#this really has me thinking about tragic powers and makes me wanna write…

[friendlylocalwhumper]

Hey there whump-fellow! I was wondering if you might help me out a bit. I'm writing an original superhero story for Camp NaNo this year and I want the main character's superpower to come with whumpy side-effects, but I am having a hard time coming up with anything even slightly original in that regard. Do you have any suggestions or examples I might play off of? Also, I am going to ask around to a few whump blogs to cast a wider net! Any suggestions as to whom I should ask?

Telekinesis/mind reading with a side effect of migraines. Agony, sensitivity to light/noise. Days-long pain after just using their powers once, which causes the pavlovian response of an awful headache starting up just at the thought of using their powers.

Fire powers that leave burns, thick scars that hurt less and less the more the powers are used but the nerves die more and more, meaning that the whumpee loses feeling in their fingers, then hands, then arms. They will miss out on feeling gentle breezes, soft blankets, holding hands with a friend.

Ice powers that cause frostbite. They can put out a fire, stop an enemy instantly, catch someone who is falling before they die… but the pain afterward is intense, and they always have to weigh the benefits of saving lives versus potentially losing a part of their own body. Or their powers give frostbite to anyone that the ice touches!

Invincibility that lasts for as long as it’s being used, but after the battle is over, in safety, all the damage hits at once. Bruises bloom in purples and blues, cuts spring forth and leave the whumpee scrambling to apply pressure and soak up too much blood before they pass out.

Invisibility/phasing that is strategically useful because the whumpee can sneak or pass through obstacles, but it makes their body have too loose a grasp on reality and their loved ones lose memories of them. They may be able to sneak into a dangerous place and get out unharmed, but their mother or partner will now struggle to recall their name.

A superpower that was desperately wished for in an hour of need, but now every time that it’s used, something precious has to be sacrificed. For the power to be used, an hierloom has to be chosen to disappear from existence, or a limb has to be chosen to never work without pain again, or a comforting memory has to be forgotten. Eventually this would leave the whumpee tougher, less sensitive to loss, but they would also have so much less comfort to come home to. This power would work great as a “gift” from a deity, fae, supernatural creature, or a naively summoned ghost.

Villain-turned-hero who used to use their powers for evil, but now that they are fighting for good, their powers keep trying to turn on them. They used to melt guards’ weapons and locks off vaults, but now that they try to melt doors shut to keep out storms or villains, the molten metal sputters and hits their skin. Or they used to make their nemesis’ armor, tools, or on their most evil day, that nemesis’ most cherished friend disappear; but now after a long hard day of protecting people, when they come home, they find that their partner is missing. They find that their car keys are gone, their fridge, their shoes. Sometimes it is a small thing they won’t even miss, and sometimes it is something so devastating to lose that they fall to their knees and sob.

The superpower of being able to compel that the truth be given after they ask a question. Very useful for a detective, a hero in a corrupt society littered with propaganda, a spy trying to work their way up in an evil organization. But if they ask a question that someone doesn’t know the answer to, it can drive that person mad. If they ask a question someone would rather die than answer, they will give the truth but then be emotionally broken from admitting that aloud. If that person would rather kill than answer…

Any power which has no direct side effects immediately after use, but which is forbidden or horrifying for some reason. Maybe it is the power to bring the dead back to life for just long enough to answer questions, which is morally complicated. Maybe it’s the power to cause intense agony without leaving physical marks. Maybe it’s the ability to travel through time, which causes alternate universes to sprout up and can cause mass deaths, confusion, or chaos in the future. Whatever the power is, it has to be used for some reason, and hiding its use and its consequences leaves the hero afraid, unable to trust anyone, and devastatingly ashamed. This could lead to angsty confessions, betrayal, abandonment, a public execution, banishment, etc.

A very subtle, pleasant power that is embarassingly weak in a time when more power is needed. the ability to numb pain, which feels useless during war when people are bleeding out and losing friends. the ability to see the future in a time when everyone knows what the horrifying outcome will be and no one can stop it. the ability to stop time, but not to move or change what is happening, which just leaves the hero stuck to think, to rely on their own mind to try to solve a terrible problem while seeing everyone frozen in a moment of pain or fear.

I’m not sure about other whump blogs you could ask, but anyone who sees this post is totally welcome to add ideas! The side effects of the superpower don’t have to be direct or ironic, so any random idea could be perfect for the story! No idea is bad!

[technicallyfriendly]

I promised a while ago I would make a fanfiction rec list for lucemond, so here we go:

Star-crossed by DominaReginald

I have to say this is my all-time favourite lucemond fic. If you like the Lucerys-gets-kidnapped-instead-of-eaten-at-Storm's-End-trope, then this one is already worth a read, but what I love about this story is that it shows how the conflict really impacts lucemond's relationship, which is the focus of the plot. Much happens, of course, but the story focuses on how the war and Aemond's subsequent participation in it impacts his relationship with Lucerys. It's also very interesting how this story handles the marriage pact with the Baratheons. But really, a short summary will not do this master piece justice, so I urge you to go and read it yourself! For anyone who is hesitant due to the major character death warning: It's not the main couple, though the deaths occurring are tragic and happen to beloved characters.

the beast you've made of me by MotherMaidenCrone

I don't think anyone has walked past this amazing and beautiful fic in this fandom, but it still deserves its mention on this list as well. No other story has ever done a Team Neutral approach this well and nuanced. If you wanna see Lucerys girilboss his way through King's Landing politics and beat everyone at the Game of Thrones in a desperate bid to save his family from self-destruction, this is for you!

the tragic evolution of desire by toraophim

So I debated long and hard before I added this on because, boy, does this one make you feel stuff, and a lot of it is not great. It's an amazingly written story, and since I enjoy dark themes, I did like it a lot. Though, and this is important, the warnings are there for a reason, this dove is deader than dead. Also, none of the characters are having a good time here aside from Aegon for a time, which is why you should not read this if you are an Aegon stan. The author really turned him into a monster. If you are like me and enjoy an emotional rollercoaster with a somewhat happy ending, I say proceed with caution ;).

Set fire to the rain by baby345

This is a collection of a few short stories about lucemond. I really enjoy the writing and its variety!

Blood for Blood by GoddessofRoyalty

The way the author puts it in the summary is actually the best way to describe this fic: Aemond is not cruel, but he is also not kind (and Lucerys has both none of and all the power). And that is also how I like their dynamic. The story is told in snippets of their life together before and after the marriage, and the writing is really enjoyable!

all I had to give by monkkeyslut

This one starts out as one-sided love despite Aemond trying really hard, in his own way of course, but it's not just about their relationship but also about dealing with the aftermath of the war and the current unstable position of Lucerys due to the continued absence of an heir. This fanfiction is not only well written and a great ride, but the author also has an interesting take on Alys before we got even got introduced to her in HotD.

Office Lucemond by Avonne

This is a collection of ModernAU!Lucemond fanfiction about lucemond matching each other's freak told through the eyes of their stunned and slightly terrified coworkers and through the eyes of a very unimpressed Vharga.

Borros and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day by lucerysinthesky

This is the funniest lucemond fanfiction I've ever read, which is why it gets a place on this list despite being tragically unfinished, but I have not given up hope quite yet! Maybe one day we'll get the last chapter. Still even unfinished, it is awesome, and it'll make you cry laughing, I promise. The title says it all already, and Borro's does suffer a lot while also having a full character arc and all while trying unsuccessfully not to die.

For now, I'll finish this rec list here, but there are still many more great stories out there that I haven't mentioned. Maybe I'll update it in the future or make another one for the once that I did not include here. For the ones reading this, I wish you a lot of fun reading the stories!

[lightningant]

I've never seen characterizations of Tom and Harry the way yours is. I love how neurotic and messed up they both are -- they're *SO CUTE* too. <3 <3 <3

Tom is just so exhausted and cynical and Harry is a manic catastrophe with sooo many crossed wires and they're HILARIOUS. XD

And just so well written, I cannot tell you how distracted I was for at least a week after I read what you had for your fic -- I truly, truly admire your narration and dialogue and characterizations (I already said that but PLEASE I LOVE THEM SO **BAD** >O< ) Soooo funny and well made.

They're realistic! Tom and Harry are so messy and also normal people at the end of the day who make mistakes and aren't super cool all the time (really, they're utter dorks, and you TOTALLY show thatt) but also they're competent and scary and stubborn and you just have suchh a nice blend of their facets and I JUST....aghhh, I love itt.

Also I ADORE your designs -- I love how Tom is so sickly and neat (you said it best "Victorian child with tuberculosis" LMAO), and Harry is so IDK, he's just a Guy but in the most wonderful way -- I'm not actually good with words :,))))

I just love your art style in general, it's like, realistic yknow. You don't get rid of normal people "imperfections", they're a part of the design or enhance them -- I don't think the word imperfections is right, I just mean like, you don't exclude non-conventionally attractive aspects of bodies or facial expressions??? Idk, I'm trying here, I really am. Just, just, just I like it a lot and I wanna be like that toooooo >.<

IIIIIIII dunno if I have accurately gotten anything across or even given an actual good compliment in this entire thing but anyways you're very cool and awesome and also PLEASE forget that I said they were Babygirl I've never used that word before in my LIFEE and don't know if that was right at all -- if it was nevermind I meant it all and am so cool -- ANYWAYS bye :,)

I don't think I've succeeded in lessening my embarrassment but uhhhhh, I hope I've at least articulated myself better :,)))

Askbomb swag. Thank you, this message was so sweet :) I shall try to match energies.

One of the things I love most is that the kind of person who puts up pretensions is, innately, trying to hide something about themselves they find sub-par. Tom isn't just a scary and incredibly powerful domineering sigma male who is a master manipulator, he is a person who is actively attempting to turn himself into that man, and in my fic he is still a teenager and still tripping his way through that mental image he has of himself. The two worst ages to ever be are 15 and 20; fifteen, when you are ready to shed childhood but don't know what maturity looks like just yet, and 20, when you are ready to become your own person and achieve adulthood, picking your way across existence-defining beliefs. And his only friend for the past like, 7 months? has been his 16-year-old self who has the single-minded objective of looking cool and mature to his adult self. A hell of his own making.

