#this is what it feels like when i stim
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not the usual, but I made something
I just had to. The stupid little dance they do at the end of the movie is my brain 24/7 and it's killing me. There's NO gifs of them doing this dance. I haven't watched this movie in YEARS, I knew it was good but not THIS GOOD.
#lego batman#lego joker#batman#lego#i made a gif#this is what it feels like when i stim#this movie is a masterpiece#for some reason i could only watch it in french and with french captions but i can read french so it was tolerable
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do not pet | i bite | nervous
#my posts#stim#sensory#stimmy#stimblr#stim gifs#fashion#chokers#collars#kinda?#yellow#red#petcore#?#I feel like dog therians would like this but idk what kinda tags that would use#mannequin modeling#this is hard to tag#spiked chokers#EDIT: this was a sfw post 😭 what is happening#edit: removing the ability to reblog bcs I’m started to get rlly distressed when the shop is literally just a fashion shop#you don’t know what the meaning of my post was I went through the shop several times to make sure of it before posting#maybe
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winston (quant kid 2) (billions) declining a hookup (or work shit) later to instead give himself multiple orgasms (or go to math meetup)
#winston billions#corned beef#what's on the agenda? being able to ever if not always prefer sex solo vs dyadic+. [oneself > others] being the best lay you've ever had.#ditching work demands for anything else#even in [au with jobs fairly different in at least some ways] like well it's still Jobs & you're still Autistique#depending on the hooking up proposer maybe it's like hey; if i stay outta your way.... <_<#many possibilities. this can be about Whatever You Want but no reason to not put forth my heart's truth (winston x his prostate)#literally goes and fucks himself. hell yeah#he is using a little stylus for his calculator watch btw. maybe doing fun sequences. my heart's truth: feels like a fun stim too#adding the little flair details here was also a fun sequence of my heart's truth &c#would also be funny for him to be citing alternate items on his agenda that don't exist to get out of Anything proposed. &/or pushed#ooh i have plans then :/ when is it. & such
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with my phantom hourglass replay, there are two things i noticed;
a possible theme you could glean from the game is action vs inaction, and i think it's especially prevalent before you even leave mercay the first time, with oshus frequently urging link to not go after the ghost ship, then to just wait until the broken bridge is fixed, and seems reluctant at every turn while link and ciela are more than eager to go and do something about this problem, and the people of mercay in general talking about things and their problems but never seeming to act on their fears or desires, as well as the mention that due to the ghost ship, very very few people are still sailing around, while linebeck is one of the only people we see in the game actively going after the ghost ship and still sailing around. i might make a longer post just talking more about the action vs inaction in phantom hourglass but i just noticed it a bit and thought it was a bit of an interesting sort of theme you could find in the game.
linebeck moves so fucking much. i think he moves more than any npc in the rest of the game. not just in his intro cutscene where he is very animated, just in how much he moves when just standing in his little idle post, it's damn near distracting when the camera is focused on him, he moves a lot. i don't think i've really acknowledged how much he moves, and it really gives the impression that he's antsy or eager to get going, both of which fit him pretty well with how he acts.
#phantom hourglass#linebeck#loz#legend of zelda#salty talks#imo the action vs inaction thing feels esp interesting to me when looking at oshus specifically. he and his world are in grave danger#and he knows it and he actively does nothing and even seems reluctant to let ciela and link go ahead and do something.#of course he comes around on it but it's very interesting. has he given up at that point? thats what it suggests to me#that hes like. joined the people of mercay in just lying down and waiting for other people to fix their problems or just. not do anything#otherwise on mercay you have that old guy in the bar who spends the whole game not leaving bc he doesnt want to face his wife#and she never goes to the bar to actually look for him and just talks about it if anything#the guy with the blue tunic talks a lot about linebeck and his ship and almost gives the impression that he really wants to talk to him#but yknow. doesnt. theres the women that tells you about docks being shut down and how linebeck is the only person who's showed up#the woman you see at the broken bridge who's just like oh well! time to wait til someone fixes it.