#this is still dumbbell related at heart
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theadventurek9 · 2 days ago
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Thing #417 Ryker finds stressful and he would rather hide than do:
Food scatter
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ntls-24722 · 3 months ago
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Weird question but how many hearts do Debu and Zebrapeople have? Due to their massive size my brain imagines the Debu having multiple hearts but I wanna know if you think the same or if they would just have one massive one
And also-
What symbol would they use instead of the human “heart” symbol? If they have a symbol for that at all? Because humans use hearts for emotion things only bc your heart muscle pumps blood faster when you have intense emotions of some kind. But obviously it doesn’t actually do anything desire just pumping your blood for as long as you live-
So would the Debu, knowing more about anatomy, have something more brain related instead of heart related? Would there be a brain symbol instead of a heart symbol? Or would the heart still show instead due to the brain having so many possible meanings?
I actually originally thought of them just having one big heart?? but I'll do you this and give them something at least a little freaky: there's two right next two eachother like kidneys. They're a little flatter than our hearts but they work just fine, and I also added how their lungs look just to show what they have going on. (debu have an ancestral vocal sac that was actually repurposed as a regular air sac for better oxygenation as they adapted to higher altitudes, similar to how birds breathe)
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As for the "heart" symbol, they actually usually connect the two hearts in a lot of stylizations of it, into this "dumbbell" sort of look. And you're right, they don't actually use hearts as symbols for love... unless they do? Hearts are instead broadly associated with adrenaline and fear, and are sometimes used in sports symbols for that reason. Technically hearts could be used for the purpose of love since it's also just a general intensifier, but it's usually reserved for when someone is terrified or their blood is pumping for whatever particular reason.
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I actually don't think Debu would have a dedicated symbol for it since they interestingly don't have a word for most types of love in the first place. There's a dedicated word for romantic love, but familial and love for other things don't have a catch-all term for it, and debu have to describe it in other ways. Though, this is slowly changing, since for hyperbole/comedic effect Debu have started using the word "love" for things they really like, similar to the way we do. It would still come off as extremely weird if you were to say you "love" your family, though...
Zebrapeople's symbols for love are actually really interesting because Zebramen have bubbles to depict love (and a creature that that notion comes from), and zebraelves have literally billions. I was going to include them but I'm kind of sick and drawing it gave me a headache halfway through but i might make a dedicated post for that
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itsawritblr · 1 year ago
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Stop buying this bullshit.
I'm gonna get damn real here.
This is an utter and complete lie:
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Obesity is second only to smoking as the leading cause of preventable deaths in the U.S.
We know this. This is not up for debate.
Obesity leads to Type 2 diabetes, hypertension, coronary heart disease, stroke, gallbladder disease, osteoarthritis, sleep apnea and breathing problems.
Oh, and the really fun ones: several types of cancer.
This I have personal experience with. I was "borderline" obese, and supposedly fit. I walked a lot and weight trained. But I developed pre-diabetes and hypertension. Then last June I was rushed to the hospital to have an emergency hysterectomy to remove a cancerous tumor the size of a softball, which had been causing me to bleed non-stop so profusely I came this fucking close to dying from organ failure.
The cancer is the kind that develops in the uterus because an unhealthy amount of estrogen builds up in female body fat, triggering uterine and cervical cancers. The more fat, the more likely you are to develop cancer. (Luckily mine was fully contained, hadn't spread, and they got it all. *knock wood* But I still have to wait a year to be certain it's completely gone.)
Obese, active women in their 20s - 30s and even in their 40s think that because they haven't developed any of these diseases they're healthy and will remain so. What y'all don't want to hear is something you may have heard from older family members: once you get into your mid-40s it's like a switch is turned off. Your metabolism slows and you have to work extra hard to keep weight off, and even harder to lose it. Hence the "middle-age spread." Your 40s is when Type 2 diabetes, high blood pressure, and all the other shit begin to manifest. And you are no longer healthy. In fact, you better fucking pray you have good health insurance.
Greedy assholes and deniers like Lizzo are selling this empty dream that you can be 200+ pounds and it will never lead to illness or joint pain. Getting people to eat healthy food is hard; self-denial ain't fun. So what do we do? We tell girls and women that they can eat whatever they want! No more sacrifice or self-denial! Convince them so they make TikToks that just show them proudly cramming fast food! Convince females that being fit is Oppression and Racism!
Fetishize obesity! Make Obesity fanart a thing!
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Sell them XXXL clothes and tell them they're hot at 300 pounds! And when they're in their 40s and start getting ill -- or even before that; Type 2 is showing up in fucking middle-schoolers -- you've already made your money off them, and who the hell cares what damage has been done?
Please, for fuck's sake, don't buy this.
What about someone like Lizzo, who's so active and is vegan? Huh, girl, please. I've seen the TikToks of the vegan food she eats. Vegan fast food. Which still is packed with calories and poisonous levels of sodium.
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You have to burn 2500 calories to lose 1 pound. So, if her diet is truly plant-based, Lizzo should be losing a lot of weight. But that girl is still over 250 pounds. This doesn't add up. To maintain her size with her level of activity she has to be eating a shit-ton of food. Probably all that fast food. She's in her 30s now. If she doesn't get that weight off she still faces the probability of any or all of the obesity-related illnesses, no matter how much she works out.
What have I done for my own health? I'm 99% vegan (except for holiday meals). I walk, if not outside then in place at home. I lift weights at home, inexpensive dumbbells and a barbell and a weight bench from a used exercise equipment store. I read Forks Over Knives magazine for recipes and inspiration. My blood pressure is dropping and so is my weight. And I feel better than I have in decades.
Getting weight off when you're younger than 40 is a hell of a lot easier than after. So do it now. You'll live longer and be happier and healthier in your later years. Because unless you die you're going to get older.
This woman is one of my inspirations.
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thefinalcinderella · 2 years ago
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Tsurune: Irodori no Issha Episode 5: A Woman’s Heart is Difficult to Understand?
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I was too busy last week to translate this so here
Tsurune translation masterpost here
Nanao: Let’s see, we bought steak, we bought garlic. Oh, the butter?
Kaito: I bought it. For rice, frying it in butter rather than cooking oil makes it taste better by far.
Nanao: Is it? You’re so fired up since it’s been a long time since you were in charge of dinner
Kaito: It’s also been a while since I went to the shopping mall. 
Kaito: Hmm? Hey.
Nanao: Oh, it’s really Ryouhei.
Kaito: He’s looking at some sparkly and stylish items?
Nanao: ......Hmm? No way!
Kaito: Hey, Ryouhei
Nanao: Ah, Kacchan!
Ryouhei: Huh? It’s Kaito and Nanao! Are you two shopping together?
Kaito: Yeah. We’re buying stuff for a dinner party. Are you buying scented candles?
Ryouhei: No, it’s not for me. I’m picking a present
Kaito: For who?
Nanao: It doesn’t matter who it’s for! Right, Ryouhei?
Ryouhei: My sister’s birthday’s coming up
Kaito: Sister
Nanao: Oh, so it was for your sister~
Kaito: What were you saying before!?
Ryouhei: I give her one every year, so I’m all out of ideas. I’m having trouble
Nanao: I get that~
Kaito: You give your sister a birthday present every year...!?
Ryouhei: Oh, that’s right. You guys also have sisters. Can you tell me what birthday presents you give them? I want suggestions!
Nanao: Okay.
Nanao: My sister is in her second year of middle school. It seems that she wants stuff that looks good on social media. So I give her accessories and stuff like that. Cheap ones, though.
Kaito: For a middle schooler, she’s way too mature for her age...
Ryouhei: Accessories, huh.
Ryouhei: I don’t think my sister wears those too often.
Nanao: So our sisters are divided into the “wears accessories” and “don’t wear accessories” factions, huh~
Ryouhei: What about you, Kaito? You have two older sisters, don’t you?
Nanao: The oldest, Yuu-neechan, is 19, and the second oldest, Minami-neechan, is 17
Ryouhei: My sister is also close to their age. Tell me what you gave them before !
Nanao: Tell him, Kacchan
Kaito: ......I forgot.
Ryouhei: What? Even though it’s two times a year?
Kaito: Um, well, is remembering your sister’s birthday even a thing in the first place?
Kaito: Do you just live your life everyday, and then you suddenly think, “Oh, it’s almost my sister’s birthday. What should I give her?”
Ryouhei: Yeah.
Nanao: Yep.
Kaito: No!
Ryouhei: Eh~???
Nanao: Hey, Ryouhei. I’ll add onto Kacchan’s lacking answer. 
Ryouhei: Mmm?
Nanao: Ryouhei, you love your sister, don’t you?
Ryouhei: Yeah, of course
Nanao: Then, your sister's love for you is double yours. 
Nanao: No, she loves you three times as much. 
Ryouhei: Is it like that?
Nanao: Yep
Nanao: So, in the Onogi family, there’s the big sister, big sister, and Kacchan.
Nanao: Kacchan’s the youngest and the only boy
Ryouhei: Right
Nanao: That’s why if Kacchan decides to give his sisters birthday presents...
Kaito: The woman at our place will just make a huge fuss over it, including my mom
Ryouhei: Doesn’t that mean they’re happy?
Kaito: Being happy isn’t a calm reaction. It’s like tossing a lump of meat into a pride of lions
Nanao: I think it was the year before last~ When Kacchan gave Yuu-neechan hand cream, she told all our relatives, “Kaa-kun gave this to me,” and passed it around for them to put it on
Kaito: Don’t make me remember that...
Nanao: For Minami-neechan’s birthday, you gave her dumbbells, she got angry at you and said, “Are you saying that I’m fat?” We had a hard time calming her down~~
Kaito: She keeps saying she got fat everyday, so I gave her dumbbells, so why did she have to get mad at me?
Nanao: Your sister’s still a girl, you know? Diet-related goods as a gift to girls are very risky, you know?
Kaito: Hah? Stop talking like you know everything. That part of you is problematic. 
Nanao: Kacchan, you can’t straightforwardly accept the love from everyone, so I think you’re the one with problems here~
Kaito: Ah? You wanna go? 
Ryouhei: Hey, don’t fight! How about this, then?
Ryouhei: I’ll buy an accessory, hand cream, and dumbbells, and I’ll have my sister choose her favorite from them! 
Kaito and Nanao: You love her way too much!?
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strdstd-m · 1 year ago
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REFLECT—Zhongli, regarding fight with Azhdaha or Guizhong’s death
Send REFLECT for me to explain a traumatic event in my muse’s past and talk about their perception of events ★ @underxworlder ★ Accepting
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{OH BOY HERE WE GO...
Gonna go with Guizhong bc it's what I'm most familiar with/feel like I'd be able to articulate my/his thoughts on it better.
Never in his long, long life would Morax ever think he'd formulate such a bond with anyone. He was a war god, intent on slaughter and conquering, not on alliances and relations. That is, until one day amongst a field of Glaze Lillies, did he meet a fellow god. Guizhong. Someone his complete opposite in her benevolence and eagerness to learn about the humans. The very god who helped him formulate his beloved Liyue into the prosperous nation it was today. And perhaps most importantly, the woman who managed to wear down his heart of stone. Teaching him little by little how valuable humans and their emotions were, how not everything is won by bloodshed and violence, and just how important kindness itself was.
Him feeling a strange twinge in his soul upon witnessing how joyful she became hearing him gain more understanding of humans. How surprisingly entertaining it was, watching her work on her latest invention, how he actually smiled when around her.
At first, he tried to ignore it, thinking of it as a weakness. A god such as himself shouldn't get this attached to someone. Much less a war god. How he was allowing her to mold him into a gradually kinder being, it was something he should have resisted much strongly than he had. Yet... why did he protect her so fiercely, why did he allow himself to teach her combat, why did he feel this warmth in his chest whenever he saw her? A solace, she easily became, from all the fighting he took part in.
Then, the Archon War struck. And with it, came chaos and bloodshed.
He couldn't find her. The almighty Morax feeling fear seep into his being and cage him in a vice. Impossible. Gods shouldn't, can't, won't feel any form of fear. But this was Guizhong he couldn't find. It was then, then of all times, he realized. What he felt for her went beyond simple alliances, beyond even friendship. The desperate calling of her name as he searched told that well enough.
He found her. In a field of Glaze Lillies. The resemblance to their first meeting was agonizing.
Anger, was his first emotion. The gnawing desire to rip apart whomever gave her any wounds or pain. They deserved it-
It was her weakly saying his name that snapped him out of it. Like it always did before. Returning him to reality as he used the very hands the wielded a spear with beastly aggression to gently gather her into his arms.
Forget? No! Forgetting the dumbbell could equate to him forgetting her. Never could or would he do that. He'd have to deny her, just this once.
The unflinching, brutish, unfeeling Morax broke. Like carving a stone in half, he wailed and begged her. "Don't leave, Liyue still needs you- I still need you!" The earth was covered in dust regardless of the Geo god's pleas. The Glaze Lillies wilting alongside her.
Grief gave way to outright fury. Fissures, boulders, spear strikes. That was how Morax showed his grief masked by violence. Tears cascading as he fought his way through. Falling onto his knees once it all was done, only his spear supporting him where she once did.}
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hflifestylesg · 2 months ago
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Exercise Equipment: A Comprehensive Overview
Introduction
Exercise equipment are items or appliances used in physical activities that assist in making exercise more effective, more strength-gaining, or exercising one's cardiovascular system and enhancing one's flexibility. Among the many items designed for this sort of purpose are simple objects such as dumbbells and resistance bands to more complex machines like treadmills and rowing machines. 
Types include strength training equipment (barbells, kettlebells) - ideal for building strength in specific muscles, cardiovascular machines (ellipticals and stationary bikes) - useful for working out a person's cardiovascular system, and pieces of equipment for flexibility (yoga mats, stability balls).
Benefits of Using Exercise Equipment
Improved Strength and Endurance
The application of resistance using equipment such as dumbbells, barbells, and resistance bands enables one to build, and strengthen the muscles and increase endurance. If done consistently over time, it causes hypertrophy and an increase in strength, enabling one to take up heavier weights or a higher number of reps progressively without stagnation in progressive resistance training.
Enhanced Cardiovascular Health
There are cardio-payne machines such as treadmills, stationary bicycles, and ellipticals that ensure the heart rate goes up during workouts thus enhancing the health of the heart. The use of such equipment improves blood flow, reduces high blood levels, and increases the efficiency of breathing through the lungs, thereby eliminating or minimizing the occurrence of heart-related diseases such as heart attacks and strokes over time.
Customizable Workouts
The adjustment levels of the exercise equipment can be easily varied, allowing the workouts to fit the fitness levels and the objectives of the individual. As such, activities such as a treadmill allow one to increase the speed or incline, while a weight machine may allow a user to reduce the amount of effort in a weight press machine making workouts more effective and tailored.
Increased Flexibility and Balance
Balance and flexibility-enhancing items such as stability balls and yoga mats facilitate stretching and core strengthening. These items help control and strengthen the muscles, improve one’s posture, and help in injury prevention through flexibility, coordination, and core strengthening which are essential for the overall physical stability and movements.
Convenience and Privacy
Owning gym equipment at home is a time-saver as it eliminates the need to travel to a gym for workouts. It also encourages users as there are no limitations, such as the necessity for an audience, whereby one can comfortably work out in a given location. 
Efficient Calorie Burn
Exercise Machines like cardio machines and strength training machines, because they burn more calories as it intensifies the workout. Walking on a treadmill or the weights can burn more calories, hence translating to weight loss, losing fats, and improving their general metabolic health.
