#this is why i'm switching to globe

[kippilled]

How I be feeling rn

[babyouran]

The Twins Fight! - what started as a tricky game soon turns into a dramatic argument where the twins cause chaos in their fight against one another

pairing - fem!reader x host club

apart of - ouran add-in

"Let's all play the ‘Which one is Hikaru’ game!" The twins exclaimed, standing up while the ladies clapped at their announcement. "So, can you tell which one of us is Hikaru?"

"Well, it's hard to say," One lady began, tapping her finger against her chin.

"You're identical!" The other added.

"Many ladies have tried to tell us apart, but so far none have succeeded."

"Oh, they're playing that game again?" Y/n turned to Haruhi, the girls didn't have any customers at the moment. They were just enjoying the less busy crowd and chatting about a book Y/n read recently.

"It's kind of stupid," Haruhi expressed.

"What? Have you got a problem with it, Haruhi?" They overheard her comment, turning to look at the two girls.

"No, it's just odd," She simply spoke, turning her attention back to Y/n.

"Hikaru! Kaoru!" Tamaki spoke, running in with a computer. "When I gave you control of the club's website, I did so on one condition. That you take it seriously!" Tamaki scolded them.

"We take our job very seriously boss," Hikaru responded.

"In fact, last night we worked on it till dawn," Kaoru added.

"Is this what you worked so hard to create?" He pulled up the screen, showing Y/n without her mask on and a shorter dress going up to her knees.

"Oh no," She stood up, grabbing onto the device to look at it. In response to seeing the less-than-accurate image, and realizing what lecture she would receive if her father saw such an image, she slumped to the ground. 

"You look great N/n-chan," Honey smiled.

"Pretty," Mori commented, and soon enough the girls were all surrounding the screen trying to catch a glance.

"There, there," Haruhi patted her back.

"My teeth don't look like that," Y/n pouted. "Also my lips are not- never mind. You have to take that down," She walked over to the twins flicking their foreheads. "Kyoya-senpai!" She yelled, wandering off from the mischievous duo.

"When did you take those photos of her?" Tamaki walked up to the twins.

"Didn't you hear her? We didn't," Hikaru explained.

"There is something called Photoshop, boss," Kaoru added.

"Can you do it with her wearing this?" Tamaki lifted a magazine where the main model was wearing a fancy green dress. 

"No," They deadpanned, walking away to leave a disappointed Tamaki. Instead, they decided to focus their attention back on Y/n who was arguing with Kyoya.

"I don't care if it got you more views on the website, if you don't want to be sued by my father take it down!" She stated, clearly frustrated and flustered trying to reason with Kyoya. In the presence of the twins, she switched her yelling onto them, taking the computer from Kyoya’s hands and motioning it to the boys. "Take it down," She pushed it in their hands.

"Why? It's fun. When we get bored we make fun."

"No," Y/n rolled her eyes, “This is not fun, this is bad!”

"You're our pet," Hikaru spoke, while Kaoru started working on getting rid of the photo.

"Be a good girl now," Kaoru looked up from over the screen.

"I'm not a dog. I can’t be both of your entertainment like this, you should go on and find a toy."

"You want a toy?" A dark figure appeared from behind a door, candlestick in hand. "Toys, toys. If you like toys then you should come and visit my Black Magic Club," The boy offered. This piqued Haruhi’s interest as she walked over to the mysterious figure to hear more about his offer. 

"We've recently opened a marketplace that hosts black magic items from across the globe. We're also holding mass around the clock. If you visit right now, I'll even throw in a free curse doll. You can have Belzenef as your gift."

"Why is he talking to us through a crack in the door?" Haruhi wondered, looking back at the fellow club members.

"Wait a second, has that door always been there?" The twins pondered.

"Nekozawa-senpai likes to hide. He doesn't care for brightly lit places," Kyoya informed the group.

"Don't get involved with that guy Y/n," Tamaki snuck up on her, scaring her. She jumped and flinched where she was standing. "If you do you'll end up being cursed, don't you do it either Haruhi!"

"How do you know?" Y/n asked, moving closer to the door, her arm was about to reach for the doorknob but Tamaki stepped forward to pull her arm back so that she was standing next to her. 

"It happened during final exams, at the end of the last school year," Tamaki let go of her wrist since she was trying to shake her hand out of it. He then went on to explain a story where he stepped on a 'cursed' doll, leading to him taking a test in different lettering and he also didn't know any of the students in that class. "I was in a different dimension."

"Scary!" Honey cowered.

"Did that really happen to you?" Haruhi questioned, unsure, trying to hide behind the shorter boy. Y/n walked over to the nervous Honey, bending down a bit and patting his head in a comforting way.

"Don't you worry Honey-senpai, or you either Haruhi-chan. I think Tamaki-senpai just went to the wrong class," Y/n explained while Honey was hugging her. 

"It was a curse! I know because I woke up three days later and my legs were as heavy as lead!" Tamaki fired back.

"Your legs were heavy because you ran a marathon the day before, remember?" Kyoya told him, still working on his normal tasks despite the new presence of the man. 

"You shouldn't underestimate the dark powers of Belzenef the cursed doll. All you have to do is write the name of someone you hate on his back and then that someone will come into misfortune," Nekozawa popped up, holding the cat doll.

"Wow this guy is dark in more ways than one," Kaoru spoke, and soon he and Hikaru exchanged a glance.

"I wonder what he will think of this," Hikaru showed the flashlight from behind his back before shining it on Tamaki and Nekozawa. Both of them ran away scared, Nekozawa choosing to retreat to his club room.

"How on earth could you two do such a thing? Obviously, the two of you don't know the true terror of the black mirror!" Tamaki shook, but this wasn’t anything the twins paid much attention to, instead just wandering off with complaints that they were bored.

"My dignity as the club's leader is being ignored," Tamaki sulked in his spot. 

"Hey, Y/n! We have a favor to ask you," The twins spoke.

"What’s that?" Y/n responded, going over to her bag to search for a new book.

"Can we go to your house?"

"No."

"That could be fun," Tamaki looked up.

"No, it wouldn't. My house is almost the same as yours, it would be different if we were going to Haruhi's, that could be fun," Y/n shrugged, finding her book and taking a seat. Soon enough the twins were standing around Haruhi, hopeful eyes looking upon her. 

"No, you're just going to make fun of it," She shook her head, crossing her arms in distaste. 

"I think it's about time we all pay our respects to our beloved Haruhi's family!" Tamaki beamed.

"No way in hell, only Y/n can," Haruhi mumbled the last part, looking over at the girl reading intently.

"We can settle this with a game! If you can't pick out which one of us is Hikaru, then your penalty will be the two of us coming over to your house later tonight!"

"It's kind of simple," Y/n commented. "That's Hikaru and that's Kaoru," She pointed to the boys.

"You're wrong."

"No she's right," Haruhi agreed.

"Sure you guys look alike, but that doesn't mean your personalities are the same," Y/n mentioned. 

"How did you tell?" One of the girls asked.

"With that hat, it's so hard," Another wondered, Y/n ignored the words of the girls since the book once again captured her interest which made Haruhi have to answer the question. 

"Well, how do I put it? It's kinda difficult to explain. But Hiakru's speech and actions make him come across a little more mischievous than Kaoru," Haruhi explained honestly, not truly thinking about her words before speaking them.

"I'm sorry Hikaru, I don't mean to laugh," Kaoru spoke, trying to hold back a laugh but soon ended up breaking into a loud one.

"I don't see what's so funny. I'm honest, I speak my mind, and I don't hold back. It's sneaky people like Kaoru who are the troublemakers," Hikaru argued.

"Don't turn this on me, Hikaru. After all, I'm the one who's always going along with all of your selfish games.”

"I may suggest them but you're the one that gets into them Kaoru. If you hate it so much then why don't you just stop?"

"Because I'd hate to see you make an ass out of yourself, in front of everyone. It was your idea to call Y/n a pet, but I noticed you were quick to make a pass at her. Admit it, Hikaru, you're actually in love with Y/n, aren't you?" Karou smugly spoke, Hikaru getting all flustered.

"You've got it all wrong, Kaoru! Man, you're such a freaking idiot," Hikaru told him annoyed.

"Yeah! There are some things in this world that must never be said," Tamaki buzzed.

"Why would I fall for her? I mean she can't even show her face, she probably looks like a tanuki," Hikaru claimed.

"How dare you call her a raccoon dog?" Tamaki fumed. "You're going to pay for that!"

"Can you guys be quiet-" Y/n tried to speak before a large rumbling cut her off. 

Soon enough Renge made another surprise appearance and started to emerge from the ground. "Our beloved Y/n is in the middle of a beautiful yet poignant seven-sided romantic relationship! And to make it even better, two of her admirers are twins, torn apart by love! Just the thought of it could make me eat three bowls of rice!”

"Wait, what did you-"

"Oh butt out, otaku," The twins spoke causing a total flip in Renge’s confidence as she now stepped down from the platform all sad.

"You guys are meanies! You shouldn't say something like that to your manager!"

"But Renge, I thought you had feelings for Y/n as well.”

"I do and it's platonic, but I have no problem with her having relationships on the side. Also after speaking with Haruhi, I'm developing feelings for him as well," Renge announced back to her confident self.

"I'm confused, I thought you had decided to go back to France, Renge," Haruhi walked over.

"Well, I was going to start up a host club of my own… but, I don't think France is ready for a host club, just yet," She told Haruhi, a light blush on her cheeks.

"I don't think anywhere is ever ready for a host club," Y/n commented, Renge was about to mention something else but was cut off by the twins' voices raging at one another. 

"Cut it out already! You're the one always crawling into my bed! Talk about annoying," Kaoru yelled.

"I only do that because you look lonely. I wouldn't choose to sleep in your bed, you idiot!"

"Who are you calling an idiot? You're the one who sucks at math."

"Oh yeah, well you're failing your foreign language class you dummy," Hikaru argued, just continuing to go back and forth like little children.

"That's it we're over!" They fumed, walking in opposite directions of one another, stomping off into the distance. 

Later the next day Haruhi and Y/n were sitting beside each other in class chatting before it began.

"What did you think of the fourth chapter?" Y/n asked her friend who was taking out her book.

"I didn't expect Tobio to show up especially him claiming he wanted his daughter back," Haruhi spoke excitedly.

"Hey Y/n, Haruhi!" One twin walked in, flamingo pink hair. "Good morning.”

"Um, Hikaru," Y/n spoke, squinting her eyes in disbelief at what she was seeing. "What did you do to your hair?"

"Why is it dyed pink?" Haruhi wondered.

"Because pink suits me. Don't you think it's cute? From now on I'm the pink-haired twin. I didn't want to be mistaken for that Kaoru for the rest of my life, you know?" Hikaru mentioned, his now blue-haired brother, coming up next to him.

"Good morning Y/n, Haruhi," Kaoru voiced, Hikaru, walked over to an empty seat near Y/n and sat beside her. "I was finally able to sleep all by myself last night, but I ended up having a nightmare. I dreamt my stylist had dyed my hair pink. It was so garish and ridiculous looking, I woke up screaming.”

Hikaru stood up and walked over kicking Kaoru's chair so that he fell. Kaoru then returned the favor, knocking Hikaru down the same way. Once back to their seats, the twins stared at each other and soon enough an all-out war erupted with a multitude of items being flung over Haruhi and Y/n’s heads. 

"This is going to be a long day," Y/n grumbled as Haruhi nodded in agreement.

