#this is what happens when im sleep deprived

[doginurbloodstream]

i am bive from regretevator!

i dont particularly miss the regretevator universe.. i do enjoy the game though

i know two infected fictionkins, one of which is also unpleasant gradient and poob!

id say im a 3/10, i tend to be a very rational person (i think)

bive is unlabled mspec but wlw and im aroace transmasc

my fictionkin identity doesnt really effect daily life, if at all. it has to be triggered by specific bive related things. the closest its gotten is wanting to yell out "me" whenever the npc me entered the elevator while i was playing with my friend, who does not know im a fictionkin, so there was like an awkward pause where i stopped myself, and then yelled bive. there are random bits of dysphoria i guess, i dont like talking in third person, but its mild and i can get past it.

my fictionkin experience is mainly unpleasant (gradient) unfortunately. shifts are euphoric but also stressful. i tend to have to consciously ground myself a bit, because i have felt like im being watched in the past. i knew/know i wasnt, i just couldnt shake the feeling. i mean coming up with theories for the game where i can just completely let lose is fun, however it is saddening that i will probably never come up with a real one.

death note, touch tone telephone (i was based on that song so its not surprising), and i recently realized the backrooms does too. theres more im not thinking of

im not sure, its not psychological and i think dont believe in most spiritual things. its probably a multiversal thing, but i dont know from there so i usually just say unlabeled.

i do experience shifts! they are always triggered tho, thankfully. i dont get them too often. the first two shifts i had were me being paranoid abt things (the very first one was very out of control, but i was sleep deprived and depressed at the time). the second time i talked about two questions ago. i didnt have any shifts for awhile after that until i my plushie arrived, and i stayed up quite a bit just missing mediamates. that was rough. my later shifts were triggered by trying to come up with theories for the game, altho i wasnt aware i was shifted, until later, i thought i was just excited. the theories were really unhinged, and i thought i was a genius. it was rly fun tho. harmless shift. today i had a brief shift, i was looking at a bive fictionkin stimboard, and there was like a liminal space gif + music was playing, and it looked.. all too much like the lab. i started crying a bit, even tho i do not think have kinmemories, but it ended pretty quickly cuz my friend msged me a joke and the shock value got to me lol. ive also had phantom shifts, but not much recently. i may have had tail shifts, but its difficult to differentiate between kintypes

my media is regretevator on roblox! i do cringe at it sometimes tbh.

when i see fanart, it sort of feels like it was made FOR me specifically lol. what i know abt my canon heavily aligns with the fanon designs so thats cool. when it doesnt align i do feel a bit off tho- like no, that isnt me. you got it wrong. ironically this happened with a recent canon update, when they added melanie WHO IS DEAD. she was supposed to BE dead and STAY dead. and then also, why do i welcome her back?? why am i so friendly?? i mean i get that shes like friends or smth with split, but i just dont trust her. i have no reason not to, i just dont. that is WRONG. you. NO. get OUT.

ooh ooh! i like this question. i have a large, reptile-like (but hairy) non-prehensile tail! my hands and feet are clawed, with only 4 digits. for my feet i have like thumb things coming out of my heels, similar to a bird. i likely am very similar the upcoming remodel, but i cant confirm as i have not seen it. i just know im not a roblox character, and the previews of splits remodel feel very familiar.

ah.. ships. i dont see much of them outside me n split. if i do i just think its a bit weird, and move on. i wish i was seen as more than just someone who likes her. theres more to me. the majority of bive fans are mainly spive fans. i decided to look myself up on tumblr and i was just flooded with shipart. there is MORE TO ME. I AM MORE THAN HER. PLEASE SEE ME FOR ME.

in current lore me and split have feelings for each other (cant relate, im aro, but spive is in my canon tho) and are GOING to confess but that has not happened yet. i feel kinda weird abt it since i have very mixed feelings on romance, but i think we are a thing in my canon, because MY GOD I MISS SPLIT SO MUCH. I MISS HER.

Alex's fictionkin ask game!

(mostly for fictional characters)

🌲 - what is your fictotype?

🪲 - do you miss your home? Or maybe you're happy that you're here?

🐸 - do you have any sourcemates? If yes, who/what are they?