Reduced Risk of Injury
A leg press or chest press machine will guide a movement so proper form is assured, and that reduces the chance of injury. In reality, such machines are sturdier and more controlled than free weights, so for newbies or patients who have already suffered an injury, it is safer, yet still delivers great results.
Types of Exercise Equipment
1. Stationary Exercise Machines
These are treadmills, ellipticals, and stationary bikes. They are indoors-based in nature to allow for low-impact workouts that are controlled to attain cardiovascular endurance and greater levels of fitness.
2. Resistance Bands
These bands are usually made from rubber, lightweight, easy to carry, but variable in terms of resistance, thus making them ideal for strength training while versatile as they can be used in various muscles with different intensities.
3. Stability Balls
Stability balls are large inflatable balls, used to enhance balance and core strength. They support exercises such as crunches, planks, and stretches that recruit muscles in unusual ways.
4. Dumbbell Weights
Dumbbells are free weights that vary in weight. They can be used in isolation and compound exercises because they can target a particular set of muscles with specificity.
5. Jump Rope
Jump rope is a great tool for cardio and agility, and it might make anyone burn calories and improve coordination to develop cardiovascular endurance in a very short period.
6. Yoga Mat
Floor exercises require to be cushioned and gripped by yoga mats to enhance comfort while doing any activity such as yoga, stretching, or Pilates. These also work in balancing the weights while on bodyweight exercises.
Tips for Choosing the Right Exercise Equipment
Set a Budget: The cost of exercise equipment also varies very broadly, so begin with the least expensive needs for you, such as a jump rope, some resistance bands, or maybe some dumbbells, and gradually work your way up into larger machines if necessary.
Assess Durability and Quality: Invest in high-quality equipment made from the best materials. Cheap and low-quality equipment will not last long, sometimes quickly break, and in the worst case, creates unsafe conditions.
Check for Adjustable Resistance or Weight: Choose equipment that can aid you in increasing resistance or weight. Some examples may include adjustable dumbbells or resistance bands with varying levels of tension.
Ease of Use: The equipment should be easy to use. Complex machines may make people shy away from using them because of the complex operating requirements, while simple items like a yoga mat or jump rope can be easily inserted into daily routines.
Read Reviews and Test If Possible: Firstly, before you decide to buy some equipment read reviews, or test the equipment in a store so that you'll know whether it is going to meet your needs. Read user reviews: they might be very insightful about the performance of the product.
FAQs
Can I use exercise equipment at home effectively?
Home-based workouts can be just as effective as those at the gym; you can fashion an excellent well-rounded routine with the following pieces of equipment: the dumbbells, the jump rope, and the resistance bands.
Do I need expensive equipment for a good workout?
No, you can work out well with minimal equipment like resistance bands, dumbbells, or even just a jump rope. Focus on form, consistency, and progressively challenging your body.
Conclusion
Exercises are to be chosen with several considerations: the nature of the fitness objectives, the availability of space, and the budget. For cardiovascular issues, muscle building, or flexibility, different options are available to cater to the individual needs of each person. A more well-rounded program of exercise usually incorporates a combination of all these categories.
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myrefersofficial · 2 years ago
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To 10 Gadgets For An Active Lifestyle
The universe of fitness gadgets is extensive. There is immense progress in exercise-related technology in recent years. Plenty of brilliant ideas will help you work up a sweat, fine-tune your muscle mass, and aid your recovery. Whether you're a newbie runner interested in smartwatches or a crossfit adherent trying to optimise your full-body workout, we've scoured the market to bring you the perfect gear you can use.
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Of course, these accessories are best used to supplement your manual gym kit repository (rowers, electric dumbbells, etc.). Still, electronic aid can go a long way. In several conditions, it may be possible to cut costs overall by using the services of a personal trainer or by choosing these better lifestyle gadgets. The fitness equipment that you can use to develop a superhuman body includes lots of equipment.
These equipment can range from smart exercise bikes and rowing machines to fitness monitors that have the ability to fine-tune your strength training. Our fitness and lifestyle experts have gone through several products on Amazon and other ecommerce websites to come up with these top 10 gadgets for an active and amazing lifestyle. Here is a rundown of everything you need to have awesome health.
Top 10 Gadgets For A Better Lifestyle
1. The Hydrow Rower
While the Hydrow is more than simply a fitness device, we couldn't resist including it. The Hydrow is a unique spin on the rowing machine. With the 22-inch HD screen, you'll be able to row digitally on waterways worldwide, providing an immersive exercise experience. The machine offers over 2,000 live and on-demand workouts with instructor-led programs (from yoga to Pilates) beyond rowing.
2.  Fitbit Versa 4 Fitness Smartwatch
Improve your training outcomes with the all-new Versa 4 + Premium. With your daily Readiness Score of 1, you'll know when you're up for a challenge and when you need a rest day. With 40+ workout modes, you can track more activities right from your wrist. Choose from weight training, HIIT, running, and kayaking methods to observe crucial outcomes in real-time, such as Active Zone Minutes.
It displays your desired intensity levels. Do it all while wearing a thin, lightweight fitness smartwatch built for comfort during workouts, sleep, and other activities. Plus, you'll never miss a beat with calls, messages, and notifications on your wrist and a battery life of 6+ days. A 6-month Fitbit Premium membership is included while buying this exclusive smartwatch.
3. X21 Walking Pad
If you don't have enough floor space at home, investing in your treadmill can be a huge sacrifice. That's why we're smitten with the WalkingPad X21, which folds neatly away, so it doesn't take up too much space in your home. It's best suited to a mix of light jogging and strolling, with a 121 cm length running belt and a top speed of 12 km/h. As long as it meets your workout requirements, this is a novel way to ensure you never skip cardio again.
4. Myzone MZ-Switch
The MZ-Switch is the best heart rate monitor for exercise enthusiasts seeking versatility. You can wear the heart rate monitor on your chest, arm, or wrist thanks to three different straps, allowing you to choose the most comfortable and practical alternative. While it includes an iOS and Android app, you can also use its built-in light indicator to keep track of your fitness zone. The six-month battery life per charge is also okay.
5. Bike Peloton+
The original Peloton revolutionised working out at home on a stationary bike. The latest product offers many innovative features to tempt people to bike in their living rooms. A breakthrough new form of resistance training known as "Auto-Follow" uses goal metrics as its foundation. A revolving high-definition screen makes it easier to move between floor-based workouts and cycle routines, and it automatically adjusts itself to what your instructor wants you to do. It works with the Apple Watch, so all of your carefully compiled stats can be shown in one place.
6. Theraface Professional
You've probably heard of the Theragun, the percussive massage guns that pound away at your post-workout aches and sore places. Because no one in their right mind would put one of those near their jawline, the TheraFace Pro was created expressly for the task. It gently relaxes your 40 face muscles and has many other revitalising functions, including LED light therapy and a cleansing brush. A truly impressive piece of wellness equipment.
7. URPOWER Essential Oil Diffuser
This second-generation essential oil diffuser from URPOWER offers calming wetness and aroma to whatever room it is placed in, making it a top option and the ideal present for someone who enjoys creating an atmosphere with all five senses. The diffuser is the ideal method to improve your area, with seven distinct lamp colour options. The misting it provides will last up to six hours.
8. Personal Water Filter LifeStraw
A water filter is essential for hiking, camping, or backpacking excursions. According to the manufacturer, this model filters up to 1,000 gallons of water while removing 99.99% of bacteria and parasites and exceeding EPA filter criteria. With each LifeStraw purchased, the company will send safe drinking water to a child in need for a full school year so that you can feel good about your purchase. The personal water filter is lightweight and easy to pack, weighing only 2 pounds and suitable for both day trips and week-long excursions.
9. Max XL Cosori Air Fryer
This air fryer is obvious whether you're purchasing for a culinary enthusiast or someone who wants to eat a little healthier. It has an angled display, and simple presets that make cooking easy no matter what's in your pantry. While maintaining that delightful comfort food flavour, the air fryer uses up to 85% less fat than typically deep-fried foods1. The dishwasher-safe and BPA-free removable nonstick basket makes cleanup as simple as eating!
10. Lumen
Lumen, which looks like a futuristic vape pen, is the world's first hand-held device to evaluate your metabolism correctly. Inhale through it, hold your breath for 10 seconds, and then exhale to measure the CO2 concentration in your breath. Higher levels suggest that your body utilises carbohydrates for energy, whereas lower levels indicate that fat is utilised. It keeps track of your body's fuel and provides nutrition suggestions based on your CO2 range and lung capacity. A great companion for folks on low-carb diets like keto, athletes, and anyone looking to speed up their weight-loss journey.
Conclusion
These gadgets can help you improve your lifestyle and provide an active life. Also, this is not the end. Several gadgets are continuously making your life easier. At MyRefers, we regularly research gadgets and several other options for making your life fun and easy. Enjoy reading and stay connected for more informative blogs. Original source: https://myrefersofficial.blogspot.com/2023/01/to-10-gadgets-for-active-lifestyle.html
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bwompbomp · 3 years ago
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Diffidence
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" i like you, but don't like me. "
intro - absurd. absurd how some people just have it all. looks, brains, who wouldn't want to approach and befriend someone like that? who wouldn't want to stick close, get to know them more since they have such a friendly smile that lures you closer?
character - Zhongli x reader
genre - fluff (angst if u squint)
warnings - cursing, insecurity issues, long-ish read? (2.8k wc), toxic tendencies, gn!reader
diffidence masterlist
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it's always that time of the year.
chocolates, flowers, gifts, poems, and many more others wrapped with careful hands and gifted with unspoken feelings. you get to see them being given around, or being shown off to their peers like a once-in-a-blue-moon trophy.
several confessions being blurted in the corners of the campus, and couples happily spending their time with each other, basking on the love that they share. they're practically everywhere, its beginning to feel like an eyesore everytime they mind their own business and hold hands within their own world, hushing words of burning passion that it's quite the irony your ears still manage to pick it up.
it further screams that this special day is Valentines with the school organizing love-related events, along with all the pink ribbons decorated across the campus, surrounded by a masquerade of hearts and kisses.
with this kind of atmosphere, you'll be reeled in to mutter your own confessions, no?
your face deadpans at your thoughts. 'absolutely not. what are you even going to confess, your sins?'
'where are your friends anyway?'
'oh sorry. friend.'
so you text her, your only friend (for now!!!), asking her where in the devil she's supposed to be since you two agreed to meet at 3.
(its actually because the atmosphere was suffocating you with the smell of the sweetness ranging from chocolates to their mouths muttering words like honey and sugar.)
it's just, a little bit annoying to have couples in every nook and cranny of the school like it's some trend.
then again, it kinda is.
it is that time of the year.
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deciding to head to the library for your free time, where you know was a place that is certainly quiet, you opened the doors carefully and breathed a sigh of satisfaction once doing a glance-over inside. seeing that at least people here weren't making kissy faces, you made your way towards an empty table, muttering an 'excuse me' to a tall figure picking a book on your side of the table while hurriedly rummaging through your bag.
*thud*
you closed your eyes when you felt an ache and a tear escape your eye. smiling, you glanced to the towering fellow, who you just passed by. he who trailed his eyes towards the book, which was now on the floor, and he who dropped to his knees to grab the fallen book, gaze never leaving the object that he dropped from failing to hold said object properly. he didn't even acknowledge you.
did..did he maybe not notice? you reasoned with yourself to try and understand him. maybe..maybe the book he was gonna read was as heavy as dumbbells? or maybe his grip is just that weak? you rub the spot that was aching on your head while smiling. you face at the man with your beam, at least expecting an apology from your poor head who had to suffer a fall from such a thick book. what even, is that an encyclopedia or something??
the man in a black long-sleeved polo sighs with relief once successfully obtaining his book. though, with your intense stare, he finds his eyes brushing past you and your uh, smile, yet he averts quickly, intent on avoiding from conversing right now. your smile grows wider.
going back on where he originally was with book in hand, you presume his seat, you gripped your bag tightly, feeling your stomach do flips. it's just going to be a talk! surely's hes not a bully and will just say sorry, right? you purse your lips. you made your way slowly to his direction and you cant help but panic internally. should you really bother a stranger because they didnt apologize? your brain says so, but..
perhaps it was because due to you making a slugging beeline towards his table that he turns his head to you, asking you what's wrong. you muttered 10 curses at once, coming out as a whole bunch of gibberish before praying that he didnt hear anything of that (he did) and straightened yourself up.
you blinked, noticing that he looks hot. wow. incredibly hot. his golden amber eyes contrasted his dark casual fashion, complimenting his whole refined gentleman look. not to mention his glasses adding more to his charm? damn, you felt a little intimidated by his sexy aura that you had to gulp, reminding yourself why you're in front of him in the first place.
if this was fate pulling its strings on a romance novel, you would've stared a bit longer, admiring his good looks with a blush. batting your eyelashes like an idiot, you look at him bashfully, with flowers suddenly blooming and the wind making an extravagant entrance on the scene. with sparkling eyes, you tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear, coyly shimmering closer towards his direction...
but it isn't.
you sucked in a breath, slapping yourself to reality while he stared at you suddenly halting your movements once you made contact with his picturesque face. with an embarrassed smile, you pointed towards his gloved hand holding the book. "hey! i don't know if you noticed, but that book you're holding fell on top of my head earlier." you tell him, your smile never vanishing from your face.
it took almost all your dignity when he just stood there, staring at you. this would've been a fierce battle of a staring contest and you would've taken this more seriously, as a proper challenge, had it not been that you two are strangers. this hurts, is this his payback for you staring at him too?
"it did?"
oh. oh thank god. "it did, it did."
"ah." he turned to you, facing you directly with concerned eyes before looking at your head. "i must beg your pardon for the late apologies. my attention was diverted to a problem that was being an inconvenience. is your head doing alright?"
wow. mhm. his voice is silky smooth too.
"it will be soon, but thanks!" you sheepishly smile at him, rubbing your head, before tearing up lightly at the bump created. sending him a light wave afterwards, you head to the table you were at, glancing at your watch. ah, its almost time for your friend to be here. took her long enough. nevermind reading then.
you pack your stuff quietly, making a mental note to continue reading your pocket book later. swinging your bag on your shoulder, you pushed your chair back, but turned around at the sound of someone clearing their throat. to your surprise, it was the same guy earlier.
"would you mind if i escort you to the nurse's office?" you opened your mouth to decline, but seeing how he had his bag on his shoulder already while guiltily smiling at you, you giggled at his offer, bobbing your head yes.
on the way to the infirmary with this (hot) gentleman by the name of zhongli, people around you couldn't help but glance, stare even. well you really can't blame them, but you shriveled at the tiny attention. you just hope this wasn't gonna start up a rumor soon..
regarding zhongli, he was a senior transferee this school year, which absolutely baffles you since you didn't know him. you guys are already finishing up your first sem and you didn't even know there were transferees. did he not show up at the collective assembly? well, you didn't really give enough shits to bother who transfers and who stays to look around some familiar faces anyway.
weeks passed when you guys met, with you always being at his receiving end of help. whether it's by studying, by hogging some answers with little to no effort of bargaining (because he always just gives it anyway, save from the mini remindings he does to you), to you forgetting your things, and him miraculously always having what you needed. its almost like he knew you had short-term memory. amazing isn't he?
but then, it goes to you internally suffering from him sometimes (always) not bringing his wallet, (crazy thing is, once he does bring his wallet it was always just..not enough...), then to him asking you to be partners with him, or just join in any class-related project that needed groups with him, and..
um, that's it.
yeah haha, what a fair give and take situation. hey, its not your fault he isn't as clumsy as you are. but at least you get to experience what it's like to get higher grades. your bond with him certainly went deeper as weeks turned to months, with you chatting away your interests on the literature of books. with the library being your usual hanging-out spot, you both discuss trivial matters that range from the cliche plots, to the vast types of art people use to express their imagination. with each of you clashing each other's weapons with your opinions, it almost felt like an internal debate.
maybe it's because all you've been seeing is your friend's face these past few years, but with zhongli around, you find yourself spilling almost anything that pops up in your mind due to him never failing to catch onto the topics you open up.
and of course, that didn't fail to make you question yourself. putting a hand unconsciously on your chest, you purse your lips once you realized the way your stomach feels like you did flips, the way your cheeks flushes a little bit more, the way you always seem to look for him when his class is mentioned, and the way your chest tightens, it hurts..
and since you think he's too out of your league, that you're pushing your luck just by being friends with him, that he probably doesn't even think of you like that, you smile. it's fine. you'll get over it. you always do.