When class was over and it was noontime Haruhi and Y/n decided to chat about the lesson they had just finished learning while walking into the cafeteria. 

"I was wondering what all the fuss was about, I can't believe the two of you are still fighting," Tamaki spoke, watching the twins in line arguing about food.  "You're a disgrace to the Host Club!"

"Why is the rest of the club here?" Y/n questioned, turning to Haruhi. Haruhi just shrugged and let Y/n wander over to the group. "Hey guys!"

"N/n-chan!" Honey exclaimed.

"Hey, look who it is!" A short-haired girl spoke, joining hands with another.

"I've never seen them all together like that," Another one commented.

"We've had enough of this, you're both to blame for this fight," Honey said, then pulling out a cake. "Hika-chan and Kao-chan I want you to make up and then go halfsies on this cake, 'kay? But I want to have a piece too, and N/n-chan should get some, so I guess we're gonna have to have fourthsies," Honey went on babbling in an attempt to try and figure out how to cut the cake.

Y/n just walked over to the nox distressed and anxious boy, lifting him, and taking him over to Mori. 

"You're just making it worse, leave them alone," Mori told Honey, moving him far away from the irritated twins.

"Oh, Y/n! I didn't expect to run into you in the dining hall," Tamaki fangirled, rushing over to the girl who was watching Honey now munching on the cake he was once going to share.

"Haruhi and I decided to follow the twins here, they have been acting odd all day," Y/n looked over to her senpai. 

"I brought a boxed lunch and I just wanted to eat it in the classroom," Haruhi mumbled, walking over to where the host club now decided to eat lunch. 

"A boxed lunch?" Tamaki repeated.

In Tamaki's head

"Tamaki, darling, I hope you will accept this food I made. I'm not amazing at cooking, but I made it with love!"

"I will eat anything you make Y/n, it's always beautiful and tastes delicious," Tamaki declared 

"I will eat it!" Tamaki spoke out loud.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Kyoya mumbled.

"Ah," Y/n ordered beside Kyoya, pointing out the dish of her choice

"Our chef makes amazing crab, it truly is so delicious the way he seasons it. Maybe once you can come visit and try the dish," Kyoya mentioned, the two walking towards the lunch table that the Host Club members were currently occupying.

"Damn rich people," Haruhi grumbled.

"Haruhi, come sit over here!" Y/n waved her over, but instead of just Haruhi another friend had joined alongside them, Hikaru.

"What's that, what do you have for lunch?" He questioned, watching Haruhi take her seat.

"Yesterday's leftovers, and a rolled omelet,"

"Haruhi you want to switch?" Y/n looked over at the mouthwatering expression on Haruhi’s face as she stared at Y/n’s food. With a happy nod, the two exchanged their meals.

"This is amazing!" Haruhi exclaimed, tasting the food.

"Great! I usually like to eat more in private, so I can just save yours for later!"

"Y/n, I got a meal that you’ll enjoy. Want to try it, all you have to do is take your mask off," Kaoru softly grabbed her chin, tugging it closer towards him with one hand while his other held a fork with a piece of his meal on it.

Hikaru chomped the food off of the fork instead of the intended recipient, "Quit butting in Kaoru." At the possibility of another fight, Y/n moved out of her seat and grabbed Haruhi's hand to take her with her. Just as they were out of the line of fire Kaoru threw his soup at his twin but missed the wanted target and instead, it got splashed all over Tamaki. 

"I'm going to go eat alone now," Y/n quietly muttered over the yelling of the twins, choosing to take her leave from the noisy group.

After the whole cafeteria incident, the group (excluding the twins) met up again in the club room, hoping to relax with some tea and discuss the problematic antics of the twins.

"Looking at the numbers, if this situation isn't resolved, I'm afraid we're going to have to stop offering our brotherly love package. We're down one pair of loving brothers," Kyoya announced, typing in some digits into his calculator. "Oh, Haruhi, I just want you to know there's no reason for you to feel responsible, even though it was your tactless comment that started this whole feud between the twins."

"It's weird for Hika-chan and Kao-chan to be fighting like this," Honey spoke, playing with Usa-chan. "It's never happened before."

"They have never fought before?" Haruhi pondered, looking over at Honey.

"I've known Hika-chan and Kao-chan since we were in preschool. We weren't in the same year so I never really got to talk to them, but I remember that the two of them always played together," He told the group.

"Yeah that's true, I mean I've only known the twins since middle school but they have always stood out," Tamaki added, he went on about how the twins had been together for a while, saying it might not be such a bad thing they are fighting.

Yet quickly his former opinion changed when the twins finally arrived and they were still fighting, Tamaki quickly getting annoyed at the twins’ reckless behavior. 

"Don't you guys think it's maybe time to give up all this fighting?" Tamaki wondered. "It's driving me insane."

"What'd you say? It is driving you insane? You've got to be kidding me, how do you think I feel? Every time I look in the mirror I see his face. I'm sick and tired of being mistaken for you Kaoru! The truth is I hate your guts!" Hikaru snapped.

"You took the words right out of my mouth. In fact, I hate you so much, I bought this. Belzenef curse doll!" He pulled out the cat doll and a marker. "I'm going to complete the curse, Hikaru, I'm going to write your name on his back. From this day forward you are going to experience nothing, except misfortune and sorrow."

"Okay, this is getting to be enough," Y/n interrupted. "All because of some comment, that didn't even mean to offend you guys."

"Yes!" They both screamed. Mori rushed over to take Y/n’s hand in an attempt to bring her back into safety if they decided to start one of their throwing tantrums again. He did not want to see the girl getting injured once again. 

Haruhi finally had it, truly annoyed at the way they were treating her friend and how stupid they were being about an argument that didn’t make much sense. They were acting like toddlers. 

"Will you guys knock it off?" She smacked the sides of their heads. "What do you think you're doing? You don't bring something like this into a petty fight,” she motioned to Belzenef, “Both of you are at fault here, but what is truly sad is that you're bringing everyone else into your big mess! Now apologize to each other, if you don't make up right now I'm never going to let you come over to my house!" Haruhi threatened.

"So, then what you're saying Haruhi is that if we make up, we can come to your place?" The twins questioned at the same time.

"Oh, no," Y/n whispered, slapping her forehead, she figured out the mischievous plan they were trying to hatch all along. Haruhi slowly turned the doll around just for it to be blank, her face dropping in fear.

"I'm so sorry Kaoru, even though I was just following our script I said such awful things to you. I'm not fit to be your brother," Hikaru apologized.

"Don't say that Hikaru! I was so worried, I couldn't live with myself if I ever thought I had hurt you," They embraced each other, repeating apologies.

"You've got to be kidding! You mean you guys were faking it this whole time?" Honey shouted, arms flaring above his head.

"We didn't have anything else to do, we were bored!" They told him, laughing with each other. Haruhi was now sulking to the ground where Y/n moved in attempts to try and comfort her.

"Twins with too much time on their hands, are the devil," Tamaki concluded.

Later on the next day, the club was back to running like normal, with no obnoxious feuds between the twins but instead back to their game.

"Okay, it's time to play the ‘Which one is Hikaru’ game!" The boys announced.

"I know," A girl with short hair raised her hand. "The twin with the pink hair is Hikaru!"

"We have a winner!"

"So, are you two going to keep your wild hair color even though you made up? It's much easier to tell the two of you apart now," A girl with longer hair spoke.

"Not really," Y/n sighed, sitting up in her seat where she was eating cake with Honey. "The blue is Hikaru and the pink is Kaoru, they switched for the day," She then continued back with munching on the sweet treat while the twins stared in astonishment. 

"Do you realize what happened Hikaru? Until now, there were only two groups of people, 'us' and 'everyone else'. But for the first time, someone's crossed into our world."

next chapter - The Grade School Host is the Naughty Type!

[danieyells]

After Hotaburi's chapter i was very curious about Zenji voicelines! Can i ask for them, please?

@yuri-is-online YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT OVERWHELMING ME although I appreciate the concern!! If I get overwhelmed or need a break I just put it aside until I'm ready or have the time and energy and attention span or ideas if necessary haha so no need to worry there 'u' (Also. . .good luck with those fics lolol)

ZENJI IS OUR LAST BOI. Until we get Ed and Lyca anyway. Which will honestly probably be in like. A week or two. Possibly less. I had my suspicions when I first read his that he was a ghost lol knowing he is. . .it gives them a little different feeling I guess haha.

Hello: (the first time the game is opened after that character is set as home screen NPC. Only happens once per day, unless the character is switched out and back.)

"Why, hello there, my dear. Suppose we kick off another swanky day here?"

You've Got Mail: (whenever there's something in the inbox, usually Arena rewards)

"Come now, read those messages out, won't you? They're fan letters for me, aren't they? ...They're not?"

Default: (requires no affinity, has no time constraints)

"You want to know the meaning of my words? I see— I'll have to give you a lecture on romanticism."

"What's this? Well, it's a biwa, of course. It's a biwa just as you are yourself."

what does that mean tho. . .i mean i get what it means but also it feels like it must mean something. . . .

"Girls, be ambitious... Dream big, my dear."

proud women enjoyer zenji kotodama

"A man who's everywhere but can be found nowhere... That's what it means to be an inspired man of the quill."

i think that's just what it means to be a ghost bby. . . . . . . . . . .

"Heh. There's no doubt about it. Zenji Kotodama is once again the most styling man on campus. These glad rags are the cat's pajamas."

Affinity 1: (between 5am and 11am)

"Come now, let's depart in search of something sensational."

Affinity 2: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Oh, have you come to see me? This is troubling. I'm afraid I'm out of autographs."

where have you been distributing them. . .?

Affinity 3: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"What am I doing here? ...I'm people-watching."

Affinity 4: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Ordinarily I ask for write-ins for my advice salon on the World Wide Web...but tonight, I'm taking it out into the field."

i wonder if he's waiting to encounter people who'll be able to see and hear him or if he's just like. . .genuinely ignoring/forgetting/disregarding that he isn't seen or heard. . .or maybe he was ignored a lot in his lifetime too so he doesn't question that people don't respond. . . .

Affinity 5: (between 8pm and 5am)

"The moon is beautiful... I always look forward to passing the hours in conversation with you and Towa on nights like these."

i thought you didn't hang around jabberwock after dark because the dark was dangerous tho. . .maybe if the moon is big and bright he doesn't mind because it's not as dark lolol

Affinity 6: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"My folktale videos? I filmed them at Haku's behest, but I can't imagine these old things will capture my fans' hearts..."

based on that the Urashima Taro video has his voice in it but his character story recording doesn't have him or his voice in it(and Haku deliberately tries to make the background interesting because he knows it'll only be the background and biwa sounds,) I think his voice can be recorded but if he's visibly in the recording it won't be captured? That or Haku has recording equipment that can capture ghost voices, but not images???

Affinity 7: (between 11am and 4pm)

"It truly is the age of YouTube. Can you fathom the romance of my artistry spreading to all four corners of the globe?"

Affinity 8: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Every tool has its own knack you've got to acquire to use it properly. Behold— my mastery with a fishing pole!"

Affinity 9: (between 8pm and 5am)

"This doll here is special. The moment I met him I felt a destiny such that I knew we couldn't be strangers."

Affinity 10: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Oh, I didn't mean to give you a fright... I ought to have expected this. A sudden brush with an inspired man of the quill would take anyone's breath away."