🌳 - in scale 1-10, how are you similar to your canon?

🌿 - does your fictotype have a different sex/gender identity than your body/you?

☘️ - what aspect of life does your identity affect the most?

🪴 - is your fictionkin experience unpleasant or enjoyable for you?

🍃 - what reminds you of your fictotype? (E.g.: a figurine, a doll, a tv series)

🌄 - on what level is your identity? (E.g. spiritual, psychological, psychical)

🐢 - do you experience shifts? Of yes, how do they look like?

🥝 - what is your source?

🐛 - how do you feel about fanarts of you and fanfictions?

🌵 - do you look exactly like in your source or do you look different? If you do, then what is different?

🥀 - what do you think about ships with you?

🦕 - do you have/had a loved one in your source?

♪♪♪

So, yeah, that's all! :D

Reblog this, so the others can ask you questions or answer them all right now, if you want to :>

[megapocalypse]

"Oh Binghe doesn't need to be in a relationship he needs to be in therapy" THE WEIRD LITTLESPACE MANBABY × MILF ROLEPLAY IS THE THERAPY !!!

None of you understand, you don't get it: A normal therapist can't fix them because they're fucking insane.

Like SQQ isn't a normal guy who is forced to date an insane guy, he's an insane guy who thinks he's normal dating another insane guy.

Could you imagine SQQ actually going to therapy?

"Oh I'm not grieving for LBH"

"You called out his name multiple times, you haven't eaten or slept, you picked up all the pieces of his broken sword and made a grave-"

"Nonono you don't understand I'm not grieving, I just lost my appetite and I've been bored lately so-"

It's like when you find someone else who's also neurodivergent and has the same hyperfixations as you, you can both telepathically communicate via autistic swag and the spiderman pointing meme. Like the pieces just fit.

Bingqiu are two cringefail losers who fell in love with each other because they're cringefail soulmates. Their cringefail is what binds them together 💕

The teacher/student boymommy roleplay they're doing in public in front of everyone including the sect leader is just their deranged way of therapeutically working through their issues together. SQQ is so repressed he twists himself into a pretzel and shrivels like a prune and LBH is a cringebabypuppyboy yandere chuuni with abandonment issues.

Falling into the routine of milf roleplay is what helps them communicate their issues together; making a long extrapolated monologue over how he'd never abort Binghe is how SQQ is able to communicate that he loves him and accepts his feelings.

If you can't see the boyfailure then idk what to tell you 🙄

[divvariance]

[groundzer0s-art]

Who let him look like that

[kris-cant-draw]

zooted tbh creature i drew, yes its very ovius i censoryed my finger tip

[randomapplekey]

I'm conflicted about if I should push through finishing art comm or sleep

Have 3hrs of sleep or none? 🤔 (I have class tomorrow)

[psychearrows]

where’d the post go? did it ever exist at all? is it a hallucination? am I gazing upon a meeting between specters?

@augmentedchordsofficial @acewithobsessions

are you real or are you just the fragments of dreams i once had?

[the-ace-with-spades]

Unhinged fic idea incoming...

An AU where Buck is the one looking for a sperm donor.

Buck is trans in this AU fyi and there's trans pregnancy and related stuff involved

He's obviously in love with Eddie, had been for a long time, and for a little bit after he and Taylor broke up, he hoped.

But then nothing happens. Because nothing ever happens between them, no matter how many nights he stays over, how many dinners he cooks, how many times they go out, how many times they spend the evening like a family -- they're not. Chris is not his son, Eddie is not his partner, and there's nothing happening.

And Buck, at that point, is tired of hoping for and waiting to have his own family.

This is when Connor shows up -- Buck was stealth back when they lived together so he explains, that sorry, dude, no dick or anything like that here, so can't give you sperm.

But Connor gives him an idea.

At first he thinks it's crazy and pushes the thought back because it seems to be more of a fantasy than anything - Buck having his own child without another person involved.

But then, well, why not? There are single mothers that decide to keep a baby from accidental pregnancies all over the world and Eddie is a single dad himself -- if he can do it, why couldn't Buck? He's got a stable job, financially he's okay, he hasn't had any health issues in a while, he wants to be a dad more than anything, and he wants a family more than anything, even if just a small one.

