#this post is more for me than anyone else tbh
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You mentioned omegaverse in the surreal DC reblog where he’s commenting far too much on Charles’s smell lol and it made me wonder if you’ve ever considered writing omegaverse Charlos? Do you have any interest or not so much your thing?
Love your work <33333
Hello! ❤️ I didn't used to be into omegaverse very much tbh, but something clicked in the last couple years and I started to vibe with it a lot more. I actually did start to write an abo charlos fic, that's also a Victorian-era royalty arranged marriage situation (woo that's a mouthful 😂), but I haven't added much to it in a while...
The funny thing is that I find myself forgetting it's abo while writing bc there's so much else going on, and then I have to throw in a line about someone's scent asghfjlslsdk. But anyway, I'm gonna share a little more of it now just because I feel like it's been a while since I posted a fic or a snippet...
“Charles.”
Impatience has crept into his mother’s voice by the second utterance of his name, and yet Charles still takes the time to finish the page he’s reading before clapping the (dreadfully boring) book shut and looking up at her expectantly. As usual, she doesn’t look particularly amused by his stubbornness.
“Charles, I was thinking that perhaps you and I should stay away from the palace for an additional month or so.”
“What?” he frowns. “Why?”
“To rest,” she suggests. “It’s been a very tough week, and you still don’t look well-”
“Maman,” he sighs, rubbing his temple where a headache is starting to form. Of course, he won’t tell her that. “I feel fine. And I’m ready to go home. We already missed Uncle’s birthday. We are not missing Papa’s.”
His mother doesn’t reply. It’s not the first time she’s brought it up, and it won’t be the last, but Charles isn’t losing this particular argument. Not even if he has to escape back to the palace himself. A week away from his father in his poor condition is already too much to bear, let alone the prospect of more time apart.
Charles and his mother’s retreat to their country residence had been unavoidable. The ‘very tough week’ in question is Charles’ heat, which had been brought on early due to the stress he's been under, caused by his numerous advisors' renewed efforts as of late to convince him to sign the regency order. No doubt they’ll be hoping that now, weakened by five days of fever and delirium, he’ll feel further compelled to relinquish his power to a regent in the event of his father’s death before he’s come of age.
It’s never going to happen, and his mother doesn’t need to try to protect him by hiding him away for a month either. She, along with everyone in that damned palace, treats him delicately enough as it is. Ever since he’d presented around eleven years old, he’s been wrapped in cotton wool. But just because he’s an omega doesn’t mean he isn’t perfectly capable of standing up for himself. In fact, he can’t wait to be free of the silly protective measures that were put in place almost seven years ago. The moment he’s crowned, he’s doing away with all of it.
“Really, Charles. I hope you’re not upset we had to come here. You know that it’s for your own safety-”
“Yes, maman, I know,” he interrupts, then sighs and aims a small smile her way to soften his exasperated tone. “I’m not arguing that. But I don’t need any more time to recover. It isn’t as though I do much more than this in the palace, anyway.”
Reading books, painting, playing piano and chess - there isn’t much more that he’s allowed to do. The other activities that his brothers partake in, like horse riding and archery, aren’t permitted for him, nevermind that he performed them just fine before he’d presented. That argument has never worked to convince anyone to grant him allowances because it’s not really about whether he’s capable.
“Well...if you’re certain.”
“I am,” he says, firmly. His mother nods.
Good. That’s settled, then. She speaks again before he has a chance to reopen his book.
“The other thing I’ve been meaning to discuss with you - your uncle has invited the Sainz siblings to come and stay at the palace. You met their two eldest when you were very young, but I’m sure you don’t remember.”
“No,” Charles confirms, intrigued. “Who are they?”
“Their father is a Spanish duke, and his son, Prince Carlos, is just a few years older than you. Unlikely that he will ever inherit the throne, but it is a distant possibility.”
Ah. So a marriage prospect, then. Charles bites back a sigh. From one prison to another.
“You should get to know him better,” his mother says, reading his expression.
“Why?” he asks, just to be difficult. He knows very well why.
“Because. Your Uncle Thierry thinks it’s a good idea.”