"have you read the book i recently pointed to you?" you looked up at him, and he adjusts his glasses in return. "on that subject, i finished it at home. you were absolutely correct, the author has a great talent of making us readers feel exactly how they want us to feel, and the way they worded each chapter and scenes was really breath-taking." he shuffles through his bag and places the book on the table, smiling. "the plot was quite anguishing, and while i ponder what would've been the case if the book had a happy ending, im satisfied with the way as it is now. it certainly sparked my interest with pocket books, so i'd like to express my gratitude for recommending this to me, y/n."
you flashed him a small smile. "wow, we've been friends for a while but i still can't get how you don't get a headache from the amount of fancy words you've been using. does sound like my influence is getting to you though." you giggle at him, cheeks flushed. "i'm glad you liked it. let me know if you want me to recommend you some more." he nods, sharing your grin, before rearranging his things. as your grin became a lazy smile, you let your thoughts slip out so naturally out of your mouth as you always do,
"reading stories like these, it makes me feel so happy for the two of them, for them to overcome all those problems and live their lives so happily, growing stronger like that." his eyes bore your relaxed posture. "it's amazing, how any type of problem can change a person, and how it pushes them to have courage to do more things, to experience more things...like liking, or even deeper, loving."
"well, humans are resilient, no?" you laugh. "you say that as if you aren't one yourself." he chuckles in return. "well, yeah...i guess." his gaze continues to linger on your unreadable expression, finding it outlandish. his hand brushes on yours before fondling it, a habit he developed to get your attention to him. ah, he's doing it again. stop, don't blush, you'll make it obvious.
you directed your eyes on both of your hands, reading his action as worry. you want to pull away. its okay. calm down. this is normal for him. "ah no no, i'm fine. it's just that, i envy that. i envy them." ..and yet, you didn't find the heart to swat his hands away. with how fast your heart was beating, he'd think you're having a heart attack. you caress his hands back. it's fine. some friends also do these. "..at the same time though, im happy for them, like a cheerleader on a court, or those crowds that surround a stage. they're amazing at what they're doing, and you can see that, but you just can't help but envy them." don't hope for more. stop assuming.
he blinks at you. "what is it that you envy about them?" don't dare dream of anything. you know you don't have a chance regardless, you're too ugly.
you pause, zhongli's question rendering you quiet. you knew best why you felt envious, but you didn't want him to know that something trivial like this bothers you. he already knows how careless you are, you're not gonna add another in your list of failures. you forced a smile, "well you know...they're strong. they had the courage to say whatever they felt, and for that, i commend them."
"do you have someone you like?"
you've failed at hiding your emotions again, because hearing that made you accidentally squeeze his hands a little tighter than you should've. fuck. you blew your cover, dumbass. "ah, sorry." you made an attempt to let his hand go, but he gripped it back, and you looked at him in surprise. "i also apologize, but is something bothering you y/n?"
there is. you couldn't stop staring at his eyes, his eyes that hold so much care, so much- too much, that it scares you to think, to think that what if he held love in those instead? what if, per chance, he harbored the same feelings that you did? no, of course he won't, what are you even thinking?? you face down, overwhelmed. you pursed your lips. "....i don't know." you close your eyes, fearing he might hear your voice tremble. you like him. you squeezed his hands, trying to find the strength not to cry. you like him and..
zhongli squeezes your hands back, urging you to keep going. ...and you want him to know. so bad. "it's somewhat frustrating you know? i want to get rid of this envy, solve it somehow, because i felt ugly, like a bad person. it feels as if i want them to not be happy with whatever they're doing, but i just..." you falter, you're scared.
...but you're scared, scared if he turns away because.... "it doesn't make sense." he nods, still intently listening. "and it feels like shit, because i know that i don't have a chance and-" your voice fails you. you want to bolt up and have a breather. you might break down here, and no, you don't want him to utter the cursed words out of pity. you'll hate yourself even more.
....he might realize how ugly you are.
"then, how about being in a relationship?" your eyes snap to his response. "if you're distressed by this feeling you get whenever you see or read couples, then how would you like it if you were, per chance, on their shoes?" you look at him, his suggestion ringing on your mind. "hopefully then, the reason why you're such in a discomfort will identify itself so that you can feel satisfied?"
"thats..." you mumbled, the idea of being in a relationship seems so far away for you, though you forced a smile. if only we were in a real one instead. you chuckled, "pray tell zhongli. who'll be in a relationship with me anyway?"
with the times you've bonded with zhongli, you always felt like a child next to him, and it bothered you since it was akin to you being a burden to him. you always felt like he already knew what to do in various situations, either complicated or not, even those that he's encountered for the first time in his life. he's the composed one between the two of you most of the time, as if he never made mistakes, impossible that may sound like. and then there's you, imperfect in every way.
so when you saw zhongli's face morph into an alienated expression, his breath hitching, seeming to be hesitating, you blinked. you watch as he pursed his lips tightly, before inhaling in and holding your gaze with a fire that looked firm, a gaze you never really see from him. your chest couldn't help but beat irrationally in exchange,
"if i said-" he squeezed your hands. "if i said, that i'd gladly assist you, would you allow me?"
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a/n - gosh its so long. i do hope you enjoyed the read though, it has been a while since ive done this sort of thing so apologies if it was bad.
likes and reblogs are appreciated! drink and eat ur shit, i hope u enjoyed ur read <3
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hoseokisgucci · 4 years ago
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You Lift Me Up
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GENRE: Fluff and Smut
WORD COUNT: 5K
PAIRING: Taehyung x Reader
SUMMARY: Taetae here sees OC at the gym, one day helps her out a little when she gets injured and somehow ends up in her bed. 
WARNING: Tbh there’s some oral in there (fem receiving), some body worship, a lil of undiscovered kinks showing a sneak peek, penetrative sex, a little dialogue heavy, Taehyung being softboi max. 
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I originally uploaded this without the smut, but then deleted it, and now I’m putting it up again because I finally got around to finishing it. I definitely wanted to write something gym related because its my safe space but I really also wanted to make it soft because IM AN IDIOT FOR PEOPLE FALLING IN LOVE/FINDING THEIR PEOPLE. 
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“How different would it be anyways? I’ll just ask someone for help if I need it. It’s not like I’ll be abandoned by everyone just because I don’t have a partner.”
 “Hey! We didn’t abandon you!! We have exams. Our university made you lonely, not us.” Your friend squawked over the phone.
 Taking advantage of this new found chink in her armor, you added, “Yes. An institution is more important than I am. I see how it is. Hungry, partner-less and overcome with despair. That’s my life now.”
 She huffed, and you could just imagine her shaking her head at you. “You’re a heathen. I’ll buy you food. Now bye. Duty calls.”
 You laughed out an affirmative and slid the phone into the side pocket of your gym bag. The university gym was located close to your dorms, which made it easier for you to haul your ass to the gym even on your lazy days. You were already wondering what it would be like without a partner. You always had friends with you at the gym, be it one or two. You never had to worry about spotting or support ever before, but now these questions crossed your mind. Scenarios where you dropped a dumbbell on your toe or worse, your face flashed before your eyes. You shuddered when a haunting crack resounded in your ears, the sound reminding you to be wary of heavy lifting while you were on your own.
 Getting started on your workout was easy enough. A little warmup here, a bit of running and cycling there. The music pumping through your ears helped you keep up the pace as you cycled, body starting to sweat, lips mouthing the words of the song playing through your earphones. When you hit the 15-minute mark, you figured it would be alright to cycle for 5 more minutes. 
Just as the song changed, and you looked down to check if the lever for your seat was proper, your heart came up to your throat as someone tapped you. With your hand over your heart, legs coming to a stop, you turned to see the most gorgeous man ever. Scratch that. The most gorgeous being ever.
 Lost in your head, you only came to when you realized that his lips were supposed to be forming coherent sentences. That were aimed at you. Raising your hand, your palm faced towards him, you said, “Wait, I can’t hear you.”  His lips grimaced, as if embarrassed and he nodded his head. When you turned off your music, paused your timer and turned to look at him, torso twisting in his direction, his eyes quickly snapped to yours, as if he wasn’t just checking out the swell of your ass perched on the tiny cycle seat. You raised your brows at him, which probably kickstarted his brain again. He gulped and said,
 “How long will you take?”
  You were about to retort and tell him that there were other cycles too, but when you turned the other way, you saw that all of them were occupied.
 “Maybe around 4 more minutes.” He nodded in response, gave a quick smile, and when he was about to turn away, you tapped his hand, grabbing his attention once more. You didn’t know why you felt good, having those eyes on you. You were probably going crazy, you imagination making you see the electricity in them.
 Rethinking about your situation, you said, “Actually, I’ll get off. I was just going to do some extra cycling, but you can get started.”
 He shook his head, curly hair bouncing around as he said, “No no, please take your time. I’ll just stretch some while you’re getting done.”
 You nodded your head and smiled at him, hoping that he could understand how grateful you were. You got back to cycling, starting up the movement of your legs once again. Without the music to keep you occupied your eyes wandered to the mirror in front of you. As you scanned your surroundings, you noticed the guy from before, stretching his arms, gazed fixed on your form. The intensity with which he kept looking at you almost made your legs flounder, but you concentrated on maintaining your momentum.
 Sighing inwardly, your eyes moved backed to him. He hadn’t noticed you looking at him, because he wasn’t focused on your face, but rather your ass. Wanting to add fuel to the fire, you stuck your ass out a little more and arched your back a little more, making your body look a little more tantalizing. As you did this, you could see his eyes widen a little, hands now hanging limp. You discreetly kept looking at him, and could see him scan your form, his gaze focusing on your face. You cycled a bit more aggressively, the motion moving you from side to side. 
If he was watching, you might as well give him a good show. When you eyed him again, he was bent over, legs spread wide, hands touching the ground, stretching. But his eyes, they didn’t leave you, or rather, your butt, even once.
 Your timer beeped, signaling the end of your 20 minutes. You slowed down your legs and sat there, catching your breath. When you looked at yourself in the mirror, your cheeks were flushed, sweat dotting your forehead and your face glistened. You looked thoroughly wrecked. He was still looking at you. You got off the cycle, walked to him and said, “Its all yours.”
 He nodded, and you walked away. You breezed through the rest of the workout, mind occupied with thoughts of big hands and one beautiful man.
  Through the next week, you kept seeing him at the gym, on a machine or doing a rep. You weren't ignoring him, per se, but what the hell would you go and say to him? "Hey I think you're pretty hot, come over and choke me?"
 Definitely not.
 A week without a partner goes by with no problems, but its like your beginner luck in the world of solo exercising has run out when you lose your balance while doing weighted squats. Even before starting the set, you were a bit worried, because the rod itself weighed 32 kgs, and you had added plates of 10 kgs. You never imagined that you'd get injured at the gym out of all places but, alas! Your time had come. When you felt that you had no control over the bar and your body anymore, you tried to brace yourself for impact, but two hands lifted the bar off of your shoulders, which allowed your body to gain some balance. When you looked at the mirror, you saw cycle dude holding the bar in his hands. You quickly turned around and helped him rack it.
With frantic eyes, he scans your body for any apparent injuries and asks,
 "Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere?"
 "Uh no, I don’t think so. Just that, my knee might be a little sprained."
 His eyes focus on your knee, hands out in front of him, ready to support you. You start walking, but you can feel a slight tinge in your right knee when you put pressure on it. The discomfort might show on your face, because he wraps your arm around his shoulder, and urges you to put your weight on him. He walks you to the bench and sits you down, your leg extended in front of you.
Squatting near your leg, fingers brushing the hair our of his eyes and off of his forehead, he asks,
"Can you call someone to take you home?"
 You take a minute to think if there's anyone who actually could take you home at this moment. And you come up with no one. You tell him so.
 Tentatively, eyes now darting here and there, he says
 "Uh, would you mind if I dropped you off?"
  You blurt out, "Why?"
 "Huh?"
 "Why would you do that? You don't even know me."
 "Well I, uh, might have a small crush on you. Not in a creepy way! I just think you're kinda cute. And I would feel better if I knew you'd get home safely."
  Welp. That's kinda endearing.
  "Okay. Let's go."  
 He asks for your locker number, goes and gets both of your bags and comes to get you. For a few minutes, you walk with your arm around his
 shoulder, half of your weight held up by him. Your pace is probably slower than a snail, what with you trying to clumsily hop and him trying to support you. He stops and says,
 "Okay, let's get you on my back. You can point in what direction you wanna go and I'll carry you. It'll be faster and way better for you."
 You try to protest but he's already hanging both of your bags around his neck and getting on his haunches in front of you, hands ready to hold your legs. So you climb on.
As he starts walking, he says,
"I'm Taehyung by the way, your beloved servant."
 "Well, my dear servant, you shall call me princess then," you cheekily reply as you tighten your hold around his neck.
 He laughs and shakes his head, huffing out, "Wow, the audacity."
 "I'm sorry. Thank you so much, I'll be indebted to you forever. You're too kind," you sincerely say to him.
 He just hums in response, so you leave it at that. Your dorm building isn't that far, so you make it there in no time. You get in the lift, and once it opens on your floor, you tell Taehyung your dorm number.
 You tell him your door code, and he walks you in, going straight to your couch and sitting you down. He takes the bags from his neck and puts them aside. Next, he takes off your shoes and puts them near your door.
 "Okay, do you mind if I check your fridge? Is there anything like an icepack? To put on your knee?"
 "Yeah, there is an ice pack."
 He grabs the ice pack, fills it with ice cubes and holds it on your knee. The freezing sensation
 sends a twinge down your knee. He urges you to hold the ice pack and goes to the kitchen. When he comes back, he presses a glass of water to your lips, and you drink.
 Once you're done, he sets the glass on the coffee table, and settles beside you, grabbing your leg and gently getting it on his lap, urging you to lie down, with your head resting on the armrest. He holds your leg with one hand, and tenderly ices your knee with the other. The action makes you relax your body, all the stress unwinding. Taehyung doesn't say anything, his eyes concentrated on your knee. Feeling the pain in your knee numbing, you close your eyes.
 The next thing you know, Taehyung in shaking you awake, calling out your name in his low baritone. When you gain some semblance of consciousness, the first thing that you register is the fragrance of food. Your stomach grumbles, and Taehyung chuckles at you. He helps you sit up, and shoves a takeout box in your hand. You thank him and dig in. Once you're done, he cleans up and comes back to sit beside you.
 "How are you feeling now?"
 You flex your leg a little, and when it doesn't hurt that bad, you say, "It feels better.  I'll just take a painkiller and knock out."
 He nods his head, hand reaching out to feel over and around your knee. After being satisfied, he rests his hand on your knee, and looks at you. "I'm glad. Just be careful."
