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themaribatpit · 3 years ago

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Jasonette July Day 9: Pixie

Written by: The Maribat Pit @jasonette-july-event

Prompt: Pixie

Rated: T

(By popular demand, a slight continuation of Game On @aespades, @certainmuffinbagelcalzone.)

A/n: Edits have been made because I noticed the paragraph errors AFTER posting this.

Marinette was really starting to miss the days of working with Chat Noir at that moment, and that was saying something. “Bugaboo” and “My Lady” were starting to feel more tolerable when she wasn’t being called that every second of the day. Being called “Pixie” regardless if she was Ladybug or Marinette, was really starting to get old, fast. For reasons that she could not understand, that’s what Jason insisted on calling her. Sure, she was a lot smaller compared to him, but that coupled with needing to hang back and let Red Hood and Arsenal deal out the heavier hits was starting to get on her nerves. She was just as experienced as them, she had a mentor just like they did, and had been saving lives for just as long as they had. Ever since she had joined them, she thought that she would be fighting alongside a team again. Now she was either supporting them or using her sewing skills to add improvements to their suits. She was in good hands, some might say hands that were a little too good. All this frustrated her to no end because she liked Jason, she would have thought that someone who had been a vigilante from a young age would understand what it felt like to be constantly underestimated.

“Unbelievable,” she snapped one night as she came home from another mission. She pulled off her pink flats and threw them across the room as she entered her apartment. She didn’t even get the chance to use her Miraculous, she was effectively closely guarded bait on that last mission. She slumped on the bed in frustration and Tikki hovered over to her, her antenna drooping in concern. “Some days I want to wipe that smile off of that stupid face, just to prove I can.” Marinette grumbled into her pillow. She didn’t hate Jason, she knew that there was some good in him. Roy was the more optimistic and cheerful of the duo, like Jason, he had also been mentored by a more experienced hero. Jason was a lot more reserved and cynical by comparison, though he wasn’t a complete Ice Prince like his brother Damian.

“Maybe it’s because they’ve been doing this for a little bit longer.” Tikki suggested, after Marinette complained about it for the umpteenth time.

“Batgirl and Black Bat are only a few years younger than me,” she reminded her, “and there’s no doubt that they could hold their own in a fight. No one gives them stupid nicknames, just shortened versions of their real names out of costume.” Tikki awkwardly scratched the back of her head. “I bet you that he barely remembers what my real name is.” Marinette was getting increasingly furious at the thought “it’s always ‘Pixie this’ and ‘Pixie that’. I know I’m shorter than him, but I have taken on giant robot dolls, literal monsters, and I once rode a dragon!” Marinette yelled.

Marinette throws a pillow at Tikki, only for it to phase through her. “What does he think I do as Ladybug? Create Christmas presents with my Lucky Charm?!”

At this very unfortunate moment Jason happened to return back to their apartment with Roy in tow. “What’s got you riled up, Pixie Pop?” Jason quipped after seeing the frustrated look on her face. This was the last straw for Marinette, “Stop calling me that! Does it please you to demean me? Does it bring you joy to fucking bully me day in and day out?” Jason and Roy take a step back from Marinette’s outburst. Marinette continues “I have kept Paris safe ever since I was 13, I didn’t have the World's Greatest Detective or a Robin Hood cosplayer helping me. It’s always you two off saving the day while I’m the distraction. Do I have to remind you that I’ve beaten Robin and Red Robin?”

“So have we, right Roy?” Jason says look backwards to Roy. Roy meanwhile was slowly walking backwards with his arms up in surrender.

“Don’t drag me into this please.” Roy pleaded.

Marinette continued her rant, “So why do you keep calling me Pixie Pop like I'm some pet or stuffed animal?” She storms up to Jason and pulls him down to her height by the collar.

Roy sensed the tension and wanted absolutely no part in making it worse, “You know what? I’m gonna go get us some shawarma.”

Jason looked over at Roy “Really, Roy?” A slight scowl made it clear he knew Roy was essentially leaving him to face Marinette’s wrath.

“All I know is that they are open at four in the morning and I’m hungry, so I’ll be right back.” Roy said, and he left the room. Just as he thought Roy was out of earshot, Jason heard sprinting down the hallway. Roy had abandoned him to face the burning blue fire in Marinette’s eyes.

Marinette let go of him, she didn’t need them, she had made that absolutely clear.

“I’m done, I don’t expect you to understand what it’s like to be underestimated all of the time.” she muttered harshly, “to always be kept at arm's length, because no one trusts you to do anything right.”

Marinette had no idea just how deep her words cut him, and Jason couldn’t really blame her. As far as she knew, compared to his brothers, he might as well just be ‘the one with the guns and leather jackets’. He hadn’t really told her about what had happened all those years ago, he didn’t even like to think about it himself. Roy was one of the few people who understood what he’d been through. It was true that both of them started out as sidekicks, maybe the red in their costumes helped them stand out from their mentor’s shadows. Their time as young crime fighters had left their scars. They were blindsided when they found someone who had been a heroine since she was 13, and took to it with the same determination they had when they were younger, more innocent, more naïve.

As Marinette flitted around the room, gathering her things, every nerve in Jason’s body was screaming at him to stop her. He reached out and grabbed her by the arm, trying not to think about just how small it felt around his hand. “Look, I’m sorry,” he began. What could he say to her? That he knew exactly what that felt like? That the last thing they wanted was for her to end up like them? That every hit they took in a fight was one that she wouldn’t have to, so that she wouldn’t turn out broken like they were? The problem was she didn’t see them as broken, she saw them treating her like glass. If she was put through the same ordeal, Jason had no idea what he would do. If she shattered just like they did, then in a way, they would have failed her. If she came out still whole, still brimming with light, then what did that say about them?

Marinette pulled her arm away, “I’ll show you, then you’ll be sorry” she told him bitterly. With her backpack in hand and shoes on her feet, she pushed past him and walked out the door.

Jason remains staring at the open door, regretting how he had treated her. He grew fond of her during their time together as ‘Red Arse Bug’. She had a cute face, cute voice and she wasn’t afraid to get her hands dirty. “Stupid, stupid” he says to himself, facepalm at each syllable. Even with the now hostile relationship with Marinette, he knew he had to follow her. He had to stop her from making the same mistakes he did, so that she would not become like him. He put on his helmet and left to search for clues as to where Marinette would go and what she would do.

Marinette wandered through Gotham city, unsure what to do now that she stormed out of the apartment she shared with Jason and Roy. She felt like everyone belittled her, Selena did, and now so did Jason. She needed to do something eye-catching, to prove to everyone that she didn’t need their help.

As she wanders past the Iceberg Lounge, she gets a spark of inspiration. If she could take down the Penguin single-handedly, nobody in Gotham would doubt her ever again. With unyielding determination she calls out “Spots On” and turns to Ladybug, ready to take on one of the cruelest crime lords in all of Gotham. Ladybug walks up to the front door and kicks it down, sending the door flying and knocking any unfortunate goons behind it. Penguin’s gang whipped out their guns, tire irons, pipes and anything that could count as a weapon and were now charging in to stop the intruder.

Marinette swings her yo-yo to wrap around one of the goon’s ankles, before swinging him around crashing him into several others. A guard points his rifle behind Ladybug, she spins around, sending her yo-yo towards the gun and pulling it from his hands. As the guards begin to group up together in an attempt to minimise the effectiveness of her yo-yo, Marinette looks up and begins to smirk. She flings her yo-yo upwards and hooks it onto a chandelier. She yanks it down, sending the chandelier crashing onto the unsuspecting guards.

Marinette dusts her hands and proceeds to walk through into the main hall. She proceeds to kick down that door too, she is then greeted by The Penguin surrounded by his gang. “I’m taking you down Cobblepot.” She shouts, swinging her yo-yo as if it was a lasso, preparing for a fight.

The Penguin stands up from the seat of his large chair. “What are all you idiots waiting for?” He shouts all around him. He points his umbrella at Ladybug, and begins shooting his umbrella gun. “Get her!” The penguin roars, at this cue every gangster charges at Ladybug.

Marinette gracefully dodges and weaves around Penguin’s army, knocking each one out one by one. Until only The Penguin remains, she wraps her yo-yo around his umbrella, easily disarming one of Gotham’s most wanted. She walks towards The Penguin, slowly unravelling her yo-yo in anticipation of tying him up and sending him to Arkham Asylum.

The Penguin takes out a little remote control from his suit pocket, “It's not over yet.” he snarls and pushes a button. At that moment the entire building shakes.

“Born on a Monday” a voice groaned, followed by another loud thud. “Christened on a Tuesday.” the same voice groaned. Then a giant hand shoots up from beneath the floor, “SOLOMON GRUNDY” roared the giant as it emerged from the floor.

Red Hood and Arsenal had been watching the fight from a careful distance outside the Iceberg Lounge. “Well, she’s managed to take on Penguins goons just fine,” Arsenal observed through the small pair of binoculars, “she’s certainly had plenty of time to get very creative with that yo-yo”.

Red Hood’s hand was still itching to reach for one of his pistols, ready to jump in at the first sign of trouble. “By the way, how was your shawarma?” he asked sarcastically.

Arsenal looked over at him, raising an eyebrow “Hey, I’m not the one who said the one thing that just made her angrier, you were on your own there.”

“Nice to know you had my back.” he grumbled.

“Oh I do in a fight, you just decided to be an ass and poke the angry girl with a stick.” Arsenal pointed out.

Their banter was interrupted by an earth shattering thud, following a loud groan “Born on a Monday.” At that moment their blood ran cold. Red Hood and Arsenal rushed towards the Iceberg Lounge. Both worried for Ladybug and aware of what comes after that dreadful nursery rhyme.

“What are you two doing here? I can handle this.” growled Ladybug as Red Hood and Arsenal arrived.

Before either Red Hood or Arsenal could answer, they were interrupted by Solomon Grundy smashing the ground where Ladybug was standing. Ladybug gracefully dodged the punch, grappling onto a ceiling lamp to swing towards Grundy with a kick.

The giant grabbed Ladybug while she was mid-air and threw her towards her partners. Red Hood catches her, holding her tightly as the two fly across the room. He shields her from the shock, taking the brunt of the impact as they crash into the wall.

Red Hood groans “You okay?” Ladybug looks up to see she was relatively unharmed, but Red Hood had taken the brunt of the throw. Concern visible on her face as she sees Red Hood’s damaged helmet, and the bruised and bloodied face beneath.

Their quiet moment together was interrupted by Arsenal's cries for help. Every arrow he had in his quiver wasn’t making a dent in Solomon Grundy. Ladybug decides to cast Lucky Charm in desperation, and swings her yo-yo up. The ladybugs converge to form...a polka-dotted stick of dynamite.

“Arsenal!” She called. “Tie this to the end of an arrow, Red Hood and I will keep it busy.” She tosses the dynamite to Arsenal and tells Red Hood to tie Grundy down.

Ladybug using her yo-yo grabs on to Solomon Grundy’s left arm while Red Hood uses his grappling hook to hold on to his right arm. Leaving Grundy exposed and immobile, giving Arsenal the opportunity for a clear unobstructed target.

Arsenal draws and aims the special Lucky Charm Explosive Arrow. The giant zombie growls “Arrow Boy no hurt Grundy.”

“Arrow Boy yes hurt Grundy” quipped Arsenal, before releasing the arrow causing a thunderous explosion into Solomon Grundy’s face. The giant slumps, Ladybug and Red Hood quickly release their hold and watch its body fall back into the hole in which it came from.

Solomon Grundy’s body lays motionless in the basement of the Iceberg Lounge as the three peer over the hole in the ground, “Let’s get outta here before the GCPD or worse, Batman arrive” Red Hood points to the front door, and the three of them leave the lounge to head back to their apartment.

As the three arrive home, they each find a nice comfortable spot to collapse onto. Jason claimed the sofa, slumped down Roy in the middle of the living room floor and Marinette sat at the dining table. “I vote for a week off.” groaned Roy.

“I second that motion” agreed Jason.

“I still have design work to do.” Marinette told them, not really looking at either of them at that moment. She was torn between appreciating their help, and frustrated that she hadn’t been able to handle the situation herself like she thought.

“Still that was one hell of a fight, and hey, you still managed to take on a squad of goons by yourself.” Roy said, “I’m so proud” he said dramatically pretending to wipe away a happy tear.

He nudged Jason in the leg, “um, yeah, good work” he said awkwardly, slightly lost in thought. Marinette smiled slightly, before turning her attention back to her little fairy friend perched on the table.

“So does this mean Red Arse Bug is back together?” Roy asked enthusiastically, Marinette wasn’t really paying attention.

The name still needed work, for one thing. For once Marinette felt like her powers were being used in harmony with their abilities, but she wasn’t sure if it was a feeling that she should get used to. Marinette could still vividly remember seeing Jason’s bruised and bloodied face beneath his helmet. Jason stood up and walked over to the fridge, looking for ice to dull the swelling on his face.

“Not with that name,” Jason grumbled, not entirely sure if Marinette was willing to stay after their argument. Someday, somehow, he would tell her the full story of what happened to him. Right now, that was a whole Pandora’s Box that he just wasn’t prepared to open. Nestled at the bottom of that box was hope, a hope that no one else would meet that same fate.

“...Lucky Shot?” Marinette suggested as she carried Tikki over to the sofa and sat down. Both Jason and Roy looked up, it made some sense, seeing as they both used projectiles and she had her lucky charms. Jason tentatively made his way back to the sofa, ice pack in hand.

“Sounds better than ‘Red Arse Bug’.” Jason remarked, as he sat back down.

“Well, let’s see if our little adventure made the news” Roy said, as he reached for the TV remote. Jason tuned out Vicki Vale’s voice as she reported on the fight that took place at the Iceberg Lounge.