Affinity 11: (between 5am and 11am)

"Have you got any siblings, my dear? Why no, I don't mean anything by it. Just a little morning conversation."

i can imagine him looking fondly at his doll as he says he doesn't mean anything by it. His sibling isn't one of the most important things in the world to him or anything. He's just making conversation. btw in Japanese he says "morning talk" which sounds an awful lot like "pillow talk" to me and idk how many people would be comfortable discussing their siblings after the deed--

Affinity 12: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Are you going to Mortkranken, my dear? ...I see. No, I don't mean anything by it. Are you hurt? I hope you'll take care."

so while it makes sense for Zenji to ask this as he is noted in his profile to be a worrywart, not to mention he died on campus, but also. . .y'know, his brother lives there.

Affinity 13: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to sneak up on you. Apparently my footsteps give the general students the heebie-jeebies..."

In Japanese it does clarify that he moves without the sound of footsteps at all because the general students freak out hearing his footsteps since they can't see him

Affinity 14: (between 5am and 11am)

"A swanky morning calls for a swanky breakfast, and some swanky radio calisthenics."

apparently radio calisthenics are still pretty popular in japan. in any case man are you sure you died like a year ago you sound so old

Affinity 15: (between 5am and 11am)

"Why, Subaru hasn't risen yet. Go ahead and wake him, won't you, my dear? I'll accompany your efforts from here with my biwa."

Affinity 16: (between 11am and 4pm)

"A burst of inspiration has taken hold of me... No. The ghost of artistry has possessed my soul!"

okay well be careful with ghosts taking over your soul you don't have a ton left if you lose that--

Affinity 17: (between 10pm and midnight)

"To be a Darkwick student is to greet danger as an old friend... But I hope that Haku and Subaru have a long life ahead of them."

Affinity 18: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Zenji Kotodama is a wonderful name, don't you think? A sensational name befitting of my sensational sensibilities."

Affinity 19: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Trouble sleeping? Then I'll read you a story. How about Urashima Taro?"

Affinity 20: (between 5am and 11am)

"I was standing by your pillow last night? Horsefeathers, I'd never. I was there the night before last."

BABY I DON'T THINK THAT'S BETTER. YOU ARE STILL WATCHING THEM SLEEP. WHAT ELSE DO YOU WATCH THEM DO.

Affinity 21: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Go ahead and eat. No, don't give me another thought—I'm on a diet, you see. Watching you is enough food for my soul."

you see why i suspected initially that he didn't know he was dead? can you eat at all buddy?? i don't think it's a diet if you've lost the ability to consume food. . . .

Affinity 22: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Haku's busy today—film me in his stead, won't you?"

Affinity 23: (between 8pm and 5am)

"I've got a little story about a hapless fool of a man... I'm sure it's hardly worth listening to. I wonder if I'll ever get the chance to share it with you?"

the true stories seem like the ones he wants to avoid. . .'a hapless fool of a man's story that isn't worth listening to but i'd still like to share' sounds an awful lot like it must be about him and his life. . . . In Japanese he says 「救いようのない、馬鹿な男の物語さ」 "it's the story of an irredeemable/hopeless, stupid man.". . .who did you hurt, Zenji?

Affinity 24: (between 10pm and midnight)

"To be able to look into your eyes and bid you good night... I'm the luckiest fella for miles around."

Affinity 25(max): (no time constraints)

"Maybe we did meet too late. But it's all right. I promise I'll find you in the next life."

but. . .but we have this life. . .although this is one of the few acknowledgements he really gives of his own ghostly nature. He wants to be able to live with you. To be tangibly there for you, to touch you and support you, to be able to show you off to others. . .but he can't be recognized. He can't be seen or heard but by a select few, it's only thanks to Haku that he can be seen or heard by you. It's too late for something 'real' now. So he can plan for the future. For the next life. He'll find you when you're both alive and then you can do everything you'd want to do with a real physical boyfriend. He promises.

Spring: (March-May) (between 5am and 11am)

"In spring, the dawn... Red tinges the slowly paling mountain rim... Ah... These mountain fellas must've been goofy for some doll..."

(between 11am and 4pm)

"There is hope buried under the cherry trees... It means that spring is the season of chance encounters."

isn't the like. rumor that cherry blossoms are pink because they dye their petals with the blood of corpses buried beneath them or something? i swear i read that somewhere. apparently it comes from a poem. is hope a body buried under a sakura tree. is that where they buried you, Zenji?

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"The cherry blossoms of Hotarubi are ephemeral—they bloom only to be quickly washed away by the rain. But I am rather fond of that way of life."

Zenji simultaneously lives in Acceptance and Denial stages of grief it seems lol

(between 8pm and 5am)

"The beauty of the cherry blossoms under the night sky inspired me to pick up my pen... Oh, it has gotten easier to lift."

Summer: (June-August) (between 5am and 11am)

"Have you seen him!? Who? Why, my doll, of course! This is very troubling. I've got to find him before the boogeymen stir!"

. . .somehow this reminds me of the Jiro dialogue where he's like "if Yuri asks where I am, tell him i went to bed, i'm going out" lol if the doll reminds him of Jiro, it seems to make sense that now and then it wanders off on its own. I wonder where it's going though?

(between 11am and 4pm)

"My ideal summer vacation? I wish to lay down my burdens in the springs of Yugawara and pursue my wordsmithery in peace, as so many greats have done before me."

Yugawara is a hot spring town in Japan! Apparently since the Meiji era people would go there for inspiration and such thanks to the atmosphere

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"This master wordsmith studied by the light of fireflies... I see. Haku! Turn out the lights!"

(between 8pm and 5am)

"I heard a frightful rumor... Apparently the ghost of a dead student has been spotted around Hotarubi..."

THAT'S YOU. YOU ARE THE SCARY GHOST OF A DEAD STUDENT. PEOPLE CAN SEE YOU MORE BECAUSE IT'S SUMMER.

Autumn: (September-November) (between 5am and 11am)

"Fall is the perfect season for a new book, and I have the perfect one for you... From inspired man of the quill Zenji Kotodama, the fruit of his sweat and blood... "Body.""

(between 11am and 4pm)

"A song for you in the season of the arts... From inspired lute priest Zenji Kotod— Wait, where are you going!?"

why is this the one time 'biwa' is translated to 'lute' lol. . .although 'lute priest' does sound way better than 'biwa priest'

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Gauging the literary significance of this video by something as insignificant as views... Horsefeathers, isn't it?"

yeah!!! don't judge your worth by views or follows, zenji!!!

(between 8pm and 5am)

"I've decided to make you the heroine of my next work... A beautiful princess who bites into a poisoned apple and falls into a deep slumber... and seven of you!"

a fascinating retelling of Snow White. . .Snow White And The Seven Snow Whites. . . .

Winter: (December-February) (between 5am and 11am)

"Good morning, fellas! Time for my biwa recital to color the chill of this frigid sunrise! I call it "Six O'Clock in the Morning.""

zenji nO PEOPLE ARE TRYNA SLEEP

(between 11am and 4pm)

"There's a rumor going around that you can hear a biwa playing in the music room when no one's there... I go all the time though, and I've never heard it..."

again. . .that's because it's you. . . .

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"The setting sun... The sky dyed purple... Your beautiful profile, obscured... (gasp) I've been struck by inspiration!! My dear, I have to leave you here!"

(between 8pm and 5am)

"Are you cold? Then let me warm you up... My dear, why are you scooting away? I'll only make you colder...?"

it really seems like he forgets he's a ghost pretty often lmao

His birthday: (June 19th)

"Is this...a birthday present...? (hic) (sob) I'm the luckiest fella around...!"

people don't give him gifts often huh. . .or he's just very emotional. both could be true.

Your birthday:

"I've planned the perfect day to celebrate the miracle of your birth... We'll start with an ode to you, accompanied by my biwa."

he planned you a whole outing or maybe a party! with all day musical accompaniment!! What a sweetheart!!

New Years: (January 1st)

"Happy New Year, my dear. I'll be making the first shrine visit with Haku—care to join us?"

Valentine's Day: (February 14th)

"My dear...is this for me? (hic) (sob) I'll treasure it always...!"

well given he probably can't eat it. . .fair reaction

White Day: (March 14th)

"I'm sorry... I did try to explain that a biwa recital would make a better gift, but Haku insisted I present you with confections instead..."

thanks haku you a real one lmao although music wouldn't be bad just. . . .

April Fool's Day: (April 1st)

"No, I would never lie to you. An inspired man spins fiction with his quill, not his mouth, after all."

y'know, i love the honesty! you keep making stories and being open, zenji!

Halloween: (October 31st)

"Why, you gave me quite a fright in that getup! What a marvelously queer celebration this is! So this is the legacy of westernization..."

no the marvelously queer celebrations are in june. although halloween is also marvelously queer sometimes--

Christmas: (December 25th)

"Merry Christmas! I've completed a new fairy tale. May my wishes reach the hearts of children everywhere..."

not a gift for you, but for the children! can a ghoul ghost and a human have--

Idle: (about 20 seconds without interacting with the game) (below 13 affinity)

"...And they lived happily ever after. How did you like my new story? I'd love to hear your— What? You weren't listening!?"

(13 affinity and above)

"Can you see me? Phew... You've been so quiet, you had me worried, my dear."

Absent: (logging in for the first time in 2 or more days?)

"Ah, I'm so relieved you're all right, my dear. I wondered if something had happened on a mission... I'm glad my fears had no teeth."

THAT'S ALL OF EM. He's really. . .he is himself the whole way through huh lol. At the same time when he does acknowledge his ghostliness(and oftentimes he does the exact opposite, simply lacking in self-awareness) he seems a little lonely and regretful. . .I wonder if he was always such a worrywart or if he started worrying more after he died, realizing first hand just how dangerous things could be. I'm surprised how few acknowledgements his doll gets, although I don't think he carries it on the home screen?

I wonder how different his personality was when he was alive. Probably not very different tbh.

ANYWAY IT IS HALF PAST MIDNIGHT FOR ME. BEDTIME.

[sophieinwonderland]

I feel like using the DSM-5(-TR) (published by the american psychiatric association for 500 dollars per volume) instead of the ICD-11 (published by the world health organization for free) as the go-to source in system discourse sets up an unfair playing field in favour of sysmeds, on top of disadvantaging most non-american systems and any system without academic library access

the ICD correctly identifies that:

plurality can first appear at any age

does not remotely need to involve regular or even any switching (P-DID)

the traumagenic-endogenic distinction does not accurately represent the mechanics or needs of plural systems. clinical treatment should be provided based on distress, and disputes over the "validity" of certain systems can only hurt

combining the last two points - the differences between a p-did system, a spiritual system and a tulpa system break down when analysed as cognitive processes

that the association between childhood abuse or other extreme trauma and dissociative plurality does not account for all systems, even for all clinical systems

I'm not active in discourse, i want nothing less than to be so - but as someone who's simultaneously disenchanted with the field of psychopathology *and* wants to see it get better, i hope that people will look to more varied, more international, and more inclusive sources

Same! This is a really good point!

I think people need to be more conscious of how the American Psychiatric Association, even if it's taken small steps to be inclusive, is still the American Psychiatric Association.

It's still just made up of American doctors and consists of a very American perspective.

But humans exist around the globe, and an American perspective isn't enough.

I way too often see the World Health Organization's ICD-11 ignored in these discussions or at least treated as inferior resource, and I can't understand why other than ignorance.

[oneforthemunny]

6 - C - ?

