#this podcast is wrecking me emotionally

[mulchergeist]

I was not prepared for the end of part 27 ohmygod. sobs ARTHURRRRR NONONO🙁🙁🙁😭😭🙁😭😭😭🙁😭🙁💔💔🙁💔💔🙁😭😭😭🙁

[abessive-art]

Rameses: So I've changed my name 30 years ago, that you've proven. But a name is worth nothing more than a few pretty sounds and you and I both know it.

Juno: Maybe youre right Rameses. I just have a hard time trusting people who cant figure out what they want to call themselves.

[vinivan]

Finishing season 2! I'm crying so hard! I hate this!! :D!!!!

[constelationprize]

hi! i’d love if you’d answer a, u, and o for the ask game

A - Ships that you currently like a lot. (They don’t have to be OTPs because not everyone has OTPs.) Friendships, pairings, threesomes, etc. are allowed.

I am currently in Rhaenicent brainrot lockdown. (someone posted a full edit of them to the full 3:39 minutes of Good Luck Babe to YouTube and I'm being very mentally well about it). My beloved doomed yuri. I cannot wait until Alicent has to (redacted) (redacted) (redacted) Rhaenyra and then be miserable about it the rest of her life. I don't care if she's not on Dragonstone in the books life will find a way.

HOWEVER I have also been enjoying the armandaniel/Devil's Minion content we have gotten from the IWTV fandom post-finale. They are horrible. I do nothing but look at memes about them all day.

O - Choose a song at random. Which ship or character does it remind you of?

Instead of choosing I will just shuffle my downloaded songs and report back to you.

I got An Act of Kindness by Bastille and I'm gonna assign that to jeanee :)

U - Three favorite characters from three different fandoms, and why they’re your favorites.

This one is fun because I instantly forgot every media I've ever consumed.

So, uh.

Luke Castellan, Percy Jackson and the Olympians – Baby's first morally grey character. I just find him so fascinating as a foil to Percy and as a villain in and off himself. Unfortunately he is struck by the curse of being part of a middle grade franchise and so people often engage with his character in a very black-and-white way, and I hate how people use a single, ambiguous line in his literal last scene to moralize about him. ANYWAY. He did in fact do all that shit but he was Literally Right. So.

Adam Parrish, The Raven Cycle – he's truly the perfect character. He's a liar. He's traumatized. He refuses to accept help and be perceived and so tries to do everything himself, always resulting in making things 100% worse. Most of his problems could be solved by open communication and polyamory, and he refuses to do either. He's a real magician that does fake card readings for money. He does absolutely everything wrong and still manages to get everything he wants. He got rid of one of the villains by framing him for murder. He fully killed a guy. He's even bisexual. What's not to love?

Mallory Glass aka Sister Carpenter, The Silt Verses – Maybe my favorite podcast protagonist of all time. Attack dog of the faith. She's jaded and cynical and still gets emotionally attached to almost everyone she meets. The only thing she wants in life is a peaceful retirement from making horrible human sacrifices and two separate gods refuse to let her. We listen as she gets more and more tired of the world around her and the path the marginalization of her youth led her to take, and is still forced to keep going. Owner of the iconic line "Tell me more about your god, I wanna know whose house I wrecked", a batshit moment in a batshit episode that's been in my main blog bio for two years. I'm not ready to say goodbye to her this Thursday :(

[atopvisenyashill]

sidebar- listening to a podcast about this season of survivor w two former players (it was rob cesternino and cassidy clarke, if u watch survivor) and there’s a player on this season, venus, who’s been the outcast for a while, but last few weeks all her opps have walked out one by one and rob goes “i think she’s got kind of an arya stark arc going on” and before he could finish cassidy whispers into her mic “she’s no one” it was hilarious aksjd (he meant as in venus is going through her kill list and might get to the end alive) ANYWAYS-

some changes i’ve noticed

i feel like part of why the series stumbles is bc it doesn’t discuss lyanna as much as it should. having that added “we’ll talk about your mother when i return” scene right before robert & ned’s talk about jon snow’s mother And the targaryens was really good tho, narratively linking the two concepts.

