccup man, hiccup). so fitting it was that even his father adopted it. hence, ᛡᛆᚴᛆᚿ was replaced by ᛡᛁᚴᛍᛐᛁ ᛁᚿᚿ in young royal stories. hiccup embraced it, for he was hiccup, and not håkan. at least as a mere hiccup he did not feel so pressured. or that is what he believed, at least. sometimes, though, fate is a funny trickster thing.
ㅤ[ ... ]ㅤwhen the dragons were tamed and brought home, he showed himself bigger than hiccup or håkan, for he was both, neither and more. he stopped flinching or hesitating when someone called him by his given exalted name, and he smiled whenever his father would ruffle his hair in pride then. his chest was bigger now, heart more daring and outwards. thanks to his works and ambition, he collected other bynames so legends to prose: smiðr (ᛍᛘᛁᚦᛦ, great smith, metal maker), draig kyn (ᛑᚱᛆᛁᚵ ᚴᚤᚿ, dragon-kinned, of fire and scales) and hersir (ᛡᛂᚱᛍᛁƦ, chieftain and loved guardian). even the elders gave him honourary titles: first rider, cloud chaser, pride of berk, berk's shield, blade cutter, heart and soul of dragon. though ghosts of feeling unworthy still burdened his nightmares and shoulders, he carried himself tall like his father taught him: he needed to try and be that great, that brave and that selfless. for his father was proud at the table of the kings, smiling down on him, and he watched as every step of his son now left bold footsteps behind. for he was first of his name and unlike all before him.
håkan, hiccup, hersir, smiðr, draig kyn. he wears them all on his coat.
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forcebookish · 2 months ago
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and can i just say that i hate her character development lol
#you know everyone talks about how she spent 1000 years torturing men and how :( mean :( that was of her#but she also spent 1000 years seeing how shitty men treat women and how COMMON it was how UNORIGINAL how IT WAS THE SAME THING OVER AND OVE#and when she becomes powerless she ends up falling for one of the shittier ones#and this is her like. hashtag NotAllMen lesson#even though the whole POINT of her powers was exacting REVENGE as in DOING BAD THINGS TO MEN WHO HAD DONE BAD THINGS#her mistrust of men as people who could do inflict the kind of cruelty that she punished wasn't baseless or even discriminatory#and yet somehow after 1000 years she's like actually i'm SUPER lonely and if i don't have a man i'll go crazy even though i know this guy i#not only capable of fucking me over he ACTUALLY FUCKED SOMEONE OVER I SAW IT HAPPEN#i just????????????? i do not get it#if she had fallen for someone who she thought COULD NEVER HURT HER who was GENUINELY someone she thought she would never have to use her#powers on when she had them who proved that the risk was worth it with the right guy i would have understood#INSTEAD she chooses the guy that she KNOWS doesn't know how to act right oh my god#i mean WHAT#idk maybe i'm remembering wrong maybe that was part of the logic like well i know you did this but if that's the worst you can do i'll just#drown you or whatever#like a devil you know type of thing#IDK I DON'T LIKE IT I DON'T LIKE ANYTHING TO DO WITH XANDER#buffyverse liveblog#my caps
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the-physicality · 4 months ago
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i do think, aside from mercury bias, if bg had been in all season she would have been all wnba, first or at least second. i think people undervalue her because of the rebounding but she is 1000% the worst officiated player in the league, on both sides of the court. so the fact that she's been able to have the performance that she had is incredible, and that she didn't get the acknowledgment really just underscores how much people take what she does for granted.
#i saw something interesting that kim milky basically has her players specialize and so they come out of college less well rounded#exhibit a angel's shooting vs rebounding#and i didn't watch bg in college so maybe i'm totally wrong on this but maybe rebounding just wasn't he job#and then i saw on reddit or something that maybe because she is so poorly officiated she'd get called for too many fouls on rebounding#for it to be worth it#and while i understand the value of rebounding really i do the mercy's problem wasn't that they weren't trying#well sometimes it was but it was that their whole system wasn't designed for it#if you have 4 players on the perimeter to space and shoot 3#you're going to hope they go in and run the floor instead#teams that rebound well dedicate bodies and time to rebounding#and i believe that it was a conscious choice the merc made to not do that#and if you look at old merc games they struggled with rebounding then too#i actually will have more to say about this in the future but the mercury's style of play has lived and died with dt's style for 20 years#the mercury have the most 100 point games of any franchise#and they are responsible for most of the 200 point total scores across the league#ie their fast break and bad defense lol#and while it's not entirely true - she is not responsible for every result they've ever had - i don't think you get westhead's style of pla#to work without her talent and the penny cappie dt trio in 2006#or at least it isn't successful and maybe doesn't change the pace of play in the league the way it did#it's also interesting that if the lottery draw goes differently in 2006 and merc have the first pick do they get seimone or do they stick#cappie? i think they stick with cappie bc they needed a true pg and from what i've seen seimone is a 2/3#and i don't think dt becomes the player the league knows without having a true pg [vs her playing point]#the thing is dt can play point better than most people but i think she plays better when she has someone else there to help#and her talking about oh i should've won mvp in 2006 [when i dropped 40] [lisa leslie won that year]#and in 2014 [best team ever] [maya moore won that year]#you look at the stats and there is for sure an argument to be made there#but it all comes back to post players#and i know wikipedia says maya is a power forward but she seems like more of a 3 sometimes? i haven't watched her enough#but i don't think dt can win mvp in 2009 without that team specifically#which means [and this is my theory of life] that everything happens the way it has to happen for you to end up where you are today
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zincbot · 1 year ago
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the portraits changing in act 3.