Well, if his uncle thinks it, then so it shall be.
Charles sinks further into his chair, grabbing the book he’d set aside and reopening it pointedly. His mother takes the hint. (The book may be a dull one, but at least it serves its purpose as a conversation ender superbly.)
****
“Monaco could be a very important chess piece in future conflicts,” Caco explains, leaning against the table to address his young cousin. “It is under the military protection of France, and having the force of France at our disposal could be instrumental in quelling potential unrest.”
Carlos Junior looks up at him from his seat at the desk, notes of skepticism in his expression. He doesn’t make an objection just yet - his cousin would not be telling him this unless it had come from his father directly.
Caco sets down a piece of paper in front of him. It’s a drawing of a young man who can’t be more than eighteen, his boyish features evident even in sketch form. The other thing that is undeniable is his beauty, a sense of mischief and innocence dancing in his eyes that has Carlos wondering if it’s a faithful representation.
“Is he this pretty in person?”
Caco simply gives him a look, not dignifying that with a response. “That is Prince Charles, heir apparent to the Monegasco throne, seventeen years old. In the next few weeks, you will study everything there is to know about him - his favorite novels, plays, composers. You will brush up on your French-”
“Wait, wait, cousin,” Carlos interjects, blinking in confusion. “What does a prince have to do with me?”
“That omega...” Carlos’ gaze shoots up to his cousin, brows raising. “...has everything to do with you.”
Ah. That changes things, indeed.
“As I was saying,” Caco continues, sighing. “In order to keep the prince safe, he’s been kept sheltered from his father’s court for years, ever since he was a boy. Thus, when he does make a rare public appearance, such as at the opera or ballet, his mere presence causes quite a stir.”
Carlos’ eyes return to the paper in front of him, his gaze tracing a path over the prince’s nose and settling at the elegant curve of his lips.
“You must win his favor before anyone else has the chance,” his cousin says. “The first visit in a few weeks’ time will be vital. We can afford no mistakes. But always remember, you are first and foremost a Sainz. Do not forget the reason behind all of this, no matter how ‘pretty’ his face.”
Carlos tries to bite back his smirk, but likely fails from the look his cousin sends him.
“Charm him, Carlos. Make him smile. God knows you are good at that. The rest will be up to fate.”
#maybe this'll inspire me to write more of this au 🙄#i've just been in a little bit of a rut with f1 fic writing lately#lacking motivation#but i AM getting sucked back into dinluke...😅#rpf#charlos#anon#ask#victorian au#omegaverse#abo#wip
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Hey, so as a person who'll be legal next year, I don't know what exactly happened here with minors (I was at school), but regardless I wanted to say sorry that you have to deal with that. You shouldn't have to deal with people who Don't Listen, especially people around my age.
I also wanted you to know that I absolutely love your AU as a whole. The storyline and art genuinely make my brain go in all sorts of good directions, and tbh the art style is inspiring my own a bit.
Hope you're doing well
Just some minors interacting with a clearly labeled "Minors Do not Interact" post in bold and big letters like as if that's not in place there to shield them away from the nsfw. I even hid the damn thing under a cut so that they can walk away from it without being exposed in case of accidental encounters
What's worse was that the minor in question was the first to even interact with it before anyone else and that pisses me off just how easily they ignored the many warning signs in place, all to comment a damn flustered emoji. like flashing a bright neon sign of "DON'T GO INTO THE SCARY DARK HOLE" in their face but they think "eh. I can handle it"
I understand that most teens have the mindset of thinking they're more mature and can handle 18+ content, and no one at that age really realizes how immature that mindset is until they reach the same age as we do because they're all too excited and blinded at the idea of being "adults", doing "adult" things... But still. Come on. Just read the sign and respect it.
I promise you, you will not regret it, and you are not missing out on anything because it's not for you in the first place.