HOWEVER i think like rhaegar & robert, d&d saw lyanna more as a puzzle than a person, but the whole point of lyanna is that she was a living breathing girl to ned and her death completely wrecks him in an irreparable way. so when they cut out his entire milk of the poppy dream sequence later on, it cuts out that she wasn’t just the answer to a riddle of “who was jon snow’s mother” but instead an integral part of the narrative whose absence defines the people ned and jon become. but i’m getting ahead of myself bc they haven’t actually changed anything here yet and the scene where ned and robert stop to talk is really good and more or less what happens in the book aksjdj.

i don't understand why they don't have catelyn thank summer for saving her and bran from the assassin. just another mind boggling decision and weird, unnecessary departure from cat's character

another unnecessary change is taking away ned’s fashionista tendencies smFh they don’t get nedcat at all

the way jaime is like oh ned is gonna be my bestie we’re gonna trade war stories we’re gonna flirt i’ll tell him about his brother’s gruesome death and he’ll be so grateful he’ll become MY best friend instead of robert’s and meanwhile ned is like, openly snarling the whole speech. the way ned’s mouth drops open at the GALL of jaime to say killing aerys felt like justice and jaime looks DEVASTATED and PERPLEXED that this man hates him so much when they’ve talked twice aksjdjd

okay first of all I DO IN FACT GET THE CHANGE of having bran say he had to have fallen whole robb insists he never falls, and we all know this scene lives forever in my mind but i also think it’s a) another weird departure from bran’s canon, very stubborn character and b) a PALE imitation of the talk in the dark between robb & bran where they say they’ll go on an adventure

that said, there’s something that Really fucks me up about the North having this culture wherein the sick and disabled are sent out in the winter to fight and die because they’re not like, worth feeding, but at the same time As A Disabled Person i guess finding it almost enticing to be given to the chance to like Die For A Reason ya know. you always have that out. And then here’s poor sweet Bran who it just never occurred to him that he would have to take that out and now it’s all he wants. anyways i’m crying ig

it’s the stubborn streak in him. he doesn’t want platitudes, he doesn’t want to be strong. his whole life has changed for the worse and he just needs to sit in it. it’s not fair and it all sucks and he’s just a kid!!!

the robert and barristan scene is another good one and it’s bc it plays into robert’s character, really elevates the elephant in the room of rhaenys & aegon, and the way barristan is just. disgusted. standing there consumed with loathing for everything he’s become, refusing to engage with being a driving force for why everything is this way. dragging jaime in to humiliate him in front of barristan, to humiliate barristan in front of jaime. the way barristan almost reaches out to jaime emotionally in a way he refuses to reach out to robert, but robert only gets angry and picks at them more.

“he said the same thing he’d been saying for hours. ‘burn them all.’” OH NOW ITS NOT SO FUN ANYMORE IS IT WISE GUY

gonna be honest i think the weapon talk between jorah and rakharo is one of the sexiest scenes in the show, listening to two dudes who are hit in REALLY different ways talk about their favorite ways of murdering people is really fun and hot to me also elyes gabel and amrita acharia were wasted on this show, they would have killed in later seasons smh

i don’t understand why they made the drogo storyline like a REAL TYPICAL sort of rape romance story. what was the point if they were just gonna be ~in love~ at the end anyway. such a weird choice.

do i love the change from “fear cuts deeper than swords” to “what do we say to the god of death”? like it’s fine. they should have kept both if they liked that line so much. the actor who plays syrio is so good tho he’s got such great chemistry with maisie, you really understand why syrio impacts her so much

that ending close up on ned’s trauma face is so good it’s such a shame they CUT THE DREAM SEQUENCE WHERE WE FINALLY UNDERSTAND WHY NED IS LOSING IT WATXGING ARYA GET FAKE STABBED IN THE GUT. ITS FINE. IM FINE.