As Roy slept at their feet, Jason knew if they were going to continue working together as a team, they couldn’t keep her in the dark any longer.

“Hey Marinette.” Jason speaks softly. Marinette's ears perk in surprise, hearing speak her name for the first time. “I’m sorry, for what I said and how we treated you. You’re right.” He gestures to the sleeping Roy on the floor, “Both of us started out as sidekicks, we both grew up in the shadows of Batman and Green Arrow. Both old men with impossibly high standards, everything we did was never enough.” Marinette listened intently as she shuffled closer to him on the sofa. “We’ve both been to hell and back, Marinette. Literally in my case.” he explained, Marinette glanced down at Tikki for a moment, as if silently asking if her magic was somehow involved in this. “But always remember, we have each other’s backs, just like The Three Musketeers.” Jason told her, Marinette giggles at his literary reference.

“Roy’s Porthos, you’re Aramis, I guess that makes me D’Artagnan.” Marinette chimes. Jason loved to see that hopeful smile on her face. What scared him the most was the idea that something or someone would try and take that away from her. They couldn’t keep treating her like glass, and they couldn’t keep treating her like a sidekick if they wanted to keep her from making their mistakes. They were all going to fight like hell to make sure this world didn’t break her the way it broke them. Marinette leaned in close and rested her head on his shoulder. He felt her calm even breathing, fanning his neck as she slept peacefully at his side.

#jasonette #jasonettejuly2021 #maribat #ml x dc

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curious-menace · 4 years ago

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Can I get hradcanons of what the ridlers would like for their S/Os to put in their lunchboxes ?

you surely can nonnie!

Arkham riddler

oh this is so sweet! he’s never had someone make a pack lunch for him before! its almost too nice to actually eat. he’s just going to stare at it for a while.

he likes lunches in a little brown paper bag. like the kind he never got at school. send him a lil wrapped sandwich and some snacks and an apple and he’ll literally be weeping tears of joy. his s/o is so sweet and thoughtful and he loves them so much

he’s showing off to his minions that his s/o made something for him. did YOU get a pack lunch made with love passing goon? no? well I DID. what a shame for you >:)

its a good thing someone is remembering food for him. if his s/o didnt send food he would absolutely forget to eat

Blacklight Riddler

he really likes leftovers! send him lil tupperware filled with the tasty things youve made for him and he’ll be happy as a bird with a french fry

he likes it when you wrap up cutlery for him. like he’s got some at his office but he always uses the same one, the one you send with the slightly bent fork prong. he might be a genius but he’s not sure how youve managed to fold the napkin like that. magic.

he likes fresh leftovers from the night before. or some lil light pasta or soup thing made that morning. if you send him something frozen, he’ll think youre mad at him.

one time you forgot or were sick and didnt send him anything and he actually called you at lunch like “ are you breaking up with me???” you had to calm him down and then go for lunch with him because he didnt think to bring himself anything.

BTAS Riddler

just make double whatever you’re having and he’ll eat that. he’s not fussy. he does like baked goods thought. like buns and freshmade bread

he will devour everything and anything you put in that lunchbox. make sure its only edible things. he has been in such a concentrated workflow he forgot to unwrap a burrito and got a mouthful of tinfoil .

dont bother putting cute notes in. he wont read them while he’s working and he might even eat them if he’s not paying attention.

he will literally only let you cook for him. he’s a germaphobe and he doesnt trust anyone else with his food prep. if you are for whatever reason, unable to do this for him, he would rather go hungry than eat something someone else touched.

Original Riddler

this is silly but he likes school lunches. like pb+j sandwiches, cheese strings and peperami snacks. he didnt get these when he was younger and now he’s relishing in having an s/o whos willing to indulge him.

he always keeps the lil notes you leave him. whether its a lipstick print or a reminder to get milk on the way home. he has every single one of them in a drawer in his desk and he’s running out of space.

he mostly wants snacks. he doesn't eat a lot but he eats all the time. like constant snacking to keep him going rather than sit down to an actual meal like a sensible human.

he cried real tears when you told him dunkaroo’s had been discontinued. you've been trying to make him some from scratch but its just not the same.

Telltale Riddler

he’s probably taken your lunch by mistake...or intentionally, knowing him.

he just wants a regular old sandwich or pita pocket or anything he can eat one handed while he works. nothing fancy, its only lunch. just something to keep him going .

he likes it when you sneak him protein bars and energy snacks. you both know its not good for him but he appreciates it because you know how much he likes to just keep working when he’s in a good flow.

he really likes it when you put a thermos of coffee in his backpack. he loves home made coffee and something about yours his 1000x better than anything from starbucks or cafe triste

Zero year riddler

ok he knows he’s asking quite a lot every day, especially considering getting the ingredients isnt easy but he likes bento boxes. something about the bright colours and variety just makes him happy.

he likes to have a different box every day. some times sushi sometimes sometimes pita and falafel sometimes pasta.if you give him something 2 days in a row he’ll get bored.

he likes to blog his boxes. he likes to show off what he’s got and takes a bunch of artsy photos of his lunch. doesnt mention he wasnt the one who made it mind you, the little credit hog.

please dont put soda or energy drinks in his lunch. he loves drinking it but he’s going to be bouncing off the damn walls and driving you insane. you giving him water for lunch is the only time he actually drinks something that isnt filled with sugar.

there you go nonnie! ive made myself hungry writing this so im going to go grab a snack haha

got something you wana talk about? send me an ask or a dm! im always game to talk about our favorite curious menace 💚💜

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myriahkamm · 4 years ago

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I live-blogged watching BvS and Justice League on FB earlier; here are my unedited thoughts. :P

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

I'm watching Batman V. Superman (because bad movie night I guess idk), and during the opening scene rehashing the Waynes' deaths (for what feels like the millionth time in cinematic history--seriously, y'all, we can be done with that for a while and definitely don't need a 5 minute slow-motion scene about it), when Thomas says Martha's name as they're dying, I burst out laughing because (i) I didn't remember that he said her name during this scene and (ii) is this supposed to be some kind of foreshadowing for the really dumb crux of the movie where Batman and Superman stop fighting because omg their moms have the same name? I literally can't stop laughing. This movie is such a joke. 🤣

Having the Robin costume in this film with absolutely no context is just stupidly pointless fanboy pandering. Anyone who actually gives a crap about Batman lore should realistically hate that.

Lex Luthor, one of the richest and most powerful men in the world, bitching about not having power is definitely on brand, but I am just super *not* a fan of the quirky, kind-of-nerdy-and-awkward Lex Luthor this film decided to go with. The hardcore businessman Lex Luthor from the 90s and 00s will always be the Lithor I like best. Y'know, the one based at least in part on Donald Trump. That one.

This Jesse Eisenberg version is way too much of a Mary Sue. Businessman *and* scientist *and* awkward nerd? Yeah, Jesse Eisenberg played Mark Zuckerberg, but I'm not sure Lex Luthor should be Mark Zuckerberg.

Ugh, I totally forgot about the Darkseid-foreshadowing dream that's never going to go anywhere because, let's be real, DC is never going to do a live-action film with Darkseid (and it would be awful even if they did). Also, Batman using guns in that dream is a thing I'll never be cool with. I don't care what kind of world he thinks he's living in in that dream; Batman has established principles and pretty much only goes against them in alternate universes.

Jesus, I forgot about the whole Flash-from-the-future scene, too. DC wrote a lot of checks we're never going to be able to cash in this film. Promising an Injustice-esque Superman-is-evil kind of storyline that they're never going to do anything with...why would they do that?

So in the dream, Darkseid-related stuff is going on (which, in Justice League, does sort of happen with Steppenwolf) and Superman says "she was everything to me, and you took her away from me." Then future-Flash says that "Lois is the key". Are they implying Batman has premonitions? Are they giving him a superpower? 🤣

Oh, that's right, they blew up the U.S. Capitol in this movie. 🤣 These scenes that are supposed to be really serious and filled with tension just keep making me laugh.

Why did they decide Batman needed to make a kryptonite spear? I mean, other than plot reasons so they could use it later against Doomsday. Batman uses projectiles and his fists; he rarely uses swords or spears or whatever.

Why did they decide Doomsday had to be created using a mixture of Kryptonian and Luthor's DNA? In the comics, Doomsday is an experimental clone based on ancient Kryptonian DNA. Why (in my opinion) make Doomsday so much more pathetic by adding human DNA into the mix? Freaking weird decision.

"Mm." What a weird quirk to add to Luthor's character. "Mm" every other sentence. What's that all about?

Luthor manipulating Batman into fighting Superman is...so unbelievable. Luthor manipulating Superman to hate Batman, waaaaay more believable. But no, that's not what they went with. They went with Luthor manipulating Batman for two years into wanting to fight Superman. Superman just randomly came to hate Batman on his own and only got manipulated into fighting him at the end. They could have just gone with hey, Batman's suspicious of everyone and would naturally be suspicious of a superpowered alien, especially with the whole setup they did at the beginning that coincided with stuff from Man of Steel. But nope. Nope, they went with the dumber plot.

Doesn't Luthor have way too much info about all these heroes' secret identities? Are we just pretending secret identities don't matter anymore? That's too 90s or something?

Why does the kryptonite spear make an "omg I'm a glowy thing" sound? 🤣

And now we're at the stupid Martha part that makes no sense because if you were about to die, you wouldn't say "save [mom's name]"; you would just say "save my mom!" 🤣

Batman would totally save Superman's mom even if their moms didn't have the same name. It's just such a stupid, stupid plot point and lends itself to endless mockery. 🤣

I *do* like this fight scene where Batman is making his way through the goons to get to Martha. The choreography is really good. Reminds me a lot of the Arkham video games.

Man, this Doomsday just...doesn't really work on a fundamental level. What makes comic Doomsday so powerful and terrifying is (i) it's not just a mindless monster, but is actually intelligent and can plan and strategize; (ii) iwas created through such extreme experimentation that it was repeatedly destroyed and then remade again over and over and over to give it endurance and formidably; (iii) and it's pretty much unstoppable from all that experimentation and uncontrollable because of its intelligence.

Also, what's with this explody thing Doomsday does in this film? A monster can be terrifying without being able to blow up a bunch of stuff. I'm not sure what the point of explody Doomsday is other than lazy writing.

The military hit it once and came to the conclusion that not only does it get more powerful "every time we hit it," but also that it's unkillable? Okay. More lazy writing.

And we're back to one of my biggest issues with Man of Steel: Superman just not giving a shit about collateral damage. Even if the island they're on is uninhabited, that doesn't exactly mean he should just be fine with blowing a bunch of shit up in the course of this fight. Sheesh.

How did Lois know they needed the spear again? She had no reason to go underwater to try to get it. This whole "let's make Lois useless time and again so Superman can save her" thing is really annoying.

Superman's "death" scene carries so little weight if you know (like pretty much everyone should have known, let's be real) that he's not really dead. Like, sure, for the characters it means something because they don't know he'll be back, but for the audience? At least for me, it doesn't make me feel a whole lot.

So all the soldiers at Superman's funeral--do they know they're carrying an empty casket? Just curious.

The dirt rising off the casket at the end for a split second is soooooo dumb. For anyone naive enough to think he *is* really dead, just let them think it. Just let that be a thing. Come on. (Also considering that he doesn’t just come back on his own; it takes a charge from a Mother Box in Justice League for him to come back. That makes this end scene a lie, too.)

Ok, BvS is done. Need another drink and a snack, then I'll move on to Justice League. 😅

Justice League:

Haha, obvious Superman facial CGI right off the bat, omg, I forgot how horribly obvious it is. 🤣

Also forgot that we're starting off with parademons right away. Sheesh.

Do all of Snyder's films have to have gratuitous slow-motion scenes at the beginning? Ugh, dude.

Everyone just throwing Bruce Wayne's name around in relation to Batman all the time. Secret identities are dead, y'all. No superhero can have a real life, I guess.

Ugh, I forgot this film pushes Batman/Wonder Woman pretty hard. 🙄

"It's cool if I show a bunch of Amazons with their midriffs showing as long as they have visible ab muscles, right?" Idk, Snyder, is that how armor realistically works? 🙄 Also, is it necessary for them to have lipstick on? That doesn't even exist on Themyscira, ffs.

The multiple (as I remember; only one so far) innuendo-based jokes really bring this film down, imo. "Clark said you were the thirstier woman he'd ever met." Really? Ugh. 🙄

The plot of this film is so LOTR. Amazons, Atlanteans, and Men all get Mother Boxes, sort of like the various rings of power. There's plenty you can pull from comics, y'all. You don't need to pull from other stuff.

Flash as comic relief I'm okay with. I'm not sure how I feel about *this* Flash's comic relief. I'm not a huge fan of the writing.

Break time because Je'von wants to go out on the balcony lol. 😅

And we're back. So can Steppenwolf breathe underwater? Is that a thing?

I guess it's supposed to be super funny that everyone disappears except the fastest one of them? Sigh. The writing in this film is just so awful.

Cyborg's CGI also isn't great. I really wanted more for Cyborg because he's awesome. Sigh.

Snyder must have loved being able to do stuff with Flash. All the slo-mo he could want.

I'm not a fan of neurotic Flash, afraid of pretty much everything. He can be funny in so many better ways, but instead let's just have him be afraid of everything and make sexual jokes every now and then. 🙄

"Let's keep having Cyborg wear sweatpants and a hoodie so we don't have to spend so much on CGI. It totally won't look ridiculous." 🤣

Batman making the argument to use technology he doesn't understand to try to bring Superman back from the dead is just so out of character it's not even funny. First of all, Superman didn't need technology to come back in the comics (whether or not his "resurrection" was silly is irrelevant). Secondly, Batman literally has an enemy (Ra's al Ghul) who resurrects himself on the regular, and Batman (i) knows it's a bad idea because it messes with Ra's's sanity and (b) would never consider using the Lazarus Pit even though he has a relative understanding of how it works. This film just literally disregards established character traits in favor of it's stupid-as-hell plot. Ugh.