At least you seem cool, right on tho anon, right on
Thanks for being inspired with my art and for liking my silly little story :3 This AU has certainly become bigger than what I had initially in mind but honestly? I love writing and making stuff for it, and I'm very thankful to have an audience that is as enthusiastic to learn about it's world as I am eager to tell it. It's literally a storyteller's dream come true :')
#thanks for the ask!#Ziku's insane rambles#tadc#tadc au#harlequin au#tadc harlequin au#the amazing digital circus#when there is a post called “minors dni”. And you are a minor. DO NOT INTERACT.#clearly I have to repeat that mantra since no one listens to it unless it's drilled into their skulls#This applies to suggestive content either#as suggestive IMPLIES 18+ content happening. or is making a joke in reference to an 18+ topic#those warnings are there to PROTECT YOU#DON'T IGNORE THEM. You'll get your time to be accepted into these spaces eventually#but for now just literally be on your merry way#it's not that hard I promise
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Heyyy hahaha Bistro Huddy fancast time. FOH first
Bridgette - Ellie Kemper. No one can disagree with this one… The hair, the sweet personality she had in ‘The Office’, her manners, all very much Bridgette
Aaron - Jesse Eisenberg. hes known for goofy, nerdy, unlikable characters (even though theyre all very likeable) a perfect Aaron, id say
Nicole - Emma Stone. I KNOW everyones heart is set on Jennifer Lawrence but Emma Stones snappy comebacks are so perfect and her dry and sarcastic humor just fits Nicole i cant explain it.. anyway everyone’s entitled to their own fancasts so! Just my opinion
Brad - Jason Bateman or John Krasinski … i cant pick tbh
Clint - Jason Segel. Jason js has that sexy bartender vibe likeeeeee
BOH now
Joey - Jake Johnson YES CHEFFFFF MMMMMM. Sorry… Nick from ‘New Girl’ is a realist, he flies off the handle, and he cares about the people in his life even if he doesnt show it…. Thats Joey baby
Ruby - Natasha Lyonne. This one im really passionate about so dont you dare come at me
Pickles - Danny Pudi. Am i biased for this one? Yes a little bit… pickles is my fave and danny pudi is my fav actor ever so yes… maybe a little bit. But still theyre both so cute i love rhem sm my pookies
Nico - Julio Macias. Now this one I wasn’t sure about bc nico has gorgeous hair but i feel like we can move past it… maybe..
#bistro huddy#bistro huddy fandom#is that a tag???#the bistro huddiers#lmfaooo#anyway#this post is more for me than anyone else tbh
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"Administratively, too, [...] queens were considered the legal lords of their landholdings. [...] Grants noted that the queen's officials had administrative autonomy without being subject to the king or anyone else, and evidence of the same assumption can be gleaned from court rolls that were recorded with headings indicating the lord of the manor whose court proceedings were being enrolled. As an example, some court rolls for the manor of Haveringatte-Bower specified that it was the court of [Margaret of Anjou] that was in session, while later rolls recorded Elizabeth Woodville as the lord of the manor court."
-Michele Seah, 'My Lady Queen, the Lord of the Manor': The Economic Roles of Late Medieval Queens", Parergon, Volume 37, Number 2, 2020.
