#this post is chaotic im so sorry

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Ok, this is mostly bc I realized we've only seen Sally being passive, but how is she able to hypothetically rip apart larger puppets limb from limb? (if the captions with Howdy hold water with other puppets)

(Slight Mutilation Warning Ahead: Puppet Edition)

they absolutely hold So Much water! it's a combination of a couple things!

a) Nightlight!Sally is really Strong. i'd liken to her to a chimp, as much as i hate them. despite being smaller than people, they're absurdly powerful. when it comes to Her, this comes from a mix of hysterical strength and something Else i've been pondering but don't want to solidify yet, so shh dont worry bout it. it's also much easier to tear fleece & cotton/stuffing than, uh, Biological materials.

b) none of the puppets are really prepared for violence? they've lived in an idyllic world where true, visceral violence likely hasn't even been a Thought in anyone's minds. like, you watch videos of people get attacked by like... raccoons or rats and they visibly Lose because they panic! they aren't prepared! they don't wanna fight! so the much smaller creature wins. They Don't Know How To Fight, Or Fight Back.

b.1) also, Nightlight!Sally is still... Sally. she's still their dear friend. i know that if a close friend attacked me, i'm not sure i'd be able to bring myself to do much other than defend/flee. i wouldn't wanna hurt them even if it meant protecting myself. hence why Wally avoids all confrontation with her & can't protect his friends from her. he can't hurt his neighbor.

b.2) there's also the shock factor. imagine you wake up from a pleasant dream to an absolute nightmare reality. Boom, automatically thrown way off your rhythm. then one of your close buddies looks Fuckin Weird, Are You Okay? and other crazy shit is happening! you're freaking out!! then your Close Friend Who's Off is suddenly slashing at you and BOOM, your arm's gone & your entire brain is scrambled from shock and fear and "?!?!?!?!?!". plus, i doubt the puppets know they're full of stuffing. seeing yourself sliced open and white fluff spilling out has gotta be just. so Unpleasant on principle.

c):

CLAWS BABEY! RIP TEAR AND SHRED! those sharp grippers are perfect for piercing and ripping! puppet fleece is Paper to her!

her fighting method is attack wildly until the threat stops making noise! it's very hard to defend oneself from it! imagine those cartoon bits where a cat attacks someone and its just a Flurry of Unbeatable Violence

[ssaseaprince]

Hannibal: Killing must feel good to God too, he does it all the time.

House: God's not real you dumb bitch

[foliagekat]

Pools (a sketch I may not finish)

[lesbiancarat]

my workplace is fucking insane bc yesterday I learned about gay office romance drama going on in my department and today the plant literally caught fire and there were floor to ceiling flames I need us to take a step back for a minute

[lovemkx]

Miles Kane with fans.

pictures from the past 3/4 days

[boxwinebaddie]

*drops back into this astral plane*

so, not to pull a ravenstan ( accidentally fake my own death bc i fucked up a lot ) but I’M ALIVE! i’m okay..ish.

i just keep getting precious about how i word my ask memes and it was taking too long for me to explain,

so long story short, here’s what u missed on NEEN:

( tw for me recklessly piloting my body, a little body horror like very little and also…jersey me-tsd? yikes? )

-my lead teacher was out, so i taught kindergarten for a like a whole week straight out in a million degree heat,

-i accidentally drew one girl a disney princess ( big mistake ) so naturally every other girl needed one, right?

-so now on top of pulling all nighters lesson planning, i was also squinting at extremely pixelated images of elsa

-popped a blood vessel in my eye, and did not sleep for twoo? days straight??? and when i say not a single hour

-and i won’t get into this last part because it lowkey trauamtized me but on like hour 52 or something of not sleeping, i had a jerseykyle level 10 hallucination that to this very moment i have to tell myself…was not real!

BUT ANYWAYS!!! HIIIII GUYS! I SEE YOUR ASKS!!! I WILL GET TO THEM I AM EXCITED ABOUT THEM!!! I’M SORRY, I WAS NOT WELL AND I COULD NOT ANSWER!