#Roll game

back on my roll game shit lol. sorry everyone life beat the shit out of me but i'm back up now lol! for your roll- dom!eddie, touching toes, and belt <3

contains: minors dni, dom/sub themes, spanking w/ implement, slight voyeurism-ish??, all consensual.

"I'm not telling you again," Eddie growled, fingers fumbling with the intricate belt at his waist, two hand cuffs intertwined on the spiked leather. "Bend over and grab your ankles, or I'll make you pick a switch and do it out there instead. That what you want?"

Your body burned, cheeks flooding with embarrassed heat sending waves of heat crashing to your core. Your lips pressed in a hard line, looking towards the door, the buzz of the movie from downstairs slowly making its way upstairs.

Gareth had invited everyone over for a Halloween marathon before the new one came out. You'd been excited about it, so Eddie wasn't sure why you were so moody now. You'd woken up like that, huffy and snappy and mean. He'd warned you before you came, hoping his threats were enough to keep you in line, but they seemed to only make things worse.

Halfway through the second movie, you'd loudly announced your boredom with a groan. "Haven't you guys seen this before? Why are you rewatching it? That's so weird." The room shifted uncomfortably, all eyes on Eddie, who burned bright red, mortified at your loud declaration.

"She's kidding." Eddie said quickly, giving a forced smile that he hoped hid his embarrassment. "You're one to talk, baby, you do this all the time with Night Court."

You'd started to retort, an eye roll and a scoff, Eddie's hand squeezing your thigh harshly cut you off. You saw the anger in his eyes, sharp and daring, your tummy flipping with excitement, simmering into submission. Ten minutes later, he was hissing in your ear to go upstairs and wait for him.

"Hey," Eddie snapped, a brow lifted in rivaling challenge of your defiance, and pulling you out of your thoughts. "Look at me."

Your eyes met his in a furrowed, furious glare. "Is that what you want?" His arms crossed in front of his shirt, tighter fitting nowadays since he started working at the auto-shop part time.

"No," You muttered, looking down at your nails. "But I don't want you to do it here either."

"Should've thought of that before you acted like such a brat down there." Eddie shook his head, looking down the slope of his nose menacingly at you. He could tell by the way your thighs pressed together, shifting from one leg to the other, that wasn't entirely true.

"Hurry up, pull your shorts down and bend over. The longer you wait, the more people are going to get suspicious. Might just come up here and catch you like this." You shivered at the threat, a gush of excited wetness flooding between your legs, pushing your jean cutoffs to the ground.

Your shorts pooled at your ankles, body bent to grab at your calves, ass stuck out in the position Eddie desired. He hummed with satisfaction, the doubled up belt tapping over the globes of your ass in warning.

"I'm not doin' this long." Eddie muttered, the roaring hum of the suspenseful music rising up the stairs from the living room. Eddie pulled the belt back, sending it flying forward and striping across your ass with a firm snap.

You gasped, soft but enough that he heard it. The two of you pausing to see if the others did, but the movie continued on, so did the two of you. Eddie brought the belt down again, higher this time. Your nails dug into your calves, swallowing back a cry.

"You better keep your mouth shut for the rest of the night, you hear me?" Eddie growled, the belt cutting through the air with a whistle, a rather loud wallop of a smack landing across your flesh.

You whined, biting your tongue to keep your cries silent. The idea that the others might hear was both exciting and mortifying, left you aching with a need and burning with pleasure between your legs.

"I better not hear one," The belt swung back, hitting the space where your thighs met your ass.

"Single," Again, higher this time. You whined.

"Mean thing come outta that mouth." Two spanks, faster this time, a crescendo that had you lifting and lowers, trying to hold on and raise up all together.

"Or I'll take you home and cane you. Do you understand?" Eddie's voice was rough, firm with a threat that had you shuddering, excitement spilling down your spine, a blinding ache between your legs.

Eddie lifted the belt again, bringing it down with a hefty smack after your silence. "Understand?"

"Yes, yes," You panted, the blood beginning to rush to your head from the position, mind dizzying from the pleasure between your legs. "I-I won't. I promise."

Eddie seemed satisfied, pulling his belt back through his jeans. "Put your pants back on, and wait a minute before going down. Got it?" He watched you, giving you a nod before softly shutting the door.

You followed his instructions, brain a little foggy and a little needy after being left achy in so many ways. You contemplated slipping your hands between your thighs, finishing yourself off, but you knew that would only make it worse. You wanted to be good now, hoping that Eddie might be good to you later.

So instead, you walked back down the stairs on shaky legs, chin ducked to your chest hoping the others couldn't see your glass eyes, the secret shame on your cheeks. You winced when you settled back down beside Eddie, his arm wrapping around you, pulling you closer to him in a silent forgiveness, letting you curl into his chest for the rest of the night.

[writingoddess1125]

Blip on the Radar pt. 1

Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Reader + OOC Erik

Part 2 ->

Would appreciate a donation to my Ko-Fi so I can survive in this economy! Enjoy!

"Alright big guy bed time" You say as you swoop down and pick up your toddler, feeling him already tired from the day.

"No No Mama" Erik chimed. His mess of blonde hair covering his sleepy blue eyes which was trying to resist sleep

"Yes Yes Bean" You say with a giggle carrying him to his room and lay him down giving him his favorite stuffed bear you watch as he falls asleep in seconds.

Smiling as you watch his sleeping face and gently caress his cheek- despite the times that had passed you couldn't help but be amused by how much Erik didn't look like you, if it hadn't been for the 30hrs of labor you went through and seeing that headful of blonde hair when he was first born you would have been sure the hospital had switched your child.

He was a stocky and tall toddler, for being 2 years old he could easily be mistaken as a 3 year old- especially since he had big hands. He reminded you up a pitbull puppy, were you could see he was going to be a big boy.

Most likely like his father, which you assumed he was a carbon copy of.

It had been a bar hookup 3 years ago on a trip abroad, nothing special or unique in truth- You didn't even remember the guys name, you just remever his bright blue eyes, some blonde hair and a deep English accent. However that was about it- Besides you had your face in the pillows too much to know anyway, the next morning he had already been gone and you were content with that.

However seemed the universe decided to just screw you over as a few months later you found out you were pregnant. Not an ideal way to become a mother However you were one non the less.

Walking out of the room silently you began to pick up around the house, all Erik's toys and snacks he had dropped throughout the day but that was short lived as the couch called to you. Finally taking a seat you turn on some late night YV and sigh heavily- that exhaustion going through you as you laid there trying to will yourself to do more.

Going through your phone you see that you got a notification from Ancestory, raising a brow as you opened it and saw the results for your son upload.

"Oh yeah.. forgot about that"

A few weeks previously you'd done a DNA test on your son, mainly for medical history and to gather some basic information. As it populated you were met with pages of blacked our marker, Literally almost nothing was visible and you could see the British royal forces logo in the corner of most things but everything was crossed out.

"Why is so much of this crossed out?.." You muttered, squinting at the print on your phone over why so much information was limited from your sons father's side- You couldn't see much accept for last names and some general years.

"Weird.. Like a ghost... did I fuck a spy?-" You mutter, shrugging at this and close of your phone. Fairly sure you'd spooked yourself or that the Ancestory was wrong in some way. Waste of 90$-

0500 hr Other side of globe

It was far too early for this- Ms. Elis marched down the corridors of the Barracks with a file in her hand- her face no better then a thunderstorm as she marched.

Ghost could hear her from down the barracks hall from how loudly she was stomping around- he understood she was the TF 141 lawyer but she was a royal pain in the ass as well- he was seated on a couch of this temporary barracks common room and reading, dressed in more casual military attire and a plain balaclava covering his face.

"Price!" She called out once seeing him I'm his office and slamming the door behind her, Ghost looking up to see that banshee of a lawyer looking ready to snap again- sighing heavily as he tried to go back to reading.

"What do you think it's this time?" Soap said as he plopped himself next to the reading man with a relaxed sigh- Simon rolling his eyes at the Scotsman.

"Nothing that I'm willing to think about-" He grumbled, but his ear was picking up her yelling at Price dramtically- Once again. Banshee. That and one that had a flare for the dramatics.

After 10 minutes of this, The banshee of a lawyer stepped out of the office and turned to look right at Ghost-

"Mr. Riley, can you step into the office with us" She asked, a fake sweetness to her voice but he could hear the strain of frustration.

Fucking Hell...

Soap gave a crooked smile at the Lieutenant like a child pleased to see his peer being called in by the principal. Ghost silently stepped in and nodded at his Captian who gestured for him to take a seat.

Taking a seat he could see Price was on the brink of either snapping at the lawyer or getting a glass of scotch to dull whatever was happening.

"Sir" Ghost greeted Price but was giving a awkward nod- Clearly this not being something good.

"Well I never thought this would be a conversation I'd have but- Were you intimate with anyone in (insert location) around 3 years ago?" Price ask as calmly as possible- Clearly the lawyer keeping him from speaking in honest remark. Ghost felt a chill up his spin and his eyes narrowed.

"...What is this about Captian-" He asked sharply, Price grabbing two cigars and handing one to Ghost and keeping one himself.

"Well to be honest.. in short it looks like you have a kid Simon.. a little boy to be exact" Price said truthfully as the lawyer held the file out for Ghost. His eyes widened at hearing this, Looking slowly up at the lawyer as she handed him the file- Setting down the cigar quickly he opened it and saw the photos pulled from your Instagram as well as the ancestory website pages that did connect the toddler to him.

"It seems she was trying to get medical information through ancestory and we saw that your guys DNA connects. With the timing of the last time you were in that city it matches with the child's age" Ms. Elis said calmly as Ghost continued to look through the photos and information about you and his child.

"Simon?" Price said as he saw the man seemingly in a daze, staring at the folder. However Price could tell his mind was in a different place-

The lawyer was trying to go through options that Simon could take, paying child support, visitation, renouncing parental rights- However he was too dazed to even process any of this. Instead just sitting there thinking that he had a kid out there with this random stranger, were they a good mom? Did they love the kid? What if they were in a abusive home like he had been? Oh he couldn't let that happened.. it was be a nice snowy day in hell before he did. But also fear that his background would come to haunt him- How if he was in the kids life he could risk being a bad influence to the child as well.

Standing up suddently Simon held the folder looking to Price then the Laywer.