#queenship tag#margaret of anjou#elizabeth woodville#I really appreciated how Seah acknowledged the uneven surviving evidence for her subjects and how that affects her analysis.#It was very brief but it was more than what most historians do so it was very refreshing :)#my post#english history#this is for @ anon who asked if its true that Margaret mostly hosted her own courts while EW mostly stayed with her husband#I'm not sure which (if any) historian has said something like this* but I highly doubt it's true !#We don't really have solid itineraries in place for either queen to make any kind of firm conclusions of the sort#(ie: about their residences or anything else) though I'm sure it would have varied depending on the situation#But either way it's explicitly clear that both Margaret and Elizabeth held their own courts in their own lands on multiple occasions#And we also have evidence of both of them residing with their husbands in regular circumstances#*tbh this is too long to get into right now but this assumption does fit into the few 'revisionist' interpretations of both Margaret and EW#(which imo is just as degrading as her traditional interpretation for the latter) so I wouldn't be surprised if some#historians may have framed their situations in such a way and relied entirely on their own assumptions to do so#Either way as far as I know there is no evidence of any such contrast existing - at least not on a consistent basis.#and the evidence we do have contradicts the assumption#Hope this helps! I figured a proper excerpt from this article would clarify the point better than any direct answer from me <3#also in case anyone was wondering I *think* the title ('My Lady Queen the Lord of the Manor') was referring to administrative accounts#of EW based on what Seah wrote here - though ofc I'm not sure#queue
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#ok im making one more dot post and then i am (hopefully) getting off tumblr and going to bed#liam payne#death#i do suggest not reading tbh because its just gonna be waffle. anyways#ive distanced myself from the boys for years for a multitude of reasons. mainly that they did things that disappointed me and i realised the#way i was attatched to them was unhealthy. so for the most part i listened and enjoyed the music and didnt pay Much attention to anything#else. and like liam. i always liked him in the band days because to me he was the underdog. the underappreciated and probs less stanned one#out of all of them. and when youre a fan i do feel like a lot of us just wanted them all to be appreciated. idk. but anyways yeah i did feel#for him. due to him backgroud growing up. his talent. etc etc. even though he wasnt my fav. and even when he did something wrong my teenage#self still defended him like my life depended on it. (embarassing) anyways. his solo music while it was not my fav i still occasionally#enjoyed. its just over produced pop like it was fine and i found it fun. in terms of him as an actual person by this point in his career i#didnt pay attention to him or the others that much anymore#and like. yeah as of recently as more stuff came out about him being kinda weird and rude and abusive 🙃🙃🙃 that was kind of the final#straw for me! like in terms of me giving a fuck about him. if he eventually came around cool but i wasnt gonna wait around for it.#god this whole thing feels so dramatic but i need to get it oit or i Know i will not be at peace lmao anyways#so yeah come to hearing about his death which. i hear about because of trin lovell on twitter like. shsvshs. anyways my reaction was#disbelief and just... nothing? like i said in my brain i had just disregarded him honestly. and even now i still just feel speechless.#to summarise my feelings. fuck him for how he treated his ex and probably other women as well. but also. he was my boy. he'll always be a#part of me. and it feels weird that hes just. gone. he suffered a lot with addiction and pressures etc and its just. sad that hes gone now.#that he never got to get better. and he wont get the chance to. im sad for his family. and anyone else thats gonna be affected by this#im always gonna remember him.#and thats all i have to say. honestly part of me feels SO dramatic for even typing all this out but here we are.#if anyone has read this far and wants someone to talk to im more than happy. and also just wanna make clear that i am fine#le text post
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Mmmhh...
#(Basically rant on my last two posts)#I know I've said it before and sorry for coming off as annoying–#but I really wish we still had a central bsd blog on Tumblr like fy-bungoustraydogs or bsd-central or things of the kind.#I think now everyone rushes to post news first. And although there's merit to it in knowing news as soon as they happen‚#in the long run the death of this kind of central official content ***fan*** blogs is such a huge loss of fandom spaces‚#especially for the archiving purposes they solved. Especially today that T/witter and G/oogle have basically become unusable.#Literally. Literally. I've been doing official content archiving since I was 11#(because that's the very specific kind of mental illness I have)#and let me tell you that the quality of web search and especially reverse image search only got worse–#in a way that is very evident and noticeable. Which is crazy tbh and not how things should work.#If anyone would like to start a bsd-central kind of blog I'll be the first one to follow.#Actually if anyone actually wants to establish it feel free to contact me and I'll be more than happy to share the resources I have!!!!#It just needs to be something multi-modded for a series of reasons I won't get into right now#I just can't personally do it (not as main admin at least) because that would be modding my FIFTH active bsd blog–#and that's a little too much even for me.#On top of some ethical concerns I have regarding whether it'd be fair for me to mod a fandom central bsd blog–#when I feel like I can't genuinely share the same amount of love for the franchise other fans share#On top of. You know. Getting a degree eventually hopefully.#Then years after the blog has been solidly enstablished and aquired enough credibility it could even open a free donations found to invest–#in buying and scanning and releasing bsd content that hasn't been shared yet like the guidebooks or illustration books or everything else–#for everyone to see...#The dream. (Is realistically never going to happen) (Won't stop me from daydreaming about it every day)#((Still salty I couldn't afford the guidebooks only due to the shipment prices. I *would* have scanned and uploaded them.))#That was a long and idealistic rant. Kyotag out#Edit: *Modding my SIXTH bsd blog#Apparently I mod so many blogs I lost count of them
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Slightly concerned that chapter 2 of my critically acclaimed new fic might be a bit shit...