 In a moment of courage, you rest your hand over his and say,
"I can't thank you enough. For getting me home, taking care of me, feeding me."
 His eyes crinkle as he smiles, and he rests his other hand over yours, your palm now sandwiched between two of his. He leans closer to you, and whispers,
 "You don't have to thank me, doll. But I can think of a few things you could do."
 The way he says these words makes tingles run up your spine, the intent clear in eyes, made clearer by his words. You close your eyes and lean back on the sofa, knowing that Taehyung's eyes are fixed on you. The knowledge that this kind, breathtakingly beautiful man has a crush on you, and moreover wants you, gives you the confidence to act a little, if not more coy. With your head now tilted towards the ceiling and your eyes closed, you channel your inner heathen and say,
"And what would they be, hmm?"
When you hear him suck a breath in beside you, you smirk inwardly. You wait for him to say something, but he just retracts his hands from yours. This action makes you open your eyes and tilt your head to look at him, question clear in your gaze.
Just as you're about to sit up and say something, you're hit with a face full of Taehyung, and suddenly his palms are grabbing your face and his lips are on yours. The shock makes your eyes widen, but as you register what's going on, your eyes close and your hand fists his shirt as you kiss him back.
Taehyung's lips feel way better than you could ever imagine, and the warmth seeping into your skin from his palms makes this experience feel real, and not just fantasy. When his lips suck on your lower lip a little harder, you arch your back, your upper body lifting off the couch. This makes him slide one hand off of your cheek and around your waist, and he pulls your body closer to his.
At this point, he's basically straddling you. When his tongue probes your mouth, one of your hands grab the back of his hair and pull. The low groan he lets out as you disconnect from his mouth and start sucking on his neck makes you quiver, the thought of hearing the same baritone in your ear as he pounds into you making you want him even more. He parts from you, and as he sits up, your hands leave his body.
 "What do you want?"
 You bite your lip, and instead of answering, one of your hand rises to his waistband. Instantly, his hand grips yours, and as he smiles, he leans down to kiss your palm. Against it, he whispers,
"Want me to eat you out? Wanna cum on my tongue?"
You gulp at the thought of this man between your legs, and nod at him. Something in his face hardens, and he drops your hand, only to lean over you and grip your chin.
"Use your words, baby doll. What do you say?"
You maintain eye contact with him and whisper,
"Yes."
Though your answer makes him loosen his grip on your jaw, only makes him move closer to you.
 "Yes what?"
 "Yes sir."
 At your answer, Taehyung's eyes widen, and then a smirk spreads across his face. His hands urge you out of your top, and he throws it over his shoulder, uncaring as to where it lands. 
His eyes take you in, and in a second he's getting off you and pulling your leggings and underwear down your body. You struggle a little to lift your ass off the couch, a little pain shooting through your knee at the pressure. Taehyung makes you rest your injured leg straight on the coffee table. After making sure you're comfortable, he leans down you kiss you, on of his hands making their way to your tits. When he squeezes and twists a nipple, your body arches off the couch, legs spreading wider.
Once Taehyung's satisfied from claiming your mouth, he gets down on his knees in between your legs. For the first time, you see hesitation cross his eyes as he nibbles his lower lip. You lean up, and say,
"I want you. Please make me cum, please."
A smile blooms on his face, eyes lighting up as his hands move up your thighs. He leans forward, kissing up the inside of your left thigh, his hands squeezing where they hold you. After a few kisses, he suddenly bites, which makes you reach out to grip his hair as you moan.
 Indifferent to your reaction, he moves forward, his hands widening your legs as he comes face to face with your core. Sounding absolutely wrecked, he says,
"Fuck I can't wait to taste you."
With this, he kisses your mound, and then spreads your outer lips.
 "Holy shit, darling, it's all for me, right?"
 You card your hands through his hair as you whisper an affirmative. Happy with your response, Taehyung leans in and envelops your clit in his lips, and sucks. Slowly, he starts making strokes with his tongue, delving deeper. He speeds up the motions of his tongue, now moving it in and out, and puts a finger in your core. The slide is tight, and it makes you both moan. But he doesn't stop, if anything, he gets even more determined. 
Soon, he adds another finger and his tongue moves onto your clit. The added stimulation makes the knot in your core tighten, the arousal pulsing stronger in your veins. He takes his mouth off of your clit with a pop and leans back to see his fingers scissoring as they move inside you. You tilt your head down to take a look at him, and dear God above, he looks wrecked. His hair is all messed up, thanks to your fingers, and his lips are swollen and glistening, and you're pretty sure his chin is too.
 Fuck.
 Your eyes roll to the back of your head as this visual ingrains itself in your eyes, a whimper falling from your mouth as you say,
"Fucking God, please fuck me. Want you so bad, please."
 "I'll think about it if you cum like a good girl first."
  His fingers speed up, and he leans down to capture you clit in his mouth again. This time, he's absolutely brutal with the way he goes at you, nothing gentle about his mouth or his fingers. Just as you feel yourself climbing up to a climax, he adds another finger, his tongue now flicking across your clit.
 As you get closer to the finish line, your moans turn into curse words, your voice getting louder.
 "Fucking Hell, Taehyung, don't stop! Shit! I'm s-so close, please, please, I'm gonna c-cum!"
 Saying nothing Taehyung curves his fingers inside you as he lightly bites on your clit, and that's all it takes for you to let go. Your body pulls taut, legs shaking around him, hips riding his fingers. His fingers and his mouth guide you along your high, and even after you've come down, his mouth still keeps laving over your clit. You moan in oversensitivity and that's when he deems it enough.
 He gets up, but groans out while straightening his legs. You giggle at his facial expression, and he stands over you, hands on his hips, mouth drawn into a pout.
 "I just ate you out but you're laughing at me, huh?"
 This makes you laugh out loud, and you say,
"Can't believe you're a grandpa."
 His mouth falls open, flabbergasted. His mouth tries and fails to form a word, and his mouth just bubbles out a laugh. He's shaking his head as he takes off his tee, and throws it on the couch beside you. Oh you're definitely not laughing now.
 "Well, this grandpa did get you off, baby doll. Now, where's the bedroom?"
 He leans down to pick you up, his hands urging your thighs to wrap around his hips, your arms wrapping around his neck. You hold on tighter when he stands up straight with you in his arms. He leads you to the bedroom, kicking the door open and walking in. He lays you down on the duvet slowly, mindful of jostling your leg. 
Once you're lying on the bed, he goes to get a pillow and puts it below your knee. You make eye contact with him, hoping your smile conveys how grateful you are. He smiles at you, expression shy. Pointing at the bedside table, you say,
"The condoms are in here."
 He raises an eyebrow, but gets a condom and climbs on the bed. Once he's in between your legs, one of his hands knead your thigh, the action relaxing your muscles, making you let out a sigh. Seeing your reaction, he leans down to kiss your tummy, trailing light kisses down to your pelvis.
 "You look so beautiful like this. So lovely."
 His hand glides up your inner thigh, two fingers plunging into you without warning. He pulls out, only to push back in, your soft wet walls accommodating to his ministrations easily. When he doesn't hear you making a sound, he scissors his fingers, and starts sucking a hickey on your hipbone. A shiver runs through you, and you let out a whimper at the sudden influx of stimulus.
 "Such a sweetheart, huh? Always ready to let me know how good I'm making you feel."
 As he says this, he adds another finger, and the added stretch makes you arch off the bed. Soon, Taehyung has you moaning his name, your hands reaching out to hold onto the bedsheet. Taehyung slows down his fingers, and asks you,
 "What do you want? Tell me. Tell me and I'll give it to you."
 The husk in his voice makes you groan, the timber of it sending trills of arousal shooting through you.
 "Want you to fuck me. Now. Right now."
 Pulling his fingers out of you, he whispers, "Then that's what you'll get, baby."
  He takes off his gym shorts and his underwear, his cock standing hard and proud, the tip glistening with precum. While stroking his cock, he says,
"Although everything in me is telling me to fuck you like the devil you are, I don't wanna add to your injuries. So let's have you wrap you legs around me, okay?"
 Actually processing what he said, you try to move your leg, but the twinge of pain has you nodding your head in agreement.
 Seeing your approval, he gives you a smile and tears open the condom. Your eyes trace him as he kneels between your legs. The soft curls falling into his eyes, the slope of his nose, adding to his charm. The strength visible in his shoulders, all the way down to his arms, makes you want things that can only be done behind closed doors. The thoughts of being manhandled, being pushed into the mattress as he takes you run through your head among other lust-filled scenarios, and these make you gulp.
Your eyes follow when he rolls the condom onto himself and strokes his cock in long motions.
 His eyes, fall onto you, and seeing how you're entranced by, well, his dick, he chuckles. The sound makes your eyes flit to his, your cheeks already filling with colour, embarrassment flooding your mind.
 Taehyung doesn't say anything, just urges your legs to wrap around his waist as he leans over you. That one moment of silence, where you and him are just two people, closer than ever, closer than any galaxies, any stars, seems to last for a lifetime. When he slightly smiles, one of his hands coming up to stroke your hair, you feel a storm brewing where you heart is meant to be. You smile back, and then Taehyung is thrusting into you, the stars in his eyes now clouded by lust.
 The first few thrusts are slow, languid and have Taehyung's eyes flitting over your features, looking for any signs of discomfort. But when he finds none, he gains confidence, his hips moving with more purpose, plunging impossibly deeper into you. Your eyes close, head tilting up as your mouth lets out little moans mixed in with whimpers.
 Taehyung's thrusts slow down into him just grinding his cock into you, and he grabs your chin to make you look at him.
 "Look at me, baby. You feel so good, like heaven. Maybe even more divine than heaven itself."
 The sincerity in his eyes as he says this makes your clench around him, throat choking on the words you want to say. You reach out a hand and put it on his shoulder, which makes him pause his movements. Worry flickers across his face as he waits for you to say something.
 "G-go faster. Wanna cum. Right now. Please."
 The worry on Taehyung's face quickly dissolves into cockiness as he positions himself to pound into you better. His smirk grows as his thrust gets a moan out of you. Continuing with his ministrations, he manages to grunt out,
"This good enough for you, doll?"
 When you don't answer him, too busy whimpering, he leans over you and one of his hands reach out and twist your nipple in warning, hips maintaining their momentum.
"Think I asked a question, darling. Come on, now."
 The hand you had on his shoulder moves up to the back of his head, and as your fingers entangle in his locks and pull, you say,
"Yes! Yes! Dear God, yes! F-feel good."
 He doesn't verbally reply to you, but he hums, the low rumble of his voice making you feel some type of way.
 One of his hands land near your head, the other one grabbing your thigh, and its pound town from there. The room fills with the sounds of skin slapping on skin mixed in with Taehyung's grunts and your moans. The boy in between your legs turns into a beast chasing just one thing, and he doesn't slow down. The sound of sex resounds in the room, making you feel downright dirty.
 Your eyes focus on Taehyung's face contorted in pleasure and his body glistening with a sheen of sweat. Maybe it's this realization, that you have this beautiful man fucking into you that pushes you closer to your climax.
When your walls start clenching around him, the ball of fire in the pit of your stomach so close to bursting, one of your hands reach down, two of your fingers rubbing your clit in desperation.
 "That's it. Make yourself cum on my cock. Let me see you cum, baby. Wanna feel you cum for me."
His words are accompanied by his hips moving faster, hitting the spot inside you, making the fire in you unravel. Your back arches off the bed, mouth opening in a whimper as you cum, body drowning in pleasure.
 Your walls tighten around Taehyung, making him let out a choked moan. With two, three more thrusts, Taehyung is cumming in the condom. He slumps on you, letting out puffs of air, catching his breath. When Taehyung taps both of your legs gently, you remember that they've been there this whole time, and, holy shit, your fucking knee was fucking sprained. Taehyung, apparently has the same realization, because his concerned wide eyes lock with yours and he slowly untangles your legs. Your knee gives a twinge in protest to movement but as soon as it's straight and on the bed, you feel fine. Taehyung pulls out, and ties the condom off, getting up to go and throw it in the bin.
 When he comes back, it's to you playing with your fingers running circles on your navel. You stop your actions when you realize he's back in the room, your cheeks flushing a little in embarrassment. Taehyung mumbles a 'cute' but doesn't say anything else.
Taehyung has a wet towel in one hand, with which he gently wipes between your legs. And when he's done, he leans down to leave a kiss on your forehead, and then he's gone again. Your eyes follow his bubble butt as he leaves the room.
 Exhaustion seeps into your bones, and your eyes close. They only open to the sound of something being set down on the bedside table. You open your eyes and turn your head to see that it's a glass of water, and Taehyung, Taehyung is wearing shorts again.
 You sit up, grabbing the glass and gulping down the water. The thought that you're still completely naked makes you feel shy, even after all of the things you just did. Taehyung sits
 beside you on the bed, taking the glass from your hand and putting it on the table.
 "Uhm.."
 "I ju-"
 Both of you shut up, but when you lock eyes with each other, laughter spills out of you. With a smile on his face, Taehyung speaks first.
 "What were you going to say?"
 You think for a moment, wondering if what you're about to say will sound weird or not.
 "Uh, just that, do you want to stay over?"
 With disbelief painting his face, Taehyung asks, "You want me to?"
 You try to keep the endearment out of your voice as you deadpan, "Oh no, the monster under my bed just liked your feet and told me to ask you to stay longer."
 It takes a moment for your words to register, but when Taehyung realizes what you just said, laughter tumbles from his lips.
  Your concerned friends knock on your door the next morning, and a clueless Taehyung opens the door to let them in. Your friends barge in to find you wrapped in a blanket, lying on the couch, Haikyuu! playing on your TV. Taehyung just stands there, neck full of hickies, rampant sex hair, smelling like your body wash.
 Your friends look at you for a moment, then turn to Taehyung only to turn back to you. When one of them asks you what the hell you've been doing yesterday and where you've been, you lock eyes with Taehyung as you smugly say,
 "What can I even say? It was one heck of a workout."
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songzhong · 3 years ago
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How does a God fall in love ?
Although he was given many titles which would put him in people’s mind above mortals, the man known as Rex Lapis was still a man. Before he was called such a name. Before he was called Morax. As he ascended the mountains of Liyue with his dearest friend at his side, he was called Zhongli. And certain plains were proof of that. And, above all else, he was a man.
Zhongli’s knowledge of mortals’ emotions is mostly learned. Analytical, as he has a hard time relating to them. This, however, doesn’t mean that he himself cannot live those emotions, although in the way of an adepti. This conflict, this aspect of him that is out-of-touch, is simply due to the gap between adepti and human perception... a bridge Zhongli is more than willing to cross, for he yearns to finally live for himself the life she wanted to protect, and kept singing of their beauty and fragile nature.
Ch―no, Ajax, was never seen, initially, for Zhongli, as more than Tartaglia Childe. Not that he didn’t know about the young harbinger―part of his good relationship with the Tsaritsa was the polite yet open communication between the two of them, and their mutual understanding of one another. Zhongli was quick to know about the young man who would be coming to Liyue, and the praise she’d speak of him.
A brash young adult, who smelled of the depths of Khaenri’ah he hadn’t felt since 500 years ago, hiding his weaknesses behind oozing charisma and cunning choice of words. A talented warrior and capable leader, easily misunderstood by how tightly compartmentalize the aspects of him were.