Harry is also 20. He is one of those 'unusually mature for his age' kids and he has an inflated sense of his own righteousness and capability, despite being the actual one with the emotional range of a teaspoon (he just knows to keep it himself). There is no way Harry would detect he is having a manic fit, especially if he is having one that is triggered by his arrested feelings on Sirius. It's incredibly fun writing him perform this extremely risky and reality-altering plan and his plan was "idk, kill him?" and picking shit up off the ground whenever he sees it, the DADA position included. our hero.

Beautiful tragic terminally ill gothic prince / fit jock is really a match made in heaven aesthetically. Cannot get enough of it

Thank you for art compliment too ^_^ I used to lean more to anime fandoms so Harry Potter really let me stretch my legs on more 'normal people' facial features like big noses and soft chins and I'm glad it's clear how much fun I'm having doing that. Yay! Though one of the compliments I've always gotten that I've always been proud of is how distinct the way I draw expressions is.

No no...you're right. Tom is absolutely a babygirl. And Harry...well he was certainly Ginny's babygirl, and I'm sure a part of him is really itching to have someone put their hand on the small of his back 😔

[some-pers0n]

hi hey just wanna let u know that i (this anon in particular) would always want to listen to your thoughts about The Thing youre excited about regardless of the reason or my knowledge or the time-space continuum!

YOU! Ohhh anon you poor soul. I'm terribly sorry. I have been holding onto this ask for a while, at least until the next time I felt as Energized about Them again. Shaking. Twitching. I don't quite know how to explain it. I can only take potshots at attempting to rationalize my thoughts behind them. With that said, here's more rambling about Engiemedic, the only thing I seem to care about

I've rambled about Engiemedic a fair amount of times before, either jokingly with goofy remarks about them or writing a giantass fic about them. They scratch a certain part of my brain that is difficult to really describe and pin-down.

Like I've never really "shipped" anybody before them. Did I like ships? Yeah sure of course. I've always liked considering relationships and thinking about how they intersect and are written. It's probably definitely the aroace bit of me talking, but I only really get involved in ships when there's really some substance to them.

It makes Engiemedic this weird fucked up anomaly to me then because what the hell do you mean that this decently popular non-canon pairing that's had all of like 30 seconds of shared screentime and maybe seven panels where they're in the same room at max has become so engrossing and fascinating to me. It's not like the usual ships where this happens to people; the ones with lengthy tragic tales tied to them or spend so much time with one another. It's just two silly guys

It just...perplexes me. It's odd. I can't describe what about it really draws me in, despite the fact I've written so much. I can at least try and figure out what it is though

I think the thing that made me first interested was simply the dynamic and jokes to be made. They are exceptionally silly, wherein I can fully believe them sticking together and doing weird experiments for hours upon hours. It's hard not to imagine them getting excited over whatever project they've been throwing themselves at. It's fun

Because ultimately both Engie and Medic are both unethical murderous science people, Medic obviously while Engie is a tiny bit more subtle. Their dynamic is interesting in that regard 'cause, when paired together, now you've got two weirdo freaky smart people tossing back ideas and before you know it now they're trying to create some sort of nuclear-powered contraption that explodes bones

It calls out to me in a way that other ships don't, especially Heavymedic. No shade to Heavymedic shippers out there, I think it's still a fun ship, but I don't find it as compelling with their dynamic. Heavy is a reasonable and level-headed guy. Yeah he kills people and laughs about their misery and whatever, but he's more stable than most other mercs. If Medic was to say "I want to self-isolate for days on end while I work to create the bubonic plague 2.0" Heavy would have concerns and try to stop him from doing it because What the Hell

Engie, however, would endorse it. I think Engie and Medic are very similar in that regard. They're dedicated to their crafts and understand the nuance and skill that it takes to partake in it. Engie obviously still has qualms and is there in case Medic clearly ain't right, but he's more likely to get caught up in whatever experiment that Medic is trying to do

Which brings me to my next point: the way they influence each other. When together, I think they are at their best and worst (morally at least). It's like that trope with two smart people coming together and being dumbasses, but instead it's with them making weird creations and doing odd experiments that ultimately do not benefit anyone. They simply do it for fun

On a more personal level, I think Medic draws out the parts of Engie where he tries to hide and represses. Headcanons, obviously, but I think Medic taps into Engie's more sinister nature as a maniac with a god complex and a hankering to kill and really draws it out. It's infectious and hard not to try and match his energy. Medic makes Engie want to get more creative with his projects and drives him to be more experimental and, of course, murderous

Likewise and, again, mainly headcanons, I think Engie helps Medic tap into a slightly more "human" side. I think Medic generally struggles with caring about other people, discarding them in favour of working on his own projects and being by himself. Engie is one of the first people he's encountered that not only likes him and enjoys his company, but is just as wacky and weird as he is. Engie is more charismatic and outgoing and, while still not too terribly great with the whole emotions thing, helps Medic out in case he's Not Doing Good

Their personalities intertwine so much they make me ever so slightly ill. They don't seem alike really at first glance. Medic is over the top, eccentric, and generally a giggly mad scientist. Clear to see the archetype he's based on. Yet, when you look past Engie's charming little quips about Texas, he's very much alike Medic. He has a god complex, is highly intelligent, morally bankrupt, etc and etc. He's just as eccentric and wacky as the doc is, but is only slightly better at keeping it under wraps

I just think they're really entertaining when put together honestly. Sure yeah I love me my angsty and fluffy stuff with them, but I think they're simply great when just working on some project and talking to each other. Their personalities bounce off of one another exceptionally well and it's hard for them not to get so caught up in their work that Oh No it's been Four Days and they haven't left the workshop/laboratory

Ultimately, yeah. I think they care about each other a lot that way. Their work is...intimate in a way. They're lab partners. They spend all of this time together, defying God's will with whatever unholy machination they've crafted, they got to have some sort of bond

What makes me happy is that I think a lot of people really like the concept of Engiemedic in any form. Platonic, romantic, whatever. I personally go for QPR stuff (something about their love being undefinable by normal standards blah blah), but I think it's a neat observation that makes me like it more. It's hard to deny that they're really fun together

Speaking of their connections, let's talk about their roles in the actual game. Y'all heard of the Heavymedic duo, with Heavy running around with a Medic pocketing him the entire time, but have you ever considered the Engiemedic duo?? Engie and Medic are the BACKBONES of this game honestly. All it takes is one Engineer or Medic on a team to shift the balance entirely. Everyone wants a good Engie and Medic, but it's a hard role to fill and nobody really wants it. However, they're needed. They're necessary. They're the main support roles of the game than, say, Sniper or Spy ever are. They're the underappreciated, yet incredibly vital parts of the team.

Honestly the Engiemedic duo is far more prevalent and makes far more sense than the Heavymedic duo, because tbh you can say that Medic is closely connected to any class. Soldiermedic duo where Solly just spams rockets and wipes out the entire team. Demomedic duo where Demo just spams pipes and annihilates every building. What makes the Heavymedic duo any special? God I'm sorry for being a little Heavymedic hater, I promise I think the ship is alright, but idk. I like Engiemedic a lot

Anywho, I think Engiemedic is extremely fun to write about as well as just generally experience. There's so much you can apply to them. It's hard to think of anything they can't do, really. They're great with humor, what with shoving them into a room with some cadaver and letting them have at it. They're great with angst because, with headcanons, they can be really heavily fucked up people trying to make things work. They're great with fluff because they're so silly and it's easy to think of them doing cute things with one another. The list goes on!

They're...special to me. They're certainly something. I could go into all sorts of other things too (more esoteric and metaphoric I'm talking), but eh who cares. I don't like delving too much into headcanons and my own weird readings with these more generalized rambles. I just think they're silly :]

[fictionstudent]

Kafka's magnum opus.

Metamorphosis is Kafka’s most celebrated novel. And it’s no doubt that it’s well-deserved. The way the characters play their part, the way this world works, and the themes that the story tackles—Metamorphosis truly resonates with a lot of people today.

I read the novel long ago, but I couldn’t help but think about it still. And, to be honest, I wanna re-read it once again these days. My recent writers’ block has left me demotivated about reading and writing a lot, and I really wanna read something that brings that motivation back.

Anyway, I’m not here to trauma-dump lol. I wanna engage in this conversation about Metamorphosis, how it reflects Kafka’s feelings, and the themes that it tackles. So let’s get goin’.

***

#01 – The Plot

The plot of Metamorphosis is simple—as Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams, he found himself transformed in his bed into a gigantic insect. And if you couldn’t catch it, this is the exact same sentence that begins the novel. I ChatGPT’d it, by the way, and different translators are gonna use different vocabulary, you know, because the novel is originally written in German—so maybe it’s not entirely your fault that you couldn’t catch that.

Anyway, everything that happens after that is quite… tumultuous. He finds out that he couldn’t talk, walk like a human, or even get of this bed without much difficulty. And his family—they’re obviously scared.

But all that doesn’t bother me. Gregor, all this time, is only thinking of his job till now. He’s the sole breadwinner of his family, and he has some important stuff to do at his job today that, apparently, I forgot about. Lol.

As time goes on, his sister tries her best to help him—she cleans his room, gives him food. But his parents have already lost interest. His appearance worries them, and they can’t see their son in him. Because there’s no one earning now, money is their main problem. They try renting one of their rooms, but, well, let’s just say that didn’t really go well. Because of Gregor. (i dun rly wana spoil it all yk.)

Gregor feels like a burden to his family. And that’s probably because he’s a burden to himself, too. He can’t work, or even get outside his room now. His family is scared of him.

Some misunderstandings later, even his sister is not interested in him anymore. But, as Gregor cuts himself away from these people he can’t even communicate with anymore, he finds it fun to climb and use his new limbs. He’s finally enjoying his transformation—and that’s precisely what brings about the misunderstanding I talked about earlier.

And soon, he dies a tragic death. A death that everybody is happy about. A death that brings about the hopes and warmth in people’s life, that takes the burden off their shoulders. And maybe Gregor’s too.

***

#02 – The Alienation

Now, the story very obviously focuses on the themes of alienation and loneliness. And maybe that’s why the novel is as relevant as it is today—loneliness is never easy. And it’s hard to convey this emotion. Probably because it refers to being alone, but you can feel lonely without being alone, y’know.

At the beginning of the novel, Gregor wakes up and finds that he’s turned into an insect. And it’s a really powerful opening, because loneliness is not something that seeps into an individual’s life slowly. It just… happens. One day, everything changes.

