#this is one of those nights that I am 100% certain I'm alone in the building and the (admittedly shitty) cameras confirm that

[localwhiskeyuncle]

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[moodriingz]

The Prophecy | J. Hughes

Summary | You’ve given up on love until love hits you in the face (with a door) 

Warnings | Unedited, one curse word, (really bad) angst

Author's Note | I finally finished all of my finals! So that means more regular stories so send in requests! This is also part of my 100 follower celebration!

Masterlist

You never expected to feel so lost in a city you lived in for most of your adult life. You and your college boyfriend broke up after five years of dating. You met early in your freshman year and were stuck together like glue. He made you feel like you caught lightning in a bottle, so much so you were willing to do anything for him. So many of your friends thought you were going to get married and he had been hinting at it since you graduated a year ago.

You were blindsided when he said that he didn’t think you two should be together anymore and basically kicked you out of your shared apartment. Luckily Hannah, your best friend, offered to stay in her apartment until you could find one. 

All you could think was that it was your fault. Why else would he end it so suddenly? He gave you little to no explanation. Even though you were still so young you felt like you would never find a love like his. It was like someone was betting against you. All you ever wanted was someone who wanted your company.

After a couple of weeks you were able to find a new apartment in a different part of town and you never felt so excited or rejuvenated. Hannah was trying to convince you to start dating again, but you told her it was too soon. You were scared someone was betting against your love life and you didn’t want to risk it yet. 

Little did you know when you went to check out a new pizza place you would run into the cutest guy you’ve ever seen. It wasn’t a normal meeting though he almost gave you a concussion by hitting you with the door.

“I’m so sorry, are you ok? How many fingers am I holding up?” The stranger asks as he stares into your eyes looking for any signs of injury. Before you respond you notice his really tall friend recovering the pizza off the ground.

“I’m fine thank- why are you moving your finger in front of my eyes?” You ask confused about what he is doing.

“I’m trying to make sure you don’t have a concussion. You hit your head pretty hard when you fell,” he said, still doing some concussion protocol? You’re not too certain what is happening honestly.

“I think I’m ok I really appreciate it though,” you say finally getting the opportunity to stand up as he backs up. You go to move inside before he stops you.

“Wait what’s your name?”

“Y/n,” You tell him before turning around to enter the shop and order your much deserved pizza.

Later you meet up with Hannah to debrief about both of your weeks. You almost forgot to tell her about the mystery pizza man until she mentions dating to you again.

“Hannah, I'm not going on a date right now. But there was this really cute guy who almost gave me a concussion the other night when I went to get pizza,” You say nonchalantly.

“What? Y/n why didn’t you tell me? What’s his name? Are you going out with him?” She babbles as you roll your eyes.

“No to all of those questions. I felt like such a fool because of my ex and I’m not doing that again.” You say with a shrug. Living alone has really forced you to think about your relationship and you realized that the end of your relationship was most likely your fault, and you definitely do not want to get into another relationship until you figure out how to stop it from happening again.

After dinner you and Hannah decide to hit a club that was only semi full until the hockey crowd filtered in after the game. Everyone seemed to be in good spirits though so the Devils must have won.

Little did you know is that your pizza mystery man was currently walking in the club with some of his teammates to celebrate. Hannah was a pretty big fan and spotted some of them almost instantly.

“Oh my gosh the Devils are here we should go say hey. Maybe you can find a date,” She wasn’t going to take no for an answer so you just let her pull you by the wrist.

Hannah finally stops when she’s face to face with Nico, who you only recognize because of all of his ads around town. Before you can introduce yourself someone calls out your name.

“Y/n,” Your mystery man. He says it shocked like he didn’t expect to see you again.

“You know Jack Hughes?” Hannah whispers into your ear. You just ignore her because maybe it's fate? Maybe it’s a cruel joke?

You don’t even know what to say, you’re so shocked by the turn of events. You never would’ve thought you’d meet him again. You thought your near concussion experience would be the last you see of him.

“I’m Jack by the way,” He says and you’re drawn in by his voice and his eyes that haven’t left yours.

“I think you owe me a drink for almost killing me,” You say, shocking yourself.

“In my defense I didn’t try to give you a concussion, my brother was distracting me,” He says leading you to the bar. You order your regular drink and he does the same before asking you if you’d want to talk for a bit.  

The two of you talked for what seemed like minutes until Hannah came to find you to let you know that she’s leaving. You check the time and realize you should probably leave as well. 

“I had an amazing night thanks for keeping me company,” You say getting up to leave.

“Wait let me give you my number,” Jack says standing up and you nod, handing him your phone.

You walk Hannah home because you’re much more sober than she is and all she can talk about is that you know Jack Hughes.

“You should go out with him, he's so cute and sweet.”

“Hannah I’m not dating right now and you know that,” You say, leading her to her door.

“Yeah I know but you just deserve to be happy, and I really think he would be perfect for you,” She said, drawing out her syllables. You say goodnight and make your way home which luckily isn’t too far from her apartment.

The next day you decide to listen to Hannah and reach out to Jack. You try texting him telling him that you had a great time talking to him last night, but the message never gets delivered. All you can do is feel idiotic. It wasn’t fate to run into him twice (physically or not). You feel so childish thinking maybe this was your chance. 

You blame Hannah for getting your hopes up to think that maybe something could happen. You were starting to think that maybe it was some cruel joke fate was playing on you. You were almost compelled to pray to change your prophecy, but then you just started feeling even more insane. But, there must be a way to change it, right?

Later in the week you decide to work out of a cafe nearby and feel like the universe is playing some sick joke on you. As you look up your eyes meet with a pair of blue eyes staring you down. You smile shyly at the hockey player not knowing how to respond to someone who never responded to your text. Jack took that as an invitation to join you.

“You never called,” He says as he sits down.

“I texted but you never responded,” You say nervous you’d get turned down in person this time.

“What are you talking about? I was so excited to see you again because I wanted to get your number the first time we met but I thought it would be weird if I asked after almost giving you a head injury. I would’ve noticed if you texted me,” He rambles and you just pull out your phone to show him the message. He clicks around on your phone until his eyes get wide.

“I gave you the wrong number,” Jack says with a blush on his face. You feel that maybe your tables are turning. Instead of fate working against you, maybe they just wanted you two to meet a couple of times.

“Third times a charm right?” You smile at him as he fixes his number in your phone. You two fall into conversation once again before he checks the time.

“I have to go but I can’t leave until you agree to go on a date with me,” Jack says with a hopeful gleam in his eyes. You just nod knowing that someone was finally betting on your love life.

[zcinderone]

An ironically conspicuous yet never exploited(except by me as far as I can see) dot that connects everything which could be the ultimate layer of secret to unravel the true identity of Arei's murderer...

It's Levi and this is where the final piece of puzzle comes to make sense of itself: the Monotv recruiting Teruko do CAULKING scene!!!

This is such a detailed and prominant plot that so far made 0 sense as to its connection to the case. Monotv must have enlisted a helper to clean up the mess left in the gym. Since he can't even do caulking, it is 100% valid for the narrative that there are something in this mess he can't handle. This helper would have abundance of time to figure out the mechanism and took the tape. (whereas both Ace and Eden only had cursory glances at the scene also in a rather shocking and intense scenario to figure out how Nico's mystrious setup worked)

(Monotv specifically mentioning he needs help to do certain chores)

Apart from the 4 involved in Ace's case, the only one awake/available late at night was Levi(and we never know for what purpose the story writer specifically left only him awake and readily came out to check the commotion either). This connects everything.

Think about it rationally. It makes absolutely no sense for those involved in the previous case to make an imitation of their own. On paper, only 4 people knew what happened, and Nico ran off leaving the only necessary tool(tape) to replicate this. Should any of the 3 try to imitate a crime only they knew and able to replicate, they are basically yelling they're the only targets from the get-go (and isn't this what's happening right now?)which is beyond absurd. However, if a third party does exist, it changes everything, they would have everything to gain from pulling an imitation since the premise would exclude their possibility permanently.

Based on the aforementioned points, I will make a tentative prediction about one event we are likely gonna see in ep 15（or 16 depending on pacing）: A scrum debate will happen soon, concerning whether or not Ace&Eden really is the only option scope for imitation crime, for they will most certainly discuss the very reason why they imitate and promptly realized the absurdity thereof. The narrative would seem really off if they don't dabble on why, accepting imitation for the sake of imitation. Some will take the stance that such attempt would be illogical for a rational conspirator in the first place, others will insist on the lack of direct evidence of a third party.

(I just realized the dev could've intentionally let Ace kick the tape out of sight because they have much greater incentive to do so but it's very close to premiere so I won't elaborate since either way my theory itself is the same)I am basing this theory on the assumption that the tape went missing under the dialogue box cg is dev's mistake, because the tape on the ground scene always includes Ace on the ground and the moment he stood it changed which feels too abrupt and dev might just forgot to add that, and there is not a single scene that showed the tape missing without such blockade.

More importantly, there were some clues to back my assumption in the "i'm not fxxing dead!" scene. The tape is placed rather near in front of Ace, a little to our right. Yet, when he stood up he knocked Eden out to our left. It would seem shaky if we take this alone by face value as it could just be a dramatic effect, but what happened afterward is the camera itself clearly turned left to film Eden gradually standing, and turned right to focus on Ace and then turned further right to focus on Teruko, which clearly suggested the actual positioning is: Eden Ace (tape?) Teruko (tape ?) . Problem is, the tape still exitsted right before, and went missing right after Ace stood up under the Teruko "yeah i figured" dialogue box, few secs before Eden stood up, therefore her positioning would exclude her possibility of getting it. And Ace couldn't get it either since four eyes were, and the camera was mostly on him, even depicting him reaching his wound with two hands.

I think If the dev did had such meticulous intent for this hidden scene to be the key to locking the culprit, they would most likely be equally meticulous about either the tape's positioning or Ace's act to make unequivocal sense that one of them would have a clear window to obtain it, which in turn suggests they probably never had such intention to begin with.