Superman is vulnerable to magic, idiot writers. He shouldn't be able to fight Wonder Woman's lasso. Uuughhh. Have any of the writers of this movie ever actually read any Justice League comics? 🤦‍♀️

Well, those cops definitely know Superman's name now. Since you all keep saying it in front of them.

Superman hasn't even been gone for that long (seemingly; I mean, it's hard to tell, but S.T.A.R. Labs is still doing research on the Kryptonian ship in the same genersl area as in BvS, so idk), so all this talk about what he does or doesn't remember seems...weird.

Why not wait until you defeat Steppenwolf to let your mom know you're back, Superman? For all you know, you could die again. Wouldn't that just be harder on her after seeing you back?

Why was the lasso just sitting on the Batmobile instead of with Wonder Woman? Plot so that Aquaman could say some *super funny things*. 🙄 That's not even how the lasso works, you dumb writers. Someone has to direct another bound by it to speak the truth. Seriously, do some research. Ugh. It's not that hard.

"So your plan is dying? You really are out of your mind." "I'm not the one who brought a pitchfork." See, the writers prove that they can be actually funny if they try. *If* they try.

The "everyone trying their best to hold off the big bad until Goku gets there" vibe is super strong in this movie. 😑

Part of the reason the Justice League is a thing is because no one hero can do it alone. That means it all shouldn't be riding on Superman's shoulders. If you actually know how to write the Justice League, that is.

Don't know how I feel about everyone getting perks due to nepotism now that they know Bruce Wayne...must be nice to be buddies with the richest man in the world. 😒

The Flash vs Superman race at the end is more pandering. Ugh. It would be better if Flash was less pathetic as a character in this film. Super awkward is just not very funny, y'all. Write actual jokes instead.

Okay, that's over. What a trip. Both those movies are still pretty much garbage. 🤣 The question is, will I ever watch Man of Steel again? Probably not; I hated Man of Steel more than both those movies, actually. Wrote a 3-page rant about how awful it was after seeing it in theaters originally. $3 was still way too much money to spend on that crap. 😅

Oh, side note for the after credits scene: will they ever actually go anywhere with that? They might do an okay job with a Justice League vs. Legion of Doom (or Injustice Society or whatever villain team incarnation they would decide to go with) film. That might not suck.

#myri's thoughts #live blogging (sort of)#Batman v Superman #justice league #dccu #omg the awfulness is just wonderful #if you read carefully you can tell when i start getting drunk lol #WW is the only real saving grace in either of these movies

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shesquiinnsane-a2 · 4 years ago

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❖ PRETTY KITTY 『 @purrsuade 』

HARLEY AND KITTY. Since Selina had been spending more and more time with Batman , Harley had been spending less and less time with the Joker. It was a break that needed to happen , but more alone than ever in Gotham she had even opted to spend some of her time away from the city. That had been fine , and she had friends there but it was no Gotham City. There were no distinct Gotham smells , like dried blood , or sewer rats , and other smells that simply reminded her of the city she had called home for so long. With so many bad memories , Harley’s attachment to the city may have seemed odd to most but this city always had a way of dragging people back in.

On the streets on her own terms it wasn’t long before news of her return murmured throughout the Gotham underworld. She expected one of her first encounters to be Joker , wanting her head on a stick , but instead two goons were just after information. Knocking them down quickly with a few whacks of her bat it was clear this Harley hit differently. A new demeanour that had less time for bad guys. Not that it made her good , that was unattainable for her but it was a breath of fresh air on Gotham’s streets. The head of her bat lingered dangerously close to the goon's face. ❝ If he wanted me back he’d have come himself , but he’s too riled up in the Bats or some other freak to notice. I ain’t his girl , I ain’t ya toy and I surely ain’t here to play his fuckin’ game!! ❞

She turned to walk away , not knowing if anyone had seen the incident from the rooftops , although there always was someone lingering in Gotham , keeping an eye on everything. Maybe it was worth taking a visit to see Pamela , or even find Selina , but surely that meant finding the Batman too. Harley wasn’t sure if that was a good idea , not wanting to be sent back to Arkham for nothing. There was one way to lure a cat out into the night though and with a giggle, Harley set her plan into motion.

Heading to the Gotham Animal Rescue Center , Harley found herself the perfect little kitten, brown like her dachshund Nathan, as all the black cats had already seemingly been rehomed. Surely Selina would notice when ❛ Dr. Harleen Quinzel ❜ purchased her own kitten to adopt to an address that was notably Harley’s old hideout that had been abandoned since she left the city. She hoped Selina kept an eye on the adoption records , and maybe her presence in town wouldn’t be seen as a bad thing as Harley headed back to her old apartment and arm full of cat food and waited for her friend to meet her new fluffy feline.

#WRITTEN REPLIES.{one draft down; vroom vroom}#W; REBIRTH.{bubblegum blonde; sweet not stupid}#V; JOKER WAR.{when jokers need punchlines; things are less harlarious}#QUEUED.{awaiting escape; harleen the (q)ueen}

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arthuronfleck · 5 years ago

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Will the Real Joker Please Stand Up? Part II: Imitation Game

((followup to this.))

warning(s): this chapter contains violence, so please don’t read if you’re sensitive to that!

“Arthur,” The man’s voice held no room for pleasantries. “What kind of person were you before the world taught you it was worth fearing?”

A walking thesis; that’s what he became since stepping foot into Arkham. Arthur had long lost any desire to remember the names of the white coats that came through one after the other, asking the same questions with the same incomprehensible words. Almost as if they’d forgotten how to speak to a person; or maybe it was Arthur who’d fallen out of personhood. All of them felt the same. Not this one.

The lanky man was so bold as to not fashion a coat. His black jumper was nothing to excite Arthur’s memory, and his dark hair, dark eyed appearance paired with bland features in just such a way that the only thing that stood out were weaknesses. Had it been only a few months prior, the man’s nose would’ve already been broken and Arthur would’ve been lunging for the nearest window if he hadn’t decided on an unguarded door. These sessions never ended well, but running made them worse. Arthur’s fingers dug into his white trousers while the other held tightly onto the only reason he hadn’t been dragged into this, bashing his head on any surface he could: nicotine. This one let him puff like a chimney.

Arthur’s lips curved into a sweet smile as he studied the metal table. He brought the cigarette to his lips once more, taking a lengthy drag before exhaling a smooth breath of smoke. His expression flickered to disappointment when he flicked the ashes to reveal the cigarette neared its butt, and he had no more left.

“Fear.” Arthur let out a deflated laugh once more releasing himself from his predicament. It felt like dreaming. He couldn’t conjure anything fantastical, and nothing pretty ever made it past the cinderblock, but he could find a crevice in his mind to hide from the noise.

“You disagree with my conclusion, Arthur?”

“What do you fear, doc?” Arthur snapped back, rising from his self-imposed cage so quickly it seemed voluntary. He tossed the cigarette butt onto the dirtied tile. “I know. You’re thinking,” He let out a small, stifled laugh. “I’m going to get up and you’ll learn why none of you want to be anywhere near me.”

“I didn’t take you for a tough guy.” The doctor retorted, unflinching.

“I’m not,” Green eyes met the dark pair looking back, defeat swelling in his tone. “I just have nothing to lose.”

“Everyone fears something, Arthur, regardless of their predicament. It can begin small. Anxieties, really. Things like sex, swimming, flying- everyone encounters these things and statistically they’re bound to fear at least one.”

“Can’t fear what I never tried.”

“That’s the crux of fear, isn’t it? The unknown?”

Arthur stomped on the fallen cigarette, smearing ash across the tile. He didn’t answer, nor did he move to assault the man- the most magnanimous course of action he was capable of.

“However, I don’t believe your case is as simple as not knowing. Your fear metastasized beyond mundane anxiety, or even a complex phobia. It transcended any physical process- I’ve always believed the power of the mind is far greater than that of the body.” The doctor pushed his glasses further up the bridge of his nose, taking a collective breath. “Whether it was because of what happened in your childhood, or something rooted in your day-to-day living, your mind couldn’t reconcile that fear. It splintered you into two separate entities. The Arthur Fleck I see now,” He cast a shamelessly judgement glare. “Is one-half. The half that learned to be afraid. Like one of Pavlov’s dogs, any confrontation in your life set off a fear response.”

Arthur cocked a brow.

“You felt powerless in your own life. To some extent, you were no different than any other loser struggling to make something of himself with no prospects to build from. There was no fight in you. Your flight had failed and every day you were in freefall; however, you did something miraculous. You fought midair. Halfway down it seemed that your body’s fight-or-flight response switched course. To some extent the death of your mother might’ve hastened your downfall-”

“Downfall.” Arthur repeated with a half-laugh.

“-you’re here, Arthur. That you’ve fallen isn’t up for debate. What’s remarkable is how many you managed to pull down with you, all because your mind couldn’t cope with its own fear. How many Arthur Flecks are there in the world? How many others are consumed by fear exactly the way you were?”

“That brings me back to my original question,” The doctor began to flip through a stained manila folder. “What kind of person were you before the world taught you it was worth fearing?”

Arthur shrugged. “Nobody.”

***

“-as one of Gotham’s most violent years comes to a close, citizens are embracing slow news days this holiday season. But officials are saying to stay frosty as the anniversary-”

The radio cut off abruptly as the van came to a screeching halt. Arthur had gotten into the habit of not knowing where he was and not asking questions, if only because the answer never made any sense. This new world was simultaneously dreary and overwhelming. He closed his eyes and saw white cinderblock, as if his mind scrambled in vain to retreat itself. Despite it all, he couldn’t tell if this would be a dream or a nightmare. He moved himself with moderate freedom, and before departing what appeared to be a condemned warehouse, his captors freed him from the white jumpsuit; he now fashioned a less menacing albeit less clean navy colored hoodie beneath a beige coat, paired with worn trousers and dress shoes a few walks away from developing holes. When he took a hesitant move to wipe them, something dusty rubbed off on his finger to reveal faded leather beneath.

Arthur’s attention turned to the figure sat directly adjacent to him. Undoubtedly they dressed better, in a well-tailored suit that clashed with the cartoonish colors of the clown mask concealing their features. Arthur didn’t care for it; its mouth contorted into a toothy grimace while the eyes comprised of two large burgundy rectangles. Two puffs of stupid looking blue hair protruded from both sides directly above the ear, setting something off inside of Arthur. Something about it seemed like nails on a chalkboard to his eyes. It took itself too seriously, in a way that inspired nervous laughter. The figure noticed his stare, tilting their head as if to draw attention to the gun placed across their lap.

He looked away.

The figures to either side were no comfort, one a burly beast of a clown while the other was smaller than Arthur that more than made up for their lack of height with one of the biggest guns Arthur encountered yet, and something shiny resting in a holster by their side. His hands were freed from cuffs, and though the raw imprints served as a reminder, the clowns packing heat seemed like a better incentive to behave than anything.

Arthur’s attention shifted to the front of the van where he could see two silhouettes. One was more recognizable than anything since Arkham, with his hunched posture and grotesque features. His eyes traveled from the smooth purple velvet of the so-called Joker’s suit to the figure sitting beside him, another masked figure Arthur assumed to be a clown as only the red tip of the nose was clearly visible. A loud knock against the partition marked the end of Arthur’s exploration, as the figure adjacent to him sprung up and swung the van doors open.

When the hulking clown to the right of Arthur nudged him with the business end of his gun, he stood and stumbled into a covered garage. The area seemed dimly lit- like the rest of the city to this point- however he could see countless clusters of light in the distance. Part of him wanted to run, to throw himself over the concrete wall where he could see the lively lights up close. He knew he wouldn’t make it far enough, but he didn’t mind that either.

“You ready to go shopping, Arthur?” The largest goon laughed as the smaller one shoved him in the back with the barrel of his gun.

“Can’t believe he clipped a guy on TV,” The smaller one spat, his voice somewhat muffled by the mask. “He’s such a pussy.”

Arthur’s breath first gathered in something like fear, until it turned bitter. Something stirred inside him; he felt sick, but kept it to himself. Their references were lost on him, and whatever he could recognize felt more like a dream than a memory. It was just far enough so that he knew that it happened, but not how it felt or how it looked. Even his memories lost color. His brows furrowed as his feet stayed planted on the ground until he was shoved once more.

He turned his head to watch the driver’s side as they passed, seeing the Joker stick something into the inner pocket of his coat. Before he could look away the two shared a glance, and the toothy smile that came Arthur’s way did less to put him at ease than the ugliest look ever could. The passenger seat door closed on the other side, but Arthur’s gaze couldn’t be averted.

The Joker approached him in what seemed to be his usual grotesquely confident stance, and despite the very public arena he seemed to have no problem standing around with a host of weapons on full display. Arthur did the worrying for him, until a cold glove collided with his cheek.

“Your first night out of the cuckoo’s nest, old boy. It’s time to celebrate! I picked the best spot in Gotham.” The Joker’s laugh sounded more like a snarl, something that would’ve been an unthinkably kind gesture turned sinister with only a smile. They shared a stare until the Joker yanked his hand away, looking at one of the goons behind Arthur. “Which one are you?”

“I’m Cooper.” The small one’s tone softened when he spoke to his employer.

“Right. Escort our friend Arthur here and make sure he finds exactly what we’re looking for. Make sure it’s,” He inhaled sharply. “Red.”

“Sure thing, boss.”

“And you, Rocky-”

“It’s Rocco.” The large one interjected.