One day, you wake up. You look around. And you find out that you’re different. And that makes it difficult to even get outta your bed and start the day.

But is there something wrong with you, and that’s why you’re alienated? This is a question that this novel asks itself a lot, though not explicitly. Is there something wrong with Gregor, or is he just different?

Or has something changed? Yeah, I’d take this one—something changed. Not just how Gregor sees himself, probably, but how others see him. Or Gregor’s just find out how people actually see him, and that’s what brings about this metamorphosis.

It’s really a tough question, if you think, what Kafka is trying to symbolize with this. Why has Gregor turned into an insect? I mean, why is it not the other way around, where others have changed but he hasn’t?

That’s probably got something to do with how alienation makes you feel. If—God forbid—has such a situation come up for you, you know how you feel that there’s probably something wrong with you and that’s why people won’t talk to you. You can’t point out what it is, but you get the gut-feeling that there is something.

Another thing that turning into an insect might represent is that Gregor thinks that he’s smaller, weaker, or in some way just worse than others. Just… not equal to others, y’know.

Kafka has done a really good job setting this up, now that I think about it. The symbolism of turning into an insect really describes well what people might experience during loneliness—and probably this is why we still read and talk about this novel.

As the story goes on, Kafka goes deeper into this feeling of despair and self-denigration. Gregor is a burden to himself as well as to his family. And because he can’t communicate, he’s pushing everybody away—though others didn’t really try to be with him either.

However, Gregor starts to find peace in this darkness too. He learns to live with it—and now, he enjoys using his limbs to climb up walls. That’s another symbolism—how people kinda get used to this feeling of loneliness and start finding enjoyment in even the littlest of things. And, sometimes, even use it to their advantage.

It so beautifully represents how life is not just black or white—it’s gray. It’s not happy or sad—it’s bittersweet. And that’s what I love most about this novel—even though the situation Gregor finds himself in is so damn unrealistic, everything that happens around it is way too real. Way too real.

I, personally, resonate so much with the whole premise and every symbol that’s presented here. If you look at it, the novel is so obviously one big metaphor for loneliness.

***

#03 – The Third Act

In the end, Gregor dies. Alone, at one corner of his room.

And everybody is relieved. The big insect is not haunting their room anymore, Gregor’s sister is mature enough to take up the house’s responsibilities, and the family has enough for now to move to some better place and start a better life.

The ending doesn’t make sense. When Gregor turned into an insect, the family was being slowly relegated to poverty. But now that he’s dead, all their worries have suddenly gone away.

The thing is—this ending reflects Kafka’s own state of mind. It’s not logical—it’s not supposed to be logical. It’s supposed to convey what might happen when Kafka dies—and it’s that people would be better of without him. That people around him would thank Destiny for his death, for taking the burden of the man named Franz Kafka away from them. For ever.

It's so damn pessimistic, but I guess that’s what loneliness does to you. It’s no doubt that Kafka has always felt this loneliness in his personal life. His works were never published in his lifetime, so he must have felt worthless as a writer. And as a human, he had so little social relationships. He had some tensions with his father, and he felt his mother was never there for him either. He had lovers, but he never married.

He died alone.

The third act of this novel is not the real ending to the story—it’s how Kafka thinks it’s supposed to end.

***

#04 - Conclusion

Sorry it got a little depressing, lol. For this blog, I thought a lot about the story and the ideas it toys with, and I think it’s really a masterpiece. His magnum opus. And now I have sufficient reasons to back it up.

I’d love to write something this deep and realistic. That’s why I aim to study novels, after all.

And yeah, sorry for these rare uploads. I’ve been suffering through a really bad writers’ block for the past couple of months, as I hinted earlier, and at one point, it was so bad that I could not even move myself to open my laptop and write. I’d never procrastinated writing before, so the anxiety that comes with it kinda made it worse. I even scrapped the novel I was working on (again), and I guess I’d start writing something new in some time.

But it’s better than before, and I should be back on track from now on. Also, Imma write a blog about the writers’ block, lol, so just you guys wait. More good stuff is on its way.

[official-nrc-prophet]

Ranking my favorite to least favorite hashira

I just finished the Swordsmith village arc, Hulu please I want the next one TwT

1 . Muichiro Tokito! This guy is just so fun, and his flashbacks made me cry. I love how there's just a random 14 year old in the group, who happens to insult demons until they die. After he remembered things, Gyokko had zero shot.

2 . Mitsuri Kanroji! I will personally fight anyone who doesn't like her just because the creators decided to sexualize her character. She is powerful, strong, beautiful, and amazing. Probably would be my favorite if Muichiro wasn't so funny to me. She's just the best (You can do better than Iguro girl anyone who says otherwise can die by your blade)

3. Sanemi Shinazugawa! This guy is such a terrible person and I love it. Please blink more. Please accept your little brother. Please keep making fun of Giyu and being a complete ass. He needs to throw hands more, I'd like to see him and Inosuke fist fight.

4. Giyu Tomioka! This guy is great. I like how he seems so cool in front of Tanjiro but in reality he's just a sad wet cat. I hope we get to see him more, probably in the new Hashira training arc. No spoilers please. He just seems so interesting, I wanna know why everyone else in the hashira seem to dislike him so much.

5. Kyojuro Rengoku! This guy was fun. I'm sad he died so quickly, we didn't get to experience a lot of him. I'm very curious, because Akaza was open and "friendly" with him, but in the swordsmith village arc Akaza was guarded and being violent and snappy. It makes Rengoku feel way more special in my eyes.

6. Tengen Uzui! This man is so stupid and I hate him. He's an interesting character, and I like him in theory, just not in practice. The only reason he's higher is because he actually has something I find interesting. I'm very confused on the three wives thing. I think it's extremely funny when people write or draw him simping for Rengoku because I do get bisexual disaster from him.

7. Obanai Iguro! "But I'm a creep... I'm a weirdo..." this guy is creepy and I don't like him. Get him away from Mitsuri. I know his backstory is tragic, but I don't care! Especially since in the demon slayer academy he's portrayed as "allergic to women". He just gives me creepy guy who lives in his moms basement. Discord mod vibes. Weirdo.

8. Shinobu Kocho! Shinobu is another one where there's definitely more to her, but until we figure that out, she just seems rather blank to me. It's definitely on purpose, because she's supposed to have her big reveal when fighting a demon, and we know a little from Kanao she used to have an older sister. I'm just frustrated because it seems like she has nothing else. The most interesting thing about her is the rest of the girls at the Butterfly Mansion.

9. Gyomei Himejima! He's another one where there's more to him, I just haven't seen it. But I don't really like what I do see? Like, he pitied Tanjiro and Nezuko, but was willing to kill them. If he's trying to be portrayed as a sympathetic man, it's not working. Also he just looks like a geodude from Pokémon to me, except with a worse color pallet.

[bellaaldamas]

Sometimes I wanna discuss: (Essay incoming)

the take that "Santa Monica Studio stripped GOW of its original identity by making the Norse saga, especially Ragnarok, too vanilla/bland and mass-marketable for the non-fans/newcomers. Like they were trying to make it everyone's cup of tea when it wasn't originally, which wasn't a bad thing. That it's too melodramatic, saccharine and humorless for what was once an over the top and bold game that was rightfully dark and somber, but still wasn't afraid to poke fun; Ex. the silly costumes.

And Kratos not actually being that well written, and that the now present theme of fatherhood is one of many things there to make it seem deep, and the story was too tropey/patriarchical because Faye dies and that drives their journey. His redemption/development not being handled well, because he has always felt bad for his crimes, and that has not actually changed. In that back in the Greek saga he knew what he was doing was wrong, but he couldn't help himself because how badly emotionally wounded he was, and in that sense was a compelling tragic figure though an awful person, but now all there is to that facet of him now is that he just feels remorse. Like Ragnarok was one big apology from SMS for him being... him. And once again, bending over too much to try and appease people who thought that he was too mean when that's just who he was as a character. the new direction not being as deep as SMS made it seem, and people ate it up.

Mind you, this came from someone (definitely not some troll, whose artwork I respect which is why I'm posting but I don't want to drop names) for whom the Greek saga meant a lot to. They were going through a lot of shit at the hands of others, and GOW at the time actually gave them catharsis and kept them grounded through that, and therefore had the perspective of Kratos as a power fantasy *not simply for bigoted dudebros*,but for when they felt powerless and disenfranchised, though they didn't condone his actions and were aware that he was far from a good human being. Though there are said dudebros that ignore the main message of "ripping people apart gives you a lot of catharsis but will make you regret it so much in the end", they themselves didn't miss that. They thought all the somber elements and moral cautions were made clear enough in the first few games, that they felt talked down to in the Norse saga, like it was too preachy. Overall, they just feel mournful that a game that meant so much to them... Isn't really quite there anymore.

Now, my thoughts as a Norse saga enjoyer/newcomer? I haven't finished the story of the Greek games and I'll take this as a sign that I should, so I can't speak suuuuper extensively on that as of the moment. Based on the things I've heard about the Greek saga, I most certainly don't agree with writing it off to prop up the Norse saga. I too dislike when things pretend to be deep but aren't, but Norse saga handled a lot of themes/messages quite well to me? I know it might be a bit more like things we've seen before and less "spicy" in that sense (not that I mind that spice at all)... yeah, this parts a matter of opinion I don't disrespect but can't agree on. I've seen quite a few GOW veterans enjoy the newer games just fine, and it seemed like a perfectly natural direction for the game to go in, though not perfect.

And on Kratos, I think that he's as compelling as he's always been. Remorse isn't new to him, that I don't disagree with, but it isn't all there is to his character in Norse. I'll acknowledge that they're coming from a perspective of measuring how good a character is by how well they're written/defined and not just their morality (which is a valid way of seeing things!) But to me, SMS didn't just "remove" his propensity for murder and replace it with more sorrow.