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halfbakedmuon · 11 months ago
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How do people do this career thing. I'm gonna cry
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iimexpensiive · 2 years ago
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So, I am debating this...but what if it wasn't JUST the scriptures that started making Wukong spiral? I'll probably post it more in depth later BUT what if another reason was Tripitaka gave-up?
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dimiclaudeblaigan · 2 years ago
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The worst thing about my brain being an autopilot grammar nazi is that every single time I see people misuse “it’s” and “its” as well as apostrophe placements is that I don’t want to be rude and correct people... but my brain still is like UGH THIS IS THE WORST.
“It’s” and “Its” are more just my brain going weeo weeo on me when that’s a more understandable one bc “its” is literally the exception to a rule (because “it’s” actually means “it is”, so to avoid it being used for two meanings the apostrophe is removed for ownership cases), but when I see apostrophes before an S for plural wording and I know they speak English properly I’m just like. ugh. damn. bruh. please. go back to school.
Less severe cases of incorrect apostrophe use tends to be like, when people are playing Heroes and have duplicates of units and are like “my Ike’s” instead of “my Ikes”, because I think people are trying to... make it more clear that it’s referring to more than one? I think? Maybe? Or they literally just don’t realize it’s incorrect grammar, idk lol. Still can’t get past my weeo weeo autopilot brain though sadly.
LIKE. IT’S NOT ANYONE’S FAULT THAT MY BRAIN IS WEEO WEEO, IT JUST IS.
Which speaking of Heroes, FE in general seems to have its script in every single game ever coded to always use apostrophes for ownership cases even when the word ends in S, so don’t worry folks. IntSys isn’t getting off scot free from my brain either LOL. No amount of “princess’s” is ever gonna fly with my weeo weeo brain.
this has been a psa
mainly a psa of my brain weeo weeos
#DCB Comments#but the absolute worst offenders are people who overuse apostrophes and like#don't know how to write the plural of a word. today I saw someone write horse's to indicate more than one more horse#and I think the darkest depths of my soul finally cracked at the sight shjfgjhgs#this wasn't someone who speaks in broken English either or anything. they know how to speak the whole language just fine#also the other worst thing about my grammar brain is that I could absolutely get a job teaching English based on my knowledge alone#but I don't have an uwu master's degree uwu so getting teaching jobs even as freelance work is basically impossible#the world decides your worth based on how much you were willing to pay an institution for a certificate#and doesn't base you on your actual worth or knowledge so yeah that's great#can't wait until we're in an anime or video game where society's young decides that's bullshit and we're totally over it and rebel sjkfghju#also you know how you see those posts of ppl being like forget what you learned in school? yeah no don't do that with grammar#to an extent it's one thing (the really stupid ''rules'' like don't start a sentence with x word) and some of it was over the top#but there ARE actually legit reasons for some of those grammar rules; it's just that schools fail to teach them properly#I was extremely lucky to have very amazing English teachers for the most part ngl bc most schools don't teach even basic shit well#at least in my country. even in my school the stuff they taught was shit lol I just got very lucky to have great English teachers#but like for instance run on sentences are usually seen as an issue in writing because people lose their understanding of the sentence#if the sentence goes on too long with too many thoughts you'll probably forget what it was even about in the first place#if it's a WRITING style like a book or a fanfic or whatever it can make sense in some cases you just have to be thoughtful abt it!#but rly like I see people who can't even write basic English grammar who can speak it fluently and I'm like#what the fuck are these schools doing??? bc I can tell you what they're NOT doing e.e#this isn't limited to gen z btw I see ppl around my age who do this stuff with grammar too so... yikes#in fact I see people OLDER than my generation doing it too like... my own mom lmao#I'M SORRY I JUST HAD TO GET THIS OUT IT'S BEEN EATING AWAY MY EXISTENCE FOR MANY YEARS
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bixiaoshi · 2 years ago
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#thinking abt my dad as often as i do pisses me off bcs i've tried to convince myself for years that i dont care abt him and he's irrelevant#to me but i just. i think of him so often. he's so present in my life without being and it makes me mad. it makes me furious#i can't do shit without thinking my dad used to take me here i can't go places i went w him without thinking i was here w my dad once i ate#this food w him once and i hate thinking of him on his birthday bcs out of the 8 years i stopped seeing him he has msged me like 3 times in#all my birthdays and i feel bad bcs i take those fucking msges as oh maybe he is trying to reconnect w me but is he really? can i take a#maximum of 3 msges a year as trying hard to reconnect with me? even tho he has been told time and time again speaking to him doesn't do me#any good?#last time i saw him was 6 years ago. is he rlly trying?#ever since i stopped going to his house i've seen him. 3 times. in 8 years. 3 times. and is he rlly trying?#and i hate craving love from him bcs i know will never get it. i will never get him to be a father to me bcs he's simply not able to be a#good father to me. other ppl yeah. he's present in other people's lives but not mine. he was a good person to everyone but me#and yet even tho i am aware of everything he put me through is not smth dads who love their kids do i still wish for him to be my father#is he even aware i'm supposed to graduate this year#i don't miss him. i don't. but i still wish he was the dad he once was#and i think what makes me sadder is the fact that he was a good dad once he was a present father once but smth happened along the way and#he chose another person above me and decided i just wasn't worth the effort of being a good parent#jo.txt