“Rocky.” The Joker corrected venomously. “Go help, ah,” He gestured at the large glass doors, glistening yellow from its contents. “Secure capital.”

As the Joker moved to make his way the direction opposite the store, he stopped and turned on his heels. “One more thing. If our boy tries to run, break his legs. If he tries to fight, shoot him. Oh, but if you do kill him,” The Joker gave a reassuring smile. “Then I kill you.”

“Yessir.” Cooper tried to stifle a laugh before he shoved Arthur once more. “Alright, let’s go shopping.”

***

Arthur walked into stillness. He digested the scene as long as he could, feeling like he’d stepped into a television rather than another segment of his unending nightmare. It was a splendor unlike anything Arthur had ever known, evident despite the haze of his memories. He looked up to the huge chandelier, watching every tear-shaped piece of glass catch the light. When he inhaled, he could smell cinnamon and pine. Everything was made of marble, from the garland-wrapped pillars that seemed as tall as Arkham itself to the seemingly unending staircase, to the counter top that held countless trinkets and jewelry in glass casing beneath. The glistening finery caught his eye at first, if only because he’d just never seen anything like it. He nearly gravitated towards it, until another step forward revealed a slowly swelling pool of crimson and a dark figure crouched over it, eagerly removing heaps of jewelry from the display.

Then he noticed the eyes. Countless pairs staring at him from makeshift hiding places, shooting looks worse than disgust. His chest tightened as he began to look more carefully and the horrific reality of the stillness took hold. Above all else, anger rose to the surface as their wordless stares evoked something he couldn’t recall. He felt it countless times, but he strained himself to remember when. With the cold barrell pressed against his back, he didn’t have much time to think about anything. They walked to total silence, with ambient music playing in the distance. As they neared the men’s section, Arthur saw a middle aged man duck behind a clothing rack while an older woman crawled behind a register.

“What’s your name?” Cooper shouted at woman, gun still pointed to Arthur’s back.

Silence answered him.

“I said,” Moving the gun towards the woman as she froze on all fours, Cooper tilted his head. “What the fuck is your name?”

“Mary. My name is Mary!” She cried, unable to raise her head.

“Okay, Mary. My friend here needs to get cleaned up. He needs a nice suit, red, in a size- ah, tall. Our budget- well,” He shook his gun at her. “Won’t be an issue.”

“I-I don’t know if we have any-”

“No fuckin’ red suits? It’s almost Christmas.” He gestured the gun towards a white door by the corner. “Check in there. There’s gotta be-”

Arthur flinched at the loud bang, the silence that followed, and the sensation of something wet splattering against his face. He froze, as if all at once confronted with something heavier than the world. It thrust him back into a colored crevice of his mind, albeit one that didn’t feel like his own.

”I’ll tell you what you get,” A painted man screamed, his voice trembling with resentment and despair.

Arthur blinked and found himself back in reality. He couldn’t escape into his imagination, or memory- whatever that was. A silent tear trickled down his cheek and collided with the blood spattered below his eye. His hand went to his ear as a terrible ringing took over until he finally had the sense to fall back. He fell beside a cluster of racks, his gaze not falling far to meet with- Cooper, was it? With a gaping bloody hole where the mask didn’t cover. The sight of it all would’ve turned Arthur’s stomach if the fear that took hold wasn’t so quick.

He couldn’t see the shooter beyond a navy blue pair of pants, but he could hear their voice. They sounded afraid too.

“Fuck!” The security guard trembled, clutching to his handgun as his huge eyes surveyed the space. “All of you stay down! If any of you thugs try anything I’ll shoot you, I swear. I fucking swear!” His voice broke as he turned in every which direction. “Stay right the fuck where you are and find out why Gotham isn’t afraid of you shitbags anymore. Don’t-”

Before the guard could struggle to keep himself together for another agonizing moment, the glass doors gave way. Thousands of shards flew every which way, sending another ringing through Arthur’s ears that kept him from seeing the large plumes of smoke crawling towards the ceiling. Alarms sounded to no response beyond more noise by way of screaming. Arthur didn’t scream. Slowly, he extended one arm past the curtain of clothes, then another. It felt like forever until he found his way above the lifeless body, yanking the gun with all the clumsiness of a child shoplifting from a candy store. He looked up to see the woman’s eyes frozen on his face, and without saying another word he fell back and listened.

The Joker strolled in, unburdened as his means of entry was handheld. Effective, too; the place looked as if it’d been showered by glass with the beginnings of an inferno at the base of the Christmas tree. Pristine shoes trampled over shards coating the marble floor, drawing a chorus of hushed gasps as he made his way further inside. A bullet whizzed past his shoulder and he contorted himself instinctively. Reaching into his coat, he fired a shot back. His landed into a security guard’s shoulder, the portly man falling back on himself as he clutched his shoulder. His gun skidded away, however he made no attempt to grab it as one hand went to the wound in his chest. Blood smeared against the pristine ground as he let out a string of hushed curses.

Before the Joker made another move towards him, he looked to the side. The dipshit Cooper got a hole in his head, from a mall cop no less- he got what he paid for, he supposed. A cowering woman hid feet away from Cooper’s body, but nothing else. He turned his attention back to his assailant. The would-be hero of the evening. Cocking his head, he merely watched as he stood with one leg on either side of the guard. The man let out strained gasps as he found his strength.

Faced with the gun in his attacker’s hand as the clown hunched over him, the security guard only glared as a forceful cough brought forth blood.

“Act tough all you want,” The guard coughed. “All of you are the same. You all think you control the world because you know how to scare people-” Another cough, the spasm it induced bringing tears to the man’s eyes. What looked back at him couldn’t be entirely considered a man, but a fascinated listener nonetheless. “-but you don’t. Not anymore. We have a hero now, one who isn’t afraid of nobodies like you.”

The Joker stood silently, black eyes peeking through black warpaint. He slid the revolver back into the pocket of his coat. His expression remained frozen in neutrality.

Arthur’s free hand went to his mouth when he heard an agonized scream, fearing it was his own. The broken glass that dug into his knees didn’t help. He crawled towards the gaping hole in the building’s entrance, trying to think beyond incomprehensible sounds of panic inside of his head and out. When another shot rang out, Arthur and anyone else with a semblance of a similar plan to his own dove into hiding. His spot of choice happened to be a kiosk by the jewelry counter, one that peddled the same product with a bullet hole between the eyes of its advertisement. It wasn’t until he neared its corner that he realized he wasn’t alone. Keeping balance on heels, a dark figure crouched as they sifted through what seemed to be a wallet with a handgun on the floor beside a sack. Arthur could make out a mask from behind, at once realizing it to be the unaccounted for passenger. He hoisted the gun nervously as if it was a long stick, slowly pushing it forward until the barrel met a mess of tied blonde curls.

“Put your hands up.” Arthur whispered, expecting to instantly learn why it was a terrible idea to do anything but run. He wanted that to be the case.

Instead, painted fingers slowly raised until both hands were in the air, still not a word passing between them.

Until they turned their head.

As they peered over their shoulder, Arthur could make out the details of their mask. Red at the nose and overdrawn smile and blue at the eyes, it sent a tightness through Arthur’s chest. Why exactly he couldn’t tell, but he reacted to it like a child retrieving their blanket.

“Take off the mask, now.”

Their hands went carefully to the bottom of the mask, palms open all the while. Arthur looked around as he waited, seeing no sign of the Joker or anyone who seemed remotely interested in holding him back. When the mask was gone, extended casually towards Arthur, initially it was all he could pay any mind to. He almost wanted to smile, and he would’ve had he been alone. Looking up, he saw a goon of a different stock than Cooper. Her skin was pale, although quite clearly untouched by the trendy white paint, while her face was round with an upturned nose and thin albeit shapely lips. He looked into her blue eyes and the arched brows that framed them, feeling something stir inside of him. Whatever it was, it wasn’t the time.

“Give it to me-”

Whatever he wanted to say was cut off by the abrupt distant appearance of lights shifting rapidly from red to blue. Arthur recognized those more than easily enough, preparing to risk everything and run towards the way he came. Then the ground shook, and however close the cars might’ve been, any moves towards the store would’ve happened in pieces. Another was quick to collide with the wreckage, only adding to the fiery display. Arthur’s eyes grew huge as any plan he might’ve had went up in flames alongside the cars blocking the garage. There would be easier ways of seeking death than running through fire, if he craved it so badly.

He cradled the mask in one hand but made no moves to put it on.

With the explosion came another round of panicked screaming, admittedly only agitating Arthur instead of making him fear for them- or himself.

“So,” A voice rose above the pandemonium, shaken only by the tremors of laughter. “Let’s raise the stakes. For every minute the Batman doesn’t show, I kill one of you. If he’s not here in ten minutes, I kill all of you.”

Arthur’s face contorted. He couldn’t follow what he meant, but who was to say the Joker meant anything at all? The more Arthur thought, the angrier he became. The more his expression sank, the less he cowered. He wouldn’t play hero for this asshole’s amusement. Holding the mask, seeing the blank expression so ready to reflect his own, he felt different. He felt enough to know any move he made in this place would be in vain. He remembered enough to know-

Another deafening crack sent a hale of glass shards flying from the wall. The flurry outside wasted no time spilling in, although that seemed to be the least of anyone’s worries. Nobody screamed this time. Whatever broke the window, Arthur only noticed in his peripheral.

“Oh fuck.” Seemingly without regard to the gun aimed in her direction or really any of the pandemonium going on around her, the woman scanned the room in a moment of clarity Arthur had yet to reach. Her eyes settled on a white door across the way, the same one his former captor discovered shortly before having his brains blown out. Before Arthur could raise his concerns, she sprinted through the scene and disappeared past the door nearly as quickly as he’d found her.

“You might want to be more careful,” A shaky voice spoke to no one in particular. “One wrong step and I send this entire place sky high.”

When he heard a loud crash from the wall far opposite of the wall, he decided that would be his chance. Looking where the woman once joined him, he noticed the bag was gone but the gun remained. He looked at his own, bulky and heavy, and decided to switch. This one made his hand tremble, but he held onto his wrist until he could get another look at the door,

Seemingly clear as it ever would be, Arthur weaved awkwardly between rows of clothing racks all the while grimacing at the pain in his knees and cradling the mask to his side. Rather than slam the door in the midst of a sprint, Arthur paid no mind to closing it. After a short run through a darkened room, the sharp, frozen air of night greeted him. He coughed.

He looked around, and as much as he knew he shouldn’t, he looked around for her.

But there was nobody else.

Looking both ways once more, Arthur tried to get himself together. He stumbled, paying no mind to his hands until he heard the unmistakable pop aimed towards the pavement. He jumped. This was Gotham, he’d heard it countless times; yet nothing was familiar. He had enough sense to get as far away as he could, but how far could he run? Fatigue already wore heavily on him, and despite the chill that immediately greeted him, beads of sweat stuck dark strands to his forehead right to the brow. He felt more exhausted with every breath, and it was only then that he remembered the blood still on his face.

Only one place came somewhat close enough to a home for Arthur, and he remembered it now in cripplingly perfect clarity. As bitter tears found their way down his cheeks, he picked the emptiest route and kept walking. And walking. The ground shook and he kept walking.

None of it made sense.

***

((a bit more arthur-centric this chapter, but if you stan the joker i think you’ll really enjoy the next one ;) anything y’all wanna see in the future?))

#joker x joker #dark knight joker #the dark knight #ledger!joker #phoenix!joker #jokerverse #fanfic #arthur fleck #joker 2019 #joker 2019 spoilers

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guesswho-mp3 · 5 years ago

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[ Catch Me ]

AU: batman!jaehyun, tomcat!taeyong | Pairing: character x reader | Warnings: some language, shoddy characterization, minor dom/sub themes, references to smut | Rating: 17+ | Word Count: 2.2k

Based off of the dynamic Batman and Catwoman have both in Arkhamverse and the New 52, kinda botched and this took a direction that I wasn’t planning but whatevs.

“You could’ve used the door you know.”

The intruder bolted upright, his foot catching on the window ledge, tripping before catching himself.

“Sorry Cat, old habit.” He ruffled his hair, unable to meet the man’s eyes who was leaned up against the door frame, arms crossed over his Kiss the Chef apron.

He let him off with a shake of his head. “Oh no I’m flattered. It’s not every day someone gets to see Gotham’s Prince climbing through their window. You remind me of the bad boy parents warn their kids about,” he said. His smile faltered as his gaze fell behind Jaehyun to the alarm system, wires shot and lifeless, swaying from the window sill.

The billionaire at least had the decency to look ashamed when his eyes trailed to see what he was focused on. “I’ll buy you another one,” he promised. He let out a noise of affirmation as he pivoted, leading the guilty party into his dining room, where an assortment of dishes laid on a table set for two.

“You cooked.”

“Well, last time when we were at yours you nearly burned down the whole manor attempting to make carbonara. I decided to save you from Alfred’s wrath and take care of the cuisine this time. Plus I wanted to.” He paused while filling up their wine glasses, overcome with a fondness and sincerity that nearly suffocated him with its implications. ”You’re welcome.”

Their eyes met and suddenly it was still. The usual chatter of car horns and wailing sirens that blasted through all hours of the day quieted to soft whispers. Acid bubbled and ate away at their flesh to reveal their bare bones but they loved the burn of it as they were able to see each other’s hearts and underlying scars. Both extremely fucked up inside.

That brought them some semblance of peace. They were able to understand why the other had scars marring their skin; why the other would wake up in a cold sweat, hands twisting the sheets; why they both had to become something that made their innocence cower and tremble in fear, all in the name of survival. With each other they could breathe a little easier even with Gotham’s vices smothering them.

“Cat?”

“Yes, Bat?”