#dead boy detectives#not SUPER shit#but it's a v diff part of the story#and that slow build of chapter one isn't really present here#it's more meandering with lulls in the tension/stakes#and idk a bit formless#and I'm getting in my head about it a bit bc tbh it's longer than I intended#like it's gotten so big that I'm probs gonna up the chapter count from 3 to 4/5#and I'm like ok but does it need all this extra stuff or is it a rambling boring waste of time?#this is what happens to my head when I let a one-shot idea spin out lmao#like I know lots and lots of people (including me) are more than happy to read fic that's like#basically just character moments/interactions with no plot or slow/plodding plot#but i feel like the creepy tense ghost story vibe of chapter one might have given people expectations that the rest of the fic will be that#and i'm gonna be real with you. the ENTIRE purpose of this fic is so I can write One Scene in the last chapter#everything else including themes and motifs have grown out of that#and I have no idea if they're gonna hang together in the end#ugh i'm gonna have to finish/post c2 soon before i get REALLY in my head about it and bury it#i have one more section to write i think#and then an edit#if anyone who doesn't mind spoilers wants to read it and tell me if it's horribly boring please dm me lmao#(it's chapter 2 of Lonely Bones if that wasn't clear)#mr. bees speaks
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very excited to say that as of today, 10/19/24, i have been taking testoserone for a year!
1 year ago vs today
#testosterone#wild to me that my voice has changed this much#i also feel very silly doing the whole video thing but again im also very excited#and this really is more for me than it is anyone else tbh#which is why I'm posting it at midnight lmao
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well basically like raise your hand if you’ve ever been blocked by a close mutual you though you were actually friends with and not just fandom-mates because you expressed an emotion they didn’t like because apparently they only want to interact with people who watch the same media as them and when you didn’t anymore they stopped talking to you and the media you DID have in common they gave up on once they found something more popular and seeing as that thing happened to be your favorite thing you graciously let them have because you believed you were friends and they would treat it with care and love but they didn’t and it made you feel like they didn’t respect you or like you or think of you as a person but rather as a faceless entity who sometimes could make Posts about tv shows you have in common. despite the fact they know what your face looks like because they’ve seen it because you’ve gotten together on zoom and watched movies together like friends do but that doesn’t mean anything i guess if you try to delicately have a conversation about how you feel because they just immediately dismiss you and start talking to you like you’re coworkers in a polite email chain because you said you didn’t like their tv show. which was a fact they already knew but didn’t take seriously because they were apparently never viewing you as a person! or has that only happened to me.
#and i’m not trying to make a callout post and start drama this is just my blog where i talk about my life#and i wouldn’t start drama because i’m not stupid enough to think anyone would take my side because no one likes me more than this other#person i’m pretty sure. due to the everything about me that kinda sucks i guess#but more so to do with the fact that there is a very small number of people on here i actually feel like. friends with. and everyone else#just follows the fandom posting they like best. which is fine and i do that as well#but i would probably be devastated if someone else i thought i was friends with didn’t pick me. so i’m not saying anything#i mean you could ask. but lately i’ve felt very fleabag season 2 episode 1 opening scene dinner. so#(‘no one’s asked me a question in 45 minutes’)#anyway. yeah. awesome. ok#um and it should go without saying that if there’s a traitor in my midst (dramatic way of saying that. i’m not actually like. beefing)#don’t like. send this post to who i’m talking about and make shit awkward. you’d think that’s common sense but it’s not#when i was ousted from stranger things fandom for committing the heinous crime of not liking steve there was a lot of insane shit that#happened. which i do not care to repeat. who sends someone’s vaguepost to the person they were vaguing that’s such bad etiquette fr 🙄#and i can’t believe how nice i was about it to those people i should have killed them that shit was so stupid#you had to be there#and also this isn’t fandom drama i’m just sad. so it’s completely different#because the fandom drama example i just gave was pure pettiness and bitchiness tbh. i was 20 what do you want from her
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Beasties of Greenhollow soundtrack! Some tracks on this are from older projects like elphame but all of them have been reworked in some way. Most of them are entirely new. Enjoy!