He went from not being able to help himself to bloodshed despite knowing how low he dug himself because of his trauma, to dealing with his remorse by finally facing and acting on it and treating it as something important, after realizing and caring about how much harm was done to others, and their pain, through his way of coping/actions, in addition to how little it actually helped him. This is him in a different place, actually in the midst of facing the lasting cost of catharsis to his humanity, with the mindset that it's not worth it. And then trying to actually rebuild and heal for once. So to me, it's natural for him to change this much. And yet he still is a power fantasy character to me, which I don't think that SMS is ashamed of. (It's almost 5am and I hope I got that across well) Also, his relationship with Atreus is genuinely executed well, and I wouldn't say Faye was fridged at all. I really like her and wish she was fleshed out more, though. I think there's better female rep in Norse than Greek. And that while part of it was that they wanted to cater to more people so it will sell better, if I remember correctly, I read somewhere they were running into a dead end with the Greek saga and actually wanted to take things in a new direction. And a few things here are well-worn tropes, but most of them are pulled off well.

It's poignant that sometimes, two fans' experience with the same story can be so radically different. I got sucked into the world of the Norse games when I was dealing with relationship issues/confusion and a lot of remorse and hurt on my own that I could actually relate to this iteration of Kratos about. His story of redemption, regaining trust and finding a family once more meant, and still means, quite a lot to me. In addition to that, he reminds me way too much of someone I know (online) whose content was no small help in pulling me out of a dark place, and still inspires me. And since that's how I understand that their own aforementioned experience with Greek GOW means just as much to them too, if not even more, I respect their perspective and bias, though I can't agree on a lot.

Thoughts?

(Lol I spent 2 hours writing this way too early in the morning so I hope I'm coherent, but I feel good enough to go to sleep now that I got this off of my chest)

Firstly, that's a profound and heartfelt analysis of Kratos's character arc and you should be proud of yourself for putting it together so eloquently and exquisitely (especially at 5am and needing sleep). I highly appreciate the fact that you decided to share those thoughts and your experience with the franchise with me.

What you wrote has a lot of references to personal life and unique individual experiences of yourself and other people in the fandom. Which is why I, naturally, consider it fitting to share some of my own but without delving into personal details. Because if I do people reading my tale would need immediate psychiatric help (one that wouldn't work for myself as there's no therapy in the world that could possibly ever diminish the effects of that).

Were I to start describing even a 10 percent of my life's events those reading/listening would assume it's something of a horror story or a plot of one of the many Telenovellas I've watched but not something that "happens in real life". Therefore I'll stick to discussing strictly my fandom related experiences, with a very little dash of personal when it cannot be avoided.

To start with, I'll establish from the get go that I have yet to play the Greek Saga; which I certainly will at some point. The Greek heritage of both Kratos and Atreus means a lot to me personally, especially in terms of their journey of being first forcibly torn from it and then gradually embracing it when they broke free from the toxic influences in their lives and/or formed bonds with people with shared culture and experiences (in Atreus's case it applies to both his Greek and Giant identity).

However, this begs for another clarification that needs to be made if one wants to healthily engage with media in a whole: creators (GowR creators in particular) owe me or someone else who has a similar experience with their culture exactly nothing. They are not obligated to cater to that experience, make it easier for us or even know how much seeing the representation of my or someone else's struggles means to us. Projection when it comes to media can lead to stress and even spark or rekindle depression. That's exactly why I cannot emphasize enough the importance of healthy distancing from media, even the one that speaks to you on a personal level.

Concerning fandom - definitely not just Gow(R) - the common mistake nowadays is to assume every logically flawed or incorrect point or argument can only be made by misogynistic and bigoted gamebros. This kind of dehumanizing of opponents and stereotyping them can lead to confusion when you stumble across a statement that objectively isn't true nor reflects canon but comes from a supposed (or even an actual) "progressive" thinker.

That's how the Nice Guy culture became pervasive in the media and came to be passed on as a "better alternative" for the so-called Frat Boy and Alpha Male culture. Even though the two are the sides of the same sexist coin. The idea came to flourish that Nice Guys are the "safer bet" for women, are "not like other men" (male version of "not like other girls" thinking) and that the problem isn't sexism (which obviously affects people irrespective of gender) but the women themselves. Who are supposedly too hormonal, emotional and therefore susceptible to "bad boys'" charm that they cannot appreciate the pure and "selfless" affection of the Nice Guys. Who in turn view said women as a reward for good behavior.

As the result we got a string of pseudo-progressive, actually extremely misogynistic (and, using the term you brought up from the fandom, "preachy") media products in the recent decade. Such as Disney's "woke" pandering movies that tell women they're the ones who should stop being naive and clueless romantics who are "desperate for love" and give "the wrong idea" to unscrupulous and manipulative men. Who, supposedly as the result of said women being gullible and emotional, see them as an easy target to use for their own ends (thinly disguised victim blaming is the new "woke"). That the society, including the people with a boatload of issues with social interaction and communication (AND a Snowman), know better than women's hormonal shallow selves what and, most importantly, who they really need in order to be fulfilled and how they should feel.

Instead of tackling misogyny and the normalization of abuse and exploitation of women "progressive" media now implies it's actually all woman's fault that she's being abused. Because she cannot resist Alpha Males instead of setting her sights on a "nice guy" the society tells her is the right choice. And/or because she dares to exercise her romantic agency without asking for permission from her family (which is why modern Disney heroines are completely deprived of said agency).

However, seeing as critically thinking people have been analyzing those problems with "woke Disney" in the past years the studio realized the "progressive misogyny" no longer works as a money generating tactic. The reason why the new The Little Mermaid remake ended up being - surprisingly - good and presented an uplifting and inspiring love story (if not as refreshing and unique as the original Eric/Ariel, despite the remake's creators' best efforts) is because Disney came back to celebrating the traits and behaviors of women that made them (and the princess franchise in particular) originally appealing to female audience in the first place. Namely, woman's self expression and right to take her own independent decisions regardless of society's opinion.

Some of the changes to the original animated film were indeed questionable (having live action Ariel not ascend to surface before the day she saw Eric - thus bending to her father's patriarchal pressure and linking her major act of defiance to another man - as well as having her sing "Under the Sea" along with Sebastian; when the entire point of that segment in the original was that Ariel wasn't falling for his propaganda and barely gave it a thought - was a spectacularly bad idea; as was having Ariel forget about the need to kiss Eric; thus, from the narrative standpoint, giving the romantic/sexual agency entirely to him, a man). But the main idea of the original - woman's right to make her own choices in every area of life - was preserved, as was psychological complexity of the characters. Which is exactly why the live action ended up being successful (in addition to, of course, the explosive chemistry of the main couple - probably the only one that HAS said chemistry out of the "remade" versions of Disney romances). All of the aforementioned issues can be easily fixed in the sequel, if one is ever made (which I'm keeping my fingers crossed for).

Thus why it would be wrong to fall into the trap of thinking just because someone in the fandom doesn't fall under the "gamebro" (read: Alpha Male) category that their view is an authority on how you should perceive a story.

Now, a promised dash of personal fandom experience. There is a certain franchise that I'm not going to name now where the developers of the reboot constantly demonstrated disdainful and disrespectful treatment of the original games. Calling the protagonist shallow, undeveloped and two dimensional until they, the supposed "progressive saviors", came along and "fixed" said protagonist. The entire backstory and personal history of the character ended up being re-written to cater to modern mainstream tropes and passed off as "woke" for said reason. Furthermore, the new version of the character is being framed by both the developers and the fandom as more "complex" because of their suffering (a classic example of treating pain rather than joy, enthusiasm, inspiration and productive bonds with people as a "character building force" - a pattern modern media is plagued by).

That's not what happened to Gow(R) at all and that alone is worthy of appreciation. Gow(R) creators not only acknowledge Kratos's past and experiences in the Greek Saga and make constant references to it but they have him face consequences (mostly emotional) of said past. They also have him work towards healthier way of dealing with the Greek saga events which in itself is revolutionary and, in fact, not at all mainstream writing. Mainstream media doesn't just romanticize character's pain (as noted above) but treats it as a mandatory part of character's growth.

Even in Gow18 Kratos isn't clinging to bitterness and suffering in order to keep going - he chooses to, at that stage, emotionally distance himself from traumatic experiences, past and present; he places all the value on "here and now". Even if he needs to repress his turmoil and remorse in the process. Said technique he also tries to teach to Atreus, as a way of coping and surviving ("Close your heart to it"). Because, as Kratos himself points out, it's either them or us. It is definitely an unhealthy way of dealing with issues but an acceptable one in those circumstances and at that point of his life. When he's just been confronted with another loss (Faye's death) and has to reconnect with the son he's been pushing away also because he wants to protect Atreus from the consequences of his checkered past and himself from facing the pain of more potential loss (if not physical then emotional).

Then comes GowR which, instead of romanticizing character's pain and Walls TM (as modern media tends to do), has Kratos openly recognize his avoidance coping mechanics, let alone forcing them upon Atreus, were self destructive and needed to be reconsidered. Instead of a yet another "woke", mainstream, pseudo-edgy plot about supposed "healing" and "character building" qualities of pain and suppression of emotions Kratos and the narrative acknowledge there is nothing progressive or powerful about pain and emotional walls ("and yet we love despite the inevitable"). That expressing your grief and remaining true to your moral priorities and empathy is essential to preserving your individuality and agency. Regardless (and it's the most revolutionary part for modern media) of person's gender.

The "open your heart to their suffering" line has Kratos once again admit he has to move on from unhealthy but socially acceptable ways of surviving.

The "most powerful survives" is how the society suppresses individuality and breeds bigotry; the acceptance of said idea is being perpetuated by media under the guise of "strength and independence" for both male and female characters. That's precisely why modern "feminist icons" are the girlboss types who don't challenge the power system but conform to it and simply take the power from men so they could oppress and conquer instead.

In that vein, Freya could've very easily been reduced to the above pseudo-"feminist" stereotype. She could've been a yet another "broken walled up woman" cliche, one whose character is supposed to be forged by pain, strife and fighting for survival after the men in her life caused her grief (another mainstream trope and the only type of development women in the media are allowed these days - where they are defined by A) pain and B) men's actions causing said pain).

Yet, that doesn't happen either. Freya gets to let go of her anger fairly early on in GowR and start her healing journey alongside Kratos, a male lead whom she blamed for her recent suffering. She gets to recognize not only her own wrongdoings and toxic actions (towards Baldur which, admirably, were not glossed over) but overcome, literally and figuratively, the consequences of Odin's abuse and not let it limit her; again, literally and figuratively.