Also, we got to consider factoring in complementary details like the starched clothes ball(Levi was the only one who mentioned being in the laundry room some time at night in ep10),Eden mentioning "someone's been following her" (I'm 100% sure this is what the dev planted to make sense of why a 3rd party could overhear Eden&Arturo&Arei event), Arei's missing glove(both Eden and Ace wears glove, Levi doesn't), enough strength to throw the rope near the ceiling(they emphasized early in one scene how high the ceiling is and eden is the smallest girl) Whit trying to make an argument about another motive Levi could have for killing Arei yet got cut off, and trying to redirect the crew's attention back to Levi's secret itself for some reason and got cut off again in ep13 11:22 12:44 (this i think is super super important and it seems only I was mentioning this). These solid details are all adding to the likelihood of Levi, and I really can't find as many other details to back Eden or Ace.

I also had a secondary theory back when ep13 dropped might worth mentioning: could the fish simply be symbolic? Sleep with the fish(godfather thingy)? Levi's background story suggests he is very likely involved in mafia conficts. J even asked him if he was "in" the mafia to which he prompt answered No. But very interestingly the dev specifically gives him a pondering "..." scene immediately after his respond to show he seemed to be thinking about the definition of his involement, then J pushed him to elaborate and he digressed.(starting from ep13 1:28) And Levi did have Italian surname.

I don't have that much confidence in this intepretation alone to begin with as I thought it is a bit old school. But since my major theory makes sense, this one doesn't seem so far-fetched anymore.

[physalian]

So, I’ve written posts utterly baffled by writers who think tackling the intimate nuances and complexities of minorities/ disabilities/ neurodivergences that they don’t have based on ego and research is just easy and no one will notice. But like… there aren’t rules for any of these demographics. All aces don’t think the same way, that’s why there’s like 20 different specific labels under the ace/demi umbrella.

But the reason I don’t think anyone can get by on research alone if this character’s quirk (for simplicity’s sake) is the whole plot and their defining feature is this: There is no ‘default’ person and the 50s-esque model citizen was a caricature. Odds are somebody isn’t “perfectly normal” just with one little outlier trait. We’re all different mixes and blends so saying “I’m gonna write a gay dude, I read this one blog by a gay dude and I’m an expert” is just. No.

This is also assuming that it’s realistic for your character to be absolutely certain about themselves and can diagnose or label themselves with medical accuracy. We’re all just vibin’, you know? Some might, and kudos to them, still wierd to so confidently write something you researched like cramming the night before a final.

Like, if you tell me you wrote an ace, and you yourself are straight or simply not ace and have no ace friends or relatives and just thought it would be cool, but your book is an intense deep-dive into asexuality, I’d bet very good money that it is not, in fact, a deep dive into asexuality, just your extrapolation based on a modicum of research and your own biases.

You’re missing out on so much personal context. I’m ace. Also, possibly aro? But also unofficially diagnosed as autistic and I can’t get a real diagnosis because reasons. And everyone is different so I don’t know where the boundary lies between “this is an autistic thing” and “this is an ace thing” and “this is an aro” thing. You, intrepid author, can’t expect to articulate that if a real person living with it can’t.

You can’t articulate it, because I can’t articulate it, and I’m probably contradicting myself all over the place in a giant game of mental Twister. Like. Romance sounds great, but I’m also fiercely independent and am too used to doing everything alone to actually picture being a healthy team and not having to carry it like groupwork in high school. That image just does not compute.

Or, romance sounds great, but I can’t love you the way you expect and odds are I’m not going to want to sleep with you… but I’ll watch your favorite TV show with you and I’ll buy you that box of candy that you probably forgot you mentioned wistfully wanting last week and I’ll make sure the fridge is stocked with your favorite snack and I’ll do the driving and I’ll text you memes and funny pictures and song recommendations to make you smile and I’ll do 100 other things desperately trying to make up for the guilt of both wanting you to find me attractive, but not actually finding you attractive, but it's actually finding the effort I make and the choices within my power that I want you to find attractive and not 'nice ass' or whatever, of wanting you around and wanting love, but not wanting sex and I guess if you cheat but it's "just sex" I have to deal because you've got "needs" and you're "normal" and I'm lucky to have you around without putting out. While simultaneously daydreaming about an imaginary person who doesn't expect those 100 other things done from guilt, but I got bills to pay and can't be selfish and, well, that person doesn't exist.

But sure, your ace is gutwrechingly realistic because they're an android or an alien and are incapable of a sex drive anyway and not human because, what? All humans have a sex drive, you donut. You just haven't met the right person yet.

No one is just one thing in isolation and otherwise “perfectly normal”. The arrogance and naivety it takes from so many writers who think this can’t be shocked when the negative feedback comes in. Write inclusively. Do not write the deeply personal struggles of a life you did not live, that someone reading your book can look at and think, wow, I can’t believe how wrong they got it. Do I expect to read a perfect copy of myself in someone else's ace charcater? No. Every ace is different, but there's the "ace" flag for a reason.

[setmeatopthepyre]

Bucktommy breakup (arc) mix

I started making this playlist pretty much right after 8x06 in order to cope with all the feelings, first just throwing together some songs, later structuring them into their own little emotional arc. Prepare for all the stages of grief but with a generous sprinkle of love, more than a few winks, nods and references, and a dash of hope for reconciliation at the end. Song list with lyric highlights below. Bon appetit!

(There's a couple of references and half-jokes hidden here and there, so let me know if you catch those. Also if you're curious at all about any of my choices or why a certain song is included, please ask me. I love yapping about this shit and have 100% overthought this playlist a million times.)

--

Built to Break (Glitterfox) - Every thread is bound to fray / I can't outrun the ending

if this was a movie.. (Kacey Musgraves) - If this was a movie / You'd run up the stairs / You'd hold my face / Say we're being stupid / And we'd fall back into place

Plain Sailing Weather (Frank Turner) - This was supposed to be easy / I found the one damn person to help me fall asleep in the night

Smalltown Boy [Bronski Beat cover] (Orville Peck) - But the answers you seek will never be found at home / The love that you need will never be found at home / Run away, turn away, run away, turn away

Scared (Joywave) - I wanna touch you but I'm scared / I really love you though, I swear / I had another nightmare / Covered in sweat and unprepared / I woke and you weren't there

La da da (Glitterfox) - I don't know what to say / My head gets in the way / I don't know what to feel / Only learned to conceal

Let Me Drown (Orville Peck) - I swear there's good things that are coming your way / And I can't be the one left here, dragging you down

Stick Season (Noah Kahan) - I thought that if I piled something good on all my bad / That I could cancel out the darkness I inherited from dad / Now I'm no longer funny 'cause I miss the way you laugh / You once called me forever, now you still can't call me back

Why Would You Be Loved (Hozier) - It's only said to be kind, the time that you have with love / You're never told, but you're loaned it // Why would you play it all on something as hollow as trust? / What if you gave it all to find that it wasn't enough?

San Andreas (Louise Burns) - The San Andreas fault line tells me stories from below / California misery in this angel town of gold

Feels Like a Lie (Joywave) - It'd be human to let it go someday / But I've got it stored above my rib cage

camera roll (Kacey Musgraves) - Chronological order and nothing but torture / Scroll too far back, that's what you get / I don't wanna see 'em but I can't delete 'em / It just doesn't feel right yet

How Far Will We Take It? (Orville Peck & Noah Cyrus) - I tried to love you, just couldn't break through / No getting used to living without you / 'Cause I've been waiting, don't wanna waste it / We're all alone now, how far will we take it?

Black Treacle (Arctic Monkeys) - And I tried last night to pack away your laugh / Like a key under the mat / But it never seems to be there when you want it

Recovery (Frank Turner) - I know you are a cynic, but I think I can convince you / Broken people can get better if they really want to / Or at least that's what I have to tell myself if I am hoping to survive

We Are All We Need (Joywave) - I was a boy who kept a list of everybody who wouldn't let me in / Sense of humor now about it / But there's a jadedness where love should have been

No Such Thing (Sara Bareilles) - Thin air, you're out there in it somewhere / If I could only get there / I could breathe again // I've tried to get over you / But I think there's no such thing

First Time (Hozier) - Before I heard it from your mouth / My name would always hit my ears as such an awful sound

Ever You're Gone (Orville Peck & Teddy Swims) - This anxious heart of mine / Gets me in and out of trouble so many times / And I keep losing pieces each time I try / I burned enough bridges to light my way home

Wanna Be Loved (The Red Clay Strays) - I just wanna be loved / I've been afraid and I've been alone / Sometimes I need someone to pick up the phone / I'm tired of leaving / I need a home

Timefighter (Lucy Dacus) - And I fought time / It won in a landslide

No Witnesses (Keaton Henson) - So I wrote down a list of all the things / We've never spoken of / And I wrote "Man, I hate Los Angeles" / And I've never been in love

Love is a Laserquest (Arctic Monkeys) - When I'm hanging on by the rings around my eyes / And I convince myself I need another / For a minute, it gets easier to pretend that you were just some lover

Haven't Been Doing So Well (Frank Turner) - And if self-loathing was a sport I'd be Muhammad Ali / 'Cause I can sting like a butterfly and sink like a bee / But they don't hand out medals to monsters like me

787 Dreamliner (Joywave) - I'm feeling dizzy just from the view / Got another six lives to lose / Before my final descent is through / Before I find my way back to you

Hot & Heavy (Lucy Dacus) - When I went away, it was the only option / Couldn't trust myself to proceed with caution / The most that I could give to you is nothing at all / The best that I could offer was to miss your calls

Burning House (Cam) - I had a dream about a burning house / You were stuck inside / I couldn't get you out / Laid beside you and pulled you close / And the two of us went up in smoke

Don't Keep Driving (The Paper Kites) The distance between us is half of this city / Don't keep on driving, let me say something / There's nothing wrong with a little space / But not right now, don't leave / Don't push me away

On Board (Alana Henderson & Joshua Burnside) - And if you came on board / I know you'd scan for the safety of a lighthouse blink / Any port in a storm, love / You promise you won't falter / But I know I've seen men sink

I Know (King Princess & Fiona Apple) - You can use my skin / To bury secrets in / And I will settle you down

Canyon (JOSEPH) - Take me to your darkest corner / Show me what you're trying to hide / I've got a little fear / But it's the reverent kind

Back At Your Door (Orville Peck & Debbii Dawson) - I'm sure the deadbolt's turned / But baby, if it weren't / I'd come quiet up the staircase / Slip into your arms / Like I was never gone

Watchman (Gregory Alan Isakov) - So take me however I seem to be / Haunted, I know

Francesca (Hozier) - My life was a storm since I was born / How could I fear any hurricane?

