#this quote will never not make me think of you

[turtlesandfrogs]

"Spare the rod, spoil the child" was quoted often in my household growing up. Well, here's what the rod (the belt, the wooden spoon, the switch & the open palm) taught me:

1. Never admit to any accident.

2. Never admit to any mistake.

3. If you can't meet an expectation, you'd better have a very good reason, and be able to tell it in a way that won't be seen as "an excuse" or be able to lie while looking utterly miserable so you're not questioned.

4. People in authority are not to be trusted and are to be avoided at all costs. Never tell the truth to any authority figure if it's anything less positive than "everything's great!"

5. If you have a dispute or fight with a peer, it's better to avoid telling an adult/authority figure because they'll just hurt you worse.

6. If you can sneakily fix a problem that's better than asking for help. Even if it's only a temporary solution- by the time it breaks again, it's less likely that people will realize you were involved.

So yeah, people who think they have well behaved kids because they spank- your kids don't trust you, and they're making sure you NEVER find out about a lot of things that you'd probably like to know about so you can help them. You're teaching them to be sneaky, to hide, and to expect punishment anytime anything goes wrong, even if it's a true accident. You're teaching them that it's more important to escape blame than to fix a problem or heal a hurt.

You're also teaching them that it's OK to hurt people who are weaker than you.

Were you ever spanked as a child AND do you think that spanking is ok?

[mcflymemes]

PROMPTS FROM WHEN HARRY MET SALLY *  assorted dialogue, adjust as necessary

i've been doing a lot of thinking, and the thing is, i love you.

i love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out.

i love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich.

i love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like i'm nuts.

i love that after i spend the day with you, i can still smell your perfume on my clothes.

i love that you are the last person i want to talk to before i go to sleep at night.

i came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.

i'll have what she's having.

would you like to have dinner?

i thought you didn't believe men and women could be friends.

when did i say that?

i mean, come on, who the hell are we kidding?

most women at one time or another have faked it.

they haven't faked it with me.

that's right. i forgot. you're a man.

what was that supposed to mean?

it is so nice when you can sit with someone and not have to talk.

marriages don't break up on account of infidelity. it's just a symptom that something else is wrong.

you realize of course that we could never be friends.

men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.

that's not true.

i have a number of men friends and there is no sex involved.

you only think you do.

they all want to have sex with you.

no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive.

i guess we're not going to be friends then.

you were the only person i knew in new york.

there are two kinds of women: high maintenance and low maintenance.

which one am i?

you're the worst kind.

you're high maintenance but you think you're low maintenance.

i just want it the way i want it.

you look like a normal person, but actually you are the angel of death.

don't you have a dark side?

when i buy a new book, i read the last page first.

if you could take him back now, would you?

why didn't he want to marry me?

what's the matter with me?

you're challenging.

i'm too structured. i'm completely closed off.

i drove him away.

how do you expect me to respond to this?

i'm leaving.

i don't have to take this crap from you.

what the hell does that have to do with anything?

are you finished now?

can i say something?

i'm sorry.

everybody thinks they have good taste and a sense of humor but they couldn't possibly all have good taste.

that is just like you.

you say things like that, and you make it impossible for me to hate you.

at least i got the apartment.

the first time we met, we hated each other.

we were friends for a long time.

it only took three months.

you will never have to be out there again.

i'm not going to tell you that.

i miss her.

you know what i miss? i miss the idea of him.

when did this happen?

you don't bounce back from that right away.

doesn't what i said mean anything for you?

i hate you, [name]. i really hate you.

what can i get you?

no one has ever quoted me back to me before.

you know, i'm so glad i never got involved with you.

i am not your consolation prize.

i wrote that.

you're going to have to try and find a way of not expressing every feeling that you have, every moment that you have them.

[leikeliscomet]

Sex repulsed, averse and indifferent asexuals are not harming you just for existing. Sex repulsed, averse and indifferent asexuals are not erasing you just for existing. Sex repulsed, averse and indifferent asexuals aren't stealing your representation just for existing. Sex repulsed, averse and indifferent asexuals are not puritans just for existing. Sex repulsed, averse and indifferent asexuals having the rights to not have sex, asserting indefinite refusal to sex, not having children, relationships and having full bodily doesn't have any negative impact on you.

I will always support sex favourable asexuals. I will always support asexuals right to wear what we want, asexual biological parenthood, asexuals in sex work and asexuals that enjoy sexual activities. To paraphrase Sherronda J Brown, I will always support every queer person's right to be a sexual being. But what I'll never support is compulsory sexuality. To paraphrase the rest of the quote, there must always, always, ALWAYS be the option to say no and the right to affirm that no. I'm noticing pushback from some, not all and i have to stress it's not everyone, sex favourable asexuals for simply asserting that no. This is compulsory sexuality. There's literally no other reason why another asexual in your community not having sex or not wanting to and asserting this makes you so upset. The idea it's sex favourable erasure or worse, puritanism for sex repulsed, averse and indifferent asexuals to state our unconditional right to exist with bodily autonomy including *yours* is compulsory sexuality. And this community isn't going anywhere till this shit is unpacked.

Im not gonna get into how and why I got into the ace community and why i care so much today but there's parts of sex favourable asexuality that I can't acess and parts of sex indifferent and sometimes repulsed asexuality that I need. And when you come to my page to decentre me in my own experience you are adding to the long list of shit in society that already makes sexuality difficult for aces like me.

When you assert that your participation in (heterosexual) sex makes you more normal, valuable or human than my ace experience and that that need to centre that participation you are fundamentally no different to every lesbophobe I've ever met, every Catholic puritan that's fantasised over my reproductive potential & every non ace cishet person that stigmatised my lack of sexual attraction to men.

When you treat me existing as a Black asexual as somehow regressive to your idea of sex positivity, especially as a white or non Black sex favourable ace, and have the need or frankly audacity to 'remind' me about having sex you are no different to every anti black racist ive ever known who claims Black girls are fast, thats shamed the Black girls of my community for having the inappropriate behaviour of wearing clothes on bodies they think aren't suitable and every non ace cishet person that's sexualised me since day.

And when you assert that sex repulsed, averse and indifferent asexuals, heavy on the repulsed, are bad representation, stereotypes, children, emotionless, robotic and sanitised you are fundamentally the same as those puritans you claim we are.

Stepping on the backs of the stereotypes, the childish, the frigid, the prudes, the sexless, the hags, the spinsters and the virgins you hate won't ever make you tall enough to reach the validation you think compulsory sexuality will offer you.

As long you as you have a knee jerk reaction to any repulsion, aversion or indifference alongside asexuality or simple terms, that asexuals being repulsed, indifferent or averse to sex is wrong, are the exact same as the 'allosexuals' you claim to hate on a regular basis.

It worries and pisses me off that i even have to say this but people are putting words in my mouth. Ace community, I mean this in the most direct way possible: Get your fucking shit together.

Merry Christmas.

[rrezshifts]

theodorian, the son set to inherit a multi-million dollar wine company, made headlines for bringing a date to a grecian celebration. it’s not common for the son of one of the richest men in athens to bring dates to these types of events. when he had though, it was his friends and clearly stated as such. most of the man’s quote-on-quote relationships, never made it past the bedroom according to gossip articles.

the last the public had heard of these relationships was through gossip that the man had found a new paramour, a different person than who theo is seen with now. however, the greek was said to have been seen leaving parties alone less than a week after that gossip came out. more weeks went by as social media pages were dry with any gossip on theo and who he may or may not be with.

now, not too long after the celebration, theo has come out as in a relationship with the date he brought that night. that date has no reports of being a long past partner of the man either. theo and this man have graciously agreed to do an interview on their relationship with me, in hopes of satiating the fans need for gossip and information.

< interviewer > hi! it’s great to meet the both of you!

< theo > you too!

<???> great to meet you too!

< interviewer > let’s start with what everyone wants to know, who are you?

<???> my name is chrysanthos of athens, you can just call me chrys though.

< interviewer > do we get any other information on who you are?

< chrys > um… go ahead.

< theo > he is an actor! and a damn good one. he’s so incredibly talented! he’s a kind man, caring, and determined. he’s also very honest and he’s a hard worker!

< interviewer > is that so?

< chrys > he’s better at describing me then i am. i gave him permission to answer those kind of questions before hand.

< interviewer > to start, theo is a well known name in greece, but especially in athens. did you know about him before you met?

< chrys > not much… i would see newspapers with his face on it and a headline talking about his love life. i had assumptions, but i didn’t think of those assumptions too much. i was more focused on my career, and i was never one for gossip.

< interviewer > did those assumptions affect your first time meeting him?

< chrys > *chuckles* very much so. i met him at his family’s party, i’m rarely invited to parties, especially ones this lavish and big. and i had caught him staring at me numerous times throughout the first couple hours of this party. i had assumed he wanted to sleep with me. so when he approached me, i was expecting confidence and boldness. but instead i was met with awkwardness and stammering. he shook my hand, introduced himself, and when i introduced myself back he said, and i quote “i know.” i raised an eyebrow at him and he rambled out an explanation before making up an excuse to run away. i was shocked to say the least.

< interviewer > do i get an explanation on how you knew chrys’ name?

< theo > why not! a week prior to this party, i had gone to see a play at Dionysus’ theatre as i do regularly as a devotional act for Dionysus. it was a play i’d seen many times before. and every time the same actor played the main character. that night however, chrys had taken his place. i was entranced by him and his talent and the way he performed on stage. i had grown a crush in those first 5 minutes he was on stage that continued until the end of the show. i ended up looking in the plays program to find the slip of paper that explained the veteran actors replacement and what his replacements name was.

< chrys > he had looked me up on social media too.

< theo > no stop! that sounds creepy *covers his face with hands*

< chrys > *chuckles* and i later found out he was the reason i was included in the theatre troupes invite to his family’s party that night.

< theo > me staring at him for two hours straight was me just trying to work up the courage to talk to him.

< interviewer > from the stories the public has heard about you, some would say that’s very unlike you.

< theo > it is! he just made me very nervous. because this time i cared if i fucked it up… shoot! can i swear?

< interviewer > *nods* yes you can theo

< theo > oh okay good! he was one i couldn’t risk fucking shit up with in any way. and it felt like i did! i was terrified! i just ran away convinced i ruined everything!

< interviewer > so how did that first meeting turn into where you are now? or another way to put it, how did you find out you didn’t ruin everything, theo?

< theo > after about 15 minutes of me panicking and anxiously rambling to my best friend, i had felt a tap on my shoulder. when i turned around it was chrys. he wanted to know if we could continue talking somewhere. i looked to my friend and she just motioned for me to go. i told him yes, and he asked if there was somewhere more quiet so i took him to the balcony, which is usually locked during our parties.

< interviewer > chrys, were there any plans going into asking theo if there was somewhere more quiet? sounds very risqué.

< chrys > oh my god, no! it was just really loud and i think i was starting to hear moaning, and i’d never been to a party like that before, so it was more of just a chance to escape.

< interviewer > theo did you think he was trying to get you into bed with him?

< theo > honestly i don’t know what i was thinking other than panicking, trying to focus on my breathing and be as calm as possible. but i believed him when he told me he had no plans to try and seduce me.

< interviewer > so what did you guys talk about on that balcony?

< chrys > i asked him about himself, he asked me about myself. we talked about our family and our childhood. we talked for what felt like hours, but the party still had not died down. half way through someone brought us wine, i barely noticed, didn’t ask. but we both drank away. he asked me about my dreams, offered to talk to people and pull some strings to get me a better leg up but i refused. told him why-

< theo > and i fell for him ever harder because of it.

< chrys > *chuckles* yes, he tells me all the time how much he adores my ambition, and my need to succeed on my own.

< interviewer > and how did the night end for you two?

< chrys > it barely did if we’re being honest.

< theo > *awkwardly laughs* well as you can expect after numerous glasses of wine, and mutual interest, flirting began between us. nothing raunchy more so just…

< chrys > romantic. i would say at least!