Zhongli was always one to be professional before anything else. And any show of friendliness Childe showed was taken as simply a quirk of his personality, as the man was quite expressive, never dared to be too serious in his conversations. This was only his attitude towards work, or so the archon thought. The truth was, despite having an acceptable diplomatic relationship with the Tsaritsa, the Northern Bank was abusing the people of Liyue with their loans, and the Tsaritsa wished to raise hell as Zhongli could only protect his home per their contract. The weight behind their affiliation, to the consultant, didn’t give any place for anything more than two men who understood one another’s position and obligations, even if they were to clash.
There was no place for anything personal.
Or so Zhongli thought. Never did Zhongli expect the year they had spent together to have meant so much more to Childe, as he expressed through his anger and frustration after the discovery that the consul was, in fact, the Geo archon. ... Childe didn’t only surprise him by his raw skills and versatility, despite being a handful, now he was surprising him with what looked like... genuine feelings ? It felt impossible for Zhongli. How could their silent agreement be more if... nothing had been said about it ? He was so confused, and his surprise kept being refreshed over and over again as he pondered upon it. If Childe truly thought they were friends, without the arm’s length distance of their profession... how could he handle such tension between the two of them and not fall apart ? Once more... this young man kept breaking his expectations apart, doing as he pleased... the Tsaritsa may have not said how much of a handful he would be.
The two of them continued to spend time together. Even Zhongli’s subsequent crushing of a whole rebel faction of the treasure hoarders didn’t phase him, much less the bloodbath of their fighting. Even as Childe showed something akin to despair and ecstasy, the archon only saw a child throwing a tantrum, irrational emotions which were only on the short term, as this rascal could never start to think about the long term of most matters, their consequences. It looked like that, whenever he could, he would do as he pleased. What got under Zhongli’s skin the most... is that he knew that this young man brimming with potential could do so much, had the absolute intelligence and abilities to do so much... and yet, his emotions would take over, and his impatience and brashness would mostly guide his decisions. Truly, the very definition of trouble. 
The archon’s opinion wouldn’t change, although by his learned knowledge on emotions, he wouldn’t be insensitive, and consider Childe’s feelings as being partly genuine―validate them, support him and do his best to bring out the best outcome. They did spend a significant amount of time together, and shared certain personal details on one another, atop of their mutual respect―such diplomatic friendship held their own weight in mora.
And Zhongli was willing to humor the thought of it. Have some bits of friendly rapports here and there, as men. Part of showing his dragon form to Childe was alongside this line of thought. To let the young man indulge, see where he would take it. And, constantly so, test if those feelings Childe claimed to have for him were real.
But have him be a true friend ? The way he did his old companions ? The traveler ? There was no place for anything personal.
... or so he thought.
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He didn’t expect a kiss at all. Because of what it meant. What it would mean for someone of Childe’s age, position and situation. Kissing was intimate, romantic, meaningful. And given the harbinger’s inexperience, Zhongli didn’t see him as one to play around with others in this aspect―on the contrary, it added even more to the surprise because the man looked more like the type to be looking for a sparring partner than a romantic one.
He was deciding between respecting Childe’s desires and reply in kind of his own or gently push him back and remind him of their positions, but before the consultant who normally could make a decision so easily in any situation could remotely pick, the younger was gone. And Zhongli was only left with a thousand questions, towards both this person and himself.
Thinking that Childe was leaving as the only explanation for such rash behavior was stupid. Blinded by his own confusion, and yet his mortal heart couldn’t find anything else, clouding his rational thoughts. If he was able to shed any tears, he might have upon learning that Childe was not leaving Liyue for good. The flood of relief had been like one he hadn’t felt since he had witnessed how Liyue could handle itself without him. But it was Zhongli we were talking about. He didn’t dare show the extent of his feelings, and would only process them on his own. During and after the confrontation.
And just like that, for days and days afterwards, there was only one person in his thoughts.
Maybe Childe didn’t mean any feelings towards him, but the evidence kept piling up against it. Before he knew it, the archon’s heart was trapped, feeling the emotions he hypothesized were in the harbinger, and no sight of him was remotely the same. It didn’t help how, since their bloodied duel after he had given away his gnosis, the two of them had grown noticeably closer. The lack of the usual distance between them was enough to have the consultant suddenly unsure of anything, constantly questioning what he or Childe was remotely feeling.
And the way he felt at the eventuality that this man’s loyalty fell onto a future of violence and death, atop of Liyue being the place he didn’t belong to never left him since that day. The words of 5th Harbinger still echoing in Zhongli’s mind at such a time :
“One can trust him, but one ought not get too attached. He has unusual tastes when it comes to combat ― the encounters he craves the most being those that bring him closest to his own demise.”
Those words kept stacking again and again on this rainy day where in the midst of adrenaline, he was so angered at him, and the way this young man kissed him like one would to someone they wanted to spend a significant amount of their lives with.
But those were only suppositions, why did he kept pondering on it ? How could this person smile and cherish so much yet be so careless about their own safety ? ... how could a single mortal be so full of love for so many things, so many people, and yet have such strength as to not be scared of their own mortality ? It didn’t make sense...
... why was this dread towards this type of selfless, yet individualistically driven by their own wants person so incredibly familiar ? The same ideal to take over the world and reshape it, with this incredible force of will fueling from the ones they cared for most ?
Zhongli’s fingers stopped fiddling with the puzzle in his hand, hovering above his hand as he still tried to open it, the dumbbell softly glowing from his geo manipulations, the scent of glaze lilies still subtly emanating from it after all these years, even as this particular kind had been gone for millennia.
... what would her wisdom tell him to do ? He knew the answer... and, somehow, for a man who didn’t hold any grudge, he hated it. Because, in the horizon, the same pain was to come. And yet, with it, the potential of the happiest he could ever be.
Would he ever have the chance to show this mortal what he would have done if he hadn’t walked away while he was too struck with doubt to follow the very mortal doctrines of the heart he had told himself to follow ?
And people said he was a wise man. When he couldn’t even express properly to someone he had fallen for them.
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zoefandom127 · 4 years ago
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this literally came up out of nowhere. I was thinking about this YJ fic i read a while ago when Artemis got poisoned then i started thinking about Mikasa's family line and how she has SUPER STRENGTH (don't try to argue with me, just let me believe what i want to believe lol) So i got to thinking and this is what came to be. This totally does not correlate with the plot and i think it may a little all over the place...but let's see how well i did!
The Durability of an Individual
She had never heard of another person with her last name. The last people she knew with the name Ackerman were her parents and her memory of them in her life was pretty short-lived.
Kenny the Ripper. Kenny Ackerman.
Captain Levi. Levi Ackerman.
Ackerman.
What a fucking family tree. She was related to an expert killer and a blunt, emotionless captain. Well, at least there's somewhat of a personality resemblance with Levi.
When Levi had finally brought Kenny into custody, she thought she'd get some answers. But the man was as silent as a dumbbell, refusing to say anything until his hearing. She'd been watching him be interrogated by Levi and Erwin and hoping for a little slip about her family.
Where are they from? Why were they persecuted? Where is everyone else? Anything would suffice her need to know. It had been a good ten minutes before her legs got tired and the fluorescent light started to burn her eyes. She made a beeline for the exit and was met with the afternoon breeze of Ehrmich.
"Hey." She turned to meet the voice and was met with the two boys who were always by her side.
"You okay?" Eren said with a worried expression at her dejected face. Of course, her face remained neutral but with a simple glance, he could always understand what she was feeling.
"Yeah, I just...I finally found my...I don't know what they are and—" Mikasa looked down at the floor she stood, suddenly finding the cracks in the stone pretty interesting. "I want to know more about myself. You know, where I come from, what I am, who my parents were." Her voice cracked at the end.
She felt an arm wrap around her waist and pull her body into the side of his. She heard Armin shuffle to her other side and place a comforting hand on her shoulder. Letting out a heavy sigh, Mikasa laid her head on Eren's shoulder.
She typically refused to think or talk about anything that involved her parents in fear of having the memory of that night replay in her mind. It still haunted her to this day though she wished it didn't. Not just her parent's death but the people she murdered. That was enough trauma to last a century.
Before she basked too long in the presence of her friends, a door opened only to reveal a stone-faced Levi.
"Ackerman." Mikasa quickly turned her head to salute her captain, feeling Armin and Eren do the same on either side of her. Levi waved them off and set his eyes on her. "You can try to get answers out of the bastard but I guarantee he won't budge. Good luck." Levi stepped aside to allow Mikasa to enter.
Hesitating, Mikasa strode through the door, hearing her friends shuffle in behind her. Making a left on the second door of the hallway she stood before the man who was her supposed "family". Her breath hitched when she saw him bloodied and bruised. Not that she had expected anything less, this has become the Scout's forte now.
Kenny lifted his head slowly, taking in the sight in front of him. He gave a wide, toothy smile and let out what seemed to be a laugh. "Really, kid? You gave up so you sent in the girl? I know I didn't raise a quitter."
Mikasa almost flinched when he yelled the last part. "I…" Mikasa pushed her shoulders back farther than they already were and made her face colder than it was before, "You're a part of the Ackerman clan. Tell me more about them."
"Heh. Not a lot I can tell you, kid. I don't know much more than you." Kenny spoke with a menacing tone, keeping his eyes firmly on her causing her to shuffle slightly on the balls of her feet.
"You don't know anything? What about where we're from? How we got scattered? What makes us able to do the things we do?" Mikasa almost sounded desperate. "Who we were? Just give me that much."
"Sorry. Beats me." Kenny smiled condescendingly and proceeded to look Mikasa up and down escalating her discomfort. "But...you do look familiar."
Mikasa's eyes narrowed at the outward thought. She'd never met him until now so what the hell could he possibly mean by that statement.
"Ah. I get it now. You're Linda and Jamun's daughter."
Mikasa tensed immediately. Her whole body stiffened and her eyes widened, the only indications that his words surprised her. "How did you—"
"You were the girls they were after. You know I dabbled in human trafficking myself, right Levi?" He nodded his head towards the expressionless man leaning against the wall next to the door. "A real doozy business. Quit after about 3 months. But for a short while, I became the commander. You know; calling all the shots, deciding who to kill and who to take."
Mikasa felt her fists clench and unclench repeatedly, trying to figure out where he was going with this whole spiel.
"I remember seeing the name 'Ackerman' on the list and thinking 'Huh, what a small world'. Honestly, I just wanted to test if these were true Ackerman's, you know? Strength and all. Of course my men, dumbasses I'll tell you, killed one too many. I asked the system the next morning why they gave me a group of incompetent shitheads and—"
"What are you saying?" Mikasa demanded, voice shaking.
Kenny seemed a little irritated at the interruption and looked at Mikasa through one not swollen eye like she asked the dumbest question ever. "My, my. You got one almost as dumb as you, Levi." Kenny smiled a menacing smile and gave Mikasa a look that sent chills down her spine. "I sent out the order to kill your parents."
Her feet went cold. Her heart started to beat hard against her ribcage that she thought it might bust out. There was a faint calling of her name from the hallway but she couldn't quite place the voice. She stood frozen in front of "The Ripper", his smile never wavering. Her nails dug into the palms of her hand as she tried to keep her composure but even she could feel her body trembling.
"Well, parent. Singular. Like I said those men were stupid as he—" Kenny didn't even get the full sentence out before a fist made contact with his face in record time and strength. A satisfying crunch filled the silence of the room. As soon as the first hit happened it didn't stop.
Punch after punch rained upon Kenny's body and with his hands tied firmly behind his back he was left defenseless. Usually, Mikasa was the calm one. She was always level headed and never one to fight unless it's needed. But something inside of her snapped. Either it was the careless way Kenny confessed to her parent's murder or the fact that this sick man was her relative; she had no idea. All she knew was that he was in front of her and he was punchable.
"Mikasa." She faintly heard Eren's voice caution her in the background but she didn't stop. The punches became faster and more forceful. She was blinded by rage, she didn't even notice Kenny loosening himself from his bindings.
She felt multiple hands attempt to pull her back but she shrugged them off with a strength none of them could attend to.
"Ackerman!" The commanding voice stopped her in motion, her fist suspended in mid-air. She turned her head to meet Commander Erwin's calm but serious eyes. "Leave."
Her fist throbbed as she slowly lowered her arm. The shaking in her body was less prevalent but still noticeable. Her face was etched in what seemed to be a dangerous scowl as she looked around the room.
She could feel everyone's gaze on her which only made her more uncomfortable. Armin gave her the same worried look he'd give Eren when he went off the rails. The concern that showed in Eren's face was almost alarming but she paid no attention to it.
Sparing one last glance at Kenny, Mikasa turned on her heels to leave the room. But before she could get too far, a strong hand grasped her wrist with an unyielding grip. The hand yanked her forcefully towards the body it was attached to and turned her so that her arm twisted painfully behind her back.
"Ah!" Mikasa let out a cry of pain as she wiggled to release herself but the hand only tightened more around her wrist.
It happened fast. Everyone stood straight in alert and turned their attention to Mikasa in a split second. Eren's eyes scanned the scene and narrowed in a frightening way.
"Now, now. Don't resist. It'll only hurt more. Right, Levi?" Kenny spoke, sadistically.
Mikasa struggled mercilessly against his grasp, almost releasing herself but Kenny simply reevaluated his grip and squeezed harder. Her strength wasn't going to get her out of this.
As for Levi, his eyes turned dark and colder than they already were. He was starting to get tired of Kenny addressing him as if he was still his caretaker. If you could even call him that.
Kenny was always one to have tricks up his sleeve. How had he not seen it sooner?
"Let her go," Eren growled, his eyes never leaving Mikasa.
"Aw, stop being so serious, kid. Learn how to smile." Kenny chuckled in Mikasa's ear. She nearly cringed at his breath.
Mikasa's wiggles became more violent but Kenny kept his hold firm. "She definitely has that Ackerman strength," Kenny muttered as he used one hand to try to keep Mikasa still and the other to reach into the back of his pants and pull out a syringe. The syringe was filled with a clear green liquid from top to bottom.
"Levi, you remember this? 'Only a true Ackerman with immeasurable strength can take this vial'," Kenny looked at the vial then shrugged. "Or whatever bullshit that bishop told me."
Kenny positioned the needle of the syringe inches before the skin of Mikasa's neck. Eren started to charge almost immediately at the older man but Levi pushed him and spoke first.
"What do you want?" Levi all but glowered at his Uncle. Huh. Never thought he'd be saying that.
Kenny's smile grew wider, showing his bloodied teeth. "Easy there, buddy. I just wanna see what the drug does. 'Course I'm not gonna test it out on myself. That would be dumb!" He moved the vial closer to Mikasa's neck. "Nah. Why not try it on someone I don't know."
"Wait!" Eren yelled. Kenny paused his movement. "Why does it have to be her? Can't you find someone else?"
"Sorry, but it has to be Ackerman blood that takes this thing, and unfortunately, no one else but me and my stupid nephew have it in this room. It's nothing personal. Just taking advantage of the opportunity I'm given...just like I taught you, Levi."
With that, Kenny plunged the syringe into Mikasa's neck. She jutted at the sudden insertion and scrunched her face in pain as she felt the liquid be injected into her body.
Loud noises of protest filled the room. Kenny had been ripped from behind her and shoved to the ground but the damage had already been done. He just laid there with a satisfied smile as guards began to point guns at his beaten body.
It was excruciating. The substance entered her and left a fiery, hot path as it passed through the blood in her body. Her knees buckled to the floor, suddenly feeling that her body was too heavy to hold up. The veins within her boiled beneath her skin and her senses became overwhelmed.
She suddenly became aware of every scent, every sound, and everything around her. Her heart thumped loudly in her ears. She didn't even notice how her bruised hands reached up to cover her ears and how a guttural scream ripped from her throat. Her eyes were scrunched shut in order to block out the dim light that illuminated the room, even with how dim it was it still blinded her. She heard her name get called repeatedly from the side of her as her back hunched over but it sounded so distant.