“I—.”

“I know. I love you too”

Batman grabbed the goon’s neck and slammed him to the ground, the move providing leeway for Tomcat to catapult off his back and scissor kick another.

With the last of the thugs down and Two Face knocked out and handcuffed they were able to finally catch their breath. The thief languidly stretched out his already sore muscles but the Bat remained tensed, primed for a fight.

“What’s got you brooding, B-man? Get your spandex in a twist?”

“What are you doing here, Taeyong?” he asked.

The man’s peach lips pouted, “You know Bat for such a big dark secretive vigilante you sure do drop the aliases quick. I thought you liked to keep things professional dur—”

“Why are you here?” The words were made more malicious by the voice scrambler, warped and demonic, he was using the same voice he did to intimidate criminals. The feline hissed.

“Easy now. So maybe I popped in for a quick steal. I didn’t know Two Face and his lackeys would show up, but I could’ve handled it on my own.“ The vigilante didn’t like that answer.

“I know you can handle yourself, but this is about you being here, causing trouble. All the thefts!The fights! Your idiotic risk taking!” The demonic barking escalated into a frightening crescendo but the cat kept coy.

“How long do you think we can keep this up before I actually have to do something about your proclivity for burglary and not just stand by like an idiot?”

“Honestly I thought the sex would buy me some leniency,” the feline fatale admitted. “But fine you win! Take my prize that I worked so hard to steal,” he pouted, pulling out the satchel of jewels.

“It’s not that simple, Cat. If I make exceptions for you where does it end? I’m supposed to fight injustice, not share a bed with it.”

Cat narrowed his eyes. “I’m not gonna quit if that’s what you’re implying. And I’ve known you long enough now that you’re not just gonna drop me either. You care about me too much to let me fall.”

A beat.

“That’s why this has to end.”

Oh. He was serious.

“No! You don’t get to do that! If you think I’m gonna let you—“

An explosion set off, Tomcat being blinded by shutters of light, a ringing in his sensitive ears.

He hacked, waving away the plumes of fog, vision hazy. “Fucking smoke bombs. That angsty bastard. He’ll be back.”

He wasn’t.

Even with Cat’s weekly break-ins having dwindled down to zero and after being off the G.C.P.D’s radar for some time now, his good behavior still didn’t earn him any gold stars. Pictures he had in his head of Batman crawling back to him in that delicious little black number were far from the reality.

If he wanted the Bat’s attention he had to quit playing and do something big. Grab his attention. Stealing the city’s single most prized diamonds seemed like the logical thing to do.

It was truly laughable just how easy it was to slip into Gotham Jewelers undetected. After multiple robberies from his truly over the years, Taeyong couldn’t help but wonder why they never bothered to up the security. His lithe body easily sailed through the wires, not even a single scratch on him; claws cutting a perfect circle into the glass case like ribbon and snatching the necklace before she was slinking away. Right before he grappled up the ceiling grate he made sure to trip the alarm. The Bat would be there in minutes.

Opening the panel that led to the rooftop, the cat burglar easily jumped out before he actually took some time to inspect his steal. Wrapped around his neck, neon lights bounced off the glimmering diamonds as he admired himself in a puddle that had formed earlier in the day’s gloomy showers. The choker, which consisted of hundreds of intricately beaded diamonds, cost a pretty penny, but he couldn’t have given less of a shit about the price tag when her person of interest would be arriving in 3….2…..

“Thieving again, Tomcat?”

Like clockwork.

He couldn’t help the scoff that fell from his lips at his professional persona bullshit. He turned around, seeing Jaehyun’s form for the first time in awhile, some part of him wanting to run and cling to him, the other wanting to rip him to shreds. He decided on the latter. Consider it payback. “Breakups tend to make people fall back into old habits. You should know why I’m doing this more than anyone, Jaehyun.”

“I’m not here to play around, Cat. Hand over the necklace before I turn you in.” All he got in response was a raise of the burglar’s eyebrows.

“Turn me in? Oh no, you can’t do that. If I’m locked up then who's gonna play our little game of chase,” he questioned.

Let’s see,” Taeyong listed on his fingers,” Joker is in Arkham, probably running himself up the walls, Riddler is doing…Well, whatever it is Doyoungie does with his puzzles. Your little “Super Friends” are off saving the day somewhere, so sad for you, you’re out of a playmate. But put me in a cage, if that’s what you truly want. My bet is you’re just trying to get me in handcuffs again...” he trailed off, twirling his whip like a tail.

Batman visibly stiffened at the insinuation, and Tomcat purred. He’d be lying if he said a small part of him wasn’t thoroughly enjoying making this little birdy squirm. Riled up Jaehyun was always better in bed.

“Aw what’s the matter, has the reminder of our previous moonlight trysts got you hot under the cowl. We could have fun just like we used to, all you have to do is say yes.” He was a breath away from him now, daringly scraping his claws up the proud insignia splayed across the Bat’s chest.

Before he could react, a gloved hand wrapped around Cat’s neck and his back met the brick wall with a dull thud.

“What I want is the diamonds. I’m not going to ask again, kitten.”

A gasp escaped from Tomcat’s throat, roses blooming on the his cheeks at their position. God, his stubbornness was pretty fucking annoying when it was being used against him.

Cattish eyes slanted at the challenge, a growl rumbling deep within him. His razored claws didn’t penetrate the titanium tri-weave breastplate, but they still provided enough grip for him to swat Jaehyun away and glide out from under his grip. This was taking too long.

“You’ve held out longer than I thought you would. Newsflash world’s greatest detective! You’re too hard headed to see what‘s going on. I know you Jaehyun.“ Knees bent, him body coiled.

I know there’s something you want more.”

The cat pounced, paws ripping off the dark knight’s cowl and capturing his midnight lover’s lips. Provoked, Jaehyun pulled him closer by the scruff of his neck, their passionate dance of swiping tongues and nipping teeth accompanied by a symphony of pleasured groans and breathy sighs.

Slowed down to a tender waltz, the tensed crime fighter’s form went lax at the change of pace, Cat pampering him with soft pecks and kitten licks. Each note that left his mouth struck another chord within Jaehyun’s heart.

“You make it so hard to resist you,” the billionaire acquiesced.

Biting Jaehyun’s bottom lip to cause a little more mischief, the reformed thief stepped back to readjust his knight’s mask. “That’s why you love me,” he purred, smoothing his claws over Jaehyun’s cheek bones before backtracking to the edge of the roof.

“Hey pretty boy—“ Cat turned, arms spread above his head, a performer taking center stage lit up by neon lights.

“Catch me!”

Then he swandived.

Tomcat’s life had slowed down a lot since he quit the burglar business. His old schedule of dropping into banks and vaults was now exclusive to plundering criminal elite’s hideouts, which was allowed as long as she donated most of it. It earned him a reputation for being a backstabber and a traitor to his kind in the underground but every half-brain thug knew thieves were loyal to no one.

Except maybe this one to the Knight.

After a long day teaching step combinations to a bunch of chaotic and rowdy kids in his newly opened dance studio (with money earned from a cash grab from Penguin’s vault) she just wanted to curl up on the couch and watch cartoons— but nothing in his life was ever that fucking simple.

Some stupid idiot decided to break in. How ironic.

He had yet to take off his fur coat when an object in his periphery caught his gaze, the hairs on the back of his neck called to attention, eyes forming into slits. Laid poised on his four poster bed was a satin box that looked extremely out of place.

The last “gift” that was left for Tomcat on his bed sprayed chloroform in his face and she woke up dangling over a vat of acid in Ace Chemicals as bait. Not his proudest moment, but he still got a good view of the Bat’s muscles flexing when he was knocking out the Joker’s goons. If curiosity killed the cat he was sure Jaehyun would find it amusing that it was his spandex covered ass on his mind before he went out.

With caution, he raised the box up to his ear, not hearing any ticking sounds he gave it a tiny whiff and a lick, noting the absence of any chemical substance. Just to be safe, he angled his face away from the lid as he slid it off to avoid any undesirable repeat occurrences.

Nestled in the crushed velvet interior was a very familiar diamond choker, under it a receipt of purchase which he gaped at the price before crumpling it and carelessly tossing somewhere. There was a small card attached, immediately recognizing the elegant penmanship the faintest kiss of his fingertips running over the writing.

Dinner, same time as last. I look forward to seeing you in this. -J

Clasping the adornment around his neck, Cat fell back onto the sheets with a bubbly laugh, holding the card to his thrumming heart. More champagne giggles tumbled from his lips at the acknowledgement that snagging Jaehyun was her grandest heist he’d ever pulled off, his pièce de résistance complete with dimples and a savior complex. Just then he noticed his curtains fluttering, swaying from the wind entering through the cracked open window. The high-tech alarm system that must’ve cost a mini fortune sitting deactivated. He huffed, a fond grin on her porcelain features.

“Rich bastard, he owes me another one.”

Looks like the cat got the cream and gets to eat it too.

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redhoodieone · 6 years ago

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Don’t Tell Me Part 3

A/N: Okay!!! Here is Part 3 to “Don’t Tell Me” and I gotta say…it’s a little darker than I intended for it to be. Of course, I took Tim Drake’s storyline from “Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker.” In this particular story, Tim (as a young fairly new Robin, of course) was kidnapped by the Joker and was tortured mentally and physically for three weeks until Batman found him and saved him. After Tim healed, Bruce believed Tim was fine because after everything that happened, Tim seemed happy and normal. But…as the story goes…maybe Tim never healed and never got over what happened, especially since Tim’s a very emotional person.

But what will the Batfamily have to do now that Tim’s an enemy? Can they save him, or will Tim possibly have the same fate as Joker?

Warnings: Language, bird killing, betrayal, and more later on.

Jason didn’t know what to expect when he discovered Y/N was pregnant with his child, let alone what to expect when he would actually become...a father. Father... Jason Todd had a father once, before he became a ruthless crook, and went to prison. Even after, he never returned home. Jason’s mother and himself had more than a rocky relationship between drug addiction, and soon found himself alone on the streets. Which gave poor street rat Jason an opportunity to steal the Bat-mobile’s tires...and the rest is history. Bruce was a good father to him; despite his and Jason’s constant ups and downs. After the longest time of feeling replaced and betrayed, Jason even forgave Bruce and learned to love Tim as a younger brother. But in the end, Jason always considered Bruce his father, and even secretly thought that if he were to become a father, he would hope to be a worthy one as Bruce. But Jason knew he would never admit it out loud. Who would believe Jason had thought once or twice about being married and having children? No one, especially those who knew him as an angry, scarred, and troubled young man. But underneath the hard and difficult armor, Jason had always wished to have his own family at one point in his life. Ha. Family. Family... Jason still couldn’t believe Y/N is pregnant. The thought of a beautiful, wonderful, and kind woman like her carrying his child makes his heart soar and expand, as if finally, he could have the family he’s secretly hoped for most of his life.

He silently hopes Y/N got pregnant the night of his birthday, but he wouldn’t count on it. He admits he knows nothing about how conceiving works besides sex and wouldn’t know how to do the math to figure it out.

If anything, he just remembers how Y/N looked underneath him; with her hair spread out on the pillow, the sweat beading on her forehead, her breasts bouncing, and her kissable lips parted when she tried to breathe but Jason kept knocking the air from her lungs.

The fact that Y/N is even pregnant with Jason’s child makes him want her more.

But Y/N’s pregnancy is a secret to everyone else, except himself of course. Jason knew about her secret doctor’s appointments. But Jason’s questions were answered when he spied on Y/N throwing away her failed birth control.

The sickness, the little bump, and how Y/N keeps to herself just proves she’s different than before. Jason knew he was guilty as Y/N was; even when she didn’t keep up with taking her birth control, he didn’t wear condoms on most of their sexual activities because he wanted to feel her hot, wet, and tight pussy with just his bare cock. And a condom would surely prevent his fantasies and desires with Y/N.