< theo > yes very romantic. we would compliment each others appearance in soft ways, compliment each others personality even… then he escalated the flirting to more than just romantic, and next thing i knew i was grabbing his hand and leading him around the corner of our wrap around patio, down the stairs that led to the second floor wrap around patio, and brought him straight into my room.

< interviewer > so you two slept together that night?

< chrys > yes… to be fair though, he did tell me we didn’t have to, that we could just talk in his room. though, fun fact, when i asked if he took all his hook-ups to his room this way, i also found out that his hook-ups think they’ve seen his room, but in reality only see a guest room on the fourth floor.

< interviewer > oh wow! so chrys was important to you, huh theo?

< theo > very much so! he spent the night, ate breakfast (or more so brunch) with my family, and stayed a little into the day until i finally let him leave muahaha !! though i was scared he wouldn’t want to see me again. i brought up seeing him again at breakfast, and he told me, “i was hoping i meant more to you than just one night given that i’m sat in your sleepwear eating omelettes with you at 12pm.”

< interviewer > so i assume you two saw each other again due to our current setting *laughs*

< chrys > *laughs* yes, we saw each other again.

< interviewer > how did you two view your relationship prior to the red carpet event where you, theo, took chrys as your date?

< theo > from the beginning i viewed him as so much more than what any of my past encounters have been. the goal was never just sex with him. i just wanted him in my life, no matter if it was just friends or if it was more. when things evolved, i don’t think there was a label that could be assigned to it. but i basically viewed him as my almost boyfriend, i mean if he asked me to be his boyfriend any time after we woke up the night after, i would have said yes… which some say would’ve been dumb. *laughs*

< interviewer > and you chrys?

< chrys > at the beginning, i was worried i was just one of his conquests. i knew his hook-ups were never just one night for him, and i thought that was my fate. i viewed it this way until, not long after, he asked me to hang out. not have sex, but hang out. then i thought… maybe he wants friends with benefits? which then got quieted down as theo began singing my praises in the most romantic ways, as well as when i began noticing how he looked at me in the most heart wrenching ways. and these actions were consistent, he told me he was seeing no one else, and that he didn’t plan on it either. it was just me. and soon i saw it the same way he did… we were almost boyfriends! until he asked me out the same day he asked me to be his date to the event.

< interviewer > so what was the timeline of you two first meeting and then becoming boyfriends?

< chrys > i would say… theo saw me preform. a week later we met. three to four weeks later he asked me out.

< interviewer > that’s so short! i can’t imagine how sure you two have to be with that timeline! it’s very cute. are you worried about what people may say when they see that timeline?

< theo > personally i am not because i’ve lived through this kind of attention and constant scrutiny from the public my whole life. but i understand chrys has not had that kind of attention and i know he’s worried. which makes me worried for him. i wish i could make that shit not affect him, but that’s not how it works, so i’ll be there for him when it does.

< chrys > there’s so much i know i have to be ready for, and i know it’ll suck. but it’s worth it to be with theo, truly. as long as we’re happy, i don’t care.

< interviewer > that’s very sweet, i wish the best for both of you! thank you so much for speaking with me!

< theo > thank you so much, it was a pleasure.

< chrys > yes, thank you.

genuinely thank you if you read all or any of this !! i’m also genuinely so proud of this even if it’s a bit ass. so thank you if you gave it even a little of attention 💕🫶

[heylittleriotact]

I've never heard this banter and I'm going to go the fuck off.

Firstly: Everything @emmg said. The whole "I want to become a lich" arc is actually incredibly contentious for my death-positive, mortality embracing Rook. Like to the point where she basically tells him at one point: "I really like you, and I really like us, and it's important to me that you're happy, so I won't try to change your mind or interfere with your plans, but I think it's only right to be transparent now about the fact that I can't see a future for us should you successfully pursue lichdom." She's very up-front about it, because she isn't at all comfortable with the radical change of the entire power dynamic of their relationship: they would no longer be equals, and she's not interested in ultimately becoming one more rag that he's dragging behind him (to quote the absolutely beautiful song by Josh Ritter called 'The Curse' which is about an Egyptologist who discovers a mummy who comes back to life and they fall in love but since he is undead and she is mortal, it ends tragically and it reminds me SO MUCH OF a Emm!Lich/Rook romance, or honestly any future romances he might find himself in as a Lich.) Here - listen to it: go. Right now. Cute af music video too:

Secondly: BULLSHIT, EMMRICH. That's such absolute fucking bullshit. "There's always something to discover in the world" and "I think I should never grow tired of that" are both such insanely pompous, self-aggrandizing statements that he flings out there in an effort to frame himself in the light he wants to be perceived in: the Quintessential Academic - forever curious and eternally learning: an inspiration to curious and inquisitive minds everywhere to be celebrated and lauded for his immeasurable services to society.

The truth is, he knows it's bullshit, and is painfully aware that lichdom - even without a partner or someone like Rook is bound to be soul-crushingly lonely. Dude is lonely af and he's still got a fucking PULSE. But he's made it this far in life shouldering the burden of feeling like he'll never find someone. Loneliness isn't new to him, and it's really easy to suggest that after a few thousand years of existence under one's belt that picking up new friends will be as easy as popping down to the pub and saying "hi" to a stranger. Pffft! Trifles!

Emmrich is smarter than that. He knows better than that, but he's trying to convince himself just as much as he's trying to convince Lucanis that having to embrace the fleeting, transitory nature of relationships as he watches the ebb and flow of life and death cycle repeatedly before his eyes is not only what he wants, but it's what will make him happy and it's such a brazen contradiction of himself that if my Rook overheard this she would be unable to keep herself from snorting and going, "... really?"

This man is trying to put himself above love and friendships and relationships in a way that makes them seem like specimens to be studied and written about, when we know that he's probably written no less than a dozen poems about how Rook's hair looks in the sunlight, and is annoying the shit out of Vorgoth and Myrna because all of his letters home since he and Rook got together are less about their progress against the gods, and more about how absolutely wonderful Rook is and how pleased he is that he decided to accompany her on this journey blah blah blah...

He's collected a little family with the Veilguard, and he makes no secret of how much he cares for all of them.

Delusional, pookie: you're fucking delusional.

Lucanis and Emmrich about immortality

[woozinhos]

hi!!! congrats on 400<3. may i request a make up sex with mingi from ateez with the 12th quote, pls?

merry Christmas anon I decided to choose yours to write for Christmas I hope you enjoy this make up sex with mingi <333

The argument had been intense, the tension between you and Mingi reaching a boiling point.

You'd both said things you didn't mean, the words cutting deep and leaving wounds that felt like they might never heal. But now, as you stand there facing each other, the anger has faded and all that's left is an aching need to be close to one another. Mingi's eyes lock onto yours, his gaze intense as he takes a step closer to you.

"I'm sorry," he says, his voice rough with emotion. "I didn't mean what I said. I was angry and hurt and I lashed out at you."

You feel a lump forming in your throat, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes as you hear the sincerity in his words.

"I'm sorry too," you whisper, your voice trembling slightly. "I said some awful things as well. I didn't mean them, Mingi. I was just so frustrated."

Mingi takes another step closer, closing the distance between you until there's only a few inches separating your bodies. He reaches out, his hand gently cupping your cheek as he looks down at you with a mixture of regret and desire.

"I know," he murmurs, his thumb brushing over your cheekbone. "I know you didn't mean it. But I can't stop thinking about what you said. The way you looked at me, the words that came out of your mouth... they've been haunting me all day."

He takes a deep breath, his eyes burning with a desperate need.

"I need to hear you say something else," he says, his voice dropping to a low growl. "I need to hear you scream my name when you cum."

Your heart skips a beat at his words, the desire in his voice sending a shiver down your spine. Mingi's eyes darken with hunger, his hand sliding from your cheek to grip your chin, forcing you to look up at him.

"I want to make you forget everything but my name," he whispers, his breath hot against your ear. "I want to erase every other thought from your mind until all that's left is me."

Mingi's grip on your chin tightens, his fingers digging into your skin as he pulls you closer. His body presses against yours, his muscular frame pinning you against the wall behind you. He captures your lips in a searing kiss, his tongue immediately plunging into your mouth as he claims you as his own.

The kiss is fierce and passionate, full of all the pent-up emotions and desire that have been building between you for hours. Mingi's hands roam over your body, his touch possessive and hungry as he claims every inch of you. He breaks the kiss, his lips trailing down your jawline and along your neck, leaving a trail of searing kisses in their wake.

He nips at your skin, leaving behind marks that are sure to linger for days, marking you as his. Mingi's anger and frustration from the argument come out in the way he touches you, his movements rough and desperate. He bites down hard on your collarbone, making you gasp in a mixture of pain and pleasure.

"You're mine," he growls against your skin, his hands gripping your hips tightly as he grinds against you. "And I'm going to make sure you never forget that again."

Mingi's mouth continues to explore your body, his lips and teeth marking you in all the places he knows are most sensitive. He reaches for the hem of your shirt, yanking it up and over your head in one swift motion. He takes a step back, his eyes raking over your exposed skin as he takes in the sight of you.

"So beautiful," he murmurs, his gaze darkening with desire. "And all mine."

Mingi lifts you up with ease, his strong arms wrapping around your body as he carries you towards the bedroom. He lays you down on the bed, his body hovering over yours as he gazes down at you with a possessive glint in his eyes.

"You're so perfect like this," he murmurs, his hands trailing up your thighs and under your skirt. "Spread out beneath me, waiting for me to take what's mine."

Mingi looks down at you, his eyes burning with a primal need.

"Can we skip the foreplay?" he asks, his voice rough with desire. "I need you, now. I need to feel you around me, I need to be inside you."

Mingi lets out a low growl at your nod, his eyes darkening with satisfaction.

"Good girl," he murmurs, his hands immediately going to the waistband of your skirt.

He pulls it off in one swift motion, leaving you completely bare beneath him. Mingi's eyes rake over your body, his gaze devouring every inch of your skin.

"So beautiful," he repeats, his voice thick with desire. "So perfect for me."

He runs his hands up your thighs, his fingers tracing the outline of your hips before moving to grip your waist.

"I'm going to make you scream," he promises, his thumbs digging into your skin. "I'm going to make you beg for more."

Mingi quickly sheds his own clothes, his body exposed to your hungry gaze.

He stands at the edge of the bed, towering over you with an air of dominance and control. His muscles ripple as he moves, the sight of him completely naked and aroused making your heart race with anticipation. Mingi looks down at you, his eyes locking onto yours as he asks the question.

"Can we skip the condom this time?" he asks, his voice low and serious. "I want to feel all of you, I want to fill you up and claim you in every way possible."

Mingi grins at your nod, a mix of relief and excitement crossing his face.

"Good," he murmurs, his hands roaming over your body once more. "I've been dreaming of this for so long."

He moves onto the bed, positioning himself between your legs as he gazes down at you with a predatory glint in his eyes. Mingi enters you in one smooth thrust, his body slotting perfectly against yours as he fills you completely. He lets out a low groan, his eyes rolling back in pleasure as he savors the feeling of being inside you without a barrier.

"God, you feel amazing," he breathes, his hands gripping your hips tightly as he holds himself still for a moment.

Mingi takes a deep breath, trying to steady himself as he adjusts to the sensation of being inside you.

"So tight," he murmurs, his voice strained with desire. "You're so tight and hot around me, it's driving me crazy."

He slowly pulls out, before thrusting back in again, burying himself deep inside you with a guttural moan.

Mingi sets a punishing pace, his hips snapping against yours as he begins to move with increasing intensity. He pounds into you relentlessly, each thrust hard and deep, hitting all the right spots and making you see stars. His hands roam over your body, gripping and squeezing your flesh as he claims you as his own. Mingi grabs your hips, flipping you over onto your hands and knees with a growl.