general thoughts

“it’ll get easier” jorah is a useless binch just like aemon the dragonknight. what’s the point of your sword if you don’t kill your girl’s evil husband. go fall on it shithead.

i do love that jorah is like “ned is a little bitch for trying to behead me for slavery even tho it’s been illegal in westeros for like hundreds of years. but also maybe having a king that allows behavior like that is kinda crazy actually bc viserys is not right in the head. i’m not gonna reflect on that at all tho” iain glenn the actor that you are.

love the lannister breakfast scene. the way tyrion clearly knows but is pointedly talking around it. jaime thinks tyrion is the height of comedy and wants them to have a nice breakfast but cersei leaves haughtily halfway through even tho tommen & myrcella are having a good time. the Loaded Look jaime gives tyrion during the “life is full of possibilities” line, where he like,,,, Almost realizes Tyrion is saying something to him here emotionally about being disabled before he puts it aside to be self involved about the incest.

kit’s acting is always several degrees of magnitude better when he’s with other starklings. idk if he’s trying harder or if maisie sophie and isaac are so good they infect him with acting abilities.

there’s something fun about the cycles continuing bc joffrey gets drunk & belligerent like his father has a thousand times, but he doesn’t have half the skill or charm as his father and just gets his ass completely handed to him by a practical toddler with zero training. and he’s so embarrassed it helps snowball this situation into a war.

the kid who plays micah is real awkward. i'm not bullying i'm just saying.

“we all pray for prince joffrey’s full recovery” “pity you didn’t spare a prayer for the butcher’s boy” GET HIS ASS

have i mentioned how much i hate aiden’s acting. oh my god i’m not gonna get through this rewatch aksjsj

“war was easier than daughters” ned every emotion you’ve ever felt is harder to deal with than the war that’s why you’re so fucked in the head be so fucking fr with me rn lmao

septa mordane is a terrible guardian i think this can’t be understated

“she must take his side even when he is wrong” “but how could you let her marry someone like that?” GET HIS ASS

bran literally shivering with fear as nan talks my baby!!!!!!!!

“ah the starks. quick tempers. slow minds.” CAN WE SKIP THE EVIL VILLAIN MONOLOGUES TO THE CAMERA PLEASE

“i think we can outfox a ten year old” jaime you couldn’t even kill that ten year old correctly let’s walk before we run

nedcat giggling over ned throttling petyr and then making out in front of petyr’s establishment is amazing i’m literally so depressed right now i hope petyr cried into his pillow that night

the way both ned AND benjen just give the most ass goodbyes to jon for no good reason. are they TRYING to give him a complex oh my god

i think i’m on episode 4. once i get past season one i think it’ll be easier when the writing gets worse actually.

[probsnothawkeye]

I realize I need to use my person tumblr to be annoying about podcasts more so here is my review of the new Technomancy Project episode that I posted on twitter from a quiet room at work because I would not have been able to focus on anything else if I didn't post right then since this episode absolutely wrecked shop on my heart and I couldn't scream about it in office

Spoilers under the cut!

The Technomancy Project is the latest addition of the ever growing list of podcasts that made me cry at my desk at work

I was not emotionally prepared for this episode at all

Seriously going into it I was like haha medieval theme and teasers about zombies spooooky! And then what it ended up being was "Jason is immortal and has found his lost lover and has to kill his lost lover" and then I'm crying at my desk

Every memory of Crispin had me stopping everything I was doing to just stare blankly at my computer with my hand over my mouth like some kind of fainting Victorian woman

And then when Jason is talking to Crispin in the museum at the end??? More tears how dare you