HYH! ( i also hope that…for me; lol! )

[kindred-spirit-93]

salutations of peace!

welcome to this blog dedicated to the many, many thoughts wondering in the expansive meadows of my inner mind. we have:

fandom rambles

OC galore and random lore dumps

deep life thoughts TM

excerpts of books ill never write

memes, awful puns, wordplay my beloved, rants about anything and everything

music and art and language appreciation

vivid descriptions of things that would put ebony dark'ness dementia raven way to shame

and so much more! my vision for this blog is essentially a scrapbook of sweet wrappers, weird poetry, dried flowers, inexplicable blood drops from untraceable source(s), cute little doodles, coffee stains, all tied together with glitter glue and skull washi tape ^-^

so feel free to sit back with some snacks and watch me as i take apart my mind thought by thought and have epiphanies and shit :)

*:･ﾟ✧ but before all that, a few things:

the name of this blog, Memento Vivere, is latin for remember to live. you may be familiar with its more morbid counterpart, Memento Mori, remember you must die. the reason for this choice of phrase is that due to reasons, i sometimes have to remind myself to stop and live, to really smell the roses, to appreciate my short existence on this spinning rock in space. so this blog will be my escape, my breath of fresh air, my cup of mint earl grey on a rainy january morning.

*:･ﾟ✧ a lil about me lol:

british jordanian gen z hijabi, dont have social anxiety; social anxiety has me lol, sleep deprived, herbal teas, psychiatry

medical student, full time and life long learner, salty snacks are better than sweet treats there i said it, strawberry milk supremacy

chaotic academia aesthetic, cats, existential (and assorted) crises

main @lemedstudent2021 and oc blog @bright-side-of-the-moon feel free to drop by for a chat here there and everywhere ;)

*:･ﾟ✧ general rules and guidelines:

this blog aims to be a safe space for anyone and everyone, leave your prejudices at the door or dont bother coming in :)

youre all welcome to share thoughts and ideas and suggestions, please keep it halal tho (so pg-13 and mild language). in the very least label accordingly so those yet with innocence stay safe

hate and bullying and disrespect in all forms will not be tolerated, bigots and brain dead buffoons will be blocked on sight

that said, for what remains of my sanity; zionists and anti-vaxxers DNI (i will come after you and your essential oils)

if i remember anything ill add it later, for now bring your marshmellows were making s'mores on the dumpsterfire that is life

art by the wonderful @sunshines-child ^-^

[thegreatyin]

i don't care if she's playable now btw i want arturia to be terra's most unredeemable girlboss in existence. i want her to be a blight to literally everyone around her. when offered the chance to get better i sincerely hope she gets 2 million times worse. i hope she dies i hope we both die hand in unlovable hand

[musingsbycaitlin]

if i must give up, then so must you: a wip intro

it's been about a year since i last posted on here, and even longer since i posted a wip update or intro, and i apologise for that. basically living away from home at uni made me ✨anxious✨ and ✨mentally ill✨ so the only writing i ever did was for assignments and my creative brain was turned off entirely. but! now that i'm back home and getting help, boy do i have a wip intro for you!

tw: gun violence, alcohol abuse, emotional abuse

disclaimer: this is my original work and plagiarism is never tolerated.

okay let's go:

genre: literary fiction

setting: 1800's, somewhere in the wild west

predicted word count: 50k

pov: first person, present tense, unnamed narrator

status: about 5k into the first draft

aesthetics: loading a rifle, wind whipping up skirts, dusty earth under feet, struggling to breathe, sleeping for a week, floral wallpaper, sunlit dust in the window, long-legged spider crawling along wooden floorboards, fingernails brushing arm hair, dogs barking in the distance, creaky gates, chewing tobacco floating in a whiskey glass, snuffed candles, laced lingerie hanging on the back of a chair, teeth touching

summary: it seems odd that her grandmother would lie, but our unnamed narrator is questioning her late grandmother's wisdom after a group of bandits raid her town. over night, she feels compelled to follow a lone cowboy she spies from the edge of her town, and finds herself going on a reflective journey across the wild west. From town to town, she wanders and meets people; she falls in love with someone she didn't expect; she learns what it means to be a woman without the burdens of her grandmother's lies. 'if i must give up' is a story about learning truths whilst growing up secluded, and reflecting on past traumas and the guilt that lingers there.

characters (the few main ones at least):

narrator: 20, (she/her), this barbie is down on her luck fr. she is just muddling her way through compulsive thoughts and actions and following this guy just because she can. a truly chaotic queen.

anne: 30, (she/her), the definition of gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss. she says, dont talk to me unless you're pretty, but if you're pretty she can't talk through the drool. somehow a simp. anne please explain yourself to me.

jonah: 30-ish, (he/him to a hellish extent), good god please sir just sit down. major gael vibes, let that sink in. this ken's job is emotionally manipulate. im done talking about this man.

brady: 46, (they/them), a cowboy just out for a good time, riding and riding in both connotations of the word iykyk. lets give a hand to the obligatory orville peck inspired character of the book. if tassles on cowboy hats where invented, they would be rocking it daily. oblivious yet knowledgeable, gruff yet softly spoken. they are my fave, i will take no further questions.