Even more notable is that Freya does so with Kratos's help (both physically and emotionally; during the "Freya's missing peace" side-quest she actively asks for his emotional support - "would the God of few words led me his ear now and again?"). Which is no less revolutionary for modern media that doesn't allow women and men to be on equal footing for the sake of girlboss moments; modern feminism is patriarchy in disguise, same dynamic of dominance and submission except with a woman in the dominant position - and GowR challenged that stereotype as well.

All of the above is the opposite of preaching to the audience or bending to mainstream demands pressure: it's going up against some of the most toxic mainstream stereotypes and doing it in a completely in character way, maintaining continuity.

No less important is Atreus's agency in Gow18 and GowR, be it his personal free will as an individual or his experience as Kratos's son who got to reconnect with his estranged father due to a traumatic event (loss of his mother). Most media completely strips children of agency in terms of their rocky and complicated relationship with their parents. Western media in particular has been, for decades, perpetuating a harmful idea that children are under the obligation to "love their parents no matter what" just because they're parents and even if they are toxic and/or neglectful.

Yet again, Gow(R) deconstructs that toxic but also socially acceptable stereotype by allowing Gow18 Atreus to show how he feels about Kratos's avoidance of him. The narrative goes as far as to present a scene in which Kratos (if I remember that moment correctly though chances are I'm missing some details as it's been awhile since I played Gow18) gets to hear Atreus's thoughts about Kratos dying being a preferable scenario for him instead of Faye's death which has actually occurred. The framing of that scene is possibly the most refreshing and unique for the way parent/child relationships have been handled in popular media before or since. Unlike 99.9 percents of Western products which would've handled that plot point as Atreus being a "misguided child who needs to learn to appreciate his loving neglectful parent" this scene is NOT in any way used against Atreus. His feelings are not in any way invalidated. For one, those are the thoughts that Atreus doesn't vocalize to Kratos himself directly and of free will (as the supposed "misguided child" cliche would've done in any other American game, show or movie).

Secondly, immediately after those emotions of Atreus are established and received by Kratos Atreus goes back on what he didn't even say but rather thought in a moment of pain and grief; and clarifies he does not actually mean it. That what he really wants is for Kratos to bond with him and be honest with him which Kratos hasn't been for Atreus's entire life, both in terms of emotional bonding and the truth about his God background. The scene doesn't put Atreus, a neglected and lied to child (lied to by both of his parents by omission, mind you), to shame.

Back in Gow18 Kratos's over protection towards his son on one hand and distancing from Atreus on the other had short term consequences in the form of Atreus losing the sight of his individuality and morals upon finding out about his half-deity heritage. Instead of Atreus being made to feel "guilty" about not accepting his "loving but neglectful TM" father he is made to deal with the traumatic situation and the new information in his own way even if it's not a pretty way nor convenient for his father. Even more important is that when Atreus regained himself in every sense he felt horrified by what he did to Modi not because he disappointed his father but because, paraphrasing, it is not who HE is. Thus once again the narrative put emphasis on Atreus's individuality.

GowR provides an outstanding continuity of that before and especially in the Ironwood segment. Not only have Kratos and Atreus become no less close by that point than Atreus was with Faye before her death (in a way even closer because Atreus got to know his father from scratch at a more conscious age and without the benefit of romanticized childhood nostalgia). But Kratos doesn't actively prevent Atreus from learning up on his Giant heritage, even though he is - understandably - frustrated and hurt that Faye kept that and many other things from them.

When Atreus finds himself in Ironwood it's the first time where he gets to have the full measure of self expression and agency. All of his choices there are made under no pressure and just because he feels like it in the current moment. Angrboda, who has spent years in isolation and loneliness, believing her destiny is defined by the prophesy which stated she is meant to transfer the information and giant souls to Loki and be forgotten by him no matter what she does (and no matter how she feels about him) always and infallibly respects all of Atreus's choices throughout that part. Even when they go directly against said prophesy. She asks him each time whether he is ready for the next reveal of information or even whether he is comfortable to be called by his own name or a "champion of Jotunns". When he isn't Angrboda either complies with his wishes - shouldering the responsibility for giant marbles (despite it being the opposite of what her late mother told her was meant to happen), calling him Atreus instead of Loki when he asks her to - or turns a stressful situation into a lighthearted one, as to diminish the burden and share the weight of new duties with him (such as when she playfully calls him "Champ" numerous times).

As Atreus is confronted with the prospect of losing his father and tries to deal with it emotionally Angrboda - just like Gow18 narrative before - does not invalidate his feelings. She concludes that he "cares for his dad so much he can't conceive of a world where HE'd let [Kratos] get hurt". It's not just a parallel to Gow18 Atreus entertaining the scenario of dealing with Kratos's death better than with Faye's. Once again the value, by both Angrboda and the story, is placed upon Atreus's personal agency and his response to the situation (and with it comes a constant recognition of Angrboda's agency - "your part is as big as you want it to be" - which she goes on to exercise immediately after Atreus leaves Ironwood when she sets out to look for more marbles and "defy destiny").

Concerning Faye, admittedly, I'm delighted that someone else holds the same conflicting view of not even her character itself but the way she was framed by the narrative. Faye, sadly, fell a victim to fandom's new unwritten rule that dictates you have to have a "woke" reason to dislike a character, no matter how ridiculous and invented said reason might be. That's where the accusations of her being a "fridged" woman trope are stemming from despite said characteristic having nothing to do with her canon storyline. People cannot acknowledge that Faye, as you note, wasn't developed enough before she wasn't meant to exist in the current timeline. Hence why they attempt to justify their disappointment with her character's lack of exposure with "progressive and feminist" arguments. Which obviously are not feminist at all because those same people do not hold Brok to the same standard. Although in HIS case it would be fair to say he ended up being fridged for Sindri's angst and potential dark arc.

But women are not allowed to just exist, they have to justify their existence in the story and the treatment of Faye in the fandom is another example of that. I admit, her relationship with Kratos is the part of the story I have issues with because of how idealized it was despite obvious problematic elements in it (Faye's dishonesty with Kratos and the dishonesty of them both with Atreus). While Kratos was allowed to voice his anger and frustration with the secrets she'd kept, ultimately, his emotions ended up being brushed under the rug due to the positive influence Faye had on him. That's one of the few complaints I consider valid about GowR.

However, once again, the above would not have been an issue if the genders were reversed and Faye wasn't a female character who committed a "crime" of dying before the main events of the story.

To sum up my own "novel", it's important to always analyze media as a product/story in it's own right regardless of whether it reflects your personal experiences or not. It is definitely difficult to do, but it's important if one wants their media engagement to be fulfilling.

Once again, thank you for sharing your thoughts and for the chance to talk about Kratos in particular.

[javaghoul]

Uuuuh idk I guess off of that, when people relate to him because he's "hard" or "tough" or "cool" I always feel really. Weird.

I know a lot of people relate to him because he's severely traumatized and still pushing through. A lot of people want to be glorified like he does. That's fine - that's their prerogative. But I can't see you as cool or even edgy if you relate to him, yanno? He gets reduced to his aesthetics a lot and while I understand the ghoul perception of him (which is similar to some of these peoples'), we as an audience get to see him much deeper than that. Focusing only on the things he's doing that Look Cool and not breaking them down or comparing them to him as a character is always such a loss to me. I feel like a lot of the people I meet - esp IRL - that like TG often don't understand it, they just think Kaneki is cool and tragic, and THEY wanna be cool and tragic, yanno?

It's their business - idc what kind of person u are or u project urself to be. I'm more mourning the characterization of Kaneki himself as I watch it get twisted into this super cool super powered edgelord who's ONLY cold and detached now. A coldblooded killer who doesn't care about anything. A lone wolf.

No... No no no. It's cool you see yourself that way but you're SO missing the point with him. Projecting that onto him is doing this pansy such a disservice 😭 If you met him in person you'd hate him, you'd think he's a whiny bitch (cuz he is lowkey)

- Same anon as last time. 👽

yay hi again Alien Anon 👽

I haven't met anyone in real life who feel that they hugely relate to any of the Kanekis' (or spoken to anyone online who do), so I can't really agree or disagree with what you've said. I can believe it happening though. I have noticed that Kaneki will get thrown in with lots of other anime characters that fit into the aesthetics as you called it, when he seems like the outlier of said group (possibly because I'm more familiar with his story idk). When Kaneki is mentioned outside the TG fandom, it's a very specific evolution of him that is talked about: Post-aogiri, pre-interacting with touka again kaneki, with no mention of his background, who he was, and who he becomes.

How do you feel about him being compared to Ayato?

I've always seen Kaneki as a vehicle for the real story of Tokyo Ghoul rather than it being HIS story. He isn't a character that I think I'd get along with in real life despite having things in common with him (being orphaned, let down by family etc) and I can't imagine a much younger me ever relating/idolising him in any sort of way as -like you said- he's kinda whiny, silly, and pathetic at times.

I mean, he gets there in the end, but he takes several country miles in getting there.

This is me reaching, but maybe people like to relate to him because they like the turning point where Kaneki stops giving a shit and starts getting fighty about it. He's spent his life getting treated like crap, then he has the enough is enough moment and takes it out on the world. I think there's people that daydream about being able to do that. Could it be a bit of wish fulfillment?

You put things more eloquently than I did, so I don't think I contributed anything, but thanks for writing this! I feel that Kaneki is an off-limits character to criticize so it's refreshing when someone expresses a different opinion on him.

Oh and to add, you said people perceive him as tough: I've never seen him as tough lol, survivor definitely. But then my definition of "tough" is having shit things happen to you and not allowing it to completely change you/your life (for the worst) if that makes sense, so that's a personal thing

[alpaca-clouds]

For those of us who've not touched bg3 but are a fan of sexy vampires...Could you give a quick rundown on Astarion? Or is his lore too extensive?

Sure enough.

I will put this under a cut, though, for those who do not want to be spoiled. (Now I? I totally spoiled myself for the part of the plot I have not reached because with work my plaing has gotten slow.)

So, Astarion is one of your main companions in the game. The very, very short of the game set up (in terms non-DnD-players can understand): You got kidnapped by tentacle monsters who put a tadpole into your brain that is gonna turn you into a tentacle monster as well. Through circumstances you escape the tentacle monsters though before you can be turned and now try to get the tadpole out of your brain before you can grow said tentacles.