Noise in My Head (spookyghostboy) - Sit in the dark for a while / Look for your name on my phone / My thumb hovers over the button / It rings and you say, "Hello"

Orpheus (Sara Bareilles) - Don't stop trying to find me here amidst the chaos / Though I know it's blinding, there's a way out

Late To You (Keaton Henson) - All these years of running / Of running away / I've been looking for something / For something to feel this way

The Way I Tend To Be (Frank Turner) - But then I remember you / And the way you shine like truth in all you do

Saint Honesty (Sara Bareilles) - We're collecting evidence / Of one remarkable storm / How wild it was to find it, finally feel the climate / Instead of only staying dry and warm

[immoralimmortals]

Akatsuki Member Songs and Headcanons

I have had years to ruminate to myself on certain songs I listen to that get associated with certain Akatsuki. I'm gonna try to present some of these pairings in a comprehensive way for you guys.

I can 100% replicate this post several times over with different songs and explanations, so I most likely will. We will see! Songs are linked within the post.

Pain: Mr. FEAR by Siamés

This man wants to fix everything, and yet if you look deep enough, he is absolutely crumbling. He is the Mr. Fear, literally, to instill fear in order to bring what he dictates as peace. The song itself is simultaneously calm and chaotic. Despite how conflicted he ends up being, every single contradiction is still said as a command to the listener.

Standout lines:

I wish I had a faster therapy

I've come to mind control your needs

Just trust in me, my dear

Don't fight with me, my dear

Don't trust in me, my dear What cure is coming near?

Konan: Youth by Daughter

Youth, hope, suffering. She has experienced life in that order, and it has left her an angel in constant mourning. This song is, to me, the retrospective side of her, the part of Konan that is still a scared and hurt young lady, the place in her mind that inspires her to keep going for something better. I specifically associate this song more with her loss of Yahiko and the original Akatsuki than her actual childhood.

I could literally quote the whole song for her, so I recommend you listen if it seems interesting. Here's some painfully selected lyrics:

And if you're still breathing, you're the lucky ones 'Cause most of us are heaving through corrupted lungs

We are the reckless, we are the wild youth Chasing visions of our futures One day, we'll reveal the truth That one will die before he gets there

Collecting pictures from a flood that wrecked our home It was a flood that wrecked this home

Zetsu: Dangerous by Big Data

This song sort of changed my brain chemistry, both in general and about Zetsu. If you pair the (honestly very strange and parodic) music video with the content of the lyrics, it creates an idea of heightened awareness of insidious knowledge and, though it is meant about modern advertisements, I also take it about being spied on in general, being dangerous because of your knowledge of the world against you. When I started associating this song with Zetsu, I began seeing him more as an active character than one that merely is there. His spying has purpose, he has motives.

Standout lines:

You understand, they got a plan for us I bet you didn't know that I was dangerous

Nobody's listening when we're alone Nobody's listening, there's nobody listening, No one can hear us when we're alone No one can hear us, no, no one can hear us And I've gotta get out of here Sink down, into the dark

How could you know, how could you know? That those were my eyes Peepin' through the floor, it's like they know It's like they know I'm looking from the outside And creeping to the door, it's like they know

And especially if you're in a shipping mood:

It must be fate, I found a place for us I bet you didn't know someone could love you this much

Tobi/Obito: Dirty Imbecile by The Happy Fits

Being an Uchiha is hard, you know? The expectations, both from your clan and from everyone else... Obito really put the bar of achievement really high because he thought that's where he'd finally be respected, so much as acknowledged. This is a song about being much more deep down than the fool you seem to others, the righteous desire to be worth your many efforts.

Standout lines:

Damn this town and damn this city You never give me anything that I want No one seems to really care They're just wholly unaware Of all the blood and sweat I cry before dawn

Am I good? Is all I could enough for you? I'm so scared of when and where I'll find the truth

Count my little scars, I've got dozens down inside I come complete and invincible behind my dirty imbecile

Hidan: Nothing Personal by Night Riots

Relaxed yet vicious, I think this is a good pairing to think about how he must strut about, preaching of Jashin. You can't be better than him. He will always know better, be better, believe better. Self-centered prick. I adore his confidence.

Standout lyrics:

The center of the world is lonely me Float along through the catacombs The endless cycle, flesh to bones

I’ll be the king, you’ll be the filth I wash away Nothing personal, personal, personal I am the light, I am the truth, I am the way Nothing personal, personal, personal

I’ll take your crown, I’ll make it mine As you sulk your days away Numb yourself and think of me

Kakuzu: Ain't No Rest for the Wicked by Cage the Elephant

I highkey associate a lot of the themes from the Borderlands series with Kakuzu, featured songs included. This song is pretty self evident to me, overtly about how money motivates people. In my view of Kakuzu, he has crafted over his many decades of war and hardship this encompassing, compassionless worldview of why people do things. If you say "money is the only thing that matters" and you're older than like, a five year old who got their first dollar, you are going to have a strong and elaborate justification for it. It's a song about hard truths about humanity, some things that will never change and you need to accept without taking it personally.

Standout lyrics:

Oh there ain't no rest for the wicked Money don't grow on trees I got bills to pay, I got mouths to feed There ain't nothing in this world for free Oh no, I can't slow down, I can't hold back Though you know, I wish I could Oh no there ain't no rest for the wicked Until we close our eyes for good

He made it clear he wasn't looking for a fight He said, "Give me all you've got, I want your money, not your life But if you try to make a move, I won't think twice" I told him, "You can have my cash, but first you know I gotta ask What made you want to live this kind of life?"

I saw a preacher man in cuffs, he'd taken money from the church He'd stuffed his bank account with righteous dollar bills But even still I can't say much because I know we're all the same Oh yes, we all seek out to satisfy those thrills

Deidara: Fear & Delight by The Correspondents

Brief aside: gorgeous music video, very skillfully made. Deidara would love it. Certainly a mastercraft of editing and camera tricks.

Dynamic, vibrant song. My partner has used this song as a pairing with another character, comparing the love interest in the song to courting something you really probably should not be. Deidara courts with destruction and death with absolute abandon. His art is beautiful. His art will hurt him. He's so, so okay with that.

In addition, I think this song describes really well how he approaches things that are novel and perhaps frighten him.

It is, again, literally the whole song but here's a couple of lines:

I'm a little boy that's gonna be getting his fingers burned But I can see this lesson's gotta, gotta, gotta be learned

In any case, my friends, it's too late Like a moth to light, like a beast to bait And I know the black widow eats its mate

I'm an innocent being seduced by your charms I'm a young boy tickled to death in your arms Your kisses taste like bitter almonds

Addiction pulling me to a grave end You're an enemy who I'm keen to defend Down the black hole of my lust I descend

Why is it that I'm keen to be devoured by you When there's the option of a love affair that's pure and true? I always choose the dungeon over the sea view

It's wrong but I want you tonight

Sasori: Body by Mother Mother

This guy hates every inch of his human body. As soon as he realized he could change himself, every cell of skin, every drop of blood, every breath of air was cursed. As long as he is flesh and bone, he suffers. This includes even the barest hint of humanity in the cylinder that is his heart. If he could get rid of it, he would. The body only exists to get in the way. He will break these confines.

It is. Yet again. Just the entire song that works for him. Here are a few lines:

Take my eyes, take them aside Take my face, and desecrate Arms and legs, get in the way Bodies break

'Cause I've grown tired of this body A cumbersome and heavy body I've grown tired of this body Fall apart without me, body

Kisame: Promiseland by Mika

It's no secret I adore thinking about Kisame's worldview, and I think this song is a wonderful insight into it. He is the definition of disillusioned, trying to find out what he can really depend upon, if anything. He has nothing to lose. He's already lost it all.

Standout lyrics:

Sold my soul, broke my bones, tell me, what did I get? Did my time, toed the line, ain't seen anything yet Strike me down to the ground, you know I've seen it before Make it hurt, I'll eat the dirt, I just don't care anymore

I kept my promise, man, show me the promiseland

And the whole world's bringing me down

One person's lie is just another man's truth We kept on running from the devil, but the devil was you Every time I see the light, I'm falling deeper in debt If I've never seen the good, how can it come to an end?

Itachi: The Villain I Appear to Be by Connor Spiotto and Molly Pease

Itachi puts his mission first before anyone's impression of him, even that of his beloved brother. However, he can still yearn for his understanding, his respect. The song reflects on doing the right thing without slowing down to explain, lest it be too late, and hoping the pieces may be put together later. Maybe it'll be in your favor, maybe not. That doesn't matter as much as the outcome of your actions.

Standout lyrics:

Nothin' left to do but Try to take the leap and follow through And that's exactly what I'll do

I don't plan on slowing Down, no I'll keep on going Even if you think I'm in the wrong

I know that's what I'm here for I don't wanna wait around anymore Even if you can't see The good inside me

I don't have the time to tell you Why I do the things that I do Just please hold on and soon you'll see That I'm not the villain I appear to be

And I know you think I'm crazy But I hope that maybe Now you'll see why I had to try

[p-receh]

There's an au prompt that I am heavily interested in. And this is also the base of what I want to write in my story. I personally love this au. Not many people dwell deeper in this au (I knew some but not know much for outdonesian people. Whereas in Indonesian fandom, this thing is quite rare... I guess. But that rarity is like find a needle in a hay stack, or find a golden in the mud.... ^^')

"These two anonymous made me overthink late at night. It made me speculate how are the elementals gonna do if Oboi is gone someday? they are immortals yet their master is a human.

But this is my favorite kind of troupe. Immortal and mortal, hahahaha. Normally the ones who couldn't move on are the immortals."

[Pict no.1]

'If we think deeper, The elementals are older than Oboi himself, right? They were born in the various Power Spheres and then founded by the kings, The Chiefs, and even mere citizens. All this time, it turns out halitaugem(Halilintar, Taufan, and Gempa) and others are already 100+ years old.'