[mythcaels-a]

gonna finish my starters from this call first but I also want to post a starter call from my muses found on this page. if you don't specify who you'd like & how many starters you want, I'll spin the wheel of those muses & generate how many starters you'll get ( only between one to three of them this time ). Lengths will vary.

[florallychaotic]

I'm going to be real I'm so glad therapy has become normalized, I fucking hate that you are seen as egotistical for thinking you don't need it for whatever reason that may be.

[fenharel-archived]

saskia i am on my hands and knees begging for some ysabel info! what’s her backstory? what’s she like during the game? she’s so 🥰💖

[PERSONALITY]

Ysabel is a noble, Lolth Sworn Drow, living in Menzoberrazan and is a School of Divination Wizard

Shes an chaotic neutral ENTP, Gemini, 125 years old and 1.60m tall

Ysabel is creative and intelligent, mischievous and cunning. Some perceive her as quirky, eccentric - funny, confident with a giant ego, but also power hungry and selfish, sometimes cruel. She has always been full of ideas, always thinking of new and better ways to do things. She’s always been curious, more often than not you find her with her nose stuck in a book. Her childhood bedroom was exploding with books about fungi or tomes like “The past and present: a Scholars Guide to Divination”. 

She’s also rather extroverted and a social chameleon, excellent at manipulation and persuasion, something her mother often took advantage of, as she would often use her children like chess pieces in her political affairs.

[BACKSTORY]

The noble house of Do’Rahel is one of the 8 powerful houses in Menzoberranzan

Ysi has two older sisters (Yris, Yvory) and one younger brother (Ysmael, my warlock charlatan & very first D&D oc 😘)

Their mother (Yaelryn Do’Rahel) is a matron mother, a priestess of Lolth and a powerful and influential figure in Menzoberrazan’s affairs

As most intelligent people are prone to, Ysabel was more questioning of things like societal norms or rules and ideas than what was socially acceptable in the Cult of Lolth, something her mother often reminded her of through whipping. But her mother was also more progressive than some would believe - when her daughter showed more interest in the arcane than continuing her training as a cleric she encouraged it. She thought that having one of her daughters in the circle of the Sorcere was something that could be beneficial to her.

After a particularly nasty ambush on Ysabel (your regular weekend in the Underdark really) her mother assigned one of their warriors as her personal guard - a tiefling slave called Lucien (Side note but he’ll be romancing Shadowheart in a future playthrough 🤓)

Lucien was in his early twenties and enslaved for around 5 years at the time, he was passionate and charming, warm and strong. But he was also as cunning as he was kind. Ysabel liked him, and often would spend more time with him than was strictly necessary. He had Ysabel figured out quickly, and noticed that traits in her that might be weaknesses in her mothers eyes, could be his opportunity. That growing close to her could be his ticket to get free.

But things didn't necessarily work out for him at first as he would have thought - both of them fell in love.

He would tell her stories of his previous life, about his ideals and morals, about the world above. How children do not fear for their life where he is from, how parents love their children unconditionally, how he missed feeding the neighbors ducks before he would go to school. Ysi would laugh at him sometimes, call him weak and soft. But sometimes she would indulge in his stories. Catching herself thinking of them in bed before she go meditating. How strange it must be to live so truly carefree.

The influence Lucien had on her was undeniable. Small and meaningless at first maybe but there nonetheless. There were glimpses of true kindness in Ysabel only he got to see. Glimpses of love - real love, not just the craving for flesh or power he was accustomed to from other Drow. He saw that he had shaken her morals and beliefs, slightly perhaps, but shaken. So when she finally wanted to set him free out of her own volition, instead of running when his binding spell was broken he asked for her to come with him.

She helped him to stage his own death and broke his bonds and let him go, but she didn’t go with him. This would be a turning point in her life, something she regretted for the rest of her existence, something she kept thinking about for years on end.

For many years after, she buried herself in her tower. She never dared to think of why she said no, instead she sat in front of her mirror of memories, where she relived the time she had with Lucien. But in doing so, a part of herself, the past party in fact, was lost in it. Her present self was split in half. She was either overly good or overly evil, and she became known for being mad and for research and experiments that were even extreme by Drow standards. 