Now, your main companions all have the same issue. So does Astarion. You meet him soon after escaping the tentacle monsters. He appears to be an elf, some of your companions note he is a bit pale, but at least my very stupid bard was like: "He looks perfectly fine to me."

But of course you are gonna find him nibbling on your neck sooner or later. And from there on you find out a bit about him.

Now, this sad, sad vampire has been stabbed 200 years ago on the streets of Baldur's Gate, upon which he was found by a vampire. Cazador. Cazador was like: "You can die or you can allow me to turn you into a vampire." And Astarion wanted to live. So he allowed himself to be turned.

But Cazador only turned him into a vampire spawn. (Explanation: In DnD it is a weird mix. Vampires can turn you by just biting you, but until you drink their blood you are only vampire spawn, giving your vampire sire a lot of control over you.)

Cazador is the most horrible, shittiest asshole to ever have walked under this sky. He proceeded to take this poor vampire man who was now under his control and tortured him, raped him, prostituted him, abused him, and at times even used mind control to make Astarion torture himself. According to Astarion Cazador liked his screams so much.

Boy, I am looking forward to killing Cazador. (Or rather letting Astarion do the deed.)

Now, Astarion's character quest mostly involves the fact that Cazador carved something into his back. You will find out, that it is basically a spell that is meant to sacrifice Astarion and his vampire spawn siblings in a ritual so that Cazador can through that gain powers no other vampire has ever had before.

And boy, Astarion is so sad and traumatized and I just wanna hug him and tell him everything is gonna be alright, okay?

The game really managed to gut punch me, before I got spoiled.

See, if you do the romances, it is very dependend on the character how quick you get to a sexy time scene. In the case of Astarion the romance quest starts with him offering you sex. So me, horny as I am, was like: "Yay, let's fuck the sexy vampire." Only to then later learn of his tragic backstory and figure out that the reason he offers you sex that early is, that he never had anyone look out for him before and had thought it was conditional on him offering sex. And I was like: "Oh. Oh baby. Oh baby. I am sorry. Q-Q"

But he is really well written.

Not to spoil too much here, but for the first two acts he is like a very abrasive asshole. Because he is in full survival mode and he does not understand what is going on and all that. And all he ever knew was cruelty and violence. So he thinks that it is the only way to act. But if you are playing a good, heroic character he is slowly gonna come around to you. And he slowly is gonna start to believe that indeed you are being good because you are good and not because you have some greater goal. And then in Act 3 the sweetest thing happens, when you are nice and he suddenly... is also acting nice. It is just so sweet.

But yeah, I wanna hug him and hold him and kiss him and make everything alright. And I will probably spend a good while writing healing fics for him.

[stardustizuku]

I have never vibe with an MLB critic essay so hard as yours do. People put salt on a lot of different things of MLB, but you hit every point of that really hits home of why the show is a dissapointment for me; from the Love Square wasted potential, the expectation of a Magical Girl show that wasn't delivered, the messy incoherent themes that is not represented well in their powers or villains, the umbalance power dynamics complete with comparison.

Too bad you drop it though (reasonably), I really wish to read what you think of Sentimonster!Adrien or even the Finale.

Something interesting happens when I completely give up on a show. And that's that...I really stop expecting anything from it.

When the Sentimonster thing came out, I genuinely just sighed. I couldn't even form an opinion because all I could feel is "this is such wasted potential".

The idea of a child being created via an object - and having said object tied to them, is such a good one. And it raises so many interesting and profound ideas. It could speak about how parents see their kids as nothing but dolls. It could be a very cool concept of Adrien someone who has the power to DESTROY, not only having a gentle soul but having to protect this object.

All things get presented to us for a reason - even if that reason is purely aesthetics.

Why are the girls in Tokyo Mew Mew animals? Because the creator thought catgirls were cool.

Why do we have witches in madoka? Because witches are the evolved form a "girl with magic" aka a "magical girl". And that's a cool thought.

Why is the Princess Tutu inspired by the swan lake ballet and why does it chose "defying destiny" as it premise? Because in real life, the swan lake ballet has multiple endings, some tragic, some happy. The tragedy aspect of it, enhances the princess tutu aesthetic.

Why was Adrien introduced to us as a Sentimonster?

And that's the thing. I can't even wrap my head around why would you make that creative choice.

It's an interesting idea, but one that feels more rooted on someone seeing a headcanon of it online and trying to pander to the audience with it. A sort of torture porn (which in a vacuum isn't something I'm opposed to), just to hammer home how shitty Adrien's life is. How abusive his dad is. Which, btw, doesn't even make sense when you think abt how he got redeemed in the recent episodes.

My point is, I can't have an opinion on "Adrien being a sentimonster" because I can't see why. Why they did it. And my lack of interest in the series, makes it so that I don't wanna spend pondering the "why".

What's the point? What themes did it introduce? Does it tie to the miraculous stuff somehow? Does it coherently expand upon the known lore?

Like, Katherine from Genshin Impact - it recently got revealed she's a doll controlled by the Fatui. This serves the purpose of allowing Nahida, an extremely kind archon, to have a vessel she can control. It shows insight of Marionette's powers, and how likely the adventurer's guild is to be related to the Fatui or Snezhnayan politics, as well as have an in-game reason as to why there's a Katherine in each region.

While it's also an out of left field bonkers thing getting revealed, it MAKES SENSE. There's a reason why she was made this way.

But with Adrien, there isn't. It's just /there/. Not really related to anything, no foreshadow, or anything. This is all, obviously, tied to the terrible writing of the show. But this is just insane. I do not understand it. I seriously can't.

[gleppy]

What are your stats on MD ships?

What are your otps, ships that you like, those that you are neutral towards, your guilty pleasures, crack ships and NOTPs?

well, it should go without saying that nuzi and vizzy are my ships to end all ships, never budging on them. and i don't think i've been able to adequately express how insane i am about supernova, but boy oh BOY am i insane about supernova. doomed old woman yuri ftw. i also think jessa is adorable, but my opinion on whether or not they should actually be a thing changes based on context. like, if we're talking about canon? angsty one-sided (or mutual) pining that never actually goes anywhere is the way to go. human au or drone!tessa au? they need to make out sloppy style ASAP. istg supernova and jessa are THE most painful and tragic md ships (3nvy who) but i'm a bit of a masochist when it comes to yuri. who else am i gonna think about while crying and listening to chappell roan?

i guess this is my official coming out post: i'm a vuzi enjoyer on the dl. if it's not obvious from my fic, i'm also partial to j/doll and thad/emily. i originally wasn't going to ship j, doll, or thad with anyone because i didn't want to go down the "pair the spares" route or ship just for the sake of shipping (something i HATE) but the more i thought about it the more the ships made sense, plus i feel like they actually do contribute to the story in a meaningful way. idk, i can elaborate on this if anyone wants me to.

i worry sometimes that my stance on supernova makes me come across as not liking khori but i do like them! i just feel like i can't really do much with a ship that's A) already canon and B) was established before the show even started so we didn't actually get to see them develop. so i guess it's less that i "ship" khori and more that i appreciate their relationship for what it is.

as for the ships i don't have super strong opinions on one way or the other: i guess doll/lizzy would be one of them? their dynamic is just a bit boring to me, but if i'm reading a fic and they show up i'm not gonna be mad about it. i used to go cuckoo loco for oilrose before i decided to start taking a walk on the vizzy side of life but now that i've written them as blood siblings for tiny angels i literally cannot see their dynamic any other way. not saying they canonically have a sister dynamic, it's just how i personally see them. more power to those who do like the ship though, even i can admit that the fight scene in episode 8 was extremely lesbian-flavoured. lately thadzi has been falling into this category as well despite me having previously despised them. i don't think i could ever personally see them as anything other than buddies, but i'm beginning to somewhat understand the appeal of them romantically. i'm never going to ship them but they don't make me wanna break things anymore. not an oilrose or thadzi shipper but i believe in their beliefs

crackships: don't have any. and before you come at me, joll is NOT a crackship, they're a rarepair. people in fandom these days do not understand the difference between a crackship and a rarepair and it makes me mad.

as for my notps: i REALLY don't like it when people ship main characters with random side characters that have one or two lines of dialogue. maybe i'm the pot calling the kettle black because i wrote thad/emily into my fic, but shit like... i dunno, n x rebecca or v x braiden pisses me off. i had my initial reservations about including joll and thadmily in my fic for this exact reason but i ended up conceding because i felt like i was able to write them in in a way that made sense AND actually added a layer of depth to the story, the characters, and the characters' dynamics with one another. most of the time when i read a fic and a random rarepair like this shows up, it's so out of nowhere and was obviously just hastily thrown in there because the author felt like everyone HAD to be shipped with someone and it's just... bad. let people be single ffs.

and sorry to all my vh4d and 3nvy followers/mutuals, but those DO make me want to break things. not sorry to my c0deg0ld followers though, fuck y'all.

[acaciapines]

so....abt that adventure time daemon au....sits down with folded hands. im SO SO curious as to what your thoughts are and lowkey wondering if theyre anything like what ive been cooking up in my twisted mind...slash joke...YOU GO FIRST I WANNA KNOW!!

jkdfgdjfkg yeah im gonna focus on the fionna + cake aspects since thats what i posted but if you wanna know about someone else send a followup!! i have the strongest ideas for marceline and more scattered thoughts on everyone else but!! i turn this around in my head a lot lol.

under the cut bc i am incapable of being short

so. the reason fionna world is Like It Is despite nominally being a human au is bc i decided that in ooo, humans are the only people with daemons! everyone else has Something Else, but that something else isnt actually a daemon (this bit is still fuzzy lol since it would just be more bg in anything i write).

so that means the only characters in adventure time who have/had a daemon are finn (tossing around the name honey for her?? shes unsettled but mostly dogs bc they grew up with dogs lol), marceline (she lost her daemon upon becoming a vampire, gets her back at the end of stakes. do not ask me what she is settled as idk as of now lol), and simon (lost her upon becoming ice king, he does Not get her back. i think its fun if she is a penguin bc that makes ice king surrounding himself w penguins super tragic. he knows something is gone but cannot articulate what.)

also i guess people like susan strong and the humans on the human island but shhhh i dont have super strong ideas for them lol.