[Pict no. 2]

'The Elementals are older than Oboi, aren't they. Imagine the 7 elementals saying their gratitude to Oboi for their safety as if he protected their lives and did not misuse them, and they will vow to guard Oboi, the purest elemental wielder of them all.'

Different tweet but still indirect to the op.

"Halilintar: "He's only a kid who just got his power, he probably will get hurt because of us."

Taufan: "What if he abuses it when he's older like a certain guy?"

Gempa: "I know, however, I want to put my trust in someone one more time."

.

Gempa: "You guys want to join me?"

Halilintar & Taufan: *smiling* "Definitely."

Whether if the immortals unable to move on or not. These kind of concept where the elementals passing their duty after their last master is really tempting. Imagine this could be Oboi's himself dies of old age and he left his energy to let all elementals become the real humans; or in the last battle, before he gone, Oboi use his final move to let him split into seven. And after that, all elementals lived in the future.

In my mind, the settings are a bit different.

Thousand years in the future. All planets are destroyed and Quabac is the last remaining planet. All survivors from the destroyed planet moved to Quabac and created nations based on fallen planets. The planet's names are the names of nations same with their background settings(Still in draft and a bit generic.) :

Gugura is a dumpster city.

Windara, a steampunk nation above the clouds.

Rimbara a forest wonderland for villagers.

Baraju, two military nations that became the planet's first defense system, and-

Gur'latan, a high-tech cyberpunk city and the central nation of the planet.

The people lived under control and their fate was already decided by the mighty emperor who never showed it's face. All elementals lived separately with no past memories.

Until a certain worker who lived inside the rusty house, found an unordinary watch that triggered a nightmare. The sound of pain and shout that he felt he experienced even though he was sure he never remembered any of those throughout his life. Suspicious theories occur when he sees the legendary TAPOPS logo, who supposed to be a myth in children's tales.

More mysteries arise after he sees the mirror of himself at the barter station in some city of Gugura, or so he thought. A man in all white cloth was just sent by Gur'latan authorities to collect data. Coincidentally.

That's when they meet and their nightmares have become more clear and the fact that they are not alone already tells there's something wrong with their past to this day.

...

That's all for now I guess. I got this idea during my discussion with @nerizys (Apologies for tagging your name🙏). Still trying to make it more of a proper prompt since I'm suck in english.

... Really want it to make into a full story though... :*

[skruffie]

I'm rather deep in my head at the moment thinking about my dad and there's a small part of me that is thinking "truly he wasn't always like this" but then another part of me that's like

am I absolutely certain of that

Because the thing is even if there was a time period where he wasn't Like This, it was so long ago and he's been like this for the majority of my life that I don't think it matters who he used to be lmao

throwing the rest under a cut because it gets long

Like, I'm trying to do a deep dive back when things were good and we were a family of four but the ultimate thing that I keep coming back to is that my whole life I've always been closer to my mom. She was the activities mom before Nicole got sick and stuff that I did with my dad wasn't solely with my dad, it was us as a whole family unit. The things we did do together were things like going to the bookstore for a couple hours to just be out of the house and read, but we didn't actually spend that time together--we were in different parts of the store.

The most transparent one on one time that I can actually recall was when Nicole had been hospitalized for two months for her stem cell transplant. Mom stayed at the hospital for those two months (City of Hope is not like other hospitals; there's temporary housing for families either as small apartments or, how my mom did it, borrowing grandpa's RV and living in it) and dad was still working, but because I was 10 they needed to figure out where to put me so I still had like. adults. in my life. I lived with my grandparents for those two months and dad basically lived alone at our house, but every evening after work he'd come spend time with me and we'd talk and work on jigsaw puzzles. Like, actually talk. I don't remember much about what but I remember the feeling of looking forward to seeing him every night and he was consistent with it.

A few months ago when Alice and I were hanging out I made some kind of offhand remark about how my parents fight with each other, which is like screaming matches etc slamming doors that kind of thing and I said it like it was the normal way that people fight. VB was like "uh, what you said?? that's not normal"

and I was like "huh?"

Why I'm bringing all this up and bringing back Bek Blogging About Family Problems? Well, he was determined to try to ruin Thanksgiving this year by acting like somehow the chronic illnesses and food problems my mom has, that we have collectively been dealing with as a family for like 15 years and have easily adapted to doing, was suddenly a federal fucking issue to a point where mom was packing bags to stay at a hotel for a couple weeks. I kinda talked her down from that.

The days leading up to that, I had texted my dad a question about something in his field of expertise for a friend who runs a business, but in the short conversations I had with him about it he had this sort of clipped, impatient tone talking to me and for the first time I just had this lightbulb thought that hasn't left me: he resents me. It didn't hurt at all to realize that, which is probably telling. Thanksgiving rolls around, mom is making herself physically absent and keeps ducking upstairs to give herself space and this fucking guy looks at me and asks "Did we do something to upset her?"

I just went back into my main blog as well as my sideblog where I contain the uh more bleak aspects of my mental health blogging+venting to try to refresh my memory and see if he's always been like that, and he kinda has!

There's just these little moments that I remember that have always stuck with me that I've held onto for years, and it's this feeling that I firmly, 100% believe that my dad thinks I am a much worse person than I actually am. There's no basis in reality for this. I will never forget once when I was like 19 or 20 I made some kind of remark about how I don't have an addictive personality and he said with full confidence "Yes you do."

and I was like ????? and he continued with "Yes you do, it just hasn't come out yet"

Tick-tock dad I'm pushing 35 and I'm still waiting to see if this addictive personality is going to pop out? It's really rich hearing that from the man with 2 DUIs, a rehab stint, who brought meth into our house and smoked it, who woke me up to sign off on the AA meetings he wasn't going to, who got a breathalyzer installed in the car, who served house arrest, who pushed me to stop talking about his alcoholism on social media because he didn't want his dad to see, like it goes on.

We were just at my parent's house last night because papa was going back home today and my dad kept baiting Alice about like, George RR Martin and other dumb shit. Alice made the decision today to not be around my dad in the future because after six years of him she's fully done. After the Thanksgiving fiasco my mom was saying she's going to push for marriage counseling, to push him into actually getting like an established primary care physician because this man does not go to the doctor, and also push him into getting therapy, but I've heard this over and over again for most of my life. He doesn't drink anymore but the behavior is the same. I don't think mom is sticking to her ultimatums but after over 30 years of dealing with him I feel less afraid about doing that. Alice put up with 6 and said no more. I kind of feel like if my dad wants to maintain any kind of relationship with me he needs to go with mom's plan. He can point out I rarely call or visit all he wants, but he'll need to reflect on why that is.

[summeroflove-if]

Let's talk about the feedback I've received...

Every response was 100% anonymous, and most of what I've received is very helpful, so I just want to go through some of the stuff I've been told and what I'm implementing. And more responses are welcome.

Scene Length

46.2% of the people who have filled it out think that the scenes are just long enough, 38.5% of the people who have filled it out think they were too short, 7.7% of you said they were too long, and 7.7% of you essentially said 'most are just right, but some are too short.'

The breakfast scenes are mostly being extended, but it depends on who you're coupled up with and the choices you've made - for example, it's possible to have an argument with Anwar, so that part won't be extended for obvious reasons.

The bedtime scenes won't be extended on the first night (they're intended to be a little too short, indicated by the producers turning off the light too quick), but future bedtime scenes will be longer.

Choices

Most people are happy with the number of choices, but some people want more flirty choices and others want more reserved options, so there may be more options in future.

I would also like to note that I have coded scenes that are affected by the stats, but if no one is seeing those changes, then they're not strong enough (for example, Mattie can kiss MC instead of Vanessa in the challenge if MC's stats are a certain level).

I am working on a personality quiz for the beginning of the game, just to set a base level - it's very generic but does strongly set your stats so be intentional about your choices when it comes in.

Character Customisation

Some people want more customisation, which has partially been added - for example, someone wanted more transfeminine options, which has been included, but it's been put at the start, just after gender, so it's set from the beginning.

I have also added the option to set your height from between 5'1 and 6'4 - those numbers were picked so Mattie stays the shortest, and Theo remains the tallest. I have considered adding body types (slim, curvy, athletic, etc.) but other than being for flavour, it doesn't impact the game very much and I'm hesitant to add it when there are plenty of details I can already refer to.

Someone asked for piercing options, which are already in the public demo in the same place you decide whether to have tattoos.

Regarding the request for prosthetics or medical equipment, I sadly have to say no. I am a disabled, chronically ill person with a lot of experience with other disabled and chronically ill people, but I cannot make the adaptions needed in this case while doing justice to the game - it's just too complicated.

As said in the past, the Villa is wheelchair accessible, and there are staff on site to help in medical terms, so you are free to imagine your character as disabled and/or chronically ill, but I cannot write that.

Finally, I will not code the game to allow MC to be straight or gay. I appreciate where people are coming from, but the cast is advertised to be all bi - MC would not be allowed on the show unless they were into 2+ genders. You can lock yourself out of routes if you directly turn them down, so if you're not interested and you get the chance, just do that.

Other comments

There will be more alone time with your partner, but please remember you are only on the second day, so people are still learning about each other.

Secondly, you were supposed to couple up on first impressions, not based on any personality. Yes, you can chat with Anwar and Haoyu, but that's it for a reason - and even Haoyu thinks he's a bit nuts for asking to couple up with MC before meeting the others.

Finally, I'm not going to tell you who's truly interested in MC, who's just playing along, etc - the point is to find out for yourself. This means there will also be no POVs from the ROs perspective and I won't be answering the asks about it.

[lost-in-faith]

Unconditional Love: Yourself.

I wonder if there are people who really exist out there that love themselves unconditionally. 100% Every single part, and that have always been that way.

I haven't always been that way. I'm not totally convinced that I am that way now, but life has shown me so many reasons why loving yourself entirely (and unconditionally) is so important.

It's so easy to love yourself when you're looking good. It's easy to love yourself when you notice that you lit up the party. It's easy to love yourself when everything in your life seems to be going well.

It's not easy to love yourself when you can't find the right outfit in a closet full of clothes. It's not easy to love yourself when your phone hasn't rang in a few days. It's not easy to love yourself when you feel like you're trying so hard to do things right and everything seems to be going wrong.