#even the guy fixing the bridge iirc is like well fuck i gotta do it or else oshus is going to bitch at me abt it#everyone seems reluctant to act which makes for an interesting way in how our main crew stands out#it is less so oh theyve been chosen specifically for this its moreso they're the ones who are fucking doing something about this#for their own various reasons some of which are more selfish but theyre still doing something#will likely have more stuff to say when im done but ofc we have other characters in the game who have to do with this#anyways. linebeck is so animated all of the fucking time it's great i dont think theres any other character that moves as much as him#when he's just standing around to talking to link it's great. he's so ready to get going.#it works with him being an anxious mess and also with like. oh he's probably understimulated. you know he's got a nasty case of wanderlust#i can put it with the idea that he's understimulated and afraid to stim in public so he's just constantly moving#he probably drums his fingers on tables bounces his leg when sitting paces around switches the way he sits or lays down often#tbh this kinda fits in with him being one of the main characters who takes action moreso than a lot of other characters#his arc culminates in him taking action he's going after the ghost ship he's moving around the world the only issue is that one of the#actions he takes is running away from his problems literally n metaphorically (tho idk if facing the jolene problem is a good idea for him)
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own recording!!!!!!!!!!!!! (<-delighted)
#stim#🌒 gifs#capsule toys#mechanical#turning#gachapon#coin#red#silver#chrome#idk!!!!!!!#i realized after getting my toy that it was supposed to take two coins. lucky! i feel bad for whoever left their money there though..#i have been eyeing this thing for maybe years now#the toy inside is really fun idk what its called it isnt really stimmy its more like a logic puzzle thingy a bit#well it is fun to hold when in ball form thats kind of stimmy#but the turning of the parts is a but awkward it is probably very cheap#i am not complaining
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watching fandaniel go is wild because he is just [vestibular stims] [vestibular stims] [vestibular stims] [vestibular stims] and yeah man that's a mood
#final fantasy xiv#ffxiv#ffxiv fandaniel#the cutscene where he's dancing and pacing in front of zenos in the armory while they talk genuinely startled me a little#with how accurately the editing and camerawork captured What That Stim Feels Like#i'm less inclined to do Large Amounts of Spinning and Bending; and the way i get my arms involved looks different#but something about the energy to it and the center of gravity and the way he Turns when he steps is just Oh Wow Yeah Same#on one hand; surface-level he's the type of Unhinged Manic Pixie Dream Boy that you'd think would be a bit on the nose for adhd headcanons#(which would be valid anyway to be clear but still)#but like. motherfucker has adhd just look at him#and honestly i like that a lot because 'surface level' is the keyword here. he Has Depth and is adhd about it#i need to find that post about how masking doesn't necessarily mean trying to pass for neurotypical#among other things; it can look like playing super hard into Look at How Megadifferent and Quirky and Weird I Am; and yeah that's him#and tbh he kind of vibes to me as having gotten into Being an Obnoxious Flamboyant Theater Kid#specifically because it's a useful cover for being his brand of ND#'those damn wacky rich gay nobles' as an explanation for your behavior is going to get you a very different niche in society#than 'that weird dude who talks strangely and can't sit still and whose social cues are A Little Off'#'and makes bizarre disruptive distracting movements with his body while he talks'#anyway diversity win etc etc i love him#ableism mention cw#ffxivtag#FF tag
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#chattin#nothing bad or spicy i just feel like peep peeping rn#📢🐀!#but there is talk of panic attacks and Bad Stims up ahead (not related to me dw) ->#i was thinking of autistic peppino bc i am planning out the vigilante comic in my head#and like the quick premise is that vigilante comes into the pizzeria and shoots a blank into the ceiling to get everyone to shut up#and quiet down so he can go ask for (demand really) to see peppino bc this fuckerhas a bounty FOR A REASON and hes here to find out why#bc u know; cowboy yeehaw shenanigans#only its like 5am and no one is there jdkdndjdndk he just saw the lights one and went BANGBANG#anyway peppino is in the back cowering bc someone came into his fucking shop and started shooting UNPROMPTED#and hes so fucking scared and unwilling to move and when he sees someone actually come through the back door he starts having a legitimate-#-panic attack and he starts doing the stimmy hands thing over his ducked head#and vigilante is like whoa whoa WHOA WHOA HOL UP WHATS