ALL THAT TO SAY. since fionnaworld was created by prismo (gonna be real idk what his deal is but he is obviously His Own Thing and as a deity type deal he probably is granted w 'can see dust' powers and thus has no idea what daemons are all about) and lives in ice kings/later simons head (one who doesnt know about daemons and one who is mourning the permanent loss of his own) when fionna and cake were "created" finn jake and finn's daemon were mashed into two characters, who are! human and daemon.

everyone else either never had a daemon in normal ooo (ex. pb) or didnt have them at the time fionnaworld was created and thus they werent carried over (ex. marceline.) of everyone tho probably marshall WOULD know the most, this is why he has a line in my fic where he's like, do you know what i'd do for a weird cat? as a sort of hint that he SHOULD have a daemon, but. alas.

uhhh. where am i going with this.

OH RIGHT so yeah basically when fionnaworld became de-magicked it took with it a lot of people's points of connection--everyone ends up way more isolated than they were. since simon is mourning his own daemon that translates to daemons just Not Existing, and so fionna and cake are very much isolated from each other. they dont have the words for their relationship. all fionna knows is she needs cake with her, and vice versa.

cake IS still a daemon, but without that framework shes stuck in the 'normal cat' role even though she does a lot of noncatlike things, n her and fionna are very very good still at sorta knowing what the other is thinking and reacting accordingly. the people closest to fionna (so, really just marshall and gary lol) have SOME idea of what is up but if asked its more leftover instinct than like, the ability to actually explain any of this. fionna and cake try to interact w the world as a human-daemon pair but that doesnt work when the world has no fucking idea what that is.

uh. that. probably answers some question!! i think the plot of fionna and cake itself is MOSTLY the same...really fionna and cake just find out there is a word for who they are to each other n get that relationship reestablished which isnt a far cry from canon. i really like the stuff they do with betty/simon so i wouldnt want to change that, though i imagine there is a bit of simon mourning his lost daemon too--idk i feel like you could tie those feelings in if you were to write a full adaptation but i!! dont think enough changes to do that so i wont be lol.

i mostly just wanted to do episode one bc again. daemon in a world that doesnt know wtf a daemon is. truly the funniest and most tragic thing in the world.

[fruitsofhell]

[still talking about this but i feel like this would be lost if it was just a reblog addendum]

For real my greatest regret with my time in this fandom is not finding enough people who talk about Kirby STORIES nor doing that enough myself. Like its always kinda just between "ah my adorable and/or tragic blorbos" and "MOST FUCKED UP KIRBY LORE!" as I've complained about 100 billion times now, but I really wanna talk about the evolution of the series' storytelling under Kumazaki's direction more and how you can really feel them finding their footing on What Kirby "Lore" Means.

Ever since Robobot the games have tackled more direct themes and science fantasy tropes and it's also when it's really started coming into it's own. Return to Dreamland and Triple Deluxe and wonderful but you can see where the team holding back on detail and leaning into more cliche platformer-y things didn't let them reach full potential. Robobot and KatFL on the other hand excel at the more sci-fi themeing because they really let that more out there stuff absorb into the fabric of the gameplay and visuals, and while I've touched on KSA not being as lush as those other two, it makes up for it with sheer volume of content in the end. Evil cults are more fantasy than sci-fi so it didn't have ideas as extreme as those other two to latch onto, but it could still be more purposeful with the levels in the middle yknow. But still, the writing of the Jamba and the design of Void Termina have a lot packed into them that make it work once you unpack it.

RTDL and Tripluxe you can maybe say theres like a theme of greed in a nebulous sense, but it is genuinely fluffy platformer fair with an interesting villain thrown in at the end, Robobot, KSA, and KatFL are like actual great sci-fantasy stories wrapped up in fairytale-like bow. RTDL and Tripluxe become good when you fill in blanks*, but the last 3 just Are Good, Straight Up*.

*I know some of you people out there think pause screens are supplementary but it is literally The Game's Text, so I mean good with the pause screens.

Like Kirby "Lore" HAS gone from What If There Was A Platformer Villain But Really Fucked Up to actual really cool commentaries on imperialism/industrialization, bonds and religion, and life. I think its really fucking cool and what actually has kept me a Kirby fan. I can find a platformer that gets really complicated the more you look into it's flavor text, or one with cute character designs, or sad moments, but you don't find one so often that like cares. That really cares about the characters and the world and stuff, but about saying something confidently. Kirby storytelling may not come off as confident to people because it's not overt, but the confidence is in the details that surround and support those ideas that in any other series would just be pedantic "lore".

Like Robobot doesn't have "lore" about Susie and Haltmann, it has a backstory complimenting a power struggle in the plot's climax that ties into the idea of imperialism being a cannibalistic pursuit. Star Allies doesnt have "lore" about doomsday cults and gods, it has a story about how real bonds and connections can form even in dark places and its important to cherish those and not let circumstances corrupt them (or something, it has been a whilehgjh). And KatFL doesnt have "lore" about ooooo all the humans are dead this IS THE DAHKEST KIRBY GAME!! Its fucking aboyut how animals and joy and whimsy will reinherit the earth!

im justfuskdgs WHOS DOING THE KIRBY LITERARY ANALYSIS?? Where are they? They have to be out there im so fr ghsf

[x1e3ju]

another rant: my tumblr era has started i feel withdrawals…

i might not finish this so if it gets posted. something won but drawing most definitely did not ToT anywho this is in fact another persona rant! im fixated on kingdom hearts pretty heavily now but i still hold persona very very dear to me as we now dhskd im here to rant about the aigis and yukari, this wont be as in depth as last rant but hey its worth a try and its been on my mind why not

thinking about aigis’ character and everything about her character down to her bisexuality really makes me wish they explored her humanity more. i know she wasn’t an allegory really or anything of that sort just more of a “plot device” of sorts to help handle the theme of appreciating your humanity and living and all that. but i love her so much so yes, as indulgent as it is, i want to explore that for her hehe. since i played the game and my fixation and love for aigis had commenced, ive always sorta shipped her with yukari i guess? because i think they would really nice together lmao and also because i think there’s so much potential between a dynamic like that between the two of them.

i was working on a fanfic idea and i had written some stuff i really liked but in short the idea was about aigis and yukari and how their relationship would develop during the answer time or after the events of the main game basically and how they would deal with makoto’s death in a rather odd manner to say. mind you, ive never seen the answer dlc and knew very little about it so i sort of didn’t include that specific time but anywho, no matter all that, the point of in short is that aigis and yukari only really find that sort of sense of “love” in each other because they both remind each other of makoto. i know that sounds probably insane and i don’t really like writing about gay couples and just focusing it so much on societal standards or like in sapphic relationships for example, i don’t like the fact so many are based around men and comphet and all that but i feel that this would be such an issue for how aigis and yukari would navigate their lives afterwards, as of course it would be, i think it has a lot of potential to be discussed and i know atlus would never state it the way that i think it would look but just in the friends way and not in the jealous “he was mine!!” way, its so ridiculous bc again, i havent seen it myself but i know its handled so horribly i dont even wanna imagine. ill see it eventually ToT

but anywho, i think their relationship has a lot of potential to be explored. just the ship dynamic in general and aigis having to handle teen emotions lmao. i think her being extremely awkward and learning the concept of embarrassment would be hilarious i mean mostly tragic but in a way, it’s something that could speak to a lot of people. and i know the game didn’t have time to really explore that and i think surprisingly they did pretty well with what they did with aigis and just that game in general (the first and last time lmao) but im just saying whatever yk fhsjfb

i just wish more media expanded on what toxic relationships genuinely are. i wish more ppl thought critically and realized the very thin but visible line between toxic and abusive and didn’t either glorify or exaggerate it so much yk? like i wish more media discussed mutually toxic relationships and actually didn’t put such a disgusting narrative like they always do especially with gay women and sapphic couples. just for the fetish it’s absolutely disgusting just like with gay men and the power dynamics its like… why. why are we missing the point here how do we manage to make the same mistakes everytime ToT i like aigis and yukari as a ship because its something that already in itself is a bit questionable to say the least and it could really feed off well on that differentiation between their humanity you know? and also handling grief but realizing that its the same and they both need to let go you know? it’s like even with yukari and mitsuru, i wish more people didn’t treat them like “aww cute gay girl couple from persona 3!! yass lesbians diversity win!!” and actually thought on the WAY bigger picture that their relationship is and just how messy and complicated and tbh, really unfortunate it would be. although i do think that mitsuru and yukari would probably “be together” late in the future like probably reconnect late 20s or smth but it would all have to be secret and still, mitsuru would never be able to really be with her due to the company and marrying off and all that. and just with mitsuru’s avoidant personalty and a bit of nativity and i personally headcanon yukari with bpd or just a more emotionally based personality disorder so those leading factors would probably make their relationship to actually come to fruition so difficult

ok i was going to finish this and ill still post it but my head hurts so bad rn i hate playing kingdom hearts the graphics are miserable omg.. so ima head to sleep at only 3 am like a loser.. goodnight to the dust under the bed and alsoooo

goodnight too to the inspo for today’s rant.. i was finally able to get my hands on a baby aigis and she has arrived and im so happy i feel like a father right now… even the box has naorise tooo like fjskfjr♪٩(๑>ꇴ< ๑)و ♪ …you all better say goodnight to my child im looking at you too dust bunnies dont think i forgot

[greensagephase]

Okay, so! Part 14? Amazing oh my god… Am I picking up that Harry might’ve played a roll in some previous parts or am I crazy? Stay tuned. Anyways, AAAA I love these two so much. Even the little hint about Peter looking at them almost like a family. You put so much imagery and psychology into these chapters and I eat it up every fricken time!!!

I was going to ask to possibly make a few suggestions for music to add to the playlist. Obviously music is subjective but like… Hear me out 🥹

Almost (Sweet Music) by Hozier:

So in the case you haven’t listened to this song, absolutely give it a go. It’s about a man slowly falling in love with someone who reminds him of an ex or a past lover(?) and how good it feels to slowly be himself again. Lowkey I relate this song to Y/N because there’s just certain aspects about Miguel in this fic that also align with their universes Peter. Especially the whole staring thing mentioned in this chapter, how Miguel always looks at Y/N like Peter did, and Y/N smiles the same way that they did with Peter about Miguel. These lyrics especially!