Her eyes flung wide open as she gasped for air that was all around but couldn't seem to be inhaled by her. Wavering on her knees, she slumped to the ground. Her eyes grew too heavy to keep open and the world spun around her.
Eren's face popped into her line of sight, the panic evident on his face. She could see his mouth moving but she didn't hear a thing. Suddenly too exhausted to keep up, Mikasa's eyes shut once again, finally succumbing to the darkness that enveloped her vision.
this was really fun to write! I'm not used to adding or rewriting plots and details like this tho so i'm not sure if it's good but i like it. hopefully you guys did too!
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bubmyg · 5 years ago
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trophy - myg
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pairing: yoongi x reader
genre/warnings: lawyer!au, established relationship, fluff, angst but it’s not really related to the couple, implications of misogyny/sexism, angry yoongi is a warning right?, ft intern jeongguk, also ft yoongi’s ass in dress pants
word count:  2,440
summary: in which you hold your own against yoongi’s clients or i won’t ask again. leave.
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Somewhere between shoving earrings through weeping, pierced skin, swiping the wrong color to your lips, and centering the chain of a necklace, a disconnected pair of hands worked at the cool zipper fitting to your spine with each ascending link, lips connected to those hands pressing to your shoulder while a soft voice told the cusp of your ear you’re beautiful. 
You shared the sentiment when you routinely looped a tie, classic black, around Yoongi’s neck, letting him knot it but taking the extra step to straighten it on his throat (a step you normally avoided in the mornings when the people he’d be interacting with were limited to Jeongguk and an elderly landlord with a difficult tenant in his apartment complex), lips landing on the heated apple of his cheek to profess, “Handsome.”
And when he turned in the bathroom mirror, your eyes traveled to the generous stretch of fabric on his ass, “Is this how you woo all your clients?”
He had to lift on his toes to peer closer in the mirror anyway, a teasing lift of his eyebrows at your reflection as delicate index fingers continued to fiddle with styled fringe, “I don’t know. You can ask them tonight, if you like.”
“I’d rather not find out that Janet from accounting that you helped with divorce papers last week thinks your ass is nice,” You leaned into the doorframe, easy smile laced on your lips. 
Yoongi mirrored your expression as he brushed past you in route to snatch his suit jacket where it was meticulously sprawled across the edge of the bed, making a point to pause, dramatically swing his arm backward, and get a handful of his own ass. 
“It’s all yours, anyway.”
And somewhere between realizing this party wasn’t filled with Janet’s from accounting but rather assholes from Yoongi’s various corporate partners, the jewelry swaying off your ears seemed to pick up a five pound dumbbell on each side, lipstick flaking it sizable chunks onto your tongue, and necklace drowning in the clamminess that sprung underneath the collar of your dress. 
The rectangle of cheese delicately clutched in your fingertips tasted sour next to the clump of toothpaste still clinging to your back molars and the visible wince on your features and the half eaten block of sharp cheddar made you long for pained dinner parties with business sharks who had Yoongi at their every beck and call if trouble ever were to arise within their companies where you could simply excuse yourself to your kitchen and feed Holly the disgusting hunk of fucking cheese. 
Your closest thing to Holly was a one Jeon Jeongguk, irises rounded like the cheap chandeliers barely emitting any light into the banquet room of some building placed just inches away from a golf course. You flaked away the parts your teeth had touched with a delicate fingernail, uncaring as you smashed the bits into the velvet, forest green carpet below the sole of your shoe as your path became purposeful for the lanky intern clutching a champagne glass in white knuckles.  
You nudged his arm once you reached him. “Alright?”
Jeongguk barely confirmed it was you and half considered the object you stretched out to him, stressed mind registering food! and snatching it to push between puffed cheeks, mumbling a fine and thanks all the same as he chewed. He swallowed, seeming to calm at the amused and comforting smile you offered when he glanced at you. “Sorry…” He tried this time, sheepish as the smallest sliver of his teeth appeared. You followed his gaze as it flitted away from you, slow in pivoting a short distance across the room to the small group of men gathered just beyond a table full of empty chairs. 
You noticed Yoongi first, the other faces vaguely familiar, but Yoongi’s easy stance, sat into his hip with one knee slightly bent, glass of water clutched in loose fingertips almost empty, wrist swirling the last of it at the bottom as he nodded along to the dialog of one of the other men, cracking an easy smile paired with something, a joke apparently, that earned an audible melody of chuckles. You couldn’t help but smile too, some sort of proud fond swelling your heart into your throat but you tended to Jeongguk first. 
“You can go over there, you know.”
Jeongguk peered at you like you’d grown a second nose on your forehead, covering the feigned shock with a cough and he shook his head, “No...it’s okay. Maybe later.”
“He’s proud of you, you know,” You patted the younger man’s arm, “I’m sure he’d love to brag on you. What’s that called? Networking? And with your reference in person!”
Jeongguk laughed, shoving his free hand deep in the pocket of his dress pants and one curly hair escaped from where he’d styled it over his ears, “Maybe...have you met them yet?”
“Not them specifically. I’ve met some people here.”
Another laugh, this one more tender and Jeongguk nudged you back this time, eyes soft under a lidded gaze, “You should go over there. He’s probably talking about you, anyway.”
Something burned at your skin, paired to your oversized heart still throbbing in your throat and you coughed when your chin dropped, shy at Jeongguk’s admission. You recovered with a shrug, scuffing your foot into the carpet floor and more cheese trailed in its wake. “Eh, probably not.”
Stupid cliche’ timing called your name in the form of Yoongi’s voice and you found three pairs of eyes resting on you, the one of home negating the scrutiny of the other two. Your joints seemed to lock you in place and it was only Jeongguk’s teasing told you so in your ear that had you shuffling a step forward at the beckon of Yoongi’s encouraging smile and outstretched hand. 
“Come with me,” You managed to corral at the last second and you twisted your fingers in the cuffed fabric at Jeongguk’s wrist to yank him the first few steps after you, releasing him with an easy smile directed only at your husband as you took his hand when you came close enough.
Yoongi pulled you against his side, dropping a kiss to your temple as he murmured, “How are you?” against your skin. You squeezed his hand in response, opposite hand stretching for the man closest to you, customer service smile happily in disguise. 
“Chang Jung,” The first informed, tight lipped and tight gripped. 
“Park Heechul,” The second lingered, eyes cast across your face as he gripped your hand in two palms for longer than necessary, “and you must be the wife Mr. Min speaks so highly of.”
You subconsciously shuffled closer to Yoongi’s side, the soft bump of your presence making him defer to the swaying figure beyond your shoulder, “And this is my intern, Jeon Jeongguk. Very talented, probably did the bulk of the paperwork you all have received in the past few months.”
Another few easy chuckles. Mr. Chang, the more soft spoken of the two elicited the quieting of the laughter by speaking between the two of you. 
“So, you two attended the same universities?”
Yoongi nodded, “Undergrad and beyond.”
“A great masters program in business goes in tandem with a university that has an excellent law school, I suppose,” You agreed and another discreet squeeze to your hand had your shoulders setting when you were addressed for the first time by Mr. Park. 
“We understand you work with...animals?” His gaze shifted to Yoongi who was already nodding. The snort that came from deep within his nasal cavity didn’t settle right with you as he continued, “...what exactly does that entail?”
“I don’t directly handle the animals. I make it so the great individuals at all the shelters in the area have the means and funds and paychecks to be able to handle animals,” The ease that came with talking about your passions helped you along, “I work in finance but my specialty is nonprofit. The vast majority of my clientele are the animal shelters in the region. I attract and manage funds for them. Essentially.”
“Ah,” You glared at the bob of the man’s throat as he took a disinterested gulp of his wine, “Charity.” 
“Animal shelter employees are paid?” Mr. Chang spoke, “I thought that was on a volunteer basis?”
“Some are, some aren’t. Each is different in what they receive as far as tax dollars, city funding, the like,” You frowned, “Running a successful animal shelter is a full time operation, sir.”
“I guess I need to check where my tax dollars are going,” Mr. Park laughed as if it were a joke and as if he had a choice or say in the matter. “And you, dear, I can almost assure would make more by simply becoming his secretary.”
Yoongi tensed next to you but you spoke before he could, bristling on the verge of your patience, “I help when he needs me to. Doesn’t require me being on the payroll.”
“Speaking of help, I hear you’re a fantastic cook,” Mr. Park considered the empty table beyond him, a nearby plate clean aside from a few crumbs decorating the lipped edges, “Was the pork your recipe?”
You shouldered the insinuation, knowing Yoongi certainly didn’t sell you as a housewife with a knack for a stack of untouched cookbooks displayed on some rack in the middle of an expensive kitchen island. 
“I’m not on the payroll but I’m informed enough to know we have enough of a budget to hire a caterer for that,” You nodded, smile on your lips a line of cordiality. 
“Feisty too,” Mr. Park’s eyebrows lifted as Mr. Chang began to chortle along with him, “We could use someone like you at my company, answering phone calls, filtering out the particularly difficult patrons…”
You didn’t realize you’d let go of Yoongi’s hand until you hit his elbow in route to cross your arms over your chest. 
“With absolutely no respect at all, Mr. Park—” You bristled into the widest smile you’d cracked the entire interaction, “—I believe I’m overqualified to work at any position at your company. Particularly yours.” A curt wave of the top hand folded over your chest and you quipped, “Have a good evening.” before fleeing off into the dim room. 
Yoongi barely glanced at Jeongguk, an unspoken request to go after you while he tended to the mess before him. The decision was easy, and he approached it with the powerful aura that encompassed his previously relaxed state, seeping into the way a veined appendage was pointed in placing his glass of water down on the table, fingers folding at his belt buckle as he sucked air in and out through his nose. 
“As my wife put it,” Yoongi started, smile not quite reaching his teeth like yours had but similar in meaning all the same, “With absolutely zero respect, sirs, I think it’s unspoken that our contract is terminated. I suggest you seek out another attorney to handle your affairs.”
“Mr. Min, there was no offense meant by—”
Yoongi held up a steady palm the other fishing for the chair Mr. Park had previously been seated in, easily sliding it until it touched the table cloth fluttering off the table. “I also suggest that you leave. Immediately.”
Another laugh, cocky at best, slipped into the two hands Mr. Park held up now. “Can’t we speak about this as men?” 
The smile met Yoongi’s teeth now, leaning a fraction closer to the older man. 
“I won’t ask again.”
Jeongguk was stationed in front of the bathroom door like a coondog who’d just treed a frightened animal except the roles were reversed. He was the frightened animal, eyes growing wider as Yoongi’s purposeful stride approached and when he pointed to the door, Yoongi broke into a jog, shrugging past his younger friend to shoulder his way through the swinging door. 
The singular stall door was closed, your earrings abandoned on the lip of the sink bowl, phone and purse on the tiny couch with unidentified stains dotting the blue velvet. 
“It’s me,” He breathed after a moment, knuckles gentle on the locked door. 
“Can’t come to the phone right now,” He would have smiled if he wouldn’t have heard the clear sniffle in your voice. “Try again later.”
So he paused, knocked after a dozen heartbeats, and then, “This is later. Hello? Is anyone home?”
The door opened to your red eyes and defeated stature, shoulders slumped as you tried to smile through the tracks of liquid still slipping down the slope of your cheeks. It barely twitched high enough to be considered a smirk until it broke again, directly preceding the step you took to get to Yoongi. 
“Did you kick their asses?”
Yoongi laughed, genuine as his palm cradled the back of your head against his rumbling chest, “No. But I wanted to.”
“You should have,” You clutched the lapels of his jacket as he walked your statures backward, falling gently to the tiny couch, “I would have bailed you out of jail.”
He shifted you in his embrace, hugging you against his side as you kicked your shoes off to curl completely into him. Lips found your forehead this time, “Violence is never the answer but...I would have enjoyed seeing you sock one of them in the face. Both, preferably, but one good punch would have sufficed me for at least a couple years.”
A tiny laugh emitted from your lips, but it sobered when your voice broke in a whisper, simple in your obvious feelings but it broke Yoongi’s heart all the same.
“I didn’t like that.”
“I’m always proud of you, you know that, right? I’m continuously awed and inspired by you,” Yoongi took your face in his hands, swiping at fresh tears that angrily curled into your skin to look directly into your eyes, “I love you.”
You sniffled unattractively and you were partially kidding but the largest part of you in that moment helped you inquire, “I’m not just your trophy wife, huh?”
His chaste kiss lingered on the softness of your lips, mumbling between the seam of your mouth, “Absolutely not. Don’t let two dumbasses belittle the high regard I hold you in but especially not your opinion of yourself.”
“You’re badass, angel,” Yoongi’s lips pressed against your cheek, rubbing your nose with his as he grinned, gums and all, “If anything, I’m the trophy husband.”
You buried yourself in his neck, smile hidden against his shoulder, “Flattering ourselves, are we?”
“...but frankly, your ass doesn’t disagree with that label—”
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shrinkingjaz · 4 years ago
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Today, I weigh 64.6kg which is the lightest I've been since I embarked on this weight loss journey at the start of 2018. I could spend days talking about how much my life has improved from every single angle I could think of, and there is a time and place for that (maybe in a future post) but I want to talk about health.
We are in a global health pandemic. Everywhere, people are joking about how their isolation diets will cause them to gain weight. I find it ironic because, surely, surely the time to focus on your health is the time when health has brought an entire civilisation down to its knees.
I've been thinking a lot about it. I have spent the last few months really, really getting everything in my life in order and focusing on my health and I can't count how many ways my health has improved. It's important to note that, at my highest weight, I was at a BMI of 34.3. My BMI is currently 22.7. I have lost 33.4kg and still have a way to go in order to reach my goal weight. But I want to highlight that I wasn't morbidly obese. I didn't have persistent health problems. But, when I really think about it, I could have easily been on the cusp of having very severe health problems. I was most definitely at risk. And while my blood tests were fine, I could run for 10 minutes without stopping and was generally "okay" from a health perspective, I now realise how close I wasn't.
. I used to nap. Every weekend, without fail, both days. I would sleep in all the time. Back in my Uni days, I was lethargic and would nap on all the days I didn't have classes. That has all changed. I exercise so much more, eat so much less, and have infinitely more energy. My sleep has also definitely improved. I'm out like a light every night and wake up refreshed.
. My feet used to hurt after walking long periods. I spent time in New York a few years ago and I spent the first day walking all over the place. For the next few days, my feet were in *agony*. The soles. The sides. The balls. The heels. I chalked it down to not being used to walking but my weight definitely had an impact. I now easily can walk 10-15km every day, for days in a row, and not feel anything at all.
. I would be out of breath walking up an incline, to the point where I would deliberately choose a different route if it meant I could avoid walking uphill or some stairs. I am no longer out of breath when I walk (or run!) up hills. I don't break my stride or go any slower than I would if I was walking or running on flat ground. I can hold a conversation while going up the incline.
. My resting heart rate has reduced. It used to be around 80-84 and now it's stays in the high 60s. I have always had low blood pressure, but my pulse rate has definitely reduced.
. I have a muscle strain/injury that flares up every now and then. It's behind my left lung/breast area and there was a point where I couldn't lift a 1kg dumbbell without it flaring up. Hell, I spent years putting my handbag on my right shoulder rather than the left, to avoid the pain, even though my left feels more natural. It would flare up if I tried running. Any physical exertion made it hurt. I remember once the pain was so bad that it hurt to breathe. I had it checked out and it didn't seem sinister but I was always weary of it. That pain? Gone. I haven't had it in years and forget it was once a thing.