#soundtrack#music#indiegamedev#Youtube#beasties of greenhollow#indiegame#chiptune#elphame#hey again gang. Another scream into the void#Things have been getting more interesting tbh#I'm starting therapy again. I have learned from this that my anxiety is in the very very high end.#And I guess the only thing that surprises me about that is that it's an abnormally high amount vs the average.#I've had more intrusive thoughts this week than in a long time. (I almost said ever but that was 2021 where they woke me up...)#It's mostly about my mistakes and ppl I've scared out of being in my life because of the actions based on my anxieties.#Like “if i could go back in time I could fix it”... girl you'd be going back in time like 100 times. At that point it's not fair lmao#I think I shouldn't talk about who I'm dating here anymore. Friends told me to stop seeing so many new people and I took that advice.#I'm exercising incredibly frequently; obsessively so. It really doesn't change much in my anxiety. I walk for like 3 hours a day.#My friend group is... difficult. One of us had a falling out with another and the dynamic is just so awkward for me now.#it just seems like everyone else has moved past it though but I still miss him. I don't think this can be reversed#we used to talk on my stream and play digimon cards n jackbox and d&d... But now they're only interested in d&d which I don't love#For god's sake I've published a game and moved to a nice new place. why aren't I happy hahahaha#work is no longer enjoyable since BoG was publised. our new project is in an iffy category but it's not my place to argue#I want to write music and animate but I have to do my hours for this new project before I can do anything like that...#I ended up siding with my current boss in that ethical dilemma I posted about and rn idk if that was the right decision.#Okay what can i talk about that's good? We moved to a nice place. I'm celebrating BoG's release with family tomorrow.#Graeme's playing Iconoclasts- one of my favourite games! He's also returning to work soon so it'll be less awkward to have a lady over#Thinking about good stuff going on just draws the mind to holidays I've had before. I treasure my memories!#Okay so I've complained for a long long time bc life doesn't feel great rn. But rest assured I already know this is 90% my fault hahaha#Oh another good thing that happened!!! My elestrals card was printed and ppl are really happy with it. I have a card in a real card game!!!#don't tell anyone but there's another one on the way. Anyway that will do for now. I'm sorry about my... self.
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it seems to me like eldest tries really hard to make it seem like arya has a lot of personality and complexity as a character and frankly it's not really working imho. like. there's a scene that really frustrates me. where we're told that she and eragon sit and talk about their families, their lives and whatnot, but that dialogue just. doesn't exist. how the hell am i supposed to see her as something other than a clear attempt from paolini to create "ideal woman who is so perfect and wonderful and yet will eventually fall for our protagonist"? give her some depth! make it make sense to me that eragon would be interested in her, aside from the fact that she's oh so beautiful. paolini makes him literally say to her that he cares about his friendship with her, but tbh i don't think any of us do either because their friendship has never been properly developed. most of the time it's eragon's inner monologue going "wow she's so pretty and wonderful and has such stealth and her figure and her hair and omg she'd never be with me :(" and her being mean to the dwarves or smth.