"What city are they located at Sir?-"

[inactivewattpadauthor]

Raiden x Reader: Plasma Ball

~~~~~~~~~~~~ The clock on the coffee table to your side read in bright red 5:13 p.m, and all you could hear outside is the light showering of rain.

That wasn't what stopped you from perhaps ordering a delivery, but maybe because you're aware of it being a frequent habit you spend money on, and rent was about due soon.

Resting your arm on the edge of your leather couch and placing your chin on your palm, you just looked around your living room, thinking of what to do to alleviate the burning boredom in your mind.

Television was of course an option, but there isn't any interesting show you could watch and you were procrastinating to catch up on the anime, overwhelmed how far you were behind with the six hundred episodes you at least had left. Shit, maybe more, the show never ended yet.  (Damnit, Oda.)

Eyes lowering to the game console below the TV, you thought about it, but that was also a no-go. Games aren't that fun anymore, especially if your internet pals got lives as well.

Last but not least, the bookshelf next to the TV stand. Immediate no.

But thinking of books, you looked to your right looking at your godly partner, his attention completely confiscated by the huge novel in his hands.

You couldn't help but gaze at his face, zoning out in thought. One could say you're admiring him. Though he wasn't a man of fun, you could interact with him and enjoy yourself.

Letting out a sigh, you waited for him to look at you and speak up. But the only movement from him was just him turning a page in the book. So, you tried again with a more forced one.

Yet, there was still no response from him, his faded eyes locked in the story. And you know he heard that one too.

"Raiden!" You yell, disliking not getting his attention.

"What is it, Y/n?" The Thunder Lord questions, not even looking at you.

Moving your body against his larger one, your head rubbing against his shoulder, you answered honestly with a soft utter. "I'm bored."

"Read a book." Was all he said, which makes you more frustrated. You groan and clung onto him more. "Pleaseee, why are you so boring?"

Raiden raises an eyebrow at you for a millisecond before going back to reading. "I'm not an entertainer."

You backed off a bit and thought what you could do to mess with him for a bit, and you got a good idea. A funny one that already made you snicker.

"Wait, I'll be right back!" Raiden looked at you confused, wondering what you thought was funny, or more so, what you were planning.

Jumping off the couch, you ran to your closet to dig for an item that you haven't seen in years.

The long white-haired man could hear you shuffling things around, items crashing on the floor, making you swear from your clumsiness. It didn't take too long for you to find the object you looked for, though.

Running back to the living room with a smile, Raiden sees you carrying some weird glass ball stuck to a small black stand. He could classify that it was something relevant to technology, as a black wired plug trailed behind you.

Carefully bending down to plug the device in beside the couch where he sits,  you chuckle and turn the device on, the center globe inside the glass glowing pink.

"Watch this." You smile and set the ball on the table before using your fingers to touch it, causing bright static lines to appear beneath the pads of your fingers.

Raiden watched with a blank look. Nevertheless, he was somewhat intrigued.

"I'm like you!" Your corny comment makes him give the typical unimpressed old man look on his face.

Another silly idea grew into your head and you looked at the switched-off lamp. You grabbed the shade off it before going back to the plasma ball, putting the shade on your head and touching the device again. It would seem Raiden knew where you were going with this.

Smirking with the conical pretended hat, you mimicked with a deep voice, "I mUsT cOnSuLt WiTh ThE eLdEr GoDs!"

After that, you just couldn't keep a straight face and burst with laughter. Laughing hard enough, you were snorting and not even making regular laughing noises, which makes yourself even more amused.

Raiden, on the other hand, got enough of your shit real quick and swiftly stood from the couch to remove the lampshade off your head. With one finger, he uses his power to send a brief shock to you, which makes your hair stand up and frizzy.

You shut up and stared at him with a taken aback look.

It was all in great fun. ~~~~~~~~~~~~

[alienpossession]

"Ahahaha, yeah sir, just trying to keep up with the role, you know? As you said it yourself, cannot let other people know that I'm not myself any longer so I just play pretend being this straight Korean prick. Would've let you do anything you want to me if I know it was you from the get go, please, get in, you'll have so much more fun by being inside of me rather than going around as the little twink,"

After a while, I usually like to check out and test my various vessels which are spread across the globe. Aside from trying to know how well they integrate to human society, I find it amusing to toy around with their feelings and how easy their personality switched between their human persona and my dutiful vessels. It's also a way for me to test my power, like how well I could hide myself to be undetected by their senses which would indicate how well I could hide from other beings that might come to Earth and spoiled my fun. I find it handy to use Vince as my base body since he's loaded and despite claiming to be a very busy businessman when I first met him back then, most of his works are done by other people.

It left a lot of flexibility in his schedule so I simply head to the airport and his private jet ready to drop me anywhere I wished in a moment's notice. After I landed, I usually just dropped Vince's body in the hotel while I did my test, wearing temporary skins that my vessels wouldn't recognize as other vessels of mine and could keep me incognito. Here's what happened in the past few weeks

---

I just smirked as I quickly kneeled and get my tongue out ready to give that sweaty abs some licking it deserves. He's this close to bashed me to death, just like the real homophobic Seulgi would. I turned my incognito mode off and he directly stopped his fist a couple centimetres away from this cute university student's face I slid into earlier. Now, his fist turned into a lustful grab of my hair as he used it to rub me up and down his abs as if I'm some kind of washcloth. His lustful moan is as seductive as I remembered when I took him over in that Hongdae nightclub, and I couldn't help myself but squirted some loads into this university senior's pants while transferred myself to Seulgi through his navel

---

"Oh that was hilarious. I totally didn't see that coming. I really thought you are just one hell of an annoying new client I should endure jist because they could afford me. Totally sorry for being so hard and rude to you Sir,"

I simply smiled. Francis is a personal trainer, a succesful one at that, but I know he's not good with people that are not at least a decently-built individual yet. I slid into this fat fuck when he left Subway and I quickly devised the plot to tick Francis off. I bought some gym clothes to be in character, signed up to the gym where he worked at, asked....no....demanded to have him as my personal trainer and said all the things I know he hated. He's this close to lash out on me, I could tell, but just like the real Francis, he kept himself together. I also didn't find any flaws on the way he behaved like Francis so after about an hour, I turned my incognito mode off and he quickly realized it

"Well Sir, please just left that fat retard quickly and get into me Sir. That look doesn't fit you and I know he only drained you and made you out of breath. Please, it's been a while too since you get inside me,"

---

"Why would you do that, Sir? We are totally fool-proof, you don't have to test us. Is this random test or did you hear anything about us raising other people's suspicion? Now I feel bad for not welcoming you properly, you really played that role a bit too well to, I was this close to slap your face and called you names,"

"No no, you two are doing fine. This is just random test as I'm visiting Egypt anyway. And as for her, I just know you would hate her. Argumentative and loud gym girl that dared to talk back to you? Yeah, that's your trigger, just need to up the ante by disrespecting your mom and boy, I noticed that balled fist yo, I quickly shut off my incognito mode hahah!"

"We felt bad that you have to meet us this way. Maybe you want to slide into Farhan? You've went inside me during Mr. Olympia a couple months ago anyway, Farhan has been longing for you,"

"Well, I'm gonna do it from this chick's body so maybe let's search for somewhere private,"

---

"Master, sorry for being a bit direct but this is not an effective usage of your time. You have so many vessels, why fool around with the ruse?"

"Because I like to do it. And I can do it. Why are you the one questioning me now?"

"Sorry Master. It's just---"

"What?"

"Strip, and where's a bathroom? I need to fuck you with a mirror in sight so he can see that he's just a bottom bitch that lost thr ability to even control his own body and he's not going to influence you anymore even when I'm not inside you all the time. I will make him trapped so deep within his own mind, he wouldn't be able to leak through and influenced you any longer,"

---

"Certainly sir, everything I own belongs to you, including the bitch I'm going to visit. She's all yours. Heck, even if you want to fuck a white twink with my body, so be it, you do what you want with me and my schedule. I'm just so honored that you even bothered to come all the way down to South Africa for me,"

---

"What? Huh....I guess you played Romain a bit too well. Calm down a bit. Get hard. Fuck around more. Stop being so business-minded all the time. It gets annoying to see more of that guy surfaced you know. He's one tough cookie back when I eventually subdued him, turned out he remained tough up until now huh? Giving you a hard time to be loose and free while fooling all the people worked for him. Strip,"

"Oh wow, really? Fuck, I really am going to smash this whole thing with you inside of me during the competition. What a chance encounter this is. I really thought you were just an annoying fan and I only wasted my time here interacting with a fans, but turns out it pays off acting all nice and pretending like I'm this sweet All-American boy when you revealed yourself. Please, you can just jump right in sir, it's been a while since my navel welcomed you,"

[mysoulspiralbound]

drew the Omori party in outfits a little more fit for their adventures than there pj's

explanations, dnd classes, close up's, and Mari & Basil under the cut

Omori is the party's bard, despite looking and acting like a rogue. as both an artist and a poet, i thought bard suited him better. working with his monochrome color palette was a challenge, but i'm really happy with how it turned out. a fun fact is that me wondering where the heck omori was keeping a knife on his person (combined with my horror at him running around deep well in his socks) is what inspired this design series. i'd like to imagine that Mewo is his familiar.

Aubry is a barbarian based on her focus on strong attacks and her ability to channel her anger into large damage. i tried to keep the shaping and color of these designs mostly the same, though obviously more embellished, as she's literally running around barefoot in a nightgown in cannon. sturdy gloves and boots are an adventuring must, and i picked her meteor hammer cause i think it's her coolest weapon. i will never understand why Sweatheart's pillow somehow deals more damage.

Kel is a kind of trickster rouge — he's not great at stealth, but he's got the highest dex of the party and he's not bad at traps. he's got a lot of colors in his shirt which was kind of a challenge, and i really went back and forth on what player class to give him. his pouch is for additional amo, and his gloves are based on archers globes, since he's the only one who uses ranges weapons in the party. if i redoing this, i would might get rid of his undertunic and/or leg wraps. they were added for protection, but i feel they're mostly just cluttering up the design.

lastly, Hero is a paladin, based both on his healing abilities and his knight in shining armor energy. i picked pink as his accent color cause it contrasted best while still remaining in the omori pallet. his pj's were the hardest to match into a proper adventurer's outfit, so Hero's armor is largely independent of his canon design. the rose on his chest is a reference to his charming personality, the chivalry expected of knights, and his flower from basil's garden. it's also there to fill space, as his design was looking a little to plain otherwise. his kitchen knife is gold to match his little sparkles and to avoid having it blend too deeply into his armor.

Basil definitely has some strong "your princess is in another castle vibes, so that's what i went with for his outfit. he's got his classic flower crown, and i tried to put as much plant imagery as possible into his dress. i switched the princes gloves for gardening ones in his redesign, as well as changing how the dress layered so the lacing didn't run all the way down the garment. the frills on his sleeves and hem are designed to look like petals!

last but not least it's Mari! i've kind of got two versions of her, but i do very much like both. first, i drew her as a wizard, based a little bit on gandalf's habit of showing up, lending the party a helping hand before disappearing to do "important wizard stuff." she's important and helpful when she shows up, but ultimately, the party has to do things on their own. her spell component pouch and her staff both have her picnic basket theming added, as it's symbolic of her healing abilities and the safety she provides the party.

the other version i drew of her leaned more towards cleric based on her role as healer. she'd be a deeply religious figure, possibly having it be revealed later on that she's more powerful than the party knows. i incorporated her picnic pattern here as well, and kept the style of her shoes, since she is literally the only one of the main six who wears them in the dreamscape. like wizard!Mari, her necklace and the ribbon around her head are both callbacks to the ribbon tied around her neck in her original design.

[sillygirlsmindpalace]

Day 8: Tea ☕

I find him in his chair watching telly

Why did he have to come today? Now? Of all days?

Of course, I couldn't tell him why I had been out.

What I had been out for.

He gets up.

"Oh you're here!", switches it off

I hold the carry bag closer to my chest

Shelves clinking in haste - too loud and chaotic

When everything's done, I greet him at last.

"Are those intestines?", he inquires, obviously

"Nope", I don't want to lie.

But what will he say if he ever knows?

What will he think of me if he finds out?

"Just...ran out of a few things so dashed to TESCO"

I smile, praying for no more questions

"Fancy some tea?", I try my best

He nods but doesn't seem convinced

It's been a while since he's visited

Visited me while we're not on a case

"How's Watson doing?", I wait for the kettle to boil

"Currently obsessed with Frozen", he huffs

"I can smell a roleplay", I scoff.

We both share a light chuckle

My eyes rest on his, my mind drifts back

To our first time, our first case.

The timer on the phone goes off, startling me

And my heart starts to race

I need the damn bag, out of the fridge!

Two cups on a tray, I take it straight to the table

"John, do begin, I'll be here in a minute"

To my dismay he doesn't, he leans against the counter

"Hmm...", doesn't look up from his phone

I peer into the cold room with my dark secret

A thousand eyes stare at me from the packet

I try to slip one quickly into my palm

The entire bag falls with a cacophony of crinkles

The eyeballs lay laminated as my heart freezes

"What on earth...?", he comes running as I remove all the traces

I don't look at him, I ready myself

To be faced with the horror of his judgement

"It's not what you think", I whisper as I stand up

"You got that from TESCO?", is his only concern

I put one globe in the cup and watch it dance

It had become a habit to watch them swim in the dark brown sea

"But these are for Halloween and it's December", is his other concern

"Maybe someone owed me a favour at TESCO", I smirk.

I got the cashier out of prison.

He sighs and walks back to his chair.

"What?", I frown. "I love some peppermint in my tea"

But I miss him even when he's right in front of me.

The one thing I have hidden from him for months.

Among other things. Other important things.

"Since when do you like peppermint?", he laughs.

I am prepared. I tell myself.

"The day you called me your best man... your best friend."

_________________________________________________________

Don't know what this is. I just let my thoughts flow and wrote this in a rush.

This is a mess. That's all I know. But I'm having so much fun. Thanks to @notjustamumj!! 🩷

[wordsandrobots]

Now I'm trying to sort of reverse engineer why Gundam Wing, of all things, should be one of the more grounded instalments in terms of how it portrays spaceflight.