Also I still love the dynamic between Jason, Eli, and Allie. They are a found family and besties who also kinda hate each other (affectionate) Allie and Eli are the people Jason would risk anything for and it makes me very emotional. Also the fact that they are willing to do anything to help Jason now!!! After season 1 you can really see how their friendship has grown and its incredible

Once I stopped crying at my desk, the Jason lore reveal had me like

I really really love the Technomancy Project and will be rotating this episode in my head for the rest of the day. Idk how I managed to get work done when this episode exists and is as glorious as it is, but I found a way I guess

[symbiotic-slime]

hey guys! quick update about my developing malevolent obsession:

I’m stopping listening to the podcast for now. it’s honestly emotionally wrecking me to listen to, and I need to step back from it. im gonna continue reading the fandom wiki summaries but I cannot continue with actually listening to it. I’m stopping here, at the end of s3.

this will have just been the weirdest 5 days of my life lmao

if you noticed a bunch of my malevolent posts disappearing, that’s why. consider this my goodbye to the malevolent fandom

[jerzwriter]

Hi, Elsa! Could you please answer: 🍲🍥 and🍡? I wish you a great week! 🌹

Hello Dear Dani! (From This List)

I've answered this one:

🍲 When did you start writing and why? and this one 🍡 Which of your fics was the most emotionally difficult to write? Here.

But... I did leave out WTD on the second question. Since it was an OH fandom friend asking, my head was just there. But in WTD land, A Mother's Journal has been excruciating at times. As we've discussed, being mothers ourselves and having traversed some minefields in recent years, a lot of the material hits close to home. Being a parent doesn't come with an instruction book for the best of times, never mind the worst. Then we find when we're struggling the most ourselves, but still want to protect our children and give them the best we can in every possible way... oofh... those are emotions that we just never prepare for. Writing this series, I could feel Florence's pain. Sometimes being a parent means having to make a decision when both decisions suck, and it means facing your darkest fears and still having to smile for the sake of your child. For all these reasons, this series will always be close to my heart, even though it's wrecked it at times. lol

Coming Up Blank was also very challenging to write at times. It was just the unfairness of it all. Now, granted, we are not battling zombies in real life (just people with the brain capacity of zombies, which isn't fun either 😊) but there was a lot to relate to and empathize with here. Coming of age stories always get me, but showing these children coming of age in such a tragic time was really difficult to do at times.

🍥 What's your favorite fic you've written?

This is SUCH a hard question, because these stories are our babies, and we love them for different reasons. I have a very long list of personal favorites on my masterlist - it's long - and it's probably not up to date. Sometimes I no longer consider a work a favorite, but it could be back again one day - it's all subjective.

But off the top of my head I'd have to say Delaying the Inevitable. It was a huge endeavor and really a labor of love. I adore the story because it's not a simple love triangle, it's about love in all forms. It's about the ghosts from the past that haunt us and hold us prisoner until we set ourselves free, and its about forgiveness, redemption, and finding happiness again. Nothing else I've written compares to it, so it's really in a class of it's own.

But there are others that are very special to me and I consider them favorites as well. Some more dramatic fare would be Forever (OH, Ethan/MC), ...and I needed you to know (OH, Tobias Carrick), and Things Unsaid (Tobias/Casey). All are about the downside of love, which is pain. I was listening to a podcast with the TLOU creators and he had a line I'll never forget. Once you chose to love in any way, it ensures 100% that you will experience heart wrenching pain. It's true, their is no escaping it, and even in the pain, there is beauty, and I love exploring that. (Which is why A Mother's Journal above is on this list too.)

But there are lighter/happier things that are amongst my favorites too. Rather than ramble longer, I'll put my Personal Favorites list here, but a quick glance and, yeah, I need to update it! lol

Thanks so much for the asks, Dani! And have a lovely week as well!

[waterfallofspace]

Finished T/MA

Spoilers for the Finale and what comes before under cut~ (as well as swearing, and rantings of a crazy person <3)

I am :D Never gonna be :D The same :D Uh so first things first, that was amazing. That podcast is amazing and I will be relistening to it.