She was in this state for at least 60 years. She had short periods of time where she managed to stabilize herself through experiments, but it never worked for long. Nevertheless, she made a name for herself, she was an extremely powerful wizard, was considered one of the masters of Sorcere and had a place in their council. (Much to their dismay. Assassination attempts from her colleagues were a daily occurrence tbh.)

[GAME TIMELINE]

House Do’Rahel was infiltrated by Absolute cultists, leading to the almost death of her sisters Yris and Yvory, and the losing a handful of their staff members. Ysabel's mother also heard rumors of similar things happening in House Baenre and other houses all over the city. Sensing a bigger plot, instead of sending warbands like her colleagues, she only send Ysabel and a handful of warriors on a scouting mission. She was to gather as much information as possible. If she would see an opportunity beneficial to them - she should take it, and most importantly she was also to kill or capture any heretic or deserter of Lolth.

The trail they followed led them to the outskirts of Baldur’s Gate. She didn’t know it at the time but she was on her way to Moonrise Towers when she was abducted. When she woke up in the Nautiloid, the tadpole didn’t just strip her of her powers, but also stabilized her mind.

Being fully herself again after so long felt like having someone forcefully pushing a heart back into her. At the beginning of her journey she’s manipulative (she does a lot of the “heroic” options not because she thinks it’s the right thing to do, but because she thinks it’s a smarter way to uncover what is going on and/or because working with the Absolute would go against Lolth), she’s also selfish and a bit cruel, but a lot of things she does suddenly don’t feel the same to her anymore, and an top of that the problem with the tadpole - it forces her into introspection. 

At some point she realizes that her companions remind her of Lucien, and the time she had with him. Her development throughout the game mainly consists of her realizing that she rather wants love and friendship than pure ruthless power. She develops a consciousness, empathy. Something Lucien already built the groundwork of so many years ago. She realizes she was too much of a coward back then, that she couldn't let go of all that power and desert Lolth even though that's what she really wanted. Surrounded by her new friends, she doesn’t want to make the same mistake again. In her mind, she’ll never be truly good, much less a hero. But she doesn’t want to be what she used to be either. Seeing real friendship, love, experiencing it for herself, she realizes the only times she wasn't hollow was with Lucien - and now, with them. 

Her new friends act as mirrors to herself as well. She sees herself in Gale when he gets obsessed over the Crown, she sees herself in Astarion when he’s willing to kill all his former friends for power. And she sees herself in Lae’zel, Wyll & Shadowheart when it comes to the influence a God, Goddess or devil can have on you. They were all on the path she already walked on, and the guilt she is carrying with her over things she can’t change anymore is overwhelming, so she stops them all, helps them see what is truly important. 

About the reason she was in Baldur’s Gate in the first place, she isn’t honest with her companions at first, she has obviously her own agenda like everyone else in that camp. She was forced to explain herself by Wyll when she let True Soul Nere kill the Gnomes. Having a tadpole in her head made everything more personal of course, she starts going against the Absolute not in the name of Lolth or for her mother but for herself and her own beliefs in Act 2.

After the game, her mind is still hers. Going through so much change and admitting her biggest fears repaired herself, like a curse she casted and then lifted on herself. Also, she and Astarion guide the Vampire spawn in the Underdark for a while, and she also researches for ways to make Astarion walk in the sun again (and I like to headcanon that she succeeds :3)

If you want to take a peak, here is Ysabels pinterest 🥺, and since i mentioned Lucien, here is his'.

[new-haven-psych-ward]

Kamen Rider Geats episode 42 poorly summarized via memes with as little context as possible:

[trash-iest]

Tagged by my favourite @altmoon 🥰❤️ to post first 9 pictures from pinterest

Tagging: @frenchheartcookie @phuljhari @overthvnking @uzziii @sab-teraa @averagebrowndude @brokendreamsandpyramidschemes @thebreadslut @biryanipaiijepsenn @silenceismychoir @rang-rezaaaa

(Please ignore this post if you dont use pinterest. I was kinda lost while tagging so i just stuck with the close mutuals)

[bruciemilf]

New Chaotic Evil tumblr feature: see who unfollows you

[dandyshucks-moving]

organizing my photos folders so that all the Guz pictures are in one folder together and I can proper assess just how much brainrot I am experiencing SNDJSLSL