Is it a boy? He would surely convince Y/N to name the little boy after him, since Jason was positive his son would be the spitting image of him (looks and personality, of course) and it would just make sense for a Jason Peter Todd, Jr. Is it a girl? Oh...Jason knew if he were going to have a daughter, he would love her with all his heart and do whatever it takes to protect her and Y/N for the rest of his life. Maybe this is life’s way of forgiving him, for all his sins and mistakes, so Jason can finally have the happy ending he deserves. And maybe...just maybe...Jason can be the man he’s always wanted to be. “Red Hood, you imbecile! Your communicator’s off!” Robin spats, and lands beside Batman, who are now behind Red Hood. “Are you asking to die, Todd?” “Robin...” Batman warns. His voice already deep and low, and his Bat glare already permanent on his face. “No personal names called in costumes.” “Yeah, you little shithead! What the hell do you guys want?” Red Hood snaps and twists his body around to face them. After patrolling for a couple of hours and with only a mugging and some goons stealing from a jewelry store, Jason found himself bored, and sitting next to his favorite gargoyle. He stands, and towers over Robin. “I already did my job around here, and so far, nothing has happened.” Batman growls. Jason knew his attitude and mouth weren’t helping the situation. “Okay fine, what’s going on now?” Red Hood asks as kindly as he could, which isn’t a lot. “The Joker has been missing for three days.” “So, what else is new? Joker’s been missing before, and we find him, kick his ass, and throw him back in fucking Arkham. And when he’s out again, we repeat. How’s this time any different?” Red Hood questions. “No clues. No sightings. No lead. This is different. I don’t know what he has planned this time,” Batman answers grimly. “Usually, Father and Drake always know the Joker’s actions and schemes before he does. This escape seems as if it was calculated before Joker could even thoroughly plan it himself. The escape may have been designed outside of Arkham, from a source who knows every detail of the premises and is well informed with the employee’s schedule to successfully bail him out. The question is, who could have pulled it off?” Robin asks, he hums in questioning. “Names...Robin,” Batman reminds. “Sorry,” Robin mumbles. “It’s a damn habit...” “Look, normally I would have already ranted about how your golden rule of “not killing and justice not vengeance” would have ended this cat and mouse game YEARS ago, but this is not new, Batman. I can’t fucking count how many times you’ve practically allowed Catwoman to walk out of Arkham for a booty call, or how you hand over the bad guys to Arkham for them to escape within one day. What’s so special about this one particular Joker escape?” Red Hood explains, and even lifts his gloved hand to count his fingers to name off a few ideas. “Is he going to blow up Gotham? He’s tried and failed miserably before. Is he going to kidnap Robin to attempt to turn him against you? He’s tried a million times, and it’s only worked once but that was taken care of. Is he planning to Batnap you and propose to you on top of Wayne Enterprises, because of the whole ‘chase me and I can’t live without you’ running joke, while the rest of us are tied up and gagged with bombs strapped to our chests? Maybe...” “Red Hood!” Batman shouts angrily. “Hold on, he might be onto something...” Robin considers it. “What? It’s not like Joker’s tried that yet. It’s just a fucking suggestion, old man,” Red Hood defends himself. Nightwing jumps down into a kneeling position and faces his father and brothers. A somber frown is on his face, and he gives off a negative vibe. Something’s wrong, and the rest know it. “Where’s Red Robin?” Batman asks Nightwing. “I don’t know. He hasn’t been answering his communicator all night. I can’t even get Oracle to trace it,” Nightwing answers truthfully, despite his eyes not meeting anyone’s. He exhales, and finally forces himself to look up to his father. “I...I think something’s wrong with him, Batman.” Batman breathes deeply, and walks closer to Nightwing. “What do you mean, Nightwing?” “This...this isn’t the first time this has happened. Oracle noticed he’s been MIA for a week. He hasn’t been cooperating. He hasn’t been patrolling with anyone,” Nightwing lists off his concerns. “Oh please, Grayson. Drake slacking off is hardly a concern or issue to even be worried about him. Perhaps he’s being too intimate with Y/N. He’s most likely back at the Manor, doing the baby-making process I’ve been reading up on lately. I would like a nephew, and I hope Drake’s sperm cells are sufficient swimmers and impregnate Y/N rather quickly. She has been different lately...perhaps she already is with child,” Damian reveals. “Damian!” Batman growls enraged. Jason felt his heart beat faster than before. Just hearing about Tim trying to be intimate with Y/N makes his blood boil like a volcano. “No, that-that’s not what I’m trying to talk about,” Nightwing sighs, and shakes his head. “I don’t want to say this...but I guess I’m the only one who can tell you the truth.” “Nightwing,” Batman begins and pauses instantly. He fears the worst. Batman knows he would be a fool to think all is well when the world keeps getting darker and shittier every day. “Just tell me the truth.” With one last sigh, Nightwing’s teary eyes look up to Batman’s. “O-Oracle...she has...reason to believe...t-that Tim was the one who released the Joker out.” The air got thicker. The silence between the four men shocked them; and made them question why Tim Drake would help the Joker escape. If anyone knew Bruce Wayne, they would say he’s a loving, protective father of all his children. And if one is being accused of something horrific and questionable, he would defend them until he died. “What did you just say, Dick?” Batman asks, appearing to have not heard Nightwing clearly. “W-we think Tim is responsible for allowing the Joker to escape. Y-you see, Oracle was able to go through Arkham Asylum’s surveillance cameras, and Tim had to be the one to get passed all of them successfully,” Nightwing explains hastily. “So, he’s not even on camera?” “Well, no but-“ “Then you have nothing to prove your accusation. If you have no evidence, then you can’t accuse Tim of doing something as wrong as letting an insane, murderous, criminal out of Arkham,” Batman says angrily. His breathing is uneven, and his temper is about to burst. “Let me just explain it,” Nightwing tries to reason. “No, no I don’t want to listen to your reasons, Dick. H-how dare you accuse Timothy of doing this? If anything, why not accuse Jason or Damian?” Batman yells, unable to keep his rage under control. The brothers stepped back, because Batman’s anger is frightening; even to them growing up. “Why not accuse me? After all, I don’t kill, and when I don’t kill, they’ll just keep escaping, murdering innocent people, and destroy every ounce of happiness I gain for only a short while. Because maybe I did it. Maybe Alfred did it, too.” “Do not bring Pennyworth into this,” Robin threatens. “Just listen to me for a minute. He wasn’t caught on cameras, but couldn’t someone who knows Arkham as well as us have done the job and not get caught? It would have to take a genius to go in undetected, do the job, and get out as if nothing happened? The only problem with this theory is, what would Tim get out of it? Why would he want the Joker out?” Nightwing clarifies his case. Batman stays silent. He turns to face Red Hood and Robin. “He...he wouldn’t, though. He is different. He’s always so aware and sure of everything. Why would he do this?” Batman whispers, mostly to himself. “He never had a bad past; not like the rest of us. I...I always thought he was going to stay good. I thought I would never have to worry about him.” Jason couldn’t believe this. He didn’t want to believe Dick, but something in his gut was telling him to hear him out. Could someone as good as Tim really turn bad? Would Tim happen to know his and Y/N’s secret? Oracle beeps into Nightwing’s communicator. “Go ahead Oracle.” “Nightwing...I-I have some bad news for you. Well, for all of you really. Get online now,” Oracle commands. Red Hood pushes a button inside his helmet where he is watching the screen load the video. Batman and Nightwing look down to their wrists where a screen lights up, that links them online with Oracle and Alfred. A shaky video loads, and it appears someone unknown is recording a brown shoe box, where a dark and reddish bird, a robin to be exact, is lying down dead with its eyes open outside of a nest with two small bird eggs inside. “Well! Isn’t this precious! This robin birdie was a mother,” the voice belongs to Joker. His high screeching laugh made the men silently gasp. The camera moves away from the mother bird and zooms in on the eggs. “Aww...new life. They say in death, live continues on...but not for these unborn children.” The camera then turns around and Joker’s face takes up the entire screen. His dark eyes send shivers down the Batman and Batboy’s bodies. His painted red lips curved up into a deadly smile. “I finally have your attention now, Bats? You’re probably asking yourself, ‘Now why would the Joker attack and brutally kill a bird, who just laid her eggs, and didn’t have the beautiful opportunity to see her children hatch from their little eggs, and take that first breath in this dark, evil, and deadly world I, Joker reign in?’ You know, while I usually take my sick pleasure in torturing your family Bats, or some innocent people I don’t even know or care about. But I must say Bats...even your family can surprise me!” Joker laughs hysterically, before he dramatically frowns. With a hand holding his cheek, his mouth opens wide. “And let’s just say, this wouldn’t all be possible without your third Robin...” Batman growled and shut his eyes tightly. This was too much for him. Red Hood feels his insides burning with rage. No, no there’s no way Joker could know...he thought to himself. Tim wouldn’t do this... “I am beyond surprised Bats! Even I couldn’t have done this all by myself! After all, who would have thought that the second former dead Robin would have knocked up a woman, who is supposedly dating your third Robin? Did you know that, Bats? The so-called damned Prince of Gotham knocked up the Batfamily slut, Y/N Y/LN. Now that’s a mouthful! And now I bet you’re wondering where your faithful and more-than alive Robin is,” Joker says, and turns the camera and it zooms in on Tim Drake, dresses from head to toe in his former Robin costume but painted in exact Joker makeup. “Who would I thought I could manipulate and influence his mind twice? He must not be as sane as you believed, Bats!” Batman’s breathing heavily in panic. When Tim Drake was younger, Joker managed to kidnap him and manipulate him into being Joker’s son. But luckily Batman was able to treat him and stop Joker’s influence from taking over his mind. But maybe Joker is right. Maybe Tim isn’t as sane and good as he once believed. Red Hood watches in complete horror how Tim glances up at the camera and smiles, very similar and terrifying as Joker’s. “Whoever this Robin was...his spirit is destroyed, as I have destroyed the second’s, and even yours, Bats!” Joker cackles. Joker turns the camera once more as he holds up the robin’s eggs to the lens. “Oh, and as for these baby birds? I can’t wait to eat them, just like I can’t wait to eat yours, Red Hoodie!” Joker tosses back the robin’s eggs into his mouth and his teeth breaks apart the poor, unborn birds’ eggshells. The liquid from the eggs, blood, and flesh stick to his teeth, creating a grayish ooze with blood, and his maniac eyes shine as his laugh echoes throughout the tape. “Now, that was very delicious! Those robin eggs were tasty, and I know Red Hoodie’s and Y/N’s will be very tasty too! Isn’t that right, Y/N?” Joker asks, and turns the camera to face Y/N, lying on a dirty, torn up hospital bed, but she appeared to be groggy and unresponsive to her name. “Well, she’s just tired because being pregnant with Red Hood’s baby MUST be exhausting! That kid’ll come out like a cannonball!”

Jason clenched his teeth and fists. He was pissed off; angry and frustration weren’t enough. A sudden strong energy takes over his body. He feels the urge to protect his love, and his child. No matter what. Even if he must kill Joker.

Jason no longer cares about the golden rule. The love of his life and unborn child are in danger, and if he doesn’t find them, he’d lose them both.

He’d even lose Tim…his brother.

“I’ll even eat her egg when she’s just three months along! You know me Bats!” Joker’s laugh ends when the tape ends.

The screens are off when Red Hood notices Batman, Nightwing, and Robin are glaring at him. “We’ll talk more about that at home. Until then, we need to find the Joker, and save Tim and Y/N,” Batman announces, and motions the boys to follow him. “How dangerous could Drake even be? He has the anger and the strength of a toddler,” Robin claims sarcastically. Batman stops, and faces his sons. There is the worry, the anger, the tears in his eyes he can’t fight back anymore. “None of you remember how Tim was back then. You had your own life Dick, the solo career as Nightwing. Jason, you were back into Gotham with your vengeance. And Damian, I didn’t even know you existed. So, none of you were there when Tim was just starting off as my Robin. He was a happy kid, a kid who loved to learn and be the best. But Joker got to him before me. He tortured him for three weeks. Brain washed him. Torment him mentally and physically. Used him as a solider to get back at me. But because of Tim’s natural innocence and happiness, he was made a perfect target. Tim…was and still is an emotional guy. If something were to snap in his head, it would be the end for him. If he wanted to, Tim could have killed hundreds, maybe even thousands, just to hurt me. Tim was and still is the perfect solider, and I’m going to be the one who pays, again,” Batman confesses. “Why would you pay? I’m the one who should be paying for what I’ve done,” Red Hood asks quietly. Batman releases a choked sob. “Because I knew about Tim’s pain...and I never helped him. I didn’t think he’d ever need help.”

“What do you mean?” Nightwing asks. “Did you know this was bound to happen?”

“Yes. I knew it was eventually going to happen. And now that it’s happened…I have to stop him myself.”

Jason knew what Bruce meant, and while Bruce may have a plan, Jason knew he wasn’t going to stand beside him when it comes down to the Joker.

Jason wants nothing more than to put a bullet through the Joker’s skull.

“If he hurts Y/N, the baby, and Tim,” Jason chokes out before he manages to pull himself together. Hot tears are streaming down his cheeks, and he thanks God he has his hood on. “I’m going to kill the Joker. I don’t give a fuck about your golden rule anymore. If you get in my way, I’ll kill you too. If you kill me right after, I’d still not give a shit. Because what’s it going to take for you to realize he’s a fucking monster who’ll keep doing this over and over again until you’re the last one standing? So, how many more people have to die or be crippled for you to see he needs to die? Me?! Barbara?! Tim?! Y/N?! My fucking unborn child?! Or does Alfred, Dick, or Damian have to be the last ones for you to see it?” Jason screams.

Batman exhales. A pained look is on his face, and he looks defeated already.

“Maybe this time…I won’t stop you from doing that…if it needs to be done.”

