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studentbyday · 3 months ago

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how to survive a full course load in uni as a highly-sensitive person

wanted to try this kind of "advice" post / letter to past me as a premed student who also happens to be an HSP that sometimes struggles to regulate her emotions and is frequently overwhelmed by little things... this is a combo of things i'm glad i did in uni and what hindsight tells me i should've done... i hope that if any of this sounds relevant to you, whether you feel like you're an HSP or not, that you're able to take something useful away from it. and please feel free to reblog with your own tips/advice if you feel i missed something here! i'm just a sample size of 1.

part 1:

If you felt overwhelmed by your course load in high school, for the love of God, don't take the maximum (or “recommended”, which is the maximum at my uni) course load in your first year just to “graduate on time.” Take enough courses each semester that you feel the tingles of a challenge, but don't go overboard. You must feel the “tingles” so that you will be forced to find ways to adapt (i, at least, find it very diffcult to make myself get out of my comfort zone unless given no other option), but don't go to the extreme of taking on too much that you're silent screaming in panic more than you're getting things done. If you're not sure how many courses to enroll in, enroll in as many as you want, and if you find it too much, you can drop as many as you need to by the appropriate deadlines. Also, you may feel resistance to “lowering your standards” as you switch up your study methods to account for the much greater amount of material you need to cover, especially if you're an HSP who struggles with perfectionism, but just stick with it for a little while. You're so much more than a number or letter or percentage mark on an assignment or test, and you may find you're still able to consistently achieve all that you had wanted to in the academic realm. Perhaps you'll even find you're able to complete your work with greater calm and ease if you stick with it long enough. i say this as an hsp who still gets stressed by school but now has enough confidence to more easily calm myself down because i know i can still make it with imperfect study methods and because of that, i can do things with greater ease and apparently get on the dean's list not once but freakin’ twice during my degree?!?!?! i just got the email this week! and whaaaaaaa

If you followed tip #1, try slowly increasing the number of courses you take per semester. You're capable of more than you think. Life will throw you so many more curveballs and responsibilities as you get on, and the overwhelm may be demoralizing but you were meant to live. So, the earlier you train yourself to stop freaking out about each addition to your plate*, the easier it will be and the more confident in yourself you'll feel. In first year, I was overwhelmed with 3 courses per semester, and so in second year, I dropped to 2 and found it to be too little. In third year, I did 3 per semester and found it to be just right. Now, I'm doing 4 per semester and it's like first year all over again except I'm handling a fuller plate. And experimenting with taking 4 courses per semester and finding it's not the death sentence I thought it would be is giving me the confidence I need to take 5 courses per semester next year, my final year. ☺️ Ideally, I would've stuck with 3 in my second year and started on 4 in my third year, so I could even graduate sooner, but still, that's growth right there! And if some rando on the internet can do it, you can too! (* okay, you might not stop freaking out but you will be able to calm yourself down faster the more you practice, which is such a big ace for anyone, hsp or not!)

Please don't feel pressured to do all the social things immediately like joining all the clubs and societies and and high-energy social gatherings/parties. Please also don't feel guilty or blame yourself for not engaging in any or all of these, especially if you feel like you aren't living the “uni life” you want. You'll be here for what, 2, 3, or more years? That's a ton of time! Gradually add the extracurriculars as you feel ready (as in your academic life doesn't feel like a game of hot potato) and only as you feel so called to it that you're sure you're gonna regret it someday if you don't take the chance.

On a related note, don't feel like you have to do everything all at once. Some people take the maximum course load and somehow excel in a bunch of extracurricular activities at the same time while functioning on 5-7 hours of sleep. If that's not you, don't sweat it. Maybe you can adjust your schedule so that in one semester you focus more on academics and in the next, you focus more on the extracurriculars you need to feed your soul and boost your resumé.