He positions himself behind you, his chest pressing against your back as he covers your body with his own. He grips your hair, tugging your head back and exposing your neck to him as he continues to pound into you from behind. Mingi's anger from the argument comes out in every snap of his hips, his body driving into you with a brutal intensity that makes you cry out.

He grips your hips tightly, pulling you back against him with each thrust as he buries himself deep inside you over and over again. His teeth graze the sensitive skin of your neck, nipping and biting at your flesh as he marks you as his in every way possible. Mingi's breath is hot against your ear as he speaks, his voice low and rough with desire.

"You're mine," he growls, his hips slamming against yours with each word. "You're mine, and I'm never letting you go."

He lets go of your hair, his hand trailing down your body to find your clit.

He begins to rub it in time with his thrusts, his fingers expertly working your sensitive flesh as he pushes you closer and closer to the edge. The added stimulation of his fingers on your clit makes you moan loudly, your body arching back against his as pleasure courses through you. Mingi grins against your skin, his teeth grazing the sensitive spot just below your ear.

"That's it," he murmurs, his voice filled with satisfaction. "Let me hear you. Let everyone hear how good I'm making you feel."

You gasp out his name, the word a breathless moan on your lips.

"Mingi... please..." you whimper, your body trembling beneath his touch as you feel yourself nearing the edge.

Mingi's grin widens at the sound of his name on your lips, his pace becoming even more frantic as he drives you closer and closer to your release.

"Please what, baby?" he teases, his fingers continuing to work your clit with a relentless rhythm. "Tell me what you want."

"Come for me," he growls, his own climax drawing near as he feels your body tightening around him.

He quickens his pace even further, his hips snapping against yours with a desperate urgency as he chases both of your releases. With a few more thrusts, Mingi finally sends you over the edge, your body convulsing beneath him as your orgasm crashes over you. He lets out a guttural moan as he feels you clenching around him, his own release following closely behind as he spills himself deep inside you.

He collapses on top of you, his chest heaving as he tries to catch his breath, his arms wrapped tightly around you as he holds you close. Mingi nuzzles his face into the crook of your neck, his breathing slowly returning to normal as he comes down from his high. He presses soft kisses to your skin, his voice filled with a mix of exhaustion and tenderness as he speaks.

"Promise me," he murmurs, his arms tightening around you. "Promise me we'll never fight like that again."

[serge-starr]

If you hate Donald Trump and Elon Musk like I do, I need your advice, please read this

Red text - Why I hate them

Blue text - My problem

Green text - Why it's a problem/why I need advice

Genuinely, do I even really have to explain why I hate Trump? Is it not ovious enough? He is one of the most evil people ever known and there is NO SUCH THING as a "good trump supporter". THEY'RE ALL BAD. He is openly a misogynist and talks about women so poorly. He talks about them like they're s-x objects and says that women deserve punishment if they get abortions. He's been accused of SA by DOZENS, literally DOZENS of women. He even sexualises his own daughter and says that he would date her if they weren't related. Furthermore, he's cheated on all of his wives.

And what else? He is racist. Straight up, he is literally just racist. He also openly admires dictators and said that he wants to become one himself. He said that he wants an army just like (Germany mustache guy)'s. He has a friend called Nicholas Fuentes who also has openly said that he admires (Germany mustache guy), is a Holocaust denier and said, I quote, "your body, my choice" and "there will never be a female president". Trump has unfair tax policies that only benefit rich people and fuck over the middle and lower class. I struggle to explain this and why it upsets me to my parents because my parents don't care about politics or understand me as a person. Even if they did they wouldn't have the same views as me. They're conservative and I'm alternative.

So my problem is that my Mother says that all politicians are narcissists. I tried to reason with her and explain that politicians might just be people who stand for something and want to make change. She said that all politicians are power hungry and all they want is money and fame. I told her that I was passionate about politics and I cared about it a lot. She said that I shouldn't care about politics. I tested her standards and told her "what if I want to work in politics? Does that make ME a narcissist? Or does it not apply to me because I'm your child?" My Mum said that I would never make it as a politician because I'm too soft.

My Dad on the other hand, has bought a tesla, for multiple reasons. Firstly because they're good for the environment, and also because he liked the car's design/functions and he liked that he didn't have to pay for gas. I have begged my parents multiple times to not take me anywhere in that car (we have other cars). My Dad asked me to explain why and I told him that it went against my beliefs to go in the car. The company of tesla is partially owned by Elon Musk who is the richest man in the world and oh my God he is an ASSHOLE. He has so much fucking money that he doesn't even need and once he literally prevented money from being donated to a charity for children's cancer. He is the definition of a priviledged asshole. And of course he's a fucking Trump supporter. My parents believe that I'm being unreasonable but I don't think they understand how much it truly upsets me. At this point, it's not even political opinions, it's a political fact. I don't support Donald or Elon, I never have, and I never will. It is not justifiable to support them.

I need your advice because my Mum has continuously forced me to get in that car and take me places with it, like school, my art club, to town or literally just anywhere. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of people seeing me get out of it at school. It's embarassing. My parents don't understand. My Dad said that if I don't want to get in the tesla then I can just stop going to art club and other places. He asked me to explain why I hated the tesla and I told him it was difficult to explain.

What if people at my school think I'm a trump supporter? Look, I'm always one who doesn't care what other people think, but that's only if I'M BEING AUTHENTIC AND MY TRUE SELF. That tesla is not me, it's not my thing and it never will be. I hate going in that car. I hate its size, I hate its design, I hate its company, I hate everything about it. I'm sick of worrying that my friends and classmates think I'm a priviledged asshole. I wish my parents had a sense of reality and would just understand this.

Please, if you have any kind of solution, tell me. And don't say something like "Oh just try explaining to your parents how you feel and why you're uncomfortbale". DUDE I'VE TRIED THAT 9892423 TIMESSS. THEY WON'T LISTEN. THEY DON'T GET IT.

Who can I call? Who can I reach out to? Who can I ask for help? WTF DO I DO???!?!

That's all! Thanks for reading

[rei-ismyname]

Merry X-Men Holiday Special Highlights

Happy holidays, everyone! It's been about a year since I started posting about the X-Men on Tumblr and if it wasn't for all the lovely folks who engage and discuss it wouldn't be so enriching. I'm super anti-capitalist and anti cultural Christianity so it's less 'Happy Christmas' and more 'I wish y'all the best.' ❤️💚

I wonder if Lockheed speaks Hebrew

Here's Kitty Pryde celebrating Chanukah in Genosha and remembering her father. Leading the special with an explicitly Jewish character observing a Jewish holiday is great, but the notion of saving the world by becoming president of the USA is a dubious one. The USA is an imperialist entity built on deep seated systemic inequality and worse. Even the most progressive of presidents is beholden to that. It doesn't mean we shouldn't try, but Kitty is kidding herself about 'saving the world the right way.'

Nature Girl hates Christmas, and it's hard to argue with her reasons. The parts about warmth are weird to me because I live in Australia where Christmas is always hot AF. One of the few days I hope for rain, tbh.

I'm not sure if Bobby quite understood what 'eschewing capitalism' means but this looks pretty fun. That tie dye X-Men tee slaps and I want one. I wonder what Kubark thinks of this human holiday.

This story with Magneto coming around on the pointlessness of lighting menorahs does the rounds every now and then, though not as much as I'd expect. The kids are particularly plucky and eloquent, and the one who emphatically tells Magneto he's wrong is a legend. I'm fond of any story where Magneto rethinks his beliefs, and this is a nice one.

It took me a while to notice that this is written by Charlamagne tha God, possibly because it's kinda funny to imagine Ororo knowing who that is. Idk why, I've just never seen any stories indicating that she's into Hip Hop culture. I like that it's a rejection of turning the other cheek where bigoted assholes are concerned. You can't reach some people, and there's no obligation to exhaust yourself trying. Fuck em. The Michelle Obama mention is a bit on the nose.

Old man Logan is cutting firewood and being gruff, as he does. Kurt gives him a picture of himself, which is a baller move. I was under the impression that this Logan was an alternate reality Logan, and doesn't have a particularly close relationship with these X-Men. Nothing about Logans makes sense, sometimes you just have to accept it as cute and cool.

Glob does stuff! Is that meant to be mistletoe? We don't have it down here. He nails up some plant matter and then chills by himself. Little bit depressing, but I can't talk.

Bobby Drake has a party! Interestingly neither Jewish nor Christian, but a pagan holiday that's become a bit more popular (like Christmas and Easter.) Hope is watching Cable do... something, in a recorded message from when she was the universe's most unpopular baby.

Some kids are sharing the rumour that Magneto merked Santa, which is hilarious. It's obviously untrue, not least because Santa is Mags' mutant brother. Kurt lectures them.

Jubilee beats up Arcade (yay!) and quotes Home Alone, rescuing Shogo (who's spending this Christmas as a dragon in Otherworld.) I really don't like Arcade, though he has done two excellent things. Torturing Sinister and creating the Proletarian - worker's hero of the Soviet Union.

Nightcrawler and Storm show up and Christmas is really just a backdrop for a light anti-capitalist tale. Cool! I'd expect Cyclops to be in this book, but no. It's Chuck-less as well.

[fynnlink]

First of all: Thanks and Merry Christmas / Happy Holidays to you too.

My first response was to your framing it as not having any answers to the points you brought not that said answers maybe weren't satisfying or "enough".

And I in no way mean to argue against your "being pissed off" since it's a valid opinion especially if you like Aaravos a lot. So if I in turn offended you I apologise; I merely mean to discuss and engage with the media.

Now on to the important stuff:

I agree wholeheartedly with the point regarding "external" material (outside of the main series) but I think one of the issues TDP suffers from most is too much lore/story having to be squeezed into short, 9 episode seasons which is a shame as the world building is my favourite part of the series. Thus the need to use other ways to communicate parts of the story or lore. (The image of Ziard for example and the monologue/story attached to it are freely accessible but the point stands)

Having certain expectations even "high" ones is of course more than justified and feeling upset/unsatisfied when those expectations aren't met is too. There are quite a few plotlines which have developed in a specific way or not developed at all, that have disappointed me after waiting for answers since 2018. (Damn I've started this series at 14. That hiatus, seriously, never again please)

When exactly did Zubeia say that? Or are you referring to her lines in S4 E4? Because I wouldn't call the results of Aaravos' actions/involvement before his imprisonment Revolutions but rather Civil Wars / Unrest and I think her line "A Startouch Elf, one of the Great Ones, respected and loved by all until we discovered long-hidden treachery." is more of general statement than referring to her and the Archdragons. And the crime he was punished for was being responsible for Queen Aditi's disappearance (though no one knew what exactly happened to her until Aaravos told Khessa and then Janai found out) thus causing the tensions between the Elves and Dragons to boil over and also depriving the Archdragons from ending their succession conflict peacefully. (I'm hoping that if we get Act 3 we finally actually learn about the Orphan Queen.)

As to the severity of Aaravos' punishment it is quite literally the only punishment pissible as murdering him would've just had him return at a later point and imprisoning him in any other way would be nigh important due to his immense power both in terms of magical ability and persuasiveness manipulation.

I wholehearted agree that the involvement of both the Orphan Queen and the Jailer is less than adequately explained. Like you said it makes little sense to 1) believe a random human who at the time was probably young too and 2) to entrust the entire imprisonment process to another human one who was supposedly very mysterious. It would also be interesting to know whether or not the Jailer used Dark Magic or just other means like a primal stone or inanimate objects like gemstomes.