But why? Why do we feel like only under certain circumstances are we deserving of love and acceptance? The truth is, we are all ALWAYS deserving of feeling loved, appreciated and worthy at all points of our lives. Up or down, good or bad.

I had to learn to stop beating myself up when I did something wrong. I had to learn to stop beating myself up when I didn't do something to the best of my abilities. I had to learn to love myself when faced with mistakes I've made in the past.

I can't pinpoint the exact moment when I came to this conclusion, I am just eternally grateful that I realized it at all...

Even if you vent to someone about absolutely everything, and you tell them how you feel and you describe the ache in your gut when you feel down or in despair.. they might say they understand it, but they will never share that feeling with you. Yes, they might have felt it as well, but when you are feeling it and it is living inside of you, you are alone with it. You have to make peace with it, and you have to be able to pick yourself up to carry on.

I tried a healing exercise that I came across on tiktok and it basically said to envision yourself as a child, and envision the present you walking up to them, picking them up and telling them that everything is going to be okay. Although in the moment, I felt like the childhood me felt safer, it was just a fleeting feeling, and it didn't actually fix any trauma I have buried deep inside of me.

What did resonate with me about this exercise was that, I was the one saving myself. After that, I found myself envisioning hugs, words of encouragement, or giving myself tough love. And I always felt better.

Which brought me to the thought- why do I have to keep saving myself? Why not just walk myself through it while it was happening? I kept picturing a strong, calm version of myself walking me through these difficult times as if this person who accompanied me was a stranger. But it's me.

If I have to picture someone else giving me this unconditional love, it is because subconsciously I understand that I do deserve it and I was no longer willing to allow myself to live another day without it.

Me today:

I am happy. Yes, I still can get sad very easily, but it is not a familiar feeling anymore. I no longer have a home in my sorrows. I know that by loving myself all the time, I do not feel alone, nor is it too hard to pick me right back up if I stumble.

Mistakes are inevitable, and although I understand that they suck, I also understand that it happens, and tomorrow is another day to make something better.

I do not always have 100% to give everyday, and I no longer carry the guilt on for a week. If there is a day when I'm too tired to play, I might give my son a little extra screen time. If there's a night where work kicked my ass and I had to run a million errands, I might just order dinner instead of cooking it and I don't feel like a lazy mom. Cause I love myself on those days, no different than I love myself on the days where I give it my all and don't even break a sweat. If no one else on this planet will love me exactly how I need to be loved, exactly how I require it, the least I can do is give it to myself.

Learning how to have unconditional love for myself (which for me- translates to having patience, compassion for myself, understanding towards myself) has not only allowed me to thrive in different aspects of my life, it has taught me how to be unconditional for the people in my life. It has taught me how to show up for myself, and how to show up for them. It has taught me that although life can get hard- I will not add on to that burden. I will never do it to myself again. And learning how to do this- I will always show unconditional love for the universe.

[ikamigami]

With yesterday's therapy session with Earth that confirmed that Solar is indeed their cousin, with Solar and Earth confirming it so, do you think that one person, starts with a T and ends with an S, will apologize for the false information they spread about: "Solar is not their cousin, he's a family friend" ? The same false information that anon-shippers used to harass multiple artists. Because I doubt it. That person has always been so pretentious about their interpretations and always believed their interpretations are right, and talking dumb to other people or straight up shutting them down because they have the mentally of "Only my interpretation is right!" They owe those artists an apology because it's their loud false information that started the harassments

It was obvious that Solar sees himself as a part of a family.. so I'm not surprised that they would confirmed it sooner or later..

Honestly, I doubt that they'll apologize because they never apologized to me for something worse so sadly I don't think they'll apologize..

I'm aware that I'm also loud about my interpretations and I definitely come off as being pretentious.. but I try to remember to write that "I think this or that", "in my opinion this or that" etc. I'm sure that I don't always remember about it..

Nonetheless, you're right, dear anon that shippers you mentioned were most definitely spreading misinterpretations because larger blogs approve them. But the worst part is that because they follow those bigger blogs they feel "confident" (which is not so hard when you're sending asks as anon) to harass others who don't agree with them. This is the sad reality of many fandoms actually.

And sadly, you're right that the person you're talking about is talking dumb to anyone who disagree with them.. I tasted the sample of this attitude on Discord which is one of the reasons to why I left...

I'll use my answer to you, dear anon, to share my piece of mind on something. I think that sending asks as anon isn't a bad thing because I totally understand the feeling of dread and nervousness that accompanies you when you want to ask about something you're not 100% sure of or that you're scared that others will start harassing you for your opinion.

But it's definitely easy to hide yourself behind anonymous mask to spread misinformation and hate and harass others. But here's the thing - everyone can hide behind this mask. Even the bigger blog in question. Why am I saying this? I'm trying to tell you, dear anon and everyone else that those who spread the hate are in minority. This minority is loud so it may seem as majority. I think that's important to remember because some people like to stir drama. So we need to remind ourselves that the person who spreads hate and harass others is just a really petty individual. Whoever that is. They just always try to make others feel alone and isolated. I'm definitely not pointing my finger at anyone. Because I don't like accusing others of anything. But let's not be afraid to report said anons to Tumblr. It doesn't matter how big this person may be in certain circles. We definitely shouldn't be afraid to speak up about such things.

No one should harass others. Shippers or not. It works for everyone. But remember one thing (I'm talking in general) pointing out someone's wrongdoings that we have a proof of IS NOT HARASSMENT. People are allowed and should talk about those things because such behaviour shouldn't be allowed. But I respectfully ask everyone to not harass those mentioned here and please don't use my response to harass anyone.

Thank you ^^

Have a nice day or night, dear anon 💗

[jamietwat]

I am so curious about your writing process. I’m reading Bizarre Love Triangle and I’m absolutely bewildered by both how cohesive it is and how fast you post.

Like when Keeley asked to go running with Roy and Jamie last chapter, several chapters after Jamie initially invited her in Amsterdam. Did you know that was coming when you wrote the Amsterdam scene, thus making it work on two levels to establish that Keeley needed space and to set up this later scene? Or was it a coincidence?

Do you outline? In detail? Or just have a general vibe for what happens in each chapter. Or do you figure out plot points as you go? How do you write so fast? Do you write throughout the day or sit down at a certain time and just bang out a bunch of words?

Feel free to entirely ignore this ask. I’m just so fascinated about your entire process and I know I love gushing about writing so if you want to share anything about your process, I would be interested in reading about it

Okay, I absolutely love this question and an excuse to get into it 👀

Like all of my writing, this turned out far longer than I anticipated so my apologies in advance and I'm gonna pop a read more in now

Sometimes I sit down to specifically try to write and finish off a chapter, but a lot of the progress before that is from writing stuff on my phone throughout the day when my brain is on it or when I have a minute. Also, after almost every chapter there's like a day where I don't write at all or write like 100 words and then a point when I go into super writing mode. Almost all of what I write is written in a not necessarily chronological order within the chapter itself but most chapters I work on when I'm on them without jumping ahead with a few exceptions when something wouldn't get out of my head enough that I ended up writing it before going to the chapter I was actually on

Most things are intentionally dropped knowing that I'm coming back to them and when and there are still a bunch of setups hanging all over the place for things we're still coming to. Some things set up stuff pretty close to them (like Colin's aren't you worried Roy's going to cut your dick off now that you're both dating Keeley and Jamie being like no vs when they're sharing a bed the same night and Jamie's internally like Roy is so going to cut my dick off if he finds out I'm bi after this). But lots of them are for things further off and generally, I already know that I'm going to drop the hint at that point before I even get to that point

There's a lot of stuff I put in on purpose and laughed thinking about how it would come back up later. I've already gotten back around to a good chunk of them, but I still have lots of those left to get back to too. The first thing that comes to mind for one that I still have left open is how this is going to come back around later and make a liar of Roy when the team finds out about Roy and Jamie

Occasionally, I think oh this would work with that and throw it in later on without it having originally been foreshadowing, but most of it is intentionally there with the intention of coming back to it

There's the rare time where something's a coincidence (like something next chapter that I realized fit very well with something in the first chapter when rereading some of the older sections without realizing how well it connected before then)

And then ironically, the Jamie asking Keeley to run thing is kind of the exception where originally I was going to have her go at one point with them in Amsterdam and have it contribute more to her being like oh my god I need alone time when suddenly they're inviting her along every day and she's like absolutely not but instead the first chapter of it went how it did and the second chapter skipped ahead to her needing a break and her not going fit so much better but I knew I was also leaving it open for her to go with them later at some point

I just didn't realize it would be last chapter until I was already writing it and saw the direction the morning sections were going and went okay, this is a good time to add this in

And then in terms of outlining, I've reached a point where I end up having to do some level of outline for the chapters but I didn't do that at the start. And how detailed the outline is depends on how hard it is to make sure things go in the right order. But a whole lot of what happens in what order is still just in my head

Since the very start, it's been a lot of holding everything in my head and knowing a lot of what was coming in the long run and short run. And at that point, I wasn't writing things down as a plan but I could benchmark where things happened on the calendar in my head for the June stuff easily like

which weekend was Father's Day meant the team had to find out about them at Sam's restaurant the weekend before

Phoebe had to already know about the Roy and Keeley part before that because of the Cora and Roy conversation before they went to Sam's restaurant

Pride had to come after Father's Day and before the end of school

The end of school had to be where stuff like Leanne asking Roy out showed up

Then off-season stuff was more vaguely in my head like

the stuff with Phoebe around a lot has to go in there and be there some before they go on the trip

but they have to go early enough that Jamie's piercings have time to start healing before pre-season training

And I kind of knew what had to happen before pre-season training, during it, and during actual season

And I generally know the order that the big stuff happens but some of the stuff I moved around in a swapping around the order of plot points kind of way but still keeping them mostly the same (like originally Roy was not going to find out about the pegging thing before the Pride game and it was going to be a chunk after but that worked better when I got going)

Also, some stuff changed in a bigger way longer ago where I decided against the original plan for whatever reason (like originally Keeley was going to meet Cora at the first game of the season, but then that was too long of a wait and Roy bringing around her before then intentionally made more sense so it made way more sense to put her in the Father's Day chapter)