#fes rereads eldest#yea i'm sorry the way arya is written infuriates me#nasuada is allowed to be her own person as a character in a way that arya is not#and that's the tea#and tbh i kinda like that murtagh is all like 'oh she's just so clever and elegant' it feels like he's actually adding info#every time eragon starts praising arya on the other hand i'm a bit skeptical tbh#and i'm not the biggest murtagh and nasuada fan myself#i've accepted that's where we're going tho#but the whole arya thing... hopefully she'll get a bit more depth in brisingr... i think she did but i don't remember#she seems to me like the kinda character a teenage boy would write about as a 'fantasy' thing#oh....wait....hold on a minute....#i also just find the elves really pretentious and i can't really stand their holier-than-thou attitude#and arya has that all over#its clear to me paolini wanted to make the elves just wiser and more knowledgeable than anyone else#but he accidentally made them into self-righteous hypocrites#shit this post has turned into elf-slander#sorry :)#maybe i'll write a proper elf-slander post at some point#i think someone already wrote one that was absolutely wonderful and accurate but i can't really remembmer#anyway
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please say more about the angel+krester spec because you are one of the only people i trust with them <3
hello yes welcome to the only ship adjacent fic for them i will probably ever write <3
tbh a lot of it has come from our discussions of what the sort implications would be for a narrative in which krester's, erm, poor decision making skills? would lead him to have a more negative character arc overall. since this is a post anyone can read i do want to clarify that this is not me being a mean ol' ramiroángel shipper who just wants krester to be a jackass but actually me looking at his story in season one and being intrigued by what it could mean for him to get worse, in fact. i think krester's loneliness and anger are vastly underexplored topics in fandom, and i want to see a story in which he does have a much darker overall role in the narrative. (also watching the rain made me have a mighty need for more tragic villain roles played by lucas so)
and on the flip side, just in general i do think ángel would have more positive character growth if only because he's able to accept what krester literally struggles to accept in season one: someone offering him understanding and a chance to be vulnerable and loved. for ángel, his romantic relationship with ramiro offers that and we see him accept it. for krester, his sibling relationship with tove means she's offering him choice and a chance to get away from their mother's influence and he spits them back in her face. so what happens in a later season, where ángel's growth is more cemented but krester is still struggling to find that for a variety of reasons?
this fic is, essentially, a conversation between ángel and krester set in reality/2099 in a hypothetical season three context. there's a lot of background work im doing for their stories (and for the stories of ramiro and tove, who won't be in the fic but whose influence will be strongly felt) that actually won't end up in the text itself? because i really want to just give a snapshot of this particular version of 1899 that lives in my head in only this scene, where ángel and krester sort of confront their similarities and how they've both become different. it isn't shippy at all, though obviously the simulation stuff will be addressed and i do think there's going to be some... idk, i don't want to say confusion on krester's part over what he feels for ángel, but i do think it is sort of him mistaking that "we're mirror images of each other" bond for romantic attraction when it simply does not exist for either of them (and would not have been healthy had they tried to pursue it). it is very sort of ambiguous and vague, and the ending is extremely open at the moment as to what will happen next, but it's been very fun for me to sort of outline and work on a fic with a dynamic that ive really avoided writing so far (mostly out of disinterest and a preference for other dynamics) but yeah. this is what that is! and it is one of the three sort of Big Oneshots im planning on writing this year to sort of break out of just writing ramiroángel because while i will be writing ramiroángel forever, sometimes a guy's got to branch out into other things so!
ask me about my wips based on their title!
#this is a fic that will probably be posted a lot later this year than anything else im writing if only because like#im really working out how to balance the sort of negative character growth for krester without it coming across as me demonizing him?#which like tbh is something that is more the imaginary 1899 fandom in my head accusing me of that than anyone real but
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46 minute psychoanalytic russian interview with andrey? i’m so sat.