I don't think Aaravos had enough power (as in political influence not magic) to do anything against Sol Regem overtly. As even back then Anak Arao was THE dragon prince (Aaravos calls him that in S6 E9) so one of his parents was mostly likely the current regent during Leola's childhood 2000+ years ago. And back then Aaravos seemed to live a humble(r) life away from the heavens on earth with Leola and had no sway on the council. (Though it is interesting that The Merciful One apparently cared enough about Aaravos to comfort him above the Sea of the Castout). The entire story isn't resolved but Aaravos playing the long game was him drawing it out. He, at least in part, is responsible for humans learning dark magic and thus for Ziard "blinding" Sol Regem, Aaravos was also probably involved in whatever caused Sol Regem to get angry enough to indirectly kill Aithne Solaire as Aaravos even knew about it. This to me at least is reminiscent of Aaravos' incredible quote about surviving such a terrible wound (losing a loved one) and thus suffering forever. Aaravos didn't directly attack or kill Sol Regem to prolong the Archdragon's suffering and since he knew how to easily manipulate and use Sol Regem to further his own plans. Never throw away something that could one day prove useful. It took barely any work to get Karim to do exactly what Aaravos wanted and then to use Pharos to direct Sol Regem against Katolis, Viren and Aaravos' imprisonment. (A bonus benefit which in my opinion Aaravos also planned for is that this further turned Claudia on this "dark path" when she was just beginning to question/regret it)

Personally I don't think Aaravos' line was supposed to single out Zubeia from the other Archdragons as the only/main one to BETRAY Aaravos. Both the Archdragons and Aaravos call what happened back then a betrayal (Rex Igneous' line about "Not long enough, Betrayer") the Archdragons for Aaravos' manipulations and Aaravos for the imprisonment. It's simply that she's the only one who was involved when he says it and he's addressing her and not the others in the beginning of his conversations via posessed Callum. And Zubeia has proven she's ready and willing to fight when necessary (the standoff with Rex Igneous, her fighting against the corrupted Banthers in the great bookery and her attacking Aaravos in the finale)

When does he differentiate between Zubeia and the other Archdragons, he has the lines about Zubeia being "ravishing" but back when he tells Viren about Avizandum imprisoning him him only mentioning Avizandum is, in my opinion, just the series trying to keep it simple and even in a watsonian sense Viren proved just moments prior that the names of the Archdragons aren't known to him. And he does seem to enjoy her suffering by making her face Avizandum in the finale.

Regarding the Staff of Ziard that's why I amended that Aaravos had taken the Staff not necessarily that he had stolen it.

I think the Starscraper might function as the Star Nexus and thus draws in a semi-religious following and it's made up of other Elves since the Startouch Elves "don't intervene" which is probably what inspired that part of the Celestial Elves' culture. As to why it's Skywing Elves, earlier it was said that only winged Skywing Elves live there before they changed it. Again in lore this change probably happened because some elves at the Starscraper were born without wings. But yes it is something they could expand upon hopefully if Astrid sticks around the Dragang.

There was at least one more Startouch Elf around during the division of Xadia and expulsion of the humans to the east. (Visible in the opening of S1 E1 next to what is either Queen Aditi or her daughter. And they look distinctively different from Aaravos)

100% agree. Elarion has fascinated me since the poem was first translated and has only grown more and more interesting since. It's probably too big/important and needs to be the main focus. I think Claudia's final scene might be near Elarion since it's the same place as the S4-S7 intro sequence and the mountain range and sky full of stars and nebulae looks like the one from the scene of Aaravos crying over (creating it) the Sea of the Castout.

I don't view it as the finale of the series just of the act and season. Both the way it ended and the fandom's reaction is exactly the same as when Miraculous' fifth season ended. If you view it as a Series Finale not a Season Finale then yes it leaves certain storylines and plotpoints unresolved but whether they continue the story via more seasons or novels, etc the story isn't over.

Which is not to say you're not allowed to disagree. Art and Stories and their interpretation are up to any who behold them. It's just a matter of viewing it as an end for now rather then a complete end. And since Act 3 has been planned for a while I don't judge the story without also factoring in the limitations placed upon it by Netflix at first only paying for the first three and then the next four seasons. Of course a story made for ten seasons limited to seven can't resolve all plotlines. It was always meant to have an open end to entice viewers to want the final instalment.

Ultimately I hope/want Act 3 to focus on explaining the history more in depth especially from 2000 years ago at the founding of Elarion to 300 years ago with Avizandum's reign, a more in depth look at the Startouch Elves and the Star Arcanum and 'everything' related to it (for example Stella having the Star Arcanum??) and most importantly, to me, the origin of Dark Magic and further explaining it's specifics.

All three could be tied to Elarion as the main geological focus (along with Evrkynd probably, which could even draw parallels with the first human city built in opposition/definace to "Xadia" and the latest built in cooperation and peace. Once again I'm also glad Sol Regem is just bones now because that prick deserved what he got.) as all paths converge either in Elarion or at the Sea of the Castout.

- - - - -

Unrelated Sidenote but I think Aaravos will ultimately be "defeated" by, like most other parents in the series, sacrificing himself to restore/resurrect Leola. 1) He wanted to sacrifice his life for her in the beginning but wasn't allowed/able to do so and 2) it would even be akin to a final victory for him in undoing the Cosmic Orders' plans. And it would once again call back to the series' message of Love triumphing over Hate and Vengeance and the theme of Parents giving their future for their children. And this isn't as unlikely anymore since the series has begun to make certain deaths less permanent i. e. Harrow = Pip

Narrative of Love not Strength as Aaravos can't be defeated by force alone but by appealing to his love for his daughter(s).

Depending on when this happens and whether or not the Cosmic Order feels threatened or disrespected by it it could even put the Dragang (who would probably not turn against Leola) and the C.O. at odds and lead to a resolution in which there's justice for the C.O.'s wrongful deed(s) and not Revenge the way Aaravos dies it right now.

Also it would be similar to Elves and Humans working together to return Zym and bring peace and would be poetic to now also "repay" Leola's kindness and her friendship to both peoples in the past.

wait a fucking minute...

We still don't know why and how Aaravos was imprisoned.

And what exactly his beef with Sol Reg and the other archdragons was about.

And what his relationship was with the Orphan Queen.

Oh yeah! And also his relationship with Ziard... and city of Elarion...

DID THEY JUST KILL HIM WITH ABSOLUTELY NO EXPLANATION?

I'M SO PISSED OFF

[yaoireview]

Glinda and elphaba

...excuse me?

Glinda and- elpha... what are you SAYING RIGHT NOW?

...Those are WOMEN.... NOT MEN.... i'm god damn YAOI REVIEW..... NOT YURI REVIEW... oh my GOD..

This isn't funny! You've got a SICK sense of humor!

I think some people need a lesson on Yaoi right now.

(boys kissing. dont like, dont read)

WHAT IS YAOI?

its boys kissing.

just boys kissing.

And I don't mean it metaphorically or rhetorically or poetically or theoretically or any other fancy way. Its boys kissing. Straight. Up.

please let it be known that yaoi in some forms is innapropiate artwork of boys.. i dont see it that way.. its just boys kissing. keep your sick selves out of this.

you may not know this, but glinda and elphaba are NOT boys. check again, they're girls. (unless im wrong, in which COMMENT DOWN BELOW and tell ME what your favorite boys kissing is.)

You wicked fans... i cant even CALL you wicked.. you're STRAIGHT UP DEMENTED.. You people make me sick.

Look.. I'll do it but if you're not satisfied with what you find, just go over to Yuri Review's house since you LOVE them so much

GELPHIE, THE EVIDENCE AND REVIEW

I think this is gonna be pretty easy to prove the existence of, so im just gonna do this QUICK and simple.

What is This Feeling? Beginning Lyrics

This is definitely one of the smaller pieces of evidence but the lyrics at the beginning REALLY make it seem like they were gonna say they are in love.

You might just say "oh its just a joke its a joke of the song!! musicals LOVE jokes!!" but your pal in high school "jokingly" hit on a man, and now they're married? Still think its a bit?? ....yeah... me neither..

They literally kiss in the first novel

look man.. you're gonna have to take my word for this one.. because im not opening that book.. I've heard of the things that happens in the books and I'm not taking any chances. An article about it said this.. it may be false.. it may not be its kinda a guessing game with that sorta stuff

i may have also just grabbed the wrong quote though because they said it was heterosexual but I'm SURE it'll be fine

Ariana Grande's Comments

Ariana Grande HAS claimed that she thinks that her character is 'a little in the closet'.

You can trust Ariana Grande. She would never do anything bad

Ariana Grande is CLEARLY the most important person to speak out about the canonical ideas of yuri in this story

CONCLUSION

look... you must understand that i REALLY didn't enjoy this. I like wicked just fine i watched it opening weekend its just... not what i review... I review BOYS kissing.. not girls kissing..

Yaoi: 0/10

Yuri: 8.5/10 (or something like that as i said this isnt my profession, im kinda like a substitute teacher that just turned on a video)

[inawickedlittletown]

All I Want For Christmas Is You (BuckTommy) - 6/8

Summary: When Buck and Tommy pick each other for the 118's Secret Santa, they both realize they know nothing about each other. That changes very quickly. Words: 3.1k Rating: M Read on Ao3 Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five

-

Chapter Six

The next week was different. Buck wasn’t sure if anyone even noticed, because Tommy had just reverted back to just kind of ignoring Buck unless it was work related. They were never alone despite Buck trying to catch him on his own. When Buck had tried sending him a text it sat unread for days and then when Tommy did respond it was just to decline Buck asking if he’d want to go see a movie together. 

Buck knew when he wasn’t wanted. He knew when it was better to just cut his losses and move on. It happened to him often enough. There was just something about him that made people think they could do better, or that he just wasn’t worth all the trouble after a romp in the sheets. Tommy had come to that conclusion and Buck couldn’t fault him. So, he stayed away. There were more fishes in the sea and all that. 

At the very least, the time they’d spent together had given Buck a few options when it came to Secret Santa. Although, a part of him — a petty part — wanted to just go out of his way to make the present as mundane and useless as anything. 

He couldn’t quite convince himself to go that route. But, it wasn’t like Buck knew what he would get him. The one thing he was certain of was that once Christmas had come and gone that would be the end of it and he would stop letting his mind drift to thinking about Tommy yet again. Buck would go out and find someone else and just move on. It was what he did and it was what he was good at. 

When the week was over, Buck gave in to the impulse to just go out to a bar and see if he could do something to get Tommy out of his mind. He was barely there a few minutes before he left and wound up at the mall instead. 

Buck had a little over a week left and at least being as alone as he was did mean that Buck really only had to worry about getting something for Tommy. The worst of it was walking into a store and pinpointing things that would have worked perfectly to give to Chim or Hen or Bobby. Not so much for Tommy. 

Eventually, Buck wound up just going into a cafe to pick up some coffee and a snack. It reminded him of Tommy’s excitement for the cookies the other day. He had a feeling he was going to wind up just getting one of those chocolate gift sets as impersonal as it felt. At least Tommy would like that for sure which was something.

When he pushed the door to the cafe open on his way out, he almost ran right into Karen. 

“Oh. Karen, sorry.” 

“It’s okay,” she said with a smile. “Fancy seeing you out and about.” 

“Secret Santa,” Buck said. “I still haven’t even figured out what to get so I’ve been browsing the mall.” 

Karen chuckled. “That’s right. Hen already has hers ready to go. Actually, I’m pretty sure she finished all her shopping. Clearly, I’m not done. I was thinking of going into the bookstore to see if I could find something for Hen. Want to join me?” 

“Yeah. Sure. Maybe something will pop out for me there,” Buck said. 

He ate the muffin he’d picked up at the cafe on the way, but was still holding his coffee when they arrived at the bookstore. 

The whole place had been decorated for the holidays. The window had a display with a small ceramic village complete with a tree and a train that went around the whole thing on a track. Lights and garland covered the shelves and on the door was a wreath made out of tiny felt books. 

At first he and Karen perused together. The store was not just books. They had a stationary area and a shelf full of travel mugs with quotes that probably came from books and next to that a rack that held tote bags. 

The shelves were arranged with signs and Buck wound up heading in the direction of the nonfiction. His first thought was to see if there was anything on art. Or, flying. He pulled out his phone to look at the picture he’d taken of Tommy’s bookshelf. No books on art, but a lot about flying. On closer inspection it looked like they were flight manuals rather than books on planes or helicopters. 