And as far as an organization system goes, I have like 4 systems on the go tbh and I have used some combination of them for each of the chapters since about chapter 7

Chapter 7 (the one where they make the group chat and then later go to Sam's restaurant and tell everybody and like a million things happen there) is the first one where I won't oh fuck I need to write some things down to remember what else needs put in here so it got a list like this in the notes app when I was a good chunk in and was trying to hold in my head all the stuff that had to happen still and how to make it flow in a logical order and then I did not go in that order but checked them off as I went to keep track of what I still needed to get to:

(Also some things blatantly changed between making the list and actually writing them to make them fit better with how things were moving around or to cut them because a different endpoint for the chapter was better):

And for a while it was a lot of holding things in my head and that with the chunks I needed to figure out the order to put in still

And then there was the woefully mislabelled chapters plan for where the things before the season went (with things we aren't yet or that got moved to later redacted). This was useful for a while for not forgetting things but also I don't use anymore because I remember where things are going beyond it and it was missing things past where I cut this off because it got vaguer on timeline the further off the benchmark events were

(the scratched out part there is actually happening in the next update now because it really wasn't a priority to get put there)

(also the chapter 17 part is so long because I remembered shit that had to come between what I had there and what I had as chapter 18 and added it in there and didn't bother to change the numbers even though clearly it was not going to be one chapter anymore)

The sharing the same bed casually thing got moved around for reasons also, partly keeping moving wise and partly working better a different way wise, but mostly this was just a rough estimate of where that would happen anway

Also, why is this also labelled chapter 17? Idk I probably forgot about stuff that needed to go in (which was kind of the whole point of making the list so I would hopefully remember things and add them in there and be able to refer back and not later go oh fuck this should have happened) and put them in later that day between and forgot to relabel things underneath because I was going to do it later and then made a separate note for what actually was chapter 17 and what was chapter 18

Also, there's a lot of stuff that was planned for not quite that long like Colin figuring Jamie out that still was planned for a long time before we got to them but either got missed on this list or weren't planned quite yet or didn't have a spot in the timeline yet and then everything after this on the list is spoilers for the future while also it doesn't really have that much left anyway because that was mostly sorting out the how to get from pre-Amsterdam to the start of the season without losing something important

Also, fun fact, I'm pretty sure this used to be labelled worse and that this is after I had already reworked Amsterdam being 3 chapters but maybe this is the original version. Who knows? Certainly not me... Maybe that's how there ended up being two chapter 17s

And then phone notes ended up not cutting it for trying to keep track of all the parts of a chapter and whose POV each part should be and trying to make it fairly even (except for when there was a reason not to with Keeley having a break from them) and make sure one person isn't disappearing from having a POV forever for no reason so notes app lists became less common unless I was jotting down scenes before putting them into the actual plan when I was really stuck but since chapter 16, it's mostly been

Sorting out what happens into whose POV it is and moving things around or adding in a vague something to put in if someone had way more or less in a thing like this and then adding the numbers for what order things go in and sometimes it ended up changing from this but it was mostly accurate. Also, some chapters don't have this. Some have it from before I started writing. Some have to sort it out after I have some stuff down and then went wait I've gotta figure this out

And then most also have this as a more clear what order things happen thing and making sure that one colour isn't missing for forever (also I highkey don't write their names anymore and just have the colours) (also this is a short ass list, usually there's 17-23 things on there at the start and then how long the scenes themselves end up typically determines if I end up splitting things up again)

The X there means I went never mind I don't need this and then the rest were checked off as I finished the scene. Also, usually I don't have what days things happen, that's just because I was trying to keep track of them specifically because it had to start on a Monday when Keeley was back at work after the trip and end with Roy and Keeley seeing Jamie's dad on the Saturday

Also sometimes the second part is just numbers in the colours. Sometimes there is no other system and it's just the list and what happens. Sometimes scenes get cut or added after that anyway. How much I outline or rely on the outline really depends on how confusing it is to keep track of the POVs switching to make it work out fairly evenly and without too much of someone at a time and someone else dropping off the map for too long. The Pride game one was pretty easy to keep track of because there was almost always a reason why it had to be that character's POV for that part but sometimes sorting out like this is the only way I know whose POV to use for a scene without having to change it later instead

[pantherlover]

An Artificial Night Re-Read: Part 2

Hello again! Welcome to part 2.

Chapter Four:

I want to know how Cait Sidhe royalty works sooooo badly (Is it explained more in depth in Seanan McGuire's patreon stories? I still need to read those). Only certain Cait Sidhe seem to be able to be royalty; Tybalt says Raj is the first royal to be born in his Court in 60 years, and only one of Jolgier's daughters was strong enough to be a Princess. So there seems to be a certain threshold of magic that Cait Sidhe royalty needs. What do they need it for? I thiiiiiiiiiiink I remember Tybalt mentioning something about Kings and Queens being directly connected to the Shadow Roads, but I'm not 100% sure about that. Are they also responsible for anchoring their Courts to different physical spaces?

Something I'm curious about: Tybalt's old enough to have lived through at least one Ride, possibly several. I'm pretty sure he would've been a King of Cats during it too. Why doesn't Tybalt wonder if this was Blind Michael's Ride? Especially after he hears some of the Brown kids are missing too.

Lily's knowe sounds so pretty.

I know I've already said this, but I'm still holding out hope that Lily will come back - both because I love her (she was definitely one of the people most effective at calling Toby out), and because we still don't know anything about why she came to San Francisco/her relationship with Amandine. Given what we know about Amandine now, their relationship gets more and more confusing.

Chapter Five:

I think it's interesting that Lily changes Toby's clothes like the false Queen does, although a) she only does it after she's healed Toby and b) she does keep Toby's original clothes instead of transforming them.

At first I thought Toby was missing the *very* obvious by not realizing that Luna was who Lily was referring to when she said 'ask the moon'... and then I remembered that not everyone had a Sailor Moon fixation that gave them an instant (an permanent) association between 'Luna' and 'moon', and maybe it wasn't that obvious to everyone.

I'm very curious about how Lily's clairvoyance(?) works. When she told Toby to talk to Luna, I assumed she knew that Blind Michael was behind the disappearances. But then she hears that the smell of candle wax was left behind/saw the Roads in her tea leaves and was so shaken that she dropped her cup. Is she only aware of the general path that Toby needs to take, not the specifics? (I am also very curious about what/why Lily isn't allowed to talk about certain things.)

'I can't stand other people throwing my illusions on for me. It makes my ears itch.' I'm pretty sure this is hinting at how sensitive Toby is to magic.

I will give it to Tybalt this time; it wasn't really an unfair assumption that Toby wouldn't mind him avoiding her given that she keeps insisting that she wants him to leave her alone. (He doesn't get off that easy the other times he avoids her though.)

And even though she's still kind of mad at him, Tybalt's still the first person Toby trusts to tell about her Fetch!

Chapter Six:

Okay, so it is just the purebloods who send their kids to high school. That must really suck for changelings.

'I paused, amazement overwhelming my annoyance. "Etienne, is that you?" "Oh, blast. Hello, Toby," he said, wearily. "Please don't start." "Was the phone in danger? Did they have to get a big, brave knight to guard it?"' Is this the first time we meet Etienne in the books? He's been mentioned before but I don't think we've seen him on screen. The more I re-read the more I kind of want prequel stories? Pre-series Etienne and Toby must've been hilarious.

This book, even more than A Local Habitation, demonstrates that Toby didn't corrupt Quentin; he's just Like That. Getting shot could/should have been a wake-up call for him about how potentially dangerous associating with Toby could be - instead, he's *very* upset that she won't bring him along to investigate a situation that's starting out even more dangerous than the last investigation he helped her with. (I know that it would've been really bad in the long run, but can you IMAGINE if Eira had gotten her wish to have the Crown Prince of the Westlands under her thumb - and it turned out that he's just Toby without the healing powers to get him out of messes? He would be SUCH a headache for her.)

'[Luna's] laughter died, taking the light in her eyes with it. "I rather thought you might," she said, quietly. "I'd hoped that someone else would... but it's no matter. Come along." This is the moment that Luna accepts she's going to send Toby to die, right? She'd hoped someone else would show up on a fool's quest to stop her father, but it doesn't really change anything for her that it's Toby instead. (By the way if you haven't seen it before you should definitely read this meta on Luna and then go through @words-writ-in-starlight entire Toby Daye tag they have the BEST thoughts)

That's it for this part! As always please feel free to talk to me about stuff. See you next time!

[tetrisfinished]

i'm going to brag a little

because i'm finding more and more that i'm a pretty fucking resilient person. and i can pull myself out of my anger.

and that's worth bragging about.

also, here's the thing about life....it goes on. i'm not going to pretend that i made up that saying - it's a VERY famous saying by robert frost.

how it's relevant to me is that....i have now experienced twice (2 months the first time and 1 month this time) how it feels to have yasir fuck off and leave esa and i alone.

and frankly it's not even just those 2 incidents.

there are soooo many incidents where i've experienced yasir explaining in plain daylight the truth about how much he truly values me originally and now both esa and i.

the first situation was when we weren't even married yet. it was before we got married and i asked him to apply for a student visa which he did, and it got rejected. the day he found that out, he blocked me for the whole day and when he was still angry with me he said "you're the reason i will never be able to come to canada!".

that was my number 1 clear-as-day sign that i should not have been with a man who's main purpose was to come to canada with me. he never really even liked me, i'm almost sure of it at this point. i think he's a very intelligent man. he knew he had to get married and he knew he wanted to come abroad. so he liked me and i was...a canadian passport to him.

i won't discredit the times i did feel loved by him by saying that's ALL i ever was to him. but it was a MAJOR part of it. and i can't even deny it because even if he was head over heels for me - it still would have been a major factor for him.

in any case, that was the first step. then came the living together mini angers and hurts. all the times he made excuses and nakhray and refused to come with my to my family's things or my friends' things or my family friends' things. he never really cared for me enough to actually participate in my life with me. i remember the fights we used to have where i used to say "okay fine, if you won't come to my stuff, i won't come to yours!" to which he would respond "okay don't".

or the excuses of "well my stuff is my actual family and siblings, your stuff is just your friends" and other crap.