#its three years old which is a shame i feel like a lot has changed but its a good one#i think this is the same interviewer i saw in a video last week#.. unless there’s multiple female russian interviewers who andrey is constantly for lack of a better word rizzing up#i think its the same. well i love her anyways. shes so fun#anyways. yes andrey tell me about your slightly unhinged family dynamic. tell me about breaking your own wrist trying to close a door.#im so obsessed with his sister and mother. definitely more than he lets on about his mom tbh#but ‘we’re not trying to make her seem violent or anything’ and immediately cutting to her yelling at like 8 year old andrey#IM GONNA KILL YOU cracked me tf up#also his story about him and danya playing as 6 year olds oh my fucking god. they are exactly the same#‘ the match was so bad i started eating the clay i dont know how we didnt kill anyone’ sobs#‘the rallies were 10 minutes long and we were both crying and he was telling everyone to go to hell’ that may be 20 years ago#but literally nothing has changed. obsessed to say the least#i think there was something i had wanted to screenshot and post from this but idr. there were a lotta good parts !#video#i <3 native language interviews they are so much better than anything else#Youtube#tennis
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honestly sounds like an unwise choice of dog(young high energy likely due to breed temperament and lineage to to have a higher reactivity and distrust of strangers?) have in that environment and im glad hes apparently living with family friends now, hope that helps w the behavioral issues
#toy txt post#im shocked hes gotten 11 bites in tbh thats insane? if nothing else. it sounds like that environment was not great for him stresswise if hes#biting that often#i dont buy into that dogs always have good character judgement thing but i do think there is probably some overlap with#commanders vibe checking and the general temperament of your average secret service agent being a disasterous combo of#commander not digging their vibe and the energy they bring to interactions with him. ESPECIALLY now that he has such an extensive history of#bad interactions w agents that like. for sure affects how they approach interacting w him#and like. probably some overlap w the agents hes biting and the agents who might have some unhinged politics of their own#that doesnt mean hes Aware or that his general Judge Of Character should be taken at face value#hes just a breed that is gonna be be pretty distrustful of strangers who is constantly having strangers in his space#that are probably asserting themselves in his space and close to his ppl in ways he doesnt like but that is basically part of their job#which he doesnt understand that. all he sees is Some Random Guy with annoying vibes thats probably giving him sideeye and#exuding vibes of 'god i hope this stupid fucking dog that bites secret service agents doesnt bite me' and the dog that bites secret service#agents is like hey bro whats with the attitude. why are you so close to my ppl. why are you tensing up when im near you? are you gonna#go after me bro? not if i get you first. and the cycle continues. fuckin oof#11 times is insane but honestly. honestly. if i had a bunch of assholes following me around with a tense aggro energy and shit#i feel like moxie might start biting. shes not bitten anyone yet so far despite her high level of distrust towards strangers but like.#i think if their was someone with fuckin. Cop Vibes getting all up in the space of her people she might give it a go. idk#maybe not. shes mostly more confrontational towards other animals than to ppl. w ppl she cowers and trembles. but idk sometimes when we're#trying to convince her she doesnt need to have an anxiety attack about every new person she'll sometimes like sit on one of us and then get#a little growly when someone comes close not just cos shes scared but also cos shes being protective. but also its funny bc she is also like#trying to hide between our legs like a baby penguin. she is simultaneously trying to Protecc and Be Proteccted
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I’ve still only recevied one comment on my new fic................. even after I talked about it Heaps beforehand (not to like promote it or whatever I was just saying what was on my mind but. heaps of mutuals knew I was working on it and that it was coming hah.)
I am. really glad that I’m not in a more depressive mood right now or I’d be handling this a lot worse lmaooooo
#tbh it's not even just. working hard on something and not getting a response.#I do that heaps!!!!#i mean it weighed on me caring abt this one ship more than anyone else for so long#but that's not a big deal right now#it just. fucks with me A Lot#when I intellectually believe that a fic will do a certain amount of well#and then it just. doesn't. at all.#like how come I still keep getting this wrong#ugh I am OVERREACTING the comments might still be coming!!!!!#it's a long and heavy fic!!!!!!!!!!!!!#remember that one time I wrote a gen christmas fic and posted it like. dec 24th.a#and then wa sooooo upset that it took weeks for a comment lmfaooo#of course!!! everyone was busy!!!!!#why did I post it then???????#but in the time since then Ive gotten some really nice comments!!! its been a well appreciated fic!#idk id just like this one to be too because I thought it would and I trust my judgement little enough already lmaooo
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If u ever see me being suddenly deranged about smth, it's super likely that I've been deranged about it for a while but finally got past my cringe layer that makes me reflexively embarrassed about everything I like
#case in point; mephinite#tbh i dont think im at my full level of being publicly deranged about them#which is wild bc i think i might post about them more than anyone else??#idk it feels like that sometimes lol#i hope yall know that im not over exaggerating when i say that i think about them on a near daily basis#saying they plauge me is super descriptive tbh#erm anyway i should be asleep#gn#trash rambles
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