The bookstore did have a few books on different famous artists. DaVinci. Van Gogh. Picasso. Monet. Khalo. Buck couldn’t have been able to say much about any of them and he didn’t think that Tommy would actually have any use for biographies. So, Buck wandered the shelves. A LGBTQ+ section caught his eye. 

Buck had always considered himself an ally. He’d gone to LA Pride the year before. He never had a problem with anyone that identified differently be it their gender or sexual preferences, he just had never looked at himself and thought he could be more than the default. 

On the LGBTQ+ shelf there were plenty of novels, but some non-fiction as well. Self-help and essays and history. 

“Hey,” Karen said suddenly at his elbow. “Find anything?” 

“Oh. No. I don’t think a book is the right way to go.”

“But these caught your eye?” Karen asked. “Wait, did you get Hen as your Secret Santa? No, don’t tell me. I can’t know.” 

“I don’t have Hen,” Buck said. “I just—”

Buck had told Connor. Tommy knew, obviously. He hadn’t told anyone else. Karen though...she seemed like a safe bet to tell and yeah it might make it back to Hen, but Buck didn’t even really care about that. It might mean he didn’t have to say anything to Hen outright. 

“I’m bi, Karen,” Buck said. “It’s…um, it’s new.” 

Karen’s smile didn’t falter. “Wow. Thank you for telling me.” 

Buck took a breath. “I kissed a guy and it was like…like I realized I hadn’t been whole my entire life until then. I’ve always been an ally and now it’s…I guess I’m more. I’m bi.” 

“You certainly are, Buck,” Karen said. “Does that mean you’re seeing someone, then?” 

Tommy flashed in his mind. After that date and the glorious afternoon spent in Tommy’s bed they hadn’t spoken outside of work and Buck knew it was over before anything had even begun. Buck felt dumb for thinking that it could be more and that Tommy might give them a chance. He should have known better. 

“No,” Buck said and then grabbed a book at random. 

The cover was pink and it was apparently a romance novel. He put it back. He could feel Karen watching him. 

“I kissed a guy and we had sex a few times and I never told him that he was the first guy I was with and he basically ghosted me after that,” Buck said. 

It was mostly the truth. 

“Oh, you jumped right on in, then. Hen’s told me stories, but most people don’t do things at your pace.”

Buck hummed. “I guess not. Anyway, it doesn’t matter. It’s over and I don’t think I’ll find anything in here for him.” 

Karen made a noise, but she started coughing. 

“I’ll pay for these,” she said.

Karen paid for the four books she’d picked up and Buck waited for her. 

“Hey, Buck, this does get easier and less confusing.” 

“I hope so.” 

-

He’d sketched Evan into the better half of a sketchbook. His hands. His face. A very rough one of his body while Tommy had been riding him. Other things too, Evan’s smile. His birthmark. Abstract things that were a reminder of Evan. He was clearly well rooted in Tommy in a way that would be hard to shake. Shake him, he would. 

The days following their date had been a little awkward. Tommy had even seen Chim and Hen sharing glances because Tommy had gone from talking to Evan a bit more and including him more to ignoring him again. 

“Did Buck do something to you?” Hen had asked one afternoon between calls. 

“No. He’s still the same impulsive kid.” 

“He’s definitely grown a bit,” Hen said. 

Tommy was glad when they had a call to get to. He wound up sitting next to Evan and was stiff the whole ride there. When they arrived on the scene Bobby paired them together he didn’t even blink. Evan had caught on by that point, at least, that Tommy wouldn’t talk to him. So, he didn’t try though his baleful glances struck Tommy to the heart. 

He and Evan went up the ladder that was extended out to the roof of the house, neither said a word and it felt like a blanket of tension had been laid atop them both. The man they were helping had injured his leg while putting lights on his roof. Even he seemed to sense the tension in the air as they helped to get him on a backboard to transport him down. 

Maybe it was unfair to freeze Evan out, but Tommy didn’t know what else to do. He couldn’t get attached to Evan. He couldn’t be what Evan needed and there were already too many complications that would arise most because they worked side by side. It was better this way. He did hate the kicked puppy look that Evan got when Tommy pointedly ignored him, but Evan would get over it. Evan would go out and find himself some younger guy to get his rocks off with. That or some girl. Maybe a whole plethora of them if that was what he wanted. Tommy would always be the guy that helped him realize that he wasn’t straight, but that was about it. 

One day, they might even laugh and talk about it. Not any time soon though. 

Tommy did still call the guy with the wood carvings and asked about seeing his pieces again. Apparently the Christmas Market was still going, so Tommy drove over on his next day off. 

“Hey, I’m Tommy. We spoke on the phone.” 

“Right. Right. You were interested in something for a friend?” 

Tommy nodded and took a look around. A lot of the bigger pieces were way past the $50 limit but he did find a carving of a dog with a firefighter’s helmet. It was perfect. 

“This one,” Tommy said. 

It wouldn’t be enough, but Tommy had the start of a plan for the rest of Evan’s present. It might even serve as a way to break the ice between them again and put them on a path to being friends. He hoped. Otherwise, it might be awkward at work forever. 

“Thank you,” Tommy said when he was handed the wrapped package. 

“No problem. Hope your friend likes it.” 

He took a quick walk around the rest of the market, found himself buying cookies and this time a hot chocolate at that booth and then he found a tent that he and Evan hadn’t gotten to the last time or that hadn’t been there at all. A rainbow flag stuck out and Tommy found himself smiling a little. 

At one point in his life, he’d abhorred rainbows and everything they represented for him. He’d never wanted to be attached to it, to claim it for his own. Had believed for the longest time that he didn’t deserve the community it provided. Hell, Tommy had never even gone to a pride parade. It happened sometime when he started painting again, where a rainbow had snuck into a painting and then he was adding them where they worked, especially in a painting that was devoid of other color. It felt like finally allowing himself to be more open about himself, a way to accept that he was gay and nothing and no one could change that. 

He approached the tent and found a smiling man behind a small table that served as a counter. There was a display of different colored flags that Tommy couldn’t begin to assign, books on a small bookshelf and novelty t-shirts and tote bags and mugs. 

“Hello,” the man on the other side of the table said. “Looking for anything specific?” 

“Huh, not really. I’m buying for a Secret Santa. The guy I got just recently realized he’s bi.”

“Oh,” the man said. “Well we don’t have a welcome to being queer pack or anything, but you could give him one of our mugs or a book on queer history. There’s some informative ones, some funny ones. But, you know, just because he’s bi doesn’t mean his gift has to be about that.” 

Tommy could tell that there was a level of condescension in the tone and Tommy got it. He got what he looked like and how he passed for straight easily, that he’d leaned on that for a while, maybe so much that he never could be perceived otherwise. 

He picked up one of the mugs. It was cute and a quote he’d seen in a few places, “Harold, they’re lesbians”. Tommy chuckled and put it down again. A few just had a big rainbow going around them, some with gay or lesbian or bi or queer or trans written on them. Then, he saw one with each line in pink, purple, and blue: “Both. Both Is. Good”. On the other side it said: “Chaotic Bisexual”

“This is perfect for him,” Tommy said with a smile. 

Then, he spotted one with a cartoonish rainbow and “Yup, woke up GAY again”. 

“I’ll take this too,” Tommy said. 

The guy raised an eyebrow. 

“For myself,” Tommy said. 

He saw the man behind the counter nod, lips pressed tight. He was the type of guy that fit the stereotype. Someone that could never have hid his sexuality unless he was really trying and maybe he never had found himself in an environment where hiding was the best option. Some people were that lucky. 

He went to the books next. Several of the titles caught his eye including the flashy looking The LGBTQ+ History that told him Evan would have a kick reading. Then, he saw Bi The Way. He wound up picking both. Over the time he’d known Evan, he knew that Evan liked to deep dive into research about pretty random topics. He mostly did that online. The likelihood was that he’d already gone through every possible site on the internet, but these books would be quirky and fun.

“These too,” Tommy said. 

The man nodded. The mugs he’d put in individual boxes. He added everything into a small bag, but didn’t hand it over. 

“What?” Tommy asked. 

“I’m sorry. I just…I assumed you were just—”

“Just some cis straight guy,” Tommy said. “Don’t worry about it.”

“I forget sometimes that the queer experience looks different for everyone. I hope your friend who just came out is glad he has you to help him along the way.” 

Except that Evan hadn’t actually needed that much help from him when it came to the discovery of his sexuality. He hadn’t asked Tommy a single question about being queer or about Tommy’s own history. It was a little unusual, that was for sure.  

He bought a gift bag at another tent and then when he got back home put every component of Evan’s gift inside. He left it right by his tree and he was almost sad to be done with it. His own mug he took into the kitchen. He placed it inside his cabinet and it looked out of place, but Tommy loved it. Maybe one day he would have another mug in there that belonged to someone that fit into Tommy’s life. He didn’t think it would happen, but it was possible. Maybe. 

He tried hard not to picture the mug he’d gotten Evan. That was definitely not going to happen. 

-

“Looks like someone was up all night,” Chim said. 

Buck didn’t even realize Chim was talking to him, but of course he was. And Buck had been up all night. He’d gone down a research spiral. It had started with him looking a little bit further into bisexuality and what it meant for him, but he’d started thinking about Tommy and then that had led straight into Buck just researching art supplies. 

Apparently there was a lot to learn. Not all paints and colored pencils were created equal. That went for brushes and pigments and clay and so many other things. Buck had seen Tommy’s art room twice and he’d noticed that Tommy had a lot of acrylic paint, brushes, and a cup that held pencils. Considering his sketches were all done in pencil, he didn’t think it’d be a bad idea to get him a set of good colored pencils. And so, Buck had gone on a research spiral, but he’d also managed to order some colored pencils and a few different sketchbooks. 

It didn’t seem like enough, but Buck figured with Christmas drawing closer it was better to have something ready to go than not. 

“You do have bags under your eyes, Buck,” Hen said. “Did you get any sleep?” 

“Some,” Buck said. “I’ll get a nap later.” 

Chim nudged his shoulder. “How hot was she to keep you up all night?” 

Buck felt his cheeks go warm. “There was no girl.” 

“Sure,” Chim said. 

“There wasn’t,” Buck said again. 

Tommy walked into the locker room. “What’s happening?” He asked and didn’t look in Buck’s direction. 

Buck felt the avoidance down to his bones. The worst of it was that Buck had never gotten stuck on someone the way he’d gotten stuck on Tommy and they hadn’t even gone on more than a single date. For a second Buck had thought maybe it was that it was a guy and new, but he knew deep down that it was Tommy. 

“Buck is being surprisingly mum about what he got up to last night,” Chim said. 

“Oh,” Tommy said. 

“Nothing. I got up to nothing but shopping for my Secret Santa,” Buck said and he turned so he could look directly at Tommy. “That and a bit of research. That’s all.” 

Tommy turned away. “We all know we would know all the details if Buck did hook up with anyone, wouldn’t we.”

“I did hook up with someone last week. Really hot,” Buck offered. 

“Yeah, I don’t want to hear about that,” Hen said. 

Buck caught Tommy’s eye and he saw Tommy roll his eyes. Buck turned away and finished getting dressed. He didn’t say anything to any of them as he left the locker room and made his way up the stairs hoping that he could actually get a nap on the couch before a call came in. 

[08melancholie]

Amos and Micah's Relationship; The Letter.

I had a quick interaction on twitter about Amos's letter to Micah and GOD, we need to talk about it a little more in-depth, because I am so insane about their relationship.

If you aren't aware, Micah has a brother; Amos Bell. You can find a letter sent back by his brother in response to whatever Micah has written him, which is the following:

You can immediately feel the disdain from Amos to Micah; bluntly threatening him, telling him he wants nothing to do with Micah, etc. and that simply breaks my heart for Micah in the worst way possible. Micah wanted a relationship with his brother, and because of his poor lifestyle, it was all too late, and a relationship of any kind, or reconciling, was out of the question now.