So he sets a plan in motion, talks to his doctor, goes off both HRT and birth control and starts looking for someone willing to donate sperm to him or sleep with him.

He's got a few candidates lined up - past friends, mostly, because he wants someone he knows and can trust with such a delicate process, someone who won't take advantage of the situation - and when his period finally comes back after two months off testosterone, he starts calling up.

He's got one guy he used to date in the fire academy who has agreed to try and get him pregnant. They meet up, they talk about what they're more comfortable with - Buck was going to go with the good old cup and syringe method insemination, but Gabe says they could have some fun while at it.

It's going alright - they meet up for sex two-three times a week, there's absolutely zero feeling to it, and after two months of trying, nothing happens.

And then the crew finds out.

There's lots of opinions and questions why ('I'm tired of waiting to have my own family') and why couldn't he just wait until he finds someone ('I want a baby, not a partner, and I'm not getting younger and the timing is right'). Eventually, he explains everything and tells them the plan and all the preparations he's done -- medical, financial, housing, etc. and everyone realizes this isn't something he's doing on a whim and agrees to support him.

Everyone except Eddie.

Who seems to be incredibly offended that Buck 1) didn't tell him about the plan, 2) didn't ask him to be the baby daddy donor and instead asked some other random guy.

Buck, because he's oblivious, thinks Eddie's weird behaviour is only due to the first reason and gets defensive that he doesn't have to tell Eddie about all his life choices any time Eddie brings up the topic.

Cue month three of trying to get pregnant and Buck tells Gabe hey, I actually would prefer to switch to the cup and syringe method. And the dude blows up about how he's only doing it for the sex and he's infertile anyway so whatever Buckley.

Obviously, that's upsetting because he's just wasted three months but also because he trusted Gabe and it turned out like this - so how is he supposed to trust any other guys on the candidate list?

Everyone on the team is sympathetic - Athena offers to get that guy for extraction of sex under false pretense - but Buck just kinda feels like giving up. Hen mentions he can just use a clinic's donor, doesn't have to be doing IVF for that, just get a donor catalog and go for the specimen to the clinic or have it delivered to his house and do the syringe method anyway. It's going to cost some money but still cheaper than IVF.

Eddie still hates the idea.

And Buck gets one catalog and brings it to the station so he can talk to Hen about it (since she and Karen had gone through the process before) and Eddie is really snarky the whole day about it, with little comments here or there.

At some point, Buck just can't take it and tells him, 'If you think I'll make such a bad parent why don't you just tell me to my face, loud and clear.'

Obviously, Eddie tones down immediately. Explains that hey, this isn't what I meant, I just don't like the idea of you having a kid with a stranger you know nothing about.

They have a whole discussion when Buck confesses he doesn't like it either but he's desperate and please don't make me question it even more, I just want a baby at whatever cost.

So Eddie takes the opportunity and says, 'I'll be your sperm donor.'

Buck knows it's a bad idea but it's also the best he can get from Eddie - maybe he won't love him and maybe they won't be a family in a little unit of four, but he'll have a baby that's a little bit like him.

Because he has the rest of his self-preservation and doesn't want his heart to break any more, he insists on doing it with the cup and syringe method.

Which backfires spectacularly since he's literally sitting outside Eddie's bedroom while he comes into a cup and when it's his turn to lie down on the same bed and do the insemination, Eddie is like, I could help you with that, probably easier if someone else does it for you. What was supposed to be a simple procedure of draw the sperm into a syringe, inject the syringe's contents up your vagina has just changed into something very intimate.

They try for three months like that and once again, Buck is starting to think there's something wrong with him because he's not getting pregnant. And like, he cries about that a little bit even though he knows it takes six months on average to get pregnant and Eddie offers, you guessed it, let's try it the standard way because maybe that will help (knowing fully well it only busts the chances of getting pregnant by like five percent tops). Buck is desperate, so things happen.

They start having sex.

And Eddie gets, like, really obsessed with it too, just so Buck finally gets pregnant and stops feeling like it's his fault it's not happening faster. He is also tracking Buck's cycles, too, now, and plans for them to have sex on all his predicted fertile days. When one of those days falls when they're on duty, they have sex in the back of the (parked inside the station) truck.