HAPPENIN#like i dont think peppino has ‘happy stims’ he has ‘extremely self soothing’ stims#that include flapping but only if hes so unbelievably stressed that he cant think#or he has more violent ones like pulling at his hair and biting his hands#that on top of like a genuine panic attack where he cant breathe and he thinks his heart is stopping is 😵💫#vigilante is like christ almighty what the fucks got you so damned spooked?? like he doesnt even think of the blank he shot#he assumed someone came in before him or something#and hes like oh shit wait thats mE I DID THAT I SCARED HIM#i am still planning it out but yes. autistic peppino is on my mind 😊#in a more positive light hes very earnest; and good at his job bc cooking in an interest of his#and his responses in social situations are bizarre enough sometimes to wrap back around to endearing#also its an excuse to draw peppino looking very confused but happy and gustavo somewhere in the shot going-#‘the bad bitch i pulled in by being autistic’#swag#ALSO THE TAG IS BACK so i guess i can doodle again heehee
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I think it's important to resist the urge to pathologize ultimately harmless behavior like maybe you can trace it back to its parent disorder but if it's not harmful to you in any way that isn't a symptom it's just a trait
#part of disability praxis is uncoupling productivity from worth#so part of unlearning your own internal and unconscious ableism is like not speaking of neutral things negatively#like in the same way that real body positivity lies in body neutrality#where we don't assign value judgements to physical features#we have to unlearn that neutral behaviors like stimming or using a mobility aid or refusing to cover scars#are somehow shameful or wrong or that they can tell you about who a person is#just because something makes you feel uncomfortable doesn't meant you get to make them stop#it's a negotiation always always always#what are you willing to budge on and which boundaries are hard limits#anyway yeah it doesn't matter if I have a specific bendy joint thing I'm used to how my body works#I'll grant that it can be difficult to tell from the inside what things actually should perhaps be a little pathologized#you know the I though everyone just dealt with this recurring pain school of diagnosis#but that's why you exist in a community so you know when something is actually wrong#or possibly I'm just so used to having my perceptions questioned I just sort assume an authority somewhere is Correct Objectively#and that doesn't exist!#if there is a perfectly efficient method to life to maximize happiness it is impossible for human minds to find except by accident
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#meditite#i never understood this pokémon. what do folks call it? a little angry psychic onion baby? that tracks honestly#the diamond mouth is whatever and i always found myself like. using its name as a vocal stim when i was a kid#bc again this is one of the bitches that was a shadow pokémon in colosseum so i know it pretty well. but it's also like not my fave#it's *really* just out here. floats and is blue and maybe a fighting-type? or at least it turns into one when it evolves#lemme check#okay yeah it's fighting/psychic and medicham doesn't change types. honestly in my mind i still see these two as totally unrelated pokémon#they just don't look the same at all. i get the general continuity bc they have similar-ish vibes but they don't look. continuitous#that's not a word i know but it expresses my thoughts well i feel. y'know. continuitous#i'll have more to say for medicham bc team charm but for now it's just this onion baby
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Could you draw V1 stimming? :]
maybe i'll do a high quality version of this bc i like to point on v1 and say "thats literally me" but for now please enjoy this silly sketch
#if v1 couldve feel anything it probably be exited that one of the biggest obstacles on its way to the deepest layers is finally down#or maybe itll be like 'oh man. my fav blood sack :'('#uhhhh idk but it def sounds like smth worth thinking of#id it feel emptiness when v2 its literal copy was obliterated? by its own blue hands?#and one red kjlJKLDJKLDJFKLD#theres so much potential to stimming v1. what if like. it uses all it hands and wings to stim?#or maybe it doesnt do it with hands! maybe it plays with its coins! or weaponry in general!#like the ammo is infinite anyway why the fuck cant it shoot some into the sky for its own pleasure#ok i need to go to sleep its 2:24am rn. shame on me#ultrakill#v1 ultrakill#request#thank you so much for the request btw!!!! i really appreciate it :)
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A package from @kingcorvuscreations came in today! You know what that means!
Some little guys have arrived!!
The silly
Tiny Sung looks so mischievous >:3c
If you like this selection, you should check out their shop! There are a few more items there to choose from as well.