Like, we've got the White Base over in Gundam 79 sticking two fingers up at the entire concept of aerodynamics, merrily switching between being a spaceship and being a flying aircraft carrier, in the middle of a naval war in space that looked like it mugged Space Battleship Yamato for component parts. This mode continues through the subsequent series up to G Fighter, where they have ships-in-space but they're downplayed in favour of giant drop pods that can also somehow globe-trot with ease.

Then along comes Wing and suddenly we've got actual rockets and spaceships that aren't remotely designed to look like they can fly, and it's not out of being any more realistic. The mecha are more elaborate than ever and the giant spacecraft, truly enormous. But I suppose mobile suits here are depicted as having started as spacesuits, so perhaps it makes sense there's be a greater emphasis on getting the space travel somewhat more 'right'. Or perhaps it's a rejection of cartoonishness, trying to be a little less 'wacky wonder vehicle' when it came to the technology. And I suppose, above all, Wing doesn't require a base for its characters to hang around in. The Peacemillion's roll as that comes extremely late in the game, as everyone finally gets the hang of cooperating in one go. So possibly it's just a confluence of factors.

Certainly it doesn't last. Gundam X is right back to flying (hovering) aircraft carriers and from then on, spaceships that can fly or float remain the norm until Iron-Blooded Orphans (more on this to follow).

Wing remains an interesting aesthetic outlier in this regard.

[cas-backwards-tie]

Chapter Three: Reroute Necessary

COD Men x Reader

Trials & Triumphs | Previous Chapter

Summary: Upon your debrief and explanation to Laswell, a shift in strategy is needed. How your fellow comrades will take that news is unbeknownst to you. Luckily for Laswell, however... you may have an idea or two up your sleeve. Now, it all comes down to a vote.

Words: 2.6k

Warnings: Disappointment, Anger, Humiliation, Embarrassment, Resentment, Passive-Aggressiveness,

Mentions of: Injury, Death, War Crimes, Government, Politics,

A/N: As I continue to delve further into the fandom I've been getting into most recently Johnny, John, and ofc Vlad so now I'm so lost! Ah... oof. Trying not to switch my original idea or add too many things to this. Anyway, this def is not gonna be all actiony every chapter. It'll change route after this for sure! So stay tuned.

"Explain it. Again," Laswell commands. Attempting to withhold the anger in her blue eyes, her fingers grip the edge of her desk a little tighter as she leans over it.

Pursing your lips together, you take a deep inhale through your nose. It's embarrassing enough you'd had to do this once, now you're just being humiliated. Though you've done your best to ignore his presence, you sneak a glance at the man sitting in the chair on your left. While you might not know Captain John Price well, you can see the empathy in his eyes from the momentary eye contact the two of you shared. A sigh tumbles past your lips as you raise your head again, confronting your superior. Starting over, once again, from the top, you explain.

"To start, we set up things together, formulating a plan..."

Things went according to that plan for the most part. The Captain can't deny that. He listens as you explain to Kate for the second time what'd transpired the other night and how, exactly, you'd let Boris Wagner get away. In truth, it wasn't exactly you who'd let him get away. Yet, it also was... wasn't it? If he's being honest with himself, if you'd had a better handle on your team this wouldn't have happened. You would've cleared the building, secured the area, gathered your spread out team and reconvened with his, coming together to flank what was clearly a trap set up by Wagner. But you didn't. Even once you found out it was a trap, he'd heard that you let that Austrian--König, if he remembers correctly--run off on his own after the Tango and try to finish the mission alone. Sure, there's no man left behind. But if you'd followed after König and radioed someone to go back in after Keegan, both things could've transpired and the mission would've been successful. But you didn't. If he'd been in charge he doesn't think this meeting would be going on. Nevertheless, can't go back and change things, can you?

After Gaz had jumped onto the tank and taken out the Tango in the AFV, he'd been able to send the necessary reinforcements in König's aide, yet it was too late. Wagner got away, and the Austrian was injured. The mission failed, and more people were hurt than needed. Whether or not useful information's come of your leading is yet to be determined. Shifting in his seat, John wiggles his jaw a bit in an attempt to bide the annoyance bubbling beneath the surface. He keeps having to remind himself how young you are. Why Kate picked you to lead the entire operation is beyond him. A team, sure, but the entire operation? She's kidding herself, right? They actually want the Party taken down. So does NATO and practically every other nation on the globe.

He'd already relayed his side. From the moment they'd dropped off, things were fine. Everything went according to plan. Once the enemy arrived, Wagner went inside, his team secured the perimeter, Ghost kept a lookout. Things were clear. It wasn't until they were bombarded by a hangar of soldiers that things went awry. Then to make matters worse, they find over a dozen hostages hidden in a compartment within the building. People were hurt, some people died, but most managed to get away unscathed. While they weren't prepared for a close up firefight, they managed to hold off until what he supposes was when your team got to the basement since things quieted down. Bravo team managed to escort the hostages away from the chaos and down toward the exfil location near where the deployment was, South side.

With Graves already there, it wasn't unreasonable that since he was free he could help out, Horangi still keeping watch. With things clear on both sides, it was only when Ghost notified them of the rogue soldier in the AFV that things began going south again. Another firefight started up. He was busy with Graves and Wilson on hostage duty while Soap, Gaz, and McKay went for the AFV and guards that'd come along with the fleeing Target. König emerged from nowhere, chasing down said Target, but it was only once Ghost informed him that he couldn't get a shot on said Target because the Austrian was too close that it was impossible to get a clear shot, that things were doomed. He should've known at that point to take over. You were nowhere to be seen or heard from and for all he knew you could've been dead.

It's not wise to go dark, and considering this was your first mission altogether as a squad it wasn't bright. Thinking back on it, John knows there are certain things he probably could've done to have adapted, recuperated, and saved the mission. He didn't. That's on him, that's his fault, and he hasn't forgiven himself for it, yet it doesn't change the fact that Laswell hasn't decided what's next.

"What do you think John?" Kate asks. Now upright, she crosses her arms over her chest as both women in the room turn to look at him with curious glances.

He hums in thought. "I... missed that. What was the question?" He speaks candidly.

"I said that 'I don't know', but what do you think about her little plan? it'd be a waiting game for sure. Might take months. You'd have to stake out the city, set up traps, lure them in, get to know these creeps, and might even have to participate in whatever they entail, but... if you think it'll work? Infiltrating the Party?" Laswell cocks a brow in his direction, curious for his thoughts and opinion on the matter.

Lips curling inward, he rubs them together in thought. That's not at all what he'd thought he'd missed! Mentally scolding himself for zoning out, as he's not the type, his gaze shifts between the two of you. He's taken too long to answer, now he looks suspicious. "I think the team needs to decide."

"Fine. We'll put it to a vote. Anonymously, of course."

____________

"We're at a crossroads, I'm afraid. So we've extended the option out to you all, putting the mission's stake up to a vote. You've all got pens and paper, and in a moment you'll either write down a 'yes' or a 'no', before I come around and you put it in the tin. Majority wins, though understandably considering circumstances if anyone insists on backing out, they'll be dismissed."

Her fingers absentmindedly tapping against the emptied cylindrical tin, Kate announces what's about to happen. Scanning around the room, you try not to read into everyone's fairly unsurprised expressions upon the news. Did they know this was coming? Did Price warn his team? Were they planning on backing out? Did... did you really fail that badly?

As questions begin to emerge and cloud your mind, you notice Kate about to step forward when a gruff voice captures everyone's attention, halting everyone's movement. "I thought NATO assigned us to this mission?" Ghost's question lingers in the air for a moment as you shift your gaze to the CIA's Liason, Laswell, in this instance. Arms crossed over your chest, you don't comment as your eyes slowly fall to the floor.

"Yes, though it's been brought to my attention that perhaps some people are more or less enthused to continue working on the mission with as it stands-" At this mention, people start looking around the room at one another. You'd overheard some whispers of people saying you'd messed up in leading the last mission, and while you don't necessarily disagree, you know you can't change what happened. Nevertheless, you're more than determined to not let them down again.

"-And, with the last mission having failed, time constraints are pushed even further, the possibility of being on deployment now extended, and the risks are only higher. While NATO is determined on getting the situation handled one way or another, the only question is whether it'll be the people in this room or not. And that brings us back to the vote."

"Can I say something first?" You ask as Kate takes a step forward, and whether she consciously or unconsciously knew it, she'd been signaling her readiness to start the vote, and you're not ready yet.

The woman glances around the room before seeming to have a brief silent conversation with Captain Price through their eyes. It's only a moment before she shrugs, offering you a casual. "I don't see why not?"

Hands coming up to run down the fronts of your thighs, you attempt to meet each of your soldier's eyes. Whatever impression they'd previously gotten from you, hopefully, it isn't permanently seared into their judgment. "First... and foremost, I think I owe you all an apology." As your eyes land on Keegan he immediately looks elsewhere, refusing to meet your gaze. Despite the sling on his shoulder over his hoodie, you know he's still holding resentment toward you. "I put the life of a teammate over the mission objective, and while I could've organized things better from the get-go, I recognize now how I let you all down." Eyes falling to the floor again, you can't help but kick the tip of your combat boots against the multicolored commercial worn-out carpeting of the debriefing room. "I realize I might not get a chance to lead you all again, but if I do... I promise you that I'll do everything in my power to not let you down again."

A deep breath replaces the sigh you let out as the next topic borders treacherous waters. "And I understand why some of you might want to back out now... but I do have to say that I can't. I won't. This is too important, not only to me, but to every single little kid outside these walls." Eyebrows furrowing, you can't help the way you begin to gesticulate with the rising emotions within. "I don't care how long it takes, but this is something that has to be dealt with, and that's why NATO hired us. They knew we could do it, and while you might not want to, and it might be the hardest thing you'll ever do... I'll be damned if I don't eradicate the Party."

Hands sliding themselves into your pockets, and with a purse of your lips, you turn your back on the team and offer Kate one last look before walking back toward the door you'd come in. Your face falls as you exit the room, unable to bear the agonizing wait that it'll take as the men deliberate not only their fate, but the fate of the team. One which you'd never even gotten around to naming.

------------

You find out their decision and next steps around dinner time through email. An automatic fist pump follows as you knew your speech would manage to do some good. At least, you hope it did. Before you can really revel in the fact that your method of persuading Laswell to give you a second chance and changing approaches toward the Party, the gentle slam of a plastic tray on the metal table beside you garners your attention.

"Looks like someone finally caught up on their emails," Graves jokes, sending Olivia a playful glance as he oddly takes a seat to your left.

"Knew you wouldn't give up that easily," Olivia comments with a reassuring smile as she takes a seat across from him. "Though I do have to say I'm curious about how you're gonna pull off that plan of yours. How do you even have him as a contact for bloody hell's sake?" Her posh accent never fails to elicit a smile from you. With a shake of your head, you shrug, eyes following the movement toward the end of the table. McKay slides her tray down toward your group as she approaches.

"Surprised you're not liftin' at this time o' night," Graves comments in her direction, eyeing the muscular woman as she slings a leg over the bench and slides into her seat beside Olivia, forcing the blonde to scoot over across from you, shifting the lovers to sit diagonally from each other.

Amala only responds with a hum of acknowledgment, her eyes unamused as they set upon you. "You're not serious about this, right? Like you're actually joking. You really think Laswell, not to mention, Price is gonna go through with this?" The brunette asks, all seriousness as she leans against the table, her upper half toppled over it as she attempts to close the space between the four of you. Almost as if what you're discussing is a secret. "You think you're just gonna get information from Makarov without a hitch and that's that? We all go free?"

"I guess we'll see," you retort with a shrug. Considering today's events, you're not really in the mood for arguing, and while the proposed plan isn't exactly foolproof, it still provides a better pay off and a more timely solution than what Laswell had originally offered. "It's already scheduled, so... for now all we can do is what they're asking us to do and then we'll see when we get there. Regardless, we're changing tactics. We're shifting gears."

A huff of exasperation leaves the woman as she sits back and crosses her arms over her chest. The slight shake of her head is only amplified by the motion of the dark curls surrounding her head. "I've gotta say, I'm not lookin' forward to training with those miserable tea-drinkin' grumps over there," Graves states. A tilt of his head indicates who he's talking about, and you can't help but instinctively look.

Oh God, how you wish you hadn't. As soon as you look, you can see that Ghost staring at you, though he's sitting at the end of the table facing you, so that's excusable at least. It's not just him, though, but the addition of Gaz. The brown-eyed man had been talking to Soap who leans his upper-half on the table, his arm bent, head held up against his fist, back facing you. Gaz notices your gaze, and the sour look on his face doesn't disappear, but instead is met with a roll of his eyes before he turns his gaze toward the Captain who sits across him. From where you sit across the room it's impossible to hear what they're talking about, and while you could try and read their lips if you really wanted, you don't have the mental energy to do so. Before you turn back, Soap rotates his head and meets your eyes from where he's propped his head up; immediately turning around, you're sure Gaz had mentioned your attention. Price is surely ignoring you, then, you assume.

"I'm not always a grump!" Olivia argues, a pout on her lips as she teases Graves.

"But you love yer tea," he teases back. Apparently, you'd missed some of their conversation, but you could care less considering the nasty looks your joint TaskForce has been giving you.

"They're really mad... aren't they?" You ask, interrupting whatever stupid lovey-dovey shit your friend and her... acquaintance have going on. Silence envelopes your group for a moment, and Amala doesn't bother to meet your eye as she'd begun eating her food when the topic changed.

"Mm... yeah... I think so," Olivia finally responds, a gentle yet solemn tone to her voice as she attempts to carefully broach the subject. "That doesn't mean you can't win them back though? I think showing them what you're capable of is more than enough. Once they see what you can do, you're set. I know it," she adds on. Extending a hand across the table, the blonde places it atop yours before offering a gentle squeeze. With that, the conversation ends, the lovers going back to whatever meaningless bickering they'd been consumed with before. Meanwhile, you're still ruminating on what the forthcoming weeks will entail.