This circles back to their father, of course, Micah Bell II. I feel that blaming him here is justified; but the case is so for a lot of things Micah does/says too. I've talked about how I think that, if Micah got out of the crime lifestyle that he led with his father—like Amos did—he would have had a somewhat normal rest of his life. If you've ever been in this type of situation, being influenced or coerced into something by any authority figure, or even any person in general, you'll know that traditions, opinions and views stick for a long time, and they don't fade out so easily, even after you don't have those people preaching those beliefs to you anymore. Micah could have gotten out no problem, but the next issue would have been getting what his father taught him out of his head. It clearly didn't fade canonically, seeing as he quotes things his father's told him; "Sympathy is for the weak", for example. He quotes it at the fire, saying it's 'one of the thing his daddy's taught him'. I think that, in either scenario, Micah would have been doomed, and that is even worse to me than his current situation.

I'm always curious as to what Micah could have possibly written in that letter. The most hurtful one for me might be knowing Amos has daughters, and that he's an uncle that the girls will never meet, or even know of, probably. Maybe Micah wanted to reconcile to meet them? Can you imagine, if Micah wanted to be an uncle? I think that wouldn't be so out of character, seeing as he never settled and therefore never had any family left other than Amos, so knowing he had nieces might have driven him to write to Amos. And that alone really makes me feel bad, as much as I don't want to feel bad for Micah—I really, really do. Micah wanted a relationship with his brother—and maybe his brother's family—but it could have never been, because of what he 'chose' in his life.

oh boy i am very sad about them :(

[rawrlight]

The Futility of Human Life (Or, More Accurately, An Analysis of the Death Eraser in Death Note)

As I'm sure many of you would agree, any great story usually has the draft before that, and the draft before that, or a pilot version, in which the concept of the story might be similar, but other details might differ greatly.

Death Note is no different. Its first existence was as a oneshot, starring Taro Kagami, who finds a Death Note and, thinking it a normal diary, writes his classmates' names in it, inadvertently killing them.

However, this is where the differences come in; instead of telling him that those killed by the Death Note can't be brought back to life, Ryuk hands him an eraser and tells him that they can. Just by erasing a name, the person can be brought back to life.

Meanwhile, in the final chapter of the final version of Death Note, the writer (Ohba) changes this concept drastically. They reiterate throughout the series that once dead, a person can never come back to life. It's one of the rules of the Death Note, and apparently was so important to the author that the series ends on that note; the image shown above is literally the last page in the final chapter of Death Note. Makes you wonder what happened to Ohba between the pilot and final chapter of the story, doesn't it?

Ohba did add in an interview that the story had to revive the killed characters with the Death Eraser and that he "didn't really care" for that plot device. Read here.

He also mentions here that '[the] basic underlying idea [in Death Note] was that “Humans are not immortals and once they are dead, they do not come back alive again”,' as well as "One of my personal underlying theses in Death Note is that dead people cannot be resurrected and that there is nothing after Death".

I'm not sure why he decided to include the Death Eraser in the pilot version of the manga at all, given his strong views of the world after Death.

But it's certainly interesting to think about, or at least that's the case with me.

One of the probable reasons is the Death Eraser simply isn't a good storytelling device to include---characters' deaths aren't as interesting if their deaths can be reversed. The Death Eraser is a safety net, which obviously dampens the effect of the characters' deaths.

Another reason that's more of a metaphorical one, so to speak, is that death is the end. There's nothing you can do after a name is written in the note as is clarified time upon time again in the series; nothing you can do after death. The creator cements the idea of death being nothingness in our heads, which raises the stakes as all the characters are gambling not only with power, or intelligence even, but with their whole lives. Their fate hinges on a single notebook. It sounds stupid, but if you think about it, the prospect sounds all the more terrifying and bleak.

A nice touch by the creator was ending with the quote shown above. Death is final, and so is the finale of the series. It serves as a reminder that all the characters' deaths in the show are final, and that all their lives ended rather unsatisfactorily, for the sake of a single notebook. Really makes you wonder how fruitless life really is---especially as the final chapter shows the world has gone back to normal after Kira's reign, so all the struggle was for...well, nothing.

And it also teaches us that sometimes---most times, actually---endings aren't neat.

[alchemicaladarna]

You know the quote from The Song of Achilles that's like:

"Name one hero who was happy. You can't."

"I can't."

"I know. They never let you be famous and happy."

And then it goes:

"I'm going to be the first. Swear it."

"Why me?"

"Because you're the reason! Swear it!"

"I swear it."

That's tr!Pangi and tr!Pili to me, and I'm making myself cry thinking about them and this damn book.

[stupidlittlespirit]

Hello!

Sorry if this has already been asked before, but do you have any tips for writing Ford?

Thank you and I'm sending you a virtual hug <3 🫂

Hey!

Thank you so much <3

I'll put some of the stuff I find helps me below here. I find it really hard to describe sometimes so if it doesn't make sense or if you want clarification then let me know :)

Be familiar with the source material. This might sound silly but I've seen fics where the a/n is like 'yeah I haven't read Journal 3 or finished the show but I wanted to write-' .....Please. Just. Finish the show and the Journal. The Journal gives you TONS of useful insight into Ford's actual personality and I think you see a lot more of his mannerisms in it. Rewatch his episodes. Use what you've got of canon stuff.

Watch other stuff with JK Simmons in. It'll be helpful for you to pick up how he sounds and then make it easier replay his tone in your head and make your dialogue more accurate. I don't actually know how helpful this tip is bc I brought this up to my partner (RE: Hearing the character's exact voice in your head as you write) and they said this isn't really something people do, so I'm not sure if I'm alone in that technique or not....? (also sorry Mr Simmons but a lot of your movies are d o g s h i t! So, suffer through them as much as you can for the sake of research. Whiplash isn't in the bad pile though btw, it's one of the greatest movies ever made. Just watch that 14 times in a row until you can quote the entire thing by heart. Or use Portal/Cave Johnson audio. Much more fun.)

Know the Ford you're writing. Is he younger, likely at college? Is he research-era? Is he post-portal? Ford presents (at least to me) as multiple different versions of himself over the course of his journey. He has fundamental traits but the degree to which he displays/shows/acknowledges/applies them varies dramatically depending on where he is in life and who he's around.

Balance him. He's strict and sharp and sometimes rude, but not so much that he's devoid of all other emotion. He's funny and he likes to get silly sometimes. We're literally told that exact thing (quite a lot actually) in the canon material. This is especially relevant if you're writing post portal Ford or pre-Bill/pre-obsession-with-work Ford. Again, he isn't all the time but he definitely is more than people give him credit for. If you're writing Ford during his Bill obsession stage then he's going to be erratic and harmful, more than anything to himself. He's going to be acting poorly because he isn't in his right mind, so extend some sympathy to the guy. You don't have to make it okay that he might be lashing out and hurting others, obviously, but there's a reason behind why he's acting like that. He isn't just 'a bad guy'.

However, he is also an asshole sometimes. Everyone can be. He's very diverse. This diva HAS the range! (He experiences the world in a very different way to most other people, I think, so his behaviour can be perceived as difficult to 'normal' people).

Ford is never one emotion at a time. No character is. If he's angry, there's going to be a reason behind that anger and then several emotions behind that reason. Is he telling someone off because he's intrinsically and irrevocably an asshole? No! He might have been afraid of them getting hurt and snapped at them, and the fear shows as anger. Maybe he's frustrated with them and doesn't know how to appropriately address that frustration. There's always a reason.

If he is just being a bit of jerk, because that's plausible, it's not going to be the case that every time he does something that can be perceived as being jerky, that he is being so.

He is very full of love. For his family, for his work, for his friends, for his object of affection (these tips apply to him in general, if you're writing ship stuff or reader stuff or gen). He is full to the brim with it, he just struggles to identify it, to know how to show it and how to express it.

I think that for Ford, acknowledging his feelings is a bit like touching a hot stove: He recoils from them immediately because feelings are painful and intense, and they're hard to handle. They hurt and he's going to be loathe to keep touching the thing that reliably burns him every time he goes near it. Ford isn't very good at being bad at things and he IS bad at emotions. Really bad. They're not finite or logical or able to be proven like science is. They're artistic and available for interpretation, and they're often nonsensical. That's hard to get your head around for someone who likes to view everything from a black and white perspective.

If you think he has a disorder (autism, BPD, NPD, HPD, whatever) and you yourself don't have that thing, then RESEARCH THE FUCKING THING! Ask people who do have it for advice. Treat it with respect. People that have 'negative traits' from these types of disorders (and believe me, people do think you're awful if you have a personality disorder or autism) are not inherently bad people and them enacting their symptoms doesn't make them evil, provided they know how to acknowledge their wrongdoing post behaviour and try to do better in the future. If I split on someone and act out by starting a fight, it is my responsibility to return to that person and apologise for inappropriately starting a fight once I've cooled down. It can be hard, it can be done through gritted teeth, it will be uncomfortable, but it must still be done because I'm an adult. Obviously, when it comes to things like this, we're always working on a sliding scale because people with complex mental health issues don't always know they've made a mistake so they may not feel like they need to apologise/may not even know that they've done something wrong if they're in a really bad episode. That's difficult to get right however, and I would not recommend writing intensely detailed stuff like that unless you're very used to/accustomed to the disorder.

HE KNOWS HOW TO SAY SORRY and he knows when he's fucked up. This is a skill he's learnt better over time. I think it would be most relevant to use if you're writing him post-portal, though. I don't think this was a skill he had when he was younger/pre-portal and if he did apologise, it was something that had to be really dragged out of him.

Show that he's tender and capable of empathy. I think it was only really during his obsessional years that he locked off that part of his brain, and even then it was more out of pure delusion and trauma/self-protection than it was an inherent drive to be evil. He's never been evil, just misguided, betrayed and a bit of an ass at times.

He does more through action than through talk. In comparison to Stan, who is all mouth and uses verbal communication frequently, Ford is more physically inclined. He tries to be very esoteric but he gives away a lot in his behaviour instead of talking. I don't actually think he knows he does this and that's why he thinks he's super mysterious.

If you're stuck on a scene, play it out as him. Not yourself. It's not so much how am I going to do this, but how is Ford going to do this? What do you think Ford would do in that moment, according to what you've seen him do in the show?

Don't be afraid to make your own Ford, to a certain extent. I'm not writing about a strictly canon!Ford. He's informed by canon for the most part, but he's also my little barbie to dress up and be silly with. I don't necessarily have to solely make him do what I think his canon counterpart would do. I think canon!Ford is aroace/just not interested in romantic or sexual relationships. I don't think he has interest in much of the stuff that my fanon!Ford does, but this is fantasy land and Ford isn't real so we can do whatever we want. He'll feel more real if you give him his canon traits and then add some of your own spices to the recipe on top.

Be nice to him. This isn't advice, I'm just begging you LMAO. When you're writing him talk about his science stuff or whatever, have your other character (reader, I presume?) be engaged and happy to listen to him. I wouldn't be interested in someone who annoyed me with their passions, so don't write it as though he pisses you off because the audience can tell if you don't actually like him that much. They will pick up on how you really feel about a character as the author unless you're an excellent liar and it's really hard to actually lie like that and retain a sense of genuine love in your story. Just treat him with love and care. Treat any character with it.

Okay anyway WHEW that's a lot! Sorry. These are just things that I do and they're not my view of how to write Ford 'correctly' or anything, they're just what I find helps me characterise him for my fics. I'm sure plenty of people would disagree with my interpretation and that's fine, we're all receptive to art in different ways so there's not really a 'right' way to be for the most part. Just listen to what he tells you/shows you about himself and the way in which other characters speak about him truthfully.

[brummiereader]

@zablife this is how I imagined you planning out this storyline...

What a masterpiece, Lee! Arghhh 😍❤️!