The same kind of music

Haunts her bedroom

I’m almost me again

She’s almost you

And

I wouldn’t know where to start

Sweet music playing in the dark

Be still my foolish heart

Don’t ruin this on me

—

Ghost of Chicago by Noah Floersch

So I feel like this one once it’s listened to kinda speaks for itself but it definitely kinda sounds like how I would imagine Miguel would feel falling into this friendship / situationship / relationship. Because it starts off as that slow and staccatoed tempo before building up to tempo and suddenly it’s like he sees this person everywhere, not literally but metaphorically. Being able to associate this person with so many little things in life.

—

Francesa by Hozier

Last one, and currently it’s a bit of a stretch. However, hear me out. This song if you don’t know (and I apologize for explaining so much but I wanna be thorough, I’m sure you’ve listened to Hozier but y’know) Is about a man being so in love that he would endure the struggles in life all over again if he could be with his lover once again, and that their love is so powerful it is not meant for a place like heaven. This to me is a perfect ending song for Miguel x Y/N because! There has been so much of a build up, in this whole process I feel like by the end of it, Miguel would absolutely live the life he was given once more if it meant being with Y/N once more. Every single tragic event would be worth the pain because of the sheer love he would experience in the end.

Anyways I’m done, this is way too long but AAAA I love you and your writing and I just had to yap about it 😭🤍

Hi, Rue!!!! I'm so happy you enjoyed part 14!! 🥹 About Harry… I can't say anything, but I'm seriously loving everyone's thoughts on him, hehe! 🤣 Omg, I'm glad you've mentioned the part where Peter B. looks at Miguel and reader with Mayday!!!!! I WAS HOPING SOMEONE WOULD PICK UP ON THIS!!! For a few seconds, Peter B. definitely saw them as a little family - maybe a potential future 😌- and I just, AHHHH!!! It was one of my favorite scenes to write for sure from part 14!! 😭 I want them together already but I have to control myself!

About the music - Rue, you killed me with these songs suggestions and I LOVE that two of them are Hozier's!! It's actually insane you've suggested songs by him because the other day I was literally thinking about looking into his music to discover new songs for the fic since I know he's recently dropped new music. I'm not a hardcore fan but I enjoy a few of his songs and I LOVE his voice and he seems like a really chill and sweet artist, but anyway, I got very busy last week and never got to it, so this is perfect!!!

I listened to them and can I just say I absolutely LOVE "Almost (Sweet Music)" ?!? This one is def so fitting for Y/N in regards to her past love with Peter and the parallels between him and Miguel, and the way Y/N herself will slowly show these little parallels like smiling at Miguel the way she used to for Peter, too! And then the part,

"I wouldn't know where to start Sweet music playing in the dark Be still my foolish heart Don’t ruin this on me"

This fits both of them so perfectly - I won't say much but you basically put it together based on your thoughts on "Ghost of Chicago" 😭😭 anyway, I LOVE THIS SONG and I've added it to the future songs playlist along with the other two (in my nonpublic personal Spotify account which is just growing longer each day with the new music I find lol) and be assured that they'll show up in the official playlist when the time is right!! 😌

And the last songs!!!! Yes, yes, yes to your thoughts!! I can't wait to use these songs for our future Miguel in which he loses sleep no longer because of nightmares, stress, or overworking, but rather because of matters of the heart and that's all I'm going to say about that!!

Thank you so much for making these song suggestions, Rue!! If you have more, send them my way! I love listening to songs you guys relate to the fic - it's one of my fav things ever seriously!!

I hope you're doing well and thank you for sending this wonderful ask!!! 🤍🫶🏼

[swamp-gremlin]

My Old Nick hc's, interpretation, analysis, and other odd bits PT.1

Part 2

This is long overdue but I feel I oughta get something out of the way. I've had a incredibly aggressive special interest in him for like 3-5ish years and at some point in writing hc's I just started making shit up(I mean isn't that just hc's are?) because I really just took a guy with a whopping 14 lines of dialogue and just started sprinting.

I'm choosing to actually leave a few things out as I wish to explore those ideas more in This isn't over Jack, Ill probably swing back around to this after I wrap that up. In the mean time if you wanna swap ideas I'm down(please please please pleaseplea)

Turns out I hit text limit with this oh my lord, ill post pt2 tomorrow, i'm sorry

Can't think of anything particularly triggering in this but i'll warn it gets just kinda bleak

Human turned Fae- I will not elaborate, this will be explained later...

would actually break your legs if you called him a fairy

I've never actually pinned down any specific powers for him for some reason? like i just cant think of like any that i could write/ illustrate that wouldn't feel too gauche... So I just kinda nebulously imaged so weird fae-fuckery type of magic- though I think the most compelling interpretation of his powers was in Scouts Australian Christmas (pls go read it, its a really good fic)

Gay, but I cant imagine he's like particularly out about it; like its a iykyk sorta think because I definitely feel there probably some shame or internalized homophobia there (smth smth homophobic senator caught in a gay bar joke)

Autistic, but most definitely not diagnosed- he would become absolute incensed if you suggested it, like "There is nothing wrong with me, I am normal" but you can tell that he knows there's something "wrong with him" but he has no idea what and is incredibly afraid of even attempting to confront that

Can't imagine there's a moment where he's not masking, he doesn't understand his own limits and will keep doing things until he quite literally can't anymore

Probably has some ~effeminate~ interest he's deeply embarrassed by, but like in all reality its very normal and even if it was thats not a bad thing, he just makes it a big deal for no reason

STRADDLING the line between infodumping and mansplaining

Could be genuinely into a topic but he's just so condescending about it

High functioning alcoholic, kinda in that 50s/ rich way but it's very obvious he has a problem but everyone always brushes it off as "thats just how he is/ things are"

Nick could honestly just be summed up in his impact as a *a systematic bad thing happens again and again* "thats just how things are, get over it" sorta thing or a "Heart warming: student raises funds to prevent orphans from being sent to orphan grinder" and then no-one questions why the orphan grinder exists in the first place

He has been meticulously constructing his public image/ brand as "Old Nick"/ "The Spirit of Australian Christmas"

He is a liar, but he's a very good liar

His accent is fake, his laugh is fake, his public lore is fake and he's not even Australian he's British! (Which is arguably worst thing he has done)

He's basically been voice training to keep up a modern australian accent for years now, but his real accent is more of that 1700s british (which actually sounds different from modern a modern britsh accent) but sometimes he's has moments and his accent slips (mostly when he's yelling)

Has practiced his evil villain laugh so hard, like its a good villain laugh but if you listen hard you can tell its not real

Genuinely so fucking embarrassed by his actual laugh which i can only describe as if a goose that has been smoking a pack a day was being strangled to death

I kinda go back an forth on Nicks upbringing sometimes, because I kinda feel I went the kinda overplayed sorta tragic backstory; but also growing up in 1700s England was probably not fun if you weren't rich and also have you ever met a miserable boomer who does the whole "kids these days are too damn soft back when I was a kid *recounts an incredibly traumatizing event*!" Thing? Yeah he probably does that a lot and it makes everyone kinda uncomfortable

Maybe orphaned? Probably had brothers because he has strong younger brother "your oppressing me by giving me a task" energy (btw this relates to a super stupid hc that im not gonna share because its incredibly dumb)

Expressed a lot of attention seeking behavior from a young age, would purposefully get into trouble so someone would notice him

This behavior followed him into adult life and it would just keep getting worst and worst, like getting into bar fights that he would definitely lose and petty crime

Eventually he just kept ramping up the severity of his crimes till he actually had a warrant/ bounty placed for his arrest

To avoid getting arrested he became a sailor in his late 20s and jumped between ships and trades up until his 50s/60s

Eventually he was arrested and then get shipped off to Australia

After a few months he stuck there he was like "actually, fuck this" and started plotting an escape

He stole a boat and with his previous knowledge from being a sailor he was so full of himself he thought he did single-handedly sail and navigate back Britain or a British sympathetic colony and then lay low for the rest of his life

Of course he didn't happen and due to the fact he is stupid he got stranded in antarctic and the rest is history

If you wanna know how we got from "random crusty criminal" to "Spirit of Australian Christmas" you have to stick around for my shit ass comic and videos fucker

anyway where was i, Nick proceeded to twists that into "Yeah i totally meant to do discover antarctic, even though i was a 1780s peasant who would have not have even known that antarctic was even thing" he kinda sorta dropped the rest of it and made up more shit Homelander style

I don't believe that Nick was like well off in anyway when he was still mortal, and despite being just bludgeoned over the head with the effects of classism and a nightmare capitalist hell society he developed this horrible idolization of the rich and developed this almost "by your bootstraps" mentality but with like the brutality rich bushiness owners would treat there workers, where he though if he became horrible and ruthless he could trample and climb on the backs of his fellow men till he made it to that oh so coveted high society life.

probably doesn't help he would do absolutely anything for money either

and the thing is he made it, he's just unfathomably rich(that is till all those gambling debts catch up to him...) he got what he wanted, he got he's gotten all the money and attention he could have wanted... and yet he's miserable, nothing will ever be enough for him.

Throw back motif that's still my favorite- "decaying luxury". Nick is like obviously rich as fuck and yet just refuses to fix anything, like his sweater has so many little holes in it he just stopped bothering to fix, he's patched his pants so many times, stairs worn down to the point the rug is thread bear and the wood is dented, intricate arsenic and lead laced wallpaper that's now water damaged and peeling, his favorite chair's seams are ripped, and the stuffing and springs are just compressed and flat to the point its not even comfortable to sit in anymore. Like he can fix it, he has the money, and yet he just won't for some reason.

Oh speaking of arsenic and lead- mans is just absolutely FULL of lead, arsenic, asbestos, any other harmful thing the Victorians where just absolutely HUFFING

tangent on a tangent, i really associate him with the Victorian era despite him being born in the 1700s, maybe its the child labor, maybe its the stupid chops, he just looks like he should be in super tall neck-line and doing coke for a headache

Nick is just both incredibly self absorbed but also so fucking insecure, like very big insecure man makes his problems everyone else's problem and take his out on other people to feel better about himself energy

He's just so vain too, like i image he's just obsessed with himself and his image, probably doesn't help he's quite literately has been decomposing for like the last two centuries (IT WILL BE EXPLAINED WHY LATER I PROMMY) so he just has this like incredibly extensive Patrick Bateman ass self-care routine so he doesn't get moldy