#this isn't really tmi but
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i've never even seen the show First is from and yet i love your First x Chase Young ship so i have to ask. If anything did HAPPEN between the two of them what sort of emotions would they be dealing with afterwards?
Wow, this is such an unexpectedly nice compliment for me? Cause it means, you are a Chase/XS fan, who saw my crack ship and went 'I don't know what's going on, but I enjoy your silly little ship, funny crossover shipper.' and you know what? It's very nice and made me happy. ;) Thank you!
And well who said nothing ever happened between them lol IF anything happened between those two (be it emotional or physical ;3), their default way of dealing it would be DENIAL DENIAL DENIAL, in similar but also in slightly different ways.
Chase Young is a man who seemingly doesn't do softer emotions. Any possible feelings and reactions who could be attributed to him actually caring about First Ninja, are re-labeled in his head into him doing all of this because he is trying to manipulate First on his side (and he totally still is, but he also now wants to feed that man, talk with him during long evenings and perhaps take a nap with him, you know, disgusting cute domestic stuff amidst oh i dunno- taking over the world and being evil together. >;))
First Ninja on the other hand, is very much aware that for things to go this far means that he is absolutely having emotions about Chase. But he is also in denial, because how can he betray all of his moral standing and beliefs, if he starting to care about someone like Chase Young? So he shoves it so far deep, he is in denial about denial, and turns completely blind to anything even resembling them being something more than opponents who tentavely respect one another.
#que?#ninja showdown#my immortal soul#is it strange that out of those two i absolutely view Chase is the one who would voice out his wishes& feelings first#if only because Chase Young isn't one to deny himself things he really wants#(of course he has to realize that he wants them in that way first and that might take awhile)#and First Ninja is the one who WOULD deny himself anything just because it doesnt line up with his responsibilities and morals#even if he most likely will be the one to realize his emotions first. he also would have hard time believing sincerity of Chase's feelings#a very strange juxtaposition between the one who puts himself first and the one who never puts himself first#also not gonna lie. I wrote out. like several paragraphs about my headcanons about physical intimacy between those two &how they view it#but than I realized that its probably TMI for an anon ask that didnt ask for that xD so i decided not to subject you to my rants &deletedit#but still sorry
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Me: oh no, my stomach has been acting up a lot for 2 weeks already, and I have a trip to England in a few days... Google: You can't use Imodium for more than 48h!!! Me: Ah, shit. A literal shit! Me: Doctor, please, is there any medication for IBS? Doctor: No, unfortunately. Imodium typically helps. Me: I've been using it and it does help. How long can I use it in one go? Doctor: Up to 3 weeks. Here's a prescription for you. Just take less when your symptoms start to subside. Me: Oh heaven's bless QuQ
#if you don't know how it is to live with a stomach#which will shit out everything you put inside when the flaring happens#when eating ANYTHING is like playing Russian roulette with diarrhea#where you NEED TO go to a toilet in THAT INSTANT and not 5 minutes later#be SUPER HAPPY#this is a genetic family curse from both parents' side#this is what happens when your families live in the same fucking 200km area for at least 650 years#breeding with one another#I've been really stressed out lately with everything#with finances and the job#the company I work in has gone to bankruptcy and I'm pretty much waiting for them to kick me out#Patreon income has dried to 1/3 since I stopped drawing FUZZY#PMS isn't helping this at all#the IUD has been a blessing but it hasn't taken all of PMS away#which it apparently even doesn't do#tmi#niu's life#i need the new job#something where I can operate despite by diseases
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what does it say about sasuke or kishimoto as an author that the image of sasuke being lovey-dovey with sakura or even karin is so contradictory to his character... yet the image of him and naruto being exactly that is somehow the most natural conclusion for these two...