Second things second: I'm so attached to so many of the characters oh no- oH NO-

And uh, third things third: WHAT THE FUCKING HECK??!?!??!! WHAT???? NO??? YOU CANT END IT LIKE THAT NO WHAT NO-

I will be reading a million hundred thousand posts about it now, both snz and non snz, because hECKING HECK that was amazing. I don't quite know what to put here bc I've just finished it and my mind is gone but quick summary of my thoughts incase anyone's curious:

JonMartin both gives me life and sucks it RAPIDLY away. I love them. I'm a sucker for a tragic love story and my god- ahhgnslkdanfgoil

Elias. I don't approve of Jonah, or heck, of Elias himself, but.... I can't lie... god I love that man... HIS VOICE OKAY- his mannerisms?? he's evil but he's CHARMING and- yeahhhh I fall for villains okay? Sue me <3

The whole world itself is SO insanely well designed. I loved listening to it and figuring out how all the pieces fit along with Jon and the others.

TIM!!! TIM MY BELOVED!!! I MISS HIM!!!

Daisy and Basira. Melanie and Georgie. I just loved the female representation in this, they were so badass truly.

THE LGBTQIA+ REPRESENTATION TOO!!! All the canon couples, not to mention the fact that they just? had characters be gay? without making a 'thing' outta it? 100/10 Um anyways this is a long post full of barely sensible nonsense, if anyone wants to talk about TMA please feel free to reach out because I will be dying over it for several days <3

Thank you for listening to the ramblings of an emotionally broken person, thank you to @onetrickponi for getting me INTO THIS!!! I had no idea what I was getting into and you know what? You did not lie, it broke me in every way there is and I could not be happier for it. <33

(And not that I think anyone significantly cares, but yes. I will be writing some absolute garbage for these beloveds. I don't know when, but it WILL be happening because I am Feeling Things and my boy Elias could use some wrecking <3)

[paperpiperpeeperpopper]

I've thought about it a bit more since I sent this ask (I was not coherent at all I was still reeling, gahdamn) and I definitely don't think Sisi is anyone we know, rather I feel like the yellow raincoat and Six's theme, (we hear Noone humming it in ep3 and she's... well, not Six.) to an extent, is a familiar thread that ties all of the aspects and different forms of media of the LN world together somehow without actually fastening characters into certain roles of "character = character" if that makes sense? Though I don't have any ideas as to why

My feelings about Noone are complicated, both staying with Otto and going to the Nowhere were bad options, and I'm NOT saying going to the nowhere was a lesser of two evils situation. Its literally a nightmare torture dimension.

I have however seen a few people shit-talking her for taking the Ferryman's bait, it's things like that I'm not okay with. These people are going "Ohhh Noone STUPID she took the BAD option, what is WRONG with her, could't she see she was making a bad choice?" She was manipulated, Otto was abusing her, she was likely terminally I'll, Ferryman was preying on these weak points, and it created a perfect storm to drag her under. BUT, as I like to say about all the kids people shit on for doing bad things, say it with me now: They are kids, they are traumatized, they aren't emotionally mature enough to consider the consequences of some choices, THEY ARE GOING TO MAKE BAD CHOICES.

Ahem, anyway I am sad she ended up in the nowhere, it's an awful, horrific, and grotesque place to be, especially for a child. I'm not even a 100% sure her being pulled over even "healed" her like she thought it would.

The acting was indeed INCREDIBLE, Noone's panic attack in ep4 was very well played and actually quite unsettling and I really felt for her, and Otto's steep decline from "her health must come first" to "I must know more" was like watching a car wreck, it was horrifying and gross but I couldn't look away.