SELF-CARE IS SO MUCH MORE IMPORTANT THAN (some) PEOPLE GIVE IT CREDIT FOR — DON'T YOU DARE DROP SELF-CARE IN FAVOR OF “PRODUCTIVITY.” (tbh i still struggle with this, BUT!) Ignore all the people who brag about how little sleep they got the night before the exam. Ignore all the people who brag about not having time to take care of their health in favor of completing another assignment or participating in some coveted extracurricular. Make an exercise plan for the kind of workout that rejuvenates you and follow through on it (except when too ill and tired...you'll know when you need to take a rest day, so listen to your body), whether it's yoga, dance, HIIT, slow pilates, weights, or whatever! And sleep a tonnnn. Sleep earlier than you feel you "should" (given that uni students seem to love to keep odd hours...and that habit may rub off on you as it did on me). Give yourself at least an hour to wind down from all the stimulants of the day (tbh sometimes i need 2 or more hours to finally feel relaxed enough after a long day)... don't subject yourself to the stimulant of your phone (if you happen to see this during your wind-down time, take this as your signal to GET THE FRICK OFF THE PHONE 😂). Take naps or just lie down and relax in bed as needed, especially if you feel you're fighting the flu or covid or whatnot. Take the time to have a nice, hot (or cold, depending on your personal preference 😅) shower or a simple, relaxing bath. Meditate when you need some quiet time, maybe try it in the dark if you feel you just really need to soothe your senses. Journal. Every. Day. At least for me, even if I feel my thoughts are mundane, somehow it helps keep me sane, especially when I have no one to talk to because everyone else around me is busy... (If even for one week I neglect basic self-care, I feel physically terrible which makes me feel mentally terrible and then I'm of no use to myself or anyone else! It isn't selfish or narcissistic and it definitely doesn't have to be expensive. Self-care really works wonders for stress levels and sustainable functioning, sometimes in really subtle ways.)

part 2: (did not know about tumblr's character limit for a single block. that's the only reason this second part exists otherwise it would all be in the same list lol)

When on the verge of panic-crying in defeat but you still need to push through or miss important deadlines, try studying to calming music/ambiences that are still stimulating enough to occupy the frazzled part of your brain that keeps you from functioning 😅 I suppose it's like a lullaby except for studying... 😅 One that worked for me last night was this one and a favorite since my high school days was this one. (What Elaine Aron said about water being really calming seems to be true for some reason and I have no idea why it works so well but it does so I'm rollin’ with it.)

Find small, low-effort creative outlets to release the restless energy that comes from creative needs neglected. Especially useful if you feel stuck in “left-brain” activities for most of the day and don't have much energy for your preferred creative outlets that ask more of you (also yes ik the whole left brain/right brain thing is a myth but idk how to concisely describe the bodily feeling bc it does feels like different parts of my brain are used for logical vs creative activities lol). I like to make wallpapers on Canva using the too many pics I download from the internet (istg I've probably changed my wallpaper at least once for every week since the start of term lol) and I guess I also make ugly comics when the mood strikes 😂

Take frequent, extended breaks from social media. This probably doesn't apply to only HSPs but I find that on the days I scroll a lot, create content for, or consume a lot of social media content in addition to all the things that go on in my real world, I get extra frazzled and tired. I think because of the depth of processing that comes with being HSP, we need to be extra mindful of where we put our energy and attention. Some of the mental health benefits I wasn't sure were true for me before I did a social media detox: at least for me, the peace and clarity of mind I get from it is unmatched! Imagine a world with less FOMO/toxic comparison, less guilt resulting from that, less of feeling like you're just very unaesthetic and dull irl, less guilt resulting from that, less time wasted, less guilt resulting from that. Less extraneous emotional clouding -> better judgment. Such a weight off just by hitting “sign out.”

Clean your workspace either before you study or after you study to have a clear mind. (Yeah, that's another a cliché but we HSPs tend to be more affected by our physical environments and we just gotta accept that and so keeping clean and, for me at least, minimalist, does wonders for my peace of mind 😊)

Don't be afraid to ask for help. You might feel like since you're a legal adult, you should be able to do everything by yourself all the time and not have to bother anyone. But the wise who have been legal adults for ages know that they can't do it all alone. So: do you need an extension on an assignment? Do you need help balancing your chores and schoolwork? Ask for help when you need it! It is not a sign of failure.

If you can, it might help to find yourself an inanimate study buddy 🧸 if you feel you need extra cozy/calming chemicals in your brain while you study 😅

Last but not least, if you have trouble regulating your emotions and fall into the pessimistic trap like I do sometimes, this may help:

If you would like a wallpaper version, here are two for different phone sizes lol:

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