#idk man i just think it's funny that#even casual audience might have a hard time thinking of sasuke as the boring straight man#because he really isn't#everything about him in boruto feels distant yet the only time i thought#'ah that's the sasuke i know!'#is when he's in a battle together with naruto#so... really what's the message kishimoto is giving here#because it feels like he is saying 'some people are not made for marriage but i don't have enough fucks to give about these two'#honestly i just feel bad for sakura she really don't deserve to have this kind of... distant relationship with her husband#they really should get a divorce i think it'll make both of them and even sarada happier#tmi tag
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Something about those period product alternative posts that suggest cotton pads and period underwear with no mention of cups feels eerily like that old idea that "tampons are for whores because they break your virginity" but hidden behind the guise of natural alternatives and feminine health
#hot take#period stuff#tmi#it's just really weird to me - convenient even - that the chemical free alt to tampons isn't mentioned 👀#WEIRD
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hey an effect of HRT that I've noticed in myself that I've never seen anyone mention: the like little tiny bumpy bits around the areola? the baby saliva-reading texture (or so I've heard)? gone. my nipples are. So smooth.
#aside from the gigantic mole that looks like a third one but dw I've had it looked at and it isn't anything#it's just really ugly and makes me sad#anyway. smooth nipples! no more breast feeding sensors.#jack facts#hrt#ftm hrt#transmasc#medical#tmi#i guess. if you don't want to hear about my beautiful shark-smooth nipples.
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the comments on my fics are some of the only things holding me together rn
#grammar? i hardly know her#The Author Of This Text Post Has Chosen Not To Use Archive Warnings#i still have my kidney stone i am suffering from the side effects of the flowmax i was prescribed i am sick bc my sister coughed in my#face last week when i was bathing her my period just started i am jobless and i'm on the last crumbs of my savings which are currently bein#eaten by medical bills i likely have to move the rent is being increased by $300 bc the landlord is a pos both sides of my family are strug#and i'm anxious about other family/health stuff and my friend is having a Really bad time and there's nothing i can do to help them and#i'll stop there i've already overshared enough#negative /#complaining /#period mention /#tmi /#fuck if i move out of state what am i gonna do about my credits i was gonna try and take the last few courses to finish my degree#....................#the reason i didn't do it this year was bc i couldn't afford it hahfhdshcfdfggfbfggffg...........#rip i guess haha ..................#i have some appointments w new drs next month and i hope i can pay the copay at each of them. it's literally $4....... yet i........#and i need to see some other ones too bc there r too many things wrong w me apparently. cool#life isn't that great rn but i will figure it out eventually#or maybe i won't#whatever i guess#opening the fic comments again i need to feel soemthign that isn't shitty feelings#scarlett.txt
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[The one thing I think I disagree with strongly is that HUNK is "unhygienic".
While I agree in missions he probably doesn't always have many choices - he can't just take his gear off and clean off if he's surrounded by monster: but I do think that he does his best with the circumstances that he has.
At the very least he wipes himself off with those lil personal wet wipe packets or does a bird bath if he can find a sink.
But in cases where he's got access to soap and running water + doesn't have to worry about a zombie eating his ass while he's in the shower? Dear lord, imo he's probably bordering on excessive when it comes to the way he'd clean himself.
He also likely doesn't smell "good" in the sense that he uses heavy scents for washing or as a deodorant. I actually think HUNK in ideal/less stressful circumstances doesn't really HAVE a smell. He'd more likely use harsh antibacterial soaps rather than scented ones and doesn't cross me as the kind of person who bothers with buying expensive cologne.]
#- - [ooc]#- - [hcs]#tmi tw#gross tw#[Tbh my HUNK also had a serious illness as a child]#[Which would have forced him to really learn the art of keeping his body sterile and CLEAN to avoid infection]#[So many fans just look at him in 4th survivor and assume he's just nasty 24/7]#[But that's literally him having the WORST week of his life]#[That isn't him every day]
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,
#body talk#tw tmi#complaining (tm)#im on lithium but also on two meds w appetite suppressants and my bmi is dipping fast as fuck#i can't eat when im anxious anymore lol#im not like..... dangerously thin i think? like i've always had a small frame so i don't look emaciated#and ik bmi isn't an accurate measure of health. but mine is 16.3 and dropping. which is a little worrisome#i haven't been doing much so im really shaky and i get tired super easy now and im not sure if that's bc of the weight or not#im the thinnest ive been since my mom started really trying to get me to gain in elementary school#and im afraid that bc of ballet i attach more importance to it than it deserves........#hopefully i can build some muscle once i get back on campus and start walking everywhere#anyways
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TMI TUESDAY:
[How/where] did you meet your partner? He sounds like a wonderful person!