then came the living with his sister crap. because he couldn't handle living at my parents' place so we moved to his sisters' place. in his case i will say though that my parents live in a very rural area and he came to canada in the dead of winter and of course he ended up wanting to be with his sister where she lived in the subarb but with transit etc.

after living there with his sister for a few months, then came the transition to trying to find a home for ourselves. he had by then gotten a job (night shift) and decided that just because he worked all night that all day long he would do nothing else except sleep. so when we were collectively told that we need to head out and find out own accommodations because my SiL had her own in laws coming to visit with them, i was the only one who ever did any house hunting. and when i found a place, of course he refused to even see it or come with me to the majority of the showings. and the ones that he did come with me to he was completely 100% critical about without having put in any single morsel of effort in securing the showings in the first place.

in any case, i found the place and we moved. then of course came the silisilay of eids. he refused to compromise that eid would be done together and split between my family and his and this continues to this day. i mean at this point where i'm sitting today, i am of course almost certain that i will no longer be attending eid at his family's at all. but at that time, newly married i was unwilling to disrespect him and by extension his family but even then he had no problem not showing up for me or my family.

he had no problem and he wouldn't blink twice about it.

so then of course i started looking for a place to move to - a home. that was a goal of mine...of ours, i thought, to have a house to call our own and move off renting.

but again, he was not interested, never showed any commitment and then never actually participated in house hunting. when i got the place i wanted and put in an offer, all the while yasir was quietly and completely uninvolved -- though NEVER for a lack of my trying.

and then he got pissed. when the offer went through, when it was all accepted, he got angry with me and ran away to his sisters' place.

we had to have a mediated discussion with both sides of the family until finally he decided he would live with this decision that i've made all by myself without any input from him - WHICH AGAIN, WAS NOT BECAUSE OF LACK OF ME ASKING OR BEGGING HIM TO BE INVOLVED.

but such is life, he gaslit me into believing it was my fault and i might have even believed it.

time moved on, i became pregnant. we had our kid and i stayed with my parents for a little while. he would come on the weekends. but i remember crying and begging and yelling and screaming over the phone for him to come during the week. i remember being desperate. but he wouldn't come.

he would only come on the weekends.

he still remembers that time during the thick of covid living alone as one of the best stretch of times of his life. he would stay up late playing video games with his nephew in pakistan. he would sleep in late. he would go out and do uber eats which at the time was suuuper in demand (because covid, you know) and then come home and again repeat the video games.

and he wouldn't come. even though i begged and cried. even though it was my car sitting in my driveway back at my house but he would refuse to come except on the weekends.

what was his reasoning? "it doesn't make sense". he was earning a fair bit with uber eats and he was having the time of his life with his nephew staying up all night playing video games. why would he come to his brand new child and post partum wife? why would he understand or try to understand or pretend to understand.

then of course the same shit continued - as long as we had one car, every time he needed to go somewhere or be somewhere, he would get the car because of course why not? why would i with my kid need the car ever? why would my need ever trump his?

when his family visited his sister in richmond hill, i remember he left esa and i for a week alone at home without a car. while i was working and esa was at daycare. that week i ran out of diapers and i didn't have a car. and it was winter months.

but he didn't have a care in the world. just because i said "okay, no problem, it's your family" he was okay. he didn't miss his kid. he didn't pretend to feel bad about leaving us. nothing. he showed me exactly where he would spend his time and his effort and it was not with us.

finally i pushed him and pushed him as our circumstances changed and his income increased to go buy a car for himself. buy his first ever car in his whole life (he rode a motorcycle in pakistan). i had to drag him fighting tooth and nail because he still refused to see the need for a second vehicle when he would easily up and leave esa and i in our only car.

down to the literal day that we went to pick up his car after he'd placed the order, as we were turning in to the dealership he turned to me and said "you know, i'm really only doing this because you said so - we don't need a car".

which of course made me angry and i let out some of my anger. but i got past it because i was so happy in his happiness for having purchased a car. because of course, he was happy about it. of course he was.

and despite that i was still happy afterwards, i was gaslit into believing that i ruined a perfectly good moment and milestone in his life with my anger.

lol

time moved on and now his obsession became his car. even the tiniest scratch or anything on that stupid piece of metal angered him. even if it was a spill that our TODDLER SON did, he would be angry. and then he would become angry that i wasn't hurt by it. he would accuse me - he still does to this day - that i was ruining his car on purpose. that the spills and stuff that happen in his car make me happy because i am a spiteful person.

l o l o l o l o l o l

i forgot to mention, prior to the second car fiasco, i had just purchased a brand new car. and within less than a year of driving it, yasir got into a collision in it and it was totalled.

i never once blamed him. i never once let my anger out towards him. and i guess that was largely in part because i wasn't angry. when my mom told me about the accident (it happened this way because yasir had to call her since i was in the shower at the time), i was just scared. was yasir okay? was he hurt? did he sustain any injuries?

of course, i felt sadness that my own first ever car purchase of my life had to end this way, but i never felt anger. because...I don't know i'm an adult. or a rational human being. shit happens....

anyway, so that's about where we are now. and the latest along with the tiny little things and the small things is that he's sort of made an annual trip to pakistan a tradiiton. he left from december 2023, returning end of january 2024. then he left all of december 2024 again to pakistan to visit his family.

and as soon as he returned, his other family came visiting from the states so he's basically been away for the past couple of weeks with them. this was the first time that i have not met with any of his family when they come visit, save for when i went to pick him up at the airport.

i mean, i blame them 100% because they have no problem condoning his behaviours and certainly i've seen and heard them encourage it. but ultimately, what relationship can i sustain with yasir's family if my relationship with yasir himself is so deeply wounded and broken?

none.

ALL OF THIS to say that....while i was living through each one of these events and the HUNDREDS more i haven't even mentioned here....it felt like the world was ending. when he first came to canada and refused to go places with me at the very last minute, i used to get so anxious and stressed and like "what would i say to them", "what excuse can i make?", "how can he not understand how rude this is". but eventually i got over it. and despite that everyone still asks "where is he?", "why didn't he come?", questions....i'm over that too.

things that used to feel like the end of the world are now commonplace.

and while i'm SEVERELY disappointed in myself that it took me this long to accept (going into our 8th year of marriage), i can at least say that i've lived through it all.

and frankly, i think the thing that's giving me strength to get through the most devestating part of it all is esa.

what is the most devestating part of it all? seeing esa go through the motions of having to understand and come to terms with that esa is not his father's top priority under basically ANY circumstance. and yet, esa keeps going. he keeps being happy, he keeps moving forwards, he keeps living. and you might say (and i would agree) that it's because he might not truly understand it yet at the ripe young age of 4 years old. but on a deeper level, i think he understands better than even me sometimes what he's experiencing. what's taken him much less than his 4 years of life to understand has taken me approximately 8 whole years.

so that's the source of my strength. i am determined to be happy with my son. with my amazing, kind, fucking intelligent beyond his years, considerate, respectful son.

my son who i hope to instill the appropriate priorities and investment of his time in. my son who i hope genuinely looks at his father to understand that that is the experience that should NOT be imparted from a father to his son or a husband to his wife.

my son who maybe will have to suffer the worst of the hurt between his parents but who....must live on. because nothing lasts forever.

but for my son's sake...i must be happy with me and my life. and for my son's sake i am trying.

so here's to new years, new beginnings, resolving to be a certain way and then just....being.

much love,

k

[rollercoasterwords]

☕️ the prank! how do u think it went down, when, howd it affect their trust or timeline of getting together, etc. i know its common in fics to make the prank a huge fucking deal that almost breaks the marauders or has remus not talking to sirius for weeks which i find interesting bc i think according to canon sirius wasnt remorseful at all about it? and remus forgive him pretty quickly and casually (either bc he didnt want to lose his friends or maybe he just didnt care - he does after all at one point say they were idiots when they were kids and almost getting caught as animagi several times and not really taking things seriously). obviously it doesnt have to follow jkrs version of events but im curious what u think abt it all!

oh boy oh boy oh boy okay let's get into it i think. this might be a long one. i LOVE the prank as i have talked about on this blog in the past xx

personally i think there are so many ways to write the prank and just SO much to explore with it so. it is difficult for me to choose one set story of how i think it went down because i think it would depend on what story i was writing it into!! however hmmm how can i go about this...i think i'm gonna break it down step by step maybe and kinda talk about my preferred interpretations for each bit? so...here u go!

sirius telling snape

ok so when i am writing sirius. well one thing about him is that he IS a little mean to me. like i do not think kindness comes naturally to him i think it's something he has to work at and that if he isn't watching himself he can just be careless with other people's feelings, which is why he's a bit of a bully to the people he doesn't like. so while i can see interpretations of the prank where he is like...very intentionally and maliciously trying to put snape in danger, for whatever reason, and while i can also see interpretations where it was 100% unintentional and he was even tricked or forced or whatever, i prefer to take an approach sort of in between those two extremes.

so for me, sirius telling snape is generally more of like...a snapping situation. like there's other shit going on in sirius's life with his family (because this is the year he ran away, right? and i usually imagine the prank happening sometime after that) that he's dealing with and i think he is ALSO discovering his queerness and dealing with being closeted or perhaps trying very hard to suppress his feelings for a certain best friend that also make him particularly protective of said best friend and less willing to deal with snape's shit. and i imagine like all this going on and snape getting sirius alone at some point and antagonizing him in some way about remus or where the marauders all keep sneaking off to, and sirius just breaks and snaps at snape in a fit of anger where he's like. giving into that meanness that comes so easily and just wants to insult snape and yell at him. and i think sirius isn't really expecting snape to actually. go down the tunnel that very night but at the same time i think he's a bit careless about it as previously stated and just does not think through the full consequences and like storms off in a huff. and then once he realizes what he's done at first he like tries to tell himself snape probably WOULDN'T because he's embarrassed and guilty and doesn't want to admit he's fucked up...but then eventually he does tell the others and well. that's when james goes to the rescue!