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arolesbianism · 1 month ago
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Sighs and makes a token bloodfiend nugget
#rat rambles#oc posting#I wasn't going to but one of my older nuggets has been needing literally anything for me to work with for a while now#and Ive been coming up with some ideas but for them to work Id need them to be at least semi immortal which Im sure I could bullshit some#justification for but bloodfiend is much easier plus it does work well with the concepts I have rn#long story short they (parker) got very existential about the weight of time and the concept of eternal suffering as a wee bloodfiend#for a bit they sought to make themself as empty and unfeeling as they could until they realized what they saw as emptyness was in itself an#experience that they were in fact experiencing and feeling and they got even more existential about the nature of existing and what it#means to exist and decided that to exist is an imperfection but that one cannot simply stop existing so all there is to do is wait#which lead to them forming a more laid back attitue generally speaking but with a thick layer of judgement towards everyone around them#they consider themself deeply merciful to those around them as while you cannot stop existing you can cut off traits and experiences#which they generally dont see as worth doing due to how taking away certain experiences leads to new ones but they do still see death as#barely a net gain in value just not enough so to become a serial killer over it#and again they see themself as super merciful and forgiving for not murdering people more and for generally 'trying' to be kind to others#theyre more polite than anything and polite very much does not equal kind especially in this instance#they have made plenty of enemies through their strong sense of self righteousness and said enemies include many family members#they dont mind though. they understand that most would be broken by the revelations theyve had (it did break them but dont tell them that)#(also theyre yknow wrong in general but this is abt how they view reality)
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longagoitwastuesday · 2 months ago
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Found Gojo/Ijichi art. All is good in the world
#The chokehold they have on me is unexpected lol#I was thinking just a few days ago that Gojo/Utahime was growing on me in earnest beyond the art and fics#even though it definitely came from that with how looking for Utahime stuff almost necessarily takes you to Gojo#But yeah Ijichi/Gojo still are it for me here haha I felt like a genoma soldier in mgs when I saw the art. Could feel the ! pop over my head#I could have done a silly little dance#I don't know. It wasn't even romantic truly? Or not explicitly? I love when art does that. For some reason it moves me so much#There's this comic in which Utahime Shoko and Ijichi all feel Gojo's absence through the silence he left behind#instead of being his annoying self asking for sweet or teasing or joking around and it left such a big impression on me#And there's another one in which Utahime is doing just something work related and suddenly she notices how quiet it is#How strange the silence#Smiles softly because it's comfortable. Because it's better. But it doesn't feel better. It doesn't feel good.#Her smiling face and tilting head thinking 'Oh. It's so quiet. How strange' doesn't feel positive at all and that too isn't exactly ship art#but it too moved me to the bone and left a big impression on me#Ship related art with Gojo as one of the parties I love when they include Geto's absence somewhat. There's one in which Gojo's talking#with Geto and iirc Geto teases him about how he doesn't look happy at all about finally getting Utahime to agree to a date with him#and Gojo makes some comment about how it's all for nothing because there's an uncrossable line between them. A separation#That they're bound to break up or something so it's not truly worth it to make the connection#And then you can see Gojo is actually alone and Geto was never there. He just knew him so well he could make up what he would have said#And damn was that good#Same with that one first fic I read back in June. It was Gojo/Utahime but it was in great part about Geto's abandonment of Gojo and Shoko#It started and ended that way#And it drove me nuts haha so good#Anyway... I don't know. I love when artista exploit that aspect of the characters mourning Gojo in their daily routines#Ijichi checking if there's still sweets in the car. Shoko double checking some rooms. Utahime musing about how quiet it is without him#It feels so... so true to life. How it never ends. How at times memory plays tricks on you and for one instant you almost forget#You almost expect the other person to appear. And then the absence feels bigger and unbearable again#Like living it all over again#Oh it's true. I don't need to keep sweets in the car anymore#It's true. He won't ever be in this room again nor will he ever be the one opening the morge's door#He won't be making noise or interrupting me anymore. I can't even say it's bothersome yet it is. What do I do with this silence I have left?
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