The universe apparently thinks it's funny because that's the lucky time...

Buck is pregnant and so happy he doesn't realize Eddie is mentally freaking out because 1) that means they'll stop having sex and more importantly 2) Buck is having his baby and he's expected to let him parent them alone and never say a thing, just observe from the sidelines as a friend (which ironically is how Buck's felt about Eddie and Chris...)

It quickly proves to be impossible - Buck's got his first ultrasound scheduled and Eddie is like, 'I'm going with you' because he can't imagine not being there for Buck in such an important moment and not seeing the baby for the first time with him.

Which sets off an argument because Eddie was supposed to be a donor not dad and Eddie finally loses his cool and yells, 'I can't.'

Buck is definitely not getting it and is upset because Eddie still doesn't love him but he's already gotten attached to the baby that was meant to be his only in DNA. It's irrational but he feels like Eddie's going to take even this from him, the baby that was supposed to be the small part of Eddie and his dream family he could have.

And Eddie feels guilty because he promised he'll just be a donor but it turns out he can't, he feels like he tricked Buck into this situation. He can't quite literally make this worse so why not just come clean, right? Tell Buck he's sorry and he's in love with him and he really did offer to be a donor thinking he could be just a donor but he can't let go.

Obviously they get together before the first ultrasound.

The only problem now is no one at the station knows that Eddie is the baby daddy, and not some anonymous donor from a catalog.

Chaos ensures

[salchichas-art]

that moment when you realize that your post had a typo in it hours later but people already reblogged it.....

[opttagoyeo]

Naruto: Hey, Hinata I have a question..

Hinata: Yes, Naruto-kun? What is it?

Naruto: So... let's say I've got reincarnated in my next life as a ramen, would you..*scratches the back of his neck* would you still love me?

Hinata: R-r-ramen? *blinks furiously*

Naruto: Yeah! Would you still love me though even if I got reincarnated in my next life as some bowl of ramen?

Hinata: I love ramen, so I will still love you even when you're a ramen.

Naruto: Yeah.. but would you eat me though Hinata?

Hinata: Eh.. uhm..*fiddles her fingers* I don't think— *nods* ..Sorry, Naruto-kun!

Naruto: Hinataaaaa!!! *jumps on her to hug her*

[orcelito]

Just wanted to say please take care and let yourself be taken care of! You don’t know me but I’m Fanny too

❤️ thank you

Doing My Best. Not much I can do now but slowly work on moving on. Thinking about all the logistics helps. I got Things To Do, things to figure out, and it's giving me direction. So at the very least, I won't end up as listless as when my uncle died, though idk how I'm gonna handle it in the coming days.

I'm sure it'll hit me more before too long. It kinda just doesn't feel real right now. But then again, it's been 7 months and it doesn't feel like my uncle's gone either. I feel like the dead never truly leave our hearts, no matter how much time passes.

Unintentional ramble, but thank you, Fellow Fanny 🤝. I'm doing my best.

[skyeateyourdonuts]

weeoo

[feral-ass-raccoon]

when i tell you the amount of pure joy i feel when i see that a mutual has responded (whether it be an IRL Moot or a fellow "Bullying Morro On The Internet + Morro Himself" crew) or otherwise interacted with me just. does not do it credit

like i get so much fuckig dopamine when i see that a moot has responded via reblog and i can Interact With Them holy shit

will we ever know anything about each other past Tumblr names and pronouns? no.

but oh my fucking god if i do not cherish each and every one of the stupid and/or bizzarely deep conversations i have with these people.

[qazastra]

in the trenchessss i cant even spell anniversarry on the first try. anniverssary. anniversary FUCK

[pepprs]

just went thru all of the notes on that post and like. YEAH. it’s a fucking wonder. like i should get to scream. i should get to lie down. i should get to have as many treats as i want for free.

[quietwingsinthesky]

crucial to human!au raphael is that they don’t even want the fucking job of dealing with michael, they don’t want that!! that’s their brother!! he’s their older brother and he should not be their responsibility, but between their dad dying/abandoning them and how thoroughly fucked michael is by that, and the fact that gabriel and lucifer are out of the picture to help in any way, raphael is the only one left! and they don’t want this fucking job!!!

but who else is going to do it.