#suave says#yes yes yes yes!#so very very happy rn!!!#look at the Havve!!!!!! they absolutely knew what they were doing#he’s such a sweetheart in that big sweater!! it’s definitely going up on the twrp wall with everything else#I know exactly where I’m putting keychain Sung#he shall travel everywhere on my earplugs-case that also has my stim/fidget toy and a Ladyworld keychain#it’s a necessity to take those everywhere. so I feel like it’s a fitting place to put a little Sung#oooo! and the holo on the cone gremlin turned out very nice. although I’m not sure how to show that in a picture#this wasn't meant to be like a full review or anything. I just got very excited when I realized what was in the mail
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Silly goofy StanNarrator (Patreon)
#Doodles#The Stanley Parable#TSP#Silly mode leftover doodles from my alt notebook#I wasn't as concerned with making these finished or pretty but they did turn out cute >:3c#Since I've established that Sinister thinks in images the next logical step is imagining the Narrator - and he hates that ✨#He is not made to be perceived! He is an imageless entity! A total enigma! Lol#If we as an audience can imagine what a Narrator might look like - to the best of our abilities - I don't see why Stanley wouldn't#Even if he's not Exact - personally I don't think it matters lol the Narrator isn't /meant/ to have a fixed form imo - it's still flustering#You give him so much material to work with Narra! To imagine what face you might make or your body language#Or worst yet when he plays with the mental projection like a doll - much like what the Narrator does to Stanley hehehe#How does it feel to be ''made'' to do things that wouldn't reflect you! It's an interesting role reversal that works within their confines#Also makes me wonder how much Narra would play into it haha - if Stanley ''flipped him upside down'' would he get dizzy? Even a little?#To what degree is he real! To what degree is Stanley real if he's not being interacted with!! The themes!!!! <3#Anyway lol ♪ Silly Stanley noise chart for funsies#There are a lot of sounds humans can make with their mouths even discounting vocal cords - I could definitely see him doing verbal stims#Who me projecting again? Psh no anyway (lol)#And then some kisses! This is my first time drawing my versions kissing!!! Which actually solidified a new headcanon for the Narrator haha#Because he (ostensibly) needs his mouth to narrate he doesn't like kisses on the mouth :) He weak to it!#Doesn't stop Sin from enjoying kissing him lol - it's a good way to shut up him In Case of Power Play#But sometimes♪ he'll try to respect his wishes - not all the time tho haha
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i either gave myself a concussion or i developed a sinus infection from the cold or both but it's been driving me wild for the past few days.
#✏️ - ᴛʜᴇ ʜᴏsᴛ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴏsᴛ // (ooc)#// i can't stim at all without feeling dizzy and sick#// and it sucks 'cos stimming comes as naturally to me as speaking or walking#// i partially think it's a sinus infection#// 'cos i get this real sharp pain shooting thru my face when i sniffle#// plus i get 'toothache' like pains#// as well as my nose still running every now and then and my throat feeling tight & hurting sometimes#// even tho i should be practically better by now#// but another part of me thinks i gave myself brain damage#// because my eyes have been acting weird - and often seeing a trail behind things in motion#// and that was happening before i was sick#// but i never noticed dizziness or headaches/brain fog UNTIL AFTER i was sick...#// and it happened when i was gently swaying rather than hard rocking#// so i dunno what it could be#// i'll have to wait until monday before i can make an appointment with the doc :(
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i have planned to write a pseudo-essay or some kind of detailed look at linebeck in phantom hourglass and how he can be interpreted as autistic but thats not going very well right now so here are some autistic linebeck headcanons
He has low empathy and as such has a hard time responding very well to emotional situations, but he can take advantage of his lower empathy in situations where empathy could make things harder, like tending to wounds or rationally handling emotionally-charged situations
His coat is a comfort object and he made it specifically to act as a very slight accommodation; it’s heavy and barely lets any light through it, and he can keep all kinds of little things in pockets sewn into the inner lining, but larger objects do make it more uncomfortable to wear at times. It’s mostly good to carry around things to fidget or stim with and can be helpful in trying to recover from overwhelming sensory experiences
He doesn’t usually stim in public, but taps his fingers on tables quickly and tends to rhythmically snap his fingers when excited, and on his ship is more vocal and more willing to stim, even if around others. One of his main stims that he’ll do for no particular reason is that he’ll hold his arm or back of his wrist/hand up to his nose and mouth for the smell.
He masks frequently to please people. His default mask is that arrogant and brave front he puts up for islanders and other he may come across. Usually, if that mask doesn’t work, he tends to double-down because it usually works and, in his experience, dropping the mask has usually gone badly (non masking he’s rude and blunt but more outwardly excited about adventure and his ship and all of that, i consider it where overseas in the game is when he usually isn’t masking. this shifts his arc to be about him learning to stop masking and feel comfortable being himself)
His special interests could include stuff related to treasure hunting but it could really range from stuff about adventuring or the ocean or engineering (relating to his ship) to stuff not at all touched in the game like music. He really enjoys music, listening to it, playing it, and writing it. He also enjoys and is fascinated by shellfish.
When busy or otherwise occupied, he doesn't usually notice when he's hungry. He doesn't have as much of a problem noticing thirst or exhaustion, but feeling hunger is a problem for him, and often leads to him going a long time without eating. On the other hand, he doesn't mind eating the same thing repeatedly and is perfectly fine with blander foods, so handling food supplies for when he'll be overseas for a long time is easy for him.
He knows he's autistic, he's known for a pretty long time, and he has books on it; he also knows that Link is autistic, but doesn't say anything about it and instead waits until someone else tells him. Until (and after, I suppose) Link actually learns that he's autistic Linebeck just makes sure to keep note of what accommodations he might need and if there are any textures or tastes or smells he can't stand. He doesn't have much of a problem helping out during sensory overloads, even soon after meeting him. It's more out of understanding how it feels to not have your needs met and a sort of solidarity rather than actual friendship.