I don't think even I could polish up this chaotic Christmas scene 😂. Plus I'm not sure I want to. In fact I'd like to see this play out on the big screen for the laughs 🤣! Lee, this was so funny! You had me giggling throughout the entire story. Not only did you have every character, every OC down to a tee, you brought so much comedic relief to finish off the year and join all our creations and community together into one, fantastic story!

Before I quote anything I have to tell you how you had me absolutely cackling at the mentions below with Rebs character "Sicilian bastard" 🤣! I love it 👌🏼.

Poor Tommy 🤭. This entire Christmas party was something out of, as Clara so adequately put it, "fever dream". I'm not familiar with every OC in this wonderful story but these are some of the lines and moments I loved the most...

Her old friend Irene stepped from the car moments later, arm wrapped snuggly beneath Ada's gloved hand as they ascended the steps of Arrow House. "Are they..." Tommy began. Wait what?? Don't think I was just gonna read past this and not mention it, Lee 😯! Could be just a passing observation, could be something more 🧐🧐.

Don't you be lookin'!" Johnny Dogs scolded as he followed in their wake. This sounded so much like Johnny in my head 😍. And after your dark!Bonnie fic, any mention of Bonnie and I seem to internally combust with giddiness. I think you've unlocked a new blorbo for me Lee 🥴!

Alfie escorted his wife into the drawing room with Rose clutching at her sides, wheezing through tears as she told her husband she'd found a new appreciation for Christmas festivities. 😂, Alfie enjoying Tommy frazzled with the nights festivities is so on point with his character!

Just tryin' to help you dress better," Luca said with a wink. Tommy's jaw clenched at the old insult resurfacing. It was clear Luca would never tire of making jokes at his expense. This made me snort 🤭. He's never gonna stop with those digs about his clothes. And honestly?, I hope he never does because the chaos that ensued when Tommy pulled out his gun was the cherry on the top of this messy evening!

Charlotte dismissed the notion with a soft laugh. "It was no trouble. "Minding Arthur is like minding a sleepy kitten," oh I loved this little line so much. Remove all the rage from him, and he really is just a sleepy kitten in need of strokes 🥰.

"Stephen's taking the piss surely," Clara said as she thumbed through the pages of new characters and scenarios never once mentioned in the show. But I need this piss take on what a christmas with the Shelby's would be like on film now... CANON 🤣! I bet it's not far off from what christmas actually is like with the Shelby's and all their family and friends 🤭.

"Isn't she the one who likes to bring out Tommy's dark side? I'm not sure I want to live with you whilst you channel him!" He's just misunderstood, Clara 🤣! Oooh don't get me giddy 😈. The thought of Cillian channeling dark!tommy with Clara around sounds like the perfect corrupt a wish 🤭.

Lee, this was absolutely brilliant. Well done you! I'm amazed at how you crafted everyone into this seamless story form start to finish ❤️. I've not been in a Christmas mood at all this year, but after reading this story, you've added some cheer and fun to the end of my year. Thank you hun 😘!

Shelby Christmas Spectacular

Summary: The Shelby family and their friends gather for a memorable Christmas party.

A/N: Written for @little-diable Chi's 17K celebration. Two lines in bold are borrowed from the Christmas scene in The Godfather. I admit I deviated from the x reader requirement so I hope that's okay. I wanted to find a way to honor all my moots' lovely OCs. (See the end for credits.) Fair warning this might be the worst thing I've ever written, but at least it was made with love 🤍

Warnings: drinking, cursing, mention of a weapon, mention of illness, hint of nsfw

Frances had been right suggesting the enormous Christmas trees in each room of the Shelby home. Something in her caring nature had sensed the change in Mr. Shelby’s spirits leading up to Christmas Eve. Now her preparations were being praised by Tommy’s partner, Lucy, who went room to room admiring the ornately decorated boughs. She did raise a concern over the candles on the tree in the parlor, wondering if it might be best to extinguish them before John's lot began running circles around the tree. However, she thought better of it knowing Tommy’s trusted man, Don would be standing nearby. 

The gentle giant was a comfort to them both this past year and she trusted him implicitly with the protection of their home. Nothing very bad could happen to you with Don by your side, Lucy thought, recalling the days when he’d saved Tommy from himself when she couldn’t.

As she passed through the hall, a servant delivered a telegram on an ornate silver tray. "Who do you know in Hong Kong, ma'am?" the girl asked with awe struck gaze. Lucy plucked the card from the curious maid, squinting at the small type. Having a grand time. My wife and I will return in January." She read the last line once more in a haze of disbelief.

"So he married her?" Tommy rumbled with satisfaction, pleased to hear his cousin was finally settled with the witty and well-connected Mei Chang. Wrapping his arounds Lucy, he gave her waist a gentle squeeze of appreciation he too had someone loyal by his side.

Lost in their own world, they scarcely noticed the click of Polly's high heels against the polished wood. That is until her voice rose sharply behind them. "Married?" she cried.

Lucy attempted to hide the telegram, but Polly captured it between her fingertips at the last moment, reading the lines that exposed her son's secret.

"Thought that's what ya wanted, Pol," Tommy remarked, only to watch the lines of her face crease in despair.

"I wasn't there, Tommy," she noted sadly.

"We'll have a party as soon as they return," Tommy assured her, glancing tentatively at Lucy who was doing her utmost to bite her tongue. She was perhaps the last person one might expect to give a party in Michael's honor, but the placation seemed to soothe Polly so she didn't object.

There was no time to consider the proposal now anyway, Frances brightly announcing the youngest Shelby siblings, twins Sylvie and Sonya, were on the line from London. Any lingering sadness vanished as Polly practically sprinted into Tommy's office to be the first to speak with them.

A tear came to her eye as she listened to their cheerful greeting which sounded very far away. "I'm sorry I couldn't make the last performance of the year," she apologized, thoughts drifting to their graceful form en pointe.

"It's alright, Pol," Sonya assured her softly.

"We've been so busy with rehearsals, we wouldn't have had time for a proper chat anyhow," Sylvie added.

"I'm coming in the new year then and you'll tell me all about playing Odette, hm?" Polly hummed.

"I ...erm...wasn't chosen as Odette," Sylvie revealed, failing to conceal the bitter disappointment in her voice.

Polly's head snapped up at that moment, ready to battle with the ballet master she longed to torment each time he snubbed her nieces in favor of another dancer. "I'll make a call," she promised, fingers subconsciously stroking the flick knife in her pocket. "No, Pol!" the girls replied in unison.

Polly could only chuckle at their solidarity, knowing they'd have her head if she interfered. They hadn't changed a bit from their days running thru the fens as wild reckless wains who abhorred being told what to do.

"Alright," Polly conceded, relinquishing the knife's handle. "I'll stay out of it so long as you two keep out of trouble. Do you hear?" Even as she said it she didn't believe they would, especially during their upcoming break when they would likely spend their nights in clubs. "No galavanting with Chi!" she added sharply.

"We won't," they replied in static monotone, tired of the lectures about their friend who had been deemed a bad influence after John and Arthur learned of her penchant for priests and professors.

Wishing them a happy Christmas, Polly passed the phone to Tommy who undoubtedly wanted to be sure they'd extended an invitation to tonight's party to Alfie and his wife Rose. Another chorused reply came down the line in one long exasperated sigh. Apparently it was a great insult to suggest they shouldn't have been trusted with the task.

Tommy rolled his eyes as he selected a cigarette from its case, allowing them to playfully berate their older brother about his lack of faith in them. Wishing them well for tonight's performance, he ended the call, eyes drifting toward the cars arriving in a long line down the front drive.

Of course Ada would be the first to appear, her glamorous new style on display for all to see. He smirked to himself as he took in the sight of her bright red lipstick specially ordered in New York and shipped to Boston by the caseful now that she could afford it. His sister had dressed to impress this evening and he was curios to see who she'd chosen to escort her when he nearly choked at the sight.

Her old friend Irene stepped from the car moments later, arm wrapped snuggly beneath Ada's gloved hand as they ascended the steps of Arrow House. "Are they..." Tommy began.

"Together?" Lucy offered, meeting Tommy at the window. She only shrugged at the question, uncertain of the details, though she quickly made a note to find out.

The car no one seemed to be able to place was the expensive Bentley, a newer model which put Tommy's to shame. As Bonnie and Vano passed, a long, low whistle rose from their mouths in appreciation of such a fine automobile.

"Don't you be lookin'!" Johnny Dogs scolded as he followed in their wake. "M not just gonna be lookin'," Vano whispered as he jabbed Bonnie in the ribs. His eyes roved the emerald green paint and polished chrome accents, a mischievous grin tugging at the corners of his mouth. Nodding politely to the driver now exiting the car, he thought of nothing but a carefree joy ride later when no one would know he was missing.

He might have thought the car was impressive, but his jaw dropped at the sight of who exited moments later. A strikingly beautiful woman with tan skin and dark hair adjusted a scandalously low cut gown beneath her fur.

"Who is that?" he asked Bonnie.

"That's Eva Nelson and you best not look at her either, dinlow!" Bonnie advised, averting his gaze as Jack Nelson glowered at them. "He'll take a garrote to your balls for less," he gulped.

Vano only chuckled in reply, the cloak of youth and stupidity providing ample protection against Bonnie's warnings.

"Thought you were here to see Evie?" Bonnie remarked, watching his friend carefully.

"I am," Vano replied, straightening his jacket to impress Mr. Shelby.

As they reached the front door, they were quickly parted by a large slobbering animal barreling toward Tommy. As the enormous mastiff left a shining trail of saliva in puddles along the carpet, his owners followed behind with wide smiles.

"Tommy!" Alfie called out, arms outstretched in cheerful greeting, his cane nearly bashing Bonnie on the head.

"Alfie," Tommy barely acknowledged, preoccupied with the whereabouts of the dog. "And Cyril," he added with a slight start to his voice and a wince upon hearing the crash of something breakable in the next room.

"We couldn't bear to leave him alone for the night. I hope you don't mind," Rose commented with airy nonchalance. "Besides we know how fond you are of him." It was clear by the barely concealed grin of impish delight she knew that to be false. Alfie couldn't help the roar of laughter upon seeing Tommy's reddening face only made worse by the appearance of a distraught Evie.

"Dad, my ducks!" she shrieked, waiving her hands in perplexed gesturing which told him nothing of the flapping and honking created in Cyril's wake.

Momentarily distracted by the half-eaten wheel of cheese in Evie's hand, Rose began to snicker. They were full fledged giggles by the time Polly came rushing in to chide the teen. "For fucks sake, Evie, put that back!"

In a failed attempt to hide the cheese behind her back, she felt Polly tug her arm away to assess the damage. Noting the prominent teethmarks gnawed savagely into the rind, Polly cast a horrified glance at Tommy who was pinching the bridge of his nose to stave off an inevitable headache. He would need more than the one permitted drink to get through tonight, he thought.

After Arthur had been found drunk in the stairwell earlier in his Santa costume, he'd promised Lucy to stay sober in order to chaperone. Now the job would have to fall to nurse Charlotte as Tommy urgently motioned for a maid to bring him three fingers of whisky.

Then he called for another at the sight of Finn stumbling from a nearby closet, Santa suit around his ankles and striped underpants on display for all to see. "What the fuck are you doing, eh?" Tommy asked in exasperation, assuming Finn had shirked his duty in favor of more amusing activities. "Pull your trousers up, there are children here," he hissed at his younger brother.

Clutching at the fuzzy red material, Finn retorted, "It's the bloody kids who pulled 'em down. What did Esme put in those cakes?" Just then a chorus of war whoops erupted down the corridor, a sugar fueled search party giving chase. Finn scrambled away as they rounded the corner, continuing to hunt their uncle in manic delight.

Alfie escorted his wife into the drawing room with Rose clutching at her sides, wheezing through tears as she told her husband she'd found a new appreciation for Christmas festivities.