. My nutrition has improved. I definitely eat very healthy and clean these days but it is important to note that you can lose weight by eating unhealthy foods. Calories in, calories out. This means that my skin is better, my teeth are better, my breath smells better, I get fewer hangnails, I don't have white spots on my nails anymore, I can tolerate pain better, my body temperature is better regulated, my hair is healthier, so many other things. So. Many. I'm not a health professional by any means. But I choose to believe a fair few of these relate to my improved nutrition.
. Tacking onto the last point, my tastebuds have changed. I don't want sugar. I don't want cream. I don't want butter. I don't want sauces. Hand me a chunk of raw carrot. Let me put some slices of zucchini in the oven with nothing on it and let the vegetable sing its taste. I crave healthy foods. A meal isn't a meal without vegetables. Deep fried food upsets my stomach. Excessive oil makes me feel nauseous. Food hangovers from eating bad food are real and awful.
. Above all, my mood, my positivity, my vitality, my overall outlook on life has changed. I can't articulate it in words. I am perpetually happy and optimistic. I have a spring in my step. I want to explore life for all it is. I can't talk about health without talking about mental health, and I genuinely can't tell you how happy I am. All the time.
The sum of all these points paints a sinister picture. I was in my early to mid 20s, easily on a steep descent into so many health problems. It's scary to think about. It's really scary to think about.
So.
What do I think about all those people who are choosing to ignore their health during a health pandemic? What do I think about all those people who say that body positivity is paramount now, that your increasing size doesn't matter, that the world is in a conspiracy against you and other overweight and obese people, that HAES is more important now than ever? What do I think about all those people who say that food is comfort and that it's okay to eat yourself happy, given how stressed everyone is?
Well.
I think about someone who isn't educated about calories. And thermodynamics. And maybe they have gained a few kilos over the pandemic. And maybe they are feeling stressed, anxious and worried. So, they go onto the internet. And they find posts about how your weight doesn't define you, how your health isn't determined by a scale, that all those facts about the linkages of weight to cancer, Covid-19 and many other sinister things like heart disease are rubbish, that they should embrace themselves and their body, and that it's society that is making them feel bad about their weight and how it's not their fault.
I think about that person. And my heart absolutely breaks.
Maybe that person could have been me in late 2017. Maybe I could have been reading those posts. Maybe I could have ended up morbidly obese instead of taking the path I have taken.
So, if nothing else. If even one person comes across this post and realises just how important it is to choose their health over everything else, then I feel like I will have done something good.
If the pandemic can teach us one thing, it's that health is so, so important.
We need to act like it. We have a responsibility to do so.
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purfectmlpblog · 5 years ago
Note
I forgot if you answered this already before, but what are all the ships you will be including in your updated next-gen?
Welp, this might be kind of a long list so I’ll just give you the basics of what I got down so far under a readmore lol maybe I’ll add more to this list or adjust a couple of these ships later, but this is just what I have for now :p
(Note: Most of this ain’t following canon to a T so try to keep that in mind; plus if I have a “???” next to a character it either means I haven’t picked a ship for them (yet) or their other partner is planned to be revealed later (whenever that might be ‘cause I’m lazy af lol) )
Mane 6:
Twilight/Tempest
Pinkie/Skystar
Applejack/Coloratura
Spike/Rarity (Note: Rarity doesn’t fall in love or get together with him until he’s a grown adult)
Rainbow/Dumbbell
Fluttershy/Big Mac
Royalty:
Shining/Cadence
Discord/Celestia
Thorax/Luna
Garble/Ember
Blueblood/Cheerilee
Flurry Heart/Pound Cake (engaged)
CMC/Student 6:
Applebloom/Diamond Tiara
Rumble/Sweetie Belle
Tender Taps/Twist
Sandbar/Yona
Ocellus/Smolder
Gallus/Silverstream
Family Members:
Braeburn/Marble Pie (Note: I don’t consider the Pie’s & Apple’s to be related in my headcanon)
Maud Pie/???
Limestone Pie/??? (broke up)
Zephyr Breeze/Treehugger (on-again/off-again)
Antagonists (Reformed or Not):
Sombra/Chrysalis
Starlight/Sunburst (they’d both be deceased later on)
Stygian/Moondancer
Lightning Dust/???
Ahuizotl/Daring Do (one night stand)
Silver Spoon/Cozy Glow
Flim (or) Flam/Suri Polomare
Dr.Caballeron/??? (broke up)
Svengallop/??? (one night stand)
Minor Characters:
Fancy Pants/Fleur De Lis
Cheese/Coco Pommel
Gilda/Fizzle (one night stand)
Soarin/Thunderlane
Spitfire/??? (one night stand)
Sassy Saddles/Sapphire Shores
Filthy Rich/Cherry Jubilee (they probably won’t have a kid but they’d still be married and thus DT gets a new step-mom ^^)
Double Diamond/Party Favor
Flash Sentry/Sugar Belle
Sky Stinger/Vapor Trail (broke up)
Troubleshoes/???
Background Characters:
Pokey Pierce/Roseluck
Lyra/Bon Bon
Hoops/Derpy
Cayenne/Sunshine Smiles
Octavia/Moonlight Raven
Vinyl Scratch/Songbird Serenade
EQG Cast:
Sunset/Aria Blaze
Sci!Twi/Flash Sentry
Fluttershy/Timber Spruce
Applejack/Adagio Dazzle
Rarity/Big Mac
Rainbow/Pinkie 
Sonata Dusk/Trixie
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mlpdestinyverse · 6 years ago
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“Fractured. Shattered.”
Upon his disownment, Skychaser discovers something so much more painful.
Feat. Skychaser,  Summer Rush
Story and Description Under The Cut
‘Haha...it hurts…Celestia, it fucking hurts…’ Skychaser pulled himself to the top of his home’s staircase, catching his breath through gritted teeth. As he limped forward he let out a soft hiss and was forced to stop in the middle of the dark hallway. His hoof grabbed onto what he was now sure had to be a dislocated arm. If not that, then his father had a crushing grip beyond his imagination. ‘As if it was my fault...as if I wanted this to happen…’ It was vivid in his mind; the mortified looks on his parent’s faces, as he was delivered to their doorstep by the local PD. He remembered how he had stupidly let his guard down as he turned to anxiously watch the officers leave, only for his oh-so-short-sighted weight-lifter of a father to furiously lunge for his foreleg and wrench him inside at full force. Not that it helped Skychaser that panic took over and he instinctively tried to jerk himself away, only for Dumbbell’s grip to tighten. And then came the unforgiving hostility. He knew his parents would have shouted at him if it hadn’t been so late at night. And it was all because he had been at the wrong place at the wrong time, and had been caught with the wrong ponies against his own will. But it clearly didn’t matter what his side of the story was. After all, their humiliation was all it took for Sky to no longer have a place in their home. “Wasting space”, his mother had said. It was strange. Skychaser didn’t even know how he was supposed to react. The initial shock had left him. When he had stared into the icy fury that had been his mother’s eyes, it was like everything had been building up to that very moment. He wondered if she had been waiting for an excuse all along just to get rid of him for good. He almost wanted to laugh. He couldn’t believe that she honestly wasn’t above doing that. ‘I have until morning to get out, huh...how generous of them to give me that much time.’ he bitterly joked within his mind. And yet, he was going to be free. He would never have to face the daily torment his own mother put him through, and would never have to sneak out, or argue, or tire himself out day after day with adults who simply saw him as a burden. But he had nowhere to go. And he would have nowhere to return to. And that thought, one that he had been suppressing until he was alone, terrified him. Feeling his shoulders shake, Skychaser held his injured arm closer. ‘That...and…’ Skychaser heard the creak of a door behind him and nearly leapt, whipping his head towards the source. And there, standing at her doorway, was his second reason to be afraid. “Sky…?” It only took a split second for him to watch Summer’s expression morph from confusion to concern. And another second later, panic exploded within his mind and Sky was scrambling towards his room, shutting and locking the door behind him. Skychaser breathed heavily, hearing his pulse beat in his ears. ’Why? Why does she have to be awake?!’ Despite his sister’s frantic knocks, and her gentle voice calling his name, Sky pressed his back against the door. His mind raced. He was supposed to quietly leave without goodbyes. He had planned to make this easier, on both of them. What was he supposed to do now? He pulled his legs closer to himself. He could feel the weaker part of him, the part of him that was choking from his fear and wanted to reach out to the one source of comfort that he once knew. His mind became a jumble of the things he so desperately wanted to explain to her, to relieve himself of this sickening dread. ’Stop. Stop you selfish idiot, stop trying to get her involved.’ What was he trying to gain from her this time? Her sympathy? Or did he expect her to march up to their parents and beg them not to kick him out? Selfish. Selfish. ‘She won’t believe me anyway. She thinks I’m some ‘misfit’. Mom’s drilled it into her head by now, I know it. She’ll just hate me too. Why do I keep doing this, why do I keep trying to involve her, why can’t I fucking decide for myself- W H Y?' His breathing quickened into shallow breaths, and he roughly slid a trembling hoof through his hair. Why were his walls breaking now? '...I want to see her.' Of course he knew why. ‘I want to talk to her.' He knew what he feared the most. ‘I don’t want to leave her.' And the more she desperately tried to reach out to him, the more he could feel himself cracking. “….I just want to know you’re okay..." 'Stop.' “...just let me help you." 'I’m beyond help, Summer. Just stop.' “I can do more than just Summer magic this time-" 'PLEASE!' He gripped his head, shutting his eyes tightly. His memories flowed through his mind, taunting him with the simpler days, full of music and teasing and warm naps in the early afternoons. Days that have escaped him, and would forever be out of his reach.
"Whatever I did to make you shut me out, I’m sorry. But I care about you. I’m sorry if I don’t make that clear enough…”
'Why do you still care?!' he wanted to scream, but the words were caught in his throat. Even now she wasted her time worrying about him. HE was making her worry about him. She was too kind. She would do so much better without someone as messed up as he was dragging her down. ….. ‘No. No more. She can’t know. It’s better if I’m gone before she finds out.' ...but he had to make sure of one thing. Because if there was anything he needed to know, anything that’d even bring him a fragment of peace, it was knowing he hadn’t left her alone all this time for nothing; and that he wouldn’t be abandoning her just to suffer like he did. “Are you happy?” …… “Are you happy here?” It was like the air hung heavy with his question, anticipation making him near sick to his stomach. For a moment his sister was silent. His muscles began to ache from the tension. And then… “...I am.” …… Her words were supposed to bring him peace. So why did it feel like his very chest was clenching from anguish? ‘I wanted her to say no...? Was I hoping she’d give me a reason to tell her the truth? Haha...I really am the worst.' Sky swallowed thickly, shakily gripping onto his injured arm for support. If everything he had ever endured with his parents had been mental torture, then knowing what he had to do now was torture of a different kind. He had to hurt her. It was the only way somepony like her would give up and walk away.
Forcing his gritted teeth to part, Skychaser took in a deep breath. And finally, he painfully croaked out his response, his words quivering with raw emotion as he forced them out. ”Then Leave. Me. Alone.” He braced himself. He trembled. And after a few agonizing heartbeats, a single word met his ears. It was soft, and broken, and it alone felt like a small knife to his chest. ”...fine.” Sky listened to her hoofsteps as she dragged herself away to her room. ’I had to do this,’ he insisted within his mind, fighting away the unrelenting guilt. He focused on how she would be better off without him. She’d never have to walk in on her family arguing, or see the parents she loved stressing out over him. Without the stress he brought, Summer would hopefully grow up with one less burden to fret over. She’d grow up without him, into an amazing and talented mare. She’d never have to see him again… ….. ‘I’m never going to see her again.’ Sky took in the deafening silence, and the emptiness of his moonlit room as dust flitted through the cold light. It was then that it truly set in how painfully alone he was. And he finally broke. “I’m sorry…” he whispered, a sob ripping from his throat. He struggled with shuddery breaths as he leaned his head back, tears blurring his vision. 'Forget about me... Please just forget about me.'
“And I’ve lost who I am And I can’t understand Why my heart is so broken Rejecting your…”
“Shattered” by Trading Yesterday.
When you’re treated like a burden, you can start to really believe you are one. Mental and emotional abuse completely rewires how you view yourself and the world around you.
"Shattered" is the companion piece to the previous part, "Fractured". Here we see Sky’s POV of the day he was kicked out, and we begin to see the effects of Lightning’s manipulation and verbal abuse on his mental state. “Selfish”. After constant exposure to the word, it’s one he came to associate himself with. Upon taking to the streets, Sky coped by fully closing off his heart from anyone and everything. Indifference and a cold, aggressive demeanor meant keeping himself safe, physically and emotionally. Luckily, after a few months of living on the streets, Skychaser was welcomed in by a special facility called the Cutie Mark Sanctuary. The highly-successful facility was founded by the Cutie Mark Crusaders and is a haven where children can learn, express themselves, or find a temporary home in case of homelessness. It was  certain orange pegasus of the Crusaders who found him and invited him to the sanctuary. In the end, Sky decided to go in for the latter-most reason, but originally had no intention of opening up or forming friendly relations or participating in any of the “silly” activities and classes the Sanctuary offered. Good thing that changed, and not only did he come to find his true calling, but he also found a loving family and a forever-home. 
PS: What happened with Sky that led to him being found by officers here was purposefully left vague. It’s a concept that still hasn’t solidified in my mind, so for now just assume he had an accidental run-in with some streetgoers that turned sour.
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aj-draws · 6 years ago
Text
Our Heartstrings
July 18th was the day Sly made the sacred post. I suppose you could consider this a one month anniversary for The Heart Squad! 
So this is a short story that explains how it feels like being on Tumblr, and how lucky I am to have such amazing friends. Because I like mixing fantasy and magic with my writing to make it more exciting, there’s a bit of a...twist that you’ll see :)
If you wanna scroll past this, feel free to, I don’t mind! This is personal writing of mine that I wanted to share, and if you’re curious about me (since this reflects me as a person as well), then you can go ahead and read this.
(Note! Some things I write about not might be necessarily true. The way I describe things might not be accurate, but behind the screen, that is what I see and interpret. It’s just my way of seeing things, my perspective, so uhh don’t get mad if I’m wrong lol??) 
(Another side note! This is completely related to the story involving The Heart Squad that we’re working on. Just wanted to make that clear)
Either way, have a lovely day, everyone! :D
@danyulsdimple @sly-is-my-name-loving-is-my-game @bubblseri @phlying-squirrel
(I’m gonna put a cut because this actually became really long? Whoops I still don’t regret a thing lmao-)
But first, an explanation. 
I...have this weird habit. I guess it stems from me being a detail oriented writer, but whenever I meet someone new and get to know them after an extended period of time, I have specific ways to describe that person. Similarly, this also happens for characters from new shows that I watch. For Sanders Sides, well, there’s that ‘Describing Sanders Sides Ships’ that I wrote. For Analogical, I think of an evening sunset, or for Logicality, the sun and the moon comes to mind-things like that.
Writing has always been very personal to me. Most of my art comes without thought, you see, there usually isn’t some secret message hidden in it. But whenever I write, it’s always to tell a story. Writing has posed a difficult and unpredictable, but rewarding challenge for me. I haven’t been able to write something so passionately for quite a long time, so thank you for that. <3
You all are awesome. Creating this little group has been so much fun, and having you guys be there means a lot to me. Sometimes it’s hard to express that, so I hope I can make that a little more clear with this little story. 
This is for my dear friends.