#loz#legend of zelda#phantom hourglass#linebeck#OBVIOUSLY he experiences some nasty rsd and he's a bitch about it that's like. basically canon so i didnt mention it#a lot of linebeck’s autism is based and referenced off of my own with some extra additions#which is why i have an easier time writing him as autistic than link#kindness is a choice and having low or no empathy does not in any way make someone heartless but linebeck does abuse his own low empathy#to be a mean bitch with minimal emotional consequences#i think linebeck would call link a dipshit to his face and then not feel bad about it for like a few weeks until he starts caring abt him#linebeck stimming by smelling his arm is actually my main stim. its probably why i sit all fucked up bc i sometimes do it w/ my legs lol#the masking bit does kinda fuck some stuff up but i personally enjoy that take on him#one of his comfort objects is an old orange cat plushie named copernicus and if you know what that is specifically from thank you im sorry#linebeck being way into music has no canon backup i just like the idea of him playing piano and composing some form of his own theme#piano is a mad sensory experience btw i dont yet know how to really play it but when i did keyboard in pit it was a fantastic feeling#bangin' out the tunes. it was a really good sort of stim if i was feeling a bit overwhelmed by all of the new tech and music too#salty talks#not entirely an autism headcanon but he thinks gender is a sham and less identifies as a man and more specifically considers#his gender identity to be 'real man of the sea' which is initially kinda silly but kind of a fucking gender move tbh#i dont think he's explicitly trans or nb he's just having fun fucking with his own gender and doing whatever he feels like doing#he isnt a man but he is a man. kind of like how im a dude but also not. yeah.#these were initally going to be call 'quick' headcanons but you can see why i uh. didn't end up going with that
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i'm not allowed to listen to pink pony club anymore because i've sung it so many times i've developed what feels like a bruise in my chest. 😑 i've genuinely never had this problem with one of my on-repeats before.
#it's the part that goes gooooood what have you dooone. you're a pink pony girl. and you dance at the club oh mama iiiiii'm just having fun.#on the stage in my heels. it's where i belong. down at the#because the thing is you start high as fuck and then descend‚ descend‚ descend‚ and back up! descend‚ descend‚ descend#and it feels so good it's crazy#i normally don't sing stuff that's that violent a change and i didn't entirely know that i could#and i can't! i have hurt myself. should not have immediately done it literally a hundred times.#normally when i vocal stim it's just stuff like 'you know what it never was? that serious. it was never that serious.'#and i can get a little loud sure#but it's just not the same as belting as hard as you can again and again and again and again 😖#adam yaps
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Remembering that two long-running arcs of the Origami Yoda series regarding Dwight were his classmates becoming real friends with him as they stop seeing him as the ‘weird kid’ and connecting with him as a person, and Dwight starting and continuing to date Caroline, the girl he likes. These arcs present to the (presumably neurotypical) audience, an autistic-coded character as someone nuanced and human, who is capable and desirable as a partner and friend, encouraging the idea of looking past dismissive judgements of strangeness and to try to understand people, and even if you can’t, accept them and appreciate them for who they are.
#I am having thoughts and feelings abt origami yoda agin#because like. those are the major arcs w Dwight-the ones that aren’t kept to one book alone#it’s nice seeing them go from kinda just tolerating Dwight because he’s a similar outcast and they need yoda#to them actually liking him and wanting to spend time w him (see the museum visit when tommy is ditched by kellen for Dwight)#and Dwight never magically changes to become ‘normal’. the closest he gets is when he’s at that private school which is observed as kind of#stifling? to all the things that make Dwight interesting and creative#nah the series goes on and Dwight still stims and gets sidetracked by his special interests either to his benefit or detriment#but none of the kids have a problem with him for it. they get that it’s Dwight and these are the things he does#they don’t have a ton of moments of insight into dwight. they talk but they don’t dissect their conversations to parse out what he means#and that makes their communication of messages a little tricky#but the thing is: even though Dwight doesn’t tell them in a way they understand why say the rib bq is so important to him#or why he stims or what sensory issues he has because they might not have the language#even though they don’t have that passage of conversation clicked up#they accept these things as a part of him. and I think that’s a nice message to send.#maybe you won’t fully understand the people in your life but you should try. and even if you can’t you should accept them. quirks and all.#the strange case of origami yoda#origami yoda series#my post#tscooy
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