[genuine]
He is truly an amazing man, and I always wanted him to find the happiness that he so deserved. Just never figured I'd factor into that someday haha! Building a relationship off of a real friendship is not something I've ever done, but it's made it so easy tbh? We already had this foundation of trust, and a deep understanding of what each other had gone through and was actively looking for. I'm so excited for the future with him by my side 💕
#tmi tuesday#mod doodles#Oh gosh got mushy there#Woops sometimes I just get really excited about love#Isn't that freaking wild
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tfw you go off of your PPI agent medication to see if your body can learn to be Normal and then during the taper-off course of meds your bowels go back to being wildly unpredictable and then 24 hours after the last taper med you have diarrhea after being constipated earlier in the week 🥰
#my tummy doctor was like 'idk if your body specifically CAN be normal but you're welcome to try' and then he refilled my PPI agent...#...med so i can go back on it without an appointment if my bowels go back to shit and. well.#my bowels were already mad at me and back to My Normal (which is Not Normal) during the fucking TAPER-OFF MEDS (a 3 week process)#like. no. my body absolutely CANNOT be normal i fucking guess 🙄#at least the cramps have been really mild#i haven't had the Poop Chills for months#but GODDAMN. CAN WE CHILL???????#so I'm gonna give it a month and see if my digestive system can level itself out but. i'll probably have to go back on the meds.#which like. isn't a problem except that i have to pay for them and i have to take them in the morning. and i HATE morning meds.#anyways#i love you my fellow ibs and acid reflux girlies we can make it through 💪#personal#tmi#gross#poop tw#feces tw#diarrhea#constipation#ibs
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what makes vash's pacifist way of life very commendable in the narrative is how despite this belief, he still understands that not everyone who pull the trigger do so solely for harm, but also for self-defense
he understands that love and peace can't fix everything, that it is natural for people to harm others who have harmed them
i love that way of showing that kindness is not the same as naivety, but a choice that him and so many others actively have to choose in this very cruel system
#this is why i don't really like the interpretation that vash is naive for not wanting to kill#its not a weakness nor him naively believing that humanity is 100% kind#he has experienced life longer than many other people in NL#he had seen just how easy it is for people to resort to cruelty#but he also have witnessed the kindness that many people gives to others despite the tough times and circumstances#the world isn't completely black or white#we're just as capable to inflict violence as we are to choose to be kind to others#the choice is in our hands but it also depends on the circumstances#people who hurt others aren't always a bad or evil person#okay i kinda derail there a bit but trimax did that for me#trigun maximum#tmi tag
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Someone said my work is "quality" u//////u
#rambles#i shouldn't be typing this in the tags but like.....#it's hard for me to consider the fact that people follow my writing blog because they like my writing#my assumption is that majority of the notes on my posts are purely from people using the search function#not my followers#like people don't follow me for my writing but because they want genshin content#which honestly i have no beef with that mindset at all#but when people comment on things like the quality of my writing it's like.....#'oh you're following me for me'#it's extremely flattering#it's this sudden realization that i exist#i'm being seen#does that make sense?#i have this strong innate urge to always see myself as a wallflower#someone that doesn't stand out or is noticed#but people always prove me wrong because they will see me and know me#they will treat me with warmth i do not deserve and say kind things about me that i do not see in myself#and honestly i don't know what to think about that or how to even handle it#deep down i know i do stand out#i know that#but it's so hard for me to believe#tmi lol#like idk man maybe people are just really observant and their notice of me isn't a weird thing
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my poor body. she does not work so good
#you don't. have to read all these tags. in fact i don't think you should tbh i'm just writing in my diary here. getting very tmi in here rn#i wanna talk about me#gonna try and see if i can get an appt with a new doc tomorrow#because as much as i want to see ANOTHER doctor like i want a hole in my head. i and my mom think it would be good#to see an internist for some more personalized care for my Horrors#cause y'know. i've been pretty happy with my endo for a while now but i just haven't had any improved results in a year or two from them#and their advice is just always. diet and exercise diet and exercise diet and exercise#which is vague and impersonal and unhelpful#it's frustrating. i just want someone to tell me what's going on and how and why we're doing what we're doing#i don't need to be skinny (i'm never gonna be skinny.) i don't need to be an athlete#i just want to feel okay and make sure my body isn't going to poison itself over time#well anyway. hoping i can make a first appointment within the next couple of months#i'm seeing my new obgyn next month...will definitely be asking about my hospital visit yesterday.#i know ovarian cysts can happen and rupture in anyone and aren't necessarily correlated to pcos but#knowing i've got the latter makes me really nervous about the former happening again#and if it happened while i'm already being treated. i think it might be time for a change of treatment...