To Lea, whose openness and humor lets me smile and laugh with ease. 
To Piper, whose positive impact on others has caused me to admire her from afar.
To Sly, whose fascinating, patient personality provides comfort and stability. 
To Sienna, whose bright and kind nature has warmed my heart. 
This one is for you. I love you guys 💜💜💜
The red string of fate. 
It is said to be an unbreakable string of scarlet that binds soulmates. Just like how fate is more than what people make it out to be, so are the strings. 
I’d know. 
Because love comes in so many different forms, I’ve already had several strings when I was little. 
On my left hand was the comforting kind of love. The kind that gave me a small, soft smile when my mother kissed my head. Or when I couldn’t stop laughing over something my father joked about. Not just that, but even how proud I get when my sister compliments my art. Two strings tied to my parents wraps around my index finger, to lead me in the right direction. On the other hand, a string from my sister is looped around my thumb, which assured me that I could do anything. 
I’m glad the strings are weightless, because my right hand would feel as heavy as a dumbbell if they weren’t. My right hand symbolizes platonic love. A string instantly becomes attached the moment I interact with someone. It first starts around the wrist, and as you get to know the person, the string moves. The middle finger is where hatred for that person resides, the thumb for those that are simply acquaintances that cheer me on from afar, and the index finger is reserved for good-natured, honest best friends that bring out the best in me. 
My ring and pinkie fingers remain untouched. 
Now, the ring finger, I understand. If I were to feel affection toward a friend, perhaps a string might find a home around my ring finger. But my pinkie? What does such a tiny, trivial finger represent? 
Now back to the myth. As you can see, there is truth behind what is only known as a legend. 
But there is one thing that they got wrong.
Tapping the power button on my laptop, I lean back in my chair. I sigh, long and quiet, all the while tugging and massaging my fingers. Faint aching at my joints causes me slight discomfort, but it’s nothing unusual. After finishing seven drawings in a hour or two, what do you expect?
I rest both hands atop my keyboard and let all of my fingers stretch in front of me, admiring the strings. I smile, I really do...I can’t help but flinch when I feel my grin dissipate. 
The strings are a fading white, completely empty of color. 
All the rich, vibrant shades of red that they talked of was untrue. Seeing the strings makes my heart soar, but their colorless, bleak nature is bound to bring a bit of gloom from time to time. 
I constantly wonder why. Was I supposed to see color? Do I see colors when I reach a certain age? Am I broken? Why-
The screen comes alive, and the light that radiates from the letters on the keyboard bring me back to reality. Clicking on the blue logo that I know all too well, I find myself smiling right away. 
Online friends are an interesting case. Since I’ve never physically met them, they don’t have strings. I can leave asks on as many people’s blogs as I want, but not a single string appears. 
...There were four exceptions. Let me tell you about them. 
-
She is the countryside. 
She is the short walk to a nearby town, where the buildings huddle together and lights reflects off each other’s windows. There are quiet voices, the occasional booming cackle and the clinking of glasses. The streets and roads are mostly empty, but it is inside the stores and shops where laughter and chatter belong. 
There is a homely feeling to this small town. You could always find her wandering around, going from building to building leaving smiles and bright faces. Whether it’s complimenting others or joining a protection squad, she is there with the town, reveling in the closeness of their companionship.
And then you are home. You are where the houses become scattered and the concrete roads become gravel or sand. Gazing out over the horizon, there is only the gentle swaying of tall crops and a setting sun. 
You remain outside, sitting down and watching the sun fade away. Light falls and darkness rises, covering you with a blanket of constellations and glittering stars. With no factories or skyscrapers close by, the sky can breathe. 
When your back drops against the ground and the grass meets your hair, she grins beside you. She laughs along when you point out the constellations, remarking that they look like things they definitely aren’t supposed to look life. She is the lift of your lips, the sparkle in your eyes.
Lying down with the smell of fresh grass and cool air lingering upon my nose, I feel calm. Her presence, though it is not entirely familiar, is peaceful.  
But she is not always peaceful. In a place where there are nothing but fields and flatlands, you are bound to find something to liven things up. 
When the colorful leaves drop from trees and a chilling breeze settles in, you could be chatting with friends in that bustling coffee shop in town, or be in a library, immersing yourself in an interesting book. Even indoors, you are sitting by the fireplace or watching movies. You could be smelling the blooming flowers and morning dew, visiting gardens and climbing trees. Then all of a sudden, you’re dancing, barefoot, with the stars hanging over your head, a popping firecracker in your hand as you take in the warmth of July.
Whatever it is, it is new and exciting. Taking something so simple and making it worthwhile is an admirable feat. 
You do not know this place well, that is for sure. But you wish you do. You wish you could. The countryside is filled with wonders that you hope to explore and learn about in the future.
As you sit upright, you glance down. That faint swish on your wrist was indeed not the grass, but a string. 
All you can do is hope she feels the same. 
We are connected, the countryside and I. 
-
She is a city. 
Sometimes she feels distant, just like how New York City is to me, but I don’t mind. She isn’t constantly a part of my life, and yet every time I drive down that bridge, look into the river and see those shining buildings, I’m filled with excitement. 
The city is an acquired taste, something that you maybe wouldn’t enjoy unless you’ve visited it on multiple occasions. Even for me, a person who was born and raised in such a place for most of her life, the city takes some getting used to. 
In some parts, the buildings glitter like gold. With its polished glass windows, allowing sunlight to grace its surface all too perfectly, and elegant architecture, you are almost fooled by its facade. 
Then you could turn your head and see tired, drooping eyes, voices yelling into phones and people crossing streets with a red traffic light hanging over their heads. 
Insecurity disguises itself within beauty. 
And she is always there. 
The sun begins to set, bringing upon the shadows, the people and the lights. I’m stuck within a crowd of people, and I’m still alone.
After not being in the city for several months, things don’t seem all that beautiful anymore. 
Suddenly the echoing footsteps of the people around me doesn’t sound so soothing. The buses roar, lions that snarl and growl intensely. Cars screech to abrupt stops, paying no attention to the rapid honking or the blinking stoplights. Above me, the trains let out bellowing cries as they bang against the rickety steel tracks.
She is there, pulling me to safety. Away from the dreadful noises, from the crowd, until there is tranquil silence. In order to ease the tension, she cracks a small joke.
Now, just for a moment, I can laugh in peace.
There is a tug at the corner of her lips as she sets off into the city. I follow alongside her. For a little while, things don’t feel overwhelming anymore. There are no due dates, no drawing requests to get done, no stories that are begging to be written. I can see the city for what it truly is.
Just like her, the city is real. Its raw, imperfect magnificence is bound to stun anyone, as long as they take the time to get to know its delighting qualities. 
She is the embodiment of stupid, but brilliantly amusing conversations in the middle of the night. She speaks in the language of references, using words in a way that will make you giggle. Her words come quickly, in a rush that ends as soon as it appeared, but that refreshing feeling of a car speeding past you will never stop being exhilarating. 
She tends to change a lot. One moment she’ll be bubblegum pink, a rose dripping in paint. Then the warm tones of golden sunflowers, or even a cat stalking through the night. All the colors and scents shift from one theme to another-her love for aesthetics never ceases to impress me. 
She moves quickly and easily, but she will never completely abandon you. If she disappears for a couple of minutes, you can rest assured that she’ll come running back bearing a smile and a funny story. As fast as a subway train, she will jump from one topic to another, whether it’s about crazy school stories or cantaloupes. 
Her relatable humor will lift a chuckle from one’s throat, lightening up someone’s mood like how the lamp posts along the sidewalks come alive at night. Light pours in through the windows of buildings, illuminating the jet black sky. In the same way, she, with her exciting personality, is able to brighten one’s day. 
Only when you’re sitting on the roof of a building will you be able to appreciate her. When you sit still, taking in the view, just listen. She will be there. Not everyone enjoys the city the first time around, but I promise you, there’s always something there that’ll make you smile. 
She doesn’t even live in a city, so for all I know, she could have no idea what I’m talking about.
But as a person who has lived in one and loved it with all her heart-that’s saying a lot. 
She smiles softly, saying goodbye before turning her head to the city. She stares, almost in a daze, at the skyscrapers and flashing lights. She rises, jumping off the ledge, hitting a metal staircase attached to the side of the building. Rushing down the steps, she doesn’t look back once.
You aren’t worried. She will return, one way or another.
The wind picks up, a light breeze that mirrored her swift movements. I stand up and tuck a strand of hair behind my ear, noticing the tingling sensation that momentarily crossed my wrist. I look down and grin. 
We are connected, the city and I. 
-
They are a forest.
Personally, I haven’t spent much time in forests, so I think of them are rare. Unique. Where I live, there’s always been random patches of trees here and there, but never forests. 
I think forests have plenty of hidden beauty. There’s just something captivating about entering a forest in the midday, seeing the light filtering in through the trees. Every tree’s branches spreads out far and wide, their long arms stretching out to embrace the glorious, radiant sun, but also weaving together to create a blanket of protection over the forest floor. 
Forests means freedom. You could run, run, run: fast, far and even a little careless, but the support of the forest is always apparent. As you dash through the woods, you notice everything you could ever love about being able to express yourself. There’s the scent of pine cones and dirt, the gust of air that blows your hair into a tornado, and the babbling brook that you easily soar across.
But when the night fell-everything all of a sudden became more terrifying. 
It isn’t the forest itself that frightens you-it’s what surrounds it. There are howls of stalking predators, jaws snapping wildly. Voices come from the swaying trees and whistling wind, rapidly increasing whispers that made your legs tremble. Their vile words yank and snatch at the remnants of my sanity, draining all of the energy and hope out of me. The sounds are not there to hurt you necessarily, but sickening feeling persistently tugging at your stomach isn’t the most comforting thing either. 
They tell you that you’re not supposed to be there. Maybe you don’t deserve to discover any of the forest’s intriguing mysteries, or experience the gorgeous lights of a city, or even the simple excitement of the countryside. What if you’re being bothersome, or overbearing? What if-
The forest does not like ‘what ifs’. The forest does not mean to scare you, or make you feel out of place. 
The wind begins to ease up, the steady breeze soothing your shaking hands. As you look down, you close your eyes and listen once more. To the faint chirping of the cicadas, the rustling leaves and swishing branches. 
They appear at your side in your moments of unexpected, excessive doubt and panic. When your eyelids flutter open and you see them beside you, you are grounded. Safe. You start to talk to them, their tone hushed and quiet, as if they’re afraid of scaring you. You could never be scared of them. Perhaps worried that these conversations might be too time consuming for them, yes, but never scared. 
They show you the forest as it is: fascinating, patient, understanding and even showing a bit of fear from time to time. The forest is as welcoming as it is calming, and you enjoy that.
You never expected that you would ever experience happiness from a night as horrible as that one, but you did. The thoughts never destroyed you because the forest was there to protect you. 
Within the pitch black, there was light. Fireflies danced throughout the forest, their luminosity making me smile that night. 
When your eyelids felt heavy and your yawns grew longer, they told you to sleep. It was late, they spoke, and you need rest. You reluctantly gave in to this request.
Just before you were pulled into a deep slumber, something brushes against your wrist. The ghost of a smile graces your lips as you lose consciousness.
We are connected, the forest and I.
-
She is a meadow. 
I wish with all my heart that I could travel more often. I’ve only seen meadows through videos and pictures, but as an introvert that appreciates nature, I’d love to see one someday. 
All I can imagine is light and beauty. The ground dips into smooth, elegant valleys and rises in the form of rolling hills. The sky mirrors the sun’s movements, changing its colors as it dances across the heavens. If you only you were there to see it-the dazzling, radiant meadow at work, stunning you with its abundance of warmth.
After wandering around momentarily, you shiver, turning around and stiffening. The wispy, cotton-like clouds that were just drifting through the sky had transformed into something worse. You tremble in sync with the ground beneath your feet, feeling your breathing become choppy and unsteady. The loud, booming, angry noises sink into your mind, not giving you a chance to recover. All you can hear is the regret, all you can feel is the doubt and all you can see is the fear. 
You see her. Never once had she not been there for me. 
Hearing her footsteps, the noises disappear. The grey clouds linger for a second, before giving in to the blue skies and sunshine. The storm does not come for the meadow, whose genuine joy is something that cannot be easily purged. 
She comes with words-happy, lovely words woven together in the dandelions that surrounded her. She sits down, a smile on her face as she invites you to pick the flowers with her. The flowers�� colors are grounding and gentle to the touch. 
For every flower that you take, her kind words flood your eyes. One tells you that you are amazing, the second that you are talented, and another that you deserve all the happiness in the world. Each one carries laughter, brings excitement and makes you grin. One after another, as the dandelions fill your lap, her compassion fills your heart. 
There is one more dandelion. Once your fingers brush against its petals, you can hear it right away.
It reminds you that you are loved. 
Pressing that one to your chest, you can feel your smile grow, which was almost impossible considering how wide it was beforehand. You like that specific flower a lot, you admit. Sometimes you forget.
Her arm rests along your shoulders, her smile comforting you. She knows, and that is precisely why she says it.
The meadow, in all of its glory, embraces you. She whispers, telling you how sorry she is, and how much you are loved. You can smell it in the dandelions, and you can feel it in your heart. You do not deserve her. 
Are you okay, she asks with worry still lacing her voice. Upon spotting a string twirling around your wrist, you giggle and let yourself breathe. Without a doubt, you are alright, you answer.
We are connected, the meadow and I.
-
You might be asking, what about me? If one’s the countryside, the second’s a city, another is a forest, and the other is a meadow, then what am I?
The thing is: I had no idea.
I never saw myself as anything extravagant, or special. I don’t have the brightness of a city, the homely feel of the countryside, the soothing nature of a forest, or even the warmth of a meadow. What do I have? 
A tug on my wrist. Faint, but urgent. I glance up at the screen. 
I am...wanted...? Hm. I wonder. 
I’m walking, blind. My eyes are closed and I cannot will them open. But the four are by my side, so I know all is fine. 
The darkness clears, bringing in light. 
Dunes of soft sand spreads out in a blanket of golden as far as I can see. The sunlight casts its rays over the shoreline, causing glittering, hidden shells to reveal themselves. I stare in utter awe at the waves-at how, with every passing second, the colors seem to change. First, it’s turquoise, then azure, and suddenly cerulean. The shades of blue shift and churn peacefully, emitting the scent of salt. 
A beach. 
Maybe...Maybe I do belong. I don’t doubt it as much anymore. 
I stretch my hand out to the sea. I long for it, after all. Then, instead of focusing on the ocean, my gaze travels to my wrist. 
Four strings lift from their place and begin to move, following the movements of the gentle breeze. Once unfurled from my wrist, they leap-
And find a comfortable spot around my pinkie. 
Each string is filled with a color. 
Green for the city.
Pink with flecks of gold for the countryside. 
Red for the forest.
Yellow for the meadow. 
Purple for the beach.
Once upon a time, five colors met. They have never been the same since. 
They made a promise. It wasn’t too real or serious, just a dream that they hope with all their might would come true. They wish to one day meet each other. 
When this dream was made apparent that all five of them shared, purple smiled. Purple’s heart sung with joy, for she was once again reminded that she belonged. She sits, in front of her screen, closing her eyes and extending her pinkie. Purple wishes to meet the four vibrant, wonderful colors. 
One day, purple hopes. For now, she will remain at her screen: pencil to paper, fingers to keyboard. She is content with sharing herself this way, but...perhaps, with time...she will not be afraid of posting that picture. 
They all have their differences, yet they are still friends. 
They are The Heart Squad. ❤️💚💖💛💜
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