~~~~~~~~~~

acronyms:

exfil: where you're extracted, picked up in the field

forever taglist: @ohdamnadam , @safarigirlsp , @jynzandtonic , @moonlightsolo

t&t taglist: @cosychick , @konigsqueen , @cutegor3 ,

[aching-tummies]

Well if your to stuffed to sleep we might as we'll have some fun with your packed tummy. Squeezing and prodding your belly insisting there must be some air trapped in there that's why you feel so full even as you groan that there's not and jostling your tummy so much is only making it ache worse.

Finally got inspired to write a scenario with this one ^////^ I hope you enjoy! Honestly, not even sure if it's been the same anon for the last 4 asks--but you're a damn good muse.

Honestly, the 3 asks linked below and this one have sent me the last few days and made my entire month. If it is all from the same person it's really testing my stance on IMs/DMs or whatever. Thank you for indulging me and respecting the "Use the askbox" rule of my blog!

"Too Full to Sleep" RP-Starter

1st Ask

2nd Ask

3rd Ask

Scenario under the cut.

"Nnngh. Quit it. Babe--q-quit it." I murmur, whimpers interrupting my sleepy protests as you continue your actions.

I'd been laying on my right side after having spent a few minutes on my left--my shoulder protesting every position. I usually toss and turn at night, switching sides until I eventually fall asleep and wake up to a sore neck or my arm numb from awkward positioning. Sleep hasn't come this night--but not because of the sore neck/arm/shoulder situation.

My belly is visibly distended. Firm to the touch and distressingly stretched around a large glut of food.

You've been messing with it. Patting it, jostling it, smacking it, pressing and prodding into it every chance you get.

I let out a huff. "I keep tellin' you--if there was any air trapped in there at all, it woulda made a noise at any point in the last four hours." I reiterate curtly, more upset at the lack of sleep than at your actions.

"I haven't felt so much as a shift in here--and I know you certainly haven't heard any gurgles." I swat at your offending hands as I turn over and drag my bloated form to sit up against the headboard. I know that you haven't gotten what you've wanted to hear out of my belly. I know what you want and usually, I'd be totally down to be your source of ambient-gurgles. Too bad, it seems that tonight my organs have opted to go on-strike. It sucks for me too 'cuz your incessant probing and prodding has only gotten more forceful the longer my guts refuse to sing for you.

"Give it a rest. All you're doing it making it hurt more." I mutter with a pout, cradling my bloated belly with both palms and running soothing fingers over the achy globe that has taken the place of my stomach. I certainly ain't the trimmest person in a crowd--but I'm content with the fact that I've kept a figure that doesn't 'hang' or 'muffin' or whatever. I'm used to an unobstructed view of my legs while laying down. The current state of my belly obstructs that familiar view.

You shove against my belly forcefully from your spot on my left. I wince as your palm pushes against the unrelenting pressure in my guts, making me see white for a split second. I hear your frustrated snarl when the action isn't met by the usual gurgling.

Damnit. What were those noodles made of? We should check the packaging for the ingredients and wherever it was made. I don't think we'll be buying any more of this particular brand again. Ridiculously filling, sure; undergoes some horrific alchemic transmutation when eaten to become an indigestible mass of matter. It ain't even good for our usual niche interests 'cuz there have been zero grumbles or gurgles in the last four hours. My tummy is clearly distressed and unhappy with what's in it and being done to it--but it's 100% silent--like some mystical being hit 'pause' on the area between my diaphragm and my large intestine, and nowhere else.

You poke forcefully into my navel, frustration clearly coming out in the jabbing force you apply to what's normally the most sensitive part of my belly.

"C'mon! Gotta gimme somethin'!" You snarl--clearly frustrated as you slap at my belly. Replace my belly with a stubborn vending machine that's taken your money without dispensing any sort of item and the internet would tell you 'They're the same picture'.

"Oooh…nnngh…ow." I moan. Moan only. No gasp, no hiss, no pathetically small puff of gastric-smelling air from my lips. I glare at you. "It doesn't matter how much you poke, prod, stab, punch, slap, shake, knead, or pinch--it ain't happenin'."

I shoo you away, trying to soothe my achy belly. Honestly, I wish there was something in there to press out. Four hours and counting of feeling like an over-filled piping bag is getting annoying. My stomach's taken being a tease much, much, much too far. I even tried intentionally swallowing air, but again, ramen must be acting like a plug or something 'cuz none of it settled in my guts and all we accomplished after forcing me to take ridiculously huge breaths and try to push out my belly was just pushing what was a 6/10 on the pain scale up to a 11/10 for a while. The muscles and sinew or whatever else is under my skin in my abdomen were all left aching--like thread being pulled too taut over and over and over again.

Ignoring you never turns out good. Unfortunately, tonight isn't just me giving you the silent treatment 'cuz of some minor argument--my belly has snubbed you too. Knowing you, revenge is gonna be swift. I can only hope. I'm starting to get desperate--feeling so stuffed for so long is exhausting.

[sophieinwonderland]

Hi, we wanted to ask why you target anti endos so much (you know, traumatized people) instead of just existing in your own space and we exist in ours? We don’t mean any harm, just a genuine question we have. Like, what’s your thought process? Can that be explained please?

Because hate and ignorance are infections and if you allow them to fester, the consequences can be disastrous.

And because, like it or not, we all share the same space...

More than ever, in such an interconnected world, separate spaces don't actually exist. There are, at best, isolated spaces where you can spread a ton of hate, but that hate is going to spill out and end up hurting people who aren't in those spaces, just as it did with Aimkid.

Or more recently, the Yaelokre server:

In my opinion, separate spaces are a myth. You can try to divide them for a time, but there will always be spillover.

Besides that... my end goal is conquering that globe.

I have this dream. A dream of a world that's aware and accepting of all types of plurality. It will be slow going and we'll need a lot of support to get there. And people need to be able to feel hope that it can and will happen.

I'm not sure how common knowledge it is in anti-endo circles, but if you've seen people saying "the future is plural," that started right here with me on this blog. (As far as I know. I suppose others could have said it first.)

But getting to that acceptance means we can't be content in staying in our own isolated corners. It's not viable for the future we want to build.

And when pondering the path to that future, one of the things I've thought a lot about is the response certain firsts will get.

If Aimkid faced such harassment just being an influencer with a moderate following for being a pro-endo traumagenic system, can you imagine the harassment that the first real celebrity to support endogenic systems, or even to come out as an endogenic system themselves, will have to endure?

What will the response be to the first scripted television show that explicitly acknowledges endogenic plurality by name as a real phenomenon? (I mean, the Chicago Med tulpa episode did that with tulpas but slipped under anti-endo radar since anti-endos don't watch Chicago Med.)

Currently, the science and opinions of doctors is overwhelmingly on the pro-endo side.

But it means nothing if that knowledge never breaches the spaces where it's needed most to correct misinformation.

For example, did you know that Stanford University funded an fMRI study into tulpamancers, taking scans of their brains during switching and possession? (Possession is a tulpamancy term for taking control of the body or part of the body without fully switching into front.)

There was an AMA a few months ago about this on r/tulpas.

The budget for the fMRI study was about $50k not counting the pay of the researchers.