Jack and Eva Nelson were not as amused by the scene before them, Eva making snide comments about everything from their pitiful decorations to the lack of champagne. Jack didn't attempt to correct her, hoping to stay on her good side long enough to fuck on Shelby's desk later. A literal and figurative fuck you to his former business partner.

Blissfully ignorant to the scheme being concocted before him, Tommy leaned into Polly to discuss another pressing matter. "Pol, there are some people here not on the list." He eyed Luca Changretta, wondering when his old enemy had snuck past his guards.

As he approached the uninvited guest, he quickly realized Luca wasn't alone. A petite blonde with a slight baby bump took Luca's hand, her warm smile melting the ice in Tommy's cool stare.

"I don't believe we've met. I'm Emily Changretta," the woman announced cheerfully. "You have a lovely home," she complimented her host.

"Thank you," Tommy managed with a tight smile. Turning to Luca he asked through gritted teeth, "And why are you in my home, Mr. Changretta?"

Luca shrugged as he attempted to apologize for the business with Solomons last year, a gesture Emily insisted upon to clear the air before their child was born. He stumbled as he chose his words, the act of humility quite unfamiliar to him. "Anyway...I come baring gifts to show there's no hard feelings on my end," Luca confided, reaching into his jacket pocket.

Misreading the gesture, Tommy pulled his revolver from his side at lightning speed. Seconds later he heard another gun cock beside him, realizing Don had been watching in the shadows.

As the crisis unfolded, Emily shielded her bump with an ear piercing shriek. She watched as Luca raise his hands into the air, a good natured chuckle tumbling from his lips as he assured her, "It's okay, honey. They don't trust nobody." He instructed her to remove a small box from his pocket and she did so with trembling hands. Holding it up for Tommy to see, Luca lightly shook the contents with a taunting smile.

Tommy could only sigh in relief as he holstered his gun and gave Don the signal to stand down. Reflexes sharp with lingering adrenaline, Tommy deftly caught the box as it came sailing through the air at him. As it clicked open an expensive set of gold engraved cufflinks sparkled back at him from the velvet lining and he furrowed his brow in confusion.

"Just tryin' to help you dress better," Luca said with a wink. Tommy's jaw clenched at the old insult resurfacing. It was clear Luca would never tire of making jokes at his expense.

Apparently that wasn't the only thing he had in mind to annoy Tommy, having brought a Sicilian business associate with him as well. Stefano Spinietta was a loathsome man who wore too much hair pomade and reeked of pungent cologne which lingered in every room he passed through. He also boasted endlessly about his family's importance and a girl back home desperate to become part of it.

As Lucy became the fifth person to hear his speech, she rolled her eyes and whispered to her horse trainer May, "I'd wager a tenner that Nina despises him more than I do." Needing a break from the head splitting boredom of the self important little man, Lucy went in search of better company. She felt a bit guilty leaving Ethel and May to chat with him, but knew they were more than capable of handling the pretentious weasel with their caustic wit.

In no time she found Ada and Irene, the women showering her with compliments on her new velvet green dress. "Please thank your mum for me, Irene. She really outdid herself this time," Lucy requested.

"She's the best dressmaker in Small Heath," Irene agreed.

"I think you both share that honor," Ada reminded her with a proud grin. She never tired of discussing Irene's gift for working with fabrics, even if the woman was too modest to admit her talent.

"Have you seen the dress Arthur bought for Heaven?" Irene asked, changing the subject to something other than herself.

"She looked stunning until Arthur vomited down the front," Charlotte replied, joining the conversation and the party for the first time that evening.

"Charlotte! I'm so sorry Tommy saddled you with Arthur tonight," Lucy apologized. She quickly filled a cup with punch and offered it to their employee turned close personal friend.

Charlotte dismissed the notion with a soft laugh. "It was no trouble. "Minding Arthur is like minding a sleepy kitten," she assured Lucy, clinking their glasses together in a show of solidarity.

"Not like Tommy then?" Lucy joked, everyone now thankfully able to laugh at the times Tommy had cursed and thrown things at the woman tasked with helping him walk again.

"God, Tommy was more like a savage lion!" Charlotte quipped, earning a hearty laugh from Lucy.

"Still is!" Lucy added jovially.

The women had hardly noticed Heaven appear, despite the stark contrast of her flowing white hair in a sea of brunettes. She had fashioned a new outfit out of the clothes she packed for the next day and somehow looked even more stunning than when she arrived.

"Heaven's back!" Ada exclaimed, waving her over to them.

Making her way through the crowd, Heaven appeared anxious and a bit out of place until they realized why. In her right hand, she awkwardly held the wrist of a little boy shivering of cold and clutching a stuffed toy to his chest.

Knowing that Heaven never knew what to do around children, Lucy took the lead. "Who have you got there?" she asked, looking down at the small child with a look of pity. His clothes looked far too thin for the weather and his teeth chattered loudly despite the gramophone playing a spirited jazz tune.

Heaven only shrugged, releasing the boy's hand as Lucy bent down to have a chat with him. "My name's Lucy. What's yours, love?" she asked in a warm, welcoming voice.

"Isaac, ma'am," the polite child replied, shifting his weight as he grew nervous with the attention of so many people.

"And who have you got there?" she asked, pointing to the toy he was squeezing beneath one arm.

"Mr. Giraffe," he sniffed before falling silent once more.

"Hello, Mr. Giraffe, what brings you all this way?" Lucy asked the toy animatedly.

Eyes flicking down to the well loved friend he always carried, Isaac confessed, "He's here to see Mr. Shelby. We need to ask a favor for my mum."

Lucy stared up at Ada and Heaven who only returned quizzical looks. None of them had ever seen the boy before and they certainly didn't know of his ailing mother, bed ridden back in town. However, the toy now looked familiar to Ada who gently asked to see it.

As Isaac held the one eyed friend to her patiently, she gasped at the recollection of Tommy donating it after Florence left home. The child was indeed telling the truth that he knew her brother. She nodded determinedly to Lucy, taking Isaac by the hand to see Tommy.

He was a brave lad, asking Tommy for help without tears and was swiftly rewarded with treats and the company of the other children. He settled in beside them as Emily taught them card games, whispering her best tips for counting cards. By the end of the evening Isaac was driven home with a belly full of cake and a doctor to see to his mum.

Waving goodbye from front steps, Tommy and Lucy stood arm in arm beneath a star filled sky. They sighed in unison, the long day wearing on them both.

"It's been quite a night, hasn't it?" Tommy recollected, too tired to think of the guests still lingering inside or the enormous mess to be cleaned after Cyril chased Evie's ducks through the lower level of the house bringing a couple of Christmas trees crashing down.

"And we've Michael and Mei's wedding breakfast to plan," Lucy pointed out.

Tommy hummed in recognition, no further words spoken between them. Lucy merely offered the comfort of her presence without the need to fill the silence. However, internally she was going over Frances' unofficial count of the mayhem: 12 guests too drunk to drive, 11 frantic maids to serve them, 10 pound missing from the safe, 9 bottles of whisky consumed, 8 stolen hubcaps, 7 smashed vases, 6 traumatized ducks, 5 suspiciously sticky piles of paperwork in Tommy's office, 4 men in need of stitches, 3 carpets needing cleaning, 2 overturned trees with broken ornaments and 1 ruined Santa suit.

She vowed not to think of it all now. Not when she'd yet to have a dance with Tommy. So she gently guided him inside to sway beneath a sprig of mistletoe. Resting her head on her lover's shoulder, she leaned into his strong frame with a contented sigh.

"What do you want for Christmas?" Tommy asked.

"Me? Oh, just you," she admitted with a giggle.

"Was tonight everything you wanted?" he inquired thoughtfully, cheek pressed to the top of her head.

She nodded slowly, grazing her cheek against his shirt front. "Everyone together and no fucking fighting?!" she exclaimed it like the miracle it was.

"We pulled it off," Tommy announced, leaning in for a celebratory kiss.

The tender moment was soon interrupted by Arthur's rough voice and the sound of mud caked boots sliding on hardwood. Still half drunk, Arthur staggered into the room. Pushing his hair from his forehead, he grumbled, "Fookin' kids!"

"Who, Arthur?" Lucy snapped.

"Isaiah and Vano are fightin' in the garden, Tom," Johnny Dogs finished the thought as he poked his head around the door frame. "Somethin' about Evie," he shrugged.

"Fuckin' hell," Tommy huffed, striding out to confront his daughter's suitors.

"Daddy, wait!" Evie cried out as she heard him stomping down the hall toward the back door. She grabbed hold of his coat tails, attempting to halt her father and his infamous temper.

"It was nice while it lasted," Lucy commented, holding up the hem of her gown to rush after them.

------------------

"It's rubbish isn't it?" Cillain asked, peering over the script he'd been reading aloud for the past twenty minutes.

A snort of laughter erupted from across the sofa, Clara's hand clapping over her mouth to stifle her giggles. "I didn't want to say anything..." she began before Cillian cut her off with a hearty laugh of his own.

"You didn't have to," he noted, tossing the pages aside as he pulled his wife into his arms. Cocooning her in his warm embrace they sat for some time silently considering the confidential pages of the Peaky holiday special.

"Stephen's taking the piss surely," Clara said as she thumbed through the pages of new characters and scenarios never once mentioned in the show. "It reads like..." she attempted to find the least offensive term to describe the disjointed work.

"A screwball comedy," Cillian offered.

"I was going to say fever dream," she confessed, looking up at her husband's striking blue eyes to determine how serious he was about the project.

"I know what you're thinking," he smirked, taking her chin in his hands. "But we'll hire Brummie to polish it for us and it'll be grand."

Clara gave him a worried look, "Isn't she the one who likes to bring out Tommy's dark side? I'm not sure I want to live with you whilst you channel him!"

"What about the American?" he asked with a deep sigh.

"K? I do enjoy the sentimental moments she creates," she remarked wistfully. "But I don't know why you're disregarding the other projects you've been sent. The romantic comedy about the tattoo artist with purple hair or the drama with the Kurdish Italian academic?"

However, he hadn't quite been listening, another thought suddenly stealing his attention. “You know, if we did this holiday thing, Marianne would be perfect for Lucy,” he mused, thinking of the enormous success of his friend's recent play and her rave reviews.

"You're actually entertaining the idea?" Clara asked hesitantly.

"Well I don't have to decide tonight. Let's forget about it for now, yeah?" he suggested, eyes growing heavy. "I want to enjoy the peace and quiet while we have the house to ourselves."

"A silent night," Clara agreed with a nod, leaning in for a deep kiss that would surely distract them both.

-----------------

Credits:

Brummie (as herself) @brummiereader

Charlotte (Tommy's nurse) @toms-cherry-trees

Chi (as herself) @little-diable

Clara Murphy (Cillian's wife) @cillmequick

Don (Tommy's employee and lover) @the-makingsofgreatness

Emily (Luca's wife) @darklydeliciousdesires

Ethel (May's gf) @shelbydelrey

Eva (Jack's wife) @evita-shelby

Evie (Tommy's adopted daughter) @novashelby

Heaven (Arthur's wife) @call-sign-shark

Isaac (boy from Small Heath) @garrison-girl-08

Jiyan-a.k.a "the Kurdish Italian academic" (Cillian's love interest in Shadow of the Sea) @lunarubra

K (as herself) @runnning-outof-time

Lucy (Tommy's partner) @mischievouslittlecreature

Marianne (Cillian's theater protege) @look-at-the-soul

Mei (Michael's wife) @vivianleighwishesshewasme

Mr. Giraffe (Florence Shelby's stuffed toy) @teenwolf-theoriginals

Quinn-a.k.a "the purple haired tattoo artist" (Tommy's love interest in Misadventures) @moral-terpitude

Rose (Alfie's wife) @justrainandcoffee

Stefano (Sicilian bastard) @peakyswritings

Sylvie & Sonya (Tommy's twin sisters) @pacifymebby

Vano (a gypsy boy travelling with the Golds) @wonderlanddreamer

------------

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