All in all, an amazing podcast and addition to this world I think. I knew going in not to expect a happy ending, still I got heartbroken such is the way of LN :')

A summery of tson:

Shit's fucked

Seriously though I'm so normal. I'm a little sad Noone went to the nowhere, but I'm also happy for her...? She got away from Otto. I think that's what the nowhere does, targets children with *nowhere* to go and no support system (and in Noone's case she also had illnesses) and gives them a reprieve, but in turn they are pulled into a LITTERAL MONSTER WORLD.

I've seen a few people theorize that Cece = Six and Otto = Mono, but I don't really agree with that, first off, though Otto did react to the yellow raincoat, the raincoat was Rcg's first (I think it's more likely that Cece = rcg but I also want to keep my mind open and just process for a few days) and it just doesn't really fit in my mind...? And to everyone saying "bUt It would exPlaIn mOno's oBseSion wIth trAveling with Six and ReaChIng the tOwEer" I say ...No :)

I really liked the podcast itself, it was a little triggering because I have had experiences with therapists manipulating and using me, but I was able to look past it and enjoy it. The sound design was INCREDIBLE and I'm really hoping they release the theme on Spotify, and I really liked the writing

Aaaa idk my thoughts are all over the place

I totally agree with you on most of this! The trend of assigning specific characters to already pre-existing ones in particular really bothers me as of now -- characters can have parallels without being the same person, people! Just look at Six and the Lady!! I also don't think Sisi is anyone we know just yet.

I can't say I am happy for Noone, though. She got prayed on in one of her most vulnerable moments caused by an irresponsible and irrational adult, causing her to be pushed into the arms of danger. Unfortunately this happens way too often in the real world as well. Poor child. The Nowhere may have "healed" her, but make no mistake: it is not a place of good. Not at all. Considering the final noises we heard as she approached the "door" it seems that she may have travelled to the Maw, where the Ferryman usually takes children... and considering the things that happen in the Maw... I wonder if she's one of those many faceless children we see during Six and RKs adventure. :(

The actors did a perfect job. Noone is really adorable and Otto's breakdowns were incredibly effective, both their VAs are very skilled. I must also give props to Otto's Italian VA: he was perfect for the role and nailed the vibe to a tee.

[phatcatphergus]

This podcast is going to emotionally wreck me I already know

[the-antichrists-plus-one]

It’s quick, it’s easy, it’s free: letting a really good piece of storytelling absolutely destroy you

[im-the-king-of-the-ocean]

when your mind is a lot quieter than you expected it to be at this point

Jack Takano sucks

also just so many things that went so wrong that could have ended differently but didn’t

If someone had genuinely helped Sarah, if she hadn’t taken it out on Ben and Juno, just like so many ‘ifs’ and so many dominos fell and the result was just a giant mess

(I’m not saying Sarah was completely innocent, bc she’s certainly not)

it feels like there’s a road not taken that could have been happier, but it wasn’t.  Instead things were horrible, and now things just are, and sometimes that’s how life is.

also Jack just really sucks

I get the feeling that he knew who Juno was when he hired him, and then he just used him anyway

@misstrashchan I finished the Monster’s Reflection

[daricx]

that’s it, it’s over and i

don’t know how to handle it. not in the slightest. i love these characters so much and they’re... it’s done. and we won’t hear moonshine, hardwon, or beverly again

i cannot wait for campaign 2 but wow, i only found these guys six months ago but this campaign has absolutely changed me, taught me more about valuing things that are good and kind, and being good and kind for the sake of being good and kind

you don’t need to get anything in return. being good is just... the right thing to do. and i’ve never seen it encompassed so wholly as this group of characters

we are, we are, the youth of a nation...

[units214]

podcasts really said emo kid rights when death by dying and wooden overcoats were released within a day of each other

[cypresskey]

The audio drama community really be like “this podcast emotionally wrecked me, I have no tears left, I will never be the same again, these characters yeah they go through terrible shit and cant be happy for over a minute, i am in severe emotional turmoil, so go listen to this podcast 11/10 do recommend” and I love it