This does a pretty good job illustrating how much interest there is in tulpamancy and endogenic plurality that they were willing to invest so much into this project.

And the study actually found neurological changes during possession!

But if you go into most anti-endo spaces, they'll tell you that this research doesn't exist. That not only does the science not support endogenic plurality, but that absolutely nobody is researching it because it's not real.

And they're able to claim that because they don't bother looking, never listen to the other side, and refuse to accept anything that contradicts their worldview.

These studies are real though, they're being conducted as we speak, and we're going to see far more of them in the future!

Where we are right now though, all three of the creators of the theory of structural dissociation could release a joint statement with the ISSTD that endogenic systems are real and valid tomorrow, and anti-endos would not hear about it in their echo chambers.

In short, I target anti-endos because lies will prevail wherever truth cannot breach.

[wilhelmsbee]

Okay honestly? I'll just take you up on that offer because I'm obsessed with your edits in general, but if you ever feel like talking some more about that Wilhelm edit you did to the song Ribs by Lorde??? Would love that because that edit lives rent-free in my head! (no pressure though, I just like the idea of like... director's commentary or something for edits haha)

I HOPE EVERYONE IS READY FOR ME TO BE INSANELY DEEP ABOUT THIS EDIT OH MY GOD

preface: i talk ab why i chose each scene for the lyrics, then colouring/font, idk if this is the directors commentary you wanted but like this is how I think about all my edits

We're reeling through the midnight streets- initially, I actually wanted to start it on the this dream isn't feeling sweet line but it just didn't fit in instagrams 1-minute time frame ANYWAY This scene has always been the most painful to me. Wilhelm realises at this moment that he's truly, undeniably alone in his life. Everyone he trusts (or is supposed to trust) has left him, and he has nobody left to go to. He's alone, going through his own personal hell, finding out his only family cares more about public perception than him as a person. It's like the beginning of the worst spiral we see from Wilhelm. Its quite a literal scene-to-lyric moment, but also the we're part feels (to me) like him-as-well-as his public self. Crown Prince Wilhelm and Wille are such separate parts, and its all he has left.

And I've never felt more alone- The THERAPY SCENE! Specifically this is the I think it's better not knowing how it could feel scene, because that truly is the most heartbreaking viewpoint I've ever seen from a character. It was better not being in love because I couldn't miss it. He might be getting closer to the other boys in the secret society, as well as Felice, but he's not really breaking past the surface level with anyone. Not even Felice knows the depths of his pain, he keeps it all to himself. The loneliness crushes him, he wishes he didn't know how love felt. As far as he's concerned, he's never loving someone else again (true) and he's never going to be able to love Simon again (false). In this moment there's this feeling of emptiness. He has nothing he actually cares about, and he wishes that he never cared in the first place.

It feels so scary, getting old- He wasn't supposed to fill this role, giving a speech as the Crown Prince of Sweden about his brother's passing. Wilhelm's character (obviously) fundamentally switches after Erik's death. He used to be a lot sillier, more reckless and more willing to fight back against his parents. But now he's got every single eye on him, watching him. Put into an adult role at the age of sixteen, forced to carry the burden of spare his whole childhood, then suddenly forced to be the sole heir. Even if he had planned to maybe one day be the heir (which he didn't, judging by the he should be here instead of me comment) it wasn't supposed to happen until he was older and wiser. He stops acting like a kid because he can't be a kid anymore. The cuts between the frog/getting the frog/breaking the globe aimed to emphasise this. He's lost all connection to his brother, he's in a place he didn't expect to be until he was extremely old (if ever), and he's lost control of his own life.

We can talk it so good, we can make it so divine, we can talk it good how we wish it would be all the time- I wanted to frame Simon in this as a sort of healthy distraction for Wilhelm. He was the only person in his life who actually looked out for him and cared. They're happy and they're smiling, all the clips are intimate even if there's someone else there. It highlights how they care. It's good, it's divine. It's what kept him happy after the hardest thing in his life (so far). In this edit, he desperately wants it back because he knows how much it helped. It was the only bright thing he had. The cutting to Wilhelm alone in s2 after how we wish it would be all the time just aims to really enforce that he wished it was still like that, wishing for someone who truly cared and loved him. It's all yearning, pining, wishing things were better. Every single clip is a clip in which Wilhelm has been pining over Simon. There's an ache he expresses that was just so, so important to this edit.

This dream isn't feeling sweet- Lots of clips of Wilhelm trying to process things. He's been forced to change his entire life, after all being a prince is a privilege, not a punishment. The 'dream' of being royal crushes him, despite the fact he can't ever voice it. Walking down the halls of his castle, sitting in his private boarding school therapy session with an actual therapist, being driven home in a private car from the party where he was filmed fighting. These luxuries juxtaposed with his actual circumstances hurt. He can't complain because he's got it best in the country, but it isn't a system designed for him, it doesn't want to help him, it wants to make him conform. It isn't fair, but he can't say that.

We're reeling through the midnight streets- He's forcing himself to try and fit the mould while also being himself, and all it causes is pain. He's actively fighting against the institution he was raised in simply by existing. The panic attack from being perceived holding Simon's hand. Deleting his contact after his mother told him 'no more mistakes.' Trying to play nice at the dinner table even though his whole life was crumbling around him and the institution was failing everyone even though nobody believed him. The panic attack/anxiety vomit from Simon going public, against Wilhelm's institution, knowing that he might not be able to protect him. He's got no control in any of these scenes, its a desperate fight against himself. He's a publicity risk to his own family if he is true to himself, and he's a risk to himself if he isn't.

And I've never felt more alone- Desperately trying to comfort himself when nobody else can (or wants to) comfort him. After the fight at the party all his family cared about was the PR response. When August said that Simon would take the fall for the drugs, all he cared about was getting Alexander back. During the uniform tailoring, all Jan-Olof cared about was tradition and making Simon as background as he could. When Wilhelm gave up meditating to soothe his anxiety, he was upset at his inability to calm down, despite the fact he's never been given an opportunity to be calm. Nobody really knows about his mental health struggles, he just has to fight through them and desperately try to self-soothe. Nobody else will comfort him after all.

It feels so scary getting old- Each of these scenes show Wilhelm being viewed as his role instead of being viewed as a person. He clearly struggles with being viewed as just the Crown Prince of Sweden, especially since that was never supposed to be his role, so of course it hurts when he's viewed as just a pawn in the Royal Family. Especially from people he loves. Yes, it was undeniably hard when he first became the Crown Prince, and it absolutely would've crushed him to know that when he had a panic attack he couldn't be alone. But these scenes are interlaced with him being viewed as a political pawn by Simon and his mother. People he loves, people he trusts. He's just a public statement to his mother, and he's just a human representation of the Crown to Simon (in these scenes not in general ofc). He's never going to be able to be his own person again, because he's got a country to run when he grows up and a public image to form between now and then.

This dream isn't feeling sweet- The lyrics are now getting more compounding, it's louder and it's closer. He's fighting to be heard, he's being ripped off of his desk, he's forcing down a panic attack because he needs to be happy for Simon. His emotions aren't allowed, he can't feel anything negative so he won't feel anything at all. Nothing in his life feels good anymore, so he's fighting the losing battle to just try to break even. Nobody would dream of this, I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. He can't even voice that, though.

We're reeling through the midnight streets- Now he's reminiscing about when things were easier, but they weren't, really. Yes, the placard was there the night he first kissed Simon, but that was also the beginning of the horrific realisation he wasn't built for the world he is forced to live in. His mother says 'no more mistakes' and he already knows it means he has to leave Simon. When that doesn't work and it all falls out, he's left to try and clean his own image up by nailing the closet shut with every fibre of his being. His life wasn't better, he's grasping for anything to show him life will be okay again. Everything has crumbled and now he's got nothing, so he yearns for when he had something, even if it was just something to lose.

And I've never felt more alone- He is constantly left. Something that isn't brought up enough is how often he's just abandoned. He has no one to talk to, he's forced to work through his struggles alone because his existence is political and any sign of weakness being public could reflect badly on his family. He becomes the embodiment of the Prince he could never be. Walking to the lake and reminiscing about when he would be happy there. Being left alone by his brother, who didn't even reply to him asking to say hi to his mother and father, who he then never sees in person again. Then wearing his brother's jacket. He's alone, and all he does is pine for a time when he wasn't. All he wants to do is go back and do it all again, and he can't. But he also can't move forward, he doesn't want to, he doesn't know how.

It feels so scary- Only two scenes so I'll discuss 'em one by one: -At Erik's funeral, there's a more literal fear of getting old. I don't want to repeat myself more than I already have but obviously, that forced Wilhelm to grow up and be more mature, and act like a Crown Prince instead of just the Prince. More attention, less room for error. He's terrified of fucking it up, and there's nobody who can help him. -The breakup scene is more metaphorical. He has to grow up and figure out what he wants to do with his life, while also having to grow to understand what he actually has the ability to do with his life. He's not ready to do this because he wants things to be good and happy but it was ripped away from him. He can't just pretend everything is alright anymore, but the amount of maturing he needs to do seems impossible at this moment, especially knowing he was in love with a boy when he wasn't allowed to be. He tries to be both a Prince and Wilhelm and all it did was betray his boyfriend's trust.

getting old- Wilhelm shutting his computer and pressing his hands to his eyes. It's exhausting. He's exhausted. Constantly working to try and be who he's supposed to be as well as being himself and trying to navigate his emotions in a vulnerable state is just too much. He can't carry it all, so he just gives up for a moment. It all goes quiet, but not in a good way. When you're that overwhelmed, the lack of anything just leaves more room to spiral.

FONT CHOICES

Intro: literally my handwriting. I wanted this to feel personal and almost like a desperate written plea to go back to when it was good, and what's more personal than my own handwriting am I right!!!

First chorus loop: Magazine font, it's in pieces and it doesn't match. There's a sporadic chaos, like he's beginning to feel it but it isn't there yet. The text isn't fully opaque, it's in front of him. We're seeing it before he does in this context. Trying to reflect how the media knows things before he does, like his brothers death, the tape leaking, all that good stuff.

Second chorus loop: Big, Bold, Unavoidable! I rotobrushed Wilhelm in every scene so that the text could be intertwined with him. He can't escape the reality of his situation, he is getting crushed by these feelings. The song gets louder and more claustrophobic, the text is in the scenes with him. It haunts him, it's everywhere. When he closes the laptop and it all goes silent, its not relaxing, it just makes you anxious in a different way.

COLOURING

I actually chose the blues from the intro scene, mainly in the night sky bit of the frame. Also! All the happy Wilmon scenes have a higher saturation, though you can't tell because of how I did the colouring. It just results in them being a little bit brighter, because things were good then and I believe it should feel good then, too.

[thehamletdiaries]

So I went to a talk/demonstration about stage sword fighting in Shakespeare at The Globe today and they were talking about how it was likely that in the duel between and Laertes they would have used rapier and dagger in the original productions - as in, they, as well as having the swords, one of which is poisoned, they would both have had smaller daggers and I'm still sort of...thinking about how that would work in staging but my instinct is that makes a lot of sense? Because when Laertes drops his sword/Hamlet grabs it, he would be left unarmed which seems...odd...or they just have to drop their swords at the same time which also seems odd; basically them both having two weapons potentially gives more room for playing around with how and why the sword switches hands twice (could also potentially mean Hamlet drops his dagger in order to have Laertes sword as well as his own for a moment but that's the kind of nonsense he would do).