#dc comics #jason todd x reader #jason todd x y/n #batfam #batman #red hood #nightwing #robin #joker

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qtcomicsblog · 5 years ago

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Justice league unleashed “Harley comes to stay”

Justice league unleashed "Harley comes to stay" Metropolis. Diana is at a ice cream parlor eating a sundae. She gets a text from etta candy and is trying to text her back. Diana: This texting, is so hard. Diana gets an alert of a robbery. Diana: Looks like something's going on, i better go see. CAN I GET THIS TO GO?! At a jewelry store harley quinn is breaking the cases Harley: Come on, come on! Diana: HARLEY QUINN! What do you think you're doing? Diana eats the rest of the ice cream and throws the empty bowl on the floor Harley: Wonder woman, thank goodness. I need you the hide me. Diana: Hide you? A car pulls up and men with guns get out and open fire in the store. Diana: By the gods! Diana generates a shield to protect herself and harley. She throws her shield at one of them knocking him out, she makes quick work of the men and tied them up with the lasso of truth. Diana: why did you attack me? Man: we weren't attacking you we wanted the clown chick Diana: Harley? She sees harley trying to get away and one of the men try to run her over. diana crushes the car and grabs harley and flies off. She drops harley on a roof. Diana: What was that harley, why were those guys after you? Harley: because of this Harley shown diana a wanted poster with harley's face on it. Diana: an addition to everything else you have a bounty on your head? Harley: Well the thing is... ummm Diana: Harley what's going on? Harley: ehhh, I may have take out a loan from the penguin to finance an evil scheme i was planning, and when i say "evil scheme" i mean go on a gigantic shopping spree. Diana: and you welshed on the loan Harley: if by welshed you mean try to blow penguin up when he came looking for his money, then yes i welshed up bad. Diana face-palms Harley: That's why i caused such a ruckus at that jewelry store i wanted to get the leagues attention. Diana: harley can't you get the joker the help you or your bff poison ivy Harley: Ivy's in arkham and puddin' would just rat me out to save his own booty. Diana: Then why don't you just tell batman, he's in gotham Harley: I can't trust battsie with my safety, he'll just throw into arkham and pengie can bribe a guard to put a bullet in me. Look, i know this is alittle un-lady like but... Harley breaks down on her knees and beg and pleas for her help Harley: YOU GOTTA HELP PLEASE, YOU'RE HEROES YOU'RE SUPPOSE TO HELP PEOPLE IN NEED EVEN PEOPLE LIKE ME! I'LL NEVER SURVIVE OUT THERE, PLEASE YOU THINK I DESERVE TO DIE, I NEED YOU SUPERHEROES PLEASE PROTECT ME! Diana: For hera's sake Harley show some dignity Harley: PLEASE PLEASE I AM BEGGING AND PLEAING TO YOU PLEASE! I CAN'T DIE! I CAN'T DIE! Diana: Alright alright i'll help you Harley: Really? I knew you would if i cried enough Harley hugs diana. diana holds her up Diana: Alright i'll put you in the one place penguin and his goons can't get to you At night at the watch tower diana is sneaking harley in and take her to an empty room. Harley is giggling. Diana: Shhh, quiet harley you'll wake everyone up Harley: i'm sorry it's just, i'm in the watch tower, at night. Diana: shh, the watch tower is the only place in the world where penguin wouldn't dream of finding you. I'm already stretching it for sneaking you in here, if batman finds out about this he'll give me that "Look." Harley gets chills Harley: I hate that look Diana: We all do diana opens the door Diana: you can stay in here for the time being so please don't touch or do anything to cause attention. Harley: wonder woman i want to thank you help me in my time of need like a human being Diana: Sure thing harley just don't let the rest of the league find out your here Harley: Wait, how about alittle jack and the beanstalk? Diana: I am not reading you a bed time story harley Harley: no, it's a drink i made. It's green beans, sweet corn, and chocolate mixed together harley squirts it in her mouth Harley: it taste terrible Diana: Goodnight harley we'll talk in the morning The Next Morning Diana goes to the kitchen and the league is eating breakfast Diana yawns Superman: Morning everyone, hey has anyone seen my bathrobe? Green lantern: Nah uh. Green lantern eating cereal. Flash runs in Flash: Anyone seen my I-pod, i can't exercise without my inspiring jams Diana: Did you forget them in your room again? Diana gathers some food and about to go to harleys room. Hawkgirl rushes in angry Hawkgirl: ALRIGHT WHO TOOK MY BOBA?! Green lantern: Don't look at me Harley walks in wearing superman’s bathrobe listening to flashes i-pod and drinking hawkgirls boba. Harley: Morning all! Flash: THAT'S MY I-POD! Superman: THAT'S MY BATHROBE! Hawkgirl: THAT'S MY BOBA! Green lantern: HARLEY QUINN! The league goes to attack harley but diana stops them Diana: STOP! Green lantern: What are you doing diana, their's a villain in the watchtower! Diana: I know, i'm the one who brought her here. Hawkgirl: Say what?! Flash: WHA?! Green lantern: YOU DID WHAT?!! Superman: WHAT IN THE WORLD?! J'onn: Diana. Diana: just let me explain but please don't tell batman she's here Batman: who's here. batman appears behind them and scowls Harley: hi battsie! In the conference room the league are having a meeting about harley's situation Batman: No. Diana: But bruce she has a price on her head and she has nowhere to turn to Batman: if she wants to go somewhere she can go to arkham Diana: She can't, she'll be a sitting duck Batman: She's not staying here Diana: Come on she needs our help, we're heroes we help those in need, even people like harley Superman: She's right, if we turn our back on her where we could've helped her, how could we call ourselves heroes. Batman: No Flash: I guess we could let her stay Green lantern: if she's desperate enough to come to us for help, she must really be in trouble Hawkgirl: Ok just as long as she doesn't drink my boba again J'onn: Agreed Batman is silent Harley is waiting in the living room and the league enters Diana: Harley, After much discussion, we're all decided to let you stay Superman: but only until we take care of penguin Harley: YAHTZEE! I'LL MAKE WAFFLES! Harley goes to kitchen Batman: You're gonna regret this Later in the watchtower wonder woman is on monitor duty and Jessica is playing video games. loud sounds of construction can be heard from harley's room. Jessica: What is all that noise? Diana: Harley, i can't work with all the racket going on The noise stops and harley opens the door Harley: oh hey Wondy Diana: Harley what are you doing in there? Harley: oh just some re-decorating, making this room feel like home. Diana: That's nice harley but please just keep it down Harley: Aye Aye Cap'n! As soon as diana leaves harley gets back to building Diana: Harley i told you to keep it... huh? Diana sees harley's finished room with all the circus themed furniture Harley: Pretty fly huh, now this place feel like home Diana: uh huh In the watchtower media room jessica is playing video games and harley is working out with loud music. Jessica: harley i'm trying to play my game Harley: Just doing my daily workout keeping my girlie figure girlie. Jessica groans Flash is in the kitchen and goes to the refrigerator Flash: We're out of milk? i just bought this milk he sees harley eating cereal straight out of the box Hawk girl is looking around for her mace Hawk girl: Has everyone seen my mace? Harley: you mean this birdie girl, here you go. Hawk girl smells something and it comes from the mace Hawk girl: what's that smell? Harley: Oh i had to unclog the toilet be sure to wash that really good hawk girl eye twitches Superman doing laundry and he sees all of her white shirts are pink. Superman: What the... Harley shows up Harley: oh thanks supes, awww fresh clean shorts. Harley mixed her red shorts with superman's white clothes Night time harleys loud snoring can be heard throughout the watchtower. No one can sleep. The next morning the league is exhausted and harley is cheerful Harley: Good morning everyone! Hawgirl: Yeah maybe for you it is Harley: What with you guys? Hawgirl: Your snoring kept us up all night, i'm use to diana's snoring but yours is just unbearable. Harley: I don't snore Flash: Yes you do Hawkgirl: What happened to all the cereal? and the milk? and the butter? And the eggs? Harley burps Harley: Pardon me Hawkgirl: I just get some OJ. Harley: Uh about that... Hawkgirl: You drank it all did you? Harley: Yes. Hawgirl: I think i'll skip breakfast Flash: I'm gonna go get a breakfast burrito Jessica: I'm gonna go play a game Jessica leaves to kitchen. Jessica is upset Jessica: HARLEY! Harley: Yep. Jessica: Did you perchance play my game? Harley: Maybe alittle Jessica: Alittle? YOU BROKE MY CONTROLLER! Harley: Sorry, the game cheated on me and i got angry Jessica's face turns red in anger and creates a chainsaw construct to attack harley. Diana use the lasso to stop her Diana: Calm down jessica jessica calms down and walks off Harley: Where ya goin' greenie? Jessica: To the game store to buy a new controller Harley: ok, hey you mind getting me a burger? Superman: I think i'll go on patrol Diana sighs Diana: harley this is not going well, if you're gonna stay here you need to be more considerate to the league Harley: Sorry wondy Diana: It's ok harley, can you at least clean of the kitchen? Harley: OH THANKS FOR REMINDING ME WONDY! I've been here for two days and i haven't had a shower. Harley leaves the kitchen Diana: Wait harley.. Harley: Don't worry i'll find it! Harley sees the league locker room Harley: aw sweet Diana is cleaning up the kitchen when a mirror sparkles and Heatwave goes through it determined to claim harley bounty Heatwave: Alright that money it mine He goes to find her until he is hit from behind by diana Diana: Heatwave? HARLEY! Diana spins around transforming into wonder woman. Harley is taking a shower A mirror in the locker room sparkles and out came killer croc, he sees harley showering and sneak up to her and opens his jar to bite her. But diana gets his tail and throws him away from her Harley: Huh? Diana fights croc to keep him away from harley Harley: What in the world? Crocie? Diana: Run harley! Harley: I'm still naked Diana: GO! Harley runs wearing a towel. Harley goes into the nearest room where happens to be Diana's room. Harley: (Gasp) I'm in wonder womans room. She looks into her closet and harley eyes sparkle and she makes a big smile. Diana is fighting killer croc Diana: there's only one villain that could make this possible.. A mirror sparkles and mirror master walks out Diana: Mirror master! Mirror master: Hit the nail on the head amazon, we're here for the clown but beating you is just a bonus. Diana throws croc at him and goes to the main computer and contact the rest of the league Diana: JUSTICE LEAGUE! INTRUDERS IN THE WATCHTOWER! GET BACK HERE NOW! I REPEAT INTRUDERS IN THE WATCHTOWER! Heatwave attack diana with his flamethrower Heatwave: you're not gonna stop us amazon The three villains surround her Diana: I can handle you three on my own no problem Harley: BUT YOU WON'T HAVE TO! Harley jumps out wearing one of diana's suits Harley: NO NEED TO FEAR, WONDER HARLEY IS HERE! Diana: Harley? IS THAT MY SUIT? Mirror master: There she is! Wonder woman and Harley quinn attacks the villains Wonder woman crushes heatwaves flamethrower and knocks his out with a punch. Mirror master shoots at harley and she dodges them. She pulls out diana's sword and lunges at him Diana: Harley careful with that! Killer croc grabs diana and she throws him. Harley hits mirror master with the flat part of the sword and wonder woman kicks him in the face. Harley: Booyah team supreme! Diana: Give me that harley! Croc gets back up and charges at them. They dodge him and harley pulls out her hammer Diana: Much better choice Harley: Awww. Croc attacks diana and grabs his tail and spins him around and harley activates her hammer thrusters and spins around uncontrollably and diana swings him into harley hammer spin hitting him in the face. Diana stops the hammer and harley is dizzy Harley giggles Harley: Did we get 'em? Diana: Yes, we got them Mirror master gets up and points his mirror gun at them. He is stopped and restrained by jessica and the rest of the league show up and restrain the other villains. Harley: Well aren't you guys tarty to the party, ME AND WONDY ALREADY TOOK CARE OF IT! Superman: I can see that, and batman called he took care of penguin and called off the hit Harley: YAHTZEE! The next day harley has all her stuff packed. Harley: Well that's all of it. Looks like it's time to head out Jessica: Goodbye harley Flash: Stay in touch Harley: Before I got I want to say thanks to you guys for letting me stay, especially you wondy. You helped me when I had no one to turn to, you're a great hero and a good friend. Diana: You're welcome harley, and good luck. Harley: Thanks and don't worry about me no one can hold down Harley quinn, oh and I left you guys a goodbye gift in the kitchen. Bye! Harley leaves on her motorcycle Superman: I got to admit harleys not that bad Diana: Yeah, it was the right thing to do and if i had to do it again I will. Superman and diana see the gift harley left Superman: Harley wrote on the wall! Diana: "Thank you Justice League!" Aww so sweet Hawkgirl: Uh diana, looks like harley wrote this in ice cream, your ice cream. Diana sees an empty container and her eyes widened and irises shrink Diana: GET THAT CLOWN!!!! Diana runs after her wielding her sword Diana: I'LL RIP YOUR LUNGS OUT!! Superman: DIANA CALM DOWN! Batman: I know this was a bad idea. END.

#DC comics #justice league unleashed #fan series #fan episode #harley comes to stay

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steveslab · 2 years ago

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#IFTTT #The Avocado

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bearpillowmonster · 4 years ago

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Yakuza Kiwami Review

Welcome to a japanese 'The Game Plan', the video game adaptation. (Kind of) I wanted to start this review with a first impressions, so I'm writing this after playing the first few chapters of the game.

First off, I like the atmosphere, the town is nice, I like learning the street names and seeing all the people on the road and talking to them. There are even drunks running about (more like stumble about) which is such an odd little feature.

There are plenty of battles, including street fights and each one increases your experience, however if there's a person who wants to pick a fight, they will chase you down at times until they can get close enough to talk to you, you "can" outrun them and cheese it by walking in a nearby store or something then walking back out. I'm not going to complain because it's a remake of a game on the PS2 (which I try to take into account for this review) but some of the models are janky at times with the way the models jerk but again, no big deal. There's a sprint system but he'll get tired and stop to catch his breath but you can reuse it right after, no bar to refill or anything but I will say that the health bar doesn't refill itself unless you die or get something to eat, so be wary if you're going into a fight.

There's a pretty decent skill tree like stuff to increase your health, tech, etc. I'm sure you already know that you can pick up random items like chairs, motorcycles, traffic cones and such to fight with but it really is fun to mess around with, just adds to the world building. It also has a play-style system with Brawler, Beast, Rush, and Dragon to fit however you like to play (I like Brawler best). If you played FF7 Remake, it kind of reminds me of the Operator vs Punisher mode, I wonder if they were inspired by this game. I know I'm going to offend some people here but this is what the Arkham franchise's combat wishes it was (as far as Asylum and City go, I never played the other ones) I just like this more.

Now the story is pretty simple but pretty decent, I still can't believe this is the same guy who made Super Monkey Ball. I could see where it might build for the future games, I wanted to start with Yakuza 5 because I hear that's the best besides 0 and I don't normally care for continuity and do it with plenty of game series and don't have any trouble for the most part but the 5th entry in the saga seems a little more steep than say the 2nd or 3rd so I'm happy to settle on the first.

First impressions over, let's get into the thick of it.

The story is pretty cutscene heavy. Goofy at times but I still dig it, especially seeing Kiryu and Haruka interact.