snape going down the tunnel

so this is another point where i think there's quite a bit open to interpretation, because sure we hear that harry's dad supposedly saved snape's life, but...well let's be honest that could be an exagerrated account. as others have pointed out snape's worst memory is not this night, but rather a different instance where he clashed with the marauders. so! i think there's really quite a range here. you could write snape going down the tunnel as if he was barely in any danger at all and james just yanked him out right after he caught a glimpse or heard something that confirmed remus was a werewolf, or you could write a whole dramatic showdown where james had to face down with the wolf and risked his life to save snape.

personally i like to make things a little bit dramatic here, just for the angst. obviously james probably can't actually transform in front of snape if this is canon-compliant because snape didn't know the animagi secret, right? but...well i supposed james could like shove snape down the tunnel shut the door and then transform or something. so i do like this section with a little bit more risk, where james is perhaps put in a bit of danger as well, simply because i think it makes the opportunities for angst in the next section a little juicier <3

the fallout

aaaaand the part that everyone really loses their minds over!! again, quite a range of options here all of which i think are fertile ground for exploration, and obviously however u wrote the scene of snape going down the tunnel and sirius telling snape are going to impact the fallout a lot. again, i can see the interpretation where all of the marauders are really, really upset with sirius and sort of turn against him for a while, where there's some huge split in the friend group, etc etc. i can also see the interpretation that takes the canon more at its word when sirius and remus brush the incident off years later, and say that remus honestly didn't care that much once it became clear that no one was hurt and his secret wasn't going to get out.

however, following along from my interpretation of sirius-snapping-at-snape and somewhat tense tunnel danger, i once again like to take more of a middle ground approach between these two extremes. i quite enjoy prank angst where remus feels incredibly betrayed, even once he understands that sirius didn't intend to out his secret and that it was largely just carelessness, because i think sirius being careless with this secret would still really, really hurt remus. i also love when this is like...just around the time that both r + s are discovering their feelings for each other and still sort of dancing around it, because that just twists the knife a little bit more in them suddenly falling apart for a while as sirius repents and remus tries to figure out whether he can forgive sirius and like...deal with the pain of knowing this person who knows him so intimately in so many ways still doesn't understand how being a werewolf affects him.

however, for me this is not a situation where all the marauders turn against sirius. i think james's loyalty to his friends is one of his biggest blind spots, and i also like to write him with this tendency towards a bit of black and white thinking when it comes to morality as an additional flaw, such that he can't really believe that his friends, the people he loves, could ever actually be bad people. because...they're his friends! of course they're good! and in this way, i think the prank fallout can be used for really good foreshadowing about how these flaws will later come back to hurt james during the war.

so for me, james is upset with sirius, but he forgives him very quickly--perhaps even too quickly--because...well of course sirius didn't mean to!! sirius is a marauder! he's their best friend! he's dealing with a lot of shit, and james has a unqiue insight into that shit, being the person who sirius ran away to! and sirius is a good person, so obviously he deserves forgiveness! it was a horrible mistake, but nobody was actually hurt!

i think peter mostly goes along with james, because to me a canon peter is more concerned with james than either remus or sirius. like, i think him having a sort of secondary role within the friendgroup where he's always sort of following james around fits very much with his canon characterization and also sets up well, again, for his actions during the war. i also think peter wouldn't care very much, because...well. i don't think canon peter is a great person or has the strongest moral compass. i kinda feel like he'd be like "no one was hurt, all's well that end's well, let's just move on," though of course he would never say that out loud, because clearly all his friends think this is very upsetting.

and then. of course. remus and sirius.

to me, the prank is a critical moment in their relationship. like i said before, i imagine the prank happening just as their sort of beginning to explore their attraction to each other and the possibility that they might be more than just friends. for remus, i think the prank is sort of a wake-up call and a reminder that he and sirius have lived very different lives, and there are certain things about him that sirius will probably just...never understand. i also think it's a moment where remus sees a darker side of sirius, in that like...well remus has grown up with sirius and he knows this kid can be kind of mean sometimes, but he's never been on the other end of that. but now he knows that sirius, as hard as he tries, is still someone who just. hurts the people he loves sometimes. in very brutal ways. and the fact that it's largely unintentional almost makes it worse. because how can remus blame him? how can remus hold him accountable when he didn't even mean to do it?

so for remus i think it's this moment where he has to sort of balance the scales and decide if this budding love he feels for sirius is like...worth it, almost. if it's enough to override all the parts where they don't fit, all the ways they can hurt each other. and i think the fact that he does, eventually, choose to forgive sirius is an incredibly important indication of how much he loves him, and what he is willing to do for that love.

and for sirius this is also very much a wake-up call. like, up to this point i feel like sirius has very much sort of been this spiraling hot mess because of just all the shit building up with his family and him dealing with the aftermath of running away and being disowned. but this is a point where he has to step back and realize--hey, i don't want to be this kind of person. i don't want to be the guy that hurts the people he loves just because he's careless, and angry, and lashing out in whatever way he can to try and get a grip on a life that feels so largely out of his control. and i think it's also a wake-up call that there are things he hasn't understood about remus or hasn't really tried to understand, that since remus being a werewolf has never mattered that much to him (and has even been almost this fun thing, where it's like hey let's become animagi and run around during the full moon!) he just....hasn't considered how much it impacts remus's life. he's been selfish. and he doesn't want to be selfish anymore, because remus matters to him so much, and above all, he doesn't want to lose that. the prank, to me, marks a restructuring of sirius's priorities, and a sort of renewed focus on trying to actually become a better person and deal with his shit.

so i like to imagine...like, a pretty lengthy period of time, ranging anywhere from a few months up to like a year, during which remus and sirius are a bit estranged as they're both figuring all this shit out. and of course that places strain on their friend group--and i think this is the perfect time for remus to get a lot closer with lily, as he seeks out other friends when he doesn't want to be around sirius. but i do think that remus begins to slowly forgive sirius, and they just naturally start to float back together, until they finally do have like. one big conversation one day where they talk about what happened and remus forgives sirius. and i think that marks such an important shift in their relationship, and things get a lot more serious for them from there, because they have both now prioritized each other in a way that they were sort of dancing around before. regardless of how quickly they get together afterwards, i feel like it's after the prank that they each really become each other's person, because they both know they never want to lose the other like that again.

and there u have it!! my take on the prank. like i said, i can see lots of different interpretations even within the constraints of canon, but i think this is my favorite one <3

[script-a-world]

Submitted via Google Form:

I would like to have a planet that has a lot of things viewable and named in the sky. Rings, moons, shooting stars, satellites, asteroids, other stars, other planets, other moons, etc. I just like really want to fill it up. Yeah, you might think many of that is like we have in real life but I want to ramp it up even more, lots of fully identifiable ones other just you know, random dot in the sky. There have maybe 500 constellations. 30 planets and 15 dwarf planets in the solar system, of those maybe 8000 identified moons. As for shooting stars, maybe at any point on the planet they'd always be at least 20 that could be seen within the hour. Perhaps massive events can have up to 500 shooting stars in an hour. And of course the planet will definitely have a massive ring system because that sounds like a beauty to see. Basically, astronomy will be very very rich and active with so many things to observe. And that's just for natural stuff. And then people are definitely going to be putting hundreds of satellites that can be observed as well. Maybe even some space stations. Not to mention if there is plenty of space travel (mostly between the main planet and moons or moon to moon), space shuttles will be zipping through the air the same way you could see planes if you lived near an airport. Though, this will not be a civilisation that puts colonies on other planets, they're mostly just research stations although it won't be unheard of to have a small population of the scientists' families, and there just might be some extremely exotic and expensive vacation spots. The populace makes full use of their own planet and their moons. So, my question is, am I missing anything that makes this not work? Things that I should take into account I haven't? I'm not aiming for it to be super realistic but when I can, that's what I'd like to do.

Tex: Too many fish in a bucket and all you have are dead fish, not any water to keep them alive.

If you’re on a position on Earth where there’s approximately zero light pollution (something very difficult to do nowadays), you can see the stripe of the Milky Way with your bare eyes. It is in all actuality a bright stripe across the nighttime sky, and very hard to miss if unhindered by ground-level light pollution and the brightness of a lit Moon. It’s a small parcel of our own galaxy viewed from our position within it, and is estimated to have in that spot of the sky alone anywhere between a hundred to four hundred billion stars.

It is also, thereabouts, 26,000 light years away from us.

What gives the ostensibly density of the sky its luminescence is not how many objects we can see, but how far away we can see them. We don’t need hundreds of constellations, dozens of planets, or thousands of moons in front of our proverbial noses in order to have an uninterrupted swath of sparkles glittering down on us unimpeded during the night - only less pollution, both chemical and light.

On the other hand - having so many celestial objects so close to a narrative planet in question is indicative of a young planetary system still in the process of settling down in its formation, which is in an astronomical sense quite active. Your indication of frequent shooting stars supports that, which given some basic statistics means that you’re going to have a lot of meteoroids (Wikipedia) in your planet’s atmosphere.

The bigger a meteoroid is, the larger it looks as it burns through the atmosphere. After a certain size, it might or might not burn up in the atmosphere, which on Earth it tends to ignite in the atmosphere at about 100 km above sea level. According to the Wikipedia link, there are already tens of millions of objects entering the atmosphere on a yearly basis. Were you wanting that same amount for your world, or more?

As for another part of your question: It looks like you’re considering a research station (Wikipedia) that grew itself into a colony (Wikipedia). The inclusion of family members who are presumably not also there for the purposes of subject-specific research means that, according to Earth international law - something given more context in the listed Wikipedia links, the location is legally considered a place of habitation, and thus lends itself some form of permanency.

Antarctica, for reference, is considered a condominium in the eyes of international law (Wikipedia). All of these can be contained under the definition of a dependent territory, with various strings attached as to what government(s) they fall under.

The inclusion of vacation spots tells me that the original purpose of a research station has been largely outgrown and is considered a viable place for tourism. Tourism (Wikipedia) on Earth has some particular legal definitions, but for the purposes of your worldbuilding we’ll consider it temporary visitation for the purposes of business and/or leisure - more likely leisure as a vacation spot is generally intended for that sort of activity.

I feel like this would be a planet that has zoned areas as it grows, since it seems at least in part a planned settlement rather than an organic one. A dedicated area for the original research stations, residential areas, the accompanying support areas that come with raising families, and areas focused on leisure. A lot of this would depend on the geography of the planet, and where the original research stations were positioned and why.