#this potter is fucking hilarious

[claypigeonpottery]

and here’s the second image, of the bottom of this piece

it definitely should have been posted too! firstly because it’s hilarious and secondly because the artist, Dave Zackin, signed his name

[wolfpants]

A wee advent/yule gift for @tackytigerfic - Tacky! I hope you enjoy this soft, moody little present I made for you. Thank you for being wonderful. 🌟

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All Is Calm, All Is Bright | E, 6.6k

Tags: EWE, angst and feels, infidelity, minor Draco/Ernie, Christmas markets, drinking & talking, menswear, photographer Harry, Ministry employee Draco, oral sex, anal sex, brief mention of using the services of a sex worker

Draco is leaving his husband. He needs Harry to be the first to know.

He drives east, in the opposite direction of both of their homes, and turns onto the Embankment, following the steady, buzzing flow of nighttime traffic. The entire time, he feels Draco’s eyes on him, and when Harry allows himself to look back, he catches the glitter of Christmas lights reflecting in the pale sheen of Draco’s skin, his hair. Something warm and achy and just a bit shameful tugs deep at the centre of Harry’s chest.  It’s a feeling he’s used to, a feeling that has become easier to push down as the years stretch on between them. Occasionally, it’ll rear its awful head, usually during passing, quiet moments that take Harry off guard: when Draco looks particularly good in a waistcoat, when he makes a distinctively biting observation, when he laughs too generously at one of Harry’s stupid jokes but then follows it up by calling him a silly twat. Sometimes, it’s simply when Draco looks at him—just like that.

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thank you so much to my little elves/betas: @hoko-onchi-writes@citrusses@maesterchill you're all absolute darlings

read all is calm, all is bright on ao3

[glassy-eyed-poet]

I just want to love someone who matches my level of pettiness (regulus and james in yeah my boyfriend's pretty cool (but not as cool as me) by paintmegry)

Currently kicking my feet and giggling at the sexual tension heehee

[padfoot-and-leo-ao3]

Sirius Black is goals tbh

Just look at him

He's so pretty

[lilithofpenandbook]

Imagine Snape stitching that oh-so-famous thing Rishi Sunak said about having to go 'without' a Sky box because he was So Poor boo hoo, and Snape stitching that with "When I was a child I had to wear my mum's old blouse and my dad's jacket because we couldn't afford any clothes"

[camgoloud]

anybody on here read fucking. uh. the magicians

[scorpiusmalfoylovesoscarwilde]

al would totally wear all black, except ridiculous bright and colourful patterned socks that scorpius buys him on every occasion possible

[pussysidon]

Terrible idea: every five years a popular book or book series gets re-written by a randomly selected author. The chosen author can do whatever they want with the series as long as it's cannon compliant

[padfootastic]

i’m having harry + jilypad parenting thoughts again

[the-sun-is-also-a-star]

marauders madagascar au with james as alex, sirius as gloria, remus as melman and peter as marty

[james-sunshine-potter]

The thing is…

If people say that Sirius is Rodrick Heffley (which they are right to say), well that makes Regulus Greg.

Which… isn’t too far off. It also means Regulus has the cheese touch… gross.

[sxnshxnxxnddxxsxxs-fics]

somewhat based off this post

one day i might write a one shot where dean is from east and therefore speaks east-londonese. idk why or how maybe he bumps into someone from hogwarts on green street maybe something else.

but i fear it might be too niche.

[lawfullyneutralbee]

I just realized that the Derry Girls are set in the 90s….

And Harry Potter is also set in the 90s???

So These teens

ARE ESSENTIALLY THE SAME AGES AT THE SAME TIME

You know it makes sense and it doesn’t. This is a fascinating concept. Like I knew both these things but never thought about it as true.

“Ya know if it wasn’t for him being British Harry would be a massive Ride”

“What kind of a fuckin name is Hermione? We’re your parents masochists?”

I can’t 😭

[therulerofallpotatos]

Harry Potter Universe having a great curse on their reality (author who is a bigot designing civilizations like this will have no effect on the implications). "God" aka "the author" aka Rowling being defeated irl will lift the curse on the universe she created. and because they're magic we have like Harry in his 40s going about his day like "I sense....a great evil has been lifted"

[act-more-like-a-dog-sirius]

Deadass one of the most underratedly hilarious things in Harry Potter is Hagrid explaining the absolute nonsensical garbage ass wizard currency system and saying “17 Sickles in a Galleon, and 29 Knuts to a Sickle. Simple enough”.

Like my dude. My guy. My very large friend. There is nothing and I mean nothing whatsoever that’s simple about that. That financial system makes actual negative sense

It’s fucking worse than how the numeric system in the French language. That’s 493 Knut’s in a galleon. That’s some real bullshit right there

[a-penchant-for-the-lethe]

Now I present: some marauder & co. headcannons from my sister, who only knows about them through my ramblings

Pandora never goes anywhere without a hair clip/claw. (She has a huge collection of enchanted clips aswell like butterfly shaped clips that flap their wings and bird clips that chirp.)

Emmeline still has a rock that her crush gave her in 1st grade. (she can't even remember the name of the person who gave it to her, but she can't bring herelf to get rid of it )

Marlene eats outside whenever she can, and the others have to follow her out because they can barely convince her to come inside when it's raining or windy, so they have a snowballs chance on a nice day.

Nobody's ever seen Barty in pants. Like he only ever wears shorts. He wears dress pants for Reggie's wedding n everybody has an aneurysm.

James and Evan secretly watch cartoons together at night when neither of them can sleep. It started by coincidence, and now it's just habit. Only Lily knows because she walked on them seven episodes deep and going strong at like six in the morning on her way to get a bowl of cereal.

They all have puns that drive everyone insane. (Like Siriously, oh deer, saying ahwoo instead of ow, ect.) but Peter says for Pete's sake literally whenever he wants them to stop doing something. For his sake. He thinks he's so funny. They think its annoying, but usually it works because they have to stop what their doing to groan at him, so he's a genius, really.

Frank's pranks everybody on april 1st. He was the pranking master. [I told my sister that it's funny she says that because the marauders are known to be the pranksters and she said: "No. He's the one who taught them all their tricks. On april 1st they live in fear. Except for Dorcas who 'ain't scared of that bitch', "

[When pressed about his personality, she says that: Frank's just a goofy guy.]

[ I asked her who gets the most bitches and she responded, without a doubt: Narcissa. So...] Narcissa gets bitches confirmed.

Narcissa is silver. Her hair, her jewelry, her clothes. Narcissa just is silver.

Alice is gold. She wears an absolutely ludicrous amount of bangles and hairtyes (but can never find any when she need them), she also collects bracelets she find on the ground (like the beaded ones).

Lily's needs reading glasses she just never wears them because she can never find them. (They're an ugly tiger-print orange in a neon green case that should be pretty easy to find, but the case is always empty, and the ornage blends into the common room decor)

Sirius’s is tiny, so he needed a stool to reach the kitchen sink at the Potter's for years, and they just never bothered to get rid of it. (The first time Remus joins them at the Potter's and sees Sirius’s stool, he laughs so hard he cries, and Sirius dosen't speak to him until dinner.)