How are the bosses? Well, the first proper boss is Shimano. There are some mini bosses before it but he's the big one. In the first Kingdom Hearts game, if a boss has a good amount of health, they'll stack the health bars into different colors, such as green, yellow, and orange, this is very similar to that. Shimano isn't what you should base the bosses on because he's a tough first boss, he's very strong and drawn out, but in a way kind of reflective because Kiryu is meant to be a bit rusty after all that time and this dude is huge on top of it so of course he's going to have a rough time with him. Narrative-wise, it makes sense but it's still a hard, kind of unforgiving and annoying boss battle. (also why didn't Kiryu just point out the hole in the window or have Kazama say otherwise??) Just know that they aren't normally like that.

I will say that the Akai break-dancing trash of the bloody eye were also super annoying though. You can't even approach the older brother, one is fine, but two? And a buncha goons?

My actual worst enemy is falling over though...

Majima is more of a rival but you fight him frequently. He reminds me of somebody I know, and that's what makes him funny but I don't like him, you're not really supposed to like him. He does have one of the best fights of the game though and if you’re dedicated then you can upgrade your dragon abilities through him.

One thing that I know may put people off from this game is the localization because for one, "Yakuza Kiwami" actually sounds kinda cool but it's very japanese which means, there is no dubbing, which is kind of rare for big games such as this, you just rely on subtitles. If it doesn't bother you with anime then it's fine. It's actually really fun. Now I have the PC edition but that's mainly because it was on sale (then it was on sale on the PS store a few weeks later which made me pretty salty) but I easily just plugged in my PS4 controller and it was all good, especially since "Real Yakuza use a gamepad". I personally wouldn't recommend the keyboard and mouse setup though as it can seem kind of tedious.

Random Section! Each dude has a name so I know who I'm trash talking. You ask Shinji for money early on but never pay him back and that really bothers me. I will say that the weapons and items you buy should have a stats chart so that you can tell if an item is stronger than one you have (how is an umbrella stronger than a revolver??) you kind of just have to take a shot in the dark based on price. Now once does Kiryu place the blame on anybody even after his 10 years and everything he's been through, it's really honorable, mad respect but it might've saved some hassle at certain points...

One thing that surprised me is just how easy it is to get a lot. I mean it makes sense because you're a yakuza, but I'm not used to getting so much CP after just a few fights and money out the wazooh (not always through fights, but sell a few things and see where you get). There are side missions but are they interesting? I mentioned the random people wanting to beat you up, but there are those that chase you and the ones that are beating on somebody else where you can choose to intervene, like how you would do basic stuff like taking someone to the hospital or stopping a robbery in Spider-Man. But then there are the ones with more context. A homeless man that needs a coat, a girl being harassed by men but then she takes you for a drink, none of them stand out a whole lot or lasts too long (because there are so many) but they're interesting little side things. There’s obviously lots to do, so I know I haven’t even experienced everything.

I mentioned atmosphere and how I liked exploring, you can take a cab, but I would say at least learn the area first, you find tons of little stuff like locker keys. Was it worth losing Super Monkey Ball over this? Not really but you can get an AiAi plush in the claw machine! Was it a good game though? Yeah, I'd have to say so, I'll be moving on to more in the series, Kiwami 2 seems like the next logical approach.

#yakuza #yakuza kiwami #review

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paperribcage · 8 years ago

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How Nygmobblepot could be end game for Season 3:

This was written in the Gotham hiatus after 3x14, it contains no spoilers, and it is simply a mix of speculation and creative license.

After Oswald has come back, (Reanimated by Dr Strange at the request of Fish) Fish manages to re-inspire his villainous soul. Telling Oswald to join her army so they can re-claim the crime empire of Gotham together.

Oswald sets out to kill anyone he spared in the first half of season three. Convinced that love made him weak and he has returned determined to correct any lives he spared, as part of his rebirth. Including Tabatha, then Jim, then Edward.

- Oswald makes an attempt on Tabitha’s life. After threatening Tabitha, Butch wants Oswald dead. Edward says Oswald is his to kill and tells Butch that anyone who takes the pleasure of killing Oswald from him will pay dearly. Butch points out that he sounds like he is protecting him, Edward denies it. Butch says he will stop looking for Oswald, if Edward can promise to kill him when he finds him.

- When Edward does find Oswald it is a huge action packed confrontation. Guns blazing. Edward and Fishes mutant army vs Edward and the sirens hired goons. At the end of the confrontation, the place is trashed, everyone else has either fled or died. In the end, Its just Edward Nygma and Oswald Cobblepot, both panting and disheveled, holding a gun to each other.

After Edward admits he can’t take the shot and re-live the grief of losing his best friend again. Oswald suspects he is trying to manipulate him. Oswald tells him “he would say anything to save his own life,” (Mirroring what Edward told him when he was tied to a car in 03x14) Though, while Oswald doesn’t trust him, be begrudgingly admits… he won’t kill him either, but that doesn’t mean he forgives him for the docks. Its a start.

- Oswald and Edward unite against a common enemy, the GYPD. They work really well together. Edward is the planning, Oswald is the action. Just like old times, albeit with some tension. Right before they are about to take down the common enemy, Edwards sends a riddle to the GYPD, and doesn’t tell Oswald.

- Their plan all goes to hell. The police show up, Oswald asks how they found them and Edward admits their predicament is all his fault. He admits to leaving a clue and expects Oswald to be livid. Instead Oswald tells him that there is nowhere he would rather be, than in Gotham, having a shoot-out with the GYPD with his best friend. They are better together than alone.

- Edward reminds Oswald that he would still “Do anything for him” and wants to sacrifice himself so that at least Oswald can get away. Oswald tells Edward if he manages to get out uncaught, to meet him at the the “safe house”.

- Edward gets caught by the Police, GYPD says if he can tell them where Oswald Cobblepot is, they will send him to Backgate not Arkham Assylum. Though Ed hated his time in Arkham, he refuses. (Mirroring how Oswald wouldn’t give up Edward, in 03x14.)

- Edward, defeated, gets in the van to take him to Arkham.

- As the van travels, from the back of the transport van Ed feels the van almost topple over as it swerves and comes to a stop. He sees the driver get out and then hears a gunshot and a thud. A small explosive is detonated to get the locked van door off its hinges. Edward steps back, cautious that it could be Barbra or Butch with bad intentions. Only to see Oswald Copplepot emerge from the smoke. Edward delighted to see his friend and dizzy with the relief that is isn’t going back to Arkham. He embraces Oswald in a bone crushing hug. Oswald admits that he would do anything for him too.

(“I’d do anything for you” is basically their “I love you” at this point)

- Intent on ruling Gotham side by side. They get into the getaway car and drive off into the sunset as the sound of GYPD police sirens wail in the background.

But thats just me - what would you like to see happen?

#gotham #nygmobblepot #nygmobblepositivity #edward nygma #oswald cobblepot #penguin #riddler #edward x oswald #oswald x edward #season3 #thedocks #paperribcage

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cvioleta · 8 years ago

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Everything She Wants, Part 4

Her office phone rang and Harleen picked it up absent-mindedly. Whenever she wasn’t with a patient, she had been viewing photographs from school yearbooks at the elementary schools closest to where Oakhaven Country Club had been, trying to narrow down a facial structure that might be a young Joker.

“This is Dr. Quinzel.”

“Harls?” Ben’s voice crackled from the distance. “Are you all right? You didn’t respond to my email last night or my texts this morning. I was worried!”

Crap, crap, crap, I totally forgot. “Honey, I’m sorry I worried you! I, uh, turned off my ringer for a session yesterday afternoon and completely forgot to turn it back on.” Change the subject fast, Harl – that sounds lame even to you. “How is Dubai? How have your meetings been going?”

Ben, true to form, was easily led. He jumped at the opening to talk about his trip, filling her in about Dubai and his very successful first day there. He was sure the deal was going to go off without a hitch and it looked like they were going to get in some golf. Next to Harleen, Ben loved golf above all else. She never understood the appeal of what to her was a slow paced and boring game, but it got him out of the house on weekends so that she could go to yoga or indulge herself in her secret, guilty pleasure, reading romance novels. The men in those books were nothing like the man in her house…they were exciting, unpredictable and dominant. Harleen fantasized frequently about a man who would take the lead, but had yet to encounter one in real life. Ben couldn’t even pick a restaurant without her help, yet could somehow successfully run a multi-million dollar business. It was inexplicable and frustrating.

The phone alarm binged, reminding Harleen of her session with the Joker in 10 minutes. “Ben, I have to go, I’ve got a patient at 2 p.m., but I’m so glad you’re having a successful trip. Get some sleep and call me in your morning!”

“I will, and watch your door for a surprise!”

Harleen froze for a second but then realized that Ben’s comment had nothing to do with what she’d found on her doorstep that morning. “I can’t wait,” she responded. She ended the call, touched up her lipstick and prepared for battle.

When she arrived at the room, her patient wasn’t there yet. She looked at the guard and raised an eyebrow.

“He ain’t cooperating today, Dr. Q,” the guard grumbled. “Two of the boys went to get it done.”

She nodded and decided to wait in the hallway so that she could continue to search Oakhaven pictures on her phone. The reception in the session room was nonexistent. As she browsed, she heard a commotion from behind her. She turned and saw the Joker being marched down the hallway by two guards who had him restrained in every way possible. Straps over his head and face had been added to the straitjacket, as well as ankle chains connecting his feet so that he could only move at a slow shuffle. Arkham’s guards were burly, ex football player types whereas the Joker was slim and athletic. Harleen wondered why the overkill. The guards wrestled the Joker into the room and strapped him to the waiting chair. His hair was wild, he was sweating and she could see that he had fresh bruises and cuts on his face and hands.

“He’s a crazy motherfucker, Doc., there ain’t no fixing that,” opined a beefy but none too bright guard named Kuzik.

Harleen was suddenly angry. “Where did you get your psychiatry degree from, Kuzik? The ones in the bottom of a Crackerjack box don’t count.”

From inside the room, she heard the Joker cackling. He’d stop quickly enough when he realized he was her next target. She entered and closed the door. The Joker was smiling delightedly at her.

“Shut up,” she said and saw the anger flare for a moment in his face. “We’re going to start today by talking about the word no. I don’t think you hear it a lot.”

He laughed again, “Oh, I hear it, Doctor. It just tends to stop after I shoot them in the mouth.”

Harleen sat down and stared at him. She would show no weakness, nor look away. “Did you think I’d be impressed that you found out where I lived? Any 13 year old with an Internet connection could do that,” she scoffed.

“But I’m not a 13 year old with an Internet connection. I’m a 35 year old who is sitting before you trussed up like a turkey, “ he observed.

Harleen shrugged. “Your goons are earning their keep. I’d love to analyze them and find out what scares them so much that they obey you even when you are, in your own words, locked up here and trussed up like a turkey.”

The Joker smiled. “A better question is, what scares you so much that you’ve hooked up with a yuppie with an MBA and the personality of a piece of cardboard? I’m so disappointed in you, I thought you had more spirit than that. I bet he plays golf, doesn’t he, Doctor? Probably watches it on television all weekend long, too.”

Yes, and I hate it, she thought. But she remembered herself and her position and she was determined not to react to anything she said. “Playing golf is a healthy, nonviolent way of relieving stress. You might want to try it,” she offered, smiling just as amiably. “Your methods of relieving stress aren’t working out so well for you.”

Cut the maniacal laughter; it was like everything she said was funny. “On the contrary,” the Joker argued, “I have fame, wealth and – how did dear old Dr. Arkham put it? – an army to do my bidding.”

Did he have the whole place bugged? Amazing. “But not your freedom,” Harleen reminded him.

“Do you reaaaaally believe this place could hold me if I chose to go?” he asked her.

Harleen supposed that it did not, but was confused just the same. “Why wouldn’t you choose your freedom if it was an option?”

The Joker smiled. “It’s easy to get. Most things are easy to get – freedom, money, guns, alcohol, drugs…women. After a while, it’s all so tedious.”

“You stay in an asylum because it’s too easy to leave?” she asked softly. He didn’t answer, just gave her a look she couldn’t decipher.

The Joker shifted in his chair and tried to roll his shoulders in the straitjacket. “Dr. Quinzel, may I ask a small favor?”

“You can always ask,” she answered, leaving unsaid that asking did not mean getting. He caught it and grinned. She was a firecracker, underneath her outward politeness and decorum. What would it take to light her up? Time to start finding out.

“I have a horrible itch right under my left shoulder blade and I can’t move in this thing. Would you mind?”

She took a moment to consider if there was any way he could harm her if she was standing behind him. She didn’t think so, plus in that position she could easily flip him if by some chance he got free. As he had correctly observed in their first session, she was trained in martial arts – and very good at it. Harleen got up and walked around the table, taking care to stay at a safe distance until she was fully behind him. It was hard to even figure out where a shoulder blade would be under the straitjacket, but she made her best guess and began to scratch his back.

“Ohhhhh…just a bit lower. Yes, that’s it right there.” Harleen could not help but notice how the man was made of solid muscle. Every inch felt taut and fit under her fingertips. She was tempted to run a hand up the bicep that she could see bulging out from the restraint – she’d always been turned on by muscular arms. Stop it for God’s sake, this is a patient and on top of that he’s a psychotic killer who’s already stalking you. Go sit down! She forced herself to return her hands to her sides and walked back to her own chair.

The Joker looked peaceful. “I think I’m done talking for today. Thank you for the assistance. I’ll stop giving Tweedledum and Tweedledumber a hard time.”

“That would be nice,” Harleen observed. “If what’s easy is boring to you, then violence should have become boring a long time ago.”

He leaned forward. “Violence is like sex, Doctor. Even if it’s easy to get – it can still be fantastic.” The Joker was still laughing as she walked out of the room without a backward glance.

#joker x harley #harley x joker #joker and harley #harley quinn

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