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Imagine being so insecure in your own identity that you start literally gatekeeping your gender
#lol i woke up today and my aunty had made a post like#'I love trans people BUT if you're a trans woman then you're NOT a woman you are a TRANS woman'#'calling yourself a woman is INVALIDATING the IDENTITY of REAL WOMAN'#'i gave birth and breastfed my children bc I am a WOMAN and you didn't so you're a TRANS woman'#like girl both of those kids you birthed are trans and closeted#and they are rightfully afraid to tell you because they know you'll react poorly#this is not the boast you think it is#it's just transphobic LMAO#cw transphobia#also to my friends dw this isn't one of the aunties you always hear me talk about#although one of them is a jk rowling apologist and the other is. well. interesting.#but they're both good trans allies#we have a family 'girls only' group chat we use mostly for discussing periods and tmi pregnancy stuff etc#anything we don't want the guys to see really#and as soon as they found out my sister was trans they added her to that gc (AS THEY SHOULD!!)#anyway#yes I am one of those people who writes one line and then puts the entire rest of the post in the tags thank you for noticing#but yes I'll stop rambling now ty and goodbye
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I think it's really sweet that I get notifications lately about people liking my GoT fics because that fandom seriously put me through the wringer and all the overwrought tag policing (from fans screaming about a past relationship maybe being discussed at some point) is a key reason why I stopped writing in the first place.
Also, Jonerys fans literally scouring this blog for "proof" that I wasn't a completely straight cisgender female and threatening me if they found it (there's a lot of proof these days, gang, although if you know what my sexuality actually is at this point, feel free to inform the class....slightly bisexual ace? Uh, maybe) all because I told them it was out of line to explicitly threaten people over fanfic comments...let's just say, I stopped wanting to engage.
However, if people still like the fics, I do appreciate that.
#i mostly identify as a spinster#my libido isn't really dead i just have no interest in an actual personal life#which probably is not ace but some weird other thing#anyway sorry about the tmi
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Are you saying natalieironside has you blocked? That’s so funny and idk why
Yeah, iirc she actually used to follow me! But I made a comment on some post that I don't remember the details of but I remember part of my comment was "almost always", then natalieironside added on something essentially saying "it's not always like that", to which I responded with a screenshot of the thing I said in the first place and reiterating that I said "almost". Next thing I know her blog doesn't load for me & I can't like/reblog anything from her (which kinda sucks bc at least once a week I come across a post of hers that I get the urge to reblog)
#asks#anonymous#anon#on one hand yeah i can't really blame her i block ppl for being slightly annoying all the time#on the other hand GIRL IF YOU'RE A PUBLISHED AUTHOR HOW COME YOU CAN'T FUCKING READ#I PUT THE WORD ALMOST THERE FOR A REASON. IT MEANS SOMETHING. SO YEAH I KNOW THAT THING ISN'T ''ALWAYS'' THE CASE#(every time i see a post of hers that i wish to reblog my bitterness is renewed)#maybe i should just block her back so i don't have to see her posts all the time#tmi
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